Hey, what's up, guys, it's big cat. Before you start listening to this episode, I want to let you know that we're running a special sale on all bar stool merch, go to store barstool sports, dotcom and use code podcast for 10 percent off, go to store barstool sports, dotcom and use code podcast for 10 percent off.

On today's part of my take, we have week 15 recap fastest two minutes, Baby Brawne of the Week whose back of the week football guy, the week college football rankings everything. It is a jam packed Monday, part of my take after a weekend full of football, football, football.

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December. Monday, December 21st, 21st is which is it the longest day, let us be the first to wish you happy days or get a happy sun shortest day ever.

We typically average size. We start on Saturday in Mile High where Josh Allen Iverson has the answer to the question. When did the Bowl Bill's last win the AFC East title 24 hours ago.

Boom has the Sean Doug McDermott coach Bill seemingly can't miss Vick only fandangos is making John Elway pay for picking him and the bills offense is global warming up at the right time of the year. Relying on Diggs and Cole as a Chilean Broncos defense was only a minor inconvenience. Getting buried for forty eight points.

And I am happy to report that no one's circling the wagons like the Buffalo Bills. The Bills win the AFC East.

Forty eight Broncos nineteen down to Hottelet off wear. Stop me if you've heard this before, but Matt Ryan was up big on Tom Brady, only to have the L.A. Falcons and Raheem Morrissette below it yet again. Isn't it ironic Tom Brady kept one hand in the pocket and the other Zeena avocado throwing a jagged little pill and a true old fashion, tried to kiss Brown after a late touchdown score. The Falcons are going down annotator like Abraham Lincoln, because if you're an Atlanta fan girl, Coco Curl Curl.

Oh, no, no, that no ladies ever safe box derby one Karate March 27 to Indianapolis where de forest come Buckner and Lieutenant Dan Acho Autry took out Deshaun Watson, his legs for four and a half sacks, aiding the Colts defense to a victory. Zach Pascal Suhakam was able to dunk two touchdowns into the end zone as Philip Seymour Hoffman Rivers was. Red Dragon is nuts across the Texans secondary, the Colts take down the Texans twenty seven twenty. Someone put Deshaun Watson in a safe house in Nashville where Marvin Cronje Junior got shit on by Corey Dade IBS as the Titans rectum traktor seeto leave you in the dust like you a Cheetos Wintour's bladder like a mosquito still can play up and read though the Titans roar the Lions foreigners start parking lot up north to Minneapolis where Michaelangelo's David Montgomery made the Vikings Dean look small.

I want my.

I want my. I want my true Besuki as Darnell Mooney money for nothing in a Chemex for free. Put the Vikings playoff chances in dire straights. All we are is just in the win. Jefferson yelled at Kirk Cousins to throw the fucking ball Kirk after Kirk closed his eyes for the moment, only for a moment. And the moments gone. Uibo Boy Blue. I thought Trey Wingo left ESPN. The Bears take down the Vikings. Thirty three. Twenty seven.

The people in the studio are too young to understand how genius our Dire Straights song drop once they're in la la land.

Carmelo Anthony Akers was upstaged by Braxton honey, not Berríos. And frankly, my gawd, I don't give a damn case as I hope for Trevor Lawrence are gone with the Wind. They only one pick and New York wins by Bryce Hall as the time for the judge to make that number one selection as tick tock tick away and these rams are bad. Twenty three the Rams twenty good.

What boom. Oh oh oh oh oh oh.

Down in Miami where cousins Sal von Ahmed broke his podcast Partners Heart with a nail in the coffin for Bill Simmons. Belichick in the Patriots playoff chances in the words of my good friend Smokey Robinson. Let me be the last to wish you all a happy Shanika as Jua Tagliabue and that Bravo, Bravo, Bravo got the Dolphins to their ninth win of the season. Dolphins twenty two. Patriots twelve. Standing on a corner, Jameis Winston got thrown out such a sad sight to see give him his space, it's time to compare it to the Saints need McSorley.

Come on, J. They missed the dogs are tasteless, the chiefs are under my skin. As the trees take down the seats, thirty to twenty nine NBA finals in the nation's capital where the Joe Logan Thomas experience was a good one. Christmas Carol gave the football team fa la la la. Los Haskins tried to take off, take the top off as the football team's offense pulled on Titanic, saying, Treat me like one of your French girls.

And the Seahawks win a big one. Twenty five game.

That was the fastest two minutes in sports presented by the Fitness Membership Services provided 24/7 personalized insight that makes it the perfect tool to help you train for whatever you have going on in your life. We recorded the segment using the live feature in the app, so check out our Instagram to see one of the many ways WOOP gives members features so they can help them better understand their bodies.

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OK, week fifteen in the books. Sunday Night Football. How did it go for the New York Giants. Well Freddie Kitchens is trending on Twitter.

That cannot be good. The Giants baffling would say, I would say baffling plan. And the the Browns looked good. Baker looked good. The Browns now have ten wins. They're on their way to the playoffs. If they can just give it to Cody Parker. But the Giants, I think that's it for them. Nice run. But what the fuck were they doing?

No, they're not out of it yet. Right. But they would, but true. But it was it was an ass kicking.

Like if you can't call yourself a playoff team and go out there and the fake field goal, what was.

Yeah, it was Joe Judge campaigning for Coach of the year. What was that? Two things. So, one, I think Joe Judge wanted to put something special out there for the people watching on primetime.

And two, I think he was playing on tilt a little bit. The old rivalry back to high school with Stefanski Stefanski actually beat George out to be the starting quarterback of their high school. And then Joe Judge transferred Roberts. So like it was this was personal. He was like trying to settle like in Joe Judge's mind. This is the the culminating scene in like a high school sex comedy. Right. Right. He finally gets to come back and avenge his loss.

But it was it was baffling. It was a weird play. The play actually could have worked because the dude was kind of open.

But I don't understand why you don't just keep your own offense on the field and just run your own offense.

Yeah. Instead of being like, hey, let's check them, but not trick them by having all these guys out here. Joe Judge said afterwards field goals weren't going to win this game.

Well, OK, maybe, but you would have been down thirteen to nine and half instead of thirteen to three.

So I don't know, field goals would have gotten you in a spot to win the game. They would hurt, right? Like you would have you would have been in in distance at the end of the half like it instead. It was a ten point game which felt like too much for that offense. But you basically gave up you gave up a field goal with that stupid play to start the game and you gave it up again when you went for it on fourth and two, like the five yard line.

Yeah, I feel like Joe Judge saw Freddie kitchens and was like, you control the offense. So I think we have a better chance of scoring a touchdown if I put my special teams right and where I can dictate the play right. As opposed to running one of your shitty plays. Freddy Baker was really, really good, though.

He's he's starting to like I feel like he's turned a little bit of a corner where he sees everything. Twenty seven for thirty two point four for almost three hundred yards. He was awesome. And why Teller wasn't even playing and they got lost their guard like on the first drive. So they were playing. They're, they're like six round pick at guard. Browns are for real man. The Browns are for real. These Browns could win two playoff games.

These Browns aren't the Super Bowl Browns.

The Browns are for real. And guess what the Cleveland Browns are now. I'm, you know, the playoff picture better than me. I'm worried. OK, what I'm what the Browns. Well, Kody Parker is going to ruin your life. Browns fans. The Browns should make the playoffs right in a just world. The Browns should have already clinched at ten.

And for however, that is so crazy that they however, that is so fucked up in the AFC and Cleveland Browns fans turned this off.

Not that you've you've probably already run through all these scenarios in your head, but the Ravens are probably going to win their last two games.

We put the Browns play the Jets. So that's a win. That's when the Jets are coming off of a win. That's a letdown spot for. Yeah, yeah. This is a this is a trap game for the Jets. That is the. That's for. Yeah, I love it and yes, the Ravens are going to get to 11 and five, the Colts are probably going to get to 11 and five. The Titans are probably going to get to 11 and five also.

OK, so then things can get a little dicey. OK, but what gets dicey there?

Well, the fact that the Browns would have to play the Pittsburgh Steelers in week 17 and probably had that game flexed into primetime and probably have that game, could they if they win that game, could they win the North?

I don't think so. I don't think so. I don't think they have the tiebreakers. So are you saying that there's a way that the Browns could miss the playoffs at 11 and five?

Is that what I'm hearing you say? There is the Browns, I think could win the AFC North. No, they can't. No, no, no.

It's it's a possibility, OK? It's very, very unlikely, OK? It's a possibility. But all I'm saying is like that just it feels bad. It feels like a setup. If going into week 17, they flex that game into prime time.

The Browns win 11 games and don't make the playoffs. That will be the cruelest thing that's ever happened. Yeah, that can't twenty twenty just end already. Oh my God. I'm looking at it now. Yeah. If all, if, if all three teams finish 11 and are all four teams finish eleven and five.

Yeah. The Browns would miss the playoffs.

If you're, if you're a fan of Faulk dude you kind of have to be rooting for the Giants to not take this loss too badly so that they can maybe go out there and be like shocked the Ravens next week.

But what the fuck? And all this we're just. Why did you say that?

I'm I'm just pointing things. It's the math because it's not me. I don't control the numbers yet. But the way things stand right now and this is presuming that the the Steelers beat the Bengals, I think that's actually I think.

All right. So now I'm starting to get a little bit of an understanding of this situation. I think if you're a Browns fan, you want the Steelers to win their next two games, makes that makes them in the playoffs during the playoffs. They can't. They won the AFC North. They can't change where they're playing. They're going to wrest the starters. Then you can win in week seventeen.

Do you think that Ben Roethlisberger might be like a little bit hungry to go out there and claim his like I'm the guy?

Cleveland don't think they'll even. I think they'll be like, Ben, you can't play.

They'll tell you what they'll tell Ben the game's on Monday or just tell him that it's in Pittsburgh and have to realize it.

All right. All right. So the Browns great win, but. Yeah, and and for God damn it, that's scary. Tonight, the Browns look good. The Browns should be in the playoffs. They probably should and they probably will. But you know what we need to change the playoffs is the Browns at eleven and five.

They'll be the cruelest thing that's ever happened, be the Cleveland Browns rule. Yeah, yeah. We're like one team that hasn't made the playoffs in a long time. If you get double digit wins, if you haven't if you haven't made the playoffs in longer than ten years and you have a ten win season, you should get in.

Yes. Yes, I agree. And then. Yeah, Joe Judge, I don't know what the fuck Stefanski should be coach of the year, I think. Yeah, right. Stefanski, McDermitt, Tomlin kind of out Tomter out front for us maybe.

So there's the three but I'm going to go Stefanski you got to fucking Cleveland Browns to ten wins.

Kevin Stefanski gets my vote that I don't have but I'm going to say it anyway. He gets my vote. He gets this podcast vote for Coach of the Year. Yep. We've officially it's like The New York Times getting behind a presidential candidate. The part my tape, what they did to this year.

They did. Yeah. So I'm sure due to part of my take as a podcast is getting behind Kevin Stefanski as coach of the year. OK, well, Kevin Stefanski and then alternate shot, no offense there in case Kevin Stefanski should happen to not be able to fulfill his obligations.

Billy, why did you why did you just walk in? It's it's twelve thirty at night. Why are you with a bunch of people. It I don't know why Billy would ever bring food in here when we have never.

He's got to put on you. Order enough for all of us.

Yes. Oh thank you. Oh fuck. Yeah. Hey I got a couple party packs. Let's go eat some Taco Bell fuck. Yeah. All right.

Well let's do the week. Fifteen too because we already recorded all week fifteen. Here is week fifteen.

This is the best way to end a football weekend. Yeah, a little Taco Bell nightcap. This meal. No way is this going to backfire.

Eating Taco Bell twelve thirty in the morning, eat seven tacos and then go home and fall asleep comfortably.

All right, let's get to the rest of the week. Fifteen slate. We're going to start with Saturday. Can I just interrupt you real quick? Yeah. I love football like this weekend. Watch football weekend. And football is it's the best sitting on the couch for an entire weekend and doing nothing but football. It was this is heaven.

The only. The only. Complaint I have is not really a complaint, but it's more of like, hey, remember to take care of your chickens, take care of your mentals.

I had a definite football headache of just watching the screen for, I don't know, twenty four hours over the last three days. Just make sure, you know, popping Advil every now and then. Yeah. Or just close your eyes and close your eyes.

We'll take a break when I will decide at halftime for about 30 seconds. Sometimes I like to just stare at the ceiling and give my eyes the old reset on that. Yup, yup.

Go outside for a minute.

Got to take care of something. Do something. All right, let's get into it. So Saturday, Saturday, Saturday, Saturday.

The Buffalo Bills are AFC East champions, the first time in twenty five years. 1995 was the last time it's been so long that twenty nine players on the Bills roster, including practice squad, were not born yet. The last time the Buffalo Bills won the AFC East. We're so happy for Josh Allen. He's fucking awesome. Josh Allen needs four more touchdowns in the last two weeks to break the record for touchdowns by bills QB, which this is actually like a real record because Jim Kelly's offenses were revolutionary.

They were as close to like mid 2000s offenses as that as it got in the 80s and 90s. Right, exactly.

So it's it's not you know, it's not a nothing thing. He has been incredible. Think about this. The bills are Kalamurina Hail Hail Mary away from being twelve and two right now.

Yeah, no, the bills fuck. And Josh Allen Fox and this disbelieves team could win the Super Bowl. And I was like those Browns from a couple of weeks ago could win the Super Bowl.

The team that we've seen from the bills in the last two weeks, they could beat the Chiefs in the playoffs. Yes. If everything goes correctly, like their defense is good enough, Josh Allen is fucking hard enough. Like the windows that he was putting the ball in were incredible. And he's like, he is one guy I know we had Mike Leach on the show like a couple of years ago, and he was telling us that you can't get more accurate after your, what, like seventeen, eighteen years old.

Just picocuries Josh Allen. I think Josh Allen might be younger than we think he is. Well, it's like a reverse Dominican baseball. It's Benjamin Button. Yeah. Right. Yeah. How he ages backwards. Yeah. So he's going to get more accurate as this guy and then he's going to be a toddler and then he's going to be a toddler. But hopefully we can get some titles out of it first.

But like when, when they put the videos up of Josh Allen going back to Buffalo and the entire team landing and the entire city of Buffalo greeted them at the airport, giving off major like dogs, greeting military people coming home from there towards Awesomes. It was it was incredible. It was like Buffalo is going to be like Woodstock 99 if the bills do work in the place.

And Cuomo said that they could potentially have some fans in the stands for the playoff wait, which Fratto said Fratto said that we don't say Frido Chromeo.

So this is sometimes there is stating the obvious, but sometimes stating the obvious is still needed because you got to give credit where credit is due. And I think Brandon being who we've had on the show, Sean McDermott, who is a great, great head coach, but the the Bills front office, like you draft a quarterback.

There was a lot of people who thought, Josh, I would suck. Josh Allen has been fantastic. But more than that, they have put Josh Allen in a spot to succeed. And I'm talking about the Stefon Diggs straight. That trade changed what the bills trajectory is. And it is the rare trade in sports where both teams won because the Vikings got Justin Jefferson out of it. So they have their, you know, stud wide receiver, the future.

