MBMBaM 541: Angels in the Ragnarok
My Brother, My Brother And Me- 1,190 views
- 28 Dec 2020
So long, stink year! While we’re not quite ready to provide a sagacious tagline for 2021, we’re more than ready to send off this one with a thorough look back. And also a look forward, and kind of to the side, and also downward. We’re looking all over in this one. Stay frosty. Suggested talking points: Big Moments in Entertainment, Love Actually Actually, Margen, Scoreless Basketball, Munch Montage, Aunt Rhonda’s Bean Bean Casserole.Ways to support Black Lives Matter and find anti-racism resources: https://linktr.ee/blacklivesmatter
The McElroy brothers are not experts and their advice should never be followed. Travis insists he's a sexpert, but if there's a degree on his wall, I haven't seen it. Also, this show isn't for kids, which I mention only, so the babies out there will know how cool they are for listening. What's up? You call? It's familiar. Hello, everybody, and welcome to my brother, my brother, main advice show for the modern era.
I'm your oldest brother, Justin McElroy. I'm your East brother, Travis MacAvoy.
I'm your sweet baby brother, Griffin McElroy. And Travis has a Travis has a voice, everybody.
Well, so I thought I thought, you know, it's here it's this the last episode of the year.
So we could do our normal every year like we do every year standard just kind of year in review. OK, I talk about how twenty twenty went, the highs, the lows.
If we can even think of any the fashion.
If you think of any lows. Yeah. The fashion, the trends, the movies that shaped us. Yeah exactly. Yeah. The cultural milestones. The moments that united us physically.
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
There's a lot, a lot happening this year was that there was other pizza at twenty twenty.
No I think that, I think that was twenty seventeen. Oh shoot. I also knew was wait though.
OK, what about balloon boy. That feels more like a balloon boy preceded pizza balloon boy flew so pizza rat could walk and steal pizza. So I know that that's, that did not happen in 2011. Kicked ass pizza and flew also.
Yeah well. I played video games. That's not good. You now we're looking for Travis, we're looking for cultural touchstones. We're looking for. Right.
Big important moments in our in our in entertainment history because that's what what are we now, if not part of entertainment history.
Yes. Oh, there was that moment when they said the one movie won an Oscar, but then it was like, no, not this year, I don't think.
Fuck, really. I don't think I didn't win, they didn't win one this year, I will say fucking come on y'all, Scoob. Schools fucking school definitely came out this year.
Ice. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Did Schoop come out this year? It did.
Celebrity faux pas. They had to bend those who who really stepped in it.
Decir Oh oh alleen Åhléns stepped in, stepped in it this year.
So when she went to that football game, she did she was she did that first off, everybody was like, Ellen's not a nice person, surprise. And everyone was like, wow, that is a surprise.
Look at her dance. Are you sure w and then dance like that. Yeah. And then she's like, I'm not mean. I'm chilling with work.
W. Bush, we're at a football game. What's more American than that, Al.
All right. It's hard. We never really talked about that because I think we always assume it's just on the brink of having us on our program. Oh, so we don't really talk about that stuff a lot.
But she has to wait for an opportunity when there are three openings. Yeah.
And a three and three chairs and three chairs. She doesn't she's having more made. She keeps that center.
People keep telling us, yeah, I feel like if the one thing about us is that if we decide if we're at football, if we were there just like double dip and some nachos and enjoy it, I like I, I feel like we probably would be that this is the exact day that we would get bus. You're right. This is the exact thing that would bring it down for us because like so so.
Yeah. Well GW is there. I feel like we would have to get a chill go it just for that. Just you know what it felt like it was for the vine. Yeah. Right. You know, that was just for the vine guys.
They're making a ticktock don't you get it. Oh it's for the vine guys.
Fucking Tiger. You remember him. I, I actually missed that. I didn't watch it. This dude this dude is straight up zany gang. Yeah. And the way he hurt those animals. It's not funny.
It's not funny.
But every other thing about him, aside from the assassination attempt and everything else, that that dude's sort of snuck right down into the fucking Zainy.
Oh, I loved that John John Krasinski got out there and he was like, it's good, fam. And then he was like, and then he sold it. I guess his show. It's good, fam.
He sold it. Sold it. He did sell it. Good. It's so great. Why can't we ever so right.
It would be like if somebody came to you jassan and offered you a million dollars to buy the idea of man squad from you. Yeah.
Which Justin would do in a fucking heartbeat. Of course I would.
I wouldn't sell it to John though, because he'll just he'll move in to my squad and all John Kerry will move into my squad, kind of polish the place up a bit, give it some new curtains, the curtains of celebrity, and then he'll sell it at a profit.
Oh, he'll flip it. Yeah, he'll flip phone squad.
He's a bit flipper. He's a bit flipper. Anything else memorable this year?
Anything else fashion swifties got there filled in and Swifties, you know, Taylor Swift listeners.
Oh their bellies they have sell their sated aren't they.
Big bellies laying laying on the futon.
Just I could tell that music grease all over their cheeks. Oh I couldn't possibly Taylor another one.
