If you. If you are the interloper and if you coming in sitting where there was other people who had to allow you in, I think it is your job as a fucking human being to at least acknowledge the presence of the motherfucker that you sitting next to. Don't act like you're not sitting next to a whole ass human being. It don't take nothing to say, hi, how are you today? Now, that don't mean I want to talk to your bitch ass all the way to Boston. I don't want to see a picture of your dog and oh, shit like that. I'm just saying you should motherfucking speak.

On this episode of the commercial break.

You know, the devil works in strange ways. And I was just like the lord, and I was in the box, and the bitch turned her back, and the money was right there. I just grabbed the stack and put it in my bra, right?

Yeah.

So I had to work the rest of the day sweating money in my bra.

The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Oh, yeah, catholic kids. Welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is the luscious liaison of the commercial break, Chris. Enjoy. Hodley. Best to you, Chrissy.

Best to you, Brian.

Best to you. Out there in the podcast universe. Universe, have you ever been stung by something that made you swell up really big, like Jeff's VD canters? Do you ever get into the snake pit with Jeff and his snake just.

Bites you, and you swell up like.

A balloon all the time? That's what I imagine is going on.

Well, what really stings?

I mean, a bee, a scorpion.

I think. A jellyfish.

Yeah. My kid got stung by a jellyfish one time and not stung by a jellyfish, but ran into a jellyfish, I guess. I'm assuming that's what happened. And his poor little leg, just like, he had these little whip marks across his leg. It looked like it hurt, but I left him in the water in case I had things to do. I had to put on sunscreen.

He'll be fine.

I was getting a tan. I was like, go get for help. Go look for help. Look at all the lifeguards. They don't have something to say about this. What are you looking at me for? Like, I know how to handle a jellyfish stick. Come on, kid.

Grow up. Aren't you supposed to pee on something?

You are supposed to pee on something. Yes, you can pee on. It's true. You can pee on a jellyfish because apparently it has something to do with, like, not vinegar, but base. Right. Acid or base or. I remember in school when you used to learn about acids and bases and acids don't taste good, but bases taste weird or something like that. I forgot how it all goes.

Yeah.

Because I'm not a scientist per se. I play one on tv, but I'm not really, but I don't know. He survives. Anyway, I'm reading his story.

I was just contemplating if I would be able to pee on demand, like at the beach, if it was needed.

Oh, at my age, I can pee on demand, no problem. I can pee on any good at any time.

I don't know if I could at the beach in front of everybody. I don't know, but it would be.

Much easier for, like, in an emergency situation, I would pee on somebody, but you're at the Disney island or wherever you were, and here I am whipping my dick out to pee on a child. That's what happens over there. I'm saving the children.

I'm doing it for the kids.

Yeah, don't look at it. It gets smaller. Thanks. Anybody else have kids who need to be peed on? No, I'm saving the kids. I got a free pee station over here sponsored by Disney. On kids at Disney island? No, we went to the lifeguard station, and they poured some vinegar on them, or so I forgot what they poured on them. Something that actually helped him out, and it wasn't that bad. He wasn't even crying when he got the sting, but I could see the whip marks, and they were swelling up, and I was like, I better go check that. I better get that checked out. Yeah. But the reason why I asked this is I think I got stung by a bee once.

Well, you had that spider bite.

I had the spider bite that turned into necrosis. My actual skin was dying.

That was like a year ago.

Yeah, that was kind of crazy, actually. That's right. I totally forgot about that. I had a bee bite one time where my arm swollen up for like, I don't know, let's call it 5 hours. It had almost like a half baseball on my arm. And I'm not allergic to bees that I know of. It really hurt. It's the first time I think I've been stung by a bee, at least as an adult, that I can remember. And, man, did it hurt like a son of a bitch. Instantly hurt like a son of a bitch.

Did it just sneak up on you and sting you, or did you had no idea?

I was golfing with my brother and Hilton head or something like that. It was a sneak and sting. Here's my kid. Get stung by a jellyfish. He doesn't cry. It takes us 20 minutes to get to the lifeguard station because, of course, I don't know where it is. So we're walking in circles. I get stung by a bee, and I'm crying the entire way home. Literally. Drive that golf cart faster. It hurts so bad. The guy I was riding with was like, pete, you're such a mini. What are you doing? Get over it.

You'll be okay.

Here's why I asked, because I was reading a story. Scorpion stings traumatized Las Vegas hotel. Guest. In the testicles. In the testicles. A scorpion sting in the testicles cannot be the best part of your trip to Las Vegas.

No. Unless you're looking for that.

Unless you're looking for that kind of thing. You'll find it in Vegas. Trust me. California man has lawyered up. Has lawyered up. God damn it. This is what's wrong with this country. This is what's wrong with this. You're in the fucking desert in Las Vegas. I don't care what kind of hotel room you're in. There are scorpions. They're all around. It's like having roaches in Florida or Georgia. It's like having. Know. When you go to, I don't know, Mozambique or wherever, they have tons of mosquitoes. At the end of the day, you're in their environment. How is the hotel responsible? How can they keep every scorpion out of a hotel? Okay, well, I'll get through the story. Even though now I'm pissed off. California man lawyers up and is considering a lawsuit after being stung in the testicles by a scorpion that crawled into his bed at the luxury resort. At a luxury hotel in the Las Vegas Strip resort. Around 08:00 a.m. On December 26, Mr. Farachi, 61 years old, woke up in his suite at the Venetian. Oh, woke up at his suite. Okay, well, that's different.

You paid for the suite and the.

Suites, like, on the top floor?

Yeah.

Wow. That's scorpion. Have tail, will travel. He woke up at the Venetian to a searing pain in his groin area. You sure it was the scorpion, right? You're 61, dude. According to attorney Brian Vierk, roused suddenly from his sleep, Farachi rushed into the bathroom to figure out what's happening, only to spot an orange scorpion clinging onto the front of his boxer brief. I have been bitten by a scorpion at my groin. Testicles, Farachi wrote in an incident report. In it, Farachi said he was in bed when he was stung. And his symptoms included a lot of pain. He told Klas that the sensation was like someone stabbing me in my balls. It felt like sharp glass or a knife. Farachi, a contractor from Agora Hills, said he was shocked by what happened. He couldn't believe it. Ferrachi had the presence of mind as if he got his arm chopped off or something. The guy got bit by a scorpion. Give me a break. Had the presence of mind to snap several photographs of the scorpion hanging from his underwear, of which there's some pictures here.

