Transcribe your podcast

Welcome back to another week of happy hour with the two of us. And Rachel, this week, I have to say it finally, finally, finally felt like a real typical bachelor episode with a start and a finish for once.


This is what we've been asking for. And so in that regard, I am thrilled.


And it was cute.


It was your typical hometown dates.


I want to get into it because we have an incredible guest joining us today, probably one of the most requested men that we've had that we've seen this season that we're going to have on. And that is Mr. Ivin himself. And I've been dying to talk to him since that one on one date that he had with Tatia. So I can't wait to have him on to pick his brain, to talk about his family and the incredible impact that he has made so far on this season.


And I would say bachelor franchise as a whole.


Are you guys concerned about what's in your hair color? I know that I am. I'm afraid that it might be damaging my hair. Do you have that same concern as well? Well, Madison Reid, at home, hair color is made with ingredients that you can feel good about. Madison Reed is full of ingredients that nourish your hair, and it's infused with argan oil cureton and ginseng root extract. So you get shiny and healthy looking hair color. It's also super convenient.


I can color my hair at home while I'm answering emails or even while I'm recording a podcast. So this is how it goes. I took the Madison Recolour Quiz to help me find my perfect shape. I answered a few questions online and I got the color that was perfect for me. And they have more than 55 different shades that are all absolutely beautiful. So you're definitely going to find the one that fits you. So get Omonia free, multi-dimensional hair color delivered right to your door, guys.


Starting at twenty two dollars in Madison Dasari Dotcom. Make sure you use our promo code and you'll get 10 percent off plus free shipping on your first color kit. The promo code ISBA visit Madison Dash Dotcom now to find your perfect shade. Yeah, I mean, I couldn't agree with you more. It's interesting, I didn't even think about the fact that we had a traditional episode from start to finish until you just said that.


And I'm like, yeah, you're right. You're right. And we're finally there. Right. And, you know, hometown week is usually.


Not eventful. Do you know what I mean? Like, right, you have your few exceptions, like on my season beating Dean's family and his and like he didn't have a traditional family. And there've been so many issues after the death of his mother that he's been trying to deal with. And there was just a lot there. And you probably will never see a home town like that again. So this was what I expected it to be. Straight forward.


Not for us. It's for Teisha. It's a chance for Tatia to get to know these men on another level, to better understand where she wants to move forward in this journey and also for the families to get to know Taisha, who was your favorite hometown? My favorite hometown. Well, I'm going to give it I'm going to give you two parts because. Well, because what I found interesting for this was like they obviously could not leave the resort.


So the men had to bring home towns to look into. Which in itself is interesting. And also, like I could have probably done without that part, I would have rather had. And just putting myself back in the contestants shoes, rather, had just a full day with the family as opposed to like trying to recreate this fake city home town vibe at this hot as balls resort, if I will say that. So I guess like when I said two parts, my favorite.


Actually, I shouldn't even split it up. It was just an event I was trying to think I was about to say Zachs like cheesy, funny New York day just because I love cheesy. But like, actually, if I was Tatia, I probably would have loved Ivan's date from start to finish the best. And you're laughing at me right now, and I know probably what you're going to say. Why why are you why do you think I'm laughing?


Are you laughing at the cheesy New York date? Yes, it was at that moment when I saw the taxicabs that I said or cab, I said, you know what? This is the first time I feel sorry that she's doing her entire season at looking that I never have. I've been appreciating the depth of the conversations. I've been appreciating the fact that there aren't distractions, that these days have been very real life and she can get a better feel of what it is to be with these men and once the bubble is gone.


But I thought, my God, when when they picked up that box, I took 50 steps, 50 feet to the stands.


I feel so sorry, but you got to love Zach's enthusiasm when hailing a cab.


So, I mean, it was it was cute. I said shout out to the producers were really trying to make something out of nothing, but I felt so bad for her. There is something special about his behind the scenes. You guys behind the scenes talk. What's so great is when you're the lead, you're the one planning the dates and announcing the dates and leading the person to where they go and what's next. You know, what's ahead before they do.


Well, when it comes to hotels, the lead is in the dark and the lead really gets to follow what that person is doing because it's they're showing you their hometown, their family, how they navigate their life away from the camera. So it's a really special moment and take it and get that with these men because they were still looking to places that I can see my role from over there. All I'm holding up this box taxi. She was definitely robbed of the experience.


And and I think when I was on hometowns, one of my favorite parts was, again, behind the scenes. But like when we would just be driving in the car, going from place to place and you can be with that person and they can point out, oh, that's my school, or that's where I used to go grocery shopping. That's where this happened. And to see those little special moments, to really get a feel for who somebody is and how they grew up is special.


And she was robbed of it. And that's why I say, like, I wish you would have just had the full day to spend with the families to really be able to interact fully with them out.


They step the game. I want to see it. Yeah, I will agree with you, though. My favorite hometown was Ivens. From his parents to that. Well, the cooking to the parents, to the brother, to Ivan's reaction. I just loved it all. Close second, though, are the clerks, because that's what Zach said. Kept saying you constantly referred to his family as the clerks meeting. The clerks liked it. Yeah. Yes.


I mean, I'm like I'm just I just love people. So I love like seeing it's so different when the contestants are actually in front of their brothers and sisters and nieces and nephews and parents. And so that's special to see.


