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All you want to do is sit in a cafe and quietly enjoy this podcast when you can, I have a tall Hemi Demi semi half caf goat McClarty. Oh, and can you serve in a macchiato class?
Oh, give me strength.
Cut the nonsense and keep it real. With Trebor, pick up a refreshing boost of Creber extra strong mints or a cherry trees of tree soft mints.
Hi. Hi. The weirdest way to start whenever I match that, we just talk like that, really. Hi. Hi, I'm Mary Schiavo. I'm writing about the podcast.
Whether they call us even just talking like that, that is what Tic-Tac is to me. And I know look, I know there's young people out there. I'm a 40 year old dad, OK?
And I didn't get Snapchat, so I got off and I said, this will be the last app I ever try out. And then there's ticktock and I'm not here to shame. Ticktock. I hate those people that get older and they just shame everything. They don't understand. I'm just here to say I don't get it and it scares me. And I'm worried. Tick-Tock is my Elvis and I'm a grandparent when Elvis was becoming famous and Tick-Tock is my Elvis.
Tick tock, tick tock is shaking its hips and too sexy of a way for you. Tick tock is too sexy for too sexy for you.
Whenever I picture people saying that Elvis was too sexy, I picture like that classic scene in a movie when like a parent and their kid are standing in front of a big display of TVs in a TV store and they see Elvis shaking his hips on TV. Yes.
And stop away at it. I have seen tick tock and the reason why I know what it is because I really got into Vyn.
I loved. Fine, see that.
So I'm curious then, like, OK, because like I will confess, I love to talk and I'm a thirty nine year old non dad who has made several Tic Tacs that. And the thing I like about tick tock is that you can make the videos using all of the tricks and then you can save them to private so they only China can have that information. Exactly.
And you have music. You can use popular music too, right? Yes.
I think there is an entire universe of hilarious people out there making such funny fun. Fucking great. Oh my God. Videos. Then there's some that people are like famous on Tic-Tac for just like doing a smile and they just always do a smile. And that's when I'm like, what are we becoming? We're that's enough.
And also I know why can't that be enough for me? Why can't I just smile and think people go, his teeth are OK.
He's a B minus, you know?
So I'm not saying I don't like to talk. I'm no, I understand. Ticktock. But everyone is on it.
Well, I also like part of my job is social media at work. So I do have to you know, I do have to know what the things are and what the trends are going to be. And we've always kind of jumped on whatever the next thing is and try to just figure it out. But then with this one, I was like, oh, I'm actually having a lot of fun making because you could, like, duplicate yourself.
So, yeah, quarantine. I was, you know, feeling kind of lonely. I needed to be on a dance floor. And there's a feature in there where you can clone yourself to make three or five of you. And so there was like a couple nights here in a row where I was.
That's what you did for my my birthday video. Yeah. Yeah. And I was just like, I'm totally delusional and I'm on a dance floor right now at six Ruthie's, which sounds totally egotistical, but I was like, oh my friends.
Sounds great. Maybe that's who you want to hang out with yourself. That's what quarantine is all about.
Liking my I for someone who does you NordicTrack is when someone showed it to him like so people just kind of dance and they all know the dance like no part of my brain was like they learned the dance. There's a dance. It's like, oh my friend.
And I was like, yeah. Does everyone know the dance? Now there's full on YouTube tutorials.
So here's why I already like Vine. Vine is six seconds and there's no rush.
I mean maybe people are rehearsing, but there's no look up a video learn tic tac is already too much work.
Yeah. Yeah. I for me I understand that again.
You know, I just, I didn't think Elvis should have been on TV. I just think we would move your hips like that. What are you saying.
Too sexy. Too sexy. It was way to take time. If there's anything to take away from those folks before we get to our guests is that Tick-Tock is just too sexy.
But our guest today is absolutely a fantastic person, an artist and love her. She is a the co-owner and artistic director of Dynasty Typewriter, which is a theater out here in Los Angeles that is absolutely incredible, supporting independent artists and independent shows and helping people figure out their stand up and elements of their craft. You've seen that theater in Adam Sandler's special on Netflix. She's also a mother to two children, and she hosted Nerdist Networks Pop Culture, podcast and ear.
Wolf's totally mommy.