All we got WRP is a kid. That was a song that everybody really liked. Yeah. Yeah. That was a good one. A powerful anthem. It's yes. That's what it stood for. What a powerful song. Yep. Mm hmm.
Women are powerful. What it stands for. Women aren't powerful.
I never looked it up, but that's what I assume I like bring together, like figuring out what things stand for. It's got to be women are powerful acronyms. They call it acronyms, Scottsburg acronyms.
Anything else from the year there's an election, there's a big election. That big one. That one went good. Yep. Pretty good.
Very smooth. Very smooth. Dreamy did come back to me. Really. Yeah. He super died. But I guess come on back because they're having fun over there. That's it.
That's the last one. That's all that happened. It was a pretty smooth year.
Pretty quiet sailin baby. At least in the world of entertainment we can agree. Yeah. Quiet. Yeah. A quiet. Yeah there was that, there was that much quiet about Mountain Dew doing a cookbook.
Remember that. Oh I don't think we can do our own.
I thought there were some pretty epic things that was news. I mean that was news just because we touched on it.
She Travis, tell me more about these epic things. We did well, at least as long as they weren't epic fails. Oh, that night I have nothing. All right. Well, I started doing play along at home.
That was new. That was new. So, oh, I found out that Ritz's will sell you the good ice by the bag if you want to.
Really? Oh yeah. The round, the little pebbles, the good ice.
They'll give you a bag of ice for three for me that I found out that night. The late, late breaking in here I think. OK, so that was our year.
Cool.
I didn't have any bathroom time accidents while driving anywhere in a car and that is for every year. And that's not that I do that often, but it's why I'm so cautious to make sure I go every time before I'm about to leave the house is for this exact reason. So I can claim at the end of the year, no baths, no car based bathroom accidents.
I didn't murder anyone this year.
That's that's huge. Yeah, that's you. This is an advice show. Justin, did you murder anyone this year?
This is an advice show only with jokes where you're never forced to incriminate yourself ever.
I'll get it. You have to work harder than that, I'm wearing a wire next year, and, yeah, that's true. Next year we'll be naming twenty twenty one, picking the theme of the year. It's hard to imagine that, Will.
It is it is a time honored tradition that we have fucked up pretty much every single time.
This it's. It is. We've talked about this before. It is cartoonish how bad we did this. It almost makes you want to counterprogram to see if we can steer the year.
Oh, you know what I mean. Work against a theme.
I don't know. That seems like it might be.
We've done some, I guess, collaborating. I feel like some people did OK in that lesson.
Well, there's there'll be plenty of time when we talk about this for an entire episode. But yeah, right now, let's help some people. How do I pretend that I have actually yeah. It's a tough sentence, construction.
And I just blame you for just racing right in there. How do I pretend that I have seen love? Actually, my friends keep making references to it, but I'm just not interested in watching it. That's from Saving Time in Seattle.
This is a question I very much relate because I too have not seen love actually like that is not. It is. It is. Absolutely. That's impossible.
OK, let's let's.
OK, a bunch of established British actors play gentlemen who have a series of love affairs with their employees.
Do you don't you don't really realize that until about 15, your 15th watch or so when you go damn, this is all bosses and employees and their kissane, everyone's like, yeah, and Rick Grimes is in it, right?
Yeah, right. Right. He's got a different it's a different thing.
His, he's not a he's not a boss but he is like he holds up a sign he's he say you have seen it.
I have not seen it just and everyone knows that in love like you could live on the moon.
I just find it hard to believe there's no parts that you have not lost most at this point. Have you not seen it as an intentional thing or.
I just know it's never come up. People will be like, oh, you got to watch it. I'll be like, OK. And then like, I just don't it's not like I'm actively avoiding it. It's just it's never happened.
Except for I talked about a little bit on Twitter.
And I think the thing is my thing on love actually right now is that except for all the parts that are bad, it's pretty good.
OK, well, a ringing endorsement.
I'm running out of the booth right now to go. Why?
That's everything as as you would expect me, right? I mean, this really is a human. Absolutely. For all the bad parts.
I'll give you a guarantee trap. Bill Nye. He fucking rips me. Yeah, he always does. Like every time I could watch him in two Pirates of the Caribbean, it was the first thing he's ever been in for a movie.
Really? Yeah. He's been in stuff for like, who's this fucking clown right at the end of this movie.
Like this dude read like every other thing he's ever been in probably is like Esmie parishioner, John, and I'm a detective now.
Right. And it's like seven mini series on BBC and I'm Parish John and I'm a parishioner and also a detective.
God, I watch that. But this one is like I'm a rock and roll washed out dude and I fucking rap and I'm so funny. And my storyline is virtually unprovable. It is.
It is still problematic for the fans sharing. It is virtually the amount of fat shaming.
But like but by love actually standards baby that's pretty good is Hugh Grant and I feel like Hugh Grant is. Oh yeah.
I hear that he's doing his thing.
How problematic is his storyline. Oh baby travel tell you Bud.
President Billy Bob Thornton comes to visit his place because he's the prime minister, but he, as far as I can tell, touches the shoulder of an employee that he has his eye on.
