I want to let you know I have tour dates. I'll be in Halifax, Nova Scotia on August 11. Atlanta, Georgia April 5, St. Louis on April 19. Get all your tickets through theovon.com tour as well. We've got the new. My favorite hoodies are back in the merch shop. I love these. These are my just most favorite. If you want to check those out, we've got vintage cheese back in as well@theovanstore.com. Thank you always for your support. Today's guest is standing on Benny. He is one of the funniest guys that I know. He's a creator, an entertainer. He's a damn savant. I love getting to spend time with him. He has a new show on YouTube called could have been House. And that's all you need to know. Today's guest is Drew ski shine.

I'll sit and tell you my story.

Shine on me and I will find a song I've been singing way too.

Fast on the runaway train shit.

It safe shit, too. That's all gender.

Yeah. You know about this? This ain't medicated, is it? This ain't medicated, is it?

No good, baby.

It's old. This one old up.

Oh, yeah, this in good.

What you use this for? What you usually use this for?

I spray this shit under the hood. If it gets tight under there, bro, get that air filter. You know what I'm saying?

That's what it feels like. A WD 40 oil. It's like really oily.

Remember when that AC belt under the car, we rolling Z? All right.

Okay. Yeah. That's funny.

Yeah, man. I like a little bit of lotion, too. And you all use what is the.

Average amount black person probably use about. At least maybe about 1000 bottles of lotions a year. Not to expose us, but I'm just saying that's typical for a black family. It has probably a family. A family unit probably go through like 1000 a year. Oh, my God. Depending on if it's Vaseline.

Probably cut that in half because Vaseline is more full.

Yeah, it's more oily. It can get the job done for a couple of days. But yeah, for a typical black family.

Probably run through about that in some brother. You got to probably spray some WD 40 on it. You know what I'm saying? I've seen some guys, you and this brother.

Word is crazy. All right, I get it. Yes. What brothers, you know, that use the oily stuff. What brothers have you run deeply. Okay. That's the oily lotion.

That's like oh, I've seen a brother maybe been in the wind or something a little bit and he ducks around a building and he'll just, that dude, he'll work as a door hand for the next year if he needs to. But sometimes people need more. I notice I need some.

When do you know? Because I feel like white people, they don't use anything on their lips, so their lips start to bleed, crack up and what is, I kind of wanted to come here and ask questions like that because a lot of people are scared to ask these type of questions. It's like, what is some of the white girls you go to like a college football game and a lot of their lips are bleeding cracks.

Yeah.

What is that?

Yeah. Well, I think one of the good things about being black or off black, I don't know what some of the varieties are now, but I think one of the values in it is that you get early signs of dry skin. Like we don't find out to the.

Last till it start bleeding.

We find out the last, we find out when you're trying to enjoy like a hot dog or something and you can't do it and you say, damn, it's too late.

Yeah.

Because that hits us hard. So I think that's a big thing in the white community is cracked skin. Yeah, our stuff gets cracked up bad. Good to see you, man.

Good to see you too, man. I was so excited to come up here. I was telling all my boys, I'm like, dog, this shit every time we link up with you is fucking amazing, man. Even if it's just at a fucking football game. Yeah, it's crazy, bro.

Yeah, I love seeing your crew, bro.

Yeah, man.

You'll always bring a good time, man. Yeah, I just got back from Australia, man. How was, man? They got, it's nice. Yeah, well, first of all, everybody's really friendly.

Yeah, I've heard that though. Justin Bieber told me that. Really everybody out there is super nice. It's like nobody is mean at all. Like not a mean soul.

Can't even imagine even a know that's a worse he'll do. But they chilling.

You see kangaroos and shit out there. I heard like the snakes are huge out there. All type of shit.

You see a lot of shit. You see a lot of, they got kangaroos, bats, wombats, and even the spiders.

They said like super huge.

Oh yeah, you'll see a spider and you know he's up to some fucking shit. He'll be over there with a couple of his arms just fucking counting some money or whatever, I think. Yeah. You see a lot of dangerous shit. Not a lot of. It's mostly white over there. Yeah, it's a white.

No brothers.

No brothers, bro, you couldn't. If you even ask where a brother is, they don't even know.

You speaking another language.

They'll send you to, like, a fire, like, recovery ward or something. Like, they don't have. The closest thing they got is somebody that was in a three alarm blaze over there. Like, somebody.

I get it. Yeah. That's funny.

If you all went over there, bro, if you guys went over, they probably.

Would treat us like royalty.

I mean, they would.

Or maybe the opposite.

No, they would love it.

Okay.

But you all would be a special attraction over there. You all would be a damn museum.

What's the word you're looking for? Zoo. You didn't want to say it. You was going towards it.

No, I think no.

Bar teeth was looking like you're about to say zoo. I just wanted to jump in there and get.

No, man. Maybe a cage free. Okay.

Yeah.

Like a display. Say that, dude. A display for unique, special humans.

I get it, but.

Yeah, that's crazy, dude. I'm not joking, bro.

That's insane. They probably don't see no black people over there.

I know it's crazy, and I don't know why.

Yeah, no, I think all I've heard from there, they say, is beautiful women. They said the animals are crazy. They said the insects are super enlarged. Other than that, I haven't heard other than kangaroo Jack. When I watched the movie Kangaroo Jack, Anthony Anderson. That was like a black brother I knew about. He went to Australia.

And he's a black safari man.

No, he is a black american actor.

Oh, nice.

He's like, comedic actor.

Oh, there we go.

Yeah, he went to Australia.

Kangaroo jet.

He went to Australia. Look at him. Yeah, you see the outcome? I think he was the only brother on set, too.

Even the animals was surprised. Look. Even. Is that fucking. Oh, that's.

Anthony Anderson.

I was going to say. I said, that dude looks like a Mexican Anthony.

Those are the early dreadlock stage, right?

That animal was on some. He's often perk 30s.

You got to watch that. If you haven't seen. That's an amazing movie, bro.

Kangaroo Jack.

Oh, man. Yeah, you got to watch that.

I haven't seen that. What have I been watching? I've been watching Griselda. Have you seen that? It's on Netflix. It's about a woman that is a drug dealer, and she is, like, the best, like, she's like the El Chapo, kind of. Yeah, but. Yeah, El Chapo. But a woman. There she is. Damn. Now I'm going to say this.

Is that the same?

That's the same. That's the woman in the film.

Yeah, they casted a bad bitch.

The casting definitely went in a more visually vibrant direction, I think. But that lady looks like a gangster.

Yeah, she don't play that shit, bro.

It's so good. Yeah, she is a boss.

I got to watch that, dude.

It's so good, man. And you know who that is?

That's the lady from the fucking show with everybody in the house.

Yes. Modern family.

Modern family. Yeah. She's bad as fuck, too.

My God.

Somebody said on the Internet that I.

Would like to be her brazier.

Somebody said on the Internet that she's been holding on to her accent. Like, she can actually speak very good English. But she might be putting on.

Oh, she's trying to, but it's good.

I mean, it's sexy to me.

I like it, you know? I know a little bit, man.

Like, what? This is all about cultural learning. That's what I'm here for, man.

Advancement.

Yeah, cultural advancement.

Yeah.

You get it.

Thanks, man. Yeah, man. What else? I want to. Oh, I was watching that Wendy Williams.

Oh. Documentary.

Yeah. You see?

Yeah, it's sad. I've seen clips of it. I can't watch shit like that. It's sad, though, man. After she dropped on stage, I stopped watching everything from her.

It's heartbreaking.

Yeah. She was doing her live show and she just collapsed.

She did? I didn't know.

Yeah, she fell backwards. Don't pull the clip up. Fuck it. Pull it up. Pull up the clip. It might be on YouTube. Yeah, Wendy Williams. She dropped on her show, man. She dropped.

Oh, I didn't know that. I don't know if I saw that or not.

But it was sad, though. It's not. They made memes and stuff up.

I don't know.

It was a lot of fun. Let's get started.

Our first caress. Oh, that's enough, man. That's a Statue of liberty. Did you have a stroke, you think?

Not sure, brother. Let's just pray for. Right?

Yeah, because. Yeah, it seemed in the show she's having a. It looks like it's a lot of alcohol.

Yeah, it could be a lot of things, I think mental health.

Because, see, look, there's even sometimes where I have friends, they'll get so they drink so much.

There's no friends. Your friends don't.

This has a Michael Myers vibe to it. Like, if Michael Myers tried to pop off and be like, hey, I'll have a Tito's and soda.

Of all pictures, guys. Come on. Of all pictures. We were saying a prayer.

We're trying to pray.

Yeah, we're saying a prayer, man.

