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This is the eleventh hour. Sure, with this still got Sparkasse. Before we get to Greg, I have an update on my artisanal CHIVA gift. Oh, Jesus.
So I had someone very nice, a very nice customer service person from Chevette Dotcom. This is not a personal endorsement. This is just appropriate context. And I find it funny that it's just directly chiva dotcom, that there is a huge snowstorm in the Northeast. And I paid for overnight shipping and I got a call on Monday saying, and sorry, the snowstorm, your overnight shipping isn't going to get there until Thursday. I'm like, well, thank you very much.
You have a very kind disposition, but that's not overnight. In fact, there have already been two nights since I've placed this order.
So and time is of the essence as we all learn for the reasons you sending the gift really is a symbol for time is of the essence. It's all fleeting. It's all final.
So what are we going to do here? Use a very nice person, very nice person. And he's like, well, I'm not really authorized to give refunds. I'm like, I don't want to refund on the whole thing. I just want a refund on the overnight because I was like thirty five dollars. So look, something needs to be done here. Oblon gives me a call two hours later. Now, I still have to pay the overnight shipping, but he really up sold me on the fact that now my artisanal pretzel chiva package has been upgraded to the deluxe artist.
Wait a minute. It's getting there many days late after the ships get in there today. But the ship is over. You waive the well, the shipping chiva for, what, seven days? Yeah, the ship is not over.
So this Gaudium, they're still in there, so it's going to still get there on time to get there on time. Did you get the thirty five dollars waived and you get an upgrade.
No, no, no, no. So they're upgraded you without giving it. Without giving you about the thirty five bucks. Who got this call. You got to get it.
But I have to get you guys to call as you and record it as he tries to get you more money for your pretz.
I kind of thought that this was a win because they've upgraded the artisanal package. This is from what I've been told, a twenty five dollar value on my thirty five dollars shipping. It's a net it's a net negative 10. But you know what? Diamond hands.
Right? But my dad still doesn't have it. It's getting there today. I've been assured because this ship. But it's coming from New York. It's coming from Miami. He texted me already today saying he didn't get it yet.
Not I'm not good. You should have a satellite office in South Florida if you're if you're chiva dotcom is all I'm saying. Chiva Dotcom should absolutely have a factory somewhere in Palm Beach.
Yeah. Be right. Why why is it dotcom not headquartered here is because in the dotcom age you don't have to have a headquarter.
Everybody's a P.O. box and this person wasn't an executive. But I'm like, if you have a suggestion box, I would like to recommend that chiva dot com had a South Florida office.
It would be a hit man. So Greg Cody of the Miami Herald, you're going to have to forgive us because we have never felt further. This is a weird thing that's happening inside of Mr. Guy for years at ESPN. All I did was stomp around. I don't want to be a part of radio row. I don't want to be a part of the Super Bowl. But I want so much normal in a pandemic. I want something that feels like the show.
I want a phone line that works. I want engineers. I'm not paying. I want somebody to reach out and make us feel like we're close to Super Bowl week because we feel totally untethered. I can't believe I'm saying it. I can't believe I had to get out of ESPN in order to long for radio row. But we feel totally detached from everything that's happening. Not just this week in Tampa, the Super Bowl football. We can't even get attached to the shipping container.
We're calling the shipping container by landline like it on a telephone like we have never been this we've never been this large is a show and we have never been this untethered from any single thing that has to do with doing our show, including getting paid for doing it, because now severance is running out for everybody and the ship is is leaking holes and we can't even get up and running Internet today. Yeah, it was very exciting at the beginning. I'm starting to get nervous, but you miss radio row.
You never even been there. How could you understand what I'm saying? Correct. You understand it's not really radio row. I miss the ability to just occasionally talk to a football voice and have ten minutes of ah, what's the most important thing that that you know, that the Chiefs or the Bucs have to do to win the Super Bowl? Listen, I get it. Last year, just a year ago, me and Billy, this week we're sitting next to Derrick Henry.
