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Dear diary, I've been going out with boys since midday yesterday. My mom is such a bitch. I'm not dumping either of them. I'm going to keep them both hanging on. Kelsey Smith is the most unpopular girl in school. Such shit, bitch.

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God, why am I such a bitch? Hi, guys.

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Welcome to another episode of Dear Diary, your effort with myself, Hannah Ferrier, and my lovely host Justin.

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Oh, I'm so glad it's not piping hot today. I know.

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Please, please excuse the manic in my voice today. It's it's a lot. I have just had my nanny start today and I went back to my super crazy hectic mithai.

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When you were going to work out, I thought you were like, in my mind, I was like, oh, she's either doing a workout or she's doing reform of Pilates.

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I did not realize that you were going to do fighting like that's that's is.

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Yes, it's like do you do like cartwheels and stuff around you?

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It's like legitimately the most hard core workout you can do because you do forty five minutes, but you have five or ten second breaks.

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So you have about like three, five second breaks and maybe two, ten second breaks throughout the whole forty five minutes.

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And you literally got left hook left hook left elbow three oh twenty seconds of hucko kicks from your left and you're right. Go to this upper body. Do this. Okay. Twenty per piece while you're punching and it's just the xrayed like you leave there dripping in sweat but it's so satisfying.

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I stand at Hanoverian throws itself literally not even in the deep end. She throws herself into the beat of the pool where it's dark and you can't see the bottom.

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And I literally left and I was like I went down the step as I was leaving and my body, like my lower body kind of crumbled and I had to grip. And this was behind me. I'm like, maybe I should have started with a yoga class. She was like, Yeah, your legs were like, I don't think so. Yeah, exactly. It was like, did you not just have a baby three months ago? Like, I think you're supposed to, like, slowly work up to it.

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And how many times a week are you going to do this? Three, three times a week. Oh good lord, I legitimately can't walk.

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And then of course we had this wonderful nanny start today. So she's basically like the Mary Poppins of nannies in Sydney, apparently. Wow.

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So she's super sweet, but at the same time, it's still so hard leaving your baby with someone, even if you've done like police checks, background checks, five different reference checks called their uncle in Switzerland, slightly different to like, you know, Josh having a or your mom because you're just like this.

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None of that kind of like who is this person?

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And yeah.

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And she's like she's come over for like a few hours and gotten to know her. And so I didn't just like, leave her with someone, but it was like also like, OK, well, she was kind of like I said, oh, maybe I should just cancel my class and hang out with you guys. She's like, I think this is maybe why you hired me.

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You hung around last time to leave. Yeah, I no, but why can't we do it all together? And she's like, no, I'm I can't just all three of us hang out, come on. Because, like, you know, have a cup of tea and talk about stuff.

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Yeah, exactly. And she's like, no, we've literally done that three times already. This is it.

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Hannah, you have to leave. Yeah. And you're like, so I ran upstairs to like have a shower and like Ava is definitely in that in the stage now. Yeah. Like when they like baby babies, they don't even know what's going on, whereas she like it, she yeah.

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She looks at her face and she knows it's not my face and she just like her little bottom lip sticks and it starts trembling and then which is slightly different to her resting bitch face that she's.

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Yes exactly. And then she just kind of looks up and just starts wailing.

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Oh, so but you like Mommy's to go and do some boxing and then I'll be back. I've just got to do some boxing and then a quick conference call and go to my house and then I'll take you to lunch. I promise. It'll be lovely. Oh God. Yeah.

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So but no, it is even just kind of because there's an instinct like when you're a mother, when your baby cries, you want to like, take it.

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Absolutely. And Josh, you know, is back at work full time now. So like his kind of time with her is her fade before bed and then putting her down a quiet time. Yeah. Yeah.

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So but I'll hear her crying and I'll come. It's fine honey. Just give it to me.

