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What's up, giggler? Gary, fix your WiFi. Manifest that shit. We can't be managed.

I mean, the day just got away from me.

I was going to say what's up my Grammy gigglers because I'm losing track of the amount of award shows going on. Yeah. I have to say...

Oh, so wait. What was the G-word?

Grammy.

Like a grandma?

Like the Grammys.

Okay, sorry. I wasn't following. We're off to a bad start. Let's go again.

The Oscars? Yeah. Too much for me. I had three panic attacks.

Did you watch the Start to Finish? No. Okay.

I was going to the Tennis channel. The second they brought up five people to announce an award, I said, Oh, I'm out. Check, please.

See, I was jealous that you had watched all of the... What was the award show before?

I watched all of them.

All of the Grammys or something.

The Grammys were great.

I was like, You know what? Tonight's my night. I'm going to sit down and I'm going to watch all of the Oscars so that me and Hannah can talk about it tomorrow on Giggly Squad. Jimmy Kimmel comes out. He starts doing his monolog. Next thing I know, I'm waking up and they're announcing best picture. I'm like, Hold up the phone. I got myself too damn comfy on this couch.

Because we didn't text it all during it.

The Oscars still got My Nielsen TV rating. Tv was on the whole time, so I did my due diligence as a good civil servant. Yes. Slept through the entire thing.

That sounds so peaceful, though.

Yeah. So give me the best.

I was going back and forth. Jimmy Kimmel, honestly, I feel like he's been doing it for so long. He was like, What's up, guys? I'm back. You're smoking a cigarette. He's like, Yeah, it's been a long time. You guys are fucking rich and annoying. Yeah. I think he was good. It was fine.

Yeah, I thought it was fine.

They had the John Cina moment was very funny when he walked out naked.

Okay. Oh, interesting that you described it as funny. Hot take here. I thought it was so weird.

You know what? You're so fucking right about that. I apologize to the academy. That was It was weird, and I was trying to pretend I didn't think it was weird.

Here's the other thing. I'm deep on conspiracy TikTok. Like, deep, deep, deep. I can't even get out of it. I'm trying to like, reroute my algorithm.

You're like, Amish TikTok, Amish TikTok.

I kept getting TikToks of people being like, I think it's weird that John cena did that because his fan base are young kids. Yes. So that's weird.

Also, it's weird. If it was a woman, that would be so I'm so inappropriate.

Yeah.

And then the tension was weird. And then Jimmy just kept making gay jokes the whole time, like how he wanted to have sex with Ryan Gosling, John cena.

For whatever reason, the Oscars last night were giving me eerie vibes. It was all very eerie.

Yeah. I was like, What's going on? The theater was just big and haunted.

Yeah, I was just like, I feel like everyone's off tonight.

But let's start off with the fashion because you saw the fashion.

I actually liked a lot of peoples.

Oh, because I thought you weren't No, I actually posted- You were just in bad mood in the very beginning.

Well, I fell asleep. My mood was asleep. I, in fact, missed the moment of the show where I could have gone on my Instagram and been like, I love this, I hate this, but I slept through it.

I wake up this morning, I say, Oh, what did Paige think about the fashion? You just posted a ton of photos with no commentary. I said, I get it.

I was counting sheep.

You said, Choose your own adventure.

What do you think I think about it? I want my Instagram to be interactive. I want it come to play.

Were those the looks that you liked or you didn't like? I really did not know what was happening.

Okay, well, then I did it correctly.

You got beauties in the eye of the beholder, you dumb bitch.

No, everything I posted, I liked.

Yes. So did you see the Vanity Fair after-party looks?

Yes, I saw some of them. I loved your best friend, Emily Ratajkowski. Yes.

She looked cool.

She looked really cool. It's a better version of my Lord and savior, Kim Kardashian.

It was very similar, and Kim Kardashian didn't hit because it looked like she was poking herself in the chin.

A lot of white dresses.

A lot of white, a lot of shiny, light, airy, mermaid type stuff.

I have one hot take. Emily Blunt was wearing a dress by the designer. It's called Schaparelli. Schaparelli, whatever. Very Italian. Which Macaw was wearing the same designer, Florence Puh. It had that where it was raised. Everyone loved it. I didn't love it. I thought it was... I kept wanting to pull it down.

I kept wanting to go... She didn't put it on. It's giving when you're so stressed out and someone's like, Can you just relax your shoulders for a second? You're like, No.

I thought it was cool. I thought she looked great. I thought it was like... I didn't love it, though, as much as everyone was loving it. I actually didn't like Florence's at all.

I liked Florence's, but I think that I like the futuristic vibe.

It was art. Florence's was pure art.

Pure art. I do like anything apocalyptic or futuristic, which does overlap. I just don't like where we are right now in society. It needs to either end or get a little more modern. But yeah, it was giving like spaceship. If we were all like, there was a gala in Mars.

I like that it looked wet.

I liked... Okay, it's Ania. Who? Who's the chess girl? Ania Taylor-Smith or something.

Oh, the Netflix, Queens Gambit. Queens Gambit. Yes. Sorry, I'm so afraid. Sorry. No, I should have gotten that. I should have been better. That was an easy one for me to get from you. But it's not Anna, it's Ania.

It's Anya. It's Anya, I think. Anyway, regardless, that was throwing me for an hour. She had a really pretty mermaid-type dress.

Yeah, I think I remember what she was wearing.

But I do have to say what stressed me out is how they all go full glam into another full glam. That was throwing me because Because I was like, Oh, my God. You had to change your hair and the outfit. But is that your dream night? That's what you wake up and you go, One day I'll have three outfits in one night.

Actually, I would be... I feel like if I was at the Oscars and I knew I had a second look coming, I'd be like, Gitty, to be like, Wait till you all see my fucking second look, though.

See, at my own wedding, I changed to a second look and Paige was too blackout. I said, Paige, what do you think of this? She's like, What? I'm like, It's my second look. She was like, Move over. I'm I'm going to get a spul some martini.

I was drinking whiskey sours that night, and I haven't ever drink a whiskey sour again after that night.

Rest in peace to whiskey sour.

Wait, there was one more thing I was going to say about the Oscars, and now I can't.

I do think they were good at the speeches weren't too long, but I'm going to be honest, I was really flipping around the channels. It was too regal, and it took too long for people to walk up to the mic from the back. In that time, I'm like, I'm already on to the next thing in my Any celebrities that presented that you were like, Oh, there's so and so? J. Law, Jennifer Lawrence. She's really come in with a whole new esthetic.

