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[00:00:10]

Hey, up, I spent about 14 hours shooting a few scenes for Space Jam two. I know it's cool. Let me back up.

[00:00:25]

I shot a scene for space jump to like a year ago, and then covid happened and some stuff changed up at the studio or went out slow. But they had to they needed to reshoot and reconfigure.

[00:00:40]

They had rewritten some things.

[00:00:43]

And this time around I wasn't trying to be a dick. I just said, you know, I'd do it without me, just hire somebody else. I even made a list of people that would be great.

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I just didn't want to. It's not that I don't want to be in space jam too. I really did. But with everything I've been kind of feeling lately as this middle aged, very juy performer. I no longer was particularly psyched to play a scumbag executive as a Jew, because the parts available to me are so limited. To that. I just go, it's there's nothing wrong with that. It's written, it's not offensive for me. I just I just don't want to play a scumbag executive as a Jewish seeming person.

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I don't want to put that energy out there and I don't want to do it.

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So I passed and then they took that as like, OK, we'll give you more money and I felt really Jewish going, well, maybe I will then, but no, I still didn't want to do it.

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And the director said, well, can I just get on the phone with her, so I go, Yeah, you know, and I get on the phone with him and that's always a mistake because I'm such a sucker, you know? And then I ended up loving em, you know, like it was a new director. I liked the last one, too. But we were on the phone and I said to him, I said, there is nothing wrong with this role.

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It's an important role in that it gets information out that you need. It has a you know, it's it's you know, there's a. Plot in it, you know, and it it's services, it's not you don't have to service this character. The character is there to service the the plot. And I get that. And there's nothing wrong with it. There's nothing problematic with it. I said I just for me, I'm so Jewy.

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I don't want to play a scumbag executive because I just see it too much and I don't want to be a part of it. But, you know, and then I go now I feel like an asshole. But I'm going to pitch Ben Schwartz because I think he would be so funny and he's so brilliant. He improvises. So maybe I'm being a hypocrite. I just didn't want to be a part of it. No offense, please. But he talked me into it because he just I don't know, we just kind of immediately became friends on the phone and I and he's like, we'll have fun and I'll let you be funny, I promise.

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And. And then I was like and then he did tell me, like they wanted to keep some of the stuff we already shot and if I don't come back, they won't be able to use any of that. And then I felt like a dick. And so I go, OK, I'll do it. So I went in. First of all, you know, it's like the covid protocol is insane, it's like test after test after, then you get there and it's a rapid testimony, fill out all these forms and you have to, you know, swear on a stack of Bibles.

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And, you know, it's like a whole process and which I'm grateful for. And everyone's got masks on.

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And even the actors, you have to have masks on all the way up until just like right before you shoot. And they do touch ups and you shoot.

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I got there and I don't know what it is about the warehouse we were shooting or whatever. Also, I just think that, like the weather's turned out here in L.A. and it's windier and I just didn't prepare for it, I got the worst allergies I've ever had. Like, my nose is still is kind of clogged. My nose is just clogged, but also just raining, just raining. Pure water, like no viscosity, even just raining. And then my eyes were just watering and red and I just felt so bad for everyone around me.

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And I was sneezing, you know, and it's just like I felt I was just so apologetic the whole day. So that was a bummer. Like I was just like, I am so sorry. I swear to God that I don't believe in, but that I do not I am not sick at all. I have allergies. I don't know what it is. And I also just felt like, you know, when you just you know, you're telling the truth, but you feel like you're lying, because when people tell me I'm not sick, I have allergies, I never believe them ever.

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I'm like, fuck you, you have a cold. But you didn't want to miss out on this, you know, whatever.

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But they were really everyone was really nice. I miss this scene with LeBron James. And, you know, he's like he's shooting all day, every day insane hours than getting up at like 5:00 in the morning for, like, kids basketball starting. I don't know how he does it. And he had, like, such a great attitude the whole time. And but anyway, they were all very gracious about it. And apparently a couple other actors had really intense allergies there.

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You know, what happens is no one shooting anything. And then this isn't even a studio. It's a giant warehouse that they built the studio and the sets in. So it must have just been just covered in dust. And then all of a sudden all these workers and all these sets are brought in and the dust is just going everywhere.

