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Well, I go off on a very moving and poignant diatribe at the top of the show and then we'll get some. Stevo tells us a very interesting story about getting sober. It's been 12 years now, but harrowing story about getting sober. We'll get into that first.
I'll tell you about a job. Well, we love JB Weld. I love JB. Well, if you don't love JB, well, then I don't love you. Huh? How about that? How do you like them apples? Let's not pay the repairman. You fix it yourself with JB Weld, big or small repairs, home or garage, ordinary household glue. Well, has the word ordinary right in the title doesn't it. You need stronger.
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From Khairallah one studios in Glendale, California, this is the Adam Carolla Show, Adam's guest today, Stevo with Gina crat on news. Brian on sound effects, Dave Mason stops by and Dave Dameshek here for good sports and now warning the following show features stunts performed either by professionals or under the supervision of professionals. Accordingly, we must insist that no one attempt to recreate or reenact any stunt or activity performed on this show. Adam Corolla. Yeah. Get it on.
Got to get it on. No choice but to amend it to get it on. Thanks for tuning in and thanks for telling a friend we love that about you. Right, Gina grad. That's right. Handwoven.
Oh yeah. Music. It's so identifiable right now. It's always one. It's always weird when you hear that stuff before it's identifiable, not you. But like when you've been on that in the meetings and they're like you're there pitching music and here's what we know and you play it. And I guarantee half the people in the room go, that's lame. It sounds like a hillbilly thing. Howard, how is that dance? How's that crazy yelling at three notes?
But it's it's so it's so effective. All right. Sustiva will be in here, been sober for. Has he been sober for ten years plus. Yeah. Jesus. Here's how old we all are. Stevo has been sober for over a decade, like a guy who I just was synonymous with drunk in and out of control. It has been he's been sober essentially since my teenage kids were two years old. That's that's how long Steve O has been sober.
They've only known a sober Stevo. Yeah, I know.
I'm gonna have to bring him over and get him let urine like he he says and in his in his special he says, do you know the difference between doing this shit high and doing this shit when you have clarity and concern for your own body.
And that's a that's huge. And just so people don't misconstrue what I'm saying, I'm not going to bring Steve over and force him to get drunk. I'm going to force the booze on my kids.
So, OK, before you start with the letters M.. So I was in the process. I had thought I had I had Garagos in here an hour ago screaming Karakus is funny when he gets wound up because when he gets wound up he goes high register and he was get shrill.
He was getting pissed off about reasonable doubt, by the way, I'll be tomorrow. But he was so pissed at the city of Los Angeles. I was I was thinking about it. So Garagos is one of these you know, he's he's intellectually honest about all we can ask for. He he hates Trump and he also hates Garcetti and he also hates Newsom. He hates everyone who, in his estimation, are doing a bad job. I think he would feel that way around, probably feels that way about cocktail waitresses who are doing a bad job as well, though.
And, you know, look, you're an affront to the server industry. Well, you know, it can simultaneously be true that Trump is doing a bad job and Newsom's is doing a bad job. They can both be true. So he was all wound up because as I've said and and and what you guys need to really understand is the city and the state are always going to. Have a certain amount of hypocrisy in terms of we need the taxpayers to kind of pay their taxes on time and pay their parking tickets and get all their licenses and and permits in order.
And if the homeless guy wants to take a dump in the street, that's kind of his thing. We can't really do any. There's an element of that. Every society, it's not really avoidable. It's just when it hits a tipping point, you know, it's just when, you know, Geragos is telling me that he's got so Garagos has to deal with as he has homeless people taking over his business in downtown L.A. and he has clients on the west side on Labrada, who, when they reopen safely, their salon cops show up and arrest them.
And you see that's the tipping point of a society, right? That's that's when you take guys like Garagos who are big time taxpayers and big time job creators and you make them go, fuck it. If you guys are going to be Johnny on the spot with a taxpayer who's trying to safely reopen their business and be asleep at the wheel when the homeless guys are invading my outdoor kiosk that I've had to build, then what's in it for me? And that's what's the point.
That's kind of what I've always been talking about, which is the taxpayer versus the empty bag. Even if the empty bags are empty bag, you still have to kind of pretend like you're interested in that. And if you're only interested in people, that'll cut you a check, that's good for a little while. But eventually the check cutters move to a different state. So all of this, he was just at a high register and screaming, oh, good.
And that made me laugh. So versus their team, they don't have enough intellectual honesty to realize that two things can be true. You can hate Trump and you can hate Garcetti. They're doing a fucking horrible job. That's my team. That's your. Why do you have to ignore. I'm for somebody who says because I deal with both federal criminal justice and I'm a business owner in the city and the state. And as recently as yesterday, we had they tell us, OK, for the restaurants, a perfect example, you got to go outside.
So what do we do? I hire a guy. We we build I spend money. I have this carpenter build kind of what are planters to so that we can have outdoor dining.
What's the next thing that happens? The homeless use it as an encampment.
OK, and I tell the guy, the one homeless guy, I said, dude, you just got you've got a project room key. You've got four hotels for the luxury hotels on Fifth Avenue. Go home. You're right. They're not go back where you came from because you didn't come from the Holy Grail to me. But you live at the L.A. Grand Renfree. Plus, they'll deliver alcohol and cigarettes to you. Why are you sitting here on my table?
I said I if you're hungry, I got a meal inside, I'll give you a meal to go. But why are you sitting here when I'm trying to just keep you see those ten people, they're they're trying to stay employed. I don't need to do this. I have no desire to do this is just as easy for me to just shut it down and let everybody go on unemployment. But these guys have been with me for years. So I'm just saying deficit spend and try and keep it open.
And you're going to just plant down here because you can't walk three blocks to the free hotel room. You get up at thirteen.
Well, these guys, as far as the hotel rooms go, they like shitting alfresco.
OK, so that's a certain breed of cat likes the shit out.
They don't want if they don't like being confined in the in the bathroom, you don't feel walls closing in.
Well then explain this, because last night I didn't get awakened because at one thirty in the morning one of the future senators that's homeless on the street is broken into Teddy. And he's in the employee locker area and they've got him on the video. I said, oh, what guy breaks into the employee lockers?
There's all these kind of loaded or something and he's in the lobby area or whatever and rummaging around and mind you, the this is on the same day that LAPD calls because another patron got assaulted by a crazy woman out front who's got a knife, who literally chases people up and down 7th Street with her knife. And so they finally wanted the videotape. And I said, well, why do you I'm talking to the detective yesterday. Why do you want the videotape?
We're going to prosecute. I said, you know, I'm too excited about that. I'm not. They just somebody told me I had to because she's got a knife. I mean, that's the that's what you're dealing with.
That's what we're dealing with, Mark said something very tip. Yes. He does go into soprano, I just kind of makes me laugh, he said said something that was very telling because, as you know, I'm always just kind of looking at the signs and not really I don't need the numbers or the data to sort of see the signs, how people act and react, he said. People, women, women, he employs a fair amount of women.
Women are scared to walk in downtown now. They weren't scared to walk a couple of years ago. So the way downtown went, Los Angeles is they would have been scared in the 70s, 80s and beginning of the 90s. Then the Staples Center came in, then a lot of rehabbing buildings and building now. And then all of a sudden they walked around at night. They walked their dogs and pushed their strollers. And that at night, no more.
Now there's no more walking at night, which it's going to. It'll follow the same trajectory as Manhattan and Broadway. And it's like they were scared then. They weren't scared then they were scared. It could it can fall it falls apart faster than it's rejuvenated because the rejuvenation means high rises and staple centers and buildings and sidewalks.
And that's multi year is depends on the rejuvenation is dependent on people being a staple center and people being at downtown L.A. What's it called? The little L.A. life factory. Other all the restaurants and everything. If you're not if there's not people bustling at all Times Square area. Yeah.
And that's where we're getting to. But, you know, those empty baths are those full bags. They want to follow you now when you leave town. Oh, they're talking about taxing you for ten years after you leave.
Yeah, it's funny. Isn't that great? I was talking to Drew about that and I said obviously they know they're driving people out there. They're going to drive the Mark Geragos is of the world out. Mark Geragos doesn't need to really live in Los Angeles. He spends his life on the road anyway. He could easily live in Texas or Utah or wherever. But anyway and and I said then Drew said, I don't think they care if you leave.
And I said, oh, they care if you leave. That's why they're tacking on the ten year retroactive.