Why wait any longer? Let's tick tock right into it. Start your tick tock, ladies and gentlemen. Give it up for Vanessa Reglan. Vanessa, how are you doing? Yeah, good question, it's the kind of question that gives one pause. I feel like we're fine and I have a 11 month old and a six year old and everybody's good. We're all good. My husband and I are both trying to work full time. So we're doing two hours on, two hours off and two kids.
So fucking psychopath. Yeah.
Someday they'll tend to each other. Yeah.
That scares me to kids.
God, I hope so many things I about you know, people say this and I have a question because actually with one kid being six and the other kid being 11 months old and that being that kind of a separation, do you think that's maybe easier than if your eldest was like three years old and this kid's a little he's able to help out, right?
And he we're very lucky to have a really nice six year old who is so pleasant and fun and loves his sister and also like talks more than any person I've never met. I mean, I've Googled like, are we OK?
Because there's an amount of talk that's happening. But she's kind of an audience to him. And I wasn't interested in having another kid until he turned four. And then I was like, yeah, it was a reality where that could be a thing. And then he turned five. And I was like, yes, this is a thing that I can get.
What do you think it was like the the starting to see like, oh, this is this. We can accommodate this.
We can actually facilitate this to these two separate lives and balance it.
Yeah. These humans. Right. And we care very much.
No, no, no. There's no yeah. I mean we have reason to believe.
But I think we both my husband, I wanted to be really present even though we're both working full time. And so it's a little different than that. We both had one stay at home parent growing up. And so already there's a little shift in, you know, making sure we're providing the right kind of support and we want to be super connected. And so I didn't feel like I truly didn't feel like we had the bandwidth to have lives and have another kid.
Like, I couldn't imagine having the emotional presence and the patience because. I want to be really patient as a parent, and I didn't I didn't think I had access to doing that for another person, but then at five, something really clicked in terms of like independence and and also like, oh, this person we have accidentally or somehow created another nurturing human that is like a part of our team now moving on to our team. So it's three against one is you.
You just said the most relatable thing that's ever been said so far in the history of this podcast.
And that is the sentence I wanted to be a patient.
Parent is family. You set goals and then you've got value.
Yeah, you set goals. And after the first quarter, just the first quarter, you're already like, OK, what were we thinking?
Patience is way out. This is unreasonable. Yeah.
So you're at your house growing up. You both came from one parent staying at home. Was that your mom or dad that was at the at the house regularly?
Yeah. We both had a very typical upbringing in terms of stay at home moms. Like really. Sure. Smart moms and like your whole life, you think like they want to stay home with me to be a mother. And then you become like a little older and you're like, oh, society.
Right then. Thank you for that. Yeah. Yeah.
And then you're like, oh, she doesn't actually love me, right? Yeah. It's like, stay here.
Hear me. Yeah I am. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Am I the problem. Yeah.
Yeah. So we were both our mother's problems. Yeah. And we had dads that had like very typical kind of jobs that were out of the house.
Do you think that kind of I'm going to say traditional because it's I don't know if traditional is the right word, because to me sometimes we say traditional. It's it's almost like you're saying the way it's supposed to be or the way that you wanted it to be traditional.
It doesn't feel like the right word. But I felt like I was problematic the way I was just saying, like we that I wanted to say, like we're like very lucky white people, you know what I mean?
All this all the stars aligned that gave our parents the opportunity for a father to make enough money to support a family and enough pressure. So it was a happy childhood for both of us. We both, like, really hit the jackpot in terms of really kind people. But, yeah, when you look back and when you're a grown up, that's like taking in the world and realizing, like, the million things you took for granted or didn't. Yeah, definitely a different lens to like the things like, oh, my mom would have been great at jobs, of course.
Yeah. Yeah. I always wonder too how it would affect their personalities because in that let's just say traditional agreeing that that's not the word. Yes, yes.
Yes I know, but meaning that we admit that that shouldn't be the word.
But in those kind of households and I feel like a lot of like boys becoming teenagers, becoming men like this idea in their minds, like, well, you you have to go to work and you have to provide for your family. It's almost this weird sense of pride that you're providing for your family, which I agree should kind of be on, and a part of everybody's kind of psyche to be like, I'm pridefully providing for this family. I'm helping.
But that particular dynamic, it's I always wonder if it like forces these kind of relationships with dads who are like, I just got off work, leave me alone, or these dads who are like, oh, I get to be away from my family for a whole day like that structure.
