What's up, guys? Well, back to views, the podcasts or ill, I have a question. This is actually a question for anybody. Since Elías is kind of like working out on his own, why doesn't he just do steroids? So it's not like he's competing.
It's not good for you. So it shrinks your balls. Just your just your balls.
Yeah, I don't think it's that good because I can't imagine you could use a little steroids, but I'll throw that drum music. This week, I went to go visit my parents for the final time. Oh, your final visit to Vernon Hills is my final visit.
They're moving out. They're officially moving to San Diego, moving out of my childhood home. So I went there as they were packing and I want to go see it. And I got there and everything was already gone. Is on the moving truck. Oh, it was all gone.
Yes. I got nothing was there. It was the saddest thing in the world. And on my way there, I did like some serious memory lane shit, like on my way, like driving to there. I went to the place I first moved to when I moved to Illinois, before I moved to Bernholz. Yeah, I moved to Skokie and I lived there from grades two to four. Wow. I went to like where I used to live.
Yeah. And I took pictures like you knock on the door. No, I knocked on the door of my friend and my buddy was there.
No way. Right. I also messaged him. Yeah. I messaged him on Facebook and I know he still live there. And he, he was my friend in like second grade. The buddy I told you the story about how my parents I filmed the video of him with his penis out. Yeah. On the family's camera. Yeah. And then my parents found the camera and they found that I was recording my friend, who was like nine years old at the time with his penis out.
That friend. Yes, that one. Yeah. So that friend I met up with him and I met him at Skokie and it was so fucking crazy because there's and his mom walked into the room and I was like at his house for like like five minutes. I was there for a little bit. And his mom walks in.
She's like, oh my God, David, how are you? It's been it's she's like it's been, what, 14 years?
No. One. Oh, my God. That's such a crazy number to say. Like, no one's ever said that to me unless in my family, like, for somebody to go 14 years, I'd like somebody to remember me. And and she was like, how are your two sisters? And I was like, great. I actually have a brother now, too. And she's like, Whatever, brother.
My brother is 11, but she just she didn't know I had a brother. Oh. Like, that's so crazy. Like it's been that long. And then the dad walked in. He was like, I remember he used to play with the marbles in the fish tank.
And I was like, yes, you guys had fish to play with the marbles. And I was so excited. And like they're they're like the sweetest people and they're so nice.
So I wanted to I brought him a gift. I want to bring him a gift I use to play video games like I used to go over to his house because my parents wouldn't allow me to video games. So we played video games at his house. So I thought it'd be fun. Sargon the new five. You did.
So I thought that would be like a cool, like little gift for him because he was like, bro, I quit like ten years, you know? He says he watches some of my twitch streams, so he's like still very much into video games.
And you're like, I used to play video games like you play every day.
Yeah. And that was really cool. And then I also wanted to surprise him and his family with ten thousand dollars. Yeah. Because I was like, I'm in the area and like I'm in the area. Let me drop 10k. So I was like I was like this is like these guys are so great.
And I like I always say, like I owe so much to the people that like helped me grow up and like figure myself out. And these guys were very much a part of that. I didn't know how to like I was like, I don't want to like I didn't have my checkbook. So I was like, I don't know how to get 10000 dollars to him. Yes. I was like, it was between I use my dad's check and and how my dad's name on it.
Yeah. Or I borrow ten thousand dollars in cash from somebody and I give it to him that way. But I thought the ten thousand dollars cash was like a little bit douchy.
So I was like, I was like how do I give somebody ten thousand dollars that are coming off.
Like here's some money. Yeah.
Or whatever. So I went to, I went to the store and I was like and I was like, I'm going to get like a Hallmark card and I'm going to like counterbalance the weight of the douchy of the cash by writing a nice card. Right. So I get there and like I'm looking for things like wrapping paper for like the cash and everything. And I find a bag and it's like one of those, like, funny bags that is like a gift bag.
And it's like a funny thing written on it. And it's just a green bag. And Goldfine it says a big bag of money right out of the bag. So I'm like, OK, well, that's fucking hilarious. I just did that instead. And I went to his house and I like I had everything wrapped up. The cash, the check, the cash. I have the cash. You got cash? Yeah, I had the cash and I had this, like, whole dilemma.
I was like, do I record this or do I not record it? Like and it fucking sucks cause like like my parents were like, don't record it.
I have a special moment. But like, even if I wasn't fucking blogging, like, I would love to record that shit because I just like want to have that memory.
