My favorite action movies of a current day and age that we're in are the Fast and the Furious movies. Those are my favorite ones, arguably.

We know they're the dumbest ones out there.

They're dumb. They know they're dumb, and we know they're dumb. And we're still like, give them to me.

How dumb are.

The last one was called Fast X for Fast 10th.

There's twelve of them on this episode of the commercial break.

Kids birthdays love a good Paul Giamatti impersonator.

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. I was talking to my wife about our upcoming kids birthdays, and I was like, I don't know who we're gonna get. Spunky the clown chuckles. I'm not sure. And she was like, paul Giamatti, Brian, it's all the rage on TikTok. Have you seen the Kyle Kinane impression?

She's. Listen, Tawny's turning eight, and her favorite movie is sideways.

That's right.

So if we just could make this dream come true.

The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Oh, yeah, cats and kittens. Welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is my dear friend and the co host of this crappy podcast, Chris. Enjoy. Only best to you, chris bestie.

Bryan.

Best you out there in the podcast universe. Yes, we sure do think we're funny. All right, here we go. Cheesecake Factory, a podcast back online, TCb infomercial today with one of my personal faves, kyle Kinane. Are you excited? Okay. All right. Just making sure that you're still there with me.

Chrissy was like, I'll follow up with something else.

Chrissy was like, wait.

We have a good.

Love, kyle. His brand new special out on the 800 pound gorilla YouTube channel. It's called Dirt Nap. He's got a number of other specials hours of comedy out there that you can watch. You know him. Go to our YouTube page, YouTube.com thecommercialbreak, and you can watch us interview kyle kinane. You will know him instantly, probably just by his voice, because he was the voice of comedy central for a long time.

Did you know that? That's right. I was reading that.

There you go.

Look at you.

You're studying up. I'm proud of you, Chrissy. I'm proud of you.

Thank you. And I noticed that he was also too on the green. What is it? The big city green.

Big city greens is so hot right now.

I mean, we're. I'm. I'm so hot right now with my nephew, who's eight and loves that show, my. My kids loves me, I guess who I'm interviewing, you can't listen to the podcast, but for future, you can know.

Yeah, but I tell my kids this, too. I've interviewed these people. Like, Reggie was on a kid show. Reggie Watts was on a kid show that my kids. We've had a couple big city greens people in now, big city greens is all the rage. And if you have children, especially. Yeah, it is really funny. Wow. Disney Junior wasn't like this when I was a kid. I didn't even think Disney Junior was funny when I was a kid. Now I'm an adult, and we all think it's funny. They're really doing a great job over there. Big city greens. Check it out. But more importantly, 800 pound gorilla on YouTube, dirt nap is the brand new special. Kyle kanain.com dot. He will begin with us in just a few minutes. But before we do that, I do have to address one topic that you sent me. This is actually Chrissy sending me some content ideas, and I love it. Polycule.

Yeah, polycule.

We are finding out all about polycules. Polycule is the word mashed together. The word polyamorous and molecule mashed together to make polycule. How that has any relation to what it actually is, I have no idea. But, you know, whatever's good with you, it's fine. Fine, be fine.

But it sounds very complicated to me.

Oh, man, does it sound. I get a headache just thinking about it.

20 or more people that are in a polyamorous relationship, in some cases, a.

Lot of people in these. And the polycule is not like polyamory, where you have multiple consensual, non monogamous relationships or partners. It's where you all, like, multiple partners have partners. It's all a big. They call it. It's really actually hard to describe because they can't even describe.

Yeah, they say that in the article.

Yeah. They don't even know what it is.

It's like a community, and everybody's just loving.

Yeah. I mean, they describe it. They kind of like, one lady had a diagram, I think it was on Reddit or one of those things. They had a diagram, and she put it together and looked like a v, and she had, like, what they called the nesting couple, which is the original couple.

Starter couple.

Starter couple. There was a there. Some of these don't have hierarchies, but some do. And they had a hierarchy, and it.

Was all molecules are different.

All molecules are different. I mean, I just, like, this just blows my mind.

I know. It's pretty fascinating.

It just sounds like dicks and vaginas flying everywhere and everything in between. I don't even know, like the FedEx guy. Put the FedEx guy on the beat.

Yeah, yeah.

Hey, Fedex guy. Thanks for dropping off the package. Can you drop off your package in my wife's best friend's cousin. We're all part of a polycule. You don't mind if I videotape it, do you? I'm just gonna touch your ass a little bit. Is that okay with you? Okay, cool.

Yeah.

I don't get it, but I'm all about it.

Yeah.

Amen. I mean, that's way too adventurous for a guy like me. I mean. But I do. I appreciate in some. On some level, I appreciate what's going on in those polycube.

Yeah, exactly. No, I know. Like I said, each to their own.

Whatever works astronaut have been together for.

Work until it doesn't.

Yeah, it'll work until it doesn't. And I can guarantee that it probably doesn't work on a lot of levels. Like, there's probably a lot of infighting and arguments that go on. Don't you think?

I would think probably.

But, like, Astrid and I can't agree on anything for an entire day. How do these people agree on, you know, whose partner is going to be with who? And jealousy issues if you're in a polycule? I desperately want to talk to you. Desperately. Not to make fun. Not to poke fun.

No. Just to learn.

Yeah. I have genuine curiosity, and I would like to learn. So hit us up on the phone line because I'm just. I just love to talk to you for 15 minutes and you can try and explain exactly what this. What this is. Because when the New York fucking is times can't even give you a description, you know, that it's something way too complicated for everybody to think about it. Like what? Huh?

Right? I know. I didn't even get through the whole article because I was just confused after a little while.

Yeah. You know, there's. I find that a lot in life is that I can't even get through the whole article anymore. You know what I'm saying?

Yeah.

If it's, like, trump or biden, I can't even get through the whole article. I already feel upset and depressed. If it has anything to do. I mean, let's face it, we're inundated with a lot of information. Yeah.

Tons.

And polycules are inundated with penises and vaginas. And it's hard to really wrap your testes around exactly what's going on in a situation like that. So when the people in the polycule have a hard time describing what the polycule is, but they just say in this one particular article, 20 or more people involved in one big and growing or shrinking or whatever relationship where everyone kind of swings with everybody, heterosexuals, homosexuals, pansexuals, all kind of sexuals. The. All the sexual.

All the sexuals.

You. If they can do this right, then I will believe in communism. We can just go just be communists. We'll all just live in one big polycule and see how it works out. Right?

Yeah.

Am I right?

Yeah.

If you can figure out something as basic is not making your girlfriend or boyfriend jealous as you're having sex with the FedEx guy who just walked in the policule, you could figure out anything. I am sure of it. I'm going to ask Kyle about this. What do you think we should ask Kyle?

Yeah. He's got to take a stance.

He's got to take a stance. We can't let Kyle go without him falling on one side of the table or the other. As far as polycule is concerned, I say yay, polycule. But will Kyle say nay, polycule? I don't know.

We will.

See, we've got to ask him. Chrissy, I've got an idea, and I'm just gonna throw it by you.

Okay?

Why don't we take a break and then through the magic of podcastrin, then we'll just zoom him on in here. It's kind of like zoom. We'll zoom him on in here and he'll be able to talk with us and all the friendly people that are listening to the podcast.

Brian, I love that idea.

I thought you would. All right, we'll be back with kyle Kinane.

I know you're already on your phone, so pull up instagram and follow us at thecommercialbreak and then follow us on TikTok tcv broadcast.