I can't believe that's legal enforceable.
They're not going to there's no way that's going to pass.
But why can't it why can't they try carrots? Why do they go right to stick. Oh leave. We're going to take your money anyway. Why not incentivize people to stay instead of threatening them to leave.
I don't know. I keep I keep trying to figure out like what is afoot. Like, I was thinking about it earlier today and I realize it's kind of our fault for being cowards.
You know, the population is sort of turned into cowards. Most people are sort of cowardly now. They sort of worry about things they shouldn't be worried about. I mean, you know, we're out of problems, official problems. We're now in a coward department and the government is just making rules depending on how what the people want. And so what people do is we watch the news. The news scares us because that's the that's the business they're in.
Then we overreact and then they make policy based on us being fearful because we're watching the news. Somebody sent me a tweet today and they were just asking Americans, like, what percentage of people that are dying of covid are under 30 and what percentage are over 50 and what and of course, they have the numbers all off. They think that there's a much higher percentage of people dying at a young age and a lower percentage of people dying like over eighty five.
Remember the very beginning? I kept saying they're not giving us the age of death. They're not giving out ages. They refuse to give out ages, or at least they weren't. And everyone else thought it was a hippie thing or something. And I was a little more. Now they're trying to steer us toward fear because obviously. Eighty seven year old dies in a nursing home. No big up young man dying, young woman dying. That's fear based.
I mean, that's going to agitate us. And so we're walking around thinking that this thing is killing younger people at a much higher rate than it is. It's like ten times higher in terms of the average person. We just ask them what the numbers are and we're downplaying the older stuff. And it's not us doing it. It's that's a more fearful scenario that is being ginned up by the news. And it's not the news is fault. The news is trying to sell shit and make money.
The politicians the news are going to do with the news are going to do they're going to give you the worst case scenario all the time with all the, you know, grim milestones and everything else that's that's in there. And if things get better, they'll say it's ticking a little bit a little bit toward the positive, but still with one hundred and twelve hundred and seventy thousand people dead. So they're going to do what they're going to do. Understand that everybody it's not a political thing they're going to do, they're going to scare you.
That's what the news does. I mean, you know, we're getting worked up about murder hornets for 10 minutes, for Christ's sake, because somebody found a Hornet. So, OK, they're going to do what they're going to do. The politicians are going to act based on essentially how scared or scared that the constituency is. We're California. We're world class pussies. We're all scared shitless. Everyone hears a narcissist. So we get fucking locked down and shut down more so than than anyone else.
And it's our fault for being cowards. That's it. We're cowards. We act like cowards. And, you know, Dr. Drew goes on Twitter and says it's not as bad as people think it is. And we got to fucking shut that guy down. Cowards, everyone, everyone who disagrees with something, everyone says we got to reopen a business or something that these people need to be shouted out of the room. We're cowards. People don't get that.
We're turning into cowards. And it's not serving us. It's agitating us. It's making us unhappy. And by the way, it's ruining businesses and economies. We shouldn't be such cowards. Everyone should really think about what that is, what that means, what this country was built on, where people came from to get to this country and try to reel in the cowardly part a little bit, because CNN and the news are not going to let up with the scare.
And Garcetti and Gavin Newsom are not going to let up in the post department. They're going to just they're just going to dance to the tune of the cowards. But if we want to be cowards, then we deserve what we get. So please, people try to get your fucking shit together with you a little bit. Stop being pussies. All right. Dave Mason is on the line. It's firing my inspirational speech. Jesus Christ. It's scary how many people turn in a fucking full blown cowards.
I mean, I've been seeing it coming for a long time, but. Oh, anyway, don't blame the politicians.
Don't blame CNN. Go find a mirror and figure out how you turn into such a world class pussy and then let's see if we can solve some of these problems. Dave, are you on?
I'm on. How do I sound? You sound like a coward now. Oh, wow.
Now you sound good night. So sports re-opening, things are getting back going. I mean, there's NBA's kind of kind of fun watching from the bubble.
I haven't. I haven't. I don't mind it that much. I don't know. Dave Ryan, you guys watch sports. What do you Dave, what do you think? Watching NBA playoffs from the bubble. I like you know, the action is great, I mean, it's it's I think they did a pretty good job with it actually looks a lot better than I thought it would. I thought I was going to head that high school gym feel to it.
But, you know, you watches it looks what's pretty good.
It almost looks like you're watching the game in front of fans, you know, the sound and everything. So I'm pleasantly surprised by it. And once again, the action has been great on it. So. So, no, no complaints there. People have been chomping at the bit the last few months to get some action down and then they're back in full force. So we love it.
Do I don't think it's hurt the UFC. From what I can see, the UFC feels fine. I mean, watching it, I don't baseball feels a little weird because this is big, empty stadiums. I don't know what football's going to feel like. NASCAR feels kind of fine. I don't know. Brian, what do you think?
I watched I so I haven't watched a single second of basketball partially because of the Warriors are not playing this year in the playoffs and partially because it feels weird.
But I do watch a lot of baseball and there is the crowd noise piped in. And maybe this is the sound effects guy speaking very specifically as as hard as they're trying to do the sound effects of the crowd. They're not timing it. Right.
They're not getting like like they should be booing when the and the pitcher throws over the first to the third, the visiting pitcher, the crowd noise should escalate or rise based on hits and extra base hits and stolen bases. But they're not doing it. It's just fucking crowd noise that occasionally gets a little louder. It's more distracting than who was empty.
It was funny. I was I someone sent me a tweet like he said, Trump's golfing when he should have been thrown out the first pitch at the Yankees game. And I was like, he probably just didn't want to hear the sound effects guy playing the boos, you know, sound effects guys like, hey, I'm just doing my job.
You know, when the pitcher when a pitcher wipes off too many, too many signals, eventually I have to hit the BU.
But now when the catcher comes out to talk on the mound, I hit the bottom. When Trump gets out, they're going to hit the pool.
Yeah, you're simulating real life.
So, Dave Latha, what is your scene been like at bat online? Like, is it a lot of pent up, a lot of pent up action and now it's all kind of getting released on the basketball playoffs? Yeah, absolutely.
I mean, it was a challenging few months for everybody, you know, either casino numbers or through the roof. Our pocket numbers are through the roof and we are grinding on on the sports scene. But now that they're back, I mean, players are just coming back in full force. I mean, even the sporting events that were going on during that down months, like those UFC cards were just I mean, we're setting record numbers at that Masvidal car that was by far the biggest that card we've ever done here at online.
So, yeah, I mean, a baseball action is a great NHL action is great. NBA is awesome. These golf tournaments are through the roof. And, you know, NFLs, what, three weeks? About three weeks. The NFL starts college football.
We'll see. But as long as we have NFL, well, we'll be rocking and rolling.
Yeah. You know, the only problem with the covid-19 in the NFL, for me, traditionally best time the season. There's two reasons I love the NFL beginning. I love hanging out and watching the games with the usual suspects. And it usually marks the end of the summer in the summer always goes out with a big flurry of heat. You know, there's just big it's always like, oh, man, it's September, so how can be so hot?
And then it starts to cool off and then you grab an IPA and you watch the game and it's that's a great feeling to it. And but here's the problem this year with the covid-19. Normally when we get to the end of the summer, pre NFL season, I'm usually at my lightest weight anticipation of packing on the weight for the NFL. I always pack on fifteen pounds of the C hibernating for the winter. Yeah, yeah. You know, it's hot in and out of the pool.
You just you're just your little leaner at the end of the summer. And then the NFL hits and the hot wings and the pizza and the IPAs and then we always pack on fifteen pounds. Now I'm heavy going into the foot in the kickoff of the football season, so I may be morbidly obese now at the end of the NFL season. And that's that's that's an issue. Hey, Dave, you know, what time is it?
Wherever you're at? I'm curious.
And then Brian, I'm on I'm on Mountain Time, so I guess that's, what, an hour. Yeah. Oh, that's it, huh?
Oh, I didn't know that almost at afternoon nap time was to go. Oh, sorry. Brian. Yes. Yeah.
Dave, you're a betting guy. What what odds would you give. I guess it's a it's a question you can answer in parts. Well what else would you give for like a full college football season happening? Partially like, you know, just the U.S. and maybe, I don't know, the EC playing or it was bonuses, and if you had to, you know, maybe Ichabod's to those or no outcome that I know of. Yeah.
