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We'll kick off this week's up with the fact that actually we recorded this yesterday and when we got to the end, no, let anybody tell us what happened and I think anyone is going to tell us she's not on the porch. I want to I want her more on the pod while she can't be.

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So that's a emotionally actually after what she did yesterday. Yeah, so am I. So basically, we recorded the whole pod as usual.

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We were on flames form. We literally came off the pod going.

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I mean, we are literally just going. I would say we are going to liquid gold and then most some these.

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Whoa, whoa, whoa. M0 deleted the pod.

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So now we've got to do the whole thing again. And let's be honest, what is ever better the second time around?

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Well, let's be honest. If we're honest with ourselves, if we lost any pod, I'm happy it was yesterday's pod yesterday.

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All my troubles seemed so far away. I thought, oh, my God, did anyone hear? Did you hear me? They're they're here to stay. Did you hear how good I was? Really? Oh, my God. Yes. They say that, um, we're not here for singing. I love that song. KUNM that all here's to be.

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Hello, I'm Spencer Matthews.

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And I'm VOC Williams. And welcome to this week's POD. Let's see if anybody notices what we did that Spencer on campus over the last couple of days.

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It's the funniest thing that you can do to Spencer, right? It's called, um, Spencer.

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He it's like I said, hey, he's so angry with you.

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He's like, what's wrong with you? Why are you doing that? I'm like, I'm just calling you by your name.

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And I'm like, Hey, Spencer, he's like this because it's wrong.

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It's because I associate being called Spencer with with misbehaving, obviously, like nobody calls me Spencer.

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So, like, you know, it's always Spanish or Spanish or the Darling or one car or the, you know, love of my life or this great savior of the world, you know, whatever just just kind of obvious, obvious nicknames. It's never Spencer. She walked in yesterday because she gets up earlier than me. She gets up an hour earlier than me usually. And Vogue and Vogue walked in on Good Morning, Spencer.

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And I thought, fuck, you know, other than, uh, I love you.

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The first day I woke up in fear thinking, oh, I've forgotten to put the milk in the patient, I've left the lasagna out or well, I've done something. We did leave the lasagna.

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I know we we ate it anyway. We were friends for the fear in your face when I said the name Spencer. And then after I saw that, I was like, I'm going to keep doing this for a while, a little bit lower. Hated everyone calls we vogue because you can't really shorten Vogue but only Vogue value vogue.

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Only thing that annoys me about my name is like and people will mail me on Instagram and do it and they call me Vu's.

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It's like, dude, I just get it right. How could he not see.

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And if someone like I ask your name is so ridiculous that it's easy to remember, it's so ridiculous. He can't say views.

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Well, the best thing is when our wedding album came back with Mr. and Mrs. Williams on it, I was literally just like, what is this stunning?

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Was this Scheidt stunning piece of artwork, no wedding in the bin.

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OK, sweetie, let's talk about our peak and pet of the week, OK? OK, my pick of the week. Right.

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You know, if this was yesterday, yesterday, 20.

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Come on. Not every song.

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If this was yesterday, it would have been that I got to shoot for my new tracksuit range at Lusi, which I'm currently wearing.

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This is the pink one.

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Um, but I've had such I say, do you think the this is the pink one was necessary. This one's the pink one.

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OK, it's just in case you're my business partner, Justin and I are completely colorblind. Yeah. So at least he knows that this is pink. OK, well he probably sees yellow.

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So it was a very exciting day. We shot first. We got great pictures. I'm delighted.

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But then today came along and I've had a very good day today. I've got so much in and I feel like I'm being a good mom, too, at the same time, because, you know, you feel like you can either have one or the other. Sometimes I feel like I'm working too much and I'm not spending enough time with the kids today. I've had a nice balance.

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OK, you're great. Now, I just don't get why you ever, ever would question that. You're a good mom, like you're the best mom. I know I'm a good mom, but you're always with the kids.

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Like we have the great fortune. And actually it's one of it's one of the pandemic's only kind of, you know, good points, I suppose, is that we get to spend far more time with our kids.

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But you're, like, obsessed with being with them all the time. And then when you spend, like, an hour away from them, you're like being a shit mom.

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It's like, well, no, no, I feel like I feel like if I'm if I'm in their vicinity, I need to be doing something with them. Can I have one go at singing yesterday?

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No, you've already had a girl, but it wasn't right here when I sang it. I was already gone yesterday.

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You guys a competition go.

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All my troubles seemed so far away. Oh.

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Oh my God. It's not that she yesterday I'm trying to put this northern accent.

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You forget all my troubles seemed so far away. Now I know they're really here too. So you only got one line. Oh I believe in yesterday suddenly. No, no.

