On today's part of my take, we have a final four, we're going to recap the Elite eight.
We have update on Jak's one shining moment lists, one shining marshman, one shining Marchmont, hot, cool throne, and our good, good friend Dallas Braden on the show because baseball is back on Thursday. So we're talking a little baseball.
We're doing everything we got, every kind of sport covered. Oh, and also Kevin Durant is our new champion online packed show for you and is brought to you by our friends at Bacardi Bacardi Rum Patron, Tequila, Doer's Blended Whiskey, Scotch Blend and Bombay Sapphire Gin are the best spirits to add to your basketball watch party.
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Today is Wednesday, March thirty first.
And guys, I am basketball.
Doubt it was, it was a tough couple of days. The late start times. I initially was like, you know what, this separates the casuals from the real fans like me. If you're willing to stay up until 10:00 for a tip off to school nights in a row of ten o'clock tip offs, I think I've seen enough.
That was a mike that was a micro aggression against me. When you tweeted that on Monday night because we were doing a live stream and smartly left after the first game and then tweeted like, this is when the real men and I'm sitting in the live stream studio being like, fuck, I wish I was home.
I had my shirt off and I was horizontal on my couch. I know I was literally shirtless, laying down on my couch, being like all all yuppy words out there that I can't stand tall in the late hours. I think I fell asleep during the second half, left the office.
But yeah, it has taken its toll. It has been an incredible march, an incredible tournament. Let's just start with the game we just watched. UCLA is in the final four. What a fucking run. What an ugly game. But credit to Mick Cronin, credit to UCLA, credit to hep Cronin, as the L.A. Times put it.
Step aside, Sister Jean. It's Hep Cronin's NCAA turning out. There we go.
Have Cronan. I mean, he was we had we had eyes on him in the first four when they were when they were shown the camera to him, the love to him all first four.
He's got 400 wins as a high school coach. Wow. Yeah. To know that nado pretty. He's an honorary Big Ten guy to them. Yeah, that's true.
Yeah. I mean, he I mean, he basically was a Big Ten coach in Cincinnati for the majority of his career.
Right. So it counts. Yeah, I'd say so. He's Big Ten Coach. I'm trying to spin how well Jalen Sogge and Jalen Suggs. Bryce Drew. Scott Scott Drew. Looks like Scott Walker, the governor of Wisconsin.
He's from Indiana. Right. Scott Drew. That counts in Indiana. There we go. It's all big time.
Don't. But yeah, that game I Michigan, I don't know what they were doing.
Like, they it was very clear at halftime when they came out in the second half, they're like, all right, we're just going to feed our seven footer who's better than everyone on the floor. And then they did that and it was effective. And in the last two minutes, they're like, now we're going to chuck some threes.
I thought it was weird that they had Hunter inbounding the ball on the last play because you got caught. He got point five seconds left. You want your big guy to catch it? Put it up quick. But I think I think John Howard was like, you know what? The Wagner family has meant so much to the program. We're going to have him get it, get a chance to redeem himself for it. Maybe the one of the worst air balls I've seen on a wide open look.
He they're just kids. I just want to throw that out.
There's a disclaimer, but Wagner was so, so bad and he should get credit for getting Michigan to that part because he did pick up four livers in this tournament and played very well. But that was it's you know, whenever you, like, talk about injuries and a guy like livers being out and I'm not making excuses for Michigan. Yes, I did bet on them. Yes. I wanted the Big Ten to have some representation in the final four, whatever.
I don't ultimately care that much. But whenever you have a guy go out, you can survive for a little bit. But you basically need your, you know, next guy's up to have those great games and pick up the slack and to expect Wagner to do that every single night. It was probably too much. And it's just, yeah, it was a hell of a game.
But UCLA deserves all the credit. Using was the best player on the court tonight. They basically were playing football, basketball.
And you know what? The the most underrated part of what UCLA has been doing in this run, their free throw defense has been phenomenal. For some reason, every team they play just misses all their free throws free. So credit to them.
Does that mean that they foul harder? Yeah. So when you step to the line, you're still feeling the effects. Is that part of building or not building? Is that part John Wooden's success pyramid? It is. It is. By the way, the success pyramid is John Wooten.
So having the booster that paid everyone who no one talks about at UCLA, not MIT Cronin's program, Cronin runs a clean program. What they shoot from free throw tonight, Jake, Michigan or not?
Oh, no. Oh, no. I thought you had that. If I get it before you, that's a problem and you're probably going, OK. Jake, this way, your team. They get the ball wet. Oh, my darling. Six for 11, you know, six or 11. So the last two games, the UCLA, his opponents have gone.
Seventeen. Quick math in my head. Seventeen four. Thirty six. That's pretty good. Free fence, great free throw defense. So, yeah, it was, it was an ugly game but it was drama.
We almost got our Buzzer Beater. Oh that's my computer. ESPN channel ESPN to having more.
They have more ads that play when you go on ESPN than than our guy auto play because I've also got updates, whatever button you hit on your computer while you have an ESPN page, somehow it's the it's the play button. Yeah. So like when I was when we were doing like our our Burmans after NFL Sunday and I hate control. I have to find a player's name. Team Control plays a video. Yes.
It's actually Jimmy Petero. The greatest thing he's done for ESPN is just so many auto plays that that's how the revenues come back.
I think Mike Greenberg is just an auto play person. I think auto play put him in a chair and he just he gives you a highlight. It's auto play holds up Greenberg's salary. Yes. They're like, OK, we're going to sign Greaney to this much money. Well, slap a few more auto plays.
Yeah. He's also a great uniform matchup tonight.
We're we're by the way, I'm sure our website has a lot of auto places. Oh, for sure. It's not there.
Just just as a general disclaimer for anything that we ever say, we're the biggest hypocrites on Earth like start up, though. I asking everybody, it's like we are the biggest hypocrites. Yes. Yes. The uniform matchup was fantastic. Great, great uniform matchup. That was probably the only pretty part of this game.
Yeah. It reminds me of Sweden. Yeah. A lot of blues. March Madness is what I called it.
There we go. Magnus von Magnason, we're talking world's strongest man. When we watch it. Gonzaga rolled. Gonzaga gets to their first final forever. Congratulations.
Good job. Finally rest. Well, I we were still doing that.
If they if they lose to UCLA, truly a team that's already played a play in game. On top of all this, I feel like it's not really a fun. We have to take that away from them.
Gonzaga had the classic situation tonight where everyone is so sick of how good Gonzaga is that they all said to themselves, USC is the toughest opponent they'll ever meet. And this is a terrible matchup for him. And I I tweeted, obviously, I lost a bet. I said, don't overthink it. Gonzaga is not good. And they have now there are thirty, you know, and twenty nine of the thirty wins have come by double digits and they're almost twelve and a half point favorites going into a final four game.
That's got to be one of the biggest spreads ever.
What was their only single digit win was a BYU in the in the I would tell a championship or oh Jesus.
I've also seen he's been down.
I don't like it.
I'm telling tell you the truth, we're going to boost you up this year. There have been a few games that I've watched with Gonzaga. Love you were they were. They're losing at halftime. Yes. Yeah. So they do have but they're just that good where they're not going to play. Forty minutes of bad basketball.
Yeah, well this is that Gonzaga, West Virginia, West Virginia, December 2nd.
OK, there to see how they beat BYU by ten. They were down to a half in that championship game. Oh, OK.
Breaking news. Breaking news. I don't like that.
Look at all Bill Walton. Text me back. Let's go. All right, Bill, it's so right.
Before we started, we were brainstorming like, how do we get on the show on Friday? We're going to try to get Mick Cronin for the people. But then we realized Bill Walton and I realized that I I had his number and I hadn't texted him since twenty nineteen when he texted me back saying shine on dreman, build on, carry on, be dub. He texted just now. I said, congrats Bill. What a run for your. I feel like I should have called him coach.
Just even just coach.
Yeah he our brother. Yeah. Congrats Bill. What a run for your Bruins conference of champions. And he wrote back never in doubt. Space, space, space. Wow. Space, race, space. Incredible SpaceX greatest story ever told. Space, race. Wow. Space, space, space. We just had a miracle. Yes. I love it.
Bill with two ls what do I do. Follow up. Hey by the way, I love it. Come on. Our party. Yes.
