You're listening to DraftKings Network. What is the TV show that you're working on that you've been consumed by that you haven't had enough time to come here and waste your time giving us stats of the day?

It's a new show for Netflix with Ted Danson. It will be out probably sometime in November-ish, but I don't know for sure. I'm keeping the details of it mostly under wraps.

Why is that?

Because it doesn't serve anyone to tell people what a show is about eight months before it appears on your home streaming services. It's based on a documentary, a very good and funny and charming documentary that was made about four years ago, and I think it's going to be good. I'm very happy with how it's turning out so far.

Well, are you ever wrong about that when you think- Well, it's never wrong. No, but I say this genuinely as a creative person who makes great things and has a very high standard. One of them is the podcast that he does with Joe Poznansky. It's great, and it's fun for a lot of different reasons. But is your governor often wrong on that one? If you think something's good that you're making Are you ever wrong?

I think that I'm pretty confident in whether something's good or not. That doesn't have any bearing on whether or not it works and sticks around and becomes a long-running TV show. I would say I'm right about the heat more often than I'm about whether a TV show is going to work.

But I'm not asking you if you know every time whether you're making a hit because you can't know once you've created something, what the results of it are going to be. I'm asking you if every time you make something, you turn it in and you think it's good.

Well, no. I think it's as good as I can make it. That doesn't mean it's objectively good. There's probably no such thing as objectively good. I think I know I have a fair degree of confidence in whether I think something is good. That doesn't mean I always think the things I make are good. I Sometimes you can't nobody... Sometimes you go one for four. You go one for four every day for five years. You're a Hall of Famer. That's how I think of it. That's right. Yeah. Well done. I have breaking news, actually. I just got an email about writing something for Stugatz's book. What the fuck?

Congratulations to you. Welcome. And welcome to the club. Stugatzbook. Com, everyone.

It's still unwritten. Email was not from Stugatz, by the way. Of course not. You got to be kidding me.

You want to leave her out.

I mean, You know what we need to- I did my assignment already.

I finished my... I was told I had to do it by February ninth or something, and I raced to finish it. And then another month has gone by, and it's pretty clear I could have just waited.

You had it till May first, to be honest.

You weren't busy at all. You weren't busy on a TV show or anything at all. Jessica, that is the proper response. It's unbelievable.

I appreciate it, Jess.

It is breathtaking.

Do you know how many texts there have been amongst people who, shall remain nameless, just Are you doing this? Do we have to do this? I guess we have to do this, right?

The gall is breathtaking. Is it not?

The spin is great, too, which I didn't want you to feel left out. I don't think there's a person that you sent this to that would have felt left out.

The response I've been getting is overwhelming. It's been great. People are honored. They're flattered to be a part of the book.

Mine got lost in the email.

Jessica, if you're volunteering, he will absolutely- I got one for you. Look at the general The generosity of Stugatz. I've got work you can do for free, Stugatz. I got you. Jessica, are you- I get a gift after. Are you telling us right now that he hasn't even done you the courtesy of asking himself? Some of his people have reached out on Stugatz's behalf to ask you to work for free?

I have people now.

That is accurate.

That's how it happened to me, too. It wasn't an email from Stugatz. It was someone I've never heard of going, Here's a 400-word, barfed-up essay about statistics. Now, can you write 500 words in response?

That's what my email said, too.

What a grift.

Thank you to both of you. I did reach out to certain people like Scott Van Pelt and Stephen A. Smith, Levitard. Sure, the important people. Yeah, still waiting to hear back from him. Van Gundi already sent it back.

So did Gurchin. I am telling all of you, and I can't believe I talked to the publishers yesterday. Book publishing is-Wow, what was that?

Tongue twister.

Sorry. No, thank you. I deserve That's what you're doing now.

I'm not sure that- You spoke to my publishers?

No. Book publishing is dying, and Greg Cody and Ron McHill have a certified hit on their hands. All I'm laughing about, as I can't speak, is that Stugatz has a grift of a book where I'm thinking his 400 words could be AI generated, so he doesn't actually have to do any bit of work here except convince all his friends to work for free.

Wish I I never thought of that.

Well, hold on. I have an idea now. Everyone that you should reach out to should just use ChatGPT to write their portion of your book, and then it will fall on you for all of it being plagiarized.

I am good with that. Just stamp your name to it, okay? That's all I care about.

Mike, you have no problem with AI doing all of this, do you?

I will say that the section that Stugatz, in quotes, wrote that I read was just him talking about going to Grateful Dead concerts and then saying that Kevin Durant doesn't have any rings in his personal record book or whatever. It is the essay that would have been churned out if you had entered a ChatGPT prompt that was like, Write an essay about statistics in the style of Stugatz. There wasn't a lot of substantive It's beyond the stuff that we've all already heard a thousand times. I think there's something to this theory.