So he basically declares war on America. So not far just in the movie Love, actually, which is good except for the bad parts. Aha. He he falls in love with an employee, then the president's shoulder and he fires are back to golf when he fires. Ah. But luckily you see. Right.
So it's so dope, it's so fucking tight because then like the next five scenes are people partying because the prime minister just said to America we're not fucking friends anymore because you touched you tried to steal my girl.
OK, yeah.
Billy Bob Thornton is the president of America, which like. Yeah, they're off now. Yeah. I mean, yeah, basically. And it's OK.
And correct me if I'm wrong. In the Rick Grimes storyline, he holds up the signs to tell a friend's wife that he's in love with her. Is that correct? Yeah.
So you have seen it? I haven't seen it, Justin. So how problematic is that one?
Pretty. I mean, don't know. That was just that was just weird, man. Love, actually. Mine's pretty weird stuff, man. It's another good name for.
The movie, oh, jeez, there's also it opens with a just a pretty choice 9/11 reference, and then it also ends with us celebrating a huge breach of airport security protocols.
And you're like, yeah, breach those airport security protocols for the name of love. But also you did the time period. Not great for this.
Yeah, it's a trip, not a good flick, but it's a lot of fun except for the bad stuff. It feels like a lot of usable stuff for the question. Ask her to reference.
Yes, absolutely. That's that literally. I can't think of another thing you need to know. Is there anyone else in it? Of note. Everyone is in it of note, Travis. OK. Oh man. Mr. Beans in it. Yes. Real. Yeah.
He's got a super funny bit. He's got to actually super, super funny bits.
Laura Linney is in it. Yeah. Yeah. This is not funny anymore.
Now you're just seeing things but I feel like. Can I say something politically speaking, we have answered the question absolutely.
Because now having assuming you listen to the answer is listen to this episode of My Brother, my brother May.
And then you come away with it, like pretty much getting it.
Yeah.
This podcast within a podcast that I'm calling Love, actually, actually there's some porn people watch yet some body doubles for sex, making it a lot of body doubles. The Hobbit like nudity in The Hobbit is naked in it and Laura Linney is naked in it and other people are naked in it.
It's like surprisingly like now Elijah Wood Hobbit or that other guy watching fucking Morgan Freeman.
Yeah, not not Morgan Freeman. Martin Freeman. No, I said it wrong.
OK, Morgan Freeman. Martin Freeman. Make love as body does Morgan Freeman as The Hobbit and make a baby named Morgan Freeman.
OK, so can I do. Yeah, I'd love that.
This is our son Morgan and we love him very much. We're proud of him even though he's never accomplished this one.
Sent him by Brian. Brian sent this in. It's from Yahoo!
Answers User more will never will. He's the worst seven year old on the planet. I'm extremely proud of myself that I dislike Morgan. I'm proud of him, even though he's disappointed me. And I'm sorry that I have also wanted to say it's very rude of me, Martin Freeman, that for a while there I took all the parts from everybody and did leave any.
That guy? Yeah, that guy.
We were screening himself, by the way. We were so close what I was trying to power through.
I know, but I just wanted to say Morgan Freeman treated himself to being that guy on the office. Then he dipped into love, actually, and got a snoot wet over there. And then he's like, I'll just go ahead and be Bilboa. Yeah. And then he's like, let me let me real quick, just Knab Arthur Dent real quick, because nobody can think of other people like me. And I'm just going to get Arthur Dent real quick.
And then I would just love to star in Fargo and go ahead and slide me into oh Sherlock. Iconic roles. Dr John Watson. Yeah. Might as well like grab that up to. Let me just see how many of these parts I can fit my mouth. Well it's obvious why Margon can't live up to that.
That's so, it's so hard for Morgan Freeman and that's just more stuff you can use.
And somebody like you seen live actually.
And you can be like you mean the one with the dude from Fargo and Sherlock and The Hobbit and with a disappointing son with a disability son.
He died. He just joined the soccer team last week. OK, on and on.
A very weirdly related note, Brian sent this in. It's Yahoo! Answers user more 850.
Who asks, Has there ever been a scoreless basketball game?
Oh, I couldn't find any example of a pro or college basketball game where the plays were tracked, etc., and where the score was something to zero or even zero to zero. Has this ever happened? I assumed it would be a big story if it did. If it never happened. What is the closest to a scoreless game ever? Either closest to zero zero or closest to something to zero, i.e. by this point margin, I'm only interested in documented games, not some games you saw one time.
It can't actually happen. And it's actually that. Yeah, basketball rules rules preclude it. Right.
So here's the way it works in sport. Uh huh, right. And this is Amateur Semipro Pro-Am Pro.
And you know, you are a scorekeeper for the, I believe, elementary school team. Yes.
The Miller Owles. I was the scorekeeper for that basketball team.
And here's much no longer exists a school that is a park because they fucking slam dunk the house down.
Yeah, they shattered the rim and that was apparently holding the whole thing up. The art school, the gymnasium, the lunchroom. Yeah.