Would love you to tell the story on the record. On our part. I like that. Yeah. We'd love to share the story with our audience on the podcast.
I'm going to throw it all right. Now it would be a miracle of it. Sorry. All right. Who would be the best storyteller. Oh, OK.
All right, you guys talk among yourselves real quick. I'm just going to do this real I think about this. I'm going to throw in a Grateful Dead lyric as well.
I think I'm might throw in one from the wheel. A friend of the devil Bill.
You a little Nasacort know the wheel, my friend, with benefits of the devil I'm going to throw and I'm going to throw in the OK.
Yeah. All right. All right. Here we go. Unbelievable. So happy for you, I'm so happy for you. I would love for you to tell, to share the story, to share your story on the podcast if you have any free time this week for someone else besides your hotseat.
My hot seat is major, the White House dog that once again became a staff member.
Yeah, yeah, sure. That's that's two thus far, right.
He got sent away once and the second time he's a repeat offender. So we need to figure out something to do with Major. I actually so I suggested that chap's train major, because that's what chaps this dog was. I think he'd do a good job at it. I think Major might just be a bad ass. I think Major just he might be, you know, what Major might be Magga. And so he's he's fucking shit up at the White House because he's pissed off.
He doesn't want to be there, hates the government, hates the government. Yeah. Meijers, a libertarian.
But I like that. Yeah.
It's not a good look to have the dog, although I think it'd be all the people that thought Trump is just in Biden's body is actually Trump is just an Meijers body.
Freaky Friday switch with a German shepherd. Yeah, I like that. It would be sick though if if the president, whoever it was at the time, had just a shitload of rowdy pit bulls in the White House that just pit everyone like attack dogs. It'd be pretty cool.
My cool throne is pro days, so there's been a ton of pro days. Melosh All the quarterback stocks. Yeah. Going around seeing their stocks. Zach Wilson had an insane throw away rolled out left. Yeah. And then cross body through towards the right pylon like seventy yards and my dreaming.
Yeah. What do we know that we had this exact number.
We talked about this. Yeah. No just let them cook.
No but then. But then Justin Fields' attempted the same throw. Couldn't do it. He went left and to the left pylon and then.
OK, Glenn Miller, I saw your tweet.
No basically wasted combine's of like regular people just doing their Kellin bond, was able to do the sick cross body. But I think Pylon but I think Fields' was intentionally throwing it wasn't like a mistake. He was he obviously couldn't do it because he was trying to imitate it. All right. So it cut through all your storytelling back. As entertaining as it is back, Jones probably was not good.
He did not he couldn't do the cross. I throw Kelan. Martin was able to do it. Yeah, I'm sick. Yeah. Billy Bill Belichick was watching and he was, like, shaking his head. No, it was the opposite of the meme where he puts the binoculars on to get a closer look. He was putting the binoculars on the opposite way to look further away from back Jones because he was not. You should just stock up. Stock down, Billy.
I have done I'm done with the tax. All right. Here's what I got.
I wrote back. Unbelievable. So happy for you. I would love for you to share the story on the podcast. If you have any free time this week, we can be totally flexible to your schedule. UCLA back in the final four and I changed the lyric a little. So it's the lyric is I had one of those flashes. I'd been there before. Been there before. It's from Scarlet Begonias. I wrote you had one of those flashes.
You've been there before.
Been there before. That's good. That's good. That's good. Right. It's good. I think I think he's definitely I feel good about that. I feel good. It's out in the world now. But more importantly, you miss Billy's electrifying recap of quarterback Pradesh's.
Oh, Telli Zach Wilson. Did he do a throw? You see the sixth throw?
No, but then they try to imitate his throws and the only one who's able to do it was Kellen Mond and Justin Field Future Bear Your Bear and then Max Jones. Mack Jones didn't even like do you any.
OK, so my hot seat is going to be my hot seat is going to be Matt Jones because you do any cool thing.
He also overthrew some people and we are NFL. NFL Twitter is so funny because like I love when NFL Twitter is like I'm not going to watch college basketball, I'm just going to watch pro days. Yeah. And there's a bunch of tweets that we're essentially reading the body language of like Kyle Shanahan and Bill Belichick every time you, Mac Jones over through someone. And they were never like check was just watching. No, Bill Belichick did have one clip where he looks to the guy to his right.
He's like, nah, it's not good. But Kyle Shanahan, it was just a clip of what it was, a cutaway to caution and who is staring straight ahead. And they're like, Carson hates this. Kyle Shanahan's regretting moving up to three. Now he wants like he was going to take Matt Jones at number three anyways.
But you know who had the best pro day? Who built that old Miss Pro Day?
Jackie Kelly has swag swags back. All right. Let's get back to basketball. Thank you, Billy. All right. So Gonzaga is a wagon. That was incredible what they did the don't overthink it game. Because didn't you think that it was sometimes when a team so dominant, we do it with Alabama football all the time where it's like you talk yourself into maybe this. Be a close game, and I'm doing it right now with UCLA, and you have to it's not Baylor.
Here's why. UCLA is going to be a tough game there. They're not as good as some of the other teams that Gonzaga has played recently, but they're trying to get the most out of their ability. They're tougher. It's going to be like playing in, like, off rhythm. Yeah, exactly. Like, hey, we're not even playing basketball. Exactly. They're so fucked up. And well, here's the thing about UCLA. They were really good early this season and then they just got bad for a while.
Now they're good again. They're tapping back into what they had back when I first started watching in November when they were good.
So they do have it. I think I'm going to bet on UCLA to cover the spread, but I don't I don't see no way Gonzaga is just a wagon.
And so the other side, Baylor, the must pass. They tried. It felt like they were like they kept on making these runs. They get back to within like seven, though.
They got even they got even closer. They were like I think they were down for three with me.
Five minutes left. They couldn't hit that big shot that that that really got it. Like, oh, Baylor is now going to start making plays. Incredible season for them. And I don't know. I mean, that was another one where it's it's they're just kids. Moses Moody, who's going to be a lottery pick, you know, didn't have his best game. And he's he's a freshman, you know. I mean, like, they're just kids.
Just remind yourself that.
So I think that Baylor is going to shit pump Houston.
Well, so Houston deserves credit. I'm going to I'm going to do it. I bash them that I remember the Dana Harbison's the coach there.
They just I don't know how they do it, but every single game, they just get a million more rebounds than their opponent.
And they just they I should be like how I like to play pickup basketball where I can't shoot, can't do anything, can only rebound. I should be a Houston fan because that's kind of like if you if you hear anyone talk about Houston's like their defense is unbelievable, their offensive rebounds. Unbelievable. They can't shoot what's their screen game like.
They just they just put it back in the screen game is an important part of your pickup game to and special shout out to Oregon State, my personal national champion who finished the season on seven straight games where they covered the spread six out of seven as big money line underdog hits. So they deserve I think they're the spread national champion.
And I do want to go back on one thing that we talked about. It was right after the first week in college basketball where we were saying how like Baylor, how Houston should be in the big twelve, but they're not. It turns out that it's a classic case of the University of Texas not wanting Houston in there because Texas is always like we need to be the biggest dick in the biggest vagina possible. And guess what, Houston? You're too big of a city.
We don't want that competition in state from you. We want to get the big recruits from your area. And so the University of Texas just threw their balls around and kept Houston out. So that's a retraction. That's an official pardon. My take retraction. Yeah. Look, they they tried to get into the big twelve. Yeah. And we're cougars. We're kooks. We're hypocrites.
Yeah, we are hypocrites. So the final force at all, Texas, final four on one side and then Gonzaga versus UCLA. The the this is going to be not that we care, but there are people who care. Probably the lowest watched final four. Right. Hmm.
You don't have any traditional blue bloods. I mean, UCLA, UCLA, throw in there, UCLA, Gonzaga is going to be a big game. But it's also then it really doesn't matter who Gonzaga would play in the finals.
Right. It's also everything is nothing east of the Mississippi. Like you don't have any big know of any sec. So but again, I don't care. I'm going to watch it. I'm going to love it. But, you know, you'll hear people say that afterwards.
Oh, the ratings, please. Even though I have bad news for us.
So we started the show talking about how this schedule has completely killed us.
They had the highest ratings of the Elite eight, I think, ever.
So they're going to keep this because, of course, they did the Monday on Monday and Tuesday night versus the Sunday and Saturday afternoon.
