Right there, that's the story of me about, yeah, what is it they ever had a baloney sandwich? Hominine hot, hominine hot. Hi, everybody. Hello, hello. Well, what a year this week has been.

Oh, Lord, what a decade. What a decade, what a century we have lived through in the past. And have I died?

You die in your back. I'll be like, hello again. Yes, hello again.

Literally every day I pass away and every day my ghost comes back to see what's going on.

I have I have been reborn many times this week myself. Well, thanks for joining us.

Friends at home. This is busy. Phillips is doing her best. I am the aforementioned busy Phillips joined by case the U.S. on Hello and Sentier. Hello, Jackson in our new apartment with no boxes. I'm impressed you've already unpacked so much.

No, no. The boxes are hidden. Yeah, OK, the flicks look at this. All the boxes are OK. Well, just like the last two weeks you've just had like behind you so many boxes. It looks like a week.

Yeah. Like everything's in the kitchen and then the rest of it is chilled, like clothes are going away. I'm just going to take my time putting those in the closet. But the kitchen had to be unpacked and the TV has been mounted and everything else in between. We could take our sweet time. Would you say that's what you've done your best at this week?

Santara Oh, man. I mean, let's say let's just keep it personal for the first bit, because we all know. Yes, I, I would say yes, this has been the thing that I've done the best and I I'm actually going to decorate this apartment. I every time I was in my 20s, I knew I would be moving away and I wouldn't put anything on the wall. So this is great. I got to decorate this one like a real person.

I mean, it's like an adult move. The apartment already looks beautiful. It's clean, white and it looks.

Yes, lovely in there from our our darker, abysmal, box riddled pictures. Everyone wants to know where's the bunny's house? Where. Oh, OK. So this is fine. We have a bathroom buddy. Now we just go we just have Joona the bathroom because it's big. She likes to live under the toilet and then we just like baby proof that so we leave the door open and she just like lives in our pretty big bathroom.

All right. You know, we have bathroom cats. Yeah. Cats that, like, prefer to live in a bathroom. Yeah.

Lot of people will ask, yeah. Like, where are your cats? Why do you only post pictures of Gina? And I'm like, well, because the cats really just enjoy being in the bathroom.

I don't know what to tell you. I've literally never seen your cats. So we left the door open when there wasn't anything around to see what she'd do. And she like went under the bed for like five minutes. And then she went back in the bathroom, went to the toilet. She had choices and that is what she wanted. Well, that's the same with Gilda and Rosie, except they have less choices. They do like to pop on furniture.

And I have to say that's not acceptable. And I love that this house. So you have to and we've tried I've given them the things to pop on the scratching post and stuff, but they do actually really like their bathroom.

It's a big part of driving. They're kind of thriving. It sounds like your bunnies thriving. I'm happy your kitchen's unpacked. That's a big deal.

I know I made some bacon this morning. Hey, Brad, Brad coming back. Are you going to do some some bread this weekend or. No, not yet.

I just saw her eating store bought bread.

Oh, that's your spot. But drag me Casey. I did. I ate some store by brioche. But here's the thing. Brioche is a bread that I do not want to make because it takes six egg yolks and so much flour that you have. You make it yourself. You spend twice as much as if you bought it in the store. So I lied at the store. I will I will never make a brioche.

Can I tell you something? The best dessert I ever had was a brioche bun with a slice of like chocolate ice cream from a from a pint container. And then just powdered sugar is the best thing I ever had.

Yeah. You know what cricket's dessert of choice is? What a king's Hawaiian roll cut in half with a layer of Nutella in between. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. That's good. I like I like a little piece of toast with Nutella and some apple slices on it, so I like it like something my mom would have eaten in the eighties.

I mean, I love cheese and I like that it was like that would have been like that's like. It's seven points on my clock. I got a little charcuterie, I do I do have a mom vibe from the 80s for sure.

General Casey, what are you doing your best at personally this week? We're not talking about world events or whatever, but yet I didn't really do shit this week.

You know, like I was just like everybody just like doom scrolling. So many people sent me messages after I cried on the podcast last week because it's out of character for me to cry. So thank you very much to everyone for being so kind to me. So obviously, like rough times continued into this week where I'm just trying to figure out my life. So I do this thing that I call the walls, which is like a wall, is like one, two, three, one, two, three.

So my one, two, three is like I do something that I have to do. Then I do something that I want to do and then I do something for somebody else. And so I just keep like repeating one, two, three, one, two, three, until I feel better or, you know, something time until this Christmas present.

I got you a present, but I just I just found this thing handmade by artisans in Kazakhstan. Kazakhstan, your purchase empowers women in Kazakhstan reducing reduces global poverty and supports fair trade.

Stamped by the Fair Trade Federation. So, all right, it is a handmade oh, it's look you look ornament.

That's so cute and I love it. Thank you. Well, the star of my Christmas tree this year will be he will be mailed to you. This is not the first prince ornament I have purchased for Casey. And it won't be the last. It's true.

Yeah. My whole tree will eventually be all prince because people make them every year and send them. And I feel so lucky to be on everybody's list of, you know, who you got in the tree.

I should have a tree just like a mini purple tree. And it's all the I mean, I love it.

I'm willing to do it, do it this year. This year. I mean, honestly, I was just going to say that I saw online that someone was like, I put my Christmas tree up. And I think that, like, we I like a real tree. I have always tree. But like, I was like, should I get a small fake one and just put it in here now, like YOLO?

Yeah. I'm really going to make it. I like I could really use a Christmas tree.

You know, I have color changing lights that we put up and we usually put them up starting at Halloween and then they're orange and then we'll keep them through Thanksgiving and like maybe transition into like a warm white. And then Christmas is multi-color. And then for New Year's, they're blue. And then for Valentine's they're pink. And I guess we could go into, like, even St. Patrick's Day being green. But at that point, I feel like you're really pushing it with your neighbors.

But it really does. Like, you know, Mariah Carey loves a festive moment and I can see where she's coming from. Yeah, I love my statement.

I might just get a Christmas tree. Yeah, I'm in support also. Like, who knows what's going to happen. This might be the last Christmas I enjoy for a minute. I might have to do it early. I might have to fake it.

Well, guys, I'm all for early Christmas. Late Christmas, leaving things up year round. You know, my mom puts those snow babies up starting the second of October.

So all that snow baby has so many snow babies over over two hundred and fifty, I believe is where we're at now.

Wow. I'm going to miss this year.

I really what's the street value of two hundred and fifty snow. Not a lot.

I you know, I love your mom so much and I bet she's like lovingly thinking like in her mind, like one day who shall pass each snow baby on to. Well, wait, you don't know.

I don't even know if I can bring this up. This is like a major fight in our family. I didn't talk to my mom for like a month about this.

No, baby. Yes. I think I've heard this story. Yeah. You must have heard this story because, Leon, like we may have talked about it. Your sister Leon. Yeah, my sister Leon worked on Busy Tonight as one of our producers.

But you may have heard this story while she while we were together because it was like a family breakdown of epic proportions that like one of those things where it was like a small thing that illuminated so many different dynamics. And I was like so angry.

And it was, of course, not just about snow babies, but it never seen snow babies.

It's never. Oh, my God. That I want that. Oh, my God. That's my T-shirt. Guys, we've been having these merch conversations. Submit what you really want to see for merch. I want it's never just about snowboarding that we just said.

It's never just about snow, baby. It's never just about snow, baby.

It's truly so. Anyway, I'm not going to get into the particulars. We'll just I'll save this whole thing for book to. Yeah. That well but but yeah.

So Snow Baby is celebrate celebrate it if you got it in you, if you want to sell it, if it makes you feel good, celebrate. Have Thanksgiving next weekend guys. I don't know what to tell you. Live your lives. Don't forget to vote. We still have to show up. You know, we're just all doing that thing still. I'm just going to keep saying it and still. But I want talk about my job. Yes.

Congratulations. Congratulations. OK, so OK. So we know because if you listen to the podcast, hopefully this is your first one. You know that I had a meltdown and I was like, I got to go to New York. I just was like, we have to go to New York. So two weeks ago, we had ordered this like the most amazing carnitas from this place here. It's so. Good, but like I'm sure a lot of you, if you have been ordering takeout, if you've been having your food delivered to the house because you're trying to minimize your exposure and going out into public, things don't show up.

You order, you know, I mean, like it's not right. Like, I just in the last I would say the first three months, we ordered zero and then we started ordering again. And then I read that thing that Foushee wrote that was like, go ahead and order food. I ordered whatever. So now I order in food and I'm fine with it.

But I would say that like 80 percent of the time, the orders wrong, shouldn't you? I don't know. I mean, I hear that begins right. But I also am ordering like a Jamaican beef patty and it's like it's hard to put that you can't mess it up.

You just put it back. Oh, well, I just mean, like, I've had like once we ordered, you know, from our favorite Mexican place in L.A. and there were no chips with the guacamole. I'm like, oh, then you're like, I have the store bought chips in my pantry. But what I want are those restaurant deep fried fresh chips. Anyway, so this time two weeks ago, we ordered carnitas from this incredible place here that we love and there's no tortillas.

And I like had just had one of these days with the kids and the stress and thing and whatever in the world. And I was like, I fucking need tortillas.

And Mark has a weird thing that bugs the shit out of me where he doesn't like to call establishments or he doesn't like to complain about anything or set appointments or he doesn't like to talk to people that he doesn't know. So so I have to do it. And I was like, angry about that. And then also the place is like not close to us. So even if we got tortillas, by the time we got them, the duck carnitas would be cold.

And I don't know, I was just like annoyed at the whole thing. But there is a Mexican place around the corner here. And I was like, you know what?

I'm just going to get my bag and go get tortillas from that place. And it was a whole thing, but I was like, I need the tortillas. It would be it was like, you know, sometimes you just gotta fucking you commit and you follow through what was a little bit like, don't, you know, don't make this the hill.

You're going to die on a river. I'm like, I'm not I just I need the fucking tortillas. So I got got my purse are so annoyed. I walked around and of course the guy's like, yeah, great. It'll be like fifteen, twenty minutes for twenty. I was like, oh OK.

Well here's the truth guys. I felt embarrassed when I was just going to order tortillas because it's like a restaurant and restaurants are struggling and the guy seemed so nice.

So then I also ordered guacamole and I also ordered churros and I also ordered a cheese quesadilla for no reason at all, except that I just felt weird ordering just for tortillas. So that's why I had to wait twenty minutes. I'm standing outside waiting on the curb far away from everyone. And I just was looking through my phone scrolling as one does. And I've been trying to avoid the social means of late because it's just, you know, such a dumpster fire.

