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Give it up for the great and powerful Russell Peters government podcast, The Joe Rogan Experience Train. My Day Job podcast, my night all day. Russell Joseph, my man, or live, we live with sort of life something, brother. Always good to see you. My family, too, thinks it's been a while midday drink and I like it sometimes you need it.

I had a steak for breakfast. I saw. You know something about that. Yeah, yeah. I was like, fuck it. I don't want to eat breakfast food today. I'll need a steak. What kind of steak?

I got it from Evan Funky, who's the head chef of Feliks, and they were preparing to reopen Felix's my favorite restaurant in Venice I've ever been. No, not phenomenal. Brian Cowen turned me on to it, OK? And they came in him and the owner, Janet, came in to do a podcast and they gave me some steaks, so I cooked one of them today.

They were is a t bone fat, big, thick T bone. They were about to reopen and now they got shut down. Did they not have a patio they can open?

I don't believe they do. And I don't even think you're allowed to do that now.

No, you're I think you're allowed to patio still. You're just not allowed to eat indoors as far as I as well.

That's when I went to the deli by my house yesterday and I went, can I sit inside them? Like, No, it's not allowed anymore. I go outside to sit on the patio, but it was fine.

They were going to do something at the Comedy Store where they were going to serve chicken fingers and just food and allow people to drink, you know, and just start opening it as a restaurant only. Yeah, I saw that. And I guess it's not happening now. They shut it down because right when they were about to do it, then they shut down the restaurants. So shitty. Well, it's it's real shitty, man. It's real shitty.

And what's extra shitty about it is, you know, they were almost out of the woods. They were right about to reopen again.

But because the uptick in California spiked harder than everyone else, almost. Yeah, a lot of protesters. And then Florida, there was a lot of protesting.

Yeah. People want to pretend it's not the protesting. I'm a hundred percent for the protesting, don't get me wrong. But I'm also 100 percent for freedom America.

I'll tell you what, boy. Yeah. I mean, look, it's just natural, man. You get a few sick people and you get 10000 people, 50000 people huddled together. People are going to get sick.

Yeah. And they're that close yelling at each other, you know, yelling, literally screaming.

So it's spit flying, apparently, particularly at nighttime is when it spreads because Brett Weinstein, who's a biologist who's on the podcast I saw that sent me a paper that said that there's a recent study that shows that covid-19 dies almost instantly when it hits online.

Yeah, that's why it's ridiculous. They closed the beaches. Yeah. That's where you should want everybody, right?

Just stay away from each other. Just socially killing covid right. Where you mask when you're getting up and leaving. And then when you're sitting down, stay away from everybody and everybody is fine. It's not it's not rocket side. The problem is that people are not going to listen, you know.

Yeah, but I mean, still, I mean, fucking you got a much better chance of a dying out there by the beach. Yes. Yeah. And, you know, Fourth of July weekend they did. And it's only going to rile people up further.

Yes, yes. Yes. It's I mean, I'm really worried about this state a really.

And it's a state of California or the state of the country. Well, the state of the country for sure. But California in particular, because so many cases and then the homeless population, if you ever been you've been by Brentwood lately.

Are they have they moved them all there? Now they've got a fucking tent village set up there, Jimmy, see if you can find photos of that.

They used to have them under the bridges here in the valley my friend Matt was talking about.

He works down there and he was telling me how insane it is. It's like they're never going to leave this. They're like they have it set up now. They have like a community. Yeah. And then you have to stay socially distant inside the tent community. And a bunch of people don't want to follow the rules. So they're outside the tent community. So you have fences. So you have the people inside the tent community that are set up with, you know, six foot distance.

So it's basically an acre way under the bridge now. Yeah, well, it's on the bridge.

They they're using the veterans something or another, the VA. They have some some large yard. Right. And then outside of the fence they have the people that are rule breakers. So they set up their tents just outside. They like, fuck you pussies, we're over here making out like they don't want to have any rules. So they don't want to deal with the socially.

Just if you're inside the tents that they've set up and created for you, you have to follow the rules.

So those are probably the ones that are following the rules are probably the homeless people that just, you know, took a bad turn financially. And then the other ones that are acting up, probably the drug ones, L.A. is getting a government run tent city.

All it took was forty years and a pandemic.

But they're saying that like it's a good thing. Yeah, like finally, yeah, that's what they're saying, but, you know, this is going to first of all, this is going to crush property values. This isn't this is in Brentwood. Not that property values are the most important thing, don't get me wrong. But they're an important thing, especially in that neighborhood. Yeah, that's a very valuable neighborhood.

And if someone has invested all of their money into their home and they're hoping to sell their home, and then all of a sudden the home values drop radically because nobody wants to live right next door to a tent city, see if there's any photos of that fucking thing, because the photos are pretty dramatic.

Maybe they're trying to hide it because they're trying to make it.

You know, that's one of the things that everybody sugarcoat and everything on here they're sugarcoating.

And then there's and then there's the fucking over reactors. It's a very insane time.

Yeah. You know why people overreact, though? It's because it's not the same for everybody.

Like, I have a friend who got covid. He's 37. He was clear of it in three days and three days. You felt like shit. He couldn't smell it. Couldn't taste. Three days later, he was on xpac and something else and just stayed home. And he got vitamin Ive's every day. And then three days later, he's going on a 25 mile bike ride.

Three days, three days. He's fine. I don't know if it's a good idea to go on that bike ride, by the way.

Yeah, but I want to see what happens. I'm not saying anything. I hope he wears a mask. Yeah.

I want to see if it makes him feel like shit if he goes on the bike ride or if he feels great. I was talking to DL because, you know, he just got. Yeah, I saw that was really scary.

And he was like, oh, I got nothing. He's fine. Yeah. They said I felt nothing the entire time.

Well, he coughed a little today. He had a video, a little bit of video. He was hilarious. He's like, oh my. Is acting.

Yeah. Yeah. So he probably smoked a joint right before that. Probably. Right.

But it was scary watching him just slump into unconsciousness on stage. And whoever that guy is that caught him, that guy's a fucking hero.

That's his road manager. Think his road manager is a fucking hero because if DL fell, he would have smashed his head on that stage. And you got real problems then.

Yeah, because he was just sitting there and he he slurred his words and the audience was like, why the fuck did you just say like they couldn't understand what he said. You saw the video?

I did not see the video. Let's see if we can find it.

It's it's I only just found out there was a video of it like two nights ago because Cedric was at my house.

D.L. is a fucking great guy. He's a great guy. He's a great guy. I used to open for him. You know that. And to know twenty three years ago, he's smart as fuck to a really smart guy, but a really good guy, too. Yeah, really good guy and really honest and.

Yeah. And I open minded. I think the a lot of the here it is right here.

So he's on stage and I guess his road manager fella that that guy over there gives him a drink of water, he puts the water down and he's this doesn't have any volume unfortunately.

There goes. There goes. He made it four days along and we came back. I remember I want to give it to me pigskins because they were immigrants and everybody's like what I see now.

What you hear that what? But now watch. He just slowly starts slumping. Look, that guy that road manager is a fucking hero because that guy was there was a little bit.

But the what I was worried was a stroke, because sometimes that happens to people, first of all, the way they drag them off the fucking stage like, hey, guys, what are you pussies actually carry him? Let him finish his sentence. They're dragging him now, bouncing off the.

I know they didn't let him finish. Just throw some water on. Come on. What was the proper comic so we can get through this?

They said like, we have everything OK and everything. Like, yeah, right out of control. Yeah.

Nothing's on the Joe Rogan meets a crazy stripper. This is the the the real scary thing was the slurring of the words. Yeah.

Because he was at my house about less than a month before that happened. That one night on May 30th, I had them over with cigars in the backyard. Social distancing, of course. You know, it was me, Sedrick, DLJ Phillips, Duane Martin, and we just hanging out and I'm like, seriously want to go right now.

Uh, midday cigar fucking.

Let's go ahead and do a midday cigar and a little midday bourbon.

It's like binder. Give me these. He came over when he's doing that I own the documentary. Documentary. I said like Mike he's a good guy. He's a good guy.

The documentary looks really good, man. Yeah. I went to the store and did it.

Oh, did you. Yeah. That's probably the best place for you. That's good, because it gives you the energy of the room, you know. Yeah. He wanted to do it here though. He wanted to get he and I talking about it. Don't take that. Take that, take that. Take that. This is an interesting one that this is from Benchmade Knives.

You know, you get the coolest. It's a.. It's good getting. It's my move. It's my move again. Is that your movements are now really you don't move, you know, because of you. My other move is a inam choke. Had an arm choke. Yeah. And and so when whenever I get it I get in position for a change. I like Joe Hogan. Joe that Joe Hogan joke.

That's hilarious. Yeah. That joke. Fuck my neck up. I was using my neck so much to squeeze against dude's arms because.

Because because you flatten out and do that. Yeah. Well it's you're you're actually using your arm your excuse me your neck rather to hold someone's arm in place.

Mm. Mm hmm. So it's nice to hear that you've been training, man. Yeah, it's nice to have been training. Is it legal now? They arrest you for training. What happens?

Like you became legal and then I don't know if it's still legal, but I was doing it with Jezebel's and Mark Armstrong, whom you both know, I would imagine.

Oh yeah. Jase's great chase to run the Malibu place. I was going over there for a while. Was a really easy drive. Yes, he's a super nice guy, too, really slick on the ground, yes. Oh, yeah, really high level black belt. Yeah. And. Real technical to those guys that teach, there's something to be said about teaching. I've often wondered, like, whether or not that would actually translate to comedy as well, because teaching martial arts makes you way better at it.

When I got really good at taekwondo, one of the ways I got really because I was teaching all the time and there's something about that teaching break again to end up breaking it down.

Yes. Yeah.

My friend Brent, he was one of Eddie Bravo's teachers, one of his instructors. And he when I when I first started rolling with them, we were both like purple belts together. And then he started teaching. He quit his job and started teaching. And when he started teaching me, he jumped up like huge like he had made this like before we used.

I don't remember how we used to go, but it was close.

But then once he started teaching math, he became fuckin super dangerous. Man, I remember it was like a way harder role. I was like, holy shit, man, this is amazing.

And it was really just for teaching my my game changed training with Mark and Jay every day for like a month and a half. Like my game completely changed from how I used to just, you know, you old with me last year or so.

And I always tell people what a fucking gorilla you are.

I just like rolling with Joe Rogan. I go over old with a gorilla. It's what it's like rolling with a fucking gorilla. Well, it's not fair.

I've been doing it a long time. No, I know. But 96. Yeah. So my game was always just defend, you know, just defend. Make sure you don't get got. I wasn't going to get you but you weren't going to get me. Mind you, you got me. But but so that's what my game became after that as well. And then it just changed. Something happened. Then I became from defensive to offensive. Now.

Yeah, well, once you catch a few people.

Yeah. You know, the real secret is drilling. And that's the thing that people don't enjoy doing. People really enjoy rolling to really enjoy sparring because it's so fun. Eddie, Bravo. Explain that to me once a long time ago. He's like, everybody loves a sport because it's so fun, but they don't work enough time, spend enough time, rather, on really developing new moves. But if you spend enough time on developing new moves, then the sparring becomes so much better.

But you just have to be disciplined to do the drilling, right?

I do get bored doing drills. It's boring. Yeah, tend this way, tend that way.

But if you do it and you do it with sincerity, you have to do it like almost think about it like you're actually like you're actually pulling it off because a lot of times guys go through the motions with drills and they don't think of it as something that they are really doing. They're just kind of like, oh yeah, this is how I do it. But they don't think they're actually applying the choke. But if you could think of it as like this is really happening, I'm really passing the guard.

I'm going neon belly. They buck, I take the back, I get the choke. I think it in the top. And then you do it again and you do it again and you do it again. And then one day you'll be Spaan. And in that sparring, the same thing will happen. You'll pass the guard. The person to move, you're going need a belly. They'll go to the back. You take the choke. And it's like when that stuff happens, it's so satisfying.

You learn. I mean, the biggest leap from BlueBell to purple belt. And that was because I was hanging out with Eddie and we were drilling a lot. He was he was maniacal. You guys started at the same time, you know, he was way ahead of me.

He was he was really good before I started. He was a really good purple belt when I first met him. Maybe. Yeah, like purple. Yeah, right around purple.

And then when he went off to in 2003, when he went to Sao Paulo, he was a brown belt. He was really good, though, and that's when he and then he tapped Toiler.

And then when he came back, Qandahar, Caveman's Blackbaud, he gave him his own blackbelt. He did. He took it right off his back.

Yeah. He blew top two world champions. He tapped Gustavo Dantas in the first fight and then he tapped the Gracy. Look, it was crazy shit.

And then I heard hawks chased him down in the parking lot or something. You know, that was a different time. That was a different event. That was the that was the second time he had a match up with oilor. But it was you know, he was never disrespectful to oilor. It's just sometimes people get things twisted and then, you know, you don't see each other in real life. If you talk to Eddie Bravo about Joyce Grace, it was never anything but respect.

Joyce is a cop now. Joyce became he's a cop. He's a cop in Idaho.

What? Yeah.

Go to the real Joyce Gracy. I thought he lived in California.

Well, you can shoot people in Idaho. I don't know. I don't know, man. I mean, he's a real good he not want a lot of action.

I don't know. He's a very he's a gun enthusiast on Instagram is a lot of gun stuff. And I'm like, wow, I never really understood the connection. I'm like, you're a lot of the fighter guys that a lot of fighter people that I follow were all into guns. And I'm like sort of survivalist mentality. I would imagine.

Our newest reserve police officer spent hours in the rain going through training drills and completing the Idaho Post firearms qualification. Joyce Motherfucking Gracy the Ghost.

So here, if there is a Mount Rushmore of martial arts, there's only one face that is absolutely on there. And that's that guy. Yeah, there's not a fucking doubt in my mind. That guy's face needs to be on and short to in the middle.

Apparently they really can't. B, they can't be a Mount Rushmore of martial arts because there's not enough heads you couldn't even as yet a Mount Rushmore of me. How are you only going to have four heads?

You know, there's a lot of people that came in and changed the game. Yeah, there's too many people. You know, you have to have GSP have to you have to to division world champion dominated the welterweights, revolutionized the way people think about athletes training for mama. When he was at the peak of his championship skills, he was unstoppable. Man when he beat John Fitch, when he smashed BJ Penn like those days.

And then he came back after retirement and beat Bisping and beat Bisping in 85 and put him to sleep.

But the rear naked choke actually was better. He actually looked better after four years out.

It's a long time away, too. It's not like, you know, month off. Yeah, he's Mt. Rushmore for sure. Mighty Mouse has to be Mount Rushmore. You know, people forgot. You forgot. But you watch those Mighty Mouse fights back when Mighty Mouse beat Cejudo for the first time when he beat I mean, fucking the Ray Borg one when he threw him to the air and caught him in an arm bar on the way down. I remember that.

God damn, that was crazy. That Mighty Mouse when he was in his peak was something really special.

I have a friend of mine who trains with Mighty Mouse. This Indian kid who fights St Lion. Is he fighting for one of. Yeah, yeah. One of these. Amazing GORSHIN. Yeah.

There they have some really tough fighters over there and Mighty Mouse is still stomping them. Yeah, I'm hearing that one might try and start up by by the fall out here and really in America. Good luck.

I it doesn't make sense. You might as well stick to Singapore. Yeah, Singapore. They're huge. Are they allowed to do shows right now? I don't know.

But I think the rest of the world is opening up, but they're not letting Americans in and that crazy. Well, it makes sense. What did we do and how did we fuck this up? It's funny because, you know, America was the one that was stopping everybody from coming in. Now, the press was like, hey, hey, wait there for a second. What do you think it is?

Is it that so many Americans are overweight? Is it the protests?

It's the it's that blind entitlement. As a Canadian, I can tell you this. There seems to be like a blind entitlement with a lot of Americans where they I'm American. I can do whatever I want. I'm like, yeah, you can. But can you just listen to a little bit of reason for a minute? You know, here's why this is happening. And like now you're invading my rights and I'm like, I get that. We're all frustrated with it.

You know, I'm with you on this, but for the betterment of the rest of the country, if you could just wait a little bit, which just wish there was an awesome treatment.

So if you got it, it was like, my friend is thirty seven. I don't want to say his name because something he's talked about it yet, but he when he got it, you know, he was like a little bummed out at first and then two days later he's like this ain't shit. Three days later he was like no symptoms at all. Yeah.

I listen I did the test on Monday. I had your guy come to my house. Hmm. Well, he sent somebody and I was negative. I did the finger one, the blood one and the nose swab negative on all of them. But I think I had it done in January and I had like a like a brief one.