I would be not focusing on taking pictures right away. If I saw a scorpion on me, I would want to get it off.

Yeah, well, I mean, it was hanging on his boxer. So he took the boxers off and then he took. This is stupid because he knows he wants a lawsuit. Now. The Venetian calm Ferrachi's room for the night. But Vieirga says the hotel staffers were very, very dismissive and unapologetic. What did you want them to do? It's their fault that there was a scorpion in your boxers. Couldn't you have picked that up along the way? Like, maybe it was on your clothing when you walked into the hotel. Maybe you were sunning yourself earlier. It walked onto your bathing suit. It got in your room. This is not the staffer's fault. You're going to sue them because the staffers weren't apologetic enough? What a douche canozle. Mr. Farachi, grow a pair of extremely swollen balls and stop it. This is why this country sucks sometimes, is because you can literally sue anybody for any reason at any time. And this is one of those ridiculous lawsuits that makes no sense. It was an accident. Shit happens. They comped your room, a suite at the Venetian in Las Vegas. You're fine. Everything's fine. Stop it. Stop with your bullshit.

The staffers aren't supposed to bend hand to knee on foot kissing the ring of Mr. Ferrachi because you got an orange scorpion on your testicles. Stop it. Stop with your testicle balls complaining and move on with life. That's what I have to say. You're obviously doing well for yourself if you're staying at the suite at the Venetian. Obviously. Either that or you're gambling a whole shit ton of money away. Either way, you got expendable cash. Move on. Leave it alone. And you know what I would ask for? Can I have this room comped? And would you mind if doing this again another weekend down in the future? And then I might leave it at that.

Maybe pay for the doctor visit or something. I don't know what he had to.

Do, but if the maids weren't running in immediately with ice packs and ready to rub cream all over my swollen testicles, I would sue. That's the kind of guy I am.

That's where you.

That's right. You know who wouldn't sue because of getting bitten in the testicles? Lunell, our guest today on PCB infomercials. Probably because she doesn't have testicles, but regardless. You get what I'm saying? Lunell. Extraordinarily funny lady who has been around so many blocks, it's not even funny. Lunell has an incredible and crazy story. You know her from probably Borat is where you know her from. She played the prostitute, Borat's prostitute in that movie, but she's a noted comic all over the place.

She's got a residency in Vegas.

She does a residency in Vegas with Jimmy Kimmel every couple of weeks. She is now going to be at the Apollo theater. The real Apollo theater.

Legendary.

That's right. And let me tell you exactly when that day is. I know when it is because it's the 26 April. You can get your tickets. They are now available. This is the first time that Lunell has been headlining herself at the Apollo Theater. We're excited to talk to her about it. Today. You can go to at Lunell, which is l u e n e l l. I kept saying Luanelle, but it's not Luenell. Like, I'm adding extra vowels into her name at Luanelle on Instagram. She's fucking hilarious. We're super excited to have this legend of comedy on our show today. TCB infomercial with Lunell. Get your tickets to that Apollo theater headlining show on the 26 April 2024. In case you're listening to this way in the future, you've already missed it. And what I would like to do, Chrissy, if it's okay with you, if you don't mind, because I do like to get your permission before we do anything, if you don't mind. Do you? I like to think I do.

Okay.

Hasard thinks the same thing. I'm like, but we talked about it. She's like, no, you talked about it. I didn't agree to it, but I think you can agree. We want Lunell on the.

Yes.

Yes. So let's take a short break. Let's get her in here. We're super excited to have Lunell, Legend of Comedy, on the commercial break. We'll be back.

I know you're already on your phone. So pull up instagram and follow us at the commercial break and then follow us on TikTok at TCB podcast. Done. Perfect. Thank you. Since you're at the ready, why not text us? Hello at 212433 TCB. Or if you've got some drama in your life, a little fun story or anything really. We're desperate for content. Call and leave us a message at 212433 TCB. And don't forget to check out tcbpodcast.com because that's got it all. Speaking of having it all, let's listen to our fabulous sponsors and get back to the commercial break.

This episode is sponsored by Betterhelp. If you've been listening to the show for the last six to nine months, then you know Chrissy and I have both had life events that have been very difficult for us. But that's the way it goes. Sometimes life takes unexpected turns. Chrissy and I both use therapy as a way to learn coping skills for those big life events, but also for the day to day difficulties that we all experience. Therapy isn't just for people who've experienced major trauma. I've found that it can help in the best of times, the worst of times, and everything in between. Therapy really is a part of my health routine. I actually look forward to therapy appointments now. But if you're like me also, you probably have a very busy schedule. Betterhelp is designed to make that process a little bit more flexible, a little bit more convenience, and suited to your schedule. It's entirely online. All you have to do is fill out a brief questionnaire, and then you get matched with a licensed therapist. And by the way, you can change therapists at any time, no additional cost. Learn to make time for what makes you happy with Betterhelp.

Go visit betterhelp.com commercial today to get 10% off your first month. That's betterhelp he lp.com commercial. It only works if you work it as they say. And taking the first step is as easy as going to betterhelp he lp.com commercial. Then you'll get 10% off your first month. And if you're anything like me, you'll start to look forward to the therapy appointments. And we want to thank betterhelp again for being a sponsor of the commercial break.

It's after bedtime. The kids are asleep, and the moms.

Are out to play.

We're Dina and Kristen, the duo behind the Instagram account.

Big little feelings. I'm Dina.

I'm a child therapist and mom of two who nerds out on all things neurobiology and psychology. And Kristen is a parent coach who wrangles three kids on a daily basis here to give it to us like it is. We weren't meant to do this parenting thing alone. Consider, after bedtime, your village. Follow after bedtime with big little feelings on the odyssey app or wherever you get your podcasts.

