Hey, girlfriends, it's me, Carol Fisher, back with another season of the global number one podcast, the Girlfriends. Last time, we investigated the murder of Gayle Katz. This time, we're uncovering the identity of the woman who was buried in Gail's grave for a decade before she disappeared. Join me and the rest of the club as we tell her story. Listen to season two of the girlfriends, our lost sister, on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Get emotional with me, Radhi Devlukia in my new podcast, a really good cry. We're gonna be talking with some of my best friends.

I didn't know we were gonna go there.

I'm gonna people that I admire when we say, listen to your body, really tune into what's going on. Authors of books that have changed my life. Now you're talking about sympathy, which is different than empathy, right? Never forget, it's okay to cry as long as you make it a really good one. Listen to a really good cry with Radhi Dvlukia on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Hey, everybody, we are coming to a town ostensibly near you so putatively see us.

That's right. May 29. We'll be in Boston. Really? Medford, Massachusetts. The next night. We're going to go down to Washington, DC, and then scooch back up to New York City at town hall on May 31.

Yeah. And if you're one of those people who likes to plan way far in advance, then you can go ahead and get tickets for our shows in August. We're going to start out where Chuck?

We're going to be in Chicago August 7, Minneapolis August 8, then Indianapolis for the very first time on August 9. And then we're going to wrap it up in Durham, North Carolina, and right here in Atlanta on September 5 and September 7.

Yep. So you can get all the info you need and all the ticket links you need by going to stuffyoushould know.com and hitting that tour button. Or you can also go to Linktree Sysklive. We'll see you guys this year.

Welcome to stuff you should know, a production of iHeartRadio.

Hey, and welcome to the podcast. I'm Josh, and there's Chuck. And Jerry's here, too. And we'd like to welcome you to what will certainly be the greatest episode of stuff you should know ever produced.

Oh, boy. This one. I love it. Let's do it. This one hearkens back to the old days when I feel like we weren't very good at this.

Yeah. Yeah. I had nothing to add because it does. Dude, I can't make heads or tails of this. I'm like, what? What bothers me about this. This episode, this. This topic is it. I even selected it, and it still bothers me. And I. So I started doing, like, a search to try to be like, okay, maybe there is something, like, inherently wrong with lists of dumb criminals. And I looked up. I searched every way I could to try to find even just the dumbest think piece on what's wrong with dumb criminal list. No one in the history of the Internet has apparently ever even had that thought. So I finally just decided to mellow out and go with the flow and just share some dumb criminal stories on for face value, basically.

Yeah, I'm fine with that. I think we both had a tough week, so let's, uh. Let's just make fun of ourselves, okay?

And some criminals.

Hey, you. Hey, dummy.

That's right.

All right, so this is a top ten on the other side. We usually do, like, eight. You actually have eleven.

I know. Well, one of them is zero. I started counting as a mayan would.

No, I was like, what are you doing?

I didn't want to go back and renumber everything else.

That's fine.

So I just added zero. I thought it was rather clever.

All right, let's just breeze through these then, eh?

Oh, yeah. There's notice seven, though.

This is like the blotter episode of stuff you should know.

Yes. So first up on our police blotter, we've got the story of maganga. Maganga out of Omaha, Nebraska. Meganga was a 17 year old boy who, back in 2014, attempted a carjacking which seemed to be a step up from his usual mo, which was to rob stores with a knife. This time, he carjacked a woman in a car with a gun. And he thought, taking your kid to school, right? Yes.

Reprehensible.

Yeah, it was like, 07:00 a.m. I saw something like that. It's a 07:00 a.m.. Carjacking. Either you got up way too early or you never went to bed. 07:00 a.m. Is too early for a carjacking, frankly. But he did, and he was. It started out kind of successfully for him.

Well, yeah, because mom did what mom should do, which is get out of that car, I assume grabbed her son, and dude jumps in and realizes it's a stick shift. A manual transmission could not drive a stick shift. And for, evidently about seven minutes, this nitwit. We can say stuff like that, right?

I think so. I think this kid definitely proved himself a nitwit. A nitwit who had a lot of stick to itiveness. How about that?

Okay. A nitwit with spunk.

Yeah.

About seven minutes of trying to get this car to move. Just moved a few yards, which I imagine was just lurching forward while he's popping that clutch. Finally gives up after just a few minutes of that, and then leaves on foot and is nabbed by the cops.

Yeah, they said some witnesses said that, like, he turned the lights on, he turned the windshield wipers on. Just trying to figure out how to make this thing work. Right. And I saw video of it, and he somehow the car ended up on the sidewalk perpendicular to the street. Oh, well, I have no idea how he got up there.

Progress.

Yeah. So he. He had just gotten out of jail, like, two weeks earlier from his robbery spree. Before that, he'd been caught for. And I could not find out what happened to this kid. Like, I just saw, he was charged, no sentencing. Usually in stories like this, there's more often than not a follow up story, like, two years later about what happened to them when they're finally sentenced or something like that. Couldn't find anything about this kid, but I did find out his name means, in Swahili, it means essentially healer or, like, doctor, like bush doctor, essentially as Meganga. As a last name, it's the 16,301st, most common last name in the world.

Boy, really?

That's what I got.

Really?

That's this kind of episode.

