Is. The one thing this dog has taught me is that the dumb shit you do in front of another person is amplified when you own a dog together. Like, when I didn't know how to do stuff when we first got her as a puppy. And they'd be like, I don't know. And then you'd be like, I don't know. I can't imagine what parents go through. Like that fear of like, did we fuck up? Did we fuck this thing?

Every little weird thing she does, you're like, what did we do that caused that?

Yeah. And then you worry if you got city dog. Whenever I walk her in the city, I'm always like, does she suck as a dog?

She does.

I don't think she does, but in.

Ways she kind of sucks at dog stuff. She sucks at stuff that other dogs seem to just be totally natural doing.

I don't see every other dog that.

I walking towards anything that I saw that today. You did? I've never seen it.

Well, you know what I saw? And this is just a little inside us walking our dog baseball.

Look how much taller your camera is.

It has to be. I'm imposing. This is for me.

Are these supposed to be directed towards my face?

Yes.

Cool.

I saw a dog. You know, when we try to cross 6th Avenue, she'll always try to push up when you turn the corner, she'll go like that. I saw a dog doing that when I left therapy today.

Cool.

I saw a dog, like, trying to pull up, and I'm like, all right, okay. Other dogs are doing that. Our dog doesn't suck as much, but.

Smelling everything walking her in the city is a nightmare. I hate it. And I know she doesn't like it either. So then I feel even worse that I'm like, well, neither of us are enjoying this, but we got to get you out of the house.

Yeah. When we moved into Manhattan, Myrtle was I thought she would be fine, and instead she was like, less grass? What the fuck?

You found a place with less grass?

And so she takes it out on us by trying to eat everything she comes across, which you know what I respect?

I respect the hell after dinner sometimes frustrating. So what we're saying is having a.

Dog in New York sucks.

How do you guys have kids?

I don't know. If you have a backyard, have a kid and a dog. Just get nuts. One of the best parts of being engaged, getting ready to get married is.

Especially just what are we getting ready?

I think we're just going to get married. A single thing we could tell the people the honest to God truth, which.

Is let it out on the table.

Right. We haven't planned anything. And both of us are kind of like, we'll just go get married at some point.

I think we're just going to go get married.

But then we also know if we go get married without planning anything, we'll never plan anything.

Oh, you mean like people that say they're going to get married and then have the party after? And we're like, that's us. And every single person I've said that to has said, plan the party first and then get married. I'm like, well, if I'm planning a party, then I'll just plan a wedding. And then I'm in this loop.

If we just get married, we're going to do it.

It's eventually what's going to happen as you're preparing to marry somebody, which we'll pretend that we are doing, which is fun. I googled dresses. I took a look. I joined a subreddit.

Everybody with their parents, no matter your relationship with your parents, especially if you're an only child. Especially if you're an only child.

That's why it's fascinating to me.

Yeah, you're waiting for someone else to be there, to be like, did you hear this shit? So you can just be like, this is nuts. Yeah, I'm not crazy, right? So Jay wanted to tell the story on the first episode of the podcast, but I was, no, no, we can tell the lady getting thrown from the car story, ejected from the vehicle, which.

I wasn't there for, which was devastating for me. They came back and told me, and I was like, I missed it.

Oh, dude. We had to bring her out and be like, you have no idea what you missed. So before we went up to stay there, katie and I went to my mom's house for dinner. My mom gets very excited. She loves Katie.

I love her.

Yeah, she's great. My mom's the biggest sweetheart in the world. She loves having us there, cooks. She cooks. She's so excited for us to be there. Whenever we show up, she shows up. She's like, you guys, it's very sweet.

Two cute dogs.

But sometimes we laugh at stuff that she does, and she doesn't understand why we're laughing. And we're like, well, because you're doing mom shit. You're doing, like, crazy mom shit, right? And my mom does the craziest mom shit. Because it's been she and I the entire time.

Whole time, just you two.

And Katie finally understands the roommate dynamic, where you just share stuff with your mom where you're like, I would never say that to my mom.

It's fascinating.

It's fascinating.

