Oh, and remember, next Friday is hawaiian shirt day. So, you know, if you want to go ahead and wear a hawaiian shirt and jeans. On this episode of the commercial break, I don't think any doctor diagnoses this. I think people self diagnose. They do it by looking at the same website. I'm looking. I got a fear of the figure eight. I got a fear of touch. Hey, hon, I just learned that I have bagophobia, which is the fear of my wife. So if you don't mind, I'm going to go to the shoe show. The next episode of the commercial break starts of kittens. Welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is the temporary Tata Tatina co host. Betsy, you Tina.

Betsy, you, Brian.

And best to you out there in the podcast universe. How are you doing?

I'm doing great.

Yeah, you look great.

Hey, thanks.

Yeah, I like that blue color on you. Looks good. And the glasses. That's a whole thing you got going on there. Librarian, MilF or something like that.

You got to stay age appropriate.

It's certainly age appropriate. Yes. I learned that recently, but we'll move on from that. Do you have a phobia? Do you have phobias? Do you have things that you fear?

Deep water.

Deep water.

Deep water.

Like ocean.

Yeah.

You don't want to be there.

No.

So cruise not good for you?

I've been on them, if I can, sea, land, I'm a lot happier.

Okay, so when you're on a cruise, are you okay to sleep at night? You feel like everything's okay?

Yeah.

Is it just like the.

If I'm with someone I trust?

Yeah. Is it like being on a dinghy in the open water? Kind of. No way. Or thinking about.

I would have a panic attack and die before we even made it out far enough for me to not be able to know.

Up until recently, I hadn't done a lot of open water ocean swimming, but over the last five or six years, since we've been overseas, a number of times near the Mediterranean and Spain and other places, I found that we would go on a boat ride or whatever, and the captain inevitably stops in some beautiful location. But it's open water. I mean, it's like you're out in really deep water. I don't know how deep, but it's very deep. Yeah, it's deeper than I can see the bottom.

They'll put you in a boat to take you to land deep.

Yeah. Yes, that's exactly right. They put you in a boat, they drive around, then they stop at some cove, but the COVID in and of itself is deep water. The waves are rolling and rocking, and I don't love that sensation of swimming out in the open water, but I don't have a fear of it. I would rather be in the lake or a pool, but it doesn't paralyze me. Would you be paralyzed by that kind of activity?

I've done that, like the catamarans and the Bahamas and stuff like that. That's okay. If I can see land, I'm okay. It's when it's, like, so deep, the water is black and there's no land in sight in every direction, I feel very insecure.

I think I'm with you on that. I don't mind cruises because the cruise ships are so big. I know that there's always a chance something's going to happen, and you hear all the horror stories, but the truth is, the cruise ships these days, they're so big, I think it's unlikely they would just capsize really quickly and I would be fallen to my death. Right, but who is that fucking moron who took the people out to the Titanic on that little fucking tin can he had? You remember that guy?

Yeah.

No, I don't even remember the name.

I don't remember his name.

Titan. The Titan submarine. That, to me, is nightmare fuel.

Absolutely nightmare, 100%.

Why in the world?

I'd rather go to space.

I don't like the thought of going to space either, but I would rather go to space. I would rather go to space because at least then I know that the death would be rather instant.

Not drowning.

Yeah, it's not drowning. It is running out of oxygen.

That's fine, but I'll fall asleep.

Yeah. My brain would just go to sleep. No sharks, no creaking noises, no giant hours of understanding that my death is probably really close, and some idiot now is trying that I just paid $500,000 to it, trying to convince me everything is okay.

We're clearly at stone so fast. No opportunity to even be afraid of it in space.

Now you just implode, don't you? Or something along those lines. I don't think you actually implode. I think it's just like. It just sucks all the oxygen out of you. I think it's sleepy time, actually.

Night night.

But one of those guys went down there and they two days where they were looking for them, and they could be down there and they're going to run. They had the timers on the news stations, like the running out of oxygen.

Soon.

I couldn't catch my breath. Sometimes I was like, oh, God, just the thought. I mean, I don't care how rich they are, just the thought that they would die like that.

Yeah.

So I'm watching this television show the other day, and some person on the television show can't even remember who, says that they had a fear of birds pecking their head open and eating their brains.

Where did you even come up with this idea?

I don't know. Yeah, birds. The movie, the old hitchcock.

I don't like the meat eating birds. I love songbirds. I'm a songbird person. Yeah. No owls, no eagles, no falcons.

One of my kids has, like, a real fear of owls and I think they're so cute. She does not agree.

I don't want it coming near me.

Yeah, we were, like, walking outside the other day to the car. She's like, daddy, an owl. And I'm like, no, babe, there's no owls around here. And she's like, owl, daddy, owl, please help. But she was, like, trying to get in my arm, like, oh, hunt. It's okay, it's okay. There's no owls.

Yeah, they're not going to peck you to death. They're going to eat you.

They're going right for your eyes.

Just the idea that something with no teeth can eat meat freaks me out. Yeah.

Kind of the grabbings. I get it. When I was probably in 6th grade, I was ran off with, there's a girl in school and her mom was like the assistant principal or something, and we ran off to go kiss 6th graders. Stupid. Yeah. It was after school, we ran off and there was like a stream, like little woods in a stream down by the school. So we ran down to the stream. Dusk, sun's going down, probably winter months, I would imagine. And all of a sudden, out of nowhere, an owl came swooping down and grabbed her hair. And I screamed like a little chicken. I mean, I was like a little weasel running out of there. I mean, I grabbed her, I was like, let's go.

They're terrifying, I think. I mean, I watched one land. It landed on my neighbor's deck. And when it hit the deck, it was so big, it, like, shook the rail. And I just went inside. I'm like, no, I don't need to be this close to you.

We have these family of red hawks that live behind the house.

Love walks.