Done.

Perfect. Thank you. Since you're at the ready, why not text us hello at 212433 tcb. Or if you've got some drama in your life, a little fun story or anything, really. We're desperate for content. Call and leave us a message at 212433 tcv. And don't forget to check out tcvpodcast.com because that's got it all. Speaking of having it all, let's listen to our fabulous sponsors and get back to the commercial break.

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And he's here with us now. Kyle, thank you very much for showing.

Up on the show.

Thank you for coming to our show.

You bet you. Yeah, I had to go all the way to my basement to be on your show.

Kyle. Kyle, you got your brand new special out, dirt nap on 800 pound gorilla on YouTube. I took some time, watched it last night. I got to tell you, as I already told you once before, but I'm going to repeat it so that the people who are listening can actually hear it. It's probably one of the best hours of comedy I've watched this year, and we do watch quite a bit of comedy for the show. But you're prolific, too. You just did another hour of comedy like a year ago, didn't you?

Yeah. Well, this hour, most of this hour and the last hour were all kind of came up together. They were all kind of. They were not necessarily about the pandemic, but it was just, I was writing a bunch of stuff. There's a lot of new things happening in life. And so I, you know, had a lot to pull from, so I just had a lot of material on deck. So put the 1 hour out last year, and this is the second hour of that writing spree I had over the pandemic.

So good. I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna try do your jokes or tell your, you know, quash your special. I gotta tell the audience, though. Ten of the funniest minutes of comedy of 2024. Is Kyle talking about the fast and furious franchise? Go watch it on YouTube. Okay. Inquiring minds want to know, where do you stand on the very controversial topic of polycules?

Polycules.

Polycules. Sounds like molecule or polyamorous, but no, we've put them together, and now they're a polycule. So I'm just wondering, where do you stand on this? It's very important that you take a stand.

Wait, it's a real. I mean, it's a lot of cules.

It's a lot of something.

So here's what a polycule is. A polycule is like polyamorous relationships, but it's many different relationships that come together as one. It's like a beehive of dicks and.

Vaginas, as I think, is how I interpret people.

20 plus people.

It seems very complicated getting together.

It's a sex thing.

Yeah, I guess. Or like a relationship thing. We just read about community. Yeah. Now we're stumped ourselves, actually, on how it works. It's like they're polyamorous, but instead of just, you know, having multiple girlfriends or multiple boyfriends, they have, like, multiple relate. Like, the FedEx guy could be involved. You never know. Like they have a big diagram. They put it together and they explain where people go and who you can have sex with.

So it's not, I mean, and I don't, I don't mean this disparaging, but it's just you're just kind of out whoring around.

Yeah, that's it.

I mean that with no shame. That is your choice.

We're good with that too.

It's just a fun. I like the term me too.

Polyculer for anything.

Anytime the cat wouldn't come home. Cat's out, whorn around.

That's right.

Yeah. I used to think that polyamorous meant it was, like, french for yourself. Your marriage isn't working. But now I understand that non monogamous, you know, non monogamous consensual relationships are a big deal.

Yeah.

And apparently, since the pandemic, when everybody opened their drawers, I've never.

Yeah. Anytime somebody's like, oh, yeah. We're like, in an open relationship, like, you're just not broken up yet, that's all.

Yeah.

Never. I've never seen one that's.

I know.

I don't think lasted long, you know?

No, we talk about it.

Why did they get married to begin with? I don't know. Do your thing.

I have friends that had the best of intentions with polyamorous relationships. Like, they really were, like, non monogamous. We love who we love. We're gonna do what we do. We can integrate. And three months later, they had divorce attorneys sending letters back and forth to each other and came off the brink only because they stopped having relationships with other people.

Yeah. Let me timeshare my love and affection and see how that works out. Much like regular timeshares, it ends in disaster. It ends in disaster for everybody involved. Nobody's happy. They tried it. It sounded great on paper.

It did, yep.

Have you ever had a timeshare?

No.

Yeah.

I've never had a threesome. I'm a real buy the book kind of fella.

How did you grow up? Did you grow up, like, I feel like you and I are twins. Cause you grew up just a short hour and a half drive from me, born just around six or seven months difference from me, and then also probably a different hospital completely. So in my mind, we're like twins.

Did.

Did you. Original. Yeah, original. You grew up in Addison, didn't you?

Yeah. Where's this? Hour and a half away. You're discussing Oak Forest.

Well, hour and a half, if you take the traffic. Oak Forest, which is down near Oak park and Oak lawn, all the oaks are together down there, just south of.

The cluster of Oaks.

The cluster of oaks, yeah. How did you grow up? Did you grow up in a particularly religious family or.

No, no. The kind of obligatory Catholicism that was pretty big in the area. Like, you're gonna. I didn't go to catholic school, but I didn't go to CCD, so. Sunday school.

Yeah, I went to that, too, but.

Then my parents didn't go. They would drop us off for CCD. Like, why are you going to church? Like, we already went. Like, we had to do this when we were younger. Now you gotta do it, and nobody's happy about it.

Are you kidding me? Wait, your parents would drop you off at CCD, but they wouldn't go to church at the same time. They'd be like, no, this is just something you gotta do on your own.

Yeah. They're like, this is your. We signed you up for this. You don't go. We went when we were younger. You gotta go. I don't think that's what church is about.

Yeah, listen, it's perfectly safe in there with all the priests. Don't worry about it.

Yeah, fine.

Young Kyle.

See you in 3 hours.

Yeah.

And then when did you. Did you go to college? Did you have the college experience? Chrissy and I were talking about several.

Oh, yeah. Really? Really, Goldilocks, the whole college experience. Just kind of try a few on. I went to college of DuPage Cod State out there in Glen Ellen, Glendale Heights. I loved. I loved. That was community college. I loved it. And I only went for a year. Cause I was like, well, if community college is great, regular college is gonna be even better. I made it about two months at UIC before I failed out.

Yeah. And then we said, yeah, like we knew Kyle was gonna fail out.

Yeah, of course you knew one of those. A dropout had to be in there somewhere. And then I went to Columbia for five years.

No, then you went to Columbia. You followed that up with Columbia?

Everybody follows it up with Columbia. Not New York. Columbia.

Oh, okay.

No, come on. You're from Chicago. No, the liberal arts. You don't need a high school diploma.

Columbia.

Columbia College Chicago.

If you goldilocks your college education. I don't even know what I call my college education. I showed up for a few classes and then decided that cocaine sounded much better than any classroom that I was in.

Yeah, that's the real ideas. Yeah, that's a real marketplace of ideas. To this bathroom with this cloth.

Technology in the future are right here on my nostrils, in my brain. We're gonna change the world right here. And tomorrow, all I'm gonna want is a bacon, egg and cheese sandwich and a nut.

I promise you, I got all the. You're not going to believe this, you guys, but I just found all the answers.

Exactly.

The string theory. I figured it out. It's a polycule.

They're in the bathroom at Medusa's. Yeah.

We were talking about. I was just talking with a friend of mine. We had Steve o on, and he was explaining to us that he did one night, he had, like, a five hour cocaine bender with Mike Tyson. And I was like, yeah, I still can't believe that. And I'm like, why would. Yeah. How was that? And he was like, oh, he's the sweetest, nicest guy. I think cocaine is such an anxiety inducing experience in the first place, at least at my age, it probably is that I would be so nervous to be stuck in a bathroom with Mike Tyson. All.

