Let me ask you to when is the last time that you spoke to your pussy, like verbally out loud? Great job, girl. Yeah, like you're killing it.
Hi, guys, welcome back to another episode of Girl's Got to Eat. Welcome back. Happy Valentine's for you. I don't know, actually, with my Valentine again. And thank you guys for coming to the live show. It was so much fun that the guests were unbelievable. It was so great. And I think that we get better at putting these shows together every single time. I'm so proud of how much like how fun there. No one does a better stay humble.
Well, if you guys missed it, we have made it available for you guys streaming through the 18th. You guys can get a ticket for it, stream it on your computer, your TV, whatever. Girls get your podcast dotcom, go to live shows, get tickets there and you can stream it through the 18th. Yeah, they things for our partners. Thanks to Daily Harvest's for supporting girls. Got to Eat Daily Harvest is a life saver at Daily Harvest.
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Go to a function of beauty dotcom sluggy to take your quiz and save twenty percent on your first order has never been softer. I know some. I'll get into it. We are going to get to do the only thing that's going on in my life, which is the Britney Doc Bretheren. Talk about Britney. We want to we have a oh, we have a special surprise for you guys this week. On Thursday, we have a bonus episode.
Remember, it's our three year anniversary week. We started the podcast this week three years ago in twenty eighteen. I can't believe it.
Have you ever been together for three or have you've been listening to my voice on the podcast for three years? Listen, we're looking for a producer so I can stop talking about it for three years. Maybe they can answer our emails to talk it out of that.
Yes. So I'm running the company, basically. Yeah, but yeah, we have a bonus episode on Thursday. It's our three year anniversary. We're going to we're not going to give that away, but that is going to be our special anniversary episode. So that's why we're doing it. Three years then. Is that all of our really announcements on MLS? Yeah. Yeah. If you guys are a new listener, all the resources on our website, girls, Kapono Secombe live shows, all the dope merge every episode we've ever done.
You can search it. We get a lot of emails saying, have you done an episode on this? We worked really hard to put those on the website, so go ahead and search it. Everything's there. Last week we talked about dhuey and pet loss and grief. And you guys, I mean, I've never gotten so many messages and emails and story tags and just really the most incredible support and people sharing their stories. So I just want to really say thank you to everybody who reached out.
I have not responded to everybody yet. I have an email folder maybe get to it's it's just growing by the day. But I really cannot thank you guys enough. Like, I only have enough hours in the day to respond to everybody. But I am so appreciative. People just said that the kindest, sweetest, most incredible stuff like so loving. So I just really appreciate the response to that. I just wanted to give a really quick update on that.
I had said that I was going to go do this little ceremony, I guess, with Dewey's ashes on February 4th, which is the day I got him also like his pseudo birthday. And I was going to do it at Dewey Beach, which was where he was named after. And so I went down there on the fourth. My family came down there, Matt and my mom, my dad obviously were outside. And it was like one of the most beautiful, cathartic experiences I've had.
I the day itself was the most beautiful day I've ever seen in Dewey Beach. I've been going there my entire life. I used to live there. I have that's the place I've been the most aside from like my childhood home. Like, it was unbelievable. I sent you pictures and you were like, what did you do with these photos? Like, how did you edit them? They were just it was something it looked like the colors, like the way the the the ocean was coming up was like different.
Like I was like, Matt, what is going on here? He was like, I don't know. He was like, it is the time of day. We just had a storm. It kind of does look like this. But this is like building. I've never seen it look like this. And so it was just I just felt like there were signs all around me. We stood around as a family and like, really, it wasn't like crying, you know, it was like a lot of laughing and it was sharing these memories of Dewey and just talking about him that we each had like a little I'm keeping most of his ashes, but we had like a Ziploc bag of like our own little of ashes.
And we just kind of, like, spread them. Into the ocean and then right as I was like getting done with my little bag. This wave came up, it didn't even like crash. It just knocked me off my feet like it had been this really calm day. And I almost fell over. And I hear Matt laughing. I was stunned, but I was wearing snow boots in the water. I was just a very cute family photo there, too.
All bundled up. Yeah. I have a question for you. I'm glad you broke the ice and laugh because I was like, am I allowed to ask that? OK, when you are scattering ashes, how do you not end up with them all over your body?
Well, there was a there was wind blowing in and I was like walking and kind of like I grabbed some of my hands and then just like kind of like sifted it out into the water and it just blew up. But, yeah, my hands were ashy. I couldn't imagine how it was done. I was thinking about you just like taking the bag and dumping the whole bag. So, Lotter, who do you think did that?
What do you think? Did I look over and it was just dump it his baggy in the water because, you know, it was like hasseltine. I was like, wow, way to make it. Like a really non-special I was doing handfuls, like letting them flow into the ocean.
And I was like, oh yeah. Like he was done before anybody else. I looked up just dump it and that's just one shot. Lee's trying to get to the bar, you know, and I respect it.
But we did. We brought a bottle of move and so we all did like a toast, you know, like I mean, nobody's on the beach. It's winner. It was a cold day, but it was a beautiful day. And I didn't even I got a little choked up. And, you know, I cry all the time. I've been crying so much, I didn't even really cry. It was this really uplifting special experience. I feel like I got this sign from Dewey that not like he came in, literally knocked me off my feet and always fucking around out to find out I was like, mad, videoed it.
We were just dying, laughing. We were like, that was from Dewey, like always out here going so hard. But we it was just really special. Like, I was low key, dreading it. Like earlier in the day when I unscrewed the box with the ashes, I started to cry. I had a really hard time. I was like, this is the day I got it. I'm like, this is just really brutal. And then something about that little ceremony memorial we did like changed my whole outlook.
I feel like I fully said goodbye. It was weird. It was like weirdly like I got closure. I feel like I can now actually start to think about the possibility of maybe getting another dog. Like it just was really we all felt so like I don't know how to describe it. We felt really positive and happy and like a lot of joy. And we even went to another bar afterwards and sat outside, of course, and like had drinks like we were just really it was a good vibe.
It was really good energy. I truly felt like he was there. I've never seen it look like that in my entire life. I haven't either. I just I love you got this closure. I think it's like a really beautiful moment and like, what a nice way to say goodbye to your parents could come with you. Yeah. I was like, really so special. And his name is Dewey. You buried him and doing your dad dumping and buried him.
But yeah, but it's actually the ocean. So anyway, I just wanna give an update on that. You know, obviously I wasn't trying to make anybody sad. I feel like that was like a happy story. So I just wanted to give an update and thank you guys again for all the love and support you guys really like. I mean, especially this week, but over the years have shared so much of your lives with us. And we are so honored that you share your stories with us.
I mean, I know that you guys tell us stuff that you don't tell your closest friends. You don't tell your family. You share stories about so much loss and so much triumph. And we are so honored to be like a safe space for that stuff. Yeah. Thanks, guys. Yeah, thank you. I mean, we'll talk more about it on our three or so today. Last year we were had two shows the night of the 15th in San Diego.
Yeah. That was a love San Diego. That was so fun. And then that morning oh maybe it was that morning of the show or the next morning. Now that more into the show where I and I talked about this at the San Diego shows and at the L.A. show, I heard this couple arguing next to me in the hotel and she had to listen to I guess, who cares?
I don't think you had it. I don't remember the new guys. We both had crazy experiences at that hotel. Yeah, but I had heard this couple arguing, which I was kind of annoyed because I'm like, OK, I don't like to hear other people in a hotel. I should to have some peace and quiet in a hotel, you know what I mean? Like, these walls are so thin. And I was like, kind of annoyed, but no big deal.
I wasn't trying to sleep. It was in the morning. This was like nine a.m. and then I hear it get a little escalated to the point where I was like, OK, the this man is yelling at his girlfriend or wife a little more than I would like, you know, like I am on edge. And they called out to the desk. If I feel like there's going to be a physical altercation and they start going back and forth, she diffuses the situation a little bit.
He calms down and then they're going back and forth. And I'm hearing muffled like fighting. And then I just hear her go. When was the last time you ate my pussy? And I was like, oh, my God. I sat down, I took a seat. I was like, I got to see this through. She almost called the front desk because actually loves to call the front desk about the size of her pillows and everything else going out of the room.
And you were like, I'm not stopping this for once. You know, I could tell, you know, there was a moment where you're like, you were late coming down.
Oh, my God. This is going to escalate, someone's going to get hurt, and then he took it down a notch. He was obviously not going to do anything physical. And when she said one was last time you ate my pussy, I was like, what's he going to say?
Let's be honest. I never asked you. Did you ever hear what he said back? I don't he it's like. Muffled He just. No, it wasn't he didn't yell back. What was I saying? You suck my dick. He definitely did not.
But they were like he I think what he said to her, if I if I can really try to rock my brain and remember, it was something like I do stuff for you all the time. Like, I think that was his like I do it all the time or I do something. I think that was that like I do it all the time. I do stuff for you all the time. He just took that road. This is so funny that we had a very different morning.
That day I laid a a curling iron directly on my head, the whole stack, and just like seared my left head. That was pretty bad. And then I accidentally melted out at the show later to the audience. I mean, you're welcome. San Diego, stay classy. San Diego. So speaking of pussies, we have a great episode today. It is all about your pussy talking to it, having better orgasms, all that stuff. So we're going to get to it with Kozmic.
