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Welcome to the Big Suey, presented by DraftKings.

Why are you listening to this show? The podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan Lebitard podcast.

I'm sorry. I'm not going to apologize for that.

In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging. I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries if they're just there. That hasn't happened to you guys?

I've done it.

And now, here's the Marching Man to nowhere, Fatface and the Habitual Liar. Stugat, Jay Billis is coming through here this weekend to do South Beach Sessions. Jay Billis has built an amazing career, from law to being a moral great voice on a sport through culture wars as ESPN and basketball coverage changed. Jay Billis, everyone knows that guy knows his stuff. When this guy's talking about how it is the NCAA has to be upended, he's so thorough, so factual, so on point without a fact out of place that everyone says, Yep, you're a good caretaker for You're a good voice for the sport. We don't have too many of those. Jay Billis goes on television with a strong voice and is wildly credible. I've now lived long enough for him to say the most asinine thing he's ever said, which is that everyone who storms a court needs to be cited and arrested and ticket it up.

Eighteen thousand citations. He said that would stop it. The very next day- Jay Billis.

Listen to me. Jay Billis is the best. Otherwise, J. Billis is the best. But it doesn't all have to escalate to arrest everyone when a Duke player gets hurt.

Allegedly.

Allegedly. Nobody now.

This is the other thing. Oh, he escaped major injury. Heavens. We all knew it. Come on. You knew it when you saw it, especially that second angle. He was trying to draw contact. I'm just saying, he wasn't hurt. He embellished it. And the reaction was just so out of hand. And I understand, something needs to be done. And here's the thing that needs to be done. If you're a two and a half point favorite, don't storm the court. The wake was favorite in that game. You're embarrassing yourselves. Almost as much as Wlpowski did, and certainly the coaching staff. And I understand, emotions run high, and occasionally we're going to have these conversations. I do actually think something should be done about it. I don't think it's arresting people because your school was involved.

But Jay is right when he says that would stop it, right?

I'd agree. That's why- No, no, no, wait a minute. You want to know why? No, no, no, no. It wouldn't. No, because no. If it's 30,000 people, no. If it's thousands of people, you're going to have so much armed security there.

You know what you will never see here in South Florida, mainly because I don't win big games, is fans storming the field at Hard Rock Stadium. You know why? Because that's all but guaranteed. We're going to get jacked up by the police down here. This is not some college campus. We can't be doing that stuff, and it's why you'll never see it down here.

But I would say in certain sports, especially college basketball, if you beat Duke, regardless if you're the favorite or not, you should storm the court at home. Because Duke has been so good for so long, and they are so unlikable that when you beat Duke, you want to storm the court and celebrate it.

No, there should be a protocol because believe it or not, Miami still has this cache, especially in football where they haven't done much over the last two decades, and it happens often to them. And I've spoken to players that have been on the field as it's been stormed and fans have punched them in the head. It's not like you get a drill from your head coach, Now, guys, in the event that we lose, keep your composure because there are going to be fans like, that's a loser mentality, and the coach is not going to prepare someone for it. There should be something in place where you get the best of both worlds, where fans get to have that experience, but you keep players safe. I don't know if it's some clock that's in constituted where security just holds the line for as long as they can. And I know that's asking a lot of security. If it's messaging that goes over the PA, maybe that's something. We can certainly do more, and we haven't tried a lot. But part of this is also, Clemson, stop rushing the field when you're a 15 and a half point favorite.

The solution is super simple. I believe it happened when Creighton beat Yukon. They just had a clock up there. It's like 30 seconds. You can play a video on the video board of something with the player saying, Hey, hold up. There's a very simple solution. I will say, though, J. Bill has had a great point. I think the woman who hit Kaitlyn Clarke should be in jail.

See.

She sold it, too.

She's a trendsetter. Shut your mouth. Her influence is undeniable when you see that Duke highlight.

She's trying to make the sport safer for everybody.

She's just amazing. I think Billy had the proper perspective yesterday and the proper response. Don't lose.

I mean.

Don't lose.

But they were a two and a half point dog. Dug.

Don't lose. The netting around the field hasn't really hurt baseball.

Just throwing it out there. No one stormed a baseball field.

It's a horrible overreaction.

It's like the disco night.

Let's throw a net up around the basketball court.