Yeah, but dude, if you had it that FDA approved antibodies test that concierge's M.D. users, they would catch it. I think that a lot of people thought they had it because there's the regular flu and there's regular colds.

It never goes away. You don't know. But you can. It's true. A human.

And then a lot of people I think a lot of the the testing results are getting marked wrong. You think so? Yeah, it's it's listen, I had a friend pass away during this whole thing from he died of cirrhosis of the liver and liver cancer. And because they did a covid test, they said it's covered. Related.

Yeah, that's what they do. And I'm like, come on, that's fucking bullshit. Because I spoke to the doctor less than 24 hours before he passed away and the doctor said he's got three to six months.

My doctor told me that there's quite a few cases of people that were literally at death's door from cardio pulmonary disease and they got covid and died and they call it a covid death. And he was upset about it. He was like, I understand, because a lot of these hospitals are privately funded, privately owned. And that's something I didn't really even consider. I just thought a hospital was like some sort of state run thing. I mean, I never thought about hospitals.

Did, you know? See, I'm from again, I'm from Canada where the government was free.

Yeah, well, they have they have to make money, you know. And basically this guy was saying, look, the doctors are doing their best. And it's not that they want to be deceptive and it's not that they're doing it anyway because but hospitals are like any other business. There's a bottom line. They have to make money.

And if there's an incentive for them to call something a covid death and they receive extra funds, especially in a time like this where they're really hurting financially, it makes sense. But it you know, it really highlights.

Why a state funded medical, you know, some sort of a if we had like the way Canada has it, like Canada is not perfect.

No, I mean, it's not listen, it's not the best, but it's pretty pretty that you have to pay sufficient for what you need it to be.

You need something extra done. Yeah, you might have you might be better off paying a little extra to get something done. But as far as like regular shit, you know, you get a cold, go to the doctor, you you break your arm, you go to the doctor.

Yeah, well. I have friends that have had like real problems, like shoulder problems and knee problems, like they need surgery and they've come to America to get it.

Oh, you know, that's that's the way it works. Oh, yeah. Same with my dad. When he had cancer, he the treatment he wanted or needed was in Philadelphia. Yeah.

So it's like a privately funded stuff, stuff that costs more money where the doctors get they have an incentive to become excellent because they can make more money doing it like specializing.

Yeah, but then the Canadian government still picked up the tab for it. Oh really. Yeah. Because it was a service that wasn't available in Canada. That's sweet. Yeah. So they were like, all right look. Got it. Yeah. That's a divisive thing over here man.

And that's where I get it's weird that it's divisive too, because it's like it literally benefits everybody.

You know why it's divisive? Because the people that are healthy at the time are arguing about it. They don't want to pay the people that are healthy at the time. They're not looking at it long term.

But you would think that these politicians would be forced to because they're all old is shit. Yeah, but they have money. That's true. They've been corrupt and taken money on the take. Like, I'm I'm a Bernie Sanders fan. And that's one of the things that I really like about what Bernie Sanders was saying. You know, Bernie Sanders was saying that it should be a fundamental right as an American citizen to have health care.

It should be a fundamental right as a human being anywhere in the world. Yes.

The way I look at it, I mean, people have all these little weird arguments about it. But my the way I looked at it was like, aren't we a community?

So if we're a community, shouldn't we if we're going to take care of things, we should take care of fire department. Raychelle, fire department tax dollars pay for that. You should have a police department tax dollars to pay for that. What about health care, education? All those things should be there should be all those things taken care of.

Yeah, I don't again, I've only been here fourteen years, so I'm learning about the education system now in America. Mm.

Well we started from here, we thought Obamacare was going to cover it. It's what a lot of people thought when you know, when Obama was talking about it and they were trying to get the Affordable Care Act passed and get everything, we thought, oh, there's going to be it, we're going to be we're going to be cool. But it seems like, you know, what is it, nine years later? It's like twelve years later, it's how many years is it now?

Well, he's been gone. When did he start it, though? He started it. I had an eight year term. But why wasn't it in the middle or the beginning of a second term that one started or the end of his first term somewhere around there? So let's just say it's seven years old.

Yeah, it's still it's not much difference. It was a much different Jammey, do you know?

I'm. I know I'm a part of his space. I mean, is it easier to get health care? Is it better? It was some people got it taken away from them already because of Trump. Yeah, that motherfucker.

And then and then there was also the people that were against the Obamacare because they said it made their rates go up.

Hmm. Yeah. Yeah, there's that too. Yeah. There was a bunch of people that were doctors that were upset about it. They were saying it was too expensive for them.

There's just so much fucking red tape and it's so hard to be a person. It's like being on a movie set, you know, hey, can I get a bottle of water? Can somebody get a bottle of water? Sure. Don't plug that in, whatever you do. Yeah, right. You plug something in the union electric cars. Yeah.

Fuck, dude, it's so crazy. I did a movie last summer and I became friends with all the drivers because they were all Teamster guys and they were all Italian. And I just break their balls when we're driving back and forth to city fucking love me like, hey, it's like lunchtime would come. They'd be like, Hey Russell. Uh, Mike says, don't go to lunch. He got you a sandwich from our spot. And I'm like, Oh, thanks, Mike.

You see. All right. They were good guys.

There's something to be said for Teamsters. Yeah, it's we got a lot of people, man. I think that's part of the problem. Yeah, part of the problem. This country got a lot of people we're you know, humans are designed to live in little villages. I think I think can you get us into these big, large groups of people? Shit gets weird.

Yeah, well, everybody wants to establish dominance. Just a little bit of that, too. Yeah. And there's a bunch of different ways to live and everybody wants to establish that their way is the best way. You got to do it our way. Yeah. There's and there's no one way.

There's no one way.

Fucking Eddie, are you are you doing any shows right now. You. I did, I did Miami this past weekend. Would you do five shows. The Improv. Yeah. Wow. And that was the first time in three months.

No. A week. Two weeks before that I did the American Comedy Club in San Diego.

There was an open for that long. Yeah. So that was good. It was like seventy five people a show. The whole. Yeah. Comedy Store is open again already. Yeah. Yeah. It was good though. I had a good time and then Miami I, I was getting a little leery of the numbers and stun the stats coming out so I would literally stay in my hotel room until Showtime, go to the show, do my shows, know, meet and greet and bounce right back to the hotel.

Will you do anything to take precautions? Are you taking supplements? Are you. Yeah, I'm on a bunch of shit, you know. Yeah. I got this antiaging doctor that I see. What are you taking vitamins though.

Taking a bunch of a bunch of vitamins, like some stupid amount, you know, like twenty thousand or something like that.

Really every day. Vitamin D. Yeah. Or maybe 10000 to take 5000. 5000 I use. Yeah. I take to 5000. So yeah. Damn. Look at you. Yeah. I'm going to d hey wait a minute.

He works hard and he can't go outside. That's one of the really rough things. Right. The best way to get vitamin D is really from the sun. Yeah. It was fifteen minutes at a time or something but I get dark as fuck when I go outside. Yeah. And I got this stupid sunspot right here that I'm always paranoid about. What does it get. Darker and darker. Yeah. Yeah, it gets hyper pigmentation. Tried lasering it off a few times.

But again in California it's difficult when I go to these places they need a special laser for brown skin. Oh really? I'm like you taking a brown spot off. How difficult can this be? What is it from. It's just a birthing now.

I just it developed over the years. It was a tiny light spot. Look like a splash, but something dangerous now and then it just, you know, just hyper pigmentation. As you get older, your skin gets weaker, I imagine.

Yeah. A lot of folks get those weird little black like Morgan Freeman's. Get those weird little black. Yeah.

Yeah. Stick out. He looks like he's got black sesame. So this strange, right. Yeah. What is that. I don't know.

Again, I think I'm getting them from somewhere on my neck. I've got one of those now on him.

It kind of looks better though. Gives them that distinguished, distinguished speckled look. Yeah, I can do no wrong. Has he ever been in a bad movie? What's a bad Morgan Freeman is a bad Morgan Freeman. I don't like to see that he's like one of those guys he in a movie, I'm comforted, you know, like. Right. It's going to be a good movie, will drive Miss Daisy, and he'll do it with class.

He's got great hair, you know. You know, got a head of hair and a great voice, he's like our generation's James Earl Jones, not that our generation didn't have any James Earl Jones, but he's like our second backup, James Earl Jones.

That's interesting. You see, they're doing a Jack Johnson movie. Are they really? Yeah. Who's playing Jack Johnson? Mahershala Ali? I don't know that dude. Yeah, the guy from the Green Book. The Black Dude. Oh, yeah. Really? Yeah. Wow. Does he know the box? I don't know. Apparently he did. I think he did a Broadway version of Jack Johnson or something in 2000. Oh, no shit. See if you can find some.

That's crazy. About 20 years ago. Yeah. 2000 is 20 years ago.

Does that seem so slight, though, like he doesn't seem like a big deal, but he looks he looks a lot like him there. There is. Yeah. But Jack Johnson had those giant 13 inch wrists. Did he really? Yes. A massive wrist. I didn't know that. Massive wrists, huh? Yeah.

He was unruly. Oh, don't go back.

It says HBO Limited series. Oh, it's a series. Interesting. That's my favorite fighter of all time, Jack Johnson. Well, you want to talk about a brave man.

I mean, the guy was knocking out white people at the turn of the 20th century when he would punish them. Yes. He wouldn't just knock you out because he knew he could knock you out. Right. He would hit you in the jaw. So your knees book and step in and hold you up. And he would say, it's not your boss. Not yet. You're going have a long night tonight, boss, which is all he would hurt, hurt him and just hold him up.

No, no, don't fall down. And I want you to take this beating. I know that to me is like the ultimate fucking gangster movie.

I have one of those roots of fight shirts with him and it says The Galveston Giant. But when you look up how big he was, he wasn't very big.

He was like five, nine or. No, no, no, no. I think he was more than six feet tall. But back then he was a giant.

Yeah. Because his wrists yet big, you'd think you think he was only like 200 plus pounds.

Like a little like. Yeah he wasn't. Oh he wasn't much over 200. Yeah. Yeah. People just didn't have any food back then. No. He was though like his body was fucking he was the stories about him. There it is. Look at him. Six feet tall, 200 pounds.

And he was a giant back then and that crazy the Galveston giant fucking farms are bigger than his his biceps almost. Tammy did have some giant ass forearms. Yeah, you know, he fought middleweight Stanley Catchable, actually, in an exhibition bout, and Kitchell try to knock him out and dropped him.

And that's when he got right up and then knocked him out and his teeth got embedded into his glove.

Yeah, well, back then, when they had gloves, their gloves were like bag gloves. They were tiny little gloves, horsehair in them.

Oh yeah. And you could pack the horsehair down and guys would squirt water into them. They'd make like a small incision and squirt water into their gloves and pack the horsehair down to make it hard.

Yeah, it's a rough way to live those gloves in the leathers. Really cause.

Yeah, it's a rough way to live. Man Little Arthur Hunter, they call them to write. Is that what they call them, a little after he had a bunch of nicknames, Little Arthur? Imagine if you take a guy like that and train him today.

I mean, just the character that you would have to have to be the heavyweight champ in the world when I mean racism back then was probably magnified by hundredfold fight, 45 round fights and shit like how they always give him and Sam Langford and Peter Jackson and all those guys.

But he wouldn't give Langford a title shot. Why? I don't know. There's something something with that. I don't know what that was about.

But car accident claims Jack Johnson in 1946, that's when he died because he would he liked fast cars.

Oh, yeah. And what always is that famous story of him getting pulled over by a cop gave him a hundred bucks. Yeah, I told him I'm going the same speed on the way back. Yeah.

And then there was the other one where he apparently got into a taxi one time and the guy said, I don't drive the onwards. And and so Jack grabbed them, threw them in the backseat, got in the front, drove himself to where you have to get it while.

And then the guy's like, hey, what my fragos I drove myself and look at the he had like white wives back then to hell. Yeah, he did that on purpose. You imagine those chicks how bold you had to be. Yeah.

Back then I was probably hung like a horse to like multiple horses.

What I would love to see what the world was like, like at various stages in history. I wonder if one day they're going to be able to do that with virtual reality where, you know, I don't know if you've ever used any of those Oculus Rift headsets or anything like that. They're the really interesting.

They got one now with Alex Honnold, who's that crazy free solo climber.

Right. And, you know, he went up the side of a mountain with this camera apparatus on. So you literally looking at this climb from his perspective, it's fucking bonkers. But I wonder if they're going to get to a point. I would love it if they got to a point where you could go back in time, like you could go to like 1920s New York City and see what it looked like, hear it and said, yes, there's like videos on on YouTube about what the world was like.

You know, if you can go back ten million years, that's what it looked like. And then they do this and what the world would look like in this many years. Yeah, that's all speculation. But I guess the ones going back are more confirmed.

So think I just would love to I mean, it's you're never going to really be able to go there, but they're I think they're going to be able to simulate it in a way that's really, really close within our lifetime.

Yeah, they're on it. Yeah, they're on it. Especially now. They've got nothing else to do. Too much will work extra hard on it.

I just think would be amazing just to get a glimpse of what it was like, like seventeen hundreds, Paris walking down the street in the 70s, hundreds, if they could recreate it perfectly know while they're building something that's like, you know, you could be there when they're building the Colosseum or something in Rome, you know.

Yeah.

They don't know how they did that, though. That's the problem. Like, if you want to go back to the Parthenon or something like that.

Yeah, I think you're right. Yeah. Who were the who?

The crafts people. Yeah, because that's the thing there's a lot of again, that always changes, too, that's the beauty of science, is that there's never really the answer. There's what they think the answer is. And then when they find out the answer like we were wrong the first time. Yeah.

Do you think you're going to stay in America no matter what you mean about going back to Toronto? I know you love it up there. I love I love my home, but I got two kids here.

Yeah. I can't just leave, you know. Right. What are they going to do. Yeah, I'm going to bring two two baby mamas with me. That's right.

Let's not that's good luck. Yeah. So you know what? I got to lay in the bed that I made Buddy or start a reality show to baby mamas in Toronto. That's the name of the show. Yeah, right.

To Americans in Toronto, to baby mamas and Russell Peters in Toronto. I got to buy three houses.

Fuck them. No, you don't buy one big house. That's how you film it. You have the east west. Yeah, I'll take the center because. Yeah, you have division. I'm the referee. I walk around with a foot locker shirt on all day. Yeah. You all meet in the middle. You set up like a gymnasium for the kids in the middle. Everything's fun and games the middle girls talk shit to each other. Oh, yeah, no, that's no good.

That's no good. I don't want that to be my life. It's already my life. I don't want it to be any further my life.

Well, you got to think of what a comedian is going to do if it gets to a point where there really is no more income from standup anymore. I mean, I'm I'm legitimately concerned that this is going to last a lot longer than people think. I'm definitely concerned. Yeah. I mean, you know, this thing kicked me and then that's pretty good, this whole thing. And the reason I'm out there doing dates, you know, putting it on the line just because I have to.

Yeah.

You know, well, you your income is solely from standup solely. And we all thought that was fun. Yeah.

Everybody I mean, if this didn't happen, I wouldn't even be in any kind of situation. Right. Yeah, like that. Everything's good. Yeah.

But it there's only certain people who really blossomed in this and you're one of. Well, Schultz.

So Andrew Schultz figured out how to do covid comedy better than anybody. His videos that he does on Instagram, on the phone saken. Amazing. I watch every single one of those and I'm like, God damn, this kid's good.

They're so good, they're so well-written and they're so fast. And the pace and just his timing and his insight and he does a little little blind jokes.

And this I like when he takes a little jabs at everybody else. He's a he's a wizard at this stuff. Yeah. Yeah. How old is Andrew since thirties.

Thirty six. You know, just old enough to be smart enough. He knows what the fuck he's doing. Yeah. But still young and wild. You know, he's one of those, there's a few of those guys that are coming up that are in this day and age with social media and cancer culture. It's very hard to be a wild comedian. Yeah.

You know, in our day when we were first starting, there were no rules. There was no rules. Fucking Wild West. You were wild because everybody else was wild and that was what you enjoyed. Like, I enjoy wild comedy. I've always enjoyed Kinnison and prior. And when Joey Diaz is going off, like, that's that's my favorite. That's what I like, you know? And so that's what we all did. But to be a guy like Schulz today is it's a lot riskier to be Tim Dillon today.

A lot riskier.

Yeah. These guys. But they figured it out, you know, because they're from the culture that is canceling people so they know the inside of it. They know like they kind of know the lines in it. Mm.

They know how to move though. That's what's weird. Yeah. I mean the lines are very blurred. Right. Yeah. And I keep thinking, you know, I say it on stage too, but I'm like, you know, if they're going to cancel it for what you're saying, they're not paying attention to intent. They're not looking at the look in your face. When you say something, they'll look in your eyes. I don't you know that there's a lot of kadence involved in a lot of things that you say that it is all sitting right out it.