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He's like yeah yeah I can do it. Yeah. I'm her father. Yeah. I need to like she needs to get used to being with me as well because. You don't want one of those babies that, like, can only be with their mother and that's, you know, puts the pressure on you so much because you're like, I can't I can't do anything without the child attached to me. Yeah.

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So I've learned now I have to actually put my headphones on and go and sit in the garden. Really, because I can't I can't hear I talk to your other daughter, that's all.

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Come on. You can't talk to Bonnie. We looked after Bonnie for a little while. It was so funny because she's just not an affectionate dog. I mean, she is in her own way back when she should come and stand with her. But, yeah, your head. And she's like, fine, if you want to scratch my butt, you want to.

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But it was so funny because we had her for like a week and we were slowly starting to understand what she likes. Yeah. Like where she likes to be scratched on. Yeah.

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But she likes some things which she doesn't like others and sometimes she'd be sitting there.

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I wish I could show you the visual, but she'd be like really a bit frightened, like how you were patting her and your eyes would be darting around and I'd be like, oh my God, she obviously does a lot of that.

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And then she actually got a bit angry with this sometimes. I don't think I told you this. So we would take her to the little park near our apartment for a little, you know, some some toilet business.

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Yeah. And there's a big park across the street. Oh, yeah. So any time and then every now and then, like once a day, we take her to the big park which she loved and she got so much attention. Everyone was literally stuff.

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We were walking around like, oh my God, you dog so cute. I'm like, thank you.

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Isn't she adorable? Yes.

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And they like what Brady is that I'm like I think she's a she but you know, but I'm not really sure.

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Oh, my God. Anyway, so then when we would take her to the little park, she'd get shitty. Yeah. And take her to the big park. She actually a few times would like like not walk. She'd stop and be like, no, no, we're not going to be fuck.

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Yeah. So you know, I basically feel like I'm a mother now. So how to raise a child. She's definitely an odd one. When we were on the yacht she came out. So my mom stayed with AVAM when we went on the yacht last weekend on the weekend beforehand and I'm twenty four times.

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But she came out and we put everything in the Uber and drove away and then I get this phone call when we're on the yacht and mom's like she won't come back inside. I've tried to like pull her color, I've tried to talk sternly so she literally had to put me on speakerphone while I scolded Buddy. I'm like, Bunny going to bed.

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And like, these stewardesses are looking at me going, what the hell is this woman doing?

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But even when we face time, do you when you're away, she just was like, oh yeah. Like I don't think she understood that.

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Obviously she's a dog, but like even like hearing your voice and stuff like that, she's like, yeah, yeah.

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It's probably more just confusing than anything. She added to only took her about three days to get over the fact she thought she'd been like abandoned. Yeah, she was all right. And she she would like come and sit near us near the couch and she would allow us to pet her.

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Oh, you're so lucky. And I was getting her to do tricks, which I'm not sure with. She had to do this before, but yeah. Josh said she did. Yeah.

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I mean, look, babe, she she learns something new and he's like, yeah, I told her that like yeah.

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He's the guy I wanted. I was like, it's not likely that she's all of a sudden started like jumping up for a snack.

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She sees spins around, jumps up and down. Exactly. And then I think before we were talking to you, like, speaking of all these hot weather. Oh. About you, you were going to an air base. Oh, my God. What happened?

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Oh, my God. So, yeah, because I came here just before we were leaving tonight.

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So basically we had a heatwave in Sydney and I booked an air bay just so that we could be in air conditioning, so Ava could get some sleep for a couple of days.

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And I'd message to the woman beforehand. And I said, is it possible to check in early because my daughter hasn't been sleeping well and we really need the air con. Yeah. And she's like, yeah, sure. Blah, blah, blah. I was like, OK, so we get out there and there's no fucking air con in the rooms with the air con. So there was like one thing in the living room. Oh my God.

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But it's such an Australian thing to be like, yes, there's air conditioning. Yeah. It's only one air conditioner in one room. Exactly. Such an Aussie thing.

