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This is a cast recommends every week we pick one of our favorite shows, and this is one we think you're going to love.


In each episode of the Dublin Storyline podcast, we bring you three personal, true stories that will hopefully make you laugh, because I knew Marad had done it with the deep sea diver, maybe even cry.


The adrenaline hits her system and she cries. And I've never been so happy to hear her cry, but always make you feel closer.


He hadn't been fooled by my clever lie. He was the first person I'd ever told the truth to the Dublin Storyland podcast available now on ACRS.


A cast is home to the biggest podcast from Ireland and around the world. Subscribe to this show and hundreds more now via cast or wherever you get your podcast.


48 are the mobile network that's questioned how mobile is done, so we're asking, what are your weirdest questions this week making? Wexford asks, Would you rather have the power of light or the power of invisibility, invisibility before hand?


Elastica finally know what people are thinking about, might just sneak up on them.


And here to give an me, I would sneak into the cookie dressing room. Oh, I hear crazy things go on in their power flight before hundi on holidays.


Yeah. Where are you going. Wherever I want. Yeah. And then you don't have to queue up. No need for passport. You probably don't have to go through security and you don't have to try and ram that carry on suitcase into little thing that they say it's meant to fit in, that it doesn't really fit in. That is all just a lie.


Well, what are you going to do with your luggage when you're flying? I'll just strap it onto me. Let's get a good rucksack. I'll invest in a good rucksack.


And what about if you have someone going with you, Mrs. or something? She's going to hold hands with her lot, which is ratchet her on to me like the snowman, you know, I mean, flying through the air, walking.


Oh yeah. Yeah, she worked for him class. Do I have wings. Well, if you want, I'd rather have an engine.


Check out how far delayed are changing up mobile plans starting from nine ninety nine to let you do more with your data. You can donate it, share it, save it and more trade for yourself.


Get your free gigabyte on forty eight today and check out your dirt later in the podcast for a chance to win cool prizes thanks to 48.


Instead, to Johnny's podcast, to Johnny's podcast, to Johnny's in the podcast. Hello, hello, hello, welcome to the two Johnnys podcast, bringing you all the major news from the world of the two, Johnny Johnny B. Johnny Cmax, welcome to podcast. One hundred and twenty eight coming to you like Casey in the Sunshine Band. That's the way.


Oh, ha ha.


I like sing that today. Yeah. Oh yeah. You learn something new every day in this podcast. On this week's podcast, we answer Dear Johnny's dilemma about a young man who wants to come out as gay to his teammates.


And he claims that Gary Neville's father started the famine and Colonel Sanders shot to pack. Noel far along will be here with that Tainos. There's a giddiness in the studio because she is live in studio with us. She's on her way to cark for a filthy weekend. Martin is here with her mystery topic. Live an exclusive life.


And as traditional skipping out of mass, what everyone is going up for communion.


We run off the podcast with our yards under a little dirt before commencing with proceedings. Matters arising from last week's podcast. Dirt.


Yes, Mr. Chairman. Anonymous emailed to say first on this story. Let me give you some background. It was a Thursday night. I had my first training session with a new football team in Sydney, Australia.


As I arrived first, I also met another new recruit. We instantly hit it off. Ah, football friend, but football friend. Let's call him John for the story. The next night I went for a few drinks after work. As I got a bit tipsy, I met this lovely girl. We hit it off, ended up staying out for the night, getting pissed. Eventually the night ended and we ended up back at her place. The next morning I was awoken in her bed, a bang on the door and the door was kicked open.


I instantly thought, Oh no, it's her boyfriend. However, it was a French guy shouting someone shit some when shit followed by another guy. You guessed it. It was football friend John. I got dressed and walked over to the window where a French guy said somebody had shit out the window and it landed on his car. My laughter instantly stopped as the girl, the French guy and John all stared at me accusingly. I suggested it could have been from an apartment above, but little did I know we were the top apartment.


As I refused to clean the shit and was being ignored by the girl, I decided to leave the situation as I walked out the door and watched John, who was the shit off the car. I knew our friendship and my fledgling football career was over. I decided not to dwell on the situation in the taxi home as I would probably never see her again. Fuck it, I thought I'm innocent, but there's more. As I walked into my apartment, which I shared with my brother and his girlfriend, she said, Oh, you stayed with my workmate last night, Frank.


I had to tell her the story. Later that day, I received an angry text from the girl all caps saying she can't believe I shit out the window. I pleaded my innocence again, even going as far back to say this shit was like a shot. If it was me, it would have been on her sheets. She ignored me and went on to tell me that they were evicted later that day. To this day, I still don't know where the mystery shit came from.


I was really drunk. I was. I really that drunk or am I being falsely accused? Hashtag set up. I nearly had to move back to Ireland to save face footnote. The slide up window was further than the toilet.


Anyway, keep up the good work. Give Noel my best regards. The anonymous shitter. Yeah.


Phantom shitter. Is it possible to shit out somebody's window? I remember I've never tried it.


I've went to toilet and some awful places but never out a window. I would say it's unlikely but possible.


Yeah it happens man. Listen, you know I have a story, but I probably won't tell it.


Another anonymous listener said, I'm a long time listener and a podcast and I've decided to write in a story about my long term girlfriend who turned twenty one a few weeks ago. Long term, a twenty one. It'll never last.


Oh, I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. This time last year she was having her 20th birthday and she had ordered a dress for her party. It came a few days before the party in the post, along with another box, which I grabbed quickly and said it was a part of her birthday present, thinking nothing of it, she went upstairs and tried on her dress, as it had been in the post. The dress was fairly creased, so her mother told her she'd iron it for her.


On her birthday, she was getting ready for the party tinking. Her mother put her dress into wardrobe. She checked in there but couldn't find it. So she went and checked her mass wardrobe to see if it was there. When she opened the wardrobe, the dress was there as she was taking it, she looked down and she noticed the box her man had said was a surprise for her.


As she bent down to look at it, she noticed it was open. She also noticed a wire coming out of it. She thought was a new hair straightener, as she had told her mother she needed a new one for months previous, as she picked it up, she realized she hadn't picked up a hair straightener and it was, in fact, a used vibrator. In the shock, she dropped the box, knocking everything out of the box to discover it did low lube and many more sexual toys.


Luckily, everyone was also getting ready and didn't hear the bang. She immediately put everything back in the box and ran out to get me. I looked at her and realized she was as white as a ghost. And I asked, was she OK? She didn't say a word. She just grabbed my arm so tight I thought she'd burst one of my veins. She dragged me upstairs, pointed at the box. I looked at it and thought it was just something used for her here.


I soon came to realize what exactly it was and I tried to contain my laughter. Still not saying a word. My girlfriend Desilu got sick with the thought of it. That's clearly her dad wasn't doing a good enough job.


Shit has been thrown a year on.


She still traumatized and hasn't looked at her to see him since. Love the podcast. Keep up the good work. We don't want the Morgan case. Her parents listen to the podcast and has the morgue.


No offense, you can't say that the dad was doing a good enough job.


You don't know what they're into honestly like. Are we sure it's not a eating, a curling one? They do resemble I did, Johnny. She's 21 years. Well, that's what I've been telling myself.


So let me get this straight. The man ordered the vibrator for herself.


Yeah. And then went inside a box like, oh, that's for DA.


OK, ok, ok. That's well, I'm going to give your daughter a second hand vibrate.




If I knew one like anyone got the motors number on schools.


Last week's topic, Miss Anonymous was in touch to say I'm a teacher and I've walked into my classroom to 30 14 year olds singing along to the copper song.


So I know some of them will be listening and they shouldn't be.


So last week, you talking about different schools and I am here to give my ultimate Rhondda as I went to an all girls school and I've worked in nearly all types of schools. Students can thrive in all schools. This is purely my opinion, but I do believe it all boils down to ability, support from home and good senior management of a school. Right. Number one, all girls, non fee paying schools. Amazing if you're confident and willing to get involved.


Bitchiness exists but gets rarer in older years. Being with girls all day can make you turn a guy into a God, putting them on a pedestal and having absolutely no chill for the first few years of college.


I agree to a degree, if you went to the school like that, an all girls. Yeah, yeah.


I like when I think of, like, the weirdos that I used to fancy, they can take things like, oh God, just men.


OK, there's an all girls fee paying school said it can be such a happy place when students or students can embrace every holiday themed week event. However, I've never seen more students suffering with mental illness and anxiety in all my life due due to a huge amount of stress and pressure.


I can't say that's across all of them like. But in her experience. And then can I pronounce this right? Desh Yeah.


DS mixed schools. Can somebody googled the exact meaning of that for me please. If the management is good, there can be the most incredible places for students to learn how life really is. Students get incredible social skills and everyone will leave with hours worth of hilarious stories. If you're trying to get the high points, it can be hard to focus in class when you have John in the corner shouting abuse at the teacher. But it's possible she she must have been in my class.


It just explain what the schools are. So there are schools that will be located in what will be perceived as disadvantaged areas. Therefore, those schools get extra funding and the term is delivering equal opportunity in schools sometimes.


Yeah. Well, I wonder, are schools that. Well, most vocations go, yes, I am.


So, so, so they're not all right. I don't think that people in school know they're in their school. Yeah.