Yeah, I only see like a. Like a pit bull, like just a train fight. You just see one. One trigger that freaks him out and you're in a stall with them.

I know, right? Close space.

And he uses those fucking bricks to just pound your ass.

Is that fight still on?

Yeah, it is.

Oh, yeah, he's gonna. Yeah, he's got a. He's gotta fight the YouTube fella.

Yeah.

What's his name? Aaron Carter?

No, Jake Paul.

Honestly, it might be.

Yeah.

I don't know who out of that.

Group, but it's Jake Paul, right?

Yeah, I think so.

Jake Paul. I can't imagine. First of all, I can't imagine Paul Giamatti.

I don't even know.

If Paul Giamatti is going to fight Mike Tyson. This is insane. This is insane. I give Giamatti a one and a half chance. I saw his training videos. He's working for it. He is working real hard for it.

You know, they announced all Giamatti.

I don't think I can do it.

Get out of here. Get out of here.

Ty.

God, Mike, what do you want to do with this?

Mike, come on.

That's the worst impersonation of Paul Giamatti.

Anybody can ever see.

I know it, really, as I'm doing, I'm like, I don't know what he sounds like.

He sounds like that.

I've never tried to be Paul Giamatti in my life.

I don't know. You might have a career in it.

So, kids birthdays. Love a good Paul Giamatti impersonator.

Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah.

I was talking to my wife about our upcoming kids birthdays, and I was like, I don't know who we're gonna get. Spunky the clown. Chuckles I'm not sure. And she was like, paul Giamatti, Brian, it's all the rage on TikTok. Have you seen the Kyle Kinane impression?

She's. Listen, Tawny's turning eight and her favorite movie is sideways.

That's right.

So if we just could make this dream come true.

Her favorite movie is sideways. Cause it reminds me of mommy and.

Daddy and also my fictional child. And that joke was named Tawny for some reason. I don't know why you're down in.

The basement learning CZ top licks with your tawny cotain poster.

Yeah, it's the white snake. Yeah, yeah. Somebody had to keep those cars clean.

That's right, she did.

With her ample breasts, her ample bosoms.

Yeah. Writhe around. I wonder if David Coverdale was a polycule, you know?

I would think so.

You gotta imagine polycule started, like, all good things, probably in the glamrock days of the eighties. Were you like a glamrock. Were you like a glamrock guy when you were growing up?

I loved it. I was. I grew up on the back end of that and the beginning end of grunge.

Yeah, yeah, me too.

So I had to, like, bridge the. Yeah, bridge the gap. But I like the late eighties, like, hair metal scene. I loved it. Yeah.

Yeah. So let me ask you a question. So were you like, which hair metal bands were your favorite? Name one or two.

The first concert I ever went to was poison and warrant.

Holy shit.

Yeah.

The Rosemont. Oh, God.

Yeah, I liked. I still think Tesla's a respectable band.

I have to agree with you.

Yeah, they never went. They were just a good rock band. They didn't go like, crazy with the hair and makeup. Solid band. Went and saw them a couple years ago.

Yeah. So you. So when guns n roses comes out, I'm going to see if we have similar experiences when guns n roses come out and you're just a young Kyle kinane there in the suburbs of Chicago. What do you think about guns n roses? Like, blow your fucking mind.

I remember when guns and rose. So that was, I think, 1986, but then it was. It took a couple years for a sweet child of mine to really.

Yeah, I think, like 88 or something like that. Yeah.

And I remember. Oh, yeah, I remember that song play. I remember a kid that, like, I thought a kid that I thought was cool was in the parade. Like, the community days parade. He had a boombox on the float, and he has played sweet child vibe. Like, this guy can't even get any cooler.

And he got cooler.

I mean, he's already cool. He's in a parade.

And they let.

Him have a boombox, and he's just gonna play guns and roast. Coolest guy. I'm still, as I describe it now. Show me a cooler guy than that.

I just imagine, like, it's just the guys riding down the float parade, and all the parents are, like, screaming and covering the children's ears. The world is falling apart.

It may as well be. Yeah. This bad boy doesn't g an f about what people think of him.

Tipper Gore. Is that the.

I wound up buying the tape at Stratford Square mall, which is currently about to be destroyed. Oh, I follow some subreddits about the Chicago suburbs. Like, yeah, you never think of, like, a whole mall getting destroyed?

No.

Yeah.

Like, they're always, like, inside of it. There's always the functioning parts. And this is like, oh, no, they're gonna tear down small. But I bought the guns and roses cassette, and it had the parental advisory, and they let me buy it anyway. But I was at the mall with my mom. I was like, mom, check out what they sold to me. And she's like, it says, prince. I don't know if I should let you listen to this. I'm like, why? Bought it so there's nothing we could do. She didn't give a shit.

She didn't give a shit. My parents wouldn't let me get, like, when that big parental advisory thing came out, I remember my first two tapes. Beastie boys and run DMC are the first, like, tapes that I own. My parents got them for me for Christmas. But there was, like, something that I want, like Huey Lewis in the news or something. I wanted Huey Lewis in the news, and my mom said, what's that? Yeah, he was huge. Please, he's huge now. Yeah, a good Huey Lewis. A good Huey Lewis concert.

Only news I want to listen to.

That's right. So my mom said, mom, you know, Santa brought me or whatever. I don't even know if I knew that Santa was real or not at that time, but I'm like, hey, I didn't get the Huey Lewis in the news one. And she says, yeah, it's too adult for you. And I said, it's too adult for me. And then I had run DMC and Beastie boys as the two tapes that I did show up with, but I.

Think they met adult. Like, this is what adults. It's not like, mature maturity levels. Just like, you're too young to be, like, to turn into this guy.

You're too young for a free form jazz exploration. I'm sorry. It's just not huge. You don't watch public television.

Comes with a free copy of Turbotax. Like, oh, this is just. Yeah, quickest. That's just not gonna be fun for you. It's not gonna be enjoyable.

So how did you end up in Portland? We. Your wife's from there, right?

We define it. We let the spirits define it. Yeah, we were in LA. I was in LA for 17 years. That's where we met and were together. And then the pandemic happened, and we had a chance to. There's a house that, like her and her brothers co own that was gonna be empty for the time being. Like, right at the beginning of pandemics.

Yeah.

You wanna come up here and occupy this place? Like, yeah, yeah. Get out of a major city and have a yard.

Right.

A yard to drink beer in and just kick back while everything seems to crumble for a little while.

I mean, you talk about this on the special. You give it. You give it some time. But, yeah. One of the things I had a question about with the special is you say, you know, a. It's. I just felt like it was time to go back to the suburbs. Right. Chill out a little bit and, you.

Know, change the pace.

Yeah, change of pace, you know.

Yeah.

Go from, well, 4oz of coke to 3oz of coke a week. I get it. I'm on the same path.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's all down or something. The burbs. I gotta wake up early, work on this yard.

So do you. Go ahead. So what?

Oh, no. I was gonna say, yeah. I don't. It was more like we. The choice was not made for us, but like, oh, I'm going to go to the suburbs. Let me try and pivot and enjoy this slower pace, let me see if I could do it. And I had no. No problems.

Yeah, me neither. I did the same thing. But I have twelve children, so. Yeah, I have twelve children and they're all really young and it's hard.

You need acreage. You need acreage for twelve.

I got a little bit of acreage and I got a pool and a place to lock them away when I'm irritated with them. So I feel like that's the best.