We are far away, right in a year. A lot has changed. Just a year ago, Chris Cody was dressed as a battery and we were flaunting behind the on the set of first take the fact that the Clevelanders are house and now the Cleveland is our house. But it feels like our house has been left behind. Feels like our house is totally vacated. It's Whittingham. He's sad. It's Mike who's talking to engineers. It's us calling Greg Cody right now for a back in my day.
This is going to be like walkie talkie radio in the 50s right now. Well, give Cody some credit.
He is a national football voice. I mean, he is great, Cody. He's a local and he's closer to the Super Bowl right now than we are. This does not in any way. If you've been listening to our show, this feels like Super Bowl week now because the frenzy of Super Bowl week for us has always been where the show that doesn't care about the Super Bowl, everything around us cares about the Super Bowl. We don't have to talk to anybody.
We could just fool around over here and hopefully no one to notice. But we've lost the entire structure of what it is that we used to exist inside of.
Now, no Internet. That's certainly a shock to the system. But I think your timelines might be screwed up again, because before the pandemic, before we knew Zoome was a thing. Everyone that used to guest on this show, this is wild would have to sit by a phone and wait for a call. And that's what we got going on right here. Honestly, things are going way too well for our show.
We had a twitch that went seamlessly, that every day now people are the entitled people in our group are demanding. And every day twitch is if they don't, they don't understand at all what what the infrastructure here required.
Well, on a permanent basis, I guess it's expensive enough to do that just once. But we were the marching band in nowhere. And then in free agency, as this pirate ship, we were a marching band to the moon, so now we've bottomed out, technology has failed us and we're the lovable underdogs again, I think.
But if you want to football, I mean, we don't need to be at ESPN to get a football voice. I can get you Chris Sims. I can get you my goal. The right wing go with Sean Salisbury. That's what I.
That's not what I miss. I don't miss. You want to mix it up, Brian Westbrook. I don't.
Yeah. Good God. Isn't that the sports radio list. That's good God. So we're going to go through that. Oh no. We're going to find Laurence Maroney. He's going to be the only Brian Westbrook. We're going to find a. Speaking of which, Greg Codi of the Miami Herald is with us now by phone as we try to do some semblance of the show, normally he's saying by phone like no one talks. This is the ridiculous part about what we're doing.
Greg Greg Cody's used to be at the height of entertainment. Greg Cody is here. He sits in the box and gets his face on television. He plugs his podcast. Tuesdays are a great joy for Greg Cody. He's entitled. He believes he deserves them. He wants to know when he's going to start getting paid for them. He wants the only one he wants to be. The only one around here being paid right now is we work all for free during a startup.
Greg Cody joining us in the UNsponsored performance line. I mean, listen, he's got a day off today. He's got it now, but he's not excited. You'd be excited with a day off, but you weirdly keep coming in anyway because it's healing for you. And Greg Cody doesn't actually want the day off. He wants the day to complain about why he's not being paid to do his back in my day and to promote his podcast and his fantasy league, Gallas.
So let's see how much Greg Cody, we could stick in as a single phone segment here by beginning with the back in my day. How do you feel about it, Greg? Do you feel strongly about it?
Confidence shaken a little bit. But you know, I'm cutting through it, man. All right. I'm plowing forward. All right.
We are ready to do it. Give him his imaging, please. And now it is time to take a trip down memory lane. Here's your guy, Greg Cody with Back in My Day. Life coaches, whatever happened to self-sufficiency, the very basic idea that everyone was their own head coach in the game of life.
Now, apparently many of us require a coaching staff to help us navigate the simple art of simply living life coaches, personal trainers, personal chefs, wellness coaches, when getting from one week to the next, become akin to traversing the Grand Canyon on a tightrope. Why do we need a personal guru on call to guide us with advice once considered is plain common sense. Now, look, don't get me wrong, I certainly am not against people seeking help.
If they actually needed physical help from doctors, mental help from therapists. Go for it. Do all the healing you require. But this wellness obsession invites proper ridicule. And so Fran Lebowitz does so in the new documentary series Pretend It's a City on Netflix, as she puts it. People carrying around yoga mats is a problem. You see, people wear Fitbit and Google watches with health tracking stats on their smartphones, wearable technology to monitor fitness levels, spas, yoga, juice bars, massage, meditation.
