We've got two major stories locally, and neither one of them is the fact that college football has poured into this city. I see all the ESPN money on Ocean Drive as I wait still for a printer that hasn't come for four months. College football national championship is here. But one of the major two local stories we will be discussing in this local hour is not the championship of college football. And this the most bogus college football season ever played.

I'm guessing you're never going to see that printer. I mean, just.

Well, I've got someone I've got Bob who's going to be on the cover of Forbes in two years. According to Stu Stewart's with this miner's helmet. I saw him constructing something out there. I got very excited because I'm like, we've got a printer. Mike Ryan is going to be able to hand me a piece of paper, like a professional radio show for the first time in four months.

I don't have him on the cover of Forbes, Mike Hazam on the cover of Forbes. And because I can't remember Bob's name every Monday that I come in here, I just call him for.

Yes. Or notice how well you did a couple of funny things when you came in here today. You didn't just yell Forbes at Bob, the engineer and his miner's helmet. You did something else that was funny and leads us to what I'm going to wrap in a local story, because one of the very cool things that happens around here, I don't know if it's the coolest because we got a long list of the coolest is that you guys somehow in this audience develop some of the allegiances and caring about how our sports teams do how, you know, our Miami teams do, or in the case of Mike Ryan, how the Browns do.

So. Stewart comes in here today and he says, I don't care if you want it. I don't care if there's a pandemic. And he comes in and he hugs the armpit of an uncomfortable but joyous Mike Ryan, both of them wearing masks, both of them breaking what would have been Disney protocols to celebrate the first Browns playoff victory of Mike's of my adult lifetime. You are right. I was snuggled very, very comfortably in Mike's arm.

You both look very happy. You were happy as a Long-suffering Jets fan because after twenty damn years, I mean, you got the Bills winning a playoff game. You got the Tampa Bay Bucs irrelevant all of a sudden. But there has been no bigger loser across sports, maybe the Detroit Lions than Mike's football team, which he developed an allegiance to only because as well, at one time bought at a dollar store, a plate of a plate of Cleveland Browns, I don't even know what was it, what did the plate plate and napkins with the Cleveland Browns logo on it, which, as you know, is the most boring logo in all of sports.

And I was there when Sunday they were playing the Dolphins and my allegiance was born there. I wasn't born into it out of being out of northeast Ohio, but I stuck with this team and it's been a miserable experience the entire way.

And then last night happened, there was a couple of things. So when the Jets had their run and that's the only time Mike has seen me have any sort of football success. OK, so when the Jets had their run two years to a back AFC championship games, Mike was very, very happy for me. He was extremely excited for me. And I wanted to repay that to him because this is the I've seen Mike have sports happiness. I've seen him get LeBron James.

I've seen the Heat win two NBA titles go to the NBA finals last year. I've seen the Canes, you know, have a big game against Notre Dame a couple of years ago that got Mike super excited. I've never seen him have NFL happiness. And it's because it till last night, he's never had that. Well, Kelly, I want to give him a hug this morning. His great idea, his greatest playoff achievement this century is Kelly Holcomb.

And I lost for Butch Davis going for like 400 yards in a loss in a playoff loss.

Did anyone else go on the roller coaster ride with me last night of starting the game, genuinely rooting for Mike and saying, you know what, Mike deserves this. Let him have his night and then it got to twenty eight nothing. And you just said to yourself it'd be really good for the show if they if they blew that, it would have been good for them.

And that is what I just went into that mode. I have not rooted for a game that I didn't have betting interest on so hard in that second half just because of how good today's show would have been if they blew that.

I was I was think of that as well. But Mike was funny where he starts the game. Just happy to be here, OK? And then we all start mocking him because once you're up twenty one nothing or twenty eight nothing, you're no longer happy to be here. You start thinking about the Super Bowl.

Hold on a second, because I want to talk to Mike about this because I'm not sure given how long Mike has covered sports the way that we cover them, even though he can be unreasonably emotional.

I'm going to take a different stab at where Mike is with that, that it is so specifically joyous to beat that football team and that quarterback when Ben Roethlisberger has more wins in your stadium than any Browns quarterback that the guy in this century who's won more games in that stadium than any quarterback, Ben Roethlisberger, it's. Lot of Browns quarterback that the joy in, oh, he's old, he can only throw short and our time now our young people are coming for him.

Everything's gravy from here. You don't expect to beat the chiefs. You don't expect to be up on the chiefs. Everything's gravy. That specific team that has been your personal patriots. It's been to you. It's been to the Browns. What the Patriots have been to the Dolphins for twenty years, that you beat them, you knock them out at the knees and he looks old specifically because he can't throw the ball down the field anymore. I would think that anything from here is gravy.

And he's sitting on the bench sobbing after the game, tears pouring from his eyes. And the Browns are the ones that did it. That team is in salary cap. Hell, he's got a forty million dollar cap number, which by the looks of last I mean, he's always talking about retiring at the end of the season and then he can never say no to the money. So we'll see what happens there. But they're immature. Slot receiver that was saying that the Browns is the Browns headed into that game.