I think about it so much because I think there's dads in history that are like, I don't want to fuck and do like they probably were.
I just want to be at home with my kids and like, yeah, well, hang out is like I think becoming a parent for me. And you don't have to become a parent to go through these, you know, like mental waters. But for me, it was a big turning point of really re-examining my parents as humans. Right. And like my dad is really smart guy, tried a lot of business stuff, had a very typical job schedules.
But in his retirement years, they have moved to like more mountainous area and Virginia.
And my dad, who's always loved to play guitar and stuff like that, is now like doing open mics like and now he's got like five legs at or and I love that.
And like my mom like notational that is so traditional, Larry is having a renaissance and there's like women calling him a silver fox.
And it's getting my mom excited.
But I don't know, are they joining any sex clubs? Have they even considered that even the.
You can get into that culture. It's a long gray hair like this in this community.
But I think that, like I always had issues of understanding my own worth, and I think sons would go through this, too, like you want to emulate your dad does this or a woman does this. Like I I had a hard time feeling like my parents would ever be OK with me working, and especially like they support the arts, but they are not artists in the way that like they would ever risk things. Sure.
There's like there's a level of except now your dad is well now he's got bit by the bug. Yeah.
But like they saw it as, like Extra-Curricular. But it can't be your base kind of thing I think.
And I have like tried to articulate this. Yeah. I do think there's a lot of weird stuff around, like wanting to pursue art and wanting to pursue a living that is not traditional, that you kind of it rubs up against the texture of what you're growing up with and trying to like, oh, am I like am I like I can look at our life and wonder, is it as adult as like my sister's life, which is more traditional?
But then I think, well, I'm glad to live around so many different kinds of people and to be around challenging ideas and like it does look different. But I think that the character it's building is wonderful.
You know, I think I get what you mean because I think our blueprint vision idea of what an adult is supposed to be gets imprinted in our mind, in our youth. And it becomes a sort of repeated pattern of like in a TV show or in a movie or, you know, or going to your friend's house and you go, oh, this this dynamic of parents is kind of like my house. And like I think you think, oh, that must be what it is if you're an adult.
Which makes you think that now, while you're very much an adult, you still are like, oh, I'm I guess I'm not really into it because I'm still I have a job that I like and I have fun doing it.
And it's very impressive.
And I really care about the laundry, you know what I mean?
Like, yeah, I'm sure I'm like waiting for that day to come when I'm like down the house, but I just don't care. I just know it's a threshold.
I'm very happy to announce that all of our golden tickets have been released. If you were one of the lucky people who found a golden ticket, well, good luck to you. And be sure to listen to how it all goes down on a future episode.
Thank you all for playing. And thanks to State Farm for being a good neighbor and helping me realize my lifelong dream of becoming sort of a weird, badly aging redheaded Willy Wonka. You're a weird Willy Wonka. You're a wizard Wonka.
People thought the original Willy Wonka was weird enough yet. And I was like, nope, that guy could be even weirder.
And now I've done it with my golden ticket competition. Anyway, very happy they're all out there.
Good luck to you. Hey, everybody, if you're like me, your friends might be getting really sick of hearing you talk about your favorite video games. That's why we created a good game.
Nice try. The newest podcast from Team Coco. It's hosted by Twitch streamers Sonja Reid and yours truly. Aaron blared. Each week we kick out about gaming with people like Paine, Ben Schwartz, a lot of peers and a ton of other great guests. We talk about the games they love, the games they hate, and what we are offering up reviews and giveaways. Listen, wherever you get your podcasts and follow Team Coco podcasts on Instagram for weekly guest lineups.
I want to ask, like as a parent, you and your husband do.
Do you feel like where you're at, what you've learned, how you're doing it? Are you surprised with how your parenting. Are you doing things where you're like, I never thought I'd turn into that person who is kind of like that. I always thought I would be a cool dad who totally was on the level and just got it.
And I am such a lunatic.
My wife has to like she'll be like, you know, our daughter's for like what you're talking about makes no sense to her.
I'm like, I don't fucking know. I still like slowly giving up some of myself to meet my family in the middle.
I relate. You can't do 20 push ups or relax.