A little perspective a year ago today, we would have rearranged our entire weeks, rearrange our entire month to watch one basketball game at 10 p.m. on a Tuesday night. Fact, perspective, fact.
I mean, this storm has been crazy. I it's it's been fucking crazy. We have an eleven season and we still have the two best teams that everyone thought were the best team since the first ball was tipped still alive.
You can't really ask for anything more than, you know what they need to do if they want to goose the ratings, get more microphones, courts, get a microphone on the rim so you can hear the brakes a little bit louder. The squeaky shoes. This court tonight had squeaky shoes than the other court did.
They should they should loosen the rims. Yeah, loosen up rims. NCAA let let let them fill it up and chain nets and chain nets.
Longer nets. We need longer nets. All right. What else from the from the final four from. Oh Jake. Your one shining moment update. Yeah. There's a field.
We had three blowouts so I don't think Bill Walton's texted me back, guys. He's probably like just in a state of bliss from reading that I might have put him back in like an accident. Yeah, that was Lyrica lyric on his head. Mm hmm. He's back in like it's Cornell, 72 all over. So the text was too good.
Yeah, it was Seventy-Seven first to have Oregon State is big cats, personal national champions. You told me to put that on the list. Yup. No specific shot but you.
Yeah. Bede's then Dave had a request of Baylor's Deti Richards getting hurt emotional after the injury, which means she was getting great.
The tournament, the UConn Baylor Whibley was better than any Elite eight game in the men's side for sure. It was an incredible game.
Yeah. So shout out to the women's attorney, Mark Vital putback slam for Baylor. Corey Kispert three. He's made plenty of them. One of those that got put in there, Johnny Drew's hang on UCLA had an ugly banked shot that went home.
Maybe I would say him limping off the court and then coming back. Yeah, that's Varner's Miss three might be on there. I don't know if that'll make the list.
You don't think so? It was a good shot because it's the agony. The agony of defeat. Yeah, I know.
And it might be. Let's get to sixty four. Yeah. Hunter Dickinson screaming. I have that next. Hundred yards getting excited. Yeah. Jake, my apologies. It's OK. No I wasn't like no, listen, settle down. Are you OK? Oh, yeah, relax, have Cronan just something. Yeah, yeah, it might just be have Cronan, it might just be sick.
It might be. I got three the other day.
How they show up a lot, but they literally showed them eight times after the game was over. Yeah. Then they show the buzzer beater miss and then they show up and every time there's a big moment that ends up going in his favor, it takes him like a full two seconds to react to it afterwards. There's always everybody around him. They start swarming him and he still hasn't blinked yet. He hasn't shown. He's just like, thank God he's just got more relief than he does Joy sometimes.
And then UCLA, it seems that they have good chemistry because the bench always has their arms around each other the way they usually fibros.
That's where right now one shining good glass. Yeah. Yeah.
The last like thirty to forty five seconds of the montage are entirely the final four usually. And it'll be a voiceover like gymnast's one night.
Here we go for all the marbles. Right. That, that's true. Yeah that's true. They do. They say the final edit it's like Yeah. Kind of blows.
Right, because you see that Greg Gumbel they're like killing some time at a desk for like thirty minutes.
That's what they're doing. Yeah. They're editing when they, when they cut the nets down, all that stuff cutting down if they were chain chainsaw fuck they should do that.
I mean you have to I thought were going to say how could you cut the nets down. I've done it before. Not a big deal. What. America's championship.
Twenty nineteen. You remember that big cat on the net. There's a video and pictures.
I don't know if this is that I'm part of the team.
OK, if I was a broadcast true part of the team do some learning to do on traveling party.
You keep the nylon. Yeah, it's in Florida. But yeah. If you frame it. No I should. You should make a bracelet out of.
Yeah. Quick question Billy. How many America East championships did you win. Hmm.
Yeah. Oh. Who's the real athlete who not get to. That is tough. Do you have a ring. No ring.
I we got we should make you want anyone who's listening. There's a ring maker. Please make one. I would love to see them do like how they do the Stanley Cup right after. It's one where they, they come backstage to see the guy making the trophy at the James and I would love to see them have a camera on the guy that's editing, like just sitting down with final cut opened up on his computer. It's like adding the last bits.
He should be in it. Yeah, he should be in one shining moment and he should be the last one where he hits export. Yes. And that's the end of it. Yeah.
No, that's the start of it. That would be great. Oh yeah. Yes, yeah.
It starts. Whoa. Mind blown. Yeah.
That's fucked up. Bill Walton would die if you saw that Bill Walton.
And you know, I'm actually worried that he might be in a different dimension. Imagine now imagine dying from a text that blew your mind too much.
The big cat like where have I met big cat in a former life.
It's only nine thirty there. I was there. Yeah, I was. I hope.
I hope he responds.
If not, I will definitely try to just call him and be like, hey, we're taping. All right. Hotsy Coltrane ready hotsy cool thrones brought to you by our friends at Coors Light and Coors Seltzer. You've been seeing us. The Blue Mountains have been chill. Tweet us your Blue Mountains. We love those Blue Mountains.
Every time I see a Blue Mountain, I just want of course, I get happier. Absolutely the best.
The mountains on the bottles and cans turn blue when your beer's cold. That way you always know when it's time to chill. It's been a long month. There's been a lot of hoops. Well, guess what, maybe chill this weekend, maybe chill out on a Saturday. Just have a couple Coors lights or maybe a course seltzer and enjoy a nice chilled beverage.
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Hotsy cool thrown Henry AMA hostage Michael Strahan. Oh, yeah. I saw that he got rid of the gap in his teeth, that song, I thought he was always his whole line was like, I'll never get rid of this. That's my point.
Yeah, it's like that. Be like Anthony Davis shaving his eyebrow. Mm hmm. Yeah, that's weird. Right. And he already had the TV job.
He had everything like establish basically like Urlacher getting hair.
But Urlacher Urlacher was more when he was getting into TV. Michael Strahan is already, you know, running shit everywhere. Right. Right. He's like the king of TV.
Right. What if he doesn't get any more jobs because of. Yeah, I mean, I recognize it's weird. His approval rating will probably I mean, people are used to seeing the gap, but it's like, you know, like everyone embrace your imperfections, dude.
Yeah, I agree with that, Hank. Well, at this point, you sold out if you had done this right after you stopped playing because you're like, I didn't want to get it fixed before I was done getting hit in my face all the time. I would understand that. But then afterwards, no, I don't like it.
That's why I don't get breast reduction surgery. Jonah Hill, right. Well, no, he just got skinny. Yeah. For Moneyball. And then he was like, I'm not getting real skinny.
Nobody is skinny right now. Got fat again. Yeah, you're funny. He's skinny. That's why Big Cat's hilarious tonight. Yeah. I am so fat right now.
I need to, I actually honestly need to lose some weight.
I think we spend so much time together that I think that I think you look good right now. Well, I am. I have been on a diet for two two days. OK, so that's probably that's what I noticed.
But yeah, I let's say March is taking its toll. I wake up with a stomach ache most days from eating too much the night before. That's a bad sign, Hank.
Cool. Oh my cool was people in the West Coast because the Sweet Sixteen ratings were the best they've ever been or like the best in like thirty years.
So they're going to probably continue to do this ridiculous late night schedule going forward, which sucks.
Yeah. Thoughts and prayers. All the kids out there got to get up early for the zoo meetings and podcasters. Yeah, mostly for us. Really. Mostly for us is that hey yeah OK. My hot seat is capital letters. Capital letters on the hot seat. The Miami Marlins renamed their stadium tonight, and it's the loan depot. Park and Loan Depot is with a lowercase L and they specified this park is always to be written with a lowercase P.
Well, that's the official name. Here's a real whoa. I didn't realize this till today. I never thought about it until today. The the lowercase P is the same as the uppercase P just moved down just like a little bit lower.
Yeah, but it's the exact same letter. Yeah, well is a bigger two and it's up because it might be yeah they make it barely, barely. But if you were to move the lower case P up to the normal of an uppercase letter, it would look small, but it would pretty much the same. Basically a perfectly average sized letter. Same but difference a little bit different. Yeah, but so from now on we need to specify that it's a lowercase P.
If I see anybody putting an uppercase P out there, I'm going to report you to, I don't know, Bud Selig.