But I was like I was like, this is like the moment to record it. Like I haven't seen him in a while. I don't want it to come off weird. Even though I wanted to record it. I'm sure he would have loved that it was on video just so you can look back at it. Right. I gave him the PlayStation and and then I put the little gift bag, like on the table and I was like, you can just open this one later.
And I don't think he thought anything of it because he was like, oh, this is the PlayStation. Like, this must be like a card with, like some cookies in it, that TaylorMade or something. And so then I left. I just left. I left.
Oh, you didn't even see the moment. The money. No, no. I was like I was going to be so much funnier if I leave and I leave the ten thousand dollars in cash in the bag on the table.
I mean that is so. Yeah. And then he messages me like an hour later and he's like, dude, I just missed your call, my bad. And I'm like, oh my God, I don't think he's like this.
And this is, this is like eleven o'clock at night and then. We threw it out the trash, talking about 30 minutes after that, he goes, the DMC sends me. He goes, David, bro, my parents just open your gift, bro. God bless you. You may meet my parents. So happy. My parents really need the money. God bless you, man. You gave my dad a heart attack if you're around tomorrow. My dad wants to give you an expensive oriental rug from his store.
It was so I was that was so fun.
Like I was like the coolest thing, like and like I left I left the house like with a ten thousand dollars, like sitting there on the table. And I was just like totally I was like, really? It's like we left a bomb in there. Like they have no idea what's sitting in that bag. Like, I wish I could just be a fly on the wall to just watch them open the bag of money. And did they bring up the dick video?
No, they didn't bring it up. I brought up no. So I was around him.
Like when I was hanging out with him, I was bringing back other memories. Like there was another time where we had a sleepover. I brought this up in front of his mom. We had a sleepover. I said, it's on the podcast, too. And he was too scared to go to the bathroom because where we lived, when you turn off the lights, all the cockroaches would scream and all the cockroaches would be all around the floor. We didn't live in a good neighborhood.
So like cockroaches were all over the house. And one time we turned the lights on or nine cockroaches just in the bathroom like a bunch all in the bathroom.
And he was so scared to go in, he just peed the bed in my bed, the one I was sharing with him. And that was like a memory I have with him that I thought was really funny.
And he's like, oh, I don't really remember that in front of his mom.
So I didn't I didn't tell his mom the dick story, but he was like telling me. He was like telling me. He's like, I remember. I remember you came by and you're like, we used to play video games all the time and I didn't really care for movies. But you had this movie and you were like and you were like, we have to see it.
And you were telling me how you've already seen it, but you want you want me to watch it with you.
A guy like me. And it was Star Wars episode three. And he's like, you got me into Star Wars. And like, that's from then on out, we were having, like, light saber fights, which still sounds like me. It's like it's just like so crazy. So, yeah. So I was like, really cool that I got to surprise them with with time. Can you tell about our two our in my house. Yeah, I know I didn't tell them that there's a twenty thousand dollar droid sitting in my living room.
I came in here the other day. It is so funny. It's like David was covered in JB Alvin's merch like yellow slippers. Making an Instagram story with the real life are to do it. I was like, well yeah, it's Richie Rich is just really worried about this house.
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You don't know why everybody supressed with school.
Why is everybody so I'm confused to why there are many Celebrezze and what's going on.
What's wrong with. What did I do?
Because EYLEA always walks in when we're like getting shit done. He always walks in and little inconveniences every other person in the room like. Like, like nobody else matters. Whatever Illia needs to say, whatever Illia needs to do.
In what way you came in here, took the mic and just sort of like nobody was talking.
So I took the mic and I started talking because we were on the phone. Yeah, it's on the back. Come on. Yeah. What's the story? Since you start the other day? I forgot to do my laundry, right?
Oh, my fucking goodness, bro. I can't believe you can bring this up. I told you.
Listen, the shit I'm talking about with Illia, where he just starts, like, bringing up shit that's like doesn't matter. It's not actually important.
But this is important to be fair, Natalie, this is a podcast. All right. Let technically this is important. I remember the other day we talked about masturbating for forty five minutes. Whatever.
Iliya, where are where is your political research?
What what are your findings this week?
I can't wait to listen to whatever you're OK. I don't want to say it alienable.
You are not on fucking good footings right now. I don't know if we're on terrible terms. Yeah they're not on good terms right now. I don't know what's going on, but Illia walked in.
Oh, you know, it all started with this today. I want to go do Mike Schaeffer's and Matt King's podcast.
