This is the down labor part, sure, we've still got Sparkasse. And wants to buy printers for all the listeners, tweet in today at Levon's Arja, I just if we're going to start taking gifts from listeners and actually including them in the community, that way, we should probably do it in a way that is most spiritual and connected. Like, that's a really cool gesture. Why would they buy us a printer? Because I've just been asking for us to have sold just a few more resources so that somebody could get us a printer.

Well, you've mentioned that there's no printer for some time now, so a listener took it upon themselves to buy a printer. Now, Chris then says, what else do we need? Send it to us. And I would say you need to be very careful, because I I came up with this idea in my head a while ago, and I mentioned it one day, I think on the local power where I don't know if you guys remember a long time ago, probably like 10, 15 years ago, there was this viral thing.

It was called like one red paperclip dotcom or something like that, right. Where this guy started with a paper clip and then his goal was to get a house. So he just kept bartering with people his way up. So he went like Paperclip. And then the person would make him an offer that he had somehow got to like a jet ski. And then he traded like a jet ski for this and that until he ended up with a house.

Right. So I came up with this idea where I just wanted to put out there, I want to be a millionaire and just have everyone send me a dollar until I was a millionaire. Right. Because the is not that big a deal. Right. I couldn't do that because it was Disney. And I'm like, well, I can't just be taking money from strangers, but I mentioned this idea of one time on the local or whatever, and then people just found my Venmo, which I honestly didn't even know what my name was.

They found my Venmo and just started sending me a dollar at a time. And I was like, not significant. I was like 15 people. And I was like, I can't accept this. Like, I don't feel right about it. I was saying it as a joke, although it would be cool to be a millionaire just from strangers sending me one dollar at a time. I was like, I feel guilty about like fifteen dollars.

I don't want to get in trouble for what are we going to do Billi, what are we going to do about. So I would send the dollars back to them and then I found out from someone else on the show who shall remain nameless, he also started receiving one dollars. And I'm like, Yeah, but you got to send that back. You can't be keeping those dollars. You got to send it back to the people. Can't just be taking you to a strange place because and this person was like, I'm keeping that money, that money.

They sent me a dollar. Who?

Chris. Chris. Christiane, I don't know where they're sending it from, like I the same you you don't know if that works, it's unproven. I've read articles that the sending back process on benefits. Very true. Chris, you are you kidding me?

You are stealing dollars from the way they gave it to me. I didn't steal it. It'd be rude not to keep it right.

I mean, Billy, that was that was a little bit of you know, what he tried to protect you by saying who shall remain nameless. He cloaked it is cloaked in the yard knew.

How many dollars did you get, Chris? How many dollars did you steal from the listeners as you judge your father for being a stealer of dollars from the listeners?

We got to shut this whole thing down. We got to shut the whole thing down.

We might have I might have gotten like twenty one dollars. Hold on, Billy, help me out here, because I think your judgment, Mike, is busy with an engineer. We're all bouncing off each other. People are wearing masks. It's totally crazy in here, Billy. We've made a terrible mistake. I feel like. I feel like. I feel like we need to not be making any videos for anybody because I'm I'm a little scared, Chris, of what's going to happen with your father.

He's I feel like he's going to get in trouble. He's going to get into the drinks one night. He's going to be in his garage. You're going to end up in a bush. And that's not the worst thing.

That's what I'm worried about. Well, that's a start. That's how those videos start coming from the garage. That's when we need to start.

He's going to say something that gets in trouble, Chris, like and then we're not going to be able to protect him. And then he's going to blame me because, you know, we've done this. How long have we done this? This is the game with me and him. You know what's going to happen? He's going to disgrace us all in scandal. And it's going to be my fault for giving him a camera so he could take money from the listeners.

That's right, Zigi.

There's stuff this. Do they get everything on the same page? We all know exactly how it's going to go. It's just a matter of time. When will it happen?

The spaceship is going to blow up and end up in a ditch. If we can't handle the speed of this, we can't pay ship again.