You didn't have an ally. You didn't have like, I'd go to my brother. You had Kevin tell my brother. And my brother would be like, don't tell that to mom and dad. Or I'd be like, did mom do this to you? And he'd be like, yeah, she does that. You just got to deal with it like this. You had nobody to confirm your reality no. To conspire with or to intervene on your behalf. It was just raw, you two to each other.

It really was two camera. It was always two camera.

No aside.

Right down the pipe, dude. Right down the barrel, just right there. I mean, she would come home from dates and be like, well, that guy drinks too much. And you're like, I'm nine. I'm scared of the basement. Still. I don't know if this should be the conversation we're having. So, Katie, we were talking about something.

I remember what we were talking I.

Remember what it was. We were making fun of her and her neighbor. No, we won't share that. We have a running joke with my mom and her neighbor that my mom really does not like, where we're like, your neighbors want you. And my mom's like, stop it, you guys. Stop it. That's the exact energy she hits me with. You guys need to stop. I feel like, what did she say? She's like, I feel like I'm playing the straight man here.

Oh, I guess I'll just be the straight man. I was just like, oh, we're just joking.

That was her nice way of being.

Like, you stop making fun of me. Please stop making fun of me.

So we do this running joke about how all of her neighbors want her. And then we were talking about katie brought up my mom's in her mid seventy s, and Katie was like, are you retired?

I think I asked her if she was out of the game, asked if she was really done looking for any, interested in any like, she's just not out of the game.

She goes, are you retired? And my mom goes, well, it would take a very specific set of things, which we did float the idea. Would you go on golden bachelor? She said no, right?

That's another reason we were talking about it.

We were talking about gold brought it up. Golden bachelor.

How much more sad it is when they let a golden bachelor go home. Golden bachelor it is.

A loser leaves town match every week. It's a career match.

It's also tough because they just had to pour it on the thickest for themselves because they have to present to TV that like, I've been through this and this, but I've got one last shot at love. They all just gave that speech and are leaving and are like, so I guess I'm retired now.

They all do the same thing. Being alone can be rewarding. I've got my cats, and I've got my mitchell's memory. Oh, my remember when they're having dead spouse off in that one episode? They're like, I lost my spouse. And he's, no, no, I lost my spouse. And you're like, damn, this is spouse.

So we were talking about that. Trish said she would not do golden.

Bachelor, but she said if it was a rich guy who loved, she gave her all time thing or whatever. And out of nowhere, my mom just volunteers her body count. She just goes, no joke.

I looked over at him and was like, did she just say what I think.

She you know that noise of a fork hitting a plate? That's what it was. The second I go, Jesus. I was, like, laughing. It's one of those things where you're appalled, you're embarrassed, but also, it's so funny. We're talking about on the podcast, she.

Goes, I dated a lot of men. And then I dated and said the number. Yeah, which we'll leave doing is editing out the number.

She will watch this because it's on YouTube. Love you, mom.

I want to really set that scene. We're talking about this kind of stuff, but this was I've dated a lot of men. I've dated between the years of she gave a span this.

She said ten years in a number. And it made me want to crawl into a hole and die.

Shocking. Not just the number itself, the fact that she said it to us and that I just looked over of like, what do we do now?

And we were both like, I was laughing. No, I walked away after the next one. I Def Jam walked away on the next part. That wasn't a real walk away. That was a legitimate Def Jam audience member a walk away. I was laughing so hard. So we went like, oh. And Katie being sweet and polite, she goes, well, where'd you meet all these wonderful gentlemen?

How did you find that many interesting men?

That's what it was. And she said, they weren't all interesting. And we went, okay. And I'm like, at this point, I'm starting to be like, I don't know if I want to eat anymore. We got Danny dipping sauce on the table. So my mom puts down stuff. Dude, this was like, you think your mom showing people baby pictures is embarrassing? Or pictures when you're little in the bathtub is embarrassing? No, it's when your mom puts mustard and mayonnaise mixed on the table and goes, I put down some Danny dipping sauce. Dan loved this when he was a kid. Yeah. When I was five, I was eating, goes, oh.

And I said, what are these? What are these sauces?

She goes yum yum sauce.