Oh, no wonder. In a bad mood. Yeah. That put her in a bad mood for the rest of the fucking day. Oh, yeah.
Because she needed to be here for this podcast now because Illia makes decisions sometimes that don't make sense, like your logic and things doesn't make sense sometimes. And it just it bugs me because then it fucks up. It's not it doesn't only affect you, it then affects the rest of the people over. Oh, man.
Let me explain my thought process behind me going to a podcast that I had already scheduled five days in advance.
Go, OK, I can debunk everything you're about to.
Great, because I didn't know that we were going to record a podcast at three p.m. because I was not told.
When do I when do we record podcasts? Every single Sunday. We record on Thursdays, Friday, Saturday, Sundays, different days, every week, Sundays.
There's no there's no schedule. Sundays, every single day on Sundays.
We have to if we haven't had any of those other days, which we never which Sunday, everything we know sometimes we hit them schedules a little willy nilly.
He just. Huh, the sketch.
This guy just a really nice guy. Gyges my friend willynilly. The other day I was like that's another story. Yeah.
I'll tell you something important coming on top of that. I'm up a main character in this podcast. So who is. It's, it's David and Jason Hammett I should say. David you son of a bitch.
I'm holding on for dear life here David where he says, OK, whatever. It doesn't matter.
What's your story? OK, fucking eight. The story is I, I forgot to do my laundry the other day and this is like 1:00 a.m. and the next morning I have boxing, whatever. So I go into David's room and I'm like Dave. I put my laundry in the the washing machine in an hour and a half please. And I ask him like super nicely.
I was like so polite. I was like, oh, poliovirus already. See where you I was so polite, OK? And I know what I did. Can I just fucking make the story like ten seconds. No. I like you so fast. You're making it so long. No, I set an alarm for an hour and 30 because I was like, I'm going to do this for him because I said and I said, look, I will do this for EYLEA.
And guess what? I fucking I tell my stream guys one of my alarm goes off. Remind me I have to go and empty out the fucking washroom. Didn't remind, you know, an hour and a half went by and I fucking went to there and it said, forty five minutes. Bullshit. You said thirty. No wait. Forty five minutes remaining and then so. So this was in the middle of my game. So I was like, fuck it, I'll come back in a little bit stream.
Please remind me. And as I'm getting off my stream I'm saying goodbye because I'm going about my stream. Someone tips me money just so I could see their message that says, check the laundry. You go and I go. OK, great. Thank you so much, Molly. I'm going to go check the laundry. I go check it. Twenty nine minutes remaining. I go, I'm not going to be up for another ten minutes. That's it.
I'm sure you're telling me you turn your twitch off.
And you went right to bed, you didn't fucking no, no, not Instagram for 30 minutes. I told myself 20 times, if I'm up, I'm up. But then I fell asleep. But you know what I mean? I didn't I wasn't like twenty nine time to look for school right away, but I was like, OK, I'm giving up on this thing. I'm sorry I didn't get your laundry.
Where is this going? Who can I get your laundry in the laundry street. And then in the morning at six 45 when he goes boxing, I'm still sleeping.
All I hear all I hear is I can't believe I woke up to this, but it was pretty fucking loud. So I know I work.
I hear the laundry like room open and I hear EYLEA like sincerely angry go motherfucker.
I just go, motherfucking shit. And you were here. What did he say?
Yeah, he was like that asshole did not take my Landro. And then we're like standing here, he's like bitching about it with me and Caleb.
David walks out and he's like, what do you say to your mother fucker? I stood over the lawyer for 20 bucks a little pussy. I was so pissed I was there to fucking take his laundry out. It was just. Yeah, but you didn't commit. That's what my problem was. I mean, he told me an hour ago, why was it so important? Because you were going to bed. Yeah, because it was like really late.
I didn't have, like, any sleep the night before. So what you need is one thing. You need the clothes to box the next day. Yeah.
Maybe you should have done your laundry earlier in the day. Yeah, I don't. I fucked up. I totally was my bed. That's why I fucked up too. But I'm just saying I put in effort. Right. Barely. Barely.
I still put in a little bit of effort. I love how when you do get an argument you just all of a sudden come to this reasonable conclusion. You fucked up and I'm so, so fucked up. Now come here and sit on my face. Oh, no, it's not like that, Natalie, that you don't treat any other aspect of you don't treat anybody else badly. Yes, I do.
You don't. You don't. You're not rational like Élysées when you're rational. Oh, Dave, no. Let me get the shovel.
