This is an all ears English podcast, episode 15 30. Are you a softy? How to describe what a person's really like in English?

Welcome to the All Ears English podcast downloaded more than 200 million times. Are you feeling stuck with your English? We'll show you how to become fearless and fluent by focusing on connection, not perfection, with your American hosts. Linda McMahon, the English adventurer, and Michelle Kaplan, the New York Radio Girl coming to you from Colorado and New York City U.

S a sometimes people are not as they seem.

What can you say in English when you see that someone has a tough exterior but then is actually quite sensitive on the inside? Find out today.

Hey, Michelle, how's everything going today? Hey, Lindsey, I'm good, I'm good. How are you? Good. Happy Mar. Happy Mar. Happy Mar. Thank you very much. Thank you very much.

Do you know anyone who's a teddy bear? Oh, yeah, for sure. I've known a lot of guys, especially guys, not really women. Right. That's not really a thing to refer to women, but men who are just sweet guys. Maybe they look like scary guys, but they're sweet. Definitely I do. Right. Right, right.

Yeah, yeah. I mean, yeah, I agree. I think of a teddy bear as being someone who might like. Yeah, I do think that it's mostly used for men. I think so. But I mean somebody who might like a peer, you know, a little bit tougher, maybe they're like very, very muscular, very something like that. And maybe they have a like a tough outer appearance.

But they're up. Their personality is not that they're like really, really sweet. So that's like the way that you would use teddy bear.

Exactly.

It's always funny when this happens. It's like a famous wrestler or some famous guy, and then you find out that he's actually very sensitive and a crier or something.

Right. Right, right, right. Right. Exactly, exactly. So, guys, we're going to talk more about teddy bears and other types of ways. You can describe this today. So but before we do that, guys, we have this amazing Web class coming up very soon in just a few days. So Aubrey and Jessica are going to be sharing how you can get a promotion at work in English. Right, Lindsay? That is an amazing topic.

Superimportant.

It's so cool. It's our first business, English Web Class of the year, guys. And the first business English class we did last year was so popular. OK, so there's only a limited number of students that can join. So you must sign up. Now you're going to learn the three step strategy to build those the confidence and the skills that you need to get your next pay raise or promotion in English. So go to all your English dot com slash promotion and sign up.

So good.

A very, very exciting. Yeah. So guys, this expression teddybear, I mean it kind of makes me think of like the expression don't judge a book by its cover, right. Lonzie. Yeah, yeah.

That's a good one. So it means, you know, just because something looks some way on the on the front, that doesn't mean that that's what the inside is. Yeah. That's a perfect example. Right.

Right, right. So yeah. Lindsay, you mentioned it like it could be like a wrestler, right. Yeah, that's what I'm thinking of. Maybe it's like a very large or muscular guy with a very sweet disposition. So you could say something like, oh, he may look really tough in the ring, but trust me, he's a teddy bear, especially with his kids. Yeah, exactly. Or a bouncer at a club always standing there.

Big guy with his arms crossed. Yeah, right.

Right, right. Well, what is a bouncer, Lindsay? Oh, good question, Michel. A bonus for our listeners today, guys. The bouncer is someone usually that big guy again that stands outside decides and he bounces people out. That's right. That's right. Yeah. They don't have a real I.D. If their idea is fake, for example, or if they're not old enough or sometimes if they're just not dressed well enough, you might bounce you out of the club.

So terrible about the dressing. Yeah. Yeah.

So but yeah, you could say, oh my gosh, I can't believe he didn't let you in. Don't be mad at him. He's a really a total teddy bear even though he looks intimidating.

Yeah. And the old story around like nightclubbing at least in the US, often it's easier for women to get into clubs than men because there's usually way more guys in nightclubs than women. Right. That's so funny. Yeah, it's terrible.

Like I feel like I've heard. Have you ever heard people talk about ratio? No.

What is that? Oh, like I've heard of it. I don't know if it's just for frat parties or if it's at clubs too, but like I've heard of it where I'm like a guy, if a guy comes in, it's like they have a certain ratio of women and men that they want like.

So maybe I'm not sure if it's just in general or if a guy actually comes in that he has to have a certain amount of, oh, that's something like that.

But that's I've heard of ratio, which just terrible. Yeah. It's so bad. It's so bad. Anyway, so my days of clubbing are pretty much over, I think. So we can leave that in the rearview mirror.