Yum yum sauce. And that's Danny's dipping sauce. And I just was like but we.

Were laughing at Danny because she said it like Katie was going to know. She said it like it was known. We kept joking around that she was leaning into the microphone like a lead singer saying she's going to play a hit. She goes, thank you all very much for coming out tonight. This next one's, Danny Dippin'sauce.

They never play this.

Like that. Right there is next up. My friend Reginald wrote this one. You guys might know it as yum yum sauce.

This was after she had said this next one's called Taco Meat on a Baguette.

My mom makes appetizers, some of the best appetizers in the world. They're unbelievable. I'm very lucky that my mom makes appetizers.

Delicious little pockets of cheese and meat and delicious goodness. And most of them have cute little names. These are buffalo chicken pot stickers. These are tacorio egg rolls.

We were smoking weed in the basement, and my mom was down there hanging out with us, and she pulled them out of the freezer, and she goes, these are met. What was it?

She goes, this is something new I was working on. I had a little bit of leftover taco meat. I mixed it with some cheese, and I put it on a baguette. This is taco Meat on a baguette.

Taco meat on a baguette.

I think the name needs a little workshop with the first thing you like.

You could probably spruce that name up.

You really sold it and then told me exactly you just summed up what you said.

Call it like, a Rio de Janeiro sunrise or something.

Taco Meat on little slice of bread.

And put in the call that Albuquerque.

Open faced taco I don't know. Taco meat on a baguette.

And this is taco Meat on a baguette.

Her reaction was like, oh, well, bumping.

My mom out always sucks, because she's like, no, we're having fun. I don't want to bum you out.

Joking. No shell, sweet, perfect angel. And it was delicious. That taco meat on a baguette.

Taco Meat on a baguette did fucking.

Slap when she plays it. Next time.

Hear those opening chords? Taco meat on a baguette. She hasn't done this since, like, the live album.

So the Danny's dipping sauce is on the table.

Everything's on the table.

Everyone's having their dips.

We're dipping. We're eating. She brings up the body count.

How'd you meet so many interesting men? They weren't all interesting. And then I said, where'd you meet that many men? Something else happened. We got distracted. We kind of moved on. Then she has a bite of food.

In her mouth, eating a bite.

And Katie probably taco Meat on a.

Baguette might have been. And Katie says, where'd you meet all and she says, they weren't that interesting. She goes back to eating, and she goes, so where did you meet all of these guys? And my mom, she eats, and she goes, Craigslist like that. And oppenheimer'd the room. I mean, I got up and walked out of the room like a def jam set. I was like, dude, me, Katie, Christine, and Jay were laughing about that. For three days straight out of nowhere, jay would be getting a water out of a cooler. And he'd go, craigslist, the finger point. The finger point fucking destroyed the room. I think that's one of the hardest I've ever laughed. I had a hard time breathing.

Oh, my God. It was just so funny. I almost thought we had dropped it. And she's, like, looked at me and she points, and I'm like, where is this?

And she did the thing, like, mid byer. She goes, Craigslist like that. And then we had to explain to her that our generation doesn't use Craigslist like that.

We know Craigslist for sex workers, couches misconnections, even MFM.

You and Jay were saying that when we drove up that night and we told him that story. Jay goes, Wait, so Trish is just lurking around w four M. I was like, yeah, casual Encounters is my mom trying to find me a stepdad? This is where we're going to break down and do Reads. We might change it as it goes. We have no idea what the fuck we're doing here at this podcast, so we're going to learn. But if you're in San Francisco, I'm going to be at Cobbs the 17th and 18 November, and then Albany, New York. I'll be coming to the funny bone. I haven't been there in a while. I'll be there November 29 for one night. Albany, Fuddy, Bone, and then Vermont. I'll be at the Vermont Comedy Club. I don't know why I said it that way. That sounded weird, like I've never said the word Vermont before. But I have Vermont Comedy Club. I will be there the 30 November through December 2. And then, of course, December eigth royal Oak Theater in Royal Oak, Michigan. Buckhead Theater in Atlanta, december 9. And then the following week, I will be at the Vogel Red Bank.