Yeah sometimes.


Yeah. OK, yeah. Mixed non fee paying schools. Incredible education because girls can do more hands on subjects like woodwork and guys can do homework which is rarely found in single sex schools. And fortunately open mic sport is amazing. An inclusive standard of work is high, but there is less pressure. In early years there can be drama over who fancies who, however. But by the senior years, everyone has a more realistic idea of the opposite sex because they've seen them at their worst Irish speaking schools.


I appreciate the use of the language and that someone is keeping it alive. I've seen the worst cases of students arrogance in these schools, although it seems to fizzle out after a transition year.


My biggest issue was some sixth year about to go to college, wanting to do science courses and not knowing the English name of a beaker or a conical flask gives me chills hearing those names conical flask because they only know them in Irish I how can you get to six year not knowing the word in English like because you've never you wouldn't use the English word for conical flask in your general life at home.


So you know, and if you're an Irish girl you're only using Irish terms.


OK, Machel's was over the conical flask. They're full of milk. Fair enough. However, the crack is meeting the schools with Cayley's and translations happening and the students keeping our heritage alive.


I would one hundred percent send my own scared kids excuse me, Freudian slip there to a mix, non fee paying school, but only if the management had the players running. Well, also on terms of trans students and single sex schools, I was teaching in a girls school with a student who identified as a male and who was transitioning. The only option, the only opinion on should he stay or go that. It was to us was his he wanted to stay with all his friends and finish school with us, so that's what he did.


If he wanted to move, we would have done everything we could to help him settle into his new school. Sorry for the essay of info. I'm passionate about the subject. Thanks for entertaining me on the commute's Miss Anonymous, who's a teacher.


That's that's that's the kind of stuff we want, you know, that long.


And we would have it was good luck, but we would have gotten away with it if it wasn't for those pesky kids. And another anonymous listener said they all seem to be anonymous right now about schools, mostly because I'd say they work. And school teachers say hello to Johnny and Maureen, longtime listener First-Time Caller here, in relation to boarding school wanks that came up in last week's episode, I have many stories that may interest you, having gone to boarding school from 13 to 18.


So you wouldn't get this often.


You would not that nobody is not broadcasting this every morning and go on and they all went to the very high. And I tell you, Joe was terrible the way. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Full of article one of the best.


Maushart, go ahead there. Are you one of the best, most horrible what was one time when we were all around fifteen years of years old and there was three of us sharing a room, it had just gone lights out pitch black and we were still chatting for only ten, fifteen minutes chatting to usual fifteen year old Bysshe. The guy in the bed opposite me was known for Tulgan one off in the room. So I said, Andrew, please wait until I'm asleep tonight before you go out yourself, you dirty bastard.


You replied, Don't worry, I already had one. I said quite like earlier. Then he said, No, I just don't know.


The two beds were about three to four foot apart and he was very much involved in the conversation over the last ten minutes. From then on, he became known as the Ninja Wanker, feeling slightly violated. I got him back the next day by doing something I'm not very proud of to his retainer.


Oh, I thought it was justified, seeing as he basically looks at me. If the hashtag Metoo Movement had been around when we were in school, we'd have all been thrown in jail. But we're not all chinaware and wine drinking defore, posh fuckers, most of my friends from school or some lads whose parents had very normal jobs. Cheers.


They all were sound lads, which is wanker each other and do stuff to the retainers.


I'm glad I didn't go to boarding school.


That's a bridge too far now for me. Yes, the retainer has countrymen's motive. You need it.


Yeah, that's just too far. Too far.


How did he how did he crack one off on the thing. Oh he must. I thought that had to be able to concentrate while they're doing it.


So obviously not this lad. He's got mind control. You've got to I have three kids. What's he doing? So you having a chat with the last guy on the actual team? Liverpool's farm at the moment isn't great, but it's probably going to get that for me.


Yeah, strange. Another anonymous listener said, I thought I'd get in touch with my experience of a private school in the Tipperary region that may or may not have been named by Johnny Cmax in the previous episode. I was in first year, the year they won the Leinster senior in twenty fifteen. That is rugby. And let me tell you, the place was a madhouse. The school has since calmed down, but there were all kinds of weird and cool traditions.


For example, House Captains Day, where one day of the year after school, senior House captains were voted in by the students. Everyone would blow off class and run out of the school, through the forest and into the fields where a ceremony would take place, which resulted in many people jumping into the river and an Olympic style set of games to take place, including the notorious Fat Man Run, where all the lads on the larger side would raise each other around the field.


There were countless other traditions in during chapel run which involved students screaming chapel run at one a.m. and then about fifty young lads having to run through the college in the pitch dark to the college chapel where they would touch the altar and run back to the dorm. Nine times out of ten we would get caught. It sounds more like priest. There was silly season where during the summer months, fifth six years would actually hunt down younger years and tie them up or throw them into the river.


Well, the adrenaline of running away from a bunch of older lads to the fields in this traditional manhunt was great, but you really wouldn't want to get caught. When my brother attended the school, there used to be actual riots and a member of staff ended up chasing students across the hurling and rugby pitches in his car in the middle of the night. And guards have often been called out. Some of the best crackers had at nighttime when dorm wars against the rest of the boys in the year and flipping lads mattresses while they were asleep to the rugby schools.


We played against the Dobbyn. We were seen as coaches in mock savages. What do people from outside of Dublin, we were perceived as pretentious, posh boys. Maybe we are and I just don't see it. I myself have never owned a pair of cream chinos and just like having to crack the whole Brotherhood thing, though, couldn't be more true with a small year of about 40 days until we kept in touch with each other fairly well each year since we've left.


The thing about the school is that because you live there, it becomes your home. In a way, there's a strong sense community. I suppose that's why most of the lads here are proud of the school they came from. I also think that in a way, it's a good thing that it's an all boys school because I think lads will get caught up trying to impress girls and not be themselves with the lads.


Also, the food was class of the podcast. Keep It Up from Anonymous in CCR.


Your school sounds mental.


Yeah, that's again not not I didn't go to. Yeah, you're not selling it to me.


Maria said I'm private. Schools haven't taught in both private and public schools. I thought I'd share a story or two. First day in an unnamed private boy's rugby school in Dublin. The lads and my six year ordinary level maths class were essentially the senior team, plus a few more. They had a full scrum in the middle of the classroom as they walked in the door and asked me to referee. I refused, obviously, but it was absolute mayhem.


I thought to myself they didn't teach me how to deal with this in college. It all worked out OK, though, and we got on great over the course of the year, the Bears chinos, our part of the uniform for senior students. Another time one of the lads challenged another fellow to name three places on the north side.


He started with up. I enjoy teaching there. The lads were great, but I prefer teaching to my current public girlschool.


Less politics, anonymous head. I went to a private boarding school in Connacht and well, there wasn't much fancy about it. A few straw mattresses. In 2011, I had about four or five hot showers. In six years, a pillow was worth more than a bag or ice to a Chinese man, and the housemaster was about as sober as Father Jack.


You found out. So now it is one of the cheaper private schools in Ireland, still nearly ten thousand euros per year to board and two grand for day pupils. But the crack was on real order lads crammed in a building. It was what I could only imagine a jungle is like. Once the lights went out at ten thirty, the night duty gave fucked off. All hell would break loose where dawn raids lads jumping out the three storey windows onto a pile of mattresses, fight clubs, still fun young lads and suitcases and throwing them down the stairs.


We even set alight on fire once.


So I started reading that. I'm not surprised. I thought they were going to say we set off the fire alarm. We set a man on fire. One.


Oh, that's not correct. That's like arson or bodily harm. There's something wrong with these fellas.


Your man last saw at least one any trip every week during the night lock.


The hospital was across the road. Cheers. It sounds a bit aggressive, does it? I tell in the public school, Gore lads, you get home at three o'clock and you don't get set on fire. Yeah. Last week's mystery topics and the food back and restaurants. Kira said, hi, lads. I absolutely love the podcast and your topic this week on sending food back in restaurants. I actually had to get in touch. I don't know what it is, but when it comes to eating out, I have the worst look with food.


I'm not a picky eater and I wouldn't be looking to make changes to the dishes or anything like that. But Jesus Christ, someone must have put a curse on me. I've had strings of Brillo pads in my food twice in two different restaurants, one in Kilkenny and one very well-known steak restaurant in Dublin. I've had a black rubber nozzle off a dishwasher in my rice in a very high end Curry restaurant and many other incidents to the worst. One of all was in a hotel with my family just to casual burgers and sandwiches type meal.


I asked the waiter for some vinegar for the chips. He came back with a little joke. He looked a bit oily through vinegar, so I thought it must be vinaigrette or something. Dipped my finger in a tiny bit to taste it.


It was bleach burnt to tip of my tongue where I tasted, and I still have no taste buds on that spot to see I hit the roof, that there was an understanding only because my younger brother was widower's and he would have thrown it all over his chips and not realised until after Evenson. The waiter went white as a ghost when I went and told him and we got the entire meal, can't as it happens to me so much, I always let the servant all put in a polite and lighthearted way.


I know it's not their fault, but Jesus nearly took the head off that lad who brought me bleach from Egypt's Chira.


What he surely. Surely he got the sack.


