On today's Pardon My Take Week five of the NFL season, we recap a weird day, I don't even know if there are some bad football or some good football was a weird day and it was finished off by.

Well, that's always weird.

The Seahawks never play a normal game and that's what happened. We'll talk about that as well. Dak got hurt. That sucked. So, yeah, we have everything to recap. There was oh, no, there was baseball playoffs. Baseball playoffs.

We'll talk about baseball playoffs, MLS, the missing Sports Illustrated show, person figure skating qualifiers, French Open, the figure skating.

We'll get it all. We'll hit every single sport you can imagine when we start before we it season start in the NBA.

That's true. That's true. Free agency.

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Today is Monday, October 12, week five. What.

What. What. What. Oh. Careful to lose your voice. We start in Pittsburgh, where the battle of one Silvania is renewed. And Ray, Ray, you you get off of McCleod helped the Steelers rushing attack. Vinnie Chase Claypoole and Eric Ebron entourage didn't turn off from the spotlight as they helped Pittsburgh to return.

Oh, yeah, try the Scott football game, and it's I think it's oh yeah. Oh. Travis Scott Fulghum said, send me a cactus Jack, will I want barbecue sauce because we're not going to catch up and they did it. Steelers thirty eight, Eagles twenty nine left and Houston went. Romeo Crennel said Bill O'Brien's seat was hot and her. But who needs Echobrain mask on? You can put a Band-Aid on the season. Too many cooks kept going on and on and on and on.

It was pretty funny then. It got boring, but then it got funny. You got Stephen Smith. Hauschka has the Jaguars bottom feeding the AFC South going on or two from field goal and Juggalo Marone is trying to find a way to get his guys to stop playing like a clown posse before it's too late. Texas starting to drive past Vakhtang.

Some spread up to Kansas City where Henry Lockwood rug's came back from his latest two week vacation and is finally producing again for the Raiders. Josh Jacobs Sartorius instant jam the ball down the Chiefs throats as the Raiders climbed the Nelson Aggro.

Crabbe You are beating the Super Bowl champs and getting all up into Andray Reed's guts do do do do you have it the Raiders forty chiefs started to work well in the Meadowlands We're down drain three thousand Hopkins said Can you drink it. Drink, drink, drink drink it like a Polaroid picture. But all the Instagram photos in the world can't make Le'Veon Bell look like he did. Five years ago. Joe Waka Flocka Flame went hard into paint, hard detained because his deep balls make him look like an asshole.

We will respect him a loss, but it looks like Adam Schefter Grace is deader than dead. As the Jets fall to 015, the Cardinals starting the New York Football Jets time in Atlanta where Fleetwood Matt Ryan said, Now, here you go, Dan Quinn. You say you want your freedom as a Falcons head coaches time in Atlanta is tick. Talking away. Mike Anthony Davis and the Los Angeles Lakers won their seventeen title on Sunday night against an injury depleted team in a fake AIU tournament.

And that is your part of my take NBA title recap. That's an Asterix boom verbal meme for Arthur the Aardvark playing her.

As a falcon following five twenty three sixteen, very topical Teej to Cleveland, where that student became the teacher as Kareem Hunt finished pounding the inside order, stealing one of Philip Rivers signature moves, the Colts are feeling egi now, as the Cleveland coach said on staff and gansky. You already know as a Browns plant our flag as a contender in the AFC. With former Enron stock market to power in San Fran, where less Myles Gaskin was eating up grass and Preston Lacy Williams looked like he was being chased by Wieman.

The 49ers Super Bowl hangover has reached Oh my God, I've never drinking again territory. Xavi and Dwight Howard got an interception in an NBA championship ring and that was the part of my take. NBA title recap. Bobby, John McCain brought his lunch, Palin and got another pick, forcing Kyle Shanahan to say, I like my quarterbacks that don't get intercepted. The sole bright spot for the forty Niners was rookie Kevin White's twenty yard kick return. I've got my eye on him.

As one of Schwab's pro bowlers, the Dolphins trounced San Fran. Forty three seventy boom.

Weren't you in that end zone back in the game with a young Tom Brady and Dwight Clark made the catch, but it was more about oh yeah, no more here back then. Boom. And then the big D where the Cowboys truck said, I don't know how to dak. Slow motion for me, slow motion for me. We don't need to see that move. Even as a fan of Brown University football, I feel awful for Dak Prescott Dorries Rucka, Slayton said, Hold my hand to Daniel Jones.

I say let the quarterback to over half his passing yards on Sunday and give an our. Dalton has been promoted to enter a manager by President Mike McCarthy, who warned the crooked Don't judge, don't drop the soap, don't drop the soap. As he scared Gregs. Our lines last check straight cowboys. Thirty seven. Thirty four. We finish in Seattle, where Steely Dan Bailey in the Vikings said, Are you failing in the year cause of drawing pics at night?

And a touching tribute to my good friend Eddie Van Halen. KYAY right now said I might as well jump just slinging Kirk Cousins over his shoulder like he was a six stringer grill. Distally helped to let Russell Cook as even after Kirk Cousins tried to aluminum foil landing for the Seahawks. Seahawks twenty seven. Vikings twenty six. Woo!

All right, bye, baby love. Monday and Tuesday Night Football. We got Monday. Tuesday Night Football. No, Wednesday Night Football. Yes.

Yes, it could happen. All right. Week five in the books.

We're going to recap every game. We've got Dionna on for about fifteen minutes. Well, they always give Roger Goodell a lot of credit saying, you know, Roger does the right thing and he will not put NFL football on Friday nights competing with the high schools. This year we might get Friday Night Football.

Yeah, we might get Friday football. I still don't. Before we get to Sunday football, I still don't understand. And maybe this is I know you know what this isn't even in hindsight, is 20/20. Why didn't the NFL just schedule an extra week in the middle of the season to be like, OK, best case scenario, everyone just gets an extra bye week or best case scenario, we skip this bye week for the league wide and we go to the next week.

Worst case scenario, like what's happening, every team that has missed a game can make it up in week eight point five. Yeah, well, week eight point five.

The only problem with that is imagine going into that week if there was no football on what.

So is that apple picking weekend, is that when you go out and you go to actually spend time with a family that actually is where we should like that's the future is that we need one week where we basically all freeze football for one weekend, just do a bunch of family stuff, catch up on your sleep, do everything like that, and then you come back and like, yes, this is awesome.

Fans need a halftime two. There should be a second Pro Bowl for the first half Pro Bowl. Right. All right.

Sunday Night Football. The Seahawks have never played in a normal game in their life and it continued tonight. I guess we'll start with the end because everyone there's some people who disagree. We actually 100 percent agree. Together we watch the game and we said, Mike Zimmer, this is a good move. Yep. Essentially, we didn't even do it in a math way. We said, what do the Seahawks want the Vikings to do? They want to kick they want the Vikings kick a field goal because they haven't stopped shit all night.

And then Mike Zimmer, of course, he goes for it, doesn't get it. Everyone says that's the dumbest thing ever. You just gave Russell Wilson the ball back to win the game. He then wins the game because he's Russell Wilson. And we're left with the Vikings saying, how the hell did we lose that KDKA?

Metcalf When the game first and foremost, he came back and then caught it. He dropped it because he didn't want to give the Vikings that much more time left to drive back down the field. So excellent awareness by Dick. He caught the ball in the end zone twice, didn't even get the ball on the one. He actually he caught the ball on the zero yard line. So he's. Making progress, he dropped it on like the half inch line.

Right, so we're getting closer to being able to catch the ball before you cross the line for D.K.. But, yeah, Mike Zimmer, he did make the right call because you do not want to give Russell Wilson the ball back. And, yeah, like people were saying, well, you did give him the ball back. If you turned it over, I would rather be in that situation. If I were the Vikings that you went for, you could have ended the game right there.

And you have a chance to get to. Absolutely. Russell never has the ball again. You also you also make them go ninety four yards, which of course he went did. But versus kicking the field goal, giving the ball to them, they aren't really going to go 70 yards. And then everyone says, well, the worst that happens is your tie. If Russell Wilson is as good as we all think he is and he is that good, he's probably better than what we think he is.

A two point conversion should be pretty easy for him. Of course, people will play the results, not the process. They'll say, well, they didn't get the two point conversion at the end. That's stupid. Were actual analytics sabermetrics guys also to play call like. Dalvin Cook gets that first down he gets hurt, Madison doesn't bounce that outside He's got no vision there which he actually played a nice game but I would do that exact same thing a hundred times out of 100 times because you do not want to, you can win the game.

The Raiders did it, which will get to the Raiders did it earlier where they said we're going to make sure that Patrick Holmes doesn't get the ball back, get it. Making sure Russell Wilson doesn't get the ball back means you have to go for it on fourth down.

And the Seahawks defense stunk. They all night, all night. They could not stop a nosebleed. I think that has a lot to do with the uniforms.

The bright green uniform I saw.

If you look Mike Zimmer, he's got like a quarter of a good eye. Left. Right. He said what, like seventeens hit Mike Zimmer's eyes are the Alex Smith leg of the face. And he's had so many surgeries, even he can see the defense out there and he can tell where the guys are. He can make adjustments because they're the candidates uniforms. I think if you have like a ball hawking secondary, those bright green uniforms are sweet as hell.

If you have if you want a hard hitting defense, no, they can stop it on those.

You know, those uniforms look sweet. No, if they're picking off past.

No, if they go if they go full color rush highlighter, I'm down for it with the tutone is terrible.

They wouldn't have said it the minute they went out. I said fuck, I actually was pissed that I've been on the Seahawks when I saw those uniforms because they just looked ugly. They went half assed on the uniforms for sure. Mike Zimmer is never going to trust a number. As long as he lives it, somebody's going to come up to me like, well, Mike, the analytics say that you should go for it here on third and one and he'll be like, no, you know what?

I'm going to punt. I remember what math did to me last time. Fool me once.

Shame. I don't even think he was doing math. Shame on numbers. Somebody somebody went up to him and I was like, Mike Zimmer, you if you go forward here, you're going you're winning. Percentage is going to increase. And he's like, no, not not going to deal with math anymore. Math is for losers. I'd rather just go with my gut. I don't.

Yeah, I don't think this was a math call. I think it was a we're two for two on fourth down already. We have two hundred yards rushing. All we use is six inches. Kirk Cousins. I mean maybe even fall forward. I like to call. I like to call. Of course it didn't work out for the Vikings. And again, that's a game that they should win like a million times out of a millions because the way they dominated in the first half, they're only up thirteen.

Nothing. You let the Seahawks come back.

I listen, Russell Wilson is incredible. And maybe when Jamal Adams is out there, the Seahawks will look better. But from what I saw from the Seahawks and watching them, you know, I think we've watched every single one of their games. That defense doesn't get fixed. They can't they can't win like they can't go deep in the playoffs.

From that defense that was there was the Vikings had five drives where they had ten plays plus.

Yeah, the entire first half. I think the first quarter the Vikings had the ball for like ninety percent of the time. I'm not going to have Russell Wilson, but I think Mike Zimmer actually did Kirk Cousins a huge favor tonight. Bye bye. Getting all the conversation off of him. We're not talking about Kirk Cousins losing a primetime game anymore because he played overall.

He played well. But add to the list of things that he can't do. Primetime, bright lights, playoffs and rain.

Those are those are the four things that we know for a fact. The pick was bad. He needs to he needs to wear gloves. I think he should rock two gloves, but I think he likes showing off that wedding ring being like, yeah, I act like a virgin. But guess what? I've had sex says it right here on my finger up in your face. But, yeah, the the Seattle Seahawks defense was they looked like a bunch of mall security guards wearing those like bright green, like the guys in the parking lot that say, actually, you know what this spots for expectant mothers right now, please move to the next spot.

They they didn't look like a professional defense. They missed Jadeveon Clowney as well. Yeah, no, no. Jamal Adams. Yeah, they have no I mean, they they missed the Twelve's where everything was. Everything on their defense looked bad tonight.

The twelves I mean, Chris Collinsworth was actually right. I think when he said Mike Zimmer probably would not go for it on that fourth down if the stadium was filled with people screaming. If like Michelle Tafoya was down on the sidelines holding up like a picture of a jumbo jet being like it's loud in this house.

So no screaming at the camera. That was that was a weird thing, though, to bring up being like the crowd, the lack of crowd, I think.