Early shows sold out. We added a late show. You can get tickets to that. And then December 16, the Fillmore in Philadelphia, and then that's it for 2023. So go to Dancer.com for those live dates. And again, we hope we're enjoying the podcast. Myrtle's at the door. She thinks Jay is still in here because she's obsessed with them in her seventy s. And she goes, I don't go on there anymore. And we were like, I don't know if you can go.

I don't even know if it works anymore.

I don't know if it works.

Like that still a thing.

I don't know.

I got roommates off Craigslist. Never a date, though.

I got my apartment in Queens that I lived in for 17 years off.

Craigslist and a Futon. I also got a futon off Craigslist, my mom. That Futon that you sat on, that.

Shitty futon Futon that I did Bonfire and 6th and Jump from until you.

Bought yourself another chair that sucked.

A video game chair. Katie, I've learned, does her research on products and looks it up and is like, no, that's good. And I don't he's a trigger puller. I aim middle of the pandemic. I was like, oh, I'm going to buy a video game chair to podcast and do the radio show. And I just bought one. And it came and we assembled it, and Katie was like, did you look up what this one was? And I was like, I didn't.

And then we did Google's Video Game Chair. I clicked, I paid.

And then we looked it up, and it was one of the worst ones. It was like a two star.

It wouldn't lean back.

The back wouldn't lean back.

You had to sit straight up. I was like, who's playing video games like this?

And then we found out it did lean back, but the whole thing leaned.

And it made a loud pop where it would make you feel like the whole thing was going to yeah, it.

Wasn'T a great chair, but it was pretty awful.

Took it the second we put it in the lobby.

Yeah, someone in the old building took it, so you're welcome. But, dude, that body count was too funny. That was one of the most like I'm so glad someone was there to laugh, because a lot of times it was me, my mom, and her boyfriend. And he's in boyfriend mode, right, guys dating my mom were always representative. Yeah. He's like, no, that's cool. No, Craigslist is totally cool. Yeah, you should totally get dick off Craigslist.

Meanwhile, I'm like, Is this so this is normal. That's why I can't imagine growing or what my opinion on dating would be or my view of dating would be if I grew up watching my mom do it. I never had to do that.

Kids of single moms, it'd be really interesting to talk to someone else that went through it on how you relate, how you relate.

I'll get out of here.

Yeah, you had a lovely married family. Fucking dork. Sorry.

It helps. I don't think they like each other very much.

They're still together, but it's holding on.

You can tell they got heat.

Well, I never thought it was weird until I did a podcast one time, and the person that was on the podcast was like, oh, so you were the only kid around your mom was dating? Did you ever try to scare them off or fuck with them? And I was like, oh, no.

Like from a movie.

I'm a people pleaser.

Yeah, you wanted them to all like you. It was just tiny little auditions. They were just coming to your house.

I was a little butler. I'd come in the house and I'd be like, so do you think playing with toys is gay? Okay, I'll stay away from that. Now, would you be interested in a stepson that runs up the stairs at the basement when he turns the light off? That's a no. Okay. You have kids of your own. I will not get along with no.

Don'T bring them here.

That was what I was lucky is my mom. I had a stepdad, but my mom never married anybody with kids, because I think I would have been very territorial. I'm bad at sharing stuff.

Yeah.

Like, we each have our own video game console for a reason.

Well, part of that reason is because you can't play video games with a person you're sitting next to anymore. In order to play video games with someone, you have to have two video.

Game consoles when we smoke pot. You bring up some points sometimes that as a lifelong pothead, I rarely have that. Like, oh, but you've done it to me twice. One time was just recently, your brother Kevin was visiting. We love Kevin, the captain of our Rocket League team.

The best.

He's the best. And he was in New York for a work trip. And we play Rocket League online with him and his friends every night with Gagney and DRO and other people. We get on this.

You don't have to do this. It's very nice of you. It's very nice of you. I'll tell you what, does not get a name drop on your new podcast.