But before we do, we just want to address something that has been on our minds and that we wanted to bring awareness to, and that is the spike in violence and hate crimes against Asian-Americans in this country. And we, of course, denounce this. I think that goes without saying the spike is related to the coronavirus. And, you know, ultimately the hateful rhetoric from our former president that has emboldened people to take these violent actions. And it makes me sick to think that we had the whole time during a pandemic and he was calling it the China virus and whatever else.
So it's just sickening and it's frustrating. It's not really getting a lot of coverage. And so we just wanted to use our platform to bring attention to it. Anti-Racism includes all minorities. And at this time, we just want to draw attention to this and tell our our listeners and that are a part of the Asian community that we are we are there on our minds and we support them. We would respond. I encourage you guys to speak out against it and support your Asian friends, community members and businesses and to amplify the voices of these people that are talking about this.
And we had planned to discuss this, but we have gotten some messages from you guys and we obviously are listening. And we wanted to read an email from one of our listeners that we thought might resonate with others and let others know how the members of the Asian community might be feeling right now. Yeah, we got our listener email from a listener named Sorina, and we just want to use her words. She gave us permission. Yes. She said I would never put you guys on blast without asking for permission, but we appreciate it.
So we're going read it to you. So Serena says since covid hit, there's been a lot of hate crimes against Asian-Americans throughout the country. I know you all did an amazing job touching on the violence against African-Americans this summer and the resources you provided and ways that we can all help. I'm hoping you can use your platform to bring awareness to all the hate crimes being committed against Asian-Americans and especially the elderly Asian-Americans who have seemed to have been targeted extremely often as of late.
I will say that growing up as a first generation immigrant and Asian-American in the States, I've always been taught to just mind my own business and stay quiet to fit in. I think that's the upbringing of a lot of us Asians, especially first generation immigrants received. It's even hard for myself to know what I should and can do, but I find myself being extremely saddened because like all immigrants, we come here hoping for a better life and to be ostracized and hated because of a virus that we have no control over is just really horrific.
It also seems like even with all the attacks that have happened recently, the mainstream media hasn't done much to report on it. And maybe it's because us Asians don't make a lot of noise and we're not prone to protesting and being outspoken, but I don't think it makes what's happening any less newsworthy or important anyways. I know that if anyone can do the topic justice, it's YouTube and I really appreciate all that you do. Thank you. Thank you for writing that to us.
We've gotten a few hours. I've just kind of been in the DMS talking to some of you guys about it and trying to see who I can follow. Chrissy Teigen, you know, no, not a hot take, but she's got she's posted some great resources and just kind of like stats, people to follow, organizations you can support. And you have a great one. Do you want to share and just small businesses in general. You know, if you think back to the very beginning of the coronavirus, I remember the very first thing I actually posted on Instagram about the coronavirus was about Asian American businesses being targeted specifically and people no longer going to Chinatown and the small businesses.
And, you know, these are the really small businesses that have really struggled since day one at the beginning of covid, like so many other businesses. Right. Salons, restaurants, things like that. So obviously, the first thing you have to do is educate yourselves. The second things you do is support these small businesses that are really struggling, that have really taken a hit since day one. And one organization that I really like, which has been reported on quite a bit last few days, is called Enough Is Enough.
It's an initiative by Asian-American business owners in New York City, tons of really amazing Asian-American owned restaurants. Eric Say, who owns eight, eight, six and a couple of restaurants in your city. Is that the head of this? But it's meant to raise awareness on recent surges in hate crimes against. Americans, so they're doing a number of things, they focus on donating meals to homeless shelters, particularly those located in Chinatown with a large Asian-American population.
And then in addition to that, in addition to donating the meals, the group is also organizing virtual cooking classes with Asian chefs that you guys can take. Initially, they wanted to raise ten thousand dollars. As of right this minute, they're up to thirty five thousand. So you guys can go. It's give buttar dotcom. The hashtag is hashtag. Enough is enough to donate. And of course, just continue to educate yourselves, continue to have those tough discussions.
We are really honored to be a platform to raise awareness for these kind of things. And we really appreciate the emails and the messages. Yeah, I cosign and we're going to move on. Yes, we're going to talk about the only thing that is important is going on in my life, which is The New York Times released a six part investigative journalism series. And one of the episodes is called Framing Britney Spears. Yeah, it is on Hulu.
It's a quick and easy watch. And it's basically it really focuses on Britney Spears basically ascension into some what we would call maybe some mental illness, captivity, captivity, the conservatorship. She's obviously not a part of it. Everybody mostly in her life, her father, her boyfriend, her, they all declined to speak, but they just they talk about she too little till now. What a conservatorship is really super interesting. And you really just see this girl that was like a happy, well-adjusted, everyday girl.
She grew up in Louisiana, really descend into some pretty sad madness. And like, who could blame her? Yeah. I mean, what I feel like overwhelmingly watching her as a kid, as a teenager, as a young woman, is that she was like really genuinely a good person. She is a good person with a good heart. She did have a mean bone in her body.
She was just like this sweet girl, not yet a woman. And to see where she is now, she's like out of her body. She's like out of her mind. Like, I don't know what we're watching. People think it's coated. People think that she's faking it. I mean, you can I know I don't think we need to explain at this point. Britney Spears, Instagram, it's like really kind of sad to see. It's hard to watch.
And it's like what is going on here? Is she fully in captivity? Is she drugged? You know, all the stuff like that was like a good girl that just got ripped to shreds by by the media, by the media and like that's kind of like this formulaic thing and that the media does to women. And I just wanted to read this like it was it was a tweet from Haley from Parama, who I Haley compare fourth grade. I feel like she's really outspoken.
She said the framing Britney Spears doc, holy fuck. No artist today would have to endure the literal torture that media society utter misogynist inflicted upon her. The mental health awareness conversation culturally could never be where it is without the awful price she is paid. I feel like I'm gonna cry. What happened to her would never happen today. Never happened today. And also, like, I think that people are vilifying the conservatorship. And yes, I think that, like, people in her life are not don't necessarily have her best interest.
But this person does need to be taken care of. And this clearly was not a person who was born with mental illness. This is just like a nice granny that was like plucked out of obscurity and thrown into the Hollywood machine. And every single thing about her was just like ripped to shreds. And when you watch these, like journalists on national television, Diane Sawyer and Matt Lauer, that fucking creep rapist, like talking to this child about her sex life and her breasts, she's being mocked on national television for her mental health and made fun of and this is before even social media and Instagram and before like artists had a voice to tell the world, like, hey, this is what's happening to me, that she controls, that she can tell people what's going on, like the things that were allowed to go on in.
I feel like crying when I think about it, because you and I, like have experienced the very smallest amount of this where I feel like, you know, people bully us, they talk about our bodies. They can go on any thread and write about it, you know, to be the biggest superstar in the world and be a child. And having people like Diane Sawyer asked you on national television about your sex life, it's unimaginable to me.
Yeah. And, you know, I will say, like, yes, the extent to which that happened would not fly today. And I want to talk a little bit about that, too. But the formula is still there. And the person I think who speaks about this the most is Jameela Jamil, who is a former guest of ours, and she talks about it. I think she has a whole Instagram highlight called gaslighting on her Instagram, if you guys want to go watch that.
And it's about putting women, famous women, performers, entertainers on a pedestal and then ripping them down for sport. And it is taking things out of context, like she is the most open about it I've ever seen as a celebrity. And like most people have just always felt like they had to shut the fuck up and just smile and look pretty. And it's like the fact that we finally out here drawing attention to this, don't buy tabloids, don't share them, don't you know, just look at a headline on Twitter and then think that's what it's about.
Like we need to all do better in what we consume. And I think that there are starting to be like courses on this in college, in high school, maybe even have like what's real, what's fake, what are just headlines, what's click bait. And like, I don't I hate that shit. I hate the tabloids. Like, I've never bought one in my life. I've never bought a US Weekly in my life, you know what I mean?
Like, I've never been into it. I don't really think I was one of those people that was like so excited about the tearing down of Britney's. Is back in the day like I feel like even though it was quote unquote normal and everybody was kind of on board with that, I still remember thinking like this. I'm not into this. This is, like, sad. No, I remember watching her especially like she had brown eyes and thinking to myself, like, this is not a person that's well.
And this should not be like fodder for sport that should not be like be made fun of. Jay Leno is making fun of her. I think all these people I think Diane Sawyer or Jay Leno, all these people will look back at their behavior and understand that it not age. Well, I think this is just was the norm. Yeah, that's not OK. But there are certain things adjusted in age while we know that. But I watched and I thought, like, this is not like a well person and there's no, like, formula for fame.
No one is born knowing how to be famous. And all of a sudden, like her entire life is on display and she's being carted out of her house in a stretcher to a mental institution. And like people are like mocking her, making fun of her. You would never be OK after that. Like, I watch her Instagram. I'm like, this person's not well, but like, how could you be? Well, yeah, the just the Justin Timberlake thing alone.
Like, everyone just decided that Britney cheated on him and they were Team Justin. And then that was the narrative like that was it. And who knows if you don't really know. And the journals were asking him, did you fuck Britney Spears? Be honest, she's a quish. Yeah. This is just like your high school girlfriend. She's like out here, like, trying to keep up this, like, virginal thing. And then the moms that would be so mad at her and that one mom said, like, I wish I could shoot her or something crazy, like governor's wife.
