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Thanks for listening to the Adam Carolla Show on podcast one. Well, Balde, Brian's going to give us a health update, he just had his MRI, got the news back from his MRI with this brain tumor and what's going on with that. So that's coming up. We'll talk all about funerals and the cost and much more. First, I'll tell you about pure talk USA with AT&T, Verizon, T-Mobile. Hmm.
How about you get with pure talk USA? They use the exact same network as those big cell carriers, use same towers, same coverage, but it literally half the cost. I talk to these guys and I thought at first I thought they had their own cell network or something. It's like, how do you pull this off now? They use the ones the big guys use, the one you're probably using right now. You're just paying way too much.
I'm a customer. I kept my phone. They sent me a SIM card, and you get the same service. I have the same service I had before, which is half the price. Unlimited talk and text, two gigs of data, just 20 bucks a month. Everyone, the average person saves 400 bucks a year. So why not save a bunch of dough and go with pure talk? USA get unlimited talk, unlimited text, plus two gigs of data.
All you need to do is grab your mobile phone, dial down to 50 and say keyword Adam Corolla, that's Paon to five. So say the keyword Adam Corolla. And when you do, you'll save 50 percent off your first month. Hey, hey, hey, this is NFL Hall of Famer Ray Lewis. I'm excited to announce the launch of my new podcast Every Day Greatness, the Ray Lewis podcast. I'll be talking with friends, family members, old teammates, athletes, celebrities, moguls.
And guess what? I'll be talking to you. Listen, this is all in the search for everyday greatness. So I'm asking you to come along with me on this. Right. Download new episodes of Everyday Greatness, the Ray Lewis podcast every Friday on Spotify, apple pie cards and old podcasts, one dot com.
It's not what you have. It's what's inside of you that actually inspires greatness. And from Karola One Studios in Glendale, California, this is the Adam Carolla Show, Adam's guest today, king of the highwire Nik Wallenda with Genographic on news, bald Brian on sound effects. And Jordan Harbinger drops by. And now. He's emotionally drained about actual drainage. Adam Corolla, yeah, get it on. Got to get a truck with him, give him a loan.
Thanks for tuning in and thanks for telling the friend. I love that about use on the ratings went up last week. So thanks for thanks for sharing.
Good day, Gina. Good day to you and Valbrun. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. We're going to get an MRI update from Brian in a second. Yes. I was on the phone with an attorney from Geragos office on my ride home last night when he was like, you think we could interview some of the neighbors to test that this thing was working, that the drainage was working? And I was like, yeah, we could or they could just fucking give me a piece of paper and get the fuck on with my life, which you'll find about the city.
And the government in general is they have an endless amount of time. Their time is not your time. You measure time very differently. They could go on either way. They can paid either way and they can go on with the same. You can you could do battle over the same whatever with them in perpetuity. And they don't care. They just have to do it. They just get paid. That's essentially how they work. So, yes.
So now we're going to have to craft a letter to the city with Garagos. Is his name on front of it or is stationary and his CRAs? Then we'll see if we can get some satisfaction. The satisfaction with the city's always just getting back to zero. Yeah, it's always just you never win.
There's just degrees of losing.
Yes, I, I learned this many, many years ago when I was doing Kevin and being nice to yell about it on on the air back in the nineties, but just about two blocks from here where the studio is, there's this intersection in Burbank.
And it was it was the T shaped intersection and it was the one where the street would go by the mall in Burbank, where the movie theater and the restaurants, everything in the main drag would go through Burbank and just run into the mall where the P.F. Chang's is. And at some point in the mid nineties, I had scurried across the street. I told you guys the light was green, but the the don't walk was flashing. I walked across.
I made it to the other side. I was so much on the other side. I was so safe on the other side that the cop who wrote me a ticket, the motorcycle cop, went the same direction I went after I went. So he literally scurried across on his motorcycle after I idea after I was standing on the sidewalk and he was giving me this explanation about how it was unsafe, what it is that I do. I love the safety issue.
I love I love if you're doing eighty four miles an hour on the grapevine with the sun shining in zero, you know, ten thousand mile visibility and the cop going the other direction on the grapevine hits you with the radar detector. And that guy just a full Dukes of hazard. Brodin comes across the median and shoots gravel onto it and fishtails and catches up to you. He then gives you a safety explanation about you're going was unsafe. Eighty four miles an hour in a straight line.
But this guy gave me safety speech and I just said to him, hey, man, I'm going to fight this ticket because why wouldn't I? I just walked across the street in a crosswalk and now you're giving me a jaywalking ticket and I'm standing on the other side and the light's still green, my direction and there's nothing going on.
It's like, well, go ahead and fight it if you want. Like, OK, OK, then you have to go down to the court. You have to pay in full. So now they have your money in full and then you have to go prove to them why they should give it back to you. I then made a court date, I then went back. And this is our White Lives Matter speech brothers. I then went back and the cop never showed up because I don't he probably knew he didn't have a great case.
And the judge threw it out.
And then everyone kept saying to me, you won. You won the case. And I was like, I did. I win. I kind of miss today kind of a check for one hundred eleven dollars. And I got it back. After three days of going back and forth at the fucking courthouse, what did I win? That's a Pyrrhic victory. Yes, a win would have been that douche was never born. But I would also take him giving me a warning and getting on a scooter and fucking hitting the brakes.
But now I got I got a victory and the victory I'm going to get from the city block and yada, if I do get it, is way too much time wrapped up into a subject that really deserve no no time but victory.
And I'm sure it'll warm your heart is they've changed that law. And at least in our of of California, you can now, you know, walk with and when it's blinking red or whatever, as long as you get to the other side before it, before the light changes.
So, Adam, cruel, you know, long that you're actively. That's right. Activist.