Do you really have twelve or you'd be having me on. Listen, we started with polycule. I don't know what kind of weird.

Exactly.

So I don't know what kind of stuff you got down into, down in oak lawn or wherever you're from that amish country already. You already have like a bunch of kids and no zippers. I don't know what's going on down there. That's why they have all those kids. No zippers, nothing to keep the genitals in.

When we. When my wife and I were driving around. I'll tell you the story. When my wife and I, because everybody asked this, and I don't think I've ever said this on the show, but my wife and I were driving around and we see these stickers on the back of the car. Mom, stick figures. Mom, dad, you know, Kyle, Joel, whatever. They actually put the amount of children that they have, the sexes of the children, through the stick figures. And then some of them even have the names of the children on the bottom of them. And I'm like, how fucking ridiculous is that? Why would you that just broadcast that to the world. So when we got this show, I started fooling around. And every time I say how many children I have, it's a different number. And so no one really knows how many children I have. But the answer is three. I have three children. Okay, but they're all under five.

Seems like twelve.

Seems like twelve.

That's. Yeah, all under five. I do the stick figure people. I always wondered how dark you could make those. Like, if you had like the mom and dad and like two kids. And then just like a little tombstone, okay. Just like, just to see if you could mess with like how much you can mess with people. Like an abortion tally on there or something.

Not anymore, Kyle. Can't do it anymore. No more abortion.

Tawny, this is Toby. And this is a marker to remind me that I just wasn't ready. I was a freshman in college.

Just put little tombstones like mom, dad. Little tombstones. Sorry for all the drama.

Yeah, I had to get my degree first.

It was a long night at the sorority. Do you find. Do you find as you're getting older. I'm just asking a question because I think this is. You find as you're getting older that you talk more about the weather.

You know what? It's such an easy thing to bring up. That's not divisive.

True.

Yeah. True.

That is very true.

I didn't think about that.

I don't think I. You know what? I think I'm a bit from a family, that there's no such thing as dead air.

Ah.

So I think it is. That's where it comes into play.

When you talk about your mom on this latest special on dirt nap on YouTube, 800 pound gorilla. Go watch it now. When you talk about your mom, that and your dad, that's like a super for me scene to me, because my mom is the exact same way. And my dad used to tell her, you're going around your ass to get to your elbow. Tell the end of the story. Like he would tell her. He would be like, vicki, you're going around your ass to get to your elbow. Let's just wrap it up. But she would spend days on the phone with people and just yammering about what? And they were the neighbors. They were, like, right next to door and me, they would get together all the time. And yet my mom would find another 2 hours of conversation with them after they had already been talking for 2 hours. And so it's.

It's its own gift.

It really is.

Yeah, it really is. And now. Go ahead.

I was gonna say that my friend has a phrase. Instead of going around, ask it to your elbow, he goes, I asked you what time it. I asked you what time it is. Not how the watch works. That was his way.

That's his way of saying that.

And when my mom calls, I feel like. Like you do when mom calls, it's like, oh, God. I mean, Chrissy knows this. My mom will call and I'll be like, I gotta take 30 to 40 minutes. I'll be back in 2 hours. I don't even know when I'm gonna get out of this hole. I'm not even sure.

Yeah, yeah. And it's. I try to acknowledge that, like, oh, it's just somebody's got a lot of. They just. They built it all up and they're happy to talk to you.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So I try not to be. I try not to be rude sometimes. I find myself being rude sometimes. It's a gentle bumper bowling ourselves to the end and we were talking about this, and this was the subject we were reaching for here. But I know I wind up doing the same thing. Cause my girlfriend called me on it. Cause I like the special I did before. I talk about how my mom will just say these things that seemingly come out of nowhere. But then two weeks ago, I woke up. My girlfriend woke up. I was already up. And apparently the first thing I said is, like, so I've been putting a lot of thought into these barrel saunas. And that's the first thing she didn't know that I'd been laying awake for an hour and a half looking up barrel saunas on my phone, just waiting for her eyes to open. So I'd be like, anyway, I've come to a conclusion on the barrel saws.

I was looking into those things, too. They look pretty cool.

Yeah. It's not necessarily what you want to hear about when it's the first time you open your eyes to greet the day.

Good morning.

Yeah, this is. I know this is what you were dreaming about. Like, I wonder if Kyle's come up with a decision of a barrel song.

How does she call you out? Like, what is like, is she just like, hey, honey, honey, listen. It's too fucking early for the rambling. Just, like, put it away. Let me get a cup or a coffee. We'll get back to it.

Yeah. Or if it's. You know, if I've been on the phone with my mom or something, like, she just says stuff, and she'll just be like, well, yeah, barrel saunas. All right. Touche. Appreciate it. She's keeping me in check, and I value that.

Exactly.

Well, now I have a question. What is a barrel sauna? Because the actual barrel that you just, like, heat up.

It looks like a giant wine cask on its side.

Oh.

It'S a little door on the end. And you just sitting there and. Yep, it's a sauna. Yeah, I got real into them being in Portland, and we had a gym membership, or they're nice sauna. And the winters here are pretty gloomy. I can imagine it was like some sort of body warming effort. Hot tub or sauna. Probably going hot tub. Even though the other week I was.

Pretty stoked when I saw this.

Hot tub is just more. It just lends itself to that polycule lifestyle. I have really changed so much.

I'm picturing people with wine.

I've taken a stance. I've taken a stance as of late, and that is, I only want to go into a hot tub where I understand the chain of ownership, right? It's like kind of, I don't know, it's like DNA evidence inside of a courtroom. I want to know the chain of ownership, who owns it.

It's like a bitcoin validation.

I want to see your ether ledger. You get into. You get into bitcoin? No, no.

By the time somebody explained it to me, it was up and down and gone already. My buddy who knew about it 14 years ago or twelve years ago or whatever, I wish I would have listened to him.

Yeah, I know. It just seems too late now to figure it out.

My little brother had this kid that we grew up with. He was like, derelict would be a nice word to say, but he's a very nice human being. I think he means well, but I'm not sure all the cylinders fire. And so he would do stupid shit like, you know, take a pound of heroin from one state to another with a gun because someone told him to do it and make a $1,000.

You're like, he would do stupid shit. I'm like, oh, yeah, wacky hijinks. Pound of heroin.

I know, I didn't expect that.

Felony trafficking, okay?

Murder.

This crazy. This crazy ragamuffin and his hijinks.

I know he'll dispose of a body. I was like, what?

He's spying for the iranian government? That silly little guy. He's always up to something. And he would just get himself in these like, okay, criminal situations, whatever you want to call them, what they are, criminal situations. But, you know, he was dumb. He was just like. And I don't say dumb. I don't want to make the guy feel bad if he's listening, but he was just a little like, yeah, he couldn't really put all the things together sometimes. So he, yeah, he moves out to California, and then because he had a warrant in California, he runs down to one of the islands. I can't remember one of the Virgin Islands. And in the Virgin Islands he meets a guy who is setting up a server farm inside of one of the houses in this location where he lives, in this neighborhood where he lives. So they're at the pool or at the bar or whatever, and he says, hey, what are you doing? I see all those, you know, big boxes showing up at your house with all the electronics. He says, I'm mining bitcoin. And he goes, he's like, what the fuck is bitcoin?