Bury this bit that when when you're angry and I and I and I do my because you do my famous David Dobek line, I go, hey, this all be over in twenty minutes.
Let's just hug it out. You get angrier. But if I do that with Illia illegals, you're right.
Why are we are you know what you did right now, as you said, you know what? I fucked up and you also fucked up. You come back here. This is like the best part. Why the fuck is fine, bro? That is literally. What are you talking about? This guy literally makes the dumbest decision. You make some decisions. Why would you leave during the part of the podcast?
Little in the middle of the park, as in the story that he is involved and he gets up to go to the fucking mouth?
Hell, it's like him and Dema had the same breast milk. I think now I understand why him and Dema, like our friends, they are a little spacey. They're so spacey. They just like make decisions and don't think of anything. Decision making is very awkward.
What I just did back there, it was my bad. I fucked up your whole life. Is that OK? Yeah, you're good. Thanks.
The mike, bro, you're part of this, I don't want to be part of this fourteeners, bro, that go OK, the problem is what you usually what you just did is you said that you did something wrong and elicited mutually something wrong.
You owned it.
You own the fact that you did something wrong. But when you own it with no wrongdoing, you know, you know, you do not ever know. You do not. al-Awadi What do you.
Natalie, now, every time we're in a fight because you have this to say. Sorry, I was cranky this morning, but.
Oh, dear Jesus, no. You do not ever say that. You know what you said. Literally no use. Let's call it even. You're right. You wake up on the wrong side of the bed in a piss ass mood and you're like, I don't know what side of the bed you wake up in the wrong room. There's nothing to do with anything. You wake up in the rocks out of bed every day, sorry that I'm in my way.
I found a good president. You have a knot in your side in your shower. I wake up in a good mood all the time, Natalie.
You will say after like, let's go over, but you go, you're wrong. You fucked up, you're wrong. And then the person has to go. No, David, no, no. Just say you're wrong and then it'll be over in twenty minutes. You missed that part of what you said. Do you say that to. No, you say you just have you make you've made other people take that very certain situation.
Really interesting. I didn't know about myself. Jay, have you had fights with me? Never say that you were you know, you just always. Right. That's my man. No, come on.
But do we ever get into fights like how is it that me, Natalie, get into fights all the time, me and Ella, but nobody else?
Well, I mean, it's not true.
I think I don't get an argument. Natalie, Natalie Natalie has like puts up with less of your bullshit than I do. So I just kind of go I'm too lazy to to fight or put up an opinion about it. Right. Because I just know, like, you do things your way and then I'm like, I know it's going to get done. So I don't bother. I never bother.
And who's going to happen? Get it done. Me, I got to drag yourself your ass out of that and help you get it done.
Someone's really also like I have nothing to do with your brand deals, which you slack on right now. Lee has a tough job here, there's no doubt. Yeah, he's got it easy. You're in love with him.
I mean, let me tell you, I was thinking the other day, yellow lights are fucking so dumb because think about housewife.
Yeah, they are red lights. It's like obvious stop. Green lights go but yellow. That's like, am I going am I stopping you dumb.
No do this is the stupidest argument. Oh hear me out.
There's no answer to no answer to your life. Do you think the number two is important when you're going one hundred and you are about to get to a light if that shit goes from green to right and one second you're fucked. There's a yet. I'm not saying that you shouldn't have something like a yellow light.
I agree that you should have said you wanted a different color. I know you can know.
I'm saying, did you know that in Europe they have yellow lights even when you're about to start going?
Hmm. Well, that makes sense. What? Yeah, that really that's the one you can admit. That's the one you can kind of like be like we don't need to not agree with me that a yellow light is like, oh, should I stay or should I go. Like, it's super dangerous. Could be super dangerous. Red is so much more dangerous if they have a yellow light.
Yeah, we have that here. A yellow light. Yeah. No, it goes green. Yellow, red, yellow. Green. Yes, yeah.
In Europe if you're, if it's about to turn green it'll go from red to yellow like start your engines, which I think is kind of ridiculous because it like really preps people to like start fires. But but yeah. And here in America they just don't use that yellow signal fun fact. If you learned anything from your stupid rant, it's that there are extra yellow lights in Europe.
Illia dyed his hair. Yes. Which he died at blonde, which I think it looks good. But you did it right when Todd did it. It was weird. He's been doing a lot of stuff that pardners also talking about things that people are doing. I want to start getting tattoos. Oh yeah. Yeah, right on, man. I want to get off my thighs. Yeah, yeah. Would probably be my first. Actually, that should be my first one.