Yeah. Like nothing major. Major stood out, really. And like any of the conversations to me, it was again your standard, like getting to know the family. We do start to see a little foreshadowing.


I feel like, though, with some of the guys, like I noticed right away with Brendon, he's very in his head and and he makes multiple comments about like, I don't know if I'm quite there yet, ready to propose, like, I don't know if I want to do this again. And it's interesting because I watch then show with him and see her body language and how she interacts and she is so into him.


Did you notice that like that?


But I have I want to talk about XXXI. I see Brendon.


She is everything from her body language to how her face lights up. She is enamored with Brendon word. That's exactly what it is. And I think like, thank God, his hometown was first to kind of like get it out of the way, because I felt like if it would have been the last one, that's all people would have been fixated on, I think.


Yeah, I, I have an issue with Brenden's, that type of person that's on the show. I got into a rage. I am over the person who gets to this point and is like, I'm not ready. I am so sick of that narrative. Why are you on the show? We all know how this shit is right. Like, you know what happens in the show. So for you to pull out the car, taking the spot of a RYLEY who would have done anything to get a hometown, dare I say it, even a Blake M.


. People who really wanted that spot. And here you are saying bringing up things that you knew from the first day you knew you were married, you before you knew you had certain reservations, you knew that this was another level for you because you've gone down on one knee and you don't want to rush the process. So why the hell are you on The Bachelor? It's all rushed, you know what I mean? Like, when I see people like that, I am questioning you.


I can't see Brendon any other way other than this is an opportunity for him. You aren't serious about this. You're wasting precious time. I it makes me think like, did you come on just one cloud and some sort of fame or did you come on, like truly being open and not thinking you were going to potentially fall this hard and fast for somebody?


But yeah, at the end of the day, like, hello, newsflash, anyone signing up to be a contestant on the show, like the goal is to get to the elite like that is no excuses us.


No. Yeah, nothing is nothing works. The fact that she's having a fantasy suite, you knew that was going to happen. The fact that you're surprised at how quickly you fell, that's always a possibility. There is no excuse for it. You cannot change my mind. And other than you've got as far as you wanted to get and now you're using this as an excuse. It's been done before. It's coming on the show for cloud use a different excuse.


There's other TV show. There's other shows for that. We see it. Yeah, I'm over it. Can I ask you a question? Yeah. Do you think that our two favorite hometowns were the ones where the parents came? We didn't. Ben and Brendon did. Their parents didn't come. Do you think that that played into tasteless decisions because. I thought that was I know coverts happening and I know certain people have reservations, and I know my dad didn't show up on camera, but he still was there, right?


Like he was he still met all the men. I just was like, I wonder how she feels about because Ben explained it. I don't remember hearing from Brendan if he explained it. Yeah.


And no, I don't remember hearing from running either.


I think I mean, maybe and that at least for me, I would, I think, need to meet some of these parents before potentially getting engaged that just like because like when you potentially marry somebody, you're marrying that family and so they can call or face time. Yeah.


And I'm hoping there's like parts that we missed. I'm not sure we got to get into Ben, though, because he. Very on brand with him this entire season, Ben's timing is so terrible, and so we see him not have his parents, but he has his sister, which he's talked at length about how she's the most important in his life. I get that the family friend showed up to what was her name? Antonio. Antonia, Rachel.


She's a great chef in L.A. sidenote she owns several or is the head chef several restaurants. But we got to go when restaurants open back up because I've ended two of them and her food is impeccable.


And she's a family friend of his. What was it? What's her restaurant? Her restaurant. And she has Scopa in Venice and all she does scoping. And then let's go.


But if you love Scopa, this other one that I went to before things shut down, it's called Black Market Liquor Bar, and their food is like I had to be dragged out of there. I ordered way too much. Everything was incredible. So shout out to Antonia.


But yeah, I think like main takeaway with that is that Ben. I have a real issue with the fact that he needed somebody else to tell him that he was in love, like I don't understand. If you are a grown man, you are, what, 30 and you couldn't come to that conclusion on your own. It was tough for me to watch him having to have a conversation with somebody else to be like, honey, you're in love.


And then he has this like light bulb go off like this epiphany moment where I'm like, what if you don't laugh because he wasn't in love?


That's yeah. That's at least how I felt about it. Yeah.


And then we see him, of course, like not tell her and get too nervous by the emotion in the whirlwind that is going on in his head and his heart and then her bed and goes home. Yeah, I don't think he thought he was going home. He did seem utterly shocked when she was saying that she wanted more from him and she was surprised at the way it went. I think he couldn't grasp the fact that he was going well.


He wasn't heartless or cold. He was in shock. That's how I felt about it. He thought he had more time, for whatever reason to say whatever. Maybe not. I, I find it interesting because when we did have him on the podcast, he would talk about how he was so thoughtful about every single thing he did. But you couldn't. Be thoughtful about the love that you felt like you couldn't grasp, that you couldn't, or was that part of was that calculated?


Was that plan? I just keep going back to the way that he was on the podcast. So I'm shocked that this is how it ended for him, because it seems as such a stark contrast to the persona that was on the podcast versus how he was on the show. Something doesn't add up with him. As my father says, the ends don't match up. No, I don't believe him. That's what it is. I don't believe you.