They're so beautiful. And they've got wingspans, they're like 10ft long.

You can feel them, it's intimidating. Yeah.

And so I'm always hoping that blue will accidentally be scooped up by one. Blue doesn't know how to go outside. Yeah. I've been sending her up, hoping that family of redhawks. But I've seen those redhawks take away squirrels. Like, baby squirrels, chipmunks, all kind of shit. Like, they've just grabbed them out of the yard.

I love seeing them because I hate the rodents. So I like seeing those birds.

So it made me think when they pick up those rodents and the rodents are like, one time I saw it and one of my kids was looking out the window with me and my kid goes, oh, my God. Oh, my gosh, daddy, the squirrel. And I was like, cycle of life, kid.

That's right.

Cycle of life. You just got to.

We got too many of those.

Anyway, so then he goes, what is the bird going to do with him? And I said, oh, I think they're just going to take it to the nest and play. Like, I couldn't bring myself to tell him, yeah, that's lunch. That's dinner time. It's dinner time for the bird. So I thought I'd go through a list of some of these phobias, like the 50 most common phobias. Not going to go through all of them. We'll just pick and choose what we want. Because I think there are a lot of people out there. I don't think I have an irrational fear. Like, I don't think I fear something irrationally. Heights is my.

I call it a healthy respect for heights, a healthy respect for the sea and tight places. I don't like cavern. That's belunking. The movie descent. It took me three sittings just to get through it because I can't watch people getting stuck in tight places. I physically react to that. Yeah.

Because I'm a glutton for punishment. I'm not claustrophobic, but I would never go spelunking. I would never go. Even crazier are the cave divers, the guys and girls who go exploring unexplored areas of this earth that are not only deep, small and dark, but then.

Have water in them if it's not on my ways. GPS.

Yeah, I'm with you. I don't need to be under the ground. I figure I'll be there soon, so I don't need to be under there prematurely.

No. Yeah. My boyfriend's grandson was watching a youtuber who buried himself alive for seven days.

No.

And I'm like, why? He was raising money to go put wells in Africa. So kudos to, again, if I can't if I can't open the door or the window or I'm not into.

There's that. I can't remember the name of the show. The saint or something like that. The sinner. I think maybe it's called the sinner. Do you remember the sinner?

I did. Bill Pullman.

Bill Pullman. Where he buried himself alive. That, like, third season, where there was a kind of ritual where he buried himself.

So hard to watch.

I've done a lot of weird. Yeah. I've done ayahuasca, tantric yoga ceremonies, man. Moon cycles. I've done a lot of stuff. Do not put me underground. No, but I've heard about this. I've been in an isolation tank, and I would love to go do it again. And I'd love to go do it where I could actually record it with the commercial break. The isolation tanks are enough for me. That will drive you insane.

Yeah. I don't know if I can mentally handle it.

You can, but you got to dig deep.

Deep meditative state. Lots of gummies.

We were talking to Reggie Watson. He was telling us about his experiences with ketamine, and I kind of liken the isolation tank to a do I totally get. There is a certain moment when all of the panic and fear, your brain just doesn't take it. You literally disassociate. And it's, like, right there that the rubber meets the road. Then you understand why people do this for spiritual experiences, because you're having one, but it's pure panic induced. And if you go into one of those floating ones, forget about it. Now you're just like. You can't even feel your body. It's a totally weird sensation. And I would love to do it and then record it, but then am I going to be the weird guy who's bringing a bunch of recording equipment? You know what?

You understand this is an isolation.

Yeah, I don't know. I'm not going to say anything, like, purely negative about this, but I will say it's kind of defeats the purpose. Talking about. Chrissy and I were talking about how I saw someone film for Instagram, an ayahuasca ceremony with a bunch of people sitting in a circle drinking ayahuasca. And I was like, why are you posting this on instagram? This should be something that is sacred, deeply personal. Deeply personal. And even though it was one person filming everybody else, if I was in that group, I'd be like, dude, don't put this on. Don't fucking film this. I don't want this film. This is not going to be the prettiest time of my life. Yeah. Blur my face. Blur me throwing up. Blur me screaming about my mother and how she abandoned me. Yeah. Please. And if you don't mind, also delete the million deaths I'm about to experience. Thank you very much. So let's explore some of the irrational fears, rational or irrational, that people may have. I don't even know how to say this phobia. I don't even know how to say. It's got so many letters in it. Fear of peanut butter.

What?

That is an irrational fear.

That's irrational.

Unless you are allergic to peanut butter.

But maybe that's what it is. Maybe they're so. Maybe they know their body is reacting with a fear state.

Yes. To keep you away from that I can understand. But that is not an irrational fear. That is a perfectly rational fear.

Medical. Yeah.

If something can. I have a fear.

Kill you.

Yeah, I have a fear of it. Of people putting a gun to my head. That is a rational fear.

That's right.

Right. Arithmetophobia, which is the fear of numbers. How do you even get around life?

I don't know.

Fear of numbers.

And why would you be afraid of numbers?

I have no idea.

I love numbers.

Astrophobia, which is the fear of thunder and lightning.

Oh, I love it.

Yeah, I guess you could be scared of lightning. That's a thing that could kill you.

It could, but it's so beautiful.

Oh, I love a good rainy night.

Me too.

I love a good rainy.

We had some great storms the other night.

Yeah, I like it.

I'm a brontophiliac. A brontophiliac turned on by thunder and lightning.

Oh, you are? Yeah. Okay. I think I might be a brontophiliac, too. Something about, didn't they say, like, the negative ions, when the low pressure system and the high pressure system, the negative ions that are created, whatever, that actually has a physiological.

Some people do, yeah.

Something about it that kind of makes us feel happy. I love it, too, man. The only complaint I have about Georgia storms, they don't last very long.

They don't.