I mean, you know, some some in the PAC 12, they worry that they're not playing, you know, big and they're not playing. A couple of kids might try to play, but it's a mess. We had those odds up and down. We actually put the week one up yesterday. They're planning on going forward. But I mean, it's it's I think a start. But I put it a coin flip.
If they actually finish, I mean, I'm going to say, what do you think about the season getting canceled midway through the reason I bring it up, Notre Dame today announced that five kids test positive today for Kelvin.
And it's such Adam, to your point, it's such a different ecosystem. You know, college versus pros, pros. You can kind of Bob, you guys are responsible. They're adults. They have homes. These kids are all living together in college, you know, amongst other students, ostensibly schools to go back unless they're not getting paid to.
And that's that's the thing. I mean. Well, yeah, they're not getting paid. But, yes, these are these are well, you know, some guys are paid, but it's not like their profession yet. So it's a mess, man. I mean, you know, it's been a mess for months. The change in rules. And, you know, you have these the MLB announcers are going from 10 to 16 teams in a playoff the day of the season.
I mean, you know, we have to make the playoffs. Yes. No on the site now. It's like, well, these guys, we've got to blown the prick up because, I mean, they've gone from 10 to 16 and the odds are based on ten teams. So it's been like that nonstop. So, you know, we're trying to do is just make sure the hoardings as tight as possible. I mean, we're putting highs, but, yeah, it's back up now.
Is there even going to be a Heisman? You know, you've got to take PAC 12 guys off now. What are we doing with the wagers that we're better on PAC 12 players and better every day, the frickin headache or whatever?
I'm glad you reminded me that, because one thing I wanted to ask you next time we talked was it was a big news in the preseason about spring training. When it was going on. There was a prop that I think you guys were hosting about how many Houston Astros would have got hit by a pitch this year. Are you still honoring that better?
You know, I mean, we know that, you know, that's just a prime example. It's just, you know, we had an ax to that. And, you know, we have people pitching. Oh, I bet the owners like getting on with it. That's based on one hundred and sixty two games, not six, for God sakes. You know what I mean. So, you know, but, you know, we've been generous on stuff too, like the NBA and NHL divisions.
How we graded those was we graded the winners of each of it like the NHL. David have an official winner divisions, but we graded the leader of the regular season and whatever team was leading those four divisions as a winner. And we know X and everybody else, and we actually ended up doing the same for NBA as well, even though they did technically have a divisional winner. So, you know, we're trying to be as generous as possible.
And some of the gray areas stuff, you know, we graded both sides winners on stuff, you know, winners and no action on the losers and all that crap. But, you know, if it's black, there's this no argument, you know what I mean?
It's it's it's fair. If you're if you're bitching about that, you're just taking a shot. And you can you can. The door's over there if you don't want to better.
The door's over there. Hey, Dave Mason, thanks for joining us. Appreciate it. We'll be checking in soon. Curious about we'll get into maybe presidential stuff next time we speak. Oh, I can't wait, wait, wait.
Thanks, Dana Bash. And take care.
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And you can visit BÊTE online dot org. So exclusive partner podcast on Don't Forget, use the promo code podcast one for your free sign up bonus today. Bet online, your online sportsbook experts. All right. Other things I was wanting to get into Steve. I was going to be in here in a second. I had a. And Bill Maher clip, I wanted to play that Denzel clip, I wanted to play a Komala clip, I want to play I first I thought.
Kamala, my saying, Kamala, Kamala, Kamala, the wrestler, the giant wrestler, the Kamala got, she she delivered her entire speech without a hiccup.
I'm always impressed. I'm impressed at people who and the Obamas did that as well. I'm impressed by people's ability to just stand there and mow through 17 pages of dialogue on their feet with out so much as a weird swallow or an brath or outbreath or whatever. It is impressive. And I'm coming from a I'm coming from a place of a guy who doesn't read very well. So for me, I'm super impressed by it. But it's it's pretty amazing that these people who you know, they're politicians and they're, you know, the kind of celebrities, but they're not really spokespeople, you know what I mean?
They just get in there and just murder that teleprompter just so freakin polished.
And I thought of you when I was watching her because, you know, there was Maya Rudolph had been doing her, you know, and that was all happening that Maya Rudolph does a really good Kamala Harris.
No, Kamala Harris does a really good Maya Rudolph. They sound exactly the same.
I know they sounded exactly the same. They speak from a part of their throat. That's a deep part. That Deep Throat part, I don't know. I don't have any training. I don't know how to say it. But the voice is an up front. It's back. Yeah. Yeah, you're right.
Yeah. So someone on Twitter addressed this exact same thing. Claris speaking to no one, basically. I mean, I have people like. Yeah, she's used to it. The senator go and it's always empty. Yeah.
So I was also thinking like as I was driving in, I was thinking. There's a there's it's all a wiring thing, I guess it's a wiring thing, so I thought Obama is so poised and his so sorted and smooth the delivery is is flawless. I mean, it's got so much style to it. It doesn't it doesn't have substance to it in my mind. I never know what he's talking about. He's saying a lot of real important stuff, but it never really has any specifics to it.
It's just we're better. We're stronger. We need to come together.
It's all platitudes, but it's delivered in this crazy. It's so and a super attractive way. Right. He's a master order and his wife's exact same way. She's just talking pure platitudes, but in a masterful way. And I thought it's so attractive to some people or to many people. And then I started thinking about what would be like who would be the opposite. And then I thought, oh, Jordan Peterson would be the opposite of a Barack Obama.
Jordan Peterson says everything and a very horrible way like and it is just in a way that's not an attractive people as well. Yeah. You look at him.
I mean, I've interviewed him. I know him. He's in our movie and stuff like that.
He he has the most substance in the least attractive delivery system. You know what I'm saying? Now, if you're wired like me, I don't really care what the package is. I just want what's in the package. Right. But so many and I've had this discussion. I'm just I'm in a way, I'm a lot the same way, which is like, oh, it's not what you're saying, it's how you're saying it, you know, or whatever that is.
And I can't make heads or tails of what Michelle Obama saying, but it's delivered in the best way ever, which is super attractive to a large group of society, a larger group of society than Jordan Peterson. Jordan Peterson says things that sort of off he's sort of Off-putting, but everything he says is statistically there, you know. Yes.
And and like the macro and micro, if you ask somebody afterwards, what did you think about Obama's speech, he'd say it was beautiful. It was masterful. I was, you know, the charm. I was swept up. What did he say?
And I can tell you we're good. Right.
And I can tell you, working in a newsroom while this was playing live, trying to get sound bites, it was very difficult because exactly the point you're making, where do you what do you highlight? What do you stop down on in future? Because no one's really saying anything.
So to find a ten, twelve second clip was actually a little difficult, but delivered with style points through the roof. And then I really realized living in Hollywood, in Los Angeles and how, you know, Obama is the toast of the town. I mean, you can talk George Clooney or Brad Pitt all you want, but the biggest celebrity in Hollywood would be the Obamas, right? I mean, they would be smart. They'd be if anyone said, we're going to throw a dinner party, you can't have Brad Pitt or you can't have George Clooney and Obama.
You could you could have Obama or you could have Clooney, but you can't have Obama. I think everyone needs to say Obama. I think they would see Brad.
So and I've been to parties with George Clooney, Clooney and those their ilk. And it's like it's cool. But if Obama was there, it really be. All right. So then what is it? And they don't have that feeling about Jordan Peterson, obviously. So I realize the style and the aesthetic and the whatever the invisible part of being human is that thing that that just drips. He exudes that Los Angeles effortless charm or.
Yes, Hollywood is all about that, that the greatest quality you have is effortless. He's got it. He's got it. You know what I mean? And it doesn't really matter. You know, acting chops are good and everything is good, but being having it is pretty damn awesome. And the Obamas have it. That's that's where God damn sure, I don't know. I've no idea what they're saying. I really don't I do physically know what they're saying.
They're talking about being stronger and being together and being united and and facing fear and having the courage to come together and face fear. But I don't know what any of it I don't know the practical application for it. Like they'd be the worst football coaches in the world because there's no there's no X's and O's. It's just all about the hustle and hard work and and all that.
Well, you know who called that out from the beginning? Sarah Palin. Hmm.
Oh, it's all hope changes. Not seeing anything. It's all holby changey hope and change.