Yeah, yeah. I and that's like something with like out of the four remaining guys, he's obviously been the one that has always kind of been off in timing and emotions and like being able to verbalize, but like.


If it's hard for me as a viewer, I can only imagine how hard it would have been, Teisha, it would be like pulling teeth, trying to get any sort of like emotion or feeling or anything out of him.


And I get it like rightfully so after watching all of this, like, I understand why he was the one to not get the rose that night.


He does just enough to stay by. He does just enough. He gives it heat. He reminds me he reminds me of Peter Krauss in the sense that I'm saying this in the sense of he reminds me of him in the way that, like, it gives you just enough. But if you really break down what he's saying, it doesn't match up like something is. And so it's like you have I don't believe you. Like I'm into you. I like you.


I feel it. But there's something that. I can't explain that's not adding up here. Let me ask you this. Do you think all of this just enough, just enough to hang on, but do you think that's because he has this notion of being a potential bachelor?


One day in the background been one thousand percent wants to be the bachelor. And that's why that's why I think he kind of knows how to play and not that it's a game, but like kind of how to play it to to give us enough to open up just enough, but to not, like, fully commit to this relationship that you say you love. Yeah.


And I beg of I beg producers, please don't do it. We've been here before with the person who is so desperate to be the lead. It never works out when they wanted so badly when they've been planning for it. Calculative made certain moves to get to that point and give it to them. It always messes up. There were so many great men from the class last season. Don't pick him. I don't want to see it. I stand by it.


Yeah, well, and now that we've gone into Mad James this season, but we we know this whole narrative that he's never been in love and we need somebody who I want to lead, kind of like Claire, who knows what she wants, who's not ready to settle who. Doesn't put up with any bullshit, doesn't beat around the bush. She's straight and then she goes for what she wants. And so that's what I want to see in my leads from here on out.


Just putting it out there right now, please. And thank you, producers.


Can I just say I want to give a big compliment and how she navigated these hometowns. I think you, Zack, he talked about how at ease she was. She was so confident and warm with every family she fit right in. I just that's not easy to do. So I want to give kudos to her for how well she she did. And I know that she did try at it. She was a natural.


But it was it was nice to see. Yeah. Oh, you know, she handled it beautifully. And I'm sure anyone who has been on the dating scene and has met a family at some point it's nerve wracking. And to do that four times in less than a week, it's it's not easy. And she she navigated it wonderfully.


So kudos to you, Miss Teisha. And with that, as much as we can keep going and talking, you know us. You can't we can't stop. But it is time to have on our amazing guests today because we have been waiting patiently to get them on all season. And I know all of you listening to have to. So we're super excited to be sitting down today with the one and only Ivan.


All right, so because we're staying in these days, we've got to get a little bit more creative with our cooking, I don't know about you guys, but I'm cooking more than ever and I don't like it. But there are some things I do that make me like it more. And one of those is Green Chef. So green chef, you can tailor the type of ingredients that you want if you want a specific diet or if you want a specific recipe.


So for me, I've been working on the paleo and that's what I got. So if you haven't heard about Green Chef, let me tell you a little bit more about it. It's a USDA certified organic company and it includes recipes from paleo Ketel and plant power diets. So there's really something there for everyone. Everything is hand-picked featuring the organic veggies and high quality proteins that you want. And guess what? They're delivered to your door contact free. There are a diverse array of meal plans with plenty of options to choose from each week.


And Green Chef makes staying healthier and on track easier than ever. Recipes include some pre chopped ingredients, some premade sauces, some dressing and spices so you can get more flavor in less the time to go to green chef dotcom slash bachelor eight zero and use code bachelor 80 to get eighty dollars off, including free shipping. That's green chef dot com slash bachelor 80 and use code bachelor 80 to get eighty dollars off. Are you ready, Ivan? I'm ready.




I always want to ask you guys if you're nervous to podcast with us. I'm very nervous right now. No, no, I'm fine. But it's like back on the show, I got into a groove, like interviewing all the time and I haven't done in three months now. So it's OK. I'm sure I'll be fine here soon.


We're not going to interview you, so don't worry.


We just the farthest thing from it will probably say something we're not supposed to say. This is like a conversation between friends, which is why we're like, if you want to grab a drink, I'm not sure if you drink, if you want to live like we're in California.


I was like, if you want to light it up, why did you sit back, enjoy all of this? Because what's so great about will we get to do is we get to go in depth about burning questions people have about you, about your time on the show, about your opinions on the other men in the house, about your relationship with Tatia. There's so many questions, Ivan. You're obviously a fan favorite. Welcome to Basser. Happy hour.




Well, you've been one of the most requested men that we've been asked to have, so we are thrilled to be having you. I mean, we want to get into it. We have so much to ask you. But first, yes, I'd like to play off of Rachel. How have you been? How are you doing now that we're kind of back in quarantine?


And you just were. What was that? It's crazy. Whirlwind of a journey.


Not Dallas. Dallas is not in quarantine out there. Oh, no. Oh, yeah. Everything's definitely. Yeah. Very different from layout here for sure. But no, I've been really good. I got back into my regular routine, took a little trip with my brothers last week. That was fun. And everything's back to normal now. For the most part, it's a anxiety's kind of building is like things progress with the show, but it's been fun.