And then I even said if I was to read a transcript of everything I said tonight, I'm like, this guy's a piece of shit and let's get rid of him.

This is also temporary thoughts that go down as permanent record. You know, when you're especially if you're doing a podcast, you're just riffing, you're talking shit. You're trying to make each other laugh.

And if you take that and make it a permanent record like this is how this person feels, wait till you see whatever when this one airs, how many people get that son of a bitch, get the fuck out of America if you don't like it here, that's what I'm going to hear. You're gonna get a lot of that. And I'm like, no, you fuck. I love that. One bad thing about America, though. Well, no, the minute you say anything and you're not American, you automatically get the fuck out is what you get.

What do you have to do to be American?

American, you have a green card do to make the. I've got to get a tattoo. You need an eagle tattoo, an eagle with a dick shaped like a gun.

How about that? Wearing a gay. Yes, I like it.

But the guy is kind of originally Japanese.

I know, but I think I just in honor of OK, American Eagle with a GI American Eagle. Do you have any tattoos? None. None thought about it. I think about it now and then. I remember when you had none.

I had one we had one little one on my shoulder. Yeah. And that was like in the past ten years, you've definitely done a transformation.

Well, what I did was I wanted to get a sleeve and I did want it to be patchwork, so I wanted to do it all one piece. So I went to Aaron Dellavedova down at Garu Tattoo in San Diego. We planned it out and he drew all these sketches of what it would look like. And you know, it was a thought out thing. What was it. What is your sleeve.

Well it's first one's a long drag and it's wrapped around this Budha that's holding a DMT molecule.

It's pretty walcher. Yeah. I just wanted I wanted art, you know.

Yeah. And everybody's like, oh, you got a tattoo. You're going to keep it for the rest of your life. Well, that's not that long. Yeah. Guess what you know. Yeah.

Like what's better old skin people are going to look like when you're old. I guess what all old skin looks like shit. Yeah. I at one point wanted a boxing glove holding a microphone. I'm glad I didn't do that. No, I'm not great because I never got it.

Every time somebody would draw it for me, I was like, it doesn't look good. When I was in high school, everybody had a fucking Tasmanian devil with boxing gloves.

That was the thing. I don't know why then it became the tribal art became the. Oh, yeah. Or barbed wire around your bicep. Yeah, yeah. Or your ankle if you're a gal or a dude who likes dudes.

Yeah. And then they would do like the tribal zigzags all over their back. And I'm like, listen, you can tell that's like a time stamp on you now. Yeah. So you, you were you were really big into tattoos 10 years ago, were you. Yeah.

The tribal thing is weird. Right. Like why did that come in and go out? Because it was white guys doing it who were never part of a fucking tribe.

It can't be tribal if you were never in a tribe. It's so true. Like, why do you have tribal you know what tribe you from?

I'm fucking Los Feliz, bro.

I'm from a Tribe Called Quest. And that's so true.

Why guys would know tribe because the tribal people still do it. Do they though. Not like those kind of I mean like the Maori tattoos and all that. Yeah. Yeah that's it. That's defrays. Yeah that's different. That's like real hardcore tattooing. Well they tap it in there too. Yeah. They, a lot of guys like there's a bunch of UFC fighters tied to a vassa who has that shit from his waist down like his legs. He's got like shorts made out of it.

You know, a lot of those guys, they do it tapping. So they lay there and the guy has the stick.

You see the tapping. Yeah, it looks painful as fuck. It's got to be never done it in my body. Sturgell, he has one of those.

He's got like a quarter sleeve that he's just like that. His name is Sturgell. Sturgill Simpson.

That's a legit that's another in there and one of the name of Sterling and Virgil.

And they're like, OK, we're going to go em sturgell. Yeah. It's a good name for him. It's perfect. He's Sturgell and he's got one of his tattoos he got from a Japanese master. And that's how they did it with the tapping. Yeah, it's a long, laborious process, but that's a thing like a lot of people that are real Japanese tattoo aficionados, they'll go to Japan to get tattooed. So the Yakuza gets it right?

Yeah, some of them, I'm sure some of them get it the other way now, but they they can do shit with tattoos now. It's like it's the art form has has evolved this to this crazy place where they can do like photo realistic tattoos. Now, that's incredible. Ever seen Steve Boutcher? You know, that dude is.

No, but I've seen some of the guys that have your logo tattooed on them to and it's incredible how fucking realistic I stopped posting them on Instagram because I was getting so many of them.

Yeah. And then someone posted.

Yeah, that's Steve Butcher. He did. That's that's insane. It's insane. Well, he's insane, period. He's really fucking talented.

Somebody got somebody got like Michael Jordan. See, I would do some dumb shit like that if I got a tattoo.

Probably, you know who's great to go to?

Ash Lewis Ash. Ash Lewis tattoo. He's got some amazing shit, too.

And there's that whole style of tattoos.

And Stanley, look at that. Yeah, that's really incredible. When they get the like. Yeah, I get that Stanley one. Jamie, let me take a look at that. Look at that. When, like, if I was incredible, if I was to do what I would do one like that.

Like a photorealistic one. Yeah. Of both your baby's mama giving you the finger. Yeah. And one on each thigh. I don't know if my thighs are big enough.

Hmm. Oh yeah.

Robyn Williams. Amazing. Yeah. But he got the worst movie ever. Patch Adams. That's hilarious. That has to be a joke like Patch Adams ever seen Patch Adams. I didn't watch.

I mean I probably did at the time, but I don't remember it. It's I don't remember the premise. It's something really ridiculous. Like a clown that works with cancer patients or something. Something along those lines.

Yeah. Yeah. No, he was he was a doctor who would who would use it was based on a true story, would you say, Jim? Yes. Yeah. It was a doctor who would come in and do silly things to make the patients laugh to try and help their spirits. Yeah, but it was bad because they all died anyway. Yeah but they died with great spirit.

Hmm. It was a really happy death. They had he was a rough one man. When that guy hung himself, I was like, yeah, you know, I never got to meet him.

I met him once at the Improv was crazy. I didn't know I was meeting him until like five minutes into the conversation, I realized it was Robin Williams.

How long ago was that? Years ago. Obviously, he's dead. Yeah. So not not recently.

No, I don't remember. But I did a show at the Improv. It was quite a few years ago. It was during the time of the podcast. I did a show at the Improv and then afterwards I'm shaking hands of people and taking pictures. And this very slight older man with a beard, a heavy beard wearing a baseball hat comes up and he's like, really complimentary. But he obviously knows a lot about standup. He's asking me questions about writing and questions about, you know, like certain bits, like really laughing and.

And then I'm like, holy fuck, this is Robin Williams, like I was like, Oh, thanks, man, I really appreciate it. That's really cool. And I just think he's some cool guy. And then I realized in the middle of the conversation, this is Robin fucking Williams because he's had this crazy thick ass white beard. You guys grew a real bushy beard and he was hiding, man.

You know, I think for a lot of folks that are like real sensitive and he's obviously a real sensitive guy, that that place of being that famous is fucking overwhelming, that famous and known for whether you are or not.

But you're known for being always like on. Yeah. And then there's the pressure of having to be on now. So you don't disappoint the illusion. Yeah. And that's got to be fucking taxing.

It's got to be always on. And then just also, you know, it's just there's just the pressure of everyone recognizing you everywhere you go.

And I think one of the best recognitions I got was Bob Newhart. Oh, that's of 10 years ago.

He I didn't even know he knew I existed, but he invited me to be he was getting inducted into the Television Hall of Fame for 50 years in the business or something. And and he wanted me to be there on behalf of the younger generation. And I'm like, are you serious? And I remember I sat with Fred Willard and Mannix, what's his name? Tom Connors and Chuck Connors. OK, yeah, I sat beside them while we were doing and I was like, this is incredible.

And then that they had a private dinner after and it was and I was sitting at the table, Fred Willard, and then the guy that was on Bosom Buddies with Tom Hanks. Oh, wow. And then where's that guy?

Peter Scolari. And that's it. Oh, yeah. Right. And then and then Don Rickles was there and Bob was just so fucking he's still alive. And I actually been meaning to call him just to check in on the guy, but but he was so funny. I remember he was about to make got up to make a speech. It was like this private dinner we had get set to make a speech. And this woman is like, Bob, is this going to be funny?

Is this a funny speech? And everyone's like, who is this broad yelling? It's going to be funny, Bob, Bob, it's going to be funny. And Bob Newhart just goes, Why don't we all find out together?

Like, fuckin perfect. It's perfect for the perfect response is perfect. It wasn't like I said, I was like, why don't we all find out together?

That is just that's some people. It's like a m. talking, you know. Yeah. I mean, it's a lob she lobbed and he smashed it. Yeah. Yeah. Some people are just so dull minded. Are we going to be funny like she needed it. No.

She needs to know from him. Yeah. Yeah.

That's how she would react to this. You know who's the first famous person that came to your show. Oh no, I don't remember the first payments. Well, back in the mid 90s, the Raptors used to come to my shows in Toronto, a lot of them, because we would do this black comedy night once a month. Kenny Robinson had the Nubian disciples of Pryor all black comedy show was the ABC of NDP was, and it started in April of nineteen ninety five.

And those shows would sell out every month to the point where I had every gangster in the city come me. Yo, I need you to put me on the list. I'm like, wow man, you're fucking killing me, dude. He goes, you know, don't, don't embarrass me when I get there. Make sure I'm on. I'm like, oh no. And I'm like, I go, Kenny, I got to put so-and-so on the list and he's going to bring guns.

I go, I don't know what he's going to bring, but if he gets in and there's no problem, you'll have no problems.

And oh boy did you have metal detectors. No, there was a shooting at the store one night. I remember that.

That was a couple of years ago. The guy shot a guy on the patio a different time. Yeah, that's a different time. That someone that was a murder, that was someone came to kill somebody. There was a shooting in the main room one night, I think.

I believe Tupac was there. Really? Yeah. Yeah. I was off that night. I wasn't there was that that must have been maybe tripping on Tuesdays or something.

I don't know. I don't know. These are Fat Tuesday, oh, fat Tuesday. That's right. Yeah, yeah, and then Guy Tory took it over and had tripping on Tuesday. Is that what it was?

Yeah. Yeah. And then Chris Spencer took it over, Guy Torie's to get up in the morning and do East Coast Radio from his home in L.A., that's all I can do, that he would do it like five days a week.

I'm almost positive that he did that.

And I had Guy and Joe over at my house as well. We were in the backyard having cigars, you know, and Joe used to host Def Jam and he was jacked. Like what? He's still in great shape, you know?

So he does a lot of martial arts as well. Yeah. Did he do he did some some taekwando and he did some Greco Roman wrestling and stuff like that. No shit.

Yeah. But he was one of the first guys ever to be funny and jacked. Yeah. But he listened. He was one of my favorites. I think he's one of the reasons too that I talk to the crowd so much because I used to watch him do that and go I love that. Mhm. Yeah I know you hate when I do it but. Well it's not that I hate it, it's if I go on afterwards they want to talk to me too.

No see I don't get the talking, I just ask them questions and the way I ask them questions doesn't make, doesn't open it up for conversation.

It opens up to that. They want to shut up. Now I try to approach it that way like a jab. You know, I get it. I understand. I want to make sure you're good when you go on. I understand. I get it out of their system. Understand what you like to do, that that's how you form material, right? That's exactly that's exactly how I write. I remember you and I. Yeah, I feel bad.

After last time we had dinner, he yelled at me, you're like, just fucking stop being lazy. And I go, Listen, Joe, this is my process. Definitely didn't yell at you. Well, you know, you talk her. You said no, you said I can't write. And I said, you definitely can write. Don't say you can't write, you definitely can write. You just don't do it. It's true. Everybody, right?

Yeah. I mean I used to write, but I need pen and pad. I got to go do it the old school way. Yeah.

Well it's like for us we're also it's hard to just sit alone just to sit alone with your thoughts, but I feel like there's a bunch of different things you can do. You can write on stage which is great, you can write throughout the day, just have ideas, then run them on stage. All that's great. But it's none of that. Nothing's preventing you from actually sitting and writing as well. And like, I feel like when you sit and write, you have an opportunity to develop different concepts, different ideas.

And I get it. And I've been meaning to this whole corn team, but I thought I would be the most motivated guy. I think every comic thought we were going to come out of this quarantine with an entire new act that was so fucking well written. And everybody I talk to like, would you do nothing? I couldn't fucking sit down and do it. I didn't write at all. No, me neither.

I didn't write it all on purpose, first of all, because I didn't know how I felt, because I was like this was like when when this shit locked down. First of all, everyone thought it like a large percentage of us. We're going to die, right? Yeah. We didn't know. What the fuck was that? Nobody knew.

We saw the footage from China where they're driving on the streets spraying that stuff into the the buildings. We didn't know.

So we thought, like, man, what if we all like what if we're losing a lot of our friends?

I was worried about Diaz. I was worried about him, Dylan. I was worried about big people. I was worried about older people.

You know, Joey was one of the guys who checked on me weekly. He checks on everybody. He's awesome. He's fucking great. He was like my brother was checking on how's everything? Tell me something. Good cocksucker. Yeah, he's a beautiful person. He really is. I it is it is shocking. What a sweet human being he is. Yeah.

He's so gruff on the outside. The stories are so crazy that people get this distorted impression of who he is.

But Joey Diaz is a saint and you would want to think that he's going to want to hang out with everybody in party. He does not like that shit. It all gets the fuck out of there.

Yeah, too many people. I got to go. Yeah. One person has to be the wrong fucking question. I'm out of there.

Yeah, he he just likes to go in and crush and then get out of there like a legend.

Yeah. It's great. Still drives a Subaru.

I'm telling him like Joey please get a nice car, get a Cadillac. You make a lot of bad for Joe. Yeah, that's him. I don't give a fuck about that shit. Joe Rogan. What am I gonna do with a fucking Cadillac? What did you get?

Did you get anything to celebrate your Spotify thing? Did you buy a nice car for. No, no. But nothing. No, no. I have enough cars. Yeah, you do.

I think it's maybe a watch or something, something that says, hey, no, no, I'm just living like I always lived, just trying to concentrate on doing good shows, trying to concentrate on when especially when Spotify launches.

I want to just get real good guests and be prepared.

And I want to you know, I'm trying them on now before you start getting good guests. Got to hear you coming on this show.

I'm always trying to, you know, do my best. That's what I concentrate on. I feel like whenever I if I steer away from that in anything, I fuck up. Yeah, no, you got to just keep it what you're doing. Yeah. Just keep trying to do my best and not even thinking about all that other stuff.

I remember when they would be in your house, you'd walk in and it's right on the right hand side in the last room. A little office. Yeah. Yeah. That's, that was a studio. Yeah. Yeah.

That was the first time I did it. It was December of 2010.

Nobody was watching. Nobody. And you were like, I do it. I go, yeah, I don't even know what it is but I'll do it. We would have like 200 people viewing live now. Yes, you were doing live ones to Ben who figured that shit out already?

Well, that's how we started it. We started it on a laptop with Ustream. Just answering questions. You stream. Yeah, you stream. And then we moved over to YouTube later on. But it was it was just for fun.

The YouTube clips keep me very entertained on the road. Yeah. Yeah. I'll go look for a subject that I want to hear about and they'll be like a 12 to 15 minute clip. It got perfect.

Well, that's one of the good things about the Spotify deals with Spotify is going to do is they're going to organize things like all the health and wellness podcasts are going to be organized, all the fitness ones, all the martial arts ones, all the ones with scientists, all the ones on archaeology, animals, paleontology, all those all the different ones are going to be organized.

So you could you could actually search shit if you thought about doing a podcast. I have thought about it, yeah. Just the perfect time. Russell Peters. I mean, I really want to, but I you know, baby, I mean. So can you put me on under your wing?

Everybody wants that right wing just base or something. Figure it out and I'll fucking I'll tweet it for you. Oh, that'll help actually. Yeah. I'll tell people. I mean I, you know, I do on Instagram live a lot.

I'll, I'll talk to like, like I'll pull up like, you know, look who's there. And I'm like, oh look, there's crazy like some rock steady crew and all that. And we'll do like a live chat and we'll and it's not the basic. Hey, so tell me about breakdancing. We just have a great station and it's actually really good. Well, that's cool. And then I get like, you know, I'll have, you know, a rapper and one of my favorite rappers will be on or something, you know, and it's just fun shit.

You know, I was hanging out with in Houston, Willie D, I saw this really ghetto boys.

Yeah, dude, I hadn't done stand up in like 90 plus days. And Willie came down to the show and he's like this weekend.