She's very much giving 1950's housewife. Yes. In a modern way.

I feel because I'm an outgoing silly girly, I feel like she's consciously trying to not smile too goofy.

She's trying to give respect to the fashion community.

Yeah. She's trying to I'm different now. I know what that is because I'll do that in social settings. I'll come in in the first five minutes. You're like, I'm regal. I'm regal. I have a lot of thoughts that you'll never know.

I might have an accent.

Ten minutes in, I'm like, You know what's fucking crazy, guys?

You're laughing so hard. We're like, Can see the bag of your molars.

I'm puking, shitting, throwing up. They're like, Where is that? That's what she gives me when she walks into the shows.

She gives that. She always wants to burst out laughing.

But she's holding it in and she's like, I'm dandy. I'm still cool.

I also loved... Oh, and Des' friend one. Oh, my God.

Killian. So fun. It is crazy. So Des is like... I didn't realize how close they were, but like- Wait, they- They went to college together. That's like such a boys thing. They were just like, Well, we're boys for life now. And they just... I feel like Craig does that. Like, Craig is like, Yeah, like Steven and I have known each other since we were 12. He's my fucking guy.

We met at a gas station. Now we're fucking... He's going be in my wedding. It's like, Okay, you don't even know his mom's name. He asked me for the time once in the middle of the city.

It's just so interesting to see someone win an Oscar. He was like, You know an Oscar winner? I'm like, Yeah, it's crazy.

No, that's insane.

But also, part of me, now that I know more about the industry, the more I feel like it's all such smoke and mirrors. Not Kylian's acting, I think, but in general, the politics of it all.

Because I feel like there... This is like, wow, this is going to get deep for a second, in a high way, not an emotional way. Then I lost my train of thought.

That was the most high shit I've ever heard.

I'm not actually high.

You got to tell me something. It's going to be really high. And I forgot. Thank you.

No, I was going to say, it's funny that you meet certain celebrities now because there's a certain amount of degrees of separation, and then it humanizes them. But I feel like that's the same in anything. Even in the workplace where you're like, Oh, I'm afraid of my boss. But then when you hang out with your boss for 10 minutes, you're like, Oh, he's a fucking idiot. Do you know what I mean? No, I know. Where it's like, Oh, everything becomes so humanized.

I went on all these long drives this weekend with- Are you okay? No, I'm not. With Tracy Carnazo. Shout out, Tracy. We had to drive to West Virginia. It took five hours. At one point, I said- Wait, you drove from New York to West Virginia? Yeah, because you could fly to DC, but then you have to drive a couple of hours. We were like, Let's just drive five.

West Virginia doesn't have an airport?

What's going on? Where we were going Where we were going, there was no... I wore my hunting outfit because I wanted to appreciate the culture. No, I saw that.

They loved it. That was really nice of you to do when you were going to their homeland.

But you know I've been wanting to wear it every show, and I'm like, I have to. But yeah, we were talking just about whenever it's human nature, whenever you're doing something, you then chase the next thing. People can talk about like, No, you just have to enjoy the journey. You do. You do enjoy the journey, but it is just human nature to want it. You have to keep living. You have to keep being curious and excited and what's next.

Ten years ago, if we told ourselves, Okay, and this week for work, you have to do this, this, this, and this, we'd be like, Wait, that's so cool. But now that it's us, we're like, I'm exhausted. I'm like, I can't rate red carpet looks. I have to not.

I couldn't even put a caption on my Insta stories.

I can't do an Instagram story right now at 7 PM on a Sunday.

Get a grip. I actually thought I got that with Emily DiDonato, the model.

She posted that she had two kids.

She went to the suburbs, and now she's back working. She posted that she had this crazy workday of nine hours shooting, and she goes, Back then, I'd be stressed about it. Yeah. But now that I have kids, this feels like a vacation. I was like, Oh, my God. Your mind is so crazy.

I saw a TikTok the other day, and it was like, when you're talking to yourself in your head, you're going throughout your day, you're talking to a voice in your head. Yes. Do you think of that voice as you, or do you think of that voice as someone else?

Okay. Wait, it's crazy to talk about this because I have to admit something, you guys. I had a really bad anxiety attack yesterday/this morning.

What is it? Yesterday? I never do. Just this morning. No, I'm not going to cry. Are you? Chris, can we not just talk about, imagine if we cried on Giggly Squad and we both started laughing? Wait, like you had a legit panic attack?

Yeah, and I never do.

Like, as in physically, you started freaking out.

Yeah, and then I started fighting with my mind, and my mind won.

Okay, I didn't mean to bring this up. It was literally like a TikTok. I was like, this would be fun to ask. This is so weird. I'm not kidding.

We're so connected. I just can't.

I tried to pretend I was normal. Is that why you're wearing a bow? Yeah.

It does call me. You're going to tell the gigglers about your panic attack. And I was like, I don't know.

If it comes out.

If it comes But then I'm sitting here and I'm like, I have to tell them.

I'm like, I saw a TikTok. You're like, I'll tell you everything. I'm like, Okay, well. Wait, about what? Where were you?

You know what happened? I think I've been working really hard, obviously. The weight of the fact that I'm shooting a special in two weeks, I think I've been really suppressing it. Well, that's how I cope with stuff. The second I think about something, then it's a problem. But as long as I don't worry about it, I just wing my way through life, fling my way. You know what I'm trying to say. Then I became aware this weekend that I'm shooting a Netflix special.

This is why you were taking long drives. Wait, last night, so where are you when you start diabolically fighting with your own brain?

Well, if you want to talk about it, I got back on Sunday, and I just was in my own head a little bit. Then when you get hooked on some thoughts that you're like, That's not real. But in my head, I'm like, This is not you. That's anxiety.

You're just nervous.

I'm just nervous. But Hannah- But I'm never nervous.

But this is like, one, I had someone tell me, and this really helped, when you're doing a job like this and you're nervous, you should take it as a compliment because you care about it. You're nervous because you want to do well because you care about it. But anyone would be nervous. This is huge.