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I'm quite keen to be a Beatle, says you, man. Right. We actually had this on a as a part of your mom. Right. As part of the podcast expenses like let's talk about how people like the Beatles when they're crap and the Beatles aren't crap. And I try to explain songs and he watches the joint film.

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Haven't even seen it. It's not. I know he thinks the Beatles are brilliant when you've already dissed them. Forget most people not allowed to change their minds now. Well, you had all of the everything was there in front of thousands of people stop and change. No, it wasn't. I've never sat down ever. You sing.

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Try to appreciate the Beatles. And actually I enjoyed his take on their song. I Singled You, singled the Beatles out.

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And he said, yeah, those guys are I don't like the way they sing their songs. I like the fresh acoustic versions. That is it.

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Jack Fucker can't remember. His name is the fresh acoustic version.

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Obviously he's not Phonebloks is he from back in the day or five. Broton Listen, you need he is a single guy with a guitar that I found all of his songs quite refreshing, obviously that the Beatles songs. But I enjoyed the film yesterday.

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Yes. This is basically spending I loves the Beatles of Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice. I still stand by like Yellow Submarine being a shit song, which is probably why they left out of the film.

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And compared to me spent. He hasn't seen the movie Beetlejuice. Yes, I have.

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You only watched it recently, but maybe you hadn't seen it before. Have you seen Death Becomes Her Night. Oh God. So many classic he's missing.

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You've missed loads of real and classics now. I've seen them all. There you have it. Like a one thing. The dick hunting. Obviously the dark was not classic.

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New proposal was not crap. You are judgmental when you haven't seen things. You're judgmental, just like I'm judgmental. Think the Beatles are shit having never listened to them. Yeah, because they're old. You're not old now.

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I'm not. Well I am a bit. I'm 32. It's not old. It's quite old. You'd be bummed out if I said it was really old. Because you're thirty five.

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I am thirty five. There was never any hope of me being able to like hide what age I was or I can never shave a couple of years off. You can change your face.

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Yeah. And shave your face. Mm. Well let's see when I get pregnant again. I like it when you first edition we'll be back, your face turns into little page which I like. It's worse than a page. It's the happiest I've ever seen.

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Some pictures of poor Harry Justino. I don't think he could plant a peach, you can't you can't play your face either, are you?

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Could you could you could twizzle the hairs that grow my face, in fact, and we'll get Buki, the barb around ocelots and give you a shave. What a shave. I'd really enjoy that.

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Oh, we haven't done the peak it. Well, I've done my peak.

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I don't really have a pet because I've had quite a nice week there. I know what my pick of the week is going this morning.

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I worked out with Bear Grylls, which was that was quite good, which is pretty epic, considering he obviously only works with incredible A listers.

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I thought to myself, call I've made it or I've snuck in the back door somehow, but I really enjoyed it. This morning, Benny's parents tell everybody I won the show, that I did a bag and must be like six years ago.

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Now they tell everyone that I will and they're so proud.

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He said he nearly put turfed you out on day two, though he didn't know because I won and I know you won, but he said that you were in bits when you arrive. Yes. And he said you had a long way to go, but you were easily the best developed kind of journey. In the end, he said that he thinks you're a legend and he loves us together. He likes us very much.

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There's something really cool. And Bear Grylls says, you're cool.

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You're like, OK, I want to say I had him on other podcast afterwards and he just like all he did was just shower me with, like, love and praise.

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I honestly, I was like I said to him, I was like, I've never I've never felt this complimented or good in my entire life.

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Was I was I feel I feel like I've just kind of become a different person because, you know, like, I have made it. So for me, I looked out the window and I was kind of almost hoping that it would be some dreary, cold, dark day made bright by Babaji.

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It's a lovely day. It's not a bad day. And he's been with his wife forever and he's mad about it. And he compared us to them.

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He said that he said that it's so wonderful to see such a genuine, like, bond of friendship in your marriage. He's like and he knows you and he knows me, obviously. And it's like he just thinks that where he's joining the long list of people who think we're great together.

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I was that nice. That was nice. Funny. So we're having our Valentine's Day dinner tonight because Theodore, as usual, let's be honest, a racket on Sunday. They will. Yeah. So we're going to we'll have another Valentine's lunch maybe on Sunday with the kids already planned it.

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Oh, really? Yeah, I know exactly what we're doing. Fettuccine. Yeah. There's this place. Right.

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I know this is so lazy. Right. But I love her. I don't like cooking or I don't like cleaning up after it. There's a restaurant across the water that does the nicest roast and then you have it like on the day of and then we'll eat on Monday too. It's great. Suddenly it's a gift that keeps on giving.

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OK, I'm singing. Oh sorry. Did you say your Pick of the week. What was your peak.

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Peak was being showered with love by Bagwell's. I'm a big fan of Pict again. Listen, do I need a pet. Oh I dislocated my my shoulder the other day and obviously didn't mention some hard as nails as kind of only just you don't mention it a few times actually.