All right, let's move on to number nine with Mister Derek Moseley. This is a Sean Connery kind of crime because that great line from the untouchables, you brought a knife to a gunfight. Derek Moseley brought a baseball bat and a knife to the robbery of a gun store.

Right.

And this was discount gun sales in Washington County, Oregon, near Portland. He is, I guess, smart enough to go in and at least smash a display case and get a gun. But because it's a gun store, I would say 99 out of 100 gun shops, the owner has a gun on their person with actual bullets in it.

Right. That seems to be his failing, that he assumed that the guns were going to be loaded. He didn't account for the people having their own personal loaded guns on them. One was loaded, but that seems to have been, like, the whole reason he attacked the gun store was to get a gun. Yeah, like, that was the purpose. But, yeah, it didn't go very well. The manager pulled his gun and said, get on the ground, and he got on the ground until the police came. That was that. He got five years probation for it and had to pay $350 to fix the display case.

That's right.

Yeah. Wow, we're really cruising through these, aren't we?

We're cruising through. Hey, we get off early today.

Yeah, that's right. Okay, Chuck. Well, let's do number eight, I guess. Number eight A and B, because it's. This is two guys, and I sent you the photo. You saw the photo, right?

I did. That was very kind of you to include that because it really paints a picture.

I would like very much for everybody to look up the photo of Joey Miller and Matthew McNelly and while we talk about them. How about that?

Yeah. And maybe we could throw this on the Instagram page, too. This was from a crime in October 2009, or I guess a sort of a near crime. And these guys put on their hoodies. They went to break into a guy's house in Carroll, Iowa, because one of the guys suspected that his girlfriend was cheating on him, basically, with a guy who lived there.

Right.

But their disguise was their hoodie, sweatshirts, and then what can only be described as a toddler esque scribbling of sharpie on their face.

You totally nailed it. It is like a toddler did it. Like, the lines aren't filled in. It's just terrible.

It doesn't disguise them at all.

No.

And ironically, it's Sharpie or some kind of permanent marker. I don't want to necessarily say that they were using the name brand, but what it ended up doing was, like, it made them obviously prime suspects for the cop who pulled them over.

Yeah, because permanent marker is pretty permanent. I mean, I'm sure they're still not walking around. This is 2009. I'm sure it's washed off by now, but certainly that same night, it hadn't washed off. And so when they were pulled over in their car, which matched the description a witness gave them, they were. They. They matched the description of the assailants who had permanent marker all over their face.

Toddler s scribbles.

Yeah, I saw the cops described as stunned when they pulled the car over.

Yeah. It's so interesting when you read about these things and these decisions, people make an interesting. You know, I'm filling that word in for a lot of terrible things I could say, but it's almost like they were like, hey, let's think of a way that we'll be sure to get caught.

Right.

When they thought it was a disguise.

In fact, I saw a reference in more than one place that they may have been drunk when they did this better. And at the very least, the judge who saw them, I think, like, less than a week later, um, was like, we're. I'm just dismissing these charges because there's no evidence they actually made it into that man's apartment.

Yeah, they didn't break in, they didn't.

Have a weapon on them, and nobody got hurt. So they're like these guys, their mug shot. Staying on the Internet forever is probably punishment enough.

So, yeah, there's no charge for nit wittery.

No. No. So that's Joey Miller and Matthew McNelly. And while you're looking at that, that photo of them, we're gonna go ahead and take an ad break.

All right, we'll be right back with more dent wittery.

Hey, girlfriends, it's me, Carol Fisher. I'm so excited to tell you about the brand new series of the girlfriends. In season one, we told you about the murder of Gayle Katz at the hands of my ex boyfriend Bob. At one point, a woman's torso washed up on Staten island and was misidentified as Gail. She spent nine years in Gail's grave, and then she just disappeared. It's almost like it's become this moral obligation to find her. And that's what we're going to do. Find this missing girlfriend and tell her story with the help of some of your favorite girlfriends from season one, like my producer, Anna.

Oh, my God.

My friend, Doctor Mindy Shapiro.

Hi, it's doctor Shapiro. And I'd like to speak with the.

Deputy medical examiner and of course, Gayle's sister, Elaine Katz.

Having no closure, it kills you.

Join us as we try to solve a 35 year old. It's not going to be easy, but it's going to be one hell of a ride.

What? I can't believe this.

Listen to season two of the girlfriends, our lost sister, on the I Heart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Get emotional with me, Raleigh Devlukia in my new podcast, a really good cry. We're going to talk about and go through all the things that are sometimes difficult to process alone. We're going to go over how to regulate your emotions, diving deep into personal development and just building your mindset to have a happier, healthier life. We're gonna be talking with some of my best friends.

I didn't know we were gonna go there, aren't they?

People that I admire, when we say, listen to your body, really tune into what's going on. Authors of books that have changed my life. Now you're talking about sympathy, which is different than empathy, right. And basically have conversations that can help us get through this crazy thing we call life.

I already believe in myself. I already see myself. And so when people give me an opportunity, I'm just like, oh, great, you see me, too.

We'll cry together and find a way through all of our emotions. Never forget, it's okay to cry as long as you make it a really good one. Listen to a really good cry with Radhi da Vlukia on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Hey, I'm Rachel Martin. You probably know how interview podcasts with famous people usually go, right? There's a host, a guest, and a light Q and a on NPR's new podcast, Wildcard. We have ripped up the typical script. It's part existential deep dive and part game show. I ask actors, artists, and comedians to play a game using a special deck of cards to ask some of life's biggest questions. Listen to NPR's wild card on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your.

