Welcome to This Is Important. A production of NPR Radio, the show where we talk about what's obviously most critically, crucially important this week on this is important wooden turtles. Are we all having the same ideas? You also said that it lands in the back of your hair and tells you how to fuck and you called it a rat to eat.

And I started screaming and I'm naked just with just water in the bathtub. And my mom comes running in there drinking and smoking, and they're seven years old. And here we go. Mm hmm. What's the deal? Are you eating sushi? Yes. You can't do that right now. They're sanitized.

What is the fish? The fish are sanitized.

The people you put the fish on and eat it all very seriously.

Oh, welcome to the very first hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot podcast from the guys formerly known as the guys that created workaholics.

But now we're known as the. This is important, guys.

I thought we were all going to I thought we were going to be podcast boys, your podcast.

Well, we are podcast boys for sure. But I thought podcast. Kyle, the name of it. I'm podcast. I thought the name of it is this is important because it is. Yeah, this is the name of it.

And that's the first thing we'll talk about is how important the name is, how important it is for the four of us have a and who's here just because I can't see you guys way over there. That's true.

Hey, I'm a podcast. Blake, how is everybody doing? Really good podcast. Blake, this is podcast.

Adam Oh right. Doing pretty good over here. Podcast Kyle or podcast wanders over here. Caster's podcast.

And together we are podcasters. Not together we're this is.

Yeah this is. Oh and I'm so sorry. I should have read that.

So like Ders and I just recently did something pretty cool. Blake's wearing the hat shark week baby.

I'm not anad but we tune in. It could be an ad if they want to. Yeah. If they want to pay for it.

Do you think Discovery Channel will at will drop some coin on us.

I doubt it. It was pretty cool though. We got to go to the Bahamas. That was my first big outing since the Wrona has struck. We got to go to the Bahamas, got fully tested before going out there. And so we all knew that everybody was wrong and everyone had it.

Everyone had it. You had to test positive herd immunity on the tribe, huh?

But I caught myself just like touching people probably more than I normally would. But like you guys, I was just like, kind of.

Yeah. Oh, because of lack of human contact. And I know that they don't have it right. And you haven't touched another person so goddamn long. Yes.

And you get the green light. You're Hanzi.

These guys did have a certain musculature that made you want to grab oh my God.

These, these professional shark divers. Can we talk about how fucking hard they were? Please do. I'm over here waiting. I wasn't there. I'm not going to stop you give me the description and wrongly read it.

Oh, long. There is no for real. There was this dude Andre that was I mean he a local Bahaman gentleman. Oh man.

Bahamian bom bom bom bom bom bom.

I mean I ripped dude just like like and he had like this wetsuit. Yeah.

I was his wetsuit so much cooler it was like there was no branding, no nothing. It was like he made it.

I mean yeah it was very cool. He look like Black Panther. He looked like he was trying to get cast in some shit that's tight.

And that dude is Andre. I follow him on Instagram because he was one sexy, smart, nice guy. Mm hmm.

Yes. And listen and give him a follow.

But we got to do something like truly gnarly shit. There was like a sunken ship and then we drove right down to it and then there was like twenty five sharks and they're swimming all around us. We got like hit in the head with a tiger shark fin, which was pretty gnarly. Ders got attacked.

He's a shark attack survivor, got attacked by a genuine tiger shark. That's all I'm going to say. You got to watch to see what happened.

Yeah, it was going to say it sounds like you're doing the audio version of what people should be watching after this airs. Yeah, well, you know what we're all about spoilers here at this is important.

This is important to let you know what you're going to watch. Right. And it also I think you've done enough in terms of piquing the interest of people. Don't give it away. Make them watch the discussion.

Yeah, there's some really crazy stuff. We haven't even talked about a UFO that showed up for sure. Yeah, yeah.

Just several species of sharks you didn't even know existed. Oh, yeah. Those alien sharks. That was crazy.

When was the shark, Nate? Well, I don't want to. There was a Sharknado. Oh I don't want to give it away. There was. That was I realized there was a shark and I know we're also in parts of shark.

You turn around, he goes, and I know you didn't like the way you were looking at him.

Well, that sounds really cool. It's awesome that you guys all got to go. And I was here, you know, back in California. Just it's weird in my garden.

It's weird that they keep they kept making the point that they were glad you weren't there. And I kept saying, that's not cool. But after, like, three or four days, I was like, yeah, you're like that, right?

It kind of does make sense. Yeah. Well, I did some crazy stuff in my garden, too. I put some fertilizer down and I went after some varmints that we're getting from the tomatoes.

Yeah, I had this nightmare trapping the worms out of the sharks of the garden. Absolutely. The worms and the rats and the birds.

You got a. Pick your crop before the birds come, I'll tell you that much. Otherwise, would you share it with them? Do you believe in killing those rats or you like removing them and putting them somewhere else?

I'm a removing guy, but I will I have to know I'll catch them in a cage and then pick them up and move them like fair to another part.

Like you get in your car and take in places. Well, I got that big piece of land right next to me, so I just drop it over the fence and set them free and they're back in.

Yeah, but they may not come right back to your house. You got to get in. The car is as close as I get. I got some B.B. guns and I do take shots. Oh yeah. And the truth comes out.

But I'm, I'm not really trying to hit him because that's nasty. I'm trying to just scare him out of saying what I mean. Are you I mean, you first you change. Kyle, I remember the old days when we used to just murder rats left and right.

Yeah, that's inside the house. I'm down with that, bro.

They're not allowed inside the house in any way, shape or form. Okay.

I got my pets for that. I just rat shape and form. Right. Well, we used to for some context, Kyle Blake and myself used to live together in the house that we shot workaholics allegedly. Can we even say we're colleagues on the podcast?

I think so, yeah. Allegedly we had a big part of my life.

Just we can't I'll take him to court. Allegedly, allegedly was called workaholics, allegedly.