So what happened? This is here's the deal, any time that a score is run up sufficiently on the other team to where there's not much chance of it being competitive.
At that point, you trade in or you sub in, if you want to use the parlance of sport, you sub in some of your bad players to give them a chance to get more accustomed to being on the field of play, which is to say the basketball rectangle.
And they'll they'll they'll they'll you give them a chance to kind of get the nerves out, like playing your first big game. But the stakes aren't that high. And the problem is, if you go long enough down that road and the other team is still scoreless at that point, you are mandated to start doing what are called inspirational Sabine's.
Oh, for their Facebook page, basically.
So, yeah, if the game gets to play exactly right at that point, the mascot comes by like I would love to shoot a few or I'd like to play point guard for a bit and like they start some guy, the people in the crowd like anybody out there, grandpa who never made the game winning.
You see where we're going to coach to the coach.
But he's wearing a propeller hat, a girl, whatever, you know, whatever, whatever. Just whatever it may be. That was a joke about society. Griffin burning his players. But the point is that is what happened.
The farther down that rabbit hole you go, the more people. By the end of it, the opposing team is going to be like Alaf, a trash can.
See, the idea of capital is like you're not going to have another like another stationary basketball that's wearing sunglasses, a team from that bottle planet from Superman, you know, the bottle city of Kandahar, an actual air bud.
But it's just a dog that doesn't really have the skills.
I got to start somewhere. But that is why you cannot have a zero zero a scoreless game, because eventually there's just no competition whatsoever.
I think I think it's mean that in professional sports, they don't have the mercy rule. I think that that because I remember being a kid and playing a lot of different sports and really appreciating the fact that the mercy rule existed, because mostly it meant that I could start, I don't know, picking up pieces of grass in the field or whatever, and I could go home and think about my poetry or what have you.
Yeah, I'm good.
Yeah.
I think that that needs to exist more because I would like to see more press conferences with, like, grown adults talking about how they got Mercede.
That would be something, although I will say, Travis, at half time, the monster, the monsters were up 63 to 18 over over the town squad that is so high that they could have they could have gone ahead and, you know, joined them off to more on mountain right then and there. But they didn't they came back.
They played the whole damn what a great name for an amusement park, by the way. Let us acknowledge that if there was a place called Moron Mountain, like in your hometown, you'd be wicked proud of that.
Yeah, yeah.
I'm just thinking maybe the monsters weren't the bad guys. Hey, let's look back and really re-examine.
I think it's time that we put a new lens and look at space jam and see if the monsters are the bad guys.
Weren't they were pretty tacitly endorsing slavery.
I'm pretty sure that team was that.
Yeah, but we haven't even considered the idea of the scoreless basketball game of two teams playing each other. I'm not saying like it's alpha and a garbage can, just like maybe two teams like the Orlando Magic and the Charlotte Hornets are just having an off day and it's third period, third quarter.
And it's just like I got again. Well, eventually one of us is going to have to get this in, but it's just hasn't happened yet.
There is another option, though, and it doesn't have to be there playing indoors. Course, it could be like the like the Golden State Warriors against the Oklahoma City Thunder. Yeah. The two teams that I think are good or at least have been within the last decade.
Oh, I see. And they're so good now. It's becoming a defense, a battle of defense where like they're making good shots, but it's just like every time, boom, someone's there, boom, someone's there, boom, someone's there. Oh, they're playing their golden hearts out. Alternatively, they both got sixth man.
Oh, they both got ghost ghost friends, ghost family.
That's like in there.
And so when somebody comes up to dunk one in and they just use their ghost hand to slap it away, I think if that happens to you once, that's probably enough for you to be like, oh, there's a ghost, there's got to be a ghost.
Can you imagine a scene like that happening in a movie? And then there's a little kid in the crowd and he's like clutching his little pendant. But then the same thing happens for the other team, too. And he looks across the court and there's another little kid sitting on the other side and he's holding a different pennant. And they look at each other and they kind of mouth like, did you pray to God, too, that they would win?
And I prayed to God that they'll be mad.
This is a there had to be the the, you know, MLB commissioner at some point had to be like game. We got to start keeping an eye out for his fucking angels in the. Everybody's got angels now. Everybody's got angels now.
And it's great like we're out there and it's like, oh, man, is old or old Tony Danza going to pitch a no hitter or not? And then it's like but fucking ten feet overhead, there is a biblical angel battle happening between what is happening right here every game.
And if just download when at some point the baseball would stop. Right. You couldn't keep doing baseball with that going on.
Well, as in the sky, you see, like fucking I don't know.
Grace Lloyd pulls out his flaming sword, strikes down. Yeah, yeah.
You see the little boy stand up and wave his arms to signal that angels are here. But across the field, a different boy is also waving their arms. And you're like, oh, no.
Oh, no, it's the angels. Then you hear seven horns as the seals rip off seals. It's time.
And this is an exhibition game. Yeah, we're ending the world. Really all star game. What do you two three musketeers. Right? It's the bat.
It's the battle where it's the all star game is the battle when all stars will be snuffed out in darkness.