God, we pamper ourselves as a life coach guides us at 50 bucks an hour. No wonder wild animals out there all on their own. No help hate us. Do you know my mother was born on a kitchen table.
My dad swallowed with no water. It wasn't that long ago.
Well, it was unheard of. Granted, folks live a lot longer now. But that's information, common sense, science and evolution doing that, not a wellness coach.
I'm looking at a TV ad the other night for one of those trendy, pricey stationary bike so mesmerized, easily swayed millennials. I love the metaphor of exercise on a treadmill of literally running continuously in place and getting nowhere.
So in the video, the young sweating woman on the treadmill is being exhausted by a virtual personal trainer on a video screen, exhorting her to climb harder, work harder, give more. Same with that new gimmicky thing where you basically watch yourself exercising in a fifteen hundred dollar mirror, shadow boxing or doing squats while the small coach in the mirror inspires you on your shoulder like a guardian angel. This is the perfect toy for the fitness obsessed being able to see themselves in action as they aggressively pursue wellness.
You really need a magic watch on your wrist or a virtual trainer to help inspire you, because if they aren't there, you might just say, oh the hell with it, and collapse into a gallon of chocolate ice cream people. As Fran Lebowitz says, your bad habits might kill you, but your good habits won't save you. Hey, I'm a life coach. I don't smoke cigarettes, have an occasional salad, don't weigh three hundred and forty pounds.
They're I the rest of the day off and enjoy your life. Oh, great. Kodiak's all right.
Just excellent background. What got you. My mom was born in the kitchen, I'll tell you. Yes. I think that one got us all and we will as some follow up questions there. But I believe that what got me was the sentence before that. Greg, can you just reread the sentence before my mom was born on the kitchen table?
She was, by the way. That's the truth. Let me look it up here. Hang on. Oh, no wonder wild animals out there all on their own. No help.
I don't believe that's true. I don't know.
These animals hate us, but you sound well. You sound awful. You sound terrible. It was great. It was legitimately great. We were delighted to hear it. It sounded quoting Fran Lebowitz is wonderful because these have an Andy Rooney quality to them where it's just an old man yelling as he descends into a lack of health. But you do.
You live with small windows. Small windows. Here I go. Yes, I was he better?
He better on the phone is natural environment. We're fine. We found a way to use CODI correctly. We could do a great. Sure. Cody this way. I'd love to hear a little update because the reason you're on the show is just because I enjoyed my phone calls with him. He's hysterical on the phone.
He speaks on the radio right now for a weekly update on our favorite team, Rik's Lowballs. Here is their head coach and president of football operations, Rick Cody Woo!
He's like Nick Foles, he's better coming off the bench. Amazing.
It's not even a phone. I'm on a tin can with a string. Listen, we just had the FBI gala.
Speaking of great love of the FBI, Gaila was this past weekend. And you can hear all about it on the new great Koti Show.
Oh, for the Love of God, which also includes a Super Bowl preview in which Ron McGill talks about Gote. But the fire. Golo, fantastic. It was fantastic. We honored Dick's Roughriders. It was the new champion. I mean, it was just it was truly a gala in every sense of the word. All right.
You were dressed up a lot more than usual. I commented to your son yesterday that it was real interesting to see how that production value went up. And he said there were resources. Now that you are strictly promoting your podcast where all the good from the attention goes straight into Greg Cody. It was perfect funding your narcissism.
Well, you know, this was history in the making because for the first time, the FBI, Gaila was actually sponsored by the Great Kotoko podcast. So we had our gala site, a.k.a. my living room.
We actually had signage, Greg codicils signage, as you would see professionally around the stadium and some really fantastic LSD.
Wait a minute. What did you make of money laundering? Are you doing the great comedy show featuring Greg Cody is at a business expense. I'm going to Kinko's the night I go funding the night of the gala. Is it a business expense?
Well, the signage consisted of a printout of our show logo, but it was in black and white because I ran out of color.
You know, he's the greatest I can. And we've got to do this on the phone with him all the time. So what else was there to tell us more about the Gaila and the sad parts of the gala and how embarrassed your sons are because they are now adults and you are still treating them as if they haven't grown at all since they were 13?