We should do that with part of my take and then just resell all the merch. Be like if you're with uppercase P Mirch it's illegal. Mm. Yeah I like that. Like when players change their numbers. Yeah. New segment. It's called Part in My Take and it's whenever we talk about the Miami Marlins ballpark.
Mm hmm. Yep. I like it. My cool throne is Hue Jackson. Oh. If you've been wondering what Hue Jackson is up to recently, I've not. Well he's doing a media tour again. So good for you. He likes to come out of the woodwork every, like eight months and remind people that he's not a bad coach. Mike Silver and anything about him. He was not involved in this, but I'm sure that he'll get it.
I'm sure it was Mike's idea to go on the air and say this. In his interview in Cleveland, Hue Jackson told people that when he went one in twenty three, he got a secret contract extension, but he was told not to disclose that. And so is a super secret contract extension. Technically, he's still the head coach of the Browns. This is actually the best spends on the Hugh Jacksons ever done. And he is that's all that Hue Jackson does, is try to find spin zones.
Technically, Hugh Jackson got the Browns to the playoffs this year. Yeah. So he's still employed. He's the shadow coach of the Cleveland Browns.
God, I just respect the hell out of you for not giving up for for like fighting for dying on the hill of saying one in thirty one is actually not a bad head coaching record.
Someone who needs a friend who can just be like you, maybe instead of just hitting on every girl at the bar, maybe just chill out and see if maybe any, like, come up and talk to you because it's getting a little desperate. It's starting to reek of desperation.
He's wearing me down. Yeah. Yikes. He's wearing me down. But I do like the idea that he is the shadow head coach. I'm going to consider Hue Jackson the shadow, the actual head coach of the Browns, until I think he's got like another year. Yes. Left. Yeah. Yeah. OK, all right.
My hot seat is Jake because Jake, you ready to do it? He is going to read us some of Kevin Durant's Instagram DM's to Michael Rapaport, maybe not the maybe just the ones the last ones that Dave posted. He just read those. Yeah. There you go. So Kevin Durant is the most online person of all time. I think he has done the impossible. Usually when people are more online, they become worse. People like I know I'm a worse person for being online all the time.
Kevin Rent has become more likable by being online more.
Yeah, well, I don't know if he's been online more. He's been higher, concentrated on one account online.
He stays online. He's saying it with his chest online. Like people who stay online just suck. Yes. Kevin Durant. I agree. I think I we used to call him the baby back bitch on the show. No, now I think he's he's super cool. Kevin Yeah. No he is super cool, Kev. Yeah. Yeah. No he's and we're not just trying to say this because we've actually made a turn on him like a year ago.
I feel like we've been like, yeah, actually we kind of like him.
And I think it helped that he left the Warriors, even though he just has even more of a super team on the nets. But that's fine. And that's the Nets don't hurt anyone. No, the nets are like just whatever. They're kind of around the title, like, OK, I do.
There aren't that many Nets fans even in the New York area. No, no. I live in Brooklyn.
I think it's just I don't see anyone wearing Nets gear ever. So I'm cool with the nets. The nets. Well, yeah, we won't play to win, obviously.
That's what I was going to say, Jake. OK, go ahead. He's got double cross.
Yeah. Yeah, you did get double cross. Big time has the ultimate double cross. You thought I was going to bring up like wow. It's probably listening to this podcast.
These are Kevin Durant's Instagram DM's to Michael Rapaport.
You called your lawyer like the pussy you are. Ha ha ha.
That's how many hours or and he did it like that, you couldn't talk Portnoy talking shit, defamation of character, crying emojis, pussy ass lawyer up your wife mad as fuck, because you wasting that little bit of money on lawyers because you can't take a joke on how pussy are you.
Your wife doesn't even respect your bitch ass. And now Michael Rabenau posted these himself. Yeah. Yeah. He was like, you know what's going to be cool if I post Kevin Durant owning me? Like it was a very bizarre decision he needs. You know what? He needs to sue himself for defamation, for posting those.
Seriously, Cady's cool guy.
Kev, we need a drink after you. It's a Manhattan with Malibu and it thinks it's a Gossling.
All right. My cool Trahant is Spotify because they invented radio. So they have invented a way for everyone to listen to podcasts live. Maybe people call in on the subway. Hot, fresh line. I don't know. But yeah, they I just love where we're at as a society that we just keep reinventing old things that we've talked about it with cable that's going on right now. They have at some point someone's going to be smart enough to bundle all the subscription services we have and then I'll buy just that from like a third party.
Yeah, Comcast or someone Verizon in like a year. People are going to be like, you know what? We love watching movies at home, but it's really fun to watch movies with a bunch of friends. So why don't we make like a giant screen and then people can all go watch it together? Yes.
So we just keep reinventing old things. We have radio is now back and radio is on the cool throne and Spotify is a way to go.
So there was a meeting, the big cat and I had like four years ago. I forget exactly who it was with, but it was like one of these tech companies, I think, and they were talking to us about doing like different stuff with part of my take with them. And they suggested what if we could do like a live element of the podcast where listeners could call in and actually, like, give you feedback and you could get their takes and talk to them.
And and we looked at each other and I looked over at them and he goes, did you just invent the radio?
Like, OK, yeah. Well, I it's I wish I had I mean, I do we do reinvent things on this show all the time, but it's just so funny when they like do the press release and no one just proofreading like, hey wait, I think this is radio and they actually threw in I'll give Spotify credit.
They threw in concerts too, because you can now listen to bands, play, live and maybe even go see them live.
You know, that's a concert. You know, be cool if they did that, like they took the concept that they invented right now, but they kind of made it micro centralized in different locations because like, if I'm in Washington, DC, I want to hear more talk about the football team or the capital. Yeah. If you're in Chicago, you hear about the Bears. Yes. And so maybe if they had a bunch of different podcasts that they had do this, I like them for each different city.
And then you could get even local advertisers to do like smaller deals. But it was more impactful because of the local market.
Here's an issue, though. Pfft, I was thinking about this. So they're like, hey, you can listen live to Joe Rogan, but what if you miss it live? They should be able to store it and then you should be able to download it like on your phone. And what are we going to call and then listen to it afterwards? Hmm.
Audio on demand.
OK, Galaxy Cast Post cast. Oh, I like that post. Tune in to our post later. I like it a lot. Alex Jones used to call it his retransmission. That sounds way cooler. Yes.
Jake, do you have a high school drop before we get to Dallas? Braden. Yeah. Hotseat is Bruce Arians. He got a tattoo of the Bucs winning the Super Bowl and the last time a coach got a tattoo of a championship. Well, I'm not going to say who I have respect. I want to protect my guys.
Wait, wait, wait. The last time a coach got a tattoo on the shoulder of a championship, that very same coach went overseas, dominated the Greek market, came back to New York and made the NCAA tournament in his very first year.
So that coach. Yep, that that's all famer. So it should be cool thrown. Yeah. Make his bust right now. Yeah, exactly.
So have him boss right now.
OK, good. Once I was Monceau. No seriously. Because it wasn't a joke the you're trying to get me killed. No that wasn't a joke. And that Cothran is Jim Nantz because it is Jim Nantz week next week final for the Masters plus Guerreiro for the storyline he's calling his alma mater in the final four Houston. Oh yeah.
So only Jake. Only Jake. That's cool. And yeah. But it's also going to be able to do that conflict impartially.
Jake, he has an award named after him called remember in my interview. No, I got ninth place in twenty eighteen in the gymnast's award. Yeah. Got it. You don't remember that. I do.
I know you don't know. I do. You know you looked it up because it is a fake award. I Neagle son won it. He, he was up there. Yeah. Well he didn't win it, he got sick and my other friend got first. Got it. Everyone does great though.
Top ten. Yeah. I mean you're ranked the end of the season. Yeah.
Everyone's great though when they expand the playoffs you still wouldn't make it but that's still good. Oh mean when they expand the playoffs to eight you still would be on the outside.
I still wouldn't make it but you'd be the first team out. You could be playing all debate. Yeah right. Right. Marshall deserved to be in the playoffs. Yeah. If I Naegele son got covid you would realize that's not nice.
No but Jake you just said that, that Jim Nance will be able to do it and partially because he has a trophy named after him.
Well, that just shows how credible, how impartial he is. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know about that reputation. I'm going to I'm going to keep an eagle eye Jim planted there.