All right, All Stars, this is the celebrity versus the retired baseball players charity event. What is happening? Oh, I need to just lift it up, Daniel. It flew over the base is what is going on. I'll tell you what's going on. We're going to the money zone. Thank God.
Oh, that was smooth as butter, baby. You know what everybody needs, what trap? Well, I mean, there's if you think about a lot, there's a lot and there's a lot. But you know what they need most of all stamps.
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Did you know that, Griffin? Yeah. Yeah, I did.
You know, I'm we're reading the same ad copy. I know everything. You know, there's nothing. You know, I don't.
OK, what did I have for lunch? Spaghetti.
No leftover ribs. Now I think of it.
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Travis has been telling me forever about babble. It's a new it's a cool and learn Etruscan.
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But in Japanese and shit, I've been taking pigs pig Latin classes. I've almost got it.
It seems like the Clintons are everywhere, right? You can't. Yeah. You can't swing Fazer without hitting some cling ons. They are infiltrating our society.
Well, good, if you can. Sorry. It's good. You can talk to them and be rational as much as they are willing to be rational with you, you know, and babble is a perfect place to learn Klingon. All right.
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I'm just going to go out on a limb real quick and interrupt Griffin, one more time to say, I don't know if they teach Klingon pigs, Latin or ATRISCO. I just want to make that clear in case they are listening.
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We nailed it. Hey, it's the last time in 20, 20, but I did want to say ba ba ba ba ba ba ba oh, a funeral for a friend.
Yeah, we're going to say goodbye to it for this calendar year.
It's the last final month squad of the year due a big, big, big bump, bump, bump, bump, bump.
I want to munch squat squat. Ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba. I want to munch squat bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum.
I put it in a minor key as pretty.
Have you guys noticed the sunset period of my squad is longer than the first period of months. Glad the sunrise period.
I suppose there was more, there was more episodes in Twin Peaks the return than there were.
David Lynch directed episodes of the original run. Interesting.
I don't have a Munch squad this week for this final episode, but I wanted to kind of just go through all the press releases that are right now and I want to say goodbye.
It is it is not actually the end of my squad, obviously, but it is the end of twenty twenty. And that means that it is the end of brands talking about how bad twenty twenty has been and how their their products are the solution to that. So I want to just go through some very quick ones just to kind of say goodbye to it, because it makes me happy every time a brand does it.
And so I wanted to say goodbye to him. And when I tell you some of these headlines, the articles, you might struggle to think of how they're going to do it, but I'm sure they will. Some of these I haven't even found out yet. I'm just confident it'll be. Their tropical smoothie cafe introduces Mardi Gras on the menu for the New Year.
Mm hmm.
So they got, you know, hurricane smoothie and some fresh Cajun style food items, fresh Cajun style smoothie as guests nationwide welcome a fresh start in the new year.
We remain committed to providing guests better for you, smoothies and food that inspire a healthier lifestyle, says Charles Watson, the CEO of Tropical Smoothie Cafe LLC.
We understand Mardi Gras celebrations may look a little different this year, OK, but it's our hope that these fun and bold Mardi Gras flavors transport guests to Tropica time and provide a moment for a little break.
How inspiration, you know. Yeah, it's useful, yeah. Burger King is offering a new dollar menu to not one dollar your way menu.
We know the value is extremely important to our guests, especially now.
Oh, boy, says KMO Ellie Dhoti in a statement. That's why we set out to create a menu that offers capable products like our bacon cheeseburger. They can't be found at the same price anywhere else. And I got to hand it to him. I can't. I buy a Burger King Burger King hamburger for a dollar or any other restaurant. But what if you could?
Hi, I'm Travis Mack and here's my I call it rebirths, that you sell them the hamburger and then you buy it right the hell back.
The deadly toll. Business Insider.
This is the part that I really actually can't make heads or tails of that Burger King thinks about what might resonate with customers at any given time during the year and attempts to provide a solution.
But what do they need?
When we when we promote when we promote a value menu or launch one dollar your way menu?
Being sensitive to win that might be most useful to our guests is definitely top of mind. What is happening?
You have a big red button that says one dollar menu and you're like not you're hot. They're not ready. We gotta wait until they need it. If it goes out now, we will go unappreciated.
The Hangover Crystal returns by popular demand for one sixty nine folks. I am at three in a row here. I'm just going down the hangover. Crystal is back for one sixty nine. That is a little crystal hamburger with bacon, egg and cheese and onions on it.
A fresh cracked fried egg seemed fine and all that crystal is well known as the go to remedy after a night of overindulgence, says Angela Johnson, VP of Marketing.
After the ups and downs of twenty twenty, the hangover crystal with this fresh crack fried egg is sure to be the perfect cure. Your New Year's celebration.
Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep. That tracks. That tracks. Papa John's launched his new epic Stuffed Crust.
Let's see if he's got one here. Come on. Come on, baby. Hungry Project Deliver.
He does say as we continue to develop new Kraven will menu offerings, we're always inspired by our fans. That's well, that's beautiful, I think. And that's something our fans continue to ask for. So you give it to him, don't you? Nasty.