We had a show on for seven seasons on Comedy Central. Allegedly, it was a hit. Oh, we're all in it. We all were in it and created it together, allegedly.

Best show on TV. Right.

If you guys are getting the vibe that we're very scared that anything we could say could be turned against us and that we couldn't just be canceled for saying that we had a TV show, it's morning, allegedly.

We do feel that way. I want to get sued by Viacom, allegedly.

Oh, you might. Yeah, allegedly you might. Yeah, well, we all lived in the house together, and that's not allegedly I'm going. That's facts right there. We did.

And we had a serious, serious rap problem.

Facts, facts. I always forget the number.

Do you guys remember the number that we call it? Like on the one day we call it X amount because it's growing in my head.

I feel like it was legit. Seventeen.

OK, that was that seems right, because I've been telling people like thirty two, I remember like there was this one crawl space in the hall that we could put a trap and it was like I remember going outside and cracking a beer and then we were just here and it's like OK, there's one and then crack another beer. There's another one.

I can't remember if that was the same day or within the few days of the night that I've lost my mind and just wore my boxer shorts and killed multiple rats with Windex and a broom.

Well, that was I know you got one caught in the sink and it couldn't get out. It was scrambling and I was stabbed in Windex.

So that was that that was so it was just like, oh, I can't breathe. Oh, is it even now? The trick is that you got it. And, you know, allegedly I did this. Yeah, yeah. This is all right when rats are in your house.

I mean, they were all over. I would come home, I'd be gone for a few weeks doing whatever and then come home to the house. And, you know, we're not going in each other's room. So that's like dead space in the house. And I'd come home and there'd be like, I don't know, 300 rat pellets on my bedspread.

Yeah, just like say shit. Just truthfully, all their pellets get weird as these pellets. Makes it sound like you laid out food. Right? That's kind of what I did. It was my room definitely left out tons of jaclyn's. Yeah. Definitely had bags and bags of cracklings. Got out jaclyn's please sponsor.

Yeah. You spilled monster. They were all you were trying to create like Ninja Rescue for so much money.

And and so one night I like got fed up and just like sort of snatched and went into the kitchen to get some water late at night like two a.m. or something. And I was just like six rats in our kitchen.

So I sat there all night with a broom and with some Windex and would spray them in the face and then they go blind. And then I beat them to death viciously.

Allegedly. I did this viciously, right with the broom. Meanwhile, my room is closest to the kitchen.

I was just trying to sleep, but I had to.

Hey, Jude, I was saving your life. I believe it. Those rats are going to crawl right up in your grill. Just turn around and just drop a pellet pellet right on my lip.

Yeah, just just remember somebody telling a story about how they're like in their bed with their girlfriend at the time. And the rats were like under their bed scratching that. They were like, oh no. I was like, oh, not that's just that was me and my my ex-girlfriend.

And I remember I told her it was the pipes because you heard like like on the hardwood floor, you heard like the rat like chick right on the on the way in.

And she's like, what's that? And I go, oh it's an old house. It's just old pipes.

You just were like rats, rats rattling rats a rat. Dude, that was great. That would be do.

Can you imagine though if it was a rat, Atsugi who like, jumped in your hair and like, taught you. Fuck, right, there we go with gratitude to the guys who love the idea.

I just watch gratitude for the first time very recently.

What is a red tattoo? Well, it's Pixar. It's a deal, but I thought it was a food. It's OK. Great, great. But we're we're we're using it.

I said it's a Pixar movie and you said. Right. But I thought it was also, you know, it was both of those. But you also said that it lands in the back of your head and tells you how to fuck.

And you called it a ratatouille. And I'm like, how does the dish lean in the back of your hair?

You know, have you seen Ratatouille? Oh, my God. I never seem to understand. It's a movie that stars a mouse. Is the mouse named Ratatouille a rat and.

No, no, no, no, no. Hold on. It's the mouse named. It's a rat named Gratitudes. Basically, basically, I don't know his name. Bullshit is the known as a Ratatouille.

Is its name E.T.? Well, it's debatable.

No one knows. There's no way to find out.

But what I'm saying is he gets in the dude's hair and controls him on how to cook.

That's OK. All right. Thank you. So this was the question, not the question is what is it about? The two is the question was what is right or do we do?

Well, I like what you're doing, which is playing the part of stupid executive is like I imagine I've never seen this movie.

Well, to be perfectly honest, I did not.

Speaking of stupid executives, I didn't I didn't know it was a like a super something.

Is that right? Ratatouille is a dish. Yeah, like a stew. This is where I go. I think we had an argument.

We don't know what the food actually is. I knew it was a food I definitely knew is a movie. That's that's where you're like if you're the food, do you just go this movie, it already like dwarfed our business.

We got in my mind the name of the food you might as well be doing lasagna with. In my mind.

When you said that I imagined imagine a jumbo liar jumping in the back of your hair and telling you how to fuck.

Oh, no, no, not that didn't make sense. That's a different movie. A good movie, but yeah.

Hey, new movie idea too is like a ananth fancy stew type meal. And the whole movie is about being a fancy chef. And then he's like, no, we're going to make this non fancy thing. And then the dude who's like Mr. Fancy Critic comes in and is like Ratatouille sips. It is like, holy shit. Right? This is exactly what I had as a broadcast kid growing up. It's the best thing I've ever had.

That's a spoiler. And that's a beautiful I feel like we spoiled that movie. Where's that Shark Week?

But you know what? Like it was important. It was. And everything I speak about everything.

Hey, Gary, you haven't seen Raditude by now. I'm sorry. We're spoiling it. Yeah. Thank you. Oh, you didn't movie I watched last night. No, I watched allegedly. Allegedly. I watched a legend allegedly starring Tom Cruise.

Great movie.

I watch Pinocchio. Oh yeah. Terrifying. Yeah.

That's got a crazy part. Eeriest movie. And I was high. I was super.