Well now but everyone. Oh yeah. On the list I guess I was whether he made it he didn't make it. You're all great broadcasters so. Yeah. Up the good work. Yeah. You're the real MVP.
Yeah. Right. All right, let's get to our interview with Dallas. Braden talking some baseball.
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And now here's Dallas Braden.
Oh, OK. We now welcome on our good friend coworker. It is Dallas Braden. He once threw a no hitter. We all know that.
Dallas. What's that like?
I've never eaten a game with no hits. We don't have to go down this path again. Great to see you. I was going great to talk to you. Baseball is back on is Thursday. So let's talk some baseball. I have a very important question to start off. Fine.
How dead are the balls? Oh, not not as dead as you might think, man. I'm not not as dead as you might think. Well we've seen guys fist Giannis out, you know what I mean. We've seen some some like what the how did that ball creep out sort of moments as well. But it's in Arizona so the ball flies. Those are the games I'm watching. Florida maybe not so much but but nonetheless. But that is something to pay attention to because the reason spring training might not give you a lot of information there is because those balls back.
At times, be a mixed bag, if you will, a mixed Satullo balls that they're thrown out.
Do you think that they kind of do some AB testing during spring spring training where they know which balls are juiced, which ones are and they kind of monitor those are there are conversations about that PFG, but there's no body that's going to like going to raise their hand and be like, yeah, that's going on because we've had we've had conversations where folks have come out and outright just completely denied the idea that any sort of tampering of any kind could be going on with balls.
Right. Like who who can't just raise their hand to be like, yeah, I was I was touching the ball. So I was like, yeah, so.
All right. So the balls might not be a big deal. I've heard it somewhere around, like you would take about five feet off of every home run.
So. Yes. So that that seems like it will over a long season will obviously change it a little bit. What about the other ball question I have? What about these humidors that there's like so some teams have the humidors and apparently there's some more humidors that have been installed in different stadiums. And for people who don't follow baseball or know what what what's going on, essentially some stadiums, there's five stadiums that we don't even know. They have humidors we know like Arizona and Colorado do, and it takes some moisture out of the ball or keeps the moisture in the ball, deadens the ball.
Where the hell are these humidors, Dallas? I mean, these things are like under lock and key, right? Like same sort of like like Federal Reserve type security. Can't let any tampering of any sort going on. So just like, you know, just like you or I, you know, you're trying to keep track of who's touch and whose balls they got those things monitored 24/7. You're not just you know, they're not letting just any old Tom, Dick and Harry get get near those balls.
So they've got those things stored away. People are watching those things. Right. Right.
But I think the cat's asking is, which teams are the ones. Yeah, I've I'm not not like where do they keep him?
Like Fort Knox buried underneath? Is it because if I'm looking down the list of highest altitude stadiums, you've got the Rockies, Diamondbacks, then after them, braves, royals, twins, pirates, when it makes sense that the highest altitude stadiums have them.
So twins have one. There are some teams that we know have them, but there's also some new ones that we don't know, only baseball. This is why baseball like the fact that we're even having this conversation like, hey, they changed the ball. Could you imagine going into a football or basketball season and being like, we think they changed the thing that they play with, but we don't actually look at what they did? Look look at what they did with cheapy one, too.
I mean, they they crucified that individual as well as some other ball fondler. Right. And then he got in like lives were changed forever when that happened. So, like, yeah, you're right. Like baseball, like, it's odd that they can just sort of all willy nilly, like the ball tossing balls to and fro and really not have anybody to answer. Right.
When you pick up a ball, can you tell, like, right off the bat, like, yeah, this one's going to sail. Yeah, well, I mean, not necessarily. This one's going to sail. What you can tell right away is how like just how hard this is. And I guess actually we have to Yeah. To to a point that it's going to sail but more so how it's going to sail out of your hand and then you kind of know what that end result is going to be like if you can't control this thing, but you feel how hard it is, you feel the height of the laces, the width of the laces, like you feel all of that.
I did a thing. I actually interviewed a astrophysicists, Marysville's who out of the Oakland Coliseum and we tested multiple baseballs. And like I she she ran a test on me and I could grab the ball and I could identify, you know, what year it was from and that just because you grab it every day, you know what the difference is if you were to feel something for it.
Right. Can we do a headline grab? Because I want to get you to talk some percentages for us. So we're going to toss out the Oakland A's. So this does not involve the athletics out of the non Oakland A's teams in Major League Baseball. What percentage of them do you think have a pitcher who doctors the ball?
OK, doctors the baseball. Now, I would have to ask you to define just so I understand what parameters I'm working under here, what is what is doctor? Right. So I feel like we're overdue for a spitball scandal. That's something that hasn't happened in baseball in a while. So I'm talking spit. I'm talking like a little Vaseline. I'm talking a nail file. I'm talking a foreign substance that is knowingly being being used as contraband and kept on the pitcher's person.
Now, it gets kind of dicey when you're like, is that too much pine tar? Is there pine tar on like what is knuckles or whatever? I'm talking like it's got to be a big glob for pine tar to count. But at another foreign substance, what I put it this way, what percentage of non? Athletics pitchers in general, do you think are doctoring the ball in some way, shape or form? I would say probably somewhere in the north of 80 percent.
Oh, that's not so high.
Does baseball have a ball doctoring problem down in terms of in terms of guys that just like that would use pine tar or something of that nature? But in terms of guys who would even be in the realm of like nail file Vaseline type stuff, those are egregious offenses that you don't see today just because the game is watched and monitored to the extent that it is. But what you do to substitute that is if balls are scuffed, you know, a ball gets thrown in the dirt, whatever you do, your best if you can if you're somebody who knows how to use that stuff to try to get that baby back, because you do know how to control that.
That's adding a letter to the baseball. And now you can make that thing move in ways that they do like. You know what I mean? If you've already faced me twice and you know what my shit is doing, you know what it's looking like. And now I get a scuffed ball and I add eight, nine inches of movement to that in the seventh inning in a big spot, you're going, what the hell was that? And all it was, was the stuff.
My stuff is still terrible. It's just moving a lot more now. And you didn't expect that.
OK, so let's talk some teams. Let's talk some teams. I want to start with probably the most interesting team coming into this year because of their new ownership. It's the New York Mets. So Steve Cohen takes over. My question to you is, you talk to players, you talk to people around the league. How much does it change the perception of the Mets when it comes to free agents or guys wanted to go play there knowing that Steve Cohen has like people?
I think people don't fully grasp just how much more rich Steve Cohen is than everyone else. It's it's it's insane. It's like we joke like, oh, what does he do by a World Series? Well, yeah, he very well could because he has that much. He is double the money of the next guy. So how much does that change the perception of players and people around the league?
I think initially the shock value is there. You're excited about it. It's like, yo, uncle Moneybags is in the house. Let's start by letting all of these chickens up and passing out titties to everybody. Let's do that, Uncle Steve. And that's what you kind of have to wait to be seen now, right? Like windows, the window extension go down. Does that go down? How does that work out? Maybe Conforto as well. Like, how do they play this?
That's what you're waiting to see. So you can be excited about what the dude represents. Initially that's going to make some noise. But after the noise Collins has he kicked in? He does like what is their movement? What do we got? Show me. Right. And from there, that's where the money and the walking, the walk, talking, the talk. Put your money where your mouth is type of stuff gets answered and that's where we'll be able to reflect and go.
We were excited about that. But your boy couldn't even come up with the money to lock up Francisco Lindor. The dude could have been the face of the future, the face of the franchise. They couldn't figure that out. I thought Uncle Steve was supposed to be this guy, the savior. What happened? We'll be having that conversation if it doesn't happen. Yeah.
So around the league, how does that is there like an impact on players in general, like knowing that one of the richest people in America has now purchased a team? So there's more money that's going to be spent eventually, like is the level of competition baseball going to go up a little bit just knowing that free agent salaries are probably going to go up because you got Daddy Warbucks over here ready already shell out.
We'll do fifty and let's go. I mean, come on. Can we just put some can we get let's extend the league by two just so Mark Cuban could have something to do with the money in his ashtray. Let's do that. Yeah, let's get him involved as well. And you want to see what that like. It's going to be the tone Cuban ball, right? I mean, like that's what it's going to be. I would. I'm here for that.