But some people, too. I notice sometimes when you get so drunk, your eyes try to leave your body because it can't handle.

I noticed that sometimes it happens to me when I close my eyes. My eyes, they start to roll. They just start rolling on their own because I don't know what it is, but honestly, you just start getting the spins and you feel better with your eyes open when you're super drunk like that than closed.

Oh, yeah.

You know what I'm saying?

Totally. Yeah. So I think at a certain point with your bot, like, if you drink so much, your eyes are like, hey, we don't want to be this drunk. We getting out of here. We on our way out. But they've had.

When's the last time you drank? You don't drink?

No. I'm almost two years off of drinking and cocaine.

Cocaine? How was that, man? Cocaine is a tough thing, man. That's like jumping ship. That's hardcore.

It was good, man. It was good.

Okay. I was expecting a different answer.

No, it was good, man. The tough part was that I couldn't handle the day after, man.

Okay.

That's when it was too much.

Yeah. What is the usual? Because I see girls at the club, they do it all the time and shit. I don't indulge. But what's the after effects? Like, what does the next day look like after cocaine?

Well, it gets to be like 06:00 a.m. And you're still doing cocaine. And you know, the next day, regardless.

Of anything, you're just going to be up.

Yeah, you're still up. And so, you know, the next day is a wrap. Now it's a wrap. So now anything you had for that day planned is done, right? Because you could have just gone out at 10:00 to meet some people for a beer, and now you weren't going to do nothing. But now it's 06:00 a.m. So everything you had that day, you.

Have to try to jump out.

Like you said.

I noticed people on cocaine, like, they have this thing where they like to stare at you and shit. They're wide awake. They pay attention to every small detail. You can lift your finger and they're like. It's like a paranoid thing for them.

Oh, it'll make you nasty, too.

Yeah.

In what way? It'll make you damn cocaine.

Like, sexual nasty.

Oh, yeah. It'll make you just eat a stranger's ass through a screen door, baby. That shit will make you a good.

Way to describe it.

It'll make you be a bad guy.

You've eaten a stranger.

I have not, brother.

That's pretty much what you just saw me.

Look, I have not done it.

You're over it. You haven't done it in two years.

I get it.

It's been two years. I get it. But listen, at least it was through a screen door because you needed some type of protection. I get it. The next day, prison condom, maybe?

That screen door, baby. What is that, mesh? What is that, metal mesh?

Look up the material for what a screen door is.

But, yeah, man. Because sometimes you see, well, some people, they used to have fiberglass.

Fiberglass, aluminum. Yeah, that probably is good. That's strong enough to protect any STDs.

Oh, for sure. I'll say this. They used to have a thing a long time ago. And this is unfortunate because some people. Their eyes are really. Some people have, like, any belly button. Some people have Audi. Yeah, some people got, like, audi eyes kind of.

Yeah, my aunt kind of. Well, not like that. Not that bad. But my aunt has eyes like that.

And this is. I think some of this is in the black community.

No, I don't think this is in the black community thing.

You don't think so?

No, I think that's just one black guy that has eyes like that.

Okay.

Yeah, that's the one. Brother. I don't think there's any. Okay, two. There's two.

But it seemed like he's.

Or maybe he just put on weight. That might be the same guy, though. That might be the same brother.

Well, they used to have. A long time ago, and this is unfortunate, but they had a long time ago.

Kids, this is what cocaine does to you. This is cocaine.

Now we just Google. Now we just. But they used to have. A long time ago, black folks were not allowed in movie theaters a long time ago. Yeah, no, I know. Which is unfortunate, and it's wrong, and we know that, but when they were first allowed in, they had to sit in the front row. And so I think you still have.

You all better not pull up no fucking picture of that.

No, I'm just saying. No. Yeah, keep these guys, because if you ever sat in the front row.

Yeah. You got to look up.

So I think you still have, like, the grandchildren of some of those front row brothers. You know what? I'm saying kind of.

Yeah, I get that, though. That actually makes a lot of sense when you think about it, when you put it like that.

Oh, yeah. Well, because a lot of things we don't realize are hereditary or genetic, because I've sat in the front and for the next two days, I fucking can't. I don't even need my rear view mirrors. I get it all. I do it all. I'm a damn Tesla.

It was something I wanted to ask you on the last podcast that I didn't get a chance to. I wanted to ask you, have you ever lived in a trailer park?

Have ever lived in a trailer park?

Yeah. Because like you said, some stuff is hereditary. I don't know if that wings off.

I lived in a place where other.

People were living in trailer.

Yeah. Like the neighbors. Some of our neighbors are living in trailers.

Yeah.

So we was in an apartment, but some people kept stealing our balcony. Do you have that picture, Nick?

What?

People kept stealing the wood from our balcony.

People were stealing the actual balcony?

Yeah. People were stealing and build shit in their yard. Like, you come home and somebody have a.

What type of balcony would y'all have that's not attached, though?

Just wooden?

How could you get it off without really getting a hammer?

People get that bitch off.

Yeah.

People get that bitch off.

Drusky. Yeah.

You come home and I bet you be missing it, somebody will have a little bit of a fucking fence in their yard suddenly, like, bitch, that's our fucking balcony.

A stool sitting in the yard.

Yeah. And then the biggest issue was if upstairs, you went out on the balcony, it was not there. So that was it. But, yeah, I think they had a lot of front row brothers back in the day, man. Check it out now. The front row brothers, check it out now.

But typically, they put a lot of black people in the back of the busses and stuff, too. So that's like the opposite. I didn't know they did the shit where they had the black people in the front of the. I've never even researched that. All they taught us in school is fucking back of the bus. Rosa parks back of the bus. So it was always, like, that type vibe.

And now the back of the bus is a cool spot to sit. But black people make stuff cool.

You see what I'm saying? We made cool of that in high school because you come to the back of it, you're getting roasted. Yeah, go ahead, Lincoln Lang, man. Nigga, fuck. And you could be wearing anything. We'll find something in the good. In what you're doing. If you're wearing glasses, you know what I'm saying? We're just going to make fun of any situation. It could be anything, bro. You could be a scholar. You could be like a gymnastic. Yeah.

Arithmetic, lawn care.

We're going to make fun of the shit and make it bad. Oh, yeah, that's the joy in it. Because black people are the funniest race in America. At least, I think. I don't know. Yeah, I think naturally not talking about real talent or the amount of people. I think actually the funniest race of all people, like all of us, somehow, some way are going to find funny in anything.

Well, I think also because black people have been through the most shit and when you go through shit, it makes.

You have to adapt.

Especially if you sitting with your friends and you all don't have say. Like, I remember growing up, a lot of times people didn't have air conditioners, so we'd always be outside. So then you're joking with your friends. You're forced, you cutting up. Yeah. You're not enjoying some creature comfort or doing something fancy. And that's really the best shit, I think.

What's creature comfort?

A creature comfort is like if somebody has a spa or like, what is it? Like a fuck, I don't know what it is, man. It's like an otoman or something.

Material comforts that contribute to physical ease and well being, such as good food and accommodations.

Yeah, if somebody has fancy stuff, makes sense, then you're going to enjoy that instead of spending time with your friends, but, yeah, I agree, man. Black people will make the most funny.

Yeah, it's just a natural thing for us.

It's too much. What have you been seeing? Do you see a lot of this stuff, man?

Yeah, that's been crazy.

Have you spoken him since all of this?

No, I actually seen him. I seen him at a game at one point, but we didn't get a chance to really connect. He's one of those guys, you can't really feel his temperature. You don't know what the fuck he got going on in his brain. At first he was mugging me, and then when I finally got around to going and talking to him, he was just like, he's like, what's up, man? I'm like, never know. Wow, that guy's like, yeah, he's a walking bipolar disorder.

Yeah, he's interesting.

Yeah, he's an interesting guy, but he's very talented and he's very funny.

Oh, one of a kind.

Very interesting guy.

He'd be like how you got 30 pairs of swimming trunks but you ain't never been in the water? Joe Rogan, you need to get Williams on here.

Oh, I would love for him to come on. Yeah, he definitely knows about you.

I got a statue of him at home.

Good.

Yeah, I got a Christmas statue. It's like a Christmas Cat Williams that I have in my home. I bought it at Michael's a few years ago.

What even inspired that?

I saw it. They had two left in there and they was on sale. Yeah, I didn't think they should have been.

You bought both of.

I got one. There it is.

What the fuck, bro? You don't even lie about shit. You just be doing it. I don't even think that was Cat Williams.

That was just fucking baby.

But that was a black fucking. What do you call the shit?

Cat Williams. That's what you call it.

That's a black nutcracker.

