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Welcome, everybody, to the Tell Me and Hector show Wittner Rita it Blewitt, we are here in the henhouse. Hope you're all well in these early stages of 2021 and this is the first podcast of the New Year.

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Hey, I was lying on the couch.

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He sounds like something an old grindcore would say when he's ejaculated, trying to be like, oh, still again the wanking is back in again.

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He will be. Lighten it up, you.

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Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

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Oh, yuck. That sounds rotten. Anyway, I was laying on the couch last Saturday night and we all got ready to watch the show. Tommy and I have to bring this up. Oh, yes. When we looked at your face, when the armed man walked in with the red hair, the journeyman, the eyes, and when we heard that he transported a piece of fire from Norway, well, I swear to God, I said, this is going to be beautiful.

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How did they find people like that? You don't. Wouldn't they? Wouldn't you?

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Yeah, an amazing young fella, because he just and now he wasn't he wasn't able to tell a short story and to really go on.

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Yeah. We were a good while there. Like he was talking he was telling us another story that took to tell us the story about Norway. He had to tell us a story about Peru.

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And we were a half an hour into Peru and we hadn't even started going yet and got there.

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So a remarkable young fella. And there was a fair amount of I did go on to the social media thing.

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I don't watch the show, but I would keep track of just what people are thinking about it.

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And there was a fair amount of slagging of them going on. And I just hope my sense of it was that it was good. Cracks Lagan. Yeah.

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You know, because he was but I loved him and I thought it was like I said on the show, fellas like that should be there should be an option on the CEO forum.

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That was a lovely point at the end.

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That was a lovely thing you said because but I don't think a fellow like him would get too bogged down on stuff good social media. I don't think he doesn't strike me as someone that will be, too.

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It was just it was it was a lot of it was very funny what they were saying about, you know, the poor fellow. Like he took a fire all the way from Norway.

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And the model was like I for the audience, saw it coming and they saw the show. And for everyone listening on the podcast, I have a few more questions about it, because you were trying to get it out. I wanted to know. He said he was down by the harbor and he saw a pirate ship coming in. He went over to your man.

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Did you mind just give him the boat? Yeah. No, you know what happened, man? Give him a job. Was it not a job in the boat?

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And then you, man, give him a job on the boat to go from one part of Norway to another.

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Right. And then he wasn't incredibly clear how we got from that part Norway to Scotland in the storm.

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And who else is on the boat with him?

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He was trying to he wasn't able to describe anything from from a single point in time.

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Like he he would tell you one bit of information and then he died in something else from another time in another place was hard to follow him. So I it in the actual interview, which lasted over an hour, I had to keep kind of hang on a minute, where are we now and who's watching?

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The most remarkable the most intriguing part was how did he keep that piece of fire alive on the stove, in the stove the whole way.

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But what's also remarkable was that he was saving up money to I don't know, do they include the bit where he was the deliberately wagon commissioned?

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Yes, he went to a travel man and he got the old style barrow up wagons. He got them commission to go around the country because he's a qualified chef making food on the back of those four people. He had to get horse trained in order to have to walk a horse on the busy roads of Ireland. And that that's part of what his whole thing was about, that I did this in order to I could do that.

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A remarkable young fella, you know, he's only young, was the only 24 or 24, 25 when he got to I thought that they would light a massive bonfire because I've been on the Hill and it's owned by David Clarke, this farmer who's very passionate about that land. I thought he's going to like a massive bonfire, but then they extinguish the fire on the top of the bridges.

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They're buried. The fire, the kind of dug a hole and they bury the forest in Mother Earth. Mother Earth. There you go. Wow. That is the epicenter of all fertility in Ireland. That is a great, great notion. He had a lovely head on him. Hardly fantastic.

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Had a dreamer. Pure dreamer. Yeah. And as as I said to you before, the game coach. Sure. Maybe he's right.

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Maybe this right. In terms of the name of this episode.

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Oh, I recorded I have two suggestions. Oh OK. Yes.

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First one. First one in Munich.

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Yes. Yes we saw that one. Yes, yeah. I asked for Munich and the next one is a brochure monster.

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Gladbach, see the picture.

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Have you got any. Well they are coming thick and fast now aren't they. It's a bit like myself. I when I heard Miami Dolphins baron, I said we're veering away to another sport. But then when I saw written. On the podcast, Miami Dolphins band is genius, but there's some really funny people out there. We got another one. What about real basher's real. Just real. Bettie's don't know.

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You see, you're all right. When I said we've got the real issues, you. And give me one more about this one. Fenet St. Petersburg. Fernhurst Fanis Kerry Fenice, you're thinking fat that at St. Petersburg, OK? I don't see you as a very clever with no cracking on for a second.

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Now let's crack cracks in your one to make it OK. You want to make an observation here, Louisa? Yeah, I'm thinking we are told now. I think in contrary to what you told me when he wasn't in that house, looked I today you're all very brave and don't get to stay. What did you say when you went? Well, I think we let to pick one this week because, you know, I didn't say that.

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He said that he seems to impose himself on us at his control is he's got control.

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OK, let's have a vote. Let's have a vote. What was the first thing already?

