The assassination of President John F. Kennedy is the greatest murder mystery in American history. That's Rob Reiner. Rob called me, Soledad O'Brien, and asked me what I knew about this crime. We'll ask who had the motive to assassinate a sitting President. Then we'll pull the curtain back on the cover up. The American people need to know the truth. Listen to Who Killed JFK on the iHeart Radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Hi, I'm Daniel Tosh, host of a new podcast called Tosh Show. I'll be interviewing people that I find interesting, so not celebrities and certainly not comedians. We'll be covering topics like religion, travel, sports, gambling, but mostly it will be about being a working mother. If you're looking for a podcast that will educate and inspire or one that will really make you think, this isn't the one for you. Listen to Tosh Show on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts.

On March 16th, 2000, two sheriff's deputies were shot in Atlanta. A Muslim leader and former black power activist was convicted. But the evidence was shaky and the whole truth didn't come out during the trial. My name is Mosie Secret. When I started investigating this case in my hometown, I uncovered a dark truth about America. From Tenderfoot TV, campside Media, and iHeart Podcasts, Radical is available now. Listen to the new podcast, Radical, for free on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Yeah. Welcome, everyone.

I'm Amy Roblox.

I'm TJ Holmes, and we ain't said that in a year.

It's been a hell of a year, too.

We have not introduced ourselves in any broadcast form in a year. It's weird.

No, we haven't spoken to many people.

In a year. Yeah, just each other. And here we are again.

It's been a tight circle.

I should have done this podcast with somebody else just to branch out a little bit. You're the only person I've talked to intimately in a year. You're so sweet.

You say the nicest things to me. No, I can't speak for you, but I am nervous. We've been doing this for a long time, almost three decades, and I can't remember the last time I was nervous in front of a microphone, but I.

Am today. Why are you nervous today?

Because we haven't spoken. We haven't said anything. And other people have had our story. They've told our narrative. And I shouldn't say our, they've told a narrative. It isn't our narrative. And this is the first time that we actually get to say what happened and where we are today.

What do you mean what happened? You have something on your mind, sweetness. No, to your point, how many years you've been in this business?

Twenty-seven. I've got what, 23, 24. And in the past, so you for 27 years, me for 23 have not gone probably more than two weeks without being in broadcast, without in some way, form or fashion, being on television, broadcasting in some way. And we haven't done it for a year. And today is the first time.

In a year. And today is actually a special day.

You want to go with that?

Well, it's almost apropos that we would have this podcast air on December fifth. Because December fifth, last year, exactly one year ago today, was the day we were told not to come into work. Yeah.

We never got a follow-up call to come back. That's true.

In fact, yeah, it.

Was the opposite. And this wasn't planned. It's strange, but what a hell of a coincidence though. It was December fifth. We got a call that sealed our fate, and it's pretty much assured that we wouldn't be going back on the air at ABC. We can get into that a little more in just a little bit. But we're here. Look, there's a lot been said about us. And for those, there might be some who are familiar with us a little bit, maybe a lot, maybe not at all. But I guess the best way to sum us up, Amy and TJ, is that we are the folks who lost the jobs we love because we love each other. That is bottom line. That is why we are here now. This is why it's been a hell of... Look, you never know. There are a lot of people listening. Wherever you are right now, whether maybe you're running on the west side highway right now. Maybe you're at home taking care of whatever, maybe on a drive, whatever you might be doing. But for us, this journey has... A lot of you understand that life, love, marriage, relationships can be messy, and usually are.

So I think, how did you put it? You wanted to thank people who suspended judgment, I think, is what you said.

Well, I think we want to thank everybody who's listening right now. Any one of you out there who decided to say, Hey, let me hear what they have to say. We just want to say thank you because we haven't had that opportunity yet. So, yes, we're hoping and hopeful that many of you have suspended judgment that you haven't believed everything you've read or seen or heard. We've even been shocked and surprised at what's been said and what's been written. But we want to thank you for sticking around and giving us a chance to tell our side of the story. And we have had the incredible pleasure of running into people, sometimes daily, who have said the kindest things to us over this past year. And it might have just been a moment or a passing thought, but it meant the world to us in those moments where we had people come up to us and say, We support you. We love you. When are you coming back on the air? And it was a boost. We had some specific, really.

Fun ones. One of them was just a few minutes ago. We happen to be talking to you right now from actually the hotel. We are sitting on a couch here with several people in the room staring at us, hearing the story. But on our way, this moment to this room to sit down for this podcast, the door is open to the elevator. We step in and a woman says, Itry to know who you are. This just happened, and she starts going in, I am such a fan of you guys. I am rooting for you. Congratulations. You look... And as nervous as we are and have been all day in getting this together, that woman just put us at ease. It is just... It was the last thing that happened to us before we walked in here to do this. But the couple at Bill's Bar and Burgl in downtown New York, they came up to us at the bar and said, Guys, you should hear our story. The flight attendant, who was so sweet to us, said, Guys, I fell in love at work as well. The truck driver, downtown brother rolled his window down.

Big, tough guy. Hey, I'm a fan of love. Congratulations. Those things have been incredible. I mean, the woman at Barnes and.