No, but I literally was... I'm never nervous It's like the stage is where I'm my most calm. Then when I was thinking about it and I was just like, Okay, now you have to... It's filmed, it's permanent, all this stuff. Dez was like, I was worried that you weren't getting nervous. Thank God you got nervous. But I'm I'm sitting at home and then I posted this thing last night and the gigglers were messaging me because they were like, okay, it's Sunday night. Calm down. The hand is going there.

Did you post a quote? I posted a quote. Oh my God, I can't believe I didn't see it. The one time I take a nap, the one time. The eighth, thousand time I take a nap, something really happened. No, this is fucked up.

You guys, this is fucked up. I can't even say it.

No. Okay. Let me read I'll read it. Okay.

The portal to every next week. No, let it out. This is therapeutic.

This is a mental health moment. You know what? Take back what we said. Sometimes you have to go to quote.

I don't know what I'm going to say.

Let it out. I really- These are emotions in your body.

Now you sound like a reality TV producer.

What's the root of this, though? She goes, Just save it for camera. Are you having a bad time at home?

We're not at home. Do you want to curse anyone out that's near you? Okay, this is fucked up. The portal to every next level is through the parts of yourself that you avoid. Then I just cast you for a second.

I need to say more. I need to say more. Thank you, Brené Brown.

Then this girl goes, No, people were just messaging me like, Hey, thanks for ruining my Sunday. And I was like, Well, if mine's going to be ruined, so is yours.

No, it is true, though. I feel like the only way you elevate is when you're uncomfortable, and then you tackled that and you're dead. Here's the other thing, Hannah. What is your biggest fear? Say your biggest fear comes true and you do this special and it sucks, and everyone's like, It fucking sucks. Hannah's stupid. Literally something will happen two weeks later, and then we'll sue Netflix and we'll make them take it off platform. I'll go there with a pitchfork.

No, I love you so much. I think Giggly Squad has brought me out of... Actually, okay, now it's a whole thing. I'm sorry. Grace's sister is here, and it's like, This is embarrassing.

But it's fine. We never cry. I I did cry, obviously.

But never. You're like, Can you cry outside? That's disgusting. No, Giggly Squad.

Removing the podcast out of comedy and into health and wellness genre.

It gets moved When I was going through a really dark time, I think every two years I have to have a mental break. It's part of growth. I was having a really hard time in Giggly Squad. Kept me through it because whatever was going on, I could sit there and pretend that my world was just me and you joking. Everything was fine. I do think that comedy has been my safe space. Then feeling suddenly like, Oh, my God, I have something important with the one thing that is my my solace and my joy, it was getting me stressed the fuck out. I feel like I'm more of a depressed person where I'll suppress and then just sleep, where I feel like you actually cope with anxiety more than me. You're good at... You have a bit of a time...

I think about it all day.

Okay. I'm glad that we're here because I'll have a normal anxiety, and then I convince myself that I've lost control of my brain. Okay. I'm never going to get it back. Okay. I need to call 911. But it doesn't happen But every two years- You're like, I'm going crazy. The last 48 hours have been a nightmare.

You're like, I'm losing it.

If I sound like a dainty hurt bird, that's what I am right now.

You don't sound like a dainty hurt bird, but it's okay to feel.

If I'm really dating and shy, it's because I'm going through something right now.

Back to my original question. When you hear the voice in your head, don't jump. Okay? That's what we're going to say When you hear a voice in your head, in the past 48 hours, do you think of that voice who's saying all these things to make you nervous? Do you think of that voice as you or do you think of it as someone else?

You're not supposed to think that it's you. I think that you have multiple voices in your head.

Well, I certainly do. Yes.

I've told myself the voices in your head are like a kid said to you when you were younger that pissed you off, something a parent that might have made you question things, something a coach said. It's the media. It's other voices that you've accumulated. When we're little and we have no worries, then society hits us. There are certain voices that I'm really good at being like, Okay, I don't believe you anymore. Then this particular voice is one that I've been suppressing.

That you haven't even acknowledged.

I don't even acknowledge her because I don't know her. This bitch came walking to my door during the Oscars.

On a Sunday evening. On a Sunday evening. And was like, can I?

You know when you feel her and you're like, and you feel a sensation you haven't felt for a while and you go, Oh, no. I don't want to do this dance.

Okay, so when I heard that, first of all, I want to preface that I've been in therapy for 10 fucking years of my life and I've never had anyone put it like this. When I first heard that, when I think of the voice in my head, I think of it as like, that's me, that's my ally, that's who I am.

That's your conscious speaking up.

Yeah, that's my gut being I'm like, don't do this, don't do this. Don't do this. I'm like, oh, yeah, she's right.

Well, you're supposed to listen to your gut, but not your anxiety thoughts. They sound the same.

Right. It's like, trust your intuition, but it's like, she's crazy. Have you ever fucking met her? Let her be in your head for two minutes.

I did an insane journaling exercise yesterday where I talked about the voice. I said, She's mean.

Writing it down.

I said, She's a bitch. I said, She's a ugly little slut.

She shouldn't be dressed as. She shouldn't She made out with a hot dog. She's two-phased.

But I was writing basically like, Wait, Hannah, this is... Fuck you, bitch. No, I had a mental breakdown. Now that I told you guys, I feel better.

I'm over here sending voice notes How many pushups do you think you could realistically do?

Actually, when you said me that, I was still okay. I hadn't had my breakdown yet.

Oh, my God.

But anyway, so yeah, I'm going through a little bit of an anxious moment right now. And I just think it's important for the gigglers to know because I think that I've worked really hard to have confidence and belief in myself and at the end of the day, just be true to yourself. But I do I think I have a disorder.

You don't have a disorder. You're being a human and you're filming a Netflix stand-up show that not even... Less people I don't even know how to put it, but no one gets to do this.

You're so right. Logically, that's so right. But then you're like, Okay, then can we stop freaking out? Then your body's like, Oh, no, we already started. The party started.

Here's the other thing. Not that I'm a connoisseur or the academy. I've heard your hour. It's fucking hilarious. It's not like you're going to- It's not about the...

I am so confident in the hour.

It's just- The doing it?

Just everything just hit me. The whole thing. A physical reaction of the heart and the... And you're just like, okay.

I feel like it's also probably a little shocking, too, because it's like, okay, here's the thing that I'm like, I started in this career and I always wanted to get to this point, but never actually thought about this moment because I'm like, Oh, that's what I'm working for. And now you're here. So that's got to be like, Wait, I did it? Now what?