It doesn't matter that they're in the playoffs because they're so wearing that helmet and they're going to find a way I wasn't able to enjoy twenty eight zero or thirty five to seven. The way that most teams are, just because I'm constantly reminded Al Michaels did a very good job of constantly reminding who I am. It was just that sort of joy was always reserved for fans of the Steelers. It didn't matter what debate I was in, whether it be a political debate, high school teasing, it would always end up with me being a Browns fan.

And I would always fear that in any sort of because people always had the trump card on me.

Because you're laughing stock people laughing stock.

For twenty years I chose to be this loser and I know what happiness is in other sports. I don't have a single identifiable moment where the team has brought me joy. The most joyous moment of my Browns fandom was making the playoffs. It was it was a week ago. And to be able to do it specifically to that team, which it's not a small thing in that division, has been very hard. Those are two very successful teams in the Ravens and Steelers.

And they're constantly reminding you of who you are, not just by their success, but because of their vocal fan bases where an absolute joke and to be able to have a night it was I couldn't even process it. I was not drinking last night. I was nervous. I was pacing. And I was more stunned than Mike Tomlin was at what was happening.

Mike Tomlin expected that right, Billy? Mike Tomlin totally expected that. They prepared for that, did they not?

If he knew that was coming, he would show up, you would think, right? I mean, he he knew he knew it was coming. He just didn't tell us who did you you must have enjoyed. What was the highlight for you? Was it was it seeing Ben sobbing on the sidelines? The highlight for me was when it was a double zero and I realized that it wasn't a fever dream and I saw honestly the coolest moment, this is going to be weird.

It wasn't the postgame celebrations. It wasn't Baker putting on a backwards had for the zoo meeting, which I really enjoyed.

Did that for for those of you who do not know, Colin Cowherd has it later in life here. Becoming your grandfather of sports takes. He has identified his he's going to plant his flag in. Quarterbacks who wear their hats backward cannot succeed because they're too immature.

I'm not going to get mad at Colin for that today because at the time it was such a great take. It was just an original take. No one had ever had that take before and no one's ever had it since.

I know he keeps reheating it with, like a crappy microwave and it's just it goes viral every time. God bless him. More articles written about that than a 60 minute symphony that we had with original music featuring Kenny G and Method Man. So he must be doing something right. I'm not jealous at all. The coolest moment for me wasn't Corvette, Corvette and Jarvis doing that. And our first round draft pick tweeting out Browns, Browns and showing that we had a memory like that because they did.

They took inventory of everything that was said. There was a moment at the end of the game where Myles Garrett was running off the field and he smiles and he turns back to Baker Mayfield. They look at each other, they jump up in the air, collide bodies, and there's just absolute joy. Put a picture of that on my Instagram because the Browns are not the poster children for tanking. It hasn't worked for this franchise really ever outside of this one time.

That was only sixteen for Myles Garrett, one and fifteen for Baker Mayfield. And that was the end result that was so long ago held the Marquese Pouncy snap. Felt like so long ago I've come so far. But to have like the face of those season the pot of gold at the end of those crappy rainbows, that to me was the coolest moment.

I just want to explain to you how this works. I understand what you said. Like Mike's playing with house money now the Browns are playing with house money. I'm just going to go out like 2010. And I remember this. The Jets beat the Colts at Indianapolis. So they had beaten Peyton Manning. And then you start to think maybe we're on to something here, like we beat Peyton Manning on the road in Indianapolis. And then the next week we went to Foxborough and it was house money.

It till you're up three points in the fourth quarter and then it no longer becomes house money. You have an expectation you're going to win the game. And if you don't, you're going to start breaking. I'm not. I'm not. And the Jets won that game and then they go to Pittsburgh. And I'm telling you, I was thinking Super Bowl because they have to Brady and Manning, you're thinking Super Bowl on the road. And Mike's going to have one of those moments where he's up three points against Mahomes and he's going to expect we're going to enjoy this one.

I am not saying that there isn't the possibility from here on out that Mike Ryan won't be hurt by this football team. One game, one season. Do not erase the last 20 years. I am saying, however, he's not built like you to knee jerk from snap to snap. Like, of course, you're looking at it from your perspective, which is that you will jerk violently in whatever direction is suitable to you because you don't learn anything or retain anything from previous experiences.

I mean, Dan, he wears a mask with a dog face on, OK, like this. Not like some sort of scholar.

Of course, he's going to knee jerk and think that they're going to make it to the next round. I didn't make him a scholar.

I'm just saying that he has some perspective as it regards these thing.

You're making him some sort of nuanced, non crazed fan. Mike's crazier than all of what I am.

I am a little bit different. It's not because I've had all this life experience and I have a beautiful baby girl that I love so much has changed my perspective, really. I just watched Ted last, so I'm a different man because of it.

Your Twitter feed didn't seem like a different man. I mean, I'm just, you know, placating the fans of this show. I really was wasn't in a creative space, although the LeBron Choctaws with cocaine.

I am proud of starting out. It's good. I'm starting to regret that I hugged you, man. Or good.

I guess we'll get back to this in a second. One of the interesting things to got from this weekend, because I know that you've been wanting to proclaim a winner of the who gets the credit bowl and now Bill Belichick hasn't made the playoffs and Tom Brady has won a playoff game. But I will just say for the record, in both of them being diminished slightly by leaving each other, that Tom Brady just played a first round playoff game without a bye on the road and he wanted.