Right? This weekend. Yeah. And he's like, what? Shosha I come to my please come to the second show. Yeah.

I don't want to bomb in front of Willie dear but it was even the first show was fun. It was great. It went great. First of all the audience was so enthusiastic. People are so happy to be out and so happy to do things. And the day we got there we weren't even sure I was with Brian Moses and Tony Hinchcliffe and we weren't sure whether or not we were going to even be able to do the show because we were seeing Brian Moses perform.

I don't think he could do the show. I just got back. I got on Moses.

He killed, but we got there and there was a stage one covid alert that they had moved back to stage one. And I was our phase one. I was like, what does that mean? And they're like, well, they're closing down all the bars. I'm like, oh, fuck. I thought we're going to have to literally get on the plane and go back home.

Yeah, but then they said, nope, we're going to just keep the shows rolling. And then Houston is Texas and Texas is different. They just have you know, they closed down the bars, but they keep the restaurants open a 50 percent capacity.

I really like Texas. I love it there. I know. Like, I think I could move to Texas, but I couldn't go where you're going to go. Where would you go? Dallas. Yeah, Dallas. I love Dallas. I like Dallas a lot. Or Houston, maybe. But Dallas probably more likely. I love all of them.

I just love Texas. I love the attitude I do. It's very diverse too. Like it's own country. Yeah. There's all kinds of shit.

And I think it gets a bum rap for a lot of things. I mean, sure, those things exist over there, but I don't think that's what it's about over there. Definitely not.

Austin. Austin is a really open minded, interesting hipster city. Yeah, it's an interesting place. It's I had a good time like going and watching live bands and shit in Austin. You know, they got some great music, stuff like that. Sixth Street. Yeah. Yeah. But I listen, that heat is intense over there. I like you know, I like heat too.

But dude, it's a fucking dumb heat like I but I'm like God damn van Indian guys complaining about the heat. Something's wrong with the heat.

Good for you though. Good for that moist heat it was.

We shot a movie there, me and Faizan, about five years ago. I haven't seen Faizan forever. Faison's great. You should have done you know, you'd have a fucking great conversation with. Oh, he's really intelligent. Despite his exterior. He's actually got a lot of he's got a lot of interesting, perceptive thoughts. Very, very good dude, too. He's a great guy. Solid guy. And you guys are in Texas. Yeah, we were shooting one day.

So one day we were shooting was like the hottest day of the year. That day was like in July and it was like 118 or something like that.

And Texas hundred and eighteen different.

Oh, it's not a good one hundred and eighteen. So we were supposed to at the scene outside, they were like, fuck, it's too hot. We'll shoot it under this bridge for shade. And it was a scene where these kids are breakdancing and then I jump in and break dance with them. So I had to like do a top rock and some waves and shit, but I'm like, dude, and an action and reset and like, no, dude, I'm going to fucking dive.

Maybe just so we shoot the whole day of this thing and I'm fucking dead like my shirt wearing a blue shirt. So you could see when I sweat and everything, then I'm like, oh thank God that's over. And they go, OK, we're relocating over there. You can do the roller skating. Sandigo on the hottest fucking day of the year. You're going to roller skate outside. Yeah, we're going to do it.

That's the thing about movies. They got to jam those 12 hour days in. Oh, yeah, we were doing 14 to 15 hour days because it was non-union.

Oh oh movies are hard, man. You know, it's not of hard like coal mining, but it's hard in that it beats you up a lot of comics that wind up getting into movies.

Their act sort of suffers. Yeah, well, it's one or the other. Yes. You can't you know, you can't be you on the movie set. Right. You've got to be that character.

Well, I was told everybody I bet that's why Eddie Murphy stopped doing standup. I mean, it's just like his his movies are doing so good. And he you know, you're more insulated in that world, too. He got too famous, too. It's like it's almost like it's a better way to do it.

Yeah. What do you think is going to be like when he comes back?

Who knows if he's going to I mean, is that a lot of money on the line for him? I'm sure he's got a lot he's got a lot of money.

But I mean, shit, I watched Norbit the other night, have been talking to people like you post about. Oh, it's fucking funny, man. It's funny what's coming to America the next night. Family movie night. What was that movie he did with Owen Wilson?

Like Spy. Or something like that, something spy, I spy. Hmm, I don't know. It was actually a really good movie. I enjoyed that movie a lot. He's done a lot of fucking movies, man. He's one of those guys where his movies don't get the respect they deserve for some strange reason, like what was that one that he did with Steve Martin Bowfinger? That is a fucking great movie.

Do you know the story behind that? Right. No, but the Heather Graham character was allegedly and harsh, I suppose, is based on. And really, that's what I heard based on her. Yeah. How she was dating Steve Martin. Then she ended up with a woman. Yeah. And then. And what did she end up with then? She ended up with Ellen DeGeneres. That's right. And then she ended up marrying a man after that.

That's right. Just keep it moving. Yeah. Whoever's going to take me, I'm good with it. I actually met her and she's very nice to so and ever happened to her man. I know she was shooting the series up in Canada for a little while. Hmm. That's where I met her. Wow. But, you know, the problem with Eddie was not the problem. What happened with Eddie was his movies in the 80s were so fucking huge.

Hmm. You know, it's like opening with a phenomenal joke and then the rest of your act, you can't follow it despite how good the rest of the jokes are.

But it's so many of those movies were still really good. They just didn't get the respect for something. Beverly Hills Cop, 48 hours come to America trading places. I mean, hit after hit after hit. Not like a little bit of a hit. He was the man. And then, you know, you got another 48 hours and then the Beverly Hills cop two and three. But even they were good. Yes. That was the first time I saw sequels.

I was like, wow, that's just as fucking good as the first one. But wasn't there like a time period where he wasn't doing films or they weren't as popular? And then you get films like Bowfinger and. Yeah. So I think after he did that one movie was like a. Like a military kind of movie and the late 80s, it was somewhere around try to branch out after Golden Child, it kind of fell apart a little bit.

Oh, is that what it was? Yeah, there was a pre or post.

My girl wants to party all the time. That was post. OK, so that was an issue.

Yeah, that was. But that girl wants to be different, you know, finace Henderson. Yeah, sure. Yeah. You know he wrote that Freddy. Really. Yeah, apparently. Fine. Fine. He told me he wrote it for him. Wow. He was hired to help Eddie with that back in the day. And because finace was actually a really big he had a really big song back in the day called Skip to My Lou. Really?

Yeah. It was a really dope RB track like early 80s. I remember I was in New York City and Eddie Murphy had that song, know, I was in Boston, I was in Boston, and Eddie Murphy had that song come out and I was like, this guy can do anything.

That was one of those things where, like when a when a person does like and Rick James produced it for him. Did other make sense?

Yeah. Yeah. There's some of those guys who could just kind of do anything. They could do movies. They could do comedy.

He's got a reggae album out now, you know, that came out like three years ago. But yeah. Eddie Murphy. Yeah. A couple of years ago, Eddie Murphy released a reggae album. See, I always feel like with certain dudes, like whether it's him or Jamie Fox or dudes who just have, like, this really diverse set of skills, they're probably just always doing something, whether you know about it or not.

Mm hmm. They got there just creative's that they can't stop creating, right, and then they get you know, I think the thing with a lot of people are creative and a lot of people. I think what you need is the what is this?

Eddie Murphy, the big red light featuring Snoop Dogg. Whoa, Snoop Lion.

Look at this. He's playing guitar. Yeah, he plays instruments. OK, we can't play any of it, but it's a flash. There's a little I'm going to have to go and get this now. That's correct. Well, I'm not shocked, man. I'm not shocked. You know, and I know he was thinking about doing stand up again, but I do not know if he's actually doing stand. So, you know, I was at his house in January of last year, January 2019.

Tiffany Haddish took me to his house. And it was this night that I was really not supposed to be there, I wasn't invited, but Tiffany was like, come with me. And I'm like, hell, yeah. So I went and it was it was this incredible fucking night at Eddie Murphy's house where I walked downstairs. The first person I see is Jamie Fox was like, Hey, man, what's up? I'm Jamie.

Like, and then and then I turn, I see Neil Brennan and then I and then I look at the bar and I see Sacha Baron Cohen and I officer sitting at the bar and I'm like, what the fuck am I going to see Kimmel? Then I see Bill Hader and then I hear behind me.

Yeah. Is this what you comedians always do, hang out with each other?

And I turn around. It's Q Tip from a Tribe Called Quest and I'm like, what I'm tipping in.

Like what the fuck is what if I walked into wow. And then Jeff Ross was there and then Chappelle came. Chris Rock came. Wow. And I was like, what if I fucking walked into.

But the good thing is, you know, because you were comics, we all know each other. And then, you know, I'd only met Eddie once for like a split second at a fight. And he knew my name then, but when I was when I walked in the base because hey, Russell, thanks for coming. I'm like Eddie Murphy knows my name, like, holy shit, Eddie Murphy knows my name.

I met him once with Charlie. I ran into Charlie. Charlie was so great. He was such a sweet guy. Charlie and I did a tour together for Machsom, the Bud Light comedy tour and with John Heffron. And then just randomly, I was in Maui and just Charlie was in Maui. And I went over and sat with him. And Eddie Murphy was weird. So strange, how was he when he was with Charlie for a friendly man?

He was really nice. It was like nothing weird about him and he's super friendly.

First words, he goes, You're a funny motherfucker. Yeah. I was like, oh, my God. Yeah. These are the things.

Yeah. Dude, I. I like that whole night. I honestly didn't say a fucking word to anybody. I was just in shock the entire time was just like I know every time I turn my head. Then I was standing in the doorway like that and it's it's me standing beside Eddie and then Chris Rock, Jamie Fox and Neil Brennan, and they're all trying to convince him to do stand up again. Wow. And I'm just they're like.

I have nothing to add to this conversation, like I'm not on Jamie's level, not on Chris's level, you know, Neil, credit spells. I'm like, I'm just there. But they didn't make me feel like, what are you doing here? They made me feel included. That was nice, but that is nice. But, you know, there was like I was like, I haven't done it in 30 years. I'm like, I'm pretty sure you've still got it.

Oh, he's got it. He said he said he's got about five minutes. I got about five minutes. But you know, you guys are out there doing it every day. And I know I know he wants to do it, but it depends on how he approaches it, you know.

Well, it depends on how he feels or if he just decides he wants to do it. The thing about stand up is that you have to do it in front of people. You know, you got to go out there and do it. And there's no theory to it, right? Yeah. It's not like music.

You can you could create an album, which is you and your friends. You can't really create a comedy set without being at a place where you're going to have random people come and pay money to see talk.

And that's the other problem he's got to overcome, is that people are going to be coming expecting, you know, maybe they expecting delirious raw coming out of them. Right. It's a 60 year old man now. Yeah. Yeah. He's got fuckin ten or eleven kids. I think he does. There's when not when I met him when I was at his house, his his baby was only maybe a couple of months old or a month old. Wow.

And then at the end of the night I got stuck in the basement of his house. What happened? Well, everyone was leaving and I didn't know where Tiffany went. And I'm literally standing against the wall and I'm the only uninvited guy there, really, dude. I mean, like all the Netflix people over there. And I'm like, oh, boy, I don't know what the fuck. And I'm looking around. I don't know what effect, if anyone and I finally like it's me.

And then eight of these kids were sitting at this one table and I'm just stand there like a creep, like right across from them. And I see Kenya Barris going upstairs and was like, can you don't leave without me. So I left. I went up with him. And as you walked up there, the door opened to suggest, just get the fuck out of the house. And I was like I said, the lady, hey, I came with Tiffany and she's kind of my ride because she did.

She picked me up and I'm like, I don't know where she is. And then they were like, oh, I think she went to the backyard. I go, OK. And I'm like, I don't like, what am I supposed to do with that? I'm not going to go walking around. The guy's out. Right. Where do you how do you get to the back yard? I want to check God. One of his sons is walking by, goes, Oh, I'll take you to the backyard.

No, thank goodness. So I go to the backyard. It's massive backyard.

And this fucking house is insane. Where's he live? Beverly Hills, of course. Yeah. But in that really exclusive gated community, they're like where Denzel lives alone.

Yeah. And these massive houses. Yeah. Like, I think I think honesty was about thirty thousand square feet.

The house. How weird must that be to be that guy to like, you know, know those people who those people are when you're young and then all sudden you're one of them people. It's listen, I mean, I'm still aghast from it a year and a half later, I can only imagine I mean, there's like an exclusive A-list celebrity group of humans. Yeah. And there's I guess like when a guy like him has a party like that, like, those are the only people that are just going to be semi normal around him.

Yeah. You know, he can't have that like Eddie is. This is going to be a funny speech. Yeah. No, none of that.

You can't fucking weirdos can't have any and that's why they want the same thing because I wasn't sure what I'm like. Am I going to say something stupid and be like, who brought this guy? You can't have any enemies. Yeah. And I felt too normal. Yeah. I felt, you know, funny. It felt like a mortal.

Isn't that funny. Like like you go to the comic story fit right in. Yeah. But if you go like when you're around too many celebrities, you do feel like a fraud.

Yeah. Well, and that's the thing to like you and I both friends with Chappelle, I've known Dave 25 years. And when it's just me and him hanging out, it's literally like me and Dave hanging out. Yeah. And then, you know, then you go somewhere and then he gets spotted by people and it elevates and then you become like, I'll be over here. You just carry on over there.

Dave took me to one of the weirdest parties every two minutes, Naomi Campbell party in the Hollywood Hills. And we we had a drive up to the house. And then you had to take like. Some weird elevator from the downstairs house to the upstairs house, and as we're driving up the upstairs house, there's a photo of Naomi Campbell. It's like 40 feet tall. It's on the side of this building and it's her naked. It's a 40 foot tall, naked Naomi Campbell.

And then you're riding on this elevator. You get up there, Demi Moore is there and Lenny Kravitz is there. I'm like, this is so strange. And Dave said, one of the funniest things to every man, I would never want to be this famous. I go, look at me, motherfucker. You the most famous person here. He's like, No way. I go, Yeah, you're the most famous person here.

And we were both laughing about it, like, you know, he became famous without real life or maybe doesn't realize it or maybe doesn't think about it, which is why he's so funny, because he just concentrates on just life. He's still Dave. Yeah. You hang out with him. He still has the same sensibilities about him 100 percent. Like when I was like when he was shooting half baked in Toronto maybe 24, 23 years ago. I was with him every day on set.

I would hang out in his trailer, hang out with his dog, had a little white Pomeranian back then named Thelonious.

And and I would take him for, like drives through, like to my hometown, Brampton, Ontario. I like because what the fuck? We're going to go I'm going take you to this magnetic hill out in Kaledin. So I took him to this hill. You drive down and the car rolls up. But it's a it's an optical illusion. I still can't figure it out even when you're there. But it looks like you're driving down the car rolls up the hill, you put your car in neutral and it rolls up.

But it's not really rolling up. No, it looks like it is and you can't unsee it. You're like it is rolling up. But then when you get out and stand there, you kind of see that. No, it's kind of on an angle. But because of the road going up like this above it. Oh, so it looks like it's going down, but it really it's not OK.

Yeah, it's pretty wild. I can't even imagine what that looks like. And then there's a road right there that we call the roller coaster road. It's like a really windy road with all these fucking humps. And we would drive play like drum and bass and and I would drive really fast over this road and feel like a roller coaster. Do you know they're doing a new one? What happened to. Are they really. Yeah. Shut up. Yeah.

Dave know someone's playing Dave son. Who, little devil? I don't know that gold is too old, but it would be perfect if I was younger. What is this?

Is this the road rolling backwards up a hill? That's not it. Not it. No magnetic hill. Not a tree lined road like that. Magnetic. But it is possible. It is very much like that. OK. It looks like that, and then you roll up and it fucks your whole head up. Hmm, interesting. But then we went out there and as a matter of fact, we're doing all the way out here and I'm like, don't worry about a man.

I'm sure you this. And we took him on the road. He's like, oh, that's it right there. That's that's actually it looks like you're rolling downhill.

You guys are idiots. Now you're driving. You drive downhill.

Now watch your roll up, rolling down hill backwards. What I think they show you, they put the car in neutral and then the car starts going backwards. Right, because it's going downhill. Jesus Christ. No, no. He's going backwards up the hill.

That's not up yet. It is. That is definitely not up. When you're there, your eyes will deceive you. OK, I believe you. I don't know when you look at it like this, you could see that it's Canadian education, you know, it's free. Hey, hey, at least three or four years, too. It's terrible. They're cutting the budget. That's one of the responses to covid. They're going to cut the education budget and you cut your salary.

Fuks I don't think they have a good salary.