We've been storming courts and fields forever, and we have two bad incidents. It's suddenly Bill Self wants to end it.

It's not even that bad. He generates the contact.

It is a bit of a powder keg, though. You can understand how in our lifetime, something is going to go wrong, and someone might actually get hurt, and there might actually be a brawl on on the playing surface. We can all see that coming. I do think that there should be some leadership here in getting out ahead of things, but unfortunately, the governing body may be dead anyways.

Well, let's get to that in just a second. But before we do that, we're all in agreement Jay Billis, you've been the voice of reason, really, for an impeccable amount of time. Salute to you, master. Respect. But we can't arrest everybody and start drawing up citations.

No, citations take a long time. I mean, citations take a long time to write up. They do. They really do, yeah.

18,000 of them. You bury them in paperwork. Then you're going back and forth like Samson and Cody. You give me an answer 24 hours.

They're out of here.

Samson.

What if you give away pizza outside right after the game. You're like, We're giving away pizza, but you only have five minutes to get it. Everyone's going to want to go get that pizza.

Let me speak directly to the fan here for just a moment. Fan, basketball fan, football fan, whoever you are, you never look dumber than when you're storming a court or a field. Your place is in the stands. That's what your ticket entitles you to. You have no right to storm a court, to celebrate in the stands. Stand up, applaud, high five your neighbor, chug a beer, stay off the court because that's the players and coaches.

It'd be like if after a good meal, we stormed the kitchen. No, we're not doing that.

Celebrate the cook.

That's a good idea.

But what if you didn't expect it to be a good meal? What if you thought it would be a bad meal? It ends up being one of the most memorable meals you've ever I mean, Greg's right.

It is trespassing.

It is. You guys are lame. Storming the court is awesome. I know it's dangerous, so let's just put up the shot clock and bam, I already fixed the problem. But my core memories of college, my favorite moments ever were storming the field after I would be gone. What's so great about it? Because when Iowa beats Ohio, when Iowa scores 55 points in any game, we have to storm the field. It's just a rule.

Even if you lose.

I do feel like if they put up on the Jumbotron, storm the court in 30, 20 29, 28.

You have to storm it when the players are storming the court.

People love a countdown clock.

Now I'm getting all lathered up. I'm going to storm that court with force. People love a countdown clock. I just think it's small town privilege. In Miami, it doesn't happen all that much because we think we're going to get shot.

I mean, that part-Shot?

Yes. Yeah, the cops. Yes. If you try to storm the field in mass at Hard Rock Stadium, it's going to go badly.

It's not polite campus security. It's Miami police.

Miami versus Duke.

Miami police to shoot players on football fields all the time.

They all got arm sleeves, man. I'm not judging, but...

I stormed the court at Miami when they beat Duke a few years ago. That was the oldest one out there. I'm like, What am I doing?

I don't think we stormed the court. I think we casually walked onto the court once we won the ACC last year. That's even more pathetic. Just a casual schroll. We're a blue blood. We're a blue blood. We're a blue blood. We're expected to do this.

How does that look, a casual schroll?

Are you whistling?

Just a milling about.

It wasn't a court storming.

It was a milling.

You guys were loiterers. It wasn't the case. On the court.

In fact, Coachell had to be like, Come on, guys, it's okay.

I'd rather be a trespasser than a loiter any day of the week.

It's just blue bloods carry themselves a certain way. We act like we've been there before.

The technology does exist to electrify the court.Yeah, that's true. Hear me out. Hear him out. I'm not talking about something that would be extremely dangerous.

Nothing lethal.

Like a dog collar. Right, like a dog collar. Keep the dog in the yard. Like a mild stun gun feeling. You would feel a jarring sensation in your feet, and you would You have to limp off the court because it would be terrifying to you. Plus, there would be that sound. The players haven't left yet. The mosquitoes would then get electrocuted a little bit.

No, because-Their shoes would be programmed to not be electrified.

The players and the coaches would all know to clear the court. Then 10 seconds after the game ends, the court is electrified, and all the fans who have stormed the court are having a terrible, unpleasant situation. And guess what? What? Next big win, they don't do that anymore. I like that.

Electricute.

No, Greg is on to something.

Lightly. Like a raptor paddock. So more than beyond the take where Jay Bellis has taken it, no, it can't merely be arrest. Let's go beyond that. Electricute the customer.