So Stanzet gave you the Kevin Durant chapter, huh? Yeah, that was my assignment.

You're welcome.

Yeah. That's the big one, Mike. That's the big one.

I can't believe it. The big Wait a minute. Wait, the only one. I just saw something. Those faces in the back row sometimes are revealing, even though Tony is hiding his. I saw in both Jessica and Billy, something that morphed from what has been pride into Stugatz in the general being of Stugatz to something that felt a bit like disgust. Like, Jessica just got handled by Stugatz's people.

You could say no, Jess. I mean, it's okay. Just don't say it to me. Say it to my people.

You Guys, you haven't lost the love of Jessica and Billy, but they seemed-Oh, I lost Billy's love a long time ago. I don't know how you got this book to you. I don't know how you got this book to you.

You've got nothing written. How did they sign you?

I'm waiting on Dan.

I have to do it as ChatGPT. Will you put some together? Billy, just give it to me as ChatGPT. I'll just submit it and we'll turn that in. I don't want to work for him.

I don't want to be-Wait a second. I work for you. You're outsourcing your work to Billy and telling him to outsource it to an AI chatbot. That's even lazier than Steve God's writing the book.

Someone set up the AI machine. Someone gets it. Okay. The microfeet. Let's do stat of the day. What's your stat of the day? Oh, yeah.

Wembenyama this year in 56 games has 193 block shots. The Miami Heat in their 61 games have 207 block shots. And by the way, Victor Wemenyama has played 28.7 minutes a game, unlike the Heat, who generally play 48. And also there are five of the Miami Heat. So really, if you total it up, it's Wemby in 1,608 minutes has 193 blocks, and the Miami Heat in 14,640 minutes have 207 block shots.

All of those numbers are amazing. And if I come back at you by simply saying, yes, but the heat have an elite defense, and Wemby is great and blocks a ton of shots, and his team's no good, and they're already talking on ESPN about maybe Wemby will get impatient because... Even though that's not- Already? Well, it's not in any way factual. It's just, well, we need something to talk about. It's March, Dano. Yes, it's March. It wasn't even that egregious, but we need to talk about something. But it is fair to say that the Miami Heat defense maddens you. You hate the way they play because they're great at defense without doing it in a way that you feel is esthetically pleasing.

No, they madden me because they play a zone more than any other team. These guys haven't played zone since they were in AAU, and they all forget how to defeat a zone, and they all try to run the same offense that you run when a team isn't playing zone, and then they look befuddled and confused. A 2-3 zone or a 2-1-2 zone is a thing that you learn how to defeat when you're 16. Then they forget because no one else does it. They run the zone and everybody freaks out, and no one remembers, what are we supposed to do? Someone is supposed to flash to the post, and then someone cuts down the baseline. What do we do? Then you look up in the heat of gone on an 11-0 run, and they win the game 93 to 89, and it's maddening and infuriating.

Why did you disagree with me when I said you don't like that they do it in a way that's not esthetically pleasing you? You disagreed with it and then agreed with me.

No, it's not just that it's not esthetically pleasing. It's that it is so easily countered by teams that just don't counter it. When they ran that zone the other night, I can't remember what game it was, they were running the zone constantly, and whoever they were playing, can't remember who it was, maybe it was Denver, just kept trying to do the same thing. They kept trying that dribble handoff, that they run with Jokić at the high post, and then the guy wouldn't be open because it's a zone coming around of Jokić. Then here's the other thing that happens. I talked about this with Haberströ the other day on his podcast. Then they're like, Okay, let's reset. They do the thing with like, let's reset the offense, and they retreat to the half-court line. The thing that he get a lot of credit for, for me, at least, is they chase the ball handler all the way back to the half-court line. They put incredible ball pressure on whoever has the ball, and that guy isn't used to that either. He's like, freaks out and panics, and they're all standing around and panicking, and suddenly there's four seconds left on the shot clock.

The thing that they get the most credit for for me is their ball pressure. No one goes unhounded. Nobody No one can walk the ball up the court. No one can run the offense from the point. They all are under constant ball pressure by these annoying little nets that the heat have that drive me up the wall. All these nameless, faceless little turds who run around and swath at the ball. Every time there's an entry pass, there's eight little hands going, again, snatching the ball away. It's so awful to watch. I hate it so much. You know what? This is good for me because I have I haven't felt the same hatred for the heat this year so far, and this session is getting me revved up again. This is preparing me for the playoffs. So not esthetically pleasing.

He won't say it. Fine.

You were right. Yes, you were right. I apologize. He said it. He said it. He said it. He broke them. But he's like, I mean, what?

This is a kind and decent human being who just hit us with nameless faceless turds.

