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Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the car rental studios. It's the Dave Ramsey Show for Data's Dumb Cash is King and a paid off home mortgage has taken the place of the BMW as the status symbol of choice.

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My co-host on the air today, Ramsey personality, Rachel Crooge, number one, best selling author, a couple of times over, getting ready to be three times launching a new book today for presale.

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Yes, this is exciting. It's the presell launch. So, yeah, today you can order a copy of my new book, Know Yourself, Know Your Money and its understanding, discovering why you handle money the way you do and what to do about it. So I realized, I don't know, probably about two, three years ago that for me some of the big aha moments I've had in my life is when I've learned more about myself and who I am and that self-awareness.

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I really think it helps you and your marriage. It helps you and your parenting. It helps you in your work environment. I mean, so much.

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And, you know, the the beginnings of this idea were with that. And then one of the things we keep seeing is everybody's helped by that.

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If, you know, kind of like we see when we started years, thousand years ago when I started teaching F.P. way back, you know, are you a spender or saver? You're a nerd or you're a free spirit. Now, we got people standing on the debt free stage. One T-shirt says nerd. Once a free spirit like self identify. Yeah, that's me. And it helped them understand and how to communicate to the other person. Yeah.

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I mean, it gives you language when you start to understand yourself. And then, you know, from my story I looked up and I was like, man, I wonder what if I applied all of this to my money, all this awareness of OK, who I am, everything from how I grew up to my natural tendency is to my fears. I mean, all of it has to do with who you are as a person, but it also affects the way you handle money.

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So Ramsey Solutions and this show, you know, we're incredible at teaching people the how this is how you do it. This is how you get out of debt. This is how you budget. This is how you invest. This is how you become a millionaire. This is how and we're brilliant at it. And we help people and give them such freedom in that. And so I thought, OK, what if I kind of go under that foundation of the how and ask the questions, why?

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Why am I why? Why do I tend to be a spender? Why, why do I feel like I get nervous if there's like a scarcity set, you know, a situation in my life and I feel myself grab onto money tightly when my spouse is just freely spending like like asking those kind of questions really helps you kind of diagnose yourself and your money habits, but also helps you with what you're saying to the people around you. Like if you're married and you and your spouse just cannot seem to get on the same page, you keep missing each other.

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You know, you read this book because maybe you say, oh, my gosh, that's why, like, I understand that now. That's why he does this or why she does this. And so it really it gives you language.

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And if you grew up in a family that was way functional with money and your spouse grew up in a family that was way dysfunctional with money, you and Winston had an advantage. Both of your families were good with money.

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And both of us, both families were good with conflict as well.

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And consequently, we actually love Winston's parents a lot. We're like best friends. We love them. I mean, even if y'all weren't around, we would hang out with them. And so there are kind of people, you know, but not most people don't have that.

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Yeah, well well, I mean, that's the first part of the book is about your upbringing and realizing, OK, you know, did you grow up in a household where things were communicated so well or maybe you communicated about money like the house I grew up in because you're my dad and like this is what you did and you talk about it and it's very normal, very natural. But some people I mean, it was it was taboo. It wasn't said, it wasn't spoken on.

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And so you didn't you never really knew. But then you felt the emotional side of the household. So some emotional households were very stressed when it comes to money like you knew, OK, you know, the bills are coming. Our mom's getting stressed here. They're getting in fights here. Like, you know, you start to feel the tension. Some households, it was a very, very emotional side when it comes to money that, you know, there wasn't a lot of stress, there wasn't a lot of anxiety.

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And so all those kind of like you can kind of pinpoint yourself.

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How fast forward are you are twenty seven or you're forty seven and you go, oh, that did form part of the way I look at money. So when when money comes up I feel stressed. Well, because mom and dad always felt stressed and that was the only thing was communicated to me.

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Yes, absolutely. So this is why I'm avoiding avoiding conflict because hey, it's just easier just like sweep it under the rug, because I don't really want that. I don't really want the conflicts like we're good. I'll just let him do it or I'll just let her do it, you know? And that's why some people avoid even having conversations about money. So there's so much there. Right. Like there you could you could write a whole book on just that one, that one section.