But in the chat, they're going to be like, hey, thanks for Sampy. I started hitting all of them. Convoy. I'm getting all of this. You guys did it all. But I feel comfortable in saying your brother is the captain of our Rocket League 100%. He's the best Rocket League team. So he was in town and we were like, oh, come over and play Rocket League. But the way video games are now, it used to be if you had a system, you would just have to worry about having controllers. Like, oh, we've got three controllers we can play. But now we each had to be in separate rooms.

We had to have three different TVs, three different video games.

He brought his switch, we had our consoles, and then we all met online to play.

We were hanging out in three different rooms together. Fascinating.

It's crazy that that's where video games.

But that also makes me it just makes me get kids and how their experience of video game is completely different from ours. And part of that is because they want to make the most money. You need a PlayStation, not just a controller, not just a friend who has video games like you used to socially go to the friend. We did not have N 64. We got a Sega Genesis. And then our parents were like, you're out for a while, out of the game. This is your thing.

Did they make that like a public thing of like did you and Kevin try to push for a 64?

I think so. I mean, I imagine so. We used to rent a 64. You could rent it for like a week.

Yeah, a weekend.

And we would just do nothing but play video games.

What was your guys'favorite game when you.

Were it was just Mario. I just knew Mario. I had brand recognition with Mario. And it was Mario, that 3D where you could walk around to all those castles and go into the rooms and then jump into the pictures and you could do like, yeah, waha yeehee. That like triple jump thing he does. God damn, I love that game. But I wasn't good at it.

Yeah.

Because I never had enough time with a machine to get like, it's gone. Catching a groove, play with it anymore. But you would have a friend who had N 64 and you would like, go to that friend's house, and I would say you even kept a friend around that maybe wouldn't even be that good of a friend if they didn't have that N 64. Or the basement that was finished, that had all the DVDs. We owned like three DVDs or VHS. We never owned movies or anything. We had, like, It's a Wonderful Life, Beauty and the Beast, struggling to think of a third Ferris Bueller's Day Off. And those were like the movies of our house.

My mom had we had VHS that were all kodak black and yellow. Because the free weekends of movie channels.

She would record them with the camcorder.

No, not with a camcorder.

You could plug the camcorder into record off the TV. And then you would just have to either remember when they came out with those VHS tapes, where you could just pop the tape from the camera into the VHS.

I remember those.

Game changer.

So we would take just on our VCR, we could record off the TV. So she would pop a thing in and be like, I feel like at.

Some point they stopped you from being able to or pay per views. You couldn't do that with pay per views.

Yeah, but she would write down, like, on HBO, it's the Big Chill. Like, movies I didn't do.

We had the Mash, the finale of Mash.

And then you would go in our laundry room and there'd just be these three shelves of secondhand tapes that were just taped off HBO. That's why my HBO special the reason that beginning meant so much was that was on so many tapes of ours. Because when you're watching a movie, you're like, oh, the special presentation, that's awesome. But my mom video games were like, when video games came out, my mom was like, you're not going to get video games. You go outside to play. You play sports. Go outside and play. And my dad was still living in Denver. It was like the months after my parents got divorced. And my mom was like, you're not getting a Nintendo. And my dad was like, I'll get you a mean.

The more I hear about your dad, the more I'm like, of course. You were the biggest fan of his. He did the easy thing. That was the hugest win. And your mom seemed like a person who was like, you can't have anything good. You can't have him. You can't have video games.

You can't have she was, no. And we got to Nintendo. And then what was cool about my mom is once I got a Nintendo, my mom was like, all right, you play video games. Like, you just can't play all the time. But all right. So then for Christmas, I got a Sega, and then like, years later got a 64.

Cool.

And then I bought myself a PlayStation Two high school job. Pretty cool. But I remember no one wanted to come over to my house because the 64 was in the living room. And either my mom or her boyfriend were always watching.

You didn't have, like, a space.

Couldn't be like, guys, we want to play Perfect Dark. But you go to other people's houses. So now with video games, we're both into it because for the separate rooms. But the point you made about no one being in the same room, the reason I bring this up is all the commercials now for gambling sites, everybody and this podcast will probably eventually you'll see me being like, hey, guys, don't forget to use Shoulder.

Use code DraftKings. Check out my parlay.

