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Draftkings Network. This is the Dan Leviton Show.

With the Stugartz Podcast.

For more than a couple of weeks now, Jessica has been talking about this lemonade that is killing people. And for some reason, somebody around here today, I don't know whether it was a meme or Lucy, somebody said that this claim by Jessica that has been validated. Someone died because of… Is it Panera? Is that the company that is making the lemonade? Someone died. And what has happened since is the dangerous taboo of the liquid death that isn't the water that is liquid death. That is, liquid death now makes it more appetizing because it's a dangerous drink. I don't understand what's happening there. Now there are people around here who want to taste the deadly lemonade.

I'm so happy Lucy is here now, and Charlotte, obviously. But Lucy is reading the same memes as me on the Twitter for you page. And this Penera Lemonade has caffeine in it, but does not really advertise that it has caffeine in it. It has so much caffeine in it that people are drinking it without realizing that it actually may be bad for their health. And so now two people have died after drinking the lemonade and they're suing Penera. And instead of this being like, Oh, my God, this is tragic. This corporation didn't label their drink well, it's just turned into a meme where everyone's like, I want to drink the lemonade. That kills you.

This is basically turned into the Tide pods fiasco of a few years ago, where kids were eating Tidepods because they were like, Oh, it's funny. It's a TikTok trend. People are now doing the Penera Lemonade challenge where you go drink Penara lemonade and see if you die.

I was going to say, and some adults.

Eating the Tidepods.

They were delicious. Well, they were really tasty. They were really tasty. They were delicious.

Is this the Chris Cody theory of no pub is bad pub. Even if you're a lemonade, if you're a.

Lemonade, this is not good. This is not good.

People are dying, Dan. This makes me want to go nowhere near Penara. Really? I mean.

The lemonade is killing people. I love Penara. I still want to go there, but I don't want to try the lemonade. Don't? Why would you guys want to try something that might.

Kill you? I just have a lot of questions here. First of all, why is there caffeine and lemonade? Second of all, why is there so much caffeine and lemonade that people are dying? What?

And what has happened to us mentally that we're like, This is the funniest? People are having a ball. And I feel so terrible for these two families because if you read the stories of what happened to these people, it is genuinely horrifying. If this happened to one of your family members or someone you knew, you would be mortified. It's so tragic. But it is just everything now that is sad or weird just is instantly memeified.

I'm going to walk the dangerous line here.

Oh, boy.

You go into Penara, right? Yeah, I'll get asandwich. He wants some chips on the salad.

Half-sandwich soup. Half-sandwich, half soup, maybe a bag of chips.

Bread bowl, broccoli, and Chedda.

I'm a little thirsty, I'm a little parched. Where should I have the drink? Let's see you guys. We have sodas, we have ice tea, we've got lemonade. We got our charged lemonade. Give me the charged one. Why are you going for the charged lemonade? They have regular lemonade. They have.

Regular lemonade. That's what I'm talking about. I choose the one that's going to kill you. Well, here's why. -you got to smoke cigarettes. -good point.

No, he doesn't try that, though.

There's a warning label. He lives in it.

Well, that's the thing.

Not trying to.

There should be a.

Warning label on this lemonade. He is not trying. He is succeeding in.

Smoking cigarette. I also feel like charged lemonade, you could be like, Oh, it's probably like fruit punch.

-or it has vitamins in it or-I'm sorry. -you should.

Label as this limitate.

Could kill you. This is.

Like the for loco without the alcohol is what I'm getting.

Yes, but here's a crazy thing, right? There's a scene in the movie. Don't be a menace to South Central while drinking your juice in the hood, where they- Wordy. Yes, it's a great title. Foul. Foul as well. They roll up a joint. Well, first guy takes a hit, starts coughing. Coughing harder. Harder than he's convulsing. He's fraughthing at the mouth. He keels over and like a cockroach with his legs up, his eyes. And everyone stares at him. And then they look at the weeds and, Pass that shit over here. That's the exact vibe I get, which is, This lemonadeate is so caffeine. It killed two people. Oh, my God. I'm ready for that wild ride. Do you remember that day I had the Cuban coffee, but I had a cup as opposed to a little thing, and then I started freaking out? That's what I think that lemonade must be like. We should.

Get some right now. This makes me want some Cuban coffee. Fuettez, make.

Some Cuban coffee. And some Pinara, too.

I think for legal purposes, we should state that we are not accusing Panera explicitly of contributing to the deaths of these two people. However, there appears to be a link, and we are stating that there has been lawsuits filed. Kicks even a meme. And a meme has been created. Don't sue me, sue Dan.

Jessica Smetana, Esquire.

I am a bit confused. I'm not a huge Panera bread fan. Shocking. But if there were anything that were killing people, I would not be interested in trying my hand at that. When you told me I thought it- Roll the dice. I thought it was one person. Now you're telling me it's two. Did those people have previous heart problems? Is it linked to something that.

Is-you're saying there might be a different connection point with the two, not just the lemonade?

Well, it's close to God's.

I think you're right. I think you're onto something.

I don't think that Penara would continue to sell its lemonade if it thought that there was a link between caffeine so charged that it kills people and making a drink more popular because people are talking about it and it's dangerous.

Maybe it's charge because of the murder charge that goes along with it. That's why it's called charge.

All right, hold on just a second here. Just aJust.

Wait, hold.

On a second.

I like stew being like, No, I agree with you. I would watch a detective show where stew was the main detective. True detective.

Two seconds. No, it.

Can't be true.

True.

Detective. I would take these two people and figure out what else they have in common. What else did they do on the same day?

You can't be true detective. Thank you. We got there. Stop it, guys.

You can't be true detective. You can't spell manslaughter without man's laughter.

So I know for a fact that the first girl who passed away, she did have an undiscovered heart issue. So I don't think it's like, everyday people are just, well, they shouldn't probably be drinking this lemonade because.