The teachers do. They're not the teachers. I'm talking about the politicians. Oh yeah. It's not the teachers call to cut their salaries, I guarantee you that. Teaching them, hey guys, just take my money. It's fine. I don't think that it works anymore.

It'd be a sad time to be in school in L.A. They all have to wear masks and they're going to have to wear the teachers have to wear shields over their face.

I my daughter's been zooming the zoom and then my fucking ex-wife signed up for Summerskill. That sucks, dude, you got her on summer school Zoom. I'm like, that's not even. Oh, that's not cool.

Yeah, I know what you're doing. Camp for some kids, they're doing like temperature checks and shit and they're going to do camp.

Really? No, no, not her. She's doing. And she like the day before school starts. Daddy, is it too late? If I don't want to go to summer school and go, baby, I would never have signed you up for summer school, but mommy did. So we got to do it.

I mean, she means well, you know, the mommy does. Yeah, no, I'm sure it's also like think mommy's want a little bit of a break. I would have taken her. Yeah. You know, she's fine. She could have been with me.

Well, this is a good time to really bond with your kids. Well, that's that's what I mean. My daughter, like, you know, wants to be in my house 24/7 now. Daddy's house is the fun house that's fun, yeah. Oh, I don't have to shower till 10:00 at night. This is awesome. Are you going to continue to go on the road? And if you do go on the road, are you getting tested like every time when you come back?

Yeah, I think that's what it's going to have to go. Yeah, that's what I've been doing. I'm going to stop doing it anymore, though. I'm not I'm not doing any more road gigs, not for months. I decided after this Houston one, I was like, if I brought it back, I'm like, I'm just doing this for fun. It's like, yeah, we're doing stand up again. This is amazing. And then I thought about it.

I'm like, yeah, but if I bring it back, you know, like commercial and everything. No, I'm saying smart. And you didn't do any meet and greets.

No, I know I tried to do it. I just, I did it just for the experience. It was the whole idea was like, let's just go there, let's have fun. We'll do it for the experience. And then when we come back, we'll reassess. But then what would freak me out? It's coming back is like if I gave it to other people. That's the number one fear that I have. You know, I had your time.

I had your guy come and test me on Monday, Abe. Yeah. And he'll get it. He in 24 hours.

Yeah, he did the he sent somebody they did the finger one which was immediate and then they did the other one that came. I got the results the next day, which I thought was really great.

I've been tested on seven, nine times, I think nine times since this thing started. Been micro dosing at all a little bit every now and then. I want to do some right now. I've never done it. Well, you know, I'm the CEO of a company that does the micro dosing company.

Yeah. It's how do they do that if it's all super illegal? Well, no. So what it is, is it's a company called Red Light Holland, and it's the truffle. The truffle, so it's the top the mushroom cap is the illegal part, what the stem, which is the truffle is not illegal. They're going to jail.

OK, listen. So we're in the process legal.

We're in the process of getting it all legalized and done the right way. And it'll be available in in the Netherlands, first micro dosing. And and then eventually we're hoping it goes the way of marijuana.

Well, I think it can. Right now, everything's in flux. Everything's all fucked up right now, and particularly in California, Chapell want to maybe do mushrooms with them. He said, you got to do mushrooms. I go, I've never done it because I got to do with me and John Mayer. I'm like, oh, my God, that's heavy. I give John start singing. Yeah, I know you guys are both professionals at this.

I'm not I don't want to be the guy fucking crying in the corner. Are you nervous about it?

Yeah, I don't know what it does. Just do a little bit. Just do a little. Do a little. And your fun. Yeah. Yeah. You bit, you just try it out. You do a little. Should I be alone when I do it the first time. You should do it with a friend who knows how to. Yeah I would say just take it one cap to something light. You'll feel good. The mushrooms want you to like them.

And so the first time you do it, they're going to welcome you. They're going to be like, oh man, this is what you should be doing. Yeah, I'm going to straighten out all your personal problems, all these weird personality tics that you got, all this strange shit. The trouble you keep getting yourself into I can do to help you. The mushroom is going to talk to you. We'll help you. And then one day they're going to trick you into taking a large dose and then you going to meet the aliens and you're going to realize that this this dimension that we live in is it's connected to neighboring dimensions that are accessible through certain psychedelics.

And then once you see that you can never unsee it, you can. It's regular life loses its seriousness. It loses like twenty percent of its seriousness. It's still serious, still regular life, but twenty percent of it goes away forever because you know that that's possible. You know that these other worlds exist and that other people are just out there running through their entire life from birth to death. And they never experience those worlds. And it's that's that's weird because like, you're running around like I run into people because people know that I've done a lot of psychedelic drugs.

So I've run into people that know and they've done it, too. And they look at you and they'll they'll talk to you like, hey, man, you know, I did this because you like a buddy of mine said that to me the other day. You gave me the courage to try this psychedelic drug. And I was like, oh, shit. What was it like?

He's going to take he took the EMT and he's like, that's a little bit more advanced.

I would imagine him when this guy's a he's a bad motherfuckers, a Navy SEAL, and but never had an experience like that. He does have experience with it.

Well, I mean, I would have to talk to him more in depth. But what when everybody does it, you what you get when they're describing it is just sort of like trying to use words to describe something where there's no references. It's not the words don't work. You like you could kind of tell me what it was like and I could kind of go, yeah, OK.

I kind of see that because I've done it. But if I if I hadn't done it, there's no way I've known I have nothing.

It's like somebody trying to explain their dream to you.

Well, that's what's similar in this stuff. DMT is actually endogenous. It exists in the human body and they believe that it comes out in your dreams. They believe that when you're dreaming, your body is releasing some of that stuff. They don't they don't totally understand it. Right. It's one of those weird things where they they really only found out that mammal's created in the pineal gland within the last few years. The Cottonwood Research Foundation, which is connected to Rick Strassman, who wrote that book, DMT, The Spirit Molecule, he ran a bunch of FDA approved, I think I believe the only FDA approved tests on DMT were they shot it in people in a clinical setting.

How did you interview mostly freebasing it freebase it really? Yeah. Like a fiend.

Yeah, like a fiend. It's like a glass bowl connected to like a tube. And you light the bottom of the bowl. The DMT sits inside the what is the looks like a white powder like a white almost yellowish white powder depending on which one you take. The five methoxy DMT is white and then the other stuff was more like white with like a little bit of yellow to it. And you take it tastes like burnt plastic taste terrible. And you take a big deep breath.

You want to take like three big inhales. The first time I did it only took one and I just got to the door. I got look to the door of the DMT dimension. I was like, what is this weird? It was really weird, but I didn't even know what weird was because like, twenty minutes later I did a second one and the second one I took way more. I took.

Three big hits, and then it was almost like you're in a slingshot or catapult, it was like you could feel the tension and also and you shot through these colors and lights into what felt like. Some new place. What is your physical doing during all of this, laying there, laying there?

You know, one time recently I did like the last time I did was a couple of years ago. I opened my eyes in the middle of and it was very strange. So I can almost see reality. But it was all real pixilated and it was like I was seeing life through, like a dirty saran wrap or something. It was all was very strange. And then I close my eyes back and I went. It's the experience of the psychedelic realm is more vivid than regular life, which is real strange because it doesn't feel like you're on a drug because you're still you.

That's another part of it. It doesn't change your like when you're drunk. It changes the way you think, like you think different. This is not that this is like you think the same way, but you're being confronted with something that's insanely alien, just alien to everything that you know to be true. And then there's all these things around you that seem to be alive and they seem to be talking to you and communicating. The last time I did it was a bunch of jokers that were giving me the finger, like gestures, gestures with like, you know, they have the little bells.

They were all like shaking and give me the finger and like, spinning around, like going, fuck you.

They were mocking me.

And the thing that I got from it was like, oh, I take myself too seriously. I need to be mocked. And they were mocking me. And as they were mocking me, I relaxed.

And then they, like, pointed at me like, hey, you get it, I get it, you get it.

Because you can you know, you can get lost. You could take yourself seriously. And you want others to take you like what is the grossest kind of man? Like the kind of man who wants everyone to tremble when he walks into a room once, you know, rose petals thrown at his feet, he wants everyone to call him sir and be uncomfortable, everyone to be uncomfortable because he's a fucking man, you know, and that kind of guy responds very poorly to being mocked.

Right. So I think that it was like letting me know, like, hey, bitch, you got a little Latin.

You you need to get that out of your system, especially as a person who's a professional mocker. I'm a maker of things.

We are we are stand up mockers. There's a lot to be mocked. How long does it last for? 15 minutes. That's it. Yes. And what about the micro dosing that's similar with this video that you're playing?

That's it's kind of like that, but way more intense.

It's a vast experience called ayahuasca that you can I don't know how exactly it works. I haven't tried ayahuasca different.

No, it is a no. See, the thing about ayahuasca is it lasts longer because it's orally, you see, that's that's probably more similar. And you can get there on ayahuasca and DMT. It's the same thing. It's dimethyltryptamine. It's just when you're taking it with ayahuasca, your body is processing it orally and you take it with something called an MMO inhibitor. M0 inhibitor. M0 is monoamine oxidase. It's produced by your gut and it processes DMT naturally that exists in plants.

So like there's a lot of plants that have DMT in it. And if you just like if you were eating grass like some sort of like Volaris grass or something like that, it's really rich and DMT.

So if you were easy, you would get higher, you would get high. It's fun, but monoamine oxidase that's produced by your gut, it breaks that stuff down. So it's not orally active. So if you ate if you took some DMT, you would freebase and just eat it. It wouldn't do anything to you because your gut would break it down. But then if you took it with an inhibitor, preferably the kind of plant based M0 inhibitor that they use in ayahuasca, because they know like those MCO inhibitors that people take, like sometimes people take them as a medication.

Those can be dangerous. They're much more much more potent. And there's all sorts of weird side effects. I've heard of people taking pharmaceutical M0 inhibitors and then they take mushrooms or something else with them and they really can fuck them up like real bad because across pollinating their fucking drug use, you do all kinds of wacky shit to your brain that your brain is probably not really your red line in your brain.

Your brain may stay together or you might go fuck and shine on you crazy diamond, you know, going off the deep end. Yeah.

Have you had any any kind of experience with MDMA or anything.

Nothing. Nothing. Pot, not not good experiences.

Even the bad ones are good. I the bad part experiences teach you that regular life is ok.

I hit the the CBD before I go to bed. That's great with the with some THC in it. OK, just a little bit to crash you. Yeah. And I have the fucking weirdest dreams when I'm on them. Oh for sure. Yeah. So fucking weird dreams.

Just CBD alone. I'm so happy that that stuff's legal for folks with like anyone with arthritis or weird aches and pains. Yeah. Fucking CBD. A game changer really.

Especially the creams is them. You know Tyson's one is really good. It's really good. Right. Yeah. He gave me a bunch of it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll call car back. I need some more.

His weed is stupid strong. He's got crazy. Well, it should be, yeah, probably if you're Mike Tyson, you're way better not be fucking weak. Right, right. You can have Mike Tyson Wheatley.

What do you think about him fighting? I, I mean, as a person, I'm friends with them, but I'm also a fan. Yeah. And to see him look how he looks now is exciting. It's crazy. And I talked to you know, it's funny as I talked to him before, the video came out of him hitting pads and shit and we were face timing. And I said, Mike, you look at the map and boxing man feel really good.

And I said, that's that's great because yeah, man, I bet I in a long time I have a fight. I said what I go with. Yeah. I mean, I like exhibitionism, you know, you wanna work my corner to go well Mike fucking something bad happens.

Russell Peters fucked up Mike Tyson.

Well he'll have I'm sure feel Cordero who's been working with them, who probably have him in his corner, you know.

Yeah. There's talk of that John Jones fighting them now, John, just fucking around. I guarantee John's fucking around. He even said he would fight him in a boxing match as long as Mike would fight him and may fight, you know, he said, but he promised he wouldn't hurt him. He wouldn't break anything on him.

Yeah, no, listen, the boxer cannot go into an MMO ring, you know, not with John as much as John kicks your legs.

Yeah, John.

You know, John probably just wrestle him to the ground, take him down. It's like when James Tony find Randy Couture.

That was a rough one, man. That was a rough one. I kind of knew that change wasn't really training for that, though, he just took the pay day. Yeah, he's just but he's natural. He's naturally a tough guy. James Toney. Sure. Never been knocked down, you know, does for you. That gets you beat up longer. Yeah, it does. It makes your brain get really fucking messy. Yeah. You're scrambling those eggs.

Nobody talks better shit during sparring sessions. And James telling me, oh, those are my favorite.

There's so many videos and you got bitch. That's it. That's all you got. That's all you got. Come on, bitch.

I do. I talk shit when I'm rolling with people do it but I talk like funny shit.

Oh I could be like I'll get, you know, something will happen. I'll lose position or something. Oh that was a mistake, you know. And then and I'll do anything I can to fuck with their mood, like to make them laugh.

So I'm off. OK Jack. I do it. You know, I remember that when I'm rolling with young Jack, I'll be like, you were made for hitchhiking, not jujitsu. You see the people in the class like, oh my God, I'm like, we're friends. We're that's hilarious.

Banjaxed the godfather of my son. Is he really? Yeah, he's a great person. He's a great guy. He really is. I feel real lucky that I met him. You know, you could run into any jujitsu instructor. I just stumbled upon him because it was closer to my area, you know, it's closer to my house.

And then he turns out to be one of the best ever, one of the best ever. And just so technical, too, like just the way he breaks things down and his ego so healthy, like he's like real easy to roll with and. Yeah. And he's a rare guy that's like fifty years old that still rolls all the time, doesn't get hurt, doesn't get hurt.

It's kind of amazing. Think he hurt his knee for a little bit but it's got an asterisk. Yeah. Meniscus tear. Yeah. He never had to get it operated on that. Oh really. Yeah. How did he fix it. I don't know. It just healed. I guess he went to the doctor and he said it's fine now. That's amazing. Yeah. How's your shoulder. Everything's good man. It's all good when my fingers better will roll again.

Yeah. What's wrong with your finger. I fucking this middle one. I jammed it. Oh I got swept by Mark Armstrong and I went to post when I went to post instead of my hand hitting like this, my finger went straight.

Have you ever used tape on it like. No. You know, it's funny is I actually have those finger grips. Yeah. The the fucking ones that I use. But, you know, what you could do is you take athletic tape and you tape two fingers together to protect it.

Well, I usually have those on. Oh, OK. The Alutiiq here. Yeah I usually have it on and that fuckin one day I didn't wear it.

Oh I don't know why I didn't wear it that day and then that's the fucking day I did it. Yeah. If you jam one you can pull two together. Oh yeah. This one's fine now but this one's still really sort of like I'm holding a cup of coffee and it hurts because this angle, you know. Yeah. Just tape them all up.

So if you tape them all up it'd be almost feel like you have like one grip which is all you need anyway. You know, like you very rarely use like individual. Yeah. Oh no. Yeah. Just tape them all up, tape them together, get some of that white athletic tape or they have jujitsu tape. I think it's called monkey tape monkey. See if you find that shit monkey grip tape. It's probably a strong supply store.

Hey, I'm sure. But yeah, I mean, a lot of guys like that was Hicks and was famous for that. You go to see he's always injured because he was constantly rolling. So he had tape all over picks and everything is fucked in his knees. It's real bad. And he's got bad knees, though, doesn't he? Yep. Yep. Yeah there is. Yeah. Monkey tape. That's it. So that's tape just specifically designed for jujitsu.

The joint tape. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I should get the good stuff. I do need stuff. It looks really thin like.

Yeah but that's also so you can move it around the joints you know. And you know it's still solid. Look they know what they're doing. They have, they have thick stuff too. But a lot of guys like that thin stuff because you can get in between the fingers real good and tape it up nice. I'm going to get that zebra pack. You go get a little white, but yeah, I need that fucking that that shit hurt. I screamed.

Yeah, it hurts to think about you just so you're going to have to deal with. You're going to get injured. Yeah. And then one day I was rolling and I, I don't know my fucking my foot or ankle cramped and it just started to turn on its own. The muscle spasm. Oh no. My ankle was turning in on itself. It was like, did you break his ankle? I can't fucking stop my foot. It's just the turn.

It just a cramp. A cramp. But the muscle spasms in the my ankles kept turning in and like the fucking exorcist, I used to get cramps.

And then I started taking electrolytes, like regular everyday. I think that's what I need to do. Changed everything liquid I've got. It's one of my sponsors.

I'll give you some. Yeah I have some here dude. Changed my changed everything to complete game changer. Yeah. Because I used to get cramps, I used to get cramps and I was working, I just thought it was part of working out. But then I started drinking this stuff in my water before workout. During my workouts. Yeah I drink it after I get out of the sauna I get the cramp in the back of the hamstring. Their symptoms OK after electrolytes are everything.