You'd hope that was very close to like a very costly lawsuit. Yeah. Oh yeah. There's people suing. A reversal.


Tyler Leach. Christ, Adam from Adam. I said so a couple of years back, myself and the girlfriend went to France on holidays, was nearing the end of the trip, and we decided to end it on a high by eating some fancy stuff and a fancy looking place on the beach. So we placed our orders when the. It arrived, it looked class was about halfway through my meal when, as usual, me and the girlfriend said we try a bit of each other's food.


So I cut off a portion of my chicken.


When I noticed she started looking at it funny, saying it was a bit pink, me being color blind.


I wasn't really sure what this meant until I realized the entire center of the chicken on my plate was pure raw, hoping this was some sort of French delicacy. I called the waiter over asking her if this was normal. Were her eyes nearly shut out of her head and she ran away with the plate, confirming this was definitely no delicacy. To be fair, it was handled well. And as either a sign of good fat or an attempt to sterilize the half a chicken's worth of salmonella, I just digested the girlfriend and I were given a tray of free shots just just in case he got salmonella and couldn't decide whether it was a salmonella or trade shots that made him violently ill.


Jennifer didn't write a bad review or end up with food poisoning, but did end up with a free feed.


So I suppose all in all, the holiday did finish on a high, a big price to pay for a free meal, you know, raw chicken, Martin said. Producer Mora is being very picky about that chicken Kiev for a woman that once picked lasagna off the floor and ate it. Yeah, I don't remember that because I didn't. But it was in the extra part of it.


Yeah, it could have been. Yeah, I just I dropped it lasagna that I was after microwave and like, I didn't scoop up the bottom layer. I left the bottom layer on the floor.


Well USAC but come on.


Taking your partner's name. Kierra email saying on the topic of the whole double barrel surname's, I have both my parents surnames just to keep things awkward.


So my name is Kira Durnan White. No hyphen.


It was so awkward growing. Oh, people not being able to pronounce or spell my name correctly. It even got to a stage in secondary school where my home economics teacher told me my name was too long to fit on the rule book for taking attendance. I was told I had to choose one of my surnames that having two was awkward and greedy.


I went, Well, why did you have two surnames about your parents?


Maybe they weren't married. Yeah, she said, well, that's just on last week's podcast and talking about surnames after getting hitched. My cousin's surname is Murphy and her husband is Stout. Oh. So when she got married, she took his surname along with her on to make her Murphy Stout when they got married. Murphy's brewery here in CA got wind of it and put on a free beer at the reception.


Oh Dad, what's your first name? I changed my whole name to Guinness. Give a shit if Guinness want to cover the bar on my way. Johnny Guinness. I like it.


I knew that in Australia called Paddy Irish was his actual name.


He got it. He needs to change up a deep old man.


Irish man. I don't think he would tell you. Go on. I'm Paddy Irish. No, honestly, I got this idea of like that.


I got you so funny. If any drink brands want to contact me.


John Blue, Johnny Smirnoff Ice, Johnny Buckfast, Sarah said, I've always wondered what would happen in the future when two people would double barrel names get married. Well, they just keep that on top of our name. Or will they take both surnames and become a quadruple barrelled name?


I'm a teacher and I can only imagine the length of the roll call.


If kids have a good kids, have a quadruple barrelled name. Barry McDonagh, Don. Katie Finnerty.


I'm sure that's not like in Tipperary.


So many people are called Ryan. Yeah.


That they have another nickname almost.


Yeah. So like Rain Man, Rain Con, get whatever. The family have a nickname, it's only rains. And then I know two people, Coleraine who got married to each other and they were nicknamed Rain Squared.


That's really if my name was rain and if I can't make it rain as well. Rain. Rain. If your name was rain and you didn't have a family name like your kids would be known as the Greens back or something.


Class honestly considered changing my name at this place.


The weirdest thing I knew Family Court like rain rain manager because like their granddad was manager in the co-op or something. They became like rain manager for Craig. Shannon messaged in me. My girlfriend must get a snigger or joke mad at us at least once a week of sharing a name. If we marry, her name will be Shannon Shannon. That's class, and she refuses to go a double barrel. It's one of the favorite jokes at family gatherings and down to local.


She has openly admitted she prefers that name than having her own family name, Hawn, because of the jokes that come with it. As she says, I'm sniggering as well as bad. She works for a massive tech company and while travelling work, she uses it as a group icebreaker and always gets a good reaction. People out there love it. Tartous and listeners would enjoy it.


Shannon, Shannon, Shannon, Shannon, Shannon steadily. That's cool. She could be a wrestler.


Yeah. Shannon, Shannon, off the top ropes out of nowhere.


On round Dodgers bastards. Paul emailed podcast. One of the worst Ladd's ever is my friend.


He is the most miserable bastard I've ever met.


The same feller moved 40 minutes away, moved 40 minutes away to move out of the distance threshold so he'd be eligible for the grant going to college.


Oh, that's scumbag Gary.


Also a genius. But it was his round and we were all on the Heineken. It was his show to get the drinks. He came back with the pints. We all took a good sip of the paint and all agreed there was something fishy going on. And we had our doubts about the Heineken. He was adamant he got us three Heineken until I went and asked the barmaid, did some fella just by three points on Heineken here two minutes ago.


She said no, but there was one fellow who ordered a three pints of Tuborg and asked me to serve them in a Heineken Glass. The cheeky bastard was trying to shaft us with Tuborg all to save a few quid from Paul Flynn, not the Waterford harder Tubagus Grand, but like that is scumbag.


You can't be doing that. Let's you can't be doing that.


That's what was written to Berglas of Cuttack in college.


No, that was true. Or a point by you. Take it to the wealthy Lord. Leave it off now.


My favorite subject of all time on this podcast, Samba Soccer late father was a desperately yes.


Mexico's for losing touch and not on a traumatic topic. I used to be friends with a lad whose father was none other than Mr Samba. Soccer. Yes, the man who founded the Cold Summercamp. He was always shady about the specifics, but his dad was definitely a bit of a wheeler dealer who had never been to Brazil or had any interest in football before setting up the camp. He just saw the model being used in another country, saw a market for it here in Ireland.


He said you couldn't move for no soccer gear and a house growing up probably worth a fortune now.


And yes, the coaches were just lads from Brazil cos if there is any that some soccer gear lying around do get in contact.


A lot of the coaches were also not lads from the ninety seven percent hashtag Save our chicken rolls. Dylan was in touch. I got the first chicken or I have ever aged and apple green entrada and this was for your woo woo disclosure's good.


He does absolutely savage coffee as well. Hashtag Save our chicken rolls and that comes in from Dylan who possibly works at a hospital. I tell you, I don't know if it's a campaign by the people in Apple Green, but get them getting a lot of apple greens of this week they're doing because it's their anniversary or something.


They're doing chicken rolls for two euro. Forty seven. Good value.


The twenty fourth day of the seventh apple green. That's great value. Yeah.


And lastly, write another talking point from last week's podcast. Was the lady who was tweezing a ball sack.


I think if you'll remember that she was known as speed. Really? Yeah.


There was speed erections hitting in the face. Yes. So she has gotten back to us to update EDS. We wanted to know why she was tweezing the male genitalia.


And what about the speed, the speed erection? Do you ever see, like in The Simpsons when psycho babble stands on a rake? Yeah. And it pops off? Yeah. That's what I imagine this is like.


She pulls the tweezers and it's like, oh, well, wonder no more here, lads. I was listening to the podcast on Monday. I was only home from a day at Brittas Bay and was cooking dinner with my mate and telling her about the two journeys. Try to put them on, I said, singing your praises as she's only starting to listen to you. So I'm only delighted to hear you tell them my stories about last week's ball tweezing story.


Yes, I was tweezing to hear from the balls after I pulled the wax off because sometimes hair is left and clients go mad if you leave it there. So I get stuck in with the tweezers and they even had the tweezer peoples bombs.


You can imagine. Yeah, I can feel Johnny Cmax shuddering from here, from that. And as for the speed, Willy, I'm finding it hard to believe that Jews haven't had an erection as quick as a flash. It actually can be a reaction to the tweezing sensation. A client has told me that. Keep it. To get hit in the face, he's got to be moving like five miles an hour. Yeah, yeah.


If it was a slow burner, like surely have time to dodge it, like.


Yeah, like I've seen people dodge getting a box and office. Yeah. How fast is this like. Could you give us the number of the man who's got the speed. Really. We'd like to have him on the podcast so I would like some quite pixilated footage.


Hello Mr. Speed. Really. He'll be interested in the speed with the Olympics. OK, now who's going to win the two Johnnys podcast more kindly, sponsored by KC Sports, where you can buy two Johnnys merch, you can buy two Johnnys Martun, two Chinese DYI as well. Who's going to get their summer Solomont correspondence? That I feel like we've been talking for four hours. Who do you like for the morgue?


I like the teacher who sent in the very detailed break. Yes. What schools are like. A lot of effort in there and and some quite good facts, I would say.


OK, so Mrs. Teacher, I do like the mystery shirt, but I feel like that story didn't have a good enough resolution at the end.


Yeah, well, I wanted to find out it was his friend John from football who would actually just. Yeah, he was a phantom shitter.