They just breeze by in ten minutes, 15 minutes, and then you're done with it. I want a good sustained thundery lightning. 30 minutes. I want it to be like 3 hours long. I like that kind of thing. In Chicago, we used to have thunderstorms that would last for days. It felt like maybe I was just a kid and it just was going by much slower back then. Astrophobia, which is a fear of space. I would say that I have a healthy respect for space. I don't think I need to be there if you're not meant to live there. I don't think I need to be.

I love it. I love watching.

Me, too.

The night sky is one of my favorites planetariums. I can't wait to live in Space City.

Space city. Oh, yeah, that's right. You're going to live in Huntsville. Space City. That's right. It is. Let's see. Autonomphobia. Autonomphobia, which is the fear of human like figures. So not actual humans, but let's say you go to Disney world and you see those Animatronics.

Yeah, those are kind of creepy. I wouldn't say I'm afraid of them, but I don't like them. But I don't like any. Yeah, I get.

Don't think. I don't think of you as like a theme park. No type of girl.

It's not my thing.

Yeah, like six flags. Cool.

Maybe.

Maybe. You like roller coasters.

I used to. And then I had children and I got afraid of dying on them.

Oh, you did?

Because I had a couple malfunction when I was a kid, at which point you think you're invincible and you don't care, but then I had children and. Yeah, I can't do it anymore. The thrill seeking kind of, you know.

Astrid, you still really love roller coasters. And then we went to Europa park, which is like a cheap knockoff of Disney, but done really, really well.

I hear it's great.

It was super fantastic. It's in the middle of nowhere Germany. Middle of nowhere Germany. And we went there and we spent two days there. Freezing cold outside. It was like in January. Freezing cold. But all the roller coasters were open. Everything was open. They were just, hey, it's this Germany. It's cold sometimes. We're going to keep it open. And it is a Disney world like place. They have parks and hotels that are attached, and it's a whole themed land. But then they have. What was it like, ryan the rat instead of Mickey Mouse? It's like everything. Yeah. It's literally coffee, but it's good. So we go there and assert. And I had enjoyed roller coasters up until this point in our relationship. And then one night, we went on a roller coaster, and Astrid got off, and she did not feel well. She felt physically sick. And ever since then, it's hard for her to get on another roller coaster.

Yeah.

She's like, I just don't want to be sick.

I've gotten so far as sitting in them and they're strapping me in, and then I make everybody stop so they can let me off because I'm like, going to have a panic attack. Oh, I rode the screen machine in high school and my seatbelt thing. Yeah, that bar.

Oh, the bar that comes down came.

Up and it was during a backwards run. Remember when they used to do that? They'd run it back?

Yes, I do.

And mine came up and I thought that was it. I was going to die. I've had things.

So what did you do, just pull it back down?

Well, I just held and I started screaming and my. When we came back through, they stopped it and got us all off and then shut it down. But, yeah, I was terrified. Yeah, I was okay.

Yeah.

Then after I had kids, we got on the screen machine. Gavin's like four or five years old. I was like, you have to let us off. My poor kid starts crying because he wants to ride the thing.

Of course he does.

And I had to wait for his dad to come back and get him and take him because he was riding with heaven. So, yeah, I can't do it. I just can't.

You just got this super panicky feeling that you. Something bad was going to go, was.

Going to happen, and I couldn't be on that thing, not certainly with my son next to me. Yeah, that's it. No more of that.

I do have a little bit of a fear about my kids riding roller coasters for the first time because it is nerve wracking. It is nerve wracking, I think, because as a parent, I don't want to see my child suffer unnecessarily. Like, what if they really don't like it? We've taken them on small rides and they liked it, but they were fearful at first, then they liked it by the end. But now I don't want to see them suffer unnecessarily. I think I can pick out a couple of the kids who will be okay and a couple of the kids who are probably not going to like the experience. But then I also have this, like, I guess I do have a little bit of an irrational fear that something's going to go wrong and a kid's going to go flying out of the fucking.

Yeah.

Roller coaster.

I don't want to lose my child and I don't want my child to lose me, so we just don't do it together.

Botanophobia, which is the fear of plants. Botanophobia. Yeah, the fear of plants. Yeah. They're everywhere. How do you even function if you have an irrational. I mean, I say irrational.

You need the oxygen they put out. Come on.

Yeah. And I don't think that's a rational fear. Like, most plants aren't going to harm you. Do yourself a favor. Do not put them in your mouth.

Yeah, that's right. Only from the grocery store.

But I told my kids, I said, plants, all these things are pretty to look at. Don't put them in your mouth, because who fucking knows, right? Cacophobia, which is the fear of ugliness. Well, you're not allowed. You're not allowed here at the commercial break. Probably not listening.

We're on radio.

Catarophobia, which is the fear of mirrors. Mirrors.

Is that the fear of the mirror or the reflection?

Doesn't say. Well, let me click through here. They're calling it spectrophobia. Why did the other one call it catarophobia? Okay. Spectrophobia, a type of anxiety disorder classified as a specific phobia, is the fear of mirrors or the fear of what may be reflected in them. It may also be referred to as.

Like, bloody Mary's going to show up in their.

Okay, that I get. Yeah, but that's just kids being dumb.

Yeah. It's more of a fear of apparitions than the mirror itself. Right.

Cowlophobia, which is fear of clowns. I fucking do not like clowns.

Hate, yes. I wouldn't say fear, but I do not like them. I don't want them coming near me. I don't hang out where they hang out. It's a no for me.

I just don't understand it.

It's the makeup and the masking. I'm just against it.

But, yeah, I don't have a fear of them. I don't like them.

Not at all.

My question is, what is the fucking point? What is the point of a clown?

They say it's to entertain and to make.

I've never been entertained by a clown, except for Bozo the clown.

Okay. I did like baskets.

Okay? Baskets was really funny, but that's a different story altogether.