It's so, so important for your body, you know, because hydration and electrolytes. Sometimes I'm trying to, you know, I put somebody in a body lock and then I'm and then I can't hold it because I get a cramp like, yeah, yeah, the same crap you get when you're fucking you know, that one. That one the fuck. Cramp the toe. One eye. Yeah. Yeah. The bottom of the foot. Yeah. The toad is the.

I hate this shit.

Yeah.

Cramps are rough but you can, you could do something about that and it's pretty quick like you know, you take that stuff for a few days and your cramps will go away. You can work out real hard and never get cramps again. Oh, I'm definitely going to take some off you. Yeah, it's potassium.

I mean the the one that I like liquid. There's a bunch of really good ones, but liquid IVs, one of my sponsors and it's got all kinds of great. Should it be vitamins, potassium taste good to flavor.

They got a bunch of different flavors.

They got açaí. It's like for the Brazilians. Yes.

My friend Parhar you could ever tell you that story. Which one? I think one time after I did one of your podcasts, a guy hits me up on Instagram. I was like, hey, so excited that you're doing jujitsu, man. I make mouthguard. I want to make you a personal mouthguard. That's great. Mandingos, what do you want on it? I go, Oh, I know exactly what I want on it. So I tell him what I want and he sends it.

Paula, I get I go I get to the academy and I go Jayjay. I kind of mouthguard was good. You're going to need it. And I put it in and I got on the mat and I smile and he goes, why do you want to come in your mouth. Like what. What. Because boy that means come I go. Why do you say it all the time. Does it mean when we say it. But that's actually what it means.

Like it means a bunch of things. Yeah. But the actual word means come in. I'm like, oh fuck, I never wore that thing again.

But it means different things like like Gilbert Burns, who's fighting Comoro Ousman for the title he always yells at.

After he wins, he wins, yells Paha. Yeah, because they they use it like that. But it means different thing. But it's the same way Malakai means jerk off in Greek. But they'll say to you, Málaga, what are you doing? Hey, how you doin, Málaga?

It's like that's like good ideas that you call you jerk off, you jerk off. Yeah, but yeah. But it doesn't mean it, you know. I mean but the actual meaning of this apparently is fucking come and he's like he's laughing hysterically. You ever see Jack laugh like that. It's pretty fucking funny. Hey, why don't you go put the come back in you. Oh that's a lot of the guys listening who made me the man. Please, could you make me another one that says my name.

Just deal with it. Just deal would come in your mouth. What's the big deal bro. Girl's been dealing with it for years, you know, just handle it. Handle like a fucking gentleman. Yeah.

Who's who made your mouth guard. I forgot their name. Oh, there's a guy, the mouthpiece guy makes dope shit. I wonder if that was him fit perfectly. This one didn't fit perfectly, though. Oh, OK. Because it was like it was a spec, I guess, you know, it just a spec, a spec one. He was like, he didn't measure me enough. And so. Oh yeah.

They got a they have to do the mouth print though. I had one of those before from boxing. Yeah. And I left that at my old guy who was training with out here. I left it at his gym years ago. I don't think I want it back now.

No, no. You need a new one.

Yeah, but what they'll do for, like, a guy who makes professional ones like the mouthpiece guy makes them for a lot of my guys, it's like you have this thing that you sit, sit your teeth like a dentist. Gooey, nasty. Yes, it's nasty. And then it'll form and then, you know, they'll put the top and bottom one or they can make a top and bottom one. Yeah. What do you like. I like just a top one for jujitsu, but for striking.

I'd like a top and bottom one.

Yeah I do need it now because I find them grinding my teeth when I'm rolling. Yeah.

It's hard to breathe out of your nose but there's a lot of real benefit to breathing out of your nose. The really is, you know, sometimes you going to breathe out of your mouth but there's real benefit to primarily breathing out of your nose.

And I'm reading a book now, I think James Néstor, it's it is a book that's about. Yeah, sure. Get in there, son.

It's a book that. Yeah, it's called Breath and it's by this guy, James Néstor. And I've been reading listening to it on audiobook.

How is your is your nose broken at all or. Yes, but I got it fixed. I got it fixed in like ten years ago and it made a huge difference.

My mind is still broken so you can't breathe out of it. Well, not properly. Get it fixed, man.

I want to know why you're on lockdown. Now's the time thought. But they're like, no, I can't do that right now. It's elective, right?

Oh, but I think they can do elective surgeries now. I think there's somebody and I know that you're right. You know, it's doing OK. Little struggling and Pakistan needs some help. Yeah. Go ahead, Joe.

Get your fucking monkey grips all over it. The kids fucking Jesus Christ, Rambo. I didn't think you pull that fucking thing out.

And a more custom knives in the house yourself the best shit. So don't every time you post something, I go so fucking cool like the fridge you post the other day.

Yeah, that's cool. Cliff, you got to try those things, man. KDDI drinks get your 25 milligrams of CBD with each each serving their fellow does do anything. Yeah. The CBD fucking great period.

Get as much of it as you can see from me. One hundred milligrams at a time really. For me it equates sleep for me.

Now it does that to alleviate the anxiety. But it's really good for people that have joint issues, really good for people with arthritis.

Things like I used to have really bad arthritis in my fingers. It seems to be gone away. I've been taking these Cukierman pills. Oh, OK. They came in curcumin. That's tumeric. The same thing. Yeah. Yeah. Apparently the curcumin is 500 times more absorbable. Oh. Like faster absorbency. That makes sense. Yeah.

There's a lot of natural things for inflammation, but the big one is avoiding things that cause inflammation. Like with your diet, like get rid of bread, take bread and pasta out of your diet. Little so many of your little aches and pains will go away.

I don't really have many aches and pains anymore. It's kind of nice. That's awesome. Yeah.

Are you doing just jujitsu or do you do like you supplement it with any calisthenics or weightlifting or anything. Well, no, I just do jujitsu and then I ride my bike now. Oh that's cool. Like five mile bike ride around your neighborhood or something. Yeah. Yeah. And I got that motor assist one so it's kind of. Oh the power system.

No it's good because it's fucking hills in my community. Our killer can't handle the hills. No. Hell no. That's where it's supposed to, it's where he's supposed to work. You still have to work. It's not like it's pedaling for you. Oh I know.

I got a buddy of mine has one. I love that bike. It's awesome. They're fun. OK, it's better to have a regular bike. Don't suffer. Yeah.

I'll take you know, I'll wait till it gets too easy and then I'll step it up from there.

You know, you just get one kettlebell. Get one. I've got one. I think. I don't know if you sent it to me on it since it's OK. Yeah. They sent me the Iron Man one. OK, beautiful. Yeah it's good.

That's a good one. It's 45 pounds. It's a good size. And they sent me one of those two of those jugglers bats. Those are fucking clubs. Yeah. Yeah those are great. I got weak wrists so that shit hurts when I. They're really good for your shoulders, really good for your forearms, grip strength, all that stuff. Yeah. Yeah.

We have a bunch of programs that John Wolfe, the Head fitness instructor on I put together for during this quadrant so people could work out at home with minimal equipment, these home workouts for six weeks.

The big get on that bloody well.

I was dropping good weight off the jujitsu. Yeah, jujitsu plus stress equals weight loss for me, really, regardless of what you eat. Yeah, I, I went from when I started back, jujitsu was 240 pounds. Which is fucking huge, you got big fat, you saw me, yeah, you knew I was fat, but you're just too fucking nice to say it. I'm not nice to everybody. I know. I but listen, you know what?

I don't know that because I've only seen you be nice to people, except for a couple of times I've seen some random stranger end up in the green room. You're like, dude, you've got to get the fuck out of here. I know, but I'm a big fish. Yeah, that's fine. Thank you. Can get the fuck out of my greenroom now. Get out of the green room. Well, there's a few of those guys who made it to the back of the main room.

Yeah, they just walked back there and then they would like ask for stuff and he'd be like, who is this guy? Yeah. What are you doing here? Yeah. Yeah. But that's the old days. The Comedy Store is pretty tightened down or was before covid tightened down with security. I'm wondering when they're going to open up again, man. Well, what do we talk in September? Weren't they late September? Early October. So they're saying now.

Well, that's that's what I had heard before this double down. Jesus Christ. Speaking of lockdown, that's what you tried to do to me when we rolled. Yes. And I tapped on the way to it. Well, you had in a cafe slicer. No. You thought it was a calf slicer. Well, you know, who thought it was a calf slashing my fucking calf? Thought it was a calf slicer. Joseph, I was just using I was going into a twister roll.

I was going to put you in a twister. Why would you do that? You know, you're nice to me, but why would you want to twist me like that?

It does not that bad. It's not that bad for the guy doing it. It's not. It's not.

I've been caught in a twister multiple times. It's just you you tapped in the roll. That's what happened.

Yeah, it was my cat, like, enjoy it.

But it's probably because you need electrolytes. Yeah, but what it is or maybe I don't need a fucking shin your bitch ass shins by the way, on my fucking cat, you just need to know how to defend.

You can't you can't let me roll you in that way.

Well now I mean now I probably have better defense for it. It's a natural instinct really. It's like what people don't want to do is give up their back.

Right. So if you're inside controlling a person, what they don't want to do is give up their back so they don't want to run away from you. So they roll towards you. Right. But when they roll towards you, you take that top leg, which would be their left leg. And I lace my left leg over and under and I lock it down. Then I sit up and I roll towards your butt. And then as I roll towards your butt, it spins you and I wind up on your back.

Yes.

And I remember. Remember clearly that's Eddie Bravo. That's all. Eddie Bravo Chikin Eddie. Yeah. He's trying to figure out different ways to get to the back and get to the twister and then get to there's a bunch of leg locks you can do from those positions, too.

I'm not really like locked. Yeah, that's it. Looks like Eddie and Andrea Schultz.

It does show, but it's not that tenter Gracy. And Intergration, my Instagram feed selling sweatshirts. Yeah, he made up his own sweatshirt. It's kind of a cool idea. Yeah, it becomes a backpack. Yeah. Like folds up into a backpack.

And it's like if you're on the go, I kind of get it.

But I mean, I don't see I mean, like, I've never been in that desperate. I'm like, fuck, this sweatshirt is killing me. What am I doing? You have no storage.

You don't have a car or a hotel room or something.

They'll give it to somebody. Hey, you cold. Do you look chilly when I wear this? Wrap it around your neck. It's a big deal tighter on your waist, I.

Oh, did you ever download that mix I sent you what, Max? I sent you a metal mix like an 80s metal mix. It's actually really dope. Why did you do. That's how in December I sent it to you when we were having dinner. I said jam and email it to you. Dude, I my brain is so foggy, you'd really like it.

Whatever happened from December on, you still probably in your inbox somewhere. Probably. I'll go find it. But what is it?

It's a buddy of mine. Scotty Fox is a deejay and he does. He's really dope. Really well put together mix tapes. Yeah, and it's not like a lot of there's no scratching, it's just like really well programmed and mixed to the point where you like that flowed from beginning to end.

Fucking incredibly, you are big into being a deejay in 35 years.

Are you doing any of that while you're in lockdown? Are you having, like, little parties at your house or anything?

No, I go on live every now and then and deejay for a little bit. But Instagram locks shuts people out when they're playing music and they try to claim they do.

Yeah, dude, they kick you off and they say you violated copyrights. And did you see the Risen deejay when they did awesome. Was that that was fucking amazing. And I love both of them. But but I really feel like Primo went easy on Rizza.

Oh my goodness. I do that. What you really think I do, I listen, I'm friends with both of them, but what are you trying to say? I'm trying to say that Premo had a lot more ammo in his fucking arsenal that he didn't use. I didn't understand it was a true battle. I thought it was just a performance. No, about it's a battle song for song. And it's like, oh, you got that. I got this.

And then really did pull out something. And I'm embarrassed that I didn't fucking know he produced it. It was a long kiss good night by Biggie. I didn't know I did that beat. I didn't know that either. And I was like, fuck, that's one of my favorite biggie songs.

It was just cool because you were watching these two hip hop legends that were making the most of the pandemic. You know, they were in the middle of this weird thing where everybody's at home. And so you knew so many people, like millions of people, were watching live.

Yeah, I Swiss beats started that the verses thing. And and then they did Teddy Riley versus Babyface, which was incredible as well.

The first one was hilarious. I didn't I didn't get a chance to watch the Jada fabulous one. Yet the fucking Beenie Man versus Bounty Killer was incredible.

What is this page, Jamie?

It's turned into a whole platform and brand, and now it's like I might even be a show and they link to Apple and what is the name it go up so we can see those with a Z or reversely or Z, you z TV vs. vs. versus it's sort of so versus versus versus.

And how many followers are they having this one. I'm crazy.

Well, you know, it's funny how things arise from necessity, from things like covid like we were talking about Andrew Schultz created that covid comedy, like he's doing these videos and it derived from not being able to create and do standup.

Well, he you know, he was he was already on the way to setting up that studio that he has. Yes. And then he it just fucking, you know, perfect timing, perfect timing. And the kid's incredible. I'm a fan of him. Before all of that, I was a fan. Yeah, he's a hustler. The universe is really fucking good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Not mad at that guy's success at all, but I feel that he should have way more success than he has.

He's got a lot of success and will have more. He will. But what is the future.

Yeah I think so, yeah. There's a, there's a good crop, there's a good crop up and coming guys.

Yeah. I just love the fact that people make lemonade, you know, they figure out a way like OK, what, what are we going to do here. I got some lemons I got this ain't good but let's, let's figure out how to make this. This is really sour what you do with this. Yeah. Yeah. And that's something that, you know, you don't always see from people. There's a lot of woe is me guys.

You know, when when the shit hits the fan, I, you know, I feel woe to myself sometimes.

But I'm also very aware that I am the reason I'm going. Even when I text you, I'm like, you know, you guys know that sucks. And I go, that's my fault. Yeah. Yeah. I'm all about accountability. You know you are.

Yeah. And your fault is your fault. You can't you can't pass the buck no matter what situation you're in your life. You fucking got yourself there.

Sometimes it's good to go through that shit, though, right? It's a personal growth moment. Absolutely. Opportunity for you to recalibrate. I think I used to be a pussy hound and yeah, I know you, but not anymore, that's for sure. I got fucking PTSD, dude. I'm not fucking tsd from pussy. Yeah. I'm literally like, you know what, I'm good. I got pornhub. I'm quite happy with that. My selection's.

I know how to love myself. Well. Getting heavy about. We got to do something, there was dead moments and it's my fault. What are you going to do hard, man, getting the good right? Yeah, shout out to my minder like Mike Binder. Such a good guy. I'm looking forward to that, doc.

When it comes out, it's going to be interesting, you know, because it details so many generations and so many different versions of the story, you know, from the very early days in the 70s to what was really the last, you know, the last few years was this incredible boom that was unprecedented.

By the way, I mentioned you in that one when I was doing the interview. I said he said, what do you think is the one of the reasons for the Renaissance here at the Comedy Store? And I said, I'll be honest, I think it's Joe Rogan. Joe Rogan came here, came back, and he brought a lot of people with them and he swears by this place. And I said, I really don't think it would be what it is without him.

That's very nice. Well, it's true. Why wouldn't just say it to say it, but I said it. I appreciate that.

It's a fact.

Well, it became a, you know, a better place, you know, when Adam was running it then and then, you know, like said, yeah, despite a lot of people don't like it.

Right. He's got me I've known him for, like, Adam on the podcast.

You know, he's used to be a cult. Did he really? Oh, you know. Oh, yeah. His parents and him. Right? Oh, yeah. Yeah. He grew up as fucking. Yeah, I grew up in a cult. Yeah. And didn't really realize it. No. I guess you wouldn't because you didn't know anything else. Right. Did you grow up.

What was it you remember. Branch Davidian thinking of Texas, yeah, something along those lines.

Waco is always going to be that place now, like even that, no matter what. Yeah, yeah. See do, see, do. Right. Yeah.

You know who grew up in an ashram was Abbey. You know, Abbey Road Irish. No. You know, he's at the store young kid. OK, nice kid. He grew up in an ashram. Wow.

What the fuck. That's heavy. So his parents were Buddhists. Yeah.

Like hippie types, you know. Oh wow. He's not even old enough to have hippie parents, so it's kind of weird. Wow. But he was telling me that because, yeah, I grew up in an ashram any age, you could be old enough to have hippie parents. Yes, especially in this day and age. There's a lot of kids up there right now that are growing up with hippie parents. There's a new renaissance for hippies. Yeah, yeah.