I it's so funny. I even did a parenting podcast for when my son was really young with Elizabeth Lahm and it was so fun. And I love I truly love being a parent to my kids. Like, I love our relationship and it brings me such joy. But in the same way I don't. Relate to being a parent, if that makes sense, like I don't have any identity foot in being a mom or and that's what I'm like, when does that happen?
Because I'm definitely the mother.
Like, well, we should get this check. We should check on this.
So I think that's one thing is I always I guess I thought I would be more like in an identity of a mother.
And I still feel very much like my my regular self. I feel like I am still as immature and immature. And I care about the same things. And I'm very like to frank with my son a lot. I think maybe in the way you are describing, like I, I get into these spirals and my husband has to be like, whoa, like like I don't want to mess anything up.
I remember when my son was two, he like was putting it seemed like he was going to put something in his butt or something like that, like he had a toy. And I was just like, oh no, no, no, we don't put things in our.
But unless well, you you know, life is so crazy and whatever I want you to know there's a little bit older.
And I just learned, John, just like then you could be like, it's OK to say we don't put things together, but like we could say that.
Yeah, but I but I get it. I know I get it when you're like, oh I don't want to I don't like. That's not the sound of to plant the wrong seeds. Exactly. Yeah. And then he's like 18.
He's like I don't know, I've always felt shame about wanting this because of my mother.
But yeah, I have a lot of those moments and I think that I didn't see that also like my mother always had a home cooked meal every night and it was very hard. Her life was super structured around caretaking and almost to a point of like not being as available to the family. Right. Because your life is like meeting the the the dinner's on the table. Like this is like a jewel. The house is like this. And I, I am so shocked.
My husband is not a cook. I like to cook, but I don't like to cook as a parent. Like I don't want to take I would so much rather play with my kid and have a whatever dinner, then spend an hour stressed out about dinner and have pressure around the food consumption and then the grown up. So like we're like, yeah, I think that's a sort of made up. It's made up. And that's sort of a surprise to me that like my husband cooks most nights and he doesn't like we don't care.
We eat, we like good food and we go to good restaurants. And every once in a while we do a really special meal that we cook. But in general, like our life, is a lot less structured than I probably would have imagined. I mean, we have structures and boundaries, but things like dinner and. Yeah, and general like things that I just associated with, like a normal life are way less like I want to make sure we're connecting with each other and and trying things as a family.
I'm really enjoying each other. And I think my parents are always like baffled about our eating habits.
Yes, they are always like if we come over, they're like, well, we were going. They go, everything is around food. And then like, but you don't eat like that.
You guys you guys are more Mediterraneans. Oh my God.
I relate to this accent. Feel good to hear that I was like home.
But they're doing it on like Monday. They're like, well we were thing about having this for lunch on Friday. It's Monday. And you're like, what the fuck are you talking about?
Yeah. And I think for my husband and I, we both realized, like, oh my God, we have so much trauma about like food planning. Like, yeah, yes.
I remember when we first got married and my husband ordered a Coke at a restaurant. I was like and it was my mother's noise because you're not supposed to order a soft drink at a restaurant because it's too expensive. Yeah.
Oh, my God. And then you had that knee jerk reaction of what she would do. Yeah.
Yeah. Those are regrets I don't need. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And I don't know. I wish that was your first date. He's like, oh my God, why did I ask out.
Oh my God. OK, all right. I'll get a nasty cola. It's 20 cents cheaper. Thank you.
I mean that traditional there's that word again with your mom.
Like the house should be this way at all.
I secretly deep down, I think I kind of want that role in my family where like every day it's like is the house order because I have an OCD where, like, I want to fix up each room and clean it every day. And then if someone's like and then you're going to have like food, I don't know if I'd be so good at the meals, but I fantasized that I would like really get online and really be like on Wednesday night.
They don't even fucking know what's coming because I'm going to do soup dumplings and they're going to go.
When did you learn soup dumplings? Oh, don't you worry about it.
That's how I picture all that will never be the case.
But deep down, I think that's my fantasy, which makes me think that maybe in my past life. That's who I was, I am aggressively clean. I was like a bad ass wife. I think I was just a bad one.
I don't know. I know.
I feel I don't do the decorations like my mom always did up the holiday decorations. We don't have room to store those. It feels so impractical.