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Sounds like a fucking coup d'état.

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Well, what was the first thing Che Guevara and Real Bettys told?

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OK, well, I'll be happy if real Bettie's town is not because it's me, right? Well, Bettys real Pettys town.

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Hector, if you have to explain the joke, it's not a joke.

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It's a crossword puzzle. No, but it's a better use of words than anybody who came up with these.

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Funny. It's Schwerin, Munich or in Munich here. And that came in this morning, didn't it, from Oren? Yes.

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And for a man who doesn't look at social media, he's very off on these very off. Very, very off Off-Air.

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You get used to it. I knew her well. She was a sister darn face. So how do we work to see there's a problem? Because the three of us. So I get the deciding vote.

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You decide Soliris, you know, I don't get sick anyway.

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I mean, maybe show Warren Munich. OK, four in Munich. Welcome to the show.

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I want to talk about heroin. Sorry, I just said is the next thing we're going to talk about love and Tommy. Kind.

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I think we opened up the Christmas box. God, I want to talk about hush.

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I want about heroin because I've never done it. I have no interest in doing it. But I've always been really struck by the people that you see in the street who have taken it and how they're physical. People talk about the physical feeling of heroin. They talk about, as in this fella said to me one time, it was like fallen through a bed of feathers. And that is the. And I would see a fallacy on a bit of cardboard in a car park in Dublin, and he's after getting a lack of it and when I think I don't think there is anybody on Earth who's.

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Interior is in such collision with their exterior at the moment of the at the height of their highness, what they're feeling on the inside. It's their floorman, every cell in their body is a fuckin gospel choir singing Hallelujah, and they're been fucking their backs are being stroked with gorgeous feathers there. There are explosions of pure delight in their body inside their bodies.

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Outside of their parties, they're dressed in fuckin rags, they're damp, they're called on cardboard in the corner of a fucking car park and there's piss stains and there's half a fucking sandwich on the ground and they're just fucked.

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I'm always with it's just strikes me. Is that the difference between the two, the difference? I don't think there's no further extremism, is there?

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Oh, yeah, I know what you mean from what's inside and what's the reality. It's like as drugs go, as drugs go, it's it's right up there isn't it.

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It's fucking. But isn't it like getting really, really strong painkillers, like horrendously strong painkillers after surgery where you feel that the feel of like, you know, like those opioids, they're like, yeah, you know, that's a you feel that again, like I know I took them after I had surgery on my foot. And you do feel this like, oh my God, I feel like you're not you couldn't possibly be on this earth when you're taken.

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Really? Yeah. In terms of pleasure, just in terms of having absolutely no feelings whatsoever.

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Just like no more. Just like your brain is over ridden by this tablet. And it's a it's a nice it's a nice feeling to be on them, but obviously they're controlled and you and maybe the dosage isn't as much as when people take heroin via needle for the first few times.

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It's just I mean, like, once you go there, you just can't really like these very few that come back on Stakeholder's now. Well, I yeah.

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I mean, you'd have to say that that would be the general. Anybody who has survived addiction would never encourage you to take it recreationally. Yeah, well, not that you know what I mean.

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And I guess was kind of shocking is what's and what's really sad actually is when you hear about towns like Galway. And the guards make an Hawash stand here and Baharuddin go away and you kind of think, OK, Gorgie was always known for hash and then, you know, Golby was known for pills in the 90s, in the 90s, always, you know, there's always some bad bastard who could get your cocaine.

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And but the heroin thing just seems it's like, oh, fuck off, we have enough troubles without this arrival in the town meetings.

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Every every rural town in Ireland has a heroin problem from not not. Yes, they do. Yes, they do. Yes, they do. And I'm telling, you know, most county bailing out other balance heroin.

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Absolutely. There's no pocket of heroin uptake. And I don't believe. All right.

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Well, then, Castlebar, no, I don't think it's illegal to treat everyone. Westport's No. Rita NAVAN Oh, well, maybe not, Laurita.

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It's it's rampant, unfortunately, in this country and it's riddled this country. If I don't want to be it's not today. It's not a prime time on this fucking point. That's what it is. I'm not saying it's acceptable, is there? No, but it is.

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I'm saying if it's acceptable that there's cocaine and this is allowed in, well, it's inevitable that you're going to get to that level of cocaine. And Ballona. Yeah, it's cocaine and bloody fox for it, I presume.

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But I wouldn't think there'll be coke and heroin. They're lying. Probably there's probably cocaine and Namor like, but fishing for a lovely throat along the way.

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They're like, you know, it's it's life like for the cocaine story.

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But then the heroin is going to come next because people don't have, other devotees have addiction problems and they take cocaine. And then is it their next step to go or want more? I need more from that.

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Or is it completely different it for somebody? Well, I don't know.

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I'm just sayin my, my, my I'm just always struck by the sadness.

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I know I'm struck by the book and the power of the trip that the person has experience and magic and the and the and where the fuck. And sitting down. It's it's as I mean, it's as if they're sitting on a horrendous pain and they just that's their escape.