Well, I think he's right, though, because here would be so I guess if you were listening earlier in the game, they Chris Collins were said, I was talking to Pete Carroll and we're talking about the defense and how maybe the defense doesn't have an edge because they don't have that crowd. So he was trying to find a way to rework his research into the conversation. But OK, at least from a fan's perspective, hearing the stadium that loud when Michele Tafoya is screaming at you, I like you when you're mowing the lawn.

I don't care. I still would have gone for it. I would have to, Mike. He would have to. I don't know. I like actually the Vikings, like even in a loss, they look like they have a fight, which is kind of old, especially after the start that they've had.

Yeah. So Dalvin Cook, if he's healthy, he can't say they have the Falcons next week, so guess what, they're going to win next week.

I think that the Vikings are fraudulently bad. I say something nice about. About the Vikings, they're not they're the best, worst team in the league right now, they're the best team. I don't know about that. You still think the Falcons. No, no, no, definitely not. The Falcons are terrible. Falcons are truly, truly terrible team. I'm going to look real quick. I'll give you. I like the Chargers, remember, I switch to I'm down with Justin Herbert.

I'm going to I'm going to bet on him on Monday night and I will get to the Forty Niners. But if they can figure out like a couple of things, I don't know. Yeah, they're in there. It's like the forty Niners, the Cardinals, the Vikings. But I'd say the forty Niners and the Cardinals are like but they're two. And I mean they're like, they're like good terrible today. They're good average teams.

I think the Vikings are a good, bad team. Yeah, I'm looking. Yeah, it would not surprise me if the Vikings beat any team in the Chargers to answer the Chargers and also the Eagles, the Eagles, which we will also get you eagles are going in the NFC East. Absolutely. They're they're going to win if the season ended today.

No. Yes. No. Oh, the Cowboys got first place. Yes, the Cowboys would. All right. Let's get to the rest of the games. We'll start with Panthers. Falcons Dan Quinn has officially been fired. His last play call as a head coach for the Falcons was a field goal in a loss, which is so, so fitting. And here's a little fun. We had the the Browns always firing their coaches after the Steelers loss.

This is now a trend for the Falcons. Arthur Blank has fired Jim Moore Jr., Mike Smith, Dan Quinn, which Mike Smith and Dan Quinn are kind of the same guy like in your head. They're kind of just blend together what one does.

Yeah, Mike Smith is he's got that like Silver Fox and they have the same blank stare.

They've got the same same pecs, same breasts after all of them were fired after loss to the Panthers. So. Well, I guess Arthur blinks little like thing he does.

I knew it was over when Arthur Blank walked down onto the sideline in the fourth quarter and just kind of hovered behind him like like the Grim Reaper's henchmen are the guy that the Grim Reaper since your door to collect somebody, then bring him to the Grim Grim Reaper. Yeah. Like he was just kind of hovering back there.

I knew it was over when they ran Todd Gurley in the first drive of the game and Todd Gurley had fifty nine yards and they went right down the field and scored. And then he didn't touch the ball for the rest of the first half. Yeah, that's when I knew is over when my dad, Quinn coached the Falcons.

The way we think about the Falcons, he's always thinking, well, we have all these wide receivers and no one picks. We have to throw the ball all the time.

He just forgetting the fact that Matt Ryan has quickly become like old, good old quarterbacks that don't have the mobility. They reach a point where they just become the like tastiest treat for the defensive line to sack like Matt Ryan is just the easiest sacked quarterback ever.

But let's give credit to Teddy Bridgewater as well. Teddy Bridgewater. Teddy Bridgewater was great.

One thing about the Falcons, I heard somebody say, Bill O'Brien, that's not happening.

I mean, I might have said Bill O'Brien because they've also fired their GM and their GM was is pretty much Rasputin. Wait, Mr. Dimitrov got fired.

So he's pretty much Rasputin. He can convince any any owner in the league like, hey, I've got the pedigree I was around. I smelled Ernie Adams farts for a few years there. There was a period where I just kind of basked in his glory. And now it's like, OK, I know what I'm doing. You have to trust me, the franchise moving forward. But I don't know I don't know who the Falcons get. I want them to get Mike Leach because he'd be perfect, just like with that offense.

It would be so much fun to watch the Falcons at least lose entertaining games.

I mean, they scored two points on. That's true. That's a that's a good point that they six interceptions, seventy passes, two points they should try to guard. That is very hard. Seventy passes, two points.

The Falcons should try to get a first round pick as their head coach also. That would be great. Byron Leftwich.

Yeah. Dunn was even the first one. Yeah. I'm pretty sure nine percent sure left. Which was it was the first right. There we go. That's missing ingredient.

Yeah. That's, that's perfect. And get Brian left and then it's just first rounders everywhere. I like that. That's great.

Jon Gruden. Jon Gruden got traded for a first rounder so I think he's as close to that counts first. Yes.

Yes, yes exactly. Yeah. Byron Lefferts, seventh pick in the draft, not didn't pan out the way while he was OK for a while.

Yeah.

So Ryan, after the game he said the standard Atlanta Falcons boilerplate line, you have to say this after every loss, we're going to look ourselves in the mirror. You're going to take a long look in the mirror. We're going to just stare at ourselves. We're going to put mirrors. We're going to replace every wall in the facility with mirrors. So we're just looking at ourselves all day and then that'll sort itself.

It's kinky as fuck. Just mirrors on the ceiling. Yeah, well, here's so watch yourself suck. Matt Ryan just wants to make it a crunch.

Fitness. Yeah. There it's tough to see yourself in the mirror if you're a ghost like Arthur Blank. Maybe that's to make the whole place bigger. Arthur Blank can't look at himself in the mirror. Yeah. So Teddy Bridgewater, we got to respect. It's one of my goals.

Teddy to gloves the of I went and looked it up of the active quarterbacks. The NFL right now. Forty minimum starts best winning percentage.

Patrick Mahomes one, Tom Brady to Russell Wilson three. Ben Roethlisberger for Aaron Rodgers five. Teddy Bridgewater six six. He is twenty five. I'm going to count to twenty five and fourteen. He's twenty five. Fifteen is a starter. One of them was weak. Seventeen for the Saints is the backup when they'd already sealed the number one seed in twenty five and fourteen is a starter.

All he does is win and all he does is win is an underdog. He's twelve and ten straight up as an underdog.

That's pretty impressive. Teddy Bridgewater, wonder. Appreciate. He's good to go. Here is just point blank, a good quarterback in the NFL. Guys like him and guys want to play with him. And Matt Rule made funny last week. I think you might be a good coach because you do not have a good roster and your best players out and you're still winning games are three three three wins in a row. It is crazy to think that the Christian McCaffrey was what he's typically 60 percent of that offense.

Yes, or more sometimes.

And without him, there's still winning divisional games is we should come up with like a there's got to be like a theory, like when you lose your best player, but you keep you start winning, but you get better in spite of him.

Right.

Put that on a list, Jake. We'll think of that some other day. The Christian doctrine, the kit, the Christian doctrine. I like that. OK, well, we'll workshop it, though. It's basically when you have the best player on your team gets injured or traded and then your team gets better. Yeah. And maybe it's usually when that player wins like a really good academic school. Right.

Like, well, we don't want to, like, think about God and just throw it out there. Yeah.

So Falcons Dan Quinn, who's the interim, do we know? I don't think we know yet.

Let me see what the coaching staff for the interim for Rich McKay know will be the interim GM.

Raheem Morris looks like Morris remorse.

Dirk Cutter's also on the staff great football named Dirk Kutter. Love that guy. He sucks as head coach, though. He was terrible. Yeah, I don't know, I'm looking at that roster right now, and, I mean, Raheem Morris is the obvious guy. I think he's done it before, right? He's been interim. He's been well, Jakarta's been head coach. Yeah. Yeah. Has he been an interim coach, though? I don't know.

But it is it's always very like this is the problem with having a former head coach with Circular Head coaches.

He was for the bucks, right.

By making that it was during hard knocks.

Yes. He was so admirable. 2016, he Dirk Cutter's, the guy that you might recognize, you're like, oh, is that one of the people from the nationwide commercials where they teach you how not to be a dad? Right. He's like the dad coach.

He jerk. Kutter, you don't want to have Dirk Kutter be your interim head coach and then the Falcons win enough games where you have to hire them. No, that's always a dangerous thing. Like that guy is not a good head coach. Don't do that. Maybe do maybe have your defensive coordinator coach to know head coach.

That's or you know what? There's got to be some guy, some football lifer, special teams, coach, quality control, strength and conditioning, whatever it may be, who has zero aspirations of being a head coach, make him the head coach, knowing that no one's ever going to be like, hey, he should be the head coach next year.

Arthur Blank is the head coach. Yeah, that would work. That would be amazing. Have him play Madden, bring Michael Vick to play, be the head coach.

You knew that Arthur Blank was in a firing mood today when you saw a suit based on all the different accessories that he has on like some people get dressed up to go to a job interview. When you're an owner of a football team, you get dressed up when you know that it's firing day.

There also is you know, people should be wearing masks. You know, to hear me say it, you probably followed John Austine on Twitter. But there are certain people that wear their mask too well. And you're like, that's a mask you want to wear to, like, cut someone up, you know, and like rich guy wearing a mask, like, it's nice, too.

Nice of a mask. You feel a little too comfortable in it. I'd actually prefer you take off the mask, risk me getting the coco and will push aside. You like kidnapping me and cutting me up in your basement.

We are not saying Arthur Blank would do that. No, he's got he can pay somebody to do that for him. Look like it. He's got all the tools. He owned Home Depot for like forty years. He's got several circular saws that he can bring over.

But when he had that mask on, I think he was putting the mask on not for public health issues, but because he was just so happy that he was about to fire Dan Quinn.

They just stand behind grinning on the sidelines are like licking his lips. Yeah, like now is the time I get to do this. And he didn't want America to know that he was taking such pleasure.

Yes, I got the I got the head coach, Jeff Olbrich. Jeff Olbrich should be your new head coach. He's assistant. He's a linebackers coach, assistant linebackers coach. That's who you should get. That's who you should you should promote because he's not ready to be a head coach. And that way you don't have to worry about him like winning some games then being like, oh, shit, now we've got to hire this guy.

Yeah, this guy definitely gives you he gives a Dave Brock. He gives a big, big Dan Campbell vibes, right. Yeah.

Or Bob Sutton, the defensive analyst who looks like he's 90 years old. There we go. You know, all of sudden, I think used to coach Mack.

Yeah. Just have just have your strength and conditioning coach, be the head coach because you've got all the talent. Right. You just need to work harder.

Yep. Just have some, like, little fireplug of a dude on the sideline kicking everybody's ass when they screw up. Yeah.

So. All right. Good luck to the Falcons. Way to go. You fired Dan quit. I'm going to miss you, Dan Quinn. You'll find out. You'll find us. I mean, it's coaching is the the one job they keep you.

Oh, yeah. You're going to be a defense coordinator. Pete Carroll will hire you back. Yeah. And respect Teddy Bridgewater more. OK, next up, we have Raiders Chiefs, the real shocker of the day, the Chiefs. This is so I will talk about this with Dion. But the first thing that came to my mind when the Raiders beat the Chiefs, I said to myself, blueprint game. So I went on Twitter and I was trying to find out, are people chatting about this being a blueprint game?

And I have something even more disgusting for you. OK, people were chatting about it being a blueprint game, but not the Raiders giving a blueprint. Bill Belichick gave the blueprint last week.

He just didn't have the horses to complete. Yeah, the Raiders got the blueprint from the Patriots and then executed the blueprint. And now everyone else has the blueprint, which is essentially have the best offensive line in the game. Run the ball really well. Make a few big plays with Henry Rug's, who is electric.

I can't keep track of the difference between Henry Rug's jury duty and KMB, like Jalen Wato, who's still at Alabama, might be the best of all.

And Meechie. Yeah, mensches.

Kuzio So it's but that's the blueprint. And also just have Patrick Mahomes have slightly off day. Are you worried about the Chiefs?

I'm not. Because Derek Carr I think you're right, by the way, that that they got the blueprint from the Patriots because Jon Gruden absolutely set their car down like it was Clockwork Orange, just open his eyes and made him watch that sack that Brian Hoyer took. It was like, if you do this, I will kill you. Yes. I'm not going to leave you on the tarmac. I might I might, like, tie you down on the.