Podcasts, learning stuff with Joshua and Charles.

Stuff you should do. So, Chuck, I want to add this one in because I think it's a good example of, like, you should be skeptical even when you're sitting back and enjoying reading lists of dumb criminals. Right.

Okay.

Klaus Schmidt is one you might come across fairly frequently. He was on a lot of lists that I saw. And Klaus Schmidt may not have existed, as far as I can tell. Oh, I did some research. I won't say it's the deepest research has ever been done to try to find somebody, but I did look extensively. Went on to newspapers.com, did a few searches. Nothing.

DNA database.

Nothing came up about this guy. Yeah. I traveled to Berlin and interviewed some potential family members. No one had ever heard of him, but his story is all over the Internet because it's just such a whopper of a story, and it's. I just. I wanted to include it, but I also think it definitely deserves to be pointed out as probably not true apocryphal, as they say in the Bible.

Yeah. Now that you've mentioned this, it very much smacks of a. Of an urban legend.

It does. It does. Because he's described as a man in Berlin who went to rob a bank in August of 1995.

That's right. Well, I want you to tell the story, though.

Why me?

Because you picked this stupid topic.

Okay. So Klaus Schmidt is said to have gone into a bank, pretend like he exists in August of 1995 to rob it with a handgun. And he. Everything's going rather smoothly. Like a bank robbery would be if it's. If it's successful. And apparently, one of the tellers asked him, like, do you need a bag? And Klaus Schmidt supposedly said, you're damn right it's a real gun. I don't know how you would say that in German. Do you?

Uh, no.

And the Tellers apparently were like, oh, obviously, this man is deaf. Not that he misheard. Not that he's super high strung and anxious right now because he's robbing a bank. He's clearly deaf. So we're going to go ahead and press the alarm that everybody else can hear except him.

Right. I think we should write a new version where they're like, do you need a bag? And he says, what has this got to do with Schnitzel?

That's a good. And they're like, oh, he's clearly deaf.

Right? But, yeah, so the alarm he wouldn't have heard is, I guess, if this story is true. So they're like, hey, this guy can't hear anything. Let's just sound this loud alarm.

Yeah, because that's what banks have, are loud alarms that would totally alert any other bank robber. You just have to hope that once in a while, somebody who can't hear comes in and robs the bank. And that's exactly what allegedly happened with Klaus Schmidt. But it gets even better, Chuck, because here's the twist that effectively proves that this is an urban legend.

That's right. Apparently, according to Internet lore, Klaus Schmidt sued the bank for abusing his disability.

Yeah.

Because there's no way this is real.

Essentially tricked him by pressing an alarm that he couldn't hear, which led to him being caught by the police. Yeah, I'm glad we co ed it, but it was kind of fun to pick apart. It's so. It's great because you go on the Internet and you read stuff like this, and if you're not, like, looking out for it, you could just be like, wow, I got to tell you, this story of this Klaus Schmidt. It's amazing. Yeah, they used to call it hey, Martha stories, I think, in the. Either the Inquirer or the World Weekly News.

Oh, really?

Yep. Because you wanted the. Whoever was reading the paper, like, the husband would be like, hey, Martha, get a load of this one.

I like that.

Yeah.

All right, we'll go on to number five here with James Blankenship in Willoughby, Ohio. This is in June 2013. James was trying to rob his own mother's house during the day, and it's very key. It was in broad daylight, apparently got a little rattled and went and hid in a crawl space nearby. The police got there, they caught him, and he. His big sort of problem with getting arrested was, you can't get arrested for burglary during the day.

That's what he thought.

Burglary is a nighttime crime. You cannot take me away.

Yeah, essentially, when the cops grabbed him, they were like, what do you mean, you can't charge me with burglary. It's daytime. And everybody's like, that guy's the dumbest criminal of all time. He thought that you couldn't get arrested for burglary because it was daylight out. And here's the great twist to this, which I found.

This is a good twist.

Apparently, the old common law definition of burglary says that it only occurs during the nighttime. It's breaking and entering in someone else's dwelling at night with an intent to commit a fill in a felony therein, and that if you commit the same act during the daytime, it's a lesser crime of trespass. So it seems that James blankenship, had he been living in the 18th century, would have had quite a case for himself.

I have a question for you. What I meant to look this up, but is burglary specifically when there's somebody there, or does that matter?

Oh, I think it definitely matters. I think if somebody's there, it's considered home invasion. That's like a whole other level. Like, you can, in some states, you can get life in prison or death penalty for a home invasion, depending on what happens and what your intent was.

But burglary means you have to take something. Otherwise it could just be b and e. Right? Because I was just wondering. Because the nighttime thing, I mean, obviously, I knew that wasn't a thing, but whenever I've. I was a kid and I heard cat burglar. You always thought it was something that happened at night while you slept, right?

Absolutely. Yeah. But, of course, a burglary can happen during the day, but it's just the. The legal system in the United States said, we're going to get rid of that distinction between trespass and burglary. And it's all burglary no matter when it happens. Just the mind blowing part is that somewhere along the line, James Blankenship that old common law definition was passed along to him, and he went with it.