But Stefon Diggs has six or more receptions in all but one single game this year. On Saturday. On Saturday, he had eleven catches for one hundred or sorry, this season he has one hundred and eleven catches for thirteen hundred yards like he has unlocked Josh Allen. And again, it is stating the obvious. But a lot of times franchises don't do these things where they say, hey, we've invested in this quarterback, we have him on his rookie deal.

Let's get some guys around him who can be the perfect complement to what his skill set is, which is a Stefon Diggs and the deep ball catches and being able to run under the ball. And it just needs to be said, because a lot of franchises don't do those smart things the bills have. And they deserve all the credit in the world because Josh Allen has been phenomenal. Diggs has been phenomenal. Cole Beasley Beasley's been phenomenal. That defense has turned itself around like the the bills defense was the issue.

And which is weird because last year they were unbelievable. But after the bye week, they figured it out. They have figured something out where they they they play good enough defense that this, like you said, is a Super Bowl contending team. And guess what? They went to Denver, which could have been a letdown spot because everyone's talking about them.

And they annihilated the and it was on a weird Saturday to. Yeah. Which is another place like a relatively short week. Could all. Will be another letdown spot and a T-shirt and hacking, which I love that song. Yeah, that's true. Not to have a T-shirt and jacket. Yeah. So so they come back there. They're AFC's champions. And we've seen I don't know if you've seen the screenshots, but there's some screenshots going around from people that work inside.

What's the name of the Buffalo Stadium. They have a name.

You know, it's new, but it is Bill Stadium, the Blue Jays Stadium. It we've we've had talks about having it be the barstools.

Yeah. So there are people that work there that are getting contacted saying, hey, would you be willing to like work concessions during the playoffs if we put in like this sort of protocol? And so they're planning on having fans there if he's going to be there. And Bill's mafia went fucking nuts on Saturday. Good for them. Like, great job for the bill's fans, being able to celebrate hard and go like, hey, I'm on a Saturday night knowing that they have a full day of recovery on Sunday.

Yes. You guys deserved it because all Buffalo would have called in sick had you clinched the AFC East and won that game on Sunday. This is, though, and I just keep going back to it.

But the fact that the Browns and the bills are both Browns most likely playoff bound without fans in the stands and fans partying beforehand, it is a little bit of a mini tragedy because those fan bases deserve it and Bills fans should be.

I mean, this has been a long time coming.

Obviously, they broke the streak to get to the playoffs a few years ago, but winning the Ashes first time in 25 years, young quarterback, franchise quarterback like that's Bills fans are waking up on Monday morning and they're just happy, like they're just straight up happy.

And that's such an awesome feeling. When your sports team can do that for you, there's this.

Why you it's why you go through the losses. Yep. There's been no better application of nature's healing than seeing bills fans jumping through tables, lighting them on fire, smashing like full twenty, twenty years on their heads. That's how I knew that. Like things things are on the right track world right now. So I'd also be remiss if I didn't mention that the Bills and the Broncos, that's the most successful OJ Simpson run game of all time. Nice big match up between the two of those.

A lot of history between those franchises.

Andrew Luck is done. We've got to be done with that. I'm opting out of Drew.

Yeah, no, but I'm not talking to you anymore. You've already emptied. I'm talking about the Broncos. The Broncos have to be done with that. Yeah. And unfortunately, I think Vic Fangio is probably going to get fired. I still would rank him number one defensive coordinator, so will have a job. It just didn't really work out for him. I mean, he he was never really meant to be a head coach.

And it sucks because they just don't have a quarterback.

And I still think that their roster is decent where they can turn it around somewhat. You know, I mean, like if you look at the Chargers and the Broncos, like there's teams out there where if you're a fan of that team, it's not you're not the Jets, you're not the Jaguars. Like there are moves that can be made that can get you back in the playoffs. I feel like in the next couple of years. Yeah.

Your defense is going to be good when Von Miller gets back in like you have offensively got offensive weapons. No offense is awesome. Yep. But again, he he does still feel to me like the second team he's on, he's going to be a fucking monster. He's gonna be like all world. He's going to be the next baby. Gronk Yes.

Yes. All right. So that was Saturday football, Saturday Night Football, the Packers and the Panthers, Rogers called it Aaron Rodgers called it a disappointing win to fucking asshole.

But it was a weird game because the Packers were up twenty one three. They scored, I think, on their first three drives. Aaron Rodgers wasn't that sharp. Their offense wasn't that sharp.

I think that he was like, hey, I can probably suck tonight knowing everyone's watching college football and I'll still win an MVP. That's just my thought. And Matt, rule point spread. God kicks the field goal on first down. Everyone is freaking out about it. It almost worked.

Yeah, no, I think it's it's kind of the right decision when you don't see a lot of coaches do it.

But it's kind of not because you still have first down. Right. And you can take it. It's harder to save time. It's harder to score the touchdown than the field goal.

So it's still like it ended up not looking dumb in retrospect, but I still think you need to at least run a play on first.

Second, because what I think if you score a touchdown, the first second down, then the hard part done, he was making up for it with Joey Slye sending Gisli out there to make a very makeable field goal towards the end of the game. Yeah, supposed to try him out there, which I think it's tough because you could see that going the other way where maybe they score a touchdown and then slide goes out there and they have to kick a sixty seven yards, which is what he is, which holds them backwards somehow.

But it's, it's a listen if you do it and like third down or fourth down I get it. But first down. What are you doing. Just fucking take two shots to the end zone.

You might have three bad snaps in a row. Right. But yeah, that was Matt Rule was the point spread God. And Teddy Bridgewater just keeps covering point spreads.

You bring up a good point, though, there in Rodgers. And maybe you weren't going down this road, but I'll just say it. When was the last time Aaron Rodgers was happy? Never has he been. No, I feel like his source of happiness is when the haters aren't happy. Yeah, no, he likes he's just a surly guy who likes to just not be happy, who likes to excel at football.

Yeah.

And just be like, you know, oh, it's disappointing when. OK, dude, like you're 11 and three. So disappointed we've had no season. But that was a disappointing one.

Whatever I, I still think the Packers can I'm excited for this Titans Packers game next week. Let's just say that.

So we're going to find out how soft the Packers is next week, because I don't think that they're as soft as they were. I think that they're gone a little bit harder. They're still kids, not the DMI. They've got to Semin right now.

They're one and two when the team was shoved up, according to that, SWAT teams, if they're going to get the one seed, most likely it's pretty much I mean, it's scary. You know what? There's basically no chance that they don't get the ones.

You're just hoping. No. In week seven. No, I'm just saying if they have the one foot off the gas. No, I've I've already done the math on that.

I'm no longer scared of the Bears playing on Sunday Night Football flexing because the Bears entire, like playoff chances rely on the Cardinals and they would never put a game in there that it could have already been done.

So I think that much like the bills are discussing putting certain fans into the stands, the Packers just need to have the first row of the endzone filled with people so that you can do a non sad Lambeau leap. Yeah. So just so that somebody can catch him, I like that.

I think Roger's also this will be like the I think this will be his third time going. Forty touchdowns plus single digit interceptions, which I think the only two other people have done it, Brady and Manning. So whatever he's good, that's fine.

So it'd be nice to be that consistent. I said something nice. It's because he throws it away a lot. He doesn't take chances. Well, Brett Favre was a guy tried to at least Brett Favre fucking went down with the ship. Aaron Rodgers experimented this year with taking charge. There was like one quarter where he experimented with taking chances and he had like to pick six. And then he was like, you know what? Fuck that. I'm not doing that ever again.

The I for some reason, someone retweeted on my timeline the Brett Favre was talking about his last game.

It was when Korey Wooten basically killed him on that frozen turf. Yeah. Soda. And I had never heard the story. But Brett Favre said he got knocked out. He was snoring. The trainer came and got him up. He tried to go to the wrong sideline. He then went to the right sideline. He got in his street clothes. He had a hot coach, is his words. He had hot cocoa and a chili dog, and that was it.

And he just knew it, that I'm done. Hot cocoa and chili dog. That's disgusting.

I might I might get one of those copper fit things that he advertises for my back because I'm into just strictly junk science treatments to my back for right now. Yeah. You just won't listen to me, even though I've not through every night, like, I'll do whatever I like. I'll go to witchdoctor. I don't really care. I like people call a doctor.

You're like, no, I don't want to do that.

I got it. I'm going to go to an acupuncturist. I'm going to do this too. I don't trust doctors.

So it's I mean, I don't I don't I've been reading a lot of editorials recently.

I don't I don't I think talking about I think doctors know I'll I'll inject the vaccine into myself. Mm hmm.

I know how to use a needle. I'll drink that thing from water phone. Oh, fuck the van. No problem. I'll I'll be can you can you take the vaccine rectally. Done. We'll find out. We'll have Billy do it to us.

Yeah. All right. Next up, Bux Falcons. Well this was just to be expected, right.

Yeah. The Falcons are up. Seventeen nothing. The Falcons are the Falcons. Tom Brady is Tom Brady. Tom Brady now has four career games.

Comeback wins when his team has been down seventeen plus in the first half at halftime and two most, most, most all time. And two of them are against Falcons won the Super Bowl. This was like as bad as the Bucs were the first half. That's how good they were in the second half. They scored on their first five possessions in the second half.

And you just expected this game because the Falcons of the Falcons and Tom Brady's Tom Brady. Yeah, this is the fourth game that the Falcons have had a 95 percent win probability and gone on to lose the game.

So they are mathematical proof that statistics aren't real. They've done it using statistics. We can now prove that stats are fake. Yes. Which is it's incredible. I just think that there's one guy that just he he feels like, OK, this feels like a ninety five percent game. And then he just puts he updates to ESPN.

Yeah, no, it's totally fake.

So my question from this game are the books fraud's you're saying that because of the first quarter.

First half. I was thinking about it. I feel like the Bucs just stink in the first quarter. No, no, it's it's not just on this game. The first half was very bad. It's also the fact that the Bucs, when they play bad defense, is they look OK and like they are going to now. So they play the Falcons next week. They play the Lions, then they play the Falcons again.

We're going have a three game stretch where the Bucs should look OK. And I'm saying fraud's. When they get to the playoffs like there, you can't go down 17 points against a good defense like you just can't. The Falcons are a broken team and I think the Bucs are relying on flipping the switch. And I feel like if you are, you could the chiefs could be a flip the switch team. Yeah, Tom Brady and the Patriots could be a flip the switch team, like teams that have done it can flip the switch.

The Bucs have not done it. So you can't be like, hey, we're going to flip the switch. It's almost like the Clippers. The Clippers spent the entire bowl being like, we're going to flip the switch. We've never flipped the switch. I feel like the ball which is in their box, could find the switch because they've got enough ingredients to have a switch. That's that. They've got they've got all the is all the Corvettes. Many Corvettes.

Yes. And not enough Jeep wranglers out there.

Here's a good sign that a team may be a fraud. This is like is like Jeff Foxworthy. You're Red Jeff Roseworthy. When the line that you hear constantly something I've said, something I've heard many people say are the Bucs have the most talented roster in the NFL.

When you say that over and over, that's essentially saying without saying what they suck. Right.

They are not reaching their ceiling. You're saying that they should be good, right? I like better on paper. The Bucs are the best team. Right. On paper, the game's not played on paper.

If you talk about how talented your roster is, there's a good chance that you aren't getting to the ceiling of your ability.

Right. It's not played on paper. It's played in the ESPN win probability chart. That's where that's where the games are really played. But they they do start slow. They're very slow start.

And I think that that's going to hurt them because they are not the chiefs. I think they're just the entire offense is just laughing for the first quarter. Looking over at Bruce Arians for the first time all week when he's wearing the full, like Hurt Locker bomb diffuser set up that he has. Yes, he's got the strap on and then he's got to the protective face shield all over him. He gets more accessories week in, week out. So it might take him a little bit to like, remember where all the different buttons are.

He has to learn a new system every single week. But I feel like the first quarter bucks are one of the worst teams in the NFL. I hate to look this up. So and then and then second, third quarter on, they get into the swing of things.

Here's so I'm going to say to you, here's almost to you. If the bears somehow do sneak into the playoffs and the Raiders don't, which are we expect the Raiders not to write? The Bucs will have finished the regular season going. And I'm going I'm going to assume they're going to win their last two games. The Bucs will finish the regular season going. I know they would have gone one in four, one in five against playoff teams and ten against non playoff teams.

I mean, that's something, right?

Yeah. No, they lost the Saints twice. They lost the bears, they lost the chiefs and they lost the Rams like the Packers. That thirty eight, ten Packers win is the only one you can look at. If we're doing the BCS, the Bucs are out.

Yeah. And I think that the Bucs probably I would not trust them to go on the road to a cold environment. Nope, they're warm weather. Tom Brady already said he's never moving back north. Right. He's staying. He likes to the hot weather down there. So I think, yeah, if they have to go outside in the cold, that's going to be tough for them. If they get to play a game in Tampa, then I think they can win that.

If they get to play in a dome, I think they like. Would you be surprised if the Bucs beat the Saints in the Superdome? I actually I would I would be shocked by it.

I would. I think it's a terrible matchup for them. You know what I really like, though? This game brought out the the old first down change. And there was another like first down controversy with the ball was definitely short of the marker. And some people are like, I don't like the fact that we use chains to measure distance in the NFL. It's a billion dollar league or whatever it is. I'm OK with it. I like I like having, like, a little bit of that weirdness where, yeah, the referee's going to be looking down and seeing if a link or human error.

Yeah. The human error, that chain system it would was a keep to leave announcing this. I know he was doing the Cardinals game because he was calling Kyler Murray calamari.

OK, I got it. But Aqib Talib would get PTSD from the chain system for sure. But I think that there's like there's something endearing about it. Yeah. Being like, look at these old men trying to I thought that the distance between the end of a football and a pole in the ground, it's kind of fun.

So the bucks will see. Matt Ryan still remains the most successful quarterback in the NFL. There was a couple of times where he just sacked himself. He's doing he's doing the Eli Manning now where he just kind of gives up.

I also our good friend, Stephen Shea, Bucks super fan, did have a tweet that I think we need to bring this saying back more. He said, the Bucs have no pass rushers in the first half. They need to start heating up the quarterback.

OK, yeah, I like that kind of heat up the corner in your ears back and heat up the quarter, beat up the quarterback. We got to have a couple of meetings at the quarterback.

Yeah, it's like a left. It's leftovers, leftover lasagna. We got to heat up this quarterback. Do you think, like, we haven't heard that much out of Antonio Brown. He's not going live on Instagram after games, which sucks. Scored a touchdown my favorite parts of the week he had. Yeah. Nice touch today, but I, I just keep feeling like we're we're overdue. He's. He's the Yellowstone Super Bowl. Oh, yeah, and we're overdue for just a catastrophic explosion.

Yeah. When the Bucs lose the playoffs, yep, we will get an Instagram live and it will be hilarious. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Next up, Niners Cowboys, not a whole lot from this game. Great color game. The the two uniforms just makes you look back. It felt like the 90s missed the 90s. But this game, weirdly, there was a lot of points. There was like 20 points in the last 90 seconds with that weird kickoff return and then Hail Mary.