And I was looking through my texts because I've been really bad at communication with people recently and I haven't been responding to things. And I'm like, what? Who should I respond to? And I had this text from Tina Fey from that morning that was like, hey, give me a call when you get a chance.

I have a weird work question for you. And I had said, oh, try me at this time. And she had but we had been recording our podcast, so I didn't pick up. And then she texted me again, like, just call me tonight. If you get this, like earlier in the day and I hadn't called her, it was like eight thirty at night.

And she and I were like the kind of friends that I wouldn't just, like, call her without first daylighting.

Yeah, you know what I mean. Like some and and and also because she was like essentially our boss and like, I respect her deeply and like, you know, all of those things. But I was just standing there on the corner waiting my twenty minutes, annoyed about the carnitas tortilla situation and Mark's refusal to call places. And I was like, fuck it, I'll just call her. So I call her and she picks up immediately. She's like, Oh, I'm so glad you called.

I was like, oh, is it too late? I'm sorry. No, no, no. Listen, listen. So we have this TV show. I don't know if you know about it, but there was this part we always, like, thought of you for it. We always, like, wanted you to do it. But because this was like, you know, six months ago, five months ago, we're putting this to the starting to write the show and stuff.

And it's like covid. And you have two kids and they're in school in L.A.. I wasn't going to ask you to move to New York. I wasn't even going to ask you to, like, entertain the idea because I know. And also, Eric says you're retired from acting. I know you don't want to act, but it just kind of perfect for you. And I don't know, I was just thinking about it like you're here. Do you want to just stay and do the.

The show and. I was sort of like, this is the first time this is literally in my twenty two year career as an actor, that this call has ever fucking happened.

And I swear to God, I was like. What what's happening? What are you what are you asking me, what is it, what's happening? And she's like, let me just send it to you. You can read it. You just read it. Just take a look and see if it's something you're interested in. And I was like, what?

What's what are you like? I wouldn't have to do anything. You could just I could just have you would just I could just do it only maybe offer only just like just look at it.

Just look at it like just see if you want to, just see if you want to do it. Just see if you're you're interested. And and I was like, well what's the premise. And she's like, oh so it's so we already have Sarah breathless and and Renee Elise Goldsberry, you know, from Hamilton. I was like, yeah of course I know.

And then she's like, OK, so the premise is it's like a 90s girl group who essentially like tries to stage a comeback in their forties. And I'm like, am I baby spice Tina, my baby spice? And she's like, yeah, you're essentially yes. You're essentially like the baby spice up the thing. But anyway, I'll send you all your mail to you. You read it. We just let me know tonight because they are casting it in L.A. tomorrow.

They're doing like the studio and network and stuff. So I do want to just like know if this is something I was like, oh yeah, sure. Just me. OK, I hang up and I was doing there and I on the curb and I started like kind of like hyperventilating. Like my dream in life is to be in a 90s girl group and and like not just not to, I mean, it's my dream in life is to be baby spice.

And I went to the concert in nineteen ninety eight dressed as Baby Spice, and I was like, what's, what's happening.

What am I what's happened.

What just happened. What just happened. And the guy's like your tortillas already. Right. I got it. I walked home. I opened the door. Mark's like, you got tortillas. I was like, yes. And it's a whole ordeal. And Tina Fey just offered me a job.

And what I'm just like and I passed out basically onto the ground. And then Mark was like, what did you say to her?

I said, well, she said she emailed me the script. And he's like, Do you need to read it?

And I'm like, No, I just fucking call her back. And I called her back and I was like, Do you know? So here's the thing. I don't need to read it. I just want to do it. I'm in I'd like to do it, please. Thank you so much. And she's like, okay, great, we'll get into it. And I was like, that's it. That's all. OK, all right. I'm doing OK.

That's it. And so that's the show. Girls five ever five. I'm excited for that show.

And we've done table reads on four of the episodes and we've done some we've heard some demos, musical demos, song.

Look at the universe being called. Oh yes, I know. It was really exciting.

So yesterday we had our. Zumtobel reads, But, you know, the Internet in this house is terrible, especially when the girls are doing school. You got to get hard wired. We're going to get you a dongle for that. I'm moving. I'm moving now. Yes. Well, either way, we can still get you a dongle for that. We're moving to a new place this weekend.

Hopefully the cricket will sleep in her own bed and everybody is excited about the new place. But and it'll have good Internet.

But so because the first table read that we did for the network and everything, my Internet kicked me off twice, which is awkward and not a great impression. I went into the little stranger offices yesterday and did the zoom from Tinas office, which she's not using. She's working from home, but. Anyway, so I went in and I did the zoom from her office, and it was it was really great and it's like all their offices are like all the way up, like almost to Central Park.

Yeah. After the table read was over, I was like, you know, it it's so beautiful. I'm feeling so good about things. I think I'm going to walk down all the way downtown. So I don't do that because in New York, Block is three times as big as everyone else's block. So it's like any time you decide to walk somewhere, there's like 18 streets in between. People cheering Yes. You bring up a really good point.

And I am definitely a West Coast bitch. Yeah. And but I was just like I also was very curious to see what Times Square was like.

Right.

So I wanted to, like, walk through that and see and, like, just sort of experience the city.

And and I thought, well, I'm not, you know, wearing heels, it'll be fine.

Oh, and then also because we're moving into this new place, which is like a partially furnished.

But I want to get some things like pillows.

Yeah.

Like stuff that's like, you know, and I thought, oh well I can stop at that at ABC Carpet and Home, which I've never been, and I've only eaten at the restaurants.

They sell HomeGoods and food. It's like IKEA, the famous carpet restaurant. It's the famous harbor.

There's well they have like three restaurants now.

They have ABC Kitchen, ABC Cucina, which is like the Mexican place, which is delicious.

And then they have a vegan restaurant next door I've only ever been. It's a very fancy store for people that don't know ABC Carpet Home. I've only ever been there for the Santa. Super deluxe Santa's holiday. Probably not this year, but it's like a legit Santa. Oh, well, let me tell you something, Cathy. I have never been into the HomeGoods part of it. And I was like, oh, it's kind of like anthropology, except 17 times more expensive.

Yes. And why am I buying this throw pillow here for four thousand dollars when I can buy it at Anthropologie for 40?

Yeah, that was my and listen, no shade to ABC, but I'll show it to ABC because what is too expensive for certain people who are not.

But also just me, but also just by an anthropology like it just always seem and get the messed up scene one from Martial's.

I need an anthropologist too rich for my blood. I'll be definitely buying the knockoff from I love I love.

Where's the longa from? Like a target target. A man selling it on the street off a table. That is true.

I have to say, I've really been trying to be cognizant and aware. You know this we've talked about it, aware of like where things are made and how made. And I don't want to add to garbage in the universe, you know.

So I do think that sometimes, like, I will forego like a less expensive option when I if I feel like I really like it's not made in a good way or I'm concerned about the practices of the company. Sure.

What I'm trying to stay away from fast fashion. You know, I've loved it in the past, but I understand its impact on the environment and also on humans. And I'm trying to. But it's also it sucks because. Not everyone can afford to not do fast fashion fashion. Yeah, you know what it looks like? It's it's a it's like between a hard rock and a hard place because it's like you have to do what you're able to do.

And I think that is the thing. It's like people who buy fast fashion aren't like, well, I only do this because fuck earth. Yeah, right.

And then, like, when you start to drill down, you know, like I'm thinking of like, you know, I love to read the comments on Instagram posts. I love to comment on Instagram clothing ads where I always say, like, oh, I would buy so many of these clothes if they were size inclusive. But you're leaving cash on the table because they only go up to large or whatever. Right. Which isn't true. I wouldn't buy any of those clothes because I shouldn't be spending money on clothes right now.

But I like to, like, make the point, the point that if I had money, I would buy those clothes if they were a size inclusive.

But a lot of times people will comment like this is fast fashion or like this isn't ethically made. And then someone will be like, fuck you a bit.

You're commenting on a phone that a child made in China, you know, so it's like it there's just layers. It's telescoping. There are so many layers. But I also refuse to believe that the eight thousand dollar cushions from ABC are that much better. No, absolutely more sustainably made than the ones that Anthropologie. Anyway, that's not the point. The point is, as I was walking around. I noticed that my heels. And my boots really hurt, like really hurt, like we're starting to really hurt and at this point I had walked.

Thirty blocks or 40 blocks, which is 18 miles. Why do I like yeah, I think I had walked two miles at this point and I was like, oh, my heels really hurt. So then I like hobbled out of ABC.

And I was like, oh no, this is like getting bad. I don't want to call an Uber. I'm probably like a mile from home still like, what am I going to do? My heels are like, I wonder if they're like pulling blood in my shoes.

So I kind of like walk another block, but that is the block that does me in. Yeah. And by the time I walk that block, I get to a point where I'm like walking so on the street.

But I'm also trying to like play it off. Like it's like I'm just I'm throwing down Broadway like a crazy person and there's a J Crew and I'm like, my savior. J. Crew has some sneaks. Exactly. H.A. Thank you. And so I hobel literally hobble into J. Crew and there is just no balance as far as the eye can see. I love new talent, apparently new balance, though. We got some issues right, because the guy supports Trump.

But at this point I'm like the fucking blister. I don't give a fuck. I need to get out of these boots. And I, like, ask the girl because it's mostly clothing. I'm like, is this the these are all the shoes? And she's like, well, actually the shoes are upstairs.

I'm like, are you kidding me? Like one tiny t shirt rolling my cheek.

I'm like, OK, so I. Slowly make their way up here and I get up there, I see the shoes, I'm like, thank God they're just right at the top of the stairs. I don't have to walk any further. I, like, grab the first new balance I see. And just, like, turn around trying not to move. And this is a woman who works there. And I make eye contact and she's like, I'll be right there.

I was like, OK, thank you so much. I was like, how many died in the house? She's like, OK, I'll be right back. And I'm looking around and, you know, it's still covid and I'm wearing a mask and I'm using hand sanitizer. But I'm like, is it safe to sit? I have to fucking sit down. I'm so I mean, so my heels are in so much pain. Also, I'm, like, terrified of what's going to happen when I take you off, because I am afraid that it's like going to be bloody.

Yeah. So I that last block was the block that did it. So I decided I'm going to take my chances. I sit down and she comes out and she's like, I'm so sorry, we don't have those a nine and a half, but we have these ones in a nine and a half. I was like, they're great. I'll take them. Thank you so much. So she hangs up to me and she's kind of like standing there.