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I mean, that place needed like sixty room bus and like fifty air purifiers. But, you know, I don't either already demanded so much, but I got through the day and the truth is it was really fun. I had a good time. My dad had heart surgery.

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And it was like nothing. I mean, he's 83, so I don't know where they go in, but they just they put two clips on his heart and then he was home that night.

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Crazy.

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And so then I was face time him that night, you know, I was just so, like, happy that he was home and it went well.

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And, uh. But he was funny, I said, how did it go because. You know, before when I got there in the morning, these two nurses came in and they were telling me step by step, everything that was going to happen in the procedure, I go, I'm going to be sleeping, tell the doctor.

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And sure, the doctor knows. And then he was very proud of himself because the anesthesiologist came in. And my dad sees them and he goes, no, you are not putting me to sleep, you are not putting me to sleep.

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Anesthesiologist was like, all right, well, I am.

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He goes, no, I've I've been put to sleep every time when any anesthesiologist comes. Not this time.

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Not, not. Always get not right. The guy goes, could you count back from one hundred for me goes, No, I'm not going to count back from one hundred because that's how you and I he said, that's the last thing he remembers.

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He's such a goddamn pain in the ass, but he's so funny, someone asked if I had pooped at Rory's and well, I answered that question and then somebody I looked at I was looking at some of the comments.

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And one of the comments was this from Kelly, Gene Lewis.

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So when my ex and I first started dating, he always needed to run across the market to get butter.

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I was like, why does this guy need so much butter?

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One time his son said, you know, my dad poops at Target when you're here and he just says he needs butter. So the next time I went over there, I brought butter with me.

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And when he made the butter excuse, I pulled it out and told him he didn't have to go.

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I had brought butter. He was breaking a sweat. After I let him squirm for a bit, I let him off the hook and told him I knew about his butter runs.

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His buttar runs, we had the poop conversation and it was fun after that, I thought that was funny, funny enough to take out my glasses and read it to you. It was funny.

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I posted it and then Rory retweeted it and wrote, Wait, what? Because, you know, the clip said how I you know, I didn't want to drink coffee at his house, and then when he realized why, he was like, well, I couldn't make you coffee, and then I'll maybe I'll walk the dog.

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So when he retweeted it and wrote, wait, what? You know, there is someone who commented underneath it and he just wrote broke up. She dropped a deuce while you were on the walk.

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[00:12:07]

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Oh let's take a voice mail call. Let's listen to a voicemail hey. Wow, this is actually fucking happening. First and foremost, sir, you are my favorite comedian.

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I grew up with you. Thank you. How are you? But OK, my thing is I don't relate to introverts. And I feel like nowadays even pre covid think like being introverted was starting to become like accepted the cool thing and like, sure, but I'm an extrovert and I've been fucking stumbling. Being at home depresses me, not being around people depresses me, and since I deal with addiction, it got pretty bad in the beginning. I went to treatment and I'm 70 days clean today, but eventually I just.

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I know I'm directing my agitation towards introverts, but more so like I just need to be around fucking people. Jesus, I miss being around people and I don't thrive at home. I thrive.

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You know, around people and stuff anyway, do you really? I surprisingly, I don't necessarily relate, I empathize, I you know, this is interesting, so he's 70 days. Clean and sober, and I can't imagine how hard that must be during a pandemic. And and good job and congratulations on today. And. But, you know, I don't know if I think this might be misplaced.

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Anger or blame, you're reacting to being uncomfortable and I think the way you think about what an extrovert is, someone who wants to be out and with people, that's lovely.

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But it seems like there's something a common thread with. Being able to avoid self, you know, whether it's drugs or being out and doing stuff with people.

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You're avoiding being with yourself, so, you know, I've come to a place I'm probably older than you and I actually really enjoy being alone.

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I'm in I'm in a relationship now, and I I'm very protective of being alone for a certain amount of time every day.

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I need it.

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I enjoy being alone, and it's definitely was something I had to learn. You know, I grew up and I think part of it is being young, you know, I'd be out until 6:00 in the morning. I could have strep throat, I'd be out until 6:00 in the morning.