It's what they are.

It's what the people did. Okay, let's waste some more of... You know what? It's not going to waste his time. I want to give him a promotion, not to more than intern, but I do want his basketball knowledge to be on full display. So let's get corporate-sponsored DraftKings. Let's get around the idea that Mike Shirt really knows basketball. I don't know if he knows it as much as baseball. Let's get against the spread. I want his gambling advice.

Against the Spread is sponsored by DraftKings.

Stay tuned because you'll hear more about DraftKings and all it has to offer throughout the show.

Draftkings, the Crown is yours. Let's start with Mike Sure with Against the Spread.

I don't think we should start with him. He doesn't know. Give him a minute. I've got the magic tonight. The magic are playing the Wizards. The magic are a seven and a half point favorite-They're playing well.at the Wizards. They're playing well. At the Wizards, they're good. The Orlando Magic are young and good. The Wizards are the worst team in the league, worse than even Detroit. I'll take the magic on the road. What do you have there, Mike Scher?

I feel like I should give a caveat that I've never placed a single bet on a single sporting match in my entire life. Okay, that's the- I just feel like I need to- That's not good.

That's not good. Not good. Not the game. Not good.

You're so moral. I didn't ask for any of this.

Not good basketball content.

No, you did not. Games against the spread, not what's your life story.

You need more time? Are you credible?

No, I got it. No, the Bucs The Bucks are in San Francisco tonight playing Golden State. The Bucks, according to what I'm looking at, are plus four and a half. I think the Bucks are figuring some stuff out, and I think the Bucks have put it together. The Warriors are tough at home, but I would take the Bucks in that game. Plus four.

Against the Sprads.

It's actually plus four. The Warriors are 16 and 15 at home. They're not great.

I actually have the Warriors in that game. Minus four.

Against the Sprads.

I was going to give you more information. Look back to the last match of Milwaukee, 129 to 118. A lot of people are talking about last time the Warriors played, they lost by 52 points, Dan. Don't worry about that, though. Things are starting to click at the right time. Don't worry about that one game because here's a stat. In March, the Warriors are actually one and one. So they've won as many games as they've lost. And that's against the spread.

Over to you, Jim. I retroactively feel I did not have to give any disclaimer based on that level of expertise.

He's bad at it. We've been reprimanded by DraftKings because he's bad at it.

Seven and three in the last 10, Dan. Hot. One and one in March.

Get out of here. Draftkings doesn't want you around there gambling and spreading.

I won against the spread. I'll have everybody know. I've won against the spread last time.

One and one in March. Speaking of last time, there's only one guy in here that's nine and oh at the current moment on all NBA It's amazing.

Wait, can I stop and celebrate that for a second? No, let's stop for just a second. Let's stop for just a second, okay? Three straight three-team parlays. If you lost money with our show and bet all of that, Juju remade your money because those are hard to do. He's hit nine in a row. And so thank you, Juju. You're not getting enough love here. It's ridiculous. You're giving away money.

You give me enough love every single day just by being my brother. All right. So tonight in the league, I'm going to stay in the National Basketball Association. We all know the Lakers, they are up and down. Lebron said it himself, Sometimes we win, sometimes we lose. And looked at the cameraman like it was his fault. So with that in mind, I'm going with the Sacramento Kings, baby. Plus two tonight. De'aaron Fox is back.

You feel me? Light the beam.

You feel me?

Light the beam. They haven't been great.

They haven't been great. They have not been great. De Aaron Fox is back off of his injury, and Sabona's got that look in his eyes. That is all I need against the Lakers because they will crop the bed against the spread.

That's good.

That's good. That rimes. Say it, Mike. Mike, take us home.

Against the spread.

Against the spread. Crap the bed. Crap the bed. Crap the bed. Crap the bed. Crap the bed. Against the spread. Yes. Do a promotion. I want you as one of the most successful writers in Hollywood and somebody who's moral to give DraftKings its slogan, It's time to crap the bed against the spread.

You're addressing the favorite in that scenario. You're addressing the Lakers, and you're saying, It's time to crap the bed against the spread. I love this. This is great. I can get on board with this.

There it is. Draftkings, there it is. You have the endorsement. Let's do this as, I want to create this specific lane for us as a gambling business entity, where we have Josh, your, Today's the day we crap the bed against the spread, brought to you by DraftKings.

I love it. You want me to say that?

Yes. I want you to sell it. I want you to- You'll reimburse any lost bets. You'll fully endorse this with all of your Hollywood backing and all of your friends, this is how to crap the bed against the spread and win some bread.

All right, listen up. Listen up, Betting Favorite. Tonight is the night you crap the bed against the spread. Yeah.

All right.

Let's win some bread. I win the bread, yeah.

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