Sarah. She nailed it. Yeah.
Oh, yeah. Oh. How is that whole thing, changey stuff going for you.
How's a little Turlock doing. Turlock, cuffy, what do you have, a kid with a Wernham trigger, a trigger doing? Thank you. How trigger is a blessing and every day is a gift. And I don't know what they're saying in the magazines because I don't read magazines.
But I can tell you at our house the first dude and trigger in everyone is a real great oh, without this for clarity, it's trig track, Willow, Bristol and Piper. I mean, obviously, you know that I'm saying we're very short for a trigger. Oh, yeah. Yep. Now, just to be clear, I please take this in spirit in which it's intended. Oh, boy, you don't read magazines because you don't care to read magazines or because you can't.
Oh, dear. You know, I'm just I'm just asking.
So I have a state to run. What do you run besides around the block, young man? I got there.
Oh, sick burn. Burn. Right. Can you see Russia from where you're sitting? Not right now. But if I open the curtains, I'll get a good look and I'll turn this computer right around so you can see Russia from my house. I'd like to I was supposed to do some gigs in Alaska.
We're supposed to go out like salmon fishing and go to a lot of the red carpet for you.
Out of girl up. Yeah, we were up. My son was pumped. We're going to go see some bears and see some salmon and do some stand up and stay in a cabin.
Oh, yeah, we do. Come on down. We'd love to have shut everything down because of the cove. It you know. Well, we have ways around that. Oh you do.
Oh you know, so I know I am not the one I want to sell one. Oh OK. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry but I will send a helicopter plane to get ya. I will send one of those boat planes, you know, on the bottom of the plane, that sea plane. Thank you very much. And you will be our guest of honor. We'll show you how the salmon swim upstream. It'll be all hot. Well, I'll come on out. I promise not to bring any magazines where you can.
You can bring them. I just won't read them.
Yeah, I just look at the pictures anyway. Sarah Palin. But the clip I got was from, again, that the problem you know, the problem is between Michelle Obama, Barack Obama and Kamala Harris. Biden's going to have a hard time keeping up in the speech department because, yeah, it was kind of keep it quiet.
Keep it short. You mean a speech or actually speaking a department? Like I said, when I was in front of Congress and I found out Ben Shapiro was going ahead of me and I was going next, I was like, no, no, this is like the best student ever going up to the chalkboard.
And then you follow them up with a low like Jimi Hendrix opening for The Monkees, right? Yeah, I was like, yeah.
And I mean, a lot of it is, you know, you have to compare it to that. Kind of went before you. The bar's high.
But isn't that what people are doing? Wasn't that the whole the whole thing people were saying was, well, we just need to know who he picks for VP because there's a good chance it put me in coach if anything goes wrong.
I was going to say, if we like Comilla, then it does. It's it's fine.
I was going to ask Dave, I don't know, maybe maybe Brian can check on his phone or his computer, but there's got to be what's on Comilla being president, right? I mean. Yup, yup.
That has to be I mean so you break it down. The odds are better than fifty fifty on Obama. On Biden being president. I'm guessing you get a little better than fifty.
Oh good. Yeah. You guys can guess. Right. I'm just tell you, I will say that. Well first Biden has to become president obviously so that's probably one twenty.
These are odds to win the election this election. Then I'll give odds on becoming president.
Oh OK. So he decides to win this election by has got to be one thirty. Easy, Ryan. One for one thirty.
Exactly. Well, that is one thing. It's funny because I've been following the odds and they've been increasing in Trump's favor. I wonder if if a lot of money came in on Biden at first or in recent elections recently. But Trump has even money. One plus one hundred.
Kamala Harris to win the presidency is only is fifty to one oh to the second.
Joe might drop out or something to happen in the next couple of months, but to become president after Joe becomes president to step back, there are no odds on that because that's like a four year bet, you know what I mean?
You have to hold that bet for four years. Yeah. Or nine months, like, depending on what happened, but potentially for years.
But as long as for hey, random question, I have no idea. I would assume. No, but I don't know when you think. Of course, it's Biden, Harris, Trump, Pence, has there ever been a president, a sitting president who's running for re-election, who swapped out their vice president?
I just heard this. I just heard this trivia. Oh, wow. Nikki Haley has odd's, by the way, on winning the presidency is 250 to one.
By hearing that, Brian, you mean it's probably has happened?
I think swapping out, swapping pants anymore, grabbing a new running mate as the sitting president.
Oh, yeah. So you don't have to announce during your convention your vice president if he's already the vice president. Right. Right.
I'm just saying I wonder, has it ever happened like I want to run and I want to be president again, but I don't wear pants or I want my vice president.
I want to step out for a new vice? I don't know. I wish I knew more about president.
I think what I heard was, was Bush maybe on the verge of replacing Quayle? There are some. So I read some story in the last like ten days.
I forgot all about forgot all the Quayle jokes. All right, here's a clip. I got the Comilla doing. It's right. It's pretty sure it's about 20 seconds.
But this is in the I've realized I'm also I'm doomed because we have become a feelings based society and I'm not a feelings based person. I'm not sure.
Yeah, well, let's ask Natalia first. Right.
So I'm getting the brunt of this because I'm I'm Mr. Logical, or at least I attempt to be. But I'm I am at a deficit in the feelings department and our society's becoming a feelings based society. Every almost every speech I heard at the DNC was just feelings. All right. Let's let's I will play her clip. Go ahead.
Maxo pada this virus, it has no eyes and yet it knows exactly how we see each other and how we treat each other. And let's be clear, there is no vaccine for racism. No, it's true.
It's true right now. You can't argue. I don't know. I'm like school choice. I want to talk about school choice. That's not my thing. But. All right.
So an observation I had based on the Jordan Peterson, let's just say Vesuvio, you know, Kamala Harris or even Donald Trump, like they're politicians and he's not because they have, like you said, that it's doctor. I may not subscribe and, you know, feel Donald Trump's it factor, but he clearly has it for millions of people, you know what I mean? He connects on up on an emotional level, you know, build the wall.
There's only a plan. But it makes sense to a lot of people.
Yeah, it's a different kind of it. It's a kind of like we're going to take this. We're going to you know, we're going to we're going to take this group and we're going to charged amount. We're going to defeat the Nazis like it's that kind of rally and rally politician versus feelings politician.
But it's still an emotional thing and action and.
Yeah, and sadly, I want some version of Jordan Peterson running everything because I want him just to look at the numbers, figure it out and say what you should do and what you shouldn't do. And we're show feelings late now that it's impossible. Yes. Sorry.
I thought of a better an example not to deal with. No more substantive message. Let a less attractive package.
Stephen Hawking. Stephen Hawking.
Well, yeah, no, I, you know, I was thinking, as you're saying it feeblest. I think Jordan's better. But I mean, you know, Bill Belichick, you know, I mean, it's just like, hey, we take the best players, we cut the other players and nobody's beyond being cut. And we just put the strategy together. And I'm not here to have a big press conferences. We're just going to go win.
The Herm Edwards would be a better politician than our criminal genius.
And, you know, we know what her name is, right?
We're risk of even remotely attempting this conversation with you, too.
Darryl Stutter Sutter from the Kings, Darryl Sutter from the Sutter, the the coach of the Kings when communist sports. Gina, no charm, but like.
Yup. Well, I guess we're going to have to win then. Which king?
Sorry, hockey guys. Yeah, the hockey game. Oh, sorry. Sorry.
Oh if you got. I got to watch. I got to find that guy. I'm not a hockey is another sport that to me is suffering with no audience. It doesn't aesthetically it seems weird. I didn't know that.
Yeah. I didn't know the audience was as big a part as it was in hockey. But it is those people standing up and leaning against the Lexan was kind of nice. All right. I got to.
That's him. Darryl. Yeah, I didn't know. I got to play a very good clip that I heard of Denzel Washington about. Right. Coming off, coming off the Kamala Harris clip, and it's you know, he says what I say, except for he's black and people like him. So I think it's going to be better for you guys. But it's I think Denzel gets the the only cure to systemic racism is. Go ahead, Denzel.
As opposed to minorities. You think we've made any headway? And I think it's more important to make headway in our own house. By the time the system comes into play, the damage is done. They're not locking up seven year olds. Yeah, you know, I was in Chicago a couple of three or four weeks ago and we saw these little kids on bikes with masks on the side of the head, like five or six in the driver's seat.