Yeah, yeah. That the that and the field goal. Race will be my legacy, so I was just at the other shop and I said hi to Judd Apatow, who's sitting down nothing interviews for our Mad magazine doc and it's so crazy. The range in people in this town there are the Judd Apatow sounds easy as hell and has nothing to do with their schedule. You know, Jay Leno's easy. You know, Bryan Cranston's an easy guy. Apatow is easy.
Kevin Costner's an easy guy. That's just easy, guys. And then they're super fucking difficult guys. And there's no there's nothing you couldn't do it by their income or the amount of movies they made or success or anything. It's just they're just some guys are just regular easy. They seem to be happier people.
Well, yeah. And I know you do. I do, too. I have unemployed friends who are harder to make plans with.
And these megastars. Yeah. And it's it's also like you tell Judd Apatow, you know, 12, 13, he's there at 12, 15 and Cranston, same way like it's not I think people mistake. It's sort of like rich people aren't nice or poor people are noble. You're a dick or you're not is really your income, your FICO score. It doesn't make a difference. I know plenty of fucking douchy poor people. I know plenty of flaky poor people.
And I know plenty of like rich celebrities that are early and super friendly. Like, it just it's just who you are.
It's yeah. It's it's it's it's hammered at a young age, hopefully.
Yeah. Or or it's not hammered into you and it's like. You're wiring like I I noticed Sunny Natalia really didn't have much hammered into them except for Hot Pockets, but we didn't do a lot of it was there was a lot of sage advice or anything. Sunny is is mellow, easy, very calls. Everyone missed their this and missed her that very respectful and just, you know, whatever, you know, whatever you say to them, like, you know, we were in Monterey and he had grabbed an OJ, we pulled into like a Starbucks or something where to stand in there.
He grabbed an O.J. and he's like, I'm gonna have an O.J. and a breakfast sandwich and a blueberry muffin. And I said, well, Sunny, though, just got a ton of sugar and the blueberry muffins got a ton of sugar. So you went the went the blueberry muffin, you went the O.J. and he went, I'll take the blueberry muffin. He put the OJ back. Now, if that was Natalia, we'd have to gear up for battle rounds.
We literally have to start padding up and and still be there. We'd still be there just screaming right now at each other because that wouldn't have worked for her. But Sonny got it, you know, OK, and it's just a wiring. Cranston has it and Leno has it and Apatow has it. And there are others who do not. And it's just them, I think we think being becoming rich or becoming a celebrity or notable or famous turns you into that.
You don't. Look, Mariah Carey didn't become Mariah Carey. She was always Mariah Carey. Now she's Mariah Carey.
The people listen to her in a spotlight. Yeah.
The only difference is when you're you know, you're working as a waitress, people aren't going to listen to you like there's not going to let you be a diva.
That was like the famous law with Madonna when she was nobody in New York and still demanded her own dressing room and still demanded this and that.
People like, who are you? Get out of here. What are you ever going to amount to? I mean, she it was just who she was.
Yeah. You can't you can't give money to a normal person and make them Madonna right then. And or you could unless it's already in them, know it's got to be in them.
Yeah. Yeah. That the money enables them to do what they're doing but it's there, the money is the weapon but they're still it's still a serial killer that lies beneath the skin by your logic.
And I think it's I think it's sound for every million dollars I would make, I would apologize ten times more.
Yes. Well, it is true. There is the point where you understand people recognize you and you don't want to leave the bad tip or you don't want to be rude to the uber driver or whatever. There's another direction we can go. All right. So actually, Cranston's going to be on the show tomorrow and the towns over there.
We wanted to talk to Brian about this MRI results, which he got today. This morning, the the to set the table had the tumor.
No, not much movement in the tumor for a decade and more or less. Yeah. And then some movement and movement is bad. And then on new medication down significantly weight wise, down about twenty five thirty pounds. And now checking to see if, if it, if it in fact has moved, it has grown or changed in any way. Right.
So two months ago got the last MRI and that was the one that had a couple little dots and a couple little thickening of the tumor and that was enough to make my doctor go. You know what? This is probably the time to take a little bit of aggressive action. We want to get ahead of this thing. This is the right time to do it. So if you put me on this medication, Stivarga that I've been on for two months, debilitating, you guys heard my voice for a couple of minutes.
It was pretty bad. And just the side effects were awful top to bottom. We got the results of the new MRI today after two months of this medication to see if it worked. So it's good news and there's bad news. I'll start with the bad news. The bad news for all of you is if you thought that I was smug after beating cancer once.
Oh, fucking brace yourselves, because the good news is the medication worked.
OK, well, the enhancement is gone. The two little dots that showed up, that's totally gone. The the thickening of the tumor has reduced quite a bit for the tumor may have even shrunk.
Hold on, Chris, don't. I was going to set a blow call in to Mark DeCarlo after the show. Oh, I'll leave that one alone. Yeah, go ahead. I'll keep going.
Yeah. Yeah, go ahead. So, yeah, the thickening of the tumor that I saw the little look a little thicker on the last MRI that was gone, maybe even shrunk a little bit, which was an ancillary benefit. I guess if there is a. Dark lining to the silver cloud, it's that this medication is like, here's the here's the conundrum. This medication is really rough on you, but it works.
So we now have to decide where what avenue to go down in terms of I want to keep you on this medication.
It works and I'll keep you on it for a total of six months. But, you know, you're obviously your quality of life is suffering. And what we kind of settled on the good news, it's kind of flexible, the dosage. So he's like, I've been taking four pills every morning for the last two months. He's like, well, let's do three pills, because you might, you know, have gotten to a level of toxicity with too much of the medications.
Let's do three pills reduced to like 25 percent. Hopefully it has the same efficient effectiveness. You called it a different word.
Efficiency, efficacy. Thanks. Yeah.
So efficiency, you know, it works is when did this the first so the first Avastin, the first medication was an experimental ten plus years ago and a lifesaver.