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That's one of eight of the sections of the book. But it is it is it is huge to discover yourself and why you do the things you do with money, because for all of you listening, you know, as you're getting out of debt, you're walking the baby steps. Like, my hope is that you just don't white knuckle your way through it. And just like, oh, it's going to get through. It's going be a terrible two years and be terrible, which, yes, there's a lot of sacrifice when you get out of debt and you're on baby steps one through three.

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But when you can kind of understand, OK, that's why I'm doing this and this and this, it almost, I think, allows you to not only win with money faster because you can get. Your habits and your decisions with money, but it also gives you a level of freedom that you're like, OK, I can kind of breathe a little easier because now I'm understanding why that's bothering me.

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Yeah. Or why I'm naturally good at that. And it's bothering much power. Yes, that too. Yeah, absolutely. You know, it seems like.

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Why don't you get this. Yeah. You know, once you get this and well, they came they have a whole different you know, they're not a spender. They're not a saver. They're not a nerd. They're not a free spirit. They came up in a different household. They came by. And so when you go through all these different lenses and you use your fears, everyone has different money, fear.

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So I outlined six of those in the book. I mean, your fears around money cause you to make decisions with money because you don't want your greatest fear to come into reality. Yeah. Don't ask your mother about that. Oh, good.

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The books already written. OK, what do you know her fears about money. No worries are the fears are that we're going to go back to bankruptcy. So there's not a chance. Oh, there's that.

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There's that's one of the fears that I'm going to that my past mistakes are going to catch up with me. I'm going to go back to where I was or I'm going to I'm I'm going to be like my parents. That's a fear. Yeah. It's that kind of thing. I grew up like this and I never, ever want to go back. So I'm going to make all these decisions so I don't go back to that place. The number one financial fear for women, it's the lack of the lack of security.

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When you feel like it is not stable, man, your fear and your tension rises up even in me, like I feel that sometimes. So it's a it's a real thing. And I think, again, this book hopefully will give you some light bulb moment, some aha moments. But also do something with that, help you and your money journey and with the people around you.

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I mean, we can we can help you.

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We've always been, as you said, brilliant about helping you heal the how to how to get out of debt. We can heal your debt. We show you how to do it. Yeah, we can heal that. But this is more of the. Why do you have the emotional scar. Yeah. Ah. The emotional healing and the spiritual healing. Yeah. That goes with it. And you know, when I went through the process of going bankrupt and then learning the stuff that we teach now, part of what the Lord took me through was a was a spiritual healing too.

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And I sometimes forget that people separate those two because I did it all at once. Yeah, absolutely.

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No yourself. No. Your Money is the new book. It goes on presale today.

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If you'd like to take the easy money quiz and start to know yourself, it's a free thing to take a free, free quiz, take the money quiz text money quiz to one word to thirty three 799 money quiz to thirty three seven eight nine. Of course you can get the book at Dave Ramsey Dotcom and you can preorder it starting now. If you preorder any time between now and the time it comes out January the 5th, we're giving you plenty of notice.

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You get over fifty dollars in free bonus items. No yourself, no.

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Your Money audiobook read by the author, Know Yourself, Know Your Money e-book and the exclusive video lesson from Rachel Cruise. On this subject, you're going to be hearing a lot more about the subject and about this book in the coming months as a part of Ramsey. Plus, as a part of this book coming out in January, it will be yet another number one bestseller for Rachel Guerrouj. Discover why you handle money the way you do and what to do about it.

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The new book is Know Yourself, Know Your Money, Rachel Cruise Dotcom or Dave Ramsey Dotcom. Most home security companies try and trap you with high prices, tricky contracts and lousy customer support, simply safe, on the other hand, has everything you need to protect your home. With none of the drawbacks of traditional home security, professional monitoring keeps watch ready to send professionals if there's an emergency. All this starts at 15 dollars a month. Try today at simply safe direct dotcom.