I got to make a new open. Do I have to make a new weapon? How bad can you guys explain to me how bad the big stupid pirate open you like that.

Got a bad rap yesterday. There is plenty of legit pirate sounds in that open. There's there's waves clashing. There's sword fighting. There's a pirate saying, walk the plank and you guys send me that open semi that open.

Hold on and I'll play it here for Dan. All right. I want to hear that. But Mike, before this is Chris just taking dollars. He's making crap again. Mike, he's making. Is this what you're telling? This is bad. I was embarrassed by that taste of it.

Needed it needed some. I can't find a YouTube clip of a pirate saying, yo ho, yo ho ho, a pirate radio life for me.

I mean, you have access to resources and very clearly they have to have royalty free already can pirate effects. No, no.

That there are there in there. I mean, even listen to this open. I mean there's thought in doing there's ambient noise. It just I didn't create that. Those are commercial free pirate sounds.

You don't know this. Our former employer just bought pirates. All of pirates are owned by said employer. You can't say yo ho without adding another word at the end because yo ho is now copyrighted and copyrighted. Whatever it is, you can't say that ARG is kind of like if you do the hard H at the end, you can do that, but you can't just do the G because that's also owned. You can't say dead men tell no tale.

You can't say that. Don't even say that. Someone's going to have to believe that.

But you have to be very careful with all the pirate themed things that you use because again, I pirates just as a genre owned, I couldn't find a clip on the Internet of a parrot saying my dad's been stress eating like that's not something I can find on the air. But you can do that.

You just this can I need to figure all this out. This needs to slow down for a second because the guys just one up is looking at. Yeah. And you got to just walk back into the room with some coffee for me and this thing might careen into a ditch here in a second where we start telling the good stories because you guys need to bring me back at some point, please, because the show's getting away from me today. You need to remind me to bring back because you just mentioned something about buying something in bulk the day that I bought the elephant.

That we put all over the studio, I want to tell that story because it's so scary. It's a joke nobody got. It's a joke. It was so not worth the risk. Nobody got the joke.

But so, Chris, you have to, Chris, because it was such a good joke. I'm not I'm going to tell the story of this. It was such a good joke. So we'll get to that in a second. OK, but stigmatises just walk back into the room. Mike is going crazy here and he has got the sound of this pirate open because I don't know what you guys made here. And things are moving very fast around here.

And Mike, as Chris to produce something, Mike is swallowed by engineers and masks and and he's half of the show, half out of it. What happened with you?

You introduced it. I was the tech. Good. Blame each other. That's fine. Mike, help me figure out why it was going well, why it's such a crappy open to the big Stewie when we handed it over to Chris and Roy.

So I just wanted to rework the big city open, which is its own entity, which probably could be sold separately to guys. I hope you hear that because it's just like we just made something that's different when it's recorded the exact same way. But I just wanted it to sort of reflect the aesthetic that Angel, our graphics designer, already put out there for our podcast, which looks phenomenal. By the way, Angel is such a talent. So Roy website coming.

Wait, do you see a website coming here by the end of the week, angels going to roll out something.

That dude. That dude. It's a tequila. All right, so yeah, yeah, to just give the address is out yet, by the way, I also spotted something. How much deeper can you get into that bottle? Yeah.

All right. So I say, hey, let's make a new big SUV open rowing. Chris are on it. They send it out. Timely fashion. I actually don't hear it because I got a million things going on. I appreciate them getting this thing done. The first time I'm hearing it is in my car driving home to hear the first big Zawi. And usually I trust Chris and Roy and it's usually great. Roy, you did a good job.

It's the work Chris provided that Chris do your job, man.

Let me know. Right. Just hold on.

Hold on. Just back up for a second because I need to interrupt Mike. And I'm sorry before we get to the sound, Chris got do your job, man, like I give your two minutes of me giving just great pirate sound.

All right?