Yeah, probably. Wow. That makes sense. Really a cute little Iron Boy Iron Man barbecue. Oh yeah.
Like a little like animated Iron Man. Do you ever get someone's name on there? No, no, I never do that. Maybe someone died like Ophelia died.
Like I get Alio tattooed. Or if Natalie died, I'd get EYLEA tattooed. Like that's why I get a name.
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Why are you looking at me like that? You just annoy me. What the fuck? Why haven't said anything? I literally have not said what I mean.
You literally just talked about how yellow lights are pointless. That that probably annoyed. I didn't say you have to admit yellow lights. I said you have to exchange.
You just learn the word omic because I used it. No, I've known the fucking cause. I've never heard you use that word.
OK, well I've never heard you use it. So you know what I saw? What I learned it from you. I learned it from future. You all right? Regardless, Ammit is a coward. He is a fucking dumb ass. And that's it. Thank you.
When I was visiting my parents, I was I was going to stay at a hotel and I got to this hotel and I was like and I made up this, like, sob story. I was like I was like to the lady that was working there, I was like, I missed my flight. It's been a long time. I wanted just the coolest room ever. So and I was like, do you have like a nice room with a view?
It was like really late. I was like, please, please help us out.
And we were getting two rooms and and she was like, OK, I can put you guys on the same floor. We can do this room and this room. And she's like, oh my God, wait. I totally just realized who you are. And then she recognized me somehow.
I don't like an older woman. I was like, I've no idea how she knows who I am. And and I'm like, she was like excited.
I could no longer give you a nice room. She's like, excited to see me know. And I was like, oh my God, here comes my end. Like I'm going to get the fucking nice room. And I was like, yeah, I'll just take whatever room has, like, a really cool view. And she's like, great, we have these two rooms here. Do you want to see the pricing? I pull that up or should I just or you just want to just book the room.
And I was like, oh, and I was like, oh my God, this is a fucking test. So I thought she was like trying to see if I can handle the big room. Right. And I was just like, moneywise. Yeah. Moneywise. And I was like, oh, don't I'm good. Don't yeah. Yeah. Price and they do that shit on purpose. Yeah. And and I thought and I thought she was going to be a fucking good deal and then I fucking get there.
Keep in mind it's fucking like three a.m. we get to the fucking rooms. It's three a.m.. Right. So I'm only going have this room for a little bit. Taylor's room was two hundred and fifty dollars which is whatever good price for mine was twenty nine hundred dollars.
Oh my nine hundred fucking your ego.
I found in the next morning I was like, hey can you do me a favor? Call the front desk and see how much. It's twenty nine hundred dollars and I'm such a fucking idiot. It was little.
My ego is my ego that got in the way though.
That was like, I was like I'm not going to check the price, I'm just going to book it. Twenty nine hundred dollars, you know, a room.
It was the fucking room you want for your birthday. You got to know. Yeah.
Twenty nine hundred not have gotten. You went and got my birthday room. You if you don't fucking dick fucking dick on accident. Goodbye. Do you not have not. No I would not pay twenty nine. You would have such a piece of shit. I got it on accident. I have been telling you weeks about this fucking room that I'm so excited for my buddy. I heard how much it cost and guess where to go. Fucking big dick me with this fucking today story is this is odd.
This is an odd. You know what?
You, David, always does this shit on accident. Jay, did I knock at the room on accident who I was. I never had a penthouse suite. I never had anything in mind. But if he's in the room, you can still get the same room. No, but I've been I've been showing this room. I've been so sad, my friends, you that he had it first.
One hundred percent. Are you serious that he does that mention Elliott, jump in here. Isn't that a little weird? Why do you care. He didn't do it intentionally.
Yeah, I because he's never even seen it. This hotel. Why don't you go to the fucking like it was a brand new hotel in the Langham didn't take any reservations past three p.m.. That's why I went to the. You couldn't just show up at the Langham and get a room.
No, you can't be called like because the covid we can't leave new policies though. You come tomorrow, the next day you're like, let me go to the Nobu.
The one night it's the only other hotel. Oh, the hotels. Come on. Whose side are you on for the.
I am not fucking commenting on this because you know you're on my side. Oh no, I'm not on your side.