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Like their home. Like I stayed in the hotel. I'm not going to name where it was, but there's an alleyway that I'd have to use sometimes going into the to get into this place. And there's two there was two massive industrial dustbins. And I and there was syringes always there. And I'd seen it for a long time. And then one morning as I was walking by, it was two lads in there and they just young lads backpacks and they were stretching, stretching the arm and another lad and then another lad and I just walked along.

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And that is the that is the other side of Atami because from seeing that there and the back of an alleyway in a rat ridden behind a massive dustbin, there they were. And this and then two minutes later on, a magic carpet ride to Utopia. And that's just fucking mad to think that there is a drug like that on the planet that constantly organised Afghani opium fields from the poppy fields of Eastern Europe, of Afghanistan and places that it's it's been on the ark for millenniums of years, the poppies.

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And it's probably more people on on prescribed medication than there is on heroin. Well, you may be fucking sure of that. Yeah, absolutely.

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But how about the Ayahuasca? Would you like to try it? Stavisky is this plant from the Amazon? Absolutely. And you take it in now there's I know people have gone to housing estates in Kalvin, the fucking the better. Herbert Sharman, who would take you on a trip? It's a kind of a it's kind of like very powerful Holy Communion, like, oh, I've never had a trip on the know.

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Like, if you if it was like a leaf or something, I think it's there.

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Boil it down to a little liquid and you you take it OK.

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Now you have to be in special has to be someone mind you, someone has done it before. Someone who's happy when you start to panic, some people fly to the Amazon to do some people take the post casualty.

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I wouldn't like generous, but there are people who will mind you, you know, and you sit in a house like, well, yes, it does matter where you sit.

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You could be in a fucking shack 45000 miles from fucking Rio de Janeiro, the jungle.

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Or you could be in the front room of 44 Sycamore Drive, Carnarvon town with all the cushions run the floor and the plastic bags on the windows.

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Stop the light coming in and you take it and you vomit. You vomit for a good hour and a half. You just vomit. You're vomiting up all your fucking resistance. That's what's coming out here.

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So it just makes you vomit. You know, in the beginning, it makes you sick.

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So you this is a 14 hour trip like so you vomit for the first hour. You have a bucket beside, you just lay up and then it starts. Then you see things like a fuckin a tiger. And you didn't even know there were tigers.

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And Kavin and Tiger might walk through the wall and come over and he's smelly.

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And you'd be sitting there shitting yourself because you've got a African. Ten stone heavier tigers lost 27 29 Tiger, you're shitting yourself from the book, an unreal about the Tiger, and you look into his eyes. It's a really small little Marty Morris's identity. And then the tiger might lick your face. He might bite your head off. And you've got another 12 hours of this. You might your body might leave the earth and you go up and you, you know, start talking to you.

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You'd see the ghosts of everybody you're ever related to. You might see your children's children's children. You might get a vision of Buddha or Christ. Bobby Charlton might see a great big but you might see great people.

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And in 14 hours of this foreign trip, you will be in a forest, a waterfall.

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You could be anywhere but so transported that you might you might have to relive things that you've done in your life that you feel bad about and have you control over that and relive your trip.

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And now you really love them. And you might you might be crying and will weep and for stuff that you've done and maybe this is where the shaman comes in and guide you through it and give you a drink of water. A peppermint still continue to sing in the background. The chanting continues.

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Oh, what a cure. Well, I was just going to say it made 46. If you're in Montgomery Drive, I don't think it makes any any difference.

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If you're in Kavan or you're in Mexico for us, that's OK. But that's what happens when you're sitting in the room.

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It's kind of like a tiger comes in and not, you know, if you're having if you're having a pint of Porter in Kell's is one thing.

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Having it in Abu Dhabi is another.

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Yeah, right. So I get it. Yeah.

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So, so well a lot of people would say after taking it is that they resolve things. I know this one fellow who took it on here, he was engaged to a woman and he had it done the partner and he'd split up with her after that. And when he took his ayahuasca, that's what he fucking went through. He went through that over and over and over again. And I don't know from what perspective he saw it, but he wept.

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He had a weeping trip and he said it got to he came out of it a day and a half later and he phoned her. And he said, I'm sorry for that, so it has that kind of effect on people as well. I mean, that's not just is it does it have to last that long or could you just say organized the trip for an hour? Can I trip for two hours? No, I think it's I think it's once you're in, you're you're in, you're in you're in for the long haul.

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And do you generally come out of it fixed then if you've got an out of body, experience your mind just like, say, for instance, he suffered during that time, was he when he came back around and went out and rang his girlfriend or whatever, was he just fine then?

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Was it like a psychologically? Yeah, it was kind of confession. He phoned her and he apologized.

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And this is it happen 15 years before. Like, this was an old wound, he was in his early 40s as it happened, and 20s feed before he went, and that was something that was modern. No idea. He didn't know it was bothering him. Oh, yeah. That's what I wonder now.

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You have to be I'd say in these positions, you want to be doing this with friends, you know, a group of strangers.

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We get the man from Gavin to come down here and give it to us.

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And then we do the podcast and the three of us in the fucking three separate corners, I'd be weeping and I'd be in a shamanic Africanism like it's pretty.