And Lunell is here with us now. Hi, Lunell. Thank you so much. We're grateful for your time today. How are you?

Hi. I'm good. I'm real good.

Okay, Lunell, inquiring minds want to know. I have a question for you. You seem like the type of human being that gets invited to all the parties because your personality, as I know it, as a gentleman, looking at you on your comedy specials and your podcast appearances and all that, you look like you get invited to all the parties and that you probably don't turn down many invitations, like you're out there doing your thing. What is your party exit style? Do you do irish goodbyes? Are you the last person at the party? Or do you leave hugs and kisses out the door?

First of all, you're absolutely correct. I do get invited to a lot of things, but I don't go to as many as I used to, because now I like to be a little bit more exclusive. My style is to just leave, because if you say that you're leaving now. Oh, let me get a picture. And so now you're 35 more minutes in there taking pictures because you have announced that you're leaving. I just slowly sneak out the door and leave. Is that an Irish.

Yeah, that's an irish goodbye. Well, as from irish descendants, I will tell you right now, we have perfected this, and I think you're 100% on the mark. And I'm not famous. No one recognizes me. I have a face for radio. That's why we do a podcast. So I just leave.

I have a body for radio. But listen, you want to know about the craziest party that I. This isn't going to air tonight, but tonight, no. Tomorrow night, I'm invited to a party. Do you want to know what it is?

Of course, yes.

It will have happened by the time this airs. So, listeners, you have to go on my instagram, you'll probably see pictures of what I'm about to talk about.

Okay.

Tomorrow night, I'm invited to go see Madonna with Rosie O'Donnell as he, Griffin, Sia, Paris Hilton, and Katy Perry.

No fucking way. Lunell, that is like, you are rolling with. That is a straight a list. Rolling deep right there.

I know, and I have know one of these things is not like the other. I have no business in that click. But Kathy and I are comics. She invited me to her home where I met everybody else, and then Rosie was a, and then Sia took a liking to me. And so I've been in this little click ever you got.

Do you guys go out often or is it just like a group of girls that occasionally you guys say, hey, let's go do this because it's really cool? Or do you hang out more frequently than that?

Well, that whole clique has come to Vegas to see.

Yep.

At Jimmy Kim private Jet. And then we go over, Kathy's in Malibu and we go to see us. So we do things from time to time.

Now, have you ever had FaceTime with Madonna or is this your first time being in the same.

This will be my first time. I may or may not meet her because I know the click is going backstage, but I have a 130 red eye if Madge is not on time. I've heard that she's not. But see, let me just say this about that. As an audience member of anything, as a person who came up through the theater and as a comic, I do not know how they sustain a career not being on time. I think it's disrespectful to your audience, her, Lauren Hill, and other people who do that habitually. Things happen, and you can be late, clearly. But to be known for being late, I think it's hugely disrespectful.

Agreed.

And costly, because if you go overtime, there are significant fees per minute that the artist is charged for these venues. So I don't see how they sustain a career. I don't. Because we could never.

You grew up in theater, so I think it's referred to as a pregnant pause. Like you pause for effect. Right. You're getting the audience anticipating something. So I can see 515 minutes.

People are like 2 hours.

That's crazy.

And it's just so disrespectful. How do you maintain your career? I don't understand it. I wouldn't hire anybody who do that. I don't care how much money they would dry in. I wouldn't work with anybody like that. And I don't give a damn who it is.

There you go.

Well, I'm jealous because I grew up listening to Madonna and then to be in that group of pretty exclusive human beings going, I'm hoping for you that Madge decides to get her butt on time.

I hope so, because I got a red eye, bro. I got to go. So I'm seeing her in Los Angeles, I think the crypto or something, I'm not sure. But I will have the group shot of me and the girls. And then even if I don't get it with match, I'll get their group shot and explain that I had to go. You know what saying yes. Stay tuned at Lunell on instagram and you'll see the results.

Your instagram. I can't wait to see, by the way, and I love your constant homages to Prince, who is a favorite here in the room. I know you have a tattoo. You've taken it to a whole nother level. I know the artist formerly known as Prince. The symbol prince revolution on my microphone hand.

Yeah. But I also have bad in red. That Michael.

That's the bad cover. Yeah.

So I have to have both because I grew up and it was always pitting one against the other. Pick Michael a prince. Michael a prince. It's both.

I think it's both.

I was at his last concert here in Atlanta.

Prince at Michael's? No. Prince's.

Yes.

You were.

Yes. So sad that he know very shortly after. But what a show it was. His piano and a microphone.

Oh, yeah. He amazing.

Such a beautiful artist. And my very first concert that I ever went to, like, real concert I ever went to was the bad tour. The Michael.

My parents, both of you are.

That's right. Hey, Lunell, I got to agree with you about something. When it comes to airplanes, I think one of our intrepid researchers found out that you consider yourself the unofficial air marshal of every flight. Self appointed air marshal of Sharon. I've been saying this on this show since probably episode number one. Airline travel is fucking miserable. Everyone acts like animals when they start getting close to an airplane. And when you get on the flight. Please don't. Please don't bother me. I don't need your conversation. I probably don't want your conversation now. You probably don't roll like I do. I would imagine you're a very familiar face, like you've been doing this for a long time. It's probably hard to go most places without being noticed by at least a few people, especially an airport. But I just don't want to be bothered. Do you find being a celebrity that people are just some. If you end up sitting next to them on the plane, they're like, oh, landlord. Lunell, tell me your story. I want to hear all about, like, kind of like the commercial break. Kind of like here on this podcast.

Well, first of all, I'm very undercover. When I go to the airport, I have on a mask. I have on shades. I have on stuff like this, although they may be a little opulent, but I'm usually undercover. A lot of times it's my voice that gives me away. Or it could be my nails, which I don't have on now because I was doing a project and I had to get rid of the nails. They'll be back. When I sit, I travel first class. And as I was saying, in the special, 90% of the time, nobody even speaks to me. They don't even say, good morning. How are you? I think that is required that you do that. But then as far as I don't want to hear about your lupus treatments and shit like that, I don't need to know all that. And then sometimes I just lie because I'm never going to see you again. The minute the bell rings for you to get your bag, we're done. And why should I sit and tell you my life story? You're nobody unless we're going to continue a relationship, which we normally don't.