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Ryoko And actually I've come to realize that sleeping on my right shoulder is, is my preferred position because I miss this so much. I've been sleeping on my left shoulder and I'm like, yeah, okay.

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I said my. So the lovely people are Gregs, Sanches over our first Gregs, and yesterday we lost our Arpad virginity, but in the last part we didn't we didn't lose our virginity.

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I'm the pod master now.

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We lost it, but we also lost the pod because Cosimo forgot to click record or deleted it, which is just all demo.

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I mean, are we recording today?

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Was it why are we reporting today? Yeah, it's it's definitely recording in my.

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It's three three. OK. OK was triple recording today but we did lose our Gregs virginity essay on Oh.

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Lemony Spanish one for the bacon sandwich. Yeah.

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Well that's so basic but I don't want a cheese and bean pasta.

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Well I had a cheese and been passed and there was sausages in it and it was didn't disappoint. It's exactly how you think it would be delicious. Exactly. But that's my point. It's like me, like going to China and giving someone kind of hynde's beans on toast and saying this is going to taste like beans on toast.

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And you go, yeah, all right. Anyway, it was delicious.

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And for Alexander, I also gave him a sausage roll and my little brother counts every calorie. He started doing that recently and he and a sausage roll, there's 355 calories us far less.

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And I thought that would be really a sausage roll. It's totally worth it because they're kind of long.

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It's like death in pastry. Oh, it's delicious.

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Anything. Anything. Sausages. Yummy. Yeah, she loves sausage. I love this lasagna. She loves sausage.

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And actually she's become somewhat affectionate in in the past few weeks. I thought you were pregnant again, to be honest. Are we moving on to pregnancy. Yeah, I suppose we have to fix.

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I was we were watching a film the other day or a clip of something.

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Oh, I thought I didn't know. That's why we were bringing it up. Oh sorry. Go on now.

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But like literally you cry all the time. So so like in this film they were getting their golden retriever. He looked just buggered by the way, so.

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Oh yeah. Exactly. So so things die. You need to understand that people die, dogs die, animals. Everything dies, everything dies.

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OK, fucking hell. Debbie Downer. Yeah.

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Well exactly why are you surprised when two old dog. I was sad about the dog. Why.

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You know what I think it is right. It's not real that I'm really putting it down either for a TV show I read IMNSHO when I miss my mom, I miss my sister.

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I miss my brother and I now well, my mom is in Spain, my brother and sister in Ireland. I really miss everyone. I really think that's why I'm so ready to cry at any minute, because I miss them so much. Cry?

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No, like a method actor then I.

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But the thing is, I can't tell if he's crying or laughing because she cries and because Alza and I are always so shocked at the content that she's crying.

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We, we both end up going like and just staring at her in complete disbelief. And then she, she kind of tries to laugh through it.

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So she's crying because it's like I can't tell what she's doing. You're crazy with it. You've done it every day for the last five days.

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I know. Well, listen in. And one thing we were watching, uh, Firefly Road, which I can't say is my idea of good fly lane. I said I can't as my idea of great television, but I love we were. You love it.

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Yeah. Yeah. We were watching that.

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I literally this little girl in it so my mom is a bitch or something. And then the woman she's talking to who obviously isn't about me said no, no, your mother is the kindest woman.

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And she was kind when she was 14 and nobody was kind when they were 14 and just goes, oh yeah, I don't know what I was.

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I was like, well what what is sad about that? I don't know.

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That one got me for no reason. I'll agree. That was a bit of an order. You may as well cry when you watch like a pan Persad.

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OK, Simon, I know we were bitching about Mo earlier about the Graig thing, but Gregs have actually sent us another package. No, they haven't. Oh, wow. You'll get it. What's in there? I don't think spending is going to lose his Gregs virginity again and again on the part of his wife.

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What's in there today? Unfortunately, there's no vacancy Sangers.

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And I thought things like those chicken and beans or is that sausage and being saucy, saucy taste that you're having.

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Hot, hot. If you spit on my carpet, my carpet.

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Go on. Tell me that's not good. Tell me that's not good. Delish, like it tastes like sausage means, you know, in an pastry. Look, he Surmont Chinois, there you go, there you go, pile divine for the man, he's not that into Gregs accounts of rootin in the bag. What can we try next?

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Can we do Tobi's. Let's get Tobey's carvery. Come on. I organized Gregs. Oh my God. That doesn't look right. What's in that? Not nice. Oh my God. Jesus.

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Saker chocolate. My goodness gracious.

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OK, get out of the bag. Stop eating things because it's just wasting eat. Finish it.