That's a damn cat William right there.

That's a black nutcracker.

You ain't telling me that ain't a fucking. I'm taking.

It's a black nutcracker.

I'm taking that bitch somehow, some way.

That's fucking racist. That's not Cat Williams.

That ain't racist.

Black Nutcracker, bro.

I'm supporting the culture. How many people got a fucking black cat Williams in the house? Christmas fucking cat Williams.

It's obviously a Nutcracker. It was about Christmas.

Zoom in on his face a little bit, bruh.

Now that you say it, I kind of see it.

I'm just saying, that is, if that ain't him, then they should have said, the man said it was him.

The man at Michael's.

I bought that bitch at Michael's down there in Daphne, Alabama, baby. I got that bitch two left. And shout out whoever got that last one, and I'll sell it for 4000.

Tell him what it is.

That thing's gone.

Cat Williams.

Because I remember I even tagged him on my story and he shared it.

Swear?

Yeah.

Oh, yeah. Okay, well, it's confirmed then. I didn't know that he had a Christmas line going.

Yeah. That's unbelievable. But I would love to see more cat Williams stuff like that.

Yeah, like just selling shit for Christmas.

Well, he's just one of a kind.

Yeah. I feel like he doesn't sell any merch or any. Not that I can remember. He should have did a whole pimp line if you think about it. He should have done a real fucking whole rollout of shit. Yeah, because his whole shit was like him being a pimp for like 20 years of work. For real.

The pimp chronic.

He would have made a shitload of money, but I'm sure he made a shitload of money off of touring, though.

Yeah. He's a unique thing. He's a unique person. He seems like he likes to do things his own way.

Yeah.

Would you think that's a fair assessment of it?

I agree 100%. Because he's not even into going to like. You won't see him at a fucking GQ party or red carpet. I had never seen Kell Williams at a red carpet.

I saw him one time. I saw him on a bicycle go by the front of the comedy store. It was one of those bicycles where the wheels are all lit up.

He wasn't even going in there. He was going past it.

Just driving past on the front with some buddies and just like this. And I was like, is that cat? And everybody at the same time was like, holy shit. That's cat fucking Williams, bro. On a regular Wednesday night.

That's weird.

Standing up on the wheel.

That's fucking weird.

Cat Williams, bitch. Merry Christmas. That's who he. Yeah, I thought it was. You know how you got four McNuggets but you only ordered a number one Joe Rogan? Tell me that. We all know that's a McDouble.

Can you play that? Really? I don't even know what you're talking about right now. Play that clip.

I don't think there is one. Where did you get just everything he lays out?

It's like, you made that up, though.

Yeah.

Okay.

Oh, yeah. It's just everything he lays out. It's got like a pentameter to it. It's like his own rhythm that he makes, man. This episode is sponsored by prize Picks. Do you love firing on sports? Well, prize picks is the best daily fantasy sports app for you. You can fire on all your favorite sports like NBA, UFC, and even college basketball. That's what I'm talking about, baby. It's March Madness. Instead of choosing teams, you choose individual players. That's what I really love about prize picks. Then you're cheering for a certain player in a just. That's the vibe I really prefer. Each player has a set projection and you choose either more or less than that set projection. For example, if you think Marjon Bochamp is going to have more than six rebounds, you would choose that. While if you think Shay Gillis Alexander is going to have less than 23 and a half points, you would choose that. If you're smart with sports, like, I am, and you know what players are going to perform on what nights. Prize picks is the best app for you. Download the app and use code Theo. Prize picks will match your deposit up to $100.

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Shit, who knows, man? Who knows? That's actually a crazy question to just throw at me.

Oh, I thought you was in.

I'm not the be all, know all. I'm rolling punches, man. I don't know what that guy got going on, but yeah, what have you heard that, you know?

I mean, people always would say that he might be a little rambunctious. That's the kind of stuff I would.

Hear rambunctious is actually a great word to describe it. Yeah, that's actually a great assessment of daddy.

Yeah. That he a rambunctious kind of guy. But I think you also hear that about anybody that's got a lot of money, a lot of power and a lot of power. Yes. The second somebody's got a lot of power, they start saying they gay. Oh, that's one of them power gays and money gays.

I don't know anybody that has said that. Somebody has said that's one of those power gays.

That's one of those. Certainly it could just be white culture. You hear a lot of. Somebody gets a lot of money.

No, it's true, though. I just never heard anybody say it's one of those power gays.

Oh, yeah, the money gays and power gays. Because they've done everything. They start just being gay because they can afford it. Because when you're poor, that actually makes.

A lot of sense when you think about it, because you've experienced everything you're saying. They got bored of it.

Yes.

They got bored of all the other shit.

Yeah. Women and anything.

They're like, fuck it. We might as well do some new rich shit.

Yeah.

Okay.

Because if you don't have any money and you're gay, then you can't afford to tell people to be quiet about it. Because the second you hook up with somebody, they're going to run across the street and you start yelling, you know, but if you got money, then you can be like, don't tell them. And then they'll run across the street and they'll be like, I ain't telling you who gay, but might be know. It's different.

You never know, man.

But now they got the means. But here's one thing I do notice. In black culture, they can start ripping on people in podcasts about, like, people will start commenting. Oh, this is why. I know, but in white culture, if we did that, bro, people would be like, you can't say that. He needs to be able to come out the.

That's why I say it's different in different cultures. You really can't assess. Like, yeah, I'm just trying to find the right words to say to not get canceled.

Oh, sorry, man.

Assessment and organization.

Yeah, but, yeah, I think maybe I shouldn't have said anything either then, but they got all those memes now. It's like that song or whatever. You know what I'm talking about?

Like what? Like the new sexy res, though?

No, it's like let that coochie breathe. Oh, that one's insane.

Yeah, let that coochie breathe. Shake that ass, bitch.

Yeah.

Hands on your knees. And the hands on the knees part. That's the real description of what they're doing. Yeah, you get it? Play hands on your knees by sexy red.

Play some sexy red for us.

Yeah, just type in hands on your knees on YouTube. Sexy red.

Yeah, but they got all those meme songs. It's like every step you take, you gay. All that shit. Every move you make, every single day, every time I pray, I'll be missing your gay ass.

You have officially lost me.

I got to show you some of this shit, man. And I don't care if the dude's gay or not. Who gives a shit?

I agree.

That's where I'm at. I don't give a damn if he's gay. Bipolar, whatever he is.

Yeah, you got to go to sexy rap part.

Yeah, that ain't her. They think anybody's sexy red?

Yeah, they thought. They just assumed she was the black lady right here. This is the part I'm putting you on game here. Hands on your knees. Hands. So, yeah, you see how your hands is already on your knees?

Natural.

It's a natural thing. And shake that ass. And me. You get what I'm saying?

Yeah.

It makes you naturally do it. Because it's like. Hands on your knees. It's like Simon says. It's the same shit. You just see just naturally. It's like a natural thing, man.

Simon says, put your right hand on your right knee. Simon says, let that coochie breathe. Breathe. Bro, the school system going to change.

I swear, bro, they need to have that song in the school system. For real. Like the new hooked on phonics.

Bro. They can't be sheep fucking misspelled sexy. They can't fucking be teaching these kids with this shit.

How do you misspell sexy? That is crazy. I never noticed that.

But, no, she's a queen, bro. Yeah. What do you think about this? Sexy red responded to Aiden Ross after he said they had sex together. Do you think that's just.

I think it's bullshit.

I think it's bullshit.

I think it's bullshit. I'm not sure. And if she did, I can't believe it, man. I'm not going to lie, because I felt like she just went along with it. She's a funny person on Twitter.

Yeah.

All her tweets are crazy. If you pull up any of sexy red's tweets. Let's read some of her tweets.

She's hilarious.

All her tweets on Twitter are fucking insane.

Sexy red is a vibe, huh?

Bad bitch, too.

I know, dude. I have a big crush on her.

Yeah. I know you're not really into black girls, but that's one that you should take down for sure. If there's any black girl, it'd probably be like, sexy rat.

Oh, baby, I've been working hard.

Stank right now.

My kuchi stank, period.

Yeah.

And then retweeted herself, this motherfucker stank right now. Thank the Lord.

Thank the Lord. That's like, you. That's why I said she'd be perfect. You praise God.

Oh, yeah. I love it.

Yeah.

Oh, man. I wanted to take her to a UFC fight, but she got pregnant.

I don't fuck with UFC, though.

You think she got pregnant just to get out of the. No.

Yeah. What do you mean? To go on in the UFC fight with you or.

Yeah, to like. No.

Did you ask her, or you're saying.

Yeah, I said I would like to take her, and she said she would go. And then she's like, I'm pregnant. But she really.