It had been recently approved for like recently done a few months ago when I started it, it had been recently approved for other types of cancer, blood vessel inhibitor, colon cancer, colorectal cancer, and doctors were using it for brain.
What's the second drug when called Stivarga? It works similarly. It's a blood vessel inhibitor. So it's very similar.
What's this, around ten years ago? Oh, no, no, this this is I'm sorry, I'm confused, Avastin was the drug from 10 years, right? What's new? This one was this one years ago.
This one is called Stivarga. And it's also relatively new, not as new, maybe two or three.
But the point is, is that the first one, Botchy the ten years to get to this one. Yes. Yes.
This would not this was not around this lot around five years ago. There's only been one for two or three years.
And it works the same way. And thankfully I responded to it really well, despite the, you know, massive annoying side effects.
Well, let me speak to that for a second. First off, everyone always hates Big Pharma, but they invent shit that save people oftentimes say, well, Ryan and I don't know what I'm going through with the fucking city right now. Would you like the government just to kind of take this one over and handle handle this? I'm sorry. I look and people go their profits. They make such big profits like I get it. I want them incentivized to make profits.
I know there's a downside to that, but I want them trying to make money so guys like Brian could be with us for four good long time as far as your quality of life.
If you want to get philosophical about it, your side effects are bad, but your quality of life is still a lot better than mine.
You're right. You know, a silver lining.
I real victims have to get up and run around everywhere all fucking day and clean shit and run run around and answer phone calls and stuff all day. So your quality of life is actually better. But the side effects. But but if you just let the dust settle, I think the quality of life with the side effects may trump my zero side effects and horrible quality of life. You give me a lot to think about.
I'll let you think about that a minute. He's still speaking to quality of life.
I was I got a tweet about my dad playing the trumpet. And again, I'm on year four of trying to settle my dad's trumpet woes. As you know, he wanted a new trumpet for about three years. And then we got the new trumpet and then he wanted another trumpet. Now he's got his four thousand dollar trumpet, but he wants me to take it in and have it checked out. But there's no place to take it because every place is closed with a covid.
We have to check out. There's another check out. I don't know what are the chances of a brand new four thousand dollar trumpet? It's a lemon, you know what I mean? All right. I bet you if I handed it to that guy from KAC, he'd be like dad to shame. Hey, cake guy. I thought I could get cake guy heard of are still alive.
You can is probably older than my dad and he his younger lungs on that. But I bet I could get cake guy to come to my dad's house and and blow blow that thing. Shelley so we had our trumpeter send me a tweet. He's a guy trumpet's and shoots forty four. We have that Max Panner somewhere. Do you have his tweet. I got right here, the trumpet isn't the issues, Charlie Cook says it's the strength of his embouchure.
His chops, long tones would good. It could also be his age. Hmm.
Yeah, I'm gonna go it's pops lip rather than the actual equipment. This is this is this is pilot error here. That's that's what I said yesterday.
Yes, you have. Well, I think we all suddenly knew what was going on. Yeah. Yeah, sure. We listen can we listen to it one more time. And he should explain to me that something's wrong with that.
Long's van. Hey, Brian, you want to talk about with quality of life. Did you have to spend four thousand dollars to buy your dad a trumpet just to have him blow it at you and got something off? You got to take it back. No, man, I'm winning.
You're winning a trial, right? Yeah.
You have a little numbness in your hand. Well, salty food tastes bitter, I get it, but is it all it all pales. It all takes a back seat to this, right?
Yeah. Think about this in the grand scheme.
This is how I spend my I don't live here. It just sounds talking to my dad about playing a trumpet.
And I think your dad might have just beat your mom in lack of self-awareness because at no point did he say like, oh, this trumpet sounds weak.
It must be me now.
I'm the weak one little bit now that the plan was to see if we could kind of patched up our relationship before he died.
But now it's me just sitting at the business end of his trumpet where he's gone.
The action on the valve is bad, goes against. That's fine, right? Sounds like a trumpet. All right.
So do we have our do we have our our gun guns shooting? Trump is raising a child playing a couple of familiar tunes.
Huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh. The precautions, of course, but I don't know if I want him to be my band teacher or my gun teacher, he's just proficient. I love that guy.
I don't know. There's something so satisfying. Maybe it's the camera angle we'll put it is Adam Corolla dot com? Yes. You know what?
You're satisfied by that all this is being done in a tie? Yes. He's in a formal outfit for that. And it's the best part.
All right. Let's see. I've got a couple of calls up there. And let's see, we take a couple of these. I'll just go down the line. Christian Whuffie, Montana.
Yeah. How are you? Yeah, it's funny. I was thinking I kept thinking about when you're from Montana and I think about Charlie playing the horn and shooting his gun. I always think about Nate's brothers, like you got a dog that needs to be put down. I'll do it.
That's a special service. And it's pretty common up here, is it?
Oh. You can find somebody to shoot a dog pretty easy. All right, so Krishan, you heard me talk about moving to Montana. Do you think it's a bad idea? I've heard you encouraging other people to do it and yes, please don't. We're full hour more than we can possibly take. Yeah.
What do you how long you been in Montana and where are you in Montana? I was born here, I'm in Helena, in the capital city, and how sparse was it when you were growing up? We probably had 650, 700000 people, and we're now over a million.
And what do you sing like? Are there trends? You're seen more princes. What are you seeing? And what would let you know that these folks are out of towners? Their plates are just driving around my neighborhood here. Lots of California plates, lots of Texas plates. We took a trip last weekend to kind of the middle part of the state and found 28 different state license plates of people traveling around. Home prices are going up. They're just the traffic's getting worse.
There's too many people. So, yeah, we don't encourage people to move here.