Tarmac, like an old time cartoon villain, tie somebody to a railroad track and construct a plane to run you over on the tarmac.

That's how and we'll have Mark Davis try to save you. But he's so inept that he'll he'll die, too. Yes.

I can't stress this enough. I will kill you if you do what Hoyer did. So I yeah. I think that there's probably something to that.

But Derek Carr, I think that she's still really good blueprint. The blueprint is Derek Carr had his best game by far as a professional. Well, it was it finally paid off.

Seven years is a seven year bump for Derek Carr.

And and more than that, it's like having rug's because Derek Carr, the big knock on Derek Carr outside of his very tiny little hands, very, very small.

And it's like oily or very, very small. You start a small sense is that he doesn't take risks.

You know, he doesn't take the deep shot, but rug's changes that form. And he was taking a deep shot and he was making the whole offense kind of work better when you can when you can take the top off and that running game and the offensive line is legit.

So, yeah, blueprint game. I think it is a blueprint game.

I think so too. I'm going to withhold any judgment on the Chiefs offensive line because they played like shit today. But I'm not going to talk about Mitchell Schwartz until I see Jeff Schwartz comments on Twitter that it wasn't his fault. Right. So this is me as a national respecting someone who's played the game. I want you to tell me how his brother did, how Mahomes is drifting out of the pocket.

Yes, exactly. Offensive line's fault. Exactly. Not biased. Not because he's a former offensive lineman and his brother's on the team. He's just telling you Mahomes drifts.

I actually do agree. Yeah, he is right about that. I, I do want to say to Jon Gruden, you should not have accepted that penalty earlier in the game. Patrick Mahomes through.

I think the ball went about 75 yards on the air to Tyreek Hill. Who caught it?

There was a hold. Jon Gruden. You love football. I love football. I accepting that penalty.

No, you just deprived future generations. Jon Gruden disagree Janger if he was in Grutness quarterback camp, if he was watching that play, just be nothing you know Tantra you're missing it.

Pfft. This is orgasm five hours.

I Jon Gruden accept that penalty. Not because he accept the penalty because you want to give up a touchdown. He accept that penalty because now that play becomes law for real football guys who can say, you know, the best throw I've ever seen didn't even count.

Yeah. And it's like a fable that you, you know, you whisper to people in in in 80 years, you're sitting in a crackling fire and you're like, I once saw a man thrown seventy yards and it came back for hold on, Mitchell Schwartz. I don't know if it was Mitchell.

Every every real fan has to have one of those plays that will never be featured on a highlight film. And it might be a play that gets taken back. In fact, I can tell you the best play of Jason Campbell's NFL career was against the Cowboys. He rolled out to his left, threw across his body at the goal line, was like seven yards out. And it gave the the ah words at the time a lead, like a four point lead with maybe one minute left in the fourth quarter, something like that.

And then there was a bullshit phantom hold on the right side, the line. But I still remember that. Right.

So this is what makes me feel like I'm doing well. Thank you. Yes. I stand corrected. Yes.

Thank you. Jon Gruden. Jon Gruden. To watch the football community. I'm real. I'm going to remember that. You'll know posers. That is Patrick Mahomes best throw.

He was just play through posers will tell you the Patrick Mahomes throw against the 49ers in the Super Bowl. No. Best throw. No, it was week five. Twenty twenty on a play that didn't even count. Yeah. One minute and 30 seconds into the game.

Listen, my mom saw that throw in the Super Bowl case. You could tell me that was a good throw. Should not watch this week five game in a loss to Derek Carr.

You probably want to hear the hits play where we've been watching this band for a long time.

I made one note about Derek Carr here. I think that he just looks better when he's playing outside. I think know you have inside cats, indoor cats and outdoor cats. Yeah, I think Derek Carr is an outdoor cat. Yeah. He looks way better when he's playing underneath the sun. Well, he usually does play outside. He's now just recently started playing.

Yeah, but I think there's something about the natural sun. It's probably the best scare.

It's like a little black on the oil. Yeah. Yeah I have.

So I threw this out there when we were watching the games. I would take it I'm working on I'm not ready yet. But essentially if people want to help me with this, try to find some film. I think defenders are not hitting Mahomes as hard as they possibly can because no one wants to be the guy that hurts. Mahomes.

Mm, interesting. It feels like when he starts running, there are times in a game where he'll scramble and he'll like they'll almost all agree to give up the play at the same time, like he'll kind of fall into a defender and be like, all right, the play's over. Like we're good here. It's over.

Right. There's certain quarterbacks that get teed off on. Right.

You can tell the defenders like to watch just smoke coming in. Mahomes is not that. I think everyone's like Mahomes is so liked, so loved, so exceptional that if you're the guy who fucks Mahomes up, people will blame you forever.

Who do you think the quarterbacks are that get hit the hardest? Intentionally I. I would say Eli Manning was Jay Cutler, Jay Cutler guy who went at him, he took a few shots. Yeah, you know what we needed just because you know that Fitzpatrick is going to run.

So, yeah, you know Jamous. Oh, my God, they loved hitting Jamous. Yes. Yes.

We need, like Brian Cushing to come out of retirement to settle this because he was the one that would just know.

Yeah, he wouldn't care. He'd go out. He'd hit he'd hit moms'. So you want to come back and just chill and just headhunt. Yeah. Tell everybody I saw Patrick Mahomes drinking a pumpkin spice latte. Like, what the fuck?

Are you fucking serious, bro? 500 million dollars man is drinking fucking coffee. Starbucks bullshit.

All right. So the chief's got our blueprint game. I actually don't think that it's we can also say what we said Deon's as well, that it's good they lost early.

I'm going to say this. It was a wake up call. Yeah. If your chiefs in flirting with this, they flirter with the Chargers, they flirted with the Patriots better. It happens week five than week sixteen.

Seventeen infallible. Maybe. Maybe it's just you you could probably put it under the category of you're going to get the best shot because Super Bowl champs, because what they did to the Ravens makes you think like, OK, they have that gear if they want to.

They just don't want to. Right. Then Travis Kelce tweeted that he has to do better, which thanks, dude. Travis Kelce didn't have like a hundred some yards short, a pretty good game. And he said, that's on me to do better.

Help me translate this. Sammy Watkins, I'm paraphrasing here, he's in a cult, but after the game, he said everything happens for a reason. I don't care what that reason is. I just want to learn from it and move on. So he's acknowledging that it happened for a reason, but he's also saying, like, doesn't matter that it happened. He's like admitting that reasons to make things happen. But he's also not letting those the reasons that things happen influence how he's going to deal with what he wants to learn from it.

But he said once he gets I think it's I think what he's saying is it's like a reason once he squeezes everything out of the reason he'll throw it, it's basically the reason is a grape and he's making it a raisin. The reason becomes a raisin. And then he doesn't eat raisins, OK?

And the stuff that's inside the raisin before he squeezes out, he won and now he's leaving that behind. I think that's how raisins get made. Right. I think you just leave them out in the sun for a while. So what happened? Like Durka? Yeah. Perfect room.

He's the reason. So there it is. He is the reason for he's the reason and the reason you lost him. All right. Next up, Cardinal's jets. We don't talk a lot about this game. The Cardinals proved what they are, which is not a bad team.

Remember we said this on Friday? Those are not frauds. Yeah. If the Cardinals don't win this game convincingly, we officially are just like the Cardinals can't be taken for real.

I just the only thing I had was the jets in the most jets like bad teams just find ways to have comical errors throughout the game.

And the Jets had it where they got they were like first and ten on the twenty. So they were in the red zone. They went for on fourth and one didn't get it like three plays. Later they get a pick, so they're back in the red zone on the ten and they settle for a field goal. They run run eight plays in the red zone and get three points. And it's like, oh, that's why the Jets of the Jets, they suck.

Yeah. If I'm Sam Donald, I would just I would milk this injury for a while. Yeah. I'd be like I got mono again. Right. Sorry I didn't learn my lesson. Went out club in Hoboken. Yeah.

Made out with a couple of sixes. You got the coco. Yeah. If I were, if I were Sam down there's no reason to come back right now. Absolutely. Like Joe Flacco. Joe Flacco actually look pretty good today. Yeah. I'll give Joe Flacco credit. Yeah. He looked better than Denver. Joe Flacco. He plays better at sea level.

He's like whatever. Yeah, it's just not good.

All I want is for Joe to just hang around. By the way, he's another quarterback. That defense is absolutely love to hit. Yes. I think he's he's kind of big and a little bit soft and he wears those shoulder pads that have like the big boxy plate on his chest. And, you know, and he's there are certain quarterbacks, Joe Flacco, Eli Manning, Matt Ryan actually is one of them to wear every now and then they'll try to run and they'll totally forget that they're the slowest people on Earth.

So they they try to get it going.

And then you'll see a linebacker like doing a light jog running six times faster than them and just punish them.

Yeah. Joe Flacco would also he used to run out of his knee brace sometimes like he was just make that thing explode. He has to slide.

But yeah, the Jets stink. Adam Gase, I don't know. I think I think the worst punishment that the Jets could give Adam Gates is to make him continue, continue to coach the Jets throughout the rest of the season.

I've been saying it. I don't know why Adam Gates is even showing up. I mean, show up, but don't even do a game plan. Yeah, it's so stupid. I mean, just you can just recycle game plans at this point. Nobody is going to tell the difference.

I never said why an NFL coach like Adam Gates, who has head to head coaching job. So you have. I have to imagine what he's got at least like five, six million dollars, probably in the bank, probably a little bit more, maybe a little more, depending on how he does his money, whatever. If I were Adam case, I'd be like, fuck this, I'm out.

I'm going to go coach high school football and have a nice life. Yeah, like dominate high school football. I have given him a little bit of dominate, not dominate high school.

It worked in college. You get worked in D3. I'm saying high school football, maybe, maybe go out to like Montana and do it where they don't even have enough kids in the high school play seven on seven. Yeah. That and dominate that and just live your life.

Keep him away from Arche Manning. Maybe that's his grand scheme is like I'm going to go down to New Orleans and ruin arch Mannings. Yeah. That is like the final boss of Adam I guess. Like if I can if I can destroy this absolute stud that's like, you know, this kid that everyone thinks is going to be the one one in three years time, like, then I will have accomplished my full form of Adam Geithner's is.

He's bad. He's really bad. OK, next game, Eagles, Steelers, great game. We got a Mike Tomlin quote, alert. He said after the game, the strength of the PAC is the PAC. We should actually get tatoos with that strength of the PAC is the PAC. It's like a fist. Yeah.

If you're wondering where the strength comes from. Well, dude, it's the PAC, so figure it out. But this game. So we'll talk about the Eagles, the Steelers first Chase Claypoole was incredible. And it just reminds you that Mike Tomlin and Kevin Colbert, the GM, they just find wide receivers no matter what.

It makes you realize just how bad Limus weed must have been. Yes. And how bad Martavis Bryant must have been.

Well he had issues. He was good. Yeah he was really, he had issues but I so I went and I looked through it.

They have. So they obviously have a few misses but they've never drafted a guy in the first round and almost every time they draft a guy he's like the sixth, seventh or even later wide receiver off the board. So Chase Claypoole this year, Deonte Johnson, who's pretty good. It was good last year. He had like sixty catches in and over six hundred yards. James Washington in the second round in twenty eighteen Juju in the second round in twenty seventeen.

Emmanuel Sanders in the third in 2010, Antonio Brown in 2010, the sixth round and Mike Wallace in the third round in 2009. All they do is draft great receivers.

Their average. I combined them all, their average are picking the tenth tenth receiver off the board and they find these guys. So think about it like every time they pick a receiver. All these guys have gone off the board in front of them and they're like, no, we found the guy we want. Like Chase Claypole was the eleventh receiver picked this year and he's off.

It's still weird to me thinking of Pittsburgh as being a passing team. I still think, like, they're just going to put Jerome Bettis back there and grind out like three point three yards per carry and beat you down with their defense.

They've still got a really good defense, but they've secondary is not so great. There is not not great right now, but issue pass rushers. Good.

Yeah, but Dupre's out there slinging Honda's TJ Watt. Yeah. So they also this is Big Ben coming off of not really a bye. This is actually Big Ben battling back from last week, not getting to play football because another team had coronavirus.