I don't think she would get pregnant to get out of a date that's nine months of.

Unless she really didn't want to go on it, bro.

Yeah, but still, that's pretty absurd, man.

That's heartbreaking.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah. She's cute.

Yeah. That's why I say I feel like that would be your type if you dated black girls.

I'm willing to date a nice black girl.

Yeah.

A black girl. That's nice.

Okay. What is your description of nice?

Oh, yeah, it could be anybody, I think. Somebody that. I don't think they smoke cigarettes, so. That's not it.

It's more of, like, vape shit now. I don't think.

Yeah, maybe. I think it might be okay if she vapes as long as she's not vaping at night or whatever, but, yeah, I think so. I saw a girl at the airport the other day that was really bad. Damn. I wanted to fucking ride through that little machine for her.

TSA.

God damn, boy. I'll lay on my back and ride through that bitch for her. I'll swim upstream in that bitch.

With the bag.

I'll be rolling over every Sampson night in that bitch to get back to my girl, bro.

What does she look like? Like, describe.

Just tall. Kind of had some booty on her, bro.

Yeah, I knew that.

And some of the titty went into the booty. I was like, damn, this is a whole.

I'm trying to imagine that it was.

Just.

Like, coke bottle shape.

I mean, she looked like the letter s, bro.

Yeah.

And she was really pretty eyes, nice, soft spoken, looked at me twice. One time I hung around for a long time for the second look, but.

Still count weird at that point.

It still counts, but, yeah, it was a little weird. And I waved and I walked out, bro, and the wave was what fucking fucked me up.

What type of fucking guy waves. See, that's going to turn black women off. I know you don't do that shit. You got to be a little bit gangster. You got to be straight up. They want straightforward, especially coming from you. You know what I'm saying? One of our white brothers in the community. I think more black women want you to be. You got to be more assertive. Not too much, because you know how you all get. But you all got to meet.

None of that turn back the clock. I'm a modern day soldier, brother.

You get what I'm saying?

Yeah, 100%, buddy.

None of that going back to the 18 hundreds bullshit. I'm saying be assertive.

2012 and up, bro.

Yeah, 2012 and up. Assertive, right. Just being straight up for it.

I think you look lovely. I would like to see you.

Not lovely. See, lovely is too much.

Okay?

Like, damn, you fine as hell.

Damn, girl, you look fine as hell with all this luggage.

Nah, see, luggage, see, they don't want you to see. At that point, they feel like you just want to fuck. Oh, damn, you fine as hell. I like the way you look. You are beautiful. Beautiful. But if you say it, maybe if you say it twice, it'll make it feel like they want to fuck, too. So just say it once, okay?

You're fine as hell. You are beautiful, and I would like to see you soon.

That works. But you got to give them a little. They want to feel that. Umph. Yeah. I'm a colonel of this motherfucker. You get what I'm saying? Yeah. No, you don't play it. You just bring that energy, you know what I'm saying? They want to wipe.

Had the strangest feeling. Put some shit like that on.

They some.

Tevin, can we talk?

See, they like that, though, because, see, if you got rhythm. You know what I'm saying? I love to know your name.

That's going to be. I'm going to leave that in my bag. Play it.

That works.

And then it's going by.

Well, one of those book bag speakers.

Yeah. I put it in my bag at the TSA last night.

What you know about that, man? Okay. Okay.

Hell, yeah.

We got to exchange cultures, man. I like a lot of do. Yeah. Yeah. Morgan Wallen. Big on him right now.

Yeah. He's great with Lil Dirk. They made a couple songs. They made a new him. And Drake made a video, too.

I was hoping they would make music, though, together. I know they probably did. It's just not released.

They might have. I haven't heard anything about it.

Luke Combs, too.

Luke is great.

Luke is insane.

Beyonce's got a new country out.

That's really why I wore this shirt. It was influenced by.

Really? Yeah. Yeah. He does wear Holmes always wear.

Yeah, I just thought I'd throw it on.

Luke is a classy dude, bro. He's one of a kind, man. Drew, you got a new show, man. Look, I've watched both episodes. Yes. And it could have been house. It's a wild, bro.

Yeah, wild, man. We got some characters on it.

Yeah.

They're one of them.

Oh, there you go. Right there, baby.

That's a little rich.

He looks like Sidney Poitier. A little. That's little rich. And he a little baby.

He's just an infant. He's just an infant, bro.

He looked like he about 195.

All solid at the top, though. It's just top. When you pick him up, it's all in one place. You know what I'm saying? All the weights in one area, bro.

He'll change his own diaper, too, bro. He. That kind of.

He's swole, too.

He looked like five cents.

Oh, man.

He ready to get it done, bro.

And he's bowleg, too, so he's quick. Yeah, he's quick.

Oh, yeah. He got that fucking in and out, bro. He'll run a fucking curl rat on anybody. Well, I saw him kind of hump in the furniture. He got that shit zoo in him. He'll impregnate otoman.

Yeah, he got into a fight, too. I gave him a whooping the first night. We didn't show that, but I gave.

Oh, really?

Spanking. Yeah, he had to get a spanking and then. Yeah, he just needed some discipline. He's just an infant, though, so that's why I'm not even really.

Yeah, he's still growing.

Yeah.

Damn. What grade is he in?

He's premature. Yeah, he was premature, man. He's a little ahead of his time, so I think he might be second grade now.

Oh, damn.

Yeah, but that's why he's getting the facial hair.

Yeah, it comes in hot. Ugliest rapper you all couldn't think of a better name for we didn't come up with it.

He wanted to be called ugliest rapper alive. I didn't come up with his name. He came on the show and I was like, what's your name? He said, they call me ugly, but you could call me ugly. Rapper alive.

Oh, wow.

I said, okay, see?

Wow, bro.

Yeah, man.

He got that Leveon bell in his mouth. That thing's holding out for a contract.

Yeah, we think about getting them veneers.

Oh, are you really?

Yeah, we think about it, dude, look.

I'll go half on them if you get them.

Deal.

It's important, man. Somebody having a smile. Yeah, if he wants it.

If he wants it, that's if he wants it. Because he told me he naturally enjoys everything about his life right now. He's having a great time. He's loving the fan love.

It seemed like he took a sip off the hose and just never stopped. I'm talking about. He caught a dose of water that just blew him away. Still going down his throat, bro.

You think he swallowed the teeth, is what you say?

I don't know what happened to him. I bet he got them teeth in his pocket. He don't seem like a dude that lets shit go real easy, but he one of a kind. He one of a kind, dude.

Pull up another character. Yeah, this is my asian artist right here. Tms.

Tms. And what the fuck? He showed up with a fucking too much swag. Oh, too much swag.

Too much swag.

And he brought his own door dash, right? That's a.

He's from Queens, New York, bro. From Queens, New York. He's really, like, all jokes aside, he really was in the streets, though.

Really?

Yeah, he was embedded.

Wow. He probably got 30 wings. All flats in there. Yeah. Some of the characters, it's fascinating to watch them. There's my boy right there, bro.

He's from the trailer parts.

He's out of New Orleans right there, bro. He was on the episode when I did the call into your show, remember?

Really?

Yeah. Stars erects, baby. Member when I called into your show on the could have been live.

Oh, yeah, he's the one. He'd be saying the N word all the time.

Gang, bro.

Not gang.

Oh, yeah. That's horrible.

No, that's horrible, man.

That's horrible, bro.

You all from the same area? I like brothers, man.

Yeah. Starzy Rex, man. He one of a kind, dude. He looked definitely. He seemed like his platelets might be a little low. He looked like a palm reader. At a Popeyes chicken.

I think he believes he's black, though, which is why he speaks how he speaks.

Oh, yeah.

He says it all the time. We don't encourage him to. But you can't stop somebody that believes they're black.

Oh. And I don't think he should.

Well, I think we should really.

Some people. But if that's all they ever known, though, because sometimes God puts you in the wrong suit, you're right.

And you could be in the wrong predicament in the right body. Yeah, I get it.

I think sometime, not all the time. I'm not saying that everybody, not everybody can be a culture vulture. I'm not saying I don't think that people should starze. He looked like he's in Houston buyers club, dog. He looked like he fucking. He been through some wild.

He been through some shit.

Yeah, but he'd been through some shit because I think that's the biggest connector piece sometimes, is how does somebody.

Well, it's still not an exception to say the word, right?

Oh, no, that's true.

Yeah.

I'm not saying that. I mean, an exception to good guy, though. Right. That's a connector piece. I think sometimes between cultures is if somebody's been through something. Yeah.

But he does believe he's black, which is like, it's cool.