Yeah, but like it was really cool because David gave me the video tour the next day. He's like, this is the one that now he's going to get. I walked in, I walked into the room and I saw the pool table. You so excited about it for a birthday and I Lillywhite Oh shit. What did you say? You know, it's like, well, because I was like, I can't have Natalie know about this cause I knew you'd be mad, but I was like, fuck, you were on the podcast so I'm going to say it.
But I get on. I got down completely on accident. I went to a room with a cool view and you told me how much your room was, but you were getting a discount because you're going to post about it, which is cool.
So I would have never paid the twenty nine hundred dollars like on my own. And I thought I was going to be like a cool corner suite with a nice view.
But yeah, I mean the room is tremendous. See all the good things in my life.
No, I was not going to get that room. Can we clear the air like what the fuck guys. Yeah.
What is going. Oh one big fucking family. We're all the same team. We're all in the same team better.
There are people I fucking I'll be on it comes second David. Well, it feels like there's something else going on here, because if Dave went to the hotel that I was planning to go to and then he told me he went and he was like, I was sick, the pool table is great. I'd be like, oh, great. I made a decision. Well, right, right. I wouldn't look at it as you fucked me over.
I think Natalie wants me.
I mean, I'm not going to go there, but.
Oh, I asked the other day if David would marry Natalie or if Natalie would marry Dave, and she said, yes, why?
So I did not say I will say yes, Natalie. But you were sitting here.
Oh, really? Right in front of her. What? Yeah. Well, what did you say? How did you say what the fuck was that?
I said if I needed to, I would know. And I was like, would you want to? And you're like, sure, that's what you said. No, I'm sorry. Time if you not. What do you mean?
If you needed to like if I was getting deported, like, yeah, I like the doctor situation. Like I would've totally married you for your green card or if I was like really struggling. I need some money.
If you're a certain area or more importantly, if I needed the new Nobu Hotel for the third night, I would also marry you.
I went on a date the other day. Triple? Yeah, triple. You were a third wheel. How do you do that? Yeah, we were through other couples with you, two other couples with me.
A triple date. Sounds like you took two girls in yourself or something.
Yeah, it was a date. It was two other couples in me. OK, we're the couples. I was Joe Analise. Oh I see. Brandon. He's funny. Yeah. His girlfriend. Would you tell me. Oh you are you fifth wheel.
Oh that's fucking crazy. Did you get some. Yeah.
You fucked the other two couples you know.
Went home with myself. That is pretty crazy. Good for you. Yeah. It's really fun. It's not actually fulfilling is the best because the feeling is like you get the right amount of attention and you add the right thing to the vibe because double dates are like, ah, I feel like there's like a lot of pressure on the two couples.
Yeah, but when there's a fifth person who really makes you feel good like a moderator and there's no yeah. It's like a moderator, there's no pressure on anybody then. Yeah. You're not the third. That's true. Like I like fifth wheeling. It was pretty fun.
I mean I'm going to be doing it a lot. I think so. Yeah.
I mean, I also agree that you would be doing that a lot. I think too.
I did this thing random nodding. Yeah. What's that last night. It's basically it's an app, it's called Random Narika or something like that. It's this thing that people can doing in quarantine. And you, like you ask a question and you try to like manifest something. So basically you ask a question, you manifest it right. Like something you really want to know. And then it gives you a coordinate, gives you like a GPS coordinate, and then you go to it what it like someone and like so you'll go like I want.
Will I be able to find love tonight. That's question. Yeah.
And then they'll just give you a you coordinate a coordinate. Yeah. And you go there and there's all these stories like these kids they found like a dead body, there's all this stuff. And so then we did it last night. What was your question? It was is is money really the secret to my happiness? Oh, wow.
OK, so that's that's like what it was. I was pressured. Like, think of something.
How did you ask it as you type it in or do you say no, no, no I they, they, they sat with me with the app and they were like, OK, go ahead, ask a question to yourself, but don't tell us, is this more than an app.
It's an app. Who sat with you like some of my friends have told me about the app. Oh, I thought like you want to like some readers.
Oh no, no, no, it's not. Anybody can do it. It's called random narika, OK, anybody can do it and we can download.
This isn't a promo for the app to use. Hashtag had said it like three times. OK, I don't even know if that's what it's called.
OK, ok, so I'm sorry. So yeah. So you download the app, you ask a question, it'll take you to a GPS coordinate and people have gotten some really weird shit doing this and you can look it up. So anyways, we did it last night. The coordinates led me to this fucking area that I walk to when I was like married and miserable every day.