This is years ago, because what the fuck is bitcoin? So he explains it, and then this guy, on the advice of his next door neighbor, whoever lives, wherever he lives, he says, you know, get yourself some of these servers and start mining, and I'll even front you the money for. You can give me whatever, 30% or whatever it is. So the guy is now, he sold a lot of that bitcoin. He got in very early. He sold a lot of that bitcoin, and he now never has to work another day in his life. I swear, if you would have looked at him 25 years ago, you would have been like, just pray he makes it. I just pray he makes it. He's not doing. He's doing stupid shit, and now he's not in a castle. Yeah, he's got a house there, and he's got a house here, and he's got a house.

What happened to the warrant?

He paid an attorney to go take care of it. He got my attorney. Cash money.

Money.

Took care of the warrant.

Money money.

But that's kind of awesome. But you think about, like it is the people that gamble or would take a risk on some wilder ideas that, you know, nine out of ten of them are foolish and don't work. But it's the fortune favors the bold kind of scenario where, yeah, everybody else just doing what you're supposed to do and not taking any risks. I wanted a piece of it way too late.

I, unfortunately, am not bold, so I take a lot of risks. But it's on the dumb side. I'm buy low, buy high low. That's right.

By low, lose proof that you own the shares in the first place. Forget about it. Call it a wash. I think that's how I go.

Yeah.

You know, I used to have Disney stock. My grandparent, my grandma would buy Disney stock for us for our birthdays and for our christmases for, like, I don't know, the first twelve years of my life, they would buy Disney stock. Buy Disney stock. And back then, you would get, like, a piece of paper in the mail and be like, hey, Disney stock shares. Can't for the life of me find that paper. Can't for the life of me find that paper. But I am almost sure that I would not be four episodes a week on this.

I was gonna say, man, I don't know, how much does. It might pay off like a new Nissan Sentra. I don't know what you got?

How much you got? Yeah, that's kind of what I got.

All right.

That's the level of podcast we are. Nissan. Nissan Sentra.

Damn, y'all can afford Nissan Sentra.

It's tough out here for a podcaster.

I know you're not. I only go once a week. I'm not buying Nissans, not getting Japanese made.

How long have you and your. Your girlfriend bed together?

We will be celebrating ten years in a few weeks.

Ah. Congratulations.

Congratulations, Kyle.

Ten years of avoiding marriage.

Do you really just feel like. Like, leave it up to whatever it's called? Is that kind of your take on it? Is like, we're together. We don't need to prove to anybody else. Have a piece of paper, none of that bullshit.

Yeah. You can't get divorced if you don't get married.

True.

Wow. What a really smart take on that. I wonder if I could take that to my wife.

Smart. I don't think that's. I think it's smart. I think it's. I just like the people that, like, you know, that somebody's gonna get divorced, and, you know, they want to just be married. It's like, just date somebody.

Yeah.

Just be with them. Why do you need the legality? Like, why do you love court so much?

I think a lot of people get stuck in their heads. It's like, yeah, we should break up, but instead, let's get engaged, because that's the next natural step. It's like, you know, you're dating, and then it becomes more serious, and you have that honeymoon period, and you're like, well, let's move in together. That'll be fun. We can do that and play house for a while, and then, you know, you get irritated with each other. You should go to therapy, but instead, you get a ring, and I just feel like that's. That's, like, the mistake that some people make. I know I made one like that.

You talking about your current marriage?

No, my current marriage is lovely, but I'm twice married, so my.

Okay.

Yeah, I just think we probably. Oh, you are?

No, for you.

For round two. Yeah, round. Round two. And I'm not doing another one. I'm way too old for that. My back will give out if I have to do another honeymoon night. You know what I. You know what I like about you, Kyle? You. And I don't know if I'm getting. If I get the right take. I'm about to analyze a little bit. I see you as, like, a. Like, a militant hippie. Like a hippie, but a guy who's got a real. Like. You got pointy edges, right? You. You have your opinions, and. And you try and, like, navigate the world in a kind and aware way. Uh, but if something was to make you upset, you'd. You'd let people know. Am I getting that right?

Yeah, I try to. My first, my, I wish. With the exception of road rage. I don't know. This isn't. I'll get. I get angry about stuff, and it's never like, at the end of the day, me going, yeah. And I was right. It's always like, remember how you just yelled like that in the car for no reason? You let these things take away your happiness.

Yeah.

You let one turn signalless driver eat up 4 hours of your day. So, yeah, it's, it's. I just, you know, it's a, it's an ongoing quest to not leave behind a worse place than you found it. You know the campground rules, so I guess that's pretty hippie.

Yeah, leave it.

Leave it cleaner than you found it.

I really do appreciate that attitude, though. Cause I think that the world could use a little bit more of it. And I don't know, you come across as, like, a real nice, self aware guy who also happens to be fucking lame.

No, I guess I could be a dick. I know I can be a real dick. I think that's. I think that's the whole, that's the engine of all the comedy.

Yeah.

Is we like, with comedy, every comedian gets to, like, paint the picture, whoever they, whoever they want to be to the audience. And it's the ones that, like, I don't agree with anybody that comes out as the hero when they're telling their own story.

Ah.

I only like comedians that come out like piece of shit, and I was a fool and I did this wrong. Like, that's what I like. Like, that's more honest to me.

Yeah, I think I'm with you. Like, I resonate more with self effacing people who can look at themselves and, like, you know, they can be the butt of their own joke and braggadocious. And we have experienced this just on the show ourselves. We've had a number of comics on, and I just think the ones, there's a few that came out, you know, with. I don't know how to say this name.

Come on. The commercial break. Progressive time. Well, there was a Hollywood minute.

Well, I'm telling you what. Joan Rivers was an asshole. I'm just saying that Joan Rivers was an asshole. So there you go. I speak ill of the dead, but sometimes you can just tell, like, you know, they, they have a hard time fitting the head on the screen. But then there's people, I think, who can laugh at themselves and are self aware about it, like, you know, and I think that to me is I can relate to that more than someone who just comes out and bloviates for an hour.

Yeah. I'm the only subject that I'm qualified dissecting.

Yeah, that's fair enough.

I'm, this is the only thing I'm an expert in. It's being who I am. I'm not an expert on anything else, so I can't talk about stuff. And you should do it like this. And this is how the world should be.

Where did you first develop your love for comedy? Or, you know, just to want to try this out?

I was my, I used to go, I always say was like, I saw it on the Tonight Show, Johnny Carson. First I saw stand up, and then I had cable. We had cable tv at an early age. There's, like, all, like, the late night specials that were on, and so I was watching. I didn't even know what. I didn't even know where you did it real. I thought it existed only in television. Like a tv show?

Yeah.

Like, I didn't know there was stand up comedy clubs. I'm a little kid. I don't know about nightclubs.

Yeah.

And then they're like, well, there's these people there. And there was a comedy club that was not far from my house growing up. I just remember asking what the building was. I don't think they had it painted outside, like, comedy club. And I asked my parents, like, what the comedy club. Like, I know what comedy is like, oh, people just go in there and laugh. I'm like, what a stupid sounding building. I honestly thought it'd be like, instead of a dance club, people were just like, like, it still doesn't make sense. It wasn't explained that there was somebody in there telling jokes to make the people laugh. A bunch of maniacs were packed into a place, laughing in each other's faces. Like, all right, well, it's music. You dance to music, so you laugh at a comic club, I guess.

I don't know.

So I still have to get a real good idea how that stuff worked.

I'll take a nitrous oxide on ice, please.