Noble- Barnes and Noble, she actually got tearful. Yeah. And she just told us she missed us and she loved us. And to keep on loving each other, there was a woman on the escalator who just said, I am so happy that you all are still together and that you all love each other. I think in the end, all of us are always rooting for love. And it doesn't always happen when you want it to happen, where you want it to happen. And it's undeniable when it's real. And it's something you have to navigate. And it's not easy. And anyone who's lived enough life, I think if they're really honest with themselves, can attest to the fact that relationships are hard, they're messy, they're not perfect. But we have fought for love, and I can say that I've never been happier. I am with my best friend. I'm not going to get cheesy, I promise. Although that was cheesy, so I apologize. I started, then. Sorry.

Go ahead, more cheese.

Yes, let's Belvita this. We have gone through, I think it's fair to say, a year of hell. But we have had each other through it all and had a lot of support from our family, from a tight circle of friends. And we have hopefully gotten through the really tough stuff. And we have more work to do as all relationships will require. But it has been the most beautiful relationship I've ever had in my life.

We say it has been a hell of a year. And look, it's odd to say it when people ask. It was even my mom was on the phone. I had her on speaker. This was several months ago, and she asked me how I was doing. I said, I'm the healthiest and happiest I've ever been in my life. And she said, Really?

Have you seen this magazine or this.

Template, really? I'm not possible. You're doing good. But we are. And look, we're going to get into some stuff here and what happened over the past year. But the bottom line is, and a lot of people are curious, and I know some stuff is still being written, and I know we still get cheesed by photographers, so I know stuff is out there. But bottom line, we have not said this, I'm in love with this woman, and she's in love with me. We are planning a life together. So anywhere you read anything that says, A source close to the couple says, or a friend of the couple says, is a 100 % fabrication, because there is no one who knows what has been going on between the two of us and the conversations we've been having. So I'm not accusing some publication of lying. Maybe they depended on a source who wasn't really a source, but there is no one who can say they know what has been happening with us the past year, except for us. And here we go.

Yes, we have spent a lot of time together, you and I. Have we not, over these past, almost, well, 12 months now.

I guess we talked about, we were getting to the why this anniversary is so odd. But this really goes back to, I guess, really November 30th is the day. November 30th, 2022 was the day that we were, and this is very important, we were outed. We were outed. We were outed by - We were not caught. By a publication that outed us. And so to be clear, we were outed as being in a relationship, but everyone else thought we were being outed as adulterers, being outed as cheating on our spouses. And it wasn't the case because the odd thing is that the day those pictures were taken and the day that article was released that outed us, we had both at that point been were in divorce proceedings.

Yes, we had attorneys, mediators. We were in the middle of divorces. I believe the first day the first picture was taken, unbeknownst to us, was November 10th. And my ex had already moved out of the house three months earlier. You pointed out pretty interestingly, anyone who thinks we were still in our marriages when those pictures were taken, well, the pictures actually tell the truth, don't they?

They confirm. I don't know why we didn't put this together. The pictures that, quote-unquote, out at us, the day I started being followed, the first day, the first pictures that were taken were me coming out of my apartment, my home in New York. That home is where I reside by myself, and I have been residing by myself since last summer. So the picture that shows me that they're saying these two are cheating, the picture actually confirms that I was out of my marriage because I'm coming out of a building, which is not where I shared a home with my ex-wife. Now, so it's funny to put it that way and to say it that way and to see it that way, but that's actually true. But November 30th was a rough day. You happened to be off work.

That day. I was actually giving a speech in Washington, D. C, a breast cancer speech. It was a little bit of a later breast cancer awareness month speech, a little bit later in November. I was at the podium. I always have a phone up there just in case for whatever reason, but it was buzzing non-stop. Everyone who knew me knew I was giving a speech, so I just thought it was strange. And it wouldn't stop buzzing. And it was-Sorry about that. It was TJ. It was also, I think, our executive producer. It was ABCPR. It was my daughters. It was a number of people. I had no idea that this article had been released and pictures had been released while I'm standing in front of about 500 people. And I believe by the time I finished the speech and was able to look at my phone, I think it's fair to say I was probably the last person to know what had just been released. And you also were in a very uncomfortable position when your phone started ringing.

Well, it rang in between segments because I was still in studio typing the show. And in between segments, I got a call from a PR person asking and saying this article was about to be released, and I didn't have time to put a thought together. I didn't have time to do any PR. I didn't have time to handle any crisis at the time because I literally had to get back on set and continue typing the show.

Were you doing deals and steals or something? I think I might have. I think that's what you told me. Oh, my God. So you're going on and doing the show. You're continuing with your mind, racing what is happening. We got no warning. I think maybe there was a five-minute warning. I gave them five, 10 minutes. There was no opportunity for comment. There was no opportunity to refute what they were saying. It was just going to be released no matter what. And it was. And then we had a lot of work to do that day to try and figure out what the next best step was. I don't know if we made the next best step, but the first thing we did when I flew back and we got together, we were putting together a press release acknowledging that we were in a relationship. Because it was one of those things where everyone in my tight circle knew I was getting divorced. I took my ring off early August. It was very clear to anyone who knew me that I was in the middle of a divorce. Tj is a much more private person than me and just chose to keep that to himself.