I can't control like Chris do your job says the hose that's drinking tequila at ten thirty a.m.. So as the hose, you saved your job. Yeah, well that's true. And he yeah. He's already pulled that card. One's on Greg. I think he's just going to keep reminding me and Greg's going to sink the whole thing.

I thought it was going to be Stu. Greg's going to sink the whole thing. He's going to get drunk, he's going to get drunk on Cameo and he's going to say some dumb thing and then he's going to blame us. Like that's what's going to happen.

Be highly unprofessional for him to get drunk on the job. Here's the open for the big city.

No, no, no, wait, wait, wait, wait. Let me set this up. Let me paint the picture. Everyone, close your eyes. You're out. You're on a pirate ship right now. It's late at night and you're at sea action.

Again, thank you for interrupting me.

Do you have any. Welcome to the Big Show, a podcast exclusive, a risky move, just when you thought the show could not be more dilutive, locked up like bail. Wow, no more free Disney trips.

Now, here's the marching band to nowhere or make that face swap dance, stress eating and the habitual liar watch. You guys can't be trusted.

The big chewy yo yo ho off our radio life for me.

Those are the Jets fans in the background. I think it's all. That just like every.

OK, everyone needs to slow down because it hurt my feelings. OK, to have the voice of Hank Azaria.

No one more so than you with the tequila.

It hurt my feelings to hear our friend Hank Azaria, who has worked at the top of show business, lending his voice. Chris, to you doing that for shitty pirates now like you got to do better than that.

You and your you know, your eyes closed. That's what I need to do better. But so, Mike, can you please get for me? I need to get to this elephant joke. Yes. Billy, what do you have?

Well, I would say, you know, of all the issues with that open, one of which was it was kind of brockmeyer on a pirate ship. For some reason, we need to maybe like a pirate accent or something to set the scene because I was thinking I was going to watch a baseball game. But there's sword fighting going on in the background. And again, this was with my eyes closed. So maybe this was me. I don't know.

Well, Chris, I'm not certain. Chris, if he closes his eyes, I'm not certain he'll open them up.

I mean, he might fall down.

He's hammered. I mean, listen, Billy, I can only produce was handed to me. That was what was handed to me there. I mean, OK, I thought we produce something good.

That was the hand that was dealt. Roy, guys, you need to help me with something, OK? Because we are really showing. We know. Help me, Roy, do not laugh at this. Right, everyone. Roy, everyone needs to be better around here and I need some help, OK? And Roy, except me right now, you need to be better, too. Can you stop eating a sandwich while we're doing this? You just missed the first ten segment, the first ten minutes of the segment because you needed to go out to get coffee today.

I mean, I need to get you coffee because of the hangover that's about to come your way. I mean, jeez. All right. Well, let me let me get this all out then. By two thirds, totally get drunk. Let me get all of this out. So Brockmeier is at the height of showbusiness, right? He's been a movie star. He's lending his voice, The Simpsons voices, The Simpsons voices to our show for no good reason at all.

What is happening? Where did he go? Just get this straight, you guys just said at one point, my tooth hurts also.

It does. I don't want to go to the dentist covid-19.

You got up and you've got some things to got you tell people you you mother I'm telling you, I'm telling a story here. You tell the people what you just did to me to interrupt the radio show as I'm trying to tell a story to our listeners connected to them that links them to these people who have helped make us what we are. What did you just do to me? While I was talking, I flicked a little piece of my bagel.

It was supposed to go into the garbage.

It went right to its face. Oh, my God.

No, go with that on the floor. I picked it up. I ate it.

Oh, can I finish what I was saying? Because you totally torpedoed the segment as I'm trying to give our listeners a drunk in a drunken inner look at the inner belly of our production team and our chaos. And this isn't just a pirate ship, a pirate ship in Irish Pirates to this story.

It's doesn't summarize. Hank would be very proud to be part of that. All right.