I've enjoyed everything.


How is watching back with your friends or your family? Is it is it weird? Is it strange? Is it enjoyable?


It's extremely weird. Like the first episode I watched Episode one with Claire, I watched it by myself. I was like, I can't I can't watch with any of you guys. They're going to stress me out. And it was already stressful enough to just be by myself, to be honest. But as time progressed, it's been fun. I went back to my parents house a couple of times and watched with them and watched with a couple of friends last night, actually.


And it's been fun. It's enjoyable to they always have a ton of questions. And I'm like, man, I have a time of my life up there.


Well, Dallas is a hotspot for The Bachelor that you know everybody. OK, so then that's that. I literally got this in my interview. They were like, well, Dallas is a hotspot, you know, because Jojo had just been before me. Is The Bachelorette true? And this is what I was just coming on as a contestant. And they were like, do you know anybody? Do you have you ever met the people on the show?


And I was like, I don't even watch the show. So I couldn't tell you like, either or.


My question for you, Ivan, is how does an aeronautical engineer wind up on The Bachelor? I don't know if we've ever seen it before, and I'm sure we'll never see it again.


We'll see. Well, for me, it was it was interesting. I the show reached out to me via social media, a D.M. and I was like, is this real or whatever? And then I had to go to Google and check to make sure it's a real person, all that stuff. And one thing led to another. And I'm on the show. It's once I started getting into the process, to be honest, I was like, I feel like I'm gonna be on here.


I told my parents it's like a pretty high percent chance I'm going to be on this show. And this is kind of crazy. But, you know, it was a once in a lifetime opportunity, honestly, to meet somebody amazing potentially, and then also be able to do so many amazing things, especially during this quarantine time. So I jumped right at it. And luckily, my job is extremely flexible, flexible, and my manager is amazing.


So I got to take all the time off that I needed. And it's been awesome. It's a that's how I guess I ended up here. I you know, I'm not I don't I'm not the typical, I guess, engineer, I would say as well. Like, I like to do a lot of different things.


I'm not as nerdy as I guess most people would think an engineer is REIJO but so yeah, I consider myself pretty spontaneous too. So it's I'm glad I did it though, for sure.


Did you watch the show before going on? So I've seen like episodes of where I know Rachel's season was actually the first one I know I've seen like a few episodes of I know I didn't watch the whole thing, but I want to say I probably watch an episode of my mom back in the day maybe. And then my ex-girlfriend used to watch it. I never paid attention. But once I first got got the first call, I started paying attention to a season for sure just to understand what was going on.


Like, I, I need I'm one of those people. Yeah. I kind of needed to be prepared a little bit to see what was going to happen before I got a show. So I watched Peter Season and then I also went back and watched Hannah Brown's. First night just to see what the entrances look like to figure that whole thing out. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's the extent of what I've what I knew about the show, really.


OK, before we really get into I mean, because we have a lot of questions to ask you about hometowns, because that's obviously what we just watched. But I want to get into first because we didn't really see much of you when it was still class time on the show, you were a little bit more quiet, a little bit more reserved. But the second Tatia entered the room and it was officially announced as your new bachelorette, your energy completely switched a complete 180.


You just, like, seem to light up from within. So and we don't need to get into, like, the time prior to that. But what was it like waiting in the house? Not like after Claire left waiting for potentially a new bachelorette, not knowing what was going on and then meeting Tatia for the first time? No, it was it was awesome, it was like a little bit nerve wracking because we just went through what we went through.


But I remember there were probably like a few of the guys we thought it was going to turn into Bachelor in Paradise, to be honest. So we were just excited for whatever. But I remember telling a couple I remember telling a couple of the guys I was like, you know, it could be bachelor paradise. I'll be great. But honestly, all it takes is one girl and to be The Bachelorette. And that's going to get me excited, too.


And that's all it took. And it arrived. And as soon as she walked in that door, I know I was the first person to hug her. I was the most excited guy in that room that night to somebody like who I felt like I kind of already knew. I feel like we have similar backgrounds. And I just knew and I even said it that night. I was like, I'm in here. I'm going to be here for the long haul.


And I think a lot of guys were kind of taken aback by it all because they all had this idea that the rankings of Claires people was going to stay the same rotation. And I was like, no, this is completely different. Good luck to you guys, because I know him to be here for a while, to be on.


Oh, I love it. I love the the confidence. So what was it that made you say? Tatia and I have very similar backgrounds. Well, one thing I guess, that we connected with on our one on one was that we're both biracial, have black dads, and then our moms are actually both immigrants. Her mom's from Mexico, my mom's from the Philippines. And we did speak about that as well. And that was one thing. Another thing we can connect on how we can relate to both cultures.


And then on top of that, she's from Orange County and I'm from Plano, Texas, which is like a really nice area, which is probably a little bit some of the Orange County. And I feel like I've met a lot of people like Teisha, I would say. So I felt like to some degree I kind of knew her. And I've dated a lot of different women of all races, all backgrounds and whatnot. But like I'll say, the majority have been like kind of in like the Taisho realm, more so.


So she was your type? Yeah, she yes. She was more of my type, I would say.