But I think the biggest takeaway I had from this game, why two takeaways. One is Tony Pollard is a reason why if there's anyone out there, I don't even think there are these people exist anymore that you shouldn't pay a lot of money to a running back. Tony Pollard, is it? He's not Ezekiel Elliott, but what is he like? Seventy five percent. Five percent. And he wants to get paid like a million dollars.

It's like Cequent Barkley and Wayne Goldman. Yeah. So, like, yeah, you can get you can get most of the production out of it. But still, I will say, like, I'm definitely a prisoner of the moment all the time. I'm constantly trapped in a source of the current time that we're in and like, yeah, you've got to pay Dalvin Cook. You got like yes. Like I.

Well Kirk Cousins, that's also a combo deal with Kirk Cousins is your quarterback.

Then you do have to pay down and I'm fully prepared to be a million percent wrong in two years. When Dalvin Cook he regresses right to the point where yeah. We ran him into the ground like Larry Johnson. So turns out he's not worth the money and they're going to hamstring them with a cap for like years to come. But at the time with Ezekiel Elliott, it was like you got to pay Zeke. Yup. You got to feed him, you got to feed the guy.

But yeah, we're always proven wrong two years after that take.

So my other one was I think Kyle Shanahan should just keep subbing in and out. CJ Better.

Yes, Nickman. So I have stats to back it.

OK, when C.J. Batard or Nickman subs in for the other one, they are the sub sub sub. The sub, the sub. Subir, the yeah. The person who comes in sub is the sub. Yeah the sub and the person who leaves is a sub. B has been sub has been sub.

So the person who comes in is fifty four for eighty sixty eight percent, six hundred and forty one yards, four touchdowns, one interception, eighty eight point one yards an attempt. Yeah.

So they have. Yeah. They have to back up quarterback, they need to keep sub them. Neither one is comfortable in a starting rule. Every time they come in I'm like oh man that guy should start. Oh man, that guy should write. A sub is just a boat that's lurking underwater and yes when it's bethen coming in like he it's a sad sparke. You never want to say like we need an off, we need a spark for our offense by bringing in CJ better because it's not a spark with him.

You're just turning the gas on. Maybe you'll feel funny for a little bit off the fumes, but you're not going to start a fire with them, right? Yes. When it's Nick Bones, I think they're both gunslinger's and we have a good Sliger. Performs better when he's not fully prepared. Correct. When he gets out there and he just says, fuck it, I'm going to throw him out, I'm just going to throw the ball around like it's in the backyard.

Yes. And it plays in the dirt.

So the other in one final time. Well, the Cowboys are still weirdly they are in it. Yeah, they're in the NFC East because they beat each other up and they're battle tested. There's a bunch of different scenarios how it can shake out down the stretch. The Cowboys, as weird as it is to say, like any of those four teams, could win the NFC East.

Yes. Yes, it is crazy. Nick Bowen's nice guy. I think he might listen to the show. I'm not going to be mean to him because I like him. I've never met him, but I like him. He's got a little bit of a Mason Rudolph big face thing when they show his face at the end of a law at the end of a game and they're losing his face is too big. Oh, it's just too big. It just takes up too much size and it just makes you feel better.

I think he's got a smooth face. Yeah. But he's he's got a big ass face. Big ass has his face is an Instagram filter. Yeah. It's just too big.

Like I, I don't know, there's nothing he can do about it except maybe like have have this face or like have ice water ice bucket just on deck. So you dunk his head in there. Yeah. Just so I can sit there and be like OK, not, not a huge face but I noticed that today when they showed him on the sideline I was like damn McMillan-Scott big fucking head. Yeah.

There's another fun stat from today. This comes from our good friend Andrew Siriano. He said this is the first time that both teams have played each other when they're both in last place ever. So that's I guess that's that's pretty fun.

But they don't really play each other all the time. Then we can say not your father's cowboys. Not your father's Niners.

Yeah, exactly. So, yeah, just just go on. They should just swap out the starting quarterback immediately before game time. Yeah. Just keep going back and forth.

Do it like do like college real. Yeah.

No go back and forth, switching back and forth. So tongue to my mouth they did take it, they did take Nick Mullan's out because he was hurt. They said he was hurt. They said that he lost sensation in his arm. So he had the he had the funny bone. Yes. We're dealing with a funny bone epidemic in slow. So, yes. All right, next up, we got Lions, titans, so Titans absolutely killed Lions Tractor CEDO on pace for 2K, which I kind of I don't I think they'll probably he probably won't get it, not because he couldn't get it, but because why would you like once they clinch or once they're in the playoffs.

It seems like the smart thing to do is not just go four yards and carries for Derrick Henry right now, but you also want to protect Ryan Tannehill.

Yes. So Ryan Tannehill, Ryan Tannehill, Ryan Tannehill was fucking awesome in this game. And Ryan Tannehill, it needs to be repeated. And I actually your take about Ryan Tannehill, I don't totally disagree that eventually he's going to rear its ugly head and it's like, hey, he's still Ryan Tannehill, but we should give him credit when he is really, really good and he has been really, really good. So since week seven, twenty nineteen, when he took over his starting quarterback, he is third in the league in touchdown passes with fifty three, twenty four games, fifty three touchdown passes and second in the league for total touchdowns.

Sixty one. Yeah that's fucking good. He is. Yeah. Eight point seven yards. It's not like Ryan Tannehill deserves the credit for being an awesome quarterback the last year and a half, one of the top five quarterbacks in the league, whether you whether you think he's ranked there or not, he's ranked there statistically and he's like basically proof positive that if you get away from Adam, you'll be good. And every backup quarterback should look at that and be like, hey, I could maybe Ryan Tannehill if I get in the right system.

Well, Ryan Tannehill is bad for the NFL because he especially if you have a quarterback who's like, just wait, this guy needs a little bit more time to develop guy. He's going to make so many teams do the wrong thing. Just wait and be like, I think I've seen enough out of him where I think there's potential. Like, yes, you're right. Ryan Tannehill is good now. And for me it's just completely personal where it's like I spent I spent so long watching Ryan Tannehill and being so certain that he wasn't good.

It takes me some time to unlearn that. Yes. So my brain is dumb.

I know it's you know, what's going to happen is the minute you say to yourself, Ryan Daniels, really good, he will do something that like, oh, I got duped.

Yeah. And then I'll then I'll never change my mind again about anything. But Ryan Tannehill is the one guy where it's like he got to the next place and all of a sudden he's good. Right. Marcus Mariota could be that guy maybe in Las Vegas anywhere. And I'm just basing that off what. Three quarters of football.

That's enough for me. That's enough for me. Enough scouting that I've done. I'd like to give an inaugural award Boy of the week. Boy the week goes to Will Compton. Block of the Week. Boy of the Week. What's Boy of the Week. Oh, he had a nice hit and does have Boy of the Year. Boy the year which is a block this year. Boy the week. So Boston with the boys. Bill Compton had a Man-Sized goal line stand.

Yes boys becoming a man shout out to Boy of the Week Boy the week Bill Compton Inaugural Award will probably retire that after this week. He's the only winner. He's the only one that can enjoy the week. Maybe one to one comes back. He can win a boy of the week.

Another fun stat. The Titans have had four straight, nine and seven seasons, but not anymore, which is nice. It's perfect because not not in seven is the most boring record you can have as a team. It's also like the most AFC South record. Yes. Yeah, you're probably yeah. You're probably going to win the division fifty percent of the time going on seven and then get a wildcard. Thirty three percent of the time they do. So yeah they are.

They're no longer twins, no longer nine seven. And I still don't believe in them.

Well OK, here's here's here's here's the other side of this game. Matt Stafford is the toughest motherfucker in the league.

He had hurt ribs, someone else had hurt ribs.

And they set out for like five, five fucking weeks.

Matt Stafford had hurt ribs. Didn't practice all week. No, Kenny Golladay came out and still, like, kept the Lions in this game for three quarters. He got hurt. He got pulled when it became a blowout. But the lions so hurt ribs. Matt Stafford, no practice, no Kenny Golladay. The Lions still went seven for twelve on third down. That's what we've been saying all year. The Titans third down defense is the biggest issue.

When they need to get stops, they can't get stops when they need to get off the field to kick it off the field. When the lions go seven for twelve on third down with a hurt, Matt Stafford and no Kenny Golladay, you should be worried.

I'm officially entering into we must protect Matt Stafford at all costs. I want he's a tough I want to see what the fuck. I want to see Matt Stafford go to a contender.

Remember when he broke his shoulder and still in the came back in and threw such good trainers away?

Yes. Yeah. He had like a separated shoulder last year. He broke his back and we didn't find out till like two weeks later, like, oh, yeah, he's got a broken back. He's had Korona more times than the president of Brazil. This dude is a fucking horse. No one else. That's right. Yeah. He's also the all time record on. But I feel like going for the record. Yeah, but Stafford is like he's always there's always something going on with him, but not in a Ben Roethlisberger type.

No he's I would opposite. I would like. To see the like, if you put up the the info graphic side by side and show me the different glowing parts of Matt Stafford's body for what injuries he's had, I bet he looks like a Ben Roethlisberger.

If if if Ben Roethlisberger got the injuries that Matt Stafford had, he would just be sitting on the trainer's table and asking the trainer, am I dead? Yeah, the game. I actually don't don't fuck with me. I'm dead, right? Yeah. I'm not here on Earth.

No, I think he would have asked for Dr. Kevorkian to come in. Yeah. Like, just put me away. Yeah. I've seen enough euthanize me where I sit like a horse, but.

Yeah. So Matt Stafford's a tough motherfucker. I, I just think the Titans defense like it just they can get in shoot outs, they can win shootouts. But I mean I guess when you just judge everything against the chiefs, it's it's like the problem with the AFC this year is that you can you can say the Titans are a good team, but you still don't believe in them and be right on both of the things. And Titans fans will obviously get upset.

But it's the truth. Like, do you ever see the Titans being able to stop Patrick Mahomes in the Chiefs on third down, like with the game on the line?

Yeah, no, I think no, I think that they could score thirty points against the Chiefs. Yeah. And then the Chiefs will score fifty five. Right, exactly. Yeah.

So it's I don't know what they have to do to fix that, but their defense. Yeah. They can't get, they can't rush the passer, they can't get off the field on third down.

But Ryan Daniels really good. And, and Derrick Henry, fourth player in NFL history with fifteen hundred rushers in fifteen TDs plus in Back-To-Back seasons, two out of three of the other ones won the MVP in that season. So he should be considered. I don't know why we don't consider him. Shaun Alexander one in twenty five. Charlie Davis in 1998. Larry Johnson did not win it. Larry Johnson. I went back and I looked he had seven hundred and fifty two carries in that two year stretch.

Yeah. They tried to kill him. They tried to kill him. Seven hundred and fifty two carries and now he's the weakest person in the world. Yeah.

I would say there's, I mean I'd have to go look but like no team. I bet you that that would be like two teams combined carries as a team in two seasons now in today's NFL. Oh it's insane.

Seven hundred and fifty two. I actually think that was the death of the workhorse back. Yeah. I'll call back at 400 plus in the second year. Yeah.

Saying he was overused so much that the entire NFL was like never again. We've seen this guy's tweets. We can't do this to another running back. It's yeah. Derrick Henry. He needs he needs to chill with punching people in the face when he's running.

It's awesome, though. Every time it's so fun. Can you imagine if you're like a safety or a cornerback and you have to you've seen all like all your brethren get put on tape, get put on losers'? I would just try to grab his his beavertail. I would just try to grab his hair, tackle him by his hair. You can do that. It's not a horse collar. Yep. Yeah. And down by that.

Yeah. You absolutely can do that.

Yeah. There's like a bunch of teams I'm looking right now who are in, who are going to be under four hundred carries for their entire team.

Like almost almost the entire league is going to be under 400 carries except for like five teams. And he had that himself himself in that second year after going like three hundred and sixty carries just crazy.

Either way, Derrick Henry should be talked about in the in the MVP. I think if Derrick Henry doesn't get at least an MVP vote this year or gets in the discussion, we should officially say it's the death of ever having a non quarterback. I know Adrian Peterson won in 2012, but with the way the NFL has gone and how teams just don't run like they used to, that's it. Like it's never going to happen again.

Yeah. If he gets over 2000, I can see him getting like you have to. Football writers are so dumb. Yeah. When they see two thousand on the stat sheet, they'll be like, yeah, I kind of got to give them credit. You'll see some people vote for him just because he breaks that. But the reality is, yes. Derrick Henry, should you know what we're talking about him in the MVP race right now. Boom, we just did.

That's metric. Henry is officially in the conversation for NFL MVP. That's true. We're concerned, too.

We should need to do that. More words like, hey, you're the number one sports podcast.

You can just say it and then say other people are saying, yeah, which is just us saying if Derrick Henry. Yeah, all he has to do is like put up a couple of Instagram posts of like how much he really enjoys listening to Bruce Springsteen and U2 and then the voters will be like, yeah, I like this guy, go to and go to one lobster dinner with Peter King and you get his vote.

That's all it will take that that's literally it.

It's all you have to do. He will he can be bought with food. Well, actually, no, because remember, he he started hitting us after I bought him in and out burger. Right. And he hasn't paid me back.

Go to a restaurant we like eighteen dollars. Peter King. You got two burgers bro.

Go to eight to go to a restaurant with them right after somebody dies and let him see you break the news cordially to the hostess. And then I think he'll he'll be like game respect game. Just remember that.

If anyone wants to treated Peter King and tell him that he owes us think what's what's to look it up, what's to in and out burgers in a fry, he got to in and out burgers and fry. Well, as I paid for it, I remember, Hank, you were in the car with me. We got like a shitload of food where the Niners facility shot out the Niners for letting us hang out all day there.

And yeah, we need to get as a journalist him and also get the interest rates for the last two years.

So there's no there's inflation. I got to charge points on it. We think it's fucking there's no such thing as a free lunch. That's literally you say. Yeah, but if you want to talk about like ethics in journalism. Right. As a reporter, he should not have accepted a lunch from somebody that he was doing an interview with. Right.

That's against all the shout out the time Jay Caspian Kang came over and interviewed us and he bought his own dinner. Yeah, we always like for the office. And he's like, I can't even yes. We're like, dude, you can have a slice.

We always overorder pizza. He's like, no, I cannot have a slice. Like, damn, that is legit journalism. Meanwhile, Peter King just fucking get double double animal style.

Yeah. Peter on the house.

Tell you what, all things, all things will be stricken from this record. If you just buy us lunch one day, just have lunch in and out. I want it out. Yeah. Yeah, he's in and out. And you know what. OK, this actually made me pause when we ordered Peter King lunch. We said we got two burgers for you and he comes in and like we're still feeding like a couple of the equipment guys around.

Yeah, we bought a shitload, told them to take some to Peter immediately takes his two burgers out of the pile. Like that's a situation where you grab the one burger. Right, eat it. And then you look at how things are shaking out. Yeah. How that a football. Yeah. You want to see how things are playing out amongst the people that are eating. You don't want to take two and then have one person he like.