All right. Listen to me. This is something we were doing over the break. We made that Stat of the Day song. I really delighted in having that be our last thing that we produced at ESPN. And we're going to have that for you. You're going to be able to find that on this website in a couple of days, the entirety of this song, because I was super moved. The trick, Daddy and Luke and May Day, the specifics of Miami, the Miami guys that only go to Kenny G method and strangely but forgotten matter in the middle of the night.

Yes.

So we thought that the Saturday you guys tell me because this got cut and I felt bad about it. We had Hank do a little brockmeyer and we were going to extend Stat of the day and it didn't make the cut. A lot of things didn't make the cut because the long stat of the day was going to play for like 24 minutes. But the clocks that ESPN made it almost impossible to do that bit the way we wanted to do it and the way we could do it now that we're going to be a little bit freer.

But, Mike, can you explain to people the back story on why what you're about to play didn't make it in long stat of the day? And basically our comedic cut, Hank Azaria failed it. He tried to do something for us that was exceedingly kind that nobody paid him for. He did extraordinarily well and it didn't make the cut on the bit. And I felt horrible about that because I thought it was exceptional, but it just didn't fit in what we were doing.

Right.

I think that's the bottom line. What we were doing ended up being super musical and we just wanted to keep putting, you know, feelers out there, hey, creative, can you help us? Because we wasn't we weren't quite sure exactly what this was going to be. Could it be music and pop poppy talking for a little bit? Someone gives a stat and then Brockmeyer shows up and then another song and then we just settled on, OK, this is super long.

Let's just make it one big piece where we're supposed to be Simpsons characters throughout that, just singing and doing stuff.

But it just became a piece of music.

And so, well, we can tell the story like there were supposed to be Alissa's attached actually giving stats, but it became something else.

Yes. Actually, that was supposed to have and we can tell the story. Yes, Billy, we can tell the story. You know, one stat of the day was supposed to have how about this one stat of the day was supposed to have and it fell apart at the last second. Meryl Streep reading some joke about what her favorite stat of the day was. Leonardo DiCaprio reading some joke about what? But what's that?

I wonder how that fell apart. I know, but we were so close. We were so damn close. So, Billy, what were you going to have been drinking?

But I can I can back this up. We were really close on this happening, but it wasn't going to be able to be turned around in time for our deadline, which apparently was six thirty a.m. day of because that's just us.

So once we realized we weren't going to have people giving their own personal favorite stats and nonmusical form than this one to make the cut, I was going to say, yeah, the email we got was like, right, this is if John C. Reilly is going to resiling what's happening now. So then we're going through and finding all these different stats. And wow, if we knew Merrill was going to. You know what's funny?

You know what's funny? The people who have been most inside on this show, Billy, you'll you'll enjoy this, because during the pandemic, what happened is me and Mike were in a world where, like Jonah Hill and John C. Reilly were going to be doing stuff for us, like they were going to actually be doing these bits. I was talking to them about what the bit was going to be. And some of you may have heard in the underbelly that existed at ESPN that was built there.

We were doing during the pandemic some weird made up characters and stuff.

And they were going they were going to be John C. Reilly and Jonah Hill like they were, in fact. Roy, did you recognize the guy from Scrubs who did a bit for us?

No, I did not. The janitor from Scrubs did one. Oh, new Flint.

Yes, yes, yes. You know the name? Well, he knows the scrubs, but he knows the actors.

But you don't you didn't get the bit, Roy, though. You didn't get the you don't know what we're talking about right now. No, I didn't hear Mike. Was he the bad eater?

Was he was a David Gilmore, the the lobbyist for bad meat that was actually supposed to be played by Jonah Hill.

That was supposed to be Jonah Hill. So we were going to get some of these people and we were going to be able to play with them. But actually, what's funny, who played Mike, who played John C. Reilly was was ready to play a character who during the pandemic was a baseball player who had never thought about anything in his life. And in a moment of introspection, he wondered during during the pandemic in a really depressed way about it, he considered his sexuality for the first time.

And John C. Reilly was supposed to be playing that character. But who did play the character? Mike, this is offensive.