MGM grand. Check out Dan's Pick of the week. We don't have that yet. Probably will. But Katie had a good point when we saw Jamie Fox, who was the other massive celebrity that was doing it?

Oh, I mean, everybody but all these.

People that are doing sites, we were watching TV, and Katie goes, they should have to post their parlays. They should have to post how much they used.

How much money did you use, Kevin Hart? How much money did you put on the game this week? What was the bet and how much did you lose? Bam.

I got another $200. Bam. And you're like, then I want to watch you bet it. The whole commercial should be like, Colts look good. It's just him going through and figuring it out. And he goes, is sure you're pitching? I don't know. I feel like we're in the age now where everybody's in a commercial and no one uses the product they're in 100%. Like, back in the day, like, Arnold Schwarzenegger had to go to Japan.

Matt Rife. Matt Rife uses blue chew. And if he does, then I've got a real issue with him being our hot boy comic of the moment. Because my hot boy comic doesn't need Blue Chew.

That's wild. When you showed me that, I was like, that's insane.

I was like, how is this who's.

Advising you to do you're the sexiest comic? And someone's like, this is erection Aid. Erection a thing now? Like, are younger guys in their 20s.

Having are they really shit? Okay, sorry. Then you're doing it happens to everybody, apparently.

Porn addiction everywhere.

If you could watch anything fuck anything, why would you go just have a normal relationship when you could type in two different things and someone's got those things fucking each other somewhere?

This is going to be the oldest I sound outside of talking about fucking Nintendo 64. When the Internet first came out and people would find a weird video and you had to gather to watch it, where they'd be like, Tannenbaum was the one, my friend, that would find videos. And he'd be like, did you see the guy fuck the horse? And you're like, no. And he's like, do you want to see it? And you're like, no, I don't want to see it. How did you find it? One time I was at his house and we were smoking weed in his garage. And he's like, I got a video to show you. And you're like, fuck. And you go in, and it was a guy fucking a fish.

Oh, my God.

With his dick. And you're like, but that's what the Internet was. So to me it's like, oh, well, you go to your friend's house and they show you a disturbing video that.

You didn't want to see. But now you're a different man for having seen it.

Now you seafood because you watched a man violate a trout. But it was one of those things where I joked about it early in my standup career, but I never thought it would actually take fruition. Where at one point I said, I think on my Comedy Central special, I said, these kids now are going to be I go in.

Which one is it from?

Which bit did I reference?

Not special.

You're on the clock.

Not special.

But in the bit I said, they're going to be like grizzled porn producers by the time they're 13 and be like, what is that, double anal? I'm eating my cereal. It's not enough for me.

But it is happening.

I guess it's happening.

And blue chew is there for you.

Think about your high school crush on only fans. Oh, my God.

Excuse me.

Yeah, think about he said for you.

I thought about it. And a girl's not supposed to go there. That wouldn't ever happen.

Just young boys jacking it on only fans.

Imagine my high school crush on only fans. Okay?

Isn't that just like he was so cute. Yeah, but would you want to see him being, like, thanking the people that were tipping?

That's not really what we look up. We're not like, let me look at a guy jerking off.

Hey, in sync fanatic. I would love to do that. I'm trying to think of the usernames of the girls in your high school that would be watching your high school.

Grudge, where he goes, hey, Ryan Cabrera.

Hey, Dawson. Hey, thanks, Dawson. Squirt. All right. He starts jacking up. He's like, TRL anal. All right. That's weird. Didn't see that one coming. Yeah, that's got to be the world's.

I feel so bad for the kids. I just feel so bad for the kids.

It's all the shit you said on podcast.

Not even just like, the pandemic. During the pandemic, I was like, damn, imagine if this was your senior year of high school. Or like, damn, imagine this was like, your freshman year of college. Or, damn, imagine this was any of those years you look back at as like, oh, I really needed to go through the typical experience of that, whether it was a good experience or a bad experience. The typical experience of that would have moved me into the next chapter of my life. And those people didn't get that. But then I also think about the way technology is, the way that socializing in general is. It's so different for them than it is for us. And I just feel like there isn't somebody counteracting that with like I don't know, I just feel like these kids need love. Yeah, love so bad.