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You get free shipping and a 60 day risk free trial. You can preorder Rachel Cruz's new book, my co-host today here on the air at Dave Ramsey dot com or Rachel Cruise dot com, either one. The book is Know Yourself, Know Your Money. You've got to zoom in and let the YouTube or see the cover and the rest of you look deeply into your radio. Come on, zoom in, guys. Those of you with a camera, people I'm giving I'm giving directions to.

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You are in a very quick, very good accent. So there you go.

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I love it. It looks great. It's a great cover. Thanks. Thanks. Thanks. Yeah, it was it was fun. That process is always interesting. Very cool. Good stuff.

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Open phones at eight eight two five five two two five. The book is Know Yourself, Know Your Money and again you can take the money quiz.

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It's free by texting the word money quiz to thirty three 789. Just by doing that you'll start the discovery of yourself process and the discovery. Your responses.

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Yes, but you know it's a little bit like when we first saw the disk profile stuff 30 years ago, 35 years ago, the first time I saw that or the the I had Ian Chron on last week, the Enneagram and you go Oh, well, that's you're a three and you're a nine.

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And, you know, it helps you understand the other person helps you understand yourself and your tendencies and those types of things. Our friend Marcus Buckingham was strength finders.

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And this is not a test like that is this is more of a journey through the different situation.

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It is. And after each of the sections of the book, though, you do you do have a little bit of an assessment of whether you're plotting yourself on a quadrant or a a line between this extreme and this extreme. I mean, there is there is a little bit of it. But you're right. Yet you're not going to go.

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But there's not at the end. There's not one massive test that you're like Enneagram.

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No, no, no, you're right. You're right. Yeah, but there is that level again. Yeah. Of of self discovery. And I think it's it's very helpful. I mean, as I was writing it once and I my husband, we were both laughing, I was like, if we had if we like recognise them. But this even earlier marriage, it would cause probably us not to have some of those moments. We were like, what?

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Why did you do that? Now I'm like, oh, OK. I get that because you're more lean this way versus this way.

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Even Dave Ramsey's daughter had those issues. And make sure Dale is in Annapolis, Maryland.

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Hey, Dale, welcome to The Dave Ramsey Show. I think how are, you know, the great man, how can I help so we are in baby step to trying to pay down debt. And my question is, we are sitting on some bonds that my wife's parents had bought for her throughout the years. And and so we're wondering if we should cash those bonds in order to pay down debt. My two main concerns, one is from my wife, one is from me.

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My wife is concerned that our cars are going to go kaput in the next year or so. And so she wants to be able to buy a new car and might use those bonds to do that. And my concern with using the bonds is it will push our income status up to the point where we would not receive insurance anymore because my current job does not offer insurance right now. And so is trying to get your thoughts on the. I don't think it'll push your income up because it's not an income source, I don't know who's calculating this, whether it's a state insurance program or what, but most of the income based decisions on the furnishing of a state or a federal benefit are not affected by the sale of investments.

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They're looking at your adjusted gross income in most cases. So I don't think that's going to happen. As far as your wife's situation goes. Here's the thing. How much debt have you guys got?

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Just shy of 22 grand student loans. And how much are these bonds? About 14 grand. OK, and. What's your household income? And just just over 20 grand. OK, so she's not working. That's great in your underemployed, why? I am a part time pastor. So, Kay. Most part time pastors have a full time job. Right now, my denomination is holding me to a part time status, yes. No, I'm saying 88 percent of the pastors in North America are bi vocational.

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Oh, yes, they are. Why aren't you? I don't have the reasons that you're starving to death. Not necessarily necessarily you're at you're at half year at the poverty level, how many kids have you got? One kid.

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We don't have a mortgage. We don't have we don't have utilities. We have none of that.

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Yeah, OK. Yeah.

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I mean, I appreciate you serving the Lord, and I'm not trying to sell you not to do that or not to live your dream, but you don't have any money is your problem. And so your wife has a valid concern about the cars going kaput.