I was like, you know what, Pinocchio and just and just, you know, ate like six out of and I smoked a joint to myself and truly terrifying island.

Yeah. It's been a minute.

Here's the story. Breakdown in like Quickparts. Oh yeah.

It was a 1940s movie. It's so old. Yeah. Burial and then so there's Petto Chapattis, super Italian. Kind of forgot how like.

Yeah he is. Even though his name's Trapattoni, he's the basis of all Italian people from Downton Abbey. Yeah. All the stereotypes is, is Japantown.

Thanks. And he's like really into he's kind of a weirdo.

He's like really into woodworking and just makes clocks and whatever he's trying to party, he rocks all the clocks at lunch, which makes an insane, pretty annoying noise. And him and his cat dance.

So he is his car. That's how you meet the guy? Yeah. This is his Karvelas Pinocchio. And he's like, I wish he was a real boy and then embraced like the star. This fairy comes down. It's like it's a real boy.

What do you wish upon a star? Yeah, but who's wishing you know you're Petero, OK? Cricket is Jiminy Cricket. He's like the host of the movie. Yeah. He gets mereta.

He's the conscience. Yeah. And let him be your guide. Yeah. A little whistle.

Yes, that's what I remember. So anyway, so he becomes a real boy.

The first thing Geppetto does, which is an insane move, is he goes, guess what, you got to go to school today. First day this kid's alive.

Doesn't even spend a day like going to have some fun kid going to the water park or something to a working man, I guess. Yeah. Yeah, to work.

But I mean, it was the middle of the night that this kid came alive. You don't even kick with the kids. So anyways, he goes bad father go bad. Oh yeah. That is weird. He's like my one wish is that you're a real boy.

OK, get the fuck out of my head. But you want to go to real school. Yeah. So so then he doesn't even walk him to school. He doesn't even walk the kid to school. This is a child. This is a wooden child.

First day he's a real boy.

You know, he's not he isn't real. You're right. That's the whole plot of the movie. Right. He wants to be what it is. He's not. Actually real, because you still wouldn't he still go to school there? Is this like gnarly fox comes and was like, oh shit, I'm going to sell this guy to slavery. Allegedly does sells him into like this marionette like puppeteer guy who's a psychopath, locks him in a cage. Jiminy Cricket gets them, they sneak out, then they get spoilers, then they get nineteen forty spoiler coming in.

Welcome to this is Disney movie.

Yet on the way home he gets kidnapped again and they go to some like island where it's like just kids are just bad kids are. They're playing much like a ninja turtle.

That's basically shredder's like drinking and like smoking and they're like seven years old. They're all like six, seven years old and they're just housing beers is what Shredder's layer was. Yeah, right.

Like and the Ninja Turtles wanted to be a real ninja, so it's kind of a reimagining of Pinocchio.

Hey, guys, movie idea for baby turtles.

Woodin Turtles are we are all having the same idea. So then after he gets out of that, he goes and lives underwater for a while, which is pretty weird, Maestro. And then he goes and goes back to Chipotles House. It's covered in cobwebs, torpedoes, no longer living there. And then there's a handwritten note where it says, Hey, Pinocchio, if you get back here, I'm stuck inside of a whale. A whale has eaten me just to let you know where I'm at.

How does that note get there?

Pretty weird hole in the story. So then he goes and it's like, I got to find Geppetto and then just back underwater with his water friends and they go inside of this whale and then they finally save him.

There we go. When he turns into a donkey and those kids start turning into dog.

Yeah, it is legit, bizarre and scary.

But these are I mean, I'm sure a lot of younger people that are that weren't around when we were youngsters, youngsters that weren't around in the 1940s like we were. Right. But I grew up on this seminal film of our childhood, like, this is an insane movie. And I'm telling you, smoke weed and watch it. It's it is a ride.

I watched it on an airplane like five months ago, like on my iPad or whatever.

And after the flight, this older gentleman comes up behind me pre covid you're under arrest, puts his hand on my shoulder. He goes, I just want to tell you, I'm so excited to see a young person like you watching a classic movie like that.

But yeah, I was like, Yeah. Oh, thank you. Patient Zero.

I know watching a movie like that, I was like, I wonder if, like, cancel culture is going to come for, like, Pinocchio, because there's, you know, come for Gone with the Wind.

Yeah, yeah. He's Gone with the Wind is like biting first but then I know, but now it's back.

They put it back and they just put a title at the beginning. They just add the context at the beginning which is sure.

Yeah. I'm all about that.

That's what Disney Plus did do I think all their old shit. They're putting titles. Yeah. But also what young kid who's impressionable is watching Gone with the Wind. Totally. They're like, you know what, they just spent all afternoon watching Tick Tock. And they're like, you know what I need I need to be gone. Ryan, I've actually never seen Gone With the Wind. And allegedly it's about slaves. I don't know. It's my favorite movie.

Nobody, but like, yes, they put a title card at the beginning of a streaming thing. But if you catch that shit on, like AMC midway through, then what might that what then?

Your brain is turned into mush. I mean, maybe we just update these Disney movies. Pinocchio becomes Parko Veto. Oh, right.

Now. Right. That that was important. Coverdale, we found the podcast here.

Have we done our job? I think I jump out the window.

Yeah. That at this point.

Oh, I like it though. Cool video. It's got a room window open. Corcovado how about put another fucking idea.

Oh the classics. See we're going to get so good at podcasting. It's the first. That's the thing. We're not firing on all cylinders quite yet.

Podcast Neoh They they say it takes thirty to forty podcast to get good. They do right. They take it say forty to get good. Yeah right. Isn't that the thing. Is that common. I bet you that's probably right. Forty apps to get good. I mean what is the ten thousand hours broadcast.

So that would be fourteen hours long.