But yeah, I'm happy. Yeah but yeah. About teddy bears. I mean Lindsey did you have stuffed animals or teddy bears as a kid.

I did have them yeah. To a certain age. I did have stuffed animals for sure. For sure. What about you Michelle. Oh yeah. I loved my Barney the dinosaur and I loved baby dolls and I definitely loved stuffed animals for sure. And now that I have a son, there's a lot of them stuffed animals around here.

Oh, my goodness, that's awesome. Are there any other expressions, Michelle, that can be used to talk about someone's personality with this idea of, you know, he looks tough on the outside, but he's kind of a softy? Well, that would be. Well, you gave it away.

It was exactly natural. Softy. Yeah. So, I mean, Lindsay, you said. Why did you say that? What is what what is a softy? It's just like a stuffed animal soft in the middle. Right. So someone who might be kind of emotional. Maybe a Krier, maybe cry and sad movies are commercial commercials, you look over and there's tears falling down their face, but they look tougher, they seem tough. That's the reputation, right?

Right, right. Right. And I mean, I don't think I think this one would be used for women or men. I mean, I. Yeah, I think yeah.

I think teddy bears a little bit different, but softy, it's it may also not be that you necessarily look tough, but it just might be you're kind of like revealing that you're vulnerable. You're kind of if you tell somebody that you're a softer you're kind of like showering with them, that you really you know, you might you might shed a few tears over something like you could say, oh, man, I can't say no to my dog when he asks for a treat.

I'm such a softy.

Yeah. That makes me think of the expression a soft spot. Right. Maybe this is going to be a bonus or something, but you have a soft spot for dogs or for babies or whatever. It is the one thing that you can never say no to.

Exactly. Exactly, exactly. I mean, do you think that it's a positive trait to be a softy or I mean, like, what kind of connotation does it have? Oh, my gosh.

I personally think it's positive for sure because it shows that you have a heart. Yeah. You know, yeah. I think it's kind of cool.

Like if on the on the surface you look tough and maybe you're very assertive or confident or hard on the surface, but then on the inside, there's a whole nother you that you don't necessarily reveal to everyone, which is good. Right. But sometimes it just comes out. That's kind of cool. Kind of dynamic. Exactly. Exactly. All right.

This next one, I love this one. This one is intense. What? I love this. He's all he or she is all bark and no bite. So good. So good.

So this originally comes from the idea of like dogs, right? That bark, bark, bark. They seem so aggressive.

But the way the little dogs. Right. Yeah. Especially the little dogs.

They never bite. They're not harmful. Or even big dogs could do that. Right. Even like a German shepherd. Maybe a particular German shepherd might bark a lot but may not bite.

Right. They don't want anyone. They're just scary on the outside.

So what's an example, Michelle? Guys, the business English Live Web class is coming up very soon, March 6th and 9th. And there will not be a replay or recording. So you need to sign up now, learn how to ask for the promotion that you deserve in business. English sign up now at all is English dot com forward slash promotion. That's all ears. English dot com forward slash p r o m o. T i. O n.

Right, well, yeah, so you could say he gets really loud sometimes when he's frustrated, but really he's all bark and no bite. It's just like, you know, somebody is this person isn't going to actually do something to harm you. Right?

Like, even it could be even talking about physical harm. Right. Like but it's just like they're they're not really harmful. That's what this is saying. They'd say a lot, though. Exactly.

Or if someone is talking a big game. Right. That's another bonus for today. They talk a big game. They say they're going to beat you at something. Maybe it's a sport. Maybe it's a card game. Right. Michel Darts, for example.

Oh, no darts. Darts. I don't know. Why not.

Why not? And he might you might say, oh, he likes to trash talk, but don't worry, he's all bark and no bite.

He's actually not really any good at football or football is the game that they're talking about there. And to trash talk to guys I hope are writing these down today, guys. A lot of vocab words. Trash talk is what, Michelle?

Yeah, it's you know, when people are playing a game, sometimes they like to have this, like, spirited conversation. I'm going to beat you. Oh, you're nothing like this. Kind of it's kind of in a fun, fun way. And it's done a lot in sports and other games. Exactly. Exactly.

And then what's another word now? This next one, Michelle? I don't use quite as much as the others, but do you use it? I hear it, but yeah, I don't kind of use it quite as much as the others.

I agree. But it's tough on the outside, soft on the inside. So it's the same idea. Guys, we'll go through this one quickly.