Yeah, yeah. It's just a bunch of giggling idiots over in that room on the side of the highway. So then I found out, you know, I obviously learned that, you know, zanies and there's the other comedy clubs and read in a newspaper. When I was working, I would work at a gas station to read all the newspapers that came in for that day. And there's one, like, open casting call for some comedy festival in Zanys downtown, like, well, you're on college number three and you work in a gas station and you deliver pizzas. Maybe you gotta get over yourself and try out some of these dreams that you had. Cause nothing else you're doing is looking great.

You're a fifth year Columbia student. You got everything going for you.

Fifth year. That seven year total on college. If we keep it track. They made me graduate Columbus. Like, you took enough credits. You're getting a bachelor's degree. I don't want one. Cause then I just have to leave here and get a job and then everything's just gonna suck for the rest of my life. I graduated. I just moved to LA. I'm like, I may as well have a shit life out on the coast.

I could see the student advisor. Kyle, your time's up here, my friend. As much as we love you, you've.

Been in college for seven years. Years. You were gonna get one of these. I'll fail class. Just watch me.

I'll start all over. Let me start all over.

Yeah, I'm changing majors. It doesn't matter.

You're getting a bachelor's degree. In what? We don't know. But you're leaving this campus.

Yeah, it really was like general studies or some shit.

Was it general studies? Is that what that it was.

It was set like with a focus on creative writing, but it was just a real. The most Columbia college bachelor degree you could get. Yeah, the most liberal arts bachelor degree.

It's fucking funny. Wait, so like, Zanies was your first? Did you just decide, hey, I'm gonna go give this a shot. Why not?

I did that. I did that open mic or that, that showcase they were having for a festival. And it was like there was comics that drove in from all over the midwest to trial for what would wind up being that comedy arts festival. Us comedy arts festival in Aspen, which was a very big HBO. Yeah. Which I wound up going to and bombing spectacularly in 2007.

So did you really like, like, it was just a miserable day on stage.

I just didn't do well. It wasn't. Yeah, I think I got drunk, felt the pressure. I just didn't do well. Yeah, and that would. That would have been eight years, but. So, yeah, so I did that. Zane, then at Columbia, I saw a guy that I saw at the zanies thing and I'm like, so you do comedy in town. This is pre Internet, or at least pre me knowing what the Internet. And he's like, oh yeah, you go like the Chicago reader. And here's a list of open mics, and you go to these, you sign up. And he told me what to, like, where to go. And so once I started going, I started, I went to open mics for, like, I think, three or four months. I just went and watched before trying because, yeah, like, I'm not gonna be the funniest one here, but I always looked for who was the least funniest.

Yeah.

And then saw that they would come back week after week, and I'm like, that's the, like, that's the most courageous person here. If that person can be that unfunny and come back every time, then I can do, I can do it, too, because I'm not competitive for the top. I just need to, to see that I might not be the worst to get me to try something.

Yeah, you're so right about that. Like, first of all, never done stand up comedy, so I give all the, like, I just think there's a lot of respect and going out there and walking that razor's edge every time. You just never know what you're gonna get.

There's not a lot of respect.

Well, you're getting some for me.

I'll tell you.

But it's like that seven foot walk to the microphone. I mean, do you still get that anxiety, those nerves? Does it still feel like there's a rush going out there on stage?

Yeah, there's, I mean, especially when it's like, okay, here's new material. Or I want to try and, like, you get locked in, like, oh, this kind of works. And you can get a little tone deaf to if it's really working or if, like, oh, I have the cadence of a joke. I said it in the form of a joke and people laughed. But did they laugh cause it was funny or they're laughing cause, like, oh, here's the rhythm of the evening that we're in.

Yeah.

And so I can find myself going, oh, here's the hour that I have planned, and I'm kinda going through the motions on it. Everybody's laughing where they're supposed to, but I'm not feeling it. So then that's when it's like, ooh, we gotta change it up. We gotta start with a different joke. We gotta do that. And then you're still a little nervous and excited to. Yeah, it's still unpredictable. That's what's awesome about it. It's still unpredictable. I still bomb.

Do you really, though? Do you like, really bomb?

I think a lot of us comedians do that, you know, just to try stuff out. We were talking with Margaret Cho, and I know I've heard Amy Schumer say she bombs, too and does stuff around in LA. And that's how you figure it out, you know?

Yeah. It doesn't feel good. And then if you are doing well, you get a little bit of a rippy. If you do well enough in common, like, oh, this person's funny because people know you, but then it absolutely don't get to bomb. Yeah. If nobody knows you and you bomb, they forgot about it. Oh, if somebody that they know, that's why Portland's great. Like, Portland, I just get to practice and, you know, eat it in front of people and then. But they know. They know what kind of show they came to.

Yeah. You. They understand that generally your batting average is pretty good. But it's fun to get out there and work on things, and sometimes things hit and sometimes things miss.

If it's a free show, I'll mess around. People paid to be there. I don't want to go goofing around when somebody paid some money to see some comedy.

Kyle Kinnane does free shows in Portland.

Let's get.

I know I want airline tickets. How many times a week are you doing? Do you do.

I mean, it's like I was in town last weekend, so I had a spot Friday and Saturday, but there are spots, you know, 15 minutes, 20 minutes here, there.

Yeah.

Once I'm on the road so much that I'm not really clamoring for stage time. Here in Portland.

Yeah.

So once or twice every couple weeks, I'd say. But if I'm home, if I'm gonna be home for a stretch, then I'm hanging around at the shows if they need anybody. But right now, I'm gone every weekend doing comedy. So when I come home for the few days between, I'm kind of just chilling out.

Yeah.

So this is a question I ask a lot of folks. Cause I'm really generally curious. Is that, do you still, do you enjoy the traveling part of it, or is it just like, that's part of the job? I'm just, I'm going in, I'm going to see a hotel room, I'm hanging out at the club, and, you know.

I'll be, yeah, I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say enjoys the word, but I'm not bothered by. I know people are like, oh, you gotta go to the airport and fly every weekend. Like, I just, I don't know how you can do that. Like, I don't know how somebody sits in a car for at sometimes over 2 hours.

Oh, yeah.

A day. Every 10 hours.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Like, I don't know how you do that to go and are you going to a job that you like?

Right, probably.

I'm going to the thing. Yeah, I'm going to the thing. I'm going to the place where my childhood dream came true. So any little bump in the road to get me to do comedy, I'm like, hey, you remember what you're doing this weekend? Remember that? You're going to go tell jokes for a living? Yeah, maybe we're not so bothered about the middle seat right now.

Where do you go and do you try and just a minutia question. Do you schedule around the weekends, or does that just happen to be when the shows can get sold? The weekends are the times to do the shows.

Yeah, I mean, that's how. So for a long time, I would, I would travel like a band.

Yeah.

I would try and be like, well, put me, I'll go to the southeast for two weeks and then let me just do a different city every night like a band does.

Yeah.

And that guy, you know, I got to play a lot of weird smaller towns, and that's, I got built up a good, like, kind of grassroots following from doing that early on.

Yeah.

And then because, you know, early on, they'll try and book you in a comedy club. Well, comedy clubs are, you know, the 300, 200, 5300 seats, 250 on the smaller side.

Yeah.

Some of these clubs like 400 seats, and you're doing five shows in there.

Geez.

Wow.

So that's, you know, there's your 2000 tickets.

Yeah.