You know, wait. They don't explicitly say, but also things are pretty straight, they them then we're fucking free, aren't we? Then we're fine. This is I know people are so stoked about this vaccine, but to me, this is the sign of the times that we are just through this thing.
Yeah. We finally I mean, that is really the sign Graffin that covid over there. And we're all safe now, you know, we're getting to get in there. Well, it feels like everybody's safe to just burn your masks. But John says that it's fine to burn your masks, burn your pants, whatever you got.
Really, Taco Bell's fame, not your fries, returned for the holidays in a year is difficult and uncertain. Is this what is we know our customers crave the comforts they love. That's why we're excited to bring back nacho fries, because Trump was a bad president and coronaviruses and we thought that would help if not show fries came back because of the of so many people that died coronavirus that nobody could touch anybody. But you can get these Dr. Fries and we think they'll fix it.
The magic of Dr. Fry franchise extends beyond the menu item itself. Oh, it's the magic of the Nuch Fries franchise.
It's going to reach out of the menu and into the empty chair where Grandpa Bob used to sit.
It extends beyond the menu item itself and is brought to life with our next saga of the Nacho Fries movie franchise that we hope brings some seasonal and seasoned joy fucking fans. Now only we can.
This is another sign of times people like can we start being ironic again? We've been been so we big boys this year just talking about how shitty everything is and how we hope we can bring you some comfort.
But now can we start getting fucking silly on it?
Go back to pretending like nacho fries are the most important thing on the planet. You mean acknowledging that there are other things on the planet of Taco Bell for a year now and it's killing us? Are they being nacho ironic now?
They're not. OK, all right. I really thought they were the sixth chapter of the cinematic trailer style ad creative titled The Craving and starring Sarah Palin.
And Joe Keary explores the thrilling journey of a Nacho Shut Up explores the thrilling journey of a Nacho Frye obsessed protagonist in his intensifying desire for Taco Bell's most capable creation. As the potato plot thickens, I think.
Listen, I'm not going to go off on one of my famous Dennis Miller style rants here. Yeah, but if but if Taco Bell truly believes that not your fries are the most favorable menu item, then I would say the Taco Bell, every time it removes nacho fries from their menu, has committed an immoral act.
Well, you know, Justin, sometimes the people, they crave it too much. And society, that's when we have a recession. So talk about hats and listen, we're all sad that they're gone. But the economy is able to rebuild as people once again focus on their jobs and bills and whatnot. But then there comes a time where it's not about the money, Justin, it's about the people. And the people need the nacho fries and it's time for them to come back so they can be distracting.
Now, here's what I think. If Taco Bell really wants to commit to this, they're so crazy about this movie thing that they're making. But with a man killing someone to get nacho fries, it would be gruesome. And I would say maybe even like NC 17 that. And I think if they did that, they would probably see like a three percent increase in sales.
I mean, I'd love to see him try. It'd be worth a shot, you know. Yeah. There's just not enough, like, oh, let's make let's make it a Hallmark movie or whatever about AC Slater making some fried chicken and it's like, yeah, OK, but how about also there's full frontal nudity in it. Right.
Let's be adults about this and let's make our weird fast food movies just a little bit more explicit. Game of Thrones came out and that was all about Coca-Cola. So let's focus on remember how the enigma is about Coca-Cola.
You remember when it was like there's only one way to stop this dragon flame with an ice cold Coca-Cola.
And they were like, who gets to be king now? And they're like Coca-Cola, the king of soda, and changed their motto to Coca-Cola. King of soda.
You remember you remember that remember when Arzak was like, winter may no longer be coming, but that doesn't mean we can all chill. And then she lowered his sunglasses to took a big drink, a Coca-Cola. You remember ice cold Coca-Cola. You remember. Remember?
How about another question? OK, sure.
I'm at a permanent employee at a place that hires a lot of temporary workers for the holidays. Mostly having the extra help is great. But there's one thing that annoys me to no end. I have a favorite seat in the break room with the most comfortable chair and the quietest spot. It's a prime spot. The majority of my regular coworkers know this is my favorite spot and leave me be during lunch breaks, breaks and lunch.
But the new people seem to descend on my table en masse and steal it from me every single day. How can I keep the newbies away from my favorite spot? That's from Sete Squatter in Spokane. Well, considering the one good news is you're listening to this on December twenty eight there later. So they're unemployed now. And you got you're sitting pretty, huh? Things are looking good. Things are looking good for you. You got that feedback, didn't you, Scrooge?
Mm hmm. Also fake vomit. Oh, that's good is another thing. Why are those funny prank gifts whoopee cushion dog do. Those are all, sir. Joy buzzer put a joy buzzer on there and somebody sits on it and it's just zaps their ass like just a bunch of Krazy Glue.
No, that's the opposite because that they wouldn't get up. Yeah. What's the opposite. Krazy Glue. I'd say glue normal glue.
Saint Lube Place. Yeah. There it is. Just some old sand.
Speaking of pranks. Uh huh.