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Like if you go anywhere else in the world and they say it's air conditioning, it's air conditioning everywhere.

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And especially because I emailed her and said, oh, this is the reason I'm coming now. I'm just sitting in front of a fan.

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Yeah, well, the room was still the same, like it was hotter than our house because at least our house is big. So it's airy. Oh, no.

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The whole point of view booking it was to have like a cool house.

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Yeah. So we messaged her and I was like, look, you know, I had emailed you blah blah blah. And she goes, OK, well, cancel the booking and I'll pay you back for one of the nights. Yeah. And I was like, OK, whatever. So I can't do that. And they obviously gave me back the cleaning fee because we walked in and walked back out. And then I messaged her like two days ago and I was like, oh hey, I thought you were going to.

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On me, and she's like, oh, no, they refunded you the cleaning fee, that's that's enough. What? Yeah, but she didn't even say that. No, but I was like also like.

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I wouldn't have stayed there anyway, but you told me that I was going to get refunded one night. Yeah, that could have swayed my decision.

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She had just been like, oh, you're only getting the cleaning feedback.

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You would have been like, oh, well, should we stay or whatever you booked for one night, two nights.

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So I was going to still have to pay for one night and I booked as well the day before. So I'm like, it's not like you've lost out on other customers. No, she was empty anyway.

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Yeah. So you didn't say there at all? No. So you walked in and walked out. Yes. And then two nights and. Yeah. Well I know that doesn't seem right.

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Really doesn't. I would be putting on my Karen wig and disputing that.

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I know. I know. I've been meaning to come on you guys. You chased basically chased hot dog. When we go to parking say I'm much better like in the moment if you will wake you.

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I'm like, yeah, probably if I hadn't spoken to that parking inspector, if we hadn't found them that day, I would have just paid the parking fine. Yeah.

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Whereas if I had done with something right in the moment that I'm like, that's fucking blind and literally up and down the streets of Sydney, like trying to please park and found them bizarrely.

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And then they were just like, oh, it's not my fault. That's so crazy.

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I would have been very, very I know I can probably dispute it with their baby. I'm just like. Well, it's so hard and it's pretty luck, I mean, for her to do that, too. Oh, knowing that you're like a mom with a daughter.

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Well, that's the other thing is I was just like that's actually like to me, I'm like, there's lots and lots of people out there like, OK, so it was like five hundred and fifty six hundred dollars. But I'm like, there's lots of people out there that would have spent that money to get to get their daughter some sleep. Yep. But an air conditioner.

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Yeah I know 600. That's how much that air conditioning cost. That was six hundred dollars.

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But I was like you know that could really mess someone she didn't really know.

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I mean I guess what I name is what it really is. Karen.

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Karen if you like saying fuck you Suchiate bitch you and your stupid air conditioner.

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It's not air conditioning. That's false advertising. Exactly. We're going to go to some board or something and write a letter in the air being tribunal. OK, I'll take you to court. You know what?

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We used to have an airplane be above us in this apartment building. You know, I complain to them so many times about all sorts of things.

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They probably noise people throwing rubbish down into our balcony.

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Nothing. Yeah. And never did anything about it. Like, they were like, thanks for your complaint.

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And yeah, like I'm paying a fortune to live in this apartment building and some douche bag is abandoning their apartment.

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[00:14:01]

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[00:14:11]

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[00:14:17]

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[00:14:24]

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[00:14:39]

I know that since having Ava, I have been making sure I do not miss my vitamins every day because at the end of the day, I need every little bit of energy I can possibly get.

[00:14:53]

So if you guys are wanting to get a little boost in your February, you are in luck because you can actually get fifty percent of your first care of order by using the code. Dear Diary, fifty at take care of dot com.

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We did actually go and look at a house that was for sale.

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Oh did you. Yeah.