But that's not something he ever had to do when he was in New England like that. They never had to bother with that. The reason that New England kept going to Super Bowls and winning them is because they always got this week off. They didn't have to go now limping into their next venue to face a rested team. That's not something Tom Brady had to do very often, but I've been remiss in not mentioning before. Now, Chris, you know what the other big story of the weekend is, right?

You know what the other big local story of the weekend is? Chris Mortensen is saying not only this is fairly amazing for Dolphin fan. Not only does Deshaun Watson want out of Houston, he wants out of Houston for reasons that have more to do or as much to do, according to Chris Mortensen, with the way that they have handled some of the social injustice in America, the way they handled some of their general manager search, where they just end up, you know, basically going to the guy who is the team pastor for the Patriots and bypassing all sorts of more qualified people.

He was one kind of mad when they lost or traded Hopkins, but he's even angrier now, even though he has a no trade clause. And not only that two gods, but he is specifically identified Miami, for whatever his reasons. And I'm guessing it's at least in part because Mike Miamis leadership is black. Like I'm guessing that that's part of what's happening there. If he's so upset by the fact that Houston has whiffed on this stuff when it comes to sort of consulting with him as a black leader on the team, a quarterback with some legitimate power, who is young, who wants some sugar, who want some consultation and how things are going to be built around him.

The fact that Mort is talking about Houston trading Deshaun Watson for Toure and, you know, getting some of their draft picks back, one of these picks would be just just amazing mismanagement to lose Hopkins, to lose Watson, to trade for Laramie, Tunstall to have a bad season and then trade back trade back for your pick. That's amazing. Mismanagement like intergalactic dumb mismanagement that should make everybody in the Texans organization go back to Bill O'Brien's House right now and try to fire him again while it's on them for letting Bill O'Brien run their organization to be for as long as he did without having any anyone in place to help him out.

That's so, yeah. You have the black GM in the black head coach down here in Miami. And I'm certain that factors in. But you also have great leadership, period, regardless of color. And you have a great foundation for a good football team that appears like it's a really good quarterback away from being an amazing football.

I separate the race there, though, when you've got more reporting specifically that Watson has some trouble with what's happened with their leadership there. And Miami is the single blackest leadership group you will find anywhere in football, why are you saying? Well, their leadership is great. It doesn't matter that they're black?

Well, no, I was trying to make the point that they do have black leadership and they have great leadership, but I'm not certain it's just black leadership. I think he sees a very good football team run by two black guys.

I mean, he doesn't see a lot of skill guys. What skill guys does he see that makes him the team? That was ten and six. What if he guys does he see that? He said, I want to come play with those guys. I think he thinks he can make any guys pretty. I think he looks good year. He didn't this year. He didn't he didn't make anybody look good this year. All they did was lose.

But I think he sees enough in way of young players defense.

Why the new separated? I'm asking you a question. Why the need to separate? Let's say it was a really bad team, but it had a black head coach at a black GM. And you still think he's going to that team can be both of those things. I don't understand why you're eliminating the thing that I'm pointing out when Mort is specifically saying that one of the reasons he's upset, more upset than he was with DeAndre Hopkins is because they said they were going to go search committee and do it fair.

And they ended up the owner of the team just ended up doing the same thing all these owners do. I don't think that's irrelevant. I think it's part of why you're seeing it reported this week.

I'm not eliminating it at all. I'm telling you, if that's if they were run by the same two guys and one in fifteen last year, I don't know how much Deshaun Watson wants. That's fine, guys. But there are plenty of teams that are ten and six that could use a quarterback that don't have to. And he's choosing Miami for some reason. I'm telling you, it's not irrelevant. Like, I don't think more not saying that. I don't think more is reporting it because it's irrelevant.

Oh, it's absolutely a factor specific to what's gone on in Houston. You even have a search for a search firm that Texans ownership pays hundred thousand dollars to find a candidate for. And you bypass that and you go with a white guy, you want it anyways. I'm sure it's a factor. However, I ask you this. If Greer and Flores are in Indianapolis, do you see that report come out? No.

Miami house to Miami. Miami is multicultural and that helps, too. I don't think he had his license agreements from a boat.

OK, he Miami's awesome. He wants to be Miami.

He also led the league in passing yards this year.

Yeah. With the crappy year that he had. So you could almost make the argument from the Texans side, like, that's why we got rid of those skill guys, because we could still you could still throw for that many passing yards without those guys. But this is a dangerous game. The Dolphins are playing. We're in a new marriage where one year and they say the first year is the toughest year of marriage. And we're over here, you know, like an Instagram post texting with another married woman.

And it's just a dangerous game, of course. And I don't think there's a debate. Right. Any Dolphin fan can acknowledge it regardless of your ceiling. For Tua Deshaun Watson is an elite quarterback. Like that's a trade you make. Even if you think Tua is going to be good, you're not. Insulting to a by wanting Deshaun Watson, but it's a dangerous game, IMO, put it on the pole, please. Is the first year of marriage the most difficult year of marriage?

That's not something I've heard before.

It's the honeymoon phase because no one says that it's no good that I got the wrong. That's definitely saying a lot of times you're living with people for the first time, like not always.