It's my husband's six foot five, so people find him intimidating. Honestly, he's tough on the outside, but he's soft on the inside, right?

Yeah, perfect. Tough on the outside. Soft on the inside. I love it. I love it. Very cool. And then the last one guy. Oh, there's another example here, though. Do we have one more example. Oh yeah. Professor.

Yeah, my professor was super intimidating at first, but now that I know her, I know she's just tough on the outside.

Soft on the inside. Yeah.

Did you have the situation at all in school in your university experience where there was some professor that really intimidated you? At first?

I think back to a history teacher that I had in high school, and I remember the first day I like, cried because I was so scared. And it was also seemed like a lot of work. But then he was quite a teddy bear, actually. It's like, yeah, you look back, you're like, how did I ever get so upset about that? So, yeah.

And kids also tell roomers like, oh, that that guy's class is so hard. Right. And then you walk in and you're all your stomach's all in knots, but then you realize it's really not that bad if you just do the work, right.

Exactly. Exactly. So and then we have one more. It's a hard shell. So like, I'm thinking of a turtle or maybe a piece of candy, right? Yeah, for sure.

And this is the one I meant when I said I didn't use it very much. But this one. Yeah. You know, the person is, you know, not really. They're soft on the inside again and hard on the outside in their shell. Right. She's like got a hard shell, but she's one of the nicest people you'll ever meet.

Exactly. Exactly. So, gosh, we've done a lot of these today. Lindsey, do you want to do a role play? Put them all together. Let's do it. Let's do it. I know that our listeners love role plays that guys, you've told us through the feedback that you love to hear role plays and see how these are used. We're going to do it right now.

Let's do it right. All right. OK, Lindsay, we're in school and we're talking about the teacher. Well, not necessarily in school, but teachers in our new gym class.

Maybe it's just OK, instructor at a gym, whatever. Yes. Sounds good. All right. Here we go. Yeah. Jeff is the most intimidating teacher, I think. You think so? I don't know.

He seems like a teddy bear to me. I find Tina a bit tough.

She's always yelling, yeah, but she's all bark and no bite.

I mean, she always says you have to do 50 pushups if you rest, but she never follows through.

That's true. She's got a hard shell for sure, though. Yeah, I guess. I think Tate is the best one. He's a softy. Yeah.

He's so friendly. He's funny. You step on the outside and soft on the inside.

Yeah. Yeah.

Cool. I like that. So let's go back through it. Michelle. So first here I said you think so. I don't know. He seems like a teddy bear to me. He seems like a teddy bear. And that was the one we started off with today, guys. So exactly.

And then you said Tina was tough. I said she's all bark and no bite. Right. So she's always yelling, but she she's kind of just like threatens, but she doesn't actually do it right about the extra push ups.

Exactly. And then I said, that's true.

She's got a hard shell for sure. She appears very tough on the outside.

Mm mm.

And then I said, I think Tate is the best one. He's a softy. Right. So he's really nice, maybe emotional. Something like that. Yeah. Yeah, he's a softy.

And then I said, yeah, he's so friendly. It's funny, he's tough on the outside and soft on the inside. I'm not sure if I use the right intonation the first time they're guys, but yeah, he's still friendly. It's funny, right. It's funny. That's interesting. When I, when I'm going to introduce kind of a contradiction. Contradictions. Funny. Yeah. Use that, that intonation. Right. It's very. He's tough on the outside, but soft on the inside, so guys play around with your intonation when you're going to introduce kind of a weird contradiction a little bit.

Yeah, that's fun.

That's fun, Lindsey. So, yeah, guys, this this has been a fun episode.

I mean, guys, I mean, the take away is these are super useful ways to describe people. I mean, you know, like we said, never judge a book by its cover and never judge a person by his or her cover. Right. So there's a lot that we can learn here. We taught a lot of expressions, a lot of new vocabulary.

You know, you don't want to tell someone that they have a hard shell, you know, like I wouldn't say like, oh, let you have a hard shot. You know, somebody might not like hearing that. So you want to you want to consider that? Definitely. Definitely.

And if you think that maybe your boss has a hard shell, but is the softie on the inside, then come to this Web class right now and learn how to ask for a promotion so you can move up in your career.

Guys, go to all those English dot com slash promotion. It is happening next week, so you definitely want to get in there. Yes.

So although this was so much fun, Lindsay, I hope you have a good one. All right. Talk to you soon, Michelle. Bye bye.

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