You know, it's interesting, as I think about it, I remember as a kid this an interesting little yardstick. But as a kid, I used to see a lot of out of town plates in California, in Los Angeles. And we even had a game like out of town, plate it smack your sister in the arm, you know, the back of the car you'd spot out of town plate and you drive along the freeway and it wouldn't take you five minutes to spot the out of town plate.
I don't see as many out of town plates in Los Angeles. I used to see a lot, maybe, maybe less are coming in theory because they're all observed the same thing.
My theory is that a lot of out of town plates, especially in places like Los Angeles or, you know, tourist destinations, people are kind of out of town rental cars. You know, people are going to the airport that drive all over Universal City, go to Disneyland, go to wherever.
Now, with the advent of Uber and Lyft, I think you see a lot less of that, frankly, less rental cars on the road.
But I think a lot of the out of town plates or a portion of the out of town plates are people who've relocated here and leave the plates on their car for X amount of months or even even longer, which I'm not seeing. You know what I mean? That's true.
But you're the law as it used to be, because my girlfriend had New Jersey plates way back in the day. You had to change it within six months.
So that's a pretty small issue.
I mean, people, of course, push it. You know, I think everyone milks it as long as they can milk. They're not going to get tickets or whatever it is. But I just don't see as many out of town plates. And I'll bet you have. Montanas has gone up while Los Angeles or California has gone gone down. And of course, the your greatest citizen left almost immediately. The great Evel Knievel.
There's not even Evel Knievel days anymore. They canceled that. Oh, really? Well, his oldest son, Kelly, got in a in a in a big confab with the city of Butte. And so they haven't had it for the last two or three years.
What what what was the beef with Kelly Knievel and Evil and Butte, Montana, where Evel Knievel is from?
I it was licensing or something, Kelly didn't think they were getting a I can't remember if it was he didn't think they were getting a big enough cut.
You know, it's a big Zorya operation, but, you know, it is kind of a weird burden. It's a very I think getting back to our philosophical, like, you don't have to be mean just because you're rich or whatever that I think you would wish for, at least for your kids, is to sort of maintain your estate when you're gone. So it's like you were the famous one, then you died. Then you think this is cool because now you get left this catalog.
Are these movies or this name thing? It's always one big legal battle. You always get into a legal battle with the former manager of the person who dies, siblings and or the siblings. Yeah, I think there's some of this was going on with the Newman when we were like doing the Newman dock. And like, this guy doesn't talk to that, doesn't have anything to do with the foundation because this guy's running it and he hates this guy.
But Paul left this guy in charge. It's it's a it's a lot of legal stuff. A lot of no matter how much money you make off your dad, your dead dad or mom's name, it always feels like you got gypped somehow because beaute is making more money off of your dad than you are or the legal counsel or your dad's business partner or the ne'er do well, half brother sister. I mean, if somebody got caught in, that shouldn't have.
It's just a it's it sounds very first world problem. But think about it like that would be a sucky way to spend your adult life, a constantly doing court battles with ex-wives and, you know, folks, attorneys and the names and the things. And you never really establish your own identity because it's like you are battling for your dad's identity, steward of his life. Right. Right.
It's just it's it never goes clean and you don't end up having a life. You end up having you end up litigating your dad's life over and over again, right?
Yep. Yeah. Speaking of be careful what you wish for. Jake's leaving. California is headed for Boise. Boise, Idaho. Consider Montana. Yeah, Jake. Forty one Palos Verdes. Yeah.
Hey, guys. Wanted to let you know I've I'm a business owner in California and I've been pretty unhappy with the state of the greater Los Angeles area for a while and the direction California is going, I, I own a business. I'm impacted by income taxes and all the other taxes and cost here. And now they're talking about another income tax increase in California. And now now that it's kind of made me realize we can all work remotely. And now that our four kids have been cooped up in our house for four months, my wife kind of realizes even she's kind of getting on board with maybe this isn't the best place to raise a family anymore.
And there's opportunities elsewhere. So I'm taking the opportunity to while I'm on travel next week, I changed my flight home. Instead of flying directly back from DC, I'm going to fly through Boise and I've got appointments set with a real estate agent.
I'm checking out neighborhoods and I'm looking at houses of it's weird. It's it's interesting that you always think about this. All right. I guess I used to think about it in terms of like foreign nationals, like Chinese people are coming in and they're buying houses and you pick the land. But it's this is a rare thing, I think, that a bunch of Americans are just going to other places and shopping and fleeing and. Yeah, I know. And the thing about Los Angeles are and or California especially is like people don't want to leave.
It's the weather's great and the coastline is great. There's still lots of good stuff to enjoy and celebrate. But yeah, if you run a business, you have to make business decisions. And if you're a school teacher or something, you don't, that's fine. But if you run a business, you're going to have to make those kinds of decisions. And just like, you know, everything that was being built in Detroit ends up getting built in Mexico or China.
You know, you're making business decisions. I think that people think that, you know, they think Ford or Apple Computers or Nike, it's like they're evil. It's like, no, no, they're making business decisions now. Maybe they're giving money to people. You don't you don't want to have the money, but they're making business decisions. And if you run a business and you live in California, you're going to have to start making business decisions.
And that sounds like that's what Jake is getting ready to do. Where were you on Palis, Verde's, by the way?
That's so nice. We're there's four cities actually in Palos Verdes, SWER, and one called Rolling Hills Estates. Yeah, well, good news. Go ahead, Genographic. I just wonder why Boysie. Oh, why Boise?
Oh, well, we we want a much bigger home. We have four kids and we looked at areas where is affordable. We started in Salt Lake City. You can get enormous homes there. But we were a little concerned, you know, we'd be the vast minority. I mean, our kids could literally be amongst in schools with literally like 95 percent Mormons, which it can be difficult, you know, if they're going to like they will have no friends on Sundays, for example.