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No know what we are godey's after only Nardoni don't eat and half of each terrible waste. Theodores, I'm not for dinner, that's the chicken one that I had that says all good. OK. Like we don't need to eat everything in the bag. Will you organize a Tobey's Kaveri quite, quite well seasoned Ushi the Chicken one. What do you think has been voted as the most annoying habit in the world? I don't, I guess. It chewing with your mouth open.

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Yeah. Is it really? So why did you do it all the time? I don't give a shit all the time sometimes. Like, you'll be sitting.

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If you want to know why I did it, then why?

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Because boiling hot seat, that's the hottest thing I've ever put in my mouth. That's not true. Spending over a hot coffee like boiling hot coffee. And this is why I think he doesn't like the taste of it because he just drinks it like a shot.

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I dunno how to get spoiled his whole. Maybe it doesn't scold your esophagus, burns your belly.

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Well, I'll drink it and it'll go down my throat and I won't feel it. And then I'll feel the heat in my stomach. So, yeah, a nice feeling.

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But anyway, yeah, the most annoying habit in the world is eat with your mouth open. And I could be on one side of the kitchen and spending will be over sitting on the couch.

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And honestly, it's like he has just he doesn't close my one tiny bit. And when your mom used to be in England and she would come over, she would be so shocked and appalled by her hanging in jail. And guess what? There's a few things that matter less to me than you want to know. What else?

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Oh, God, that I hate when this one happens, when someone accidentally spits while talking to you. Oh, yeah. But there's nothing you can do.

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Oh, and, you know, when they get your face near, like, oh man, I only have to like I'm like, oh like it's burning into your cheek wherever it's hit.

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It's like, oh no they're not venomous pythons. I don't want anyone spit in my face burning into your face. Spetz. Another one was using your phone mid conversation. Oh folk, welcome that you like. So Vogues favorite thing to do is like if I have something legitimately important that I want to tell. OK, good luck. She has the attention span of a newt. It's like impossible.

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I would not be able to get Vogue to sit down and have a conversation with me about something for five minutes. No way.

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We'll stop talking absolute garbage. You can't. I literally I was trying to run you through something the other day and she stood up and left the room.

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Well, we tried and I was just like, hey, I was like, hey, I'm in the middle of a fucking sentence, like literally. And then she comes back, she's like, well, I've got shit to do. I'm like, What?

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Oh, no, because when you've a terrible habit of repeating yourself. So that was something you'd already told me and he had to run through it again. I just felt like, you know, what did I have to do?

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So a little less like, well, you know, is it because you're wearing a matching tracksuit that you're going down dude and man today? Dude, man, I ain't going.

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I didn't say, yeah, you did. You said, hey, man, I said, you're mine now. You didn't. You said your man earlier when you were trying to pretend that you're still Irish. And then and then here you said you said, hey, man, I don't want to do that or something. Okay.

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The other thing I should say again is a fucking conversation. Moving on something else. We haven't finished what we're talking about. Well, I finished. Okay. I know the thing is not replacing the toilet roll. That's a bit annoying, to be honest. We've got hundreds of liberals here now, but like leaving the empty cardboard on. I never do that. No, you don't do that actually, either. Now, which is kind of surprising.

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I don't spit acid at people either.

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Just in passing. I do chew it my mouth open if something's too hot to handle.

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Another thing that's kind of been I don't know, it's a sticking point in our relationship now.

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Well, it certainly is for me. We were only moments when he kissed me and I was literally like, oh, what the hell is that?

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Such a weirdo creepy kiss he gave me. I was like, what's wrong with you? It wasn't a weirdo, creepy.

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And that he gave me another kiss. And I was like, What are you doing? Weird. Where are you kissing me? And it turns out his little mustache is running. That he has gone on is makes him the weirdest kisser ever. It's not a weird little mustache.

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It's a high end gentleman's mustache, mustache. Everyone wants me to to tell you to stop saying mustache.

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But I've said this, that I'm not a mustache. I am choosing my battles with mustache.

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Everybody loves mustache, my mustache, my mustache. Everybody loves a mustache. Yeah.

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So basically, I'm not going to be correcting the way he says mustache, mustache, mustache, mustache. It's not it's not car. It's a it's a mustache. No mustache, not a mustache.

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And it's not a suit. It's a suit. I like to say suit sometimes because actually it is the proper way to set.

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OK, so I'm going to tell you something that I read in the news this week that I think you're going to love, right? Elon Musk, how much you love him?

[00:21:32]

I do like Elon Elon Musk. That's a funny name. Elon Musk. Well, I guess it is, but it doesn't really matter, Elon. Anyway, Elon Musk plans to get humans to Mars in the next five years.

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I want to go. I'm not going.

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When you realize it'll take like 14 years to get there and in 14 years to come back. Well, you're not saying that? Well, no, obviously I say I would like to. I don't know those details, but I do take an enormously long time to go. I do think it would be like a trip down to Oxford.