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I don't think I'd like that. I mean, what do you want afterwards? Or what if people are looking for a revelation or what would you want to take that again? Or would you want something else then?

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Or I think I know people who have taken it a few times, but it's very popular now.

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It's one of those underground movements where you may be sure that there are you could get a phone number off someone you know. That would put you in touch with someone who can get you ayahuasca in Caplan anywhere. I mean, I, I often thought I've been with a shaman a couple of times on my trips in South America. And I've been I've been blessed by shaman in different places and taken different medication that potions that they've made for me because they've request I've asked them for specific requests, but I've never taken the Ayahuasca.

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But I would prefer to take ayahuasca deep in the Colombian jungle or in Peru or the Amazon and take it above. And 46 restarted because I don't know if it's full.

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I don't know are important.

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The Ayahuasca is a 100 percent pure who's getting it as the thing who's getting it and is an ayahuasca cunt or.

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Yeah, yeah, it's a special herb and they mix it up, but it's an ancient Aztec Mayan Indian.

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They'd probably bunkhouses of years get here thousands of years. They've been taken in South America for four journeys. I imagine your soaring up over the jungle, you become a bird and off you go.

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Then for 12 hours, did we take magic mushrooms one night and end up in the bar?

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I never liked magic mushrooms. All of a sudden, about twelve people on each shoulder dancing on top of me pushing me.

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You do you remember that we took magic mushrooms one night and we ended up down in and we ended up in a bar, the old Punchbag theater the front of us had they turned it into a kind of a music nights and we ended up there talking to two families from in and around me, loud area. And you convinced me and I was fucking convinced I had to go up and talk to the guy from the clubs to get these folks out, that there were two gay Irish lads who were having an affair but were run out of load by the IRA for being gay, IRA.

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And they this is while you were out there.

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They knew that we knew and they were going to kill us.

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So I had to go up to the fellow who was involved. You know, I fucking did.

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I said, listen, look at them two boys in the corner. There are two gay aerialists and they know they've been there have been kicked out and dick for being gay, the cab brigade Dira, they don't like it.

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Josee them two boys. It just complicates things.

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It's one thing going to the jungle without the two boys talking to their gay and what happened. And they want to kill us because they know what gay and.

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Well that's what I said. Do you remember that night. What did he do. He just looked at me in the way and he said, Thanks, Tommy. I will keep an eye on that for sure.

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Those were the days when people used to go out to the racecourse in September. Oh, that's right.

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The Galway racecourse would be fucking damp.

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People that don't store mushrooms are magic mushrooms, pigeon pot clubs all over the country.

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We've gone through it now. September, October. I was at a party. I was at a birthday party of a lad out in a castle outside called were there a couple of years ago. We stopped the van, you know, walked in.

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It was like walking in. It was just a and there was firefighters and dancers and vampires and multicolored neon lights and a castle lit up and there was a massive electric picnic, as would anybody. And so it a couple of hundred people there. This old ambulance with the side of the ambulance open the decks inside. It was brilliant. Loads of characters. Three o'clock in the morning, the Spanish paper stars that honoris stand at the back of the dance floor.

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And Mango Song was a key part of Carlos Mushes strongest. That's that's what they call it in Spain. Lasseter's and the Spanish love magic mushrooms, and they believe that Ireland is the epicenter for magic mushrooms in the world.

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These two lads showed me what they had, I said and I said that they have mushrooms and it's Evinger went round the back to the car park where the cars were parked at the back of the castle. I'm not joking here.

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They had a MICRA one nine one micro, a rental car, and your man opened the back of the rental car and took out a quilt like a double bed quilt and opened it. I'd say there was about 20000 mushrooms stock with the moisture to the inside of the quilt.

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It was like opening up a Fort Knox bullion. Gold it was. He just pushed it out and he put it on the bonnet of the car. There must've been 25000 mushrooms there and they had come from Spain.

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I said that they picked them or did they buy them and they picked them. Tommy picked them here. Yes.

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And they were driving around Ireland, going to Paris, selling them know, having great crack themselves. It was a readymade pharmaceutical thing in the car. They had their they had their mushrooms. They stocked the mushroom with the natural moisture stuck to the inside of the duvet. And he opened it up and it was just like that. And did you take a fistful?

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We took it. We took a blanket and we went back into Ireland and mushrooms.

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Mushrooms. Nah, I don't like mushrooms. Mushrooms?

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No, I took some in Amsterdam and I laughed for a solid four hours. That's all it did to me. It just made me laugh, but everything. And this woman got back in and she was looking for fifty cents and we ascertained that she was fifty cents mother. You, the poor woman now, we did give her money, what we were just laughing so much, la, la, la, la, la, Mexican, my friend was in Thailand and you know, those full moon parties that give you magic mushrooms shakes.

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And she said she had she had a full one by herself and she said she really shouldn't have. And she just got completely lost. And she was walking down the speech and she was like, absolutely outrageous. And she saw this fella.

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She met this Irish fella and he was shifting a dog and she thought, well, and he thought he thought he was just in person, but she said it was the worst.

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How would you shift like that? Like was he opened the back of her. He was laying on the beach. The dog was probably the French kissing the Labrador. Yeah. Fuck me.