You had a little yummies. I said, who said yummies? Look up Google. Little yummy. Yummy was 11 year old murderer.
Well, and you look at his picture, you see the head shot up and he's like this. And he got murdered at 11 by a 14 year old. Wow. Who's doing life now? And a 16 year old. That makes no sense. You blame the system. Where was his father? It started in the house. It starts in the home. And yeah, well, my father got locked up. Where was his father? Yeah.
You know, like, I did talk about my three closest friends and they did, you know, fifteen to twenty five. One day. Twenty eight. Isn't that I was the only one in three that had a father in my life, even though my parents were together. But I still had a father who was a gentleman and a good example and they didn't.
We can blame the system if we want but they didn't like any of us up at seven.
Yeah, we were all doing enough to get locked up at 13. My parents sent me in another direction. They didn't have anybody to help them and they kept doing what they was doing and the system got them.
So I don't the system is rigged. But why all the more reason not to help it go, buddy?
I don't know. You think you're going to fix this thing with more, I don't know, counselors or cops or politicians? You think you're going to fix these problems from the outside? It's fucking insane. I think. I think we've been on it for about fifty years. I don't I don't see much change going on. There's always there's always a new promise. Yeah. Yeah.
In the ghetto, there's always a promise in the ghetto is 50 years old. I mean it's and I'm.
Forty seven years old are forty anymore.
Yeah. But look, if Elvis was singing about this shit in the 60s, I'd say there was an issue with it. Somebody I don't know. Kris Kristofferson. I'm a Mac Davis. Mac Davis wrote the song, oh, 1969. All right.
So during while the Vietnam War, while we're at the height of the Vietnam War, a white guy named Mac Davis was writing the song that Elvis was recording before all you were born, except for me and Dawson or maybe just me trying to figure out the Diana point. Is this somebody, the biggest entertainer in the world at the time, thought I should write a song about what's going on in the ghetto. And it wasn't the kind of thing that he had to explain or qualify.
People understood that the young kid was born and his dad left the house and the kid got into trouble and then the kid got shot. All the stuff we're hearing about now was all laid out.
He reached a point where it was worthy of a song. I mean, otherwise, obviously he's using like, does this happen?
Yeah. And and it and it wasn't a song that needed to be explained. Yes. It reached a point where we wrote a song about it and then people understood, like when they when they wrote the song, everybody was Kung Fu Fighting. No one won. What's Kung Fu. No, we reckon that we were two different songs, but the same point remains. Carl Douglas, Kung Fu Fighting. He wrote a song. Everybody was Kung Fu Fighting.
None of those cars were fast as lightning. And that, in fact, was a little bit frightening. But they did it with expert timing that, you know, Kung Fu Fighting by Carl Douglas.
Yes, of course. Not that well. Oh, China.
Poor young guy. I mean, I don't I don't know all the words naive, young, young, naive, Kansas, native, young, young, young, naive.
Here's a song by a gay guy.
Can I tell you when I when I pulled up the LAGOONA sake with Sonny and Matty Andrea in the car, we're going through the gate, you're going to go drive up the hill to get up to LAGOONA second go through the gate. The song One Night in Bangkok came on the hard and I cried. I cranked it up and I just had Sunny, where we may be going to the straightest place in the land, but we have the gayest song ever.
This there's no gay or song than this song. When it goes, I get my kicks above the sun, all right. I get my kicks above the waistline. Sunshine. I was like, Sunny, this is the gayest song you're ever going to hear. And we cranked it up as we drove onto that track now.
So if Elvis was to write a song that meant there was a saturation point and if Carl Douglas was going to write a song about kung fu fighting, that meant everyone knew what kung fu was and everyone knew what this situation was with the ghetto and the inner city young black boys being shot. All right. That was 1969. The Vietnam War was in full swing. And now we're going to fix racism, everybody. We're going to fix systemic racism by reimagining a whole bunch of shit.
Well, I don't know. I'm kind of with Denzel Washington on this, which is how the fuck are you going to fix the system if no one's parenting and these kids are getting out into the system? All right. That's just me. Unpopular. Not nearly. Yes.
This is good and helpful because next time you go on one of your racist rants about fathers education, which land Denzel doing it and all of that, I hold on to Denzel.
Now, I would argue that as eloquent as Michelle Obama is, she doesn't have an answer for this and Denzel does. But no one wants to hear Denzel approach to this problem, and that's sad.
But although Denzel is pretty damn charming, he's pretty damn charming. But this message is not it's not getting out there. All right. Do you have Kung Fu fighting? I'm getting it. Come on, man.
While he's there, by the way, I'm right. Hey, Chris. Yeah.
People like that song through fighting. It's participatory, participatory. It's the people participating in it. It's fun.
It's finger popping music.
You know, people go out to have a good time, you know, that's what you said because because Chris is Asian ish, he won't get in trouble for singing.
That's right. And with all this covid and whatnot, people really want to enjoy themselves when they go out, finally go out. And if you guys you guys could cover song like Kung Fu Fighting.
I think the audience would appreciate, you know what I mean, huh? Oh. I miss the casual racism of the 70s doesn't play for me. I know this a black guy singing about kung fu fighting and they did the.
No, no, no. Yep. Oh. Oh. Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho. I like when guys are just cash in on whatever was going on right now. Everybody was fighting how fast it's like this. I do like this stuff. That's not a bad sign. Oh, look for the board with expert timing. Shine a man down, down, down. Yeah, I can't sing this, I'm going to lay down.
Anyone can sing Chinese songs and everyone does their part. Yeah, I'm gonna sing. You know, I feel sorry for Dawson pat down. You know, this Carl Douglas took one hit Wonder Guy. Whatever came in, you know, there's some sixty three year old session musician who played with Sinatra and all the greats and Count Basie. And it's like, hey, we're doing it just like it's we're doing Kung Fu Fighting. Lay down the bass line and bring your jazz.
You fucking kidding me? Keep my fucking name off this goddamn record. Because these must have just been about your session, guys, because Carl Douglas was just a dude, I guess. So what happened was after having spent over two hours recording the side of his record and then taking a break, Kung Fu Fighting was recorded quickly in the last ten minutes of studio time and only two takes.
Wow, this guy's a genius and we haven't heard more from him.
That's why he had to go over the top with the husband has and the chopping sounds. How come he's not addressing the UFC and mixed martial arts? I feel like that should be his next song.
Hey, and the Great Mount Rushmore of black artists doing Native American songs. Let's not forget Apache.
Sugarhill Gang. Oh, yeah, boy.
Put up those lyrics for Adam because they are just they they just Googled words that that remind you of Native American things and just threw them in a song.
The OJ on it kimosabe. Jump on it Custer. Jump on it. Apache.
Yeah. Used to be Asians and American Indians were always fair game in terms of appropriation and making fun of. And now sadly, we've come to a place we've evolved to a place where you can't even make fun of Asians in America and indigenous people. All right. Let me hit features here. Change in your socks, man, can make a huge difference. Ass ball. Bryan asked me if we're taking walks or you're hitting the links. It is a different man.
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Like if whatever you're golfing, if you're walking, if you're hiking, if you're riding, whatever, get a good shoe will get a good sock that that goes between your foot in the shoe. See the math I did. There's a lifetime guarantee. If you're unsatisfied at any point, they'll give you a replacement pair. No questions asked, proudly made. By the way, in North Carolina, it's a family owned business and they make them in North Carolina.
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Well, Steve. Oh.
Oh, that that oh, terror, terror, terror, Steve oh is got to stand special, and he's been sober for a long time and we're going to talk to him about everything right after this.
It's time to check Adam's voice mail. Men get it out, and then I remember a while back ago, you had a colonoscopy and had some thought on the nurse thing to you, oh, is this your first rodeo? Well, I'm calling because I think I got your beat. And I'd like to hear your thoughts on this one. I just had a colonoscopy a couple of days ago, and when they rolled me into the operating room, the nurse said to me, this is where the magic happens.
It at all meant you can leave us a message at eight eight eight six three four one seven four four.
Oh, it is Stevo in studio. Good to see you, Steve. Yeah, good to see you too, Adam.
Yeah, time is going to be time for you to get a colonoscopy pretty soon.
Yeah, I've actually got a plan for that. What does that mean? You have a plan for that?