So we kind of expanded our look from there. And we always we heard about Boise kind of being a hidden gem. We've also heard that people from Boise say not we're all full up. Right. Assholes from California. We don't want them anymore. But I figure, look, if I'm leaving California because maybe my ideals align more with a native Idahoan than a native Californian, then why wouldn't they want our family back?
And you said you said Idaho is a hidden gem. Are you aware that Idaho is called the gem state?
Oh, I think I learned that when looking at home the other day. You're right. I think it's time.
Yeah. Good one.
Thanks, Jay. Keep us up. Keep us updated. I'm curious how this goes.
Oh, yeah. If any if anything else happens, I'll I'll call you back later. Thank you. All right. Let me hit Albert here. Get a handle on your money without the stress. Download Albert finance apps and a lot of the finance apps lack a little humanity. Well, not Albert. That combined real human guidance with proven technology. So you stay in control. You can access real financial advisors. You can message any time through the app.
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All right, we'll take a quick break. We'll talk to Jordan. Harbingers got his topic, which is timely, probably based on what we're talking about was a funeral and funeral homes and what a massive rip off they are. So we'll take a quick break and we'll talk to him right after this. There's no shortage of action going on with our exclusive partners at BET Online AGEA sports are slowly making its way back. MLB and now NBA join UFC, boxing, NASCAR and soccer.
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And now Al Gore presents definitely not a. Dateline Bossier City, Louisiana, a twenty six year old man was charged with simple criminal damage to property. By swimming inside an aquarium. Definitely not a. I thank the good people from our for sponsoring that, so when it got going on 15 years now, a great relationship with them, a Jordan Harbinger is going to shine some light on the subject of funerals and funeral homes and what a rip off that is.
Also, I'll tell you that it's brought to you by a NetSuite, and you can thank them for bringing on guys like Jordan Harbinger and NetSuite, the world's number one cloud business system trusted by more than 19000 companies. It's the last system you'll ever need.
Intro Dorson NetSuite presents The Wonderful World of Business with Jordan Harbinger.
So what do you know, Jordan?
Well, all of us are going to have to plan a funeral at some point, whether it's somebody else's or ours. But chances are both. And it's a 20 billion dollar business in the U.S. alone. So there's a lot of people dying and the costs have gone up 13 hundred percent since 1980 or so, which is when, you know, I was first coming into the world. So the difference in a funeral price between me burying or my family burying my grandpa and somebody who dies today is could be upwards of ten thousand dollars or even fifty thousand dollars.
It's so it's right up there. There's certain things. It's like it's like couples who get married and they don't live in a house and they don't own a condo or any kind of property. And they're spending all their money on a on a European vacation.
You know, they're they're they're they're going to honeymoon in Europe, you know? And I'm always like, take that money and put it into a condo in Germany. The wedding. Yeah. Or just the wedding. Right. Like, save that money and buy something. And you're literally just burying money in this case. And also in a world where we understand that buying airline tickets in advance saves you a lot of like if you're planning a trip to Phoenix, you buy your tickets five weeks in advance, you don't get gouged buying them three days in advance.
We all may not know if we're going to Phoenix or not, but we're all going to die like we all got that. And it's a euphemism. You never know when you're going to Phoenix, right? You never know.
What strikes me is I'll bet you most people die and then you make the funeral arrangements after the person dies, including, I'm speaking from experience, a thirteen thousand dollar casket that I bought my father in law. And there's no doubt that if that casket or any of this stuff had been paid for in advance, it would not cost what this cost. But they they they know it. I don't think I think it's an emotional thing that people don't want to deal with it.
And so they just do it all at the end in Phoenix this morning.
So you're definitely on the right track. I mean, the death business plays on your grief. So they know that the last thing you want to do when your loved one dies is haggle over pricing, shop around in comparison shop, put your foot down when the bill gets too high and complain about how they're price gouging. Most people can barely make it through the day without falling apart, much less with an experienced vendor who's sort of trying to pretend that they care about your situation while also jacking up revenue as high as possible in every conceivable way.
I'll tell you know, this is the most the real grieving begins when the funeral ends and everyone from the family comes up to you and goes, hey, thank you.
I thank you. And, you know, why are you thanking me?
What I did? Thanks. Really appreciate it. And, you know, OK, what I came for you thanking me. It's like, oh, you you paid for everything. You pay for everything. Like, Oh, OK, you're welcome. I'm here now. Yeah.
Twenty thousand bucks. Yeah. It's awesome.
It adds up so fast. And look, even if I'm not trying to outright scam you, there are meeting you in this moment of extreme vulnerability which gives them this massive upper hand in negotiation. Again, it's the three day Phoenix, three days beforehand. Phoenix, take it. Oh, you know, we have these ridiculous prices. How bad do you need to go to Phoenix? All right.
Well, I usually yeah. Lead time is the way to save money on almost anything you do in a hurry means you have to pay for it and.
Well, yes, I was just thinking. It's all right. It's like the other side of the coin because you hear about when you buy a residential property as opposed to commercial property, real estate agents are playing on the same thing. On the other side of the coin, the happiness, the future, the possibilities. You'll have kids and this will be their yard. And can you imagine, put yourself in this position and and you're jacking up the price because you're getting emotional about your future.
You're. Sighted about it on the other side of the coin, you're in grief, like you said, you're depressed. You just want this all to go away and this big, you know, this person comes and wraps their arms around you and then and then asks for your credit card.
Not just that you're in it, but there's also an additional emotional component, which if you're not spending the right amount of money, you're not really there's there's a subtle like you're not honoring this person correctly.
You don't care. You don't apply to this. But that's how most people feel.
Yeah, well, we're Neptun people now. So what is what would be. So my family's all in the Neptune Society, so they actually paid their thirty bucks, you know, fifty years before they die. And then that's it. And we don't we didn't do anything. My my grandmother.