Ten thousand podcasts. Yeah. And then we're going to be there. Yeah. But you're going to want to follow along for the ride. Hey you're going to see every episode. We're going to get better and better, going to get better at talking. We're going to talk real good.

I'm not going to say people video anymore. Oh no, no.

She keeps saying keep saying that's your thing. Now are you going to develop certain things first? First t shirt.

Yeah, probably now. Yeah. I mean, it's doubled down. Tripled down, baby. Let's go.

Like we're all going to have fun things that we lean into on the on the pod and yours is going to be saying stupid shit. That doesn't make sense.

You know the thing you remember how to pronounce in twenty minutes bro.

Fuck you. Papa John's Papa Dhiya, I can say covid to me. What is what is a puppet, you know, like a bowl of pizza. You guys watch TV after that, that delicious meal.

OK, what are you saying? Because you're not cancelled. You're just dumb. Right. But I'm saying dumb ideas are always bad. And what is the dumb idea that you're saying? Bad ideas? What's the Papa John's idea? You've never heard of a papa, dear. What is this? It's like a folded up pizza.

I want one so bad. I'll make you look delicious. I fell for it, even though I don't like to support the company because the dude's a psychopath. But the Perfidia spoke to me.

That dude looks like fucking Pinocchio grew up and is like I'm a real executive now. I'm going to eat pizza. He is fucking weird looking.

My buddy Zach, who's like you guys all know him, who's super deep in a pizza.

I wish I was pizzas Instagram handle and he does wish he was pizza follows Papa John and he always sends me videos of Papa John's saying the funniest shit.

It's just it's him going Papa John. And then he's like curling a holding a pizza and like curling away weight, I think. And he's like Papa John or Papa Pop.

He's like riding a polar bear. Yeah.

He's got that clock in his entryway. That's like animals. And it rotates like it's like striking. Yeah. In his description of it was completely wrong I guess he says John Oliver allegedly.

Oh yeah. Jérome Johnny. He gets everybody allegedly. Allegedly.

John's going after all of them. No stone unturned.

Let's for this podcast. Let's leave tons of stones unturned. Let's just kind of kick stones walk over a lot of them like that.

I saw this video the other day. That's it. We. That is so no need don't need to turn that stone. I'm gonna go and see how it just made the podcast flow. Yeah, it wasn't good.

This is our first we get really we got 40 more before we're good.

But it's still No. 39, 39 and a half more and then we're going to be higher. Are we already halfway done? I'm guessing so, yeah. Cast time goes by fast.

It really does happen. What else what else can we talk about? Worship and worship. I feel like Pinocchio was a really good subject.

Yeah, that was a winner. What about Dumbo? You guys like Dumbo? What's a fucking cool movie? The mom beats the shit out of some kids, goes to jail and then they're like, guess what? You're going to dress up like a clown, jump out of buildings down and have them watch Dumbo.

That's based on a real story. Allegedly.

I allegedly heard that all of Disney and Pixar and Marvel movies are based on real stories, allegedly like real human stories, allegedly.

That is allegedly awesome. Yeah, I love that. Allegedly. Here's a question, is it weird that all of our childhood man heroes have grown up to allegedly be pieces of shit?

Mm hmm. Every year, I would say only a few haven't had some sort of, like, weird scandal where not even weird scandal where they just are like screaming the N-word or doing something absolutely nuts.

That's a weird scandal. Yeah, yeah. I don't mean a weird. That's that weird. It's just insane.

Just proving to be pieces of shit. Yeah. You're like, damn man, I thought my dad sucked, but you're way worse.

Yeah. You were supposed to replace my shit dad. Yeah. That's what you should do.

It turns out my dad is. Yeah.

Dude, Arnold's really the only one. Well he like cheated on his wife with his maid and stuff. That's, that's a little and have a kid.

But then he allegedly he like glazed over it and was like, it's great. I love him.

Well he just started on well he just started making so many Instagram videos with him and little ponies and miniature ponies that are in his kitchen.

And you forgot all about the infidelity. And the one kid with the pony, Arnold, has an official Instagram.

Yes. Are you out of your fucking mind? I don't follow that. Oh, dude, he's got these. Toninho was this is crib's like in the Palisades and he's got ponies.

This is where the phrase pony up comes from. And so when you're in trouble, fucking pony up. He has what are they called?

Not miniature horses, but I think they are miniature horses right now. But there's more dwarf horses. I can you. I'm offended. Yeah. God damn. I walked out of the wharfies, so I'm offended by pushing the button cancelled. Yeah.

That's I thought was rather calm though. Miniature was fine.

There was no reason to stop the word miniature when describing what's the science in miniature, miniature, miniature.

But whatever. How are you not following him?

I didn't I would think that he does. I, I don't know. Well, he runs his account or does he. This is the thing. Does he have a team of people?

I think it's a little bit about that matter if you're following him or not, because otherwise I just will wait for his publicist to drop something I want on the inside story, which is how he's done.

He's operated like that. He's like, wait for the publicist. A publicity stunt did the publicity.

Blake is known for waiting for the publicist to come out the woodwork.

My Arnold being a piece of shit is subjective. That's kind of I don't think he's a piece of shit.

If you think fucking your made and having a kid is a problem, then you know, he's a piece of shit.

You know, allegedly some people feel that way.

Some people don't. You know, I'm just I'm not going to and we don't know what their relationship was like.

Maybe maybe allegedly there was tons of threesomes happening between the maid, the wife. Right. Maybe the animals are in there. They're watching.

I'm not sure my opinion from my own opinion from the outside. I don't like that. I don't like that. So he's kind of a piece of shit. OK, and that's from that's from the outside.

That's me knowing what I know, not sitting them down and saying, like, yeah. Were you cool with this? Like, did you guys have threesomes? Did you do this? There's there's a lot of nuance to this.

You were you were not right. Yes. So allegedly he's still a hero of mine. All right, good. You stuck with Kurt Russell.