Sure.

I just lie and say, my father's an heiress. I'm married to a lebanese millionaire. I say shit like that.

That's fun. You're the whole character.

Yeah, because who cares? Why are you spilling your life to a stranger? But if I do start talking every now and then, some people can be fun. Or every now and then, people will progressively get drunk. I don't.

No.

But I do think it's required that people say, hello, how are you today? Something like that. And don't act like you're not sitting next to somebody, because if some shit goes down, you're going to be grabbing my hands. Oh, my God.

Help me save you. That's so true.

If you didn't speak, you'd be on your own. Because you didn't even speak.

Get your own flotation device.

That's right.

Fuck you get your own oxygen mask.

But you can see that whole scenario play out. If you do watch my Netflix comedy special. I talk extensively about airplane travel.

Yeah, it's so funny. I just watched it last week. When do you think so? You're like a bona fide celebrity. And I know that you probably put on this mask because you just don't sometimes, like, every human being in the world. And most of us don't have to worry about this. We just really don't want to be bothered. We want to go about living our lives and do our things go to the grocery store, go to wherever without being bothered. When did you really start getting recognized? Was it after Borat or previous to Borat? Was that, like, an inflection point for you when everyone was like, oh, my gosh, you were in that movie Borat.

Well, see, I have two different demographics.

Sure.

I have my white demographic and I have my black demographic. So my black demographic has known who I am for years.

Yeah.

The white demographic didn't really recognize me until Borat. Yeah. And then after that, it was a wash after that, and then now it's always sunny in Philadelphia.

You're hilarious.

I'm on hacks with Gene smart right now. I do, too. That shows amazing gene smart, and it mirrors my life. It's about an older female comic in Las Vegas. So that's me.

Yeah.

You're doing the residency at Jimmy Kimmel's in Vegas?

Yes. I've been there since 2019, actually. But when the doors open. But I just started in 2019, and 21, we were shut down.

Right, sure.

So I came back at the end of 22. No, I came back in 20. He didn't even open for almost a year after they said Vegas could open.

Okay.

He didn't open because Jimmy's club is not in the casino. It stands alone in the link promenade. And so he had the ability to do or not do whatever he want to.

Sure.

So he didn't open immediately. Still paranoid. He didn't want anybody to get COVID in his club. So I came back in 2023, and I'm continuing on now.

So you maintain residency. You were telling us before we started maintain residency in Las Vegas. I mean, like an actual house in Vegas in you. Which one do you prefer? Do you like being in Vegas?

Well, I have a bigger, more plush house in Vegas because you get more bang for your buck in Las Vegas. The house I have in Las Vegas, if you picked it up and put it in Los Angeles, it'd be 3.5 or more.

Yeah.

And I definitely didn't pay that in Vegas. And I'm in a gated community, and I have a swimming pool and all that stuff in Vegas. My house here in Los Angeles is in the Crenshaw district. It's an older home. It's still very cute, very cozy, very comfortable. But it's a one car garage. I got a three car garage. I don't have a know. I like them prefer. I prefer the home in Vegas. Of course.

Right? Yeah.

Okay. So I heard you tell a story, and I heard you say something, and I want you to tell me, is this true? And then follow up, if you could, with the actual story. You robbed a bank once, went to jail for a couple of months for it.

Technically, it's called embezlement, but it is, in fact bank robbery. And yes, that's true. I was working for a bank, so I actually stole from the bank that I worked at.

Oh, so you actually were an employee at the bank, so that's why they called it embezzlement. Yes. And then tell me if this story comes full circle. So you go to jail for a couple of months, and then you get out of jail, you go straight to a comedy club to do comedy. Do not pass go. Is that correct?

Yes, within days of getting out. Because, of course, I had no clothes.

Right.

Because you go to jail, even if you go to jail for eight months, you're going to be released in the same clothes you were arrested in, unless somebody brings you clothes, and nobody did. So I got arrested in my pajamas. So I didn't go straight to the comedy club. I went to my girlfriend's house on the bus in the pajamas, and then she bought me some clothes. And within a few days, I went to the comedy store because I felt the need to purge myself. That's how much I love comedy. Before I even went home to see my child, I went to a comedy club, and then I went home.

Wow. And then is it true that like a year later, or some change later, you actually ended up filming a movie at the same place where you spent?

Crazy.

You have to tell me this.

Yeah, I did the Rock with Sean Connery and Nicholas Cage.

Oh, great movie. Yeah.

And in some scenes in the rock, they were shot at Twin Towers Correctional Facility, which was brand new. The jail in Los Angeles was called Sybil Brand. Brand was in the process of closing because it was so raggedy and Twin Towers was opening in between that time. They filmed some scenes in the mean in Twin Towers. They filmed some scenes from the Rock in Twin Towers. So by the time I got arrested, I was incarcerated in Twin Towers. The movie had came out. So I'm actually in a movie that was filmed in a jail I was incarcerated in.

That's incredible.

Can't make this shit up.

Make that shit up. What a full circle moment. It's like, listen, I'm sure that you didn't steal the money because you wanted to go buy a pair of fancy pants or get a brand new car. I'm sure you felt like you needed the money, right? But then full circle. Now you're filming a movie with the movie stars of the moment at that time, Sean Connery and Nicolas Cage. And you're one of the actresses in this movie. That must have felt good. Like, it must have been is I. I did, like, I pulled myself out of this moment, and here I am. And I just think that's such a great full circle. I mean, such a. I don't know, like a graphic representation of a full.

Well, in full disclosure, I actually did steal the money just because I didn't take it to help somebody and their cancer treatment or any shit like that. But I felt what it was was the tellers in the bank, which I was one, and I had criminal mentality. That wasn't the only scam I did at the bank. But the tellers at the bank, I feel, are the face of the bank. They're the people who interact with the customers. They're the people who build relationships with the customers, who people trust with their funds and stuff like that. So we're the ones. It's the tellers. This was 28 years ago. Then if you work two weeks with all this money and you get a paycheck that's only like $235, I got real sick of that, and I felt really used because I felt like tellers should get more money. So when they told me that I was going to start working in the vault, I didn't even have any thoughts of taking the money. Because you always have two people in the vault. I wasn't in the vault alone, sure, but, you know, the devil works in strange ways.