Absolutely. But that's talking as a player who would love to see this money just get thrown around with these dudes. But yeah, to answer the question, it does change the perception initially because you're like, oh, did they just become a real player? You know, it's like that first time you walk in to test drive a car and you're like, you don't have to do that background check on your boy anymore, right? Yeah. Yeah.
No, I'm happy you brought up Mark Cuban. So this is to put it into perspective, Mark Cuban. Everyone thinks, oh, that's the rich guy, Steve Cohen. It's ten dollars billion more than him. Ten billion dollars more than Mark Cuban. That's insane. So it's laughable. Yeah. It's clearly going to change a lot of things, especially in the NFL. Now, in terms, you know, I would assume that like everyone's kind of line is it's the Dodgers to lose.
The Dodgers in the Padres are going to be a great race out west. The east you have, you know, the Mets in the Braves and maybe tossin, you know, the Nationals and then the central just sucks. I'll admit it. Like the central knows who's going to conquer Central. So give us. Yeah. The overall landscape, the NFL, as you see it. Well, I think you can. It did a great job of wrapping it all up when you hit the Dodgers and you hit the competition, that is them between the Padres.
That's a great new rivalry that has sort of taken the place of the Giants Dodgers without the Giants being as competitive as they are. So to know that that division is going to have some have some tension at some point. That's fun. That's exciting. And let's not forget, Gerard does a great job. My partner, I'm starting ninth grade, does a great job of pointing out that the Braves, like it was essentially the Braves and they blew it and handed it to the Dodgers.
And so that's what's going to be really exciting to watch as those teams right there, that division battle between the Braves and what are the what are the Mets going to do? Because I don't know that whatever the central turns out to be is going to be competitive enough to compete with any one of those two division winners. So from there, I do think the conversation starts with the Dodgers and very well could end with the Dodgers.
OK, so I have a take and I want you to judge it here because I give it to the Padres are electric. The Padres are a lot of fun to watch. Yes. Fernando Tatis Jr.. Yes, we're all excited about watching him. He hasn't even had essentially he's I think he's under 600 plate appearances in his career. Is there a chance he might not have a great season because people figure them out and it's the quote unquote, sophomore slump, even though it's his third year?
And is there a chance that happens and we maybe got a little bit ahead of ourselves with the hype? Well, that's there's there's always that chance. And that's what's going to be interesting about him, is to see what adjustments are made. Because what's cool and interesting about this dude and his adaptability is at one point in time last year or the year before, I believe, when he struggled to recall, he called his dad in light right from the beginning, but his dad in and they just start grinding in the living room, going to work, watching a game or two, and then locking in the adjustments that they probably made on the drive over from the airport.
And if he's got that kind of feel and that kind of adaptability, how does that come about? When and if he starts to struggle and to what extent does he start to struggle because the pressure to compete with the Dodgers is going to be very real. So on top of competing against the league that's making adjustments to him, he has to figure out how to divvy up that pressure and performance and create a balance for himself where he's now not relying, like, you know what I mean?
He's not trying to move that in. Right? Is he right? So so, yes, there's always that that slope you riding on, like that's the question is people like to give him too much money. Did they give him too much money to not really have an idea? And it's like, look, that dude's going to sell tickets and he has already showed you superstar capability. Now it's about sustainability. Right?
Right. What about what about the American League? Do you think that there's a chance that this year is the year where the Yankees will finally win that World Series get in the discussion of elite franchises? It's been a while since they've been there, been a while since they won.
It's actually the first decade and I think one hundred years that they didn't go to the World Series. It's crazy.
That's unfortunate. Yeah. I mean, right now they're you look at their little brother in this town right now, it's like the Mets. There's talk of the town.
Oh, they absolutely are. Yeah. The Yankees are going to be the rotten core of that apple if things continue to trend this way. I mean, they've got the whole team here, the strongest man in baseball, Luke Voight, he's got to go get him on this just because he's telling the Yankees, who quite literally that foot that we all know like this is how it goes. But look, Voight is carrying the club boys. It's got it's a it's a tough.
Come on. Yeah, I don't know. It's about health again for those dudes. And you hate to put it on that, but when you've got the behemoth's you have in the lineup and they've been the question marks, there's really like there's not much assessing to be done after that, in my opinion. Same can be said about the starting rotation, like Jericho Cruel. What's Divi going to look like? You know, like what are the guys after the Cy Young favorite look like?
And for me, it's just always going to be help with that lineup.
Always so in the al the Yankees, I think they're the presumptive favorite, the White Sox. It feels like this is going to be a year where they're going to make a lot of noise, although Eli's injury was that was insane that they even had him out there. I don't understand that. I actually want to say I want to say he won the trade because he knew that he was a detriment to himself in the field. But so and then there's a few others.
I mean, obviously, the Rays have played. They were in the World Series last year. Give us maybe like a dark horse team in the AFL that you could see making it a deep run in the playoffs.
Oh, a deep run in the playoffs. And you're talking about somebody like outside of the White Sox. And it's because. Because I think they the central I don't want to say pretty locked up or taking care, I mean, look, this might be a home to call. But there's no reason that the Oakland A's there's no reason at the Oakland A's o can make a run deeper into the postseason than they did last year. They're talking about the Astros being the division favorite.
That's fine, that's fine. Things have got a guy coming off hip. Surgery was just a platinum player, that's all that's about. Chatmon What else in the world could lead the league in home runs? Baseball, but the League Baseball could lead baseball in one month. And they've got a sneaky rotation right now. I mean, all they've got is a top prospect in A.J., but ready to step into the shoes of a guy named Mike Myers who's done nothing but deal for the Oakland A's.
So if they figure out a way to go, Mike finds out at home and have to compete at home then. But come on, guys, let's be real. Let's be real. This is stupid. You're going to be a bum on the Boston Sports book or not. Maybe stay tuned. Maybe I'm just saying just saying, OK, I do like that.
We have we've got you her analyst and you'll come on here every time, just unabashedly like the Oakland A's have a real shot at winning it all. I like that. I like everybody that has like you've got a great kid going out there in Oakland, but like never throw away that Homer ism. You should be a homer for life and don't apologize for it either.
You know what? I had the greatest homer of all time. Tell me that he loved what I did. Hawkinson Oh, I think he's a Jerry provice. Know who's the greatest homer to ever step into a booth. He truly is. Parkwood. Hogwood Just like just root for the White Sox so hard that it wasn't even close to the unbias, which actually look, I love that about baseball. I guess that when you watch, like, you know, the national game on Wednesday or Sunday, you can lose a little bit of that.
When you watch the playoffs, you lose a little bit of that where it's the guys who know your team and who are announcing your team all year.
And that's fun to watch. Don't sleep on the twins either. Don't sleep on the twins. Never do. Yeah, I mean, most of the cruise is, I believe, 1012 years old and still hitting 5000 foot home.
Like, just don't sleep. I and I will not sleep on the twins. What about the Brewers? What about our Milwaukee Brewers with Christian Yelich? Just please tell us that Christian theology is not going to win the home run derby this year.
Oh, he was hungry.
Oh, no, no, that's I don't know if you guys know this, but there's a conversation in baseball about Christian Yelich having to compete in the home run derby each and every year. And I don't even I don't know. I don't know what it's about. I'm not sure. But that's that's just something that like if Christian Yelich wakes up that day and his heart is still beating, they will rule him out to the batter's box just so he he's like it's like a Masters thing, like you win the jacket, your grandfather, then you get this thing.
You can play it for life if you want. It's kind of like that's how JLE has the Derby unluck now just be. I don't know what it is. I don't know what happened. They've we've already figured it out, though. If he ends up winning a home run derby, then then I'm just going to shave a little piece of ass, shave a little piece of my ass, are going to make a Chilean will eat it. We will literally eat as well.
Not be cannibals, not the hare. Yeah, no, no actual skins. Take a little razor and just say, I feel like it's getting good for us the way that I grew up in prison. They're going to my butthole.
Being a cannibal is not a problem for me. It's the shower, Armie Hammer. It's the actual eating of each other's asshole.
That would be a problem.
There should be no problem in the news. I'm sure there's a little excessive way. Just make a little blue. Not you'll be just fine. Jesus Christ.
Yeah, but when you put it that way, it sounds a little less appetizing.
Dallas, my last question about this baseball season. So they've kept a couple of the weird rules. I don't know how I feel about this.