Kurt, he's the he's he's golden, right? Yeah. He's the one who's still kind of like, hey, man, he's clean. I'm here. Yeah, I'm studying.

I mean, if you're not against his lack of commitment, put a ring on it already. Did he marry Goldie Hawn?

Not Spirit. Come on, man. So you're a traditionalist. You believe in. I am a Christian values.

You don't have sex till you're married. That is true. I forgot about the giant cross tattoo on your back. Huge.

It's huge and it's getting bigger. Oh, I'm adding to your budget and then just wraps around the budget.

I guess you starting to go down my leg. Yeah. Curls around your leg happened.

It's pretty sick. I love that. If you you're tattoo free though, right, Blake? I am. Tattoo. Would you ever get tattooed up?

I think I would, but I do think it's a dangerous thing to start getting slippery slope. You may.

Well, I think I think at our age now we're in our mid thirties. We can get now is the time that if you really wanted a tattoo, you could just get it.

Also, that's the age my mom got hers. And hers is like a weird I remember when your mom got the tattoo that was tight. You liked it. You I thought it was cool.

What is her dad wears her tight.

It's like a sun with like a dove on her like shoulder. We're getting we're getting her in.

And your dad got the same time. Yes. Yeah. They got like that's tight. That was love.

And you don't want to get that on your chest. I mean, maybe I should get my mom's tats on me.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's hard. They'll be so tired. I guess I'm waiting for the right moment. My mom passing away.

I've seen I've seen Blake shirtless. Yes. Many times. Oh yeah. You have a nice meaty chest. Thank you.

You're welcome to tattoo. Your body would look good tattooed I.

Like, skinnier people look better when they're tattooed because not better when they're tattooed, but tattoos look better on them than like a person like me, like I could get really fat, like I could just, like, take a left and and really just become and the skin's just drooping.

And I've got like big old titties. And now the tattoos are like underneath the lips and you don't fully see the tattoos and it's all kind of folded up on each other. That won't happen to you.

You don't like those like old bikers that just have like the undertreatment stretchy tan like the Votto dude, I don't think 250 pounds. I don't think that looks that good.

Looks that good.

I think Blake's taught they aren't taught seriously. Blake's going to stay.

This taught I think Blake is never, ever going to become thin stock. He's chair. He's a thin man, Drew. He's always been thin.

I've never seen him get a little chubby and soft. So a little bit back in high school. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He had one picture for a year.

Was probably my awkward stage when I got more lecture. Right.

That's your body was just gearing up for that growth spurt that I know you had. How well do you know. Oh I know you hate it. This is when you find out that I've always wanted to fuck Blake and I've been kind of odd unless, you know, literally this is known in Hollywood, bro.

Well, you just analyzed my body. That's OK. I come down with that.

That's all right. Well, I'm fine to do that right now. Analyze my bod. I got to start rate my body. Yeah, talk to him. Talk to you.

Remember that website actually, like hot or not hot or not, was the fucking funniest thing dude I loved. Weren't you? You had a backup, right, Kyle?

What do you mean you had a picture on. Oh of course. Yeah, yeah. I loved it.

I like lived by it. I would check it every fucking three hours and be like, dude, seven point eight in high school.

We've got a home of mine on there. And he was at like a nine percent or something. We have to bring that back up.

You guys know, hot or not, it was like you put a picture of yourself in the community and this was like 2002 or 2003, like early Internet.

It was. Yeah, yeah. Early Internet.

Do you think anybody popped off that you think anybody who was like the hottest person, like got a call from a manager and then was on.

Oh, fresh air.

I bet you Hollywood. When's the last time I talked about that's how the shay came to be. Yeah. He got 98 degrees.

Yeah. They're like they're putting it Lou Pearlman was putting together. I need more. I want more.

I would be willing to bet thousands of dollars that there's a maximum Hottentot not issue. Best of hot or not.

What are you willing to bet. I'm willing to bet thousands of dollars. Thousands of dollars. Put a number on it.

Let's see. Maybe one of us wants to take this action. Yeah, let's do that. There's a hot or not maxim issue.

So you're betting thousands that what are you doing as your money manager? Oh, no, no. I feel like the to intersect so perfectly. Yeah, yeah. But you should have been the editor. I don't think they were doing that. That's why nobody fucking reads it.

All right. Maybe not thousands, but they should have. Well, she guys, you talked Blake off this bet that I was about to take. You could have made money. I was about to make some covid.

I was ready to watch that money exchange. Yeah, I was ready.

I was in I was I came in hot. I was ready to put the money on the table. Oh, you want to talk me off the ledge?

Dude, we used to make 10000 dollar bets all the time. Yeah, we each like each other hundreds of thousands.

We used to bet ten thousand dollars on a game of poker and we bowling. Yeah, there's a lot. But this was before we had ten thousand dollars. Right. It was funny. Money is funny. Monopoly money.

No. Now you will not find any money. The opposition is nonexistent. Yeah.

What was the website or the app that came out when we were on work.

All ugly meter app. Come on, let's not bring this one up. I was listening to Howard Stern on the way in and it was the funniest shit I'd ever heard because everyone was getting rated and just tearing each other apart.

And I downloaded it, came into the office and allegedly made everything.

Yeah. Which I guess you can't do. But I didn't make everyone do it.

But I was like, well, people were indeed they should be fired and we would shame you. You would be ashamed and there would be a character named after you murder.

I remember when you made me do it. Oh my God, I, I'm pretty positive that I got like a seven percent out of 100 or something like that. Yeah.

It was a real did something. No I sure I go a little longer. It's not going to make a step back and let me get another one. It was one like that better or maybe even worse. Yeah. It was like something about my face did not agree with this app and it hurt my ego. It's oximetry thing.

Well when you're coming out wrong with my symmetry, when when you're coming off and wait on hot, not only to be knocked to a seven percent on the ugly apple.