And I was just like the Lord, and I was in the vault, and the bitch turned her back, and the money was right there. I just grabbed a stack and put it in my bra, right?

Yeah.

Because there really was no camera inside the vault at that time. I'm sure there are now, but there were not then. So I had to work the rest of the day sweating with this money in my bra.

Was it?

And then when I got it, 6.

Hours of your life, like, working through the rest of that shit.

It wasn't the most. Incarceration was the most. Yeah, but it was pretty stressful. And then with the money, I did a few good things for my parents, which they should have known that something was up because I hadn't been able to do a damn thing for them before. And I blessed some people and bought some shit and paid some bills and stuff like that. Me and my roommate were living in a pretty nice apartment on the beach in Long beach and had got behind her to rent. And she was a call girl, and I wasn't going to do that. I'd rather be a thief.

Right?

Yeah.

So that's how that happened.

Yeah. Chrissy and I talk about this often on the show about it's, know, you go to McDonald's, you might get a little attitude, maybe your burger has the onions you didn't ask for. Whatever. But if you're working at McDonald's, they don't pay you enough to give a shit. And so they're the face of the brand, yet the brand who's making billions of dollars can't afford to pay them a couple extra bucks. Now there's a whole nother conversation that goes with that. And I understand it goes, it certainly.

Is, because in this Crenshaw district where I am right now, there was a Ralph's, which is a big grocery store chain out here, there was a Ralph's over there that everybody in the area went to. The people went on strike to just get like $5 raise. And whoever owned the grocery store, rather than pay the $5 raise, they closed the whole grocery store.

No shit. Really?

Yeah.

Oh my God.

Yeah. I think we're back in robber baron days. I mean, to put it nicely. I think we're back robber baron days. Yeah, to put it nicely.

Yeah. The rich get richer and the poor get. And the rich don't have a problem with the poor getting poorer.

No.

And I embezzled it and did my time. There's a lot of governmental officials that are embezzling and not doing no time.

Exactly.

Right.

Okay.

And they won't do any time because they, and they won't do any because everyone knows where the bodies are buried. And as I have said on occasion before, when you know where the bodies are buried, when each person knows where the bodies are buried, literally or figuratively, it is mad, mad to get involved in bringing somebody down. It's mutually assured destruction, and no one wants to do that. And that is the balance that keeps some of these people in power and holding the bag of just. It's crazy.

That's why the Epstein's got away with what they got away with for so long. And why the gang got away with what they got away with for so long. Nobody wants to tell on anybody and everybody knows what's going on. So the protection of the children or the protection of women goes out the window. Nobody cares or the little people or anything like that. So I'm total activist for the people, you know what I'm saying? I don't play the industry game. Nobody people had asked me before, have you ever been sexually assaulted or anything like that by anybody industry? I said, they wouldn't dare.

That's right.

Because I'm telling.

Yes.

I'm not waiting 20 years to do it either.

No, I'm telling, like, that day.

Right.

I'm telling that moment because.

And I don't care about none of the fallout.

No.

If I didn't have it before I went there, I can clearly live without it. If I never do another movie, tv show or anything like that, as long as I do my standup, which is people driven, not industry driven, and I do podcasts and things like this, I'm still going to eat. Nobody going to stop me.

Yeah, we were talking to Tom Papa. I think you would know who he. Yeah, Tom's great, right? And so we were talking to Tom, and I was asking about late night television shows like Jimmy's show and Letterman when he was on, and Jay Leno and all this other stuff. And he said, you know, I used to get excited about doing that because it would move the needle, but now it's more about curating your audience and then feeding them directly through podcasting, social media, going live performances, people can.

That's my goal. I wanted to be the next black female with a late night talk show, and everybody that I've known that had a talk show told me that how I am, that it'll never work. Like Arsenio said, it's not going to happen. George Lopez said it's not going to happen for network television, which means they would have to push me over to Netflix or Hulu or Amazon prime. Well, I think that's jive, because it is late night after all, so the kitties should be in bed, so I have more freedom. But see, then you got these affiliates and these sponsors and all those people that are pulling the string. So I don't care about that. So I probably will have to do it on the streaming service, and I'll probably still get affiliates and sponsors, but they won't be telling me what to do.

Yeah, well, that's where the audience is moving anyways.

That's where the audience is.

I just wanted to break the no shade, but late night tv is lighter than daytime. You got white man after white man after white man after white man after white. No women, no minorities. So what are we doing?

Are you friends with Arsenio? Are you friendly with Arsenio?

Yeah, we made coming to America together.

Yeah, that's right. I don't know this answer. Did you ever appear on Arsenio's show.

Yes, I did.

I loved that show. That was my favorite.

And I wish the reboot had taken a little bit further, because I really.

But it's the affiliates and shit that pulled the string on it, not the people. If that was the case, George Lopez show would still be on as well.

That's true also. Yeah, well, George got screwed. Know the network. Who knows? George got screwed? There's no doubt about it that George got screwed, and George Lopez's show was really funny. Speaking of daytime television, you were friendly with Wendy Williams, weren't you? You show a few times. How do you feel about what's going.

On with wendy's all over the news?

Well, I think that it was some dirty pool filming a physically and mentally ill woman. Yeah, I think that they should be ashamed of yourself. And the only reason to have done it would have been to help the case of the family against the guardianship, to show that, oh, these people are abusing my sister. Here's what they're doing. Here's what it is. We, the family, are requesting to take control of her. And not to say your family won't rip you off, some of that may happen, but her son and her dad, who is left, and her sister and brother surely should have some say so in the welfare of their family member, not some guardian that nobody knows that has taken her away.

Right.

Nobody's denying that Wendy should maybe be in a facility and in one where she can't check out when she wants to.

Correct.

Nobody's denying that. We want her to get the best health care that she can get, mentally and physically. And also, she should definitely, even if she don't have access to some of the money, she should definitely have access to some other parts of the money to do with what she wants to. She earned.