Yeah, well, actually, here we go. I looked it up. Burglary. The official definition is entering entry into a building illegally with the intent to commit a crime. Especially theft, but not necessarily theft.

Gotcha. So, especially theft. I wonder what else it could be, too.

Well, I mean, there's all kinds of crimes. You set someone's bathroom on fire. Not metaphorically.

So I guess you would be charged with. You'd be charged with arson and burglary.

Then, in that case, I guess, I don't know, maybe burglary's one of those crimes they can just kind of tack on just because you're in someone's house.

Man, we would make super lawyers, wouldn't we?

I think so.

We just hash it out in open court.

Yeah.

The thing I also love most about James Blankenship's story is that his mother's house was the one he was trying to break into, like you said. I just love that. And apparently, she found him, and he. He went eek and, like, ran off.

Now I'm just picturing us as attorneys. Co attorneys in court. Like, looking up definitions on our phone.

Yeah.

And the judge just being like, do you guys have licenses to practice law?

I know.

No, sir, we don't. But we did a podcast for 16 years where we dabbled in legally. Yeah.

And then I'd pipe up and be like. And we stayed at a Holiday Inn express last night.

I was like, this sounds like something. That's exactly what I was thinking.

I think I would look a lot like Gil from the Simpsons in court as a lawyer.

Who was Gil?

The guy, like, the hard luck guy from Jack Lemon from Glengarry Glen Ross.

Oh, but was that. He was. He was on the Simpsons.

He was a recurring character. Yeah, he was Gil Thunders.

Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah, I see him now.

Gil.

I remember Gil now.

Something like, luck's gotta come for old Gil, right? That would be me in court as your lawyer.

All right, Esquire, should we take a break or keep going? Let's keep going.

Let's do one more, and then we'll take another break.

All right, so let's talk about the story of Darren Kimpton. This fellow was in England in 2013, in Abington, England, specifically.

Yeah.

And this is a pretty interesting one, because not only had Darren Kimpton already broken into a house earlier that day. So this was Darren's second attempt at a break in that same day, but the house that Darren chose to broke into the second time it was that house's second break in of the day, because when Darren showed up to break in, found there was already a window busted out, was like, this is perfect, and went inside. There were police there inside still dealing with the details of the previous break in case earlier that day.

That's Gil. Darren Kimpton is Gil.

Yes.

He apparently said in court that he was trying to steal so that he could buy presents for his elderly parents. Christmas presents. He was apparently also addicted to heroin, and his lawyer described him as clumsy and pathetic.

Yeah. And so, obviously, if this guy's got a serious drug addiction, maybe he was buying stuff for his parents, maybe not. I have a little bit more empathy here and don't want to make too fun of the guy, but he did leave a trail of blood from his first break in leading to the second. So that then connected him to that first crime as well.

Right. So there was just no way that Darren Kimpton was ever going to get away with these crimes, either one of them. He had a bad day, basically.

He broke into a house full of cops.

Yeah, like, you don't do that very often. I've seen other stories, too. I didn't research them, so I'm not sure how true they are of people, like, holding up. There was one where somebody, like, tried to rob a Walmart during the shop with a cop day for, like, the local orphanage or something like that.

Yeah.

And the place was just full of cops. There's plenty of times where it's just been, like, bad timing. Um, or, yeah, you just broke into the wrong place at the wrong time or tried to rob the wrong place at the wrong time. So it's not like Darren Kimpton's alone.

Hunter S. Thompson. Remember when he, uh, with a head full of drugs, stumbled into the police convention?

That's right. And then he stole the briefcase with the drug samples in him.

Yeah, I want to go back and read some of his. I read, you know, uh, fear and loathing, of course. And which other one did I read? Rum diaries. Or maybe it was fear and loathing on the campaign trail, but there were a couple of more that I always meant to get back to, but I kind of went through my hunter S. Thompson phase and quit reading him. But he's such a great writer. I mean, I know everyone always just sort of, if you weren't a reader, actual reader of his, you might think that he was just that crazy guy that did drugs and, you know, made a name doing that, but he was a fantastic writer.

Just absolutely, like, one of the better journalists who ever walked the earth, for sure.

Just amazing stuff.

I think that going back to him might be folly, though. I think maybe. I think he's like Bukowski. Like there is a specific set of years typically in like your early twenties.

You'Re listening to the doors.

Yeah. Where you're reading Hunter Thompson and reading Bukowski and. Yeah. Doing all sorts of other things. And that as you age it that you might find that you don't appreciate him quite as much as you used to.

I have an admission I'll tear it since we're just having fun with this episode. In my twenties, I actually bought one of Jim Morrison's poetry books.

I used to listen to american prayer, like ceaselessly. That was really good.

Yeah.

Did you like american prayer?

It's fine. I mean, I kind of, I can, like, there are some real bangers that the doors did and I can go back and listen to that now and appreciate some of those songs, but it definitely for some reason just feels like a time and place in your life when you thought he was like the most amazing deep soul on planet earth. Right now I'm a little older. I'm like Jim Morrison. Come on.

Yeah, it's weird. For some reason, that same period with Bukowski and Hunter Thompson and Jim Morrison is also like, upon reflection, very cringey. It seems like a lot of times.

Yeah.

Yeah, I'm cringing right now.