Chris, what do you get to? It's 20. I've never heard that before. Like I know in my case, I would understand because there's a pandemic, but it's been a pretty magical first year of marriage, like, I don't think it would. I've never heard the expression before. The first year of marriage would only be the most difficult year of marriage. I think if you're certainly headed for divorce, if you've certainly and obviously married the wrong person, has anyone else on this on this radio show heard the expression used before the first year of marriage is the toughest year of marriage?

And Chris, more to the point, are you ready to cheat on tour? Because it sounded like you said all that and then at the end you said, yeah, and I'd make this trade in a second after fawning and fluffing, too, for the better part of, you know, 12 months.

I mean, we're currently in a relationship. So, yes, it's mean what we're doing to Toure. But to is like, you know, I don't want to give an example of a name of somebody that, you know, is on that. Like, you know, he's a ten. I mean I mean, Deshaun Watson is a ten and we're married to, you know, someone who could be an eight. Right.

Right. Well, currently is a five and could be in a but will never be a ten. I think that's like it will never be will never look as good as the show. Who made that decision already? Deshaun Watson had just under 5000 yards passing this year, three touchdowns, seven interceptions with no skill position players.

I mean, Nirmal put it on the pole will to ever be a ten because I don't think. How old is Deshaun Watson? Is he twenty six. Because this is a player, obviously. I'm with you, Chris. I'm just playing devil's advocate because if I were Miami, I would try and get that in that game as quickly as possible. If the Texans want to and are willing to make a trade, that is to offer Watson with some other pieces.

I mean, he's twenty five years old.

I mean, I don't think there's anything that would make you hesitate there if they call and say we want to and some other things, you take that call and you get ready to get rid of to him.

So I'm Googling hardest years of marriage. I'm seeing a good amount of articles on why the first year of marriage is tough. And I'm not like obviously seeing any definitive article about it being the tough. And then I just typed in Hardest Year of marriage and an article that says the seventh year of marriage is the most challenging. So I could have been a little off.

Oh, at a sound approach from a relationship therapist, Amy Hartstein, who said the first year really is the hardest, even if you've already lived together.

So there you go, my man. Billy, you really found an article going in any direction there.

And I appreciate you, Roy.

Have you are you headed into your seventh year of marriage? Is that why you moaned? Oh, has it actually been seven years since we were in that church together? It doesn't feel like it's been seven years.

It's it's been six years as of yesterday. So we're getting close.

Oh, Roy. But enjoy this. Roy, Roy, I mean, what a weird thing.

Why would it be the seventh year in the sixth year and not the eighth year? What sense does that make? It's very odd.

You're in your first year marriage. It's been fantastic, right? Even in a pandemic, it's been wonderful. The weird thing about this year for me, it's it's unbelievably strange. For me, it has been the shittiest year of my life. It has been the shittiest year in America that I have ever experienced. And it is the best year at home that I've ever experienced so bad.

The shrinking of my life to eliminate people has been a godsend, like it legitimately has been something that has made my life more manageable.

But it's only because I don't want to go anywhere. I can't be alone there. Right like this is there there are some there have to be some people listening to me and some people right here on this show who have enjoyed with some guilt, perhaps the fact that an American crisis has resulted in a home life that is simplified your life at a time that many people are suffering. Right. Because I don't take any joy in delivering what I'm delivering. It's just been super strange in that regard.

Yeah, I'm listen, I'm oddly grateful for because I have two daughters who are going to be going to college in in less than two years. I can't believe I'm saying that. Right. Like we've grown up, like my kids have grown up with you and I doing well. You know, you've done such.

You've got and we've talked about this before. What an enormous blessing. You have gotten four daughters of that age. Amazing. Or they go to college to get that concentrated amount of time at a time when teenagers would not normally have any time for you whatsoever right now before going to college.

And now all they like, they can't wait until Daddy gets home because, you know. They're sitting there, they're doing the school thing, and then they're, you know, my wife is dealing and she's always yelling at them because she's with them 24/7. So they're getting on each other's nerves. And then I come home and it's fun time. And so it's just I have been able to spend a great deal, just small things, playing tennis, watching 24, a show that I love with one of my.

How old are your daughters? They're 16, 16. They're juniors in high school. It is. I'm super. It's weird because we're going through a pandemic and people are struggling. But it's been oddly satisfying for me only because I've gotten to spend that kind of time with my daughters time I would not necessarily be able to spend because they be out get hammered every weekend.

What is the age when kids stop calling their father? Daddy is is it before?

I think we're going to find a definitive answer for this one. Is it 16?

My kids started calling me dad. Oh, it's an attack. But you still call yourself daddy. I did, yes.

So I'm there now because the reason I was asking the question is because I was surprised that 16 year old girl, we're still referring to you as daddy and you're like, no, I'm the only one who's still going with the daddy. They're not going with daddy anymore.

It's one of the things they don't tell you because a lot of guys I was like this. You like you know, I wanted a boy, you know, you want a boy so you can do all whatever. But a girl, they always fight with their mommy. I'm noticing this with my three year old. They just have this tension with their mother and they love daddy like it is just this is the best part about having a daughter is that the mom gets all the stressed relationship and the dad is the king.