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So about like my two things that I must have is now air conditioning. Yeah. Oh my gosh. And a pool for space so that I can put a pool in. Yeah.

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Or Jacuzzi or something. Not a pool. Yeah. I want a pool but Josh is like he just he must think I'm totally delusional because we went to visit this place and I was like babe it's only like six hundred grand over our budget.

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That's like not that much. He's like Hannah and also do I imagine you'd be like me.

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Like I go for the vision. I'm like, yes, this is great. And we'll worry about the money later.

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But like having a pool there. Well, no, like this place has like an outdoor fireplace. Oh, wow. A pool, two decks. It's four bedrooms. It's gorgeous. It's only ten minutes from where we live now. Only six hundred grand over budget.

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Except when you look at that over thirty years, do nothing.

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This thing which I do, which is how I justify it, like renting the house I'm in now where I'm like we just won't go out for dinner.

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Yes. Like we won't go out for dinner.

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We'll stop drinking somewhere and start drinking Sauvignon Blanc. Like who did this? Do you know how much we're saving by this? I'm like, I can't can't like any cosmetic like. Yeah. Rejuvenation or things while I'm pregnant. That's hey, I don't smoke anymore. You know how much we'd spend if I smoke. I have managed to find like an extra seven thousand dollars a week somehow in money we can now put towards my outdoor fireplace. Maybe we should go for a bigger place, less much money.

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Exactly.

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And I literally come up with all these. Things and then like like it was with this place as well, you know, then I'm like, oh yeah. So we went to like the French bistro twice that week.

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And then we like are at like a long gray beard, like a Stilo, these big restaurants. And the only reason we took up was saying that we wouldn't do any of that. Yeah, it's just justifying it in your own life.

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Maybe you don't have to go to the meat shop every week.

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Well, yeah, I was about to say he can eat steaks from Kohl's or something, but I can't even. I can't even. You can't do this. I have no clothes or chicken. Such as. No, I'm such honestly a butcher snob. A butcher snob.

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I just need like a butcher sponsor I think.

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Yeah. We've already we mentioned like, what is it, brutalise like 18000 times. And they asked us to do a podcast from their place. So I mean, I feel like that's us in the door to all the chicken I know. Well on the weekend I actually so I started like this kind of healthy eating, exercising thing on Monday. And so on the weekend I was like, OK, feeding everything you can.

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And then I got the oh no, I had it bad. Tell me all this Sunday night you couldn't eat the food, you know, so I could eat or like I was supposed to start this Mai Tai, Mai Tai or whatever on Monday morning at seven a.m..

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But I couldn't get there because I had a dog tell me because I'd eaten so much shit on the weekend that like right off the entire week.

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No. Well, I was there just an hour ago. Yes. But, you know, I was like I was like, oh, okay. So maybe like I think you're used to eating what you want, but you don't actually eat that much unhealthy food.

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Like I had a kebab on Sunday night. I think you perhaps not bad. That was it. Oh my God.

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Just now I but like it's not like deep fried or it's not like cheese. Is that what type of meat is that though.

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That shaved stuff. Just grilled chicken isn't it. I don't know. This one was beef. I think.

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Yeah, I think, I mean if you I think the bread's unhealthy and I think the cheese no issues, no cheese.

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And it was a flour tortilla. Yeah. They're not that good if you shut up.

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Anyway, you were telling me proudly that you had a kebab. Yes I was.

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I ate a kebab and I got a dodgy tummy. Oh no cycleways.

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The kebab. Yeah. But I think it was like it was a Mosman kebab. So it was more like a like wanky like Turkish fancy kebab instead of like a Saariaho for still got food poisoning from it.

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So it wasn't food poisoning.

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I just ate too many cupcakes. Yeah. You're like oh I've got food poisoning and it's literally just the right to cupcakes. Yeah, pretty much. Pretty much.

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Do you have a diary entry for us this week.

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I do. It's very innocent. Oh and very excitable. How very not like you. I know. Right.