Not electrocute. I'd rather get zapped.

Wait, no, I just want to make sure I got this right. At the time of greatest joy, because we have won as a one-point underdog against the school that has a reputation, we got great joy. The problem with court rushing is going to be solved right now as we rush for our greatest joy into straight electrocution.

No, not electrocution.

Our home fan.

Just a shock.

You're missing the point. You're misrepresenting this intentionally.

It's enough just to get you to go back to the stand.

Greg, the technology exists, I believe, and I know exactly how you do it. It's not you electrify the court because then you're going to zap the players, the referees, whoever, or even security if they happen to be pushed on the court. What you do is when they come in, you give them one of those concert bracelets that change lights at different songs or whatever, but there's a zapping mechanism in it. They have no idea. They're none the wiser. So they go out there during the game, songs play, the lights are changing. Everyone's excited. Like, wow, this is such a cool bracelet. I'm not going to take it off. You win the game, you go on, and you have one of those secret little dog electrocution wires around the court. They don't even know as soon as they cross that.

Just a little. Yeah, I like that. Billy's thinking it's humane electrocution.

I'm a problem solver.

What about you get whatever is popular in a certain market? If If you were in Iowa, what's the best fast food or just a restaurant that would get everyone super excited? Free cheeseburgers outside right now for anyone that first-I said that.

You did? Pizza. You said pizza.

You said Martin.

Okay, a good idea.

I don't watch college basketball with sound on. I'm either at the game or it's on a second or third television. I don't know what Jay Billis' takes on this have been, but I imagine I've seen games where this happens that he's on the call of and he's not calling for the arrest of people as it's happening. I saw Dan Patrick have a take on this. A lot of this opining that you're seeing on these networks, when they show promos for Big Monday and the conference championships, they're constantly showing court storming. It's a part of the culture. It is a celebrated part of the culture that is perpetuated by the big television networks. For them to do an about face is a bit of a bad faith argument. Be part of the solution. Don't just try to arrest people one day to another because your star player decided to fake something.

Just zap them. Lucy, I do want to get into the serious part of this, and we will in a moment in the next segment, because it should be pretty newsworthy that the NCA has collapsed, fallen to its knees. We should probably talk about this. But before I do so, I just want to tell the audience, Mayday, a local Miami band here, now that I have your attention for just a moment, a band that this show supports. They are asking for the help of the community around them because of some things that have gone weird in the real estate economy down here in Miami as we become the least affordable housing market in the United States.

Did you check with Samson on this?

I did not. No, I'm just trying to help Mayday out a local band that has supported us at every turn. Just put up on the screens here so that people can help Mayday, a local band. Their music is great. If you want to help them out because they're a creative band that wants to stay dirty Miami.

If you're just listening, you can just search online, GoFundMe Mayday. It'll come up, and they're looking for a new studio.

Thank you.

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Don Leba That thing.

I love that sound. Is that a basoon? What is that sound? It's a tuba. Is it a tuba? I believe it's a tuba. Are you sure? Yes. I would be very interested to find out. Really? Let's get a musicologist on. I think it's a basoon.

I love woodwinds.

Who do we know that's... Who's the music version of Ron McGill that we could have on? I think it's a basoon. To hear that sound and to idea it. Stugatz. I mean, I heard that, and I think I was the butt of that joke.

That was Billy.

No, prior to that. I'm going in chronological order here. Yes. Keep up, Dan.

This is the Dan Levatard Show with the Stugatz.

I believe over the last few years, if you've been paying attention in this space to the business of college football, I believe that Mike Ryan, Lucy, and Jessica, who's not even here today, have reported very strongly and earnestly and correctly and fairly about what the business of the NCAA is becoming as the whole thing, like shakes and clatters. God, it's got $7.8 billion in TV revenue. Espn is going to be able to rent out these games. They're going to be using these bodies on the sport that we love, and there's going to be moral conundrums everywhere, and the prices are skyrocketing because everybody knows how much money is involved. Mike and Lucy and Jessica have stood out in their reporting about the commerce of this, showing you the insides of what the business looks like in ways that are funny, creative, illuminating reporting, and honestly reported, expertly reported. Correct me if I'm wrong, are you guys willing to break the story or someone else breaking it, that the NCAA is now dead?