And I was like, Oh, thank you. I OK. I mean, I'm just gone. I have to tell you, I'm sorry. So I tell her the whole thing and I'm like and I take my shoe off and they were black boots and I was wearing white socks and like because my feet were so like hot and sweaty. And you see, I'm so sorry. This is a foot store like Die from the Black Boots is like made the socks look really dirty, like it's so gross and weird.

And then I like peel my sock off the back of my heel like oh and half of my heel like goes with the sock and then I'm like, I think I'm going to buy new socks too. And she's like, OK, great. And I was like, I'm sorry, it's just been such a day. And she's like, OK, I never do this. Can I just tell you something? I am a huge fan and I but but more than that, I like love the podcast.

I have listened to it, I listen to it religiously. I'm in a group chat. I love it so much.

I like live chat. Yeah. Yes I like. And I'm like truly like I'm like pouring sweat, even though it's cold out, I have, like, bloody and like bloody heels, dirty socks, these boots that are like I'm never putting on my feet again and I'm, you know, disrobing on the floor of her establishment. And I was like, I feel like this is the most me you could ever meet me.

And she's like, this is really incredible. This is exactly what I ever thought you would be like.

I be your dreams come true. I really page from J.Crew. She's adorable.

We took a picture, I thought this week I've dropped the ball on the visual learners because I feel like all we've talked about is depressing ass politics. Shit. Yeah. And it's like, what? I don't want to post any of those pictures. Yeah, but this week we have Santeros new apartment. We have Casey and her. Prince Automan, consortium of Kaseem Prince, we have cases, Prince Tree that she's going to put up. You've got to put it up, you've got to put it up.

My mom's snow baby is we have my blistered heels. So many things. Me and Paige, I love that balance balances. And it really made me feel nice and she really likes her group chat, and she it made me feel like this was God doing this podcast was a good thing.

I love that. Yeah, I love the universe. It's like you found a human penny.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God, she would that be a T-shirt? I am a human. Oh, very abstract. Love it. Science that makes me really happy.

I was so nice. You would have loved her if she criticized inclusive. It is. I was just going to say I love J.Crew because their size inclusive.

So they make a mean blazer baby.

Yeah. They got the really bad, really cute stuff and they're also busy. I want to tell you, you might not know this, but I know this from when I moved to New York City to work for our guest today. Your feet grow in New York City. Why? I brought all my Doc Martens from like my teen years to New York City with me to be like a cool badass. And I had to buy all new shoes. I can't say I can't afford my feet growing.

They're already basically a size 10. And I lie and say it's a nine and a half.

I'm not even joking. I wore size eight shoe when I moved to New York and size ten by the time I moved. But you had two children. No, this is before children's eyes. No.

Oh, no. My feet are big. I wear a size eleven. I live in New York for two years almost. And I think that once I got to eleven my body tapped out. But you still got time to go busy. I guess I'll be an eleven by the time this show is over.

You can get some kinky boots. They come up to size thirteen probably. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

You know, Paris Hilton must have a shoe line that goes up that high. Well, they'll have a shoe line. I don't know. She does, but Paris Hilton, this is just like a weird thing that I appreciate her for when she got really famous. Paris Hilton is a size eleven, which is a very large size for women. Usually most fun to stay up at ten. I mean, she was like at her height of fame. She was on TV and she was like, yeah, I wear a size 11 and no one makes shoes for me.

Everyone sucks. And everybody started making shoes that went up to an eleven after she, like, complained about it. TRUMP Thank you, Paris Hilton. So shout out to Paris Hilton for that one thing. That's her. Yeah, her contribution, really, because I used to have to, like, be little and everything would be like a weird grandma flat when you're like in seventh grade. And then she got famous and they started making like cool like sneakers for us and nice little flats and stuff.

So, yeah. Shout out the parents for making it. Sounds fun. Is size inclusive shoes and also and also for stars are blind. Oh that's a bob. I mean it's a genuine Bob Dylan. Bob. Yeah. Well before we get to. Ah, yes, I was going to say, ah, huge gas, but like that, I don't. He's he's not small, he's tall person has this huge, huge cultural, culturally he's huge.

Culturally, he's huge, culturally tall.

So maybe he's you are his guest with with whom we had a very interesting conversation that went lots of different places.

But before we get to. Our guest, David Letterman. Do you guys want it? Do we even how do we what do we how are we what do we do?

This is what I want to say. This is truly what I want to say here. Again, everybody is always we're all reading the same complete nonsense constantly. I got the message. If you have an iPhone on every Sunday, you get a report in the morning about your usage for your phone. And my report is pretty out of control. And I just want everybody to know that it's OK. If the report you got says that you are on your phone seven hours more than usual, because every time I open my phone, somebody else had it.

Something new happened and I was completely in shock and all. So I just want to shout out to all my people whose screen usage doubled or tripled, quadrupled, that we don't count, don't worry about it. It's an outlier in the correlation police.

And it's also I put it down, it's OK to put it down and walk away from it. Like, I think people are like, I have to stay engaged and I have to stay involved. Like, listen, we can only take so much engagement, but I have had to close my phone and walk away a few times because, like, I'm I'm the kind of person that gets testy with, like, I can't survive without my GPS. I have a terrible sense of direction.

But once I get to my neighborhood and it tells me, like turn on to my street, I'm like, I know, I know, you know, like I get very bitchy being told things that I already know because I find it insulting, even though it's just a computer.

So like everybody's saying, like, ignore the polls, we still have to vote. Have you checked your registration? I'm like, yes, I know I've done all this. And I find myself getting really testy with having those messages like reiterated to me. But they're important messages. Just because I don't need to hear them doesn't mean that they're not important messages. So what I've been realizing is I really need to, like, shut it down and walk away.

So those two ends of the spectrum busy. Where are you? I'm closer to Casey TEEB. I'm finding more and more that it's not.

Particularly healthy for me to continually know every detail of this dumpster fire that is unfolding, I feel really sad for so many people who are like the unwitting victims of this stupidity, the whole White House staff.

All I think about is those. Yes, those lifelong like butlers. Yes. I guess that's who I think about the Secret Service method to go into Trump's car with him while he drove around around the neighborhood.

And then everybody going crazy for 15 year old Claudia Conway, like, I mean, in and of itself is so problematic. Child, she's a child and child who's screaming that she does not want to live with her parents. And people are like, yes, queen. And it's like, wait, no. Like, all you should be doing is filling out, like, foster parent.

Yeah. How to help her. I mean, I think I don't know. And people are like the Conaway's are going to get a reality TV deal and I'm just like, well that'll be the day.

That is a bad day.

But that's but that's the thing, right? You know, when you turn everything into a fucking reality show and high guilty, you're and here we are like, you're not trying to alter reality.

That's the difference. I don't know. I feel super sad for Claudia Conway. She reminds me of Bernie. I feel like Bernie would do that.

Oh, yeah, Bernie. One hundred and three years. Wow. Yeah. It's so interesting, too, because I think about, like, the fucking Hunger Games and everyone's like, we need a dystopian team to save us. And it's like, that's only fun in a movie. You know, I don't want a dystopian teen to save us. I want the representatives that are adults that my taxes pay their salary to save us. I don't want a fifteen year old who got covid from her disappointing mother to save my democracy.

Yeah, it's rough. I just feel like all of this stuff is ongoing. It will be ongoing.

You can catch up on it when you can, but it's OK to walk away if I don't think we did unbusy tonight where it was like that. We put like strips of paper in different jars and then we just like, OK, because we had to film a show that was like three weeks ahead of time, right? Yeah.

And so we didn't know what was going to have happened in the world. And we thought that that was the wildest times back then.

My gosh. And so the the joke the bit was I pulled a strip of paper from one jar and it was like Kellyanne Conway, his daughter. And then the next day I was like, takes to tick tock to bring down an administration. And it's like, oh, ha ha. So funny.

It feels like you're we're just literally reaching into jars and pulling out to.

Yeah, paper that makes no sense. I was going to say the take away is the person controlling the simulation that we're living in was obviously a huge busy tonight fan.

And that is how they're running the game, right? Well, I'm not going to lie, but in this simulation, I'm doing OK.

Well, I'm glad for you. I tell you, you are, too. Don't get so down on yourself, Autonomist.

I'm not down on myself. I'm just it's a really, really difficult time. And I just I my heart goes out to everyone who's just trying to deal with it in like a humane way and make sense of it, you know. Yeah.

Like, it's really hard to to make sense of it because I say this all the time. But it's like, you know, if you're in public and someone's doing something while you make eye contact with a stranger and you're like, hey, stranger, we're not friends, but we both agree. That's why you have that conversation with your eyes. I feel like I'm constantly alone in my house just being like I wish I was somebody here I could look at and be like, that's not right.

Right, right. I wish I was I never wanted to be on a New York subway more than the look across the aisle and be like, we just going we're going to get off the train together at the next stop, OK?

Exactly. Yeah. And then and so, like, what are we left with? You know, like I'm just like tweeting or whatever, and I'm tweeting like jokes.

They're very funny if I do say so myself, but they're not productive, you know, and like and then I'm just like, you know, how many tweets and likes do I need on something that is just like something everybody knows and I need a million.

Oh, did you guys by any chance see the rabbi, his sermon from Temple IKAR in Los Angeles? She's like very inspiring and incredible. But her sermon for Yom Kippur, Yom Kippur, Emily Bebe and I have a joke that I always call it Yom Kippur, but Yom Kippur, her sermon from Yom Kippur is on Instagram. It's about and it's just beautiful. And I the first time I watched it, like it sobbed in the bath watching it.

But it's about how what we are missing collectively is mourning and grief and and like and that is the thing that's preventing us from moving forward. And we aren't going to be able to move forward until we all stop and just acknowledge and have the thing where you look at the person and you like share the thing with your eyes because we've all been so transformed.

In the last six months, none of us are ever going to be the same, our children will never be the same and.

We have not been allowed space and no one has made room for any sort of like collective public. Morning. Yeah, and it's really powerful and I feel like that's crazy to me, some of the grief that I feel from you is that, like I feel sure.

Yeah. I mean, like this should have been like a huge year for my family.

My son missed prom and graduation and he's missing his freshman year of college like a really exciting time. And my older son's missing his senior year of college and we're apart and. Yeah, definitely.

And you and I, we're supposed to like. Yeah, we were supposed to do, you know, the whole thing. Yeah. And I was supposed to go to Paris. Yeah. You know, and so all of these things and I definitely feel like the not being able to mourn something makes you stop. You know, it does really just. Yeah. It just sticks you in amber to that place where you are. Oh my gosh.

That's such a good analogy. I just saw a thing where, like a gecko was an amber for like a thousand years and I was like it me. Yeah.