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I took it as with a heroic dose of fuckin acid one night and I was walking around Galway and the go to the moving floor was one of the called travellers.

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Yeah. Escalators. You know, these are on the go. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like the whole city was a fucking travel leisure and I was like I said you were stopped and there was movement. I was no I get it all the way from er square down to fucking birds. Lived in a house in a new road and ended up partner. And I made the fatal mistake of going into a room by myself and I had a tape of the soundtrack of The Last Temptation of Christ by Peter Gabriel.

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OK, and I put it on and I couldn't take my eyes off the fucking wall for a data.

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Oh, la la la la la la la. Ah, you were roaring.

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I was just fucking tripping out on the Temptation of Christ, all about the devil and the fuckin Palestinians.

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And Hello, Samiullah. I never took acid again. Yeah, back in the day, it was strawberries, strawberries, sheets, microdots. I owe the tips of the NIB's of a pencil. Yeah, it's all Letterkenny above a pencil.

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I know where you went four days. Did you have trips?

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An alarm that everyone has a trip on the island, honey. You actually have a pair of denim dungarees and long hair like you remember Leif Garrett. Oh yeah.

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He was in Iowa. So I have memories of meeting actor it long curly hair down to her shoulders, denim dungarees, cornrows, a T-shirt and astronomer's T-shirt and live on the island.

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Look, I went to the Ahran Islands and I went on a journey and the journey took six months to find myself. So I had to just fish and feel the air and the breeze and sun splashed cottage and e at that. It's funny that that cottage we lived in at the old Quai Inishmaan looked straight out at the village of Inácio. Oh, that's right.

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The magic mushrooms. Magic mushrooms, I mean. Those two Spaniards had came to Ireland in a rental car because we at the epicenter of it and I'll never forget that image when he opened up the quilt. It's like it's like a mom commenting on a major pavlova for Sunday that they were in their element by element.

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But isn't you always hear of people who didn't come back from their trips?

[00:27:51]

No, I was just gonna say, how do you know which mushrooms you can got fried some of the neural pathways got over, right? Yes.

[00:27:58]

Like, you know, I know more than I put in or too much whiskey.

[00:28:01]

How do they react then? But it just it wouldn't be fit first off. And there might be people who end up in psychiatric hospitals who wouldn't be fit for much like you'd be frazzled, you'd have singed a few of the wires in your head and there's no repair in them. Joe, the electrician cannot fix you.

[00:28:17]

What you need is a safe place with their food and safe paper and no stress and no shift in dogs, no shift in dogs and nothing. Just safeness. That's all you need.

[00:28:29]

So there's a new finish or it's not a new thing, but it's a finished tradition. Right. And it's called Punch Drunk. It translate the Finnish word, but in it translates to English as punch drunk. So basically what the Finnish people do is they sit at home and they drink in their underpants, they get drunk in their underpants and they send like little pictures and little emojis to each other. And instead of, like, the horny thing.

[00:28:54]

No, I don't think so. It's so I thought because now we're all going to have to be at home, that we should embrace this tradition in Ireland. I was thinking you might come up with an Irish word for it.

[00:29:08]

Punster Anchorite is basically so you know, in Ireland we have a tradition of previous to to covid where we would drink at home and maybe go out afterwards and they will get too drunk. Whereas in Finland they just sit at home, take off their trousers, sit in the women. The women are going to wonder where are they? Send send a selfie to the friends and say, have a drink with me at home in your house. Remarkable.

[00:29:33]

And it's not horny. No, it's not something wrong with. Just get down to your underpants. There's not a sexual predator with your underpants like you're in your underpants. You're in boxers. And these bottles. Could we to put it we called one called Boxer r.g. It's all you see. You are just joking.

[00:29:49]

I know. So how could we. Well, first of all, a lot of Irish people in their boxers and their dogs tongued Cox. Oh, but don't encourage people to put them on and say yes, because everyone has a tongue and they have little emojis on their phone, you know, like your little man there to tell me that you have they've got little ones with men in there, like an underpants one for men and a beer. And they've got women with like a gin and the bikinis.

[00:30:18]

But how many people in Ireland would be happy if you go to Yamato's and had dinner party and the boys? No, no, no.

[00:30:23]

But this is a separate thing. Or you don't do it together.

[00:30:25]

Don't go to school with your wife or your wife is in our in our in our bra and our knickers sitting on the couch. Either weather, you know, traumatic on the children, you know, it gets dark.

[00:30:36]

You see, obviously early in Finland, the less light. And that's what they do at night because they can't go out, they don't have money, you know, big social events, blah, blah, blah. And so. Yeah. So I was reading it in The New York Times and they were trying to, you know, get Americans into it now because the Colford. But I think here in Ireland, we should like to have our own version of it.

[00:30:58]

Who are they sending the photographs to? To their friends like. So instead of going to the pub with their friends.

[00:31:04]

Yeah, right. But that would just develop into your bank and the bank first.

[00:31:09]

No, seriously, it's it's it's the minute you put your underpants on, you have you're compelled to have what I'm look at all as opposed to the voters he's above in the bungalow.