Right. My grandfather was taken away and my grandmother was taken away and we never went, there was never an event attached to it. There was no funeral or wake or anything. But my my grandmother did have a wake for my grandfather, but it was about two and a half to three years after what year did my grandfather Dymocks iPad at ninety seven. I think you can look it up.
It the way that we had for him was definitely in the middle beginning of 2000, the year, the year 2000. I think he died like ninety seven. So ninety seven what when. Ninety nine. Ninety seven July ninety seven.
It was over three years, over three years after he died and we had a gathering at my grandmother's house and then when my grandmother died and then my mom took about three years and we had to wait there. I think it was funny because like my grandmother was like my grandma was like ninety one. My grandmother was like ninety. When they died, they lost at least 70 percent of their friends in those three years. Their friends were their age, you know, so down the guesclin, they all just died.
Yeah. More ambrosia salad for me.
I heard my mom announce from the kitchen less to us and men cupcakes bring me the big spoon.
Yeah, but they were Neptune Society people and it didn't cost us a penny. I just remember sitting next to one of my grandmother's old friends at my grandfather's wake and she was explaining that she turned on the TV and it was twenty minutes of me talking about defecation. That's she kept saying, I don't know, half the episode. I don't know who these people are. A weird the weird old people who confront you all the time, you know what I mean?
Like I, I turned on TV last night and you were on and you were talking about defecation. By the way, the thing about these fucking people that I hate is they know everything and they know nothing. So when you you were just talking about defecating for four, it was twenty minutes. And I go, I, I'm sure it wasn't twenty minutes, but what, what were you watching. I don't know what channel. I don't, I don't.
Well what was I with was I wish Dr. Drew was with Jimmy Kimmel. Was it a man. I, I honestly I couldn't. OK, you can't tell me anything about it. You're telling me I talk about defecating for twenty minutes. You don't know the person with sitting next to me. You don't know what channel it was. I don't know if it's a rerun, but that's how I. That's all I remember from my grandfather's wake. The the other the only thing I remember from my grandmother's wake.
It's one of the old friends innocently doddering over to my mom, who's always a depressed mass and hates hates her mom's guts. And what turns you on? Helen Gorog was your mom. Oh, that must have been an interesting life. And I was like, oh, mom, it's going to break down into a heap of tears as she starts screaming about Child Protective Services. I don't know what's going to happen, but I'm getting the fuck out of here.
Those are that's those are my memories. That's my lasting memory.
Well, you know what part of your content makes an impact when they only remember the defecation and not the channel and not who hosted it with you?
So I kept saying I kept saying I can't talk about defecation on TV for 20, 20 minutes. It was a full 20 minutes. That's all I remember at Tell Edison Research.
They're going to want that data. I think, how do we save money then?
What is the what is the plan?
So the whole thing with Casket's and everything is a monopoly. There used to be like 700 casket companies in 1950 or so. Now there's one hundred and fifty. So you have to comparison shop. Everything is sort of guided you. It's all like path of least resistance. Is this insanely expensive urn or casket or whatever. They're just guiding you gently there. And the markup is bananas, 300 to 500 percent. So of course, you mentioned earlier plan ahead, but don't just go in earlier.
You have to negotiate every the price of every individual item.
And they have to, by law, show you that a lot of people don't know that. They'll be like, oh, here's this package we have. And you negotiate a thousand dollars off this fourteen thousand dollar a funeral package. But what you should be doing is saying, look, this is a fourteen thousand dollar package. The casket is four grand. Well, it's this model. All right. I'm going to go on line. Wal-Mart has caskets.
They probably don't display them in many stores, but they have them. You can call and say, what does this model casket cost or similar? And it will be like a fifth of the price.
I think I. I think I found a doppelganger of my thirteen thousand dollar casket for like nine eighty nine at Costco. I think I think I think Costco had the exact same like Royal Blue Cat. I mean, look.
Yeah, but you have to buy them. Well, I'm burying the football team. Yeah that's funny. But yeah, you can go to Costco and get one of these things and and I still don't know what's going on with the with the Neptune Society, but I think you could definitely sign up for that. But you have to be you have to be without it's good if you're if Jesus has been removed from your life and you're bitter, if as long as you hate the people you're bearing like my family, then then it's a it's a good it's a good move.
There's one more option and it's a talk about a pain in the ass. They have to turn you away three times. You could convert to Judaism where you're supposed to be. You're not embalmed and you're buried in a pine box. Oh, there you go.
I think you could just you might be able to just lie about that. I don't know how much they check the deceased for official conversion, though.
They'll check with family members. They don't play. They don't really. That's dependents you belong to. Costco's got to have.
Ah, or Wal-Mart. They've got to have some wide body caskets. Right. I mean, you can't it's not one size fits all if you.
Yeah. Like not these days.
Maybe in the eighties it was one size fits all. I remember reading stories, my mom would go that man was so big he had to be buried in a piano box and they literally must have like ten percent of their volume.
Is these size gaskets were any.
Yeah. It'd be funny if you're talking to the grief counselor at the Costco and it's like, oh, he was a big fan. Yeah. Perhaps he spent a little too much time by the cheese samples that could have that could have caused the heart attack. And it could be the reason we're putting out a leaf in your coffin right now or go and winding that baby out the sheet cake for one slice out the.
Yeah, I used to here. And I don't know if any of these stories are true, but when I was growing up, this is mid 70s stuff there was always a slew of and she's being buried in her Cadillac like she loved her. She loved she loved her Jaguar. And she what she wanted to be buried in it. And she's going to be buried in and I'm like, I was nine going, is that true? Like, she wanted to be buried in her Cadillac.
And so she's her wishes were to be buried in her. There was a lot of those there was a piano box there that had had to bury him in a piano box. And then there was buried in her Rolls Royce, which I don't know, I don't work for the EPA or OSHA, but there's a lot of brake fluid transmission.