It's like 300-She didn't know, allegedly, she didn't know I had caffeine in it. And same with the other guy. Neither of them were like, Oh, I'm purposely drinking 300 milligrams of caffeine right now. So that is why they're suing Penera, because they're like, There should be a warning label, like on cigarettes. Were they vaccinated? It's dangerous.

The thing that has surprised me recently that I cannot understand. I was at a restaurant that served Mascall, and I was ordering a drink. And on the menu, I did not have my glasses on. And this is where I discovered the very simple water of liquid death. I discovered it in a can, and I've been told by friends of mine that it tastes differently, especially the flavored ones. But as a concept, I found just confusing both advertising something as liquid death, then having it be water. And I also don't ever want to drink water out of a can. To me, it doesn't taste the same as it does out of bottles. And so I would think water in a can tastes worse, but I'd be wrong, evidently, because liquid death is very popular. And I was wondering, is that marketing that's making it popular? Or is it actually taste?

So liquid death is very popular because of the marketing strategy. So it was put together for the idea of being water for punks. It's mainly for the comm-no, listen, it's mainly for the community of people who they are sober, but they are going out to bars, and they don't want to hold a bottle of water at a bar. If you're holding a can, people aren't going to bother you as much. -people aren't going to know you're drinking water. -love schooler. Yeah. It's all marketing, and it's been unbelievably successful.

But it's also made to look purposefully, I would imagine, as an energy drink as well, one of the popular cans that looks like an energy drink of some sort. But the water itself, when I was drinking it, it did not taste to me like water usually takes when I drink it out of a bottle. It didn't taste better. I would say it wasn't even that it tasted worse. I just preferred the other experience of not drinking from something that's aluminum or metallic. I didn't like it. And so I'm asking you, you think it's marketed to both people who don't want to look like they're not drinking liquor and also want to look cool because I don't believe anyone looks at anyone drinking a bottle of much of anything and says that person is cooler than I thought they were before they were holding that.

You don't have an Instagram. You don't get Instagram esthetic. Like, liquid death is for like, it's for the look of it. It's a huge popular thing where people are a liquid death for Instagram. You don't get it. I don't.

Get it. Out of touch, Dan Levitar.

You don't have an esthetic on Instagram, Dan. I'm with you. I'm-let's put.

Together- I take no insult from what it is that you're saying. You're correct. I don't drink my water to look cool on the gram. That is a correct appraisal by you.

Because.

I'm thirsty.

I would like to go back to something, though. You say you don't like water out of a can. What about a can of Seltzer? You know where you buy those boxes? I love a polar Seltzer in a can, La Croix.

Would you like that in a plastic.

Bottle, though? We're saying a lot of.

Brand names right now, folks. Actually, well, for seltzer, I prefer either the can.

Or the big bottle. No, Dan prefers his drinks with a side of unrecyclable plastic is what he's saying. Oh, a cardboard box.

She is right. Well, she's got me on that one.

Evil, out-of-touch.

Dan Levitard. She has got me on that one. I don't often drink out of bottled water, but-.

But when I do.

But when I do, I kill the environment. I'm Dan Levitard, moral hypocrite, telling you how to behave while drinking my riches.

You hate the environment, you don't have an esthetic, you don't have an Instagram. What else can we get him for in this segment, Lucy?

Well, you can get me in trouble by all the sponsors that.

Were naming.

You're going to get sued by Penara.

This is what Dan's car sounds like.

It's a rich person's horn right there.

Yeah, a hooga. It sure is.

I'm just wrong? I am wrong. Liquid Death is the future. Liquid Death is cool. No one objects to the idea of something being called Liquid Death as we talk about a lemonade that is actual Liquid Death.

We.

Think. It's all water and salsa. It's not.

Killing anyone else. I don't even like club soda out of a can. All I drink usually is sparkling water. I try to drink sparkling water. Small bottle. No, I don't drink it out of bottles. Really? No, I try- Big.

Question here. Is there a difference between sparkling water and club soda?

Yes. Yeah.

What?

Yeah. What is it? Minerals.

No.

Minerals.

Are you kidding me? No. This is blowing my world has been turned upside down. So when I say, Can I have a seltzer? Or when I say, Can I have a club soda? They're not going to bring me the same thing?

No.

I'm not talking tonic water.

If you ask for Seltzer, you'll get Seltzer.

If you ask for club.

Soda, you'll get club soda. What's club soda? Is it the.

Same button on the little thingy?

You know what I'm talking about? Put it on the poll at Labitard show, is seltzer the same thing as club soda? Because I thought the same thing that you did. You're not alone here, Charlotte. Ameen is looking like a real expert on this, but I believe he's bluffing. I don't believe he knows anything. What's that? I'm calling your blood. Look, this is a poker game right here. Everyone has backed off. Let's see. Hold on a second.

I'm standing strongly.

With Ameen. Let's see. Thank you.

I don't know if he's telling the truth or not, but I used to work at a restaurant, and I'm realizing I definitely did not give people what they asked for if Ameen is telling the truth.

Right now. Oh, my God. You people.

A mean is right.

There it is.

A mean is right. There are minerals in one and not in the other.

Oh, my God.

That'd be a lesson.

For you. I fold.

Don Levitard.

We like to call this one a chorus of Owen Wilson. Ready? Stugats. Wow. Wow.

Wow. Wow. Wow.

Wow. This is the Don Levitard Show. With these two guts. I would like for us to start doing a segment where we present either a Miami thing or a Florida thing to Charlotte, to Lucy, or to Jessica. Although Jessica is now discovering more and more Florida things that are no longer new to her, but I want to have a segment where we are introducing Miami things or Florida things to Charlotte and to Lucy. Do you want to explain, Jessica, to either Charlotte or Lucy what Yee-haw Junction is? Jessica was scared. This was you discovering Yee-haw Junction? It's hell.