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No, he actually that's not what I was thinking. It was he was messed up by writing that. And that might be to go to Mars. But supposedly by next summer, he thinks that humans will be able to buy tickets to go to the space station. Such travel eight, go to the space station and go back. So like how long that there are many millions of pounds per ticket? Justino So I think it's between five and 15 million dollars a ticket currently, something like that.

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So you won't get too many people doing it. I wouldn't even go if I was gifted a ticket. I definitely would go to the space station, but amazing.

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So anyway, to Mars is incredibly far away. You do know that they do you want to know some spaceman facts? Yes, I would. I thought that you'd be interested in this. Right to Speak was on radio last week.

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He was on harp breakfast. So that's how I know this has happened.

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And he said, right.

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The space suit that he wears costs 12 million pounds.

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Your standard got four of them, 12 million on each part has to be individually placed on him. And the suit comes in separate parts for each body parts. So like they put on as little force they put on is as little as half a leg and the other half the leg. And the training has to do to get them ready for missions has included living under water. Yeah. For 12 days.

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You know, like in an underwater like room. No. In a swimming pool. No, no. Yes.

[00:23:26]

Not possible. How would you eat or go to the bathroom. He'll be like in a dugout on the water. It'll be like being in here. So be like being in space but under the sea. Yeah. They're doing it for pressure differences. OK, well Tim sorry. He's not like floating around underwater for twelve days. Fine.

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Well then Tim I'm taking that back because anyone could do that. Yeah, correct.

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And you lived in your mansion under the sea. Anyone could live in a huge penthouse on the sea.

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Yeah. Yeah. Talash not just floating around.

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OK, one of the experiments he has created space is monitoring his bone density before, during and after the mission. And he also monitors this blood pressure and takes ultrasounds of various parts of his body.

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So sometimes, oh, this is the bit that scares me.

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I have to say, this is why I don't want to go to space, because I'm scared that I'm going to get lost in space and I'll just float away.

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You won't be like that. You don't just get to wander around space.

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Yeah, I know, but I wanted to get to leave the spacecraft one years of training.

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What if one of those at all are they called an asteroid? What if one of them hits the rocket? I'm on and it breaks away. Rocket breaks away from what I'm on. Yeah.

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And then I'm lost. If that asteroid hits your space shuttle, you'd be in deep shit.

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Yeah, I'd be floating in space on my own. And that there's nothing worse than that might suspect. Like, you know, when you watch films and there are these kind of asteroid showers or meteor storms that come out of nowhere.

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It's my personal opinion, and I could be wrong, that the spaceship would be able to detect those earlier on and be able to move much in any way that we can predict weather here.

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Well, they're tethered to the spacecraft so the astronauts won't float away. Yeah.

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And, you know, there's no weather to contend with either. So if you're in space floating around, if you move a certain so if you propel yourself forward at a certain pace, you'll just continue on that traction forever.

[00:25:26]

So you need to be able to stop yourself. So it's like it's not like here where there's gravity, there's obviously no gravity and there's no wind and there's no weather. So you can propel yourself.

[00:25:36]

And with her numerous ways roster that's attached to the spacesuit, I'll thrust you if you're not careful. My trusty thrusters and.

[00:25:43]

Oh, yes, I'll give you I'll give you a good thrust. Wears me. I want to see Valentine's Evening tonight. Looking forward to a good thrusting. No, no, don't listen.

[00:25:50]

I think you're. Benny has had his tarots read by Penny Ivashov, and he loved it.

[00:25:59]

I did like it, honey. Penny is to on what she said because Spencer actually made me do a pregnancy test this week after he had his reading with Penny.

[00:26:06]

But Penny told me that it wasn't going to help until a little bit later with me.

[00:26:10]

Penny told me that you're currently pregnant with twins. That's not what she said to me because she said whatever she said, she said to me, she said, it's going to be honest. She backtracked. You know why she's backtracked? Because I sent her a photo of a negative pregnancy test and I called her a fraud.

[00:26:24]

No, because before before that, before it even done the test, I said to Patti, and she is like, oh, by this certain date, she's told me. So there is a certain date for her.

[00:26:33]

Dates, by the way, are a bit loose. Yesterday she gave me date. She said, you're going to receive incredible news for your company between June 20th and September 20th.

[00:26:41]

I said, I'm going to say, Penny, I said that is likely, regardless of whether you tell me that she doesn't know anything about your company, that's like me saying you're going to get good news between now and midnight. She knew. She knew. She knew randomly. She knew my brother had a toothache. And he's actually getting his wisdom tooth out on Saturday and it's really bothering him.