Well, let's wait. You're putting it lightly. Is Big Ben's personal holocaust? Yeah. Not being able to play football and not being told that he's not going to be able to play football until the last second.

Right. Because that was really like. Yeah, you want to say like two hundred thousand plus Americans dead, whatever, Big Ben had a bye week, he didn't even know he's going to have a bye week. And that's a tragedy. This week, Alex Smith got in, meaning that Big Ben's comeback player of the year for which he made a documentary. For your consideration, consider Big Ben for this award. Yeah, he got upstaged by Alex Smith.

So Ben was like, if I'm not going to it looks like a comeback player of the year is off the table. Maybe maybe I'll just try to win the MVP again.

And Dak or Big Ben. I'm probably watching that game. He's like such a pussy. Like, that's not even an injury. He's like, I've had that before.

Yeah. I talked to my doctor. He said there were five other quarterbacks that have that same injury. All right.

So the Eagles I actually do this for Eagles fans. You lose the Steelers, but you have a win today like overall because the Giants are still very bad. The Washington football team is very bad. And then Dak Prescott goes down and guess what?

Carson Wentz looks like he's kind of figured it out like he's kind of fixed whatever was happening in the first few weeks where he was God awful because he's still got no one to throw to besides Travis Fulgham, who shadowed him. He's like a star now. But when they get a few guys back, I think the Eagles I think we're going to be talking about the Eagles in like five weeks.

I'd be like, damn, look at this team. They look so much better.

There's also something about Wentz. When he runs, his body gets longer.

So like when he's diving forward, he gets like extremely Calamar, his body gets wider. Yeah, yeah. You're right. He does get a little bit. He does this thing. Yeah. He puts his arms out to the side. He looks like one of those characters from Mario Brothers, little gumbos. Right. Carson Wentz. He grows out so he turns into like the inflatable man guy. Well he's always going and then dives directly for it.

Say what you want about Carson Wentz, but he's I guess he's the exact right amount of dumb where he hasn't realized, like, oh, this is how I always get injured. So I'm going to keep doing this. And it is what makes him good. But yeah, he's looking like he's like eighty percent of what Carson Wentz used to be.

But you if you were a Eagles fan, you were freaking out in the first couple of weeks, like, what the fuck is going on? He had to pick. But I think what was a Hail Mary one wasn't really his fault. So he's I I really do think if you're an Eagles fan sitting here on Sunday night after week five, you're you're winning this division very confident, saying Hail Mary was another one of those plays.

I feel smart play because I was like, they should have batted that down because that's like a 60 yards. Twenty fourth down state should not have intercepted. He should have hit the ball into the ground. But it's stats. Yeah, but I felt smart when I was right. He should not have picked that off.

So the Steelers big test next week against the Browns, which should be fun.

But the overall like was this is one of the best games we had today. There are some games that were really duds. I mean, the Cardinals, Jets, the Ravens game, like there's this one was actually back and forth fun to watch.

And the Eagles, they were dead in the third quarter and they came back and scored fifteen points in a row. And I think if, like, everything's kind of fucked up for the Eagles right now, they have so many injuries is the only team that has injuries. They're the only team that forgot to turn injuries off before the season started.

So with everything that's happened to start the season, I really do think you're sitting there saying we're in a good spot.

Yeah, I have a suggested rule change that came out of this game. So I think I think it was Carson Wentz that threw pass. The ball was like knocked to the ground. It bounced twice and then got picked up by the Steelers defense and returned like it was an interception or a fumble. If you do that to an opposing quarterback and the ball is very clearly intercepted pass, the other quarterback should be allowed to kick that guy in the nuts for running down the field, making everybody think that it was an interception or a fumble or something like that when it very clearly was, I love those guys, get too excited.

I feel cheated their moment. I feel cheated. Right. And they look back and they're like, why is no one chasing me? Like, well, because the whistle blew and the ball hit the ground five times.

You know what you can tell that's that's a holdover from a well coached team in training camp right there. Like anytime there's a ball, you run to the end zone, show judge, run all the way through or else you're going to be running late.

Yes. Yes.

You feel it. It's Joe Judge leaking through.

There's also the teams that have their entire kickoff team sprint through the end zone. Five seconds after the ref calls for a touch, they swarmed the ball.

They just good coach team. All right. Before we get to our next game, quick word from our friends at Butcher Box when it comes to meat quality matters. But there's more to it than texture and taste. Put your box has the best meat out there. It's got 100 percent grass fed finish. Be free range organic chicken, heritage, bread, pork or wild caught salmon at the grocery store.

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OK Rams Washington football team the big story of the day. Alex Smith. There was a lot of hand-wringing.

People were very nervous for him. I was happy for him because. There is a lot of people were like projects like Alex with you have so much money, why are you doing this? He clearly wants to he wanted to prove to himself he could give back. It's a great story. Now, I guess my only question UPD is like, at what point can we criticize his play?

Not yet. OK, not yet. Perfect. I wasn't going to I think he had thirty six yards passing. They were the thirty six most glorious yards.

I wasn't going to say that they ran twenty six plays with them and they gave twenty five yards. No we're not going to the fact no completion was over six yards. I wouldn't say that they kept the most important side of the day. Yeah, he's healthy heart. The heart. His heart was off the charts. It was incredible. I'm very happy.

It is possible to feel good for Alex Smith while also feeling extremely uncomfortable watching him get back in for that first time, like watching a Russian bridge walking video. Right. Like you watching you like damn those guys. That is fucking incredible. Meanwhile, your hands are sweaty.

No, I like the hurt. I like the Russians that climb up to the top of the building. That's what I'm saying. It going off.

Yeah. Those guys. Yeah, that's the video. I'm like, it felt like Alex Smith's first couple of plays back and should have been sponsored by Red Bull because they were just like it was an extreme sport watching it. You don't know what's going to happen. When Aaron Donald like jumped on him, he got sacked six times.

I held my breath. So that's like, yeah, no, that's actually the best part of the day for Alex Smith. Yeah. Is that he got six times.

I'm I'm cool with feeling nervous about it. I was more talking to the people were like, why is he doing this. Like this is so stupid, this fucking idiot football guy, like he's doing this for glory. It's like, no, he loves playing like he wanted to get back.

It is one to prove it to him.

It is very Washington football team that the feel good story of their day was that their quarterback didn't get another massive fracture in his leg after having seventeen surgeries.

He also the joint has cancer is so weird now he had diarrhea. Big cat. Who. Dwayne Haskins.

That's why I wasn't there today. Oh no other reason. It's yeah. It's a stomach virus. It's like Kyle Allen, OK?

He scored a touchdown. He was fine. But Alex Smith, again, great story. Very happy for him. He's not a starting quarterback anymore, so you're basically saying, like, you can't make the argument that Dwayne Haskins Haskins is worse than the other two guys. So what's up?

Well, he had diarrhea today, as I already said. And watching him out there with diarrhea, I would be more uncomfortable watching a man going through bubble gut than I was watching Alex Smith play on, like half of the leg.

It's just bizarre because you said to yourself why they're doing it for the NFC East. It's so it's everyone's socks. We're in evaluation.

You said that the Riveras evaluation mode this year, which means that we can lose every single game and it doesn't make a difference because we're not planning on winning anything. But it is in retrospect, it probably wasn't a good idea to draft a guy because your owner's son was friends with him.

Mm hmm.

So the Cowboys have done. But it's not it's not a proven track record, though. And I'll be honest, I wanted Dwayne Haskins. I was very excited when they drafted him, mostly because, like, he was a good quarterback in college and because he was a local guy in D.C. So my reasons for wanting him drafted were not I wouldn't call myself a like a draft pick. Mel Kiper would get mad at me for my reasons why I'm on the team.

But I think best case scenario now, it's like just try to try and try to get there. Maybe Josh Rosen, I think he had a second round with Josh Rosen played one year.

Yeah. But I would say that since now in his second. But I don't think he's played 16 games yet. No, but I'm saying like it's too it's another year into his contract.

I'm talking about by year by by games. Right. But I'm saying the contract matters. Like if you're going to trade for a guy who you're hoping becomes a guy.

Yeah. Like a guy who becomes a dude. Right. You like. And Josh Rosen would probably be you know, you got me a second year going to second year, maybe didn't pick up bad habits clearly to enhance has been on the football team for too long.

But if you were to. Yeah, well, that's really how the market value it's like how long were you on the football team and your value decrease at that point? Too long. But I think Dwayne Haskins has played like he got was his five games into year two. So if he went to another team and played a little bit this year, it might be worth a second round pick. If if if the football team gets a second round pick for Dwayne Haskins, I'll be happy with him.

I wish him the best. And that's really the other thing. That's the story of being a football team fan is like my biggest highlights have been rooting for guys that used to be on the football team. Yeah. To do well when they get on new football.

The other thing that changes it, and I might be way wrong, but Josh Rosen, like everyone's like, oh, well, they're going to draft Cuyler. So like maybe the Cardinals are trading him not because he's bad, but because they have someone else, whereas the Redskins have officially just been like, he sucks. Yeah, we don't like him. So, yeah. So if they've they've they've sunk their own their own equity here. Yeah.

Well that's what we do. Yeah. We've done that repeatedly. So what you're saying is his trade value would increase if we draft another quarterback. That would be his replacement if you had he didn't play another game. Right. And now you've already ruined it because you benched him for Alex Smith.

Who will know about we bench him for Kyle Allen.

Yeah.

Who actually played well when he was he played the whole thing like you needed to draft a guy while he was still the starter.

So it's going to shock you to realize this, but the football team has mismanaged yet another quarterback at this point.

I want to go back to week one. When you were like this team might be good.

Listen, we're a game and a half out of first. True. It's true in the hunt. And right now in this season, you never know.

I don't want to defeatist. You know, I want the the this could be something special.

We'll be crazy. Like if we win if we win six games this year, we're going to be in the hunt. We're going to be in that craft. The entire NFC East is going to be in the hunt really fucking with everybody's playoff picture, because you're going to see like the the one in twelve Giants still being mathematically right at the end of the year mathematically alive. That would be that's huge for me as a football team fan.

Yeah, of course. Talk about the you can be if you can be in the graphic by, you know, after Thanksgiving in December.

Huge. Yeah, that is huge.

I do want to say, like, I've I've moved on mentally, as Warren Sharp advised me, to have moved on from Dwayne Haskins. I'm focusing now either on Trey Lance.

I know you like Trey Lancelot, right? I just like the name.

It's a cool I just said Trey Lancelot put that in the Burmans for three years from now. Here are I want the three hundred pound Titan from Auburn.

Yes, he's second that while he was running back. Kyle Pitts's, who you really want from Florida. He's an awesome tight end.

The Rams. I feel like they've played on the East Coast every single week.

So sucks for them. I'm looking at their schedule right now. They do have to play the dolphins so in like three weeks. So I guess I'll just be back.

We need to talk about Jared Goff. Spike. Yeah, it was raining. Jared, we love you. Despite what Hank might say, he to it was raining. You got his endzone. You know, I'll say this.

Say something nice about you have Jared Goff and Tom Brady, my fantasy team, and Jared as my starter, OK. Oh yeah. Well, Tom, no.

Doesn't know loyalty and loses a little senile.

Yeah. I actually think that Tom Brady is more similar than we think. He thought that it was about to be the star. The fourth quarter, that's why I put the is up, he forgot that he probably got, like, waterboarded by Alex Guerrero after that game, like you need to drink more water, yet your brain doesn't work and we're going to flood you.

We're going to drown you internally.

Yeah, but Jared, say something nice about Jared Goff. Spike, despite that he had where he basically, like, threw the ball straight up into the air was better than Kirk Cousins fumbles that. Yes. Yes. It looked slightly better than those.

Yes, it's actually I just pulled up the game. It's got TD run. It's much better than a celebratory spike.

Damn, it was raining. It was wet. It's not. Hey, guess what he got in the end zone. You can do whatever you want once you get in the end zone. All right. Next up, Bengals, Ravens. This game sucked. It was just the Ravens were in cruise control. I felt bad for Joe Borro. He was getting the shit kicked out of them. Yeah. AJ Green quit on the team that highlight. So I didn't see that one.