Um I, i the pranks for Charlie for Christmas, OK, he loves pranks.
You actually watch those videos and those are even really pranks.
But you know, we can those pranks.
So again, some pranks and there's a prank.
That was a shocking lyter, huh. And I was getting these pranks. I at that. I was like, oh, that would be fun. And then in my head, I had this thought, I have to teach you how to use a lighter. And I realized that what I just thought was I have to teach our six year old how to use a lighter so they can get shocked by it. And the horse impulse, the worst variables I've had so far and I've had to humdingers, but I will have to teach my six year old how to use a lighter.
She could be shocked by the fake lighter is is pretty high on the list.
I mean, maybe try new chairs. Have you tried all the chairs? I feel like probably not anybody who has a favorite seat in the break room hasn't.
Or at least you haven't tried the chairs in a while.
Maybe there's some new maybe there's new sort of spring orientation in one of the chairs that you should be excited to to have.
You know, in many ways, the New Year is like a new chair, you know. Yeah.
Oh, what's the view going to be? You know, what kind of sights and sounds and smells are there in this new chair?
Oh, I've got a great view of the snack machine. And I can see that one of those chip bags is dangling there.
And if I just slam my shoulder into it, free lays, you know, and that is a lot like finding love in the New Year.
Yeah. Hey, can I do a Yahoo! Yes, please.
Um, this was sent in by Graham Roebuck. Thank you, Graham. It's Yahoo! Answers user Dan who asks, what is something non edible that you wish you could eat?
Oh, good question. Down the top.
Yahoo!
Answer on this is just like and I'm sure they shot this off for seconds after the question was posted in its pods and like, yeah, yeah, it's a meme, but like. Guys, when I see those things, I still think, like, what's that, there's a fucking flavor mystery about these. I know that's played, but damn, what was the last time you saw these guys, don't they?
Look, I feel pretty strongly about dice because they're so, like, really good looking, like hard candy looking dice out there.
That's how you want to be like a hard candy. I like there's a sort of three dimensional polygonal shape to gushers. Yeah. That like I see I see a nice date. And I think, oh, I could, I would love to gush on that.
Mm.
I think pretty much anything I wish I could just I think would be really dramatic and not for everybody. Let me be clear. I want to be like moderate or bad where like there I just be in the middle of a conversation with someone like oh hold on one second. And I just like take a bite out of a car. I just think that would be such a fucking power move.
Yeah. Just cause there's like lots of things you could write, I mean, like you would want to all the time, you know what I mean.
Like, I bet sometimes things are messy, like if matter your life had roommates and they're like it's really messy here.
Can you how much do you think they ever tried to get to do that.
Just like listen, trash day is it for almost a week and there's so much trash literally piling up.
Could you just eat all trash?
What if matter, either lab didn't have a cyberpower. He just really liked making people happy and he really liked it.
Just he loved women just like dollar like cafeteria bets of like eat the spoon is OK.
And moderator I just said low self esteem do fucking anything for the mind and really strong enamel. If I was like yeah I was just reading it, I read it. Is this one. We're having a good time. Right everybody. It's funny. You guys, you guys remember my name. Right. You'll remember it tomorrow. Yeah. Yeah. To the next party again. Right. I'm eating the bottle.
My birthday's coming up but the shoe.
OK, ok. I'll tell you something.
I'll tell you. I'll tell you. I'll tell you boys and the folks at home. One thing that's not edible that I wish I could eat and exercise and you know, Ronda's green bean casserole we have a on.
It's fucking putrid. Rhonda, I've never met Rhonda.
You would know her by the smell of her being bean bean casserole. That's what she calls it. Why doesn't she want to meet me?
Do you know the woman that that always brings the things that her name is Ron. That it's his sister? Yeah. That's your room.
Oh, fuck. Yeah. Yeah. You just never made the connection. Yeah, I never put that together.
You know how there's always that being bean casserole. Yeah. At Thanksgiving and Christmas and Easter and Halloween for some reason. Yeah.
Yeah. No I know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's in your mailbox. In your mailbox.
Very threatening. Yeah.
You know she always carries a knife in it. This is you. Yeah. Just leaves that little doorstep that's around. Oh yeah.
Every Christmas when she comes over she races as fast as she can to your bedroom and dumps green bean casserole all over the bed.
Yeah. She's individuals. Some places you won't find them for months until the wretched stink is inedible. Food Mass has claimed your. That's Iran. Oh okay. Yeah you're right. I know.
What that one morning you went to check on your first born and they were gone and it was just green bean casserole left there in their stead.
Yeah. And we've launched that like nationwide search that lasted for. Yeah.
But then it turned out it was just the dad. Sister Rhonda.
Yeah, that's right. That's true.
Yeah. I remember when you were trying to perfect teleportation technology had somewhat left a grade because they're all inside and you turned in to have green bean casserole.
Oh I remember it. Well that was Amron. She's the one that left there. OK. I just can't keep her. I just can't keep that casserole down. It's not that bad. Put a little ketchup on there.
The twist, the twist of the thing we need to clarify in this question, when is something not edible you wish you could eat is would we be able to assign the flavor to it?