Well, I mean, I, I want to ask the doctor during the colonoscopy how much he thinks I can really fit in there. If I was trying to, like, you know, reach my maximum potential, I predict that he's going to say, oh, you don't want to do that. You know, you don't want to try.
And well, how much of what can you fit in there? Well, I don't know.
I thought maybe I could take an assault rifle off the streets, melted down into something and get the whole thing up there. Hmm.
I'm not a physician, but I I've. Well, first off, they give you the Propofol.
I think I think they do the Michael Jackson stuff. Like, by the way, you say whatever you want about Michael Jackson taking that Propofol. Once you take that Propofol, you go, oh, I get it. I could get used to this shit for sure.
And interesting that I've had all these surgeries, all these procedures since I got sober. So I don't even really think it's a big deal. I had an idea for my new tour to be administered general anesthesia, drugs while I was riding a bicycle. And and so we did we did a bunch of research. We reached out to anesthesiologist. They said, watch out for Propofol because there's an epidemic of people who have access to it. Rampantly abusing it, for the reasons you just pointed out, feels great.
Yeah, they said. But there's another drug called Etomidate, which works very similarly, which makes you nauseous, makes you barf. It burns going in your veins super unpleasant. Nobody would ever use it for fun.
So so I did that one and I was well getting a special the second.
But how is sobriety like a lot of guys about in sobriety, they have a dental procedure or something and then they're prescribed painkillers and then they don't want to take the painkillers because they're. Grober, how about you?
How's to say I have not had a painkiller. I haven't filled out a single prescription for a painkiller since I got sober. So the painkillers that I have had since I got sober are strictly what's been administered to me by doctors. And in the hospital, you know, professional situations like I had open reduction surgery on my ankle where they put everything together. I shattered the thing and I had eleven screws and a plate. That was the most invasive surgery that I've had.
And I got through all of the aftermath of it with Tylenol and Advil.
I was marveling at the beginning of the show that you've been sober for over a decade. Yeah. Which to me feels it's incredible passage of time thing because I feel like Stevo. Yes. Survivor. Yeah. What's it been four years like. It doesn't feel like over.
Well, I turned twelve on March 10th. Congratulations. Yeah. Thank you man. I appreciate it. Dude, I think Drew had something to do with that and Johnny Knoxville had something to do with that. Absolutely. Yeah.
Out of Steve has come a long way actually if I remember correctly, Steve, in the first Jackass movie, the one stunt you refused to do was taking the car because you had some sort of like your dad to get upset or something. Right now you're going for assault rifles.
This is a big step, but it doesn't have to be an assault rifle. That was just the first thing that came to mind. You know, take somebody off the streets.
But yeah. And it was the one thing I ever backed out of was the idea was to put a toy car like a matchbox car right up your butt. And then you go to the hospital complaining of, you know, I'm sorry, but and then they take an X-ray and the X-ray shows a car up there and it's genius. And it worked out.
It was a great scene. Like don't tell anyone. He knows that's too much. Yeah.
And and of course, I backed out. It was it was our brother, Ryan Dunn, who did that. And, you know, sadly, we lost Ryan and we're nine years ago now and we went into production for Jack. As for if you can believe it at this age, there they you know, and Paramount announced the movie. Everything we read, we got into production. We managed to film for one week before it got shut down by the coronavirus.
And in that one week, I just decided that, you know, Ryan put that toy car up his butt for me and, you know, now he's not here. I want to, like, do this for him. A tribute. Yeah, I want to really.
And I tell the director going into it, I said, my asshole is your asshole.
But he got that. Yeah, you can do whatever you want, you know. And it turned out that, like in the early days of Jackass that that got me off the hook.
It made my asshole less interesting to them that I want to offer it up.
You know, I was I was picturing a sort of Pulp Fiction Christopher Walken type situation with the watch, you know what I mean?
Memory. He gave a speech about the war. Yeah, but you're kind of doing that with the Matchbox car and your fallen brother isn't with us anymore.
But as a as a commemorate his life, you're going to put Hot Wheels up your ass.
Well, I want to really take it up a notch. It's going to be whatever it is going to be considerably larger than a matchbox car, I would imagine.
And so you guys are doing four or you got a week and a four and we're looking at it.
Yeah, it was it was a real blessing that we got that one, because I think there's obvious question marks around whether it's a good idea for us to be filming a new Jackass movie at this stage in our lives. And what we demonstrated in that first week was that that not only is it working, but everything worked fantastically well. And apparently for Paramount, our Jackass four has really made it up the list of their priorities. So, you know, if movie theaters still exist after this pandemic, then then likely will be in them.
The I it's fun coming up with the stuff, right. Because there's this weird balance. When I used to do the man show and Jimmy and I would sit around, we would have to kind of come up with stuff wasn't jackass stuff, but we had like the Wheel of Destiny.
And if you landed on a good slot, you could take a bath with a Juggy and if you landed on a bad spot, Adam would pee on your wallet or he'd have to do a bong load of Adam's pubes or whatever. It was kind of jackass stuff. And there's this kind of thing of like, what were the legal department let us do, what will work, what won't work, what sounds good but isn't really going to be good. Like we'd have ones.
We're like, it's funny. Like Daniel would go, we're going to hook this guy's underwear up to an industrial crane and we're going to hang him and give a giant wedgie by his underwear and he'll be hanging, flailing from his underwear. And I'd be like, Daniel, if you start lifting up the guy's underwear and he's standing there, it's just going to tear the underwear and just go up and he'll just be standing there. He's not going to be dangling and flailing about from his underpants.
We've had better luck with that. You have? Yeah. We have the first movie. We had a guy jump out of a tree attached with cords attached to his underwear. And I think that might have broken, but we've since perfected atomic wedgie. And the ultimate wedge is for sure.
Yeah, Max has got some bad, but it was fun kind of sitting around and just thinking of stupid stuff and how how it would visually play out.
And in a way, I think the the straightest forward stuff was always the easy. It was always the most satisfying. Like Adam pees on your wallet was the best.
It's just the guy lost his wallet, went right in a toilet. I just turned around on stage and started whizzing all over. The guy's wall is as straightforward as it could get, but satisfying.
Absolutely. And 100 percent right. Sometimes things don't work, you think? Well, sometimes things that aren't that great don't don't seem that great, are epic.
I had one that I did where this was an idea I was sitting on for the longest time, that if I go skydiving, that, you know, the first time you have the tandem instructor strapped to your back. So I thought, OK, this is great, I'm going skydiving for my first time and I'll be butt naked with the guys strapped on my back and I'll be furiously jacking off. So I'll actually time it as I'm falling out of the plane.
I'm just coming everywhere and there are so many layers to it, you know. Yeah, it's nuanced. Yeah. Finding a company that would let us do it. The guy who was willing to be strapped to my back, the logistics of getting the job done in an airplane full of dudes pointing cameras at you. I mean, there are a lot going on. And yeah, I'm. He's thrilled that I pulled that off and it was one of those ones, man, fairly simple, you know, it came out exactly the way I pictured it.
I I want to say that that what people so when I was in high school, all mean my friends did is torture each other and everyone thought it was homo erotic. But what people don't really understand is in order to get to that next level of torture, male on male, it has to take a turn for the gay. It always takes a turn for the gay. And people don't realize that they think you're gay. But what you're really doing is, is you're doing these crazy homoerotic things in order to sufficiently humiliate.
Yeah, I mean, it's weird.
There's definitely been a lot of of eroticism in our humor. And part of me thinks it's a noble effort to rid the world of homophobia. Yes, you're a hero.
You should be on a postage stamp reading off in an airplane.
Yes, Brian, I'll be on a billboard.
Tucows 3D is the gayest movie I've ever seen. I include Brokeback Mountain. I include all the usual suspects. I enjoyed it very much for that reason. But it's by far the greatest movie ever.
I think I think Jackass number two might have edged it out. Really know who got in? Jackass one who got the dick bit by the snake.
That was Jackass two. Oh, yeah. That was the first thing we shot for that movie. That was Chris Pontius.
Well, it's weird. I don't know if everything hits everyone the same, and I'll do plenty of things. I'll jump off plenty of buildings and a plenty of swimming pools. So I don't have a problem with a lot of stuff. But the dick and the snake. Yeah, that would be a tough one. That'd be a tough threshold to cross. You know, when you're pushing your dick into the terrarium, right.
There is a puppet show, as I recall it.