She did earn it.

Yeah, I think you're right in the. Now, I wonder if that documentary is part of pushing a larger narrative. Right.

Well, see, she probably had a three picture deal with lifetime. She delivered the first documentary. It was tremendously popular because her name is on as executive producer for this disastrous documentary that was just so. They probably have a contract that she's got to fulfill. And so there's that one, and there may be another one coming of something, maybe the wrap up or what her name will be on that, because clearly she's not in any condition to produce anything, right?

No. Yeah, she does look. I mean, at least what we see on camera, at times, she looks confused, mentally and physically not. Well, she does look crazy. And I think you're right. I think she's in a situation where she does need help. I'm not diagnosing her, but I'm just saying that I think appears that she needs help and not some stranger managing her affairs and telling her where to go and when to be there, but people who care about her and love her and know her best, those are the people that are most equipped to help her in this situation. It seems like for some reason, it's just they're an arm's length away, and that seems crazy. But let's talk about you. You recently opened on Broadway, is that correct? Chicago for Chicago.

Did we hear Chicago the musical? Yes. Right. I had just a little limited engagement that was facilitated by my appearance on the Tamron Hall show. She knew it was a dream of mine to do theater again because I did theater before I ever started in stand up, which is one of the reasons I've never really had stage fright or anything, because I was trained in front of live audiences before I ever did stand up, which I think that can only be an asset to any stand up comedian anyway.

Definitely.

So I got a chance to do it. The ambassador theater on Broadway, not off Broadway, around the corner from Broadway on Broadway. And a lot of family members came, and it was a great experience. I know for a fact, though, that I do not wish to do eight shows a week.

Yeah, that's a lot, Lunell.

Like we do.

I've gone from doing six shows a week just doing stand up by myself. Well, I still do six, but I do four on the road and I do two at home. My residency, but they're not at 730. They're not 930 at night. And I'm up by then and moving around. I don't want to do the Broadway thing. I'm a little bougie now.

I think you've earned it.

Me, too.

I think you've earned it.

So that's why Broadway actors, soap opera actors, they should get all the props all the time because they really work their behinds off. And if you're a dancer, you have to take class, you have to stay healthy, you have to stay stretched. You can have injuries. You could be out at any moment. All that stuff, it's dangerous. Moving part. Like, I went to go see Phantom of the opera just by myself and that chandelier. If you don't work it right, you're going to get clocked in the head by that. It's dangerous. And so I give all my props to theater actors.

Me, too. I went to go see Cirque du Soleil recently, and one of the acrobats fell. Right. Now, luckily, they were able to scoot her off stage, and it looked like she was sure.

I've seen it in Vegas. The Michael show is Cirque du Soleil, and it's very, very dangerous.

Yes. But I thought to myself, I hope there's some kind of union involved here where she's going to get paid no matter what happens, and that she's going to a hospital or doctor or ambulance to get the kind of care she needs without having to worry about paying for that. Because big movie stars, right, they're insured to the hilt. And I'm not saying that their job is easy either, but they come in, they do bits and pieces at a time. It's a lot of luxuriating that goes on, I'm sure, backstage and in these movies, and then you see a Broadway play or an off Broadway play or whatever. These are like, they're doing it eight times. Just like a stand up comedian, they're doing it eight times. Never know what the audience is going to bring. You never know what's going to be thrown your way. Curveball, left ball, people yelling in the audience. It's a whole different animal to do it live.

Absolutely.

Yeah. That's why we're chicken shit. We just sit behind the microphone here in the comfort of our own studio.

Speaking of Bougie, I saw that you had a connection with the Atlanta housewives. You maybe appeared on a show.

Did you appear on one of their.

Yeah, yeah, I did. Real Housewives of Atlanta. Yes, one or two times. We're big fans because at that time, Claudia Jordan is my friend. She was on the show. But since then, I've become good friends with Cynthia Bailey. And I know candy. Of.

Course we know Cynthia. Yeah, we had a live streaming channel once, and they did shows on the streaming channel with us from time to time. And they were at the both of them.

Yeah. I even know, like, some in real housewives of, you know, there's Erica Jane is on that show. She also has her residency in Las Vegas. But her and I were both Savage x Fenty lingerie ambassadors for Rihanna at the same time. So we did Rihanna's fashion show that was on Amazon prime, and we had to do it during the corona. So you're half naked, but you got a mask on.

Didn't you create an Onlyfans page from that? Because you had, like, as the story goes, as one of our researchers found, that you did the Rihanna lingerie modeling and then you had extra photos left over. So as kind of a lark, you were like, let me put them on. Only fans. We'll see if we can make some money. And it ended up becoming pretty successful.

Yeah. Then they asked for some other things, and I did a little bit of it, but it's like, who are you going to get to photograph you, and how are you going to do all this? And then they want more, and they want more, and that's not what I do full time.

Yeah, of course.

So it was getting a little too demanding and a little too demented, so I shut it down. I shut it down.

Yeah.

One of my favorite bits that you've done, and I think it actually was filmed here in Atlanta, but it's an old bit. It was, know when Facebook was all the rage, and you talk about how Facebook in texting, like DM in texting, and you're like, I got catfished by a dick pic. Because every dick pic that comes my way is gloriously vain does not belong to the person who sent it.

They're lying. And if you hook up with them and you meet them, you decide to go to bed, you're like, hey, wait a minute. Where's that mold? Didn't you have a mold?

All right, so, Lunell, the big announcement is you're doing the Apollo Theater in Harlem on the 26 April. And tickets are available, I'm sure@Apollo.com. And are you excited? This clearly is not your first time on the Apollo stage, right?

It absolutely is. Performing. I've been to the Apollo. I've walked the Apollo. I know people who work there. Curate the place or curate the place. So I've been all up in the dressing rooms, I've written my name on the wall, I've rubbed the tree trunk. I've done all that, but it was all fake because I was just doing. And then I had to leave. But this is my first time performing there. And it's so iconic because what do they call it? I think it's a landmark of. And then, you know, if you look back through the history, especially Motown era, and all the audience, all the people who performed there, and then, hell, James Brown laid and stayed there when he passed away. And it's just unbelievable that I am going to get to perform there. But as a comic, and you can attest to this, you really ain't shit until you conquer New York audience anyway.