It's so scary. It's so... Carrie, Yee-haw Junction is where you end up if you forget to get off the turnpike when you're going north up to Florida. Oh, yeah.

It's a swampy area. People don't understand that we're all built on marshland out here. And once upon a time, you couldn't go out certain parts out west out here. There wasn't development. But Yee-haw Junction felt to you underdeveloped, correct?

It was just like I was like, Where am I right now? We were on the turnpike going north, and we were supposed to get off at Fort pierce, I think, where the turnpike and 95 intersect, missed the exit, ended up way going out west. We're heading towards Orlando now. We don't want to go towards Orlando. We're scared. We can't get off for another 80 miles. The next exit, Yee-haw Junction, we get off at Yeeha Junction. Why is it called Yeeha Junction? I Googled it. There's a Wikipedia page. I don't remember the answer, but I read all about it. And there's a gas station there. And then you just have to go west and all... There's just horses and just an empty country road all the way back to '95. We are in the middle of nowhere.

I've lived my entire life, and I've never been to Yeha Junction. To me, it's something you pass on your way to Orlando.

Is Yeha Junction a town? I have an old timey village in my head of like - Village? Yeah, where you can go in there, reenactments of like, here's what it was like. I think there's.

Like a mobile there. An old old.

Trading post. Post. Doors. Or someplace like a video game called Yeeha Yeeha and you build your own Western saloon. But But it's town? Yeah.

It's like an interchange off of the the and it's just literally in the middle of nowhere. South Florida is so weird. So when you're in Miami, you're in Miami. And then as soon as you cross into Broward, you're in Florida. The street signs look different. Everything just feels different. And then you're in South Florida for another, I don't know, 60, 70 miles. And then you're just just in.

Then you get to Boca, you're like, What's going on here? Yes, Yes, yes.

Then.

You're just moving along.

The Coast. Everything changes. It's just everything changes. It's weird. And then there's this section of Florida where you're just like, like this is not what you picture when you think of Florida. There's no beach. You're in the middle of the state. There's just flat swamp and nothing for miles.

Well, you described it for those who did not hear it. You said there's a gas station and then just Marsh. You mentioned the gas station. And I'd have to think, can you get me a population or any information on on Junction? Because I do not think of it as a town. I think of it as a junction. I think of it as something that is is.

Just- has a zip code, man.

But I want want to how many people live in this area because it doesn't feel as you're traveling through it like there's a lot of life there.

Here's a thought. Top five junctions that you've been to.

Apache Junction.

Okay. That's a good one. I'm seeing as of 2020, I.

Can't think of another junction at the moment.

240 people. As of 2020, 244 people.

Small town, Dana.

Not a town. That's the line at the bathroom at the gas station. It's tiny. It's this this weird, and just this big interchange and there's trucks everywhere and swamp all around you. It's very strange.

It's not a town. It's technically a census-designated place or a CDP.

When you look it up, the second question it asks is, What was the experiment at Yeeha Junction?

Oh.

Oh, boy. Oh, boy.

It's.

Warfare. Wait a minute. We're not looking at the experiment. We're looking at a famous landmark or the landmark in Yeeha Junction. The only landmark.

Yeah, that's the motel.

No, that's not a landmark. That's it.

That's Yeeha Junction.

Are you if that food is good?

It's good. It says it on.

The sign. It says Good Food Bar.

They would never false.

Advertise there. Catchy name. It's the Desert Inn Motel. It should be Marsh. It is not desert. It's just deserted.

Looks like six rooms.

This reminds me of a place in Maine, in this town in the middle of the state, well, close to like an hour from the the Coast, store is called Husseys General Store.

Husseys? Husseys.

John Husseys. And the sign, as you drive up, it says, We sell wedding gowns, guns, cold cold beer. By golly, if they don't, you can buy all three of those things on the same floor. Floor.

And have.

A wedding gown. They have one wedding gown there that that is the the veil is piped in camo, and there's a camo belt. Maine also has territories. The farther up you go, it'll just be like TR-90. I feel like there's some similarities between the remote parts of the the country, even if separated by many miles.

There it it Husseys.

Can you guys tell me, please, what this experiment? The answer to the experiment is, is, I'd like to know.

It's an incredible general store also. If you have a chance to go, I highly recommend it.

I love a good general store I do. They have everything. It's like a one-stop shop and they have the old-school candy. That's what I love most. If you want want go to a.

General store.

Saltwater.

Saltwater Do you have for me, please, some more information on this this Yee-haw junction, and what is... You You said second question that comes up up what was the experiment that left us with Yee-haw Junction?

I think they conducted an experiment. It said a biological warfare experiment was conducted there that was supposed to determine the effectiveness of some chemical against wheat crops in time of war. This doesn't seem like a place you should probably be going and breathing in the air.

This experiment was part of Project 112 and was labeled DTC Test Test Sternrust, referred to as Agent TX, was tested to determine its effectiveness against against wheat crop time of war, as Lucy just said. The tests were conducted over a period of one month from October 31st to December first, 1968. Live agent was sprayed by US Air Force McDonnell Douglas F-4 Phantom Fights on seven occasions.

Video has told me that the landmark that used to be be Yee-haw Junction that we just showed you has now been destroyed. Oh, that's too bad. It was destroyed by one of the many trucks that flies through there not not to stop at any point in Yee-haw Junction. These are the trucks that come between Miami and Orlando carrying God knows what.

Just to be clear, clear, there no more good food or or bar.

Good food, no no motel, is gone. It's a damn shame. That is a giant truck that has gone through the side of the building.

Husseys is.

Still alive. I was going to say Husseys General Store is okay, right?

I.

Don't know. Are you sure?