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But, you know, at a certain point, I really just craved being alone at the end of the night, you know, and it is something you have to learn to be your own best friend. You know, my mom would always say be your own best friend.

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And I didn't get it, you know, at four for a long time, obviously. But I really work on it, you know, because we're so hard on ourselves. And it's not modesty. It's it's self obsession.

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You know, all my thighs. Oh, my.

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This summer of, you know, go to a children's hospital, get a little perspective like you're fine. Um.

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Yeah, so I think, you know, I think working on being comfortable with being alone and being your own best friend, and I'll tell you, I started just talking out loud to myself, maybe under the disguise of of talking to my dog.

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But I'm really comfortable talking to myself out loud, maybe too comfortable, and I try to correct myself when I'm.

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A critical, you know, like I I always try to account for a certain amount of cognitive distortion when I look in the mirror and, you know, I always try to when I pass by mirrors, I make myself look at it and give myself a thumbs up, which makes me laugh and is like a good energy.

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You know, even if I'm in a bad mood, it's even if it doesn't necessarily work, whatever that, you know, I'm trying to do there, it's it makes me laugh.

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And then, you know, I get outside of myself.

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But self is like a real hard thing to, like, wrestle with and be OK with.

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I think there are people that so much don't want to recognize themselves in the mirror.

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They they change their face, you know.

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They change their whole the way they look, they don't want to recognize themselves in the mirror, you know, addiction is a way to get away from yourself. There are so many ways.

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But I guess there's that book. That's probably what that's about. Like wherever you go. There you go. Isn't there a book like that?

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But it's a practice to to be able to like yourself and to really be your own best friend.

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But you can do it. And when you do, it's an incredible freedom.

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But in terms of the pandemic and connection, that makes a lot of sense. And I'll say the first thing I thought when this started and we didn't know what was going to happen. I was like, I I'm so grateful. That this is if this has to happen, that it's happening at a time where we have face time and the Internet and can connect digitally because. It became very clear that we weren't going to have any kind of physical contact or in-person contact for a while and much longer than I even knew, but so, you know, there are ways to connect.

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And, you know, you can have a zoom with your friends. You can do stuff. We're going to have to stay in your apartment. Or wherever you live. And that's that, you know, this is about your relationship with yourself, I have friends that. You know, still, you know, that comedians, that they will just stay out all night until 4:00 in the morning and go home just to sleep and then wake up and and be with people all day.

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And I I really see it.

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I worry about them. I see it as I don't see it as extroverted per say.

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I see it as a means to escape one's self for your entire waking life.

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I don't know that. But that's my opinion. I could be wrong. It's scary to be alone with your own thoughts. Hey, Sarah, first of all, I just wanted to say I love you. My name is Heather and I just wanted to ask you a question. OK, how often have you had to deal with insecure men who felt threatened by you? Because you're so smart, funny and pretty, and how do you deal with them?

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Well, first, I stay with them for several more years and then I learn to minimize myself as much as possible or, um.

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I can learn to not do that behavior anymore, which is what I'm trying to do and what I feel like. It's working out well with my current lover, Rory. Which is seeing someone who is fine with it and not just fine with it, proud of me, tickled by it, thinks it's neat. Does not measure his worth against. My job, you know, or. You know, is my biggest cheerleader, and I he and I, he what am I, Shakespear here?

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Because it's interesting, I'm attracted to masculine men, but what is that masculinity? I think that sometimes. Insecurity can be misconstrued as masculinity.

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Rage, a temper that comes out of nowhere that I can't ever be prepared for, so I'm always perfectly prepared for it, those things are not masculinity, it's insecurity.

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It's a lack of self-examination, maybe, but those aren't I mistakes those things.

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I was mistaken. I just took those things for for being drawn to a masculine. I'll tell you what masculinity is right now to me that I'm attracted to. Rory. Just built a table saw. That's hot. That is so fucking hot. You know, it came in a million pieces. He read the whole manual, digested it. Learned how to build it. And then fucking built it, then decided it should be on wheels and wheels for it and put them on.