He basically took two burgers and sneezed on him both immediately. I was like, well I guess no one else can imagine.

My dad walked in Bob Lane and was like, Hey, where's my burger? Yeah, I would have been mortified.

Yeah, it would have been very bad looking for all. Yeah.

I believe he owes you ten sixty seven. I realized how cheap in and out. But what fries and milkshakes to. Oh I didn't say I did two burgers. Two I don't know, double burgers. Four for each.

So fries are one eighty seven which brought us to nine ninety five and tocks was. What about interest. What exercise. What if I put that in and what if I put that in savings for the last two years. How much time.

Sixty seven. Two years ago. How much. Yeah. Penstock. Oh yeah. Put it. Could have been penstock. Ten, sixty seven in penstock two years ago.

Two summers ago now when the price was in twenty eight to help here.

I think he owes us like three hundred bucks. Yeah.

So penstock in twenty eighteen when we didn't even know the pen existed we would have totally invested.

Actually no bitcoin do bitcoin, we would have bought bitcoin do bitcoin in twenty eighteen. What was the summer price of bitcoin ahmadu an ad and then we'll get that answer. All right. You know you should be getting if you're talking about investments, put your box. The greatest investment of all time.

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And it's the best meat ship right to my door. I always get my butcher box. I'll have I'll make a big chili. I'll make sure that I have a little little extra for a couple more dinners. But I always start with a big chili because they have great grass fed finished beef. They have free range organic chicken heritage pork, wild caught Alaskan salmon and sugar nitrate free bacon.

It's basically put butcher box like, hey, this food showing up to your house, boom, make a chili. What's better than that? What is better than that? And then you still can make some pork chops, some salmon, all of it with butcher box. Put your box. It's the highest quality meat around for just six dollars a meal. And right now you can get two pounds of salmon absolutely free. This is like Hank basically catching the salmon with his hands for free.

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So if we had bought if we'd taken the ten dollars that Peter King absconded with, robbed us of and invested it in Bitcoin in twenty eighteen the summer of so bitcoin in July of twenty eighteen was 6k fluctuate around six K it is now fluctuating around twenty four K present day.

So he wouldn't forty for. Forty dollars, forty dollars, I feel like we should retroactively convert that depend, though, more. I think I think Penny will be more pen.

Pen probably would be more pen back than Pen would probably probably was around ten dollars stocks.

So it's probably right around 90 bucks. So it's ninety one dollars. Right.

You know, and add them together. So like one hundred thirty dollars the five year. Yeah. So back in twenty eighteen and then compound the interest. July six. Twenty eighteen. It was thirty four US dollars.

OK so and then so, so actually it's less is 3x.

You compound that interest every single day, just about anywhere between 10 and 20 thousand dollars for those two burgers that we bought them in July twenty eighteen.

And add in the fact that actually, you know, we really should do is hey Peter, if you don't pay us for those burgers, we're going to take your journalism degree. How much was that? OK, that's like today's price. That's probably two hundred thousand dollar education.

Yeah. We need to report him to the governing body of journalism ethics, which would be what's going to go to.

That's actually just Peter Garrett's phone. I was going to say Dan Rather. Yeah. Yeah. I think I think Peter owes us a lot of money.

That's the bottom line. Yeah. All right, Peter, pay up. All right. Next game, Texans Colts protect Sean Watson at all costs. We get those tweets going. He was awesome. He's awesome. And basically every Texans game and they lose every single game and they lose.

And hilarious, terrible, heartbreaking fashion this time was essentially the same exact thing they did two weeks ago against the Colts. Driving late game gets them all the way down the field fumble came over.

Yeah. So I think that obviously when the Colts have to force Buckner at full strength, there are different teams like he is a guy that makes and Dariusz World, Darius Leonard, who but some some weeks, of course, Buckner is a guy that I give him my he's like Terrell Suggs, where you just see him on the field and he's fucking scary looking. He's intimidating looking. And even when he's on the field with, like, a bunch of other six foot tall, 300 pound people, you're like, that dude is huge.

How did a human being am I the same species as the forest partner? But when he's out there making plays like that, defense is legit. And Darius Leonard is one of the best linebackers in the league.

Yeah, he forced the fumble. I'm starting to come back around on the calls, OK?

I just don't I dare them. My most confusing team. Yes.

So the Colts to me, I'm flummoxed by them. The Colts are. So I guess the way I would describe the Colts is they're the most steady, like I don't think they're ceilings that high, but I also don't think they're flaws that low. Like, they're pretty consistent. Well, they lost the Jaguars. They did lose the Jaguars week. Well, that's a pretty low force. Yeah, that's a different different, you know, Jaguars.

We all thought like it's like a split level basement. It's pretty low. No, but they've beaten some good teams.

We've lost some good teams have gotten blown out. They blown other teams out like they're they're pretty consistent. I just think that for them to be considered real, I don't know. I just like Phil Rivers.

Like, if you can if you can pressure him like he is or he can't move, he can't move. He just doesn't.

And also their defense has been good. But it's also given up like I think right around 400 yards last three games.

So I guess two of those were against the Texans. And Deshaun Watson is still like even in the bad Texans team, he's putting up numbers.

I don't know. I don't know what to make of the Colts. I just throw them in the pile of whatever. Yeah. They're like they're not going to beat the chiefs.

So whatever they might, depending who they play in the playoffs, they could win a playoff game.

But if you took that right, if you took the Chiefs out of if you just eliminated the Chiefs. Every team in the AFC, I feel like the Super Bowl. Yeah, you can make the you know what I mean. I wouldn't I still wouldn't trust the Colts to give the Super Bowl.

I still a couple of game run here.

I'm very confused again by the usage of Jacoby. Brissett seemed like last week we got away a little bit from the like Jacoby Brisset package, which as far as I can tell, the Jacoby Brissett package is just like putting him into a game to make him happy. Yes, and which to be fair, he's got great smile. He gets in the game, he doesn't have to do anything he can do, like a quarterback, sneak people like his name, he's got a cool name, then he jogs to the sideline and then he's happy.

And just a nice way of keeping him happy, I guess.

But like, there's no there's no, like, dual threat that you have.

If you have the platoon of Philip Rivers and Jacoby Brissett, it just is what it is.

And yeah so I mean Phil Rivers played very well that pass he made with the basically the game on the line up up the seam to tie Hilton to, to get to like first and goal. That was a big time throw. I think Frank Reich even said it after the game like hey he might be he might be our quarterback next year too.

OK, great. Because people around. Why not? They're they're doing they're going to be in the playoffs, you know, I mean, they're playing good football. So this is as good as you could have hoped for with a quarterback off the street.

Yeah. So like getting a new guy in like half a million years. A million years old yet, but trillion years old. I agree. I don't think that they're going to make any real noise. But again, they're a very confusing team. So it could be I could be totally wrong about the Colts, like they could catch fire, but I don't see them. I don't see them doing it.

I really so we joke about, like Deshaun Watson, protect him at all costs. But there are there is a sect of Twitter that I think they just don't want Deshaun Watson to ever play another game again. It's like getting a rare car and never driving it. They want him to just be safe but not play football like, hey, don't like protect him protective. It's like, well, his job is to play football. So he's going to keep playing football or he might get hurt.

Is there a show quarterback. Yeah, right. It's not to be tough. It's crazy. What do you want here. Do you want him to play or not?

Because you keep tweeting that you need to protect me if you search like protect Deshaun Watson at all costs, there's a large like group of blue checkmark or something like that who have tweet that basically every week.

Yeah. He's like the DC in Spinal Tap where they go and look at the guitars and the guy starts to point out he's like, don't even touch it, don't point at it. Right. It's not don't ever play. It's not meant to be played. Right. That is Deshaun. I think that there's it's got to be a small sect because I haven't seen as much as you have. But if you search it to just to get myself.

Yes. You get you got the pain.

Oh, I did. Shane Watson is just a ridiculous thing to say. Right. He's he's a great quarterback. But like the Texans are such a mess right now. This isn't this isn't going to be a one year fix for the Texans. Yeah.

Like Bill O'Brien, the crater that he's created, much similar to his own chin, is going to be a tough one to get out of for the Texans because they don't have they have no assets, practically asset lists, and they don't really have any weapons, although I guess David Johnson is a fine player.

Yeah. All right. Next up, we got Patriots. Dolphins, Hank, it's over. Eleven straight seasons. The Patriots went to the playoffs. That is a record. I don't think. I don't know if we'll ever be duplicate, I guess, when they should have gone that way.

Yeah, but but then you have to also say, like, he'll never get hurt, you know, I mean, like, it's it's pretty crazy. Eleven straight years going to the playoffs is insane. They officially get eliminated today with the loss of the Dolphins. Cam Newton is not the quarterback.

Nope. For it. He's he might retire by the way.

Yeah. Like, I, I don't know how we get offers. I don't know if I want to be a backup. He's not a starter right now. Maybe he can play himself back into being a starter. But if I were Cam Newton and I made a shitload of money, I had like a legacy where MVP, you know, the Auburn days winning national title, I don't I don't know if I'd want to, like, suck for go outside.

Well, yes, suck for a few years and have everyone be like Cam Newton sucks. Well, no, he was awesome.

Well, also, the the outfits are tough when when you're losing. Just fabulous. Yes. We're not playing well.

He can't he needs to adjust his outfits and he doesn't. He's admitted that too. He doesn't have backup quarterback outfits. No, I don't think he owns them. You can't be a better dresser than the starter.

Backup could be part of the reason why he wants to keep playing those because he needs a reason to wear all these outfits.

You think like, you know, he retires, he's going to look at it cause I'm like, well, what do I do with it? Yeah, what he should do is he should just he should give himself a motivational factor and not allow himself to wear nice clothes until he starts winning, like he should basically get dressed like me for every game. Just show up like with whatever he pulls out a bit, gets piled up and then just like stand behind the podium.

And then, you know what? You get one win once you pop on the bulletin.

What do what do the people like Matthew Berry not to pick on him do now after tweeting like thirty one teams passed on Cam Newton. Oh, I think you just keep still true. I think you turn your phone, the people like Matthew Berry, you turn your focus on to Josh Jacobs.

That was a very quick like, hey, Cam Newton is incredible. I can't believe all these teams pass on and maybe teams pass on him because he's been injured and he doesn't look like the same guy that won the MVP. Yeah.

So he it's almost painful watching him throw the ball. And it really is like a four year old shooting on a ten foot hoop.

It's not. It's not. There's nothing natural about it. No, it doesn't flow.

No, I don't think I don't I don't think he's healthy.

No, he's like watching him throw is like watching Charles Barkley swinging a golf club. There's like hitches and weird things going on.

I still don't know the long term side effects of covid guys. That's true. Good point. That is very good. But he he did play like a spaz today. He that fumble that he had was all gone bad. There's no more frustrating play in football. Then when somebody fumbles it right on the sideline and the defense picks it up and runs it back, like if you're if that's your team that you're watching. Yeah. Like you go through all the bargaining stages, like he was out of bounds.

Oh, someone was out of bounds and then touch. Yes. And was out of bounds. Then touch it.

That guy it looked like his toe was on the line. Was that a late hit? Could that even be like a fifteen yard personal foul. No, he was in bounds. Fuck, we're screwed. We're absolutely screwed.

So while we're on the topic of outfits, the pants are mine. Oh yeah. Oh do you want them. I give them back. I guess you got to give them back.

Thank you. So what do you want a quarterback in the draft. Yeah. Who, where the. They'll be like mid mid first round. So feel free lance now. Fields will go higher than that. Free lance maybe. Zach Wilson, BYU, BYU kid.

Yep. Hmm. Interesting.

What you don't like them too much of a Patriots pick, right. Yeah. Zach Wilson and then the Dolphins. I so too he had no one to throw today.

Devante Parker and Miccosukee were out.

He also had that interception, which was a terrible interception in the first quarter or whatever it was when he was on the goal line. And he just like he like went backwards and threw it across his body, across the field.

But he then fixed it later on in the game and he basically had the same play and ran in for a touchdown. So he's I feel like he's learning ish.

Yeah. I don't know what it is about the Dolphins, but they they win a lot of weird games.

It's like they have a chaotic way about they've got they've got so many like different parts of their team that can play really poorly, but also other parts that can play really well. But there's no rhyme or reason to win. Which facet of the team is going to show up on any given week they're there.

The Dolphins like vibe is like a ten year old with A.D not taking his Ritalin like they have something about them that's just kind of chaotic, like their defense is chaotic. They forced turnovers, their offense a little chaotic. I don't know. I don't know what it is, but they just have a chaotic vibe to them.

All their games feel like, well, they're all they're always weird scores. Yeah. They're always there's always. They're always bermann scores. Twenty to twelve.

Yeah. They're always doing something really well and something really poorly. But the combination of their performance is always like a little bit above average. Right.

And I mean they have they have a defined identity by the way they play good defense and they can run the ball and, you know, hope to it can make a couple of big plays. I hope they go to the playoffs.

Yeah, I'd like to see them in the playoffs. This was the first time that Dolphins running back had one hundred yards in two years. Wow. Yeah, it's been a while, but but it's not like they're bad running, right?

They can run the ball. They just don't have a like, you know, a Derrick Henry. Yeah.

And they would have some games where Fitzpatrick would somehow get like fifty five yards rushing and then their other running backs would also have fifty five yards rushing. Right. And they end up at the end of the day you're like wow. Yeah. They ran for one hundred seventy actually that's crazy.

I just if I were a Dolphins fan Jake you are, I would be very nervous about um expect them to go like ten six and missed the cut. Oh really. I think they'll get to the playoffs. So are they. Not right now.

I think they're in. But the Ravens. Oh yeah. The Ravens.

One of the Ravens will be out right now. Yeah. The Ravens would be out right now.

So they have a big game on Saturday night against the Raiders corpse of the Raiders.

So if I were the Dolphins, though, like I'm thinking about it, if they have to go to like Buffalo or Pittsburgh, that's that's when that is that's an official sign when the candy ass uniforms come and play, when you play in the cold and you're wearing that fucking color, your candy. Yeah.

The lower you go, the more the teal becomes more of a pasto, the temperature.

So you're talking about solving I'm a hundred yards. He told his grandma was in the hospital that he'd got a hundred yards for her and he did.

How many? How many? She calls him the real cheetah. How many games in a row did he say that to her, though?

I mean, I don't know. Is she OK? Did he cure you?

Babe Ruth, like Babe Ruth definitely went around and just told my kids like, hey, kid, I might hit a couple of dingers.

Well, he was drunk till like everyone when it happened to be like.

Yep, told you he was just hammered going around making bold proclamations and eventually got it right. It's like it's like when watching a game with, like, your dad and he just constantly is like up game, up game is like, well, if you keep saying that, eventually it's going to be.

I actually imagine it's pretty similar to listen to part of my take. Yeah. Like you just say a bunch of stuff and then once in a while call the shots. We're going to record three shots for you this week.