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But what I would tell you is you jump in, I'd get your income up because I think you need to pick up some solid income until you get the full time gig within your denomination.

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And and if, you know, if you add a thousand dollars a month to your income, you dadgum near added 50 percent to it. Right. You know, I mean, that's not that's nothing that's delivering pizzas.

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Occasionally the church and I are in talks to meet two or three, four Saturdays and then a full time status as well. Yeah, well, I'm just moving you to it.

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I'm moving you to 80 hours right now. I'm in talks with you. Because your family's needs you need money. Yeah, and I think, Dale, I think it's for that short period of time that this isn't your long term play. Obviously, to be working on the side and doing this and being a pastor half the time, ideally. Yeah. You want to be a pastor full time when that time comes. I think that's a great time to transition because your income will go up.

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But in this moment, to get you guys out of that twenty two thousand dollars, cashing out the bonds, keeping a little bit if you need to, if you know you're going to replace that car, it's not going to be a great car. So don't be saving, you know, a grand of it to go towards the car. But get a beater, do what you have to do, because after you do that, you're going to have around eight, nine, ten thousand dollars left of that debt of that twenty two thousand.

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I want you to clear that. And then six months. That's right. That's so, again, very short term. You can kind of see the facts that, like, you map it out and you say, OK, yeah, this is very, very possible. And then you can pull back your income if you guys choose to have your emergency fund is fully funded. And maybe by that time your your church, your nomination is getting you into a more of a full time gig as a pastor.

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OK, let's let's kind of dial back just a second. All right. 14 from 22 gives me eight thousand dollars in debt. Go make eight thousand dollars in the next four or five months.

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But do you think they need to say he needs to say a little for the car? No, the cars are going to make it. It's whining. You're just whining, OK? And you're going have to get your income up. It's just you know, it's the thing is she's afraid it's going to be twenty eight thousand lower income risk.

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Their like, what if her car really is less? But I'm saying if the twenty eight thousand lower income is going to last for ten years, that's fine. But if you're going to go get a part time job and and adequately provide for your household, which you're not doing now.

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Then you clean up the rest of this mess very quickly and you save up for some cars because Pastor, listen, I've worked with pastors for 30 years. I love pastors and I love the military and I love folks and first responders. These are the people, man. These are the people of our society that are the heroes and teachers. I can make a list of you people, but I mean, you guys, we work we've worked with 50000 churches since we began.

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And I have been in more situations where I've sat in a pastor's living room with them and their spouse going over their budgets, loving them. I love you guys. And you're starving to death, my son. And you're serving the Lord. So I appreciate you, appreciate your big heart. And I appreciate how your mind is completely focused on one thing and that serving God. And I'm telling you, as as the guy in your household, your household needs more money, young brother, right now.

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And you need to go get you some in the short term.

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And there's nothing unholy about that. It's a matter of fact, that is an extremely holy act in this situation because you're taking care of your own household first.

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And that is nothing but me loving you right there, man. And and please don't even think that I don't understand where you are. I completely understand where you are. I've worked with hundreds, if not thousands of men just exactly where you are over the years.

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And I understand your heart and I understand the denominational limitations and understand all these other things that are going on. I completely understand is what I do.

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And so you got the stuff. You have an income problem, sir. Get your income up, get rid of that, then go get you some cars, then get your emergency phone in place or whatever you do there. And we're going to pay for you to go through Ramsey. Plus for one year, I'm going to donate it to you as our way of saying thank you for serving the Lord. You've been sacrificing for God, and I don't want your family to be between you and that sacrifice anymore.

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This is the Dave Ramsey Show. Number one, best selling author a couple of times over, M.G. Personality, and my daughter, Rachel Cruze is my co-host today on The Dave Ramsey Show, answering your questions about your life and your money. Open phones, a triple eight eight two five five two two five. Erich's New York. Hi, Eric. Welcome to the show. Hi, Dave.