But he may be, like, albino or just color. He may be. What's that called when you can't see what color you are? Or whatever color.

Blonde.

Colorblind.

Yeah. Or either that or he's albino. I don't know.

He could be albino, dude, every now and then they got them. Yeah.

They could say the n word. Clearly they can say the word. You know what I'm saying? It might not look like they're albino. You should start telling people. Whenever you slip up, just start telling people, hey, dude, I'm Albino, man.

Bro.

Look at him. That's what I'm saying. He's the same skin complexion as you. He's the same skin complexion as you, man. You could go for albino. You just got to go blonde, bro.

That's Macklemore, dog. What y'all even talking about, man?

Can they say it? Can they say it?

Look, bro, that dude, I think could say whatever fuck he wants. That is. Damn. And who is this other guy?

Yeah, as one of the big ones.

Oh, wow. That's Marvin Jones, bro. Yeah.

Now here, he's black, though. These are black men.

And he's undercover, though. He's a narc. I mean, I don't want to say a narc or whatever, but that was kind of popping back then, though. Yeah, I think there was an albino time.

I do agree.

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Wait, what?

In the day?

I think that's too close to the word to say it.

Okay. They used to have more hymns in the day.

Bring up albinos. I've never seen, like, an albino funeral or like an albino wedding or nothing. I feel like when you really think about it, I have never fully seen anything like a celebration of an albino. I've never seen a birthday or nothing.

Yeah.

Truthfully speaking, I've never seen it.

Yeah, me neither. And that should be a bigger thing because it's so rare. It's almost like, remember when the white tiger comes to the zoo or whatever and everybody's excited and they send out.

All the paint, same shit.

Yeah. It should be like Richie's fucking eleven.

I agree.

Wow.

Yeah.

Because you really are one of God's most majestic. Yeah.

Not too many of them.

An albino is something you would probably see in Australia then. Yeah. Because they have a lot of very rare animals over there.

But albino is classified as black, right.

That's a good question. Can we look that up?

I want to make sure.

Because a person or animal having a congenital absence of pigment in the skin and hair.

Hair which are white, and the eyes which are usually pink. Okay.

Anybody can be albino.

Anybody can be albino. So they probably can't say the word.

They should be able to apply online as black or to at least say the word. Imagine you're in albino. You've been through the trenches. You can't even fucking.

You can't say it. Yeah, no, I get it. Damn.

Yeah. But they used to have more, like, white guys that wanted to be black. I feel like.

Yeah.

Like when I was a growing up.

Around, like, the 2004, 2006.

Oh, yeah. I think look that up and we don't have to say the word, but look it up. Early blanks. Oh, here we go. You got Beastie boys. Yeah.

Beastie boys was definitely that rapaport. Yeah.

Oh. 101 Dalmatians.

Definitely the professor from am one.

Well, 101 Dalmatians. Bitches are fucking mixed, bro.

That's what they mean by albino. Yeah.

Michael Jackson.

Yeah.

Who else? Alex Trebek.

Yeah. I don't know who that is.

That's fair. Because sometimes he starts everything with, like, what is.

There were wiggers.

Huh?

Civil war wiggers.

I don't know who else? Oh, yeah, there you go. Abraham Lincoln for show.

Yeah.

Oh, Lester Holt. Deaf.

I didn't know he.

He's kind of a blancie. Kind of.

Yeah. He just might be tan.

And Lilo from Lilo. And Stitch. Definitely.

She was definitely hawaiian. That was hawaiian.

Who knows?

It's just facts on Google, right? I don't know.

Well, look, Google does what it does, man. But Alex Trevek for sure, man, because he'd always be like, who know where is on jeopardy.

You're saying?

Yeah, he would always kind of start shit was like, you didn't really know what he was talking about, man.

I guess I never watched Jeopardy, so I don't know too much.

Jeopardy is fire, dude. If you're with a lady.

Yeah.

Sit down, boy. Watch Jeopardy. And you get a couple right. You watch it earlier in the day, too. And then you invite a girl over. Let's watch it.

He's smart as hell.

Get three right, boy. Get three right. Grill her up a little pork chop or something. Little cup of candy.

Pull back up. Do y'all have another person from our show, Alex Trebek?

They thought he was black early on.

Shit. It's getting worse, man. This is getting worse. The dig of this.

We bring in cultures together. Alex Trevek, baby.

That might just be white makeup, though.

Yeah, that's true, too. Who knows what they did to him?

Yeah.

But Lester Holt, definitely. Oh, there you go, right there.

That's as our gay Crip rapper.

Oh, wow.

Yeah.

And Crip Mac was on there.

Yeah, Crip Mac was on Crip Mac. And the gay Crip rapper actually fought because in Crips, Crip Mac is an infant loke general. So I don't know how that know. They got, like, the infant, then they got what you call, like. It's like Papa Bear A. It's like an older loak than infant loke general.

Okay.

But they fought because of crip reasons. I don't know.

Damn.

Yeah. I don't get too deeply involved in.

The crip culture, but, yeah, they cripped up.

Yeah.

Wow. But he went to jail. Did you guys film this before?

Yeah, we filmed this right before he went to jail.

Oh, man.

Yeah, he went to jail. Right.

And we got a free crip, man.

Yeah.

There's no way he did it. What's he up for?

That's a good question. I have no clue. I think it was felony gun charges. Felony gun charges? Yeah. You don't think he's saying there's no way he did that?

I think it's 50 50. Yeah, maybe 60 40. Yeah, he probably did it.

Yeah, he definitely did it.

Good luck. Hey, we love you.

That's my boy, man. We hope to free that guy, though. Somebody got it with the budget that we got for him.

Amen. And what about the show? How does it evolve? What can we look forward to seeing on the show, man?

Oh, man. It evolves because I saw them battle.

Rapping on the tennis court. I saw him getting that. They got his emergency bracelet off.

We brought real talent in to help these guys out, too.

Really?

Chris Brown, Snoop Dogg, we had a vocal coach that came in and helped them.

Really?

Yeah, man. All this stuff, this is about musical and keep it about music, and majority of it is about signing them to deals they can't get out of. So it's like a snooze, you lose situation, and you learn from your mistakes. So it's almost teaching them through hard learning. They're signed up for the rest of their life and not receiving anything from it. So it's kind of like they're going to eventually learn that that was a bad situation, but it's good teaching. Good teaching comes from like, that's how, you know, it's like, hollywood, man.

That's how it. Welcome to fucking. Welcome to fuck. Let me give you a better one. Welcome to big business, baby. Good, man.

Yeah, man.

Yeah. You got to learn the dirty ins and outs of Hollywood, baby. You got to make enough money to be gay, baby, if you.

Actually didn't. Just to clear that up. We did not do anything to them.

No, I'm not saying y'all did anything with them, but I'm saying because, look, I could see what they're saying, because I could see how some people get enough money where they're thinking, I could be gay if I want.

No, actually, he's just the gay crip rapper. We didn't do anything gay. There's nothing gay.

There's nothing gay on the show.

Yeah, there's nothing gay. Nothing against him. We didn't indulge in anything gay on the show.

Did being gay help him in any instances?

I do think being gay helped his career, for sure, because it helped him be seen and be heard more.

It's a good point.

Yeah. It helped him be seen and heard more because there's a lot of crip rappers. There's not too many openly gay crip rappers, right?

Yeah.

I had to pick him up, man. He was hard to find.

Was he?

Yeah. We went through a whole bunch of shit trying to reach out the crips.

Hide a lot of the. Probably. I wonder if they.

Yeah, I don't know. You wonder if they what?

Hide the gay community or they push it out forward?

That's a good question.

I think gangs are evolving more. I did read something about eight months ago that gangs are evolving more to invite more lgbtq friendly patrons.

I actually don't think you read that at all.

Really?

I don't think that it was that out there.

You might be right.

Did you read that?

I did read that. I think.

You think?

I'm not sure, but I think I could have look it up. But I say this bro diddy might be gay, bro. That's the craziest thing.

Why do you keep revisiting?

Because everybody keeps talking about it. Yeah, it's a gay witch hunt right now going on. How are you going to say you never seen a wiener but, you know, the shape of a man's balls? Joe Rogan. That's what I'm talking about, bro. Cat is the oracle. They need to rub on Cat's back and get three more prophesys out of him, bro, because he got the man.

You need to bring cat on here, for real. I'd love to.

I would love to.

I think y'all might get into a battle rap on here.

Yeah, it could be interesting. How does the show. Can you give us any pointers about the show? Like, what does it look like down the line?