Whatever that means these days.

What cringy did you say?

Like me right now?

Yeah, I'm cringing right now just thinking about it.

All right.

But american prayer was good. I'll stand by that.

Was that the. The song, the book? What was that? It was now.

It was essentially like a sonic book of his poetry. Oh, doors, I think, put together after his death, years later. And it was like they played snippets of some of their other songs. It was like stuff mixed in.

Yeah.

And it's like the whole thing from like, start to finish is essentially one long thing. There's obviously, like, discreet, like, red poems that Jim Morrison's reading.

Yeah.

But the whole thing, like, as a single package was really well done, if I remember correctly. I was thinking, don't want to go back and listen to it because I just want to. I just want to keep it as is in my memory.

No, totally. I mean, why ruin that for yourself?

Exactly. That's why I urge you not to go back and read Hunter Thompson.

Okay.

Okay.

He's dead to me.

Well, he really is. Everyone else.

Yeah.

Yeah. You want to take a break now?

Yeah, let's take a break and we'll do our. Or should we? No, let's take a break and we'll do our top three, because they're a little more robust.

Hey, girlfriends, it's me, Carol Fisher. I'm so excited to tell you about the brand new series of the girlfriends. In season one, we told you about the murder of Gayle Katz at the hands of my ex boyfriend, Bob. At one point, a woman's torso washed up on Staten island and was misidentified as Gail. She spent nine years in Gail's grave and then she just disappeared. It's almost like it's become this moral obligation to find her. And that's what we're going to do. Find this missing girlfriend and tell her story with the help of some of your favorite girlfriends from season one, like my producer, Anna.

Oh, my God.

My friend, doctor Mindy Shapiro.

Hi, it's Doctor Shapiro. And I'd like to speak with the.

Deputy medical examiner and of course, Scales sister, Elaine Katz.

Having no closure, it kills you.

Join us as we try to solve a 35 year old cold case. It's not going to be easy, but it's going to be one hell of a ride.

What? I can't believe this.

Listen to season two of the girlfriends, our lost sister, on the I Heart radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Get emotional. With me, Radhi Devlukia, in my new podcast, a really good cry. We're going to talk about and go through all the things that are sometimes difficult to process alone. We're going to go over how to regulate your emotions, diving deep into holistic personal development and just building your mindset to have a happier, healthier life. We're going to be talking with some of my best friends.

I didn't know we were going to go there.

I'm going to go down there. People that I admire, when we say, listen to your body, really tune into what's going on. Authors of books that have changed my life. Now you're talking about sympathy, which is different than empathy, right? And basically have conversations that can help us get through this crazy thing we call life.

I already believe in myself. I already see myself. And so when people give me an opportunity, I'm just like, oh, great, you see me, too.

We'll laugh together, we'll cry together, and find a way through all of our emotions. Never forget, it's okay to cry as long as you make it a really good one. Listen to a really good cry with Radi Dvlukia on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Hey, I'm Rachel Martin. You probably know how interview podcasts with famous people usually go, right? There's a host, a guest, and a light Q and A on NPR's new podcast, Wildcard. We have ripped up the typical script. It's part existential deep dive and part game show. I ask actors, artists, and comedians to play a game using a special deck of cards to ask some of life's biggest questions. Listen to NPR's wildcard on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

Learning stuff with Joshua and chars, stuff you should do.

All right, next up on the list at number three, we have one, Ruben. I'm gonna say zarate.

Yeah, that's how I took it. Or zarate.

Yeah. This is in 2008. He was 18 years old at the time, and he tried to ride to rob a muffler shop.

It's like bribing and robbing at the same time.

Yeah. A muffler shop in Chicago. But here's the hook, is that when he got there, the person working, and this was the manager, Jose sita, s I d a. He said, the cache is here, but the cache is actually in a safe, and only the opener knows the safe code combination. And he's not going to be here for a few hours. And, hey, let's stick it to this guy. You come back, I'll let you know when he's here if you give me your number and you give me a cut of this thing. Brilliant plan to think of on the fly.

It really is. So zarate is like, okay, well, cool. I'm in cahoots with this guy. Here's my number. Call me when the owner comes in, and then I'll come back and rob the muffler shop.

It's amazing.

I'll give you a taste of the money that I take from it. Right?

Uh huh.

So he did. He left, and then Jose Ceda called the the cops and told him what was going on. He waited 25 minutes for some reason, but he did call the cops. And the story starts taking some dark turns around now, because the cops are like, this is great. We're going to use you as bait, as decoy, and you call the guy, but let us get there first and hide in the back in, like, the garage, the workshop of the garage.

He said, it'll be so great. You're going to love it.

Yeah. He's going to be so surprised.

He got, like, an engine block. I can hide behind. Oh, yeah. Okay, perfect.

He's like, I'm going to pretend like I'm changing oil. I've always wanted to do that.

Do you have a jumpsuit for me?

So Ruben zarate, or Jose ceda, calls Ruben zarate. He's like, hey, the owner's here. Come on back and rob the muffler store that I'm the manager of. And so Ruben Zoraide comes back to rob the store, and apparently he said, because he sued the city of Chicago after this, he said that he got to the door and opened it. And before anything, before anyone said anything, the cops just started shooting at him. So he turned and ran. They shot him in the back. It inflicted a life, life threatening injury that apparently only surgery would have. Would have saved his life with. He did have the life saving surgery and then lived to sue the city. I could not find out what happened, but his story was actually backed up by one of the people who worked at the shop, too.