Husseys, Husseys, it's all gas, It's a gas station where you you get a wedding gown, gown, beer- And razzles. -and and razzles, and.

Saltwater tax. Also, fishing supplies, and basically anything anything The The.

Junction doesn't have any of this.

Right. This is an elevated situation, I suppose. Suppose.

Charlotte, do you think if we asked the people at Husseys, they could tell us? Have you had any customers come in and said, One of each, each.

A cold beer, a wedding dress, and a.

Gun, and razzles. I wrote about this place when I worked at Boston. Com a million years ago, and I went and I was more focused on do people actually buy wedding dresses at all. What?

Yeah, because- There.

Oh, there. There.

Oh, no. It doesn't seem like the experiment you want. Even if you're pro guns, it doesn't seem like the experience you want to be be like- Why not? Do you you why not?

You go there, you crack open a cold one. They show you the different gowns that they have. This one has camo on the piping. While you're doing that, you can also take a a look at AR-15s or or.

They don't sell those. Oh, no? It's hunting rifles. Is everything you need for shotgun wedding?

There you go. Hey. Do you ever mess around and get in trouble? No, don't worry. We got everything here. You can't have a cold beer, though. Only the groom.

Look at the grim right now on- You know.

What a shotgun wedding is?

Look at the grim on Chris Cody's face there. The last time that I saw him look, you're not someone who is just delighted on your face all the time. But you told me the other day that someone had done something in sports that you considered sweet. You You were looking... Looked like a little boy.

He loves sweets, I mean.

He does like like You looked.

Like a little.

Boy gazing at the television, smiling because something, was it in football that happened? Something cute happened in the middle of all the carnage, where you were just delighted and you were a little little just so pure, delighted by sweetness in sport.

Yes, I saw a player help his teammate with his pad, the shoulder pad thing. I was like, Oh. It got me thinking, Where in sports do we go? So I wrote down a few.

There you go. You got a list.

Oh, wow. In football, when they take the grass out of.

Someone else's helmet. A legal pad? You have a legal pad? Because you're the.

Executive executive I didn't want to be looking at my phone, so I wrote it down. In football, it's the fixing of the shoulder pad or the taking the grass out of someone's helmet. Like, Oh, you don't see this is here. Let me get this for you.

How about if you help another guy up, like a posing.

Posing Yeah, yeah. I love that.

That's soft. That's not sweet. That's soft.

Mj would never.

In baseball, when the manager is walking out to do a pitching change, he does a little clap right before he takes the ball. Just a little, Hey. So cute. Hey, good job, job, buddy. Job well Good job, man. Even though it wasn't your day, little clap. That's always cute.

I don't know if I.

Awe of that, though. I have something better in baseball, though. What's that? That? Steps in the the box, gives the catcher a little tap on the knee pad. Hey, good to see you. Hey, how have you been? How's the family?

Love that. I don't think many of those are all that sweet, though.

In golf, when the caddy is like the the player about to hit and there's a little noise, Hey, quiet, please.

That's not sweet at all.

That is sweet. That is not.

An odd moment, though.

That is an odd moment. I am defending my golfer. Isn't that his job? My golfer needs quiet right now. Hey, quiet, please.

The aw sound that I make is, Oh, come on, man. Just golf. Golf.

Is that hard? Setting is something that you find sweet.

Telling a gallery to be quiet.

I like someone looking out for their guy.

He's jingling keys over there. Stop jingling the keys. He needs to concentrate.

Get out of here. In hockey, whenever they do a a to service thing, all the players, they tap on the ice with.

Their their Oh, I do.

Like that.

Goose bumps. I love the hockey.

Stick tap. I'm not going to lie. Or when they're on the railing, right?

Yes. Really good though. I'm struggling in basketball to find anything. I think basketball, just like like the high fives.

Sometimes I'm like, This is nice. Isn't all the slapping of fives after free throws, after missing free throws? After making.

Free free I like when the guy comes from the behind the three-point line, taps the guy in the butt.

It doesn't even see it coming. You know what I like? I like the the pulse mingling of everybody.

Where they cover their mouths.

That is my favorite part. I love when guys on opposing teams hug each other. Yeah.

Last night I was at Heat Hornets, and there's a bunch of Hornets after the game game were hugging each other. I always like to wonder, do you guys know each other at all? I think, who is this? I saw Cody, Martin, hug, Jamal Cain. I'm like, Do you guys know each other? Or is it it just-.

Think there's a random hug? -you think they don't know each other?

Yeah, I think sometimes it's just like a guy you've seen around like, What's up, man? Respect.

For a hug? Yeah. That's all a moment. I try to hug you around here all the time and.

You.

Slither away from me.

I don't like it. Shake hands around here. Yeah, exactly. Roy gives you a firm handshake.

That's what I like. I try to hug you and you're you're just like physical and symbolic sandpaper.

Don.

Libertard. All of us who were watching college football elevated everything the weekend was because we missed football in general so very much.

You didn't watch the ending of U-Tep Jacksonville State.

It was awesome. A dizzy. Dizzy. Boom.

Stugats. It's a lane for you. Just everything in college football is awesome. Any single thing thing that she gets deliriously happy about. Don't you miss viewing sports.

Through.

That.

Prism, though?

I'm envious.

Of Lucy.

I wish that I could still be happy. This is the Dan Levator Show with the.

The Lucy, the moment we've all been waiting for, the reveal of our new name. Should we reveal our new name?

We don't have the graphic for it, but we promised people at the watch party we'd tell them this week.

A lot of people were chanting foot at us. We did not like it. We said we are done done with officially. Stop chanting that at us. Do not yell. Let me see your feet at us while we're on stage. I hated that. At the wash along. Mike Ryan, you will burn in hell for your sins.

We will never say the F.

Word again. Never.

The worst four letter F word I can think of.