[00:31:21]

No, I'm going to I was just on to something else. I have another question about that. A second.

[00:31:28]

Girls like you can't you can't think that. How can you'd get a variety of people in there? Because there's one thing for sure.

[00:31:38]

There is Jock sitting there having a beer. We've seen them images a million times. Homer Simpson, some of them are great.

[00:31:44]

Some of them aren't great. But we got a kind of a stripped down to our Brian Nichols 98 percent of what was gonna happen.

[00:31:49]

I didn't like the dailies. Er, how are you going to have a little gin and tonic. Er oh yeah.

[00:32:00]

Strong finish to finish the finish, maybe become sexually repressed as we are we see there and we have to turn everything into sex.

[00:32:09]

Ireland is thrumming with sexual energy. So any of minute you've got your underpants on, you feel like you cannot. There's too little a barrier there that you have to put your hand into the underpants and start. You send somebody a photograph of you drinking in your bra.

[00:32:24]

You may as well be saying come round to the house. Right. You know. Because the fucking truth. And if I leave this job yet, filthy prick, you know, a man would only be drinking the jokes after he had the right I to be opposed. Right photograph. Oh, all right.

[00:32:44]

Go oh, go. Tonight, please.

[00:32:47]

Hey, can I just say that was one of the nicest adjectives I've heard on the show so far. Just throwing it in Ireland is thronging with sexual energy because.

[00:32:57]

So how would we put our own spin on that? What would we have to do to make a nun got away with that?

[00:33:03]

Who shall we turn to where you could wear your O'Neills football shorts?

[00:33:07]

And still it's the women taking their clothes off. You can't see like what? Or so you just want me to cope with. But she just be able to get pictures from men.

[00:33:15]

Then if that was to be more disturbing, if one of the neighbors sent me a photograph of, say, some of the fiercest fuckin Icelandic storm landed in the country and the wind was whipping round the fucking houses and tons of snow around the place, we're all locked inside for three and a half fucking months of shit weather.

[00:33:34]

And I got a picture of one of the neighbors in her bra and knickers. Sure. For fuck's sake, I just come round to see you.

[00:33:51]

You couldn't do that in Ireland. Two were too repressed. But why are we so repressed?

[00:33:56]

Why? Because we were I guess because sex is chaos. Sexual energy is chaos. Why are they not like that in Finland? Mm hmm.

[00:34:06]

And maybe they just have a much healthier attitude and more of an openness that the Catholic Church thing.

[00:34:11]

Well, that's why I went to a swimming pool in Helsinki where you swim in the NIPP inside.

[00:34:18]

So. Yeah, yeah, it's it's a nip. It's a swim in the nipple.

[00:34:22]

I wouldn't like that, you know. And so it's very famous.

[00:34:27]

Like what you do is just you go in and you just fucking strip off and men and women and you just fucking you're just not what that is, you're just swimming by force.

[00:34:37]

Reports on it was like that the fella I was sitting behind this lad. Right.

[00:34:42]

Like if you're doing the worst thing, it's it's awful to get behind the lad doing the breaststroke because what happens if you're in the front crawl, the two legs are together and you just go, oh, or the butterfly.

[00:35:00]

But when I found out when I finished doing the breaststroke, he kicks the two legs. Just the butterfly. That's the butterfly. And you can see the breaststroke is this that's the butterfly.

[00:35:09]

We go a when he opens his legs, you can see his legs. Hector. The butterfly is the one where the two is like the fruit crawl or two arms go at the same time, the breaststroke is when you go out like that in front of you. Oh, and he kicks his legs out like a frog.

[00:35:25]

So I saw that I was doing the breaststroke behind the slide and my head went under.

[00:35:31]

The water coincided with his legs kicking out. All I saw was this fucking octopus of a ballplayer's and just kind of hanging down in front of me. And so I was kind of I was headed in the water and your man's balls and he was looking down on me.

[00:35:55]

I was lifting head up and going, oh, I got the baby's legs.

[00:36:10]

If you had a pool in Ireland where people swim in the next decade before we give you guys. You guys. Yeah.

[00:36:21]

He wouldn't get Croke Park, the crowds to be gathered around the site calling themselves.

[00:36:28]

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. The women are doing a backstroke.

[00:36:33]

We can't even have a nudist beach. It's always, always every summer. And it's turned into a nudist beach. They're now like, we can't do the Irish.

[00:36:40]

We can't disclose all naked people. It's absolutely offensive.

[00:36:44]

Starts on the beach in Spain to see a pair of tits. We can't decide what's gone.

[00:36:49]

What's up to fucking 600 different capital cities all over the world within a minute.

[00:36:53]

But I ah, the fact that we're kind of slightly sexually repressed, I think it probably does mean it's banning sex is probably more exciting to us. And it's more is more happening in sex. When two Irish people get together, people who are very relaxed and casual about sex might be mean as much to them.

[00:37:10]

You know, we're like starving people getting a burger.

[00:37:13]

You know, you're fucking hot in the first time, so you haven't eaten in three days.

[00:37:18]

Then someone gives you a fucking Big Mac. We're rip open the fucking box and they just fucking sauce all over your mouth and your fingers on gimpy fucking ketchup and onions.