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I read. So thank you so much for taking my call. Sure. What's up? All right. So I'm 21 years old and debt free and I have thirteen thousand dollars in the bank. And I want to know, should I be investing this money at this point or should I just hold onto it for now as an emergency fund? And if I should be investing, which they invest it into? And how much, dude, are you engaged?

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No, because you're a fairly rare find, you're what's known as an eligible bachelor, you actually know how to work, make money, save money and not be in debt to your freaking eyeballs. You're an awesome young man.

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Thank you. You're about to give them, like, marital advice of advisers. No, I don't. By some old fart.

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Where is this going? Yeah. So, Eric, you're what we teach is after paying off all of your debt, which you've done, obviously you don't have debt, is to get that emergency fund in place. You could you could square away that 13 grand. That 13000 is what you said. Twenty one now he's at 13, though. Thirteen. Right, Eric?

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I'm twenty one years old and I have thirteen thousand dollars. Yes, that's it. I got it backwards. So for that thirteen that could be your emergency fund. So being in New York, obviously your expenses are extremely high.

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You know, the the I really don't have that many expenses right now, though, because I'm living at home and I'm going to college. But I was very fortunate my grandparents were able to save up to pay for that for me. OK, so I don't I, I, I would not invest it.

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I would just hold the thirteen as an insurance policy to ensure you finish school with no debt.

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I know your grandparents got it covered, but I don't want any excuses between now and graduation for you to have any debt and you are the best investment you can make until you graduate from school. What are you studying? I'm a psychology major and a minor in business administration. What are you planning to do? That's that's a whole nother question. I'm not entirely sure what I want to do with that yet. I've been thinking about going into human resource management.

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Good, OK.

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Yet another reason to have a little bit of cash pad rather than have the money invested.

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How'd you get this money? Just saving up and just working part time jobs, you know, throughout college in the summer. Guess you're a saver.

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Yeah, you're a natural saver in yourself, disciplined. And you got your eye on the prize. I want you to continue to build that. I don't care if it gets to 50000 and if it's just sitting there in your savings account.

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I know that sounds mathematically unpalatable, but Eric getting his degree is a better rate of return on that money than a mutual fund will give you.

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All right, because if you'll if you'll apply the knowledge that you're getting to a good career track, then where you make some good money as a result of having gone to college then and then and then on top of that, having done so debt free with mainly your grandparents, but also your frugality and being careful, then you get out. It's boring. Everybody wants to say, oh, go to a mutual fund with a Roth IRA.

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You can do that if you want.

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But if you run into a bump in the road, then you have to cash it out or you'd have to borrow student loan. And I'm not going to tell you do either one of those.

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Well, that and after you graduate college, that transition from college to the real world, if you decide to move out to L.A. or something, you know, moving costs, getting your life started as an adult, it takes it takes some cash to be able to kind of like prop yourself up and say, OK, this is what I'm going to do. And having that cash in the bank allows you to have options so you can maybe go move to a place that maybe you couldn't have afforded if you didn't have that 13000 just liquid right there.

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Absolutely. Bills in Boise.

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Hi, Bill. How are you? Hi, Dave and Rachel, how are you? It's an honor to talk to you, too, sir. How can we help? So I have the question is, do I have enough in retirement that I could slow down my contribution to retirement and put it on my mortgage? Currently, my wife and I currently get three weeks after the mortgage. We have our emergency fund. But recently we got a good sized chunk of money.

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But it's all in retirement, so or net worth about two point three dollars million. But almost all of it is retirement. I put 15 percent of my income into retirement now. But what do you what do you own your home? About 175. How old are you? Fifty one.

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OK, and you got a chunk, but so you got an inherited IRA or something like it was actually a company I worked for was an ESOP and they recently sold all my EASTAUGH shares were given out and then moved it to an IRA.

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And what's your household income? About 120 a year. Oh, you've done so well, congratulations. Thank you. Very well done. You know, obviously, mathematically, if you never touch this again, if you never add a dime to two point two million, it'll double roughly every seven years. So, you know, when you're 60, you said you're early 50s, right? Yes.