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I find that to be very masculine and I'm drawn to it, I'm attracted to it doesn't mean that woman couldn't do that. Of course not. Not what I'm saying, doll. But that is a god damn man, it's I find it hot. You know, that's like my stepdad. It was like that John O'Hara, the greatest, greatest man, a Marine. And then he got out of the Marines and became a logic and philosophy professor, a quiet man.

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But said what was on his mind, if need be, but besides that, sat in his chair next to the wood stove and read books. And loved us built by the bed I slept in my whole childhood built stuff with his hands in the garage, big brain. Also made stuff with his hands. It's cool and I love them for it, and I always think of them at 11, 11, I think of all the people I've lost and I remember little snippets of things so I can really, really remember them, their voice and everything.

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And the thing I remember, John, is always, you know, he side hug me because, you know, he was like that kind of generation. Give me a side hug. I mean, look down. And he'd say to me, I don't care what they say. I like you.

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And I always thought that was so funny.

[00:24:36]

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Sarah, a checkout. Hi, Sarah. Chris here, I've been a fan of yours since I was 13 years old and it was 2007 and the Sarah Silverman program was on Comedy Central and I stumbled across it. And I can remember physically quivering with laughter.

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And I've loved you ever since as well as you.

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I also love pop stars. And this year has been pretty much a shambles in every single way. Apart from the releases by our favorite pop stars, we've had music and projects from Lady Gaga, Beyonce, Ariana Grande to Katy Perry, Little Max, Kylie Minogue.

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It's been a bit of a treat of a year in that one aspect. I just wondered if you have any opinions on pop stars and who's your fave? Who's your least favorite? Who do you like? Have you met any of them? Yeah. Love you. Bye.

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I'm not a huge pop fan. I mean, I like pop music, you know, but it's not like, you know, I think that I will say I think that Miley Cyrus and Taylor Swift are artists. I mean, I find with each thing that they do very interesting, and it's it's their trajectories have been really neat and I just think they're real art.

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You know, there's OK, hold on. Let me find this. There's a song. You know that song, Blank Space by Taylor Swift, you know, it's like a really good song, but and it shouldn't have shouldn't have taken a man to point out her songwriting prowess. But she has this song called Blank Space. And it's on an earlier album.

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And it's good, you know, it's really good, but then I'll play a little of both, then this incredible artist who I love, Father John Misty, recorded a cover of Blank Space as Lou Reed.

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And as the story goes that I've heard it, he recorded it and he put it out.

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And then I think he had a dream that Lou Reed came to him and said, not cool, dude. And so the next day he took it offline. But it's still on YouTube. And I hope this doesn't come off as disrespectful, full to disrespectful to Father John Misty, because I love his music, but.

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He's wrong, it's great. All right, so and it just really showed me what a brilliant songwriter she is because it absolutely sounds like a Lou Reed song who I'm a super fan of. All right. Here's a little blank. Hold on a second. Hold on a second.

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I'll just give you a little taste. Of blank space. Nice to meet you. Where you and I could show you incredible things. Madness heaven sent for you there. Oh, my God, look at that face. You look like my next mistake. Money, suit and tie. You like a magazine is funny, I know you heard about all right, so that's a little sample of the actual song.

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Here is a little sample. Of the father John Misty version. Nice to meet you where you've been, I could show you incredible things, magic, madness, heaven. So then I thought, oh my God, look at that face. You could be my next mistake.

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Love's a game, wanna play. New money, suit and tie. I can read you like a magazine and it's funny how rumors fly and I know you heard about me. So let's be friends. I'm dying to see how this one ends. Grab your passport and my hand. I can make the bad guys good for a week and it's going to be forever or go down in flames. You tell me when it's over. If the high was worth the pain, got a long list of ex lovers.

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They'll tell you I'm insane because you know, I love the play area. Sorry, I played too much of that, but it's it's so good.

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I listen to that.

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I go, oh my God.

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She is a great songwriter. She really is. It's just interesting to see how she grows and changes. But in general, I'm not super into pop.

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If that answers your question.

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It's ah, this is Alfredo from your question. I mean, I think I am pretty I am pretty sure that you dislike it. Donald Trump, as many Americans did or or to. So I was wondering, isn't there anything positive for that he has done during his time in the White House? I mean, the guy is so there is so much hate for the guy, but it can be that bad. Right? Let's do do say.