Oh, you didn't know he Joe broke through an interception. AJ Green probably couldn't have caught it, but he didn't even try. And then Marlin Humphries, I think, was one who got it, was running it back in as you're going to standing next to him. And he started running almost like he looked like he was looking to block someone to free like he had no interest whatsoever in tackling him when he was standing right next to him like a total.

I'm giving up on this season. I'm giving up on this team. I'm out. See you later.

I'm going to blame the football. Chubarov said last week he didn't want to accept the game ball because that football had too many good plays left in it. I think he just got a bad ball today.

Watch this. Watch us. All right. Tell me what you think. OK, all right. All right. Yeah Evergreen's see it. Do you see how he runs. Just run. Yeah I saw it was so so bad. So I don't know what the hell that's about. Is probably gonna hurt ankle cat.

He listen. He just starts running right next to him and doesn't even want like he he turns like I don't want to have anything to do. He was guarding against the lateral. He said he thought that they were try looking the other way as well. Yeah, that's. Let's play the game.

Was the ref for avoiding Lamar Jackson. He was probably trying to hit Lamar Jackson and then fell down to the side because that's what defenders do when they try to tackle it in the open field. Right. Simultaneously terrible through patella tendons just crumple to the ground.

That was that was the highlight of the game. Was the ref falling down when Lamar Jackson ran by him? Yes.

Hank, by the way, if you want to get your swag back because, you know, Cam Newton's been out, the Pacers haven't played, they lost, you know, to the Chiefs. You got to start the like, Patriots fan thing of like. Well, AJ Green, we're going to trade for AJ Green if you're going to look good in the Patriots. Yeah, because I think he does want to be traded rock and refuel, baby.

Yeah, that's right. Yeah. This game suck though. The Ravens are just better again. Follow the rule. The Ravens will ship pump inferior opponents. This was never in doubt game where Jibaro had no chance because the Ravens defense, like they're bullies, the Ravens are bullies.

I think the defense also like to hit Joe Burrow. Yeah, well, because you might not like to.

They might to test. Yeah, they like to test him and they might just it might be a crime of opportunity because that offensive line, it's just absolutely atrocious.

How much does it suck? Like, I think Patriquin picked off Joe Burrow. Yeah. How much is something like. Oh, I'm I went from national champion to a team that's going to be in the playoffs and like a one or two seed and you're on the Bengals.

How did the Ravens talk after the Ravens always draft a player where it's like, oh yeah, holy shit, how is that guy still Dobens?

That's a great pick from them.

Yeah, Jake, Jake Dobbins is awesome. But yeah, this game, who cares who do the Ravens have? We need to start the Ravens play the Eagles next.

That's that doesn't fall under my I think they're going to be a little too frisky to be like completely inferior in that respect.

I think they're going to beat the Eagles next week. They don't play some bad teams until later in the season. All right. Next up, Jaguars, Texans. We were wrong, by the way, we have to put a little tickler about a particular file on this wee wee bash, Romeo Crennel as an interim head coach, saying he doesn't have the pizzazz, he doesn't have the balls to piss and vinegar. I forgot two things. One is he's three and one now has an interim head coach.

So he's close. He's teetering on being like, we got to start putting on Romeo Crennel as an interim head coach, too. I forgot when he was the Chiefs interim head coach, he beat the Packers and broke. They're like eighteen game win streak or nineteen game winning streak. Romeo Crennel might be a good interim head coach. He might be, but I think Bill O'Brien would have won this game.

I think in this case it was more just like we don't have Bill O'Brien anymore, like it could have been literally anyone.

Well, and more than that, I think it was the Jaguars because the Jaguars, they were playing like I'm excited for more action to come back. The Jaguars are action. The miss kicks. They they missed two kicks. And then because they missed two kicks, they had to they went for it on fourth in like, I don't know, fourth and goal from the eight. And it was that hilarious fumble that was like, what was this play?

What is going on there? Just it's kind of getting satin.

I think there's a pretty simple metric that you can look at when you're trying to figure out if a team is just like woefully bad or just a franchise if it's being run really, really badly. And that's how many consecutive years do they have an awful kicking situation? Yeah, because it seems like good teams, good franchises. At the minimum, they'll keep a kicker for three years. Right. But teams like the Jaguars are the football team going through kickers.

They're they're kickers. They could have a jersey like the Browns have four quarterbacks for all the kickers that they cycle through. And with the Jaguars, I think this is like their fifth or sixth string kicker this year. It's pretty bad.

Hauschka, I do think that that just bum Phillips hat and a headset could have probably won this game like they would have played harder, I agree, for a dead head coach than for Bill O'Brien.

I agree. I agree. So, yeah, the this was a stinker of a game again, we had of a few weird stinko games, and this was one of them.

I don't really have anything else on it besides the fact that I don't know the Texans going to win a couple of games.

Now, maybe Texans are in the running for the best, worst team. Yes, my power rankings of the best, worst teams tied at number one Vikings in Texas.

OK, I think the Chargers should be in there. I don't think that they're one of the worst teams, though. Put their one in three. Yeah, that's better.

Better than the winless Vikings or Texas. They beat the Texans. So your rankings are kind of screwed up.

But the Vikings lost today. The Texans won today. So they're still tied at number one.

Yeah, the Texans I don't know how big this is. Just weird, stupid team. And then Deshaun Watson is incredible half the time. And then half the time he'll throw a wide open receiver right at their shins a million miles an hour.

How attractive of a head to head coaching job do you think the Texans are compared to the Falcons? I don't know. I think they're more attractive, but you also have to. I'd say more attractive, Arthur Blank doesn't fire people, though, like it took them forever to fire Dan Quinn, but he creeps you out all the time. Yeah, but I would I would always take everyone says, like, you need a franchise quarterback, you need an owner that's just way too stupid and loyal.

That always can play for you.

Would just I would get the goosebumps hanging out next. Arthur Blank, imagine how could I schmooze more in the in the meeting with the owners?

Because if you get the if you get the owner in your back pocket as an NFL head coach, you can stay on forever. Yeah, I don't know. It really is the key. Be best friends with the owner. He'll never fire you.

I just would not want to be best friends with Arthur Blank. Now, that would be worse than being creepy, but you'd also probably get to see, like, cool shit, like you'd write a cool book afterwards, he'd probably be like a ghost town every day. You know what he probably does, like when he's pulling out all the stops. He's yeah, he does a ghost tour of Mercedes Benz Superdome. He's like, check this out. I know it's Sunday, but I got the key to chick fillet.

Right.

And he goes in and makes you some chick fillet, but they're actually not Chick fil A. It's like they're ghosts. They're actually poisoned.

And now you're under my spell, right. And you're never going to you ever going to go for it on fourth down from the 10 yard line ever again.

It's actually their baby fetuses and Kuhnen is right out the door. Yeah. Yeah, I can see that. Yeah, yeah. All right.

Telethon's 49ers, FETs. Fitzpatrick, like, should the Dolphins trade to.

I was wondering, I mean I'm joking but he threw for three hundred fifty yards and three touchdowns.

If the dolphins go any way are you going to start to an Fitzpatricks of his quarterback. I don't think that you can fuck. He was so good.

And I don't know what's going on with the forty Niners like that. Their hangover is officially the worst hangover ever.

Well, Jimmy Garoppolo stunk out loud today and thank God he's coming back from injury. So you can be like, well we brought him back too fast because if that was not. Yeah, if you can do that he's not healthy. We rushed him back. You can save a little face because man was he bad.

I really don't see the difference between Jimmy Garoppolo, Nick Mullins and CJ Beth, but there I think they both was bad too. Yeah they were. So yeah.

Yeah you could start either one of them in any game. And I don't think that the lines like how many points do you think Jimmy Garoppolo is worth like a starting healthy Jimmy Garoppolo. A point, yeah, probably a point, yeah, they're essentially the same quarterback, I mean, if they had both drives a nicer, nicer car.

Yeah, that's really what's killing them is their defense is just ravaged by injuries. And I don't know. I mean, that's that's an NFC West is a miserable, miserable division to play in because every team is good or above the competent level. So that was an ass kicking though. Forty three. Seventeen. It was never even close. Brian Flores might be a good head coach.

I think he's a very good kid. I think he might be a good coach. He doesn't have I mean, they're building talent there, but they're they are competitive in every game. Like they might lose games by a lot of they make it point, but it's not you don't want to watch a blowout, but like, they're trying in there and they're fighting and they're not giving up. Like when they get when they lose badly, they still have that.

And they've got some they've got a shitload of draft picks, don't they? Yeah, they used a bunch this year, but yes, I think they still got the Texans draft picks. Yeah, they did last year. They the Fitzpatrick trade and also the who's the bond guy.

Laramie Townsell there year got to a point. That guy gets covered. Yeah. So the they, they do, I think they do have it and they have to. They have to which I don't, I think they should just double down trade to get even more pics I'm looking at there. Yeah. I mean they've been in every single game. They were in that game against the Patriots week one they lost by three to the bills. They are in that Seahawks game to the fourth quarter.

Yeah, they don't.

Well, when they were in every game, they were tanking last year, there were still a team that was like, OK, we're going to be, but we're going to make it look like we're not taking. There are some games last year where they got the Chicago. But yeah, but for the most part, they were like, we're the team. That's perfect.

A tanking match. If the Dolphins make the playoffs, that's just the Dolphins. With Fitzpatrick make the playoffs, we could only be so lucky.

Seven teams in. They have the jets twice, they have the Bengals. That's the play the Patriots and the Chiefs, it's tough and let's play the Rams fuck, we need like two more back the Broncos. They have the Jets twice, the Broncos and the Bengals. So that's four wins.

So now they're at six. Can they get. I'll read you the rest of it. Can they get or say eight and eight maybe? Yeah, they need my know probably on the AFC. All right. But let's say they need three more wins out of these opponents. Rams at Cardinals. Chargers, they could beat the Cardinals.

Cardinals are can the Rams at Cardinals, Chargers, Chiefs, Patriots at Raiders Bills. They could get two more wins out of that. Yeah. Finish eating eight.

Yeah. I think that a good it's actually I'm getting excited for Fitzpatrick to maybe make the point.

It's a fun thought experiment to be like if you're the Dolphins and you clearly love amassing draft picks like you got ready, you're always rebuilding. As long as Bill Belichick is coaching in that division, you can get away with being in rebuild mode for probably like four seasons without anybody really starting to figure out, like, hey, you're not you're not really making any moves yet. So if you keep Fitzpatrick as your starting quarterback and then you just get like a shitload of first round draft picks, I think you could probably start, Fitzy, for another like year.

You're five years, five years or three years, and then maybe draft another quarterback behind him. Beats that guy out because there's not a there's no rookie that's going to show up and be able to beat Ryan Fitzpatrick in training camp, because I'm convinced that Fitzpatrick knows how to, like, act like he's being a good mentor to the young guys, but secretly trained them wrong as a joke to fuck them up.

And you have to trust them because you went to Harvard. Exactly.

So there you go, find Fitzpatrick in the playoffs for the Dolphins.

Let's make what's actually find that bet on the Parcells sports book.

And let's go in on the Dolphins to make the playoffs like it could happen. I could see I could see now and say they've been in every game. Yeah, nine and seven might not get them in the AFC so tough that Raiders game is going to pretty much be the decider. Because you look if you look at the AFC right now, the entire AFC North has four four wins except for the Bengals. There's three teams there for one or better.

And then you you know, the Titans, the Colts, the Chiefs, the Raiders, the Bills, the Patriots.

I mean, there's FOK. Come on, Dolphins. We might become a Dolphins podcast. They're pretty fucking fun to.

They're very funny. Patrick is fun to watch. Watch him go out and throw six picks next week. That's fun. Yeah, but it's going to suck for our dolphins future that we haven't put in yet. Jon Gruden, what about the bills.

What a lot of dogs in the AFC East.

Well, yeah, we like well the bills are the bills are like our Greyhound. The dolphins are our mutt, like the bills are our Labrador.

The Dolphins are our little fucking mutt that we found behind a trash there. Rescue.

Yeah, the bills are beautiful. You know what? Happy, dutiful golden retriever with beautiful hair that we just brush all day as little yapping dog comes and shows up. I'm like, you got spunk. We'll let you hang out.

Yeah. You know what happened? We were just fostering the dolphins for a while and they grew on us. We're trying to find a good home for them, try to pass them off, trying to make Jake really fall in love with his his native dolphins. And we just realized we love them too much to let them go.