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So when you're 60, this is going to be worth five million dollars. And when you're 65, it's going to be worth 10 million dollars. And that's without adding anything to it. So can you stop and concentrate on the mortgage and not add anything to it all, huh?

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Yeah, you can.

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And if I could find you don't have any money anywhere except in retirement. Except for emergency fund, about fifteen thousand dollars cash in the bank. I mean, you are retirement plan poor.

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Yeah, you've done no side investing.

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You don't have any assets of any kind that are. No money, no, no, no mutual funds, nothing except retirement. That's correct. We just got out of out of debt recently when we were working on that, didn't have any any assets and this is our money came in.

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Yeah. How much of the two point two was the ESOP? The one point eight oh, well, you OK? Yeah, that's like you hit the lottery, but it's all stuck in that, OK. Wow. Yeah, you're I mean, you're good.

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I'd stop and concentrate on the mortgage. Just highly unusual. I mean, how many times you hear me not.

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I was be I was like, what's he going to say. He's not going to do the baby steps but OK. Yeah, you're done dude. I'm good. It's a very unusual set of mathematics, highly unusual. And congratulations. I'm so glad that you won at that level.

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Man Our Question of the Day, Rachel Fine from is from Blind's dotcom. Find out for yourself why Blind's dotcom is the number one online retailer. Custom window coverings. You get samples that are free shipping that is free. New promos all the time. Always use the magic word, the promo code. Ramsey and that's Blind's dotcom question.

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Yes. This question comes from Ali in Nevada. My husband and I just started our baby steps in May. We have about forty eight thousand dollars left in debts. Both of our incomes are 100 percent commission as we both own our own businesses. So the amount is never guaranteed and neither is a paycheck. The last three months, the way I've been budgeting is taking money. We have from the first on the first and allotting it out and then any paychecks we get during the month we reserve for the next month.

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We're moving into our slow season soon and since we used all of our reserves to pay off debt, I'm having a hard time emotionally. It's unnerving not to know that we may not have rent in December because we're giving every dollar a purpose. What are your suggestions? But we always said cover your four walls. So the idea of not having rent, I understand. So rent, food, utilities and transportation are the things that you want covered first and foremost before anything else, Ali.

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That's where your money needs to go. And considering you are 100 percent commission, you do have to plan for that. So when you have months that come that are bigger than normal, you need to put some of that aside for savings and addition to your emergency funds. So when the months get low, you just kind of bring it out of that. So you do kind of have to tiptoe your way through it and be very, very diligent to making sure those four walls are covered.

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Second thing is you've got a little while between now and December. If you know that your slow season, let's think about a different product line or some other things you can out of the business. But our go go during December, lots of direct to consumer retail stuff is the implementation of this is the Dave Ramsey. The crisis this year has left a lot of people scared about their money. And all they know is they never want to be in this situation again, but they have no idea how to start and there's one way you can help, and that's by helping us, by being a financial peace university coordinators, coordinators are everyday people there.

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And I don't have a master's degree in finance. Well, maybe one or two do, but most don't.

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You walk people through our proven plan to get out of debt, get away from emergencies and actually become wealthy. So you have a never again moment, never again are we going to be here.

[00:30:06]

And if you want to be a coordinator, if you'll lead a virtual class from home right now just for leading a class, we will give you a free Ramsey plus membership for a whole year.

[00:30:21]

Now, that's known as a deal. All you got to coordinate a class and you have your membership to Remzi plus free for a year. That includes financial peace university. Every dollar includes the baby step tracker, the LERN budget and track, lern budget and track.

[00:30:37]

So if you want a free membership, Drambuie plus lead a virtual class text the word lead fpu lead FPU to thirty three seven eight nine lead fpu to thirty three seven eight nine.

[00:30:53]

A lot of people are having real cool experiences during these virtual classes. It's a different kind of a thing and a lot of things that are virtual or SUB-STANDARD, they're not as good as in-person. Yeah, but these virtual classes actually have some elements to them that are better than an in-person class because of the way they're connecting with the people. The lack of time to set up a class, the coordinators had to go and get a room. You have to have a DVD player.