But it was hard because anyone who was a viewer, anyone outside of a very small circle, didn't know that either one of us were getting divorced. So that was one of the challenges we had in the beginning. So we were trying to clear everything up, and we actually had a press release ready to go.

Yeah, well, the audience, and look, our viewers, fans. I know there are plenty of people who followed us for a long time. And for that, we were trying to make the best call we could, but we shouldn't have allowed, I can say that in hindsight, but for folks to find out about our relationship before they found out about our divorces, if people would have heard earlier, Okay, they're out of their relationship, now they're dating, maybe an eyebrow would have been raised or something, but it wouldn't have become what it became. And look, at that point, my daughter, she's 10, I was still trying to get her adjusted to her new reality of her parents not being together. I've been working on that for the past three, four months. So I didn't want to spring on her that early that, Oh, yeah, by the way, that Amy Robach, who you've known since you were one, has been a part of the... Well, I'm dating her now. I didn't want to do that to her at the time. But I hadn't even told my mom about the divorce, so why the hell am I thinking about telling an executive at the network about it?

So that's just where our heads were. And hindsight, sure, and maybe we screwed up. But in the immediate crisis of it all, and I have it in my phone still, saved a draft from November 30th, the day this happened, our statements, our draft statements that have never been released that said, You made a statement about where you were in your marriage. I made a statement about my divorce is proceeding. Those statements were never released.

You don't know what to do. I don't think anyone can prepare themselves to be in this type of a situation. And like you, I also felt awful that my family found out about us through a tabloid, which was difficult for the exact same reasons that you mentioned. It's enough to go through a divorce privately for a family to have to restructure and regroup and figure out what this new normal is to then on top of all of that, spring a new relationship on them. So we thought we were protecting our children and our families, and we thought we had time, and we thought we had a right to privacy. And maybe that was foolish and silly. I always used to say that doing what we did, we had a beautiful amount of fame. It was just enough to be fun. And it wasn't too much to be where you felt like you were being followed everywhere. So I think I was naive to think that I just didn't think anybody would care that much. I didn't think that it would be that big of a deal. I didn't think I needed to put on Instagram.

My husband and I are uncoupling or consciously uncoupling, and we're going to do the best we can for our families. And we ask for your privacy. I know a lot of celebrities do that. I just didn't think that it mattered that much, that that was the level we were at. In hindsight, yes, that should have happened. That would have made things better and easier. But we had no reason to believe we were being followed. We were being photographed, and there was an agenda. We just had no idea that that was even happening. And we were friends. We've been friends for, at that point, eight years. So it wasn't unusual for us to go out, hang out at O'Donoghues, next door to Times Square Studios, which is, I think, where the first pictures were taken. It's a place we had gone to for eight years and hung out and had a beer and talked about work. So it was not unusual for us to be out and about. We didn't think it would raise eyebrows.

The assassination of President John F. Kennedy is the greatest murder mystery in American history. That's Rob Reiner. Rob called me, Soledad O'Brien, and asked me what I knew about this crime. I know 60 years later, new leads are still emerging. To me, an award-winning journalist, that's the making of an incredible story. On this podcast, you're going to hear it told by one of America's greatest storytellers. Well, ask who had the motive to assassinate a sitting president.

My dad thought screwed us at the Bay of Pigs, and then he screwed us after the Cuban missile crisis.

We'll reveal why Lee Harvey Oswalt isn't who they said he was.

I was under the impression that Lee was.

Being trained for a specific operation. Then we'll pull the curtain back on the cover up. The American people need to know the truth. Listen to Who Killed JFK on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Hi, I'm Daniel Tosh, host of a new podcast called Tosh Show, brought to you by iHeart Podcasts. Why am I getting into the podcast game now? Well, it seemed like the best way to let my family know what I'm up to instead of visiting or being part of their incessant group text. I'll be interviewing people that I find interesting, so not celebrities and certainly not comedians. I'll be interviewing my plumber, my stylist, my wife's gynecologist. We'll be covering topics like religion, travel, sports, gambling, but mostly it will be about being a working mother. If you're looking for a podcast that will educate and inspire or one that will really make you think, this isn't the one for you. But it will be entertaining to a very select few because you don't make it your mid 40s with IBS without having a story or two to tell. Join me as I take my place among podcast royalty like Joel Olstein and Lance Bass. Those are words I hope I'd never have to say. Listen to Toshow on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts.

On March 16th, 2000, two sheriff's deputies were shot in Atlanta. Jamil Al-Amin, a Muslim leader and former black power activist, was convicted. But the evidence was shaky and the whole truth didn't come out during the trial. My name is Mosie Secret. When I started investigating this case in my hometown, I uncovered a dark truth about America. He said to me, You don't need to take care of them for not doing something to pain you or something like that. I said, No, what are you talking about? But I had no idea who he had become. That's how he approached you? You know what he meant when he said that? Yeah, I'm thinking murder in a minute. I think that's what he was thinking too. From Tenderfoot TV, Camside Media, and iHeart Podcasts, Radical is available now. Listen to the new podcast, Radical, for free on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. It's odd that we have been... Look, a lot of people know. I used to call his brother, sister, almost. Pease in the pot and all this stuff to the point where when people would accuse us, I shouldn't say, accused.