My preference. Yeah.


Well, if we couldn't tell from the smile the second she walked in real quick. Yeah.


I want to keep going. No, yeah, I actually had to catch myself after one of my interviews that night and I was like, oh boy, I need to calm down. I'm a little too excited.


I know it was a lot of excitement, though, because I was just I was just ready to get things going.


Well, you were literally glowing and you were like bouncing in the chair, just smiling. I was like, oh, this is ready for this one.


So taking them back to your one on one, because that's really where we first obviously got to know you. And the fact that I love about it is like you guys weren't traveling. There was no exotic destinations, there's no fancy gimmicks. It was just like one of the most chill down to earth, but memorable one on ones that we've ever, ever seen on the show for however many seasons it's been going on. A thousand now, basically.


And that's, I think, based solely on you opening up about your vulnerability to have these important conversations and to really talk about what's not only going on with yourself and in your life, in your background, but with the world.


And so I want to start with the story of your brother. How did you feel being able to share that part of your life with Teisha? Was it nerve wracking? How did it feel after you had this conversation to take us back to that night? Yeah. So that night, honestly, first, just first of all, it started out great, like I love game nights and I told Tatia that actually one of the earlier cocktail parties like Game Nights are my thing, just hanging out with my friends, playing all types of games, whatever you can think of.


Those are like my favorite nights just doing that and drinking and having a good time. And then for us to have that first meant a lot to me because it was just so much fun that we could just, like, really relax and be ourselves. And then later on, I knew I wanted to share the story with my brother because, you know, in this short amount of time, you really have to explain and show the person that you truly are friends.


And to do that for me, I had to tell them the story of my brother that shaped me in more ways than pretty much anything in my life. So I felt like I really needed to do that. It was a little bit nerve wracking because I'll tell you, like some of my best friends honestly don't even know, like my younger brother was in prison because I keep a lot of that in. So it was a little bit nerve wracking, but it was definitely something I wanted to share and I knew I had to share for you to really understand kind of who I am a little bit.


Yeah, I mean, that conversation was like a conversation we've never seen before on on The Bachelor franchise and I we we spoke about it at great length here on a Bachelor happy hour. And one of the things we said was we really appreciated you being vulnerable, which is what Becca was talking about, but also just the way you were able to speak about the situation because you admitted your own faults and how you used to think about things, which I thought was very honest, because a lot of people can't do that.


You said all I used to think of it this way until I had somebody close to me who was a part of the system. And then I started to see it in a totally different way. And I thought that was very eye opening and refreshing to see because not everybody has the power to be able to do that. One of the things that we talked about on the podcast is that we felt like you carried the conversation. It seemed very and back and I have received little benefit from this.


But it's true. It's how we felt. I was blown away by you. We were like you and your honesty. I want to know how you felt in that moment, because obviously we are we weren't privy to the entire conversation. There was obviously more that was said. How did you feel in that moment? Yes, that that that moment was great and, you know, it just it just came so naturally, honestly, for the both of us.


But yeah, with me, I. I did see a lot of hesitation when it came to Tatia and for myself, I know like throughout my whole life, I've always been very introspective and taken a lot of time to think deeply about a lot of topics and do research to form my own opinions on things. And to be honest, not everybody that has spent that amount of time, I would say, and and my dad's done a good job of making sure I'm keenly aware of black issues in America, especially with my dad being a little bit older.


He's seventy three. He's lived through a lot of crazy stuff. So he's told me a lot of stories. So growing up, I knew a lot of different things and was keenly aware of our nation and and and black issues, especially this year for sure. So no, I just appreciate it in that moment for just being open and honest, because that's what I think she was doing. You know, not everybody is going to be able to just speak at length on term on these types of things or give dissertations on black issues in America and whatnot.


And I don't expect everybody to, to be honest. But as long as you're aware that things are happening and you're being open and honest about the way you view things, then that's all I can ask for from her that moment for sure.


First of all, I appreciate your father setting the example of recognizing the fact that you're biracial. Right. Like, I'm not biracial, but I will have biracial children. And I take and I I just think it's so admirable that he recognized that. You do have you come from two different cultures, but always reminding you of who you are, always reminding you that if you get pulled over when people see you, this is what they're going to see first and then they may not understand the other side of you.


I appreciate that. And I think that it's something that you said about, you know, you appreciate appreciated that being aware of what's going on. I guess I feel like as a black woman. I need you to be more than aware, and I think this was like kind of the issue in watching it, would you expect or maybe want more from someone that you're establishing a relationship with? Would you want them to be more cognizant of who they are when they navigate this world?


And maybe you can give me a different perspective, because I recognize I'm I'm black and black. You are biracial. So maybe you can give a different perspective of what it is to navigate the world as a biracial person that I can't you know, you're making a great point.


Right. But to be frank and honest, I honestly just grew up in a bubble, I feel like and she's kind of, you know, and I could kind of see that and sense that from her. What she's able to do going forward is what matters the most. But kudos to you, because you truly did, I think, carry that conversation and I want to go and because you spoke about your dad and I will say this, so after watching hometowns with your family and we all talked to all of us and said we Rachel and I talked about this before you hopped on about how I was, I think, one of our favorite hometown dates.