So they they know university, but they have kept man on second to start extra innings in this. I love the seventh inning doubleheaders. What do you think about the man on second extra innings? I hate that. I think it's it's like almost like rec league softball. It's it's tough to swallow early on, no doubt. And I think if you're looking at it more from a like, it depends on which way of looking at it. Competition standpoint.
You understand what goes into building a nine inning game as a player, competing guys in the bullpen, stepping up, helping each other out, the starters stepping up and maybe carrying and doing an entire day's work, getting the bullpen arrest that that matters. And guys know how much that matters over the course of a long season to have those days get picked up by either the pen or the starter or guy goes off, hits three tanks and just carries the offensive load.
So that's that's great. But then when you get into those late innings, some like at the big league level, what happens is guys get sent down after they've pitched three innings in relief, four innings in relief. Right. They don't get sit down and you may never see that dude again, all because he pitched well in relief and eight up those innings. And now because you can't use him for the next three or four days, he goes down and now who knows what happens.
Maybe the next time he goes out in three and he gets banged up, God forbid something twinges. He doesn't feel right because he just went for the big leagues, got sit down because they had to play sixteen innings. They didn't have a chance to win this thing in the 10th, 11th, 12th, so on, so forth. So I can understand the business side trying to protect resources. I can also understand the players side, the competitive side.
Well, you know, we just built this nine inning ballgame, this ninth inning theater, and we're not about to just watch some slop to come in here and take a second and blow it because he wasn't ready. Like, no, that's bullshit. Right? So I can see it from both ways. But I want look, man, we're trying to speed up a game that doesn't have a clock, which held true. True. I love the seven inning double header.
I think that's great that there should be more doubleheaders. There should be a double header de give guys more, you know, give teams more often Sunday's Roman Sundays or even just have it in the middle of the week. Because I loved baseball in the middle of the week. That would be beautiful.
So they should do that with a Cubs fan and be like like, dude, it's in your DNA to not know what it's like to be able to play baseball at night for a certain day.
Baseball's the best Friday. He's late Friday afternoon at Wrigley is the greatest like thing you wore. It's it's not. I agree with you. I agree with you. But the A's played the second most big games behind the Cubs. Yeah. Yeah, what. Love it.
Give me your give me your top three for MVP and then also top three for Cy Young Men.
Like like l I think you got to talk about like. Yeah you've got to, you've got to talk about Mike Trout. I know it's like how far down the list is he going to go. There's no reason that he can't still be a guy. I know Alex Bergmann's a name that's been thrown around on National League. Why not move cadets by not another guy on his team to Bunger, why not a guy like one of the junior junior? And that's that's that's that's somebody that I'm paying attention to.
Ronald Pugna Jr., I like he's awesome. I like him a lot. Cy Young American League again, Gathercole, that's a great place to start. I know Tyler Glasshouses needs been kicked around. I think there's a lot of growth that would have to occur to him to be a serious consideration. Then you got to go with guys who I think are like stalwarts in that area, which are Giolito people in Imbibes. I mean, the dude who basically had the Cy Young walked up after his first start last year just addressing people, you know, why not was your college boy?
I think that dude is going to write some shit up this year if I'm being Frank.
And and maybe Trevor Bauer. That's a do the we're excited to see how that kind of pans out is a full season. Right.
And you, Darvish in who I think should have won the science last year for the Cubs now on the Padres in a park that he should be like killing it in.
So he's another guy really like him in snow by both those dudes. Yeah. What this does, it's interesting, too, because guys like that in situations like that, you wonder if there's a chance that those votes get taken from each other or if they compete so well that they start to cancel each other out, which you hate to see, which I'd love to see what that body of work looks like. If you're a baseball fan at the end of award season, it might kind of break your heart is like, well, shit, I wanted that guy, but.
So how does how does the fans returning impact the game? Because I think a lot of teams are going like five thousand, some are going 25 percent something and 50 percent in a stadium like I think probably the Rangers are one of the most right there. Fifty percent capacity right now, I believe.
I believe the Rangers are actually offering the fan experience where if you pay triple your price of season tickets, they'll let you play in the hip pocket of the player like you told me. So you can be right there. Who does that favor more? Is that favor the offense or the defense?
I also did it absolutely favors the home team because in baseball there's ebbs and flows, just like in football. You know, if your boys got the rock, it's about getting behind them. And that energy is a little different than it is. If it's a goal line stand, if you're in the red zone trying to make a stop, you know, those little pieces change. Same for baseball. And and this is like what you're going to see now, like the the Astros tour that happened last year.
Yeah, it's going to be different this year, man. It's going to be different this year because I don't care that it's 5000, 10000 fans, whatever. They're going to hear it. And they didn't hear it last year. And I hate to even bring that up for it to be a thing, but that's what we talk about, is the fan experience. How does that change? And it's odd that mediums are still, to this day flooded and getting more so in spring training about people that are like you.
I just can't wait to come to these Astros games. I can't wait for this.
Let off the hook last year. Yeah. You got to remind people, thank you for bringing that up. We need to do a better job as a podcast. And I think just as journalists in general in this conversation of reminding people that the Astros did not get their tour last year, and if you go to attend an Astros game, it would be important to remind the players of the integrity of the game that we love the game that we're custodians of, that we're charged with taking care of and ensuring the safety of for future generations.
It would be important to remind players about the integrity that's necessary to play that game as a keeper of the game.
Is your duty. My man is your duty. It is our duty.
Give us a final question. Give us a oh, actually, the robot question. U.S code AWOL on Roback dot com for twenty percent off your first purchase.
Are he a a.k.a. doc. And for you Dallas, we have a Roback performance cusip that we will send to you. So we'll make sure that gets you roback dotcom use code. I give us your World Series and your champion and you can't use the A's. Oh, man, I can't use the eggs, I can't use the eggs, but we'll say the A's are going to win the World Series, they're that set. Now, give us the what would happen if the A's didn't win the World Series?
Who would be in it and who would win it? I think it's going to be the Dodgers again and. I mean, I mean, I don't know if I'm ready for doing the predictions, we're doing our predictions in a day and a half, so this is subject to change. It can't be held completely to this right now. But I believe the Dodgers are going to be there. I believe the White Sox are a team. Oh, that is is being strongly considered.
I just I, I feel like they can handle business in their division. I like and I just like other Bill, all right, and you give me one tasty future, just like on the outside looking in. Oh, look, everything goes right for this team. You could see them making around. Oh, I mean, like you would have to like, I don't know how. Oh, oh. I mean, I think that would be the Padres.
Yeah. Yeah. And they're fun to root for. Yes. Yes.
Yeah. I think that's I think that's a tasty future right there because they got to compete against those boys in blue and they've got to get past Atlanta if that's going to be a thing. And Atlanta was going to be the other tasty. But I feel like San Diego like Slam Diego is a little tastier.
I just like saying, yes, I love Art Dallas.
Thank you. Ever go subscriber's starting nine. It is a fantastic baseball podcast's. Baseball season is back. You'll see Dallas and hear from him all the time. Thank you, Dallas, and congrats again on that no hitter.
Dude, I've never. I don't know. Thank you. Thank you. If you need something signed, I can get that to you. But I'm not a not a big no hitter. I don't collect those. Those.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, right. Yeah, right.
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OK, let's wrap up. We got some fake news to send you on your way.
Late night show Henck Billy, all right, got some good ones today. Oh, OK. I mean, that's why they're always good ones. We got some great ones. There are special people. Yeah, we do.
Hi, my name is Joey. And my question is, if Billy and Big Cat Joey and pfft and Billy had a kid whose kid would beat the other kid up.
Hmm. OK, well I don't if we're going off of well we would because it's Billy's kid so we would be going off of Billy's measure for beating up our Billy.
My kid would be taller than Billy.
And you don't know that I might be a late bloomer. Big cat. I would say that's almost guaranteed.
So, Billy, according to your rules, the taller the person, the the guaranteed you see as fast twitch muscle.
I do. I'm very fast twitch. Billy, I noticed something, by the way. I noticed that you haven't called out, for instance, in the ganu yet.
Still what. That's a death sentence. So are you for your hands. Your.
Yeah, my my hands are legal but they're not that good yet.
So wait, wait, wait. Your hands are legal. I thought they were I that guy you're walking back now. He's a monster.