And then also I like the Steelers, but whatever.

OK, before we get to the next game, I was wondering, these days are long. Is there a way to chill out? Like, just chill out. Do you ever just chill out?

I got a great way to chill out. You do? Yeah. Fuck yeah. Give it to me. It's three cheat.

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All right. So we have two games left. Browns Colts of course. Cody Park dunks one in.

Did you see Cody Pakhi after he after he kicked the ball. He was watching it like a hawk. It hit the first stop. Right. And everybody else start to celebrate because they knew that it was bouncing off and going in. Cody's eyes were locked on that ball, making sure it did not hit the crossbar. And it was it made it by like, I don't know, seven, eight yards.

So. Well, where was that? We needed to put. Yeah, the Browns first four and one start since 1994 when Bill Belichick and Nick Saban were on the coaching staff. It's crazy. It's crazy. The Browns might be good.

They look good. We're going to find out next weekend. Steelers, they look really good.

Well, here's a fun stat. I saw this from Nick Carnes on Twitter. He said, Baker Mayfield has officially surpassed Ben Roethlisberger as the winningest active quarterback at First Energy Love in Cleveland.

There we go. Cleveland back.

Hell, yes, finally. So that game is going to be awesome.

What I don't like is the sad brown stats that are starting to become normal again. So the sad brown stats that we're all used to are like, oh, this is the first time that, you know, the Browns have won in October at home since 1974 or whatever.

You know, they always have these ones are like, all right, way, way back on one since 1994. Yeah. Today the big sad brown stats were like, oh, that's the first pick six that they've given up. So, ah, that's the first pick six that they've returned since all the way back in week fifteen of last year. They're starting to become normal again. Right. And I missed the brown stat so I've got to hold on if you have any good sad brown stats.

Please send them our way because I need to I need to hold on to that for a little bit. Yes, I agree. So the Browns might be good like they have an M.O. We talked about it last week. They run the ball. They had a balanced attack. Baker made a couple mistakes, but he also, I think, threw for over 250. So guess what? In Myles Garrett is so good, their defense, the Browns defense is not great.

But Myles Garrett is one of the best players in the NFL.

Yeah, so, like, I would rather have a defense. It's not good with one exceptional player than a defense. It's just like and all across the board, there's at least Myles Garrett.

You can you can have a game where it's like, oh, he's just going to wreck shit. Yeah.

So last week, the defensive scheme that they were running had basically your standard for down linemen and for whatever reason, they were double teaming every single pass rusher except for Miles. Yeah, the Cowboys, the Cowboys game. They're double teaming everybody except for Myles Garrett today. They said, let's get fucking crazy with it. And they brought out this weird formation a couple of times where they put all their down linemen way off to the side, like starting on the outside shoulder of the of the guard.

And then just had Myles Garrett go up against three guys, be like, we're going to force you to at least double team Myles Garrett, maybe even triple team, so we can get like one of these other guys.

You get something? Yeah, we just live here. Vernon Myles Garrett needs to feel respected enough to be on the receiving end of a double team every now and again. But you're smart. He is. He's really good. Stefanski, I think Smart is a smart smart. He's a smarter person.

No, he's one Freddie kitchen. Yeah, he's smart. He's wastewater that free kitchen. So yeah, the Browns are good, the Browns are good.

And the Colts I don't know. I mean they ended up Dariusz Leonard who's you know, you can't judge the Colts defense out there.

Is Leonard out there I. I think the Colts are decent, but Phil Rivers still his Phil Rivers, he's old, he's Phil Rivers.

He was screaming, if you had to buy if you had to buy one team and obviously were playing just the results from this this game. But if you had to buy one team higher ceiling this year, I think it's the Browns.

Yeah. The only problem with the Browns is their division. You know, the division is tough in this game against the Steelers. They're in third place right now. Huge, huge, huge, huge.

We do like the Browns to the Browns are another one of our teams. Yeah. So now we've got 12 of the AFC playoff, half of the AFC. And I feel confident. Can we just please get Philip Rivers miked up for every game? You can put it on a live stream because you know he's not going to cost. Yeah, he's not going to say anything inappropriate. He might he's probably like talking trash Odell Beckham. Like, you got a bunch of mess.

I heard you like to get messed on your chest hair. You, like heard you like the ladies that defecate all over you. You're sorry. You're sorry.

There's no way he knows that story. Oh, he does know he does. Because Philip Rivers. No great trash talk. Not on.

No, he's not on line enough. There's no way.

I think that's it. I know. But I don't see it in front of Phil Rivers out of respect for father of 12 14.

No, I'm sure he just silently sits there and kind of like shakes his head, but, like, doesn't, you know.

Well, no, but I bet you Phil Rivers can't even imagine someone sitting on someone's chest that he thinks it's like all of a joke, like a tick tock, tick tock.

These people on each other, he makes girl just take a stinky on your nipples. That's like a weird man. Oh, that was Jerry Jones. Jon Gruden.

That's weird. That's weird, man. Next to me, the only thing I always pictured, Phil Rivers when he's screaming, I just assumed they said, yell, sorry, you're all the stars team we ever play X?

It's always end up either Jerry Jones or Mike Mike related to Delhi or Delhi or Delhi. All right.

He took a shit on you. It's weird.

Cowboys, giants to finish it off. Dak, we're not even Cowboys fans and we feel bad for Dak as a football team fan.

We so we went I found him to say, like, I'm rooting for Dak. Yeah.

We found the ultimate, though, because we've been making this joke for many years about people. Whenever there's a horrific injury, they have to chime in and say, listen, I root for the Eagles, but even I feel bad for dactylic. Thank you for qualifying. How hard it was for you to have basic human emotion, to feel bad for someone's ankle that was sideways on national television within about five seconds.

There were there were representatives from every single TFSA Packers fan coming in here getting on this front to say, I'm I'm very sorry, I saw recovery, but I found the ultimate the we reached a new level.

I said to myself, you know, there's a lot of people who have been taking a stand saying they're not watching sports anymore.

And there were I started retweeting people who don't even watch football anymore, but they heard about Dak instantly and they feel bad. Yeah. And they want to send their prayers.

Listen, I don't watch the sports bowl, but even as somebody that doesn't pay attention to athletics and it's feel bad for a man who's hurt ever since Colin Kaepernick got blackballed or ever since I started kneeling, you get both sides.

Yeah. I don't watch this sport, but I happen to have CBS on it like five o'clock this afternoon.

I saw DACs ankle go sideways. But, you know, I just want to say my thoughts and prayers.

Skip Bayless is like, listen, I'm not a fan of mental health, but I still feel bad for Dak Prescott is hurting himself or like, skip it. First of all, Skip Bayless was he was all over the map today. He didn't know how to handle his emotions.

Well, he had become Bron. Yeah, this. Yeah. He was thinking ahead to later on that night.

I think, Skip, what he really wanted to tweet was like you thought Dak was depressed before.

Yeah. You listen, I'm going to get in trouble for this, but Dallas Cowboys quarterbacks can't break their ankles.

That's what Skip wants. Yes. Yes, it's so it sucked. But Eddie Dalton came in and Andy Dalton.

I'm happy ending Alton's back in our life.

Andy Dalton should be decent on this Cowboys team like Andy Dalton. The bugaboo with Andy Dalton is always he's one of those guys and we've talked about him is like the Kirk Cousins. You can list a bunch of guys who you basically make the argument if everything's right, they can be good, everything on the offensive side of the ball, maybe their offensive line. But he has every single weapon. He's got the best weapons he's ever had. He's got a great running game.

Everything should be OK for Andy Dalton to actually thrive. And he made a great pass and a great catch by Michael Gallop, who's like the unheralded star their cowboys are to win any games.

He's the perfect Mike McCarthy quarterback because he will take all the shit that you throw at him, like Mike McCarthy can scream at him and treat him like just a pile of mud. And Andy Dalton will never publicly go up against his head coach. He'll never like a spot.

Could you imagine winning a Super Bowl with the Dallas Cowboys? I still think he looks weird.

I was going to say he looks weird in the helmet. The visor looks pretty slick on it. Yeah, that's. Andy Dalton 2.0, I do feel bad for Jack, though, that sucks. Yeah, it sucks just because he's a fun player to watch and then yeah, I mean the Cowboys, I don't know where they get their defense. They made the Giants look competent offensively, which is very hard to do. The Giants, I turn to you guys, I would say by two minutes in the second quarter, the Giants had seventeen points.

That was the most points they scored all year in a game, two minutes in the second quarter. That's what the Cowboys do for you and Joe Judge. I'm sure he's got to look in the mirror and get back to the blue collar ways. But the New York Jets, the New York Giants, first time ever, their combined own tend to start the season.

John's got to bring the lunchpail. That's what Joe George has to do. He has to issue team lunch pails and install one of those clock game clock out things at the facility. Bring him back to the blue collar. I will compliment Daniel Jones.

He is an incredible endzone throw away quarterback when he's with airmail fifteen, twenty yards of the goal line and he doesn't like his first read. He's putting it between the uprights. Well, he's throwing it nine, ten yards up. Well, that's because he also his clock, his internal clock is the worst of all time. He he just stands there. That's why he always fumbles. So he'll stand there and everyone will be covered for a good eight minutes.

And then it'll be like, OK, now I'm going to launch it.

Yeah, nothing. There's nothing that hits quite like a Daniel Jones throw away. He is he's probably the best quarterback in the NFL at doing that. He's got a rock. I did see a new species out in the wild on Twitter related to the back injury. The person who says, I just saw the dak injury, but I'm not going to post it here.

Mm hmm. Yes. So we're not going to repost it. But I just want you to know it's terrible.

I just watched the back injury. Please don't tweet it out. Yes. I'm not going to repost that. Thank you for your service. Not smashing the tweet button on a guy's fibula poking through his leg.

That was all time with Tony Romo being like, maybe it's just a cramp. And then, like, we like we don't want to show this again as they showed it again in slow motion. You going to watch it?

I think we've had this discussion, but the first one I vividly remember, Willis McGahee, no one will forget his knee.

And they didn't have, like, replays like they do now. So that was a oh, my God, how the fuck did that happen?

I mean, this was like the year 2000. So, no, they didn't. But they didn't replay it, like from 17 different. Ain't no. We got we got like one one English. And back in my day we got one replay.

You say so. And we liked it. Ah, you say this. No, no, no, you're absolutely right. But with Dak Prescott thing. Yeah they showed it to us. I think that people should watch the replay too. They should watch it because if you're going to enjoy football like you need to know what they do go through. Like what, what can happen if somebody on any given play to understand, like it puts into perspective his his contract discussions he was having like, oh, you're doing like a human thing.

No, I'm saying like you should watch it. No, I'm watching it because I like to watch gruesome things. OK, I'm saying you should watch watch like skateboarders like break their legs. That's that's I watch those videos.

It's way funnier when somebody gets their leg broken for free than it is like on Sunday. At that point I take it very seriously. Yeah. No, I just thought Travis do a real grind and like a stop sign splits open the scrotum. That's fucking fun.

No, listen, neck injuries. No thank you. But any type of broken bone puch video impalement non-life threatening. I'll watch it. Oh, replay it. Shout out.

Shout out to Mike Nolan. He moved to the sidelines. Yeah. So Mike moved down to the sidewalk.

Did well. They won the game. He's got to move back up. They won, maybe moved to the other sideline. That would work. My big question and stands over the opposing offensive coordinators.

I was gonna say coaches the opposing defense. That would probably yeah. That would help out a lot. But how bad must Earl Thomas be? How bad must his current situation be if the Cowboys haven't brought him in yet?

Yeah, must be pretty bad because they brought in Aldon Smith.

They brought in Greg Hardy. Well, he might be asking for too much money. That might be it. That may not have enough money.

That's that's actually not a I would imagine that he's probably getting paid this year by the Ravens.

Right. To assert it, although I don't know how that works either.

We're not fucking sure there's a there's a chance that Jerry Jones doesn't know that Earl Thomas is available yet.

Someone needs to let them know because if Earl Thomas showed up on Sunday just wearing a Cowboys uniform, Jerry Jones be like, yeah, we got a ballplayer.

Yeah, that's not good. We're in we're in it. All right. Let's get to Deon before we do that. Quick word from our sponsors.