Well, this happened several days ago, so the story has very much already been broken. But we're doing best to get to it in a moderately timely manner. The NCAA is dead. You've heard it here, not first or second or third, but like hundreds down the last- Okay, but I'd like to have the original reporting on this that confirms it's not an insignificant thing that's happened over the last couple of weeks? No. Basically, what happened, and this was Friday of last week, was the NCAA lost a lawsuit against the state of Virginia and Tennessee. This one happened specifically in Tennessee. That pretty much opens up the floodgates with NIL saying that The NCAA is not able to restrict any NIL payments from boosters or collectives or whatever that could be. It's pretty much a free market. The NCAA really has only been around to say, You can't pay players and you can't transfer, and we're going to make everything crazy difficult for everyone. So this pretty much feels like what's the final blow to the NCAA. They don't really do anything anymore.

They hired a former governor to, I guess, make enroads with politicians to see if Congress can actually get involved here. Not a great time to get Congress to do anything at the moment. So this is happening at a pretty tumultuous time in our country where you have a politician in place, basically, to have the government do what they can't. The ruling really isn't as big a deal as they make it out to be. They essentially rule that you can now use NIL to attract players. Wow, no one's done that before. I'm speaking for everybody else. At the University of Miami, you agree to come here, and then we talk NIL. We're the outlier, pretty much. But it It doesn't really mean much other than solidify that we are now acknowledged to be in the Wild West, but I am not in favor of this ruling. I may surprise you with that. I think we need to have a governing body in place because what's going to happen is football will get more and more crazy and more money will be spent. And we're going to ignore, as we have with this, because I haven't seen the think pieces on this, really, the non-revenue sports may die or be suspended until we have a solution.

And say all you want about the NCAA, but they are necessary when it comes to non-revenue sports. Who's going to be organizing softball, baseball, track and field? I really think that we are fast-approaching a part in college athletics where we're not going to have non-revenue sports until we figure this out.

Well, this happened quick, right? Because I thought we saw... Look, man, when we talked all about this business terrain, please Tell me if I have any part of this wrong. They were always warning us, If basketball and football are going to be that much more valuable than everything else, they will have no responsibility to keep everything else alive. And of course, at the time of greatest greed, all of the top is going to go where the money goes. And yes, you're going to get a whole lot of athletics are going to get undercut by the business of this. They warned us this was coming in 20 years. It's gotten here like right now, correct? Do I have anything wrong there?

No, it's happening too fast, and it's happening so that there isn't a replacement in place. What is the alternative to the NCAA when it comes to these other sports? Football is great. I give a lot to football, but I give a lot to a lot of athletics. And football only takes up, really, on my calendar, 20% of my time. Most of the sports that I attend with my family are non-revenue sports, and I'm really afraid that they're just going to fall by the wayside here as we prioritize the revenue.

You've already seen non-revenue sports get cut. When COVID hit. That was a lot of the first things to go from these athletic departments: cutting swimming, cutting tennis. Mike Ryan makes an amazing point where the way I think this should be done is there should be a separate governing body for college football because that's a completely different animal than college wrestling, then college softball.

Probably the CFP.

Yeah, but they can't do anything. They don't know what's going on, and they're ruining that, too. So maybe they shouldn't be in charge. Someone, not the CFP, should be in charge of college football. We're in a scary time where you're going to see these non-revenue sports dip. There's also the question with this NIL money coming directly, where does Title IX factor into this?

I would do that, by the way. I would be the college football commissioner. Wow. I believe I'm suited.One.

Of your credentials. The executive producer of this show. This is great.

I'm doing both at the same time. You're right about it. I'm glad you mentioned Title IX because Title IX ranks above the NCAA because it's a national law. If not for Title IX, there would be no such thing as women's rowing at the University of Miami and men's golf and golf and women's tennis. I mean, almost every woman's sport below basketball would not exist.

At the University of Miami, there are people that are really trying to push for a softball program, and you can't be pushing for it at a worse time right now with all this uncertainty.

But forgive me, Mike, because you have been a bit of a protector. You've been shouting without seeming hysterical on, you can't just let all the governance walls collapse. Then it's going to become such free commerce that it's going to ruin the sport very quickly.