Yeah. Yeah, we were. You just tell people like I'm going to record three parts to it. Yeah. Yeah. But we aren't this week doing two. Two. Yeah that's right.

I was confused. I was like, wait, it's like the one we did in that sixty three to fifty of the 52 weeks.

OK, what are Patriots fans going to do in January. Not having football to look forward to in the playoffs on the weekends.

I don't know just who would ever thought that this would be the day would come that you and I are still in the hunt. Yeah.

Can you imagine your team being eliminated begat? Nope. Couldn't be me. I'll be rooting for you guys.

I want you guys to experience, you know, someone again who's experienced two championship parties.

Since this podcast has been birthed, I'm hoping for you to experience the same thing you forget about the Washington Mystics and the Washington Nationals and the Washington Capitals are not NFL teams. That's true.

I also feel like you're always taking like a vacation year. It's like a vacation year to covid. Yeah, it's like a vacation year from from being in the hunt.

It's just hard when it's like, you know, eleven straight playoff teams. It's hard to be like. So down in the dumps it's like. Right. It hurts but it has to happen eventually. That's good perspective.

I'll bet Belichick is going to show up at some college football games like some of the postseason. He'll probably go to the Alabama Games. Yes, it's like be on the sidelines as an extra coach. Yes. Yes.

All right. Speaking of a team in the hunt, the bears are back in the hunt. There's thirty three Vikings. Twenty seven. Matt Nagy after the game, this was a quote.

You see when Robiskie has to throw the ball 21 times and were able to run the ball with the running back for thirty two attempts, it makes the offense a lot easier and it's effective.

No fucking shit, dude. How long did it take you to figure that one out?

Dave Montgomery is awesome. It's like it's it's the division of running back.

It's crazy that he actually had that quote and said it with a straight face. No fucking shit. Yeah. Putting Mr. Besuki in a good situation where you don't ask him to throw forty times a game, you don't ask him to make hard reads, you let him move around in the pocket and make plays with his feet. Holy fuck dude. It only took you till it was all over. Look, it's all over Mitch. Mitch is playing well.

I'm happy for him but it's over and now you're figuring it out. I don't know if it's over though.

Like if, if this man I mean if this Mitch from this week and last week keep showing up. No, but it's not over. You're going to talk yourself in the middle. No, I very quickly listen, I love that he's playing well.

It's over because just talking realistically here, Matt Nagy's either getting fired and if he gets fired, the new coach is not going to have Metrobus, my friend, my friend.

And if the Bears make the playoffs, I don't know. I know. I don't think. Oh, hold on fire. I know. I know. So that's I'm saying he's either getting fired and if he gets fired, he's going to the new coach will get a new quarterback. And if he stays, he's getting a new quarterback. He's not keeping Mr. Brisky as a quarterback. He's just not.

And I actually am happy for me because I hope he goes somewhere that he can have a Ryan Tannehill resurgence where, like, if it's risky, goes to the fucking forty Niners like and gets to be the backup there for a couple of years. That would be incredible.

I think he would be super successful. Like he has some skills that can get you to a winning, like they can win you football games.

I think he's looked really good the last couple. Yeah. Yeah. And so he did have that one pick. There's a very serious chance. There's a chance that he sticks to that he becomes the guy in Chicago and you have to go into next year. And it's Matt Nagy and Mitch Travis.

Well he's not under contract. I don't know. It's I would doubt that they're going to pay him money to stay there. Well, I'm just tell us when you say, well, I know.

Well, if you want to say for free, they would probably let him take that.

I, I don't know, man. There's something I don't do this. There's something I know. There's something I've seen in the last couple of.

Yeah. You know what it is? It is. It's risky. It's the Lions defense is a Texans defense. No, no. I think that's a coincidence. That's one of those teams.

I think that I don't know. He is way better. You they should be you have to you have to grade this on a scale of Chicago Bears quarterbacks like as far as Bears Cubs go, this has been like he's been lighting the world on fire. He is madder. You should be fired just because of the fact that he went to Nick Foles with this offensive line. Like Mr. Brisky makes this offensive line better because Metrobus, he can actually move around and avoid being sacked, whereas Nick Foles, God bless him, won a Super Bowl.

He's a statue. So Matt Nagy's assessment of like his team and how the quarterback fits with this team was so fucking off in this season that he should be fired for. Well, yeah, like you came home saying is don't be surprised when going into next year. No, you're like we're going to I'm going to have to do this again. Negi No, he's not he's not happy. I, I matinées not going to have Misperceives quarterback if he stays.

I don't know.

And I like what Mitch has been doing and I want, I want to go away, I want him to go because he needs to find a better home if he loves get away, love something, set it free.

This home is not good for you. It was meant to be. It'll come to a broken home.

It's a broken home, broken promises. But with all that said, the bears are still in the hunt. And if they went out, they need the cardinals to lose one game. But if they went out and that could happen because the Packers could maybe, maybe start No one in week seventeen, the Bears will have a decent chance to make the playoffs. I can't believe it. And whatever. I don't know. I don't even know what I'm like.

I guess I want them to go to the playoffs because then I'll get myself so fucking riled up and then they'll probably get just absolutely shit canned by, I don't know, the Saints or whatever.

But who the fuck cares? Making the playoffs.

Yeah. So you trade it. If you were to look back on it, you would not trade the short term gratification for the fact that you would just get bounce in the playoffs, have a worse draft pick, and then Matt Nagy would stick around. But in the moment, like you want to be in the right, I can't against can't and decide. No. Justin Jefferson saying, fuck, Kirk, come on, throw the ball. Yes, we hear you.

Justin was awesome here. I thought that was me.

Yes, that was awesome. And Dave Montgomery is very good. So since the run, you know, the run, he's had four hundred thirty four yard, six point one yards per carry, six touchdowns.

That's changed his career MVP like no people laughed at us. We're talking about the run. It literally created the greatest running back in history that run last couple of weeks. Everything is opened up. Yeah, he's fun to watch. I like him. Yeah.

He finishes runs like he's an angry runner at the end, but yeah. So the bears are kind of back and the defense shot the defense because they did bail out that one terrible pick for Mitch. But I'm happy for Mitch. I'm not really happy for Matt Nagy because I don't really like him. But as Mike said, we're just going to keep bringing Dan Bailey out onto the field.

I guess so. I think so. I think he's like fucking you're going down with the ship. You're not you're cutting Dan Bailey right now would be too kind for him. Yeah. He needs to stick around. And like Mike Zimmer wants him to face the music and like, deal with the consequences of his actions.

Right, Kyra? Santos is awesome, by the way. It's nice to have that.

Like it turns out you just pay a kicker and it's safe to say that clip for a little bit, whatever. I mean, if we're in a playoff game, I'll be happy. Honestly, I will, because this season has been just a stupid roller coaster of idiocy and dumb shit and drives me nuts.

I actually think that Zimmer might cut Dan Bailey now after a good game, he goes, Mike, Mike Zimmer, get out. Now. Mike Zimmer is probably uncomfortable liking his kicker, right?

Right. Absolutely. He's like, I fucking hate this guy. Now, that is good. Absolutely. Where were you two weeks ago?

All right. The Seahawks in Washington football team. Yeah, that game was non non divisional game, non divisional.

We learn from Mike McCarthy. Those don't really matter. Yeah. And in a weird twist of fate, like Mike McCarthy might end up being a million percent. Correct, about not caring about not individual games. Yes.

Yeah. The NFC East, all you care about is the division. So he's right. Dwayne Haskins again. Well, Dwayne Haskins is the most improved quarterback in the NFL from the first to the second half this week.

Right. I've never seen a quarterback. Tom Brady. No. From that he improved after the first quarter.

No, they they scored zero points in the first half.

I thought he was better in the second quarter, scored zero points. But most improved is what I'm saying. OK, like Dwayne Haskins was, you can't get worse than Dwayne Haskins, right? He I've never seen a quarterback throw four more zero yard gains.

Well, in my life, the two sacks at the end of the game were very Dwane like, oh man. Yeah, the Washington football team, are they going to do this?

And then he took back to back like 15 yards.

Well, I'd also, if we're being honest, I would count this game probably more in my tie category because they missed an extra point and then they had to go for two. So now they're down three points. And then at the end of the game, they were in field goal range. Wright could have kicked the field goal that would have tied the game at twenty apiece. So, like between this game and the tie that we had against that, they missed an extra points to, then they had to go for two.

So they were chasing that point. So they went for two and they did a later and they didn't get it. Now they now there it might minus gotten the extra point or they would have had two extra, there would have had two extra points and then they could have kicked a field goal at the inside.

So between this game and the game against the Giants earlier this year where Ron Rivera was in Phuket mode and went for two to try to win the game at the end, just because he didn't think that it would matter, that's two times that we could have had on a record, which would be more than the Eagles fans.

The. Then the Lions game was a tie, too, if Chase Young didn't push them over. So that's the Washington football team should be three times six. Would that be a bad math?

Six, six, six, five and three, six, four, six, five and three, six, five and three. Right now, that's that's what we should be. Turns out it's looking right now.

We're time traveling. It's looking like it won't really matter that.

No, it doesn't. Because the Eagles lost, the Cowboys won, but they needed to win and the Giants just lost.

Maybe it turns out and I'll put myself put my hand up here because I was I never I don't think I ever said, like, strongly let Russell Cook, but I was I want to see Russell Cook.

I like watching Russell Wilson throw the football.

But maybe, just maybe people on Twitter aren't smarter than head coaches because the Seahawks had like a very even game here.

Actually, Russell Wilson only threw for one hundred twenty one yards. They ran four hundred eighty one and maybe, just maybe running the ball unlocks Russell Wilson to really cook in less cooking time.

Yeah, it's a possibility. Maybe throwing the ball fifty times the game isn't winning.

I've been saying let Chris Carson eat. Right. Chris Carson, he had I think he only averaged like four yards per carry today. So it wasn't like a great. But Chris Carson is a dude where when he gets the ball he can like he's not really a threat to get a hundred yards or like ninety yards on a breakaway run, but he'll get like eight to 12 yards very frequently. I think what it is, is you just need you need to let Russell Cook put the cookbook needs to be like fifty easy meals that can make it thirty minutes or less.

Yeah. Like a microwave. Yeah. You shouldn't be doing he shouldn't be making like pastries, cooking pastries for an entire day or like elaborate cakes or occasionally he can.

Yeah. Sometimes you can but you don't want him do that. Sometimes having ramen for dinner is perfectly fine.

Had it last night. Yeah. Awesome. Let Ross cook a hamburger with maybe some potatoes on the side and maybe.

Maybe cheese. Yeah. Maybe some cheese. Like if Russ is cooking a cheeseburger and and Chris Carson is bringing like the side of mashed potatoes, that's going to be a good meal.

Let Russ warm up his buns on the grill. That always makes you feel like you're really doing something extra. Yeah.

Or, you know, sprinkle like a little bit of parsley on top. Yeah. Like, all of a sudden this burger is now worth thirty dollars in New York. Right, exactly. Russ Yeah.

Get the pretzel bun. Let him do that. That's a pretzel pretzel buns over. Feel a little classy. It does. It's like yeah. If you if you drink a beer out of one of those snifters that you can really get the aroma and yeah that instantly makes a beer snob like immediately hard. Right. You could take like a average beer and turn into a great one.

So a pretzel.

But essentially just saying, hey, I don't want to feel like a sad sack eating a hamburger on my couch like, oh, I got a pretzel bun. Yeah. Yeah, that's that's the other thing I had with this game is the NFL thought that they could sneak a new type of camera by us.

Oh. Without without any promotion whatsoever. And they're they're sadly wrong. The camera is sweet. I don't know what the lens they were using for that or what it was. They would only have it after touchdowns. It was down on the ground field level. And it's like the same camera that they used to film porn that you have to pay for it. And that's the only way I can describe it.

It's the porn when you video games, it's the porn when they do like the there's no music or anything behind it. Yeah, it's HD camera Madisen. I've some IT masonite. My comeback player of the year. She got hit by a car. People forget that. Oh my God. Well I was like three years ago she fucked and she's back to hell. Yeah. Like all the way back. It's like Big Ben. I think most porn stars are comeback players.

Yeah, but this is this I mean she's like one hundred pounds. She got hit by a car. Yeah. It's pretty impressive. It's fucking incredible. So she's back. It's like the videos where you accidentally click on one and it's you have to put on the porn goggles, the porn and you're like, I don't, I'm not that horny.

It look like Porcher mode. I said that and he was like, wait, that's just an iPhone. Yeah. Like, no, Billy, I was just saying that. But, you know, sometimes you take a portrait mode picture and it looks like things are floating and you're like, well, that's too real. Yeah. Look, let's just go back to the regular. Yeah. That's what it look like.

By the way, if I'm ever wearing any sort of headgear to help me masturbate, just kill me.

I've thought you do that. Many just shoot me in the head at that point. I don't want to go on. Like, can you imagine that? Just like sitting down on your couch calmly and be like, all right, I'm kind of horny and you put a fucking helmet on to help you jack off. Yeah, but OK, counter argument. I feel like those people are like well adjusted in cells instead of like, let me just rage online in cells.

I guess it's better if you're if you're putting the headgear on, you're open about it. Well, and also if you feel shame wearing like the porn goggles, no, that's a low place.

I think that if you reach a point where you're like, hey, look, things aren't going great for me, probably not going to be. Hey. Out with real live girls, let me invest some of my disposable income into making my experience better, and I know I'm not going to judge anyone for that.

I think Lenny Balls might do that and I'm not going to judge him. I think he might more power to snotting, but I don't I think it was just too hot for me.

But he might also have the goggles. He definitely got goggles. Right.

But as he definitely has done it right now, if he does it as his routine. Right.

Can you imagine walking in on somebody wearing those. No. Is going to town? No, no.

It's not like time traveling alien.

Yeah.

That's got to be the worst luck of all time is of all the worst looks being. And just imagine like not even I'd imagine the person not even like he's got this is like jeans at his ankles.

So he didn't even step out of the loop. You know, when you're like that lazy like I'm going to step out little, I'm going to let myself really enjoy this 3-D porn.

I got to sneak a quickie in real quick. He just unzipped, says you need to take his balls out of his dick hole on his pants and he's got the goggles on. Yeah.

Anyway, we don't judge we're judgment free. But the bottom line is the camera that they used in the Seahawks football team is pretty cool.

Yeah, it was it was very cool. It was very, very cool. And they did just do it without telling us anything. Have you guys done for K yet? Have you done for K that shoots like that.

I think so. It's not a drug. No but it makes me want to try that for casual.

I don't know, I don't know how your TV.

Yeah. Have you done it. Of course. But you have to click the button which is. Do you want to watch this before K shit's wild. So is that like the motion smoothing thing. No, I don't know what it's just fairings. Yeah.

When your name's Sky Fox has it. So like when you're watching college football on Fox, it will say, like you want to watch some Forkan. And every time I see him, I'm like, giddy up. Yeah, let's do it. And it's awesome. It's very clear. I got to try it then, but I stay woke.

I think Fox has shitty HD cameras because they want everyone to not watch it for K, they do have the war station cameras and they also updated Cledus this week.