How do you feel about our new name? I like it. You like it?

I wish we would have... This was a suggestion from Mike Mike and we probably should have taken it earlier.

I think we considered it, but we were like, like, something better will hit hit and then nothing better hit us. So we were like, like, was a solid choice all along.

We were basically like Jim Harball with the NFL NFL We were like, We're going to play the field, see what comes in. Oh, it wasn't what I thought.

Let's go to Michigan. Do you like the new name, Taylor? Do you know what it is?

I love it. You love it? Yeah, Mike Mike Juent pitched it to me early on.

All right. Right. How do we want to do I'll count you down. I'll do like a drum roll. Ready. Five, four, three, two, one.

Welcome to Jenns C-F-B. And (coughing) boom! If we had a graphic, it would have popped up. Right now, we're looking looking so cool. So many. So many. If you're watching on video, close your eyes, audio people, imagine it.

Angel is working on it right now. He's been very busy making T-shirts and stuff for the the store.

He's been been We.

Have a new name. It's Gen, C-F-B. I think it's great. Like, generation, not like Jennifer. Important distinction because you can't see it written out. So I thought I'd share that.

G-e-n-c-f-b. Is it one word or two? I I think.

It's two. I think we're two maybe all caps. Caps. Yeah. It doesn't.

Acknowledge that we're women at all. I think that's pretty sick. I think that.

Was what we were looking for all along. I like that. We don't have a lot to.

Talk about today. We do.

I didn't even realize until one second before we were typing this that currently it's December 14th, which means that there's bowl games in less than whatever, 12 hours from when you're listening to this, because this comes out a little bit after we record it. Lucy, I haven't made my picks yet. I'm excited. I'm nervous. I'm scared. There's seven bowl games before our next segment, which is when I was like, Oh, we should do our bowl game recap then. No, that's too late. We should have done it now, but we didn't.

I had to do my my pick yesterday, and it was a nice, swift kick in the ass from a friend. It was like, Hey, you need to get this done. You're late. Because I noticed it for the first time last year, because normally you'll start off the bowl season decently soon, but it's like some group of five schools. Not that group of five schools aren't awesome, and and they the best, and we love them. But we don't really start seeing some of the bigger names until later in December.

Like after the first weekend sometimes. Yeah.

But we've got a UCLA, Boise State game, I believe on Saturday.

The L. A.

A.

The Rock Ball. Yeah. We've got so many opt-outs, so many people in the portal, so many coaches that have left. Ucla's defensive coordinator is gone. Their quarterback is gone. One of their quarterbacks, I should say. A bunch of their starters are out. And then Boise States' coach got fired a month ago, and they have a new coach. It's so confusing. I don't know how people make picks for bowl games anymore, including myself.

It's hard. It was so tough. Tough. It was so It's a shameless plug. Someone bought a cameo for me, and you can do that if you want to give your your.

- on cameo?

Yeah, the weirdest Christmas gift you can imagine. One were like, I don't know who that is. And they were like, We want you to introduce our our bull pickups, help us.

With the That's a great idea. Help us go through.

The picks. And I went through and I was like, Brother, I don't know. They're opting out. They're opting out. They're opting out. It doesn't mean we love it less. I like it because it's a cute little preview for next season. You see somebody who's like, Oh, they haven't played much, but they'll be a starter next year. But yeah, tough to do ball.

Pickups these days. There is a running tally on... I think Action Network has one right now with all of the opt outs and all of the players that have gone in the portal and all the coaches that have left from each team. It doesn't really make it any easier because it's like, like, this team's backup quarterback is is and this team's third-string quarterback is playing. Good luck. You're just guessing regardless based on... And a few of them, the spreads spreads are huge, maybe you just pick a favorite in that case. That's a good strategy, I suppose, but you just don't know. A lot of it's like conference vibes. It's all vibes. Team Team vibes who's going to be excited to play in this? Who's not? Just go with the vibes. That's my advice if you're doing a bull-pick-them-this-year.

You got to look and be like, Who's feeling the cheesiest out of these guys? Guys?

Cheese, cheese, cheese, cheese!

Nc.

Okay, so there is a ton of stuff that happened this last weekend. You went to the Army-Navy game. I did. You thought it was interesting.

It was a very fun game. It was probably not a game that I enjoyed as much as the other people. I didn't have any attachment to either team, and it didn't really feel like the type of game where I could pick a side and switch and do that fun little thing. Definitely, that wouldn't have worked well. Well. So it was No one in my family has served. I certainly haven't served. I mean, look at me.

You are serving all the time, girl.

Thank you. But it's an awesome experience. Experience. You're CFP. If you are a big, if you're really patriotic and if you love football, if you enjoy the pageantry and the traditions of college football, then it's a game you should go go to. The singing of the songs at the end of the game, the prisoner swap, all the flyovers, all the parachute, it's really an awesome environment. Just tailgating-wise, it wasn't the best for content, but it doesn't-No one wanted to talk to you. You. It doesn't mean it was bad. It just means that those people represent our our and then probably being drunk on camera isn't a good idea.

It literally just means more. More.

Yeah, just means way more. And the game itself, it was weird. That's what I expected. It was weird. It was odd. For the regular season of College football to end with a safety, it was like Kirk Farrant threw it up himself, man.

It was beautiful. It was perfect. Speaking of your buddy, they posted the Iowa offensive coordinator position on the internet for people to apply to. So someone should apply for Lucy on her behalf.

Yeah. So I will not be applying because if you put a list of the people that Iowa fans dislike the most, I think if you did number one, it might be me, and then number two might.

Be Brian. No, Lucy. Just like some weird people online. Everyone loves Lucy.

I'm not going to apply.

For that job. I love Lucy.

People are like, Why are you posting this? You haven't found a a person. You know, a The only name that's been floated around right now, Scott Frost and Pat McAfee reported reported it. I'm choosing to believe it's fake because I don't.