I've been having a lot of people this week about like a lot of people are like, why am I hitting a wall and melting down all of a sudden? And I said to a couple of friends, I think, like a lot of people had meltdowns earlier on.

I don't know why some people lasted this long, but I really felt like this week a lot of people just kind of like a lot of people that were tired and stoic and I've been really solid. Put this last full disclosure. Trump last video where he said that he might be immune to Colvert now I man, I literally like. I I like, screamed at a pillow throwback to busy tonight. I just like got a pillow and just straight up screamed in it because that is impossible is just like one of those things where my brain truly shut down and I like screamed in the pillow and then ate a piece of chocolate.

And then I just have to like, wait, I can't mourn because it's not over. I think that is what is we mourn like when people pass, you have a funeral and even now you can't throw a lot of people can't. But like you mourn when you're like it is finish, but it's not fucking over yet.

And that is why we're not we haven't gotten in. And I think we're all very tense, too, because like that, you know, the holidays are coming and Thanksgiving is coming and and Hanukkah, Christmas, everything, Kwanzaa. And I think people are like tents almost bracing for like a car crash and not admitting the reality of the fact that, like this time when we usually used to like, come together and celebrate is going to pass by in a way that we've never seen.

You know, we're talking about put up a Christmas tree and it'll be festive. But nobody's talking about, like, the real things that will be missing. And by the way, you know, it's also making me think of people who in the years past have been like this has always been missing for me. I've always been alone during this time. That's cheery. Yeah, well, I was on the fence about whether or not we talk about the week's events and I feel like we did, but I think we also we touched it because it happened.

Everybody in the whole fucking world saw it happen. And we don't have to go into detail about everything. But like we everybody knew we hear you. We're on the same train together and we're looking at each other. And, yes, it's fucking wild. I will say that Padilha Lipponen tweet this morning to me, I do love Patillo opponent. I'm wondering why we haven't booked her yet on the pod.

Do you know her. Well yes. No I don't. But her son. Followed me on Instagram, I had some interaction with Patti Lipan via social media a couple years ago. Listen worked out. It's up to you via via her son.

But I'm going to try I need to figure this out because talk about some Pivot's Padilha Lipan and she gives it.

She's like one of the best interviews in the biz, so I'm obsessed with her. I would definitely be down for talking to Miss P l.p.

So when are we going to get your friend back up in here? Oh my God. Yeah. You know, I hang out with all the kids. Oh, I, she knows there is a podcast, so she does. Yeah, of course. She knows everything that I do. She's like she's the nicest, she's like the next best thing to an ant to me like you got. She's like one of my group chats.

No joke. I love that.

It's very nice and it's always been a huge fan. I got to I took my mom to see one of her concerts. I mean, it must be like 15 years ago now at this point. But like through a series of, you know, universe intervening events, we ended up in the front row.

I had like purchased really terrible tickets to the stadium in Arizona or whatever, like just like what I could get on the online or I don't even remember. And then we got there, I was like, let's just go up to the box office and just see if we can upgrade our ticket from the nosebleed section or whatever. And the guy was like, yeah, actually they just released, like, all these tickets down front that somebody had been holding on to or whatever.

And we got literally four front row tickets. So I asked my mom and my life. Amazing.

May have been there too, but definitely my mom and my highlight of our lives become legends. Yes, this is a perfect Segway. Casey only knows legend. I guess the Casey is booking are like the like people like people are like, how the fuck did you get Rosie O'Donnell on your podcast?

And I'm like, these people are going to be I'm telling you right now, people are going to be like, how the fuck did Busi Phillips get Devinn?

I don't know, podcast guys look no further than his. One time assistant, many, many, many, many moons ago, when she was just a wee take, she called herself Ferrol.

I was plucked from obscurity into more obscurity, David Letterman's assistant, and she will never tell the tales that we want her to because she was a good she's a good person, not like me. So, guys, we talked to David Letterman. It was a real trip.

I hope you enjoy it during the shutdown.

Everybody stay at home orders. There is a lot of like never wearing a bra again talk. And that's cute for you if you can do that. But I can't. I need a bra. I just don't want it to be very uncomfortable. I want to be able to wear it all day and feel good. I will occasionally not wear a bra, but I just need a little bit more support and comfort and also something that like looks good under my dresses because, you know, I love to put on my fancy dresses even when we're stuck at home.

Well, I had the opportunity to work with Warners and Olga by Warners. They're always very comfortable.

But more than that, I just genuinely have bought them since I was in college because I feel like they were reasonably priced and at a store that I liked to go to a lot, which I won't mention because this is an ad, but they're available lots of different places. So my favorite bras, the no side effects, I am wearing one right now actually, and it's just super comfortable.

I like it. It's got a lot of support. And with Warners you can have it all. It's real life, it's real comfort, it's real bras. If you haven't tried Warners and Olduvai by Warners, I mean I can't imagine why not, but say this is it.

Say goodbye to your problems uh anyway and say hello to Warners and Olga by Warners and you can visit Warners dot com and find real comfort today.

You know what, it's time to do it, it's time to get busy with that.

We look forward to talking about Vizi heard Zeltzer here on Busy. Phillips is doing her best because no one Vizi rhymes with busy and No.

Two, getting busy with it just makes us all happy so far. I love it. It's time to get busy.

Listen, a lot of what we talk about when we talk about Vizi is that sometimes in life you have to make a difficult choice because all of the options that you're presented with are too similar and sometimes having something a little extra makes your choice easier. Well, guess what? Vizi stands out because it's extra something that the other hard seltzer seltzer's don't have. I was going to say the other hard zeltzer girls. And then I was like, I don't know.

Do we know that they're girls?

We don't you. I think. Did you guys gender do you guys give gender to inanimate objects like hard zeltzer?

I always say all good things are girls and then if they're good boys, they're both eyes boys.

OK, I call everything girls as well. I mean, they're so rude and I do everything.

I think everything that's nice that we want to have our girls, therefore. Ergo, this is a girl. Yeah. So if she stands out by having something all the other hard seltzer's don't antioxidant vitamin C. I mean we all need we love a vitamin C moment. I truly do. And I will take vitamin C however I'm going to get it also. I will definitely take it with some alcohol in a hurry because ionis we're having a little alcohol anyway.

Right. True.

No matter what as well. Get some vitamin C while we're at it. My favorite, I've said it before, I'll say it again is the blueberry pomegranate. I also am a fan of black cherry lime. I'm a pineapple mango.

I go to L.A. all the strawberry kiwi.

Can't get any love up in here but maybe maybe strawberry Q is your favorite.

Let us know. I feel like strawberry kiwi is what I would drop an extra shot in but pineapple mango me by itself. Wow.

I love that the Azorella cherry the super fruit with thirty times more vitamin C per cup than an orange is where they get the vitamin C from.

That is such a casserole to be like oh by the way oranges, I know you're famous for vitamin C but step back, step back. Take a step back. Oranges. I'm Azorella. Sounds like Ariela and I'm here for my girl vizi. Yeah. All right.

With Vizi you, you know, you know the deal. You enjoy refreshment and vitamin C guys. Let's do it. Upgrade your heart. Seltzer with vizi to find out where you can purchase Vizuete go to visit Zeltzer Dotcom. That's V I zwi hard seltzer dot com.

You got to be twenty one and older to drink. Get guys. Hi, Dave. I was there. Wait, wait, wait a minute, I want to be OK.

Well, there you are. Hi, Mary.

Why am I looking at. I recognize you. Do I know?

Hi, I'm a.. Nice to meet you. Yes, hello.

It right there is my name up. There it is. It says Dave. That's me.

That's you. We know who you are. And I'm busy. Philipps.

Hi. Hi. This where we're geographically. Where are all of us?

Yeah, I'm in New York.

OK, you're in New York. I'm in New York.

I'm in Los Angeles. And I'm in Los Angeles as well. What part of Los Angeles? I'm in North Hollywood, but.

Oh, you live in North Hollywood. Same world. We're in North Hollywood. You live.

Where is this? I don't have a car, so I never really know where anything is. But he knows where I live, what it's like to hang out and I live off of tohunga. And this street that is Morrisson that runs the whole length of the city. I also live in North Hollywood. All right. We'll get to you in a minute.

Shinjiro, are you or is this that you're just going to interview us? I mean, how to know where you are? Yeah, OK. If you're ok. All right.

OK, because most people know where they are. I'm in North Hollywood and that's it.

That's all I know. And don't bother getting a car either.

I'm not I don't have I haven't had one for two years.

Yeah, well, I'm sure you can. I mean, the nice thing about L.A., I find everything really pretty much within walking distance.

Yeah, pretty much. I it had. Casey, where are you.

I live off of Coldwater, so I live right behind Coldwater Elementary School, which is not a school right now.

So you have a better idea of where you are?

Yeah, I mean, I'm not going to lie. I'm still terrible with directions.

You know what I what I found when I lived in Los Angeles, it was first of all, in those days, the freeway system was delightful because there wasn't forty million cars on the road. And you always kind of knew East and West. And if you knew East and West, you knew north and south. Correct. There you go. Yeah, I know.

Yeah. You're in the New York. Manhattan.

I'm in New York. Yeah, I'm in Manhattan. I live and have lived in L.A. for over twenty years.

I moved out there for college and then started working as an actor and have a house and all that. And then I kind of just I had to get out. And so now I'm in New York.

When you said you had to get out of L.A., what does that mean? It's a long story, Dave, but a change of scenery is always good for Fergerson.

I'm sorry. You you brought it up. When did you live in North Hollywood?

About nineteen seventy five. I was my first residence in L.A. It was nineteen seventy five to right off Lankershim and Miranda Lankershim and Miranda. I lived near the duties of the country Western Store, legendary country West.

Yes, I've taken my girls there when they were horseback riding for a minute and a half. Yeah. All outfitted. And then of course they gave that up and we had all the gear. So that was fun.

Not many girls. Yeah, I have to. I have a twelve year old and a seven year old. Oh cool.

That's, that's great. Yeah. Great. Any trouble with the twelve year old.

She's no she's I mean it's only trouble but she's pretty phenomenal and, and like a very special person but she's a lot of, it's a lot of work, you know.

And how was the move to New York for her?

Well, we're and you know, they're not going to school right now in Los Angeles. So what we're doing is they're doing remote learning, which is terrible. And and so they're continuing their L.A. remote learning here.

So they actually like it better because they start at noon instead of it, you know, eight or nine. I she's forgetting about the pandemic.

I'm sorry, Casey. What about your kids? Oh, they're great. Eli is twenty one and he's Jesus Christ.

I know he's living in Connecticut.