Yeah, yeah, yeah. Listen, close second, miss teacher. You can email podcast's at the two Johnny's daughter. You would all contact details tomorrow I guarantee you. And we get your mug sent out as quick as possible. It has been a bit of a backlog on the Moakes, some irate mug people who we're not trying to mug you off here. Don't knock yourself. There is obviously a bit of a delay due to Corven stuff, but we're getting all the more excited and we get them out.


All right. Now with the weekly round up John Boy.


Yeah, well, you were talking I was talking about Trada Woog soldiers, but it just struck me because that Harry Styles song.


Yeah, Watermelon Sugar High Direct.


And he was like doing a core right in the studio would like Aymond from our Harry Styles is probably having like a Waldorf salad or something.


And he's like, hey, I don't know why he talks like, Hey Aman, why are you having for lunch.


What a man in sugar high definition. Oh yes. Well and sugar. Hey, freak me out.


Well, on that sugar high you said you reckon Harry Styles is from drama. No, no. He's just like that a lot of his songs because it's OK.


So you reckon he's co-written with and from a T maybe at the keyboard players in the back over here, maybe Harry Styles is like watermelon sugar. And he was like, hey, well, all men and sugar. Hey, speaking you want from me the watermelon sugar.


Hey, if it was to be watermelon sugar land or melon sugar land. And Harry, speaking of big summer hits.


Oh see you'd see the Segway there. Vroom vroom. Just drove that Segway. We have our new single coming out with this week, Thursday to talk to you, the July ropin our latest single draughtsmen. I recollect that we've been working on Jauron lockdown. Yeah. Do you know how musicians talk?


It's like, yeah. You know, so excited about this man. It's going to drop it so fresh. Just like our new record. Yeah. Record. You pour my heart and soul into this one.


I put it this way. No one will be listening to this on vinyl is not fuckin available. I want Apple now on Thursday and download it because if we get no one, we're going to wreck the gas. Yeah, we are going to have like I mean, Johnny is going to drink like a bag of cans from whatever in the garden drink company.


Want to sponsor cans. Cans matter to. Yeah, it's called Dancing in My Kitchen and it's out on Thursday and so is the video. Yeah. The video is a lot of fun. That'll be on Thursday evening. So you can go onto our Instagram, any of our social media and see the pre save Linklaters. So if you pre save it then as soon as it goes online you get little thing if you're on Spotify or Apple or any of those things and that will be great because we got all them preserves together.


It'll help us show off the charts.


Yeah, we're hoping to get number one and we'd really love your support. It's 99 cent to buy on the iTunes store. So, you know, give a little love and give ninety nine percent. We'd be very happy. We want to if we got no one to be our night.


Yeah, we're going for Westlife ten. Yeah, we get ten. We get to fight Westlife to that contract. They don't over. Yeah. And that's something everybody wants to see. So don't forget that's on Thursday and enjoy it. Put it on and if you're having a few drinks it's going to, it's going to get you in the mood.


Yeah. It's a song for everybody. Knockdowns, benzophenone. I mean yeah this is a happy song and the video is mental and you will see many familiar faces in the video as well.


And we are on Episode 18 of the Extra podcast. Thank you very much to everybody who has signed up and is listening to it over there.


Yeah, it's six Yarraman plus VAT. We love having to crack You can double your dosage Giannis new episode out every Thursday and more content And guess what we're working on life just for all our patron subscribers. Thanks very much John. OK, time for a dear Johnny's dear Johnny, I'm looking for advice on something I want to come out as geared to the lads on my junior team. I'm not sure how to take it and if it will make things uncomfortable.


I'd also be worried that people would shout abuse from the sideline. I told my parents and my sister recently and they were fine about it, but obviously they were worried for me as we live in a small rural community. I thought I might be bisexual for a long time, but being with a woman just isn't for me. I'm only young, but down the line I would like a family. Any help or advice would be appreciated. David, that's obviously not his real name.


We've changed his name for an amenity anonymity.


Yes. And then here we like big words of the two journeys. OK, well, ladies and gents, if you're wondering what percentage of the population are gay. Well, let us tell you this. In the 1940s and 50s, an American man did research into people's sexuality, although his research methods would now be considered archaic.


He estimated that the amount of people who are predominantly homosexual was around seven percent for women and 13 percent for men. And that's how the commonly shared belief that 10 percent of the population are gay came about. And a twenty fifteen Irish Times family values poll asked people to describe their sexuality. Four percent of respondents described themselves as gay, lesbian or bisexual. The real figure may well be higher, given that 10 percent of people polled chose not to answer the question.


If that poll is accurate, then one out of every twenty five Irish people is gay, and the 10 percent who chose not to answer were more likely to be older.


Younger people were more likely to identify themselves as gay or bisexual.


Yes, just a little bit of info on the history of gay rights in Ireland. In nineteen ninety three, same sex sexual activity was decriminalised. Isn't that mental? Yeah, I can, but I actually could not believe that we're doing it when we're doing the research to read that. That's mad. In 2010, legislation allowing civil partnership between same sex couples is passed in the door, and in 2015, same sex marriage became legally recognized in Ireland after a referendum.


Sixty two percent of the voters voted yes in favour. And in twenty nineteen, the gay takes part in Dublin Pride Festival and Parade for the very, very first time. The current situation, legislation banning conversion therapy is pending and the Irish Transfusing Blood Service has a policy banning gay men from donating blood unless they abstain from sex for 12 months previously. There's currently no openly gay male footballer or hurdler playing at senior county level. Donal Cusack's obviously retired, and David Goff is a gay referee who is openly gay and has spoken about gays need to do more to support the LGBT community.


Now, some well-known older male gay sports stars out there. Of course, there's Nigel Owens, the Welsh international rugby referee. He's a bit of a hero. Gareth Thomas is Wales most capped player and former British and Irish Lions captain. He came out last December.


Thomas Beatie recently became only the fourth male footballer after Fashanu, just interested in fashioning Thomas Hitzlsperger from Germany and Robbie Rogers from the US.


They'd come out publicly after playing in Britain, and Robbie Rogers told The Guardian that he left the sport after coming out because he didn't want the media attention and scrutiny. He said he's American is.


Yeah, I just want to be a footballer. Rogers said. I don't want to deal with the circus after people come. Are people coming to see you because you're gay or. I want to do interviews every day with people asking. So you're taking showers with guys. What's that like? To be fair, like if you were the only openly gay footballer in the Premier League, would you feel extra pressure to be class?


Probably, yeah. But like, someone's going to have to do one of these deaths.


I would like if I was the only Irish guy Pan American Football, I'd feel like the whole world is watching me or something. You know what I mean? Yeah, I was for taking showers.


I mean, if we were playing a mixed sport and I had to take showers with the women, like I would do it for the team.


Yeah, I you know, I'm sure you you know, if they're OK, I'm OK, you know.


But as long as you're still able to have a crack in a bit again, like, yeah. You got to be you've got to be so long as I can still say, hey, my eyes are up here.


There's no longer when we look at your jeans laddering and like, come on Earth, they've got fucking good last year.


Look at that right here in the dressing room. OK, talking points. That's is it still Tofte.


Come on Erlend. Like twenty twenty. I mean like six years ago if you're going to come out like you nearly had to have a press conference. Yeah.


Whereas nowadays I think it's like not as much of a big deal, it's very normal now.


Like Yeah.


Look like coming out obviously is is still a. And is probably a big deal for for for gay people to come out to their friends and family and stuff like that, but I think it's becoming less and less over the years. I mean, I know lads who are gay, and it's. It's not.


No, it's not.


It's not even like the thing that it used to be like he's gay. Did you know he's gay? Of course. Now, I don't think it's such a it's such a big deal. It like nobody nobody really bothers with it do.


Yeah. Like I think whatever your personal preference is like oh for a cocktail fairplay anyway, you know. Yeah.


I think, I think people are less forced by it now and obviously the referendum has helped that. Yeah. You know, in a major way I think that's kind of.


So like if what if one of our teammates said I I'm gay, like I want to change this and it's still no excuse for Mr. Trent.


You're not like the direction that changes the dynamic in the dressing room, like showering together and all that kind of stuff might be like, oh, this is like finding me. Like, obviously, that would be an issue for our friend, the Choco's, like everyone Fancy's.


Yeah. He's obviously the best looking man in the world, but no, I don't think so.


I'm playing like adult geor for, what, maybe ten years now? And I would say even in ten years it's probably changed.


I would have said it would have been a lot harder to come out as gay ten years ago down a G8 restaurant than it is now. I think men aren't as macho as like there still is a bit of machoism, I would say, down to dress from as in like we're all lads and we're all big, strong men.


And, you know, that's the way we act.


And we act off, what, like ten years ago that was a lot, lot worse.


Like, I think men were weren't as open minded as they are now, whereas like, honestly, our dressing room was so young lads will wear what they want, like, you know, I mean, like, lads, I remember years ago in the dressing room, like wear and like outrageous.


And of course you did. And you'd be worried about what someone would say to you. Yeah.


You know, I remember getting criticized for drink cause late once, you know, that that's that's the way it was. Whereas like and I'd wear outrageous clothes and I guess Lagann like, but I didn't care like whereas now it is the younger lads are coming through.