And that's, if nobody knows you and you're selling 30 tickets or something, it doesn't feel real good when you're looking at 30 seats and a 400 seater sensors, like, well, why don't I sell 30 tickets at some weird improv theater that I'll come through and do on a Tuesday night, and then Wednesday I'll do the same thing in another city 3 hours away, and so on and so on. Yeah, but I did that enough that, okay, now I got a following, which is cool. And I can actually sell these tickets at the comedy clubs. In comedy clubs, traditionally, they're like Thursday through Saturday or Friday through Sunday now, because that's when people go, that's their night out.

Yeah.

And comedy clubs have really, I think, come a long way from even the 20 some years I've been doing comedy. They're kind of like they were, they all kind of collectively up their game for the most part, and not the kind of like corny money laundering spots. Comedy clubs. Not to say I don't know what they're doing behind the doors in these offices, but they're, you know, yeah, you get decent food, you get, you know, I went to see a buddy the other night, and me and my friend were both commenting. Cause in the darkness of the comedy club, you see a server holding a tray, like, it looks like, you know, 18 pint glasses full on, and they're moving in the dark right in between and operating quietly, and it's crammed together. It's not like a restaurant where it's basically like, that is. Those are like Green Berets to me. Or servers in comedy clubs. They're like SEal team six to me.

Yeah, I think you're right about that. It's like, when I go to the comedy clubs, I also have taken note of how stealthy they are. The service staff are.

Oh, yeah, just SR 71 swooping in with, like, how much, how much weight is that? I never worked in a restaurant, so I never know. And that's what gives me anxiety. I'll go on stage in front of 400 people with new jokes. It's fine, but don't make me bring drinks to them. Cause then you got drunks, like, oh, that one's mine, I'll help. And they don't realize it's balance and everything. I just panic. Even on stage when you see it, I will panic. Cause I'll see the tray going through. I'm like, oh, my God, please be careful. That takes my attention away from my own, for sure. So tip those people when you go to a comedy club.

Yeah, God bless. I mean, amen for sure. I went, who was it that I went? I went, saw Pete Davidson was like, working on material, right? And so he went to this smaller club a little bit outside of Atlanta at the world's nicest place, right? But it was a place, and they had, you know, places packed. There's probably 200 people in the room. And it's like person to person, back to back, butt to butt, nut to butt. And they have these 12, 13, 14 service members who are just like, going through the crowd taking orders, because that's where these clubs, in a lot of cases, make their money. They have to. They want to sell food, they want to sell drinks. And this girl has a tray of, I don't know, wine and something, and she spills it. And what I think would even in a restaurant take away attention. Like, everybody would turn and go, oh, that happened.

Yeah.

The way in which her and the staff just kind of got together real quick, cleaned it up and were gone. It was almost as if no one even heard that. This glass just broke in the middle of the opener's set. And I was like, wow, these are really good. And then, you know, you think that people are, like, leaving a dollar with some change on the table, and I'm like, come on, guys. You at least order $20 worth of food. Give the guy a five. Give the girl a five. Please stop that.

Yeah, I think the gratuities worked in, as it should be built in for the. But those, yeah, they're just. That brings me that. Oh, I hold my breath. I'm on stage. I hold my breath when I see the lights catching a full train. I mean, it's comedy. Clubs are restaurants. I work in a restaurant every weekend.

Yeah, that's true.

Yeah, that's what it is. I mean, we could try and make it seem like, oh, it's art, man. What a truth to the people. I am a component in a restaurant.

You were the entertainment. You were there to keep them there longer so they make them in a good spirit, so they drink and eat. That's one way to do it.

I am there to move units.

Yes. Move those moz sticks just like anybody in a polycule is just reminding everybody. We're bringing it back to polycule.

Any comedian with an ego, just remember, you help sell chicken fingers. Calm down. Calm down.

I love it.

Tell me more about how you're a philosopher.

Oh, man, he's got the number. I think he knows what I'm talking about. I think he knows who I'm talking about.

Philosophize me some spinach dip while you're at it.

Conjure up some honey mustard.

Yeah.

Kylekinain.com is where you can go to buy tickets to. There's also a link to his brand new special, dirt nap on the 800 pound gorilla channel of YouTube. Kyle, personal favorite. I've really enjoyed your comedy for a while, and I think you're doing God's work out there.

Thanks. That was my intent, was to do God's work.

Hey, I think we're just here to help.

I mean, it's not obvious, but I am trying to spread the word of the Lord.

That's right.

Real quick. Cause this is a question you should just answer real quick. What is your take on, like, God spirituality? Are you like a I believe in God kind of guy? Not believe in God. Real quick. No, I'm kidding.

Real quick.

Don't worry about it. I'm just kidding.

Hey, Jesus is all right with me. Yeah, I don't know. I'm still. I'm still in the fun stage of just taking mushrooms. And there you go, being, like, trying to be all right with whatever somebody else's interpretation is.

Yeah.

You know, I think it's gonna be God's gonna turn out to be math, and I'm bad at math.

Yeah, me, too. Yeah.

Much like math. I don't get it, but it's keeping things together, so.

Right.

That's true.

Right on. Somebody's putting these equations together to make sure the sky doesn't fall. Okay, then.

Right on. Keep on taking those mushrooms. Oh, and I read somewhere or heard somewhere somewhere that you did ayahuasca, too.

I did not.

You did not do ayahuasca?

No, I was tied. I was talking with another podcast Neil Brennan does.

Yeah. Okay.

People are taking that and they're quitting the booze.

Yeah.

Doing all kinds of stuff.

Yeah, that's God's work right there. Ayahuasca? Yeah.

I mean, I've. I've thrown up off of plenty of drinks. I don't need to do it again.

And trust me, it's ayahuasca. It's not like a. Being drunk. It's not a bad hangover. It's like death a million times over. So.

Isn't that the point? Have you done it?

Have you? Yeah.

What, did you. Did your life change?

Yes. I would share with you that. It certainly did. And that's why you got divorced. That's why, yeah.

Actually.

Here'S a funny thing. So I go to. Go to do ayahuasca at this ceremony. It's funny to me. Maybe not to my ex wife, but I go to this ceremony and, you know, we're. We're there, and we're supposed. We're doing this like it's a three day retreat. And so the first day, it's a lot of meditation and all this other stuff, getting ready for the ceremony, like, with a shaman. And we go outside and the facilitator is like, listen, go outside, stare at the trees, connect with earth, whatever you do, just you don't. Don't smoke cigarettes, don't talk to each other, because we're trying to stay in this little bubble of our own headspace. But this guy who I know comes over and he looks at me and he goes, where's your fiance? And I said, oh, this is not for her. This is not her type of thing. Right. She's not coming to this? And he goes, mmm, interesting. And I said, why is that interesting? And he goes, well, I just don't think the two of you belong together. I think you should think about that on your journey. And I was like, oh, okay.

Thanks for. I'm not even kidding. I still know this guy to this day. And in that journey, he was right. I mean, at the end of the day, the guy was right. He was right. But that ayahuasca experience, just. It's hard to explain. And I know a lot of people will say this. It's hard to explain, but it's like you can see the molecules around you and how they all intertwine, and then you also die a thousand deaths. And that death and birth process just can give you a. I mean, if it doesn't change, you're a better man than I am, I guess. But it certainly changed me, for sure. But there is a lot of throwing up and yelling and screaming and, you.

Know, sweating and people, which it could be any weekend. So why not have a transformative experience on top of it?

That's right. Listen, and Zanys on Saturday, Ayahuasca on Sunday, back in Portland by Monday.