But there's so many of them online now. They find these little communities and they connect with each other. There's too much out there. There's too much too many weirdos can connect with other weirdos. Yeah. Is that bad though. It's good and bad. It's a double edged sword. I think it's good. It's good that they found somebody member like George Carlin used to say, I think we should you know, the homeless people you see on the street talking to you, talking to themselves, they should pair them up so that at least they look like they're talking to each other.

I think the possible good things outweigh the possible bad things. I think they get together and maybe they can improve each other. Maybe they can grow together. Being bi, if you're a hippie by yourself, you're fucked. If you're doing anything by yourself, it's not good. Yeah, well, that's one thing.

When I see, like, the homeless people under the bridge and I see them together, I'm like, well, I mean, it sucks. But at least you're not alone in this, you know. Right.

If you had a measurement of happiness scale, you know, I bet some of them are probably happier than people that work constantly. Yeah. You know, I mean, what what actually makes you happy? And it also depends on which makes you miserable. Yeah. Which part of this don't you like the fact, you know, being alone is a big one man being alone makes you very miserable.

Yeah. I mean, I'm quite happy being alone right now, but but that's a different situation. Different situation.

You're like you like being alone because it's better than wishing you were alone.

Yes. I'm not alone by force. I'm right by choice. Yeah, that's probably the worst.

Is wishing you were alone. Like being with someone who you wish you weren't with is worse than being alone.

Yes, because you feel alone. You know what's really fucked up? It's like it's very difficult to figure out. How do you get that if you're with someone you don't want to be with anymore? It's very difficult to figure out. How do you get back to where you were when you enjoyed them? Is that possible? Can you do that?

Some people need it needs to be both of you. Yes. That want to go back. Yes. And it's never there's you know, one of you is going to hang on to something. Yes. And you're both going to hang on to different parts of something. And that's what's going to stop them. The reversal of fortune.

That's why you got to do mushrooms together. All right. I do have yes. Give me some before I go, OK? And I'll take a little microdots. We'll see what's up at my leisure. I'm going to call you when we're about to do it, though.

Yeah, well, I'll walk you through it. Do it on a night that I'm not going anywhere. OK, I'll stay on the phone with you. I'll come to your house. It'll be a strange conversation about an hour in. You know, you should just come to my house and hang out in the backyard, OK? It's not far from you. I'll be your babysitter. That'd be great. OK. I couldn't ask for a better babysitter.

That's what you got to do. Sometimes they actually call it a sitter. Yeah. Yeah. When someone does psychedelics, the other person will be a sitter. Yeah.

Because I can't trust Eddie, my assistant. You're fucking not fully set to go. I did make a phone call. I'm like, well why am I in the fucking pool upside down then.

Who told you to pull the fucking voice in my head. Told me to go in the pool.

The voice you had and I can tell you go in the pool and tell you lie down the grass, just relax, stare up at the sky. It's going to be OK until it's not OK anymore and then it's not going to matter. And then what, then you go into the next stage of existence, how much to how long do the micro dosing last? Micro dosing is easy.

It's barely notice it's happening. The thing about true micro dosing is you're supposed to take it at really almost like sub perceptible levels. So you're taking it at a level where it's like you just barely get like a tiny rise from it.

And for many people, you know, Ron White is into that.

It's fucking runaway. Makes me laugh. Yeah, dude, he has no clue half the time. What's happening. He's the best ever. One night I dropped him home from the Comedy Store. He was we're there. Everybody is drinking. I don't know if, you know, he has drinks every now and then. And I was I was feeling good. He was feeling good. And he came outside, said he's like, I got to get home.

You could drive me. Can somebody call me and Uber? And I go, I'll get you home, Ron, because you're going to drive. You're drunk. I go, No, I'm not my buddy. I'll drive my car. All right, let's go. And I realize he gets in the fry. You get in the front run. I sat in the backseat of my car. My buddy drives. Where are you? At the Beverly Hills.

So he takes us gets us to his house and he's like, All right, thanks, Fildes. Hey, you want to come in and see what comedy can buy you? And I'm like in my head at that moment when he doesn't realize it's me and I go, Yeah, well, sure, I'll come in. So I go in his house because it was it's all comedy and I go nice. And in my head I'm thinking my house is bigger than this, but.

Right. And then he goes and his cover walks, he goes, Oh hey honey, this is I'm sorry, but I forgot your name. And she goes, Oh, my God, Russell Peters. And he goes, like this.

Fuck, he was that drunk. You forgot your name.

He forgot he didn't recognize me. But I don't know what it was as soon as you heard me because I fuck.

Oh my God. That's blitzed. That's hilarious. That's a high level of blitz. They call me. Just see you just made up all this, by the way, the worst Ron white person I think I've ever heard.

Possibly this is what comedy can buy. Yeah, it was. It's my it's my. He's a character from a movie. He is. He's really fucking funny guy to them. Oh, he's ridiculously funny flights with them. And he didn't I sat like in the he was on the other aisle across from me and I don't even say anything to me, you know, he looked right at me, didn't recognize me again.

I'm like last time he did this podcast we were talking and I go, How often are you fucked up? He's like, every fucking night I go, you get drunk every night, every fucking that. We have this conversation afterwards. I was like, You don't take any days off.

No, I don't think his liver would accept him taking a night off.

But you were just getting drunk every night and he doesn't look bad now for a guy. Great fucking hair. Good hair is amazing. Got great. I got fucking hair envy and he's a killer, like on stage. He's a fucking killer. Like, it doesn't affect his stand up. In fact, it probably enhances it. And the guy's been doing it forever. Yeah, I'm, what, 31 in your 31 in, aren't you? Yeah.

How do you tell a guy like that to change it up?

You can't because it's not a problem. He's a functioning alcohol. He's living in Austin now, is he really?

Yep. Wow.

So everybody knows where you're going, but nobody will hear this story about it. We're going to be fine. The you think you can stay here, though?

You're going to stay here. I have no choice but to move and I can't. Oh, it would cost me a fortune and I do not have right now podcast.

I need to get that. I should. Russell Peters podcast. Roland, what would you call it? I don't know.

What would you call it? The Russell Peters Show. Sure, why not? Doesn't need another name. Yeah. Everybody wants to come up with these fucking like Brian Cowan had mixed mental arts for a while.

Exactly. Exactly. I was Schobert torturing them. What are you doing?

Well, I was just with Brian at Frank Guerrilla's Birthday at Frank Guerrilla's Place, and it was like these guys eyelets done.

Yeah, I couldn't tell. Yeah, nobody can tell. No, he just he looked like he got the fuck beat out of him for about three days. Yeah. Now he looks normal.

Yeah. He had did have kind of like a purply thing under. I thought he was from sparring or something. No. And vanity and I think Gerard Butler was there that night. Oh Dry Butler is a really nice guy. He's a good guy.

I met him a few UFC. He's super nice guy. And at the end of the night I said to Brinegar, Well, you killed tonight man, because you won tonight. You won tonight's party, that's for sure. Oh, he's great at a party. Oh yeah. He's great.

He's he's he's one of the best guys for being funny in groups of people. Yeah. Because that's when he comes alive, like if he never did stand up again but he just went to dinner every night, he'd be fine. He could be a professional guest. Yes. Yes, yeah. A professional dinner guest. Yeah. Hey, listen, this dinner might be boring. How much is Callon charge for dinner? Dude, the first time I ever went hunting, I went hunting with callin me and him and Steve are now in the Meat Eater crew.

We went to Montana and it was seven days of hysterics. It was like one long shit dick or gay joke.

It was just him being let's just make out. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. That's the whole thing.

Like what would you do right now? But just start saving your cock. Just me sonically. He's just he's just such a, you know, like people thing about comedians. Oh they're on all the time.

That's so annoying. It's not annoying with Callon.

You know, he knows how to do it properly. Well it's a different kind of on. It's Brian Callanan like yeah, he'd be a great professional dinner guest. You know, people do cameo. Yeah. You know, they do.

Cameo Yeah. Yeah. Someone pays you to do like a little Letterman show I have when I have to do when I'm done, it's real quick.

But with Kalyn like Callan's you do that but with dinner guests, he should be a dinner guest. He should. Yeah he could be. I bet you he can make a fucking fortune. Oh for sure. How many rich guys would love to hang out with count. Yeah.

And even if they don't know them. Yeah. Once they get them they're like oh yeah. Because I saw Jared Berlinguer and we need to hang out and I'm like and I'm like, oh hang on to me. I didn't say shit all night but I shut up in a lot of those situations because I'm like I'm watching everything, you know, I'm always like what's going on in here? But when a lot of people are talking, there's nothing wrong with shutting up.

Yeah, it's fun. Hey, you don't learn when you talk, you learn your lesson.

So that's what I was trying to look at you, wise man. You should write that down somewhere and put it on Instagram to read it somewhere. Motivational quotes.

Yeah. Miss Jack Handy quotes. Those were my favorite. Jack Handy. Remember Jack Handy from SNL? Now, it would always be like like a Hallmark kind of quote. Like it takes a big man to cry, but it takes an even bigger man to laugh at that man who's crying and stuff like that.

Hmm. You pull those up there. Nothing has been better for those kind of things in the Internet. Oh, yeah. I mean, I'm saying now.

Yeah, you see people fucking right one right. One line like fuck that a great bit. Now I can't do this fucking idiot.

Well yeah. And it's also just that memes on the Internet is a different style of comedy. It's like a whole new kind of comedy that didn't exist before. Yeah. You know, if something goes wrong with a little Meems, those are my favorite. If I can write, I like really I screenshot them and then I send them to my brother. I did. I sent one today to him I think. There was one I saw, it said my wife's gone into labor, I called the hospital, my wife's gone into labor, what should I do?

Is this her first child? No, this is her husband. Wife. I love dumb shit like that. You're a throwback. I'm old school. That's a Jeff Ross type. I spoke to Jeff last night. How's he doing? He's doing good. Yeah, he's doing good. I love Jeff. He said he's in suspended animation, everybody. But the only thing that's been connecting me to everybody is doing this, like being able to sit down with guys, shoot the shit with them.

Other than last weekend with Tony and Moses, when we went to Houston, that felt like the old days again. It was crazy. You did the Houston Improv.

Yeah, I was there my first time ever there. Really? Yeah. Stage is really high. It's great. Yeah, it's a great club. I like it. I like it a lot. It was really fun. What was capacity. 50, 75. They were up to seventy five. Yeah. Yeah. Seventy five percent. I think that's what they were doing in my. It's pretty packed. Yeah. It looked awful. So Krisha's on the road.

Right. And he's doing drive in movie theater. Saw that. And he's got Jaysus with him. Yes.

And in between and he did the driving with Miss Pat as well. Volaris. Yeah. I love this Pat.

And right in between he did some clubs and he did a club in Oklahoma. It was supposed to be 120 seats socially dist. they stuff three hundred and forty three people in that area and they lied to him about the number. So Hatzius went around counting heads up and he counted three hundred and forty three people in there like that count is grossly inaccurate. Wow.

I have my assistant count the club too, just like Eddie. Go count every fucking C in degrees C click. I don't want to be fucking shortchanged by there because I'm already getting shortchanged. The money's bad now. The yeah, the money's last. They're charging less. But in their budget situation, Byrd was worried about catching covid. He's like, look, man, I did drive in movie theaters for a reason so that I would be away from everybody there in their car over here.

Everybody's safe. And he's like, Now I'm in this club because I don't feel safe at all because this is not good. They just stuffed it.

Dude, I'll show you a picture. You sent me a picture of it. I mean, it's fucking stuffed, man.

Like full, full on, stuffed like can Bert and Tom called me a couple of weeks ago. Hey, is is Hindu is Hindu your religion.

I go, no, no. Hindi the language you fucking idiot. Hindus the religion. Yeah. That's the one I like. That's the one I like. The one I like. What the fuck does that even call to ask me. What does that mean. That's the religion. I like the religion. That's what's your favorite part. What do you like about it. That's the one with Shiva. Yeah. Yeah. That's what I like to look at this like.

It's a fucking trilogy. Look how packed that place is. Oh Jesus. He sent me that. He goes, fuck.

He goes, I don't feel safe in my guts in Oklahoma. Yeah. You shouldn't feel safe like that. There's one guy with the mask, you one guy.

Meanwhile, fucking the cases in Oklahoma through the roof. Are they really. Yeah. Here, I'll put this up on. I'll give I'll send this to you Jamie so that you could put it on line. Shame these people really want to say who it is.

But you know, there's a lot of people it'll tell you, you know, they'll tell you that they've got X amount of people in the audience.

But then once you actually get there, man, I think once you get to middle America, they're not as ball busting the authorities. Well, the thing is, I don't think it's the authorities, man, I think it's the people in the club, they're fucking hurting, man, and they're willing to do anything.

I just to Jamie, the people that are I mean, imagine if you've gone, you know, 10 years in the business. There it is. Look at that.

There's the guy with the mask. Look how preposterous that guy looks like an employee, too. Yeah, that is fucking preposterous. The size of that crowd that they told him wasn't going to be 120 people socially distant. They're stuffed in their account.

It's grossly inaccurate.

I bet someone online can count three hundred and forty people from that photo.

That's a lot of fucking people really close to each other. People I see that the clubs I've been playing, I've noticed they've been paying attention, like in San Diego, the American Comedy Club. They had no front row at all. Yeah, they're doing it right and no front row at all. And then it was after that it was tables.

Yeah. San Diego is doing right now. See, that wouldn't bother me nearly as much. 347. That's the crest. That's a full club to full club. It's very much a folk. That's a that's a packed house. The San Diego Smart. That's a good see as long as there's enough space between you and them.

So if they're laughing, you're not getting it in your mouth, you know, and you're higher than them already. So that's what you need. And you also need a shield. I spit a lot when I'm on stage, and that's why I would say there's a reason you're back there and I'm here.

You know, it's we've got to get to a point where there's a test that you can take immediately. So they have the saliva test. There's a saliva test drive.

A test makes the most sense to me because that's where it's transmitted. Yeah, that's where the blood test seems a little.

I mean, I get what you're doing, but saliva seems like the most direct way of you would get it. Would you get your medical degree? I'm a doctor. I don't know if you know about this. I'm a doctor of the mix month.

Look, I think that they're going to be they're going to have those soon. And apparently they're really quick, like within a few seconds that you could lick something. Yeah. And I'll tell you, because you're more likely to get spit on you from somebody else than blood. But, bro, that would be amazing. Everybody wears a mask in line. You get to the door, you lift the thing. It says you're clean and everybody can come in and be a normal person.

Yeah. If we can get to that, we can open up everything. Restaurants, movie theaters, comedy clubs, beaches. Yeah, they should put all their effort on that.

And I know they're apparently real close to that. Someone was telling them Trump was telling someone that that it's got to be true.

Yeah, it's got to be he wouldn't lie after a couple of states today have issued statewide facial covering requirements in public spaces, including Texas and I think Ohio. Well, California said that for a while. Yeah, yeah.

I have my mask in the car. I wear it as needed. You know, I understand why I'm wearing it.

Dude, I was busting Bellbird balls about it like, you know, wear masks, as you know. I was just trying to rile them up and they sort of writing all these articles like I'm seriously like a mask denier or something.

And I here are so silly with what they do on Team Escapologist. It's just one of those things where people just looking for things to be upset about fucking I would love to hear Billy's version. Well, he's the best. It's he's somebody better. Well, he's also got muscles because he's ranting every week. He does his podcast solo, which is amazing. They can produce that much content. I mean, every fucking week he's doing to podcast the Monday morning podcast on Monday, and he does it on Thursday, too.

So he's doing two long rants every week and now he's doing one with Bert. Yes. The Bill and Bert show the bill. Bert, Bill, Bert. Yeah, that's a great name is Perfect Bill. Bert Parks. And they're so complete fucking polar opposites. Yes. That's what makes it great. Well, Bert's a Hosler man.

You got to give it up to Bert Krischer. I mean, he's the one who figured out how to do this drive in movie theater thing. He's got that tuba's one cavey does with time that's doing really well. He's got his own podcast. You know, he's he's fucking burts podcast.

Maybe six years ago he came to my house when I was in Malibu and we did it in my house, up in my bedroom, I believe. Oh, really? And we sat on the couch. I thought it was cool. Yeah. Mean, you should do your own. I understand. You do your own. Now's the time. I think on a worldwide scale, my mind would do pretty well.

You're just going to do pretty well here, too. But the thing is, like you've got to get going because it's it's you know, it takes a few months for them to really get cooking and really, you know, get a bunch of people into it.

But if you think about it now, we're we're here in June. It's almost July. I don't see us opening any comedy until September. October.

I just I'm scheduled to be in up live in Phoenix next weekend. Whoa.

But literally, day by day, I'm getting a text.

Closed, open, closed, open, closed. Open about them.