One of the one of the founding members of the Upright Citizens Brigade. I don't remember his name, though, and I feel embarrassed. Yeah, well, we're down here now, aren't we?

Yes, yes, yes. John C. Reilly doing I mean, he was supposed to be this Tampa twenty twenty. You're supposed to be this Tampa baseball player, but his life is falling. Thank you for continuing to ask me questions over the air. OK, I'm sorry about that.

Maybe I'm not there have been on the show. Maybe you could drop me.

It was all about name dropping. It's not name dropping if you can't name. And we don't and we don't actually get them, so what did you talk to Jonah Hill? Yeah, he did. Yeah, he did so. And then his publicist stepped in because. Well, I don't I shouldn't even be telling these stories. OK, so can you go and play for us, Mike? Exactly. This is the Brockmeyer, but you tell me if it would have fit anywhere instead of the day because it hurt me to not be able to.

I brought that Brockmeyer character is so good, so damn good. It's just perfect for our audience and hangnails it every damn time. And I can't believe that dude is even available to us. The talent on that guy is just absurd. And so this is Brockmeyer trying to get into stat of the day, the long stat of the day, but he couldn't make his way into it. So let's see if this fits in any way or if it's just funny.

Standalone fastball in the dirtball one, folks. Jim Brockmeyer with him this afternoon. It's the top of the four, which means it's time for the Franklin Auto Group stat of the day today. That is a fun one about a pitcher who threw his first Major League pitcher back in 1986 and was still on the mound four decades later. An impressive feat made even more impressive when you consider that in 1986, many baseball players were just cocaine fueled vampires, men who did not sleep or read.

They simply took the field for three hours and then participated in nights of central rampant debauchery while they make Motley Crue blush outside of that one to a.. Now, I remember a road trip I took back then as a wet behind the ears minor league broadcaster when I accidentally stumbled into the home team's locker room after a game before I could let out. Even though I'm sorry I saw a man wearing nothing but batting. Blood is being held upside down by his ankle by the team's starting shortstop and a woman who I can only assume was a prostitute burying his head in a Tony Montana esque mountain of pure Colombian white powder.

Fastball swung on and missed two and one. Now I'm hope to see my fair share of drug use and inverted genitals. But something about that image haunts me to this day. Perhaps it was the out look on the shortstop's face, but more likely it was that everybody in that locker room was cheering everyone except for the team's mascot, a cartoonish S.R. dressed like the Gorton's fisherman with a huge smile on his face. He was just sitting in the corner, rocking back and forth and weeping as if he were witnessing the last days of Saddam.

Now, whenever I see any mascot's face, I experience a sort of sense memory flashback to the smell of sweat, cocaine and the crystal vision of that tormented sea otters. Thousand yards stare. That one is Chope found the right side. Well, it looks on that mode. You're Franklin on a group stat of the day is that by the time he retired in 2002, Jamie Moyer did face eight point nine percent of all major league hitters ever dating back to the eighteen hundreds.

Wow. How about that, huh? Jamie Moyer and Pedro misses with a breaking ball count goes for folks.

I'm aware that I went out a little bit, a little bit of a tangent there, realizing that I just said some things that probably were not appropriate. Mentioning along said something is meaningful to our family audience. Isn't that love instead of the day. So I owe you are the good people of Franklin, all of whom are sincere, heartfelt apology. Know, I'm proud of myself. I think of myself as a man of faith, and that is a deep drive to left field my coffee house.

That is going to be a thing that will make it a forty nothing ball game.

It didn't we didn't get to edit it. We never got around to editing it. But goal here, a cell phone ding in the middle. Yes. Yes. But he did that work for hours and it didn't make the cut. And I'm going to need to apologize to him by phone after embarrassing him publicly because he should have made the call.

Now, it made its debut on the official number one sports podcast. Right. It's a standalone. So you could tell them that it was so good. We just wanted to play it on its own. I do. Okay.