No Yarbro, Seattle, Seattle Drive like off Mulholland. It led me to the coordinates. And then not only that, if fucking there was a sign dog what it was a sign with written shit on it. What are you talking about. There was a sign it says The Kiss of the Sun for pardon. The Song of the Birds for mirth. One is near God's heart in a garden then anywhere else on earth.
What are you saying? Time out. Time out. Where was the sign? Where are you saying the sign was the sign?
There was a sign. Show me the picture. The sign was there. Oh, shit. There was a sign in the actual ground, but like, yeah, like you can read whatever you want into it. Of course, I could have said, like, am I going to have another child? And I would have read something into it. But still it took me to a place where like I went there every day for 10 years. OK, let me try this.
Go ahead. No, we won't know because we have to go to the place.
OK, I have to think of a question in my own head. Yeah. It's going to generate where I have to go to find this answer. Yes. OK, I'm going to say it in my head. Hold on. Here we go. It took me two, two, three four zero North Air Drive, Burbank, California, should we go knock on this house?
I guess it is a house. It is, yeah.
OK, so what I thought of was where can I get some really good enchiladas, asshole? That's what I thought of. I thought of work at work and find love or like find like happiness like some real serious shit.
So we go there and it's just a beautiful girl.
I was just going to play video games. I was going to go play tennis and maybe make some Tic Tacs.
How are you? OK. Should I go drive to this house and knock on the door and see what they say? Yeah, we need to go to. OK, so he's so excited he's going to find love.
But we got to go. This could be it. There's a sign that says you will never you will never get this.
Let's go. Let's go. Jay while the holidays may look a little different this year, the season of giving is in full swing.
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Hey guys, sorry for the audio change. Jason and I are literally on the road. We've been driving for eighteen minutes to get to this destination where apparently my answer, my question is going to be answered. How do you like random nodding so far Dave. I even forgot the app. I forgot what it was called because it's been so fucking long that we used it a little. It's a twenty four, it's twenty five minutes away or three minutes away.
Now it's at Bel Air Park. It doesn't even look like the fucking house. So it's not like I get to knock on somebody's door and be like, Hey, are you single? Here we go.
Belaire turning left on Balaguer OK, the road is closed here for love. The road is closed. There's a group of people, there's two girls and one guy standing here. I'm going to ask if they're looking for a lot of.
Hi, are you guys by any chance looking for love? OK, it's a complete bust. Is there an ice cream truck? Oh, my God. Ice cream. I love ice cream. OK, I'm going to I'm going to go up this fucking hell, I guess. OK, now it's just to walk up the hill. It's a beautiful view here. The weather's really, really nice. The view. So pretty dude. I just think I'm in love with The View.
I just kissed Karina.
I'm going up the hill now. My friends are a little bit behind me.
It's sort of a track. The way that this is is like I'm in a road behind a bunch of homes and on one side of me, just a beautiful view. And on the other side are homes. But I think the backyard of homes. So I don't know if I'm going to see anybody here. Do I wish I could see this place? I'll put my inside story just so you guys can see it. Did this. It really looks like a place you could just get murdered.
How how far are we? Not seven hundred feet. Seven hundred feet away.
Dave, I think I see a sign that means something over here. It's a senior and disabled shuttle pick up. That's for me. Come on, Jay. Stay focused to two hundred fifty feet on the left.
Hello. Yeah. Oh yeah. Hello. Hi. Are you ready for that. Yeah, me too. Well, I brought you here some stupid at my older friends told me about. Oh my God. How old are you. I'm twenty four. I'm twenty four. No shit David. I've got it. Look at this sign. Not a public road. No unauthorized vehicles allowed beyond this gate. Not a public road. David, it's so clear.
Don't you see it now? Your love life is not your the love of your life is not going to be found in a public fashion.
Well, it's not going to be public. It's not going to be like somebody else who's famous or something need to find a regular girl.
I would say that there's another sign right below the sign you just read that says notice dog owners indicate the love of your life, probably as a dog.
But also, you're not seen on a public road, are you? Fucking with me. Fucking with you. You're not reading into this. You don't see it. It says it right. For your goddamn thing. You're an asshole. I fucking I hate I hate that I came this far with you because you're delusional, bro. It's a fucking street sign. The one about there's no smoking in this area. What does that mean? You're supposed to read it.
Do it. Do what? What do you think she's going to be sitting here with a boner? No, you fucking moron. I'm not a public road. That's why you're reading a clue.
You're not supposed to you're not supposed to have your if you're not going to find your life in a pub, Jamieson, like a fucking lunatic, you're not going to find the love of your life like in Hollywood or like someone else, like on Instagram.