The CIA's got like a holiday theme too. So that was kind of nice.

I love it. All right. What's the bottom line is how this shakes out. The football team's going to be just fine. I said going into this week that we didn't need this one. Yeah, for starters.

But so you have your you told me last week that you have a bottle on ice ready to go. If the Washington football team gets in the playoffs, what was it?

I always keep bottles. I scribble. Yeah, screwball screwball whiskey. You know, I have that on. I keep that motherfucking thing on me. Tell me a little bit about screwball whisky's great big cat, and I think you know that. But it's a peanut butter whiskey. So it's it's delicious. You know, it's really good. And I did this on Saturday morning. Little screwball, little coffee, little eggnog, all mixed together into one awesome drink.

It was delicious. Nice warm way to start the day. You can put it in old fashioned. You can put it into Manhattan. You can have it neat on the rocks, put it in the other cocktail. Doesn't matter. Screwball peanut butter whiskey is extremely tasty. It's the ultimate duo of two American favorites, American whiskey and peanut butter. The end result is a whiskey that sips different from it's warm and welcoming aroma to its deliciously sweet meat.

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OK, Jaguars. Ravens not a lot. Dez Bryant scored a touchdown. Yeah. Who's back of the week from the X.

Eleven hundred days. Eleven hundred and six days since his last touchdown. That's actually really cool and we made fun of him but because he's very slow. But that's cool. This was I don't know, the Ravens just love to beat up on teams like this. This was never in doubt. I just I at some like ten years from now you'll be able to get like a good laugh out of being like, remember when, like, the government that was fucking.

Yeah.

Mansharamani, I hope it maybe catches on some. Or else, but it does also feel like it's fading a little. I mean, I think he should have a really nice career as a backup quarterback. Yeah, but that will be a fun garden.

Minshew thing. Yeah, it was incredible.

It's kind of like it's the new age of insanity. Yeah.

Joe Webb, when I get to say Joe Webb and everyone laugh, you know, Webb started to play off.

Minshew, I feel like had for a moment we thought he was like, oh yeah.

He was like, why doesn't everyone just draft a gardener? Yup. Turns out an all time part of my story. Yeah.

No, I love the guy, Jack. I think he will have a nice career as backup. I wouldn't put them, I wouldn't write him off coming in, in the right spot on the right team and saving like he is the perfect.

If I had a team that was set at quarterback looked good all around. He's the perfect guy to bring in to be like, hey, if our starter goes out for three weeks garnishments, you can win you two games. Yes. Yeah.

No, he's that he's going to be a good backup, I think. And actually the Play of the week in this game was what's his name. Terry Phillips, the offensive lineman. Yes. Ran. He's like so many pounds running for a first down, just truck stick dude.

And he had immaculate ball security. Yup. He had like two hands on it. None of the Marshall knew how stuff. Yeah. Palming it with one hand who by the way, he's on the Titans to the Titans have more boys. They have all of the they've got all the, all the boys. But yeah he had like he when you say that an offensive lineman or a big dude is carrying the football like it's a loaf of bread, that should actually be a compliment.

The guy's a big dude. Would he'd hold that like, hi, I'm hungry, I'm not gonna steal my fucking loaf of bread. Yes, but it was awesome. Like that play made watching parts of this game worth it.

Yes, I'd agree. That was an awesome play. Lamar was I don't know, he was dicing people up. That's about it.

He also had a couple of head scratchers. I like going bad through his head. Yeah, no, that first interception was a head scratcher for sure. Big time had screwed big time, had a nice city.

But the Jaguars are so bad that like that was a safety then and then. Oh, James Robinson, we we've we've shouted him out a few times on my Florio's team.

No big deal but the last five rookies to have fourteen hundred scrimmage yards and ten TDs, James Robinson, Cequent, Alvin Kamara, Kareem Hunt, Ezekiel Elliott. Pretty good. Pretty good groupies in there. Yeah.

Not like that's a he's something that you have Jaguars fans going forward and the Jaguars did lose in the NFL and also won at the same time. Oh my gosh. Now the Jacksonville Jaguars are on the clock that next week, next week, a franchise altering day for the Jaguars.

Let's actually just do that. Let's just go to the next game.

So, yeah, we can we can do a nice Segway here. And just verbal meme. Adam Schefter tweeted out the Trevor Lawrence Photoshop in a Jacksonville Jaguars uniform again.

Oh, he's done that like got it.

I don't know what the, like, mass email situation looks like at ESPN, but somehow like him and Field Yates, everyone basically everybody at ESPN that's on the air in charge of breaking news, got the Trevor Lawrence Photoshop at the same time. Yes. And now they're just using it willy nilly, I think, go one step further and cut his hair into mullet, having, like, really ingratiate yourself into the Jacksonville community. Yes.

Yes. So what we're talking about is the Jets beat the Rams seventeen half point underdogs. The Jets beat the Rams. And it is a franchise altering win because they were going to get Trevor Lawrence. And he does seem like a sure sure thing. I it's the most Jets thing possible. The Jets to suck all year, be comically bad and then pull this game out of their hat and be like, hey, we just did the one thing we weren't supposed to do at the fucking finish line two.

Yeah, three games left.

But well, you could say that or you can say that the Jets were the best on thirteen team of all time. Yeah. They have to be like this is a statement win big time beating a playoff team. They're getting they just ran out of the games. Yeah. Yeah that's right. That's true. Only half the league goes one to know every week. They're part of that team that they're part of the half the league.

Yeah. Do you think that, like Hugh Jackson has Miami Dolphins celebration type thing, like he pops a bottle of cyanide every time that a team doesn't go on sixteen? Yes. Like there has to be some correlation between the those Browns teams and the Detroit Lions.

I'm so pissed that they didn't go and succeed just so that we can't, like, go around saying that Gregg Williams was part of two thirds of the own. Sixteen team to suck.

Yeah, Dr. Heat. But so the Jets this also for everyone is like the jets are tanking. They're trying to lose. You can't do that in the NFL. You cannot like you can't have guys who are all playing for contracts, who are playing a sport like football, go out there and like just half ass it.

They all are playing for pride. They're all playing for tape. They're all playing for their next job. So it's like when everyone says, oh, yeah, they're tanking, yeah, they're bad teams, but no one's trying to lose purpose.

No, you just you have to look into. Losing all your games are higher, Hue Jackson, those are the only two options, that's it. That's the only way that the NFL can smell out inauthenticity and they can tell when a team is trying to tank. And just because of the way that things work out, you're going to end up fucking it up for yourself if you actively try to do that. Yeah.

So I don't really know what the Rams are doing. I don't know what Sean McVay was doing. It felt weird. They felt like they weren't like they've been behind a couple of times this season. Like they just you think that they're going to come back and they just don't do it. And then I also saw that Sean McVay called Adam Gase this week at seven fifteen in the morning. Adam gave his time. So for West Coast did not start.

He probably stayed on the West Coast because they played against Seattle last week. No, no, I'm against yeah, yeah. The Jets were out there on the West Coast. Nobody Adam Guy said it was seven fifteen his time, so maybe they came back. He was probably in the same time zone and just added in might in my time he might have been. But anyway, on Adam Gase time, it's like the exact opposite. Of course on time you're always late for everything.

Yeah.

So he Sean McVay called him and was like, hey, the guys are playing really hard for you. Like, stay the course.

Why would you do that? Why would you give them a little boost? Well, he was trying to give him a boost and have it like go against them, but it didn't work. I don't know.

Was it because I to do that? Well, I've got a couple of theories. Maybe maybe there was some monkey business going around and maybe Sean McVay was trying to help out his good friend, Bill Belichick, who he also talks to every week.

Right. And helping Belichick keep Trevor Lawrence out of the AFC East.

Hmm, interesting. And trying to gas them up a little bit. I actually this is so Jets fans I know are probably very upset today.

Well, hang on. I'm connecting all the dots. The Patriots Belichick lost to McVay with the stipulation that McVeigh would pay it forward and lose to the Jets. Yeah. So Belichick gets here. Things have a way of evening and their way out when you when you control everything in the world. Yeah, Amy Adams wrote that.

That's that's what I'm that's my theory in West Texas.

So Jets fans don't want to hear this because obviously they've been thinking all year.

Trevor, Trevor Lawrence, Trevor Lawrence, Trevor Lawrence. Is it crazy to say that the Jets might not want to take a quarterback with the second pick?

Yeah, I'm not really sold on like Trevor Lawrence. I'm sold on one hundred percent. The other guys I could sell myself and guess what they also have on who's going to be there in the two hole is the kid from Oregon, Sewell, who's going to be an awesome offensive lineman. Is it not crazy to say the Jets just went macci back? Then they get Prasa Sewel from butchering his name from Oregon. They now have two awesome offensive linemen.

It's him. Maybe get him for cheap, maybe like Sam. Do you want to be a jet all your life? You've sucked here, sign here. It's not that much money. You protect him now, which is their biggest issue. I don't know. I feel like the reaction to this loss is. All right. Well, now, Justin Fields. But what if they don't? What if you don't go Justin Fields? What if you go the other way and say, hey, let's build up the offensive line, which smart teams do, and see if Sam Donald, because he's probably going to be somewhat cheap because he hasn't played that well, maybe you can just extend that and keep trying with him.

In theory, that makes a lot of sense. But it's the Jets that we're talking about here. I don't know. I just want to our good friend and resident quarterback guru Billy Football has to say about Justin Fields.

I don't I'm not sold on any Ohio State quarterback. No, that's fine. But truth is a better quarterback. But actually so this was my favorite for the Jets. This was my favorite take that Billy had today. Billy said, without a trace of irony or sarcasm, that Trevor Lawrence, even if the Jets had the number one pick, Billy would not take Trevor Lawrence because Trevor Lawrence is one too much in college. Yeah. So he's not going to be used to coming into a losing environment and having to deal with all the pressures that come along with like having to having to deal with defeat all the time.

So according to Billy, you should never draft a quarterback who's been successful before if you have a bad shot.

He's always had a supporting cast, unlike Justin.

OK, who has, I guess, lost a lot in college?

I think he's had a little more like basically what where. Yeah. When versus what. Well, I'm saying just if you only play six games, make more of what adversity it would be able to make more offense in the Jets.

Sort of the subfields lost one game. Right. You also one game.

If you take Trevor Lawrence and then just put him on the Jets, I think he's sort of going to be like, oh shit type moment where he realizes that this isn't Clemson and the Jaguars are, I think Clemson.

I think the Jaguars have a better situation really than the Jets. No state income tax. Exactly. Yeah, but I you know what I like. I like. Thirdly, I'm going to sign up for it. I just don't know if Lawrence is one, he's one too much in college to be successful.

I feel like the reaction is obviously like Justin feels we will just move to that.

But why not just not take a quarterback and just see if Samdhong can maybe get a little bit better and maybe actually put some weapons around him and have him behind an offensive line? I don't know.

I think I think, Sam, if you think that Mr. Besuki is scarred and you love him so much that you'd like to see him leave. I feel like Jets fans feel the same way. It's like, yeah, he could be good. But you know what? Not here, but see that they're going to make somebody so very happy one day.

So the difference is, Mr. Bychowski, and this is not of any knowledge, but I'm just guessing he doesn't want to be in Chicago anymore because, you know, the Bears benched him, that naggy benched him like it's not gone.

Well, Sam Donaldson said last week he wants to be a jet his entire life. He's like, I want to finish my career as a jet. Yeah, I think it's a little different when you have the quarterback that you haven't benched yet, Mitch. It's what you bench your guy. It's it's kind of over. Yeah. You know, it's hard to come back from benching a guy and then being like, no, actually, just kidding. If you're still our guy, if Sam Donald actually feels that way, then yeah, that's one thing like eagles.

But if I were Sam Donald, like, they're just too many bad memories. Everywhere I look, I would be seeing ghosts all he said that he said he wants to stay on the jets.

He's like, I want to finish my first jet. So there's actually another good Segway. Look, could you ever. We'll talk Eagles. Cruddas, could you ever imagine Carson Wentz Like, I can't imagine Carson Wentz starting for the Eagles again?

Well, he said that I think Doug Peterson can imagine starting for the Eagles again. I think Tom hates Doug Peterson has again refused to commit to a quarterback after this game. Yeah. So, like, who knows what's going on in his in his head, but he just I guess he just can't make up his mind. But Carson Wentz said after the game that he wants to remain a Philadelphia eagle, much like Sam Donaldson.

But he said before the game he doesn't want to be a backup. You're right. So which is crazy because you play like a backup. But who knows how that report came out?

Like, I was probably maybe his agent said that. I don't know, but he, like, contradicted that after the game.

So things are all over. I think he contradicted it because Carson Wentz saying, I don't want to be a backup. And everyone being like, dude, you're playing like a backup. Don't play like a backup. And he won't be a backup. He look like a clown. So he had to walk it back and like, no, no, I want to be on the Eagles. Right. But then he's probably telling his agent, trade me because I don't want to be a backup.

Right. He's not I don't think that you'd want a quarterback that would be happy with being benched. Yeah. Ideally, like he's Carson Wentz is not going to accept, like, a backup role somewhere this offseason.

And Jalen hurts like the team. I don't know. They just look a lot more alive.

I don't understand what Carson Wentz do to Eagles fans to get them like they all have Stockholm Syndrome. I the one of our video guys, Max, he was out there watching the game us.

And I said to him, I was like, look how good Jalen Hurts is like, do you think everyone on the Eagles hates Carson Wentz like normal Carson Wentz is still like, good. And then what do you want Carson Wentz to play right now? I know, but and I asked him, Sherpa's, would you rather have the Eagles win this game with Jalen Hurts or Carson Wentz?

And he's like Carson Wentz like something about Carson.

Wentz has every Eagles fans in Detroit because they got well, first of all, they they drafted him with a what the number one overall pick or whatever it was. Who was it to two. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The second overall pick. So like, that's a guy that you've you always want to be in love with that guy. You always want to think like, yeah, we were right to do that. I feel good about that draft.

In retrospect, you want to go back and look at all the haters that that downgraded you on draft day and like and take screenshots of the bad draft recap articles. Why did you give the Eagles a C on draft, which he was a starting quarterback in a season when they won?

That's true. That is true.

I think they feel responsible for sort of making him bad because they were mean to him.

Well, basically, when Nick Foles won the Super Bowl in Philly, fans have that, like feeling of, you know, you're talking about my guilt. Yeah. Yeah. No, that's wrong. City. Yeah.

Well, why are they have such an attachment to I don't know, it's a one off brotherly love.

They want him to succeed because they want to believe that he could have won that Super Bowl and he's the continuation of that.

Yeah, it's like a combination. They don't want to admit that they got anything wrong on draft day. And they also don't want to admit that they were wrong to run Nick Foles out of town. But again, like if Nick Foles stuck around, like Nick Foles sucks, you know, he's not I think that there would be more frustrated. Nick Foles, like Philadelphia Sports Talk Radio, would be clamoring for Carson Wentz if they had kept Nick Foles around somehow and made him the starter and kept Carson Wentz as the backup, which Carson Wentz needs to have a little better understanding of the dynamics of sports talk radio in our nation's mid-Atlantic region, because if he just sticks around long enough, he's the backup, he's the backup.