You are not a clue.

Chronophobia. Chronophobia, which is the fear of time. How do you survive if you have a fear of time? How do you even do that?

How do you even identify that you have that fear?

By looking at the clock, I suppose. But there's a fear of clocks also, which is chronomentophobia. These words are really hard to say. And why do they make chronomentrophobia chronomentrophobia is the fear of clocks. Now is something. Are you born like this? I'm wondering?

Yeah.

Do you develop this over time, or are you born with this? Do you develop this over the time you're afraid of? I'm just curious. Let's see. Doma to phobia, which is fear of houses. God bless you, child. Do you. What?

Do you live in a tent? Yeah.

Well, there's lots of people, apartments or decidophobia, which is exactly what it sounds.

Decision fear.

It's the fear of making decisions. Okay, we'll get back to this. And I have a fear of psychics. That's what I have a fear of. So we're going to review some more. Teresa caputo, she got a brand new show out. I want to talk to you about it. Yes. They just keep this train of fucking going. Why are we paying Teresa caputo to lie to everybody on air? I just don't understand it. I don't get it. Obviously, I have a grievance with Teresa and. Yeah, we'll get into it after these words.

What? Oh, hi, it's Christina again, here to remind you to go to tcbpodcast.com for all things audio video and TC video. Give us a follow on Instagram at the commercial break and on TikTok at TCb podcast. And guess what? We have a new phone number. I know what you're thinking, but I promise this is the last TCb phone number you will ever have to remember. So call us and leave us a voicemail or text us at 212433 TCb. Once more for the people in the back, that's 212433 TCb. Oh, and check out our YouTube channel@YouTube.com, thecommercial break. That's all for now. Let's listen to our sponsors and get back to the show.

All right. Here with tina talking about rational or irrational fears. I just want to do a couple of more because I think this is really interesting guinea phobia, which is the fear of knees. Knees.

Okay.

Now, sometimes I look at my knees and I am fearful, but it's not because I'm fearful of my actual knees. It's that my knees are showing my real age.

Don't you hate that?

Your elbows and your knees. So now I've started moisturizing the shit out of myself. Every night, an Astrid comes in one day and she's like, what the fuck are you doing? And I'm like, I'm moisturizing. And she's like, hon, you don't have to moisturize every bit of your body with four different moisturizers, which is what I was doing. And I'm like, you don't. And she's like, no, just use one. There's one for your body and one for your face. And I'm like, there's one for your face. I didn't know that. I've been using the one on my knees for my face. How am I supposed to know this? No one taught me. Oh, this has got to be a tough one. Hapiphobia. The fear of touch. That's got terrible, terrible. I wonder who suffers with that. I mean, I like being touched. I don't like being overly touched. There's this thing. One of the Venezuelans are very touchy feely kind of people, and I guess I am, too, with people that I know, and I know it's okay to touch. Like put your hand on a knee or on a back while you're talking to them or whatever.

I love to give hugs and stuff like that to some people, not everybody. So don't come up to me in public. I don't want to hear that. I'm not looking to give hugs. Hey, brother. I mean, I guess if someone was like, hey, brother, love the commercial break, I'd be like, okay, like, air hug. Air hug. But if, brother. Live in the commercial break. But the Venezuelans love to touch. And we were on this trip one time around Spain. Astrid's uncle took us on this amazing trip, driving ten days through Spain, staying at castles like old castles have been turned into hotels by the government and this private company. And so it was just like this amazing trip that we went on. But we had to drive in two or three cars because it was like twelve of us. And one of the relatives that I got stuck with was sitting in the middle back seat. I was driving like an suv, and they were sitting in the middle bench. In the middle of the bench. And she kept on pulling my arm, like, mira, mira, mira, mira. Which is like, look, right? Look or see.

And she kept on grabbing my shoulder. And eventually I was just, like, hunched right over the. I just wanted to get away. That's all I wanted to do. I just didn't want to be touched.

Crawling into the windshield.

Yes. You know how people touch you sometimes and then you're like, that part of your body starts to get irritated. It's like you have a negative energy build up and you're like, stop.

Grab it off.

Octophobia, which is a fear of the figure eight octophobia.

How do you even identify that?

I don't know.

My mind is blown.

My mind is blown, too. I mean, listen, I'm not saying that. I mean, this is irrational. Clearly, the figure eight is not going to hurt you in any meaningful way.

Right?

And I'm not diminishing the fact that people probably do have a fear. Some people, some small minority of human beings have a fear of the figure eight. But you're right about this. How do you even determine that the figure eight is bothersome to you?

Yeah, and then what doctor diagnoses it?

I don't think any doctor diagnoses this. I think people self diagnose. They do it by looking at the same website I'm looking at. I got a fear of the figure eight. I got a fear of touch. Hey, hon, I just learned that I have bagophobia, which is the fear of fucking my wife. So if you don't mind, I'm going to go to the shoe alternative, papyrophobia, which is the fear of paper.

That's a terrible fear to have.

That is a terrible fear. Technophobia. The fear of any kind of technology. The solace phobia. The phobia is the fear of the ocean. Thalassophobia.

We have that one.

Yeah, we have that one. Okay.

Now there's a name for it.

Wicophobia, which is the fear of witches or witchcraft.

Okay, well, I mean, I guess I could hurt you.

Yeah, I guess I could. Zuger phobia, which is the fear of vacuum cleaners, which every dog in the world has, by the way. Every dog. So there's also ghostophobia, right? There's people that have a fear of ghosts. I don't know what the official term is. A spirit phobia or whatever. Fear of ghosts. I have the opposite. I'm not afraid of ghosts. I'm afraid of the people who say they could talk to ghosts.

Yes.