Listen, if I'm gonna cry and shit myself, I better be a better person for it after the fact.

That's right.

If I have to bring extra underwear for this journey, it better do something for me.

I just don't wanna. I'm not getting kicked out of IHOP for no reason this time, you know?

Kyle, can. I know. Thank you so much for joining us here.

Thank you, guys.

It was a good time. It was fun.

You know, we say this a lot, and. But we actually mean it this time. I would love to have you back because. Yeah. I would love to have you back. I think there's lots more to talk about. We could have fun. So will you.

We just got to the ayahuasca thing.

Important part. So we would love to have you back, and I will make sure that that happens if you're agreeable to it.

I would love to. I owe. I'm years overdue for an Atlanta visit.

Nice.

Oh, and if you come to Atlanta, come on in.

We'll slide up.

Yeah. Do you. Have you been to Atlanta recently or on this tour or.

No, no, I'm. It's just if for no reason. Atlanta is always great. It just didn't. Didn't put together on this, this year's bookings. I was playing variety playhouses, where I would play.

Yeah, that's a great.

Yeah.

Love it.

Yeah, that's a great room down a little. Five points.

But I'll be long overdue, and I love Atlanta.

So nice.

We'll come back, and when you come, I'll buy you dinner, ayahuasca, and you can come in the studio and hang out with us. If you're gonna throw up, throw up with a friend. You know what I'm saying?

Let's roll the cameras. You know?

Let's make it count.

If you're not getting the view, if you're not getting the views on it, why are you even doing it?

Yeah. Content.

Well, I see these videos on Instagram now of people doing the Ayahuasca ceremony, like, down in Costa Rica or, you know, where at Columbia, wherever they are. And it's like, you know, a hundred white people, hippies from the United States, all freaking out on a back porch somewhere. And of course they're filming it for Instagram. It's like, Jesus. Yeah.

Yeah. Nothing says ego death like and subscribe.

That's right. Yeah. So thanks, Kyle. We appreciate it. Thank you for joining us.

Thank you, guys.

What? Oh, hi, it's christina again, here to remind you to go to tcbpodcast.com for all things audio, video, and tcbedio. Give us a follow on Instagram, hecommercialbreak, and on TikTokcbpodcast. And guess what we have a new phone number. I know what you're thinking, but I promise this is the last TCb phone number you will ever have to remember. So call us and leave us a voicemail or text us at 212433 tCb. Once more for the people in the back, that's 212433 TCb. Oh, and check out our YouTube channel@YouTube.com, thecommercialbreak. That's all for now. Let's listen to our sponsors and get.

Back to the show. Well, there you have it. We got our answer on the policules from. From kyle. He says yay to polycule, but not for him. That's what it is. And I say yay. Yay. That's double yay. Kyle's stance on it. Not for me. I'm too small of a person to get involved in such a big situation.

You know what I'm saying?

I got my hands full over here. What am I gonna do? Like, I need to get be getting more people pregnant. Speaking of pregnancy here, all these people getting pregnant, pregnant on week over.

Uh, yeah, I did those in big stuff.

The ozobi those. Yeah. I'm concerned for a few of my friends. I mean, I don't know, but I don't know. Babies in the mix. I don't know if baby's the thing they want to do, but you never know. You might. You might pop out a we go v kid.

And that's.

That's something we should all pay attention to as far as I'm concerned. I never asked Kyle about we govee, which I'm, or Ozempic, which I meant to ask him about.

Yeah.

Why? I don't know, but I just felt like it. Kyle's looking slim and trim in his new special. He looks good. Like, he looks, you know, healthy and he has got that beard. I like the beard. I think the beard does him good.

Yeah, he's got, like, the Portland look going on.

Yeah. I guess when you live in Portland, it kind of soaks into you, huh? I think it's hard to live in a place like Portland and not let it rub off on you a little bit. Yeah, it's like living in San Francisco or New York or Miami. If you're living in Miami, you're gonna get. You're gonna feel a little Latino or Latina when you leave. Right. If you're living in New York, you're gonna have a little bit of an edge. You live in Chicago, all of a sudden you're eating hot dogs and pizza that's way too big. If you live in Portland, you know, you get a little crunchy. And I'm not opposed to that. I mean, as we discuss, ayahuasca and Portland go like peanut butter and jelly, you know what I'm saying? I think if Kyle really wants to do it, he can probably find someone who can conjure him up some ayahuasca.

I think so.

So let me repeat, just for those of you who have not heard it yet or who are not paying attention when I said it, pay attention, class. Let's go. Kylekinain.com is where you find out more information about all of his show dates that are coming, and he's got quite a few going through May and June. You can go to 800 pound gorilla, the channel on YouTube, watch lots of great comedy. But right there, right in the front right now is his brand new special called Dirt Nap. It is well worth the hour and twelve minutes, I promise you. It's fucking. I know I said this to him, but I got to tell the audience one more time. You got to watch the twelve minutes fast and furious. And then he goes in on his mom. It's just. It's hilarious. You gotta watch that and then file Kyle on Instagram. And all that good stuff. You can, by the way, you can watch that special and find all that other information on his website, kylekinain.com. I really appreciate that he came in here last minute.

Yeah, it was a lot of fun.

And what a great guy. And put him on the backlist. He's coming back.

He's coming back.

Now you'll know who we don't enjoy interviewing when we don't ask them to come back. Or you can go back and listen and figure out who we didn't enjoy interviewing. No, I'm kidding. We enjoyed.

We've loved everybody for sure. I've had fun at all of them.

I have. In my own little way, each of them has been an adventure in and of its own.

Exactly.

You know what I'm saying? You never do know. You never know.

A lot of times they're one way on stage and then, you know, interviewing them maybe a little different than he thought, but that's good.

Yeah. As Neil Brennan said in his new Netflix special, which I hope you've watched by now, but if you haven't, go watch it. Neil Brennan said, you don't want Kevin Hart to be humble. You don't want your basketball stars to be, you know, choir boys. That's not, it's not what they're built for. They're built for speed and destruction and or comedy, as it turns out, you know, or acting or whatever. So there you go.

It's been fun.

Yeah, it's been fun. So Kyle Kanain.com, he's on the backlist. Let's do this. Let's tell the audience how they can find out more information about us, which is more important. Tcvpodcast.com, that's where you go. You find out more information about the show. All of our tour dates are up there, too. All of them. Every one of them. If there's a tour date in the future, it's gonna be on the website. Just know that you can watch all the video. You can listen to all the audio, or TCB. TCB, as Christina likes to say. You can hit the contact us button for your free TCB sticker. All you got to do is hit the contact us button. Drop down menu. I want my sticker. Give us your address away. It will go, you'll have in a couple of weeks or months or however long it takes to get to you. We want you on the show. To talk to us, please dial 212433. TCB 212-43-3822 text us. Let us know what you want to talk about. Ask TCB. You need our advice. You have a question, comment, concern, whatever it is. If you want to be on the show, we'll get you on the show.

But you got to text me or text somebody and let them know. Let them know at the commercial break on Instagram, TCB podcast on TikTok and YouTube.com. What? Chrissy, the commercial break. All of our interviews up there in selected episodes. We sure do hope you give us a subscribe. Oh, right. Chrissy. I know that's all I can do for today.

I think so.

But I'll tell you that I love you. I'll say best to you, best to you out there in the podcast universe. And that includes Kyle Kanane. Much appreciated. Until next time. We always say, we do say we must say goodbye.

Goodbye.

J.

Our.