I guess my Miami relationship has held against me. I do think that there should be some order. I don't like that it's arbitrary depending on which state that you're operating in. And I don't necessarily want the government involved. I just want adults in the room. Right now, we have a rudderless ship, and now it's all out in the open. And it's not sexy when you're fantasy booking a 14-team college football playoff and you're hyping up EA's next big release, they're not going to be releasing track and field, EA's track and field. And These are really essential programs that benefit the student-athletes, that give people access to college that in some cases may otherwise not have it. It's being forgotten here as everyone just grave dances.

There's a pretty easy solution to some of this, and it would be pay college football coaches less, but that will never, ever in a million years happen. I'm sorry I brought it up. My bad, my bad, my bad. No, no, no.

The injustice of the entity that's making all the revenue not really paying for the labor. I mean, they do in some institutional things. They provide these games and they organize them. But really, the people funding NIL, they're not the schools for the most part. There's some states here and there. But the grave injustice that we all rebelled against is still there.

I know who to put in charge. There, right there. The son of nepertism. There it is. Put him in charge. Dan Levatard.

Here's the chant. Are you ready? I'm speaking to the rest of the country. You say who, we say who.

Stugats.

You say, Who? We say, Who? You say, Who? Come on, Ron. We say, Who? This is the Dan Levatard show with the Stugatz.

Stugatz, I don't know if the audience is going to take this bit of information and assume that all of the money that has been pouring into the Ron McGill endowment because people just trust he's going to He's going to take great care of taking care of the animals and try to remove all the paperwork and everything else. So you either trust him to be decent and have decent people running his things, or he's going to get a new car and a Cadillac as he has, better clothes. And now soon, he and I are running off to Africa again. I want to get to Africa where it is that I got engaged to my wife, and now I'm going to have a personal safari tour with him, and I'm assuming it's all paid for by the endowment, by the listeners.

Or the merch store.

Or the merch store. I don't know who's paying all of this, but I am very pleased to announce that I'm going to have a personal tour guide in Africa with Ron McGill. How great is that going to be?

It's going to be epic. That word is sometimes overused, but this is truly going to be epic. Everything from Victoria Falls, in Kruger National Park, to lepers, lions, elephants, rhinos, Buffalo. It's going to be amazing. Not to mention private chefs, tents that make a five-star hotel in New York look like a bunk house. It's going to be like nothing you've ever experienced in your life. I pulled out the best of the best. We're staying in Derek and Beverly Joubert's private suite in Botswana, which is unbelievable. This is going to be like nothing you've ever seen.

What's the dynamic of this trip? You're going to show Dan around Africa.

Is Ron working?

Yeah. Is he paying you? Is he paying for your expenses? Is he paying you to do this? What's the dynamic?

No, No, no, no, no. No, he's not paying for me to do this. This is a pleasure and a privilege for me, not as much for him as it is for his beautiful wife.

There's no way a tent is nicer than a hotel room.

Okay. Wait until I send you the pictures, Billy G.

Billy G, huh? Cam Newton status. I mean, a yurt. Are you staying in a yurt? Because I have stayed in a yurt that's nicer than a hotel room. I have. I've done that.

Trust me. I wanted to just send you guys... When we get back, we'll send you pictures, and it It'll be father for social media forever.

Is Dan building the tent?

To be clear, none of the endowment money is actually going to any of what it is. Thank you, Dan.

I appreciate.

But the merch store money is.

No, none of the money. All of the money is being kept in all the right places. You either believe that Ron McGill is an honorable man or you do not, or you believe that he is paying for trips around the world with listener funds. I don't believe he would do that. That would be a terrible fraud at the end of his great and distinguished career. So I'm going to trust him with this one.

When's this happening? Just to make sure we have the PTO on the calendar because that seemed to be an issue last week.

I don't usually tell dates because that tells you when you're going to be out of town and people watching and say, Hey, that's the time to go to- Security breach.

Because he's been in Miami all his life. Ron McGill will tell you the same thing Mike will tell you. We won't storm a court here because the police will break our legs, and that's understood.

They'll shoot you is what Mike said.

No, but it's understood from a young age. No, they're way ahead of the times on security measures. We will not rush in the field because why we'll end up in the hospital for 10 days?

I aspire to have a compound like Ron, where he's afraid to say when he's out of town.