Yeah. I don't give a shit the old either. Er that'll do whatever they want.


Like where it's like, that's why I would think a gay man coming out in the dressing room nowadays would certainly be much easier. It's still, it's still tough. It will be very tough to do I think, but much easier than say ten years. Yeah but you think you should.


Is there a way to do it? Should you bring the manager and be like, look, I'm going to come out and all I know, like, is it should somebody say, look, look, hey, your Cmax is gay and he's going to come out like so I want to talk to the other players and just remind them, don't anybody giving him any shit or acting like and if somebody says something, the manager is going to intervene, like, is there a formal way you should do it?


A lot depends on the dressing room. I think so.


Yeah. Because you have like say what? There's, what, 20, 30 lads in the team. Everybody's going to have a different reaction.


So maybe you're better off to because I imagine somebody I spoke to this about before, they said that it's actually a really hard thing to say I'm gay. They'd rather say, oh, by the way, I have a boyfriend and. Yeah, you know, so, yeah, it might be easier just to speak to the manager and speak to the captain and then let the little grapevine filter down. And if anybody has a negative reaction, you don't have to deal with that.


That can be the manager or the captain's problem to deal with.


So, yeah, we're going to have to stand up and be like lads. You know, it's been a long time call if you don't have to make an announcement. Yeah, it's like, I dunno, dressing rooms, a weird place. Like I even feel we're standing up like Santa lads, like, you know, at gastrostomy weddings are like, just be nervous.


Nobody nobody likes making an announcement in the team is grand if you're rawn and ranting and raving before we get on the.


But like I think we're probably nearly the oldest on our dressing room, certainly around long enough to like creaking and t I'd hope that like the younger lads in our dressing room, if, say, one of them was gay, I love they were able to contact us and say here like you're all like what do you reckon I should do. And my advice would be like if they're good enough mates, yes. They'll have an inkling. Yeah.


You know that you will if you're if you're friends with someone and you're like, OK, well, like, you know, Jimmy isn't he hasn't been with any girls, I wonder, like, you know, and I think we probably see it like I think if he was my friend.


Well I think I know you don't always know.


You don't always know. But like I think I would openly ask, like, yeah. Like, you know, like fellows that's grand, like, you know what I mean. And I think I've asked people, yeah, yeah.


I was wrong. Yeah. But I was like we were out and I was his wingman and I was like, I just want to know what we're efficient for here.


Yeah. Yeah. But that's, that's the way it is. And that's I don't think that's a bad thing. I think it's like er you like, you know there's no water and I think, I think listening that's fucking gas nowadays. Like I said eighteen in nineteen year old that there like they're, they don't give a shit.




They really don't care anymore. Like whereas years ago those big hairy animals, you know mucking around restrooms are, are tough.


But I think that's the way you got that. You got your captain, you got one of your senior players and he can put it out for you.


Yeah. And then I think you want to be able to relax them a bit.


So let's say someone got a bad haircut on dress. There's going to be Sliger. Yeah. If you come out as gay. Yeah. You know, I think I always find that making fun of situations, but not being insulting to someone. Yeah. You can make light of a situation with like a nice remark that's quite funny, like comical. And lads can laugh and it relaxes everyone. You don't want someone saying something that's fucking insulting like. Yeah, and that's probably the word that you have to get around to dress.


But I think when somebody comes over first, they're probably going to be a bit sensitive for a while. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, I can take a while to grow into it. So to be able to slag and then to be able to give a backlash.


Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like there is like I'm like there will be some negative reaction I think from older people, like, you know, I remember doing a little Kuzak talking about some of the stuff that used to be created when he was in goals and stuff like that. And that shouldn't be tolerated. But like I think if that was happening, it is somebody on the sideline would call that person. I'd be like, shut up. Like, you know, get back to the Stone Age creep.


So, yeah, as regards the dynamic in the dressing room being different, like, I think some lads would probably have to alter their language. Yeah.


You know, like some lads would still talk and probably say things that are like twenty years ago were grand. But it is like you can't say that. Yeah. You know, so I do think you would have to watch yourself in that regard and just be educated as voice vote. But as regards the likes of showering together and all that and give a shit. No, it's actually I only thought about it today that I obviously like a lot of ads going after a game and we're together now because of it.


But yeah, we have it, like, I forgot like that women do the same to the morgue team and I'll be in the shower.


In a way, that's what you were thinking of. But then, like the male, the manager, if they have a male quarterback, is the lead researcher.


Yeah. You have to. That's the rule. Yeah. You have to have an if you're a male manager of ladies commodity, you have to have a woman on the management team that can go that goes in, tells you it's OK to community.


Just on language is a gassman obviously it's like LGBT.


Q So queer has come back and that is something that like I would never call someone queer, I call queer was like taboo.


And then I put on Netflix and it's like Queer Eye. Yeah. You know, I was taught my game, am I on about that. And he said in America apparently Queer wasn't used as much as it was in Ireland. OK, so you said when he was in primary school, people would be saying queer in a derogatory way.


Yeah. Whereas in America they obviously use the F word more. Yeah. So he said it was less of a reach to reclaim it. Yeah. In America was his take on things. But still I don't care if it's LGBTQ. Yeah. I wouldn't be comfortable going somewhere.


No, no, no, no I wouldn't like you.


Wouldn't you just want your chance if not for that. Yeah. You know what I mean. That's it. Like to me that that that words it's like the F word. Like me. Like taboo.


Yeah. But then. So you're playing the game now, right. Yeah. And like if you call a black person the N-word, it's a red card. Yeah. But what if you call a gay person to effort. Because the ref doesn't know at a glance that that person is Gayner. Yeah, yeah, tofor I get it. But then, like, you know, people call you fat bastard because you're fat. Yeah. Yes.


Like the referees are going to be all right. Listen, you can call him back. He's big boned.


What he is fat but like it's probably not to be like jump to conclusions but it's probably a bit tougher on the country than in the city.


Yeah. So so this guy does it. He's from a rural community. Oh, that is certainly tougher than living in a city where you can just kinda there's probably a gay scene, I guess more in the in the city I would say, than. Yeah. Gay bars. Yeah.


Yeah. You might have to set your Grindr radius before.


Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Living in Kilmichael or somewhere outside its radius, 90 miles trying to get a good looking lad. Do you think the gay there was enough to support the LGBT community.


I did all you have to ask them like they were in the pride parade is changing to like pride seems to be less of a protest and more of a party now. Yeah, because being gay is so acceptable now. Yeah.


It's very family orientated in much more of a celebration. So yeah, some people would, gay people would be annoyed by that because they say it should be just about gay people. But then I think it's good to be part of the way to get the wider community involved because then it's more inclusive. And sure, that's what everybody wants to be part of something. So everybody loves a party.


This is but sure. Like Tesco and Google and all have floats in it as well.


Like Airbnb, Aeroflot, Puru. Yeah.


It's like everybody have a floor and like anything like that little waterbeds like. Right. Sure.


Money probably sponsoring some aspect of it. I like. I get it. I guess so. I think there is an internal discussion in the gay and lesbian community about like Tarnoff.


They should be in this and other people are like Ashar.


It's all making it more welcoming, like, yeah, yeah. You know, but it is definitely easier I think are not easier, but it's more common for, like, lesbians to come out while playing professional sport. Yeah. Yeah. Like a professional woman's rugby player, tennis player or soccer player came out. It has been a shock and.


Yeah, but then they see that there are lots of Premier League footballers who are openly gay in their team, but not to the wider circle, to be fair to the fans, for the fans.


But they just don't want to be going out and have like a terrace of drunk fans or an abuse of them. Yeah, yeah.


But some fans that abuse you anyway, like at that level, I think that's part of a wider problem, though. What, like British soccer that, you know, you hear the stuff that blame black players get shouted at them and James McClean gets Adams. Yes. Yes.


Yeah, exactly. I think it's probably going to take one person who was incredibly strong and can take take the mantle of, like, being the first actively, you know, gay footballer in England. I think once one comes out, it really will really help everybody else.


They won't have to worry about it. It'll take a while, but it will become normal. Whereas, like, if they keep, you know, keep it keep it kind of like behind closed doors as such, it's never going to become normal. It's going to take on hold or someone like that. Yeah, it's going to take it.


It's probably going to take a big messy someone's going to come to believe. Don't know. Kuzak was openly gay when he was playing. Yeah. And like I thought was very well accepted after he'll tell you he got a, you know, abuse of different people who he knows but often is always open to him to come on here and talk about.


Yeah, but he's retired like he got ten years and there hasn't been any since.


Yeah. I suppose statistically there has to be someone. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There has to be someone. Surely there is. I mean but maybe they just want to be like they want to be like you man. Rodgers there's just like I just want to be a gay player. I don't want to be this. The GM defines you. Yeah.


Yeah. That's I guess that's fair enough that everybody everybody has that right.


But just like around the league, the same sex marriage referendum, talk about support for the gay community. That's I was walking up near the central bank in Dublin and there was a poster up for by one of the religious groups saying vote no. Yeah. And this group of five or six days ahead of me. And they were they looked like young offenders, to be sure.


I had haircuts in the Nike tracksuits and on one of them got off on the lads back and ripped down the vote no poster. And I was like, go on the fucking games.