Yeah. And I also think I do suffer from You suffer from anxiety. I think a lot of people that suffer from bad anxiety will veer away from things. I don't know if there's something about us where we lean into the fear. I always like to try to do difficult things and challenge myself. But no, I just had a little moment, and I wanted to let the gigglers know. But I do think the voice is not logical, and it makes no sense.

So mental health moment. Whoever's I'm talking to you all day in your head, tell her to shut the fuck up.

Shut the fuck up. But the problem is when you start telling them to stop, then you're obsessed with them stopping.

This morning is the first morning where I was doing something, and I was like, Okay, well, I was just taught that that's not even me. Then I felt sad because I was like, Wait, but this whole time, I thought it was us. We're just doing life and you're helping me. Then I realized, No, I'm by myself just trying to figure it out.

I always say your brain is a toxic roommate that is there and you can choose to fuck with her and fight with her, or you can be like, You're not healthy for me. The trickery. I'm shutting the door.

We have to do taxes and also worry about our brains. It's too much. I know.

I I think it's a culmination of a lot of things where I think I've been running on zero.

Yeah, I feel like, not to sound like Selena Gomez, but exhaustion is real. No, burn out is real.

Whenever I hear the celebrities, they're in the hospital from a tour and you're like, Okay, that's dramatic. No. That's dramatic. You're singing some songs that's dramatic. Stop vaping.

Stop drinking Diet Coke all the time and drink a water.

I think there's a lot of pressure and a lot of stress that could... I think I was just compartmentalizing it. That was a really hard work to say.

I feel like anyone can get exhaustion and burnout because it's all It's not like we're... No, we're not waking up at 8 AM and doing a labor-intensive job.

My lower back was hurting me. But that's because we're getting older. We do a lot of flying. I do a lot of flying.

But I think mentally, you can burn out from any job because you're just overth, overth. Yes.

It's literally just overth. The problem is I'm just really, really, really smart. I'm like, I can see this from a hundred different perspectives in a millisecond, and then your brain goes like, and then you're like...

I wish sometimes I was dumber, and that's crazy.

Ignorance is bliss is a real thing, but also we're not that smart, which is the funniest part about it all. But I do have to say I'm happy I'm speaking about it because I feel like a lot of these top performers or top athletes, they have to be viewed as perfect and strong, so they don't speak about it. But you'll see them in the hospital and you're like, What happened? They're like, Oh, they had a stomach problem. I'm like, Okay.

Right. Like not showing weakness.

Yeah, or they'll lie about stuff where it's like, I think that performers, when they have a big thing coming up, they do battle some nerves in different ways. Everyone has different ways. Yeah. Definitely. But yeah. Anyway, I'm trying to survive these streets. Okay, well, I love what I said, I got in a fight with my brain and I lost. I literally, at the end of the night, I was like, Okay, you've lost this battle. I'm going to go to sleep and I'll fight with you again in the morning. Do you ever feel that way?

I just can't believe you started crying on the pod. That's the first time we've ever I've done that. I was thrown for a second. I thought it was a bit we were doing.

No. Also, I haven't cried in a long time. Chris, can you support me?

Hannah, you want to know what? This is so crazy. We are so mentally-We're so connected. It's That was really scary. I was just saying to someone, Wow, I haven't cried since November. Was it you, Grace? Yeah, it was. Okay, don't talk to HR about that. That seems invasive. I'm just like, Grace, I haven't cried. And I cried this weekend. I cried all day on Saturday.

Okay, that sounds way worse than what happened to me. But was it a good cry?

Yeah, no. It was like I saw my mom and I was just like, I haven't seen you in so long. And also like, My life. And she was like, okay. Yes, it was like... It was a therapeutic cry. I was just like, oh, help me.

Well, actually, I was talking to my mom on the phone and I was crying. She was like, Do you want me to come? My mom lives hours away and I was like, maybe No. But I remember when I was living in Queens, when I was 28 or 29, every week, I'd have to go over to see her because I would feel like anxiety building up. Then I'd show up to dinner and I'd just sit there and eat and be like, Thank you. Then I feel better. I was crying about it.

I think I just haven't seen my mom. No, I'm crying at my mom this weekend, right? She goes, Well, you do this to yourself. You know you can't go two months without seeing me. I'm like, I know it's too long.

I'm like, You know what? Some of you guys are fucking babies grow up. Everyone has their coping mechanisms.

No, I also don't care because I'm going to be 75 and literally, I don't know what I'm going to be doing, but I'm going to want my fucking mom. You always want your mom at any age when you're in distress.

Yeah, it's human nature. Also, I know things were going bad yesterday. Wait.

What? Look at Kate Middleton. She's literally going missing. And you want to know who they see driving up to the palace? Her fucking Mom. Yeah, get her Mom. Something's going on. The springtime brings a lot of stuff. And for me, I like to clean out my closet, refresh my wardrobe, get rid of things that I don't need anymore. If you're like me, then you definitely want to check out Jenny Can. It's a California brand through and through, and their staples make getting dressed so much easier. It's basically picking out a uniform that you can wear every single day with different core pieces. I get compliments every time I wear a Jenny Can sweater, and they're so comfortable, and I truly can live in them all year round. The Cajmer Fisherman and Croped Cajmer Cacoon Cardigan are their best sellers in every season, but I like styling them with my Pilates outfits or for an early spring day when it's a little bit chillier in the morning, they're the perfect sweaters. They also have stunning collections for home essentials, timeless furniture pieces, cozy pillows and throws, and perfectly curated decor, and the most incredible candles. Find your new uniform at jenniecanes.

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Welcome to Red Room, a podcast where I bring you down a rabbit hole every single week. On the new season In the Red Room, I'll be telling some of the most compelling and mysterious true crime stories that I found, from unsolved murders that have perplexed slews for decades to the Irish true crime stories that happened right on my doorstep. Join me on Mondays, where we will deep dive into a new true crime story every week, only on Red Room.

Acast is home to the world's best podcasts, including the David McWilliams podcast, I'm Grandma and the one you're listening to right now.

What's going on with the Kate Middleton editing? Because I can't find the photo. What are they talking about?

Okay, so... Are you The Palace- I was having a palace.

I was like, I don't know what it meant.

So you were out for 48 hours. You were on psychiatric hold.

All I knew was I posted my Thai Journalist Investigative Report on Kate Middleton and everything went wrong. No, everything went crazy.