[00:37:30]

Oh. Oh, fucking.

[00:37:34]

They're just go over and get your phone broken. It's not that good. What's it called again. And just one more time. Unstrung.

[00:37:54]

Oh oh oh no.

[00:38:00]

I wanted to bring up at the start when we're talking about your man that brought the fire from nowhere, I was there. Imagine, what could I do, what would I bring as a sacrifice? And I said I take a bag of chips from a chipper and Navin. And bring it all the way down to a chipper and anchor, but does he have to have division, Hector? So you have to and you have to be open to division and you have to not use these daydreams are come into your head.

[00:38:27]

And we dismiss this young fella got one of them fucking daydreams, but he didn't dismiss it.

[00:38:33]

I know that. And I really love that. I opened itself up to the power of what he thought he could do.

[00:38:39]

And it just went, this is mad. This is like.

[00:38:43]

This is Jeremy, the Britain Indiana Jones, where he's standing on the fucking cliff edge and he's to walk across the far side and the rocks are so jagged that he he is he can't see the path, but when he steps off the ledge, the path of the path becomes obvious.

[00:38:59]

Yeah, I know. I know. I know that young fella was like that. You know, he was just incredibly driven by, well, what would you do as a same?

[00:39:06]

Would you would you bring a size five? Would you swallow a size five football from the club?

[00:39:10]

All you have to have look at it. You have to have the. Division of us, and you have to wear to division if it comes to you and when and if it does, like a friend of mine, friend of yours, to have to, you know, walked one time from Navan as far as Kazunori left the house, just didn't tell anybody to walk in an amount of sound mind and head and body.

[00:39:35]

He got Kesselring because that's where his grandparents were buried and he walked from Novant Kazunori to visit his grandmother's grave. Now, it's not a fuckin remark. Yeah, remarkability walk the walk.

[00:39:48]

But really here he walked the whole way and he must have been in a certain frame of mind when he left the house to allow himself to fucking do that. Mightn't have explained to his wife and children where he was fucking gone. You know, maybe they were kind of half worried about him. Maybe he left word, said I'd be gone for a few days. Maybe he thought he was going for a drive. And he was sound of mind and body and soul.

[00:40:08]

He walked. He only had the clothes on him and his wallet. He cut his finger on some bushes the first day and he bled a little bit and he ended up wiping on his trousers and a shirt. So he said he went into Penneys and he bought a full fucking change of clothes, socks, just shirts and trousers and fucking got the new clothes, put them on to the clothes in the bin and he walked to Cassandre. So what's happening to you?

[00:40:33]

There is you're kind of walking into a state of mind, a state of mind that you can't access in your car. You're three days on the road. You're you're in your own imagination. And and the further you walk, the stronger it's becoming. This world that you're in. You went into the graveyard to visit the grandmothers graves. And out of the fucking true story, Alad comes up to them grave. You're looking for her. Give her the give your man the name.

[00:41:01]

He says, Oh, yeah, I went to school with her daughter. I know. I know. Well, where she's buried. Took all to the grave. Oh yeah. They've got Chaton and you're not from around here. Delate said it is. No, no, no. I'm from from Navan. And they said, Oh Navdanya, I've never been digicam Digicom, the Athlone. And my friend said, no, I didn't do what any man because he did not you and you he it he did not.

[00:41:24]

I did. You walked from Navan to Cassandre. I did. It took me three days. I fucking walked it. And that is what I'm doing away with this. He does know who he's talking to, what kind of a strange man does something like that. And then he says, the lad says, imagine this. Now he says, you might do me a favour then, my friend Goslar. And he says, Keep walking. Will you walk from here to the Basilica and Knock and Gwinn that church and say a prayer for me and whatever state of mind my people had walked into?

[00:41:57]

He didn't. He said I will only commit a further two days walking from Cassandre to knock out into the fuckin basilica and said a prayer for the man he met in the graveyard. Now, that's the type of thing that people need to know about and that that that kind of act is still possible in Ireland.

[00:42:18]

I mean, was that this is about seven or eight years ago. We we live in a country where stuff like that is still possible. You know, where we have there's an ancient ness to it is that part of our mind hasn't totally fucking closed over, you know. So in that young fella was talking about, I had a vision that I had to take this fire from Norway to eternal part of us. It makes us laugh and makes us a bit giddy and we sluggish because we're not entirely comfortable with it.

[00:42:43]

But part of us absolutely understands that he that John Farley is one of us and one of us is capable of that type of work and dreman because he's one of us and being Irish, that that part of your brain never, never closes over. It's almost like having it.

[00:43:00]

And it's an experience. It's an he's he's gone into an experience that nobody else could have. It's incredible. Yeah.

[00:43:07]

I tell you another strange story. My mind blown open and that's a true story.

[00:43:12]

And me and Tommy know that man and we know that. And I think you know that man well.

[00:43:17]

Well, there was no mention of that when he was telling the story. He told many people he didn't know. Yeah. He didn't look for any publications or any old not man walks to glory. He just did it.