Want to believe it's fake. I liked your Paul Christ.

Paul Christ, I've also heard that one. Both of them make sense because both of them, for real? Real? So have to to post job because it is a public university job. So get in your applications now, get in your jokes. If the last guy is any measure of what the qualification is, just write your dad's name.

I was going to ask you, what do you think is the ideal candidate other than son.

Of Kirk? Son-in-law? Maybe? Nephew? I don't know. There's a lot of relatives you could choose for. I don't know if he has a brother. I don't know.

Well, the other thing that happened this this other than... I watched a a little bit the FCS playoffs. They're very fun to watch. Right now, the semifinal is going on probably right after you listen to this. But the Heisman show was on Saturday night. And I have to say, probably the first time maybe in my life I didn't watch it because I just... I watched the show a lot, and the show is very very long, I'm like, I don't know if I need to watch the show. I just will find out via ESPN notification who won. But that's not to discredit Jaden Jaden Daniels, I thought was a very deserving Heisman winner. He finished the season with 3,800 passing yards, over 1,000 rushing yards, 50 total touchdowns, and only four interceptions. Leading this LSU team to a nine and three record, which probably you think like, Okay, little lackluster for a Heisman quarterback to not be in the playoff conversation late in the season. But he won some big games for LSU, and I don't think he's the reason that they lost any of those games. Games.

No, is a great tweet. I don't want to take credit for it, but I can't remember who wrote it right now. And it was about how Jaden Daniels had photos of himself in his jacket, doing the Heisman pose, and then how Michael Michael Pinnocks had the teammates. And they were like, Well, Jaden Jaden teammates, Scott, he's not going to put the defense in there. What did they do? Not my tweet. I wish I could remember who wrote it because it was so funny. Jaden Daniels had served the Heisman. That was the right choice. He had an electric electric It's just, hey, you didn't have the supporting cast. We've seen it before. The only real... I watched it, and it's like, Why do you tune in before 8:53? I don't know why you would do that. The only moment that I liked was when Bo Nicks' mom was subtly talking shit about Auburn. And I was like, like, Yeah. Yeah, sister. Let it all out. She was like, It was like he actually got to go to college when he went to Oregon. I was like, like, Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, Love it. Yeah, the Heisman awards ceremony just doesn't really feel as flashy and fun anymore.

I watched the the College football ceremony the night before. They got to do something to make that more fun. Boy, they got to do something to make that more fun. That was like, Oh, God. I think.

The thing that was interesting about all the finalists this year, except for Marvin Harrison Jr, is all three quarterbacks are transfers, and all of them in their second year with new new teams. All, for the most part, had good seasons last last year, then this season, I thought all were deserving of being there as finalists. Absolutely. That's an interesting thing. Not that transferring isn't a new thing thing in football, even though we act like it it Baker Mayfield was a transfer. Justin Fields was a transfer. This has been happening for a while, especially at the quarterback position. But I think it is notable that three of the best quarterbacks this year were all guys who... I think, especially like Bowen Nicks' case, really struggled with his first choice. And so he had the opportunity to leave and go somewhere else and Excel there. And it's cool to see people in that position have a second chance to pick a better fit or go somewhere where they they are to have more success. Like, Michael Michael went to Indiana. He was electric at.

Indiana for a while. Oh, yeah. That 2020 year was crazy.

He made Tom Allen a lot of money. And he was super fun to watch, but had injuries. And there was a ceiling at Indiana with Tom Allen. I think maybe they think that could be higher now that they've made some new hires with that program. But he wasn't going to make it to the playoff with Indiana when he was there. But he goes to a place like like Washington, Cailan Deboard is a coach that, yeah, they got a couple of guys in the portal, but they're also really good at recruiting. He's really good at developing developing talent. It was just like the perfect fit for Michael Michael So I thought he was also a super deserving candidate. I don't know. I really like the Heisman. I'm not one of those people who's like, Oh, this is so stupid. This is just ceremonial, blah, blah, blah. Of course it is. That's like all of college football. I do think it should be an award that takes place after the national championship, though.

It absolutely should. Christian McAfrey will always be my answer for like, like, it should happen after pool games. Games. Like, on, be so serious right now.

Yeah. Dashawn and Watson Watson my answer for that, but that.

Didn't age well. Who? I've never heard of him. Yeah, the the Heisman, it's what college football It's what call it for a while. It's pumpous. God, I really wish that they would just, Hey, don't tune in until this time. Don't tell me me to today. It doesn't.

Start today. When they were announcing the playoff finalists, I was like, All right, the show starts at 12:00. Just tell me when you're going to put the final four on. Because it was 12:30 when that happened. I could have spent that 30 minutes not sitting, watching people just talk about stuff I've already heard every week for the last eight weeks.

And like, where was the explanation of why Iowa Punner, Tori Taylor wasn't there? They didn't talk about anybody else who wasn't in the conversation.

Unanimous all-American.

I think, Iowa, Notre Dame, we retired from most. Shouted us.

Joe Joe Alt and Xavier from Notre Dame. Cooper-d-jane. Cooper-d-jane. First time all Americans.

Wow. -toy Taylor. -look at Look at us! Look at us! Better than everybody else. Else. Everyone on the playoff?

We're going to be back with with another segment of GenCFB.

This this.

I like that little little air thing. Thank you. But also it was like.

A dog. Yeah, Yeah, it's trying to more like a dog. That was Georgia fans after. It was in Alabama. It was was awere so like.

Oh.

Don Don Lou Lou number one. I can't tell you. I tripping my bones off. I can't get to know. Play a little touch of gray. You cannot give me enough enough Lou Holt saying any any number Tripping my my off.

You can't give me enough. Stugats. Jewel on the microphone. I'm not sure what you're doing. I'm trying to get on a.