And then they brought that up to her in an interview and like, made her cry. Like she was just literally I felt like people were ripping her apart for sport and like to see it on that documentary. It was like, fuck. And I have always had a huge problem with scene like hoards of paparazzi. I mean, we know how Princess Diana died. It's sick. It's fucking sick. It's so sick that like a person can't walk to their car without being mobbed by men with cameras.
But it's just I think so many things like flu back in the day, like when I think about like growing up and seeing all these, like, funny skits about like R. Kelly peeing on girls, Dave Chappelle parody and SNL period, all these like Michael Jackson stuff. And it was like we all knew Michael Jackson was having sex with children. We all knew our Kelly was a creep. And we just like did that for fun and even believe it.
I just none of this stuff would fly today making fun of, like, a really mentally not well person would fly. And I read this interesting article. Craig Ferguson was being interviewed and he didn't and he refused to talk about her and make fun of her. And he thought it was gonna be like the end of his career that he, like, refused to do it. And it's so interesting to me that that idea was so outside of the box to not rip down this child.
And it's just I don't know. I really I feel for her. I don't know I don't know enough about the conservatorship. I do think this is somebody that needs to be protected from herself. I don't know from who, though, you know, like, I don't know I don't know anything about her family. You never know what's going on with these people behind closed doors. Yeah, but I'm I'm also like, what? You know, we can only do so much like I don't really know what the actionable things here, like we can just kind of like do better with what we consume and try not to let this happen to someone again.
You know, people they did do they do protest and there's this whole Britney free Britney movement. But like, we can't I mean, I don't know what the average person can do. What I don't understand what her sister is doing. Where's Felicia? I was like, Felicia, what are you doing now? Step in.
And so my take on like the Felicia things specifically, if you guys don't know that she was sort of like Britney Spears is handler growing up as a family friend. But I looked at her and I look at her life and like, this is just a person who is just like a simple woman from Louisiana, like was Britney Spears is basically like handler assistant. And like this isn't a person like understands, like the Hollywood machine, right? Yeah, I've no idea.
I don't know. I mean, I hoped I guess now it's like they're saying that it's being more is being looked at. I thought that it did kind of end. I'm confused. The conservatorship. Yeah. Like recently there was a big court ruling. So the end of the documentary and yeah, it is a little confusing. They have a lawyer come in and actually break down a conservatorship is. But what they talked about was how she petitioned for her father to not be.
Jamie Lynn would be. And they struck that down. And they what they did was they added another another person that she had wanted. I saw I saw her in concert in Atlanta, like second wave of Britney, like the circus tour. So I did see her. She did the biggest residencies. She put out another album like I don't work and she was working. It's sad. I listen, I'm glad you and I talked about this a lot this week.
I'm glad how far we've come. I'm glad that it's not OK to talk about these things that, like the very people that were discussing these things with her on national television, would never dare do things like that. I don't think we would mark a mentally ill person like. Yeah, I don't think so. So I'm glad those things are changing. I'm glad for things like Instagram that like people can have a voice and say, like, this is fucking happening, like the Dixie Chicks, like like I think about what happened to them.
And like, they didn't have their own platform on social media, like celebrities and performers have today to tell you what really happened. Like, you just have to let the media decide. And I'm just so glad people can control their own narratives. I think about all the time I think about the Metoo movement. I think about when it comes to the way people can talk to women, when it comes to the things people can do to women and how they can threaten women.
And it's like we've just come so far, the Metoo movement I think about I just feel grateful for every single day, like I will talk. We have one more rock for you guys. And there was a there is a scene in the. The show, which takes place in the early 2000s, and I just remember watching it was like that wouldn't fly today, and I'm not saying it doesn't happen today or the urge isn't there, if nothing else, that men are scared and say that.
Yes. And so the goal that men, most men, all men eventually don't harass women, assault women, they respect women because they intrinsically want to they were brought up to act the right way. But like if right now they're just not doing it because they're scared, fine. We scared them, you know, like I love it. Like, we see this shit just doesn't fly. And like, so much progress has been made. It's not perfect.
And women are still getting assaulted and they're still getting sexually harassed. And but we have come so far where at least you can watch a documentary like the Britney Spears documentary and be like that shit won't fly today. Now, I mean, I think that we know that to be true. I know I think that what we see today is not on a media level. It's on a more like micro level where like people are just leaving comments on, like, I see this all the time.
Every female celebrity, the things people say to them are terrible. You know, like I mean, I guess that's what we can do is just remember that all these people are people. They read these comments, they see this stuff. Your words are hurtful. Not everybody is just like a person with a shield up it. It hurts to have people say things about your life and the way that you look and the decisions you made. And you don't know anything about what's going on in somebody's life.
Right. So these things hurt. And when you repost things, making fun of people and leaving terrible comments, like every one of those things chips away a little bit, you're never going to pay attention to them. But like that stuff, I'm a person. That stuff hurts me. Right. Well, we're we're with you everyday. Yeah. You're listening to the podcast. Tell your story. Oh, my God. Can you imagine? That's where she breaks her silence.
I want to hear more from her boyfriend, her hot ex boyfriend. He finally released a statement. What did you say? He called her dad did say that that was like that's like the only statement he can imagine is a dick like James. OK, Sam, go else. But listen, he's too beautiful to have a brain. Yeah, I got it.
OK, he's like he reminds me of Romayne from from selling thumbs up. Oh, my God. Oh my God.
Oh, that's our Britney deep dive will continue to to talk about it as far as updates happen, I guess for Britney.
Yeah. Freeriding then Britney, if you want to come on the show here, Sam, Sam. To if we if we all we can get a Sam fine will take it all.
Take Sam Fluffy let oh I'll take anyone to who can who will speak. Yeah. They wouldn't speak to New York Times but they'll talk to girl's got to eat or not. And we have one more bigger than the family. New York Times, The New York Times, fake news. And then we just have one more TV rack for you guys. I have to say someone said the midterms and they said you. First of all, we didn't really address this, but I was popping off about Emily in Paris getting two Golden Globe nominations.
Yeah. And like shows like I made a story you didn't like. I was popping off about it on my Instagram and someone slipped in. It was like, you need to watch Firefly Lane. And I go, What? I read the book. What are you talking about? Firefly Lane. That's a showdown because I've read the book and I read a lot of her books. Kristen Hannah, she's like a great author. And I was like, oh my gosh, I popped on Netflix top of the Netflix.
I was like, watched it all over a couple of days. And yeah, this is a book I read. It came out in 08. I wrote a few more of Kristen Hanna's books, one called Night Road will like Rip Your Heart Out and I recommend it. You we're not going to really deep dive on it. Just we're going to recommend it to you guys. I mean, the the main theme of the storyline is the female friendship, their friends since they were little.
It goes back and forth. If you watch this is us, it's very similar in terms of like the different stages of life. There's three there's like when they're kids, when they're in the workforce, early twenties and then when they're president and it goes back and forth. I thought it was so well done. I've never seen that done like three completely different time periods. I'm invested in all three of us. Does it like the best to ever do it?
I watched the part of the first episode of the session. I started crying and I couldn't cry. So it's not for me. I'm already depressed enough. I can twenty, twenty one. It's just I can't, but I thought it was great. The episodes are long. It's eight episodes, just about these two women that are best friends and then their friendship. And if you read the book and I have not, but it's a different storyline than the book, they invent some different storylines.
Yeah, it's still the book, but they add some cups, some things that didn't happen in the book. Katherine Heigl. Sarah Chalk her name. I just call her Becky. Yeah. Katherine Heigl is like the star and she's a star, kind of like a famous person in the show. But yeah, we won't spoil it. But like, I highly recommend it. I can't see anybody that wouldn't like it. Like, it's not too like flowery, cheesy, but it's not too edgy, like it's just perfect.
It's a great watch. It's a great watch. And it's not so mindless either. Like I was really involved in the story all eight episodes there long. It's like a nice long walk. Yeah. So that's on Netflix. Check it out and then and read her books. She's if you like the author, a lot of books for you to read. She's very prolific to. Those are our for this week. Check out both things for Amy, Britney and Firefly Lane.
And before we jump into talking about our pussies and orgasms, we're just going to thank a couple of our partners. I am going to talk about postseason orgasms. Yes, I'm telling you guys about dipsy gosh, we love. See, so much I can always tell you guys about some of their new content, I'm going to get the job and just like rattle some of these things off, they're going to rattle her. But I'm going to get you guys rattled up.
Riled up. Sorry, that was so. Dipsy is an audio app full of short, sexy stories designed to turn you on whether you need to unwind or you're looking for some new self care ideas or you're just trying to get out of a funk. You're really just starting to like, I don't know, you won't have an orgasm. Like you can reset and reconnect with yourself with. OK, so you go into the app, you're going have a bunch of different things to choose from these stories.
There's wellness there. Sleep so right out the gate. Some of the new releases are called Leather and Lace to Wanderlust Swipe Right. These are just some like sexy stories, office hours, office hours, three and two. And then there's just different things like that. So you can get the you can get kind of the gist. And then but what I love the most about this is these is what's so unique as there are these guided masturbation. So you can get in there and they'll just kind of walk you through how to touch yourself.