Yeah. Oh, so Arizona's wild. Arizona's wild. That is the Wild West sun. I mean, they're connected to Mexico. They they give zero fucks. They survived Indian attacks. They have an open carry state. Well, I've never. Attacked anybody that's difficult in India, where the real ones you are the real ones, is that offensive that other people call themselves Indians and never even been to India?

You mean the Native Americans? Yeah, the Native Americans do not accept the word India. They do. That's why you're wrong. I had a Native American lady on this podcast talking to me about Native American tribes, and they actually use the term Indian. They like Indian American Indian.

We don't like that because they were only called that because he was looking for Indian. Hai fucked up. Yeah. What a fuck up too. I know.

Jesus, he knew this was in India, you know. So he fucking knew, he was like oh that must be India. It was like they don't know, that must be Indian and those must be the Indians really. Yeah of course. Because if what was fucking lost that's why I was like what do you do on Columbus Day. She's getting your car and you turn the GPS off. Well then they land in the Bahamas. Possibly, I think they landed in the Bahamas.

Christopher Columbus. I think the first first people that were Amerigo Vespucci is how did he land here? That's where America comes from. The name Americas. America Vespucci. Oh, really? Yeah, that's right. I'm very ignorant to that, you know, things.

And that's why I like talking to you, because you do give me information of very little and I'm often wrong. That's fine. Don't get your information, but your confidence is worth it. And I'm with you and I'm confident I'm wrong a lot, trust me.

But yeah, I think they landed. I think they didn't even land in America proper. I think they landed in the Bahamas first, if I remember correctly, which is ridiculous.

And when six hundreds I don't know. I mean, 492 Columbus sailed the ocean blue. Right. That's what they want to happen. We didn't learn that in Canada says actually neither of them landed in America where they land. I'm trying to America. Yeah, Columbus.

Yeah, there we go.

See, I know some things. I occasionally know some things. But you know, what's crazy is that we still celebrate Columbus Day when we know he's a fucking serial killer.

I mean, the guy was a ruthless murderer, a horrific person. The shit that they did to the Native Americans that was documented by the missionaries that came along with them.

Yeah, but in Outer Mongolia, they have Ganga's Condee, which is really a nice day. That's when the fireworks are incredible.

The wrapping's, the murders, the skull lighting, people on fire, the skull trava skull pyramiding. Yeah.

Dude, if you ever listen to the wrath of the cons from Dan Carlin, from hardcore history, I didn't know much about Genghis Khan. I knew he was a conqueror and all that stuff.

And and I knew he was ruthless as fuck, ruthless as fuck.

But when you listen to the wrath of the cons from hardcore history, I think you can only get in on Dan Carlin's website. Now, he keeps a Dan Carlin has a system where he keeps a certain amount of them of it makes them available for free on his his iTunes page. But then once they get like to a certain number, then he archives them on his website and you have to pay. But it's only a dollar an episode and they're amazing.

He's got a podcast. But to call his podcast in my podcast, the same thing is ridiculous.

Like his podcast is really like an amazing, super entertaining audio history book, whereas this is just you and me talking shit.

Yeah, but yours I think you're underestimating how entertaining yours is because I could put it on with no matter who the fuck your guest is, no matter even if I'm like I don't know who that is, but I'll watch it and then I want you to go. I just learned so much. Well, that's good. It's good to know.

And it's you know, and sometimes I find even when you have the more the people that you think are going to get more from you, like I didn't I wasn't it sometimes.

Yeah. You never know. You never know who's going to be a good guest. It's good that you got Ellen to fucking talk. Yeah. Because I've met him. Yeah. Not a talker.

Well he likes me and he knows I like him and we can talk like he knows that I respect him very, I respect the shit out of and I'm very curious and so I can I know how to pull things out of them.

And after we did the first one like the first one was a little rough at first.

Man, if you go back and listen, the first one, the first like maybe, you know, fifteen, twenty minutes is kind of pulling teeth and doing heavy lifting. But then he got comfortable. He was super comfortable. When I first met him, when he came to the studio, he was real warm and friendly, gave me the flamethrower. It was good times. Yeah. But then once he settled in and then we started, we drank.

That was one of the reasons why we started drinking right away. I want to loosen them up. And then once he got loosened up, then we had a good time.

I met him from Jon Favreau, so I figured for having him are really good friends. I thought he'd be like, you know, Oh, you're friends with Farve. It was like, that's me, dude. He's almost too smart. It's like he's like talking to dogs. Yeah.

I mean, he's he's got a different level of way of looking at things and and making things happen. Yeah. You and I are a couple of collies. Yeah. We're fucking idiots.

I mean me for sure. For sure. Both of them. A Chihuahua. Yeah. I'm not even a fucking car. We're morons. And he's digging tunnels under L.A. and shooting rockets into space. Meanwhile, he's making electric cars and solar panels and Solar City. Yeah, like what the fuck man.

Yeah, he's he's the doctor Dre. Well, of of science.

He's the Nikola Tesla of twenty. Twenty is what he is. That's why he named it after. Yeah. It's, it's important to have guys like that around.

It's funny when people talk to our age that's the fucking crazy ass. Yeah. He's younger than us like forty six or something. I did a like a Canadian talk show and his mom was on with me. This was earlier this year I think. Did they have to plug her in. She robot. She's beautiful really. She's like seventy but she's really, she was a model and you could see you're like oh yeah she I feel awkward like hey she's looking hot.

Not too awkward because I was like I would take a run.

I had the chance to maybe get the rub a little smarter.

But yeah, I don't think I was actually fucking smart person. You get a little smarter. I'd be amazing. That would be amazing. Yeah. Because I think I've definitely gotten dumber as you got older know by fucking dumb women. Oh yeah. You get dumber. Yeah. Yeah.

You got dumbed down to make yourself get in there. Right. You go to their level. Right. And then when you go to a smarter woman's level you elevate yourself. But then because they're smarter, you can't get away with the same bullshit. There's nothing more embarrassing than if you think a girl is not so smart and then you find out she is smart and that's how, you know, she's smart. She played it like she's not smart. You know, Suzanne Somers was like that.

She's a very intelligent woman who understood I'm going to use this to my advantage. Hmm. That makes sense. As was Farrah Fawcett. Really. She's real smart. She was a very. How young woman who who knew that it was like, OK, I see, I see count on he did a movie with Megan Fox and he said he made that mistake. He's talking to her like she was a dummy. And then she turned on him, rattled off a bunch of facts and information.

He realized like, oh, yeah, there's a reason these people in the place they're in not always.

Well, a lot of times some of them are not true. Some very troubling their way. True.

That's true, too. I remember Whitney got mad at me one night at the Laugh Factory.

For what? I don't know, but, you know, I was issuing another comment like like PIC's, this is years ago, picks the girls that sent me. Right. Nudes and shit. And because I want to see and I go just naked women because let me see what the girl sent you. I show and she got fucking mad. She was like, you know, are you going to stop dating fucking stupid women? Russell, this is this is disgusting.

I didn't want to show you this. She was like, no, you need to do better. You're not an idiot. Why the fuck are you dating idiots? So I go, all right, I fucking felt bad after. But you know why she gets like that? Because she's really smart. I no, I know. So she's probably gets upset at dumb women. Like setting a bad example because I'm sure she gets treated like she's a dumb woman and she's not.

So she probably sees dumb women and sees that you give them attention.

She's like, she's like you're helping your, you're hurting us, hurting and cause. And I'm like, you know what? And I get it. And and, you know, the thing with female comics, they don't look at them as female comic book women's comics. Right. Because I'm like, if you're able to do the same job where there's no male or female, in my eyes we are doing the exact same job. The genders are relevant.

Well, comedy, stand up comedy is very much a meritocracy. Very much. Yes. The ones who are really good get a lot of respect. Right. No matter what they are gay.

Straight Male is one of my favorite comics of all time. She's a murderer. I just want to murder and murder.

And that's gender free. That's male. Female doesn't matter. She's a fucking beast.

Yeah. Yeah, she's a killer. Same with fighters. Female fighters. I don't look at them as female fighters. Look them as fighters. Well, yeah, because they have the balls to do something I'm not going to be able to do. Get in there and put it on the line. Do you think you do a jujitsu match? I, I was supposed to do the world's this year cut the fuck out. I was going to do the Masters really in August.

Wow. I was so excited for it because I had dropped weight and I was going to go down to 205 because I think the weight limits to 12 with the guy on me and I'm already at 210. I'm like fucking five more pounds. Not a big deal.

Wow. So Blue Belt Masters, Blue Belt Masters under 50 because I'll be 50 in September. I was so excited about it then this fucking I was like, so pissed, it's not even July. I know. Come on, baby, it's not going to happen this year. It's not going to happen. No, they're not happening. It's not happening. But there are parts of this year.

Is that real? Yeah. Cheesus, the Olympics for this year, right? Yeah. They're not happening. The Olympics aren't happening. The Olympics aren't happening in the fucking world. Massachusetts is.

No. Well, there have been some grappling competitions, submission to CBIS and all that kind of stuff. But well, Charlestonians event submission on the ground. Is that gear? Nogi Nogi, I don't listen. I like Nogi, but I'm not ready for Nogi. Yeah. How come I don't train enough Nogi.

I'll train Nogi every now and then, you know, and I enjoy it, but it's a much faster game and it's, it's definitely different with grip's and stuff grips with different everything.

Grabbing that I don't like, you know, I'm not grabbing because I get pimples on something like that. I'm always get your fucking hand away from me like it's like boxing for me. When I see the hand, I push it out of the way so I can get their neck, you know, well done.

Jack always says, don't ever trust your neck. That's what he always tells me. You don't ever trust your neck. Yeah. Unless you have my neck. And then the guy that gave you the iron neck. Yes. Yeah, they gave us he came to the gym shortly after I did the podcast last time, and he was dropping off one of John. Jack. Oh, beautiful. There's a guy I just heard you on John Road going to go.

So can I get one of these fucking things or. Yeah, you know, I never got it, but I definitely need.

I'll give you one, please.

Yeah, I have one here of four of them. I have one here and I have three at my house because he keeps sending me the newest versions of it. But I still use the old version. Yeah, I just need one. I haven't even set up the look.

The old version is amazing. I'm sure the new versions better, but I haven't even bothered taking them.

I would like to just tighten this shit up here. We'll lose some weight. It'll tighten that shit up.

But no, it's already listen, I used to look like a fucking like a nice sandwich. Look like an Arby's sandwich here before. Have you used it in the neck? No, I never used it, no. But I could definitely enjoy it. I'm pretty sure I would love to use it. We'll go do it right now. Right. We're done here. I'll take you show you. It's really easy to use. Real simple. It's the best exercise ever for strength in the safest for strengthening your neck.

Yeah, we used to in boxing. We used to have to lay at the end of the ring. Mm hmm. You break it off, OK.

And then lift weights with the weights. Just that shit. Yeah.

It wasn't even like a thing that was secure. It was like a fucking leather strap belt with some weights hanging off your forehead. You have to be careful. Didn't slip off.

I have one of those too. But I don't like it in this. No, I don't like it either. I don't think it's natural to put extra weight on your head and then bend it and put all that pressure on your disks of your neck. Yeah, the beautiful thing about the iron neck is it strengthens your neck without having to bend it in any weird way. You keep your neck totally straight so your posture is straight like this. You have the halo that goes on the head and then the fifty pound bungee cord.

So as you back up, you're never doing weird shit like this, which puts that additional pressure on you disks. Right? It's easy, buddy. I'm looking forward to this.

All right. We'll do it again. Let's wrap this up and I want to talk about I'm good. Whatever you let everybody know, the Russell Peter Show will be premiering me.

Let me read you what I want to tell you. You write some sit down for some shit down.

Did you sometimes watch, by the way. Thank you. That you want it very sporty. No, I'm gonna give you a watch once before you did give me a Breitling.

And I wear it every day. Every time I do a special. Yeah, it's my good luck. Watch.

I appreciate if you look at triggered and strange times more in your watch.

Oh that's awesome. You know what, whenever I'm watching UFC, I go, what's he wearing. I sure I was wearing like this stainless really focused on my watch.

How are you. Watch all the time. I know I'm happy. It makes me happy. I still have the watch you gave me for that. I had a watch on you had to watch the leather strap. You said it smelled. It fucking stinks. Holy shit. It fucking stunk. It's old ass watch.

But when you gave me that watch, like legitimately I think I think my Comedy Central special from 2014 has that watch on to that's my good luck watch.

Oh that's awesome. I wear it makes me really happy. Makes me happy too. But uh let's see what do I want. Different psychedelics. I said, I said to my guy, I said, hey Todd, I'm doing Rogan today. I want to talk about our company. And he goes, well, company, the one I'm working with. One of them of, oh, the Red Light Holland. And I'm like, oh, great.

And then I go, send me some talking points this fucking guy sends me. I'm like, these aren't points. This is a paragraph. I don't know. I need something I can look at and get the information real quick.

That's more than a paragraph that's many buried. Oh it keeps going. Yeah, that's a lecture. He sent you a TED talk fucking Todd Shapiro.

Oh. Anyway, read like truffles, dotcom.

That's what I can't imagine how the truffles are legal and then the the caps are not.

I think maybe it's because on the route. Yeah. But it's still it's still psilocybin. Right. But for some reason it's the loophole. We're taking advantage of the loop. OK, I'm going and we're doing it in a way that it doesn't fuck you up. How's that?

We're taking the right amounts for the minimal amount for the micro dosing. It's micro dosing only at this point. Well, a lot of people in San Francisco before San Francisco imploded, they were all doing the micro dosing in tech communities. They were doing it. It was really big and it'd be great.

Yeah, because you open up your mind, you get some ideas. Yeah. What is the easy way to do that? Because he's got some fucking wild out there ideas, bro.

Ilan's on another level, he's an he's the next stage of evolution. That's what I think. I think we're all like chimp people and he's like this new thing. Yeah. And then. And then he named his kid then. Yeah exactly. I saw Meme and said Elon Musk kid will not have birthdays. It'll have updates.

Yeah. He's too fucking smart. I don't want to be that smart. That's one of the things that I asked him too is like what does it look like. You wouldn't want to be me.

She literally said that I can't imagine getting sleep. Yeah. I mean, I think ideas are just bouncing off his head like a fucking Super Bowl, the inside of his head, just being me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me.

It's like Pong. Yeah, but when you get, when you get it stuck between. Yeah.

There have been dumb like us. Right.

I mean you're to me. You are. Yeah. I don't know if you know this but to me and a lot of people I would say almost all of your listeners, you were the guy that a lot of people go to to find out information. Yeah. Because I have a good memory. But that's it. If have a good memory and you're nonbiased, I try, try very hard.

Yeah.

But that's one thing that I've learned from doing this podcast. I've learned how to look at information for what it really is, and I'm learning the zero benefit in not admitting you're wrong and zero benefit in in pretending you have information that you don't have. Like if I don't know something I ask, you know, it's very important.

Yeah. You got to you're very good at retaining things. Some things lost.

My wife lost shit. I don't I mean, you can't I mean, you didn't remember to download Scottie Fox's mix that I sent you.

But I mean, when you told me I was probably high when we were at dinner, it was you, me and the the black guy who makes me feel bad about sleeping in. Oh, Goggins.

That's hilarious. So is it campaigns and GOGGINS. Yeah, that's right. We're in Vegas. Yeah, that's right. It was the four of us. That's right. That's right. And I looked at Chuck Zito, had that crazy jacket with the tassels, the crazy Native American jacket. So he comes up, comes over to hug everybody has his tassels, are getting everybody's drinks, got gravy on him and stuff. Tuxedos. Such a character. I love Chuck.

He's a great guy. It is a hard exterior, the sweetest guy in the world, a sweet guy. I could count on him at any time of the day. Yeah, he's quite a character to sixty seven years old. That's amazing. He looks great, looks great. And he's had a health scare while back. Right. You four, five years ago prostate cancer got it removed. Bounce back, bounce back. Beautiful little old school.

You know the old school guys are like, you know, it's about honor and their word and I appreciate that. I think I'm a little old school in that regard. Yeah, I think you are, too. I would say that, yeah. Yeah. Although my word that fucking Phuket Russell Peters show coming soon.

When could be a plan on it. September. You tell me I'm going to September. September this time we'll work it out through this month in August. Who's going to start doing some dry runs. I'll be guess number one. How about that.

Be fucking him. Yes. We'll get you high on mushrooms. We'll figure it out. You we'll get high on mushrooms and do the first time. That sounds good. Russell Peters, ladies and gentlemen, good bye. America and the rest of the world. Thank you, friends, for tuning in to the show. And thank you to our sponsors. Thank you to Bamby. Go to Bamby Dotcom Slash Rogen right now to schedule your free H.R. audit.

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