That's correct.

You can be the big deal in Mississippi, you can be the big deal in Atlanta. You can be the big deal in San Francisco. But if nobody knows you in New York, you ain't nobody.

That's right. That's true.

My wife asked me the other night because we have guests on frequently, and they're celebrities and they're wonderful, like Lunell and she know a lot of them are in LA and a lot of them in New York. Why do a lot of comics choose New York over LA? And I told her, I said, because the comedy scene is in New York. They have one in LA. But you got to conquer New York.

It's very limited. It's very clickish in LA, and it's all segregated as know. You got your gay night, you got latin night, you got black night, you got female night. You got all this kind of stuff. But in New York, you could go do any room and everybody is going to give you a chance. You got like 5 seconds to. You better impress them with what you got on. You better impress them in the tonality of your voice and your language and everything. You might have five minutes. You might have five minutes maybe, but they'll grow some balls on you. The New York audience is not for kids. It's no joke now for television and film. Of course, Los Angeles, this is the place for that. But if you're going to do stand up, if you're going to end up being a Lenny Bruce or Richard or something like that, you've got to go through New York. It's going to toughen you up and all that. Because regionally you can talk about any kind of little Mamsy Pamsy shit you want to. But now you can't talk about that shit when you come to New York.

You got to talk about what the east coast people are familiar with. You got to talk about the l train. You got to talk about, know what a kniche is, know where to get.

It.

You got to know what you're talking about.

Yeah. I love Lunell and your frankness. Your comedy is so in your face. I love it. I've been a big fan for a long time.

That's incredible. You know, you never know who knows you. And I'm always just like. I'm like, with the click that I mentioned before, I'm like, what in the world does Kathy Griffin know about me to invite me to her home? Well, and now we're very good friends. You just got to give people a chance. You can't really judge a book. I've been guilty of that. I've been guilty of that all the time.

Sure.

But I learned that you really just can't do that because you don't know. And then the person that you think is a loser and a hack, which. That's my favorite word. That's why I like hack.

I like hack.

I'll tell somebody a hack in a. You may. In this town, in this industry, they may write something like an Issa Ray to start off on Twitter or become something on Instagram. Go from Instagram to YouTube. YouTube. You may think somebody's a hacker. Next thing you know, you're auditioning for them.

That's true.

Yeah. I oftentimes never at least to think in my older, as I get a little bit older, I'm less and less judgmental because I realize that first impressions are actually not everything. Right. Because people can surprise person. I agree.

Because I think even as a comic, we have like, a 6th sense. We can read bullshit really quick.

Yes.

So sometimes your first impression is who that fool is. Yes. But sometimes it's not. So it's a crapshoot.

Well, I've learned to trust my intuition, but give people a second chance. Right. But always trust my intuition because 99% of the time, I'm right. But that's just because of life experiences.

But as a female, we can give you a second chance, but we might give you a second chance.

Don't I know it.

You can get a second chance, but I still got my.

All right, Lunell, tell Kathy and Rosie and Sia, and if you get a chance to talk to Madge, tell her to get her clock fixed. Tell Madge to get her clock fixed. Tell all the ladies we said hello. I hope you have a wonderful time. You'll come back on. I know. We'll have you back on Apollo. The 26 April tickets available. Go get them now. Follow her on social media. She's got so much material out there.

Yeah. Jess, if you want to see this stuff we're talking about, follow me on Instagram at Lundell, at luenell. And if you're planning your summer Vegas vacays, plan in a Sunday or a Monday and come see me at Jimmy Kimmel's comedy club.

I'm going to be doing a conference later on this year. Like, I'm going to an industry conference later on this year in Vegas. I'm going to see if I can come see you.

I've got material about conferences, too.

There's a lot of.

Conferences.

Another word for let's go sleep with somebody. Exactly.

Let's get drunk.

Right.

Lunell, you're the best. The legend. Lunell, thank you so much. For coming and spending time with us.

Thank you all so much. So much. So much.

Talk to you soon, Michael Prince.

All right, bye, y'all. Bye.

Have fun.

Bye bye.

Well, thank the baby Jesus. Brian took a breath. And now I will use this opportunity to let you know that we've got a brand new phone number. That's right, it's 212433 TCB. And you can text us anytime you want or you can call and leave us a voicemail and we might just use your message on the show once Brian gets through all the messages he missed last year, of course. Anyway, you can also find and dm us on Instagram at the commercial break and on TikTok at TCB podcast. And of course, all of our audio and video is easily found on tcbpodcast.com. Now, I'm going to thank g one more time that we have sponsors. So thank G. And here they are.

Wow. Lunell is.

She's a force.

Fucking fight. She is a force.

I love her so much. And her badass Gucci rhinestone glasses.

Can you believe that? She says she's bougie. She is, right. But she wears it well, I'm telling you.

Oh, my God.

I've been following her for a while on Instagram and she's just one of these naturally funny human beings. She takes no shit. She takes no prisoner. She says exactly what's on her mind be damned. She is literally going to the Madonna concert tomorrow night and she is telling Madonna to please be fucking on time because it's rude and unacceptable. And she wouldn't hire Madonna to do anything because Madonna is always constantly late, which is a true story, by the way. Madonna is notoriously late on these concerts. One time like 4 hours, but she's going with Kathy Griffin. Who knew? Who knew Lunell was mixing it up with Kathy Griffin?

I love the crew.

I do love the crew, too.

Came together on that.

Sia. Is Sia still wearing her face hair?

I don't know. I think she's kind of.

I read somewhere that she originally did that because she was a little bit older and she felt like.

Yeah, exactly.

She didn't want people judging her based on her looks. But then also I think she want.

To get recognized, avoid the fan.