It's the best.

Chris, I got to talk to you about what happened with your dad this weekend. I didn't know what that annoyed. Oh, Dad, me. Wait a minute.

You so you know what happened? You know, I was yes.

I was more involved than you thought of the lengths I was willing to go to make that easier on him. And he I mean, it was his fortieth thing. I mean, I don't what you can get into. I don't know.

Let's talk about this. So Cody got beat on a quote unquote, big story that he had on our radio shows, Guts. And I'm going to tell you people over the coming days, I'm going to be in over the coming months, really, as we go on this free agency experience with you and show you all of the nooks and crannies of how this happens, where we are a floating pirate ship that you've made the number one podcast in America.

But we don't belong to anybody. We're not owned by anybody. We've got people lining up. It's not just people wanting to sign a deal with us. We've got sponsors lining up, wanting to help us. We've got friends of the show lining up, wanting to help us. And one of them with whom we're going to get into business with to go find us a sponsor is the former president of ESPN for ten years. For ten years, this was the most powerful executive in sports.

You would have seen him at the top of every list in sports as the most powerful man in sports. He's coming over. John Skipper, the guy who brought us to ESPN, who built these studios, who made Miami and our stuff matter, he's coming over to be the CEO of this thing. And the story leaked this weekend. This has been an uncomfortable, hugely uncomfortable time where we've had to keep people around here in the dark because he's got a big job with the zone.

And if that leaks, it would have been problematic. And so finally, before we were ready to announce it, a reporter started sniffing around and asking questions.

And when that reporters started sniffing around and asking questions, I call Greg Codi to tell him, hey, this is about to break. I want to give you this story because it's about to break. And he's like, I'm at the beach. Can I just give it to somebody else?

That's how it happened. Now what?

Yes. And I know what you're thinking. Yes. It was Greg Cody that said that.

I'm thinking, what is he doing at a beach in the middle of a pandemic? OK, well, hold on. So let's go through the back story, because I haven't experienced this through Chris, because evidently his whole family now in his defense, OK, it was his fortieth anniversary. But what he actually says to me, as I'm calling him, because a reporter sniffing around and he's been sniffing around for weeks, this is one of many announcements that are going to be coming out over the next two months.

There's going to be all sorts of cool stuff around this. And we're very excited to share all of the pieces of it with you. But this is the first domino to fall. And he's been specifically asking a whole bunch of questions. And I've been telling him I'm not ready yet. We're not ready yet. But when I call him, his response was, I'm not making this up, guys. And you think the entitlements a joke, man, you couldn't give me more notice, huh?

And I'm like and my response is like, I can't control when a reporter is going to have their teeth in the story. Like, if you knew, what do you mean? And so. No, but Chris, I don't think the part you know, the part that he totally screwed up, totally screwed up. He gave a secret to another reporter at the Miami Herald. He was not supposed to. So he ends up betraying me anyway. The Miami Herald ends up reporting it and I get in trouble with the people I'm dealing with because all of a sudden The Miami Herald got a story that they shouldn't have.

And Greg Coati gave it to him, just handed it over because I told him what the story was. And and I'm guessing he was 12 beers in and he just called a reporter at the Herald and gave him the story. So he ends up betraying me anyways. Chris, I'd be fascinated, though, to experience this from your perspective, because I couldn't believe the entitlement in it. I couldn't believe that he was defending his behavior. I don't know how I keep getting surprised by this shit.

I really don't.

I just got a text from my mom saying, hey, perfect timing. We just got to lunch down here on the beach. And it looks like your dad, like, you know, has a chance to write the story. But he doesn't have his laptop. He doesn't have. And in my mind, I'm like, OK, I feel like my dad maybe could have seen the possibility of this coming and could have brought his laptop. But you know what?

It's your anniversary. I will go to your house. I will grab his laptop. I will bring it all the way down to the beach for you. That's what I was willing to do. And, you know, to my dad, I hate to rip my dad for this because he genuinely just was like some things are more important. And this is my fortieth anniversary. And when he hit me with that, I was like, wow, this is a shocking thing because Greg Cody, Mr CLECs, Scoop's Cody, like, you'd think this would be a big enough thing to get them to take an hour.

It wasn't like it was the middle of his dinner. They had a big dinner planned Saturday night. He could have I feel like in that three to five range, he could have just snuck away to the hotel room and done it. But, you know, he chose love.

Stephen A. Smith was writing columns on his phone for several years, like the idea that he couldn't string something together. That was five paragraphs long from his phone because he needed you to run. Get him a computer is fairly amazing.

Are you upset that he didn't do it and didn't hustle or you were more upset that he gave the story to someone else? Like if he just didn't write it? I don't know what I what happened.

I'm going to be totally honest here, OK? I ran across my apartment when it was sent from one of the people I have gone into business with. What is this doing in the Miami Herald? Screaming Curse words in a way that startled my wife and made her worry that something really awful had happened. And I had to look up and say, no, it's just Greg Cody being totally incompetent again, like she thought.

She's never seen me like that, just screaming at my phone. The phone was the phone. There was nobody on the phone. I'm just reading on the phone a text from somebody saying, what is this doing in the Miami Herald? And I'm just bleep bleep bleep like storming across the house because I know how it got in the Miami Herald. Greg TOTY, probably drunk, just gave it to a reporter. Has Cody become some sort of like John McClane for you?