Yeah, toxic metals. You mentioned that it's funny that Jordan is talking about negotiating down, which everyone should do, Kristi's grandma, Christi's grandma, negotiated up. She was buried in a sarcophagus.
Mm. Well, you know, they still had, like, what's left of the Nile. Yeah.
I don't think it was gold that the absurd, but it was a shiny heavy sarcophagus.
Is that different than a casket. Is it just inside the casket.
Goes inside the sarcophagus. Basically it seems to be preserved. Yeah. Yeah.
It's like the the yes. The coffin wasn't enough. She needed that. She needed a coffin, Kostner or coffin conduct a coffin cozies songs were doing alliteration here.
That's it's such an interesting insight. Which is and I'm curious about Krista respectfully, of course, the wiring of Christie's grandmother, which is like my family, are kind of narcissists who do nothing for anyone else. But they're also willing to be just cremated and tossed into a ceiling fan like they have no thoughts about themselves after they're dead. But they don't do anything for anybody. They're kind of egotistical while they're alive. But wanting to be buried in a sarcophagus is what is the wiring?
They're sort of emotion. Was she a flamboyant person? Was she into her own stuff like what she did? What was she like?
I got the key. I got the kid that's going to make it all snap into focus. I didn't know the woman well. I was only married to Christie for a few years while she was still alive.
Very sweet lady, but she was very religious. I think the I think that was a way to honor the body and the spirit, you know what I mean? She she gave a lot of money to Kenneth Copeland and a lot of online. But Jordan, maybe you can do a segment about that.
Sometimes I just I'm like, I am writing that down right now. So I think that was a way for her to honor the Lord and the spirit, the body.
So she sort of with the thought that she would want to be in good shape for further in mind. I think I think very religious people are a segment of them believe that, you know, when judgment day comes, the souls that are buried in the earth, the poor souls are going to get taken up.
How is she good. How is her soul going to get out of, you know, how they get the box open? So to work that hard. Right.
But it seems like she wanted a little bit of the Tupperware fact versus could be being creative. Discuss it with her. Yes. Yes. Interesting.
So, Adam, with all of this with all of this conversation, are you going to let your father be buried with the trumpet that he hated?
God, are you going to want to return on that investment? Jesus Christ. Yeah. Who's going to get the trumpet?
Oh, and the one asset that he has. You bought it. Well, maybe I'll bury it with him so we can hand it to Gabriel. And Gabriel can go now. The actions. Fine, Jim. Turns out you have a horrible lap. Here you go. Hey, maybe that's how it'll work. I don't know much about religion. All right, Jordan, the Jordan Harbinger show, by the way, podcast available on Spotify and podcast one as well.
And you can say hi to him at at his website, Jordan Harbinger dot com. Do we have an outro?
What a wonderful world of business Jordan Harbinger brought to you by that sweet you know, I want to thank our partners over NetSuite and tell you guys you can schedule your free product tour right now and get a free guide. Seven Keys, seven key strategies to grow your profits at NetSuite. Dotcom Slash Adam support a great sponsor. Jordan always thought provoking. Thanks for joining us here to say thank you, Jordan Harbinger.
All right. Let's see. We've got a couple of calls up there. Nik Wallenda of the Flying Will. And one does well and does or and the guys walked over the volcano last last we saw. It's going to be up in a second. Let's see. He's done. Steep incline walking up a steep oh, that's tough, yeah, 19 degree incline walking a tightrope that in going uphill, it's got to be rough. He's done the highest blindfolded walk at 500 feet, and those are both the same day in Chicago.
That's before lunch.
What has he done lately? Yeah, he's done the highest wheel of death, which is where you stand outside the wheel and the wheel spins around and he run on top of it like a dyslexic hamper. Hamster, hamster. I meant I think that's the wheel at the wheel of death is I think the guys who run outside of that big wheel on top like a log roll, but with a Ferris wheel.
Right. It's done the longest tightrope cross crossing on a bicycle, almost 250 feet in Newark, New Jersey, and the highest tightrope crossed on a bicycle is well at almost two hundred fifty feet in the Bahamas. So talk to him about his book and how he works and how he thinks. Let's get a couple one more call left.
Jeremy from Charlotte. Jeremy. Young guys, it's gone on. According to Seibold in advance, someone bring up another source subject for you, but ABC or the PAC 12 and Big Ten canceling college football this fall, just want to get your thoughts on.
The whole situation was able to play in the spring. What's going to be like without college football going to be looking at. I don't. I'm confused by this whole thing, I feel like it's not really killing young people, and I also feel like you're going to get it. I think you're going to get it. We're not talking about quarantining these guys. We're saying they can't play. I don't know. I watched my favorite show came back on the other night, hard knocks, training camp.
And the entire first episode was just dedicated to people spraying on hand sanitizer, getting their nostril swabbed. It was the most boring episode ever because it was all this. We need to distance. We need to safely distance like all the stuff we've been hearing over the last five months. That was the entire episode. And I get it. That's kind of where we're at. And I got to cover it. But it really ruined. It's like my favorite show and it ruined the first episode.
Hopefully we'll get to the action next week.
I do meetings and I spend all day on the meetings. I don't want to turn on hard knocks and watch lawyers in meetings. It was more meetings about being safe.
I don't I'm confused, but I don't know. I feel like these are some of the best, youngest, strongest guys on the planet and I don't see why we can't play. But who knows?
Yeah, I agree with who you're talking about. The 60 kids that are on scholarship who are peak athletes in their early 20s, late teens. But there's almost there's more people who are trainers and coaches and staff and just whatever who are just on on the sidelines handing them water or washing their clothes or taping them up like. Yeah, I mean, it's not just the athletes. I agree with you on, but there's a whole support staff that are not in the peak physical condition.