Yeah, basically, they sort of always. They agreed and said that it was like my porky pig moment that the cops didn't even announce themselves that they were cops before they started shooting.

Right. So, yeah, this is a world class Rubens a Rottie story. Everybody that you just heard. Like, this was real research. If you read the Rubens Eradi story, all you hear is about a criminal who was dumb enough to leave his number.

Yeah.

So he could be called to come back and rob the place. And now it makes a little more sense. And you find out that Rubens rider was shot in the back by the cops.

It also featured, for my money, one of your best jokes in a long, long time. That was very under the radar.

Which one?

You said, the cops said, I want to pretend like I'm changing oil. I've always wanted to do that.

I'm glad you liked that.

Oh, that was good.

Oh, man. Okay, so that was number three, and we're going two 10. So this is our top four.

I forgot that was a zero. All right, I'm.

You really are mad about the zero, aren't you?

Well, it's just really threw me.

Hey, man, we've gotten 28 minutes out of this so far. I'm amazed.

All right, let's talk about Albert Bailey. This is in 2010. Bailey. And this had an accomplice, but it was a juvenile, so we don't know the name of the accomplice. Said, all right, let's rob this bank. It's Fairfield, Connecticut. It's a good place to rob a bank and to make this happen. Quicker. What Bailey did was call the bank ahead of time and said, I'm coming to rob this thing, so get all that money together so it doesn't take us very long while we're in there.

Like, this is one of the stories that, no, this is legit. It legitimately happened just like this CT insider, which I'm guessing is short for Connecticut Insider, I think. So they did a story on it after, I think shortly after it, and that's exactly what happened. Like, like Bailey. Albert Bailey called the bank and said, get the money together. He said some other things, too, that made the bank really worry. He's like, we're not afraid to take hostages and turn the place into a bloodbath. So the bank's like, okay, well, we're just going to hang up now and call the cops.

Well, also said, this is key. Don't call the cops because we're going to be monitoring the police scanner.

Yeah. Typically, banks don't listen to you when you call them ahead of time, but also tell them not to call the cops. So they did. They called the cops immediately. And as they were calling the cops, they went to go lock the doors, which is another thing that you would do as a bank. But Albert Bailey was one step ahead of them because his unnamed juvenile accomplice, who turned out to be a 16 year old cousin, was already in the bank and happened to be carrying a briefcase. And when they locked the doors, he said, do you see my little accomplice over there? Give him the money. So it kind of takes a turn. Yeah, this guy's calling the bank ahead of time, but he's thought a little further along than you might give him credit for initially.

Totally. Yeah. When I got to that point in the story, I was like, okay, all right, all right.

I may have misjudged you over Bailey.

Yeah, a little bit. So the cousin's already in there. Cause immediately when the bank was like, well, let's just go lock the door. But, like, that kind of solves the problem right there.

Right. But now they've locked themselves in with the bank robber.

Yeah. Yeah. So the bank robber's in there, which is the 16 year or the accomplish or whatever is in there, I guess. Bank robber.

Sure.

And the teller actually puts money in the briefcase, and the kid left the bank. The 16 year old left with this money, because I guess it just, it still took the cops a little bit of time to get there. Police said that they, when they got there, he was walking out to the car outside to where Bailey was waiting in his car in a nearby apartment or condominium complex. But they really did have a police scanner. They surrendered, but they had walkie talkies. They had a robbery list of things to do.

Right.

And they had a working police scanner tuned into that frequency. So that was not a bluff.

There was something else that stood out to me. The CT insider story says that the 16 year old cousin wordlessly put the briefcase on the teller's counter. I suspect it is weird. I'll bet it was creepy. But I suspect that, I guess Albert Bailey was maybe looking out for his cousin. First of all, he's a juvenile, so he's underage.

So don't say anything.

Yes, don't say, put the money in the bank. Don't say, I'm robbing the bank. Don't say anything. And essentially, as far as a judge is concerned, this kid was basically a tool, an extension of Albert Bailey, who you could argue is being used against his own will. That stood out to be, I'm supposing here. But it seems like that might have been the idea behind his cousin not saying anything in the bank.

I wonder if they said, do you want large bills? And he said, damn right it's a gun.

And they're like, oh, let's press the alarm. They're like, this seems uncannily familiar to a story I've heard around the campfire making s'mores.

So there was one more little point to this one that you found, though, that was pretty good. First of all, Bailey had just gotten out of prison. Seven year stint for robbing another people's bank in Bridgeport, Connecticut. But Bailey said this time, he said, you know, I was kidnapped earlier and some guy kidnapped me and he put a bomb in my pocket and said that he was, unless I robbed this bank for him, he was going to blow me up.

Which sounds very strangely familiar compared to. Remember the Brian Wells story, the pizza man, the pizza delivery man who really did have a collar bomb put around him and forced to rob a bank.

Yeah, the collar bomb heist episode.

Exactly. That happened the same year that Ronald Bailey said it happened to him. 2003. That was not a widely known story, I think, at the time, was it?

It sort of was. I mean, I don't know if it was national. Where was that? Do you remember?

Erie, Pennsylvania.