I can't give them too much because I kind of want everybody to continue to tune in and not really know what to expect, if you feel what I'm saying. It's honestly, every episode, you couldn't guess what's going to happen next. And I think that's what is keeping the viewers so entertained because they don't know what the fuck is to come of none of that shit at any moment. I didn't know that Crip Mac was going to go on there trying to check everybody, right? But when he came, he's like, yeah, Infino, General I'm here to crush it.

I'm here to figure shit out.

And I'm thinking, I said, yeah, talk to the kids, man. Talk to him. He was trying to give them the beats and beat the shit out of them. So neither here nor there. But we handled it, though. We didn't let it get too out of hand.

Yeah, you all were on top of it a lot, it seemed like.

Make us security everywhere. Yeah, everywhere.

Well, I noticed even what's his name snitched before the fight.

Oh, yeah. Ugliest rapper alive.

Yeah, you got to respect that, man. I respect a guy who snitches but also will still go fight.

Yeah, but snitch first. And he told me, he said, I went and got them beforehand, before it went down, so they could stop it, which is smart when you think about it. It's a smart thing to do. We had to blur it. We had to blur it, bro.

This is like Mike Tyson's punch out. What the fuck y'all playing over there?

It was like an 80s visual right there.

Every other scene in this bitch, I got a blur, bro. And when the two ladies went after.

Yeah, they was beating, bro.

And this lady right here, Cruella Deville out there, because she's trying to breastfeed that little guy, that little McNugget over there. What's his name? Lil Rich. Little rich? Yeah. Little milk dud carter. She over there trying to breastfeed him.

Look at him. Look at him, man.

Oh, no. Look, dude, it's some real shit now. She came in with some bars. I liked her.

Was. She's very talented. She actually was really good. This is my boy right here. He was the mole on the show. That's actually one of my real homies from back at home.

Is it really?

Yeah, he's a brother. He's from Gwinnett county.

Oh, gang, baby. Good to see.

He's one of the homies, but we brought him on the show to do.

Is that Martin Lawrence right there?

No, that's one of the studs.

No, right here.

Oh, no, that's Nav Green. Oh, yeah, he's a comedian. He's a big comedian out in Atlanta.

Oh, nice, man.

Yeah, he's with 85 south show.

He is? Yeah. Oh, Navv. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Now, these two people was going at it, bro.

Yeah, she could fight.

Really?

Yeah, that's why we gave it. See what?

He got a little gram on him.

Yeah. And then this is the other one.

And were they allowed to use drugs on premises?

That's a good question. I think it might have got through our TSA system. They weren't supposed to. We did a shakedown. If you watch the first episode, we did shake down where nobody was supposed to, but I do think some paraphernalia got snuck in.

Yeah, I did see you guys.

We didn't encourage it at all. We didn't want nothing to happen. But I think your boy from Louisiana.

Oh, Starzee's right.

Starzy. Rack the white boy. Yeah, that said the n word. He found some people, and he shouldn't have done it.

Don't do it, man. I know you want to do it, but, yeah, I've said it before. Write it down. Put it in a bottle. A lot of people will do that.

I notice they put it in a bottle.

Write it down, put it in, like, a bottle, throw it out in the water.

What does that do for you, though?

It's just, like, message in a bottle. It just gets it out of your system.

Yeah, just get the n word out. But you want it to get out to the world, but without it being known or seen.

Just let the Lord do what he wants with it. Then. If you throw it out under the water, that's on you. Look at that. Imagine you roll up on one of them on the beach.

Let the Lord do as he pleases with it, right?

Yeah.

If it gets to one of the sharks or a whale up there.

But imagine it gets to China, and some dude opens it up, and he starts.

You'Re going to hell, man. You're going to bring my fucking artist up now. Matter of fact, you should bring the list of contestants in here and do just quick interview, even if it's like, fucking quick five minute. Just questionnaires. Just have.

With each one?

Yeah, with each one. It'd be like a five minute thing. We just bring them all in and just do chop, chop, chop, chop, chop, chop. And just bring them all in.

Longtime swag. I would do it, dude. I would do it. Yeah, I could do that next week.

No, too much swag.

Too much swag.

Yeah, just bring them all in and just ask them how they feel about, like, five minutes.

What's going on?

Yeah, why not? I think they deserve to have a voice, right?

Oh, 100%. I agree.

Even if they didn't win the competition.

Yeah. I want to know what's going on. I would love to do it, man. We could even do that next week. Yeah. What else do we want to talk about? Oh, I did see an article, Pornhub got canceled. Where was it?

Yeah, I tried to go on there yesterday.

You did?

I tried to go on there yesterday, yesterday night. And, yeah, I couldn't, man. And I'm like, were you kind of happy you couldn't? In a way, because I had to use imagination at that point. Yeah. And it's like going back to when you were in middle school, you know what I'm saying? Takes you back. It took me back. It took me back. But Pornhub is down, man. Yeah. Suspend site in Texas due to state age verification law.

Legal experts say a fifth circuit decision to uphold part of a Texas law regulating adult entertainment websites conflicts with us Supreme Court precedent regarding minors.

Do you ever use imagination?

Yeah, I use it a lot more these days, and I'm glad. I think that they should do more of this, bro, because you shouldn't be able to sit in a class if you 13 or ten and watch it. I just don't think it's good, bro. I think you should be able to use imagination. Use imagination or bike across town and have to get a little magazine from your boy or whatever. We used to have to go get on the edge of the roof and move that direct TV thing and try to get a signal to the porn channel. Yeah. Catching some titties off of Mars or something. We was catching some shit. You had the fuck what? Romania, bro. If you station that thing right, so.

What would I do? Remember the magazines? My mom used to get these. That was my first time whacking off, was the jet magazines. It was like the ebony for black woman likes to get jet. But in the middle of the magazine, there's like a swimsuit piction. No, there's no men.

Okay.

No, it was like all, like, black ebony. Oh, yeah, black ebony. Like busty models, I'm sure, you know. What's your porn search?

My porn search is like, go to of all time.

Like, majority of the time, you know, you just know I'll look abusively.

Something just like, enjoyable. See something like that or something general, I'll do.

That's so general. Yeah, that's just like, anything could be enjoyable. Pussy.

Yeah. Right.

But I think it gives you an option. It could be any race, any.

Right, so then I'm not stuck into one k. But I think, yeah, if you can't have that. Because then I think what happens is now you might start thinking instead of just jerking off, you're going to look at the. Your brain will start being like, oh, I'm attracted to a girl. Because a lot of times you might be attractive, you just jerk off, and then next thing you forget to talk to her. And now you don't have a valentine.

Yeah. The move back in the day was just using the yearbook, too. Oh, yeah, those the yearbook days. Oh, man.

Oh, bro. It'd be like one little picture. It looked like somebody had some breasts. It could be a flare in the photo, you'd be like, God damn, Tiffany got them. Tiffany got them fudge rounds.

But see, there was no options back in the day, so it was like, man, you had to.

But, yeah, to be sitting in class, you can look at. I think it's so.

I like it. So that's why they took it away.

Yeah, well, I think they don't want people having it. Children to be able to access under 18.

Yeah, because, you know, they just put the button where you'd be like, are you over 18? You just click that shit every time.

Oh, that's all you got to do.

Yeah, you just click.

I think you'd have to send an ID in or something.

No, you just click. Okay. Yes, I'm over 18.

Porno, one of the most visited websites in the world, sued Attorney general Paxton last year to block enforcement of a 2023 state law that requires websites that host pornography to institute age verification measures and display health warnings on its pages. I can't believe people would fight against this. What sick motherfucker is saying? You know what? This eleven year old needs to be able to look at this crazy, bro. We got to get back to having some. I think it's better for people, bro.

Yeah.

And it's better if you a father, you know? Your know, I think it's like you can only do so much as a. So, you got any children on the way, Britt?

No, man. I hope not. Shit.

Any love?

I wrap it up, man. Yeah, there's always potentials, man. There's always the one you feel like you find, but then it feels like it's always something that directs you the other direction or you're like, fuck, man. I wish you wouldn't have done that. It's just that one thing. And it fucks me up, man. Because it's hard to find love when you're out here. Black and successful and rich and popular, famous.

Really? It's tough.

Yeah, it's tough for a brother, man.

Damn.

It might be easy for you all. Yeah. No, I'm saying tough for love.

Not tough for love.

Anybody could get some pussy. Yeah, it's just love, man. It's a hard one to find. There's one right now that I was like, all right. Yeah, there's one.

Can we talk for a minute?

Yeah. I want to know your name.

Yeah, let's go.

You feel me? Yeah. I actually brought rotide Willie here.

You brought roll tide Willie?

I brought Roll Tide Willie here from the. And we also, we.

Dad was in the military with him.