When they would make any joke about what's going on with you two, we would almost go, Eew, it's like my sister.

That is actually true.

But even now I catch you every once in a while. You'll say, Honey, or something. I'm like, This is so weird. Because we were friends for so long. Truly, genuinely, friends for a long, long time. And then look, I've gone through some troubles, personal trouble over the past several years that you helped me out of, that you helped pull me out of. Whether it was the running, whether it was meditation, whether it was books to read. Of course, we got closer during that time because I was in bad shape in a lot of ways. That's for another episode. But you helped me out of that. So we did over the past couple of years, started getting closer and spending more time. And you've been my best friend through all that. But still didn't see this coming.

We would lean on each other when we were having tough times. When we started anchoring our show together, we got even closer. And we were traveling together. We were going everywhere together, and we shared where we were in our lives together. And it's just this bond that was just truly and completely friendship. I mean, we have been there have been rumors about us since the moment we met. People kept saying, Oh, those two, what are they really up to? And it was all false. We genuinely were just.

Good friends. Right, to the point. It freaked me out because I was still fairly new at ABC, but there was some rumor going around, and it reached such a level, I freaked out and went to management myself and said, Hey, I don't know if you heard, but it ain't happening. I guess this time we should have gone and said, Hey, maybe you haven't heard, but we want you to know what's happening. But we get still to that point. I hadn't told my mama, Why are you thinking about an ABC executive about... Again, maybe a mistake in hindsight, but-.

We had a plan, though, because one-Yeah. Once we became a couple and we were in a relationship, and I want to point out that happened after we left our marriages. We had a plan to get our divorces finalized, to get them agreed upon and signed and filed. We thought the timeline was going to be around end of the year. So we thought in January, we're going to go and walk in and explain to management that we are a couple and how should we figure this out. We had actually even talked about doing it earlier. Remember? Right before the pictures came out, we thought, should we tell them what's going on? And we thought, let's just get these divorces cleaned up, and then let's do it. But we had every intention of doing it. And we didn't believe, and I don't think we still do believe, we were doing anything technically wrong. Technically.

I mean, it's just look, we failed at being good crisis managers. We failed at understanding some level of celebrity that neither one of us thought we had. I'm not saying we do, but in that world, affiliated with the show we were affiliated, that's just a sexy freaking story. I just don't think we thought about it in that way that anybody would give a damn what we were doing. And look, we were, I think, threatened, is the right way to put this. Days before the first pictures were taken of us, was second week of November. We were directly threatened. I don't want to get into where it came from, but something was being demanded of us. And it was, If you don't do this, then we are going to make it bad for you. It was directly said to us. At that time, we didn't see any urgency to it and weren't thinking along these lines. But two days after that, sure enough, there was somebody, unbeknownst to me, parked outside my home, following me to work starting at 4:00 AM, and following us out of town for hours, following us all around. I don't know how you prepare for something like that, but it was an awful...

That November 30th, and then going into that weekend. I didn't remember that. A lot of people will look and say, Look, Rich, you're famous, and you don't feel sorry for you guys. Not asking for that. I think you were right to say, Suspend judgment. But a lot of people can relate to just the human state of having the experience we were having. And your parents came to town what?

On the -So I was in DC on the 30th, when it hit, my parents were midair coming to New York from Atlanta to come up to my dad's work. They were having a Christmas party. And I remember thinking, Oh, my God. I have my parents coming to town, and they were in the air when this dropped. So I'm trying to text them while they're on the plane to say, Please don't believe everything you're reading. Please let me talk to you when you land. We need to talk. I was actually so afraid of my parents and what they were going to think and what they were going to experience. I knew we were going to be splashed all over the New York papers, walking by newsstands. It was just going to be one of those moments where I didn't want my parents in the city with all of this happening. And yet it turned out to be one of the most amazing things to have happened because they were there. They were supporting me. They asked me what they could do. They were my lifeline in that moment because my whole world fell apart. It's so hard to think about just going through a divorce publicly, but now to have all of these accusations and all of these pictures and trying to explain what was actually happening versus what people said was happening, it was awful.

And they were amazing. They got me through those first few days. But TJ and I were apart. I mean, you were at your apartment. I was at my apartment because I was moving. To your point, my ex had moved out months before, but I already had a move scheduled for that week to move to my new apartment with my 16-year-old daughter. And so boxes are everywhere. I mean, it couldn't have been more chaotic and more crazy. And so I was doing my thing. Tj, you were at your house.

And for me, it was different because I was hold up alone. Yeah, you were. I was in an apartment by myself that... Look, you know this because, right? Sabine helped me set the apartment up, right?

I helped a little too.