I'm. Not lovely. Yeah, that is, I'm getting married to four, but I'm like in Dublin there's only one big gay bar, George.


And then you've like Pintubi and. Yeah, but it seems like there's less of an absolute need for gay bars.


And also, like, it's a grinder's helping with the hookups. Yeah.


So I've heard I've never been on that's that from what we hear. That's the one thing that we really do admire about the gay community is Grindr like it's like let's meet up and shag.


That's a debate that basically seems to be what what the least anecdotally like it's Grindr seems to be very loose, whereas like Tinder. So you want to go for coffee, you crave coffee.


What do you what are you saying? Like my friend, my brother's friend, Derek, he lives over and go and they he's absolute most crack or whatever, but he'd be meeting Ladds and Grindr and like he gets specific requests for them saying, like, can you dress up in the gay gear? They get the. Yeah. The socks, the shorts, the jersey, everything like all Mexicans got a.


Yeah, that's yeah, that's that's that's like like we've I'm sure we've all got friends who are gay, you know, and we know gay people and I think, like, I'm glad of that is so normal. But like, I think people feel the need to like we had a producer, we worked on a show one time and within one five minutes meeting them, he felt that he had to tell us he was gay. Yeah.


And I don't know, like what vibe we were given a scene, like, you know, he knew we weren't gay, but maybe he felt like we were such like lads that like Ecology's qualities that we weren't sensitive. Yeah. Or maybe he was afraid we were going to put our foot in.


It may be OK. I was like, wait a five minute chat with him both.


And he was like, you know, I just want to feel like I'm gay. And I feel like saying, listen, that we're after nine weeks for sweet, persistent air for five minutes. I don't care. Like, yeah, well, you will win on Sunday, sell you a little bit offended by that, that he felt that need that he had his lovely, lovely looking girl as well.


But no, I wasn't offended, but I just thought like, yeah, look, you know, we don't care, you know, whatever, like those 90s.


Yeah, yeah. Let's accept them anyway. I don't care. Yeah, but but then it is possible that we would have put our foot down so he could have saved us embarrassment there.


Look, I thought we were not sure if there is an exact way to go about it, but it's definitely less of a big deal.


Like more things in life. Yeah. Yeah.


It's a big deal to you and it's a big deal in your head. But once you have it done, you'll probably feel all the better for it.


Yeah, it's probably one of those things that you build up and build up, build up over years of like God, when's the perfect time. And it's like and there is no perfect time when you feel ready. But I think it won't be as bad as you think it's going to be.


Well, it depends on your partner. I get mine who's gay. And I said, do you ever get any guff? And he abused like and he's like, no, I'm six four two big fucker.


I don't look up at all. Yeah. He said like nobody really ever said a word to him, but he said, I have mates who are quite calm, quite flamboyant, and they would get like views of random hours on the street.


Oh yeah. And I was like why. And he's like, oh you know, it's like we're both gay. Yeah. What's the difference? Oh, I know.


I like I know somebody who is homophobic and they would be quite negative towards gay people. But then I also know that that person is a damaged person and they're taking their damage out and somebody else and they perceive someone who's a little bit different. They perceive them as being weak and therefore they're like an easy target to make. I'm going to shit and you make to make myself feel better about me. So, yeah, just ignore them, ignore the haters and just live your own life.


Yeah. So for a finish then what, what advice are we given to to this chap?


If you want to come on, a lot of people will have a line, they'll be like, I'll wait till I finish school or you know, whatever is something like that.


But this person, if you're ready to come out like that, like David Haffenreffer, he said when he told his team captain, a lot of lads in the team were like you.


We all kind of knew. Yeah.


So, well, if you're ready to tell people pull one or two of your mates aside and like you said, it'd be good team mates, they'll be accepted and it shouldn't be a problem.


Yeah, exactly. If you're ready, your team will be ready for you, you know what I mean? Particularly if you're a good footballer or if you're a Nazi, you put the ball over.


But we do know that stabs children and now you've got some pretty good. Yeah.


Look, I think times are changing. People are becoming more acceptable. It's it's not even an issue to me anymore. And I'm sure that going to be loads of people there to help.


And for anybody who who's like I recently watched Forbidden Games, which is a documentary on Netflix, on Justin Fashanu. And it was crazy like that.


That wasn't really tough back then, the 80s, 90s and stuff like that. Thank God we've moved on a bit from that. I'd like to think so.


His brother was a famous soccer player, John Fashanu.


Yeah. Who actually was willing to pay him more money like this, or the son who, like, were trying to run a story on just the fashion around him coming out. And he was going to do an interview and were given a big money and his brother offered him double the money. Yeah. To not do it. Yeah. Because there were almost a sham, they guess, as far as what you say. But look, times have changed.


Thank God I was a changed man. And if it was anybody who wants to get in touch, who wants to wants to come on.


Yeah. We would like to have someone on to be honest now. Yeah.


I think that I think this is definitely worth having again.


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Oh, he's a terrier named Kornel, a springer spaniel named Nicky English and a sheepdog called Michael Jackson.


It's time for Noal far along and it's time for Noles News.


No news. I mean, you know, I was out last week and they brought Maureen in to lure me back, and I tell you, you're a fair farahani.


Oh, thanks.


No, you got you bring your man back into.


Did you hear what he said last week? Oh, caramelizing Manley's. That's what I heard. Heads Leisz You notice Paddy Fong was in the mine diphthong. Now, last time she went, she broke out in a rash. She's allergic to Durrow. I was up all night rubbing leaves on that woman. You were telling fibs about me.


Listen, I'm just saying what I heard around the town you heard wrong Boso was wrong and I don't silage or.


Yeah. I got snared. What do I recommend Brennaman doing that bastard rapeseed or Jesus I can wanderin grandkid's rover. Oh granddaddies. Nor can I have some of your whiskey I think.


Get your own whiskey. I would focus.


You all love to talk shit. You don't have to buy liquor. Well I don't know.


Six twelve nine. What are my grandmother anyway. Why.


What do I have for you. That's news now because I was way I was straight doing change. I have a roundup of the news for you this week. Oh brilliant. So this is of course, North Furlong's round a town.


Oh yes. Now you know the law the pubs can't open unless acting as a restaurant. So the Bridgeboro has entered the food trade. Yes.


Twelve euro for a Snickers and tuna is doing sandwiches. Brilinta not really here.


The options are hanging, cheesed off cuts of beef, possibly tuna and rice.


Stackers include scampi, fries, marshmallows and darts.


Darts. Yeah, you can also get the chef's special chlamydia. Oh my God. A rough spot. A rough spot.


More news. Lovely. Una Hely has a new song. Yes, yes. It's about a breakup. Right. A lot of people saying it's about party funk.


Apparently, she has been spotted in the Astra going out to Bursley Road now unhatched tonight.


It OK, but that's what pop stars do. That is like rumors always denied more news.


Dwyre got a new dog. Brilliant.


You might have seen it on Twitter. This it is a Doberman.


He smokes Rothman's hates children and is named Rhoda's two confirmed kills ejecta.


And Lonergan's Ravi's fluffy hopped into Dwyer's back and rode out pulled that they were going mad, apparently to try lobed that rabbit. And I said, You're going to be Teres. So I caught him a new one. Yeah, yeah. It should be Rabbit Speedwell. And I want to trap. And I put the rabbit into fluffy pain and young lady came home and a horse driver bit him. It was a wild rabbit. Now the young lad had myxomatosis, but you can't win them all.


To me a rabbit is rabbit. Yeah, I didn't know the ones in the shop were different to the ones in the field, you know.


I mean, I'm sitting right now. Oh, OK.


I am more local news. Pat Halpin couldn't get into mass. That's right. Only around fifty people into the church. Apparently you have to book in your name and number beforehand. You won't get in because the Colvert Morvan was doing bouncer.


Now Ma loves good mass and he tried to bribe her.


He tried to slip her a flagons voucher and she said, Does your wife know you're giving vouchers to other women?


Maybe I should get fatter joy to announce it from the altar and she would to a dangerous, dangerous and dangerous bitch.


She'd be alright. Yeah, but she'd get a foot in trouble, you know. And Pat was sick. He was sick because you, Mr. Right. Good mass. He missed her. Right. Good. There was a letter from. Part of the Clintons I was class, this class, independent Greeks, it was a bit about your ship.


I said if I had a job afterwards, if I had a job, I was less often here, St. Paul and right into Corinthian's to do right back.


Dear St. Paul, please stop writing to us sincerely, Corinthian's, who, of course, went on to be one of the most successful soccer teams in Brazil, Corinthian's FC San Paolo.


That's them. Yeah, but you're saying Paul is really trying to get you home for lunch in a letter from St. Paul to Corinthians, Paul for the county. Any chance you get me on for first and more local news, there's a new Posman. All right, Teddy by hair, get it on him and apparently he has been delivering to the housewives of the parish and now I heard he nearly destroyed Susan Dions box. There was a considerable dent in after him.


Now, the next day he was evading her.


He didn't want to go up to the house. OK, so he left her delivery at the shop. Why didn't she walk in? I had to step in. It was going to be water. I said, Hey, Teddy, by get your hands off Susan's box, OK?