Pennsylvania. Connecticut. Same side of the country.

Yeah, I guess so. People talk between those two states, right?

Sure.

Okay. But I just thought that was very odd. Same year. So I guess he was either inspired by the story or it's just coincidence. He came up with the same idea.

Yeah, that, man. That was a good one.

It was. Poor Brian Wells, man. Good Lord. Like, the whole thing, that whole. If I remember correctly, that whole story, the way it's going, it's just so mad cap and nuts that there's no way he's actually gonna die. And then he dies.

Yeah.

It's just so sad. He's just such a hapless dude that just. That that happened to another gill. He is very much so. And then, um. Do you. Did you see. I think it was called mastermind, the Netflix special on the. The woman who. Who devised that plan.

Yeah, I saw back then, I think.

Yeah.

When we recorded it.

That was good.

It was good.

And while we're talking about it, I just want to shout out. I don't remember the director's name well enough to try to pronounce it, but the guy who directed the lobster.

Oh, yeah, sure.

I finally saw the lobster, Chuck, and I asked you about it, and you're like, yeah, like eight years ago. But you did agree it's a good movie, right?

Yeah. It's Yorgis Lanthimos, I think.

I think so, yes. That sounds right.

He's great.

Yeah, he is. And the thing that turned me on to him was I just took a chance and watched the killing of a sacred deer boy. And it is disturbing. Really good. It's. It's definitely different than the lobster, but it's. Colin Farrell is just perfect as this just dead, pan, bone dry character that he plays in both of those.

Yeah, he's great. He also did the favorite in the Academy award winning poor things from last year.

Oh, I didn't see that. I didn't know about that.

Oh, hang onto your hats and watch poor things.

Okay, great. Yeah, I want everything that guy's doing.

Yeah. I won't even tell you anything about it, but you should also go back and watch his early foreign language film, Dogtooth.

Okay. I started alps, which is another one.

I have not seen alps, but from his early work, the only one I've seen is Dogtooth, which was also disturbing. And he's great. He's one of the sort of brilliant directors working today, I think.

I think brilliant is an excellent word to describe him.

And you were kind of bagging on Colin Farrell. Colin Farrell. A little bit. And I think he's. He's great. You need to see some more of his good stuff.

What's his good stuff?

Well, did you see in Bruges or.

I couldn't make it through in Bruges.

Oh, wow.

Yeah.

Well, then you probably didn't watch the. The recent one, the. With Brendan Gleeson. The same one. The same guy. He was in Bruges with the banshees of Inishearn.

No, but I saw that served up to me on whatever streaming service I was watching it on.

No, I mean, I think it's great. And it's actually got Barry. I don't know how you pronounce name. Keegan, I guess, or Kogan.

That kid is good. He's in killing of a sacred deer.

Yeah. Yeah. So you'd probably. You'd probably like this, I think.

Okay. All right, well, I'll give it a shot.

Very quirky irish movie.

Yeah. And then I also went back and watched Black Swan again last night, and. Oh, boy, that is such a good movie. It's crazy.

I saw that in the theater, and.

I haven't seen it since I saw it because, um. You mean, I went to go see Swan Lake at Kennedy center in D Street. It was amazing. We stayed at the Watergate and then walked over to the Kennedy center and watched Swan Lake. It was. I was like, this is probably the most cultured thing I've ever done in my entire life.

It was great. Well, also, staying at the Watergate and going to see Swan Lake, that was a very seventies esque experience.

Super, for sure. But, like, having seen it now and then watching Black Swan, it just makes you appreciate it that much more. It's a good movie.

All right, here's what I say we do. I'm gonna have a quick recommendation of something I've been watching.

Okay.

And I say that in that time, you pick one of these two to do.

Oh, it's like picking between my two children.

Do we have to do them both?

No, we can just do one. I already know. I already know which child I'm going with.

I know. But before we get to that, since this is just a sort of a freewheeling episode, I'm going to recommend the great, great show Ripley.

Oh, really?

That is on Netflix right now.

The Tom Ripley stuff?

Yeah. It's the talented Mister Ripley, the Tom Ripley story. But it is told over eight episodes. It is in the most gorgeous black and white that I may have ever seen. And I want to shout out the DP, the cinematographer, Brendan Gleeson. That's very funny, but no, it was the legendary cinematographer Robert Ellswit, who, besides shooting all of PT Anderson's movies, he shot another 40 other major movies you've heard of. He did the great black and white work in good night and good luck.

Yeah, that was good black and white stuff.

And it's just stunning photography. And the guy who plays Ripley, what's his name? He was in. He was in fleabag. What's his name? Emily has a real crush on him.

Brendan Gleeson.

No, it's a good one, though. Andrew Scott. Andrew Scott's in it and Dakota Fanning is in it. And it's just really, really, really well done. And I think fans of the book, or maybe more than one book. Is it more than one book?

Yeah, it's a series.

Yeah. I think fans of the book series are. I think it's a lot more true to that. So they seem to be pretty. I'm happy about it. But the other guy that's in it is Sting's son. Jeff Elliot. No, Elliott Sumner. Sting, son. This guy, he plays Freddy. And I was like, who is this guy? Where have I seen him? I was like, oh, it's young Sting, basically.

Oh, cool. They're good, huh? Yeah, nice.