There's also like a tutorial for exploring anal play. There's sex basics. There's dirty talk one to one. Like I said, erotic meditations. There's erotic breath, work yourself, touch all these type of things. Like, that's just incredible to get in here. You can figure out anything you need to know about sex, like I'm going to do the BDM on. I'm not even sure that I'm into it, but like, I want to know more.
I can't recommend it and not having sex, but I want to know what they have to say. Yeah. So and then of course there is these, their sleep stories, bedtime stories. It'll help wind you down and maybe you just want to like masturbate while you're while you're doing it. And there's like soundscapes as well. You know, I love a soundscape and there's ones based on your Zodiac sign. Of course, there's a sexy story called cancer season, which I have all about.
So there's a term. So there's so much to choose from and for whatever you're really looking for, like there is no reason not to have this app and just like really explore what turns you on in your own eroticism and things that you might want to try out. I mean, a tutorial for anal play. Yeah, I need to do that. Get into that. I don't know how to do it. Yeah, I just I did. I'm not going to detail the guided masturbation, but they're lit and they release new stories every week.
So there's always more to explore. So you're not going to get bored. You can just run through everything in the app and you're going to get new stuff next week, too, no matter who you're into or what turns you on. And we, of course, have a discount for you guys. For listeners of the show, Dipsy is offering a 30 day free trial. When you go to dipsy stories, dotcom sluggy, that's a 30 day free trial.
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I'll do it this year to party. No it's a nice thing that you do for your body.
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All right. Let's get into it. I am so excited for our guest today. She is the founder of an online community for women. It geared towards unlocking your womb, healing through your room and activating your pussy. We're going to talk about having better orgasms. Please welcome to the show Cosmic I yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's my blessing and my pleasure to be here is this is my pussy is throbbing right now, which is a good thing. I'm active, I'm alert. So I'm excited to do this. And thank you for having me.
As we can hear the waves crashing in the background, this is like so annoying. It's like 20 degrees in New York City. And you're just out you're just outside blowing waves crashing. I don't even hate it if we want to hear that. So that's what does it for me that gets my pussy activated. Yes. Always drip it. Always. I wore makeup for you today. That look fabulous. You always you were so excited. Tell everybody where you are coming to us from and why you're there, what your story is.
All the things. All the things.
So I am currently in the Dominican Republic and I've been out here every time the water comes in, my face is just like, yes, OK, so if you see me stop, it's not weird, OK? It's just me. Just it's just me. It is an orgasm. I'm just manifest in some shit. But I've been out here for about five years and it's so, so incredible. The story. I was supposed to go to Jamaica with one of my staff members and I was seeing her a trip because I always go to Jamaica.
And literally about a month before that trip was they started talking and she said, Sis, we need something else. And I was like, OK, are we going to Brazil? Are we going to do any other place in South America? I was thinking about Dubai and literally Dominican Republic came up and I never really even looked for it. And so I literally Googled a blog like the YouTube blogs. And I was like, OK, Caribbean. I got what that looks like.
I'm here at a pretty raunchy first night here and then with my husband. OK, with your dinner. OK, no. And I tell him this because there's no there's nothing. When you're just in love with yourself, you come with all of you without explanation, you know? And so that was a really nice actually on the beach introduction to Dominican Republic with my home girl that I bought Brod's. And the second day I actually met my husband and we've been to go, wow, yeah.
And I told him I was like, are you sure you want to do this? Because I just had this fantasy as like last night, if you're like, I still have come inside of me. I mean, no, you know, oh, my God, that story. I have never told it like it was like it had happened before me. I mean, that doesn't matter.
And that's and that's one thing. Shout out to my husband. He is one of the most secure men that loves every part of him without apology. And that's the only reason why we were. So I literally told him that. And I will granted, he did give me that look that he still gives me what I bring home stories you just like bitch who made you who?
Because, you know, the American is pretty chill. So he's just like you did what? Oh, yeah. I love that you like me, this guy. And tell him about the night before. He's like you showered or have you I mean, like what is the logistics? What are the logistics. Are you have you been in the ocean? Have you cleansed a little or am I just coming in. Right. I mean have you did a ceremony so you know, because, you know, I do ceremonies at different levels and he's just like, OK, like you said, that's previous not post.
And so that happened. We now fast for both of my children were born here. The three are more loose and Kozmic King on February 4th and so on.
Oh, my God. That's my I think we talk about that's my when I my dog I was telling you that just passed. That's the day I got him his birthday, February 4th. That's like a special day for me. Two major moves are happening on February four. OK, maybe February. Yeah. Yes. I love that you said that your husband allows you allows where. But you know, he lets you thrive, I guess because he loves himself.
And I think, you know, if you start with a person that likes himself that's confident that they can allow their partner to really thrive in the world, too. I love that.
And, you know, since I got to check it on you, it's not even allowed because, you know, when you were boss ass motherfucker, you have to kind of go about your life. You do it every day. And I was like, that's a better word. What can I. You know, I would say I would say he supports because no one allows you to do anything, you do what you want to do. I was searching for a better word.
Thank you. Support and women need to hear that. Anybody allow you to do a god damn right. My husband lets me know I don't ever want. And just a little bit to back up. You are from are you from Minneapolis or Minneapolis? Because we just want to. And you've lived here. You've lived all over before. You have like I'm I got I got distracted by the of the raunchy story of my interest. The Dominican Republic.
Yes. So I'm from Minnesota. Minneapolis, lived in Chicago, went to school with DePaul and Chicago. I lived in Detroit, did a year. I lived in New York for about maybe four years. I lived in L.A., lived in Atlanta. Wow.
I from early, I've always been on my purpose. So it was just kind of like I felt like a veteran in the game. You know, I knew what I was doing for really early. I had the ability and the gift of movement of people into their highest versions. And so that came in the form of I was a motivational speaker for a while. I created my own curriculum for black and brown children, letting them know about knowledge of self.
And over and over 50 schools in Minneapolis and St. Paul. We did contract afterward. I was huge with providing young people a space to realize that they weren't broken before they became broken adults. And, you know, we have the world that we have today. So I've always been in that and I've been blessed. I've been to a lot of countries doing the work that I do. I work with a lot of organizations, you know, and then there was a point.
Where he spoke, they just what I try to bring it to you live. I got to give it so you how I'd be really surprised me when I did just I think it's going to get a little vibe. And then you're just like Putty spoke to me. She was like I was helping children in the inner city. And then my policy said, no, we are going to we're going to the door. Yes. And we'll end it.
Is it but what she did say when she said, you know, because I you always think, you know, what you want to do. And when you surrender to the fact that you are actually bigger than the idea that you can try for yourself or society and your parents and fight for yourself, you start glowing up and expanding who you are. Right. Not just your title, not just what you do, what you like. We are bigger than that.
Right. And so that was my comfort zone. I go on a stage in front of a hundred thousand people, didn't matter to young people. That was like becoming normal. Right. And he said, how you doing? A good job, you know? And she was like, leave all of the major contract with the district right now and create spaces for women to heal and to elevate. And I was like, how did you learn of those words?
Who taught you this elevate?
Would you learn to girl?
But, you know, I remember I had it I it's now been deleted. What I put the first event that I spelled out in like two days by the first poetry and then I did in twenty nineteen overnight, the old and new I remember like yesterday being like will they buy into this. Will my people buy into investment in themselves, you know, when it's a higher ticket price than just say getting a blunt or some, you know, some liquor or some free penis, you know, like well they will they actually invest to come across the border and to connect in the nature of themselves.
Right. And so did that.
All twenty nineteen. We know what happened 20, 20 different time. And that's when my online communities were often sickly and in authenticity and integrity are very important to me. I don't touch it by also creating those online communities for women who are ready to do the work to heal. Right.
So what I do is really cosmic and it is in its essence, providing the space that women are comfortable enough to be themselves as themselves and to do the healing on themselves from the past because it doesn't go anywhere. It is. It's still there unless we deal with it. So it's a beautiful subject to create a space where not as black and brown women and any woman that is willing to do the work, to heal the trauma, to heal, to to change the narratives and to elevate themselves to the power of themselves.
That's what we do that now. I have three retreats for this year. They're all sold out as well.
I have the cosmic orgasm coming up, which when I tell ya I like my pussy, if I throbbing up robbing the driving rabbit, we want to give people a little taste of your pussy.
I want to man.
OK, and what you teach women in these seminars, obviously, you don't want to give everything away because you want people to come by. And we want to talk to you about today about how to get better and talk to their body and healing and have amazing orgasms with a partner and with yourself, because both of those things are super important. I just have to say, I didn't even say this laptop. I was introduced to you through Kelly Knight, who was a former guest of ours, modernistic.
And we had her on just a few months back. And she just messaged me and she said, I think I have this woman. That would be a great guest for you. I just did this workshop and I've been turned on for twenty four hours. Like she was like, I can feel this like in my body. And I was like, say no more fam. So who she is. Yeah. You know, so the important thing about talking about orgasm and orgasm being and raising their vibration and just feeling really good, that's the point of an orgasm.
Right. The physical part of it is only a part of it. Right. So what I really focus on, you know, it's nice. It just gets worse than that, orgasms or whatever you do. But there are levels to that. There are levels to that. And so what I always like to bring to women is if you want the highest level of orgasm, not just in your body and your mind and your spirit and your emotions, that shit is why Kelly was physically buzzing when she left the workshop.