But, Mike, where can now with the context. Right. Because we we had created during the pandemic, we were a bit bored and so and everybody was locked up and creatives were going crazy. And so we created a silly, absurdly silly underbelly world of just totally made up characters. Shane Bacolod, Tim Journo's, I think might have been my favorite, a strength coach who during the pandemic wasn't following any of the rules and then tried to kill me.

Mike, where can I explain to people this is do we still have we have this.

So if you were if you were always subscribed to mystery create those episodes are downloaded to your phone so you can go through the archive. Unfortunately, with our transition away from ESPN, part of the deal is we get to keep our feeds, but we have to sort of clear the cash rate, the archive, but. Since we have access to our library, nothing stops us from putting out these episodes repurpose so I was actually going to put out in the coming days a Tim Gern centric mystery grade episode to catch everybody up on some of the good stuff that we were doing during the pandemic with Tim Gern.

So all of his appearances were going to be in one self-contained mystery. Great episode.

But I have to I have to thank Ian Roberts, because this is a comedic like these are this this comedy, these this group of comedy people, OK? It's a very small group. It's an elite group. They all know each other and they're wildly funny creatives. And for some reason, I don't understand why, but probably because we're in this weird vibrating thing that's a little different in sports. They keep coming over and being like, hey, like, can I do something over there?

Like this might be fun.

Yeah. You worked with legit stars in the improv comedy world, Neil Flynn, who played David Gilmore so great quick on his feet and you have to be there. Ian Roberts played Andy Ganja. That was a name that escaped as Ian Roberts, a founding member of the Upright Citizens Brigade, played this depressed slugger from the Tampa baseball team that was going through depression and self discovery during the pandemic.

We were never going to tell you who these people were. We thought it was funny. We thought it would have been funnier. Right. The reason I was dropping the names, John C. Reilly and Jonah Hill, is because we thought it would be funnier if they just did it.

And we never told you it was that what we didn't want to bring additional attention by saying the names out there, because I was legitimately scared that ESPN would squash it because we were playing it straight for it to work. We couldn't tell you that it was a joke. So I didn't want it coming across ESPN's desk that all these people are talking about. Who is this Tim Jones character? Why is Dan giving this person a platform? So we didn't even mention it on the radio show.

Really?

I feel like I should keep, though. You tell me if I'm wrong, Mike, because I don't know. And we've been on parts of this journey in a way that's so it's just wonderful, OK, because I will tell you that that's when I got in trouble at ESPN and the whole thing was shaking and shaking and it felt unstable. A whole bunch of really cool people rushed in support to my side like cool, genuine people who just wanted to help us because they get what we do.

They understand the show. And they they came to make me feel super supported by allowing me to play around in this playground where I think if you look at it, Mike, this is so much more interesting from this perspective, looking back on it as a as a collection of work of people who came to rescue us when I don't know whether we should tell people who Tim journo's. I don't want to tell people who. Tim Oh, you can't do that.

The die hards already know.

And I don't want same yota. I don't want I don't want people, but I also don't want people to know who Shane Bacolod is. And I don't want people to know who Harry the horse is.

OK, so we will reveal everybody else, but not those. But those people have kind of like revealed themselves or community is. I was really impressed that the Reddit kind of figured out with certainty who some of these people were because Neil Flynn doesn't have like this instantly recognizable voice. And they were like really trying to piece together the mystery, which was a cool part of it.

People got so mad explained to me, because I don't know, I think Shane Bacolod or was was my favorite. I'm not sure whether it was it was him or journals. And I liked all of them because these people are very good at comedy and they played the bit so very well. I would have loved to get Jonah Hill to end up playing the lobbyist on behalf of eating bad meat. Mike, can you just get that for me now so that we can give people the context?

Like, how hard is that to get right now to mystery?

Great episode. Like just.

Well, I mean, but know that that mystery great. If we were to put it here are the one that you like best.