I was going to say the White House. The Palace sent a photo of Kate and her kids because it was their mother's day in England the other day. They sent a photo like, Look at Kate and her kids. And the Associated Press gets that photo and then sends it out to all of their outlets, and then those outlets are allowed to use that photo. The Associated Press took the photo off of their website and said, We can't endorse this photo because it has altered too much. And so people were like, What's altered about it? It was clearly... So then it was like, Obviously, that's an AI photo. That's not real. They were just like, Here's a photo. So then when they took it off, Kate had to be like, as an... This is the craziest response. As an amateur photographer, and it's like, what? I've like, editing.

Did she take a selfie?

So she didn't even take the photo. I play around with editing. It's like, okay, no, that's not it. So something's going on. A lot of people are like, Oh, maybe she was pregnant, had a miscarriage, or this was a scheduled stomach surgery. Maybe she really is just recovering. They said you're not going to see her till Easter anyway. I personally think something's going on with her husband, like her and her husband, because she wasn't wearing her wedding ring in the AI photo.

But why wouldn't they put the wedding ring if it's a fucking AI photo?

I don't know what's going on over there.

Also, even if she had surgery, it's not the end of the world for people to see you.

There was something where it was the day she had her surgery, they went at night after an event, and they had a car that they saw going to the hospital, but then they never saw her leave the hospital. It's all weird. Then other people are like, Okay, well, she doesn't want to be around for two months. Let her not be around for two months.

I want to hear Megan Markle's thoughts.

No, I was just going to say, you know who's... Get her a podcast. Get her on Oprah right now.

She has a podcast. Oh.

Or she just signed a big deal for one. She's probably in LA being like, Oh, so I'm not the whole problem.

But also, can we normalize disappearing?

I bet. Me? I was like, I have a new bill to pass. You can disappear for a couple of days.

Well, that's what J-Law did. That's what Anne Hathaway did. Yeah.

No, honestly, it'd be so shit. Because you have a husband, you can You could disappear.

Even if you don't have a husband, you could disappear.

Okay, I'll come.

Actually, J-Law doesn't have an Instagram. Someone else doesn't have an Instagram, and I was like, Oh, that's fucking cool.

Yeah, but But I'm addicted to posting, and I love my Instagram. What do you think is going to happen if TikTok legit gets banned?

Where am I going to get my-Oh my God, I was compartmentalizing that. I was compartmentalizing that.

I've diagnosed myself with three different things this weekend. How?

I don't Everyone keeps telling me it's not going to happen, so I'm just not even thinking about it. But also everyone's about free speech, and then you're taking away something that's giving free speech. I'm not getting into the drama at all. That was so political. I know. This is a mental health political podcast. Wait, I know it was really bad yesterday because I googled how to process an emotion.

Hannah. Hannah, how to speed up the fucking process? Just It's not a cake that you're putting in.

I was like, Maybe I don't know how to process emotion. So I goog it and I was literally trying to read, Okay, how do we process an emotion?

And then I was like, What is an emotion? I would love to know what Google said.

I blacked out. I couldn't... Actually, let's see what they said.

Here's the other thing. I feel like I can't process emotions because I can never identify what emotion I'm feeling. Because they were like, How do you feel about it? I'm like, I don't know.

This is why the first thing it says, Draw how you're feeling. I said, Fuck this. That's... Make a gratitude list. Punch a pillow. Okay, Gary. Okay, toxic masculinity. Scream. Let yourself cry. I said, Check. Rip paper into small pieces. What?

That would annoy the shit out of me. I wouldn't like that because then you just have to clean it up.

I'm not cleaning it up. It's basically make a mess and clean it. Vent. Okay, that's what I'm doing. Gossip. I'm gossiping. Anyway... Get a voodoo doll. The one thing that helped me in my darkest time I'm being so dramatic. I'm sorry. No, I love it. Is that everything is stagnant? Yeah.

Time is a construct.

Time is a construct. But however you feel, it never stays the same. I think anxiety stems from you thinking it's going to last forever.

Bad times don't last, but neither do the good time.

Nothing lasts forever, including us and existence.

Strong people. No, what is the issue? I can't even think about it.

Ignorance is blessed. Okay, what the fuck What else did I write?

Oh, I have an update. Yeah. First of all, we were calling Trish-Cyrus. It's Tish.

Trish is better.

Here's the other thing. Tish is Trish. That's the same person. Like, come on. Oh, yes.

Someone said it's... Okay. Tish is short for Patricia.

Your mom said that. She said we were all so idiots. She's like, sorry. She didn't such a mom way, though. She was like, sorry, I thought that was common knowledge.

She goes, I thought I raised you better. Patricia should be Trish, not Tish. Because then it's Patricia. That's just grown up.

That's the same name.

We apologize about that, but I feel like that hasn't gotten better, that drama.

That hasn't gotten better. No one said anything. Everyone's like, freaked out about it.

The silences This is deafening. I think it was Teffy was like, Can you speak up, Trish?

Yeah, just say you didn't.

Just say something.

Yeah, say one thing.

Because now it's getting bad. But this is the thing, Zadies, I get it. I get it.

Yeah, but also putting... Here's what I always like to do in... Well, because I have to do it because I have a boyfriend, so you have to explain things at a fourth grade level. Okay, that'd be like if I You know how you have to put it.

Wait, that happens so much with the male brain where you have to be like, Okay, imagine if I did this to you.

I'm like, Okay, here's a blank piece of paper. I'm going to... This, I'm here. Okay. I always try and do that. When I think about this- You do it with snacks.

It takes snacks.

I'm like, This cheese, it's me. Someone goes...

Make eye contact, keep eye contact.

Doing the Tish-Tish thing with my own mom, I'm trying to put it into perspective. I would beat my mom's ass, I feel like. I'd be like, Stop. You're embarrassing me.

Well, this is the difficult thing. I want my mom to think that my man is attractive because if your mom thinks your man's ugly, that's embarrassing.

Yeah, but not to this level.

But not to that level. Also, there's no boundaries. There's no boundaries. With no respect, I wonder who made the first move. But regardless, if he made a move on her, I'd be like, if I was the mom, if I was Trish, you made a move on me, I'd be like, Okay, first of all, my name's Tish. Second of all, That's creepy. Then I call my daughter and be like, Your man is a creep. He's hitting on me. There's so many men in the world, you guys. There's so many.

No, literally.

There's too many. There's too many men. No.