Because it's not just about your pussy, right? You have a body that has been with you your entire life that also has energy that needs to be released. Energy and stuff, right? So I always give the example, you know, and this might seem disconnected, but it's all connected. When I was seven, I was sexually abused until I worked through that energy. Every single orgasm and partner only reached a cab because I had not addressed that trauma.
Right. So when I addressed the trauma, which took some years, it takes some time. When I went back to the sexual portion of it, after having to deal with the spiritual portion of the energetic portion, I was finally able to enjoy sex. And I'm a sex goddess in this motherfucker. Right. But for a long time, while I was feeling it kind of got to this point, we're just orgasms weren't hitting anymore. And I was like, is there something wrong with the pussy?
Is there's something wrong with the partner? They're beautiful. I love how the vibe is incredible. But I was hitting this part and that's why I always just kind of work with women to say, really, when it comes to orgasm, you have to honor yourself. You have to honor. So, for example, I work with women all the time that have low self-esteem. They put online, they have low self-esteem. I work with women that have lots of trauma that has manifested into physical form in their body.
That's also present while you're busting in that right. Also looking at who are you even interfacing with, you know, because that's what that the universe was like. You can't keep letting kookier away, right? Come in. You you know, and I was like, why? And then I was wondering why. I would just be angry. All of a sudden I have traits that were not me. It's because what was allowing inside of me right here.
So we're talking about orgasming. We have to get to this, not just this simple topic. And so I'm not kind of prepared for or possibly principles to share with you all. It's a day of oil. I can't wait where you go. You said, girl, I'm right this time.
I've never I think that so many women I mean, don't know how to everybody has a different masturbation story. They don't have to touch themselves. They don't have to touch themselves. But you didn't even think about all the other emotional things that come before you even teach yourself how to do that. And I think you just want to honor what you say. I'm very moved by it, not I, you know, but as I get your get your notebooks out.
Yeah. And replay this because honestly, a lot of times as women, we internalize that it's always, you know, we're just like I'm broke. And it's and it's really about like looking at the fact that you're not just a body.
You know, your experience is so great that low self-esteem you had your entire life is not going to go away because you found the love of your life. You know what I'm saying? It all takes work and we laugh ourselves. Most women, girl, to keep it honest, I don't care how much sex they've had, how many how many great masturbation times they've had, how many toys they've bought, they haven't really experienced. True, as I can guarantee, that just because of the work that I do with it.
I mean, women are living, you know, and it's really about like getting all of that in alignment so you can really send yourself to another realm, to masturbation or to intercourse or all three. And one night I had to find out how much it meant to be that. Right. You know, right before you go. And this is always what I said to my woman, because some of them are like, I can't orgasm with my partner or they kind of reach that like no place where you might orgasm, but it's just not hitting the same.
And I always just let them know. Usually it's also one of these I'll have to do with you first these last year.
Well, yes, OK, well, we can't wait to hear them. And we hate to leave our audience on the cliffhanger, but we just have to run through a couple of our partners so we don't have to interrupt any of these principles that you're in to share with us. So I am telling you guys about Daily Harvest. You guys know we're obsessed with really something else you can do for your body. And they deliver delicious food, all built on organic fruits and vegetables right to your door.
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I'm so sorry. Anyway, you go to their website, you take a haircut quiz, specifically talking about what your hair goals are. Do you want to lengthen you want a volume, you you want to control oil and then they start to formulate a formula for you. Then you pick the color you want. I choose pink and then you choose the scent that you want. I chose Rose and you choose what the bottle says. My entire bathroom is just like tricked out with a function of Raina Pink everything.
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I think it's funny because you love the hair mask and I love the Sarum like we both know the shampoo conditioner but I just like on the Sarum that's my favorite like other products, the only thing I haven't bought yet. So every week on everything that they sell. OK guys, we are back into it. Cosmic. She is going to go through her four principles for how to have a cosmic orgasm. Let's get into it. The first one is honor your womb.
Honor your war when your vagina or when your mom is telling you about red flag, when she's trying to speak to you about certain things that are in your life that you need to pay attention to or how she desires to be pleasured, that's also a big one. Speak for her by honoring and respecting what she says. So sometimes we always sacrifice what we desire, right? So we really want slow in the man's build up and we just allow our partners to just intercourse with us however they want, because we are you know, we love to nourish and serve.
And what I saw glass as what my most times, you know, but when we honor her, if she wants to be eight out for three hours before ever allowing a mother to answer her door, listen to her, listen to her, because anyone that deserves to answer her will listen to her as well.
So honoring your will, just like you would honor and respect some big name. Who told you to do something? You are a big name. Your pussy is a big name. She's famous, right. She's wisdom inside of you. Honor her if she's not trying to have sex with someone, you know. So honoring her and creating space to respect what she says without being ashamed. Because as women we always feel like we never want to ruffle nobody's feathers, even if it's our truth.
And if you listen to this, your truth is, is enough.
You know, if you do want to try something or you don't want to try something or you want to experiment, anybody that really rocks, which you will be open to you honoring your truth. And if not, well, I mean, that's your decision.
If you want to give that person any type of fight, why do we honor what somebody else wants before we honor what we want? When I literally wonder why we're not satisfied, if you know what I'm saying, like, well, we wonder why we're not satisfied. And it's like because you let him climb on top of you and hump you at his pace until he was finished and then the experience was over. And it is. So listen, I want to please my partner.
I want to please the people I'm with. I want them to have great orgasms. It turns me on so much to turn somebody else on, which is why I love oral sex giving oral.
So why are we spending so much time making sure that, like he or she, whoever your partner in that sexual experience is, they get off one by four, ignoring how we can get off? Yeah. And some of us don't even honor ourselves in masturbation because we're so in a fucking loop of how masturbation needs to be on or yusof So, for example, if you're if you're pussy something, you bitch create the motherfucking scene. I don't want to be quickly robbed and then discarded like I was never there.
You know, maybe she wants some nice, you know, incense or some homemade candles or some tea before, you know, we're so programmed to think that we need to masturbate to one or to some stimulation that comes in a typical way. We we're not even really present with what we're asking for, you know. And so, like, this can obviously translate to our partners, but also translate to ourselves. Are you even pleasing yourself how you want to be?
Right. That's where it comes from, because anything outside of us is literally only a reflection of what we allow inside of us. Right.
So if you if your relationships are showing a pattern, it's because you're showing that pattern with yourself and that's why you attracted the relationship to show you externally.
Sister, look at you. It's not their asses, it's you that's attracting and creating space are their asses to do what they do. You understand that?
And that was I said it on our first episode of the year, that my goal for twenty twenty one was to fuck myself better before. Yes. Because you know what that does. Oh I remember, I remember how old I was but I remember the experience.
I'm getting excited right now. I think about like this. Bring me back.
You know, I remember I thought I was like something like I broke my pussy from like my sexual experiences. And I was like, I just don't feel it anymore. I was waiting for my partner to recognize me as a goddess, but I wasn't actually like recognizing myself. So it was like I had to wait for someone else to say or to otter's a mask as opposed to be doing. As I remember, I booked a really nice and expensive hotel room.
I got everything that I actually love, not for my partner, not what I'm taught as a woman.
So life you know what I'm saying? Not all of these cultural pressures. I got what I needed to feel and to feel like horny for myself, you know, and it was it required something that was hard as a business woman with what you had is always going to require me to study my brain and tapping into my brain. Reasoning with my body slowing down and even feeling the slightest touch, right, oiling my body after a nice bath or shower, right.
And allowing not just to rush through time and get onto the rubbing of the clitoris. Right. None of that. It was like honoring this man who's done a lot. His body's been through a lot. And I decided that was the first time that I started to turn myself on because no one had ever taught me that I needed to turn myself on. It was like, please, your man, please your woman, please your this your that.
It was never what do you want for you? And I remember when I orgasm, I remember just being like sprawled out and like I've never taken like I Scholastic's he's going to have that. But I could imagine something. I literally took about thirty minutes to fully come back into my body. It was a game changer.
Yeah, it was a game changer because I had to guide myself into that ecstasy to understand how to guide someone else into that with me. Sure. Absolutely.
It was that was monumental, but I didn't get that and so I was honoring her. So that's the first principle. Honor, your honor your vagina and respect what she's telling you.
I have a question for you. I just never actually either one of you just like your feedback, you know, because we hear we hear from a lot of women. I'll get DM's every once in a while and say, you know, I'm twenty five. I just had my first orgasm. You guys encouraged me to masturbate and I discovered masturbation really young, like I was married to when I was like thirteen and not for any weird reasons. I just whatever I got touched my body really.
But I'm curious why people are sort of afraid to to touch themselves. Because you're in my mind, I'm like, you're alone. No one's going to know about this. Right? There shouldn't be any shame. And it's a beautiful thing. It's like, why do you guys think it's so hard for people to do that, this thing when you're alone?
I think society has a lot to do with this cultural norms. I don't know about you, but like I would tell this outside of my circle. But I remember as I grew up, like Baptist, Christian, very strict conservative. We were in church like seven days a week.
And I remember being like, I love masturbating. Makes me feel so powerful. Why is this wrong in a forest? My ass was asking the pastor and he was just like, bitch, what are you doing? What are you doing, what are you, what are you?
