So Kelly, I was reading your book, and I was feeling really sad for you when I was reading it. A twelve-year career at the top level of athletics, and you didn't tell a single person that you were gay. What was it? Were you ashamed?

No, far from it. I think no, never, never been ashamed of who I am. It's more fear, fear of society, fear of the judgments, maybe the belittling of my extraordinary career and achievements, fear of the army, life that I lived in and the worry of what the replications would be if I had admitted that I'd be gay in my serving career when it's against the law to be gay. So there's a multitude of things. And as time goes on, that fear exacerbates. It just gets bigger and bigger and bigger, and then you don't know what to do.

Being gay in the army when you were in it was illegal. Tell us the things that traumatized you, which come out in your book.

So a couple of things there, basically. I didn't know I was gay when I joined. So when people go, Well, why did you join if you knew that it was against law? Well, I didn't know I was gay. I mean, I was a teenager. You just find yourself at some stage. Then knowing that that was the law, then, of course, you then have to be really careful because first and foremost, I wanted to be in the military since I was 14, and I wanted a career. I wanted to prove to everybody around me, I'm going to be the soldier and I'm going to have a career because I wasn't academic at school. Sport was my savior. It was who I was. Joining the army gave me purpose. When I joined the army and I was 22 years old, we had the RMPs, Royal Ministry of Police, come and raid our barracks. Raid means that they will come into your place of living, completely destroy everything around you, trying to find something that might insinuate you.

Well, yours is a story of great resilience and perseverance and fighting for what you wanted. And eventually, you got what you wanted, which was two gold medals at the Olympics. Can you still do the face?

Oh, that wasn't the face. Do it again. Oh, no. It's the eyes popping out the air, didn't it? Well, the thing is, I never thought I'd get two gold medals. I mean, that was a surprise for me as well. I'm a big dreamer, big I believe in having a goal, following it and never giving up on it. But I never thought I'd win two goals. Hence the face when crossed the line with the eyes popping out of their head. I'd run the 800 meters, which was not my dream. It was the 1500 meters, and that was second in my Olympic program, three races for the 800, three for the 15. So when I crossed the line in the eight in gold, I didn't believe it. Then when I realized I'd won, the hardest thing was actually to pretend I hadn't won it and go again to achieve my dream. That's resilience. But the main resilience is also picking yourself up when it's gone horribly wrong. I'd had seven years out of that, 12 injured.

Do you wish you could go back and do it all again as a free person as yourself?

Well, yeah, because it led me to a life of mental health problems. The year before I won my two gold medals, had a breakdown and became a self-harmer. I mean, that was a bit of trauma between being injured and wanting sport to be the thing that fulfilled me because that was the thing that made me happy in that sense and feel validated as a person. But on the other side, when you're just not happy in your you, it becomes so intense that actually that's all that matters. You put everything into the one thing about achieving, but you forget about your health. I still achieved. I mean, I won 13 international medals at Commonwealth European World and Olympics, including those two Olympic gold medals with everything that was going on. So in my head, I just think, God, if I was clearer and happier, maybe I would have been gold medalist at everything. That's what I believe.

I'm sure you're right. Athletes are going to be paid bonuses at the Olympics this year for winning medals. Do you think that's right? Do you think that's fair?

The problem with having money, it becomes greed. It becomes a focus rather than the dream. It becomes less the pride and more about what you're getting from it. There is that thing about mentality of who comes into the sport who really just wants to have that gold medal around their neck and the National Anthem playing and the flag flying, which was only my dream. I never thought one second past that. Now, if there's a financial element, it becomes a little bit more, I can't win because I might get money from it. But you still got to be an Olympic champion to do it. There's that balance. I think it's both. I think I hope the testing system is rigid enough to ensure that the people winning the gold medals are winning them effectively clean, and they're getting almost what I'd say is that you're getting a well done now.

World athletics have taken a very definitive stance on trans women competing in athletics, and it is no. At the moment, it's a very firm, no, they can't. It's not fair to biological women. The IDOC have not taken that stance. Should they have been firmer? Should the IDOC come out and be more definitive rather than just saying to every sport, I'll do your own thing?

I think there needs to be clearer guidelines around every single aspect of this conversation. I think there isn't enough research, resources, science, and everything behind every single part of this discussion, because if you actually put some sports into the mix around maybe snooker and darts and those, is it a gender advantage or not? You know what I mean? So there are certain things. What I wish would happen is some solution is put forward, because when you're talking about trans people from a human point of view, it's people that want to live the life that they live. They love sport, and they cannot do it anywhere. It doesn't mean just because you're trans transition that you no longer love sport. What's hurting is that both sides of the coin are fighting because biological women will obviously fight because we've always had a fight for gender equality and participation, et cetera. Trans women will fight now just for existence and to be part of something in the world. So please just come up with some Blooming decision and situation that allows everyone to do sport, but then say what that means.

Finally, last question. What would your message be to other people out there who are struggling with what you struggled with? Are you happy now?

Yeah, absolutely. I mean, yeah. Would I not like to have been through almost the Helen back that I found myself in and have a decision to live or to not? Why should it have taken society to put me into that position of choosing what I should do with my life? But then I took the hold of that and realized that actually I'm worthy, I matter. I've worked hard for every single achievement that I've ever achieved, and I want other people to be inspired by that.

And they are.Thank you so much.Thank you.Thank you.Thank you.Thank you.