Do you people when you come up with the gags, as we call them in the business, when you come up with the gags, do you come up with them and assign them to people because they could get hurt, killed, injured, whatever? Or do you have to kind of do your own gags?
Well, it's a great question, man. I always get the same questions all the time, and very few people ever ask me this, but that I think that the formula is based on our respect for intellectual property. So if somebody comes up with an idea, it's essentially that idea is that person's property. And so if you see anybody performing a gag, then you can assume either that person came up with the gag or was given permission from the person who did come up with the gag.
Now, sometimes people would deliberately write a gag for an individual because it just fits that person. Sometimes nobody wants to do it and then they'll trickle down. The bad ideas will trickle down to everybody. Danger, Aaron. But, yeah, there's a respect for for IP that that's that's that's kind of cool.
Like I do remember, those jackass two, possibly three were banned, came over. He really drew a very crude drawing of the women and the big fellows, the Preston Preston people, they jumped off a bridge or something in tandem and they cut a slingshot at each other.
So that's an example of when you would brush your teeth gags specifically for some guys like us.
Yeah, yeah. People don't I don't know if people know this about Knoxville. Knoxville is a super nice guy. He's also a really good athlete like he always plays and the father son softball, the the whatever the soft Fathers Day softball game that Jimmy puts up over at UCLA, sadly, one of the many things that we could have done this year, but we didn't. But outdoors and all. But I think he hit a home run last I mean, over the fence kind of thing.
Like he was a good ballplayer, too, as well. He's like a good, good athlete.
He was a very high level baseball player, I believe, in high school.
Right? Yeah. He can definitely play baseball because I played like five softball games with now. Always, always a good, good. Hang that guy. Oh, yeah. There's there he is bat and he was free HanTing ones with you at you on your billboard. Yeah. And I mean if you just see it, I mean that ball's coming at your head one hundred miles an hour.
A good stroke. It was, it was one of the few, if not the only times I can recall all the jackass guys around saying, stop, stop. It's too much too gnarly, right. Yeah. And yeah, it's just it's crazy. Well, speaking of gnarly, that has a kick.
Yeah. Speaking of the speaking of gnarly. Yeah.
You know, when you talk about doing something that's for your own good, when you make amends to him and you know, when like when Adam said, I can't wrap my head around somebody sticking their dick in a terrarium as a woman when people like you.
Barely brushed somebody's little sack tap and they go down, that's not something I'll ever understand. I don't get how that could be painful. What the hell is going to feel in my stomach? Like, I don't get it. I don't get what you're saying.
I felt that kick. I felt it deep into my uterus. I felt that.
Did you ever recover from that kick started, Steve?
It was, yeah. That one was heavy. And I just got to say thank you so much for watching the program. I appreciate that so much. That was very finally.
I should give it a plug, by the way. It's been long enough. It's called Ngala. It's very funny, standup special. And it's kind of as someone who did a standup special that has some visuals, I myself was that way sort of stories about your life, like instead of, you know, tell jokes for 60 Minutes, having to be a little more interactive than that. That's what this is. And it's available now at Steve O Dotcom.
So it's like fun for the whole family as long as the whole family is a dude and over 18 and drunk for sure.
Thank you. It was it was really exciting. I mean, I got into stand up. Oh, like twenty six.
You know, I started touring in 2010 and for all my efforts to establish myself as a stand up comedian, it is always felt like, you know, like, what's this guy doing? And then when it struck me that I could be doing multimedia comedy where I'm telling the stories and editing into it like footage to illustrate the stories I'm telling, then I feel like I found my place in comedy and it just worked really well and I'm just so excited about it.
Well, look, you know, doing your first standup special at age forty five or forty five and a half or whatever, this is my second, the first one I did four for Showtime and I was sure it was going to just change my life.
Everybody's going to respect me. I'll be established and damn that special came and went and nothing changed about my life I guess.
I guess I'm proving your point by thinking this was your first one, although I think I remember the first one was four years ago.
Yeah, it came out in twenty sixteen. Yeah. There you go. Yes I know. I now do think that but the notion that you are this like kind of professional stunt dummy and then you come up with doing standup after the age of 40, essentially it's pretty impressive.
Well, well thank you man. It was I don't know how old I was and twenty six, maybe I was 32, but but yeah. I mean, you know, I'm getting up there and it's really, it's really exciting to just, you know, be thriving not only like in a pandemic, you know, but but just at this age, like, you know, even if the Jackass four doesn't happen because there's no more movie theaters, I feel like I'm in a pretty good spot because, you know, I've kind of built type of thing.
Well, you're going to just go back. And as soon as it's I don't know why you guys need to be safe. Everyone kicking each other in the nut sack. I mean, what do you need any protocols for? But I guess for the camera guy, but. Right. I'd imagine you guys are going to get back to it the second. The second you can. And then I'm also assuming, is everyone kind of in for a taste?
Is it like a rev share kind of deal?
Yeah, I think so. You can stand to make a lot of money because the budget isn't that great on something like this. Just by the nature of it.
It's been very profitable in the past. I forget what the first one made like sixty five million in the second were made like eighty five million. The third one made like one hundred and twenty million. And the budgets were reasonably small. I got they got bigger as we went. The first budget I think was six million then I don't know about you but twenty million for the third one. Right. Good margin.
Yeah. The opposite of Battlefield Earth. That's when you make a movie. That's what you want to do. Small budget.
Big, big, fat return. All right, let's see. So let me just hit a spot here and then maybe we'll think about doing a doing some news. Stevo, hang out with us. I'm glad.
I'm glad there's sober stevo. I like sober Stevo and think how much you'd be drinking during this pandemic if you were still drinking.
I mean there would be any different pandemic or not. I was pretty. You're pretty maxed out. Yeah I was, I was, I was gone. There was no longevity.
How did it, how did it, I mean obviously you didn't want to, probably didn't want to stop drinking when Stevo or Dr. Drew were talking about it. How did that day work out? How much of that do you recall? I remember it actually pretty well, the Knox had reached out to Dr. Drew saying, hey, we're going to lose Stavo. Dr. Drew said, I agree completely. Get over there and do a what's called a 51 50, where you can commit somebody to a psychiatric ward against their will.
And jurors said, you have you have to if you have to kick his ass and tie him up with duct tape and throw him in the trunk to do whatever you got to do to get him to the hospital. And so that's what they did. They came over. There are eight of them in Knoxville and Knoxville and the basically the production team of Jackass that there is the director, Jeff Tremaine, the, you know, executive producer, Chip Taylor, the sound guy, one of the camera guys.
It was like, this is crazy.
The same people who helped me hurt myself right. For so long, coming in to rescue me from myself. And when I got into the psych ward, I was belligerent.
I was like, you know, throwing furniture around.
Well, what were you we were drinking. Was it just.
It wasn't God. No, it wasn't. It was ketamine, which was a big player at the you know, at that at that time, cocaine was always a huge thing. You know, I can thread my nose with a shoelace through the big hole in the wall in there, the nitrous oxide, PCP, video, head cleaner. I didn't care. I was I was pretty gnarly.
So it wasn't just the spiked seltzer. Correct. OK.
And so I said, they're checking me into this, you know, take me to the psychiatric ward and I'm throwing a temper tantrum. And this is in Los Angeles. I was at Cedars Sinai.
And I remember like being tackled by security orderlies, you know, like they threw me on this this stretcher thing and jabbed a needle in my butt cheek. And then that was just lights out.
Oh, really? Yeah. They hit you with the propofol. Yeah, the booty juice.
I think I forget what what they I'm I'm glad they have that that that needle. So they hit you with that. You go out. And then I woke up and I was in the part of the hospital where, where the doors don't open, you know, and and interestingly they they had two wings of this psychiatric unit. There was east and west, and one of them was four sort of standard issue harmful to yourself and others, you know, cases.
And then the other wing was for, like something else, variety, you know, like the really special ones. And I was in the something else wing. And for my for my belligerent behavior. Upon arrival, they changed my status from fifty one fifty, which is a three day involuntary hold to fifty to fifty, which is an entire two weeks involuntary.
Wow. So I don't even know. That's like this amp goes to 11. I didn't know they had a 52. Yeah it's, it sounds like a punch line you know, you got fifty to fifty these fucking crazy but yeah.
But they have a fifty to fifty, fifty to fifty and that means a two week long involuntary hold. And that was the saving grace because three days wouldn't have done the trick. It was actually on day four or five that you know, that I'd start OK, like I got to do something here.