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Yeah.

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Well, Paru, I love when we get voicemail's from other countries. Yeah, I know. I don't care for him at all.

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I he's a putrid gas. Pig, right? But I do think some good things, you know, things happen during administrations that can be good or bad and have maybe little to do with the president himself or her, you know, but.

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I would say there was some like prison reform, a little like motion towards prison reform that I hope keeps going, I think because Kim Kardashian went and he's so fucking dazzled by celebrity.

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I mean, that's the great irony of him, is there's no one he wants to be in with more than fucking dumb celebrities.

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I'll tell you what else I think was good that came out of the past four years, not because of it, but just happened during it. Space Force.

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I'm sorry, I'm into space force.

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I know when it came out, you're like, oh, God, now he has space for us because you're just seeing everything through the lens of this fucking asshole.

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But it's it's cool, like in Space Force, my eye may be icy because my niece is in space for she's in the Air Force and she's got assigned to Space Force.

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And it's cool, you know, you hear space forseen, just go fucking Trump, you know, whatever.

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But everything sounds crazy when it first happens. Yeah. Space for sounds crazy. So I'm sure the I'm sure Air Force sounded crazy when it first came out.

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It's going to be the army but in the air. You know, everything that's new hits your ear funny. When friends came out, I remember going, oh, are you going to watch friends? It's about friends. Even like Happy Days, I'm sure when Happy Days came out, people were like, oh, it's happy. Are you going to watch Happy Days? Maybe not. Probably came from like Happy Days are here again. Yeah, I don't know, that wasn't the best example.

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But I mean, even like when blogs were first thing, there were comics would be like, oh, who are you going to talk about it in your blog?

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Everyone would laugh because it was like a new word that was lame. Oh my God. Blogs, blogs. Now we get our news from blogs a lot, you know, blog that was like the Zagnut in stand up comedy of the 2000s.

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Yeah, I saw liberals shitting on a space for, you know, because Pence said that they're going to be called guardians, you know, like Marines are called Marines in space force. They're going to be called guardians.

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I like that. I get the impulse to hate it because it's coming from Panzner, it's coming from Trump, but. If it wasn't, we'd be into it. That's not. That's not really how we want to do things right? Yeah, I like the idea of they're called guardians. I'd like to when we when we with the police, when we build back better the police system, I think it'd be cool if they're called Guardians.

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Community Guardians.

[00:37:32]

Well, there you go. What else we got? Hi, Sarah, I'm calling you from Sweden. First, I just want to say I love you and you're so fucking funny and always loved your comedy. And but the thing is, here in Sweden, we have democratic socialism as our main ideology in politics, and we have had that for quite a while. And and I know that you say that your socialist Democrat or Democratic socialists want to call it then, but at the same time they're also like making ads for.

[00:38:17]

Yeah, a lot of stuff in your podcast, which to me is sort of a capitalist phenomenon, which is. Kind of the opposite of socialism, actually. And I just want to hear your thoughts about that, because maybe I'm wrong, maybe you have a way to unify those. But I just to me, it's weird. Anyway, either way, I fucking love your show, keep doing it. Bye bye. Uh. That's a good.

[00:38:56]

Questions, comment. Hmm, Sweden. I mean, yeah, I do do ads do do. But only for companies I'm passionate about, I don't do all of them, Sweden isn't isn't Valvo from Sweden and Saab like Salame, why don't you just send me a free car? I mean, there is. There is capitalism in Sweden. Am I wrong, I mean, you know, like there you sell things, you make things and you sell things.

[00:39:32]

I don't think it's all like only from a federal level, but.

[00:39:39]

Yeah, I think our definitions maybe are different. Maybe he's right and I'm wrong, maybe they're different, I mean, certainly like Sweden, their country is democratic socialist, so that's their ideology as a whole. Our country is capitalist. Our country is has is wealth addiction. It's worshiping the wealthy no matter how that money was accrued.

[00:40:07]

Did I use that word right? How do you even spell it? AC are you, Ed? What does it mean? I don't know. I must have taken the limitless pill and somewhere in my brain I learned that word, yeah, we worship money here over everything else.

[00:40:31]

But as for me, as a democratic socialist, what it means to me is that.