Yeah. Yeah. Something's not adding. You know, that big ego, I'm just saying that it fucking stung. That was a solid 10, 12 years after Hottentot dropped. Yeah, the body and face does change.

Kyle gets way uglier. When you got there at that time, you really had like several strokes.

You were a handsome high schooler. I was.

I was really I was there for those. Let's post the pic right now. Yeah. The bleated. You see this at home. Are you looking at this?

I think this is just audio. Is that what a podcast was? Homecoming royalty? Yes. Could you be more specific, please?

I was homecoming royalty, but I lost to Paul Ryan, the quarterback of the football team.

So what does that make you? A loser?

Royalty. Yeah, no royalty. I wasn't royalty.

I was pretty rigid on that. I wasn't trying to.

You were set up at all. I've seen Carol before. I know that. Yeah. Oh, man.

Yeah, he did win back the legs, but he was the carry over a high school for sure. So what were you guys like in high school?

Because we all didn't know each other in high school. We met right after high school.

Well, when we were 18 years old, we Kyle and I go to high school. Yeah. Uniquely enough.

We've known each other since we were 10. So it's like eight. Eight. How old were we? I, I want to remember what. Oh no.

You guys knew each other since elementary school. Yes. That Wow. You know, you know someone for 20 years you're still find out new stuff. Know.

And I knew that. So you guys were adamant that I did. I didn't know that I've been to your high school.

You have allegedly. Allegedly. Yeah.

You don't know. How were you guys in high school? Please explain. Kyle was super popular.

I was pretty popular. I'd say right now. It was homecoming royalty in my senior year. So I definitely worked my way up the ranks.

So, yeah, I was the opposite.

I was homecoming royalty, freshman, sophomore in junior year and then my senior year there, like, we get it. You're done. I don't understand you anymore.

What does it as a freshman every grade at least is outworked in our high school, every grade elected, however, many four or five people to be their royalty for their class.

But royalty from no. And then you go to homecoming and you stand there like an asshole and then it's just homecoming. We're talking about your homecoming royalty. And I was it my senior year? OK, I did. And I do want to get into your guys lives.

But what's what's your prom king or homecoming king? I frankly, I don't know.

I don't regret anything at all. I don't know.

Homecoming King is at the beginning of the year and proms at the end. You actually didn't have a senior prom?

We had a senior ball, so that would have been called a ball king. I don't owe the ball. And I was the ball king. So that's what they call it. That's what they called me.

They called me at least because I would go round and get the ball that. So you guys you guys, a freshman class sophomore, junior senior, all different courts.

Yeah.

And then and then they give you like like I won my sophomore year and it wasn't even like I wasn't even a prince or anything.

They gave me a sash. They give me a sash that said a ten attendant.

Yeah. Your bathroom attendant. Yeah.

You put your hand over a ten. I would say it's it's right here.

I guess I'm a ten year shell.

You want to put those hands on bond. So remember how fun that was when you just go to the dance and just one girl was just wilin out, just shake in the butt cheeks.

Just a real good dance. Yeah, that doesn't happen anymore. When I went to dances, I pretty much just remember break dancing in the back. Yeah. I don't know. I have no. You were on that break dancer. Absolutely.

Especially in middle school. I was like, yeah, whatever. Let's go try and do some flares. Yeah. Yeah.

Can you imagine the smell of those dances now. Oh my gosh. Like when you're there and you're drunk and you're just like sweaty and all your hair's wet and shit and you're just running around drink and punch, it was a lot of it's got a Yeah.

Sober for me.

And yes, I firmly did it wrong as well. I think, I think we were quite sober dancing out our demon. I had my senior year.

No, no, wait. When did you start drinking for dances. How old were you when you started getting drunk before dances. Fourteen there.

Whoa, my boy. Boy, I really for sure. Oh my best years party animal.

Well I was like but junior senior year I used to let it slip a little but not going and wasted because I was always so worried that I was going to have to talk to some teacher and they're going to be like, wait a sec.

That's part of the whole game. I never I was like I was like, not worth it. You guys are oldies, right? Like, you're the ones who are breaking the seal. I had older brothers who were like, here, child.

Yeah, we go to school, sober young man. I used to smoke weed in school.

Allegedly. There we go. I never would do that either. I was also very, very afraid that that was a crazy thing I did. But it was there was a dark room. I was a photographer, yearbook photographer. And so it was an awesome game because you've got to go in this room that no teacher could go in for like an hour a day and just be like, I'm developing film, do not open the door.

And then me and my buddy would smoke weed in there and then blow it through the vent that would go into the girl's bathroom.

And we would stuff the like the laundry machine.

Oh, the flu. The yeah. The weed flew off with the toilet paper roll and then you put the dryer sheets in there and blow it through. And I remember one day the teachers knocking on the door, knocking on the door and we just finished and she comes supposin in and she's like, oh my God, what does that smell? Guys do have something to say to me. And we're like, yeah, I do. I think these girls in that bathroom have a real addiction to marijuana and it's disgusting.

I'm getting I can't I die in here.

And she believed that trustworthy, trustworthy have the old one over on that. Nice.

Yeah. Super nice woman who was just trying to do her job. You know, you think about it like half of half the time.

It just has to be that there they don't want to deal with it. They know you're not like a total degenerate or you're not like hurting someone. So they're just like, all right, OK.

Yeah. Oh yeah. I'm sure it was the girls in the bathroom over here.

Teachers are heroes. They really are man paid so much more allegedly. Yeah.

That's that's you're not willing to stand on that planet. Yeah, no, I think we could say that. Is that that's OK. Yes, we can.

Teachers need to be paid way more. Their jobs are insanely tough. Yeah. Man, they're raising us.

They're teaching us that I wouldn't be able to sit here and say Percovich Doe if it wasn't for you first in my life.

Right. You've earned that right. How are your kids going to do with school? Blake has a daughter and Durrs has two sons that are going to school in that kind of thing. How is that going to be with this next school year where they're not going?