Remember, Die Hard, the original movie where his ex-wife is saying John must be or he's still alive because only John only Greg Cody can make someone that angry.

But if Greg reported it, it would also be in the Miami Herald. Right. So what's the difference also, Dan? I mean, fortieth anniversary, you know what they say, fortieth year, toughest. Your marriage had to tend to that.

The thing that makes it hard to be too mad at him is fortieth anniversary of him choosing love. If if indeed that's what he was doing. I'd say, of course. But it's just your dad being a lazy oaf, like he's not actually choosing his marriage in that spot. It's just your father being lazy, wanting to be near the action in the laziest possible way.

I have another detail about it that I don't know he would want me to admit, and I don't even know if you like. So I'm just going to say this. And if it's that bad, we could take it out.

And no, we're not taking anything out. Listen, this is the way we're doing the show right now. Everything goes in. Nobody knows when they're on air. We're totally free. No taking anything out.

This this makes my dad it seem a little bit even more selfish, like, you know, you're thinking right now all mighty great, Cody. He chose love. He sacrificed the clicks, I'm pretty sure, because he gave the story to the Herald. He gets this like quiet clicks things. So he's getting credit for all these clicks from the Herald.

That's what happened quietly in his mind. He's like, I'm good. I got the clicks. My boss knows it was me, but I'm good. But it just the part of the show that's right now being connected to him, that's what he didn't care about.

We have to go forward, Mike. We need to make some executive decisions here because costs are getting steep. And as a start up business and we are very much going to end up being a startup business, we have to be judicious about how we spend our money. And I'm thinking Greg Cody works as a paid unpaid intern the rest of the way, like not a dollar from us, not one dollar, because he doesn't do any work. He doesn't do anything.

All he does is profit off of this. He does nothing other than expect to sit there and be in the middle of the action on Tuesdays. And so I am thinking of cutting his pay to zero dollars. He makes nothing. He just gets to hang around. Down with us and better be happy that even that is still the case. That's that's funny you bring that up, because that's another conversation we had where we've kind of just kind of been like, all right, Tuesday I'll see you in, like, assuming he's just like I haven't talked to Dan about numbers.

I don't know. It's totally fine. You know what?

I'm going to tell him we don't need him tomorrow. Just tell him I'm not Barry Jackson. Yeah, Barry Jackson. Report that. Yeah. As it gets go, Barry Jackson on as a guest co-host. We should do that. And all the people that Cody secretly hate, what would hurt him the most? Would it be Barry Jackson or Dave? Hi. Armando Salguero. Oh wow.

Yeah, that's it. Oh, man. Oh, jeez. Oh, hey.

Oh, we need to do this, Chris. We need to figure out. Let's not call him. Let's not send him a zoom link. Let's not this man's entitlement is out of control. We've got to get it. We've got to get it harnessed. Man like you. I don't think I've been that angry at anybody in the last six months about anything where I'm stomping around the house, cursing in my phone because just his general incompetence and selfishness has resulted in us having something happened before it was supposed to happen.

So, Billy, you say you say what difference does it make? It appeared in the Herald, a reporter had that story did actual work. Hell, the story until we got back with either confirmation and no comment in the space in between. I called your father with some urgency. This is about to break. The guy who did the work ends up getting beat by a guy who did nothing on the beach other than take quiet clicks. Like it's just it's simply wrong.

Is it safe to say that if you were that angry at any point over the last six months, it was also a great coach? Yeah, probably.

Probably it's I don't know what to do with it, but this has taken a turn this morning that it shouldn't take. So if you get Deshaun Watson forward to what? Chris, just I want to hear it clearly from you, Billy. You haven't said how you feel about this as a Dolphin fan. Is there any hesitance with you? You you ship too off right away. But Watson, yes or no?

I mean, it depends how to. It does in Texas, obviously. If they do well, if it does well and he's good that it was a horrible trade, then you need to do it's the long game with these opinions and it's the long game right now. You make the deal two, three years from now if it doesn't work out. Daunte Culpepper, what were you doing? Why didn't you take Drew Brees? Everybody knew he was going to win a Super Bowl when it was going on.

Everybody wanted Donte Culpepper.

I love who was in the mad commercial getting his role on going into the end zone. Daunte Culpepper.

I just think Billy is so right about this, then you can't really give your opinion on these things until you see how it plays out.

That's a hard way to do a sports radio show like I am with Billy on. He gets to not be wrong the way that he just did. Effective damn perspective.

That's what I'm bringing to this. Mike, were you were you having trouble sleeping last night? Yeah.

Yeah, my wife went to bed and I was very upset with her. She's she's like at halftime, I'm tired. I'm going to go to sleep. I'm like, don't you know who we are? This is I mean, we're winning. You can't go to sleep because we're winning. I was very superstitious at the time, so I took great joy in in waking her up when I was finally ready to go to bed, hugged her and said we did it.

She was a little upset. I'm like, Ben Roethlisberger is crying. She doesn't I'm like talking juju. And she had no idea what the hell I was saying. My Corvette, Corvette. And she said, yeah, she was very confused. But this morning she was very happy for me. And that's the cool part, is people know like how tortured I've I had a high school teacher stay up and watch that game start to finish just because she knew how much this team has meant to me and what a loser I've been for supporting them.