You helped a lot. No, you did. I'm kidding. No, I wouldn't have known what color dish towels to buy. I've not been for you, baby. But I am in my apartment, and Sabine, when everything hits, I didn't want her around me because we were being pursued, being chaste. So there was essentially... You could go home, but you literally were moving. So you couldn't just close the door and hide. You had to manage a move. I went home and was alone all of that time. November 30th, again, that was the day this all came out, but that was a Wednesday. And we went to work on that Thursday and Friday, December first and second. But my only interaction with human beings was going to the studio. We kept the doors closed, came out, did the show, and bounced. And then I was home.

Alone. And it was interesting because when we got the call, we were obviously managing work and what they were trying to figure out what to do, how to handle us. We had conversations, and at that time, everyone agreed we hadn't violated company policy. And so it was agreed upon by everyone that we should just come back to work. In fact, I believe I was asked, are you comfortable coming back to work? And I said, that's what I want to do. I want to come back to work. I want normalcy. I want to be able to hold my head up high and say, yes, I'm in this relationship, but wewe were doing everything the way we were supposed to be doing it. So it was agreed upon. So coming back into work, it was a little nerve-wrecking, but it actually felt good. I felt like we had support from our coworkers for the most part. People were coming in and giving us hugs and telling us it was going to be okay and that this too shall pass. And they were happy for us. And we were feeling okay about it all. And then as the news cycle goes, everyone wants in on it.

And so people start digging and they start reporting other things and things start spiraling out of control. And we had to get a crisis management team to try and help us field all these phone calls. We were talking to reporters. We were trying to give them information so that they weren't printing misinformation. But that didn't work out perfectly well. We got to a point on Thursday where you were in a pretty dark spot, pretty.

Dark space. Look, I don't know what was going on. Look, you let me read it this morning. You still have it. I do. But it was Thursday, so it was the next day. I didn't even realize how I was talking to you. But you were receiving messages that were from me in the past tense. I didn't realize I was sending them. I was sending them to you. I didn't know how I was sounding. I'm not sure where my head was at that time, but that was Thursday. I didn't realize. You reminded me that this morning. That it was the very next day. Well, you had to do a welfare check, I guess is.

The best way to put it. That's a very, very understated way of putting it. At 3:45 PM that afternoon, you sent me a text basically saying, I'm sorry. You were the love of my life. I'm so sorry this has happened. You just kept saying you were sorry, but you were using past tense in the entire text. I texted you back and I said, You're scaring me. Please tell me you're okay. No response. I'm calling you. I call. He doesn't answer. I FaceTime him. He doesn't answer his FaceTime. And now I'm getting calls from work. Producer is trying to get in touch with him. He's not answering anybody. I start to panic. And my parents were there with me. I didn't want to betray him by reading a text that he sent to me to my parents, but I was so afraid that he had done something. And I read it out loud to my mom and dad, and I started to cry. And my mom looked at me and she was like, You have to go down there right now. You need to go check. And my dad said, I'm coming with you. And so my dad and I, it was two hours later, after he sent this text, we jumped into an Uber.

I was pretty hysterical and my dad was holding my hand. We got to his building and I knew the doorkan. I said, I need to get up. He's like, I'm coming with you. I had a key, but he said, I'm coming with you because this was Robert and he loves you. Oh, yeah. And he came up with us, the three of us, and I was shaking. I remember going down the hall, opening the door, and my dad came in with me, and I saw you and you were just splayed out on your bed. I ran to you. I said, TJ, and you didn't move. I remember it was the most awful thing, having to touch your body to see if you were warm. I was so afraid. You were just incoherent. You don't really even remember me coming, do you?

Kind of.

I said, Baby, tell me you're okay. Tell me you're okay. And you were just making no sense. But I knew you were alive and I knew you were going to be okay. I stayed with you for a little bit and my dad stayed with me. He told me, he was like, I was so afraid of what you were going to find.

Yeah, that was the night. But the day was essentially me getting off work at 11:00 AM, and I immediately started pounding vodka. I didn't stop for several hours. Then I took, who knows how many weed edibles. That's how I ended up in the state I was in.

Yeah, and that combination was terrifying. You weren't moving. And my God, I will never forget that night.

This is something we need to, and we'll talk about this down the road. After the night we just had and everything that happened, we show up at work and try to put on some of their grave face going through the absolute worst hell, either one of us had ever experienced.

We're not asking for anything but just open minds and open hearts. I think it's another reminder. We did this for a living. We interviewed people who were at their worst moments or had had the most unimaginable things happen to them. And you can try to commiserate and you can try to imagine what it would be like, especially if you're then in the spotlight and you've got cameras in your face and you've got journalists yelling things at you. You can't imagine what it feels like until the tables are turned and we experienced it. I'm hoping that that's just going to make us more compassionate and empathetic for anyone who's been in whatever situation you find yourself in, whether you're the cause of it or it happens to you, whatever it is, we're all human beings here. I think it was just a brutal reminder of that. I have described this, and I am not being dramatic. I think a lot of people might know. I know, I do tend to be. But I think a lot of people know that I'm a breast cancer survivor, and I just celebrated 10 years. I used to always say that 2013 was the worst year of my life, the hardest year of my life.