And I'm like, I'm not a whole I'm not out here fighting. I'm just I'm getting this feels good. This feels natural. Yeah. Why am I being attacked? So a part of that was like cultural and religious for me, religious. And then I remember like I would like go to the library and I really like and that time I was like fourteen or fifteen and I would like print off like erotic writing, like erotic and writing, some of them all at five and would go in the bathroom stall in the library, which now looking back like girls.
But I didn't. And I would just read because I was a reader, I was an avid reader, I was super intellectual. So that was my way of like I could create scene by just reading, obviously. Right. And I would masturbate in the bathroom. I just feel so good. And I remember trying to talk to my mother about it and she it was like there was no sex, no sex, no exploration talk with her at all.
And so some of the times they're just not safe spaces where we can live. And that's how I love being a mother, because I can really raise children, then understand that that's part of life and that's abuse. Like it's like when you go to cycle, it's a beautiful part of like life and transition and exploration. And I think a lot of times we're just taught to fit into the conservative box that most people are given. And there's not that understanding of this is a beautiful form of exploring and expressing yourself.
So what we do is we try to refinance our and that's when the sexual weird shit comes out because we never had a free space and a free time and support from those people that we look up to as our incentives in our life to actually explore our bodies. It was always, at least for me, cover up. I'm a nudist. My breasts are always out. I really fancy my mother thinks that I have completely gone off on drugs, you know what I'm saying?
Just because that's so different from her reality. But for me, it was like in the black hole that I came from. We never had a conversation around sex, which makes it breaks my heart thinking about it. And if I would have tried it, it would have been something wrong with me. Right. So then might you keep it on the hush hush?
You know, that's probably what people think, too. Like even though you are alone, nobody knows what you're doing, the privacy, your own home. I think it's a matter of feeling like something's wrong with you, like you're a weirdo, like you're abnormal. And so it's a lot of it, I think is just knowing that it is that is just normalizing all of it. So it's podcast hours. It's what you do. And so I think it's just like you just don't want to feel like you're in your home doing something that's like, so fucking weird.
I don't care, but I think a lot of people, they don't want to feel like something's, quote unquote wrong with them, so it's almost like the second you hear it's the same with kinks, it's the same with anything that like outside the norm. So it's just a large part of it is just normalizing it. I think that so many people have probably heard us say stuff on our podcast in your community, something that you do, whether it's with a partner or alone.
And they're like, wait, I can do that, too. And I'm not weird. And like a lot of it is, just knowing that it's whatever you're into is fine in a safe space for as long as you're not yourself and stuff like that. So I think that's part of it. That's just like, you know, you're maybe you're twenty two twenty five year old girl and you want to do this thing on your own. You're like, am I a freak?
And it's just like the more we can tell, you know, you're not a freak on or your pussy is so important in the spaces that I love you all as podcast because you are being so open and you're a true inspiration and not for others that I've never seen. Women that look like them seem all that talk like that. I've seen women that have the same experience that were open about it. Still in twenty, twenty one, we're finding that those spaces are rare.
I find in between like I do this for a living. The majority of women with almost a ninety five percent have not even experienced their true self, you know. And so when they come into these spaces where it's open and it's not pressure to be anything other than what you choose to be, that's a freedom that takes getting used to because most of us weren't raised with that freedom.
Right. Most of us were raised. Whereas like this is what you need to be. This is what's acceptable. This is what you know. And and as we're finding a sexuality is a personal journey, no one can tell you what's appropriate for you other than you. And that's also a reminder that we need to show women is that like no one can really tell you how to honor yourself. That's your responsibility. Yeah.
And anybody that's going to judge you for this stuff. But I love that you're normalizing these conversations. And we are. I didn't realize how, I guess, hush hush so much. This was because I was raised by a mother that was a therapist, Jewish in the Northeast. My mom, Bobby, your body yourself. When I was like ten, my mom was like explorers. See what's happening to your body. I didn't realize how many people were so shamed for wanting to try things.
Do you think something somebody even said something to me recently. I was talking to a man about some sexual things I wanted to do, and he said, I'm from the south. We don't talk, we don't talk about these things.
And I was like, well, then fuck you.
I'm sorry for you that you're so repressed when you honor yourself, you realize that everybody ain't or you like that. Part of it was like, we don't talk about these things. That is a beautiful sign from the universe. Just being like this is not worth putting more energy into because not even on the same page. And that's OK, because why would you even want to be with someone that can't even add to the conversation that is even afraid to have the conversation, you know?
So that's a blessing. Move along. I'm sure he'll find another drive pussy. Somebody one day, they're all over the place, you know, and you can go ahead and get your little you man on the way. You found me. So, yes, honoring yourself can never go wrong because you don't ever lose anybody. I have had acquired that left the husband after twenty five years of marriage, that she was never satisfied because she wasn't honoring herself.
She was staying in the marriage because you're supposed to stay married and she was never sexually satisfied. But when she did well, whatever.
She literally got to a space where you're able to get out of it long enough to see that you haven't been honoring yourself and realize that any one that leaves after you honor yourself or that separates themself for you, you honor yourself, is not supposed to be with you in this part of your journey. And that is OK, great. Well, first principle.
We need to honor your pussy. Honor your womb.
Let's go on to the second farm, her farm, her.
Let me ask you to when is the last time that you spoke to your pussy? Like verbally. How loud? Never lie. Great job. Yeah. Like you're killing it. Yeah, I think I don't know that I like I had an orgasm like last night. It was great. I feel like I'm to manifest when I'm climaxing. And so that was great. But I didn't, we didn't chat afterwards so why don't you like.
So I mean and it's kind of something that might sound weird to people almost like, you know, I have my flies, we have a beer and we look at our vaginas together, that's all. So most people have never just stared at their vaginas before. But what I'm talking about, like farming her, like you would affirm yourself, you know, you're getting over low self-esteem or depression. You're going to use affirmations. Affirmations are huge on the Internet in real life.
I am saying I am grounded. I am worthy, all of these things. So we have to put your hand on your heart and the other hand on your pussy, you know, and I always start off with like an honor to her. And I let her know that I create space for her and. I honor her uniqueness, I submit to her power, and I support that. For example, what I do every morning, if you like, literally, as we know, words create things and also words have the power to regulate our emotions.
If someone calls you fat, I'm guarantee that you're going to feel it either way. If someone calls you beautiful, I can guarantee your frequency will be higher. Right. The same thing works with our forces, right. We have to take time to slow down. All the all these principles require that we see what America needs. First world countries are telling us not to do with slowing down and realizing if we've never talked to our wombs, how does she feel?
How is he supposed to feel? You know, because when you talk to something, you create space for it. And so affirming her and it can literally just be like. I trust your truth, I trust your choosing not to touch her, because when you close your eyes, you can go down to her and you feel her. First of all, relax. Or for some of us women, we hold tension in our homes and in our stomachs, which is horrible.
Right. But just relax her, allow your ass cheeks to allow your ass cheeks to relax, allow your pussy muscles to fully relax when they're relaxed. You can let things in and speak light and it can even be one word, just peace. And I saw women physically that have trauma.
I think most women have some type of drama in there, Wolf. It could be a miscarriage. It could be one fucked up as narcissistic boyfriend that she'd have wasted too much time for it to be anything. Someone telling you that you're younger than you are, how when all you were doing was expressing yourself, your body remembers words and experiences. Right. And so sometimes if you're not used as a people, just do that exercise of just relaxing, you know, and then verbally speaking a word, peace and healing, joy and the magic of how energy works is it will work for you by creating that space on a second principle is really affirming her.
And I know that some people might listen to this and be like, that's weird. But you would affirm, for example, your husband, I'm assuming your partner, you're the girl. You would have found your children, you would affirm your girlfriends like, yes, girl, everything that you work for, you are about to harvest. Why can't we do that with everything outside of us and neglect our our main center? Right. So if anyone's listen to this right now, I can guarantee you that energy is going to move in and and doors are going to open up for yourself.
When you start doing that self here. I'm going to affirm not just my womb. I saw people, you know, anything that you're insecure about on your body in your life. I'm a farmer in love because no one is going to do that for you. But you nobody can heal. You find yourself. And so a farming is a huge principle because it takes the power of our lives as one man back into our hands. Too many women are feeling insecure, not good enough and skinny enough has that long enough is not fit because they don't affirm themselves on a consistent basis.
I love that I I've been wanting to just like tell me how I feel about this. I'm sure you like it. I'm sure you do this. I've been just wanting to get some like sunlight, my pussy. Like I think it was like Shailene Woodley said, like she glows because she like opens or gets like this. And I'm like, where can I do this? I got to find a place to just like spread eagle into the sun.
Just, yeah, I'm not I mean, I do it every day. It's nice to be nice.
Yeah. I like actually actually the whole complex. Yeah. I don't have anywhere to do it and I just was like I used to write like listening to you talk and I'm like I know I feel like she gets that vitamin D in her pussy. I just, I can feel the way I feel like I get it from the source. Right. And I mean and you know, I think it's so interesting because just like playing like I'm looking at all these beautiful palm trees and all of this like that's growing and even stuff out of concrete because it has access to the sun.
Yes. If this little graph is concrete, you can grow some manifestations out.
So, you know, because if life can survive there and there's something beautiful about self acceptance, then you can just surrender to a source like this. But. Right. I have suggested that it's not a ring light or it's not a bulb, but I can ring actually to be there.