[00:27:00]

Well, thinking about it, I might have given her a bit of a stare. She did say that he wasn't sleeping very well and that he had pain. Yeah. So I said, yeah, and his mouth, because he's wet, he's not wet. He's not that wet. He does with Japan.

[00:27:13]

And she told us something about one of our friends that we both believe. Oh yeah. Apparently my best mate is gay, which I've long suspected. Yeah. But he doesn't fancy me apparently which I made me fair enough. Which made me happy and slightly irate good taste. But Penny was amazing. You were really happy after that chat. Yeah, I like Penny.

[00:27:32]

I thought she's a nice person. We enjoyed each other's company.

[00:27:35]

Yeah. She's brilliant. Mm. She is brilliant.

[00:27:37]

I got one for Louisa too my manager and she told my manager some pretty cool stuff is a good gift actually because you know, if you're, if you're looking to get a gift for, for someone, it's not as expensive as you might think it would be.

[00:27:49]

And it's kind of cool to know that sometimes, like because she's like like she's not like what you think a tireder kind of person would be. She's really I mean, she goes around in like pronation sportswear, like which is really cool sports right now. It's a weird way to describe it, but that's I'm trying to describe it. Just think, why would you think that we would think anything different?

[00:28:08]

Because she has sort of a cat on her head. I know, but she's really she's quite a schoolgirl. But like she says sometimes that like, she could be in like the Q in the post office.

[00:28:16]

This is like going back to when they were when we were all in cahoots with each other and that like, sometimes I would have to be in queues and somebody will, like, come to her. So, like, there could be a man in front of her and one of his dead relatives will just surround her and she'll be like, oh, I don't know if I should tell him or not the light, because it's so weird to just go up to somebody random.

[00:28:36]

Do you think they know not to do that to me? Because they know not to bother me? Because you don't have a gift? No, no. But even if I had the gift, I wouldn't want someone just like appearing in front of me. Now, like I have thought about this.

[00:28:47]

I wouldn't want my dad to come visit me. No, thanks to Scary. You're always banging on about your dad. Yeah, because he's my dad.

[00:28:53]

You talk about your dad all the time. But why wouldn't he why would you want to visit either? Because it was kind of frightened me, because I don't like ghosts.

[00:28:58]

You're very aware that even my dad ghost. We're going to play our game Tear-jerker, which shockingly Scrooge over there really enjoys.

[00:29:11]

I'm not a Scrooge. You're Scrooge. No, I'm not.

[00:29:14]

Every week, Varjak and Spencer have a subject bouncing back and they use your title and they put items associated with that subject into tears, writing them either God, top mid shit, God top made or shit.

[00:29:29]

No, we're not putting in a bore. So it goes from medium to shit. That's unfair.

[00:29:34]

And whatever. Let's go. OK, so we're going to do one, right.

[00:29:37]

And the one this week is going to be singers. Ready. OK, ok, pitbull. Sorry he's got to me. Pit pit bull gold to you.

[00:29:48]

Makes me so happy when I see him wandering around in his white. Excuse me.

[00:29:54]

Uh oh. I didn't get any more than I should tonight. I'm a little more than I could do. Not like tomorrow. I do love that song.

[00:30:04]

He just makes me so happy. He has a song last night. He doesn't give a shit. He's his jeans are always so nice. Yeah.

[00:30:11]

He's got three things in this. Next one will be interesting.

[00:30:16]

Paul McCartney. You know who he is, yes, he's one of the Beatles. Oh, well done. I know that from watching yesterday. He actually is the songwriter. Well, he's got to be a God, hasn't he? Yeah, we have to, because it is because of the Beatles, which would demote Pitbull to top. OK, we'll put people in trouble. Can we talk? Paul McCartney can't be the same catchphrase.

[00:30:37]

Other people makes me so happy. Pitbull and Paul McCartney rubbing shoulders is just crazy. My dream for a knockdown is over. Obviously I want to go see my family, but I really want to see people in concert.

[00:30:46]

All right. You can take your girlfriends. Oh God. It's going to be bad news.

[00:30:51]

Capaldi is getting these great greatest top. He's not a God now. He's not God. He's he's very good, though. What would have been top. I thought you were going to put him in, Cheche. Well, no, I don't mind. I like Taylor Swift. Made many. Yeah, but she's just like I am I am like I do like all that poppy crap. Yeah. And I do prefer American rock and roll to UK rock and roll for sure, like these grungy bands from up north the like.

[00:31:17]

I just, I don't, I can't live with it. Oh Arctic Monkeys and so forth. Okay.

[00:31:23]

So if we like you but we, we don't listen to Jon Bon Jovi.

[00:31:29]

God. God.

[00:31:30]

Actually legends above God.

[00:31:34]

OK, it's time for couples cards.

[00:31:38]

What was your first thought when I told you I was pregnant?