Very serious question. This is important.

I'm not going there's no school. Yeah. I have been wondering, what grade do you think would be the worst to have, like, be living covid through like what what grade, what age would suck the most.

Yeah, because I feel like with any like young kid you can kind of still.

Teach them somewhat, but like, imagine being a high schooler where you have to be your own teacher or whatever. That's like all the kids that didn't get to walk this year or whatever. And it's like that has to be so strange. But they're already done.

Remember a thing called senior year? Surely you've already you probably if you're going to college, you've already been looked at your college and all that stuff admitted. But if you were a junior and let's say you were looking at colleges but you hadn't been accepted anywhere, now it's just out the window. If you were like an athlete who's looking at scholarships, what the fuck does that look like? Now, if you were going to go to Yale for acting or something or NYU and like now that's not going to happen.

What are you doing? Yeah, totally on pause.

Or like you were set up to be the lead of the year for the musical Nokia. Yeah. No, no, no. There's going to be OK to you. Yeah. What's going to happen? There's not even going to be any community theater for those.

You know, I wonder if there's going to be a generation of kids that are just just dumb shit, you know what I mean?

Like, if they go like if this thing lasts like two years and then they're just like, yeah, I never got around to math.

And you're like, OK. Yeah, like, bye, good bye. Senior year. They're just like, you know what we did.

I never learned how to count really. So it just kind of spiraled from there. I guess.

Like if I was in eighth grade and I was making the switch to freshman year, I'd be like kind of pumped that I get to wait another year.

You're you're a hell of buff now showing up as a freshman. Right. You get a chance to prepare like this would be the buff freshman. I wonder how many yolked freshmen do. So we're going to roll in their eighth grade year. It was just kind of a wash.

And they come in freshman year, the puberty hit because they got they had to hold a year. They're so lucky. Yeah, they're so lucky.

And they'll be prime, by the way, just use this time going into college. They'll have they'll be a year older. Their bodies will be so much more physically.

God, I wish I wish I would have started training.

Did you guys get those great those nipple things when you were going through puberty? What's that? No, no, no. Like your nipples hurt. Yeah, no, I didn't.

But I remember you're not that hard ball under your nipple. Yeah, I know what you're talking about. I haven't thought about him in years, dude. I remember those so that's why I like people would be like oh this one here. They would grab it. Yes.

Yeah. So that's life. Yes.

Maybe I'm still waiting for my growth spurt because I've never heard it. Really.

You never had that. I grab my nipples right now I am squeezing her nails. All of us are tough and they're pretty soft at the end.

Now imagine a marble in the tip and that's what it used to be.

Marble in the tip. Yeah. Yeah. I specifically remember like marble and no, my God, he also like you didn't get Pitt here till you were like I was a late bloomer.

I didn't get paid until college. No way. College. Yeah. That's why you got this sophomore year actor. Yeah, well he's my son.

I just remember grabbing either like Kyle or my friend Teddy's nipples and found them flipping out, like, do that hurt really bad or so. And it was like, whoa, I thought I thought this was something we did, man.

I loved I loved how quiet you got when you're like I just remember grabbing Kyle's.

Ah, it was so touching, you know, pinching like it was like amongst friends. We pinched nipple.

I just remember grabbing Kyle allegedly.

They said, I don't know. Kyle, how did you feel when I did that?

No, I haven't thought about it in forever and yet hurts so fucking bad. And what are those things? What was it I know. What is that?

That was a good way that you could see your body being like, are these going to be titties? And then your other part of your body is like, no, no, we're holding off. And it's like we were just trying to be. So it's like that's scientific. Like the test taught.

Those are estrogen lines. So those could be I thought that that's what it is. And then the testosterone at that point is like, nah, yeah, exactly.

So. Right.

It forms a marble that could also be wild. Amilcar Yeah. Well this is. No, no, no. Are you kidding. Almost exactly what it is. Yeah. That's important.

It is. That is important. What do you what a bizarre time. Do you remember how. Oh my God.

Pinocchio is really a story of puberty when you think about it.

I remember being so my dick was hard all the time. Was yours. Wasn't still in my mind. I still wasn't tied down was mine. My dick does not work the same way.

He's crying, working the same problem. It doesn't work. It used to be a problem and now it's, it's how it's a problem.

Are you damned if you're hard. You're damned if you're not soft.

That's just that's so it was definitely like there was the moment where you're like, well, there you go. Sweatpants can't do that anymore.

Yeah. Or if you got called up on the chalkboard you have like a boner in sweat pants and you have to just tuck your butt back and do a little dance.

I sure. Sure I've had. But have you.

I have I have in my freshman year of high school, I stood up and I had to tell. Oh, yeah. And and then, like one of my buddies called me out, I was like, you just had to tuck his dick up and I honestly snapped. I was like, I have a boner. What do you. We all got them.

And I, like, kind of went off. And after that, it was a this is a note for if you're in eighth grade, ninth grade and you're getting a lot of boners, call your Bonar's out.

Get ahead of it. Well, this is a get ahead of me because. Yes, then as soon as I did that, all the kids were like, this guy is funny. He's talking about Bonar's. I'm like, so then I wouldn't shut up about my boner any time I got a boner. I was an announcement to make. So let me get the cans on top of it. You're going to recommend it. Children across America. You know what I'm saying?

Allegedly take my advice word for word, allegedly. If you have an erection, good job.

Or you have let's say you're a girl and you've got giant nipples or something. You got like a really hard giant nipples. And it's and there's just it's poking out or your dick is always hard or whatever it is. Get in front of it. If you're if you're like a fat kid, you have some fat jokes in the back pocket. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

You want to stick with a kid with huge nipples and Costello saying if you have a thing because I was a crippled kid in high school or in middle school, if you have a thing that is that people are going to make fun of you about, what would you say to kids calling it out?