[00:43:27]

I'll tell you another short story now that will just the dimensions of Irishness. We were drinking one night, Wikler, or whatever one of them fuckin WWOR places anyway. And it was after a show.

[00:43:42]

And we in this kind of kind of a wagon wheel type of a bar, kind of a Western fuckin influence on it. Genom we've got David Mustafina, me fellow Banditos were there and were having a few full campaigns and people are coming over and there was a young one I'd say she was about.

[00:43:57]

Now humans are always coming up to me. Young ones are always looking, you know, and they all going to get a photo taken with you. And it's fine, partner. You throw your arm around them, they snuggle up to you for the photograph, and then they turn to and say, well, my granddad thinks you're hilarious.

[00:44:11]

But so there's this young woman there.

[00:44:14]

She's from, as I can see, and she's her hair is almost purple, black, you know, and she's got beautiful white skin.

[00:44:22]

And she's kind of and she seems to be making more of an effort with herself than anybody else around.

[00:44:29]

You know, she's extra good lookin and she's kind of extra fancy and Durah mean and she seems she's fine like you know, I was just aware of this, as aware as everybody else in the room, you know, and people are fucking drinking and drinking and drinking and drinking and she's starting to show off more and more and more, you know, and just as fucking strange fucking kind of spirit drink confidence about her.

[00:44:57]

There was a pool near the couch where we were put on when he's kind of fucking horseshoe shaped couches and there's a fucking pool there, you know, like Pool Dunson and what it was like, I think it could have been maybe it's a structural thing, but it wasn't.

[00:45:09]

That fucking thickener is a man thing.

[00:45:12]

Next thing she starts, she fuckin climbs up on it and she starts doing fuckin pole dancing on it.

[00:45:20]

Right.

[00:45:20]

I look at me, look around, she's fucking she's eyeball and me and she's fucking doing all is actually not a bad fucking Paul just fucking seemed like.

[00:45:28]

But she's not bad.

[00:45:30]

Lexing She falls off the fucking porn right onto the couch. Right. She falls back, she's laughing and she gets up. Her hair stayed on the couch. And it was, I swear to God, my memory is even the fuckin music stopped. She just she the creator had alopecia. Oh, right, right. And she just fuckin in that microsecond, all of that confidence just fucking disappeared.

[00:46:09]

There she was looking for a woman who would look at herself in the mirror and be struggling with. Yeah. With that particular ailment, but is able to fuckin put on a show show and has the fuckin hair and everything. And she just fucking she started going and she started screaming, Jesus, Jesus.

[00:46:33]

And she must have been like a born again Christian from York because I'm going to hell. The devil has got a place for me in hell.

[00:46:41]

I'm going to bar now because I'm a dirty girl. I'm a dirty, dirty, dirty girl.

[00:46:48]

The poor thing. Like she was fuckin like she was screaming at herself.

[00:46:51]

Just ahead, I'm going to hell.

[00:46:52]

I'm going to a bar and to some of these naughty fuckin evangelicals out there with the fucking fundamentalist Christian heads in them like Jesus.

[00:47:02]

Jesus is not the Lord God Almighty. Well, ranging from Baghdad on the third day, she is just one of that. I'm going to hell. I'm going to burn in hell. I am. Oh, my goodness.

[00:47:15]

So the other women do you OK, other women just took fucking care of her. And, you know, we're all stand in the same hotel. And they I guess they just focused, as everybody wanted to do, was to make sure she was OK and that but she set herself up like she it was the fact that she was putting herself on parade and then that's what fucking happened.

[00:47:40]

I saw the following morning raw chicken checking out, though, to. I go down to reception at about 11 o'clock and I have a bright and sunny Sunday morning and I see her there with her pal and I have to walk past them to get I would if I could have, I would have. I can just not yet not wanted to remind them of what had happened the previous night. So I but I had to walk past them. So I had to look and say something.

[00:48:11]

And the closer I got, I saw that the week was fucking on all right. But it was on the runway. It was all lopsided, like like it was just fucking disheveled. Yeah. Like anyone's hair after a Saturday night, she just hadn't put it on. Right.

[00:48:30]

And it was kind of hard just all over the place.

[00:48:34]

So I went up and I just says, well, how are you all? And she looked up at me with the fucking hair and she looked at me, the sparkle back in her eyes that I was some fucking crack last night.

[00:48:45]

Hey. And that's they are beautiful.

[00:48:49]

And that's the kind of the spirit of Irishness is that something awful can happen to you.

[00:48:56]

But the following morning, you're able to say that he was just able to fuck and bounce back and go.

[00:49:01]

And I swear to God known what had happened and the wig book and on paff, sideways and backwards.

[00:49:07]

And you didn't do a Larry David on it and said, you know, as you just said, there was some crack last night. Hey, that was beautiful.

[00:49:16]

That's all from us this week. Ladies and gentlemen, hope you've enjoyed this week's show and whether you're listening on the way to work or on the way to bed or out for a while. Thanks for subscribing, everybody.

[00:49:25]

And we hope you find yourselves over the next. Let's find each other over the next month or so. Tawara, as I say, and foja on.

[00:49:59]

This podcast is part of the Acasti creator network.