Swear.

Yeah, my budy's dad was in the military with him.

With roll tide Willie.

Yeah, roll tide. That beer is good. No jokes aside, my friend's dad was in the military with him.

How the fuck do you know this? He lives in Alabama.

Yeah, my friend's dad is from Alabama.

Oh, shit.

And they were in the military together. That's fucking crazy. Yeah.

I want to bring him in.

Let's bring him in, man.

Yeah.

Rt dub at the gang, bro.

Roll tide.

We rolling.

Yeah, man. Brought the legend, man. You know.

There he is.

Willie win. How was that flight, bro?

That flight was all right, but it was a long one. I didn't think I was going to ever get here. Yeah, man. Man said be about 30 minutes. It seemed like we rode for another hour and a half.

Have you flown before, Willie?

I flew in a little small jet before. Not no big one.

What the hell are you doing on a small jet?

I worked with a man and he had a little small jet.

Now, you were in the military, Willie? I think you were in the military with my friend's dad. Yeah.

He said you went to the military with his dad at one point.

Were you in the military?

I got to translate to him. It's a certain. He don't really.

Yeah, I believe he was in the military with my friend's dad.

So he's saying, you know how you were down there? Roll tide.

Yeah.

And out in Tuscaloosa, right. You were bamber boy. And in the past, you went and you did stuff in the army, right? Yeah. He got a buddy that did stuff in the army with you. Right?

What branch was he in?

What branch of the army?

He was in the.

Oh, you remember him?

Yeah. 34 Division.

34Th Division.

Yeah.

You guys were in the 34th Air Force?

Yeah.

You know the guy he's talking about? Just be real. Do you know this guy he's talking about?

Yeah, I know some of them. I think I know him.

But you were in the military.

Do you know how many people are in the military, though? That's kind of.

There's a lot of people was in the military.

You remember his budy's dad?

Yeah.

Fuck it. All right.

Yeah, I'm trying to think if we can bring him up.

Pull up. It's the guy right here.

Yes.

You remember him?

Yes, I remember seeing him.

Yes. Okay.

We hung out a little bit.

What did you all do in the army?

Done whatever the hell they told us to do.

Yeah, that's what you posted? So, that's him right there. Oh, he got ripped since he got outside?

Yeah.

No, that's current.

Oh, it is.

They're the same age.

Yeah.

Wow.

That joker is a horse.

Yeah.

That's unbelievable, man. And what were you guys in the army?

Yeah, I told you.

Like, the 34 platoon.

Wow. And are you Sagittarius? What are you.

Sadist? But the side.

You got to care about Zodiac about?

Nothing but the tide.

I said I could tell Willie somebody died just now, and he don't give.

A piss about nothing but the tide, bro.

It's a zodiac. Bro, we wouldn't even be here if it weren't for it.

Okay, look, they brought you what you need.

But the tide is the greatest football team there is in the world.

I agree with you. I agree with you. Now, I'm going to name off a couple of other teams. You tell me if they're good or not, all right?

All right.

Oregon ducks sucks. Okay. TcU horn frogs, they suck.

Uga Bulldogs, they suck, too.

Bulldogs is good.

Yeah.

Okay, what about this?

The Toronto Maple Leafs shit, I ain't never heard of.

They suck. They suck, too. And then one more. Let me think. Oh, I know about this. What about the two lane green wave?

Oh, they so.

Oh, damn.

And the buzzers.

So.

Enough.

Suck.

That's what we call the Auburn Buzzards.

Oh, the Auburn. The buzzards.

Yeah, the Tigers.

Now, what about them Ole Miss Rebels? Willie.

Ole Miss Rebel. I ain't got no use for them, neither, praise God.

And them South Carolina Cox. What about.

Ain't I got no use for them, neither. All right, my second favorite team after the tight is the Georgia Bulldogs.

I'm going to have one of those with you. Can you grab me one?

Yeah, have one.

Man, I would never have one in two years.

Hey, I ain't drinking, Willie. Man, go ahead and get that. I ain't took that drink.

No, I think I'll get a new one, Willie. I'll get a new one.

And do you remember, I don't blame you on that, because you'll never know what happened.

Willie, I want to find out a little bit about when you were a child. Did you ever have Halloween? Did you guys dress up for Halloween?

Yeah, we wore Halloween masks and stuff like that. Sometime we put a brown paper bag over our head and paint it up. Cut eyes and all that in.

Why did you guys do that, though? What is the reason?

Because we were so Poland couldn't fold. Nothing else.

Yeah. And would y'all go trick or treating or what?

Trick or treating. And, you know, get us a little candy and all.

Yep.

Were black people trick or treating around that time?

Yeah, it was when I lived down there in Charlote. We had a lot of black friends.

Oh, yeah.

Best friends. Best friends I had.

Yeah. Why?

Because they was always there for me and I was there for them.

I said, a brother always, never going to expire. Hey, I used to get black don't crack.

I used to get in the fight and go, here, be wanting to fight. He was black. But he'll come over there, he'll tell the other black boy, you ain't messing with him now.

Yeah.

He said, if you go to him, I'm going to WHOOP you.

Yeah. You see the way they talk? They say the black boy, that black boy, that's from back in the day.

Yes. Old.

That's what he knows, though.

Yeah.

What's the blackest somebody can be? What's the blackest somebody can be? Drew Ski, in my terms. Is there the blackest guy? Do you guys know my homies?

Yeah.

What the fuck is that?

That's probably the blackest guy he knows right there. He's got dreads. Anybody with dreads around?

Right. See that? That is my man right there.

Who is that?

That is Hollywood Ryan Williams.

Amen.

Yeah, we call him Hollywood.

Yeah, gang, he's a nice guy.

Oh, man. He number one ride receiver for Alabama. About nut but the size.

Blitz, bama. Blitz, baby. And now, what about your first girlfriend ever, Willie? Who was it?

I don't think Willie. Memory.

I don't remember no first girlfriend.

Yeah. What about the most recent one? Currently. Like, what was your last wife? Girlfriend?

That you. I ain't had no wife. I ain't had a girlfriend in 20 years.

But wouldn't you want some love? I'd like to be married.

Oh, yeah. I love to have some love, but ain't none around where I live.

What is the women like around there?

They all either mad.

Yeah. They don't like no drugs.

I don't like no drugs.

I don't do drugs. You ever been off.

Fentanyl?

Fentanyl? I ain't never fooled with no drugs. This is my only drug.

Miller light. Amen. And I think, are you not a Sagittarius? It doesn't matter.

You said, well, I was born in December, so I reckon I'm a Sagittarius, I reckon.

Yeah, you are. Damn, brother, they got a lot of Sagittarius.

Dude, I thought I surprised you for your birthday. I thought it was his birthday. I didn't know.

Bro. He think we all got the same birthday.

I assumed it was. Know he's that country.

Now. Willie, what would it take to get you to cheer for another team? That is a question I would like to know, man.

What amount of money would it take?

Couldn't take no money. I'm a diehard.

What amount of pussy would it.

No pussy. Nothing. I'm a dieharded tide fan.

Now, what if a woman came and I'm talking a lady came over from Texas a m. I'm talking a lady rides up in a Corvette. Willie, what the tits look like with some of that fucking. She got some titties. Look like two angry dogs trying to chew on your cock.

Tell me this.

She got that couter on her.

Yeah, but I seen some of them at the airport.

Yeah, baby. And what do you now?

Oh, man. Did some of them have one guacamade? Praise God, baby had one down at.

A choke of mew. That's what I'm talking about.

Now, would I have took some of that? Not no, but hell yeah.

He folded. Don't take too much to get you to switch. It had nothing to do with. It's the blonde Texas.

Get you a little sip of that beer. How's that beer, Willie?

That beer is good, but see, but ain't nothing going to make me lead the tide.

Really? Nothing?

Nothing. I respect that, man. He's a man with good Lucy, I'll.

Tell you, I'm a true tide man.

Yeah.

Now, how do you feel about. And how do you feel about coach Saban leaving?

Oh, man, I cried when he.

Yeah, yeah. My step cousin cried.

I cried. And I still even choke up by even time I think about it.

Have you talked to him since he quit?

No, I ain't talked to him. I'm hoping to get to meet him and get to talk to him.

You're going to convince him to go back?

Hell, yeah. I need my coach.

Amen.

But I think we're in good hands with the other coach.

Yeah.

You got to say that, though.

Yeah, well, I got to support him. He's our coach.

Of course.

And I'm going to support him 100%. And we got to get a man. He's been a winner everywhere he's been, and we got roll tide. Roll tide. We don't give up.