I'm into the tequila, so help me out. OK? All right. So you know, we're bouncing outside of sports every once in a while here because there are very few, precious few sports going on right now that aren't Korean baseball. And we've been pandemic heavy in some of the things that we're talking about daily. But I couldn't believe this thing that I was reading about next Gen Meats lobbying Congress for a bailout package. And you guys have had me recently siding with billionaires, even though I'm being sarcastic about feeling bad for the Warren Buffett and Mickey Aronson's and the Saudis.

You guys have gotten on me. And here is a company, next gen Meat, lobbying Congress for a bailout because, of course, bad sales have plummeted since the pandemic started. So Alison has gotten in touch with their head lobbyist, David Gilmore. And I guess my first question is how how in good conscience can you ask for a bailout, given everything that the world is enduring right now as a result of what happened with Batman to begin with?

Well, now, first of all, I have to correct you. We don't know that this involved a bat at all.

That's conjecture. It could have happened. But if there was one infected bat and someone on. Fortunately, took a bite of it. Well, that's if you took a bite of a human being right now, you would maybe just as bad off, right? I mean, the disease travels in in mammals. And so we don't concentrate on that, the you know, the possibility that a single bat infected a single human led to catastrophe, what we prefer to concentrate on is that society, especially American society, is missing out on a whole branch of nutrition and delicacy.

And and that is the bat in its end, its meat, its the sustenance it provides. And by the way, we can get to this later, if you wish. There were there are many other many other animals that could provide nutrition that are completely ignored in American dining. But yes, we we at next gen meats, we're at the moment, we're concentrating on the bad and the neglect it's been subjected to.

Well, I didn't know that bad meat was a culinary thing until this, to be honest with you. I guess I was ignorant. I did not think of people eating. But this is a successful industry. This is who who is buying a lot of bad product.

Oh, it's a global thing. It's been established for for hundreds of years before it was available commercially.

People dined on bats just as a regular way of having lunch or, you know, it wasn't there. I don't know if anything was considered a delicacy 200 years ago there such thing as a delicacy. But, yes, it is.

It's see, we in America live in a sort of cocoon.

We're not we're not open to we eat chicken, beef and pork basically is all Americans live on and we don't. We have blinders on.

It's let me give you an example. In in Spain, for instance, there is a long established eating. A restaurant called Commando's Murcielago, if I'm pronouncing that correctly, they've been serving bat for for 150 years.

David Gilmore, as I said here on ESPN Radio, next Gen Medes lobbying Congress for a bailout package. Can you explain to me what exactly you're lobbying for, David? Well, where I don't like to say lobbying, I prefer to consider myself an advocate and then I do it with a clear conscience because I believe in the the nutritional value of bad meat.

And in the meantime, it's not like eating your vegetables.

You know, it actually is a bit of a delicacy. It's you know, the old saying is it tastes like chicken. Everyone likes to say that about virtually everything. It tastes like chicken. Well, you know, bad does taste a little bit like chicken. And I, I tried to say it's sort of a slogan, you know, it tastes like chicken, but with wings. And then I quickly realized, of course, the chickens also have wings.

And so that wasn't going to work.

So I changed it to it tastes like chicken, but with ears. And so far no one has, you know, taken me up on wanting to use that as a slogan. But I'm just trying to get the ball rolling.

You know, it's just something that obviously they're the best.

Meat suppliers are struggling right now because we've got a little bit of a PR crisis, you know. Nutritional value, though, what is the nutritional value of bat?

Well, about the same as, say, a mouse, you know, it's there's the protein, there's not a lot of meat on a bat, as you can imagine it once it's extruded or however you would explain how you remove the meat from a bat, maybe a tablespoon full of meat.

So you need a little more than just a quick snack, a quick burst of energy. You know, it's like if you're taking a break from your soccer game or something, just take a quick a quick nibble if you want to make a meal out of it. You're talking about several of the if not dozens of bats, but the nutritional value is right up there with any other meal.

So, like jerky or they're like just protein. Yes, funny you should say that bad jerky is something that we're trying to get moving along. It's it's been around forever. You know, people would hang hang bad meat in their cabin or what have you.