Also, in all fairness, the people of Africa have asked that I do not disclose when Dan is going to be there because we know how- Too many hippos in one spot. The crew are, and they could get out there and try to get a Dan.

A continent asked not to disclose where Dan was going to be.

No one asked you, Ron.

Poachers? No, but they did.

They did. They told me, Listen, we don't want to make it known. We don't want to be here because- It's an airbrush, you wear a cap on some- In both season, what are we afraid of?

A rich poacher's wall.

Just saying, the guy draws a crowd, and we don't want crowds. We want peace and tranquility out there in Africa.

Going at the Hippos.

He's going to see lots of Dan Levatards out there, that's for sure.

You guys have my- I want to meet this poacher.

He's got a Mike Francesa Diet Coke on his wall.

You and Valarie got room in the tent for me because I've never been to Africa, and I would really like to join you on that trip. Tell me off there when it starts.

Their tent that they're staying in has room for the entire crew, and you guys wouldn't even have to see each other.

Oh, wow.

Thank you, Dan. I believe the suite, the tent suite is 3,000 square feet.

Wow. Seriously?

That's crazy.

You still call it a tent? There has to be a different word.

Because the only thing they tent about it is canvas walls. We're talking about hardwood floors, incredible Roman tubs, Jacuzis. I mean, it's unbelievable. Oh, my gosh.

Ron, I had sent to the people who work over here because I saw it the other day and I couldn't believe the size of an anaconda that I'm assuming was real. I think it was the biggest that has ever been seen anywhere. I'm assuming in the age of artificial intelligence that you're able to verify things that real and are not real. When you saw this video I speak of, were you somewhat- I had not seen the video.

What I'm looking at right now is a red-face yucari. That's not an anaconda. It's a red-face yucari, like when Stugatz gets really mad.

Chris Cody, why are you making faces at me?

No, I'm making face at the video team because they're doing the thing where it's a side-by-side. And before it was Benjamin Franklin and Larry David, and now it's Monkey.

That's for you. Oh, is that what it is? Okay, so we're still making the joke. When you were onboarded by Chris Cody, did he say anything about how you look because it's visually startling to everyone every time you make an appearance.

I saw him smirking.

I did look at him and go, Hey, did you lose a bet? I thought he was George Washington, but I guess he's Larry David.

My larger point, though, Ron, is just the idea of an anaconda that is the size of three or four Shaquille O'Neills stacked on top of each other, how is that a thing that can be real?

That can be real. I will say an anaconda is the largest snake in the world. It's not the longest. The longest snake in the world, the world record is 33 feet, 3 inches, a reticulated Python. I'm looking at the video now. It looks pretty real. But again, with all this artificial intelligence, I don't know what to believe anymore. I saw a video the other day of a great white shark on a beach. It looked so real to me. Then they told me, Oh, it's artificial intelligence. There is an outstanding award of over $100,000 for any snake 30 feet or longer that can be found today. So that's a $100,000 snake there if they're saying it's 30 feet long.

But why? Why is that a reward?

Because nobody believes that it exists anymore. And they've actually created this reward from a legitimate source that if you can produce a 30-foot snake, you will be paid $100,000.

Who do you turn that into? A dead snake? You just have a snake carcass and you take it somewhere?

Theoretically, yeah. As long as you can legitimately prove that it was that long, I'm hoping they would not kill it. But people do a lot of things for $100,000. I don't I think the $100,000 is based on a live snake. It just has to be based on a real snake.

Ron, can you explain to us what that eats? What's something like that? How long that would take for a snake to get that large? What is that? That anaconda.

That anaconda is an ambush predator, and it's going to feed primarily, probably on copybarras, which are the largest, world's largest rodent, fairly common throughout the Amazon, Amazon Basin. They are an aquatic type of rodent. They swim quite a bit. Like I said, a large rodent, that would be a very good meal. They will also feed on deer, various types of deer that come to drink in the water. Again, they just will place themselves on the bank of the water, generally speaking, waiting for something to come and get a drink, and they'll get it that way, or they'll slowly track it down. Animals take common paths. They create paths. Even though they're in the wild, they'll take the same path almost every day as part of their routine. Snakes can smell that, and they'll wait there, and they'll camouflage themselves along that path until the animal unknowingly walks by and then wraps his coils around him, suffocates him, swallows them whole.