He is a college student, also distance learning. And he go he goes to Southern Connecticut State University, but. He'll just say New Haven, if you ask him and let you make your own conclusion. We're supposed to think it's Yale.

Yeah, and then my younger son Lincoln is 18 and he's here with us in Los Angeles. And he just graduated from Eagle Rock High School. And he's going to Cal State L.A. this semester, but also from his bedroom.

Yeah, yeah. And what does he want to do when he finishes up at New Haven?

They both are really into politics. So I think they both like to be political consultants and work on policy and getting great people elected. And they're both really active in that now.

So it's a.. Oh, no, I absolutely 100 percent want zero children. I well, I want to be a fun black aunt. I want to, like, come around for Christmas and Thanksgiving, give the kids like a hundred dollars and then leave. That's my dream. That's why I got into the business just to make money to give to other people's kids.

So they could be like, oh my gosh, I like munificence of that. Good.

Yeah, just trying to be fun. Come around for the holidays with a cocktail, give you twenty dollars, tell them that they're my favorite and leave.

What is your favorite cocktail.

I'm actually I'm very into bourbon. I like a bourbon. Neat. Yeah.

There you go. You know what I dislike and I don't drink but I dislike somebody who says bourbon and then like butterscotch syrup or something, you know.

Well and I'm like, whoa.

Yeah, I like that. And I just I just got a sipping tequila that I really like neat as well.

I like the neat part here. I really like the. No, I actually met this guy. I don't know where Dave and I met this guy at a charity event and I was drinking the sipping tequila and I was like, wow, this is something the best tequila I've ever had. And he was like, You like that? I was like, yeah. And he was like, I make that tequila. And then he just like sent some to my house and I was like, OK, I'm living the dream.

Yeah. Dave, what was the last thing that got sent to your house yesterday?

I received a dozen pizzas. Oh, really? Yeah. I'm Jimmy Kimmel. Because you helped with the Emmy. Brodkey Yeah, you did. At the Emmy.

I saw you just be like a Meals on Wheels thing. He periodically sends out food to people who haven't worked.

Where were they from? Pizzeria Bianco.

Yes, they were.

Yeah, yeah, I know it well. I grew up in Arizona and Pizzeria Bianco was the place that I would go in high school. We were like seventeen and they would give us wine. It was the nineties, Dave, you remember the 90s.

Anything goes and we're loved and we're in Arizona. I grew up in Scottsdale. I was born in Chicago. I grew up in Scottsdale. My my parents are like your biggest fans. We only watched you growing up.

I would pretend that I was Terry GHA and it was my dream was to be Terry GHA in all the ways but but especially when she was on your show.

And it was was tremendous. Just a tremendous actress and a lovely person. And she she really helped us become established because she was well regarded and just by virtue of her being on our show, that that helped us greatly.

Well, you guys had such an amazing chemistry together. You were always you played off of each other so incredibly well.

Well, she she was the kind of person that made everybody look better.

Oh, that's the nicest thing that anyone could say about a person, I think in those early days, like when when you when you say, like, she really helped us out, like when you started with The Late Show, was it like touch-And-Go? Did you think, like, this isn't going to last or.

Yes, yes, I did, because I had done one other show for NBC and it didn't last. And I think everybody understands the trauma of losing one's livelihood, especially if that's all one ever wanted to do. And then starting up again takes a while to lose that trepidation.

Yeah, you're you're you're talking about the morning show. Yes. It was on for a week.

No way. Really. They gave you one week a week. And what was the what was the reason?

They're like, you'll work better. Late night people don't understand what you're talking about.

What if it just sucked? That's not true. I it was a very good show. I don't believe lying. He's lying.

If you. Sadly, you can't see any evidence of it, and that was true when it was on, and then you get this show, but they gave you so you had a lot of time, do you? Was it always pressure? I don't remember. I watched that HBO movie in like the 90s, but I don't remember at the late night wars.

And that movie is there's two reasons I don't like HBO. You want to hear them both? Of course. Yes, please.

One time I was in New York City and I had no money on me. I just had no money. I'd spend it getting drunk and I needed money to get a cab to get to the airport. And all I had was a checkbook. Shinta, you're probably not old enough to remember checkbook.

I do. I do. In the fourth grade, Brandon Whitaker's mom came to fourth grade class and taught everybody how to write a check.

Well, I never forgot that because I was one of those guys. If you if you still had checks in the checkbook, you assume you still had money.

Well, that's not the point. So anyway, I go I go to the Improv and the guy who is the bartender and I won't mention his name here, but later went on to become the head of HBO. And so it's eleven o'clock at night at the Improv. I have no money. I had been on The Tonight Show. I thought, well, the Improv might know that I'm good for a ten dollar check because I'd I'd been on Major League TV, so I walked in there.

Oh, hi. You're so-and-so. I'm so-and-so. Yeah. Nice to see you. Listen, I have no money. I got to get to the airport. Can I write a ten dollar check? And you said no. OK, reason number one.

Oh, my God. You know what? Wouldn't take a ten dollar check. The second one was one of you book that miserable movie who wasn't busy.

So they had me at my home on the weekend and they had set up a like an archery target and me standing like fifty feet from the archery target, throwing softballs at it.

That's something you'd only see in a very, very inexpensive carnival, like a church sponsored carnival might have this event in my lifetime. I've never thrown softballs at an archery target. That's reason number two. And I think you'll all back me up.

Dave, I worked for you when that movie came out OK? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I remember you being, like, coming in and being like, did you watch that? And I was like, I'm gonna watch like a couple of minutes of it. And then later in the day you called me into your office and you're like, hey, come in here. I got to ask you something. I don't walk like that, do I?

I know I've had several comedians up and coming improv women who have done me and they always fucking get it wrong. And it drives me insane because they just go straight valley girl and make me sound like a fucking idiot. And the truth is, my voice is actually very deep and my parents are from Chicago and I have like a heart a and I reached out my friend. She's my friend now and she's on Saturday Night Live. Chloe Fineman. I like tech.

I dumped her on and I said, if you're going to do it, lower my voice. I'm not a fucking idiot. And I have hard A's. I guess it's not always the most flattering portrayal. People go for what?

I don't know you. Well, just let this go.

Yeah, I got a little short, huh?

Well, thank you for joining us.

Yeah, I was going to say thank you for that. A lot of fun. I got to mow the yard before I gave. It was so nice when you made that video for me when my show was canceled. Oh, now I'm going to cry. It made me it was really it really meant a lot to me.

And and it also, I think clearly because you didn't know who the fuck I was before Casey or somebody told you, it really speaks so much to how wonderful our friend Casey St. Onge is and how much you must have enjoyed her working for you.

Well, look, I can say many things about this. One of the best things that happened to me is the show. And because I, I it transformed me back to an actual. Human being, because when I was in the in the eye of the storm and by the way, it was not calm the way the eye of a storm is, but when I was in the storm of doing a nightly show for how many years we did thirty three year changes, it change it warps one's view physically, emotionally and in every way humanly possible.

It changes a person. When I when I stopped doing the show, I began reflecting on the humanity of what that experience must have been for others. And it filled me with a lot of fun memories. And then also a lot of I began to realize that I didn't get to know some of the people the way I would like to have known them and probably would have in another walk of life. And Casey, I believe, falls into that latter category.

And and through kind of reflecting on the show, I began to know more about Casey's role at the show. And it was because of that connection that and your heart was that I was happy to help out.

I would like to say something because you and I have actually talked, you know, since since the show ended. And you're a busy guy. You know, everyone in the world, the the amount of people that I know and who have influenced my life is certainly smaller. And I appreciate you saying like it wasn't perfect because it certainly wasn't. It was a wild time. But I was also basically feral when I came to work for you.

I was you know, I was I was the only application.

If you're feral, it kind of was you know, I again, I don't know how much you remember, but I basically had been rejected for an internship. And then I suddenly got a call saying, like, oh, no, it turns out that somebody does want you to come to this show and work for them. And it was you and your office. And so I just came from this farm with shit on my shoes to New York City to work for you.

I remember interviewing with you and you said, the only thing I really care about is can you drive a stick shift? And I was like, no, sir, I cannot drive. And so I was like, well, that's it. My ship is sailing by. But so then you you picked me and I came. And when I got up the courage to say, like, hey, by the way, why did you pick me when I couldn't do the one thing that you wanted your intern to do, you were like, oh, this girl has a weird name.

She went to terrible school.

I had met you. And I thought, like, OK, so she can't drive my car to put gas in my car, but she seems smart and she'll figure it out. And so, like, you having that faith in me that I would figure it out was a really big deal. And so, yes, it was a storm. It was a crazy time. And there's a lot of things that I would change about the way things were done in that time, not just with our show, but every show.

But also you did give me a shot.

Well, you're being very generous. And what I would like to underline is I wish I had stronger, better and different relationships with the people who were nice enough to put up with me. So thank you. Well, yeah, I don't know what to say. We you know, it was it I learned I learned so, so much there. That's I now I'm going to cry. I learned a lot there. And so I think that I think it's right for all of us to sort of acknowledge and answer for the way we could have done things better.

But truly, I did learn a lot there.

You know, I mean, it's it's amazing to me how much of life was ignored because of my ridiculous, selfish commitment to doing a Daily Show.

What was that, though? Is that your is that just in you? Is that you're the way that you thought it? It could only be that way. Yeah.

I didn't even think about I mean, you must have had once you're given a show. Yeah. Especially if you've had one. Take it away from you.

Yeah. You want to make damn sure that you're concentrating on the project at hand. For sure. When I get it to a fault where everything else was excluded and I have no regrets about that. Do you have a top 10 list of regrets about it? I got to go. Thanks. I mean, Dave, like I didn't have as much of a choice. I don't think Jimmy or Jimmy or just the other guys named Jimmy to the James, but our Seth my friend Seth.

It does feel all encompassing, though, at that network level. But I feel like maybe that's coming from another place and put on you the.

Well, I felt and I'll just say this and then we'll go on to something far more interesting. I felt a lot of pressure. A, because of Carson was the the role model. Carson was the standard. And I felt like I never quite lived up to that. So I felt pressure there. I was on opposite Jay Leno, who was doing better ratings wise than was I felt pressure there and I'd had one show canceled out from under me.

So I felt pressure there as well. And then we had gone from NBC where they were used to this day, part succeeding to CBS, which had not had much luck recently in this day part and knew nothing about CBS. So I felt pressure there. But these are all just excuses. I'm telling you, if I had met either of the three of you and I was working at the Footlocker, you would have found me to be a different person, perhaps the the actual person I am.