I was at this lunch. It was just the fact that you guys were cooking and drinking wine in the kitchen seemed so down to earth and your family was so beautiful and lovely. When I did write in my notes, your dad kind of reminded me of my father. So my dad is also well, was he passed away, but he was older. So he was actually the same age as your dad. But your father and I feel like we don't always see this with parents on the show because I think they be like, oh, we just want our son or daughter to be happy.


And this is like really cool, unique experience. But your dad was so realistic and down to earth, and I liked that he kind of kept you grounded when he saw you. That was something really special. So I love that interaction because it just, you know, it gave me all the feels. But the real surprise of your hometown date wasn't seeing your parents.


It was seen your brother. And the show doesn't make me cry very often. And I was sobbing like a baby watching this moment go down. So when he walked out. Give me everything you're feeling. Thank you. When you first saw him again after two months. I got to be honest. Yeah, I was only anticipating my parents being there, and that's what Chris told me and. When Chris told me that my mind, just because I've kind of been trained to think this way, it just went to dark places of like something bad happen to my brother because we are close.


And I knew he would be there for me if he could. So I was just extremely nervous that something terrible happened and he ended up back in prison or honestly even potentially dead. To be honest, that's something we've been dealing with before. He was in prison during he was in prison and after he struggles from a lot of mental health issues and like I said, a little bit of addiction and depression and all that kind of stuff. So it's hard to work through.


So I was just I was just I was just very nervous, I would say. But when he actually showed up there, it was just such a such a nice relief to be able to actually see him. And, you know, there's times honestly, he's only been at that point, he was only out of prison for about a year. And we've had trials and tribulations even just that year he's been out. But that was the first time I've seen him on a trip.


He's he's been on a trip or in a different state in years, like since we were little. So it's just it was just such a shock to have him there. I'm sure he was enjoying his experience there. And he just means the world to me. I've said this multiple times, but he's the most influential person in my life. He's the person. If he was like me, I honestly might be like a little bit in the bubble and not be so open to people who have gone through issues and whatnot.


So he's just opened my eyes, you know, going to different rehabs with him and participating in sessions and whatnot and hearing other people's stories just to be more understanding and less judgmental of everyone in the world, to be honest. So he doesn't take enough credit for that. And he'll always say, like, I'm just the greatest big brother in the world, but he's the greatest younger brother to just by being himself.


OK, I get emotional right now. What is your reaction when he walks? So I love his reaction to because you hear the door open and she just looks at you like, oh my God, it's happening and it's like it doesn't register with you. You're like, wait, what? And you go from this laugh to this cry like you see the emotion change. Like I can't believe this is happening to oh my gosh, it's happening. Oh, Ivan is everything I am curious to know because you've been so honest about what your brother has gone through.


How is your brother right now and how is he been knowing that you have been I'm sure you got his blessing, but just that you've been talking about, like the things that he's been through. I just I don't know how he's feeling about it. And how is he doing now? Sure. Yeah.


My brother and I are very close. We talk all the time and he understands that he has helped shape the person I've become today. So he knows I need to be able to express that to whoever I want to potentially get married to, because that's how I'm doing this at that point. So I definitely had his blessing for sure. And on top of that, my brother and I have talked about potentially starting charities and ways of giving back because of his experience in prison.


Like I said on the show, it's. When we go visit him, he would tell me some crazy stuff that's happening in prison like that, nobody else. He wouldn't tell that to anybody else. My mom would go step away or my mom and dad would go step away and bring his daughter away. And we'd have those intense talks where he's like sometimes breaking down and telling me these things he's actually having to deal with. And I'm trying to coach him through it.


But there's not much you can do through a glass wall. And then when I leave, I just feel so helpless. So there's there's just so much that he's learned going through that experience. And and quite frankly, like I said with George Floyd, police brutality has been brought to the forefront of the society here in America. The thing that me and him both recognize is that correctional officer, brutal brutality is not really talked about at all. That's a situation where there are nobody in the prison system or jails who have cameras to record what's going on.


If you do something, it's completely handled by the correctional officers. They get the judge, jury and executioner, all that stuff and decide your fate. There's no visibility whatsoever. So without any visibility, there's there's no way we can, like, track what's going on or hold people accountable at all, especially without a third party. So those are all major problems. We've we've known and have recognized and prisoners, the majority of them come back to society and to be going through abuse in there and honestly not having the correct rehabilitation type activities going on in there.


It's just not good for America as a whole, honestly. So there's a lot of changes that I think needs to happen. This is the prison capital of the world in America, is we hold a vast majority of prisoners compared to all the other developed countries, especially the Scandinavian countries. So there's a lot of improvement to be done there. And and with my brother's knowledge from the inside and then like with what I want to do with philanthropy going forward and charities and whatnot, we'll definitely want to make a change in that space.


And OK, this is why I love having you guys on the podcast, because there is so much that not only we can learn from you, but that all of our listeners can learn from you. And I guarantee a majority of the listeners probably have no idea. And I don't want this probably have no idea of all the things that are really, truly going on. And and this is why it's so good, as you said, to educate yourself and to immerse yourself in something that you don't see on a daily basis to learn more and grow from.


And so incredible. Incredible. One thing I want to touch on, switching gears a little bit here is your adorable niece, the adorable.