That's right. Well, the fun thing about the gala is the heckling aspect, because Michael and Christopher are just merciless and I can't stop from laughing.
And at one point I'm in the middle of a heart. I'm in the middle of a heartfelt speech about the importance of the FBI in all our lives. And I hear Michael murmur loudly, Mom, wake up, you know, just things like that. It's it's sad and funny at the same part. At the same time, you know, it's it's great.
And it's all on the great comedy show podcast where you do your body.
I mean, you have never sounded you don't sound great, but you have never been so funny. I've never been so funny and never been so funny. Do you have a soup of the day?
I want more. We want more comedy. Let's test the boundaries on this and see if he could do off the top of his head not written a soup of the day of some sort just to see if he is. Indeed, we have found the secret wheelhouse for Greg Cody following his crime. Greg Cody, just give him a landline. But let's do that next, Mike. And let's also call Chris because I want to get more details on the FBI gala.
So let's stop right here and call Chris Cody and bring him in because I need more detail.
The 55 big game is this weekend, 55, a game this big deserves a big prize, not just some trophy to finish off the football season. Dragging Sportsbook, America's top rated sports book app is giving all players a no brainer of an offer to celebrate football's finale. Drapkin Sportsbook is doubling your money if a touchdown, who scored in the big game? That's right. All it takes is for one touchdown to be scored Sunday night and boom, your money is doubled.
Sounds like a no brainer. As if this game wasn't enough reason the party would double the cash you'll be celebrating until next season. Don't forget about draft games. Big game prediction challenge with up to 55 million dollars in total prizes up for grabs and instant prizes for everyone who enters the contest, rankings is paid out over seven million dollars to which players since 2012. So they know a thing or two about big paydays. Download the draft King Sportsbook app now use promo code Dan to get a shot at doubling your money.
If a touchdown is scored in Sunday's game, that's promo code dead to get a shot at doubling your money during Sunday night's season finale. Only at Drapkin Sportsbook must be twenty one or older New Jersey, Indiana or Colorado. Only restrictions apply to draft Kings Dotcoms. Prediction Dash Challenge Dash DFS for details. Gambling problem. Call one 800 gambler or in Indiana one 800 nine with it or in Colorado one 800 522 4700.
All right, Chris Cody, on a day that has been weird because we're in the studio, we can't see anybody. We're just calling people on the phone and trying to recreate our show through tin cans, walkie talkies. And Greg Cody's on a heater right now. So we're going to ride this heater. We're going to keep throwing him the ball in the post and bring in his son, Chris Cody, because yesterday I threw in his lap. You may have been listening to God take up very little help on the Popeye Galla.
I don't know if Chris Coatis rattled because Whittingham has been out for outperforming him lately. But what's going on? But Chris is not quite himself.
No. Now Lefko has issues with him and Chris is all over.
No, Chris Cody, you didn't actually hear it because you weren't here to hear it. You would have been shocked and mortified. But Lefko did a wrestling promo at your expense, and he's going on tonight to do a show that is rocketing him into superstardom in broadcasting. And he said he's going to stare into the camera and he's going to be thinking of you in the ways to bury you because you don't think he's someone who would take notes to learn about Ernie Johnson, to find out how to be a great professional broadcaster.
You're Learning Tree is Stu Godse and Greg Cody. And so we arrive in a place where you were snickering with your brother during the FBI gala as your father, as your father rockets to superstardom with his own promotion. Tell me how it came to be that the Greg Cody show featuring Greg Cody sponsored the Popeye gala and how much money laundering is involved there and how sad this ceremony was that you and your brother were making fun of?
Oh, it was incredibly sad. And I found out that Greg Kodjoe is sponsoring the gala. When my dad told me so, that's how I found out that. And it was an epic night. I don't know, like what's what's where snickering at him because we love him and we're we're a family that's bonded together and, you know, like, you can't break us apart. And by the way, did Lefko show you guys those notes? I bet he did.
No, it's all them. Take a picture not. We're waiting to see that. We're going to put that on social media and escalate the beef as Greg. Greg, are you okay? Yeah. Yeah. Are you petering out? You're petering out after you're back in my day.