[00:31:41]

I thought you were joking initially. The first time around. The first time around. So we were Amsterdam Airport. Yeah, we were in Spain. He was still drinking at the time. And I was like, I think I am. So I got a test there and I went to the toilet and I just actually burst out laughing because it's kind of like, oh my God, you're kind of in disbelief, but like you're happy at the same time.

[00:31:58]

And I went and told Swannie and he got the biggest pint of wine I've ever seen.

[00:32:03]

And I was like, oh, another good excuse for a drink.

[00:32:08]

Yeah, well, it's very exciting. It was exciting. And when you when you were pregnant again, I was so delighted and actually I was disappointed yesterday when the tests came back negative. I was not there. You are. You are.

[00:32:21]

But no, I wasn't really talking about I was so ill.

[00:32:24]

You're you're this kind of person who thinks you have to live in London and thinks that you want to enjoy your summer is bullshit. Like, let's just get on with it.

[00:32:32]

No, I want to enjoy my summer. You want to enjoy your summer? Yeah. Yes. So you want to wait to have more kids so that you can enjoy your summer?

[00:32:41]

I imagine that's that's ridiculous. Listen, we're having four kids. I want to have them space. And we though if we're having fun during the summer. Yeah, we are having fun next summer. In the summer, I'm thirty five I five years. I have two more kids. It's all right. Right. My mom had me when she was 42. She got seven years.

[00:32:58]

Yeah. Well what's the weirdest thing you've seen in someone else's home. I was in a sheet before and this fella had a sore dildo before. I won't say whose time it was, but I think we're told he's. I didn't touch it either. Revolting, obviously.

[00:33:13]

Why would you touch anyone else's dildo? I don't know. I didn't, though, obviously. Whose home? I won't tell you made it to me. I'll tell you afterwards. No, I really don't know about. Yeah, anyway, let's move on. Oh, God, anyone still don't know thank you.

[00:33:30]

And I was in this man's house for sheep before and he had a he had a flamingo, a stuffed flamingo in his house.

[00:33:37]

Yeah, great. I think we should go. I love flamingos.

[00:33:41]

OK, how do you hang your toilet? Roll over under. What does that mean.

[00:33:45]

It means is the role facing outwards or inwards. Inwards.

[00:33:50]

We don't. I don't know. Yeah. We don't care. Yeah. We actually don't care. I didn't even know that was a thing. What would make you valuable. A valuable. It should be outwards.

[00:33:58]

So it comes that way so you can fold it in hotels so you can live.

[00:34:01]

So that's the way to what would make you a valuable ally in a zombie apocalypse? I think I'm pretty like I'm I'm sporty.

[00:34:09]

You would be shocking.

[00:34:11]

Not if I had an axe you would, but you would go to a zombie and chop its head off. You you hate blood. You hate violence.

[00:34:19]

You would fare horrifically.

[00:34:22]

I'll tell you what would make me amazing. In a zombie apocalypse, you're going to be amazing. Obviously, I'm a blue belt jujitsu practitioner. I will all reneke choke the shit out.

[00:34:31]

The zombies. I don't watch them. You have to chop, that's all. I don't give a shit about zombies.

[00:34:35]

I often think in the middle of the night, by the way, when I come in here to get cheese, milk and the whole house is dark and it's there's no one around, I often in the back of my mind thing why if I open the door and that's just like someone stood in the middle of the room, kind of, you know, who's broken into the house. And I often welcome that challenge. But, you know, I feel like I open the door feeling right.

[00:34:56]

OK, go on then. If there is someone in here, you pick the wrong fucking house.

[00:35:00]

That's happened to my dad a couple of times. Honestly, of course he has.

[00:35:03]

He lives in everyone knows everything fucking weird happens. And he lived in Port Mandic same shit twice. He woke up to a man in his room. One man had a syringe ready to attack him.

[00:35:15]

They go perfect now. He did only and he did sleep with a lot of money beside the bed.

[00:35:19]

Um, right. Which is handy for me during my robbing days. Yeah, but Kronberg used to steal.

[00:35:26]

What was your famous last words be?

[00:35:29]

Thank you. So please don't let me die yours. Yeah, exactly. To who.

[00:35:36]

To the world. Please don't let me die. Get on with it and stop talking. Shit. I didn't want to go outside so I'd say, I'd say get on with it.

[00:35:44]

Don't let anything hold you back and don't, don't listen to the way the world is going. It's boring and stupid.

[00:35:50]

If you could have any mythical creature as a pet, what would it be. A unicorn publications. You would love it. I think I'd have donkey from Shrek now. I'd have a little dragon.

[00:35:58]

Actually, I had one year when I was, um. I was really young. I think I was. About eight or nine? Uh, no, I would have been nine because it was my brother's 21st, you went to Vegas and I was allowed to gamble in the children's casinos to have these big hotels, had had gambling areas for kids, and he'd go down and play like cards with dealers and stuff, and you'd win fluffy toys instead. And I won a big red dragon called Vegas.