[00:31:18]

You know, they have to, you know, get chairs and all that, you know, that kind of stuff. And, you know, all they got to do now is just flip open their computer. Yeah, for sure. Makes it easier. I mean, on that end, right? I mean, like the setup and everything, you just do it from your home right there. You can even I've even heard a few say, yeah, once the kids go down, we set our class time right after bedtime.

[00:31:38]

So there's no distractions and we just have a good. Yeah. No babysitter problem. Do it. Yep, exactly. So yeah, there's a there's a lot of benefits, a lot of benefits of doing online. And I think there's some elements I think we've all experienced Zoome calls or whatever it was because of covid, you know, you're home and you're having to like figure out technology and there is some clunky ness and getting used to it. But the great thing is, too, I find I mean, I haven't had a Bible study that we went on Zoome for like two months because everyone was kind of scattered everywhere and couldn't get back and all that.

[00:32:04]

And and I don't know when you're in your own home and you're just kind of relaxing, it's it's there's a weird technology thing at first. But once you kind of get over that hump of connecting with, like a screen, it almost makes you feel more comfortable because you're kind of in your own environment and you're just comfortable where you are. I find that to people open up just because of that. Yeah, some people got too comfortable and they added nineteen pounds.

[00:32:28]

The covid-19. Oh yeah. Like the freshman fifteen. Oh yeah. You know the covid-19. I think it's a thing. That's definitely a thing. All right.

[00:32:38]

Sarah is in Milwaukee.

[00:32:39]

Hey Sarah, welcome to the Dave Ramsey Show. Hi, thank you for taking my call. Sure. Well, we're a family of three and we currently rent an apartment, and our situation is that we originally signed a contract with one of my husband's friends and got a contract for.

[00:33:05]

Oh, I'm sorry for a realtor. We're renting looking for a house now. Oh, and he's a buyer's agent. Yes, OK. All right. And we thought we were making the right choice, signing this military contract, but as we moved along since last October, he just wasn't doing a lot for us. We always had to call him to open doors. So we're in this kind of sticky situation and now we're stuck in this contract with our realtor until October.

[00:33:41]

But we're looking to move almost now. We're on baby seven, four and five now. And so we're wondering what can we do to get out of our contract without hurting feelings, since it's my husband's friend as well as hopefully not paying fees to get out of our contract? I'm not paying a fee and done his job. So let's just take that off the table, but Sarah, are you saying the contract has fees and you're asking about is that they signed a contract saying if they buy a house, that he gets paid, but he's going to release you from that contract because he's not done his job because you've had him since October, right, Sarah?

[00:34:27]

Yes, and it's a one year contract. I know, but that's just B.S., OK, so your husband just needs to call his buddy and go, look, George, sorry, man, I love you, but you suck as a realtor. And so we're still friends. But you're going to send me your email right now, releasing me from this contract. I'm done now.

[00:34:46]

He can be nicer than that. As I say, he needs me nicer. Sorry, I know.

[00:34:49]

But I mean, that's the bottom line, right? If he's your friend, he should let you out because he had done his job. If he doesn't, I'm going to his broker. Goondas managing broker Amarice Kane. OK, by then, the friendship's gone, by the way, yeah, and so I think the goal here is not to lose the friendship over the home. I mean, the of the situation. So the OK, Dave just gave me a face.

[00:35:16]

OK, no, seriously, though, I think sitting down, I mean, I'm thinking if I'm in his position and one of my best friends had something and I signed on with her, she didn't do her job. I think I would sit and be like, hey, listen, we had to go by this for the best, for the good of my family. We're going to have to move on to something else because we have to do this.

[00:35:31]

And like and I wish it worked out, but it didn't. And so my goal here is to save the relationship. I don't want to be awkward. So I'm going to just say it out loud. This is what we're dealing with. And, hey, how can you help me get out of it? Yeah.

[00:35:41]

And if you do that and they don't let you out, then you didn't have a friendship to start with. Yeah. I mean, you don't let you out of it. That's weird for sure. For sure. I agree with that. Yes. I mean reverse the reverse the shoosh.