No, the problem is, you know, the phone doesn't have a mute button like Zoom. So I can't when I'm not even to clear my throat, all I can do is extend my arm and hope that it's muffled.
You know, it actually your phone does have a mute button.
Yeah, it does. It does. And you don't. And you don't use the zoom you. But well, let me look at my phone and I'm going to try.
Yeah, I see it. I'm going to get my waiting. I'm going to try and get a chuckle again like I just saw them even.
Yeah. Getting a call. All right. My phone's. Oh God. I see.
Who's calling, right. Yeah. Okay, I get it. Yeah. Leveton Enterprises who refer to themselves as an enterprise.
You missed a great opportunity when you were looking for the mute button.
This is not a joke, but it's not quite that funny. Enterprise is showing up on your caller, right?
For Gragg, you better have better health benefits.
You better enterprises and some health benefits go to that cause lingering for three, three years. I know, but it's better now.
It really is. Well, Chris. How much laughing were you guys doing at your dad? A lot I mean, that's the yearly tradition, I mean, he I don't I can't get a read on him on how he feels about the laughter because it would just be the most boring thing ever if it was just him talking like we make it exciting like that. Do you really get that offended by a mocking you? No, in fact, some of it is so funny that I that I have to go out of character as commissioner and I start laughing like when mom when Michael says, mom, wake up as if she's sleeping during my speech.
And then there was one time that. What were you saying? Making fun of the pants I was wearing or something. Well, you had the baggy dress pants on that I've ever seen. Like, I got to take a picture of these baggy dress pants he was wearing. Like, I don't know if this is formal wear for the commissioner.
Correct? Formal wear for the commissioner. It's formalwear. I wear, you know, wingtip shoes and the black dress jeans. You're walking here.
You're walking across a floor that has been there for how long? A carpet that has been there for how long?
Well, it's a it's wood, not carpet. All right. So you're walking across wood that's been there for how long? Oh, gosh. I mean, you know, a dozen years or more. OK, and you're walking across this wearing your finest formal wear and it is baggy and your goal is to stay in character all night as the commissioner. Right. You never want to fall out of character, correct?
Yes, that's correct. Because it's a natural role I'm playing. You know, I don't even know if character is the right word. I mean, I am the FBI commissioner. You know, the only time I have to change character is when I make a speech as Gregs lowballs and we know you know, at which point he literally will say, and now Greg Slowpokes.
And then he'll walk five steps, know he introduces himself. Oh, no, I love you so much.
We recreate that. Please. I'd like to hear that. Greg, how does that end up sounding as your family hostages in this situation, basically humouring the old coughing man as as your family endures this? Can you just take us through a little recreation? I'm sure they can get the whole thing on Greg Cody's podcast featuring Greg Cody. But a little recreation here by way of promotional. Do you have a clip? Do you have a clip? Christopher might be able to produce that for you.
I don't think is any that I can send you that clip in like I was more asked to do it.
I was more asking, like a late night show, like, you don't really need to give me the clip.
Just actually, I think I would like to clip. Send me the clip. Wait. Damn it. I don't have email. Exactly. I just want to hear Greg do it. Greg, can you introduce yourself like you were at the gala?
Yeah, well, the funniest thing was I previously recorded myself introducing myself, and it came out like real skinny. So on a recording to begin the Gaila, you you hear me saying, ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the FBI commissioner, Greg Cody. And then there's a pause and I walk up to the podium.
So it's weird. Wait a minute. Hold on, hold on. Hold on. That's not you introducing you. That's a recording of you introducing you.
Yes, that's right. And I did it on my iPhone voice memo.
So it came off like really and like I was speaking in a barrel just at the podium holding the phone up that said, ladies and gentlemen, the FBI commissioner, right?
That's right. And then he saunters off.
So wait a minute, then. Do you leave? Are you saying you're standing there holding the phone? Do you show up then or were you behind a curtain or something?
Hold on. My dad's confusing two things. The thing where he holds up his phone is at the start of the entire ceremony. So, like ladies and gentlemen, the FBI commissioner, Greg Cody, that's done on his phone, which he's holding there awkwardly standing. Right. And then when we get to time for the speeches for every team, he's the commissioner up there. And it's time to introduce Greg glovebox. And that is when he take six steps to the right, turns around and comes back to the stage.