And I'm afraid of them because I want to watch. I have caputa phobia. That's what I have. Fucking caputa phobia. This woman is a true whack job, in my opinion. And she's doing a con job on everybody out in the audience. And it just drives me up a wall. And here's why it drives me up a wall. And I've said this so many other times on the show, but I feel like I have to preface it, because I know that we do have fans that listen to the show that also like Teresa caputo. Here's the reason why I don't like Teresa I'm pretty sure of all the vehicles on earth, of all the human beings on earth that the universe could use to channel ghosts, Teresa would be the last person that they would choose number one. But number two, and a very close number two is she's just doing a parlor trick. That's all she's doing is a parlor trick. And she's got the advantages of having technology on her side. And I'm sure somewhere in that large main of hers, there is technology working for her and her parlor tricks.

It's got to be 100%.

Got to be. There's got to be something in that hair that is like some kind of, I don't know, like, pressure device that's pushing her head when answers are right or wrong. Or better yet, just an actual earpiece. Look at this earpiece. You couldn't even tell that I was wearing this unless you looked really closely. And Gisha would take a little bit of hair to hide that, and you could have conversation with anybody that was outside of the room simply by just piping it into your ear. Listen, those fucking football players do it. They call those talk to the quarterbacks and those helmets all the time. And I don't see any earpieces now that wearing a helmet. But so is Teresa. Teresa's wearing a helmet also.

Air helmet.

So Teresa's got a new show.

This is outrageous.

This is outrageous. It's a crime against humanity.

I agree.

Teresa's been moving from network to network. I don't follow it that closely, but she's been moving from network to network over the last, say, decade and a half. I think she was on TLC. I think she was on lifetime. I think she was here. I think she was there, all with some iteration of her parlor trick. So now she's got a show where they follow her around when she's doing her tours, which I think is how she makes a majority of her money. I'm sure the tv deal is lucrative also, but I don't think it's that lucrative. Maybe they pay her $25,000 an episode, $30,000 an episode. It's the tour. It's the people who. To come to see her live, where she actually makes her money, because live events, if you can fill an arena, you're making some money. And I don't know if she can fill an arena, because I think I.

Mentioned to you, it's like half full.

It's like half saw. I had always said to Tina, we have to find a way to get into one of these events. But that will never happen.

I might be.

Not anymore. Not anymore.

Probably not.

Because clearly Teresa's team is going to do their homework, and they are not going to let someone troll Teresa in her live events. You have to put your name, your phone number, and your address when you sign up to go to one of these events or Ticketmaster or however they get that information. And I'm sure there is some kind of cross checking system going.

I'm sure they.

I'm sure of it. Right. And at the very least, a cross checking system for the people who are going to be sitting close enough to talk to Teresa. So the other thing is, I know for a fact that they scan for electronic devices. Like, you know, how you go, like, we went and saw Pete Davidson, you had to put the thing in the yonder bag, lock it up. I'm sure they do that with her, too. But somebody out there, some brave soul, some hero that doesn't wear a cape, decided to tape a live Teresa Caputo event. Unauthorized, obviously, from the nosebleed seat. So it's a little hard to hear. It's a little hard to make out some of the stuff she's saying because of the echo in the building. But that place was half full. It wasn't even close.

That makes me feel better about the Humans that I live in this world with.

It also makes me feel better, too, because if you only fill half an arena, you're probably not making much money. Right? I think you really have to fill the thing to make good money. But Teresa makes money doing tours. She tours all over the country. She does it, I think, for a majority of the year. And then she gives side private readings.

You can book a private.

Oh, I'm sure it's like $2,500. How much do you think a Teresa Caputo reading would be? 2500, probably about. For the hour, I would think. Or for half an hour. Hour. Yeah, it's probably got to be that. She's a big tv star. She's all over the world. She's well known. Okay, so this show is an unscripted, unedited look at my life on tour, whatever. So now she just shows up to random places and then reads people. So I thought we should take a look at this video. We should, because clearly there is a lot of horse shit and shenanigans going on here. And what better place to talk about horseshit and shenanigans than the horseshit we're built on?

Horseshit and shenanigans.

And listen, I bullshit a lot, but at least I'm clear about it. I'm clear headed about it. You know it. And I tell you.

Transparent.

It's transparent if you believe anything I say. Check your head. Talk to your therapist. All right, so, without further ado, I was trolling on the Internet, as you do.

Oh, man.

Do I like to do this. And let's take a listen. Oh, my God. Look at that mane of hair. Look at that. She has gone to new heights on that hair.

That is epic.

How long do you think it takes her to do that hair?

That shit is standing up six inches off the top of her head.

Maybe eight.

Maybe eight.

Maybe eight.

That makes the. They should be ashamed of themselves.

But, you know, this is coming in.

This is the flock of seagulls.

Feather, do you know this is coming back?

This is horrific.

Flock of. Teresa.

They're like, no, we need to go bigger, Teresa. We're going to put the nodes here.

We're going to put the nodes here, the earpieces here, and we've got a message board in the back of your head. She's going to be the first one to get Nerolink from that fucking musk. She's going to be like, I want them to be able to wire it right into my brain. How does she get her hair like this? Because not only is it eight inches tall off her head, it's, like, all the way around.

I don't know who okayed this.

Is this a wig? I mean, clearly, I think it's attached to her head.

See it coming out of her head? But I don't trust her anyway. I certainly don't trust her hair.

No. There's got to be some magic going on there, for sure.

It's witchcraft.

I want to know what it looks like from the back. Is it, like, all flat? Because they pooped everything out?

Yeah, the ghosts are like, make it bigger so we can see you.

Make it bigger so we can smack you on the back of the head. All right, here we go. Let's take a listen to Teresa's brand new show on whichever channel.

When I'm touring and I have a day off, I always love to see what is unique to that town.

Oh, I'm sure, Teresa, you're a man of the people.

I mean, it's a lot of fun to visit hidden treasures with Keanu. Apparently, hillbilly hot dogs was, like, the place to go.