[00:35:53]

OK, you didn't do your job and your friend came to you Sarah.

[00:35:58]

You would let them out. Right? Right. I would to. Absolutely.

[00:36:03]

Do you feel like that conversation will go OK with your husband in the front? I would think so, yeah, I know my husband's nervous about it. Yeah, sure, I understand. I'm nervous that your husband signed a contract with this guy in the first place. So now your husband has to clean this mess up. He needs to sit down with this guy tomorrow and have a cup of coffee tomorrow, which as a sidebar to this is a great point that we always talk about, your home is one of your if not your largest asset that you have in your life.

[00:36:35]

And so many people do this. They have a friend, they have an aunt, they have a dog walkers, grandmother. I mean, it's just like the craziness of people that let people sell their homes, which is their largest assets, which is a huge mistake. That's one reason we have l.p, our endorsement of local providers for real estate agents across the country, because it's like you need someone good. And I think I mean, we've been in positions where friends, you know, want to offer their services.

[00:36:59]

But it's a big deal financially. And we're like, I'm so sorry. I'm so thankful you're willing to work and go this other route, though. And and so just be so mindful, everyone out there listening that when it comes to your home, get someone that is good, because, again, this is a place that almost anyone can become a real estate agent. I mean, you take a few classes and all that, not to downplay the industry, but it's really easy.

[00:37:19]

So a lot of people get into it that aren't that good.

[00:37:21]

And you can get a real estate license getting a real estate license.

[00:37:26]

A monkey can get a real estate license. It doesn't make you it doesn't make you a real estate agent because you got a license. And so, you know. Yeah, you've got it. You've got to break this out. Rachel is exactly right. It's too large a thing. So here's the thing, Sara.

[00:37:41]

Big deal, your family, your home purchase, little deal, hubby's friends, feelings are hurt, really, I mean, so you need to sit down with him, give him every opportunity to be a man himself and do the right thing and release you. But I'm just not.

[00:38:00]

Let me tell you, Rachel, we bought the lot that our house is sitting on. Yeah. And it had a lot of zeros on it. It's an expensive lot on a big ol hill. And I bought it through our l.p who brought me the deal.

[00:38:14]

Yes.

[00:38:14]

And he got paid a nice commission. I got a real estate license, but he got paid a nice commission. I didn't cut him out. He brought me the deal. And some friend of your mother's who'd had her license three weeks got all pissed off.

[00:38:26]

Well, kiss my butt.

[00:38:28]

I mean, really, you get no, you get you got no standing to be pissed. You didn't bring me into that lot or you dadgum right. I didn't. You've had your license 36 seconds. And just because you work out the wire doesn't mean with my wife.

[00:38:41]

I mean you get paid, you can save the house and the friendship. I believe in you. I know. Well, I'm still friends with that woman, but you know, my God, she's completely out of line. This friend of theirs is completely out of line. I agree. He hasn't delivered and he hasn't offered to release them. So, I mean, that's how this works. This is rocket science. This is The Dave Ramsey Show.

[00:39:11]

This is James Childs, producer of The Dave Ramsey Show. On your smart speaker, you can add our skill by saying, Alexa, open the Ramsey network skill. From there, you can listen to all our shows. Ask Dave money questions like How do I invest my money? Well, what is the debt snowball? Find out more about Dave Ramsey, Dotcom Smart speaking. Hey, if you've got questions about retirement investing or becoming an everyday millionaire, go bigger and broader with my man Chris Hogan on the Chris Hogan Show.

[00:39:38]

I am excited to be able to talk to you all week in and week out. We're going to focus on your calls and it's going to focus on building wealth investing and how to become an everyday millionaire. Subscribe to the Chris Hogan Show wherever you listen to podcasts.

[00:39:53]

Hey, it's James, producer of The Dave Ramsey Show. This episode is over, but check the episode notes for links to products and services you've heard about during this episode. Thanks for listening.