OK, so we got it. Very well done, Chris. So, Greg, we watch you as commissioner, introducing yourself, calling yourself up to the podium, and then thank yourself as yourself thanking the commissioner.
Right. OK, OK. As the commissioner, I'm going and tied for second place this season.
He's the all time FBI champion with nine championships, four in the modern era of bills reigned in.
Nineteen seventy seventy three. Seventy five seventy eight, 2006, 2011, 13, 18 and 19.
Please welcome Gregs Lovo and then I step away to applause. I come up to the podium was there.
Applause and hold on. You come up to the podium and say, what do you say? Thank you Commissioner. You change your voice, right?
No, actually my voice does change a little bit. I think as commissioner, my voice wants to be a little more stately, a little more Augusts and has great logos.
It's pretty much just me.
But, you know, I'm conveying my disappointment. I had one, two years in a row prior to this season. No one's ever done the trifecta. So the odds were against me, you know?
So I just discussed things like that in my speech.
So there's speeches for everyone who finishes their four people, five people in the fantasy league.
Five there's there's six people. We do them in inverse order. So whoever finished sixth, who happens to be Chris Cody speaks first and then the champion speaks.
God, I want to be invited next year if possible. There this is the best you've ever been like.
Are you ready for super the day that we got to do a soup of the day with him? But before we do that, real quick, Chris, your wife is also there are six people in the FBI fantasy Lobo's draft, but your wife is there reluctantly. Correct. So what is her speech like?
It's funny because she actually I think because she's not you know, my mom's been with him forever. We're like, you know, his actual kids. So she buys into it actually more than anybody. She plays along like she kind of winked at me and my brother, like, does it sarcastically. But she'll say all the things that actually supports my dad, even though she's secretly mocking Good Wife.
Good. Excellent work by your wife. All right. Let's push our luck here with Greg Cody. We're going to wing it a freestyle soup of the day out of nowhere.
Put on your aprons, boys. It's time to step into the kitchen. Here is our head chef, Brett Cody, with his the this I mean, it is the soup of the day, like fifteen minutes ago out of nowhere.
I mean, I should have said nowhere better than I just did to either. I should have been a professional. I was trying to nail the dismount with my enthusiasm. Doing this can radio we're doing today. I'm so excited that Greg Cody has been good for three. Like what feels like we're we're at the end of a second segment getting this is what getting help from Greg Cody feels. He's been good at it, no, we're let's go, Greg.
Well, is it a suit, is it a stew? And it may be controversial, but it comes with a spoon. So we're calling it a soup.
It's what you can't pronounce, but you want to eat.
It's cocoa vine. That's right. A French delicacy. The chicken is raised in the burgundy wine with pork fat and mushrooms and garlic. It's braised long and slow. The wine burns out, but the flavor stays. The chicken is beautiful.
It's fall apart tender in this rich, deep colored broth and the aroma, the aroma.
And you dig in, you take a spoonful, get a little chicken on that spoon, get a mushroom on that spoon, bring it to your mouth.
Your mouth goes agape. You weirdly sensual.
It's it's making me uncomfortable knowing that I know it's making me uncomfortable. The sounds he's making are deeply uncomfortable. Was anyone out of line creeped out by the sensuality, the baby. How do you say baby in French. I do say but stuff in French.
Baby, baby. Greg, thank you. Your best performance in years. Great song. Excellent work, both of you. Next week, next week unpaid. We will call you by phone. We don't need to do this with you. We've been doing it wrong for many years here. Don't come into the studio. Just call us and be confident. Greg Codi Show featuring Greg Cody or with Greg Cody. What's the name of the podcast?
The Great Cody Show with Greg Cody. And if you want more of the FBI, Gaila this is your pod.
Chris, anything else we need to know? We're going to put that clip in. What else do we need to know that we missed out on the Gaila because there's not enough information from this that we can mind for the funny. I mean, Uncle Dick makes his speech, you don't want to miss that. OK, Uncle Dex Roughriders, baby, see you later. Cody's later.