I'm psycho about cleaning. I hate clutter. I organized Legos for therapy. It is the most beautiful two hours of the night. Everybody goes to bed and I am sorting pieces by coloring category. But like the thought of trying to store a pumpkin, garland is like, I can't. I couldn't possibly. Yeah, it's Halloween.
Enjoy it. Yeah, I'm a million percent with you. I think it all the time. We're slowly winding down here, but I love you're running a theater and you're raising two kids if you're anything like me. I constantly look at myself and I'm like, oh, I'm just a clown.
But then deep down, I'm like, well, no, this is actually a really hard job to do.
And in fact, my own insecurities, like I just had I've had people say to me, like in talking about our jobs, well, they'll go, well, I have a real job. And I'll always be like, I think I don't think you're aware that I also have a real job.
And I think you don't want to admit that maybe in the game of jobs I won the competition.
Yeah, I know. Which sounds so nice, but like all we do on our I mean, we're working so hard.
The quarantine, of course, not ideal for live venues.
I think it's the most ideal situation for a theater. We're thriving. It's like somehow we got we've we're doing OK and we are like, you know, zooming every day and, like, laughing so hard and making up stupid songs and then trying stuff. And I do think that parenting and also any kind of entrepreneurial or like artist hustle like you're so used to like the hustle and the unexpected and being like, well, I'll figure that out because I have.
Yes, right. That this is certainly not ideal. And I don't mean to minimize the really sad stuff that's happening. Sure. Of course.
But no, but I think because of that, you guys have found all those creative ways to keep all of your fan base and all your audience base engaged with what you guys are doing right now. And just because we can't be in the theater doesn't mean that people don't still want to hear your guys voices and the people that you're associated with that dynasties associated with. Yeah, and people are. So it is lovely to see how much people want to connect.
And I think I'm sure you guys are seeing that, too. But it's not ideal for a stand up to perform on Zimm. It is not ideal to be trying to figure out how do you live stream? How do you like this is the moment where it can feel very vain to be in the arts. Right. Because you're like, I'm supposed to tell jokes now. Yeah, well, it's going to tell jokes now. Yeah. For comics who bomb all the time, Zoome shows are so ideal.
Like if you've gotten on stage and you've never gotten a response, it's like oh my God, you would love Zoome because you won't hear and you'll never know.
And is what we saw the whole time.
But if you need to hear a laugh, if you need to know the audience is there, you're got to have a tough, tough time.
But having that typewriter, was that always like a a goal in the back of your mind that one day you were like, I want to be I want to have my own theater, I want to have my own my own space?
Like, I don't know. I think I had kind of limited dreams growing up. I didn't feel like that. I always loved writing and I studied writing and theater and college. And then after college, I went to Virginia Tech. I did a year towards a master's in poetry.
And then I guess I think opposite I didn't have a plan for what I'm saying.
So anyone who's getting their masters in poetry, they have a plan.
I have a business. And I think I always saw myself writing and working with people.
I always loved collaborating and doing bigger projects and performing. And then I kind of pursued acting because I had my degree in theater. But I'd never planned on being like a capital actor. I thought I would probably be a theater professor or something like that. And then I started meeting people in L.A. that were like normal people that were actors in my mind. It was like movie stars know.
You know. Yeah.
And you meet people that you're like, oh, these are kind of like people like me. And they're yeah. They're like funny and normal and and working and. Yes.
And like have families. Yeah. Yeah.
And are stupid and are not like obsessed with how they look or like the machine of it.
They're just like they want to get a job and it's the, it's the genre of actor that doesn't get really any attention as to like you know. No it no one elsewhere in the country or world is like interested in the actor. That's like, yeah, I'm just a normal person. I maybe act. But then I also just have these kids and I coach my kid's soccer team and we were like, I don't wanna hear that. I want to hear that you have paparazzi and you flick them off.
Yeah. Where's your say. Yeah, I want to know about your sex tape. Like, well I don't but I know how to run a four for one with my kid's soccer team. We do a flatback for defense.
I know what you mean. You don't really know that that genre of factor exists. Then when you realize they do, you're like, oh shit.
And you're like, oh, wait, that's the dream. Yeah, right. And I get paid for doing my art, but I can still go to restaurants.
Yeah. Yes. All right. Sounds good.