Pacifier.

To avoid eating my own face. This is The Don Levator Show with the Stugats. Speaking of.

Espn shows and analysts and people that talk on them, Kirk Herb Street was the main character on Twitter this week because he posted a a dissertation the college football playoff, Lucy, and he was getting made fun for it.

It was like nothing he said. Was that particularly crazy? I mean, I didn't read it at first because this man, it was very clearly like, I got PTSD, flashbacks. Flashbacks. So I was in college and I got dumped, I was like, Oh, I don't want to go to the. I'm going to go to the the I'm going to write this. I'm going to get get to the.

I'm going to tell.

Everyone how I feel. He went to the the and typed out just this giant Michigan manifesto about why he thought... Or not even why he thought Alabama was better than Florida State, but just.

Why he-Is that what it was about? Because I'm going to be honest. I didn't read the whole thing either, which is why I think we should do a little bit of performance art here where we read this long-ass tweet back and forth, line by line, alternating for the next 10 minutes, because I think that actually might be how long it takes.

It's very important that we do this before we start little context. This was in response to a Florida State fan who tweeted something mean at him. This Florida State fan had 30 followers. So that was really really nice the.

Tweet was a reply to a picture of Kirk Herb.

Street's dog. He was having a day, and we all have them. There are days where I want.

To do this. Okay, so now for the dramatic reading of Kirk Herb Street's very long long.

I wish we could turn.

The lights down. Yes, please give us some mood lighting for the next eight and a half minutes. This is going to take a while. I hope people are ready. This is an audiobook. This Counts is reading a book this week, if you listen to this. This. Do you want to do the honors?

Okay, ready. We'll go sentence by sentence, I'll start off. Because Alabama is better. Period. So is Texas.

So is Michigan.

So is Washington.

So is Oregon. So is Georgia. I watched 10-15 games a week live from September, early December.

I think I'm allowed to have an opinion on who I think is better.

If If F. S. Doesn't like it fits this form, tell the conference commissioners to change the protocol to most deserving.

Until then, I and everyone else is certainly... I don't know if that's that's grammar Okay, sorry. Sorry. Of it is. Is. Until then, I everyone else certainly is allowed to give an opinion in a subjective discussion.

Don't like it? Change it.

It's funny when when F. S. Went ahead of the the U. In after Dorsey and the boys beat the the and and F. S. Went instead of a deserving Cains team to the BCS Championship where they lost to Oklahoma. I didn't hear from all of you about the system being rigged, and it's not fair. There's no punctuation there. You were big fans of the.

Turnout back back then, course, most of of you. This despicable, lunatic fringe probably didn't even know about when the Noles got the benefit over a great Miami team. Listen, man, I have always loved F. S.

U. Going back to the '80s. Bobby Bowden, the the the the the.

Consistency, something about that brand I was always attracted to. And what happened with 5-6 teams having a shot at the playoff and the Noles being undefeated and left out sucks, but I have to give an opinion on who I think the best four teams are. I'm not on the committee.

I don't vote. I watch watch I analyze teams, and I give my take. That's it. And if you think I have an agenda or a motive, I'm sorry you feel that way, but it's wrong. I love this sport and I care.

Care about it and I can't make everyone happy. I ask questions of the commissioners commissioners the the to understand things things clearly. Games and give my my opinion? A long sentence.

If it's for your team, you love me, and if it's against it, you hate me.

I wish it were different, and hopefully next year with 12.

Teams it will be. I'm a huge fan of Coach Coach and his team and wish Noles.

Nothing but the best. Boom. We went.

Through that pretty fast, and I know we thought it would take a long time, but that's because I thought there was going to be be punctuation. Punctuation.

-punctuation. There so many dashes.

I thought it was going to be like a comma in there every once in a while.

There was not. Kirk was just- His His job. I don't agree with everything Kirk Herb Street says. I don't agree with anything that anyone says, except myself and my own brain. I have the only good takes. The only right ones. Just kidding. But actually, his job must be terrible because people yell at him no matter what he says.

I get it because there are so many times that I want to lose my mind on on fan, so I don't judge Kirk Herb Street for responding. I do think think should have just like, Let's.

Bring the the character to the back. Put it in drafts, wait an hour.

Or you know what? Just go simple like, screw you. F off. We don't need to do the whole thing.

But.

It was still beautiful.

Thank you, Kirk. I enjoy when people just lose it on random people replying to pictures of their dogs on on because I've been there. Lucy and other news, that was fun.

That was actually really fun. I quite.

Enjoyed enjoyed We did a little bit of roleplay with Pat and our earlier earlier this We need to bring that back. We need to do a little bit more of this performance art. I enjoy it. There's been a ton of stuff, portal-related stuff happening the last couple of weeks. Live by the portal, die by the portal, as I say. There's a ton of quarterbacks in the portal, out of the portal. Tyler Van Dyk, formerly of the University of of Miami is going to Wisconsin. Actually, Taylor, I've been meaning to ask you about this because he's going to Wisconsin, where Luke Fickle, Fickle, a head coach, struggled a lot this season with their new offensive coordinator, Phil Longo, who formerly was an offensive coordinator for the North Carolina Tar Heels. What are your thoughts on Phil Longo?

There was a lot of complaints with the Phil Longo offense and how it was very good from the 20 to the 20. But once teams got condensed into the red zone and knew that Carolina couldn't really run the ball effectively, that was the disconnect with the Phil Longo offense, because statistically, you look at the numbers he put up, up, they always a top 25 scoring offense, a top 25 total offense. And he got Drake May to Carolina. He got Sam Howell to Carolina. So I do think he has shown the ability to get really good quarterbacks. But there are some hangups with his offense and the production that you get out of that.

Well, put Taylor on the the spot he was ready for that. In South.

Carolina-.