But I look back now and it's interesting when you go through cancer. Yes, you're afraid that you're going to die, but you're fighting to live. And you've got all these people around you supporting you and cheering you on and saying, You've got this. You feel this collective hug from people who are lifting you up when you're scared and you're going through all of these treatments. But this year, I wanted to die. There were days where I wanted to die. That was something I had never experienced before in my life where I just didn't want to get up. I didn't want to see what new headline was going to be out there. And that has been such an eye-opening experience. And then to feel like, Who is still behind me? Who supports me? Will I work again? Will I be ever trusted again? Will people believe what really happened versus what people have written happened? And those were all things that we had to go through deal with. I will say that I just felt extremely lucky that we had each other.

And folks are wondering why. I guess we could have tried to clear this up, if you will, at some point earlier. But some folks told us early on, Well, if you don't get ahead of it, you're done. And so that train left the station. There was nothing we could do to get people to stop saying what they were saying. We saw things that were 100 % wrong. They were fabrications, they were lies, they were mistakes sometimes. But we did not for the past year. And a lot of this had to do with us trying to get our own homes in order. Look, a lot of damage was done. It's not even about the marriages, right? That's tough enough to go through a divorce. But we were trying to get our kids up and get our kids to understand why we didn't tell everybody what was going on with us ahead of time. That work continues, but that is in a much better place than it was. But that took a lot of work. And the I'm sorrys and the apologies, the first ones went to Sabine and went to your daughters for just not telling them.

Ahead of time. I'm still saying I'm sorry, because it's one thing for us to deal with the press and to deal with the headlines and honestly, the paparazzi that have been... They've become as much a part of our lives as anything. They're there all the time. So when I'm with my children, when I'm with my daughters, they're there and their pictures are being taken. Imagine, I just try to put myself in their shoes. It's their family. They're so young, they don't have the tools or the life experience to even really be able to put it into perspective. And it's just been a really hard, hard journey that will continue. We're all in therapy. All of us are.

But I'm better equipped. We used to talk about this as well. And what, several years back, what can I go back to? 17, 18, 19, 20? Those years, I was a mess. I was an absolute mess. But going through what I went through at the time and putting good practices in place made me better equipped to deal with this. If I was in the shape I was in back then when this happened, God knows what would have come out of this. But I think it's very difficult to sit here now and imagine being in a better place. It's hard to imagine because we did... Now, this is fair to say those are dream jobs. Let's not. Yeah. It's not just a matter of... I mean, it was the dream job in that we were doing some hard news, some of the lighter stuff, inspirational, aspirational, as you say, and you're sitting on the set with your best freaking friend, and your show was airing every day on a network in the afternoon. This was the dream job. We lost those dream jobs. How in the hell can I sit here and a year later say I'm in a better place than I was?

That seems impossible, but it's.

The truth. It's true. If you think about it, that was one of the concerns. I mean, it was on the list. I've been doing this for almost three decades now, and we haven't just been dabbling in it. We have been working around the clock, crazy weeks, such an investment of time. But because we loved our jobs, we had genuine passion for it. And we're so grateful for where we got in our careers and what we had been able to accomplish. And we're excited about what was next. I was really nervous about how we were going to handle the two of us not working.

It turns out it's not so bad. We actually.

Found a way to think, I can do things. I can go places. I can spend time with people and on things. We've watched a lot of television. I will say that.

What haven't we watched? Any news? We don't really watch news anymore.

That's true. It's been a.

Total reset. We read.

Our news. A total reset. Ialways was a little concerned that my job defined me in a lot of ways. Well, when it was gone, you have to figure it out.

And we have had a-You have a new definition now. You want me to tell you what it is?

Yeah, what is it?

Uh-uh. Well, if you read the papers.

I'm like, Oh, yeah. No, I don't like that. But I think the opportunity to actually work on yourself as a human has been amazing. And we've been able to work on our relationship. We have been in the trenches together, actually, and we're stronger and better than I could have.

Ever imagined. See, people can't see us right now. It's so sweet. You have your hand on my leg.

Comforting me as we sit here. If they could see the way you're looking at me right now.

They would just melt. Oh, my God. Don't be creepy.

Hi, I'm Daniel Tosh, host of a new podcast called Tosh Show, brought to you by iHeart Podcast. Why am I getting to the podcast game now? Well, seemed like the best way to let my family know what I'm up to instead of visiting or being part of their incessant group text. I'll be interviewing people that I find interesting, so not celebrities and certainly not comedians. I'll be interviewing my plumber, my stylist, my wife's gynecologist. We'll be covering topics like religion, travel, sports, gambling, but mostly it will be about being a working mother. If you're looking for a podcast that will educate and inspire or one that will really make you think, this isn't the one for you. But it will be entertaining to a very select few because you don't make it to your mid 40s with IBS without having a story or two to tell. Join me as I take my place among podcast royalty like Joel Olstein and Lance Bass. Those are words I hope I'd never have to say. Listen to Toshow on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts.

The assassination of President John F. Kennedy is the greatest murder mystery in American history. That's Rob Reiner. Rob called me, Soledad O'Brien, and asked me what I knew about this crime. I know 60 years later, new leads are still emerging. To me, an award-winning journalist, that's the making of an incredible story. On this podcast, you're going to hear it told by one of America's greatest storytellers. We'll ask who had the motive to assassinate a sitting president.