Oh, good old hillbilly hot dog.

Are they going to tell us where they are?

They're in Tennessee. I mean, I don't know this for sure, but I'm just assuming. Hillbilly hot dog with that dolly Parton here? Yeah. Oh, no, they're in Virginia.

Sorry, what?

They are literally pulling up into a shack that's called hillbilly hot dog. And by the way, they're probably fucking good hot dog.

They probably are.

Hillbilly wedding chapel. A wedding chapel where?

What can you imagine for the rest of your life telling your wife, I'm so glad we got married at the hillbilly hot dog wedding chapel? Crowning achievement of my life.

Hi.

Let's go get some hot dogs.

Don't let her in.

He sells best weenies around.

They did just say the best weenies around.

They just said, the best weenies around in a song. When you make up a song, you've probably earned it.

Sometimes something as simple as trying to order food is very difficult because spirit clearly has a very different agenda for me.

Oh, my God.

I can't take it. So this is how our original show started with the Long island medium.

Yeah.

She would just go get her nails done and. Oh, God, there's a spirit.

Oh, really?

And then she'd go order a sandwich and. Oh, God. Did you just. I can't stand.

I'm feeling a buz on my.

Throat. I know.

She's rubbing her throat. Is she going to go through this whole routine where she's choking now and that means somebody died? Because I can't breathe.

All right, I'm going to do the olive cheesy, beefy weenie. Cheesy, hilarious weenie.

It just rolls off the tongue.

It does beefy weenie right off the tongue.

We're doing a whole comedy routine here.

See?

Nothing having to do with the television cameras.

All right.

Jeez. 24 eightyze weenie.

I know to be one big weenie.

She's drinking diet Mountain Dew. You're an adult, Teresa. Stop it. If you're going to drink a mountain Dew, drink a fucking mountain Dew. You know what I'm saying? That's my opinion.

Just go for it.

Anybody out there ever drank Diet Mountain Dew?

I do.

You do?

Yeah.

You drink diet?

I do Mountain Dew.

Sorry to offend. Never mind. I take it back.

No, I'm okay. So I don't know if you know what I do.

Yeah, I don't know if you know what I do or why all these tv cameras are all around us.

It's not about the hot dogs. It's about me.

It's about me. It's always about me. Because if I can deflect it to me, then I don't have to worry about you.

But I'm able to communicate with people that have died. So when I start choking and coughing and I feel a restriction in the throat, it means that someone passed him something of the throat.

I got a punch of jizz in the back of my throat.

Do you understand that?

My mom actually.

Let's suspenders of the background. He's like, oh, my God. Oh, my God. You mind moving it along? I got a half hour for lunch.

I need my cheesy weenie.

Cheesy weenie?

Fire.

Okay. She passed in the fire.

Yeah, she did. I'm very skeptical.

Yeah.

I mean, I'm spiritual, but I'm kind of a skeptic when it comes to mediums and things in that aspect, obviously.

You'Re not, because a lady just walked in with a bunch of tv cameras.

Yeah. They facebooked all of you before they walked in.

How many producers talked to these people before they actually showed up? You don't just randomly show up at these places and start filming.

So when a soul hits me in the back of the head, when they show me, like, how they pass and they make me feel how they pass, hitting me in the back of the head is the validation that she did not suffer to her death.

I didn't see anybody get hit in the back of the head. Your head never moved like that.

And she started rubbing her throat and coughing the minute she walked in there.

Yeah. So here's how it goes. For those of you that don't know, and you should know because we're adults in 2024. Yeah. That's just allergies. Just last night's dinner stuck in your throat. It's Gerd you have. Gerdeck will clear up those ghosts. Zertech not approved for ghosts. Zurtech for mild Gerd and ghosts. Oh, my God. I take ghost tech. So, for those of you that don't know, and you should know because you're an adult in 2024, but when a tv, film, or tv or film crew go to film something like this, they spend probably at least a half a day at this place, making sure they have the right angles that the tv cameras know where to stand.

Also, it's the cutest girls on staff. They've got their hair done. They've got their makeup done. I guarantee these girls don't serve hot dogs looking like that on a regular Tuesday.

No, probably not. I mean, maybe they do, but probably not. They knew exactly when she was coming in. They probably had a production crew there since the early morning. Teresa rolls up at noon to get her lunch or whatever, they have to sign releases so that they can use the material. And while some of those releases admittedly can be signed afterwards, 99% of the time, they're signed beforehand so that the tv crew or the editing crew can use whatever is made inside of that to their advantage. They don't do that afterwards because someone might go, I didn't like what I said there, so can we take that part out? They start negotiating, editing. So the second that you sign one of those contracts, how easy is it to just find out that information, pass it along to Theresa?

You have their name, you have their.

Address, their phone number, their Facebook, their instagram. You're doing research, by the way. Even if you weren't a ghost, whatever talker, these are things that producers of television shows would find out anyway.

Wow.

Do you understand that?

Yeah. My mom passed away very unexpectedly three years ago. She died in an apartment fire.

Well, that is terrible. There's no doubt about that is terrible. But Teresa is not talking to her.

Right.

Your mom kind of looked at me and she goes, you know, I was a bit of a free spirit, Teresa. Does that make sense?

Does that make sense when your mom.

Kind of looked at me? What are you talking about?

She kind of looked at me and she. Uh huh.

Yeah. My mom was not strict. She was very lazy.

Yeah, you're right about that. She looked at me. Teresa often says she doesn't see the spirits they touch.

Yeah, they just hit her in the head.

If you can see her, I want to hit. Where is she? Yeah, why can't you give me details?

What does she look like?

Yeah, she's here.

Act kind of. Let me do whatever I wanted to do. She bought me my first beer when I was 15. She had the biggest heart. She was kind to everyone. She was a pretty incredible woman.