We can't we can't not talk about hometowns like the what is the best chef Filipino chef. Was it that you did? Yes. Set her up. Yes. She's she's just had her fifth year birthday. And, you know, I think she'll really appreciate that moment later going forward as she realizes what actually happened. My mom and and his mom are very like they do. They're very hands on and do everything with her. So the fact that they were able to get a video of her cooking lumpia, which is something that my mom cooked for me my entire life, really meant a lot to me.


And I I really wanted to kaylani to be there more than anything. But she couldn't make the trip, which was it, which was fine, that video enough. And that brought a giant smile on my face. Kilani She was born, like I said on the show. She was born while my brother was in prison. So she had her mom there in her mom's. Great, amazing. But me and my parents definitely to step up and step into her life.


And she always wanted to make sure she had that father figure there for her as well. And Dad and I always wanted my brother to know that she's taking care of no matter what happens, because I'm always going to take care of her and look at her as my own. So I haven't Kaylani son in that video is the cutest thing ever. She's the cutest little girl. She's like the background on my phone and I love her. If I'm ever feeling down, I just have to look at a picture of her and I'm good.


I'm going to go after that loving. She's so cute.


I was listening to you speak about her. It just it gives me chills and so special, I feel like. I have no idea what happens the rest of this season after this hometown date, but I feel like you would be ready for kids.


So this this. Yeah, I'll say this, I, I could definitely handle kids now, but I definitely want to enjoy traveling and doing something to my partners for kids, to be honest.


How often do you have. Kilani. It varies. She lives about three hours away right now, so I probably see her once a month maybe. But before that she lived at my parents house with her mom for about a year. So I saw her all the time then. So it's always a treat to see her, though, especially now that she's getting her personality. She's always been pretty shy and now she's finally getting the personality. So she's a TV star now?


That's right.


Yes, she's about to be. You created a monster, Ivan.


We we get to see so many great things about you on the show. And one of the other things is that you tend to stay out of the drama if you're not involved. There's a lot of drama surrounding you, especially with the switch of bachelorettes and the men and all of this. It's a lot. Um, who are you close with in the house? Oh, yes, of course, with a lot of guys, but first and foremost, DeMar was probably my best friend from the show.


He we were roommates the longest, actually, and nobody just allowed us to talk a lot more. And he's such like a ball of energy. And like probably the most positive guy in the house especially is like a spin instructor. He's got great energy.


Got to be positive. He's the best at telling stories. You could be like a narrator, honestly, a podcast host or even a DJ. He's got great music sense. So I was closest with the bar, but I was close with a lot of guys. I was really close with or still am close with Noah Riley, Jordan Chapman, quite a few of the guys, Spencer, even I know I'm missing a couple, but quite a few of the guys I still keep in touch with.


I'm assuming you're part of the group chat. Like, what do you guys call yourselves? The Sweet 16. Did we name it? We named it. Well, I think we have on. That sounds like the sweet 16 group.


Probably you guys whenever when Clear left a lot of the guys like the named as the Sweet 16. And if you guys were there, like listening to us, everybody was saying they were going to get sweet 16 tattoos and whatnot. And I was just being quiet because I was like, I don't want to talk to you, but everybody was down for it. It was hilarious. But yeah, it's the sweet 16 of those like Kenny.


Kenny was leading the charge on that totally like, oh, he wanted to start Tatis. We had the same conversation when I was on our asses and I remember how many of us were left, maybe like 14. We went to Paris and we all thought it would be a good idea to get Rose Tattoo. Thank God we didn't thank God for what I think that's been done.


I feel like somebody did that. My group of girls, we were like, it's cool here, but I don't know if I really don't know y'all like that when we spoke to several of them.


But now I know Demara has a rose tattoo. You know, he's the only one who I think got one actually after the show, we got one. You go going to tell me it's like a big one. Not like it's like a big one all across. OK, I appreciate that. I appreciate that.


Now he committed to it. He's committed to it.


You see him, though, like as a spin instructor saying, you know, back in my time when I was in Palm Springs at the Lockington, you just got to say, because you can't you can't determine, you know, have you ever seen a spin instructor? I could totally hear the pellets out of my head. You got to stay focused. You can't worry about these other men that are distracting you. Oh, my whole thing.


I'm telling you the best that is. Oh, I look back. I'll let you ask your final question. Yes, I was done. Yeah, yeah. So I we asked this of every guest because it's and the answers vary greatly. But what was your rose and your thorn of the entire season up until this point?


Up until hometown's. OK. Who? For what's OK, OK. OK, I got you. So my thought I know my one thought actually this is my only complaint that I have. I don't complain about much honesty because I was just so grateful for the experience. But the heat there was ridiculous. The temperature in Palm Springs was ridiculous. I couldn't deal with it. It's like if you go outside and shoot for a little bit and I'm sweating like crazy, eventually I started to learn like, hey, I always carry a towel because this is ridiculous.


I just got to wipe off all the time. So that sucked, to be honest. But either way, I don't want to come off as like I'm complaining because I was just very thankful to be there. The roads up to that point. Yeah, I guess it's just got to be the family, the hometown, the hometown, it's got to be that just had so many different elements. The fact I got to share like my Filipino culture with Asia and just cook some of those awesome for me with Kaylani coaching us through that.