[00:36:29]

I called in Vegas and had these big eyes and he was epic. And I'd like him to be real.

[00:36:37]

OK, time for emails from our listeners. First up, it's Natasha, Dear Mustachio, now, most dear Spencer Vogue, I absolutely love your podcast, mostly because of your brutal honesty about things, which is refreshing nowadays compared to influencers on social media who aren't genuine. Correct. I would love for you guys to start in agony on part of your podcast where people send in their problems and you give them advice. I think it would be hilarious. Go on and give me a problem.

[00:37:03]

What happened to the agony aunt and Uncle Ben? We got word of it all. Give me a problem.

[00:37:07]

I'm can I finish this? Do you think she might give us a problem? Go ahead. Sorry, Natasha. I'm 22. I'm from Manchester. I have a great job and an investment bank in London, which I start in September, and I'm super excited for it. I'm also moving into a flat. My boyfriend in Clapham as he works there too. As much as I love him and we're best friends, I'm slightly nervous to live together as he very much has his own way of doing things.

[00:37:28]

As do I.

[00:37:29]

How do you recommend adjusting to this and living with your partner for the first time? Compromise, Natasha.

[00:37:35]

Compromise. Just make sure that you both know the rules, have rules, have jobs that each other, hostages and jobs.

[00:37:42]

Nobody. It sounds like you're going to prison. Just just continue to love each other, have a nice relationship compromise, do things for each other.

[00:37:49]

It's not a real problem. It's rules and jobs. It's not a real problem. Natasha.

[00:37:53]

Chores, but the chores. Yeah. Caroline's next. Hi, Spencer and Vogue, really enjoying the pod, felt compelled to reach out to ensure you, Spencer, to ensure you, Spencer, have discovers Frank's hot sauce. It's astounding. A marvel. Simply the best hot sauce going. I buy it by the gallon from Amazon. I bought some of that from Amazon.

[00:38:11]

What how does that get? Well, after you read that, yeah. But know, ages ago I thought I was going to make his wings.

[00:38:17]

So you mix it with butter, you make wings and you mix it with bottle poly text in high school and vogue.

[00:38:24]

I saw that the Queen is hiring an Instagram manager or senior employee communications assistant offering 27 K year plus benefits, working alongside the Queen High and got me thinking, which celeb do you think would be the best colleague in the world?

[00:38:41]

I don't really know. Why would there have to be a celeb? I would prefer not to be colleagues with with a celeb egotistical maniacs. I believe that they're better than other people.

[00:38:51]

I'd like I wouldn't mind trying to get that job with the queen, trying to get my feet in the door of Buckingham Palace. I'm going to be knighted. Yes, I am.

[00:39:01]

You've heard it here. First, I'm going to get a Dame Hood. Is that what it's called? Oh, yeah. You can't be nice. It I'll get it. Maybe I'll get a nice hit. You get knighted, I'll get a dame hood.

[00:39:10]

Who else would I like to work for?

[00:39:13]

I'm nosy so I'd like to work for. I don't know. I'd look like Leonardo DiCaprio. See what he gets up to. I'm just thinking about that.

[00:39:19]

Twenty seven grand a year plus benefits is like a social media manager, a normal company. We get paid more than that. So why would people take a pay cut to work for the queen? I find that bizarre. Because you're working for the queen. Yeah, exactly. It should be more butler that we met that worked for the queen. Yeah. He wouldn't have gotten paid that much. But then you say I worked for the Queen for more than twenty seven so you can get any job you want.

[00:39:40]

Whatever.

[00:39:40]

And I'll work for the Queen if any, if anyone from the palace is listening. Yeah. I'm very good at social media. Yes. Quite good actually.

[00:39:47]

So if you're looking for somebody to help Elizabeth out on there, you've got a name bigger for you to, to, to do that and allow all your other work to fall through the sieve.

[00:39:58]

Okay, yeah. I'll be allowed to do anything else, so I'll be working for the Queen. Okeydokey. Perfect.

[00:40:02]

That sounds like a great deal. That is it. And as always, we'd love to hear your thoughts. So send in your emails to Spencer and Vogue Pod at Gmail dot com. And if you're thinking about leaving us a review and a few stars, don't bother if it's not a great review and it's not five stars because actually that is just better and less disappointing. Yeah, and we won't love you, but we love you, Phillipi. So have a great week and we'll see you next week.

[00:40:33]

Yesterday. Oh, my drought.

[00:40:36]

That's so far away. Disgusting. Oh good.

[00:40:39]

How are you. Not really though. That was good. Don't deny it is okay. The first one was better. OK.