The great white shark that you saw that washed up ashore was not artificial intelligence. That was a real thing. A 15-foot pregnant great white shark washed up on- That was another one, but there's another one.

There's another one. I saw that one.

Okay. Yes. A bunch of local news outlets. It was a fishing hook found in the mouth of a great Great White Shark. They're still doing studies to find out as to why this pregnant great white shark washed up ashore. We are getting more and more Great White Shark sightings. We are seeing Humpback whales off the Coast of Florida as well. There have been killer whales spotted down here. Not that the occasional great white shark sighting hasn't been an occasional thing down here, but they're becoming more and more routine. What is happening in our coastal waters that is getting all this new marine life?

Well, hopefully it's good news. Hopefully, the populations are increasing, and hopefully there's more out there. But it also can have something to do with climate change. As temperatures are changing in the waters, populations of fish are shifting, and the prey that feeds on those fish is also shifting. So you might just be seeing a shift in populations, where you might not see as many in places they were previously seen and seeing more, and now these- That's what I want to ask you about, because these are generally marine life that are spotted in colder water temperatures.

And when you say climate change, well, why the heck would they want to come down here when the ocean water sometimes is that of a sauna? But this could all be migratory and predatory?

Exactly. Migratory and predatory. And again, Mike, I think animals have the ability to adapt to things. Maybe these animals that for generations have been restricted to colder water climates, all of a sudden now it's starting to say, Well, you know what? We're getting warmer and warmer. We're going to start getting ourselves introduced to this warmer, warmer climate. As each successive generation comes along, we might be seeing animals like the polar bears. I think within several generations, you're going to start seeing polar bears come inland and start hunting inland and start competing with grizzly bears because getting out on the ice is no longer an option for them. I don't think they're going to go, quote, unquote, extinct, but what they're going to do is they're probably going to come in. I believe there's already been documented cases of them hybridizing with grizzly bears, and you're going to come up with the adaptation of basically another species of bear that comes from the polar bear. Not the true polar bear we know today, but not a polar bear either.

What a horror that is you're describing You're describing a future where there are bear wars right before they come for the humans, where the polar bears and the grizzly bears are going to fight over land and they're going to look at humans and they're like, Those are going to be delicious, too. That's the Apocalypse you're describing in our future.

There you go. New movie, Planet of the Bears.

Ron, I was driving home and I stopped at the Fort Pierre Service Plaza, and for whatever reason, they had animal facts printed along the ceiling. One of them was, Scientists estimate that 91% of ocean species have yet to be classified. That's just made up, right?

I've said this many times, Billy. We know less about the ocean than we know about the moon.

But that number is just... They just said, Let's pick a big number, right? There's That's the way that you could know that you don't know 91 % of something. I think it's fair to say that they can extrapolate that just from where the places that they haven't been able to discover, the places they haven't have access to.

Looking at things, coral reefs, They're like the rainforest of the water. I mean, there's so much diversity, so much that we haven't discovered yet. Even in the coral reefs we get to, there's stuff we haven't discovered yet. In a rainforest, listen, in a rainforest, we get 50 % of all of our pharmaceuticals from rainforest plants, yet we've only thoroughly examined 10% of the plants in a rainforest. So there's 90% of the plants that we haven't examined yet, where we got 50% from 10%, what's in that other 90%? Same thing with the ocean, man. A lot of numbers.

We've told us.

Made up.

A lot of numbers. That's it.

Scott Steiner, man.

You know what? Billy and Chris Cody got it exactly right. Yeah, numbers, numbers, numbers. Shut up, zoo man. Greg Cody has a question.

Well, no, I have a question first. Sorry to cut you off. Did you hear, Ron, about Charlotte, the stingray in North Carolina, who hasn't had a maid in eight years and is now impregnated and no one knows how if it was one of the sharks that's in the tank or not?

Not that no one knows how, and it's not one of the sharks in the tank. It's something called parthenogenesis. It's not uncommon in fish, in some reptiles, where they're actually able to fertilize their own eggs without having a mate.

Like Jesus. How about that?

So that happens. Listen, there are other animals that have what's called sperm storage. For instance, the box turtle can store sperm for up to seven years. In other words, breed in 2010 and have babies from that one breeding for every year, up to 2017, by storing the sperm. I mean, wildlife is incredible. When you What do you think about this stuff. And what it does is it removes the necessity for these animals to meet every time. So when populations get thin or they spread out, you still are able to keep the numbers up because you don't have to meet the guy to get impregnated. You can keep producing young.