So who were the first people you remember seeing over there? I got great questions, man. They had me sharing a room in the psych ward with with this one guy just out of it. He was like hearing voices. He was like it was like he was being attacked the whole time. That was is most annoying roommate you could get. Yeah.
Then there's another guy in the hallway and the hallway was like carpet. It was the only thing carpeted. And this guy watched him like pull his pants down and actually shit like a huge shit right on the carpet in the hallway. And that wasn't enough. After you got done shiting, he'd like rolled around in it, smearing it all over himself.
The sad part is, is these guys are in front of Garagos Restaurant right now in downtown L.A. It's sitting on his patio furniture like, yeah, Drew always tells me when you're that far gone, you have this obsession with shit which has got to be working around.
Those people got to be the fucking worst, right, when that's their thing.
But medium, right. They work.
And so you are there. This is horrible. Who who do you have a recollection of Knoxville and company doing this to you? Oh, the actual intervention for sure. Yeah. And and so somebody comes down, somebody from Drus camp, somebody from Knoxville came down, they just told, they just told Knoxville, get over there and get him to the hospital.
I think maybe Drew helped to have the hospital notified and.
You know, expecting might. And at what point do you go from that place? I mean, you're there for two weeks.
I was there for, I believe, seven days. And, you know, by that time, my story was, OK, I'm willing to, you know, to surrender, to commit I commit myself to recovery. And I want to go door to door to rehab, you know, pack a bag. No, think about it. And I went from the psych ward straight to to I was actually Dr. Drew's licensee in this hospital where he was the the director of the chemical dependency unit.
Yeah. You didn't want to go back to your place. And I had just been evicted. I had I had a colorful last week before my intervention. I was I was arrested for cocaine possession and vandalism. I and my relationship ended. I was evicted from my apartment. I was committed to a psych ward.
Wow. So, I mean, you went out in a blaze of glory. I mean, you did everything you could do and then you show up at Drew's place. And how long do you stay there?
Well, I showed up at Drew's place while I was being processed in or, you know, entered into his his program. I remember I remember telling Drew, I said, I know that the statistics are really bad. You know, that the odds are not in favor. Most people don't get sober. I was aware of that. And I said, if I'm going to do this, I want to I want to give myself every advantage I can have.
I want to go all in. And so however long you recommend I stay in this in this unit, I want to stay significantly longer to give myself a better chance of actually staying sober, which was a reckless move because the place was fucking expensive. And I'm like handing Drew a blank check. But what he said to his credit was, I don't recommend that you stay here for more than 30 days. But if you're if you're really serious about it, then I recommend you go into a sober living, you know, like a halfway house.
And I ended up staying in a halfway house until I had been sober for two years.
So I was going to film Jackass 3D and go get catapults up into the sky. And I'm going to my my my halfway house manager getting permission to miss my curfew. You know, like, it was pretty, pretty intense. And I don't think I know anybody who stayed in sober living for that long and who didn't stay and remain sober.
Well, what what do you think is their component to your personality? That's a kind of an all component for you. You're all in with drugs and you're all in with the stunts and then you're all in with sobriety. Pretty much.
Yeah, I moderations never been my strong suit.
It's got to be tough in a relationship. I mean, it's good at the beginning. I guess at a certain point all it is, is it's tough in relationships.
You fight hard. You love hard. Yeah. Is it tough in relationships? I mean, I never managed to make it so much as 10 months into a relationship until I met my girl now. And with that said, I was, you know, my sexual lifestyle, you know, called for yet another 12 step fellowship. And I really I really took that seriously, you know, in an effort to, you know, learn how to have a healthy relationship.
And now I'm engaged.
And these kids have been at it for nine months and 28 days, everybody.
So that I'm with my girlfriend for three years. Oh, really? Yeah.
I couldn't have I mean, you couldn't have a relationship unless you're sober, right? Absolutely.
Now, there's no possible way I, I couldn't do anything like, honestly, if I wasn't sober, I don't think I could do anything. You'd be dead by now. Right. I've been over in twelve years. I think probably what I did by now, if I wasn't dead by now, it would have been even more depressing. I think I think that's safe to say. But, you know, like by just by the virtue of not, you know, wasting so much time getting loaded, being loaded, making horrible decisions, you know, like with the other, you know, acting out, it frees up a lot of time to focus on what you actually want to do.
And at the end of the day, it feels for me like, wow, life's not actually that complicated or difficult.
You know, what what percentage of the gags slash stunts you would you have executed in the first season or, you know, Jackass and then Jackass the movie. Did you have something in you? Well, you always had something in you.
But I mean, like, were you affected or intoxicated to some degree, you know, with Jackass if. And so it's like the movie Boogie Nights, where where Burt Reynolds is telling Marky Mark like, no, I'm not shooting you, you know, right near your children. And you're right.
That happened to me by the pool, right?
That happened to me when I was just, you know, too fucked up. We're not shooting with it, you know, and like, there was there were a number of scenes in Jackass where it was, you know, we're hung over, you know, but there wasn't ever, like, really where we're wasted on camera. That wasn't the spirit of it. And and I don't think that I ever did any stunts anyway. I mean, I don't know.
Yeah, I did some stuff because I was wasted. But for the most part, I do it all because I'm an attention or so it's not a scene.
It's not a situation where, like there's some artists who think they can write great songs because they're getting high or whatever, and then they get sober and they lose. They're like creative spark or something.
That is a thing that is a definitely thing. And like when we were filming Jackass 3D, you know, I turned two years sober, like when we were in production on that. And still I was terribly uncomfortable in my own skin. I was like, just, you know, I hadn't found my voice. And there is like in early sobriety is uncomfortable as fuck. And, you know, there are concerns about it, like, I've lost you.
I am. But I fought through it and I feel like now I'm way more creative than I was before.
What is the regimen like? I'm always kind of interested in the schedule of things like when you're in a halfway house, how does that work schedule wise? So you guys are on a clock, like everyone's up at eight and we're doing breakfast at eight thirty, or you just meander out of your bedroom when you're good and ready and there are lights out, like, how much is it the army?
How much regimen is there if you're not up and out of bed with your bed made at by nine o'clock in the morning, you're getting written up and you get written up three times you're out.
So there's a there's a discipline that had been removed from your former life. I mean, that I say I'm all I'm all about. I mean, nine doesn't sound like six am.
But what I'm saying is, is I feel like people need a schedule. They need rules, accountability, and they need accountability. And we're kind of waiving a lot of that. Like I let them find themselves and let them do their own thing. I think when you leave people alone to find themselves, they start chewing on their own legs, like when a dog just starts picking at itself like a field. That's what happens with people. I wish we were all something enough to handle it without the clock and the discipline and the guidance counselor and the drill sergeant and the football coach like kind of doing that.
But I realize a lot of the people who I see in our society that seem insanely miserable are people that aren't on a schedule like they don't have that hay up out of bed. Here we go. Make your bed time to work out. Then we shower, then we eat, then we go. It sounds like it's first off, it's something that nobody wants to do. And then secondly, it sounds like the opposite of creativity or living a free life.
But when you just let people alone, they go to bed at four in the morning, they wake up at twelve thirty, they have a fucking candy bar and they go to take a nap, beat off and then go eat another candy bar. The people go south when you when you leave. When you pull them out of a structure.
I think so. Yeah.
So well like you said, drill sergeants and football coaches and correctional officers, whatever, those jobs wouldn't exist if we did this for ourselves.
So the answer is kind of in the question, we would need them. Yes.
We wouldn't have so many thousands of people working at prisons or coaches or counselors or whatever if everyone just sort of tended to themselves and did a good job. Like if we were sort of, you know, if we were wired like ants where it's like you just go, you do your job, you do your job, you did his job, you do that. We'd be the worst fucking ants in the world, half of their people to be sitting and eating, watching the other ants work and then complaining that they're not working hard enough.
Where do you get to eat all the good parts of the June bug? Because I got up and I got out of the fucking hill.
Junior ant hill, that is. All right. Let me hit the true and then we'll break and then we'll do some news. True Najin. I've been taken this true najin for cellular health. It's a vitamin. Dr. Drew is on it as well. I've been on it for about six months. Who's been on it for a number of years now. We get older, our bodies experience it near 50 percent decline and in a disease which negatively affects our health and ourselves and our body.
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