My dad thought JFK screwed us at the Bay of Pigs, and then he screwed us after the Cuban missile crisis.

We'll reveal why Lee Harvey Oswalt isn't who they said he was.

I was under the impression that Lee was.

Being trained for a specific operation. Then we'll pull the curtain back on the cover up. The American people need to know the truth. Listen to Who Killed JFK on the iHeart Radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. On March 16th, 2000, two sheriff's deputies were shot in Atlanta. Jamil Al-Amin, a Muslim leader and former black power activist, was convicted. But the evidence was shaky and the whole truth didn't come out during the trial. My name is Mosheed Secret. When I started investigating this case in my hometown, I uncovered a dark truth about America. He said to me, You want me to take care of them for not doing something to pain you or something like that. I said, No, what are you talking about? But I had no idea. I don't know who he had become. That's how he approached you? You know what he meant when he said that? Yeah, I'm thinking murder in a minute. I think that's what he was thinking too. From Tenderfoot TV, Camside Media, and iHeart Podcasts, Radical is available now. Listen to the new podcast, Radical, for free on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

This podcast, yes, our project here, this podcast is dropping this first episode. It's launching on December fifth, 2023, so on this day. So on December fifth, 2022, it was a Monday morning. What had happened that whole weekend, we worked our asses off. All that previous weekend, talking to so many reporters, talking to so many folks on background who were like, We wanted to do an interview. We weren't going to do that. But they wanted to understand or try to get more details about what was happening. And some outlets were deciding what they were going to do moving forward. It was nonstop that weekend. Once we explained to certain larger mainstream, I guess you could say, traditional media outlets our story. But there were several mainstream outlets, major outlets, more traditional outlets, not taveloids and whatnot who were calling and were asking questions. And once we explain to them, like we just explained here on this podcast, what was going on, where we were in our divorces, and they dropped it. They decided we are not doing the story because it's not a story. Two people who are out of their marriages are dating now. Okay, we're moving on.

And they did not write a story. So we go through Saturday and Sunday, all of this. It's crisis managers on the phone, PR people non-stop, still not seeing each other. We couldn't reconnect yet. I'm still hold up in that apartment by myself doing all this. So we got to Monday and thought, wow, we have put this thing to some dead, to some rest, and we're going to be able to go back in to work and move forward.

That's all we wanted to do. We just wanted to be able to do what we love. Hopefully, the story had run through enough cycles. That's what we were being told. And it was wrapping up. They dug up everything they thought they could try to throw at us, and it was going to die out and peter out. Then it was around 6:00 a. M. On Monday morning. We were both getting ready to go into work. I was excited to go into work to put this behind us. We each got a phone call from our boss saying that they had made the decision, and they made it again, a point to say we hadn't violated any company policy, but because we had become a distraction that they thought it would be best if they temporarily took us off the air to let things die down, quiet down. I remember I said, Oh, please, no. Please, if you do this, I mean, I was begging, if you do this, this is going to create a whole new round of articles. And now the media, more of the trusted media, I would say, that passed on doing the story.

Now this is going to be a story if you take us off the air. Please don't do this. And I did ask. I said, if you're going to make an announcement to the rest of our colleagues, can you please at least acknowledge that we have not violated company policy? And that was the compromise that I reached. But I was sick to my stomach because we knew what was coming once that announcement was made.

Well, it's one thing to say, I mean, for anybody. It's one thing to say that those two are dating now. Look, if this had gone the other way, meaning if we'd have put out statements about divorces and then people found out we were dating, they would raise some eyebrows and go, Okay, that's still an interesting topic, if you will, that somebody might talk about. But doing it this way, it's a much more... The story became mainstream when they're able to say, Two morning shows stars suspended. That's now a major story. And given the brand we were attached to, that's a big, big deal. And we knew that was going to be a big deal as soon as they said we weren't coming. And that was the day, that was the morning. We knew we would not be going back to that network. We knew that phone call sealed it because you can't come back from that. And so that was a very, very difficult morning, difficult day. And it did start a whole new round of stuff that we were trying to get to quiet down. To a certain degree, when we talked about names for this podcast, one of them we were going to go with was scandaless, because this was a scandal that wasn't.

This was not what you've been sold to a lot of people. Look, we take full responsibility. We've explained some of the decisions we made that led to us sitting here right now. Maybe we should have put out a statement earlier. Maybe we shouldall these things, this is absolutely, this is on us. But we're sorry we're only now being able to talk to some of you and tell you. And you said it earlier, and you correct it when people say our side of the story. It's not our side. There's just the story. And it's been wrong from day one.

It has been. And it is cathartic and incredible to be able to start to tell it and to live it. We have not... Gosh, we have not felt comfortable holding our heads up high, walking down the street. At least we didn't initially. But we've started to now, and this we're only hoping will create a new way forward where we can at least say, Here's what actually happened. Here's what we wish we would have done better and differently. I wish that we would have been more transparent. I wish that I would have included my daughters more into what was happening in my life. Those are all things I certainly regret and I've learned from. I do think that it's all about communication. We were in the communication business, and still what happened happened. But I'm so hopeful that there is a new path forward. We have so many people because as awful as it was, we had so many people lifting us up and guiding us.