And she said, you only get one box. I said, Susan, you never said a truer words.


You have to mind that box.


And he said to me, he said, no, I'll have cameras box here. I said, Hey, put your hands up my wife's box. Are you and hair gel going up to the window.


But he has been transferred into town for the town to be more his kind. No. Well. Hmm. Well, bucks well in the box.


I don't know my wife's box in my I hopefully you can show me that.


Hey, I wouldn't be looking at Susan's box. No, no, no, no, no.


We wrapped up in here also on Monarchos. So someone said to me, Patsy was in the RAF patsy. Yeah. Heard I want to know and I would say in general but it why talk about it in. He was always buying rounds nadr and money and I mean you know me around his around a campfire.


I don't look at your Catherine to face it, he was the only man to go and I'm from Roberts. What a Thompson submachine gun would head up blow to shake help my dog out on it. But I don't know to where you're going. Oh Dick.


I said to him last year and he said Yes I don't think so. And I said, what about his? Pat is the kind of thing you should remember. And he said he was trying to remember anything. I worked with a lot of fellows over the years. He said I was in. Did you hear the brass band, the Scouts, the tidy towns, the Communist Party, the metalworkers union, the gun club to swingers club to dog and club, the tennis club?


They're kind of the same thing, but knocked around and I said, where's is coming out?


But he said, now somebody sheds. I rented out to a crowd and he was fairly sure they were a paramilitary organization, laundered money.


I chose not to do it in the moment. And he said, but sure, no shortcuts. He's taken a few bob out of it. I want to be and hold him. And I said, What do you tell them? I said, I told them to them. I said, the money.


I said in my machine goes, Well, it just goes to show you shouldn't be standing on this.


You can prove them. That's true. Yeah, that's true, Betsy. And rumors.


But I did hear I did hear that. Do not a happy pair. Yeah. You're better now.


I did hear they are members of al Qaeda.


That apparently is a fact that I highly doubt where a lot of people didn't know that. OK, it's an excuse that is breaking news.


Yeah, well, no, there could be Vean.


I think it's one of those groups that wanted an extremist group look anyway in order not to be masteries, not to be tried.


Yeah. I don't know. To even try. So there's something about food and taking their tops off anyway. I don't know. Just I wonder, I wonder what those crowds I, I give them a wide berth for really.


Thanks a million all.


It's good to have you back and good to have you back Maureen. Thank you.


It is looking when she takes the right look up. Yeah I agree. Yeah, yeah. Yeah that's it. Is it. Let's see what you do later.


I wait.


Cark on it. Pay me back. Good luck. No one will keep playing this game. So uh uh uh uh huh.


Her turn ons are dark hair, large biceps and Lance More is in the studio describing that fox. All right, what's your topic this week? OK, this is a controversial one that you're going to hate me for. Question for you. Would you be OK with your other half posting bikini pictures to social media? Oh, OK.


Now, I've done a bit of research into this kind of wondering what's the psychology behind posting those pictures types of pictures. So. A study conducted by Oregon State University has found that when it comes to Facebook photos, women who post sexy pictures are judged as less physically and socially attractive, as well as less competent by their female peers. The study, which was published in the Journal of Psychology of Popular Media Culture, is zeroed in on what researchers describe as a no win situation for young girls and women.


So my take on it is that like if a larger woman is to post pictures of her in bikini to Instagram, it's like you're so brave and great for your body confidence, whereas someone with, like, skinny figure is like, oh, yeah, it's just like trolling or Eutaw you.


Yeah, you're just you're just doing that for titillation like so and really. Yeah I think so.


Yeah. Maybe privately I think lot of the comments.


Oh yeah. Yeah. No, no. This is what women are saying behind the girls back like the like is come on you go on there like it.


But then they'll be saying to when they meet up you see that picture posted on Instagram like Jesus who does she think is gorgeous home.


Yeah. DM Me was probably what she actually wrote on the post. Yeah.


It's like she, she has an eating disorder or something like that, you know, her fat is cheating on her. So.


So and I think there's a couple of reasons why people do it. So maybe they want I don't think it's the healthiest way of getting attention or approval, but some girls like they like the likes and the like. The comments, they like getting extra followers. Some girls do it because they imitate what influencer is doing, like influencers who post bikini pictures because they're sat on like a fake tan brand or something like that. And then, you know, some girls just want to, you know, make their exes feel jealous or piss off their frenemies, you know?


So, yeah. So like, yeah, I probably fall into the category.


Oh, shit. Well, like, you know, it's funny. There was this girl who was not very nice to me in secondary school. And out of curiosity, I looked up her Facebook profile recently and she thought she was the bee's knees, in fact, in school, whereas I was like Sporty Spice wannabe didn't really care. Quite happy my racetrack's about things like where she was just like now she has like probably four kids by three different fathers and she's seriously Tarasov go.


So I was just like, oh yeah, Maura is back and she's bringing this spice up.


But it was just funny. It's funny how things change. So I was just like, oh, you don't actually I just kind of like felt sorry for her because she was probably just coming from a place of, you know, whatever back then, I don't know anyway. But I would think that you would need to be careful about what you post online, because the pictures I'd post in your twenties are very different to the pictures you'd post in your 30s when it comes to jobs and stuff like that.


So a lot of men might feel a little bit insecure about certain pictures that girls would post online.


So are you post online for like, I don't want to be looking at you like that.


So and yeah, I quite often think the girls don't realize that if you do post bikini picture online, like, you know, that's just the bikini picture. But there will be lads who wank off to that, which is a bit weird. Yeah.


So I know I've heard of this, so I'm wondering what's your advice and what do what's the male perspective on this? Um, would you ever ask girls to take down a picture online that you posted?


No, I would have to be fair. OK, um hm.


The reasons why girls forced them like to make an extra is very understandable. One.


Yeah. Other times, people are just saying, Johnny, we will never understand a girl looks well and wants to post a picture of her scantily clad looking well, and that's just something I think you will never fully understand the motivation first.


The same Eveillard posted a topless pic and had a girlfriend, you could argue, why is he doing that? Is he a personal trainer trying to get business or you know, if not, why? I mean, he had to say, look, I'm in great shape. I'm proud of it. And like a girl who's looking savage or thinks she is at least. Yeah. Can she post the bikini pic if she wants?


Yeah, she can. But I think some people will judge her. Yeah. Yeah. So you have to be aware of that and you have to have a thick enough skin to deal with that. I think so.


And but you're right and you're just like, I hate you more. It doesn't it doesn't really it doesn't affect me.


I'm looking off like, you know what I mean? And you won't let anybody even look at her profile. All right. But, like, I don't I don't understand it.


I really don't understand it. Like, it's and particularly with younger girls, you see it on Instagram. They're like 18, 19 posts and photos like I'm I have a sister who's 14.


I am dreading when she gets to that age. Yeah, absolutely. Because that seems to be the norm. You look at any girl's Instagram for and I guarantee you if they're in good enough, Nick, and they're not bad looking and 18, 19, there is definitely a photo of them in a bikini. Now, I can understand. Right. We're at the beach. There's a picture of us in her bikini to me, Grant. No issue with that.


Veronal, if you're at the beach, you're in good nick. That's great. I'm in my backyard in bikini cockamamy Owasso to the camera. Come look at me. Not so much like to me.


I don't get it. Yeah, I as Johnny said, I don't think I'll ever understand it. And like, if you're like girls who say, like I post that picture and I don't think Glads would be doing that to it. Yeah. Get a grip on don't try and get yourself like, oh no one's that NeuroSky.


Like nobody is that naive like. As a man that happens, trust me, every man, every man has done it, I would say every man under the age of 30.


Yeah, it's probably would you ever be worried that you'd accidentally likes another girl's bikini picture? Oh, yeah, I know. I wonder how you want to prop the phone up some more.


Well, we'd be wondering is if you like it and then immediately, unlike it, does it still show up asking for a friend, asking for a mate? The it's strange. I don't know, like two types.


Of course, there's only said if you find a lot, even like a particular fuckin stoner, like any girl who's like 18, 19 and Gonta profile, if she if she is the kind of person who posts some people don't like to post in their life. But if she's kind of person who posts as Alerta, there's almost a checklist. Yeah, I shouldn't have to scroll too far to see her cleavage. I'll scroll another inch and see her hours.


There will be a photo of her hiken. There'll be a photo of drinking gin. There's almost a checklist of photos. So if you were a young single man and you're like, oh, who's this girl? So it's nice to have a look at her profile. Does it checklist. I'll see if she's in good nick. Her arms photo can't be too far away now. It's like there's almost a checklist of the photos and we don't understand that we're a bit older like.


People want to fit in. Yeah, maybe, maybe it's just I don't think they feel like, well, everybody does it, so I'll do it. Yeah, yeah. But like, I think like I probably you probably appreciate a woman. If I was the only not only underneath, you probably appreciate a woman who had a bit more. Classes are left a bit to the imagination anyway. Yeah, I'm telling you, like you can you can go on Instagram now and you can have a look around the town that, like your girls or whatever in your area.


And you know exactly what they're what they're packaged like as such like like if a fella was putting up a photo of him topless and like, I tell you, underpants on them, you'd be nearly able to be like, yeah, OK, that's everything he's got to offer. Like, I do know that I would honestly think before foreston these things and yeah.