So it was really cool. I FaceTime my my Browns fans again because we got to keep this going. And I can't believe, like it's reserved for other teams. We're going to be playing a playoff game at Arrowhead against the greatest football player ever. And now that he's he's playing in New Orleans next week, that's Tom Brady. But, Mike, did you take it all in post game sound? All of it. Did you listen to the post game show on the radio?

Like what happened?

I'm inhaling that and loads of cocaine, but I'm inhaling that. Well, how much did you sleep?

How many hours? Because you're wired, right? You were wired. Wired. I was just like, I can't believe this is real life. I can't believe I do. I deserve this.

And it was a nine six either. It was like, just bury them right off the start, just bury them.

And it was it was it got tight, but no one score tied like. Oh no, they could get within one score tied. So it was a nice little bit of nerves and it was good to see the Browns respond. But it's not just the history of the franchise. I think that's their first road playoff win since the 1960s. It's not just that.

Hell, this. A week has been a year, right, just this week alone, forget everything else, viruses, everything going on. You thought your first you thought your first playoff appearance was going to get submarined just by pandemic bad Browns loss.

Yeah, I saw Michael Strahan on GMA like what a year this week has been with all that, like the Capitol building stuff. And just for the Browns and stuff like two old pros in and out, you have no idea. People are driving to Pittsburgh. Half of them are flying to Pittsburgh. You have a special teams coach who is terrible at challenges being your head coach. Alex Van Pelt calling plays for the first time. Baker Mayfield said postgame because we had a replacement in for Joel Bertoni, who's an all pro done, came in and filled in admirably.

Dunn gets hurt and we're playing a guy I don't know his name, Baker said. I introduced myself to him before the game. I said, Hi, I'm Baker. That's what we beat the Pittsburgh Steelers with at Heinz Field. The last time we won there, I think William Green had like sixteen carries from negative six yards.

Would you sacrifice your Christmas every year if met the Browns to win a playoff game?

Yeah, this is the greatest gift. I'm not I'm not questioning. I'm not. And this is the greatest Christmas gift.

So your Christmas was ruined because you got the coronaviruses. Yeah, yeah. No, I've got the coronaviruses. Never revealed that ball.

I'm sorry. No, it's OK. No, I might as well come out and say it now. Thankfully I tested negative enough times so I could be here on Monday, but I tested negative five times while my wife had it and then my daughter started having symptoms. She got it. Five days later, I tested positive. Thankfully, I think it was asymptomatic.

I did have back pain, which Ellen said is a symptom nobody talks about. Quoting Ellen is like she's as if she's Foushee. Well, she does. She does that. In fairness, at the beginning, I think it was it was it Deborah Masina? Who was who was it? There was someone we were getting Will and Grace.

Debra Messing, you made Debra Masina. Debra Messing. How are you making this worse than Ellen? Like, how did you go? Because I am telling you, she was tweeting about covid-19 and we were all using it like it was gospel.

I'm telling you, no, Ellen did that thing where she takes a bunch of her famous friends and thinks that that's a way to relate to Middle America, which actually it does in some sort of way. Well, Katy Perry told Ellen that her back hurt. So maybe it's a real thing. And that's what I got. And thankfully, it got out of my system. So negative with antibodies. Now you can hug me. All right. You said you digested all of the press conference stuff.

Mike Tomlin, explain why he didn't go for it on that fourth and one bad battery.

What the hell?

When he decided to punt in Browns territory, that's when it hit me like, oh, winning is an option here. When we were up 28 zero, I'm like, I'm thinking that another chapter in my Browns heartache is just slowly forming. But then when he starts willingly deciding to give a terrible defense of the ball back, I'm like, Yeah, just let your offense go to work. I'm like, wow, I thank you. I think we can win this.

What made that puzzling, Chris, is he went for the touchdown instead of the field goal in the possession before and watch because you didn't want to make it a two score game with the field goals. Silly, but for the touchdown he took a chance and they took and they got the touchdown. So that made it a twelve point game. But once you make that decision, you were telling your team, I'm all right, I'm going to go for it every time I fought down, no matter what.

And then he has a fourth and one of the next drive. You're right. It was a terrible just. Oh, my God, he's running the ball. Well, I mean, they're running their running game is bad. Like, I get it in theory, but it's like just go for.

No, but look, let me just do this for you, OK? Because I need to offer a little bit in the way of data here, because while you guys are right, you guys are indisputably right that he should have gone for it. I will tell you that the decision Mike Tomlin made, there was a scared coach who knows that over the last six games, his football team is bad. And I'm about to show you what he knows in that situation that he does not trust.

Now, I think he should have gone for it. But listen to these stats from Peter King over there. First eleven games, the Steelers were 317 points scored. One hundred and eighty eight allowed. So that's twenty nine points per game. They're scoring seventeen points per game. They're allowing and they were averaging ninety nine rushing yards a game over the last six games, six games when they weren't eleven and they were one in five. Over the last six games they scored one hundred and thirty six points, they allowed 172 which means they were scoring twenty three points a game allowing 29 and the rushing yards from ninety nine to fifty two.