And at that point your parents became convinced that like I wanted to. Be famous, which genuinely, I have no interest in that, nor have I ever, but I do never want to have like what I consider to be a real job. And so and I started producing stuff together when he moved on from West Side. And I went on to do a lot of stuff at Groundlings. But the whole time we were producing stuff at the Improv and beyond and putting on shows and our our passion for that and the vision of like how how we would do things differently from a lot of the places we were working with sort of started to gel in terms of like, oh, maybe, maybe we could do that.
And yeah. So yeah, I don't think I ever would have predicted it.
But when I look at all the interests of the past and stuff like that, it's like, oh this is a good I feel really like we're heading towards it.
Yeah. It was like the dream job. I didn't even dream for myself.
Yeah. Yeah. Dynasty Typewriter is such a cool, interesting space. It's interesting because when you're there you can tell that it's like the type of theatre space that doesn't have like these rules or restrictions of like what you're supposed to be doing. And it doesn't have this. And to me, this is the the most important part of it is that it doesn't have this vibe to the performers of, hey, you're lucky we're letting you be here, because some places you have that.
We all know that. And when you're there, you're like, oh, God, this is a I don't feel fun. I don't have fun. I don't feel funny.
I'm like sort of a diarist for myself. Yeah. You're just like, oh, well, did I not say thank you and bowed down when you walked back here.
But that's where the dynasty typewriter's that. It's not. It's like this. Yeah. Come on and try it out. Whatever. Who cares how fun. It's not this.
Like if you fuck up, mind you, we'll find you outside of this theater. I love it. I love it.
Thank you so much. And and I don't know. Ruthie has been really against us.
I hate it.
Just it's cold. It's dark. It's depressing. That's the thing.
Because cohosts, I kind of have to support her. It's not good. It's not a good OK, it's awful. Ruthie ran a very successful smear campaign against us. And this is just another you got billboards.
We're arch enemy. Oh yeah. Right. Oh, my God. It's absolutely wonderful.
And I'm not I've never performed there but have produced shows there and worked there and like it's such a great place to collaborate and a place that you feel almost instantly like, oh am I a part, I'm a part of this troupe as well. You know, like even as a person stepping in just for one night, you know, we're obsessed with Ewers and we have cornered you more than once. Ruthe has been a very kind audience to Jamie and I being like, you know what we want to do, obsessed with you guys, I think.
OK, whatever. We'll start another podcast. I'm obsessed with the album and then I'll be the guest and. Yeah, right. Can I still be in it? Are you going to smear us? Yes, that's my goal. Okay. Vanessa, thank you so much. Thank you so much for joining the show me.
What a delight. I'm so grateful for you guys doing this and putting happy things. Yeah. And it's fun to admit your parent in Los Angeles.
I know kids are good ones.
Well, thank you so much. Thank you. Bye bye. And stop your tick tock. There we go. That was Vanessa Ragland, ladies and gentlemen. Is she not? Absolutely. Just fantastic. So fun to talk.
I just love her as a human being so, so much. And I actually miss giving her a big hug, so I can't wait to do that again.
And if you guys want to give her a digital hug, you can follow Vanessa on Twitter at Vanessa Ragland. As we said before, Vanessa Koans and is the artistic director of Dynasty Typewriter. So I don't know if you want to throw them some love, but they also have some representation in social media. Check them out because during quarantine, they're offering amazing classes, live stream shows with great comics and an ever growing souvenir shop. Check it out at Dynasty Typewriter Dotcom.
I got my dynasty darling pink sweatshirt. So it's one of my favorite pieces of merch that I've bought during this time and definitely to support those guys because they're amazing. That's our show.
And we'll be back next week with a brand new guest and dads. The podcast is produced by Gene Samples. Nick Leao and me, Ruthie Wyatt are executive producers, are Joanna Solotaroff, Adam Sachs' and Jeff Ross, engineering by Weilbach and Anya Jessep. Our theme song is by Strange Hotels with additional music by John Danek. Special thanks to Sean Doherty.
And as always, you guys can keep up with Dads the podcast by following us on Instagram at Team Coco podcast. Give us a review on Apple podcast. If you love the show and you know it, just give us a review. Even if you didn't love the show, just be brutally honest with us.
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It's a huge benefit to to everybody and we greatly appreciate it. So thanks for listening. And we will see you guys back here next week.