No, there actually is. We should start something.

Every time I've ever been annoyed at a man, I literally just remember.

Why are you guys laughing?

You go, This is my high thought of the day. Maybe we should start something.

You don't want me to start something. Okay. I won't start it, but I'll shut it down.

Speaking of start something, I'll end it. I'll end some shit. I thought of doing a meditation app because When I was in like...

Did you call Melissa Wouldhelp, too, this weekend?

I was this close. I was DMing Ms. Hello, it's an emergency. Melissa Wouldhelp. You said you'd be there when you need me. No, do you know who I did call?

This is... J. G. What one?

Kathy Bernstein. And we did tapping.

If you goog a yoga retreat, that's when I'm really going to call your mom.

I mean, you've told me you wanted a silent meditation retreat. I've never done silent.

Okay, so when I'm going through a hard time, it's weird.

I'm not trying to compare our traumas. But I do have to say, I turned on a YouTube... Meditation. It was just so corny. I started laughing because it's like, You are everything the universe wants you to be. I think what I'm going to do when I get out of this, because I'm still in it. I'm deep in it. Yeah, you're here. When I get out, I'm feeling free again. I'm going to do a meditation app of what you normally Normal. Or funny.

It's not that bad.

Your brain is lying to you. She's a cunt.

You're that bitch. You're also going to start a rap career?

You're that bitch.

Hannah, I love this. Our Patreon is just us meditating, just doing guided meditations, but it's just so stupid.

I feel like Ghibli Swad is a guided meditation.

It's us making a Nutella sandwich, and we're like, This calms us down. You grab of bread.

The problem is the more you try to calm yourself down, the more it makes you not calm.

The last time I had a panic attack was a legit panic attack, and it was from my own brain, was the night before I was supposed to leave from Mexico with Craig, and I legitimately convinced myself I was getting kidnapped. I had a full-on panic attack, and I called him in the middle of the night, and I was like, I can't go. I can't physically leave my apartment. He was like, Calm down. I'm just Just don't think about it. You're going to be fine. I'm like, Yeah, that worked. I got to go.

He goes, I just beat up every kidnapper in Mexico. Also, you've never been kidnapped in your 31. So I think your time's over. How long did it take you to feel better?

How long did it take me to come out of that physical situation? Probably a couple of minutes. But mentally, probably 48 hours. Yeah.

So that's where I'm at right now.

Because then your energy is low because Because you actually just used so much. Yeah. Okay, I have an update on my period, everyone. Oh, yeah. Update on my menstrual cycle. I know you guys are waiting.

Is the period in the room with us? Because you don't have her.

Certainly not. I went to my doctor. Here's the other thing. Sometimes doctors, I almost feel like it's a bit. Yeah. I'm like, Wait a minute. Are you tricking me? Because she came in. She's the nicest, Honestly. And she was like, Yeah, we don't know. What's going on. What do you think is going on? I'm like, I don't know what's going on. That's why I'm here. That's why I signed in, gave you my insurance card, and I sat here and waited because I don't know what's happening. And she was like, I know you don't want to go back on the pill, but to get your period again, we can either do one of two options. Give you this antibiotic that you take for seven days that induces your period, or you can try this vitamin, and it's not The other pill, I guess, is for people that are trying to get pregnant, you get really fertile. But also this vitamin is, too. So that's freaking me out a little. I just ordered it on Amazon. I haven't taken it yet because I'm scared a little bit.

Also, the fact you can get it on Amazon freaks me out a little bit.

No. And then I was like, Okay, how do I take it? What do I do? And I was like, How long do I take it for? And she was like, I guess forever. And I'm like, Wait, what's happening? And then she gave me a pamphlet. She was like, You can read about it. I was like, I don't want to go to medical school. That's why I'm here. Didn't you read about it? No.

I go, Give me a fucking spark note right now.

I'm like, I don't know.

This is because we don't know enough about the woman's body.

No, we don't know anything about it. I'm like, Okay, so what is even happening up there? Should I go get an ultrasound? She was like, No, I don't think you need one. Just take this for a couple of days, see what No.

Growing up is realizing the doctors actually don't know anything. Sometimes you have to go to multiple doctors.

I feel like there's a lot of OB/GYNs that are gigglers and just a lot of smart people. She told me to take this vitamin called Burberry. Burberry? I love that story. She's like, eat a bunch of strawberries. Go to Sehoe, go to Burberry, and just get a course. I don't know. I have to see.

I was obviously on ZocDoc looking for doctors? I didn't know what it was for.

I've done that one time, too. I'm like, It's an emergency. Can I please make an appointment for this week? They immediately got back to me and they were like, If it's a real emergency, go to the hospital. I'm like, Okay, that's dramatic.

I just want to be-Now you're projecting.

I just want to see if I could get an Oscar.

No, so what happened is I searched for just a doctor in New York City and with my insurance. The first girl that pops up is a girl that I went to high school with, and I said, Absolutely not. And I go, Oh, my God. Am I the age where my friends are now doctors?

No.

And then I was like, I know this bitch. She's not okay.

No, it's really scary.

Because you realize that doctors are humans. I know this girl. Yeah. She's not a great doctor.

I literally, not that I'm ageist at all, especially not to my own fucking age. I was in a work thing and I was like, Are we sure she I can do it. She's in her early 30s. Then I was like, Oh, my God. People say that about me. I was like, I take that back. Obviously, chic is qualified for this job. I would be also called- You're becoming aware of your own ageism and misogyny internally. And here we are. We're growing, we're learning, we're changing.

We're growing, we're learning, we're changing. Just like my French nail bed that's been growing.

Hannah, we have the same nails right now, honestly. I'm no nail polish. I did no nail polish for two weeks.

It It looks cute.

I'm just trying to get them somewhere.

Yeah.

Get them to a space where they're comfortable. Same.

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Do you like me when I'm weak?

I actually don't, no. It gives me the ick.

No, I'm giving myself the ick.

No, you're not giving me the ick. It's not that I don't like you when you're weak. I'm not used to you being weak. I feel like I'm going to cry. I feel like you're the one that- You're the one that was holding us up. What are we going to do now? I'm like, Okay, well, now we have no foundation. We're staring at the ship? I'm like, Is Giggly Squad even a podcast?

What's happening? You go, I have to leave because I have a lot of responsibility.