Mike Tomlin limped into the playoffs with a bad football team decimated by covid and a whole bunch of things and that eleven and all wasn't real. The Browns were a five and a half point underdog in that game, but should not have been even with all their covid issues because they were playing what, over the last six games was simply a bad. Football team, not a playoff team, not an average football team, a bad football team. Why don't you feel good about.

I know it's Kansas City. I know it's I know it's Patrick Mahomes. And I said this a few weeks ago, and I think Dan laughed at me back when we were still at ESPN.

I said their game travels well and they could win anywhere against any team because they could run the football with those two guys, run the football.

It's just stopping Patrick Mahomes. But you can keep Patrick Mahomes off the field. I think our running game, it depends on what Conklin and Antonio status is, but I think a running game will be able to do what it wants in that game. I just don't know if we're going to get the stops necessary. But it's a it's a defense. You saw it last night. It's a defense totally predicated on making a big play. If you make the big play, that's a stop.

If you can get the ball and return it and make it easy on your offense, all gravy, they're going to need Denzel Ward to get back and do something in. Myles Garrett needs to continue affecting the game that he did last night. Even though he didn't make the impact play, he caused enough havoc to make others make the impact play. I don't think we're going to win that game. What do you think? It's going to be high scoring?

What sucks, Mike, is that you would prefer to play any of the remaining teams.

I feel like I won. Yeah, I'd have a shot against that. That you would end up. No, but never mind AFC of any of the remaining football teams. No, but he would feel good about his chances against any team except the one that he's playing.

Yeah, I do think that's a lot of points, though. The Browns can score with them. The Browns can keep up with them and do the thing where the running game goes off and you keep Patrick Mahomes on the sideline and hopefully maybe a center can snap a ball over someone's head again. That'd be nice.

Would you rather go to Kansas City or Green Bay? Green Bay, you would feel the same way.

Those are two really good teams. We're not in that class. I think our point differential is now positive. We're not in the same class.

Got to hope for bad weather. You've got to hope for bad weather. That slows down my home.

And I can't believe we're getting better week to week where you see the difference. How the season started at Baltimore. Yeah, that first game against Pittsburgh. Cleveland is obviously a team that's ascending. I can't believe it. Twenty twenty one three. The final eight quarterback still or Brady. Brees and Rodgers.

I mean, Roethlisberger just limped off the field, aging the way quarterbacks are supposed to age almost Philip Rivers do almost Philip Rivers who look, it's never looked pretty to leaving Philip Rivers hand, but Jesus Christ, no one had any faith in that ball, me making it to the end zone.

That's not by Pouncy, though. It was so good. It was so good.

My favorite part was OK, so we've said before, we've said for three seasons that watching Ben run around back there is like watching a skyscraper with legs because none of his parts are connected. He hasn't taken care of his body. Bomani was telling us the story the other day. Trevor Pryce told him this story. The defensive end, who almost had 100 sacks of Stewart, says it's overrated. He says that tackling Tom Brady, that Tom Brady, because his physical parts are so well connected, the fascher from head to toe is is just perfectly balanced.

He says that when you tackle Tom Brady, he absorbs you. It feels like you're being absorbed.

He says when you tackle Ben Roethlisberger, it's like shattering glass that you go, you dive in them and you've got shards in your neck because he hasn't taken care of himself.

That that high res photo of the tears pouring out of his eyes and just him sitting on number one, just inject that directly into my veins.

I almost tweeted, I feel bad for Ben here. But then I remembered of all the stuff that you've done, that's suspect don't for that for Ben, his whiskey nose in that moment like I, I do that I'm like finding myself going to the iPhone screen and pinching it just because I want to see how much whiskey squirts out of the nose when I applied the slightest bit of pressure.

Did you guys notice, though? Did you guys notice that? So the ball is in the end zone. He didn't come close to recovering it because he has trouble going down to the ground and he has trouble getting up and he just stands or he's just on his hands and knees staring at the ball. Oh, my God, I'm facing the wrong direction. My ass is ninety nine yards from where I would like it to be. I'm staring in the wrong direction straight ahead.

Oh, no, we're down seven. Nothing, and it's about to hurt to physically simply get him running backwards like no running forward but in the wrong direction.

And then those peaks backwards as he kept looking back.

I know that they're not getting further away derivates. Everyone's coming to get me.

So ever since I moved to my TV, I've noticed that I have a little bit of a delay. So I'm sitting down. The kickoff just happens and the teams are running out to the field and my phone starts blowing up, blowing up. I'm afraid to look, because you know what? I'm assuming people are texting me because Chase Claypole is just gone to 80 yards on the first play. Because we're starting a special teamer out there guarding him and then the snap happens, I'm like, whoa, that must be why they're texting me and the ball keeps rolling and rolling.

And Ben Roethlisberger is refusing to fall down and just watching us go in, like as if he's like on a punt team, like just wanting it to roll as good as he wanted it down it at the right.

I mean, all these beautiful orange pants just slide into the screen and it's zero. The Browns were up twenty one to nothing. And now Michael still hadn't gone to the line up graphic, introducing the entire offensive line.

I love that he wanted to get out of the war. And five.