[00:40:39]

Ideally, there is a baseline thrive, a bowl of living, you know, provided federally that, you know, everyone is guaranteed.

[00:40:56]

Medical care, health care, medicine, access to all those things, access to quality education at a baseline level.

[00:41:08]

And everything beyond that. It is up to you, you know, I get this American ingenuity would still exist without children being hungry in our country.

[00:41:24]

So that's that's how I look at it. I mean, certainly we could live in a country where everyone has health care and education. And. Also can chill hello, Toshiba days, Bernie Sanders wrote a book, he didn't write it for free. You can still have those ideals and want people at a baseline level to be OK. To look after each other as a country. You know, the soul of this country is totally rotten. But. In terms of its its wealth worship, but I see that as different than American ingenuity and.

[00:42:18]

You know, living the dream of selling Toshiba days. I also think no one needs to be a billionaire. I think there could be a cap on that. You know, after you make a billion dollars, maybe it all goes into into the well. Is that does that feel like stealing from you, that if you have so much money that everyone in your entire family for the rest of their lives can live luxuriously? Maybe Chipin beyond that.

[00:42:46]

Bezos is ex wife, has given billions, quietly given away billions.

[00:42:56]

And it's so read more than him, way more than him. She's put Silicon Valley to shame. And it's pretty cool, you know, listen, I totally depend on Amazon and Whole Foods and all that. Qaid. But he has to be made to pay taxes. You can't just count on. Corporate responsibility has to be federally mandated.

[00:43:29]

These are things that would be more in line with maybe democratic socialism, I thought it's what just a democratic country would be.

[00:43:39]

You know. I could go on and on, I'm going to stop myself, but, yeah, I think we could be a little more like Sweden. Why wouldn't we take what works in other countries?

[00:43:49]

It's so odd to me. But, yeah, send me a sub. Send me a free Volvo, Volvo, Volvo, Volver, Volver, send me a free Volvo and Saab about it. You're so hippy dippy.

[00:44:06]

We live of love here in Sweden. Mail me a car then.

[00:44:13]

I'm probably not making a point. All right. What else we got? Hi, Sarah, my name is Zoe. I just wanted to talk to you a little bit about frogs. I love frogs.

[00:44:26]

I'm in Connecticut and we just got a lot of snow. And I wanted to tell you that you probably know this already, but some frogs can freeze. Solid through the winter, and they'll thaw out in the spring and they'll be fine. You about, but I just thought you might. Be interested and, you know, I'm sure you already knew this about frogs, but just a reminder, they're called Frog Sickels and they'll freeze and then they'll come back.

[00:45:07]

OK, goodbye. I did not know that, and I frogs were a big part of my childhood, I love frogs. I lived on a. On farmland, where I would always catch frogs, play with frogs, we had frogs, we had frogs in the water, we had toads, we had tree tree toads and treatments are this big.

[00:45:38]

They're so cute. They're just little and frogs. And I would go go by the creek and there'd be tadpoles everywhere.

[00:45:48]

And then, you know, of course they'd become frogs. And it never occurred to me what happened to them in the winter. And they freeze solid and then come back to life months later. That's I mean, I bet people who are into what's the thing when you freeze your body, cryogenic cryogenic cryogenics? They must study frogs if they don't, you should do that study of frogs do it. Yeah, there's got to be something that Jeezy's out into their like organs.

[00:46:29]

To protect them. I mean, that's the dream, right? Or if your brain is functioning, then that would be awful because you'd just be like, oh, all you.

[00:46:43]

But not oil can be like she heat.

[00:46:52]

You know, we've come to the end of another show and I just have to say from the bottom of my heart, subscribe, rate and review wherever you listen to podcasts and check us out on YouTube.

[00:47:07]

Never have I meant anything more. Or said something from the depths of my soul. Then subscribe, rate and review. Wherever you listen to podcasts and check us out on YouTube, if you like to watch with your eye holes. Dad. I know you like a really good. Goodbye. You don't get to just end, so get ready. I'm about to end this podcast. All right.

[00:47:45]

You prepared emotionally for the end of this. Because here it is. Goodbye. I want to say, hey, hey, I got. Hey.