Well, I'm glad you feel better after this because my anxiety is sky high. Okay? Everything's going to come crumbling now.

I go, Oof, this has been great. I feel good now. I do this. Honestly, I just, I think I trauma-dumped on you guys, and I apologize.

That's what it's for. Let it out. Put it in the book.

But do you ever leave a conversation, you're like, Oh, now I just caused all these issues in their life. I'm leaving. That's more like my mom. My mom's having a great day, and I go, Oh. And she's like, What? And I'm like, I don't know. And then I'm like, Thanks, Mom.

Bye. Sometimes I'll call my mom and try and be like, I'm like, Be an adult. You know what? Don't put this on her. She's got so much. She's like, What's going on? You're like, Nothing. What's What's going on with you? And she's like, Paige, you okay? And you're like, Okay, since you asked, I'm actually not. That's when I went to this part of him.

I was like, Hi. And I go, Hi. How are you all doing? I'm just started telling a story. Then I was just like, I'm sorry, I'm just having a really good...

Wait, but don't you feel like... Okay, if I were to have done this and called my mom crying, I'm just really stressed out. In high school or college, my parents would have been like, Okay, You can feel sorry for your sofa an hour. Get it together. Now that I'm older, though, it's almost like they're more like... My dad treats me with literal kindergarten gloves. He's like, How are your emotions today? Are you feeling stressed?

Anyway, I wrote about peplums. I wrote, No peplum, please. No.

I'm so into the peplum. I'm very excited it's coming back. I think it's very cutesy.

Okay, that's where me and you differ because you want it cutesy. I don't like when things are too cutesy, unless it's a bow that you're then ironically wearing. I'm wearing a bow.

Okay, but I'm going to tell you something. Did you see Gabrielle Union, her outfit for the Oscars? Yes. Okay, not a peplum where it poofed out, but longer top, longer pants. I feel like you would look very good in that style.

Not to argue with you, and I totally respect your opinions. My torso is so long. When I wear a long shirt, it looks like... I look like Winnie Dupou.

But what if you're wearing a flare longer pant?

Maybe. I do like the idea of peplum because you can bloat.

100%. It's made by someone who bloated.

It was made by me.

A bloater.

A bloater. But I like to show my waist.

Yeah, you like to send to them.

Because then I feel like I lose stuff. I just feel like Peplum is not feminist.

It's It's homophobic. It's homophobic. Just calling things homophobic that clearly can't be anything is my favorite trend on TikTok.

I realized my sunglasses are slanted on my face. Then I was like, Are my sunglasses cheap? Because they definitely were not made with love.

They were like $3. You're in a fragile state. I'm in a fragile I hate saying this. Could your ears be off? Could your head be off?

Because I'm in a fragile state, that's the first thing I thought of. I said, you know what? It's you because you've been the issue this whole time. I think my ears are off. Really? I think my ears are off.

I don't think they are, but I feel like I've never seen you with a not stand.

Wait, so every time we wear sun glasses, you're like, That's tilted.

I think it's like a smidge. It's like basically your ears and my orbital bone are fucking everyone's day up.

No, and then it doesn't match with my widow's peak. That's supposed to be centered. I think my ears are... One of them is a little higher. So we're going to have to do Custom Chanel.

Shades.

Or just live this slanted life that we lead. Wow. What else is going on?

I mean, what else is going on?

I'm exhausted. Courtney and Kendra?

Oh, I I wrote down Courtney and Kendra, but that was supposed to go in the Tish-Trish thing because it's like, that's also the same name.

Oh, Courtney and Kendra, the same name.

Yeah, that's the same person. Amanda and Chelsea, that's the same person.

Oh, yeah. Jennifer and Stephanie.

Yeah. What do you think is the Hannah?

The Hannah.

I feel like Paige and Sophia, that's the same person. That's the same person.

Paige and Jennifer, to me, are similar. So rude. Do you ever meet someone and they tell you their name and you go, That's not your name? All the time. Then so I...

Grace now is not in my head, not Grace. It's Grace Battle. Oh, Grace Battle. I can't say.

No, but you know when this girl's name is Brook, but I fully introduced her to everyone as Chloe.

That sounds better.

Her name is... That girl looks like a Chloe. She goes, My name's Brook, and I go, Not to me. You know, once your brain decides it. Then later on, I just kept being like, Clown Book.

You're like, Here's the thing. Me and my brain right now, enemies. She's telling me Chloe, and I really can't go with anything different right now. I'm in a fragile state.

I can't speak back to her right now. She's in full control.

Sorry, we're not speaking at the moment. That wasn't me.

That was my brain. But once I decide someone's name is not their name, I can't see them as their name ever. But sometimes parents make mistakes.

It's the same when you have someone in your phone as like, Oh, where you met them, then in your head, you're like, That's Matt Bodega. Yes. And that's just his name.

Or you misspell his name on your phone and you're like, He's misspelling his name on Instagram. Right. It is very difficult When I don't know.

Austin Kroll on my phone will always be Austin spelt the correct way.

To me, he's always Kroll the Warrior King.

Yeah. Oh, wow. Some people are like their Instagram names. Yeah. My friend Dominique, she's Dom ChaCha. But she recently changed her Instagram name to her first last name.

And you go unfollow.

For the first time, I was like, How the fuck do you spell your last name? I was like, That's insane. She's Polish.

When I talk about her to my brother, I say Dom Chacha. Obviously. I remember when I decided to make a stylistic decision with my A's.

Did everyone experience this? Did everyone experience that? Everyone in middle school was like, What if I did it like that? Yes.

I actually rebranded.

I actually rebranded. Wait. Does everyone do that? I feel like in sixth, seventh grade, you're like, I'm a woman and my A's go like this. You stopped like, harding your eyes and you're like, I'm a fucking adult. I'm practically in college.

You harded every eye. Every eye.

Couldn't get through a goddamn test. They were like, You can stop doing that. I'm like, It's adorable. My name has an I in it. I'm not going to miss out on this opportunity.

You know what's sad? Because these days are not writing in notebooks.

Are they not?

In college, you guys aren't. Oh, you are? You're a hippie. She's writing...

She loves the environment.

She goes, I'm attached to the Earth right now. She's like, I have a farm. I'm friends with the Amish.

It's funny because there's this one thing about me that no one would ever guess. It's my fun fact. I have horrible handwriting, the worst. Nobody, every time someone sees that I wrote, they go, You didn't write that.