That's the real deal. That's going to do some more damage than I would have. I want to feel like a breeze on my bed pussy. Like, I'm like, what do I do this? I think next time I go to my parents, I'm just going to. You can't do it on the beach. I'm not in Miami. You could have you out of your pants when I'm around my dad. I know. I mean, I'm going to go.
My parents want a big farm, so I'm just going to go out my space and, like, bring it in as best. It's best to do it like as a ceremony yourself. And I know most of us don't even know what that looks like because we don't we're just trying to make it, you know, but even like every time I do it, I do it alone with my husband or my partners or whoever I'm with, like, don't disturb me as if I was meditating in my alter.
This is not like it's not like a fun thing. It's like I am like how you charge crystals. I'm charging my way.
Oh, OK. All right. What do you have in principle three that you can.
Handsworth, I do as you and it kind of it kind of seems I was going to talk in Spanish follows from honoring her and it's just listening, listening when she's tired and she needs to rest, listening when she's anxious or apprehensive. Listening when she's insecure. As we received messages through our embassy all the time, we we as women, we are the highly intuitive, but we don't listen to my intuition. And so that always baffles me because we don't need to hire all these girls to tell you what you already know.
If you tap into your intuition and you can only tap into something when you listen, it's almost like, you know, like we're younger. We never listen to our parents. But they were right. Right.
It's kind of like really realizing that, like, if you create space, she will speak even if you've been, like, silencing her for years or ignoring her or just making her pretty because that's what you're supposed to do, whatever that looks like, those pressures.
But when you really listen to something, you create a respect and a relationship. You know, it's like in a relationship with someone. If your man or your woman doesn't listen to you, it's always going to be a recurring problem because communication is important in any relationship. And so if you are in a space where I'm always telling her who to be and not listening to the solution to your issue is going to come from your. Well, that's our energy sources.
We are multipliers. We are highly intuitive. Some of us, one with our impacts. That comes from the root chakra. That comes from within you, so principle three is just listening to her, you know, I do this meditation where I might put on some frequency or some nature sound or just go outside. I sit with my legs like this life. When you're going to the side and your feet are together and you're perceived as open. And I just put my hand on top of the other hand on my heart and I just listen because that it takes humility to listen like we don't know everything consciously, you know?
So I listen to her. She's always sometimes she brings up people that she's like, let's check him out some more, you know, do a little background check on him. Or sometimes she's like, text a friend. I always I always listen to that friend is always going through something. Right. And sometimes she tells me, take that trip back and the flight, it's cheaper and I get some free shit with whatever it looks like. Right. But like it's a constant conversation.
And that's what listening does, is it opens up reciprocal conversation. So listen to her, listen to her. And for people that are like, you know, like, what do you mean, listen, my pussy, this is like a little too woo woo for me. First of all, it's not it's listening. It's not your body. And we always say trust your gut. And it's the that's that's the same thing. It's trust your gut is the same thing is listening to your womb really.
It's just kind of like feeling what's going on, your body, listening to your body. And as women our womb is like and our vagina is like the central of our body, like that's where it's coming from. There's a reason why people say, trust your gut, you know what I mean? And no one thinks that's crazy. So it's ultimately the same principle. And it's like your it's when you ignore it and you don't sit down and take some time with yourself and listen to your to what your body's doing, that that's when things go wrong.
And I always tell people I mean, and I don't I still don't see how people would think this is kind of like Google in twenty twenty one when we don't know.
But I know a lot of I know a lot of people are having encountered before. Right. And my thing is like reconnection to yourself happens your privacy. So this is like top top, top priority stuff.
And because, you know, a lot of us are, you know, twenty, twenty really made people sit with them. So, you know, basically when we were in quarantine and you had to be with what you've been building or not been building, it's right in front of you because you're in the house with them. You know, you don't you don't have anywhere to go. And that should have been like I think I think a lot of people are awakening, particularly women, into their own powers because of the pandemic has forced us to slow down.
It's forced us to be into contact with our families and our spouses and our lovers. And they've really seen what we have going on outside of ourselves and within ourselves. I know my clients has spiked through the roof because they're like, bitch, I do not like what I'm seeing or like, what do I do with it now? But I can't go out to the club, travel, distract myself, go do anything that's not be with myself now that I saw quarantining that like women in particular were starting to wake up to their reality and they may have not known what to do with it.
As I always tell people that I've never heard these things before. That's on purpose because when when a woman figures out who she is, it's a rap that gave me chills like that.
It's true. And there was this jeez, this seemed like years ago. I don't care. But it was a quote. I mean, I say a meme, but it was like a tweet or a quote. And it was something like who you're becoming will cost you thing like it'll cost you things. It doesn't matter. Like it will all be worth it. And that's insane. Like, you know, and relationships. But it will cost you.
It will cost you and but it will be worth it in the end. Like figure out who you really are. Yeah. It will cost you the narratives that you've been telling yourself. I don't care if successful people in one area, but I mean, there's no, like, ultimate success. We are put here in a good things. We've. All right. So even like myself, I do this for a living. Well, I'm finding out like a bitch is infinite fitness.
Sure. Where this is going to go. But up and away, you know, I have to do this shit, listen to your pussy and check in and do the shit you want to do and you know it. Just do the shit you don't want to do. Yes.
And watch how your life goes. Watch how you frequency and and watch how your relationships. I was always on my roof that are like, well, you know, he doesn't do this and he doesn't get it. And there's there are there are men and women out there that do get it now. Yes. It's small in the presence of the masses. But like, literally when you up your standards on yourself, you hold that expectation for anyone to come by and anyone that's currently been in it, they either have a choice to to rock with it themselves or to be phased out.
Either way, that's not on you. Your only responsibility is making sure that you are authentic. To your right, and when we do this, we create an environment where other people can get that light to be authentic, that therefore it works like a ripple effect our children can actually see. And I love having children around me because I know that it's rare for them to see them and to be a and the fact that they're perfectly designed, all they have to do is blow up in their design at my design.
Not the fathers, not society. We are perfectly designed. I mean, just bask in that, you know, and when we start to really, like, activate our our we'll realize that all the dead weight will remove itself, making way for things that are of our of our design. And we attract what we are. Yeah. It's not so hard for you if somebody wants to tell you that they won't masturbate in front of you because they're from the south and it's just not done your way out the door.
I will find somebody to masturbate in front of me and then we'll do it.
Girl, when you want to take somebody, I don't care if you want to work. Trip, baby. Give me the video. I love. I love watching men. I love watching men and women pleasure themselves. So again, I wish you well. Me and my wife will just be over here live in our tree house guests.
And, you know, and the cool thing about doing it, do it because sometimes we can, like, tell ourselves this narrative of if I show up for myself, no one's going to accept me as such a small space to live in. Because although the the masses my misunderstanding, there are still a lot of people that do and that accept them and have the capacity for what you desire. But if you always tell yourself that narrative of, well, I can't leave him because well, there's no one is really going to be you're already self prophesy and meditation completely before you even make a move.
You're making yourself stagnant before you even take a step because you're saying me living in my truth. Well, who's going to accept that?
You know, so when we look at this, when we when we look at the right person for you, maybe the right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What do you find them. Yeah. Like I mean, and connectedness to the before I was with them, like I told you, and like every relationship tried to make me smaller than the big ass goddess that I am. And they didn't have the capacity when I left their asses. And I got to a point where before I was with all the narcissists and I took a year of putting him off and dating myself, because then I got to a point after I got out of life, fell in love like blinders.
They tried that I would rather be single and wait than ever sacrifice an authentic part of myself. And I remember when I told VASI that I would need to have the freedom like I came into this relationship with to do anything with anyone that I attract and to have his blessing and support. As one of my had partners, I was ready to leave my marriage. When I went into that conversation, I had already made that commitment. And even though because I love I love him to my core, I was I ever cried because I was like, he's not going to accept this.
He's going to be like, bitch, I went off the fucking rock. You are asking too much. But I made the decision myself, if this is for me. It's going to be my true self, and I've told him this is not a conversation where I'm asking for permission. This is a conversation where I'm letting you know my truth. And I hope that we can we can live it together. And like I was telling you, actually, it was it wasn't easy because he Dominican's are not open to polyamory in general, just like the states is typically not even more.
It's really, really weird because it's just a smaller, more simpler island. Right. And so sometimes people are always like, well, your husband is like you. He's open. He's this policy is the opposite of me. And it grew our love that he could have the capacity to support something that he was against.
One thing we talked about before when we chat about this was you gave him some time and space. You didn't come to him and say, I want to be more open and whatever. I mean, also, you didn't have any like you just want to live your truth, whatever that meant. You didn't go to him and you weren't like, I want to have another husband in this. And you just were like, I want to be open and I want you to accept me for who I am.
But you told me that you just like he wasn't like, Yeah, girl do you. It took a while, took him like a week like you. I think that was a beautiful thing that you were like, I am going to do this, I want you to be supportive. And you gave him some time and were patient with him and he came around because he loves you and wants you to live your truth, too. Can we back up for one second just to like Luliang?
You guys talk a little bit before this?