Like you're going to find somebody based off like your celebrity. You're going to find somebody based on who you are. And that's where you need to keep looking. No unauthorized vehicles allowed. So that's not going to get through.
No, I can hear you, Jay. I fucking hate you. Wait a minute. You knew before crooner, you knew before YouTube, so Kiruna does have a chance. Look at the how that road is closed off and that roads closed off. And the other one we tried to get because of your closed off. That's what it's saying. You've got to open up. Weird.
It is kind of really fucking weird if you think about it. It could have sent us anywhere. Could have sent us to Pepe's pizza. It sent us here. Oh, shit. But what do I do know, I don't know, you got to open up a corner right now. I don't know. No, you're right, OK, you're really reading it. But that is pretty that is pretty fishy because this is like there's not many there's not many intersections.
You can end up in L.A. where every road is closed off.
That is kind of funny. And I wish you guys can see the shit I'm going to put on my and the stories here. Guys, this is I'm going to put it on the day the podcast comes out. You'll see it on my own stories. This is the road we're at currently, guys, and that was the audio for my sister. Everything is closed off and that's where we came from.
This is so bizarre.
You know, she's standing just walked around, guys. We're like an empty parking lot and just goes, I think we're missing something. I'm like, oh, this is a fucking escape from this is real life.
She just squatted down and then took her index finger and rub it around along the ground and then looked at it and said, I think we're missing something, Chief.
She's licking the polls, tasting for what might have been a possible suspect or am I possible love?
I think I think Jason got it. My Saorview detective skills are a really interesting day right now. I will take him to the captain.
I do. Jason, I honestly, as much as I think this is all bullshit, I think that's a pretty interesting sign that I am closed off my back to the studio.
Hey, guys, we've Natalee's mom here. Her road tripping has led her here for the next week. Were you stationed up in smoke for the time being? What brings you to town?
She has a piece of tape over her webcam, as I can tell, on a computer that is the most off the grid gen thing I've ever seen.
Do you want to talk about paranoia with cameras? Well, yeah.
Why do you put it? Why do you put a piece of tape over your webcam so that you can't see me who can't see you?
Usually people put a thing on there on their laptop camera so no one sees them masturbating.
That's usually why.
Oh, that's the only reason I would think that it's there. Is there another reason that it's there?
Well, maybe you seen Jen masturbates a lot in front of the computer, but maybe she's like, you know, conspiracy theories or thinks the government is watching her or something.
Natalee's mom. Do you always listening. They're listening to us right now. Well, yeah, it's the Views podcast.
A lot of listen, I saw almost two million other people.
I think she was a little mad at the roast joke that we did about her. The roast video. Oh, she was the first thing she said. Oh, yeah. What did you what did you think about Jason's jokes during his role? What was your joke?
Well, we don't need to repeat the joke. Would you repeat the joke is that everyone saw the video. Go see the video. Can we repeat the joke?
Just so we know, I said Jason is always hitting on my mom and always getting rejected. He should go ahead on someone else like Jonah or someone.
Yes, somebody has some garbage or something.
Jonah, or like I said, garbage. Yeah. And then what did you say then? I said, sorry, we got a late start tonight.
I was eating out mad. I was eating out Natalie's mom in her RV instead of a milk bang.
I did a muff dive, but I'm thump. What did you think when you heard that? Or you flattered or were you. Oh, I wondered. Sure.
If I should be flattered or offended. Yeah, right. Right, right. It was kind of like I just had all these mixed emotions. Yeah. I would have no idea how you would react to what is it. But I mean I would say left.
I was really surprised when it was the the, the lead story on your Instagram. A promo.
Oh I did use that as a promo. I was like I didn't want to use anything about David because I got a phone call from him, like, take that down. So I did use you. Yeah, it was a little risque for Instagram.
It would have been ten times better if you were there. Damn it. Oh my God. I would have been.
You should come to the next should do the rest of Natalie's mom. I couldn't handle it. I couldn't handle it. You guys were too terrible to me. I'd, I cried the entire time. I'd be fine.
Right. All right, guys, that's all the time we have for this podcast. Thank you guys for listening. Go buy the new merch. Go support Jason. Go buy his. Do you have numerous that comes out. No, they won't allow me to have merch anymore. I will go buy my merch in support of Jason and I'll give them I'll buy them a pizza from the proceeds.
I will see you guys later. My name's Jeff by.