And yeah, the first sign of adversity, they're going to love every city in America. Yeah, he's just a little short sighted, just like give it. Time, trust me, if I know Eagles fans, they will they will go back to liking the backup quarterback soon enough.

Yes, this game was awesome, though. Cuyler versus Jalen hurts. Oklahoma quarterback, seven touchdowns combined, almost. The Eagles almost found a way to win it.

Also, the Cardinals defense, Vance Joseph is a very good defensive coordinator. They're playing very good defense, like they're giving up some points, but they're sacking the quarterback. I don't know. I just want to give him a little credit on life. Yeah, yeah.

My brain is so twisted. I thought that the football team beat the Cardinals last week for a little bit today just because it was in that stadium. Like I've counted that in my mind as being a Cardinals win defense, that this is the first time since twenty eighteen that. No, I'm sorry. Yeah.

The Eagles have not beaten a bird team since September six twenty eighteen when they beat the Falcons. That's a lot.

So I think they're like oh an eight or something like that against bird teams. Real problem. Real problem up there.

Real problem for team. Larry Fitzgerald had a nice little touchdown. Yup. His it was nice touchdown. And Larry Fitzgerald like he's got a big but he's an ass businessman and he got one cheek down like a smaller smaller ass man would not have had that touchdown.

Right. But a nice little imprint. Yeah. We're all thicknesses.

I don't know what the Eagles are still alive somehow. Right. Are there. Yeah, they're stable. And so there's a lot if if the football team loses out, the Giants lose out and they win out, they can still make it OK.

I mean, it's a possibility.

Yeah, it is. It's and I need the cardinals to lose now. I'm rooting heavily, heavily against cardinals.

That's kind of all I had for this game.

That's about it. It was a chaos game. Arizona has a nice chaos stadium. They put like late late Sunday afternoon Arizona. That stadium might fill the void of fill rivers.

Well, yeah, because it's I mean, that's where the Seahawks and Patriots, ever since that that game actually know it before that, even when it was like the old shootouts between the Cardinals and the Packers. Yeah, of course. Roger Moore. Yes. Yes.

I think it's just it's a chaos stadium. It's so late, late in the afternoon Chaos Stadium, which are kind of like.

All right, last up, Chief Saints. She's so fucking good.

The chiefs are twenty two and one in their last twenty three games.

It's pretty good that's put it to me in calendar year, year and a half, year and a half to gun 22 and one.

That's incredible. Yes.

And Patrick Mahomes, somehow you think he's done all the stuff. You think that there's no more stuff. The Mahomes can do more stuff. And then Andy Reid is like, hey, I got a new thing that you can do.

And whether it's doing the Dr Pepper Skills Challenge, shovel chest pass to Travis Kelce or throwing laterals to Le'Veon Bell, throwing passes to like the offensive tackle eligible like he's there's no more stuff to do.

The lateral. The lateral. I think I tweeted like he's just playing a different game. He really is like that. Yeah. Any anyone else does that play into like how stupid is that. He doesn't you're like whoa it worked and it was awesome. Yeah.

I mean and the thing about the Chiefs offense is, you know, that they're going to take one of these new things that he did and then have that be like a fake element in a play that they run next week. Lateral, right. It'll be like a fake. It'll be like a shovel pass to Travis. Kelsey, who throws it behind his back to Tyreek Hill. Yep. Scores a touchdown and drink seven airplane bottles of pickle juice. Yep.

And Cheesa are kind of letting I feel like they just let teams, they, they've killed the Bucs and I feel like they killed the Saints but they just kind of let them back in for the back door.

Yeah. The Saints were hanging around a lot. It was it was a bad game for the but it never really felt like the chiefs were out of control of it. Are we worried at all about Drew Brees?

Well, for eleven on third down, he started the game over five.

He looked so bad he wasn't he wasn't even able to throw his normal Drew Brees like three yards swing pass.

Do you think maybe his shoulders hurt are his ribs? I have a new Saints.

Saints fans probably hate me now because I just keep coming up with these stupid theories. But I think Michael Thomas hates Drew Brees. Hmm. He was Michael Thomas was playing. He was on the air with Drew Brees, was healthy. He was on the I punched. Right. Our cornerback in practice, Drew Brees got hurt and there was a little bit of overlap. Drew Brees gets hurt, he plays, doesn't get hurt. Then Drew Brees comes back.

He goes right back on the air. I think he's trying to avoid Drew Brees.

You think they just don't like each other? Yeah, I think he's trying to avoid them. I guess. I mean, that's as good a possibility as anything else. I think that's more likely than his ribs, not. Do you think that his ribs aren't hurt at all? No, I think his ribs are hurt. I just think his shoulders also hurt. They did make a big deal about like all the different flak jackets he was wearing. And you could tell, like Drew Brees, I personally think that he's lost about thirty five pounds in the last year.

He just ribs alone. He looks skinny. Yeah. Yeah. And like he's just he looks emaciated out there. Yeah. Yeah. But I think maybe some of that was the flak jacket was pushing the shoulder pads up, made him look like he was, you know, like 110 pounds soaking wet.

I also I mean, and still the Saints are definitely in the Super Bowl, like they can get to the Super Bowl. They still have. They they actually made Mahomes kind of run for his life a little bit. Their defense is still very good if they can essentially just figure out a way to survive. Drew Brees going to Lambeau, which again, I don't know if his body can handle it.

No.

Well, they can't handle the pressure of being on an airplane. Yeah, that's you're not allowed to fly with broken bones. You start driving right now. Yeah. Get up there. Take a bus up there. Taysom Hill will play the first two rounds.

You think Andy Reid, when he was like when he found out Drew Brees, he's like, yeah, his ribs are tender, his mouth starts to water. He's a capital. I mean, he really Reid is definitely considered eating Drew Brees today. Yes. Yes.

Figuring out to all those ribs the best way to prepare would probably be just like the feel like he'd say to him, maybe brazen.

Yeah. Maybe maybe maybe put them in a big green egg.

Yeah. Yeah. Maybe a little catch up on top overnight. The chiefs are just so good though. I don't know. So we're at this weird point now where it's I feel like a lot of people don't want to just say, hey, the chiefs are going to win the Super Bowl again because we want there to be intrigue.

And also stating the obvious is lame. But usually when the Super Bowl.

Yeah, I don't see a way that maybe the bills, maybe those maybe those bills. Maybe those browns. Yeah, but chiefs bargain with the chiefs. Yeah, they're going to Patrick Mahomes with an eye patch would still be the best quarterback in the NFL. It's great. Look, if you confiscated one of his eyesight's, he would still be, I think. Yeah, I just think that he's like that much different than there. Is that a phrase?

Yes. That difference built. He's built different that if you made him close an eye, he'd probably still be able to do seventy percent of the shit that he does right now, which it's just not. It sucks for everybody else. It's not the chiefs just knowing, like chiefs are probably going to win half the Super Bowls the next ten years. I was actually going to ask you what at what point are we going to start hating Chiefs fans?

It's not we're not there yet, but it's going to happen. And I hope Chiefs fans, I hope you. No, this fence, you can't win and have America still love you. The problem is eventually we're going to reach their most notable fans, Paul Paul Rudd, who's the most likable person in the world. I know.

Fuck that guy. So maybe. Yeah, I think we need to have, like, one of their biggest fans have some terrible scandal.

The guy from the show, the guy from the show on the right is a cheese fanatic.

Right to choose, you know, the guy from the show Modern Family. Which guy? The fat guy.

Does anyone who Cam. Cam, he's she said she felt when we said Paul, right.

Yeah. Paul Rudd. Nicest guy ever. A little too nice. What's he hiding?

Well, he dated his underage sister and clueless.

Who else? That's true. People don't talk about that. Uh, who else?

I think that's about it. Joe Buck Jackson Mahomes. Yeah, Jacksonville. We need Jackson to come out. Oh. Have like a big winter online for people to get really riled up. What's his name.

Fuck. I'm Rob Riggle. Rodriguez Chiefs fan.

Rob Riggle. Jason Sudeikis.

OK, Rod, this is the problem is these guys are just too nice.

Yeah, it's Rob Lowe is Rob Lowe is going to start being a cheese fan. God damn it. All right. Well, Chiefs fans, look, we don't hate you yet, but I'm just I'm just giving you the warning that you guys are too good and eventually America will turn up and the other happens to everyone.

The other problem is the team is almost too fun to hate. Yeah, I know that they would have to not only have some sort of massive pizza style blow up amongst their entire fan base, but also like completely play a different style football. Right, right.

So we'll see. We'll see. They basically do they have the one seed kind of locked up. Not right.

Who do they play? Who's who's who who do they have left on their schedule?

Find that for us, Jake. I think it's probably it's got to be like the the Broncos. Maybe they already played. They play the Chargers. Actually, the Chargers kind of gave him a good game. Remember that? Home Falcons, home Chargers, home falcons.

So they're on the table. Yeah. So they got the one seed, whatever. All right. Let's do our football guy the week before we do that. Pfft. Richie Yeah.

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OK, football guy the week Jake. So the most nominated thing I got tagged in all year long was the heart attack high school coach, right. Yep. Second was this Lions Center, Frank.

Now the throat fracture suffered the fractured throat. Yeah. And he's OK.

So, yeah, I think if you're a Synergix, you have to do you have to communicate verbally during games. I'm pretty sure you have to call it the mike. Right, right. So how does he how is he doing that? I think he was writing on a piece of paper and slipping it past just just using ESP to the other line pointing at him. Yeah. GRUNTING So he's our first nominee.

He's going to win it. Probably friend of the program, Sean McVay, who spent his off day last week watching 12 straight hours of football on the Redskins channel. And his fiancee asked if he wanted to do anything else. He said, nope.

OK, well, first of all, Sean McVay, you're a fraud because it's not 12 hours of football on the Red Zone channel. So anyone that's ever watched the RedZone channel, we know that they started by saying, what, seven hours of commercials before?

I don't know, seven hours? No, I'm talking about Hanson says I don't seven hour longer. My life is a commercial free.

Football starts now. So Sean McVay, football card revoked. Mm hmm.

Next, Nebraska linebacker Garrett Nelson. This was actually nominated nomination courtesy of Bill Compton, who you mentioned earlier, who played through missing two teeth after a tight end put his shoulder into his jaw. He said he put some straws in there once in a while and it's pretty fun.

That is fun.

It was a good time to see too many. And then, as our friend Chris Long would say, a hockey player could never.

Yeah, a little feel good story. Colts punter Rigoberto Sanchez resumed punting duties today with Indianapolis just 20 days after getting a cancerous tumor surgically removed.

OK, football, go we go vote for it. Some good nominations this week. Good nominations. Do we do Baby Brown of the week or do we just say it's Charlie Woods because it's Charlie Watts?

Yeah, it's probably Charlie. Probably Charlie would probably. Charlie, why are people fawning over Charlie and Dez Bryant? And. That's right.

I'm I feel mildly uncomfortable with the Charlie Woods. I think it's great. Charlie Woods, awesome golfer. Pretty cool to see him out there playing.

Well, the level of like we need more video of Tiger Woods son.

It's all what in people's defense they were promoting this event, but not showing it. Wait, what it's like wasn't on TV.

It was like a delay. So it was like people were seeing the social clubs. But you can't find the actual broadcast of it until later in the hour. So that is also kind of weird.

I'm saying it's like we're reliving time. Yeah. And completely forgetting all the lessons.

Let's make sure that words are our savior. Yeah.

Golf and he's what, eleven? Let's put all of our hopes and dreams on Charlie Woods tiny little shoulders.

This won't fail. He'll become a well-adjusted adults like his dad.

I hope that he gets so hyper competitive that he actually hates playing with his dad because he keeps losing with him.

Yeah, yes, yes. Although do you see that swing? He probably beat Tiger now. I mean, two hundred fifty yards on a fucking rope. He did that. Well he put it within like four yards.

Yeah. Yet the pictures were amazing. It looked like, like a crazy expensive Nike ad. My question is, when they practice, do they intentionally just always swing the club at the same time? Because every single clip that I've seen. Yeah. Has them warming up. And yeah. It's like synchronized swings. Yeah. Is that like that's probably intentional. Yes, it has to be.

Don't quote me on this, but I think I've heard once that it's bad etiquette at the driving range to swing at the same time as the person next to you.

Oh yeah. I don't know if that's that's a bold statement by you know, don't quote. No, I'm going to quote when I hit the range, I try not to swing at the same time as the person.

So are you you're like a like a super nice guy. Are you blaming Tiger or Charlie?

We say that Charlie is bad for the eleven year old Jewish Charlie. What about he's the Riley Curry of golf. Have some balls.

Blame the eleven year old. I don't know. God, let us know. Yeah.

Or should we talk a little college football. So the final fours out it is Alabama one, Clemson two, Ohio State three. Notre Dame for Texas A&M fans are mad. Cincinnati fans are mad, which I can kind of actually understand. Cincinnati fans. Do you have any takes about Cincinnati fans?

No, just in general. I think they got it right. Yeah, they probably did. But if you're in Cincinnati, just take this to you can claim your own national title. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. Just by all means, like this is your chance to be Yusif.

Go in your ball game. We played and we played.

We went undefeated. Yep.

The schedule wasn't that soft data they had like a problem was that all the teams they played ended up kind of sucked. Yeah, but that's not their fault. You kind of sucked you Skaf had a down year player. Do you play.

Yeah, but still, if you're Cincinnati, take this occasion, you have a national title. Yeah they yeah. I mean I always I've been repping Cincinnati all year. I thought they were a good team.

It's, I get it, I get it because people are like well can get killed by Bama but everyone would get killed by Bama in that spot.

And if we're going to reward resume, the team had a better resume than Texas A&M. I'm sorry, but it's just it's a fact.

It's the people who actually have a gripe I'm going to get mad for Indiana fans should be upset.

And they have a right to be upset because Iowa State has lost three games and they're going in New York, New York, six Bowl and Georgia lost two games and they didn't beat anyone. And they're going to win New Year's six bowl. Indiana should have gone to New Year's sixth bowl. They should be ahead of a three loss Iowa state team.

It's stupid. That part is stupid. You have every reason to be upset about that. And Ami.

Yeah, if you're an Army guy and out there, like, we're not getting to respect the troops, Mississippi, they would not enforce this bowl and they're three and seven.

That's wild. Well I mean, yeah, everyone gets a bowl game. The Wisconsin playing in the mail bowl.

But how are you not going to put all our resources. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know that that makes no sense. Bowl season is going to be very weird this year. We're in Wisconsin playing against Wake Forest. They'll be on Smale Bowl. That'll be sick. If it was like Wisconsin against BYU in the mail in the mailbox, yeah, that would be sick.

But yeah, I Indiana fans, you have every right to be upset. It's bullshit. Three lost Iowa State team shouldn't be ahead of you. Georgia didn't beat anyone. And Texas A&M fans. I know you're upset, too, but whatever you lost to Bama by fucking like thirty. Yeah.