God, if I could get that gig at o'clock, I might know someone.

I don't I don't think anyone is hiring right now. They'll come back.

I have a question because you're comedians in Cars getting coffee was the year before you announced your retirement from your show.

And I wondered if that was like the first time where you had an experience where you're like, well, there's a world where I'm not killing myself and at the, you know, price of all other. But I could still talk to interesting people and do a different kind of thing.

No, I was not aware of it prior. It took me six months into the retirement to figure that out. Oh, really? Yeah. I just assumed that the person I was every day for thirty three years was the person I was. Right. And and I think now back on things that happened and some of the experiences are just. I don't know. Remarkable and, you know, I wish they hadn't happened that because they happened because of things I did.

I'm sorry about that. But once everything settles down and you see the world and you see your family and you see what's going on, I was still armored, you know, and then the armor falls away and you begin to understand yourself, others or what you should do, what you shouldn't do, what you would rather be, mistakes you made and on and on. It's a lot of introspection and with most introspection, it's only interesting to the person who's introspective.

Well, I think that it's it's very interesting because we're interested in your introspection, because obviously you are a huge part of American culture, world culture, like I'm a writer and a comedian. So obviously you are influential into I write for a late night show right now. So there is really right I write for the American show. But I think that we've talked to Rosie O'Donnell, too, and like both of you are very important in this culture. And I think it's really important and very fascinating to me to hear you, because you don't have to be introspective.

You don't have to be better. Like, it's great that you're doing it. But the way that this world is set up, like if you decided just to be a piece of shit, people would be like, OK. And I think that it's really important and cool for you to be like, you know what? I did it like that about myself. I thought about it. And I am going to spend the rest of my time really being better.

And also that you're the second person who said that once my show was over, I really enjoyed coming back to Earth and meeting myself. And I don't think even if you're not working in television, I think meeting yourself for the first time is very important and people don't talk about doing it. So I think it's really cool that you are willing to say that because obviously people will listen to you about how important it is. But also, I think people ignore the fact that, like, you can be a new person, a better person that you like, that you would like to spend time with after you've done 30 years of something else.

And I think that that's really cool.

That's very kind of you. And you. What's inconsistent about this whole thing is at a certain point in your life, this is all you want to do, right?

You can't afford glassware, honest to God, for everybody drinks out of mason jars. Now, Dave, that's it's hipster.

It's cool what's in their water. Oh, OK. Well, Dave, you're such a good storyteller. Yeah. You're the best storyteller. So we wanted I know that you've talked about like this really big, pivotal moment of retiring and regrets that you have. And you've given me an opportunity to say, you know, that I learned a lot and I admire you. And I also got in trouble when that biography was written about you. But kind of like, yeah, because I wouldn't say the author took me out to lunch and I wouldn't say anything bad about you.

And then he was like, Dave actually told me worse things about himself than you're saying here. And I was like, got my free turkey burger, got a lecture by the book. I felt like that's how I knew I could really trust is like she would not she didn't talk shit about you or Rosie or.

Oh, my God. What's his name? Andy Cohen. Yes.

She talks a little about Andy. You forgot his name. I didn't remember it, but it's it's remarkable.

It's an unusual trait in this day and age and I think unusual to humanity generally. So thank you.

I just I listen, I just feel like if there's something that I want to say to you, maybe I'll say it to you. But there's no need for me to say it in a book, not just about you, anybody, but you're you're a great storyteller. So why don't you tell us a story about a pivot in your life that we might not be familiar with?

Well, you know, I was in prison.

You are not now six years. That's my trial. If it is.

I know when a federal penitentiary in Kansas, David Letterman, prison guard.

Well, I'm too it wasn't one of those country club prisons that everybody goes to these days. You know, a lot of things a man doesn't like to talk about.

That's where I bet just the driest, I bet. But for real, I know I feel like I know pivot stories about you.

Do you have do you have, like, a fun one? Like, I love this story about when you were tapped to, like, guest host a game show. Do you remember this one? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, this is this was a great story right up until the end of the story, but in those days everything's different. But I'm a product of the Comedy Store, which now is a completely different place, a completely different enterprise and is tremendous plays a tremendous part in the success of big, big comedy stars.

But when I was there, it was just me and a bunch of dopes telling jokes and so to. AUGMENT, we've got the money in those days. A guy named Tom Dreesen, a very good friend of mine, had all connections where he knew of production companies that needed standards, villains, the dummies, extras. And so, one, when we would go out and we would be in a commercial for Dodge and we the next week we'd be at a game show run through.

So that's how the game show stuff began. There was a guy named Ron Green, I believe, who is a game show producer, and we would come and try out his game show. He said, here's my idea and here's what we're going to do, and you'll be the celebrities and you'll be the contestant. And we got paid seven bucks a day for this. And that was great because that was that was gas and anything else. You do it for a couple of weeks and it's extra money.

And it was all that I did it.

And Jay Leno did it in the late Boosler did it and Tom Dreesen did it and Johnny Dark did it. And I think Jeff Altman did it. And many other people that I knew were Shirley Hemphill was part of this anyway. So you work your way up. They think, oh, jeez, that went pretty well. And if the show gets produced, you get maybe get to be a part of it. So a couple of years after doing these game show run throws, they had a pilot they were going to do and they said, me, I daybed.

You get to be the host of this pilot. Now, we're not saying you'll be if the show gets picked up, we're not saying you'll be the guy. We want you to do the pilot.

I said, you know, in the nascent part of your career, you're agreeable to stuff because you don't know. And so we're standing backstage and I'm kind of excited. And the I'm standing next to Joanne Worley, who was the celebrity guest on that show, and they're getting ready to to introduce me. And she says, wow, she said, you're hosting a game show. And I said, Yeah, yeah. And she says, well, good luck.

That's the only thing you'll ever do the rest of your life. And all of this excitement. Yeah, paralyzing dread because I thought, oh, my God, she's right. I'll never I'll just all I will do is be a game show host now.

So really, I was going to say also, I don't know Joanne Worley, but Red Flag, read the room. You're trying to have a nice time being. Well, maybe it was rude.

I like like a bitchy actress thing to do. Well, anyway, they didn't pick it up and I went on to other things. But if you look at that, Pat Sajak, I mean, this guy was used to be the weatherman at can be sweet and very funny.

Very, very funny. And I think he had a late night show at CBS as well.

He did for a very short time. I remember spending on that on that wheel of Fortune. Yeah. Or for like forty years. Yes. And it just shows with barely a personality what you can do.

Yeah. It makes it, you know, maybe it turns you into a Republican.

Those was I was kind of surprised to hear that, that, that is his political party really.

It's like you can look at that guy and tell. It's interesting.

He and Larry. Chuck Woolery tale, yeah, that's I don't know that that story, but I don't know if it was pivotal, it was only frightening. I was scared silly that oh gosh, again, in pursuing something that I thought was fun and beneficial may have just collapsed around me like a burning building.

But you were doing so you were doing standup and stuff. Was a late night show always what you wanted to do. I mean, I know you were a weather man and you had like, you know that. So a late night show was always the goal.

You were like Merv Griffin and or talk show because I can't I can't do anything else. Right. I can't act.

Sure, you were great in Mork and Mindy, but one of the worst experiences of my life, I remember the final you know, when they do a they do a dress rehearsal show and then they do the real show. And in between Howard.

Sure. Howard Storm, somebody like that was the director, very well known director in the world of situation comedies. And I'm in the makeup chair for the real real show. And he says, you know, we've been doing this all week. You have one last chance to get it right now that I think it's there's two things that you've brought up that have been very wild to me is the cost of things like seven dollars a day is like what minimum wage is now.

So people are still probably making seven dollars a day in Georgia. But when you wrote the check for ten dollars to go to the airport, if you're in the airport in New York, it costs five dollars to get to your plane. So, Dave, here, I'll say I'll say something about you when I worked for you. God bless you. You were so out of touch with how things how much things cost because you would be like, can you go get me a pair of jeans?

Like I ripped my jeans, can you go buy me a pair of jeans?

And you'd give me like eleven dollars cash and I'd be like, well, by the way, so that might be the truth of the Comedy Store guy who ended up being the head of HBO. He was like fucking ten dollars to JFK. No, dude, buy the same drug addict. Yeah. Sometimes you'd be like, I'm craving some soup. Will you go get me soup and then give me like two hundred dollars and I'd be like, all right.

I hope you says keep the change at some point. I had recently changed residences in Manhattan and had no bedding. And there was a young woman who was, I think, an intern, very nice kid. And her goal of the day was to go buy sheets. And she went and came back and said, here's your here's your sheets. And I said, oh, jeez, that's great. Thank you. How much were they interested? Three thousand dollars.

Oh, and I had the same reaction. I didn't know she'd cost three thousand dollars.

I mean, they can get thirty dollars. Yeah.

Guys, what were they. Why. Three thousand thread count. Thread count. Right now Labrang in the thread count. It could just be all about thread count.

Yeah. I was shocked when I found out that there was like a twenty thousand dollar mattress.

Yeah. Oh OK.

I went to a mattress store in the before times with my friend and there was a mattress that was like seven thousand dollars and I was like, that's crazy. So then I laid on it and I understood it. I laid on it and I was like, this is foolish, do it. Oh OK. If I get an extra seven thousand dollars, I might have to come back the mattress town. Oh, mattress down there. The best.

All right, guys, 20, 20 is already reshaped. A lot of things, but very much how we work. It's not only halfway over. Guys, come on. It's got to be we're almost done with 20, 20. Right. So clumsy or something.

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So, Dave, it's 20, 20, if there's a pandemic, you retired Hower, but now you have this Netflix show. What like what's your life like, what's happening, what's happening with your son, how's he doing? What's next for you? Well, I'm not sure any of us know what's next for us. My son is a junior in high school or he would have been he quit and got a job at Subway. So that's what he and the Netflix show has been great.

A wonderful experience for me and for I hope for the people that we worked with. I hope it was an altogether different experience than my previous show. But it's been a lot of fun. And I would I would like to continue doing something like that. I got to meet people that just really, really impressive people that I knew of but didn't know. And that experience for me has been has been great because we can I like talking to them about things that we have in common and things we don't have in common.

And it's been greatly beneficial for me therapeutically, emotionally to talk to these other people that are wildly successful and find out. Find out. What they are as actual human beings, not just show business figures, so that's been great. It's part of the like introspection of the time after this show where you're like, I think you're your own self in a way.

I think so. But but also it's the the old show, as you would know, you got six, eight, 10 minutes maybe. And good night here. I think we talked to Elizabeth, I think it was close to two hours, she's the best, which was she's the bad. Oh, my God. And and I know I look like the kind of guy that would be a big Lizzo fan, but I just didn't know that much about her and what I found out about her.