Because things like fingernails, if they didn't hurt your belly and they tasted like Pringles, that would be pretty cool, I think.
But I think the reality of it would be like, so say it was like cars, right? You could take a bite of a car. It would be car flavored.
It would taste like just because you can chew it up and swallow it and digest it doesn't change the fact that it wouldn't change the atomic.
Yeah. Oh, gosh, uh, fun today, you know, at lotion. OK. No, OK, yes, actually, it's also good. And sometimes you get too much lotion and you're like, what am I to do with all this?
If you can lick it off, like it right off your hands, clap your hands. I'd be perfect every.
So that's what it tastes like, what it smells like or what it tastes like. Lotion, which is I, I would wager pretty bad.
Well it tasted too good.
That would be hard to moisturize because then you start looking yourself if if the lotion tasted good and you can't eat it, it has become yogurt saying yeah, just like if yogurt makes your hands soft and it's not doesn't taste very good, that's lotion.
Yogurt seems sort of flexible enough that we're going to get some people tweeting and that's like actually makes a great moistness. Stop it. OK, please.
Twenty is almost over. Let's just get through this. You can get back on our case next year. All right.
But just give us a break for once. You know what? We'll do the same for you. We'll give you a break from listening to us continue to talk it.
Just give you a nice clean when you thought you were going to have to go into this for the long haul.
And we're going to let you out of class comedy class.
We're going to go five minutes early for some reason. Sometimes Justin is just done. Sometimes it is done.
It's been a long year. And I think that we could all use a few minutes to ourselves. You know, everybody gets five quiet minutes.
We're going to put our heads down.
Don't look back at the teacher's desk. We're back here and you lock your kid's door. And you told them that they could come out in sixty minutes. When you're done with our show, you get five extra minutes however you want to spend your time.
That's graduation's drink some water. Hey, with that five minutes, drink some water. Close your eyes for a minute.
Just breathe, breathe.
Oh, just breathe, breathe and listening and listen to us tell you that we have a book coming out. A couple of books I wanna tell you about.
January twenty sixth and nine p.m. there's a free virtual event. We partner with six independent bookstores to promote our book.
Everybody has a podcast except you is a how to book, how to podcast.
But it's also funny and fun to read and we worked really hard on it. And if you preorder from one of these six Internet bookstores, you get a exclusively designed book plate signed by one of us with your copy while supplies last.
You can get a bit, Dadawa, before for McElroy podcast, book event for bookstore links and more information.
I also want to tell you that the sawbones paperback book is, as you're listening to this, Will is out tomorrow, I think on Tuesday.
So please, if you have not preordered that already, please preorder that to the first week is really important for a book.
And if you could just tweet about it and help us make that a big hit, that would be just the best I ordered to happen.
Justin, thank you.
Are selling them at three dollars above market price. Wow, that is less great. You can get them wherever fine bookstores books are sold or in my house.
You can come to my house, I'll have twenty copies for sale and I'll even sign them for you if you get it from bookshop agreeing affiliate like we actually support real bookstore or you can go to Travis McRoy Dotcom and look at pictures of me.
OK, another great thing to do. You can also preorder the adventures on Crystal Kingdom. It's the What Jesus fourth book in the series.
I go to The Adventure Zone Comic-Con. It comes out July 13th. But go ahead and make sure you got a copy heading your way. And we also have a bunch of merch, Travis.
We do have a bunch of merch. If you're listening, do you have like two or three more days to order the Festo pin of the month, which benefits the Transgender Law Center? That Festo pen? It's really, really cool if you haven't seen it. And the proceeds go, like I said, to the Transgender Law Center, which employs a variety of community driven strategies to keep transgender and gender nonconforming people alive, thriving and fighting for liberation.
There's some candlelight march on there. And I know what you're saying. Wait, isn't candlelight?
No, it's never over until it is.
And I guess this year, it's January 4th is when that's going to end, because through January 4th, all sales of our candlelights items go to benefit Harmony House, which for anybody who has purchased merch in the last week or two and watched the the candlelight special, y'all have gone above and beyond helping us raise money for them to thank you. Again, all of that available at Macquarie Mirch dot com.
Thank you to John Rodrik and Long Winters for use for theme song. It's a departure album putting the days to bed. That one almost got away from me, but I feel like I grabbed it by the tail, pull it right back into the boat, didn't I? And the other thing is maximum fun dog. I want to thank them too in a big way. Thanks, maximum fun dog.
And we want to thank you. You know, it's been a tough year. It's been a tough year, I guess. And you're as challenging as this one. I think it's time we explore new soft taco opportunities.
Hey, do you want to call them Taco Tuesdays? Yes, thank you.
This guy who was sent in by Connor, it's from an anonymous Yahoo! Answers user. I'm going to call. Margon asks. How did they move the Statue of Liberty for Ghostbusters to there? My name is Justin and Travis. And I'm Griffin McElroy. This has been my brother. My brother may kiss your dad square on the lips. Maximum fun dog comedy and culture, artist owned, audience supported.