Thank you. Well, the thing we briefly talked about earlier this year, the thing with Wisconsin is like they're changing a little bit of of longstanding Wisconsin identity by hiring Phil Longo. And now bringing in Tyler Tyler Dyk to run this offense where Tyler van Dyk was super successful his first year with Miami and then has really struggled. But he's also had 5,000 different offensive... He's at a different offensive coordinator every single year that he's played. And he was super injured this year. There was that report that his muscle on his calf was detached from the bone or something. It was disgusting. I don't know if you heard that during the Louisville game, but it was very yucky. But the main main I I about Wisconsin offense this year was that it was like this weird identity-less mixture of things that Wisconsin should be better at and wasn't and didn't have really any identity, for lack of a better term. And they also didn't really have a great experience with the quarterback that they got in the portal last year from SMU. So this is interesting. This is something to look at.

I will say as an Iowa fan, I try to be nice. I wasn't devastated when I saw that he was transferring to Wisconsin. I wasn't like, Oh, man, that's going to be a huge problem down the line. Wisconsin, you said it perfectly. And Luke Luke has come in and completely tried to change the identity of Wisconsin, which is crazy because if you look at big big wins over the last 10 years, yes, yes, Ohio Michigan, and then it's always Wisconsin. They're the most consistent team in college football. I I understand, we have the the identity, and something that that Iowa struggle with as well. We want to be better than what we are. I think it's Wisconsin needs to get back to doing what they do best, and that's having huge offensive alignment. That's running the ball. You had one of the best running backs in all college football. I don't know how much Tyler Van Dyk fits the system. I do know that they're not in the Big Ten West anymore, but I think he'll have a lot of problems with Big Ten Ten defenses, I hope he does well, except for against.

There's also Dylan Gabriel went to Oregon this past week. That's going to be something to keep an eye out for. This is his third team that he's played against, but he did very well at Oklahoma, I thought. And now he's going to be joining Dan Lanning staff. I feel like Oregon, even though they lost both opportunities to beat Washington this year, they're a bit of a darling. They've done a lot of good good things. I think Dan Lanning is a coach that a lot of people like and want to see succeed. And now Dylan Gabriel is going to be in the big 10, Lucy. Oh, God. Joining that team. Cam Ward, Kyle McCord, DJ DJ and now Mylik Murphy, all huge quarterback names all in the portal. Riley Leonard transferred from Duke to Notre Dame. If you're a fan of Storylines and College football next year, Notre Dame is playing Texas A&M at Kyle Field. Mike Elko, former Duke head coach, former Notre Dame defensive coordinator, playing against Marcus Freeman, Notre Dame's head coach, who is now going to be coaching Duke's Duke's quarterback, Riley Leonard. There's so many storylines here. It is going to be a fascinating like, Why is everyone talking about Duke this week?

And that's why. Why.

And going to be great. Jimbo Fisher is going to watch somewhere from his yacht and he's not with his wild money. The big transfer portal news this weekend when Mylik Murphy entered the portal, immediately, my brand was like, He's going to Ohio State. He's going to Ohio State.

Something.

In my gut tells me he is going to Ohio State. I had the same feeling about about MacNamara. Also, I knew Grayson McCallough was going to go to NC State. That just made the most sense to the world. If you put all the NC State quarterbacks together the last 10 years, you just get Grayson Grayson Yeah.

They had also had a portal quarterback last year, Brandon Armstrong from Virginia, who was like, It didn't work out super well. Their offense wasn't great this year. They had a pretty good defense, though. And they finished the season season I would say nine and three, I think, which NC State was not on anyone's radar. But Grayson McCallough has been in college football for, I don't know, six years at Coastal. Now is transferring not far far to State to to play Raleigh.

One of the reports about Grayson McCall is he originally wanted to transfer to Carolina when before Drake May was taking over as a starting quarterback. But the coaching staff was like, No, we're pretty confident with with Drake May. So the Grayson McCall Revenge game, it's already on the calendar, and he will beat North Carolina.

We're putting a future on that. I like that analysis from Taylor. My team is going to lose this game. Game.

How I feel all.

The time. That's how I feel too. That Texas A&M game I was just... I don't know what to talk about. The biggest portal news of the week. Louisville got a guy named Thore Griffith from Harvard. I just thought that was cool.

Same level education.

Education. Hey.

University of Louisville.

The Ivy League of Kentucky. Lucy, we're going to do more ball picks next week because we should have done them this week. And then instead of doing any homework yesterday, we baked cookies. We did.

Well, Jess baked baked and then I put them on the paper. No, we.

Baked them together.

You baked them, and I I and I entertained, and then I put them on the paper. They were.

Very good, though. They were great. We had a good time. We should do that again.

We should do it again.

Handgirls.

All right, I think.

We're going to leave leave with our hands. Handgirls. All right, I think we're going to with our hands. Nope. No, you're right. That's not good. We don't want that either. All right, well, this has been fun. How much time do we have left, Taylor?

Oh, I can fill this.

Should we do a rapid-fire of the first first bowl games?

Yes. Do we want to do it at the same time? Time? I pick.

Okay, yes. Let's yell out our names on the the count three. Okay, so the first game is the Myrtle Beach Bowl, Georgia Southern Southern Ohio. One, two, two, three. Georgia Georgia Southern. Okay, the second bowl is the New Orleans Bowl. Jacksonville State versus Louisiana. One, two, three.

Jacksonville State.

The Cure Bowl. Saturday, Miami, Ohio. App State. One, two, three. App State. Oh, my God. Three for three. New Mexico Mexico New Mexico Mexico State. Fresno State. One, two, three. We're in a trip. We're in a trip. L. A. Bull, Boise Boise State. Ucla. One, two, two, Boise. Boise State. The Independent Independent Texas Texas Techs and Cal.

Texas Techs.