I just fell in love with her.

Yeah, we had her on our show. I mean, tremendous.

And it's just amazing where you sort of a maternal instinct about or you kind of want to. She's so good. You just want to protect her. You know, you want to help or you want to make sure that people aren't nasty to her.

Yeah, I think that's one thing interesting about you. And I've said that people ask about you all the time. What's he really like and what was that experience really like? And I always do say that you were very paternal figure. So I hope you give yourself at least a little bit of credit for that, you know, in between being introspective. But you were I feel like you were very protective of me, sometimes in a hilarious way. Yeah.

You hated you hated my boyfriend. I don't know if you remember that he worked at VH one and you'd always be like, what is he of his? He was insane. I do not like the side of him, but we're married. He's the father of my children.

Oh, my God. And then also, I don't know if you remember this, but we were here in Los Angeles doing The Late Show out of CBS Television City. And you had gone to rehearsal and you came back from rehearsal and you were like, Casey, get in here. I want to talk to you about something. And I was like, oh, God. Like, what did I do? Am I in trouble? So I went into your office and you were like, sit down.

You know how guys are. There's a lot of young guys that work on this show and they like to gossip and talk just as much as anyone. And I heard a lot of the guys talking about how they were going to go to a tattoo parlor tonight and get tattoos. And, you know, because they're legal here and they're not legal in New York City. And then they got around to saying, like, hey, should we invite Casey?

And one of the guys said, we can invite her. She'll probably go. She already has a tattoo.

And you were like, so I just want you to know that some guys that work here are spreading a rumor that and then I was like, I do, what do you want to see?

And you were like, no, no, no. Do your parents know? Oh, my God, did you get this on my watch? Oh, my God, that's so cute.

It's it's like I'm the youth minister. The kids weren't all how nice.

It made me laugh so hard. And you were just I remember you saying, like, your parents and, you know, let you come to New York and entrusted me to, like, make sure that you're OK here in the big city. And then you're like, I find out that you get a tattoo. And I was like, I got this tattoo when I was 18 years old. My mom also has a tattoo.

So, yeah, OK. And like, I had to have you come in and sit down and talk it over. Thank you.

Father gave it was very funny to me and and endearing. I liked that you cared that the boys say this because I was, I started in entertainment when I was 19 years old. I got Freaks and Geeks, my first TV show. You know, when you're a young woman in this industry, a lot can fuckin happen, as we know. And I do think that if you're lucky enough in your first job to work for somebody in a position of power, a man who.

Seems like what can happen and has seen Paul Feig and Judd Apatow took Linda Cardellini and I aside to tell us I don't want you guys to go on any diets. I know what's happening.

Like, you know, I think that there was a thing in in that time because it was all so unspoken. No one fucking talked about Harvey Weinstein. If he invites you to your to have a meeting in his hotel room, don't go. So I do think that even though it's like this is part of the patriarchal system that obviously we're trying to dismantle. But at the same time, Dave, what he saw in you and what he was trying to do is the same thing Paul and Judd were doing for me and Linda, which is like there was going to be a lot of bullshit.

We don't want you. You girls are talented and smart. It's just that was the that was the thing that had to happen, because if it wasn't the white guy in charge saying it to you, someone else is going to tell you something very different. So I appreciate it.

Well, that's that's good. It's glad that that has filtered into the system even and this is a few years ago. But that's great.

Well, that was so long ago. But we do you did you ever feel like that kind of responsibility, like for Casey, thank you. That you were paying attention. That was just something that happened.

No, I honestly, I was just like I said earlier, I was so focused on is this show going to be OK? What did I screw up tonight? What did I screw up last night? And that that just fed on itself. And I just was, what, day to day, oblivious to most things except the show and the source of what I know, I shouldn't have behaved that way. And and I don't know if I think if you have the kind of ego that needs to go into show business, that's the way you're going to behave.

Well, interest or, you know, you just needed more love from your parents. Hi, how are you? My name is Dave. When you were leaving your show, did they ask you who you thought? Should get it, did it did any women occur to you know, I mean, I announced that I was leaving Monday. They hired Stephen Colbert. I was in Dubai on a Friday. Monday, Stephen had the job. So that's not a great deal of well, let's get Dave up here and see what he think.

So that didn't happen. I was out the door. It's weird to me. Yeah, me too, I thought. And then then people started telling me I remember being at the Kennedy Airport with my family and some guys how much it cost me to get to that airport, about ten bucks, really.

So they come up to me in their holding seats, theater seats like four or five of them. They each have two or three and they want me to sign the theater seats. And I said, I don't. I don't. So. Well, these we took these out of your theater because they had been tossed into a dumpster on what street was a thirty four. Fifty Fourth Street was a third street. So the next day they started demolishing the set and throwing the stuff out on the sidewalk.

That broke my heart because that set was so beautiful. Kathleen Anker's had built acres. God bless her. Yeah, but I understand that the the facility that is, they found things that had been covered up in the remodeling that we did, that it's just even lovelier now. But yeah, I felt like anyway, no, they didn't ask me about other people, but I'm now looking at it. We have all of the people that you named and I know and like all of them.

But it's been cool if we get a woman in one of those seats and, you know, it's it's I remember the first time being on an airplane and the captain was a female and you thought, oh, Jesus, a woman, are we going to be all right?

What's going to happen now? And of course, yeah, everything's fine. And there's no reason.

Well, I would I would have been in the same way with an eleven thirty talk show. What's the problem?

Well, yeah, I guess part of it is hiring. Right. Like did it ever did it ever occur to hire more women or. You know what I mean. I just feel like the, the, the culture obviously seems like it skews so male.

And I, I think, I mean I think it has to do with, you know, who runs the. Networks and the studios and shit, but I just wondered, did you have, like a woman that you could point to and be like, what do you think about that?

Yeah, we had quite a few women on the staff in positions of power, creative power and administrative power. And we talked about this all the time. I don't know how many executive producers we had that were women. And it just I relied on them heavily because they they seem to have a better sense of what was going on then, certainly, than I did. So I don't know why.

Others worked, and it came to me later than it should have, but I don't know why others weren't more aware of that at the time, but it worked out OK, except if you're a woman, that is that's one thing I want to say, because I think that all late night shows, that's always a conversation about, you know, there's not enough women, particularly writing the comedy and hosting the comedy, but at least show Jude Brennan, Barbara Gaines, Maria Pope.

Kathy Mavor caucus.

Yes. Yes, that's just it. Nell Scovell right now, Scovel was a writer early at late night, but for a very short time. Right. But you guys still talk to each other, Dave, right?

You know, yes. We exchanged emails about a year ago. So we're we're pretty close.

And, of course, you know, I don't know if you feel comfortable talking about Merrill Markoe, but she was instrumental in sort of shaping the original show, correct?

Yes. Yes, absolutely. She and I were, as the kids say, romantically involved. We hooked up.

Oh, OK. Now I understand now now I get it. Very, very funny, very smart. And we we're kind of doing her show. And all I kind of worried about was if I had an idea, I would take it to Merrill. And then but she she came up with stupid human tricks to Patrick. And a lot of the video pieces we did in those days, she was responsible for. She was fantastically creative and prolific and she was in charge of the writers.

So I never really had to worry about it. And her I thought her coda on that was we would get submissions. And she always said to me, if it makes you laugh, they're funny. Well, yeah, I mean, that's pretty simple, but that's also a pretty big order that somebody comes in a three or four page submission and you're supposed to laugh and if you don't laugh, you're not getting through the door. So that's that's how she staffed our writers room.

And that's the way it stayed for quite a long time.

I have a question about that. Did you guys hire solely off of those writing submissions? Because now you have to have a meeting. I had a meeting with Daily Show years ago, and Trevor Noah truly was just like, we have to meet people because you want to make sure you want to be in a room with a person for four hours because people have been duped before. Yeah. So did you guys solely at the beginning go off of pure writing or did you meet people because you might have a great writer and meet someone and be like that?

Do the super weird. I don't want to hang out with him.

Well, the only person that I met was Paul Shaffer. And really all the writers know they were all off the submission and their experience. We were lucky for a period to have a bunch of guys, guys again who had come from Saturday Night Live and we knew them by reputation. Yeah. But typically there were no no meetings.

Did you ever get duped? Well, the network got duped with me.

You know, it comes and goes. Yeah, I it's a tricky thing when you're hiring somebody in a creative position. Yeah. Do you ever get duped. Well. Perhaps you do, but whose fault is it? Is it my fault? Is it their fault? I don't know. You could only and I think that's the I don't know if they still do it this way, but it used to be 13 week cycles for a writer. I think therein lies the period of did we get duped?

Yeah, we get great writers that pass through those doors and. Yeah, and a lot of them that left and proved to be much, much better than I knew at the time. I never held a job longer than 13 weeks before I go. And I was I was happy because I thought, great, now I can go on to something else. That was the nice thing about being in Los Angeles when I was you would just go from production to production to production and you'd work there six weeks or whatever the time period was, and then that would fold up.

And then you go on to something else and it kept things interesting and you would make a little money here and there.

Do you ever feel like you work best under pressure? Is that who you are?

Like, do I like I like to think I work best under pressure. And then I remember they asked me to host the Academy Awards and that was my impression of how I am under pressure.

I remember that, to be fair, it still will not go down in history as being the worst. So they say, thanks for you. Come back, I'll go.

Oh my gosh. I remember you flew right to London. I watched it in London because we were doing the show from Thames Studios in London. And so I'd been there for a couple of weeks. And I remember getting up at whatever ridiculous time to watch the Oscars and then just being like, it doesn't seem like he's enjoying this.

And then I went out first thing in the morning and bought a rugby ball because I was like, this'll cheer him up when he lands. I'm going to ask him if he wants to have a catch with this rugby ball.

Did you did did Rosie ever take you to London? Not not to London and busy. Did you ever take KC to London?

I took her to I took her to a fancy resort in Mexico, not for the show, just for fun, because we're friends. Just just just for fun. Dave, I have a very I have a very sweet photo of you and I chatting on the on the Thames. We were standing on the bridge chatting in London. And I love it. It's one of my favorite photos and I love it because I remember that it looks like we're having the deepest conversation in the world and we're talking about baloney sandwiches right there.

That's the story of me a little bit. Yeah. What is it? They ever had a baloney sandwich?