I look, man, I'm be in the audience and you approach him because you said you were ready to, like, walk out of the marriage. Did you have, like, a bunch of different conversations where you tried to, like, move the goalpost a little bit or you just sort of formulating that you went to him and said, like, this is what I want, what I'm going to do? So, like, I had that look for anybody that's thinking like I want to maybe think about this well, the first time and I always move in truth.
So at one point, the first conversation we had, I was like, you know, what we'll do is lay in bed, bitch. I was like, I really feel to like be free and open to, like, you know, massage late, make it without notice. He knows that. So I didn't ask for the sexual piece of it, so I didn't because it wasn't coming up. So I didn't like this is all about this is also why I think that it worked, because it was it was just when it came off is when they came out.
Right. And that's love is when you don't have to, like, prepare for the right point. Yeah. Yeah. OK, point one line for me. You're not we don't know how to make those so that. No, not at all. Like Ground Zero from the heart. Yeah. Yeah. And and so it was just like kissing. They, you know, fun stuff that came up and he's like, well you know, he asked some questions.
I remember I even went over my birth chart with them because instead said my birth chart is impossible for you to be polyamorous because of the type of light you are. It literally said that.
And I was like, see, the universe says, I'm not making this up. And you just look at the birth chart. You know what I'm saying is the Americans don't really get into all of that. You know, wait, it said it's impossible for you to be monogamous. You mean, like you said, polyamorous. And I wanted to clarify. Yeah. Yeah. So it's impossible to just be with one baby. I remember being like, yo, this is probably not going to go well.
And then we had that conversation. And if he did say no and then we went deeper, that's why I love him, because we don't have to just like, stop the anger or the triggers. We can go deeper and go to the room together. And then he was really silent and he was like. Looks like. Yeah, and I could tell that you'd want to, but I could also tell that he knew this was my truth and I wasn't trying to piss him off.
I wasn't trying to make a dramatic situation out of our marriage. I wasn't trying to embarrass him. And I had to also realize that what I'm referring reaffirmed him. I had to let him know me opening up. This doesn't mean that my love for you changes at all.
If anything, I rock with you for my entire life because I've never had a space to be love how I love myself, you know what I'm saying? Ever. And so after he and his idea from someone that's never seen Ali AMREF, any motherfucking thing is like that means that there's something wrong with me or you're going to give more attention or you're going to forget or I'm compromising my spot. And when I let him know, like we're going beyond that type of conversation, nobody is compromise.
They are for me, I'm polyamorous the way where I'm building the fucking empire, you understand? So like one person is not enough for me. What he feels is there's only what he fulfills easily. Only future man I've ever met that never lives. That is exactly who know. That's great. But other areas he will never be able to feel like it all. No one can fulfill all of you. And that's just selfish to put that on to somebody that's just starting for me.
It's like starting off with an unrealistic expectation that your partner is going to be your everything that's that concept to me is strange and it puts too much pressure on people, which causes arguments and fights because your expectations weren't even realistic. I can't be everything to have right. I'm like, don't look for me for another. I was shit because I'm not doing I'm a tell you right now, you know, stuff. Oh yeah. Yeah. Like look internally you can't do that for another person.
I don't want to be too because that's not fair to me to be like you're my friend, your porn star and everything else to you, you the same day.
Now like I'm going I've tried you girl. I tried to but you know why you still you know. But I had to switch my mentality, you know, really becoming a woman. And if we come back stronger because he has his space or his actions, his dreams, I have my passions, my dreams and I have my people for that. You know, we have the spaces that we come together really strongly and we support each other. And that's the spark and the love that I have for him.
Like I said, he probably is the freedom to be polyamorous, you know, is in the form of building is a type of love that I can't even describe. I can't it's just like it's the ultimate love. That's how you when you're in love and you can accomplish anything, that's the type of love we have now. He's seen all of my gifts. There's nothing that I hide from him. There's nothing that he hides from me. There's no need.
Why would you. So we're so glad that he finally agreed. And you guys are like living your truth that we still have one of our principle. This one is this one. This one. You can only get two when you do the first three. And it's bad. It's bad. And the essence of your. OK, how do we do that, so let's do it right now is the word no, let's make a generic of actually have options like making our policy.
You see this whole idea that, you know, this is going to take a turn that people are going down on, Ashleigh.
Now, I'm sure you know, I'm sure you know. Well, OK, so we're going to bars. OK, I want you all, if you can, to put the knife down. I want you to just get into a very comfortable, relaxed position and just ground yourself in that position and take a deep breath in through your nose, filling it into your nostrils, into your system, and then visualizing that breath going down to your roots, your pelvis, your own space.
I want you to take another deep breath into your nose, then letting that air out verbally as you're letting that out. I want you to just relax your shoulders, relax your neck, relax your chest, relax your stomach, relax your legs, relax your toes, taking another deep breath in your nose.
But I want you to imagine your foundation opening to light, taking a deep breath and letting that full breath out, breathing as you visualize that light in between you. From your womb space and moving freely up to your Sacred Heart throat or die Crown chakras, energy point and allowing them to feel their entire being. With energy. With awareness. As you visualize this life just taking over your entire body. I want you to visualize what freedom looks like being your free, complete self feels like.
Breathe that in, fill up with that. At that breath out. I want you to put both of your hands on your heart, and I want you to breathe into the heart of the heart energy space and open it up with abundance and light.
And then say these beautiful, simple words of affirmation. I am open to receiving the light and abundance that is here for me. I am love. Highest frequency. I am light. I accept parts of me. I welcome in freedom taking a deep breath in through your nose. And in your stomach, relax and before. Opening your eyes. Allowing the charged stealing. The slowdown we're feeling to be in your essence or embarrass your pussycat powers. We did it.
We did it. Thank you for guiding us through it. And I hope somebody did this at their desk. Yeah. On Monday morning. I hope that they just like, let this happen to their bodies before work or at work and basking in just like that again.
It's almost like the point is to sit back and realize the magic that has been moving in your life. You've gotten opportunities that only work for you that's beautiful. Know you've got things that happen in your journey where you might have been to my place if it was for you, you know, and so to basketball, that part of your job is like honoring and not just being like that, but like honoring, like I said, because I'm like I'm a survivor of a lot of things.
And sometimes the old thinking can really be just like, damn, I thought I wasn't going to survive that. And I lived through it, you know, and basking in the journey because every part of our journeys literally were called by us, you know. So it's kind of like honoring the blueprint and really taking time to just slow down and not judge and just be those are just some of the principles that we really not even just talk about. Everything that we do is we do these activities and some ceremonies that help you to honor yourself.
Because the problem is, is that most of us have ever seen of a robot, you know, like we don't really have stuffier other than here. And that's that's not so clear that that's is taking care of itself. Right. So, like most of us don't have five or meditating time or time because we don't think that we deserve it or we might not even see the value that, you know. So I love it because we do what I do is I really show women how to honor their lives.
Well, thank you so much. This was so wonderful talking about all this with you. We want you to tell everybody where they can find you, how they can follow you, take your courses, all the things I thank you for simply my website.
I am cosmic vibes, dot com, and I'm sure you all the time. But also they don't have to. Absolutely question is literally how it is. My Instagram is awesome. I am cosmic vibes and those are the two faces. So of course the Instagram will have the link of my bio and all of that. But anything that I offer will only be on those two platforms just to keep it simple. OK, I don't wanna talk about the community.
So we have we have the cosmic orgasm, but that's a specialty three month intensive for any woman that wants to return to have our sensuality. And that's really exciting because that's the work I've been prepared to do. And it really is. It's not for everyone. You can start as a beginner, but it's not for everyone. You really, if you are interested in that, shouldn't have made a decision to choose you and support it on yourself and be ready for what that looks like.
So if you're not ready for that, as you have another option, and that is our weekly communities, which are literally founded in sisterhood, women from around the world literally take this time once a week to come together for our cosmic community, which is Sundays at 9:00 p.m. Eastern, and our cosmic mamas, which is for any women that desires to be pregnant as currently pregnant or that already has children, it's kind of like our weekly self care, and that is for the woman that wants to start learning about these spaces.
But is it ready to be attached to her fiancee, the five of us? You know, but it's like an entry level subscription. We have trials, so you can really try it out for a month. The cosmic community is, I think, twenty two bucks a month. The other one is like thirty three bucks, super affordable. And what is doing to be very I'm very blunt. I don't sell anything is teaching you to invest in yourself, because not only is it the investment of a little bit of cash, you're taking a time weekly to gather with your sisters and to heal through authentic sisterhood, which is a whole nother conversation.
And two, you're training yourself. You deserve to be showed up for. Right. And so in those and those weekly gatherings, we have special guest. We kind of go over some of the base feeling more of like releasing manifestation things of that nature, just the kind of ease people into these these environments. And so all of those can be found on the website as well as by Instagram. So I am blessed with my blessings to exchange energy with you, too, as well.
And it's been a blessing to you. So wonderful. I'm so glad we found you, Kelly. Let's find you and then our audience has found you. Yes, absolutely, Cessna's. Well, thank you, Kozmic. We will talk to you soon. All right. Be well. Be well.
And you guys know where to find us girls. Got your podcast. Dotcom at Girl's got a podcast on Instagram. Ash has Ranaghat Greenberg and Instagram girls and our score. Got it on Twitter and YouTube. Dotcom slash girl's got to eat. And that's all for us. We'll see you next week. All right, guys, have a good week. I.