I mean, I think it's been brought up in multiple stand up bits, but I do think there's some truth to the fact that social media will become the smoking of our generation.

Whereas oh, you do that.

Or just like, you know the way when we see kids now from the 20s that were chimney sweeps, and they're like, nine, smoking a cigarette, like, waiting to go back to work, and we're like, what the that's going to be like? I hope I don't know. But you hope in 30 years that's going to be people being like, you just were allowed to be on Instagram when you were eleven. That is wild.

Is wild. And it doesn't feel like people are getting more strict about it feels like it's going the other way. Or instead of it being like, no, yeah, you can't get on this till you're 21. I've seen what it is now. People are like, well, what am I going to do? Tell him he can't be on it? Yeah, my mom would. My mom used to say if a guy wanted to take me on a date in middle or high school, which very few did. But if they did, if they had already decided they wanted to jump through this hoop, I had to light it on fire by saying you have to come to the door, knock on the door, talk to my parents, and then we'll go out. Nobody ever was like, yeah, I'll do that.

Can I be honest, though? Is your soon to be husband kind of glad that you were like, bacon in the oven like that? You know what I mean? I'm kind of glad that no one took you out. So I'd get you, I'd get you.

Bacon in the oven.

You're just like, getting more seasoning, getting more flavor. You're all funny and shit. You weren't out in high school being cool, getting fingered.

Oh, no, I wasn't. I got fingered.

Okay. Not on the just wasn't a lot. Edit that out.

It wasn't a lot.

So you don't see me get angry. Start punching, Mike. Another man's been inside of you. Whose finger is that? We got to wash your pussy.

I'm a dusted for prince.

If I see any prince that don't match mine, you're in big trouble.

If I see yours, I'm going to go, when did this happen?

What are we do we have 8th grade night? Do we have 8th grade date night?

What other stories did you want to tell on this podcast? How long have we been talking for?

I don't know. 37.

Oh, good.

Look at that.

I lost track. I thought we'd been 2 hours doing this. I didn't want to run up the clock.

But you know what's even great, though? At that first moment of breathing for air, you're like, yeah, podcast is done.

Good. Exactly.

We got 30, and I think we got I mean, outside of the why.

Are you trying to get out of continuing to talk to me?

Because I'm going to do it the rest of my life, and we're going.

To go for an hour.

I want it off. We will. Thank you for being the second episode.

Is it done? Oh, thanks for having me. This is nice.

At Natie colon on instagram. Did you look that up at Katie Nolan? Katie B. Nolan on Twitter. Katie Nolan.

What's happening?

I don't know. I'm watching you. Leave me at Katie Nolan on Twitter. Yeah, it's X. X going give it to you.

Look.

X, celebrity Jeopardy.

Oh, yeah.

She's moved on to the semifinals.

Yeah. And I don't know where we are.

When we don't know this, but the semifinals are coming up head on a sweater. How are you feeling? Are you excited for it? Yeah, I'm so excited. Yeah, you smart little bitch.

It was so much fun.

Yeah, dude, it was one of the coolest moments is seeing her on Celebrity. I got to go to one of the tapings. I won't say which one. Is that her doorbell?

No.

Am I crazy?

Yeah. What? I didn't hear a single thing.

You didn't hear a doorbell?

To the point where it feels like you're doing, like, a bit. You're like, oh, is that my phone? I got to go.

No, swear to God, I heard a doorbell.

Do you want me to go check?

Go check. And we're going to keep running.

Okay. I mean, why? It was the doorbell.

I nailed it. I nailed it. I knew it was the doorbell.

Just pull apart the entire shoe rack.

Good job. Yeah, thanks for doing that. And I tried to move it to four. I don't know what happened.

I know. I don't either.

Well, katie Nolan celebrity jeopardy. Contestant, love of my life. Thank you for being on the podcast.

Thank you for having me. Good podcast.

Thanks. Don't forget to myrtle is upset because she wants you to like and subscribe subscribe to the podcast. Right, Myrtle?

Say it.