She bought me my first beer when I was 15.

Your mom says, I never told you, but how proud I am of you. She says, you've always made me proud. She just said to me, she goes, my daughter is the best mom. She says she's twice the mom that I ever was. That doesn't mean that your mom wasn't a good mom. What she's acknowledging is the mom that you have become.

Oh, now you're interpreting what the ghosts are saying in some kind of psychological, therapeutic way. Got you. Ten four. You're now a ghost therapist. Go home. And by the way, no offense to this young lady, terrible thing happened to her mother. And if someone died that was close to me, I would desperately want to have one more conversation with them. Desperately want to have one more conversation with them. But I don't think you're too skeptical about this because Teresa is giving you zero information that you probably couldn't figure out on Facebook or Instagram.

Yeah, I'd be pissed off if she walked up to me and said, I sure would. I'll talk to my mom on my.

Don't need it. I don't need your bullshit.

Thank you.

So she says, please know that I did not suffer to my death. That is the main reason why she.

Needed to come through.

But more importantly, how much she loves you and how proud she is of you.

Saying things generically that any child would want to hear from their mother or father, one living or not.

100%.

I'm still waiting for my dad to say it, but I don't actually think he's proud of the commercial break.

Wow.

Thank you so much.

Well, don't thank me. Thank them.

I didn't believe in this until this. And you really nailed everything, spot.

You nailed in this two and a half minute conversation.

Exactly.

Come on.

I wish you all the best.

I can't believe it. It's definitely real because somebody off the street that's walking into hibbly hot dogs shouldn't know all that.

No, please, come on. Don't say what the producers. Yeah, don't drink the koolaid. Don't say what the producers told you to say. That's a bunch of bullshit.

Your weenies.

Thank you.

Thank you. We're not even gonna eat the weenies. We're never interested in show. This is just for the show. All right, more Teresa Caputo. We'll be back.

Well, thank the baby Jesus. Brian took a breath. And now I will use this opportunity to let you know that we've got a brand new phone number. That's right, it's 212433 TCB. And you can text us anytime you want. Or you can call and leave us a voicemail and we might just use your message on the show once Brian gets through all the messages he missed last year. Of course. Anyway, you can also find and dm us on Instagram at the commercial break and on TikTok at TCB podcast. And of course, all of our audio and video is easily found on tcbpodcast.com. Now, I'm going to thank g one more time that we have sponsors. So thank g. And here they are.

I love how my producer uses our liners to make fun of me, to slowly poke at her boss. I allow it because I'm a weak need probably agree with her kind of guy. All right, back to Teresa.

That was insane.

Somebody passed from something of a neck or something, and I kept feeling something.

With, oh, now she's in the back of the restaurant doing another reading for another random human being who I guarantee is somehow related to this restaurant.

Let's see my brain.

You know, my husband died, Alzheimer's, and.

He had a lot of heart.

One of the founders of this, he passed away on July 29, 2021. And he had battled.

Oh, he's the owner of the hillbilly hot dog place.

Knew it timers for probably about a year and a half. And he used to look at me and say, I'm not ever going to forget you.

Did he complain about his neck? Because he keeps making me feel the neck, and I can't get rid of the neck pain.

We had that checked so many times, and there was nothing.

Oh, my God. Did you post that on Facebook frequently? Well, yes, I did. How did you know that? Well, I have this little thing I'm seeing when my neck hurts. It means he's on Facebook.

They could find. But because he had heart issues and they were always checking his neck, but he did.

I knew it. I knew it. My neck hurts now. Got my neck. It was upstairs, and I kept feeling the thing.

What?

My neck.

Oh, my God. How fake is this? They're doing, like, these cutaways where she's complaining about her neck frequently throughout the day. Who does? Fucking crock of shit. I can't. I can't even swallow it sometimes. It's so unbelievably and poorly edited. It's just terrible.

Wow.

It was aside.

Wow.

And we had a chat.

Who's the young girl who's with her?

Is that, like, her assistant?

Okay.

Poor girl can't find anything that was wrong.

So when a soul shows me a plaid or a flannel shirt, it means that's what they always wore. Or more importantly, they only wore a specific type of shirt.

Well, he has a red plaid.

She talking about Tina? He's standing there holding up a shirt.

Well, he's dressed in a shirt. Reason number three.

Why tv show anyway?

They give her a tv show because there's so many people out there. And I'm not calling them gullible. I'm saying they desperately want to believe that someone. And maybe it's true. I don't discount that people talk to dead people. I don't discount that at all. I have friends. I've had experiences in my own life that I think are unexplainable strange and connected to some universal energy that I can't explain. I won't even try to explain. But what I don't do is I don't make believe. I'm not playing make believe with other people.

You're not messing people's emotions.

Yeah, this is the worst part of this.

Yeah, it's terribly manipulative.

And, you know, Chrissy pointed this out so many Teresa Caputo episodes ago, and I keep on thinking about this. How do these people then not follow up with Teresa and ask them questions? Why are they not doing. They not allowed to edit them out?

I would have questions.

This drives me crazy.

They probably make him sign it in the waiver that they won't ask too.

Many detailed questions that I have to hang by my front door, because that's.

What he always would walk out.

He'd put that on.

And then you lay on his side.

Of bed, and I lay on his.

Side of the bed. And you feel him. You feel the bed movement.

I do. It's a love story.

It truly is.

And I miss him like crazy. Do you know, I have to tell you that my son in there, Vance, he had a dream that sunny came to him.

Yeah, but this is what your husband also wanted me to say. The dream. It wasn't a dream. It was a. Oh, wait.

After you told me, I figured something out. Yeah.

You just reminded me.

Yes. This is another thing that she does. She'll see a piece of clothing and she'll go, is there a bracelet? Was there a bracelet involved? And the bracelet says, like, R-I-P. Dad, you know what I'm saying? And she's like, I knew it. I knew it.