Well, you know, my feeling is as well, a lot of the different discounts, you know, discount cards and squirm that we look at it like it's not it's not going away.
So we have to make decisions like then that's going to have to involve some risk. And if you're a team trainer and you're 77 years old and you have some issues, you might have to sit that season out. I mean, if you're you know, if you're an old teacher, don't go back into the classroom. If you're twenty six years old, then you're strong as a horse. Then you go back in the classroom, you've got to start modifying things.
But this whole just sort of shut it down. I don't know. I feel like I feel like we're getting past it. There's maybe maybe some protocols. The death rate seems to be down and it's crazy.
As you know, we know how much these, you know, colleges rely on this income. This is one of the biggest, you know, sources I know. So the fact that these two major conferences decided this independent, you know, they want to play football. I desperately want to have that TV revenue that whatever, you know, that I agree.
I don't want to cancel the season. I know.
I wonder if the I wonder if the litigious part of our society is just so great now that if one kid died, they just the school would literally go bankrupt. Yeah. And there'd be no way there would be no possible way that if some young person died or assistant coach died or whatever, they would bring up seven thousand protocol interruptions. Or are irregularity irregularities like here's a picture of you not wearing a mask, talking to the team.
You know, there would be seven times that they would destroy them. And I think maybe that's that's it, Jeremy.
And aren't these aren't these the dominoes that are falling because like NCAA, they mandated, right.
That that you still get your scholarship if you opt out, they're not going to try and force you.
And we had Bob Costas on on Conway last night. And he reminded us, as you've talked about before, that this is sort of a domino effect because these big football teams and some of the basketball teams, that's what funds all the other sports, you know, the girls teams, tennis, golf, whatever.
So they volleyball. I can't pull off all sports. Right. So a lot of the spring sports in jeopardy because like you said, football revenue pays for the entire summer for four years.
So, yes, you're supposed to if we're on track to have a vaccine by early next year, are they just hedging their bets? And then we're just going to get an onslaught cornucopia of every sport that's ever been played in the spring?
I don't know. I football you run into you can't I mean, you can't play two seasons in eight months. I mean, yeah, that would be pretty much of a player. Safety nets in place with injuries and concussions not going to stop.
I got it. I got to tell you, you can maybe it's just because I had a few too many IPAs on a football Sunday, but I sit and I turn on that NFL network and they run games from last year and they were showing Kansas City, Jenas, Kansas City. I think we're playing God who was on last night.
I think they're playing Minnesota. Yeah, I think they're playing the Vikings. KC was three. No. Setto is two own one, for some reason, it was like it was like 13, 13 when I had no idea who won that game, I was cheering. I mean, I was kind of assuming Khedive because I had a great year, but Minnesota looked good and at some point Minnesota was up like 13 to ten and they were on the four yard line there, like driving.
I was like, score, score.
You know, I'm trying to put my cousin sound, put a few bucks down, like you can watch game, you can watch any random game from season from from week four of last year's football season. If it's not your team, like, you know, when I saw the God forbid the fucking Rams played Baltimore last year at home and just were bullied, I knew immediately when I turned that game on, the Rams got destroyed. But any close game from some two teams that you're not following in season, you know, week four, you'll have no idea who won that game.
You can what? You can enjoy it. You've literally always life. You literally can.
I had a great dad moment emancipator if that in that Rams Baltimore game. I know if you can find stuff online, but in the Rams Baltimore game, Baltimore had scored touchdowns like the first six times they touched a ball. They literally it was like thirty five to six. Yeah.
They came out of the gate so strong at the beginning of last year there's dominated and he threw a pass down the field and the tight end caught it and he looked back, kind of went over his shoulder, caught it and started, you know, took a step in the half a step and a half. The DB punched it out, the ball was loose and the Rams recovered. And I'm like, all right, well, they need that if they're going to start coming back.
And then they did the no catch ruling on the field possession long enough. Yeah. And it's like he turned around and he caught it and then he started running and then he got it punched out. I don't know why that's not a catch. I never no one can fully explain it like he didn't have it long enough. I, I don't know how long do you have to have it? He caught it. Like my feeling is, is once you catch it, it can be stripped.
If you're juggling it or you haven't caught it, then you didn't catch it. But if you catch it, it doesn't need to be a period of time. You caught the ball. I mean, we've all seen the sort of buttonhook move where the guy catches it and then goes to turn. It gets punch up. But he caught it. Look, I don't know why I don't I don't get why it's not a catch. And I always I was yelling at Sunny or Sunny.
He had to come in and watch this with me. But my rule is, if the DB was never born with the guy, still have the fucking ball. And if the answer is yes, then the DB punched it out. It was a pure punch out move. Drove me nuts. Sonny hates it because I have the remote when I can reverse it and show it again and reverse it and show it again. It took the Ranger special.
One doesn't work on my comedy specials. It's Sunny. That's his remote. Yeah. All right. Anyway, Nik Wallenda doesn't know if you can. I know NFL probably doesn't put that stuff up on the Ultranet.
Yeah, I mean, there are ways I'm trying to find the definition.
The tight end sort of turned back, caught it and then turned forward and started to run and it was punched out. I'm like, but first he caught the ball. I don't like that. It also removes exciting plays and I don't like it when you remove skilful players like the DB made a good play and punch that ball out. Also, my rams were down, I don't know, thirty five to six or something at the time. It was embarrassing, man.
All right, let's see. Let me hit it simply safe here and then we'll talk to one Nik Wallenda about facing your fears. Who knows better, simply safe. No one should feel unsafe at home, period. Fear has no place. Well, that's what that's the theme for today. People protect your home today. Get free shipping. It's simply safe dotcom slash Adam. All right. We'll take a quick break. Come back with highwire specialist Nik Wallenda right after this.