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All right. We now welcome on our friend, colleague, Coach Prime. He's in the gym. So are we. What are you lifting? No, no, I'm just casually just chillin. Are you trying to make a comeback because your Falcons are God awful?

What? You know what? I know what I did. I know my mistake, I believe, and I bet you guys do this sometimes on my picks, I pick one way in on a football show. I picked another way and I wanted to I wanted to do the same thing. And when I call you this morning, I said, get off the balance. It ain't way you're not going. Don't do it. And you kind of talked me into staying because you didn't see anything like that, I.

So what what happened what changed between earlier this week and this morning? You just woke up with a feeling you're like, oh, it's Sunday. What am I doing? Betting on the Falcons. Right. What am I doing?

Picking the Falcons is not playing. What am I doing? It's no way they're going to win against Teddy Bridgewater. Just the consistency. Yes. And Dan Quinn has officially been fired.

Well, he didn't know there were like some reports saying it's likely to happen on Monday or they said, like, he's as good as fired, but I think they're going to be coming to the office.

He hasn't been fired yet, which is right here. But, you know, it was coming.

It's almost worse that it is this way where it's like, hey, Dan, we're not going to fire you yet. You can come into the office and make all your arrangements and have that long, sad commute in knowing that you're about to be fired.

Wow. So who's the interim is the real I?

Yeah, they haven't announced that yet because I guess Dan Quinn still has the job technically, technically as of this moment.

Yeah. They're saying now now people this this is my favorite part about the media today is that no one can wait till he's officially fired. So the report is all but finalized that he is going to be fired tomorrow and everyone's just running with it. Yeah.

So he's calling for noodles. Yeah. Yeah, he's gone. Let's talk about the biggest story, though.

Obviously, Dak Prescott, the injury, terrible, terrible injury. Feel awful for him. You're watching that game. What were you thinking when you see him go down and then the Cowboys being resilient and winning that game with Andy Dalton?

The first thing I was thinking about was, I know when you're on that cart, all those emotions are going through your mind and you're thinking to yourself, man. I probably should have took that long term deal because how is this going to really play out in all those stupid talks like that go through your mind? I've been there, done that. It goes through your mind like, what's next? Are you going to ever be to say, are you going to rehab?

If you're going to be as strong as you're going to be, are you going to be as good? All those thoughts are going through his mind. Yeah, you know Jerry Jones pretty well, I would imagine I had either thought that Jerry is, at least at this stage in his life, he seems to have kind of become, you know, very much a player's owner. It would not shock me if Jerry Jones still made a big contract offer this offseason, knowing that he was not.

That deserves a big contract golfer. First and foremost. He's earned it. He deserves it. But that's still OK. But you could have got more. You always think you could get more. When is enough enough? So that's the thing that Dak is contemplating.

He wanted to finish this year strong. Yeah. And it's it probably sounds sounds callous. I saw some people on Twitter being like, now's not the time to talk about tax contracting. It isn't. But you're absolutely right. The human the human element of it is that's going through DACs mind right now. And you can't you can't play the What-If game. The hindsight is 20/20. I will say this, though. The one part of today and as bad as DACs injury was, watching Alex Smith play has to give you like a little bit of hope of saying the injuries are not like they were 30 years ago.

This is not Dak Prescott is going to be back playing football at some point. This isn't a career ender. He will be able to play again. And there's there's almost like a kind of a beautiful you know, you don't want to see a guy get hurt, but a beautiful like message in there. Like you saw Alex Smith come back after a horrific injury when Dak has a horrific injury today.

Alex Smith is one of my favorites. And to see how it played out and he got back in there. I was I mean, I was like, yes, yes, that is wonderful. I love it. And to see how this thing is playing is going to play out with that. Then you start thinking all the crazy talk that can go to management. And the owners might like if the Cowboys finish eight, eight, six and ten, what do you do?

Do you go in the draft? Do you love to be a free agent? What do you do? See all those thoughts are going to. They're going to circulate. Yeah. Yeah. Do you think you've got to weigh every option?

Do you think that Andy Dalton is the guy they're going to ride with? I mean, it it was hard in retrospect for them to go out and get Andy Luke. You know, he has been a starting quarterback for, it seems like thirty years in the NFL. But based on the small amount that you saw out of him today, you think they're going to they're going to ride with that, or do you think they're going to bring somebody else in as well?

Well, they got to break into the back the just in case Andy goes down, but that was a great move, like when you look at how it played out. You're saying, good job, Stephen Jones, great job. Anticipate what could possibly happen, happened and still get your team to a guy that has started a numerous amount of games that can handle the attention of being a Dallas Cowboy quarterback and get the job done simultaneously.

Yeah, from a from a player's standpoint, if you have a teammate suffer an injury like that, how do you move on from it?

Does it take like do you have a short, like, quick discussion about and then you say, OK, let's put that aside, we'll deal with it later.

How do the players get refocused at that point without thinking too much about the fact of, you know, we just saw our starting quarterback go down with a severe ankle injury.

But it's tougher because this your leader, it's it's a guy that you have hope in, guy, and you follow a guy that is the face of your franchise. Those look tougher. When is that guy. But you've got to you've got to buckle back up and play the next play like it never happened. That's the thing about professional sports. Guys get hurt in practice that guys get hurt in preseason. Guys get hurt on these freak accidents and incidents all the time.

So the show must go on. That's the mentality. Yeah.

The the other big takeaway I had from this Sunday is the 49ers, your other team. Now, they have a ton of injuries, but it does feel like the Super Bowl hangover or the, you know, the curse of losing the Super Bowl kind of feels real here where it's a snake pit year. You every time you went to Super Bowl, you want it. But do you believe in a team getting there, falling short, and then the next year having a hard time getting back up to that level?

No, no, I don't. The thing about it, whenever you win, even if you didn't win the Super Bowl, but you won and made it to the Super Bowl, you lose players. You you you lose kind of that that hunger and thirst some guys, because some guys blow up in the off season and they start getting better deals and off the field endeavors and they got to really stay focused. The nucleus of your team has to stay focused.

They have a lot of injuries, man. And tell me what happened with Garoppolo. Did he get benched? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

He threw two of the worst Kirk Cousins division. Yeah.

That's why we got to be careful. We're putting CS on these guys. Just how do you bench a captain. Well you can say I would imagine Kyle Shanahan, it's not a benching of he's benched going forward. It's a he's coming back from an injury. This is just my my guess. He's coming back from an injury. We're down thirty points or whatever. Twenty five points. I'm not going to let him get injured more. Let's sit him down.

This game's a wash. Let's go to the next week. That's my guess.

Yeah, but you're down by thirty. You're down by thirty because he has something to do with it. Yeah, I'm just sitting here thinking as a teammate, how can we pay a guy twenty to thirty meal and you bench him and he's the captain and I and you want me to look up to him. Yeah. How how in the world is that fashionable?

Well, in hockey it happens a lot if there's a goaltender that's having like a bad game, you know, like sometimes you get you got the yips, you have a bad day. But in football, it's like with the quarterback position, it means a lot more. If you take that person out of the game, you're sending a message to that person saying, like, we don't think that you're the guy that can get it done. And then it becomes a big question, who's going to start the next game?

Whereas in hockey, I think it's more like, OK, we can accept the fact that players have bad days sometimes. But if you're Jimmy Garoppolo, like this is it's got to be stick in your head. Like, that's it's embarrassing what happened to him today. And I don't know if he's going to be able to bounce back if or if they're going to have like an open competition between him, Nick Mullins and CJ Better next week.

But it makes you think about, OK, because last year there was talking to all season that they did entertain the Brady situation. They entertain some other situations. Now you're thinking, OK, however this plays out, are you going to entertain other situations in college situations in the off season? Because it seems as though you're not 100 percent sold on your quarterback is no way you bench a twenty to thirty million dollar quarterback. Yeah, yeah. No, it's true.

It's a weird spot to be in now for the forty Niners. Like that locker room is going to be very interesting on Tuesday whenever they get back. Dion, I had one last question. We joke about this all the time. Chiefs losing to the Raiders. Is there such a thing as a blueprint game. Not really. Does the matchup game like some people just really match up good against other teams? Some coaches have history against other teams, just like Alabama Ole Miss.

Right. OK, you know, those coaches got history, man, and they just match up.

Well, Groot Groden. Has history there with Andy Reid, right? It's true, it's a good point, and they do have the offensive line in the running game that can, you hope, take the air out of the game against Patrick Mahomes. So no blueprint game.

Just a matchup game, just a matchup. Coaches being very familiar with one one another scheme in the timing of it. Man, that that's what happens. Sometimes it happens.

Wait, so as a coach yourself, do you if you know you know the opponent, if you know the opponent really well, do you start playing mind games with yourself where you're like, I know them, they know me, they think I'm going to do this, but then I'm going to do the opposite. But then they think I'm going to do the opposite, so I'm going do the original thing.

Now you're beating yourself. You just go with your strengths. So that's how I would do it.

It's like playing paper scissors shoot. You just get paralyzed with thought. There you go. And I can't do that. I just got to go with my script.

I'm excited for the takes that are going to come out saying, is it a good thing that the chiefs lost this early in the season that went that way? You don't have to worry about going 60, you know, everybody talking to him, you know, later on in the season. Oh, you got the perfect season going because then you start thinking about that too much and then that plays mind games with you.

What about the Dolphins, man? Yeah, come on. They're good. They're good. Feisty. The dolphins are good. They're not good. They're not good. Good. Today, Brian Force is a good coach. That's a fact. He's he's got man, he's got a bad roster and they're rebuilding. And he's it feels like the Dolphins every couple of weeks. They're in one of these games where it's like, whoa, what are the dolphins doing, man.

They look good.

Is Fitz magic baby? Yeah, that's right.

Stilgoe, have you ever been pump faked out by a quarterback like thirteen yards downfield like Fitzy likes to throw that pump fake leg he's going to attempt to forward pass after he's already gotten the first shot as a defensive back.

Did you ever bite on that bumpy. Yeah. Yeah, unbelievable, you wouldn't put it on that, would you? Oh, I'll be playing man to man come up here anyway. All right, Don, thank you as always. Get that lift in. Appreciate it. I'm going to try to find you getting pump fake. I'm going to post that.

Who's winning the night? See LeBron. Oh. Oh, no, no. There's not a game.

There's no basketball geek culture market right now. I'm saying it right now. The game starts right now. Heat by 12. I didn't even know there's a basketball game on. Game on right now. No, no, that's not right. I got baseball and football. That's all I see. Yeah, you're blind. All right.

See the crucial catch. Oh, by the way, speaking crucial catch. Did you see Mike Tomlin sweatshirt today? No, I meant to bring this up in the Steelers recap. Every team puts out like their version of the cancer awareness raising money for cancer charities, sweatshirts, and they all say different things on them. Usually it says like, for example, with Washington, like Washington football team, it's like the tie dye colors on it. Pittsburgh just said Pittsburgh is stronger than cancer.

Oh, they've had that for a while. Yeah. That's that's such an alpha. Yes. I imagine that they're like probably three or four dozen gingers that travel abroad every year and they like land in Paris and they're just wearing a shirt that says Pittsburgh is stronger than I imagine there are a few users who unfortunately get diagnosed with cancer.

And when the doctor says that, they're like, you don't send them from Pittsburgh. Cancer is a jagoff. Yeah, like there's no like, did you check my I.D. when I came in? They just put on them and they're like, well, we have this great treatment center.

Well, I just I can just put on the sweatshirt.

Yeah, I said French fries on my sandwich. I got this. Like, don't worry about it, doc.

All right, let's get football guy the week football guy, the week presented by Phillips, the one blade, the only tool that can trim edge and shape any like the hair pick up a specially marked one blade pastel pack nationwide where you could win up to a thousand dollars, the barstool store. And if you have your own football guy, look, we want to see them tweet your funniest gameday facial or body hair. Looks to part of my take apart my take using it to win it for a chance to win a special experience like playing a round of Mario party, sitting in on episode recording or watch a Thursday night football game with us will be choosing a new winner once a month.

Your style made simple Phillips Norelco one Blyde. Make sure you vote and tweet us TriMet to win it has to TriMet to win it at pardon my take. Thank you to Philipps and Roko, our film Stroker One Blade Football Guy The Week. Jake give us the nominees. All right Jake. Sorry about your heat. Took a game seven Tuesday night. Bigger things. Are you going to be watching Game seven Tuesday night or game three of the ALCS?