And with Notre Dame, it was weird, the timing of the quotes that came out from from Brian Kelly. Yeah. Saying like, I'm not sure if we want to go play in the playoffs if our families can't be there, like he was like nagging them.

Why did he say that before the game? I don't know. Even started. I don't know. I don't know.

And I get it. Notre Dame looked terrible against Clemson, but they still beat Clemson earlier in the year and their win against USC was very impressive. So I don't know if they have a good resume there. The four best teams are in and it's going to be Alabama, Clemson. OK, so get ready for Alabama, Clemson. If it were up to me, I'd say instead of going eighteen playoff, just have Alabama clubs and play a three game series.

Right. But we play home, home and then one neutral site.

If it goes to the deciding game I'm fine with that and also put arm in because that is fucked up, that army like I want to make a point of that. Like I agree there an entire team of fullbacks that America's team and like you've got South Carolina who fired their coach, Flacco, what are they, two, two and eight?

Yeah, South Carolina is going to a bowl game. Yeah.

Every team gets to go to a ballgame this year. It's kind of crazy. Bowl season just starts today. Yeah. No break. I know. Oh, really? You're going right into it. State North Texas today. Two thirty. Let's go. All right. It's football. We go.

Yeah, no, there's there's still a bunch of bowl games. Going to be very weird. And yeah I that's I yeah.

I don't know really what like the Rose Bowl is not going to be or sorry the semifinals are not going to be the Rose Bowl. I don't even know if the Rose Bowl is happening.

They moved it from the Cherrie's. Yeah.

Yeah. So they are still going to call it the Rose Bowl. I think so.

That's the Rose Bowl game. I like that. I kind of like officership. That's like that's that's such a tall move that I kind of like the fact that it's give me the Rose Bowl in Texas while the Olympics are twenty twenty Tokyo.

So. Oh really. Right. They know we're redoing twenty twenty one. Oh yeah. But they're still being called the twenty twenty.

I mean they the Rose Bowl has been played in North Carolina before, in 1942 after, after Pearl Harbor. So I guess there's precedent to have the Rose Bowl in a different place. But yeah, this and then I don't know what's going to happen with the Heisman. I was tweeting about a lot on Saturday and I bet Trevor Lawrence twenty to one to win on Thursday or Friday.

So hopefully, yeah, he wins, but I don't think he will. I was just doing it because I was hoping that there's enough stupid college football voters out there. Oh, there are. Didn't watch any of the college football. And then they see the names, they're like, who's Matt Jones? Oh, but I know Trevor Lawrence.

I mean, I think that the whole conversation about the Jaguars getting the first overall pick and it being a lock for Trevor Lawrence gets that narrative out there enough for everyone.

How could you know, like the number one pick? You guys, he's the best player in college football is fact.

It's a fact. All right. Let's finish up the show we got who's back of the week to finish this up. And then reminder, we have a show on Wednesday this week. No show Friday. That's Christmas Day. We'll be back Monday and Wednesday, Monday for next week because we're going to recap week sixteen.

That's a regular show. And then Wednesday will be best stuff.

So that is our schedule for the next two weeks. Who's back of the week brought to you by McDonald's? The McRib is back. He's been eating the McRib punch. The McRib is the most important sandwich of the year. McRib is officially back and available for a limited time at participating McDonald's. Some cities get the McRib every year, but others have gone up to seven years without the McRib. The longer places have without it, the more outcry for it to return.

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Yep. All right. So go and check out the McRib. A limited time at participating McDonald's. Hey, who's back this week?

Who's back the week? Is those moral cheating scumbags over at dude perfect?

Oh, that was, you know, who's back of the week?

Damn, they. The Dr. Pepper challenge was back kind of this weekend. Not really, but dude, perfect for whatever reason. Hosted. Yeah. Is one of Dr. Pepper challenges. Hosted all of them. Not all of them.

One was Brady Quinn versus Matt Lauer.

Yeah. Like I was it seemed like some of them more virtual than the one I watched was dude perfect. Anyway, I'm watching it. The girl on the left, Shammari, was just throwing darts, had a comeback win at the last second, was tied seven seven last second, threw it in. It went in. She scored at the buzzer. They disallowed it, said it didn't get off in time, even though there's a screenshot clearly showing that the ball is released with time on the clock.

It went to overtime and she lost to a kid named Tate. So it's just like, clearly, dude, perfect had an agenda. They didn't they didn't want to let this go when they made sure they're fucking tape. Oh, dude. Perfectly Tate bullshit. Yeah. One hundred twenty five grand taking money away from this girl who needed it. They looked around and dude perfect was like, we're missing one thing and that's a tape we've got. And Bourdeau, by the way, put himself front and center.

Oh I was doing perfect your thing. Like I never realized how much tall guy and Purple Hoser carry dude. Perfect. Yeah. Until I was subjected to instant. Yeah. They're pretty good. They're nice role players. Yeah.

But like seeing Bourdeau solo. Oh it's strictly Brdo makes it about himself.

It was disgusting. It was, it was honestly sickening. I felt ill watching him hog the spotlight while the twins were like an afterthought. I think I saw the twins in like one drone shot when they had when Berro was going out on his motorized skateboard, like avoiding all the obstacles and then making it all about himself, throwing a trick shot in from half court. Yep. Before we're here to watch these kids try to earn free school for themselves, it was it was disgusting because there's no I in, dude.

Perfect.

Yeah. I don't know how they sleep at night. Honestly, it's gross. It's gross. I don't even go back to the replay like that. You know that girl Wednesday. Yeah. There's a day. Yeah. She she could have gone to college and cured cancer. Yeah. Congrats dude.

Perfect semester. Yeah. You got butterfly effect world killed. Millions of people do.

Now she's going to have a bunch of like one hundred million years, you have a bunch of tuition, you know, loans that she, she then has to take whatever job out of college is to pay the loans instead of maybe becoming a doctor.

Like you ruined everything. She ruined everybody. It's really sad, dude. Perfect is an indictment on the entire American educational.

Yep. Yep. Fifty. So that was your who's back because. Well I was considering talking about dude. Perfect. Yeah. Yeah that'll be my husband. OK. Yeah. My whose back is Martin Shkreli. Recurring guest. Kind of weird that this happened after we talked about him the other day, but he's actually trending right now. I can't wait to read this story tonight. So apparently there is a journalist who spent a year interviewing him and fell in love with him and got divorced, moved out of her house, all because she fell in love with Martin Shkreli.

It looks like a wild story. You're missing.

You're missing the best part. Yeah, he ghosts, sir.

Dude, you just said I was going to read it.

Well, people at home are going to read it, but I was going to write, won't they? I'm sure.

Well, that's a funny story. A lot of people will read this. It's like, OK, I won't it's the biggest story out there right now. And I it does look like a wild ride. I'm like this. This lady threw away her entire life for Martin. To be fair, Martin Shkreli is like super charming and incredibly hot like that dude is. Man, that guy's got all going on.

It's why did Christy Smith upend her life and stability for Martin Shkreli, one of the least like men in the world? Probably because he fucks men. Men are not sure who's back, Billy.

So. Right. Yeah, you can find Jose Canseco is my champion.

Jose Canseco is trying to beat up big cat. Well, all right. Back on the Yeah. Back story.

So two years ago, two years ago, I think Jose Canseco is going get A-Rod for something. I was like, I might have to fight Jose Canseco, a rough and rowdy. Now, I. I think we talked to him or something. There was some kind of weird stipulations. Either way, Jose Canseco is now calling me a coward. Listen, dude. Yeah, I probably am at this point hand up. There's a couple of things that have happened in those two years.

One, I got two years older, too. I became a father. Three, I we did the Penn deal. And I don't need the. As much as I did two years ago, that's just stating facts. So if you want to call, if you add all that up and be like, hey, you're a coward, I'll fucking put my head up and be like, I'm a coward. I don't care. Call me a coward, whatever.

Just play the dad card all day. Well, I just I don't I will if that is a coward, that I will absolutely say I am a coward. Hand up. But I have found a champion in my place. Learn Game of Thrones Hosie. Ever heard of it? My champion is Billy Football. I will have him fight in lieu of me, which I think is that's those are the rules.

Like if I can find a champion for me. Yeah, for sure. Billy is fighting for my honor. He's ah. You're a fall guy.

Right, right. And you have to fight six for 250 pound Jose.

All right. So here's here's you. I'm ready. I'm ready for now. Billy is Billy is obsessed with size, just like in general in the animal kingdom. Billy has a weird thing where he he respects Jose Canseco. Is mass so much that he's like his duties just big. So you think that he can have you watch him fight? Yes. Fight.

Billy thought Billy is less concerned about Jake Paul, who actually wants to be a professional boxer because Billy thinks he's an inch taller than him than he is. Jose Canseco is fifty six years old and looks infighting fights.

Well, just like in in lieu of things like if I were to get into boxing match with Jake Paul, I have a little weight on him. If we got into those like wrestling things where they, you know, link up, like I'd be able to like toss around and like make sure I don't die.

You guys are huge. I'm no, I'm totally right now I've thought about it. So let's say you're like, I'm I'm a coward. Hand up whatever. I don't care. Call me all the names. But I have my champion. He is Billy Football. He will fight in my place.

I have a sneaking suspicion that Jose needs this fight more for his own relevancy at this point in his career. So either you can fight Billy football or we can just be like I'm a coward and move on. Yeah. All right. Those are easy options.

So, Billy, I know you're a little intimidated by him, but you have to get past that. Jose. Jose, probably my guess is he's probably going to take steroids before this fight. Yes.

Get he's he right now he looks like you. You left a basketball in the sun for weeks, you know, for he's not to this point.

So I'm like, I'm not. So he can't afford steroids.

Worse comes to worse. What if I went what if I would have I. Jose, Billy, don't listen this part. Yo, dude, stop calling me a coward online. I'll pay for your steroids.

That's a good deal.

I might dmm say that like hey Kiki quit it with the coward shit put like steroid buffet on me. I think he would take no Jose.

It's probably more important to Jose to be allowed to call somebody cowardly, just trying to get money, judging by his past financial methods that he's used.

Well, the options on the table, Jose, he's also a world class snitch. People don't talk about that with him. Yeah, he's a rat fink.

Yes. All right. So you'll fight him or we'll stop talking about it. Yeah, like, that's that's one of those ones that, like, listen, either do it or no, because I think I said this two years ago. I was what? I fell asleep for twenty two minute nap on Saturday. That's like my only nap all week. And I woke up and I was like, what is going on? Where's this clip from. Oh, two years ago.

So that's Bill. You are my champion.

So I'm not scared him worst comes to worst. Run away in the ring and just get out alive.

No, no, but I will. That's at this point, I'm not scared of him. But if I do fight him, I will try to avoid basically I'm not going I'm Muslim.

I'm going to use my athleticism and basically youth to beat him. It's not going to be an easy task. It's going to take a lot of training. I'm like hyped because I finally have another athletic goal in life and need those because there it's always more fun, stuff like that.

That's really where I fall off because I think I if I can put myself back in my time of life when I said that, I think that was right. When I was like, hey, this will be my last shot of trying to get in shape. That is passed.

I'm done with that. Yeah. That whole like, hey, maybe if you work out really hard you can get it back like that. Once you have a kid, it's OK.

And don't sell yourself short. You you ran a marathon with zero days training, right.

It's sort of a freak athlete. Yeah. Yeah. It's not like if we're being honest, I'm kind of like athlete. Billy might be one of the best athletes of all time.

No, not actually but fighting the human steroid. And I'm not going like outmuscle him.

So I go, well you might because you might also take steroids, I don't think which I would pay for as I recently don't pay for all this recently discovered that I might have a thyroid problem.

So I need to meet with an endocrinologist in the city for your age. So, you know, I don't have time to discuss his thyroid plus my thyroid.

I think I have a lot of S.H. or something. So if you're an endocrinologist in the New York City area, please, you know, and I will PMS and I will be cat, I will pay for all the steroids in this fight.

I'm not going to do steroids, but I might need to balance out my thyroid thunderclouds to.

Sure. OK, so I'm excited for Bill. Yeah, I'm actually so I don't think it's going to happen because I just don't think he's going to do it.

But I've been dreaming with Jose, and he's it's it's a wild ride. Does he sound like he's going to do it?

Yeah, but there's a he's he was trying to get him on the show before, and I think he said like ten thousand dollars.

Yeah, well, OK. No.

And then his producer kept hitting us up for the next year being like, yo, I heard you talking shit about Hosai on your podcast again. When are you going to have him on?

That ship has sailed, but also just on the regrows are the only people to ever ask for money to appear on the record.

I don't I don't even I don't want to even talk shit about Ozzy because they don't want to even think about like there's nothing more annoying than having someone hit us up and be like, we should come on, but you got to pay us.

Yeah.

I remember reading Jose Canseco book when I was in college, I think sucked actually. My favorite part was when he was like also in the late 80s. I could have fucked Madonna, but I didn't want to because she wasn't hot enough. You, like, tossed that in at the end of one of the chapters. That's actually cause you just turned it down.

All right. So you're good. Clear, which I am a coward. I'm cool with that. Billy is my champion.

I'm like, legitimately, I'm just going to dance till he gets runs out of gas on his head. I'm going to be telling him you're feeling first I shut the fuck up and get him.

Stop talking, OK? Stop talking Billy forever.

Billy called me on Saturday night at like 9:00 p.m. and was like, Dude, are you guys like are you and Dave like like negotiating with these people right now?

I'm like, no, dude, it's fucking Saturday night. We're not doing anything. I would I would honestly like to see the end result of the negotiations if it was just Billy Hosie handling it entirely.

The are the deal would be I'd have to focus on this feedback. They just end up becoming brose. Not one of I was reading his Twitter like he wants to like, go look for Bigfoot.

Oh, no, listen, you know, they say Canseco, the only difference between you and Jose Canseco is you don't have a Triple Crown yet.

I, I actually think Jose Canseco forever, like, there's a lot of bad stuff, whatever. But I think he's legitimately a funny guy.

I've I wanted to do a like this is like seven years ago he wanted to do a campout in his backyard and hunt for Bigfoot.

Dude, I actually after we fight, I told you, be down for that.

You'd be good friends with them. Yeah. You guys, we just make sure that it's him that shows up in school because he's his substitute. Ossian, in the past I've already analyzed the tattoo. Yeah. You got that down OK.

Yeah. Oh, nice. All right, let's send everyone on their way numbers. Happy Friday. Thirty three Monday. Billy Chambers, what's wrong with you? Thirty three. Eight hundred.

Happy ninety nine. Are you asshole one. Eight are saying 33 cows can only walk 30 to.

That's Jose Canseco. Number three was not even funny, cows can only walk upstairs, not down them, they're fucked. We love you guys. Uh.

Looking away, I don't know what to say. I've seen it even with today's data shop. I'm sorry. I'm coming for the love of God. I mean, take me out. I'll be gone. Needless to say about it, to like this, I say to me. The better to be safe than sorry, say to me is the better to be safe and sound. They say just. You open up the door and solenoid for you anyway.

I'm you gonna Johnny take. I'll be gone.