Ron, New York City is mourning the death of celebrity, Owl Flacko.

Oh, God, I didn't hear that. He died?

Yeah, he died. And he ran into a building, and now they're investigating whether he was killed.

Wait, who went to a building? Hold on. He got flued.

He didn't run into a building. He's suggesting foul play.

I'll go. Yeah, I meant he flew into a building. Bye, Billy.

Fly out of here. I enjoyed it. Fly out of here. That's awful, especially since... I mean, no, there it... Look, what?

Yeah. Look, two minutes for a good joke. No.

I didn't know Flack would die.

I'm sorry. I didn't mean to break it to you. You know everything.

You're the animal expert.

All right, this is why I'm mortified about Just what happened right now, okay?

I don't own the problem. Oh, there it is.

I saw that one coming.

Greg Cody, bitch.

I got anything. Lewis, feeling the hot hand. Stop talking, Lewis.

I do feel bad that I broke that terrible news to Ron.

No, but this is why that rings insincer. I'll tell you why this rings in, sincere. All of this was very poorly handled for a number of reasons. First, I believe Ron McGill to be the foremost national voice there is right now, there aren't very many of these over time, speaking to two cultures about the protection and care of the animals, and that you guys would break this news to him, which has been in the news. I'm sorry that it was delivered that way, Ron, because it's been in the news, and I just assume that this news had received, that you'd received it because the people in New York are hurt by what's happened here, that this owl has died.

Understandably so, and in all fairness, I haven't been watching the news the last couple of days. I've been swamped in work. I get home and I just fall asleep.

Why is this owl so famous?

Well, he escaped or was released from the Bronx Zoo, a Central Park zoo. It's a Eurasian eagle owl. It's one of the largest owls in the world. This happened over a year I believe. People were worried about him, that he was going to die. Oh, my God. All he did is find out how to eat rats and squirrels and live off of the abundancy of these vermin in New York City. So he became somewhat of a folk hero and was doing very, very well. The big fear was that something would happen. Someone would shoot him, someone would hurt him. He'd be hit by a vehicle or a car. Or God forbid, now he's crashed into a window, I guess. I have to look into this, but now I'm really bummed. I'm very depressed.

I'm sorry that we delivered this news that way to you because you guys trampled on it. On that part.

Is an owl flying into a building like if a human dies with the train tracks? It's like, it had to be their fault. Oh, come on. I feel like the other birds are looking around.

Some birds can't see the windows.

Chris, let me educate you on something. Come on. I try to tell people all the time, when you have big sliding doors or windows in your home, please use these little stickers or little markers so that birds can see them because what birds see is a reflection of what's behind that. You see, that hurts.

I say who?

The bottom line is birds will find it because they see the reflection, and they hit that, they don't realize it's not the forest behind them or the sky behind them. And they hit that. You know how many millions of birds die every year from hitting windows?

Billy doesn't care about the animals. It's been made clear by his chance.

It's what Flacko would have wanted.

All right, get out of here.

I say who.

Get out of here. You say who.

They say who.

I'm really... I'm sad, guys. I'm sad, and I feel badly for Flacko. I feel badly for you guys making light of this. Making light. I hope you sleep well at night.

It's wrong. Ron's on the right side of this. These are assholes, Ron. I'm on your side. I'm 100% on your side, Ron. They deliver that news to you, and then are total assholes about it.

Well, Ron cares so much that he didn't know the news. I know, but- You figured he had an alert on the phone.

No, but we deliver the news to him and then he's delivered that way. It's brutal. I'm done, guys.

I'm done.

Check in on your friends, everyone.

By the way, you're not... Listen, the tent you're talking about, it's got mahogany antiques in It's not a real tent. Do it in a real tent.

What you guys just did, wretched, what you just did, Duran McGill.

In fairness, the death was four days ago. I spent three days in morning, and now I'm celebrating the life of Flacko with a little bit of humor.

It's the JJ Watts of Tent. I mean, seriously, minimalistic. Get out of here. You guys are acting like you're going out in the wild. You're staying in a ritz. Spring.

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