God damn. We should start doing that because I'm pretty sure any day now people are going to start recognizing us somewhere. Like most likely on our instagram channel where they're there. But anyway, someday we'll get recognized. And hot take. She thinks Wendy Williams family has helped to orchestrate some of this documentary shit to get the public to put some pressure on this conservatorship. And I agree with it 100%. Yeah, I mean, I don't know that much about Wendy Williams. I would watch her in the afternoon sometimes when I was at home sick like a small child. I'd put on Wendy Williams because she was entertaining. Wendy was always entertaining. Yeah, she really was. She was a little too gossip poundy. The show was a little too gossip poundy.

But that was kind of her thing.

That was her thing, yeah. But I could guarantee it wasn't bothersome to me. I would watch the show and I would love it. And Lunell's been on a couple of different times on Wendy Williams. And what a sad, sad thing to happen. Apparently she's got that same thing that Bruce Willis had. Like her family is saying she had the same thing, that frontal lobbal dementia and what a sad thing to have happened. Someone needs to get in between that conservator and Wendy and show her some love. And did you watch the documentary?

No, I haven't watched it. But it's been popping up in my newsfeed a lot about what's going on and there's concern there should be so hot take.

She's going to see Madonna with Kathy Griffin and Sia and Rosie O'Donnell. And Rosie O'Donnell.

Paris Hilton. If I think she said Paris Hilton, I don't know.

We just had the conversation now I can't remember. That's how good my greatest. But most importantly, and as she mentioned, she is playing the Apollo Theater. So if you are in New York or if you're going to be in New York on the 26 April, you can now get tickets by going to, I think it's theapolo.com. We'll put a link in the show notes because I'm probably wrong and that way you can actually go to the right place, get your tickets, show some Lunell, some love. She's also at Jimmy Kimmel's comedy club in Las Vegas, now reopened apparently for business residency. The residency, and I was just looking, they've got quite a few resident comics and they're all notable names. You would want to go there. And it looks like really suave in there.

I bet you know Jimmy's going to do it.

You know Jimmy's going to do it, right? He's got a little extra money, right? He's got a lot of that extra late night cash. They're still paying those people pretty well, aren't they? I think so, yeah. He's the last of a dying breed, which makes me kind of sad. I was actually talking to Astrid about this, and I'm like, I think podcasting might be the new late night. It's not that we have as many people watching, but we kind of do have as many people listening or watching. And this is where everybody now goes to get their celebrity interviews. And it's just too diluted and diluted. Yeah. And fractured. In order to come on these things, in order to get their press for their tours or whatever it is, we are getting a ton of this kind of stuff. And thank God for us, right? Thank God for the commercial break. Sad for Jimmy Kimmel, but I think Jimmy's doing.

I think he's going to be okay.

Do us a favor. Float us some of that money, and we'll let you take the guests on your own. Here's a good exchange, Jimmy. We'll give you the guests. We'll give you exclusivity. We will not have the same guests that you have on. If you could just give us, I don't know, what do we say? Any money that you make from the comedy club over and above the bills, like any profit you make, just send it over to the commercial break. It'll be a donation, a charitable donation that you can write off at the end of the year. How's that?

If you're going to incorporate as a 501 C three.

I think we are a 501, regardless of whether or not we incorporate. Somebody's got to take mercy on us. For sure. Somebody has to take mercy on us. But I love Lunell. I think she's great.

She's so fantastic. Her personality is just amazing.

Yeah. Go check out her socials at Lunell.

That's l u print Michael Jackson thing, too.

Oh, yeah.

Tattoos.

Yeah.

For some of the younger audience, they're going to be like, michael Jackson. What a fucking creep ball. I understand it's a complicated, muddy situation. And if you weren't alive when Michael was at the height of his powers and fame and musicality, then for you, this is an easy call to make. He's a creep who had some dealings with some children that were not above board and probably illegal and immoral. That doesn't take away, I don't think, some of the music that he left for us to listen to. It's hard to separate the man from the behaviors or the music from the behaviors sometimes, because I still do like some of those songs. Yeah. And Prince, forget about it. Prince was just a God. That's what he was. All his sex was consensual. I guarantee you that. How do I know that? I don't know that. I just like to think that, yeah.

There'S been no crazy stories coming out.

No. And you would think Prince being his fan. I mean, there are lots of crazy stories about Prince, but they don't have anything to do with inviting you over to ride roller coasters and spend the night with popcorn buckets, right?

Yeah.

Gross. I just. Think about it. It's just gross. Okay. Chrissy and I want you to be a part of the show. We would love to do some live. Ask TCBs right here on the show. You be a part of it. You come on and you tell us your story and ask us the question directly to our faces or through our ears. We would love that. But the only way we can get you on the show is if you text us and let us know you want to be on the show. That's the only way we can do this, because we record and see it at secret times and secret locations, which means mainly, we don't even know what our own schedule is, right? So from day to day, hour to hour, it changes. So in order to catch us, what you got to do is you got to text our hotline, let us know you want to be on the show. You got a question to ask? You need some advice? You got a life story you want to share? We take it all serious, funny in between. Whatever it is, let us know. 212-4333 tcB.

That's 212433 TCB. Text us that you have a story or you want to ask for our advice and give us a phone number that we can reach you at. And then we will communicate with you to coordinate and then look out for lots of changes because that's how our schedule happens. And then also, you can leave us a voicemail if you want to do. You can leave us a voicemail also on that same number. 212433 TCb. Toll free from anywhere in the world. Comments, questions, concerns. Ask Brian's mom. Mom will be back on in the next couple of weeks.

Here.

She's feeling better from her little injury, so I'm excited to have mom back in.

I can't wait.

Tcbpodcast.com. That's where you go. You find out more about Chrissy and I. You can read all the show notes, all the audio, all the video right there at one location. Tcbpodcast.com. Also, Piggy fronting stickers are still available, but they're going fast. So if you want one, go to the contact us button on the page or the contact us page. Hit the drop down menu. It'll say, I want my free sticker. Give us your address. We'll send you a sticker at the commercial break on Instagram, TCB, podcast on TikTok and YouTube.com. Slash the commercial break for all the interviews and videos right there at YouTube. Okay, Chrissy, that's all I can do today. Lunell has been so exciting. She exhausted me. But I love you.

I love you.

Best to you and best to you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy and I always say, we do say, and we must say goodbye.

Take a dick and keep on digging. Close.