You did? I didn't. Who were your people? You should have passed some of your people to me. You didn't hear I was in an apartment by myself trying to measure out edibles. Didn't go well. Oh, my goodness. No, I know what you're saying. People say you find out who your friends are in these times. I don't know. It's been something about it that I didn't feel worse about people. There are people who we hadn't talked to in weeks, in months, in six months, in a year, in years that were calling and texting me every single day when this went down. Every day. Then there were people that I talked to and saw every single day that I ain't heard from since.

Exactly. You know who your friends are, and you definitely find out who your friends aren't in these types of moments.

But now who were your people? Who are you saying that lifted you up?

Are we naming names? I think so, yeah. This is positive for you. Yeah, this is all positive. I would say one of the people who just started and wouldn't stop texting me even when I didn't respond, Sarah Haynes, she was an absolute pleasure. She said, I'm going to keep texting you. I'm going to keep checking in on you no.

Matter what. They're probably going to fire her after.

This series. I know. That's why I was afraid. I'm like, I think it's positive, but maybe it won't be positive for her. You also worry about, I don't know, being connected to us may somehow bring you down. So I don't want to necessarily do that. But she was incredible. She and I have been friends for 15 years. We go all the way back to NBC. Honestly, someone who still works at that network to keep checking in, to keep calling, to actually be seen in public with me, that is a statement. That is something that does show incredible support. Who else? I'm curious. You put me on the spot here. Well, my family. My mom is one of nine. My dad is one of six. I have a lot of aunts and uncles. Some of them are closer in age to me than they are to even my parents because of the big families. When my family showed up, my aunts, my uncles, my cousins, they were texting me saying we love you. I remember my Aunt Anne, she's only six years older than me, so she's like my big sister. Annie, I call her. Actually, my little girl, I call Annie because of her.

But she sent me a text and this really got me. She said, We know who you are, and we love you. Because you start feeling like everyone else is saying you're something that you're not, and you can't deny it. You can't say, Nah-uh, I'm not like that. And she just sent me that text, and I remember that meant the world to me. I don't even want to leave out all my other aunts and uncles. But I still am getting texts like, We love you. They will tell me about people, especially who had my last name, someone came into work and said, Tell your niece that we love her and we love TJ, and we're with them and we support them. And they would just pass along those text or those moments of support from other people just to let me know there are more people out there who are supporting you than who are saying bad things about you. And I think we needed to hear that. I know I needed to hear that because you really try not to read the comments. And you were really good at not looking at the coverage. I was not.

I looked and I saw a lot of things I wished I hadn't. But I knew my daughters were seeing it, and I wanted to know. And when the paparazzi on the street is sticking his tongue out at me, and I just want to know what he's writing. It's a strange thing to be walking down the street and knowing every facial expression you have is being interpreted. Just to not be able to speak or to know it's being written for you instead of being said by you. It's everything to know that the people who know you, the people who love you say, we're not ever going to turn our.

Backs on you. I still don't look at that stuff. I know you don't. And we've got invites about it before because you tried to share something with me. I'm like, I do not want to hear anything because I got that advice early on from somebody who has been through more tabloid stuff than most people can ever imagine over a career in Hollywood. She very early on said, Don't you listen to or read anything. And followed up by saying, Do you hear me? Do not read or listen. And she has been through... It pales in comparison, you could probably argue, while she's gone through her whole career. But that was great advice. But Chuck, Matt, Montell, candy, Halle, Byron, Isiah, those are the... That's the group of folks, and maybe I can get into more who they are later. But those are the folks who carried me through the darkest days, which was in December of 2022.

I need to point out, Nikki and Dinesca, but those two were just my rocks in terms of even moving and helping me not have to deal with all of the logistical burdens in the middle of all of this huge storm and have been with me every step of the way. My glam squad at the studio just still check in on me every day and have been so supportive and so kind. And these are women who I was with every morning for almost a decade, and they're still with me in spirit, and they have meant the world to me, all of them.

Hi, I'm Daniel Tosh, host of a new podcast called Tosh Show. I'll be interviewing people that I find interesting. So not celebrities and certainly not comedians. We'll be covering topics like religion, travel, sports, gambling, but mostly it will be about being a working mother. If you're looking for a podcast that will educate and inspire or one that will really make you think, this isn't the one for you. Listen to Toss show on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts.

The assassination of President John F. Kennedy is the greatest murder mystery in American history. That's Rob Reiner. Rob called me, Soledad O'Brien, and asked me what I knew about this crime. We'll ask who had the motive to assassinate a sitting president. Then we'll pull the curtain back on the cover up. The American people need to know the truth. Listen to Who Killed JFK on the iHeart Radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. On March 16th, 2000, two sheriff's deputies were shot in Atlanta. A Muslim leader and former black power activist was convicted. But the evidence was shaky and the whole truth didn't come out during the trial. My name is Mosie Secret. When I started investigating this case in my hometown, I uncovered a dark truth about America. From Tenderfoot TV, campside Media, and iHeart Podcasts, Radical is available now. Listen to the new podcast, Radical, for free on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.