And then I think we're good.

No, not not just crippled kids, because little kids, kids with boners all the time, kids with hard nipples.

It's it's important that we as a people are able to talk about this stuff and not just make fun of each other for, you know what I mean. Like, what Adam did was diffuse the situation. And it's like, why isn't that kid talking about boners that, you know, the dinner table with his family? So it's not a thing. It shouldn't be a thing.

Can we at least admit that the real hero here is the friend in the classroom who audibly said, you just talk to your boner to the rest of the class.

Without him, we wouldn't learned a damn thing.

Yeah, well, for sure. I mean, you know, you need you need bullies, you need help or else you won't know how to deal with that.

So there should be one bully for high school and you run for it just like you run for prom king, that people get voted and you go, he gets the bully. He's the funniest bully. What he says is usually true, that you are ugly, you are a nerd, and he gets a ride on the back of everyone's wheelchair.

Yeah. All right. High school, they would they would always take my wheelchair and push that shit. I'm like, this isn't your job, man.

If you had if you had an electric wheelchair at my high school, you were somebody ride to class. That was just the deal you made with the environment.

I never got the I think my parents didn't have enough money to to spring for the electric one. They were like, yeah, well, someone's pushing you.

But that's why you're so good at doing the balancing, too, though. I'm good on crutches. I'm good. I'm good in a wheelchair. Yeah.

Did you think that you weren't going to be able to have boners after your accident or was it Redbone or where those of you that don't know, I had like a bad accident when I was a kid.

I was hit by a cement truck. I couldn't walk for almost two years. And I was mostly worried about my boner.

And that's way it was. I was worried about it, but I was like, too young to, like, really?

No, I was like going into sixth grade. So that's right. One boners are starting to peak your interest in what's going on down here. I do remember this is a gnarly story.

My one of the first times I ejaculated. Hmm. And I was taking a bath because I couldn't stand in the shower. My mom had to pick me up out of a wheelchair and placed me in a bathtub.

And I'm listening. I'm taking off.

Meanwhile, I jerked off like this, jerked off like his shoes.

Oh, when two fingers. That was the move, by the way, when you get to a full circle and then you go and you go to hands.

I never got there and never got there. But it was jerking off in the bathtub, too.

He came in the bathtub. Good. You know, good. Or just as soon as I came, I looked down and saw something floating in the bathtub and it was my toe.

I thought he had come to my world. Oh, my toe fell off. My baby tore my left foot. You guys know how I have a little nub? Yeah. Yeah. My baby told my left foot was like charred. And they're like this will probably just fall off at some point.

And it fell off and I started screaming and I'm naked just with just water in the bathtub.

And my mom comes running in and she's like, oh my God, you're told I'm a get out of here, get out.

It is not safe for you. So when you jizan the water, are you kind of like scooting around to like DOGIT and like the. And then I told the flows of the water, it's like coming after you and then like, yeah, it was like the first time.

So like I done it multiple times before that were nothing.

Yes. This is what we're going to talk about. Is the pre able to come jerk off the air. Yeah. What the fuck man.

That was weird. Hey so if any kids are. Listen, listen, you guys are pre coming in.

You're not there's no just coming out getting. Part of it was screaming from the rafters at your local middle school, and if you're just tuning in now, this is important. You know, it's very important. This is important.

You guys have any take backs or apologies that we want to get out of the way here?

Because we've been talking about a lot of stuff and I feel like we maybe stepped on a few toes. And I want to keep our friendship at a certain level with each other because I do.

I love you guys. I don't think you guys are idiots and assholes a lot of times, but I do really love you guys.

So any take backs or apologies and maybe compliments and or some comments? Yeah. If you want to throw just compliments, kickbacks, apology.

Well, I'd like to compliment you all for being open and sharing. That was really, really awesome. And I'd like a legend. I'd like to take back the fact that I said that. I think it will take 30 to 40 episodes for the show to be good. Now, I think it's going to be closer to like 10 to 15. Wow.

Okay, that's a big upgrade. Yeah. I would like to compliment on your optimism. Thank you. But I would like to take back the fact that I was a little mean earlier to Kyle about his his agriculture.

And I just think maybe I'm jealous because I can't do that.

And I know that you can't see my face. I'm behind a mask being covered safe right now. But I am serious.

I appreciate that. Thank you. And also, I'd like to apologize to you others for jumping down your throat about the right to tweet thing. Sure. Of course, that was that was out of control and it was rage sneaking up. And I'm in currently in therapy dealing with that, so I don't want to take it back.

Oh, but I do want to apologize for it.

OK, fair enough that I was a jerk when it, it was, it was so and I got so hot. Yeah. Really. Well watch restitute. It's very good.

I'd like to apologize not not to you guys. I was forthright with all my feelings. OK, did the three of you. Interesting.

But to those elementary school kids and middle school kids that I was, I was saying, hey, get out in front of it. Yeah. I don't want to take that back and I don't want to apologize for that, but I guess I want to reiterate it.

Compliment, compliment. I would like to compliment on my great advice and start a foundation and they should have called and Ders can go on with this for me.

One bully per school. Get in front of it.

In front of it. I feel that.

Hey guys, what a fun first podcast. And I just want to say I had a blast and what everything we said this was important.

Allegedly important. Very important. It was very important.

A lot of stuff that we said and, you know, other podcast you listen to. And I might be about the news and it might be dealing with, you know, political strife and people talking about how people and marched. We didn't do any of that, OK?

I mean, I marched several times. I just want to get out there and is my family OK? Made sure that they understood that happening on the world.

I'm having those those tough, tough conversations with my family. That's what I'm doing.

But this show is about telling me you marched into your parents house and up in March and on the phone with my dad, I'm doing an individual family tree march where I've been marching, been marching a lot on the phone with my father.

Oh, boy. All right, guys, good first podcast.

Let's end on a high note. Yeah. Yeah.