Particularly people who are in relationships.


Yeah. That's when it kinda blurs the lines for me a bit I think like. Yeah. Are you looking for attention. I put it this way.


I would think of someone differently. Unless I've met them, yeah, like if I met someone and then, like, looked at her, Instagram's like Jesus, yeah, I'd be like, well I know the sounds so I kind of get it a bit more. Whereas if I was to look at a profile and go fuck and then like me, Jarana probably have preconceived ideas in my head, which isn't right. I'm not saying that's right. Yeah, but I'm just saying it can happen.


Yeah. I think we should try this on. I took correspondence and I'd love to hear from girls who post bikini pictures and why they do it, what their feelings are, and then from lads who, you know, actively seek those type of pictures like, you know, I tell you, Neal, I hope you don't have any college to because you want to get a lot of correspondence on this one.


And we could talk about this for hours.


I will never I'll never understand and want to go with, you know, and there's like a lot to be said.


I'm like, well, I'm trying to be a model or I'm hoping some well, someone's going to give me free shit.


But there's a wider question of why do people want more followers?


Yeah, just like, yeah, it is.


It's a very it is the social esteem or social self-esteem thing. I think, you know, if your friend like I have one friend and she commented at Christmas about the number of Instagram followers I had, she's like, oh, you're like a semi influencer now. It's like I'm not that type of person at all. Like, you know, I was a bit taken aback by that. I was like, why would you even I never even think to go look at one of my friends.


No, they're followers like, you know, but it's yeah, she was a bit insecure in herself.


And I was just some people are into that. Yeah. I gibber here like younger people.


More people like under 20 will be like knowing that, oh, they must have fallen out with more. They didn't like Morris.


Sort of like an etiquette to go, oh, did you hear such a Dutch person on followed them.


Ah on like that for oh for for teenagers and you know going to college people younger to see a serious like if I fight any advice, anyone, anyone's going to pay less attention socially like it's gas.


People messaged me to hold him just being like you never do that in this forum. Are you all right.


Yeah, well I have like I'm busy, like I have a normal life. So I don't, you know, spend all my time trying to trying to think of stuff to do or whatever, like I probably should pay more attention to everyone is different.


Some people prioritize their Instagram. But just if it's not to do with your career, obviously the kind of the quality of the personal brand is back. Now, if you think of like the ten biggest companies in the world, you could probably name their CEO like, which wasn't always the case. But now people have a personal brand and they're like, well, I might be going for a job. And yeah, yeah, it's kind of back in fashion.


But like, I don't understand that if we weren't doing this.


Why would you want your followers and any young lady listening if you have two or three thousand followers, you know, congrats, you're good luck and don't read any more into us?


Yeah, I'd prefer to have four or five close friends than he tells his followers. It's much more important in life as you as you get older and enjoy.


Don't let it get to your head like, oh no, I've got followers. I should post bikini pics because that's what people would followers do. Yeah. Don't let it get to you. It's just congrats. Goodlooking. Well done lads. Are you've got good genes or you know there's more to it than just genetics.


But just to get back to your question, Morra, and wrap this up, I'd never tell my daughter half platypus or what not to post or what away or not where. I think that's very controlling. I'd never do that.


I would like I'd like to think that she that she'd have enough cop on of, like, what's acceptable, what's not exactly.


You know what I mean. Yeah, I'm nearly 30. Like, I'm twenty nine. She's very tolerant of the stuff you get up to.


So, you know, like I tell you, do you know topless photos of me.


I can assure you I wouldn't ordinarily bother me, but it depends on. It's like a comment, it depends on the intent. Mm, very true. Yeah, pull my hair out.


No, we're going to get some correspondence, send it to me and say, give us your thoughts. This is a hot topic. Thanks, Margita.


Don't forget to read, review and tell your friends about a two Gianni's podcast.


You can use the hashtag to Johnnys podcast, the number two Gianni's pod to spread the good word. You can also follow us on Instagram at the two Gianni's. And if you want to send us any correspondence or suggest future topics or have your say on the podcast, you can email us a podcast at the two Johnnys dot, i.e. now finally, it's your time and time. Don't forget your dirt. This week is brought to you by the good people at 48 they are change, not mobile, and you can find out how on forty three.


And the best news is they're given five lucky listeners each week. The chance to win a six months free 40 year mobile seem to be a good chance to win an all you have to do is send in your report using the hashtag UAT 48. Why you are ready for it on any of your favorite social media platforms Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, whatever. Just hashtag your first year and you'll be in the hat. Just tell us what you're here to tell us what's good in your life.


Johnny B..


Quiet, lads. I've got a pint glass here that I'm drinking from. And on the pint glass, there is a little thing that says I am in a square, right. Little rectangle. And this one says M10. You know what that means? No manufacturing in 2010. Wow.


So if you have a point that's now it's not on every point, but it's definitely on Guinness and a lot of the other ones.


And there's a little rectangle, it says pint and it's got the C E sign and then it's got M10, which means it's manufactured in 2010.


So that's what the writing on the side of a pint of Guinness means.


And I just learned that I thought it was every day, man, I get educated on this podcast. But somebody was saying to me like that they like that a pint glass is older because they reckon that the glass on the inside from being constantly used and cleaned, especially if pubs had the kind of spinny thing. Yeah. That it reoffends the inside of the glass and that the Guinness sticks to the inside of the glass better.


And, you know, like this, you actually make me want to so bad, you know, all these urban legends about like a pint now from a man, you know, with only one album he pulls whatever you know and what noise pulls the best pint like.


So they say that they're off glass with a nice pint of Guinness will.


We found out the hard way when we've got a tap in recently that don't wash your glasses in like, you know, washing up.


Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.


All that stuff. So you go it all helps.


I've got a good week all around for me. Liverpool lift into the premiership is one thing. Also there's a new show out and Sky is called In the Long Run. Idris Elba. Sure, it's a comedy and it's third series dropped on Sky this week. And if you haven't seen it, the three series and they're all half an hour. Nice, easy watch. It's funny. Check that out. That would be York and two oh two in the minor championship.


Just probably you know, I probably saw a hat in the ring for of intercounty jobs.


Those teams are going incredibly well. We won the other night.


Last minute ball dropped in Internet like we won by a point with a goal in the last minute. I am nine years transfer playing with care and it's probably the second best feeling I've ever had.


I rang him afterwards. He thought I was crazy. All right.


I know that, Johnny. I was like, wait a minute. I was driving a car home. I the music player, I had to remind myself, you know, wasn't a semifinal. And we still still have a lot to achieve, but some feelings, some crack, something we don't like.


Like, I would have never got a chance to do this, but for a lockdown, which isn't, you know, great, but still nonetheless enjoying it. Have you got dirt or are you quite happy with everything?


Had a great year and you just knocked it out of my head. So yeah, we're playing a game this weekend. Morar seven pm Sunday evening.


I know it's, it's a disgrace. It's outrageous. Yeah. Yeah. It's poor, poor, poor tameness.


Now I know, I understand that there is a premium on pitch space and the availability referees with a lot of games but just look after care, don't care about anyone else on Saturdays and Sundays.


Now we've got my mantra and have a drink.


Um, my daughter the week is I went shopping the other day and here's the team. Is it mandatory to wear face masks? But is it the law they say we should wear? But is it the law? And I've started wearing tonight. Yeah.


So it's mandatory and public transport. We transferred to me. It should be mandatory if you're going into an indoor space, like a shopping centre or whatever. So I was in local supermarket during the week. All the staff were wearing masks. Yeah. And nearly all the customers are seen account of one woman who wasn't wearing in the shop.


And I felt like an old like trying the mask off. We're all doing their. Someone in behind the butcher counter sweating to death with a mask on, the least you can do is for 10 minutes or in her short on, maybe she forgot. Yeah. I would also say supermarkets should have like disposable mass there as well. So there should be no answer.


I just think just wearing a mask is not for that long. Just do it. Get into the habit, have one indicator, just leave it in your car yet and you won't forget them, ok?


It was just annoying me. I swear to God, if we go back a few years, I'll lose my mind. Well, there's other aspects as well as masks. Yeah, I know. I was happy where I wore mine to the supermarket today because it was in my rough clothes. I was in my dirty clothes that you take.


You take the mic with your clothes. Oh.


So I put on makeup and like my mask and I was happy to stare at me like no one cut me. I was the first time, like I had put on the mask to go in somewhere. Like I obviously worn a mask in, in places really briefly. But like I bought this new nice Mazda has like a Velcro tie on the back and it gets big enough.


York takes what most to me first. And then I went in and like went in to where I used to work and I was like, stick them up I thought was great.


I'm going to be who's going to hold up? It's all up there.


Did they didn't see the funny side.


But what I did and just credit one later scene in local supermarket who had a full on scarf tied around his face, but he was abandoned and just dangling down at the backlot.


Got to make the most of it. There you go. Wear your mask. Thanks a million to everyone.


Will be back next week. Same time, same channel more. Great to have you here. Thank you.


That's great. Thank you. Weird I haven't seen in so long. Like we've completely changed. Yeah. So for me. Johnny Cmax for me. Johnny B from Ima. See you next week.


Good luck.


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