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Well it's kind of funny actually. So this was just after my interview.

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Yes. At the cafe. Yeah. When I was moving to the big smile.

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My God. She's come into the city. Yes.

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She in Dangar Island. Bahat. I know. You know. Hilarious.

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I still would travel from Denga. Oh, really? Yeah, for like I think four or five months to come all the way into the city. Yeah. Wow.

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So I would catch the Tempa six three in the morning and then I would start work at eight o'clock and then I'd finish at three p.m. and then I'd be home at like six thirty seven. So I was gone for like 13 hours a day.

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You've really committed to that life decision didn't you.

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Oh yeah, I loved it. I just hated school that much.

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Like I hate it that much. I'm going to work in a cafe. Exactly. And I really find it.

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So dear diary. Oh my God. I just got back from my interview at Glendon George and I feel like I'm floating in the clouds.

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Oh, for a Tasco job, you idiot. It is this super cool cafe on George Street right in the middle of the city. And you can walk to Circular Quay in like five minutes. They're looking for someone five days a week and seven hours a day from eight to three. And it's cash in hand, which is awesome because I'm not supposed to be working full time.

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And yet it's six dollars an hour.

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Oh. So I'll be earning nearly 200 dollars.

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Oh, how times have changed. Oh, God. And I set the scene just very briefly.

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So this cafe is literally steps away from this Sydney Opera House and minutes away, like you could probably walk around the corner and see the Sydney Harbour Bridge say literally went for middle of the middle of the middle of the big city.

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And then we the other day talking about it and we like, let's look it up, like we should go there one day and let's look it up on Google Maps and it's not there anymore.

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I know, but it was about two years ago. Yeah. It got it got demolished. They put it in a tram.

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Yeah. They literally just got ripped up that entire street.

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And I was so excited because I was like, we're finally going to get to see where you spent all these years and these can go.

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I think I was there for about nine months and I had a fight with the boss. Right? Oh, funnily enough, the bosses, Helen.

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And she seems so nice. Hi, Helen.

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She said she would let me know in the next few days. I only have my experience. It changes the fish and chip shop at the moment.

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But if I could work here for a while, then I just know I could be a full time waitressing aspirations for Asians living the dream, making toast.

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I'm just so excited and I can't believe this is happening. And this is where my little sass comes in. Yeah. Who needs boys when I could have a full time job?

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I'm a real woman and that's what I thought. I didn't need boys. Yeah. Cos I could be a full time Tosk.

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Yeah, you're like a career girl.

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You're like, I'm going to venture into the big world of making time. Yeah, exactly like that. You lofland go. I'll let you know as soon as I hear back.

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But I have all my fingers in all my toes crossed now so I have to tell you on the weekend.

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The are you doing? Are you pulling your weight out? Yes, she is literally rearranging her underwear. I'm sorry. And hot from the sky. No, thank you. Thank you for sitting at my dining table. You're sweating. Yes. You swear says that I should have brought it up.

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So one of Josh's friends came over on the weekend. So the husband and wife, and she's got her first.

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The little girl's got her first year of high school this year. And then they've got a little boy to tell her to drop out and go back home. No, I did not.

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But she's still like a little girl, you know, like you say about yourself at that age, you know?

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So Josh freaked out because I said to him, I was like, oh, honey, do you realize that, like, I was one year older than her when I left school and started working and his face because he's putting two and two together and going, yeah, she's just a child.

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Yeah. You were just a child. Yeah.

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You weren't because you were selling your family's belongings.

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And my family, if I could free peanut butter and stuff like that. Yeah.

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So it was I was different.

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But it is really weird when you see girls that are that young and you realize like, oh, that's when I started working full time and you're asking your mom if you can have some Sprite, you know, like I had shares in Sprite when I was your dollar and I actually do not have a stock portfolio already.

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What do you even taste like?