Hey, look, if you don't respect Nick. Say, everybody respects Nick Saban. Everybody respects the program. You have to respect it. That's the thing. There's not a part of me that ever has been unrespectful of the program, man. But let me think about this. Would you ever go back into the military if there were a war?

No, I'm too old.

You're never too old.

If they'll let me go, you probably.

Could be a cook in the army.

Now. I don't want to be no cook. I want to go out there with action.

Hell, yeah, baby. I want you on the front line, baby.

Would you trust Willie on the front?

Dude, I'd hire Willie before I get a damn ring camera. Dude, are you kidding?

Fuck.

God damn.

I might need to switch seats, man.

You're going to be fine, baby. Just pulling up.

That's that Jesus spirit right there jumping out of, man.

Now, Willie, what religion were you guys raised? Brother?

We was Christian.

Yep.

Okay. Nah, that's what's up. You know, I'm catholic.

Ain't nothing wrong with that.

Catholic. I grew up catholic people.

Yeah.

That's a part of Christianity.

Right. As long as you believe in the right thing, that's all it counts.

What'd you grow up?

Me? Yeah, we was 7th Baptist.

7Th Baptist, okay. What is the difference? I thought it was just baptist.

No, there's different layers of it, I think.

Well, you got different layers. You got what they call them.

Samoans, Somalians.

Yeah.

No, I think that's a race.

Muslims?

Yeah, Muslims.

Slims, we call them.

He got some new teeth, too.

You got rid of that nickel defense you was carrying? Yeah.

Look at him right there. He actually didn't have anything.

Right there.

Yeah, it was straight gums there.

Straight gums there. And you feel different now, or how do you feel?

Oh, I feel great.

Yeah.

I gnaw through a cement brick.

Now eat them.

Say, I want to eat.

Let's go, baby.

Even some.

Hell.

Willie giving a fade to some. Everything possible. Wow. The world is your oyster, Willie. What do you think the future is for the tide this year with the new coach? What do you predict?

I think we're going to be in the playoffs.

Amen.

Yeah, I know we're going to lose some games, but we will make it in the playoffs and probably going to have a shot at the title.

Very fair.

It got me again. Yeah, baby. That's holy water.

That's free, baby.

It keep coming. It's another bless.

I ain't going to put my tide down. We going to be there.

Yeah. Well, look you all been there every time?

Man, I'll be blind before I get out of here.

You all been there every time, Willie? Wow.

Yeah, I'm good, man.

Yeah, he's doing good. And what about children, Willie? Any children in the future for you?

If I can find a woman, it's crazy.

You give me one woman I find over there, Dallas, Texas, on that airplane.

That Texas a. M. I'll take one of them. Pull up another one of the. What school would you say out there? You said Texas A. M. Girls.

No, these girls was on the airplane from.

Yeah, I got some beautiful women from there.

Yeah, Texas.

We got to find you a good woman out there, Willie.

Oh, you need to find me. Oh, look at that. Would I take this?

But you don't like LSU, though.

I don't like LSU, but I like the girl.

Yeah. My God, she pulled for LSU.

When I'm going, what?

I'll say, pull up some sisters. Pull up some sisters for some black sisters type in ebony hot chicks.

There we go.

Oh, man, we got.

Now that's a sister.

I know it's a sister. And she could be my wife.

Hell, yeah. That Cadbury. Trying to get you a little bit of that Cadbury, ain't you?

He wants some yam.

Hey, we got some pretty ones around there where we live.

Get you something with some side items, baby. Damn, boy.

Look at that. God. Oh, Lord, help me, Jesus.

My God, boy. I'm about to remodel my pants.

You know who that is? That's Nicki Minaj.

Yeah, but she could be right over here. Led with me tonight.

Okay. I didn't know you like sisters, man.

Yeah, you didn't know that?

I didn't know you like sisters. My God almighty.

I might need to hire another tongue, baby.

Fried chicken. They could cook, too.

Yeah, I need about four tongues.

I'm going to get me some.

Yeah, they can cook now. Can't nobody cook like.

They can't. Oh, man.

Well, they is crazy, but.

Well, it's true, though.

I'm just saying, if I'm going to be the guy to say it, we need to.

What about the asian women? You like your asian women or. No?

Willie, you into asian women?

I go for all of them.

That's what I'm talking about, man.

That's what I'm talking about. It never. You don't.

Hey. You don't cull them to your tribe.

That's it. That's it. We're having open casting, baby. Willie, anybody could try out, man. You running a con?

What's your favorite of all races with women. He just hit copy, paste, delete. Just now. He just fucking deleted everything.

No, he don't care, baby.

He don't care.

I don't care.

Fuck, Willie. What else, man? What else is new in your life right now? You got a new grill, you're flying across the country, you're doing big things, man.

That's all that's going on.

Yeah. And what about locally?

Hold on. They got them a new house out there in Bama. Yeah. They had a fort. They had, like, a house on wheels.

Oh, really?

They moved. It was in backyard.

Yeah. Trailer.

Yeah. It wasn't really a trailer. It was like a storage. Like a tool shed.

Yeah. And we turn it into a house.

Oh, nice. Congratulations, man.

You stand in there already?

No, we ain't got through with it yet because we've been so busy.

A lot of new things going on for. Huh? Yeah.

Cause we constantly rolling. Going here and there and here and there.

Rolling like the tide, baby.

Rolling like the tide.

Wow. Well, it's a blessing, man. You ever seen Forrest Gump? He played for the tide.

No, I didn't see Forrest Gump.

You got to see it.

Yeah, you got to see for it.

How do you know? I've seen the movie. Yeah, Forrest Gump.

Yeah.

I've seen it, like five times.

Yeah, I knew you. Definitely. Yeah.

Run, force, run.

And he. Did I say that? Man. They can't stop for it, bro.

And they can't stop him spitting, man. I'm moving out the seat. Can we switch?

They can't stop for it, bro. That's him. New TV. Just get breaking them in, bro. Shield, bro.

Run for us. Run. And he runs so fast. He broke them ankle, them braces he had on.

Yeah.

Yeah.

He ran right out of polio, man. Different times, Willie. God, I'd love to see Andrewski's new house.

Yeah, I think Roti. Willie, we're going to have you in. Could have been house season two. Yeah. You do any music ever sing a song that you may know? I feel like that's inspired by Bama, like, back where you're at. I feel like because you were going to sing it when we were shooting the skit, we didn't get a chance to.

Oh, that's sweet home Alabama.

Let's hear sweet home Alabama. Because he got to be able to compete.

We could bring the words up if you want. Yeah.

You have to do know that's better.

That way, right there.

Sweet home Alabama Lord, I'm coming home to.

Where the skies are so blue yeah.

And then he go. Roll tide.

Roll.

Yeah, we going in this one.

All right. We might have to shut it down. Willie, we love you, man.

I love you, man.

Love you, too.

Yes, sir.

Thank y'all for having me.

You're welcome.

You're always welcome here. And I hope to see you in Nashville sometime. I want to come down to a U of a game and have you and go over there with you. Yeah.

Hey, we'll love that.

Yes, sir.

Will it?

Yep. All right, man. We'll be good, baby.

Blitz mama.

Blitz. Blitz mama. Blitz. Roll.

Tie.

Roll.

Tie.

Don't give a fizz about that.

Thank you, brother.

Love you, Willie. Thank you, man. Yeah. We coming out, man. That's so awesome, dude. Thank you, bro. Yeah, dude. That's so great guy, man. Oh, a legend, man. Nobody like him.

Yeah, you can't really find too many people like him.

One of a kind, bro. He's kind of like the white flavor flave.

That's a great description. Yeah, he really is. You're not going to ever see anybody like that ever again.

They don't make more than one of them, man. I appreciate you bringing him in. And, Drew, thanks for coming through, man.

Yes, man. I love coming on here, man.

Yeah, we got to find something cool to shoot, man.

Hey, man, soon.

Game show, a movie? Cops and robbers or something.

Yeah, you know, the fans want it, though. Anytime we ever linked up, they love it, man.

Well, you're so funny, dude. I really feel lucky to get to be in your world sometimes. And all your boys, definitely.

They talk about how talented you are all the time, too. We all do.

Ridiculous.

You're so fast on your feet, we don't know how to fuck. Your brain is, like, unlike anybody else, man.

Well, thanks, bro. Thanks for coming through, dude. Oh, you won. Yeah. Cheers, baby. Nothing but the tide love you, brother.

Roll tide.

Ain't nothing but the tide I'm just falling on the breeze and I feel I'm falling like these leaves I must.

Be corner stone.

Oh, but when I reach that ground I'll share this piece.

Of mine I found I can feel.

It in my bones but it's gonna take.