Which one will be on main TV?

I'm going to be prepping for our souls turns ping pong for Thursday. Oh, wow.

I just got Heynckes even got him doing the plugs moving forward. I just want to say, like the real winner, we should give credit. You know, you can talk about the champion or whatever you want to do, but it's bigger than basketball at this point. They didn't have a single confirmed coronavirus test for the entire time they were in the bubble. No, coach, I think that that is more noteworthy than whoever happened to win the title.

I agree. We can all agree on that. Right. Like, it would almost be selfish for a team to want to win the championship and take the shine away right. From the league's effort combating a global pandemic. Hmm.

Yeah. All right. On the job, football guy of the week starting off Soroka Steelers and Vance McDonald, who said he'd rather be.

Hmm, he said he'd rather block all game than catch one ball. Yeah, he is a very similar thing to say. I love it. Notre Dame offensive tackle. Todd, he put the same person.

We can agree on that, too. No, Todd, he no.

Because Todd Heap, we got introduced to him in it hard knocks great all time neke Todd Heap. But then he was always injured. Heath was a warrior.

Heath was out there for a while. Yes. Yes.

McDonald Every time you see him you think he the Notre Dame offensive tackle Liam Eichenberg because you tweeted this out, he continued to play in the Irish game versus Florida State despite suffering a brutal eye injuries. I was completely shocked.

How many beers? No, I don't think he. Well, no, I don't think you, like, take a mallet to your dick to get it in there.

How how thin of a penis would it take? It would have to be a piece of paper micropenis. Yes. His entire face. It looked like he got smashed with a brick. It was crazy.

And he played he couldn't open his entire left eye.

Georgia quarterback sets in Bennett after Georgia's win over Tennessee. He said, quote, I think we covered tonight. So that's good. And quote, that's the guy I can imagine the compliance officer running into.

Yeah. Yeah. So nice.

But yeah, they did cover preception. Bennett Excellent quarterback name. Yes.

And then Pensa fourth two. I think Panthers though, see Joe Brady, he tweets one or no after every Carolina win and nothing else since the season started. The last three tweets lost.

That is what I like that Twitter. That's not football guy thing, but he only uses it to tweet one or. No, I like that. Yeah.

So see I wouldn't vote on the poll.

I'm trying to think, yeah, I'm sure it's the thing where it's like he probably has an agent. It's like how, you know, your coach, you got to be on social media. Yeah. He was like, all right, you were pretending to be on social media. Like, I'm just going to tweet.

I would say that it's like I rather have kolkhoz wife type where the Twitter account.

Yeah. And all she was tweeting every week was just want to know his foundation ran it.

Yeah. Joe Brady Foundation. That helps kids in something. That's it. All right.

Help kids win national championships at LSU. Yes. Who's back of the week. Do we should we. I so much talk about the Lakers winning the NBA. My my who's back in the week.

We did do that. We already talked about it.

Everyone, you know, people have been saying whether or not he's the goat. I've had some personally, some not great things to say about him.

He won a championship today, which I think is pretty much undisputed. The last to go like this. So congrats, Seraphin.

Nadal won the French Open today. Number thirteen No.

Three dozen red clay ring is a ring. He sent a message in a bubble trophy on any other service besides Clay. It's a cheat code for him. No, he's one other. He is twenty twenty.

He wins all the fucking clay, a world championships, a world championship. It happens in the bubble that had the Joker do.

He lost item six love six two seven five oh oh my God.

Straight sets, big Kastoria, straight sets, pop bottles, Rafael Nadal.

All he does is win for he's quite rude. He's just clay. Quickly, Clay.

Now he's the goat. All right. Karunakara Undisputed go clay.

He's one dude.

He's one one twenty four five, six, seven, eight thirteen at Roland Garros.

Thirty nine to twenty on clay. One hundred and two is his record. Whatever. Twenty. Yeah.

It's a cheat code for he only suspended seven majors is nothing to scoff at.

He has more than seven. No I'm saying his twenty total. Oh yeah.

And how many Djokovic have now.

Probably nine. Oh you're so wrong. No less than he doesn't.

Seventeen hide. He's like ten years younger. This is the point. You guys can keep saying all you want.

Well the fact is Djokovic is going against Federer in his prime. Yeah, correct.

Now you're just doing this. But no, it's true. No, he's beating them every time they they don't.

Federer has got to beat each other as one who's won Federer. I don't know this that this stat I do not know this. That could go against me.

Twenty nine. Twenty seven. Joe, no. OK, thank you. No, no. Against Federer in championships in Djokovic and major championships.

Yeah.

Finals whatever I this could go against me. I don't know my tennis, I don't even like Djokovic. I watch one Wimbledon and I decided that I like that guy and I like the debate.

Didn't Rafa win like the greatest one, which is the day match debate is I even like tennis tie breaker. Yes, I like the debate. One always talks about the debate is all I want. And I think searching.

Rotha, end of the debate today. You know, it's just an unquestionable goat.

He didn't talk to me in five years. All right. My who's back of the week is shirtless Charles Smith, shirtless Charisse Mossback. I'm not sure why he's shirtless, but he hasn't had a shirt on for twelve hours now. So shout out to shirtless Jerry Smith.

How do you win something? He's just happy. So how how big of a party do you think Jerry Smith is going to personally have upon getting to exit the bubble, like we're going to go fucking nuts for what he's going to be celebrating, not being in the bubble anymore? Oh, yes. He's probably going to get a bong. A bubbler made to recreate what the bubble looked like to Disney World was wide world of sports and just have it permanently installed, whereas fireplace should be.

Mm hmm. I agree. All right. My who's back? I have to one is Jason Kidd being a great coach because I don't know who won tonight, but I know Jason Kidd was on staff, so he was in the finals.

Clearly a mistake by the Bucs to fire that guy. Absolutely. Because he now has a ring as a coach, not a head coach, but a coach. So he has got to piss people off. Flags fly forever.

Yeah. And Janice's brother has one, too. Yes, that's right. That's right. And then my other. Who's back? His team's not being back. Big weekend for the teams not being back. Texas and Miami lose. Miami got the shit kicked out of him. Texas came furiously back and fell short against Oklahoma. We'll have to just wait till next year.

We've got 11 six joka and grand slam matches. Oh, not in their prime in a row.

Yeah, not. Oh, so you Pat. Interesting. How did his stats interest this. Roger elevons once Roger Setas brain melt out of like Tom Brady. Why the stats.

By beating him somehow so happy, so sick before that it was six five when it really counted. Oh wow.

Including this year's all the open straight sets in the semifinal. How embarrassing was that was a joke. That should be a 65 year old Roger Federer.

So start twenty. Mm. Fourteen the last time.

OK, Fed beat Djokovic in a grand slam is twenty twelve.

Oh wow. So twenty fourteen. Roger Federer. Twenty four. Thirty two years old.

So to say that that not price is like thirty six at the point. No that's not true.

That thriller Wimbledon finals when it started six in a row. Damn that's too bad.

Yeah. And then the Lakers won. Whatever. Do you have a who's back. Brooks. Blake when it would happen.

Oh yeah. He's back. He's physically back. Yes. Massas coming up, what do you have to say about your heat? You've got to give him some kind of credit. I was telling you, let's talk about the heat. He really won. Yeah.

I mean, no one expected them to get this far. Jimmy is a star. He's not going anywhere.

Hopefully the rest of his career, he's literally probably not going and he's probably not leaving the bubble. He's going to stay in the bubble until he makes like three hundred three pointers.

And what were the Ionis coming through? People who are going to get mad at us for not talking with the NBA finals. But honestly, talk to I have to. And I also like I don't know how to feel about the NBA finals until the ratings come out, once the ratings come out and I can see how many people watched it and how popular it was, then I will tell you, if it was a good finals, you know how many people watched in person zero.

Right. So that's the most we did, right? Well, eastern.

Yeah. And but I, I'm a ratings guy. Like, I can enjoy a sport unless I know a lot of people are also watching it. Like if there are less people watching it than last year, I'm out.

Hank, as much as I hate them, I did.

This is the fact that this is a conversation is funny, but I had him on LeBron after and the new debate is now would. Thirty five year old LeBron Pete. Twenty eight year old LeBron. Good.

Let them fight each other. I say LeBron said thirty five but.

Well, yeah, the advancement of HGH. I see. Thirty five year old LeBron would definitely when I see yes I fucking xmen at this point he's got more dad's strength. Yeah. Taco Tuesday. I'm just happy for Caruso and keep my man KCP Javal. Yeah. Dwight Dwight.

Current guest Dwight Howard has never liked it to why like Dwight KCP Kuzma Tacos.

No dude I love Kuzma Fuck that whatever LeBron Let's see if he can win it with fans That's all I got to say.

I don't know I think LeBron probably it was easier on him knowing that fewer people are watching at home.

I really just wanted a game seven because I was like maybe we get a coin flip, maybe we get to get The Bachelorette right. Oh I guess that segment has come back. Yeah, yeah. You know, we're going to tape early on Tuesday for like that.

Would LeBron say about like he wants we have to respect or something like, oh, the NFL game, if the NFL game happens, we will.

What he wanted more respect, Bron said, I want my damn respect to who isn't giving them respect. No one. Seriously, like no one. No one's you people do the LeBron hater.

Do the LeBron lovers do the what is it wrong? They know that we're we've never like we got beat. I still think MJ is better, but like LeBron is incredible. Yeah. He's won four titles. What can you say.

Can you say can you say King Skip Bayless immediately tweeted. Yeah, right. He tweeted out MJ, he's been like that in a million greater than signs. LeBron Yeah.

Oh, I like game seven. Better finals like two years ago when he beat the Celtics. That's why I was like, fuck, yeah, it's been tough. It's kind of been over for once. He won the the the ring in Cleveland, but that was after that.

Well, for me. I can tell it was like he kind of the big three kind of like it was back and forth. Yeah. But then once he came back with the Cavs and kept skull fucking silence, he was like, yeah, once he won the ring in Cleveland.

It's kind of been over since then. Like he's it's all Kyrie.

He's the second best player of all time. That's really nice on his team. Could Katie go into the Warriors.

Sort of what could have been a potential big run.

I don't I don't agree with that. I think he probably would have lost.

He well he's appears yes, he's won a good amount, but he is also a prolific loser. He's like the Roger Federer of the NBA.

Yes. LeBron enjoys LeBron enjoys losing in the finals.

Why would he do it so much? He's done it six times. He's only won four finals. He clearly likes doing one more than the other. Takes his foot off the gas. Yeah.

All right. That's the show he's got. No, you've got to we've got to have someone fashionability.

That means I can't even say yes. Thanks for helping the Lakers win because you kept saying seventeen every time you said seventeen.

No, not twenty two. Seventeen, twenty one. Twenty to thirty. Been taking chances to do another twenty three and Jae. Fifty to some random guy today said twenty two today, oh, OK, I was like, what do you mean twenty two been. Yeah, yeah. Love you guys. My fun fact of the day notability. Do it.

Billy, what's your funny animal fact of the day, guys? My phone Animal of the Day is sometimes when you rub a toad's pussy enough it will turn purple because it died.

Comes to come guys. I got school.

I love you guys said again. Thank you.

I played in a decade this track at the end. What Dick Distractor. He wrote a distracted by me last week. We talked about it in the interview, so I wrote a distraction on him to motivate him to greatness in Sunday Night Football. Guess I think that it worked. Yeah. Can we say that it worked. Yeah. It's like George Kittles dad writing him a letter on an NFL Sunday to motivate him.

Might have to do this again sometime. Dekay part of my take the job.

Kate, you're getting my morning mixed in the south. She can break her cousin's heart like a great power ballad, kind of savvy chick song like, pfft, being made in The Australian, actually intimidating the planet fitness kind of look a big I got a six pack, a purple. So I'm drunk and I'm like, you're Hollywood. Your dream translates to editing seats. Go ahead and get your popcorn. Like 1972 or twice at all. Just because you can't drop to support your fantasy ownership when you're on a pie, you keep one of your problems.

You know, JK Dobbins, only to come true to finish was a Baskin Robbins. One girl ready to go. Into the talk is a celebration.