Is your son in the kitchen?

Yeah, he's in the kitchen.

I got to see your son. I want the guys to sit down.

We're going to bring Vance in here.

Saved by Vance.

So, Vance, are you familiar with. Who am I am. Oh, okay.

Yeah, no, they're not familiar with who you are. He owns the restaurant. How did they get permission to film in the restaurant? From Vance.

I delivered a few messages, and then your dad came through.

Really?

And there was a point where he wanted me to say that the dream. It wasn't a dream. It was a visitation. It was your dad's soul coming to you, letting you know that he was okay.

He's not okay, Teresa. He's dead.

He's dead.

How can you look these poor people.

In their face because.

Say that you lie. You lie.

Because all she wants at the end of the day is the moolah. That's all she cares. She wants the moolah.

Do you know who I am?

Yeah. Do you know who I am? Do you know what I do? No. Teresa, we people. I'm a grifter.

Thank you for signing that waiver.

Yes. You want to play my polytrick? Yes. Thanks for signing all those legal documents and allowed us to come in here today. I used those to my advantage and googled you.

We're making a gimmick out of you.

Yes.

Not suffering.

Sonny was more than a stepfather to me. He was a guiding light in a lot of ways. A cool guy that just basically took me under his wing. He just had a special way of just putting his charm on things.

He says, and I want to thank you for the way that you have really stepped up.

I actually think I believed Miss Cleo more than I believed Theresa caputa, for sure. Like Miss Cleo seemed more sincere and genuine than Teresa Caputa does. Yes.

He says, because every morning you're like, sonny, I don't know what I'm doing, but I'm going to do it. Is that correct?

No, it's not. Look at his face. He's like, yeah, my stepdad's not embarrassing me from the other side of the correct.

So know that when you do that, know that his soul is right beside you. And he says, and I want you to know that I'm proud on how you've been stepping up and really kind of doing things outside of the box or outside of things that you typically do.

That's spot on. That's spot on because I posted on Facebook three days ago. I wish Sonny was here, by the way. Sonny sounds like a cool dude. Sonny, wherever he is, is probably fucking knitwit. How did she get involved? Spot on. Yeah.

So know that he wants to thank you for that.

Well, thank you.

Wow.

Every day I walk into this place and go, I got a lot to do because there's a constant gain. And he always said it's one piece of duct tape away from falling in, but nobody can live up to saying he was one of a million.

I do what I do to help people, right?

No, you do what you do to make lots and lots of money, and then you torment them for the rest of their lives. You don't give them a business card or a cell phone number that they can call to have frequent conversations with their loved ones who unfortunately passed away. It is mean, it is cruel, and.

It is bullshit, and that's it. But how spirit gets me to move and to do things is just so incredible.

Well, you spoke to my wife earlier.

She was.

No way.

I didn't know that until five days ago.

My producers told me after they did the Facebook dig.

Yeah, we didn't realize that until we were looking at all your social media.

That's why I made sure she was working today.

Yes, we didn't realize that till we pulled backgroundreport.com was your wife.

Yeah, I guess Teresa didn't even know I was married to Shannon.

Oh, wow.

You guessed. Teresa didn't know. Of course you know that. She knew.

This is absolutely.

Oh, my God. This was really a family affair.

But the real question is, how was your food?

Let me tell you something. I might have to go get another hot dog.

I might have to go get another hot dog.

I'm so interested in what's going on in this place, but unfortunately, I've got to get back to the Ritz Carlton where I stay, and that's nowhere close to here. Unbelievable bullshit coming from Theresa Caputo's mouth. Again.

Again. Longer hair.

Someone hit her on the back of the head. Come on.

Every time she says it, I'm just like, no, Teresa, anything but that.

Anytime she claims that she's having multiple conversations with ghosts and having a conversation in front of.

With the person, my mom looked at her and kind of said.

Yeah, kind of said. Kind of looked at me. Can you tell me what she actually said? Because it's kind of important. Teresa, you're talking to my dead mother. Good. Unbelievable. Unbelievable. Well, we're here slaying Teresa Caputo again. I'm sorry if you're a fan. I'm not, actually. I'm not sorry if you're a fan. I hope that you get the comfort and, yeah, if it serves you, it serves you. Yeah, I hope you get the comfort and empathy that you're looking for. Because I do know how hard it is to lose somebody. And I still see Nico sometimes. I still smell Nico sometimes in this ghost. Poor Nico. Stinky, stinky Nico. If he was only here with us, he would not approve of Teresa Capoo.

Would bite her ankle.

That's right. And as always, as I've always said, and I always will say, I welcome Teresa on the show. I will be fair. I will be objective. Well, I'll be fair. I don't know if I'll be objective, but I'll be fair. Come in here and tell me how you do this. I want the details. Give me any information about anyone close to me who's passed away that is meaningful, relevant and detailed.

Not on social media.

Not on social media. And I promise you, you will turn around.

I give her a go.

I'd give her a go. Yeah. Listen, I'm open minded. Me too. I'm open minded about everything. I have my opinions like everybody else does, but I'm not stuck to them. And I've changed my mind a lot. A lot. I changed my mind. Okay.

No fear of decisions here.

Yeah. All right. TCBpodcast.com, that's where you go. You find out more information about the show, all the audio, all the video right there from one location, tCbpodcast.com, your free piggy fronting sticker with me as Teresa caputo on the way to your house. If you drop us a line at the contact us button at the commercial break on Instagram, TCbpodcast, on TikTok and YouTube.com thecommercial break our new phone number, 212433 TCb. Okay, Tina, I guess that's all I can do for today.

Okay, then.

But I'll tell you that I love you.

I love you. I'll say best to you and best to you.

Best to you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Tina and I do say, we will say, and we must say goodbye.

That is so stupid.