And listen to what you have in both London. And I don't often do this, but I just finished a book that reminded me so much of my limited experience in London. But certain certain aspects of it still exist today. And it's called The Splendid and the Vile. And it's about World War Two and Churchill during the Blitz of London. And it's written by Eric Larson. And it's a wonderful account of heroism in the face of imminent destruction. And they mentioned many of the places we visited and saw and stated when we've been in London.

But the courage of the people and the people leading them is is hard to believe compared to what we're going through now. That's splendid in the Bible. It's great.

I know what I'm getting for Christmas recipes for baloney sandwiches.

Yeah, you always give great book recommendations.

So you use my ass is going to sleep.

How much longer we can do this? We don't have to go much longer. We don't. You need to go. You can go. We adore you. Are you are you looking forward to the election day of what do you think what do you think's going to happen?

Well, I am reassured by this one notion. Donald Trump will not be re-elected. I believe that he will be taken out of the White House by the Secret Service, and he will he will get treatment. I believe he's mentally ill. And he will once he's stable, he will go to prison. So I'm reassured by this. I believe that's what will happen. I hope so, from your lips to God's ears. Dave, thank you so much for doing this podcast, but also thank you so much for, you know, giving me a shot when I was Farel.

Well, Casey, you're so kind. And and it's just exactly what I talked about earlier. Your impression of your time there is is mostly new to me and surprisingly positive. So I can't thank you enough for that. And busy. What can I say about you?

I don't know and shouldn't.

God bless you.

Get a car. I mean, if you buy me what I get for your day.

Anybody a car. Unplug this thing.

Dave David Letterman. Thank you.

Thank you very much.

Bye bye. Bye.

All right.

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Oh, my God, let's just keep talking for one second. Holy shit. God, we you know, we did it. No, I'm not kidding, though. He is my dad. This is my dad's Christmas present.

I knew your dad, Dave recommended this book.

It will be like dad's favorite that. Well, for sure.

No, wait, let's keep talking because we can just end the show like this, too, because I do feel like I do feel like this. The third act post, David Letterman, it's going to feel I mean, we can have some reflection, too. Yeah, like what?

Listen, Shinjiro, let me tell you something. I didn't bring this up to Dave because I don't want to raise a red flag. Yeah. He's talking about, like, how cranky he was, whatever. When this is all true, he's being honest. I feel like if he wants to say that about himself, let him say that about himself. But here's what I will tell you. One time I asked him to pick a beneficiary for a life insurance policy, and I guess he was like busy and overwhelmed.

And he just was like, I don't I don't have time to do this right now. And I was like, but you need to it's important. Your business manager. And he was like, I don't I do not care.

I do not care who is the beneficiary of this life insurance policy. This is before he was married or had a child. And I was like, OK, great, I'll make myself the beneficiary of this life insurance policy. So if nobody has ever caught that and it still stands to this day. I have a small amount of money from a small insurance policy coming to me, and if I ever get it, I'll buy you a car with it.

Yeah, I love I just like love when people just be like, get something. I was like, are you kidding? I don't need a car. I'm a girl bitch. Not to know that to that guy.

Cars are very important. I know. That's why you should give me one two years. If David Letterman want to give me a fish, I'll find somewhere to park. Listen, I like Pymble with all these cars that people have given her that, you know, I drive. I feel like he is going to buy you a car. Yeah, I really do. I really fucking do. I think I think a car is going to fucking show up for you.

I close my eyes. I get there when I worked for him one time. I think like I can't remember if it was that he placed a bet on a horse or like bought a stock. But anyway so the fun game was to go around to everyone and say he was like, I invested in this stock. If I like it, if it goes through the roof, if we make a ton of money on this, what kind of car do you want?

And he asked every single person and everybody was like, I want to you know, I want a Mercedes, I want a BMW, a fancy car and fancy cars. And then he was like, what kind of car do you want? And I was like, I don't know, like a Dodge Neon.

And then after he was like, if this stock makes any money because you weren't greedy, you're the only person I'm going to buy that car for.

But then it didn't make any money. Well, like, he also is truly like a dad, because my dad always told me he was like, it's not the buying of the Ferrari, it's not the buying of the house. It's the maintaining the Ferrari and the taxes and the filling of the house, filling up the house.

I, I had I went and looked at the price of rugs and I was like, couldn't be me. I know. By the way, rugs are the secret expense of the universe. It's oh my God, I've seen how expensive fucking rugs are like rugs. People get the other you go to your grandma's house and she got like three and it's like, oh, it's insane for need to hold together a whole other job just to buy rugs.

Yeah.

I literally was like, I'm leaving my children borrow money, I'm only leaving them the fucking rugs. I'm not kidding.

They're so expensive. And then also, like, I don't know, I feel like this is also the crowd for this. Like, I'm like accidentally Buji. So like if I'm in a store and I see a sale rack, I'll be like, I like this shoe. It'll be like a four dollar Koha. And I'll be like, absolutely not. So I've been like looking at rugs. And I was like, oh, this rug is cute.

Twelve thousand dollars. I was like, my taste. Oh my God. You know what happens to me all the time? Centera I will like get advertised like a little ring or something on Instagram and then I click on it and it's like thirty thousand dollars and Instagram is like oh she's rich. And then they just start showing me like the craziest Buji shit. And I'm like I need to send an email to Mr. Instagram and tell him that I'm unemployed and I have zero dollars.

Yeah, I, my taste is I know it. I'm actually proud of my taste because I'm like, oh wow. I do gravitate to the Bujji the finer things. I mean, like every time it was like a list of rugs and I was scrolling and it was like, oh this rug's one seventy five. OK, this is the web page for me. And I kept scrolling the what I love twelve thousand dollars. And I was like, first of all this is the wrong scroll to include this rugged.

Yeah. Shouldn't even be on the same page you know. So yeah. Rugs are a scam. A scam. Rugs are a secret thing. Yeah. Why don't you get a rug line. Oh it be that.

What we're doing is that I can do an affordable she affordable Roanne.

Yeah well that's the problem. I think that the problem is that then you're dealing with like where is it made and who's making it. And you don't feel good if they're and they don't. But you also know me.

I'm not about that. Like we're not making products. I'm the labor of other women and children in other countries. Just because I can't see them personally doesn't mean that maybe maybe there's like people need jobs now.

Maybe there's like an at home rug manufacturing guys.

Latch Hook was always my favorite when I was a kid. Oh, yeah. Do you ever do that, Chuck?

Have Latch Hook just came with a nice yarn because it's always like this yarn that's made of like bad janak. It's bad yarn. But I feel like if they came up with like a higher, you know, like a higher level latch hook we could be them. I do love logic, but I have invested in a Roomba and I have to make sure I get a rug that the Roomba won't destroy me.

I have a robot vacuum too and I have to like every time I use it, you have to set up all these fucking barriers that don't wander around the house every time I use it.

I like I. You do so much cleaning presetting off your robot vacuum and then like even though the room is totally bare and totally like, just cleared of everything. You set off the robot vacuum and then you have to, like, take a fork and a dog and hear what's out of it. It's I mean, just vacuum.

I don't have a I don't have a Roomba or a robotic vacuum because upstairs.

Right.

I do have stairs, but also, like, I truly I got one because I thought, well, maybe I'm having a lot of allergies, like because there's dust under my bed or something. And I thought the Roomba, that's the perfect application for it. I could not fucking figure out for the life of me how to program it for the it's really hard. And I was like, this is I'm not I'm not a dumb person. I know I don't excel sometimes at, you know, electronics, but this is way too difficult.

And I was like, I quit. I'm not programmed mine. And then something happened and it got unprogrammed. So now I just I just pressed the button. I pressed the button, too, because mine kept coming to life at an opportune moment because clearly I had mis programmed it.

And you can't have that because like now if it like sucks up your dog because you didn't put your dog away, then, you know, I've had disasters happen because of my possessed robot vacuum.

Well, guys, this was real fucking wild. It was fun. Letterman is an icon.

And by the way, should we tell everyone that there was like a time mix up and we all had to, like, get out of bed and we were like brushing our teeth and putting our while I was on the East Coast.

So it wasn't for me. I was just like I had therapy scheduled.

But Lita, thankfully, was very understanding about David Letterman.

It was very therapeutic. I feel like I feel like, you know, it was for you, I'm sure for him.

Oh, yeah, that's interesting. But it's also interesting I don't know if you noticed this. Like, to me at least, it was interesting that, like he is saying that like he's having this introspection, but he does not want to hear the stories.

Yeah. From you or, you know, like he doesn't want to hear about it.

Like what actually happened. It didn't seem like to me. It's like every time you would tell a story, he was like, oh, no, no, what an asshole. Oh, God, no. OK, we can change the subject now. Thank you.

You know, and it's like, well, it must be very weird to have to have made such a big impression on so many people and then have them telling back to you like, you know, like those are very those aren't very important stories and Dave Letterman's life. But there are stories that I'll remember for the rest of my life. So be so weird to have somebody telling you back these things that are like burned into their memories because you were such an influential figure when you know, you've done that for like millions of people, you know, it's very weird.

Oh, so crazy. Well. Thanks to settlement. Buy me a call. Thanks. Thanks, David Letterman. I'm excited for you to get that car. I'm excited. I'll take a dozen.

The center. I love how much you made him laugh. That was really great. Yeah, he clearly loved you. OK, guys, I have to run because I have to pee. But I love you guys. This was so wild. That was so fun.

David Letterman. It's our first time we had to decompress, post an interview. I know there's a lot I wanted to ask about morale, but I didn't know how.

So I, I just like, was trying to get there. So I just was like women with the river, like, I think well it's a hard question to ask.

And the other thing is that is just I really do have to go. But the other thing is too, it's like a tale as old as time man. Like, yeah. She. You guys were together, you were in a couple, she had all the fuckin ideas and made you the star like welcome to the world of being a fuckin woman.

Like, yeah, that is what we historically have done for people. Yeah, men and women. Like, she's truly all the credit. She's I mean, she gets a lot of credit. Yeah, she does.

She's truly the mother of modern late night television. If you've ever been a fan of any late night show, it owes at least some debt to Merill Markoe, who is also a mad genius.

But did she get the money? Do you know what I mean? Does she own a piece of it?

I think her career posts posts breaking up with Dave and and dissolving the creative partnership.

I don't think it was what you would hope. Yeah, that's I'm going to I'm going to just assume that I don't think it was what you would hope, but I don't know if you want to be a performer. She's hilarious. Yeah. She's a hilarious on camera talent and have an amazing an amazing voice and an amazing presence.

So you have that he spoke about her. You know, she has a book coming out. She does. I know. Maybe we should get her on the pod. She's so great.

I am into it. Let's get her married. I love it. OK, we're coming for you. Bye, guys. Love you. I love you. Bye bye.