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So where you living? Like, you know, what do you rent or do you buy? She's like, can I have some Sprite? Yeah, exactly. I like, do you have a flatmate or are you living on your own?

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Oh, poor Josh.

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It is it's very, very strange to to actually when you see a girl that age. Yeah. Because like I joke about it and laugh about it, but I'm like, oh my God.

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She was still so say but it's like when you see people and talk, talk and stuff these days and they're like 19 and my guys, 19 year old kids and being they're being followed around by paparazzi and and they're driving, you know, really expensive cars. Tick tock stars.

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Yeah.

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And I'm like, but you still Kades Like I was like driving like a secondhand hand-me-down car that belonged to someone in my family.

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And, you know, you're definitely not like out being followed and being asked to comment on the latest controversy surrounding you on Ticktock.

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And, you know, and you think at 19, what, you know, would they even know what to say? Or, of course, they're going to say the wrong thing.

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Yeah, they literally oh, that's what I go with, like, you know, poor little Britney and Justin and stuff. I'm like, what chance did they have?

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They had no sort of normal life or anything. Of course, they went off the bloody rails. Yeah.

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But I guess back in those days, in our day, they would have had people behind them, like they would have had managers and.

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Yeah. Whereas these days kids on tock it all of a sudden they get a couple of million followers.

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They probably don't have a crew of people to help them or talent or talent.

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So if you can do these, I'm doing the dancers.

[00:26:25]

I still don't really get ticktock. My favorite part actually of The Bachelor this year was this girl on it. She was really pretty Asian girl. She acted about twenty two, but she was actually thirty four. Oh did you watch it. But she said to him like as she ended up leaving that night but she was like, you know, I just need some more attention.

[00:26:48]

I could be messaging like tick stars and I like oh wait, I remember that that's gold because she had said that like some massive tech talker had messaged. Yeah. And she's like, oh, my God, darling, do you know you're like one out of 100 girls? It's probably messaging. Why?

[00:27:06]

I do not know any other.

[00:27:09]

And also to I don't have time to like rehearse stuff. I have time to rehearse dances or learn dances. You're great on take time. No, but I very aware I do stuff that's like minimal effort. I'm a very, very talented human being.

[00:27:25]

I mean, I know I'm doing this podcast, but I could be off messaging.

[00:27:27]

You know, I take tuxedoes. Exactly.

[00:27:30]

Don't you know who I am? Right. We really are. OK, I'm going to go and have a shower. So gosh.

[00:27:39]

And also to we asked recently for you guys to send us through your breakup stories, which is going to be something exciting we're doing soon. And we have been inundated with stories.

[00:27:52]

I have been reading and responding to some of you, and you are hilarious and very honest, so excited to chat with you and share these stories because they are so funny. They are keeping me entertained at three o'clock in the morning when I was screaming in my ear. So thank you. Keep them coming. Stay tuned. Yes. Chat to you next week.

[00:28:13]

Five. OK, guys, thanks so much for listening today. Please go online and get involved. You can follow us on Instagram and Twitter at Hannas podcast. Please subscribe on Apple podcast, Spotify or wherever you get your podcast. The way we do business has changed. That's why at IP Telecom, we developed IP one, a cloud based all in one communication solution with unlimited calling and free video conferencing. IPTV one enables easy, remote working with soft phone apps, Microsoft teams and CRM integrations.

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You can make and receive calls anywhere from any device. Add in a fixed monthly price and IPTV one is the perfect solution for your business.

[00:28:58]

Talk to us today at IP Telecom DOT IEEE Charge up for a family adventures with the Land Rover range of Plug-In Hybrid Electric Vehicles with pioneering hybrid technology. The Land Rover range offers the perfect balance of efficiency, power and performance both on and off, making every journey effortlessly refined. Enjoy the road less traveled with ease. Explore the 2021 Land Rover Range of Plug-In Hybrids and Land Rover Dartez Land Rover above and beyond.