So you're not calling him out? No, not at all. So you think he's strictly not fighting actual fighters?
I know I'm not a real fight. Yeah.
So you definitely wouldn't call him out. No.
So what you said to me yesterday, when you're like, I think he's kind of a pussy, you know, I never said that that guy I would fight for the sand mine.
If you if they've paid enough money, I would fight him. No. OK, all right. Cool. All right. So I just want to make sure the record straight.
Hey, Bug Cat and pfft, caterpiller.
When's the last time you guys were stung by a bee slash wasp slash hornet slash mosquito?
Also, can I get a power ranking on those for big come up for the mosquito being lumped in there with the bee in the Hornet. Yeah, not not even close to a single Hornet like actually you know what, a mosquito is the most deadly. Yeah. Animal on earth. Well, no diarrhea trebly but they get where do they get the diarrhea.
The that's malaria. They get, yeah, malaria rises, diarrhea, it is like you got original covid, the stop, stop and sports, what was we used to like not be able to practice sports because of Tripoli, which Tripoli mosquito.
Oh, that's a nice thing. Yeah, that's. Yeah. What is Tripoli.
I mean there was like like a mosquito virus, West Nile, something.
No, it was a thing in mass if at church if there was enough reported Tripoli around Tripoli, Tripoli, we couldn't practice outside after like four o'clock.
Yeah. Two reported cases.
It was like diers Eastern Equine and SIFF encephalomyelitis.
Inseparate is so OK. It's been a long time so I've been stung by Borna.
Yeah. So I think it's been probably like 15 years. I tend to avoid things that have stingers. That's just a good rule of thumb in life. I would go mosquito number one because as we mentioned, they do kill like mass murderers. It's a slaughter out here I go, mosquito one, horn it to be three.
I'm currently dealing with a big problem because my son is just a chrome factory.
So I'm dealing with I haven't been around a haunted or been a long time, but yes, no, they're little pussycats. I kill with my hands. Not to say I'm like strong and tough, but like I've killed probably 300 ants this week with my fingers. You know, I am that tough.
Take them, rescue them. Get a little ant farm show. No, the problem is it's a total smart ants. Really hard for me because my son causes the crumbs for the ants. But also, I can't get, like, the real ant traps because he would try to eat it and that would be a problem as well. We should send just a bunch of cookies and things that are crumbly to Bryson DeChambeau.
Mm. Yeah. Ants. Everyone will piggy back off that. This question is for dad cat dad to dad. What's your favorite episode of Blooey.
Oh, mine is the one where they go camping and she meets Jean-Luc.
I like camping. I like the robot dad robot dad's an awesome episode you guys. You actually watch Blue just to watch it. It's actually that is it one of those shows where if you got really high and turned it on like as an adult you would enjoy it.
Oh yeah. I think I'm saying you don't have to get high to enjoy it. I'm saying I would prefer to get drunk guy mode for a second, say just enjoy something for fun, have fun with something I don't know.
Enjoy Life series. Yeah. All right. Well this kind of piggy off of that, when can we expect review season to start all the King of Kong, Fistful of quarters and garbage picking field goal kicker that typically starts right after right after March Madness, right?
No, it starts right after we all sports shut down and there's a pandemic because that's the only time we've done it for real. So, yeah, whenever the next pandemic happens, we will start to know. We did it over the summer with Rosillo that one time.
What what what did we find? It was fire fest. Yeah. Yeah, that's right. Fireworks. Yeah.
If there's like if there are certain phenomenons then we'll probably review it. But yeah it's not. That was a pandemic thing. The at least the garbage Keker was definitely pandemic.
It was for sure. Yes of course. I was thinking I would review the the Netflix documentary about the admissions scandal.
I just started thing. I started the EF1 documentary. Everyone says it's good.
Oh we going to become EF1 guys. A lot of a lot of hubbub going around.
I fell asleep halfway through the first signs, so it's great.
That's like being that that that biking the steroid biking one. What's it called? Ikarus. Yes, I snoozed. I was fascinated.
Yeah I know. Like won awards and shit.
Yeah I slept. Yeah. Anything anyone says everyone's so good. Like I'm, I'm going to, I'm going to see it through.
Yeah. You know what, honestly, if we just talked about F1 on this podcast we would seem so classy. Yeah. No I'm down to get in on F1.
I read that whole blog that Logan posted.
I was like at this actually might be interested. I don't actually want to get in on it. I just want to I want to talk about it so that it seems like we're cool, that we maybe we're Mercedes adjacent.
It's it's a this league like OK, like big time drama like this league. So that's why I want to get on it.
King Kong. Godzilla what.
To review the movie that just came out and it's coming out when they say if you can bloody figure out ways to get us to buy him movies at home. Yeah. If we review the new Avengers it's twenty dollars HD. Should we all do that as a project.
Maybe we should do predict. We should, probably shouldn't.
We should probably do one Avengers and then we should do an Avengers while also drinking Coors Light.
So we'll have to put that on the tab as well.
We should. We should do predictions. For what. For Godzilla. King Kong. OK, the Godzilla.
I'll go to chomper. I'll go King Kong. Well, what are the odds? Give me the odds on Godzilla. It's got to be the heavy favorite.
I feel like I fucking won the last King Kong can make tabbing Kong one, but Godzilla just swam away. So that's a wing for King Kong.
Not who won, who won King Kong, who won the one before that, well, it was just the one 19 like 54.
Oh, that's the only one. Yeah, there's all they're going to use some lame ass tie. Then I say tie. I'll take I'll take a tie in regulation.
I like that Martha is going to come in and just land on him and smother cast one thousand. Do you honestly believe that he is done making oral jokes? No, I haven't.
To my credit, I haven't made that many oral Joe. No, I did like three of them, though. Most of them are not. Yeah. There you go.
What is more important for the ideal male physique, mass or girth? Billy, disability question. We'll let you go with it. Len, he's thinking about skill. What you don't believe.
Then ask Gerth, did mass or are you doing the whole like it's not the it's it's the motion of the ocean, not the size of the wave. Yeah, it's in the hips. OK, yeah. Massacre that that shit is a lie that people.
No seriously. I don't know who started it but that's a lie. It's a massive girth. Billy, when you go with mass.
Hmm. OK, all right.
What was everyone's first car.
It was a nineteen ninety three Chevy Astro man that I owned.
I think it was, it was a Dodge Caravan purple terrible car. And then I had Avalon for a very long time that I love very dearly.
I was running through my list of vans that I went through as a kid. I honestly I legitimately drove six vans. Why is that drug? I moved to drive a van. I think it's a poor guy move. What course?
It's a drug that's like the it's heavy weight, right. A moving weight. Right. A movie in the seventies through like 2000 miles away wasn't a big time wait.
Come on. I had a I had it. This van is rocking. Don't come a knocking for three years when I was a virgin. Nice.
I was such a flex. The help or hurt.
I just said I was a virgin for three years after I put that sign up. So yeah.
No, it definitely helped handjob Kingo the last one having a cat and you to listen to myself.
Can we expect more episodes like The Life episode with Titus and Rosillo, the interview with Andrew Hawkins a couple of months back and a similar vibe and reminded me of how compelling that can be.
Sure. Yeah, I mean, the problem is we discussed our entire lives in the last one, so I'm going to have to go back and maybe psychoanalyze Billy the next one, actually.
Yeah, we should do a Billy, Billy, Billy, Jake and Bubba's life.
And we can just give you guys we could tell you guys how stupid or smart you are spending on the person grades, lives, smart, stupid. No one knows who I pointed to there.
I think they have a pretty good idea. All right. Let's do let's do numbers. Is that it? Hey, yeah. 1981, thirty eight thirty two point eighty five. Sixty five. 31. Forty seven. I'm Jake Tapper for hundreds kurylenko. Oh, yeah, shout out AK 47, January 17th and February 4th.
I remember it well. It's his birthday shout out.
What's up? Sorry, fourth or seventeen television. I love you guys. Love you guys.
Most dangerous animals in the world talking to a lot of news to see city. Today is a day to find shying away on the love of shying away from your lover. Take on me. Take me out of your. Needless to say, on Saturday. Sparboe, St. Petersburg. So they say to me, it's the better safe than sorry. It's the way to the safe zone, Takamine say. Odigo. Carl Sagan. Just. You got to.
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