And as it dries, then you can store it and for a long hike or something, or if you're forced to leave your village or if you're, you know, being stalked by some predator, I'm thinking, you know, dinosaurs or tigers. I don't know how long. I don't know if that's where around back then I'm getting a little out of my lane.

But yes, bat jerky is a thing. Next gen meet, are there other meets other than that, like I again, this is foreign to me, I'm a bit ignorant here, so forgive my ignorance. But I did not know that bat eating was a thing. And next gen meats, is it limited to bats or are there is there other exotic fare?

I'm glad you asked me that. And it's there are several species of animals that have been neglected in terms of being looked to for nutrition and sustenance. You familiar with a lemur? You know, lemur is.

Oh, God, no. A lemur. Yes, they're adorable lemurs.

Adorable ring tailed lemur is one is one. So.

Yeah, well, they're adorable. Yes. It's sort of a cross between a monkey and a raccoon, I would say. Sort of kind of a stylish raccoon if you will.

But their meat is is delicious.

And no one, since you're you're right. They are sort of cute or adorable and and so we don't, you know, raise them to be slaughtered and turned into meat. That that seems cruel. So the lemur meat that the next gen meat sells are lemurs that have passed on naturally. Lemurs that have died of old age, if you will. And I know that may sound unappetizing to some people, but would you rather than be slaughtered as young lemurs or, you know, or slaughtered as dead old lemurs?

Again, David Gilmor with us on ESPN Radio. A lobbyist here lobbying Congress for a bailout package for the selling of bats as a food for next gen. Meet David Gilmore. Can you please explain to me how in good conscience I believe a lot of people listening to this would be wondering how it is that you can ignore sort of the science on? It's not conjecture when it comes to the bat meat and how this started. Everything is viewed as conspiracy theories beyond the science.

Are you saying that it's settled fact that this coronavirus came from the ingestion of bad meat? That is what I am saying.

Yes, I believe that that is settled fact. I don't think I have that wrong.

Hmm.

OK, well there OK, look, let's say that I accept your bogus theory that it came from an actual ingestion of bad meat.

Well, that happens sometimes. It doesn't.

If you eat a bad dented can of mushroom soup, you might get sick and you don't call for the, you know, eradication of mushrooms is just a single case that went wrong. If if a horsebox you off, you don't, you know, return with a with a machine gun and kill all the horses. I've wanted a field here. I don't mean to discuss killing hundreds of horses, but you know what I'm saying.

Eh, OK, let's say that about. A bad, bad, but a one one bad apple in the barrel cause this little problem we have here. Well, you know, that's going to happen. Don't, don't, don't, don't turn your back on.

The chance of a lifetime of enjoying a possible choice for dinner, lunch, breakfast, snack, breakfast, buffet, breakfast, bat, breakfast, that I, I didn't think that was a food.

And if I did think it was a food, I thought it was a dinner breakfast.

But, yes, just something to, you know, breakfast, they say, is the most important meal of the day.

And you start off your day with a you hop out of bed and think, you know what, I'm just going to have a little bite a baton and hop on the bike and, you know, or whatever it is, you enjoy doing a bite of bad and get on a pogo stick.

I don't know. It gives you energy and it also puts a smile on your face.

And you don't I should point out that it doesn't have to be looking like a bat in your freezer.

You know, that's that's not the most appealing thing in the world. This is the same way that, you know, a hamburger patty doesn't look like a cow. It is processed, you know. And so the kids, you know, when you get up in the morning to feed your children some bad, it's it's not going to scare them. It doesn't look like an animal. Very few foods look like an animal. I am not sure I can think of one.

David, thank you for being on with us. We appreciate the time again. NexGen Meats is lobbying Congress for a bailout package, and he is the head lobbyist on behalf of next gen meat. Thank you, David, for being on with us. Thank you very much.

Wow. Wow, that was great. Amazing. Yeah, incredible. Thank you for letting me stop drinking in the morning on Thanksgiving. Jesus.