Pretty good. And looks like young Sting.

Okay, well, I will check it out. I do have a question, though. Did you watch all eight episodes yet?

No, I'm on. I think we finished six last night, so I got a couple of more.

So that's my problem with limited series, is they start out like gangbusters, basically, and then they just peter out, like at episode four, five, six sometimes. And almost all of them do. They're so rare that they make it through all eight episodes or ten episodes or whatever, where you're not like, yep. Didn't need two of those episodes easily.

This doesn't feel padded to me. It's really, really good so far, and I don't think it'll peter out because it's just getting sort of climaxy in the here toward the end.

I have to say, chuck, it just struck me as ridiculously audacious for me to be complaining about people padding their series in the middle of this episode. That's pretty, pretty rich.

All right, so we'll finish up, but also should recommend Fallout, the tv show about the video game. Fallout, one of the few video games I played on Amazon prime with the great, great, great Walton Goggins. One of my favorites.

Yeah, you snuck one more in, huh? Well, that means we're doing the last two of these.

No, no, don't punish me. Let's talk about Dennis Hawkins. Hey.

Nope.

Oh, you want to do the last guy?

Yeah. You didn't like the last guy?

Okay. I thought you were going to go with Dennis Hawkins.

No, I thought the last guy was. Had a great twist to it, but.

All right, let's. Let's do it. James Washington. Everyone can look up Dennis Hawkins if they want to know about him.

Yeah, there you go. Great idea. Look up Dennis Hawkins, and you'll pretty much get the whole thing just from looking at a picture of him.

All right, hit me.

So James Washington is this guy who was doing 1515 in the clink in Nashville back in 2009. I don't know how far he was into his 15 year sentence, but he was definitely in there for attempted murder. And he was pretty young, age 47, when he suffered a heart attack in prison and was taken to the hospital. And he was like, I don't think I'm going to make it. And I guess his conscience was bothering him because he had to get something off of his chest. He decided, that's right.

As happens sometimes you hear about this in prison. When someone is dying or something, in jail or in prison, they will admit to other crimes. And that's exactly what happened in this case. When he told the prison guard, hey, come over here. And the guy came over there, and he was like, I actually murdered Joyce Goodner back in 1995. I'm dying, and I just had to get this off my chest.

Yeah. He said, I killed somebody. I beat her to death. The guard said, that was James Tomlinson, who was the guard. He just happened to be the closest person, and that would have probably been that had James Washington died. But he actually took a turn for the better and recovered. And when it became clear to him that he wasn't going to die, he said, you remember that thing that I confessed to you? I want to go ahead and recant that.

Yeah. And they said, no. Takes these backsies. No, we suspected you to begin with. Apparently, this was in Nashville, and they knew that he had met, uh, with goodner on the day of her murder. He was a person of interest in the case, but they just didn't have enough to press charges against. And it was an unsolved case, but he confessed, and they said, all right, I'm glad you're feeling better. Uh, let's just add a life sentence to your already long sentence.

Yeah. So he got convicted of it, um, for his own confession that he couldn't. Couldn't take back, and he didn't die. So, yeah, it was pretty ironic. He didn't die, so he got life in prison.

That's right.

You got anything else want to do? Three or four more of these?

You know what was funny is when we were about a third of the way through, and it was not much was happening. I was like, oh, you know what we'll do? Maybe at the end we'll just do some recommendations. Like so many podcasts do that, like what they've been reading or watching.

Oh, yeah.

I said, maybe we'll just throw that in there for fun. And then we ended up organically doing it kind of in the last third.

Yeah. If you introduce the thought of doing recommendations in the first act, you have to shoot it off in the third. That's what they said.

Well done.

Thanks. Well, Chuck said, well done, everybody. And that means I want to finish on a high note, which means it's time for listener mail.

All right, I'm going to call this, I don't know, this is just sort of a funny email from one of our listeners.

All right.

About the white dog poop. Hey, guys, my son is a regular listener. He tells me about your podcast he thinks I would like. And what guy do you know that doesn't like to joke about poop?

Not many.

Not many. I never thought about the change in the color of dog poop and the hardness until you pointed it out. But I do remember when I was in the fifth grade in 1955, this is one of our, you know, elder states persons getting in a white dog breeding fight with one of our neighbors, Jerry. He had a big black dog, and his next door neighbors had a big boxer. So there were massive amounts of white dog poop in both yards. I had an advantage because I wasn't wearing, oh, because I was wearing gloves and Jerry wasn't. The dog poop we were throwing was white and hard. I don't remember who won. It stopped when we ran out of white poop. The fight probably resulted in a tie. Laughing, crying emoji. And that is from Dear listener Alan White. And Alan, this just struck me as very cute and funny and kind of perfect for this episode.

That is a great, great, great email. Thank you very much. Who was it?

That was Alan.

Alan. That's a great one, Alan. That's the great thing about growing up at that age.

That's right.

You used to be able to throw poop at one another. And some, some kids wouldn't even wear gloves when they did it. Like, that was, it was just that kind of loosey goosey time, you know?

Yeah. Not like these cuddled kid these days with their poop gloves.

No, they wear two pairs of gloves when they throw poop. Well, thanks a lot. If you want to be like Alan and reminisce, with us. We love that kind of stuff. You can do it via email to stuffpodcastheartradio.com.

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