Wait, that's so upsetting. It's so upsetting. You feel like they see this part of you that you've been hiding?

Yeah, they're like, Wait, that's so not your esthetic. I'm like, I know, whatever. It's just like, go with it. I saw my uncle retired and he had all these cards on the table that people wrote, but I just kept looking at everyone's handwriting, and I was like, Oh, my God. This is calligraphy.

Have you ever seen someone you don't really like? And then you see their handwriting and you go, I take I respect all the bad things I've ever said about you. I respect you so much.

That's how I feel when they write something and they use the wrong they, like their. I'm like, oh.

Do you know what's a canon event? Seeing your boyfriend's handwriting for the first time and realizing he writes a four-year-old.

But see, that's how I feel people think about me.

But as someone who knows you to your core, it tracks.

Nonsexual thing that guys do that I find attractive is when they write really fast and it's like, scribble. Like a doctor? No, just like... I don't know. It's very boyish.

What are they writing?

Probably nothing. Where did they get the pencil from? We didn't talk about Just Ken.

Oh, I missed it.

So did I. But thank God. I think the universe did that.

I do have to say he's an amazing performer because he was in the Mickey Mouse Gang.

You were obsessed with the Mickey Mouse club. If I don't bring it up once, I guess I'd break up. No, I just think it's It's so niche, and I love it. I saw clips. I felt like he also didn't want to do it. I felt like he was like, I think it's weird. They asked me to do this, but I have to do it because it's the Oscars, and I'm Ryan Gosling, and I'm going to do it.

But some people argued his singing was better than most male pop stars out there today.

You know who else is singing is really good that people don't talk about? Zendaya.

Oh, my God.

She's so good.

She's so good at so many things that she... I mean, it's actually probably annoying that she's like, Should I have a hit record?

Or should I be a runway model?

She's also a dancer.

I mean, of course.

One other hot take. What was I going to say?

She's someone who doesn't really have Instagram. Well, she has an Instagram, but I feel like she's like...

Well, she hides her man. She's very private. You just have to see clips of her. Yeah. She was driving to West Virginia? Mm-hmm. This actually could have been when the drama started. I decided to listen to the whole Ariana Grande album.

Oh, yes, I saw that.

I've never done this in my life.

No, you're living your best life on Snapchat.

You guys.

Don't believe Kylie Jenner. It's all about Snapchat. Follow Hannah Bernert.

If you've been listening to this episode, you go, I feel really bad for Hannah. Follow me on Snapchat. It'll make me feel better because I'm trying to become a Snapchat star.

I love it.

Because I'm just trying to find something to give me joy in life. People are like, I love that album. I've never listened to a whole album. Me neither. I have Top 40 Taste. Give me the hits, baby. Just the hits. I go, I'm going to listen to this like the story she wants to tell.

I I didn't even know artists did that. I was like, wait, it goes in order? You're telling us something?

I've never done it before.

Never in my life.

She starts off basically being like, We're not compatible. We're divorcing. It's very her whispering. I don't love it because I'm like, You're Ariana Grande. Fucking belt. Give me like... It doesn't have to be a ballet, but don't just voice it like this the whole time. Ai could do that.

You want to hear stomach. You to come from- Say it with your chest. Yes. The whole album or just this particular song?

A lot of the song was very... All the songs were very airy, a lot of them. It was very Brandy, The Boy is Mine vibes, like '90s It's very retro '90s.

The song that everyone was like, where the music video has the dog in it and everyone's like, Oh, it was about her stealing the other husband, but it's actually about Mac Miller. People were like, I feel like this album made people not mad at her anymore that she stole someone's husband.

See, the press is being like, This is the greatest thing ever. Then you press in the comments and people are like, Stop trying to push it. There's a lot of PR happening right now because the boy is mine song is… It's actually a good one where she's like, That boy is mine, based off of a Brandy song. But then if she's singing about the Spongebob, the whole thing, it loses Which is the point. Okay, we lost the plot here because you know you want to be singing to something like, Yeah, that's fucking hot. I don't want a song about how I got Spongebob from another woman.

No, I don't want it either. When I would listen to her songs and she had just broken up with Pete, I'm into it. She's dating Pete. I'm into it. Thank you, next. Yeah, and then it's like, Okay, but I don't... Even if Spongebob was available and also the last man on Earth, I'm not I'm not investing my time.

Keep it to yourself. No, keep it to yourself. And look, obviously, we support Short Kings, we support Redheads, we support Men in the Arts.

Yeah, the last one's hard, but we do it.

But it's a weird flex. We're flex.

Yeah, let's bring that back.

That's what I think of the album, weird flex. I thought Yesand was good. I think everyone's like, Yesand is not the... I thought Yesend was the catchiest.

I also liked her Oscar's dress because she brought her whole comforter with her, and she was like, I'm going to stay comfortable. Very giggly-coated.

I liked it.

I liked it, too. I don't...

Love the hair.

I don't love the hair. She's a brunette. She's a brunette.

When is she going to address that she's Italian?

What is she... It's almost like she doesn't...

She is not proud of the community?

I feel like we should bring her a lasagna, reinforce, these are your roots, these are your people.

Yes, I think something happened and she went awry. Yeah, because- She's listening to some other voices in her head that are not Italian. Right. I'll tell you that right now.

No, but her- There is a voice in my head that is 100% Sicilian, and she's terrifying. She'll burn your fucking house down.

One thing, too, with Ariana is she had that phase where she only wore her hair in a ponytail. I loved that phase. But I've seen her with her hair down and she's stunning, gorgeous. You know there's something going on that she has a particular view of how she looks, which I get it.

I think she wants to look very innocent right now. The blonde, really pale gives a lot more innocence than like, Brunet high pony eyeliner that gives like-I just stole your man. Yeah. I think that's also a PR play.

It's a lot of strategy involved that's honestly above our pay grade.

Yeah, we can't. We cried this We're going to cry to our moms.

No, we both cry to our moms.

We don't have time.

Giggly squad, I love you guys so much.

Decompress before you go into the office if you just listen to this. Maybe take a minute for yourself. Do a 10 second meditation.

Say Juru.

We really apologize for this episode. It's unlike us. I was caught off guard just as much as you were. I'm trying to bring up a TikTok, and as a full-on meltdown. Thank you so much for listening. We'll be back next week. You never said the goodbye. We're in a crisis here. Goodbye.