And then and then the fact my mom, my brother and my dad were able to show up at my core family, and that just meant the world to me, that they were all there to support me. And I loved every minute of that. What we did to it was we have truly enjoyed watching you on the show because you've taken it up a notch, like you've really raised the bar when it's come to the show, you've. We've had when we've been able to have conversations that I don't know, prior to 20, 20 we would have ever been able to have on The Bachelor franchise and back and Ibold speak out about the need for diversity and the need for change and the need for growth.


And I'm happy that through the conversation that you initiated, we were able to see that. I mean, naming people who were killed at the hands of the police on ABC said, you know, it was it really was powerful. And I hope, you know, you understand I'm sure you didn't in the moment because you were just being yourself and saying how you were feeling. But I hope you see that it was a big deal now that it's out there.


Yeah, no, I know. I really appreciate that. And to be honest, I was definitely aware and I've been listening to us for a while now, actually, ever since, like, I started the casting process and and hearing you speak about things. Rachel back, I really appreciate you guys for bringing stuff up. I remember you guys had a podcast specifically about talking about the world and whatnot. And I listen to that and, you know, the whole batch diversity campaign and all that kind of stuff, like I read through the things that they had.


So I was keenly aware of what was happening and and myself being half black and Asian, I kind of I did like a quick check. I haven't seen any other black and Asian person on the show before. So I was like the first person to represent people who look like me specifically and, you know, and especially having to show there. That's what I think really allowed me to like relate to her with us both being biracial and especially as it was in the summertime.


So, like things had just happened. And I know I spent a ton of time reflecting and taking notes and making all these project plans for like all these ideas I have. That's just what I do in those types of moments. And so it's just stuff so fresh on my mind. And I wanted to be a part of the change in destination. I'm really glad that it was received. Well, I'm honestly shocked I haven't got too much backlash at all.


Like, I was actually really shocked for just for just having a regular conversation. So I'm very happy with the way it was received and I'm very happy that I got to start potentially a new trend in destination.


Can I tell you, Taylor Nolan is doing a series about biracial contestants? I think she started in August. Actually, I don't know if you're aware of it, but through her podcast with biracial contestants that have been on the show and it's really good if you haven't checked it out already. I do that because she's definitely been great at, like, leading the charge of that experience.


So I really I really appreciate that. And I actually have heard that. And yes, she had like four different shows or episodes of that. And there was another person in destination. I didn't follow too many people honestly, prior to coming onto the show. I think it was like yourself, Rachel and maybe Taylor and maybe Ashley Spidy. I think something like that. And Taylor and I have actually connected since after the show. And she's somebody I appreciate is always just being herself, which I appreciate the most.


I like it when people are just being themselves and not regretting it at all or apologizing for that. Yeah.


Yeah. Well, I've been it has been an absolute pleasure. You set this bar now for for the franchise as a whole. And I can only hope that we take it up a notch season by season and keep going. So thank you for sharing your story on national television, for sharing your family and the relationship that you have with them, with all of us. And just for being on our podcast today, we're so happy to have you. Now, I'm honored and I really appreciate you guys having me honestly, it's it feels like a dream come true, honestly, because I've just heard you guys on the podcast for a while now.


And meeting you guys is awesome. So I really appreciate it.


Thank you. Thank you for that support. Yeah, of course. Of course. Ivan writes, So so we owe this mess, and I guess he like I liked him before and we've talked about this at length, like after his one on one, he grew on me so, so much.


But just having him here today, right now, the amount of chills that I got for this entire conversation, he's incredible. Incredible.


It was him talking about because like, that's what you want to hear when he said, hey, you know, like with Teisha, I want to see what she does moving forward, hearing him talk about the things he wants to do moving forward, how he's like I've been reflecting and I've been thinking, how can I help out with this? Bringing awareness to the abuse from correctional officers and have been fighting for people who are behind bars. I mean, just the level of activism, the level of the desire to want to do better and make changes in our society.


I really appreciate the conversation and I love that you can tell that I'm talking about George Floyd. That's just the tip of the iceberg. There's so much depth there. Yes.


Like, I have no doubt he is going to be doing big, incredible things from here on out. And I'm in a weird way, like even though, yes, it's a reality TV show, I'm glad now that he has this platform to do so, because had we not have had him on. And how do you not shared this story about his brother and speaking out about George Floyd like Bezzerides, you would have had none of that this season and it's so needed.


And so I can't wait to see what he does from here on out. And he did not disappoint.


No, he didn't. He's a good one. So. All right, you guys. Well, getting down to the wire, we officially have only two episodes left this season, which I know we keep saying it seems like it's dragging on and on and on. But we have two episodes left before the finale, so we're dying to know how the season ends for Tasha. I truly like we try to guess week by week. And at this point, I have no clue how it turned out so well.


Next week we're going to be on Monday and Tuesday back to back. So please make sure that you're following along and watching with us. Yes. And also make sure to keep up with us on social. You know where to find us at best. Or happy hour on Instagram or at that happy hour on Facebook and Twitter. And last but not least, you guys don't forget to subscribe to our podcast on Apple podcast, Spotify, the one free app or wherever you're listening to this right now.


Hi, guys.