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What's it like to use the podcast where we got rid of Natalie?
I know I've been listening to your comments and we have replaced David Leukocytes, the octopus teacher who replaced her with the octopus teacher.
It's great to be here, David. I want to let you know that I fell in love with a shark, so I'm doing a lot better now. The shark is not the thing that killed the octopus. Yes. Yes. Quite a twist of fate there. But, you know, it turned out the shark was actually pretty sexy and I love him, love him more.
So it's a lot of fun. All right. Can we start the podcast with such a horrible joke?
Well, people or people want to tune into the race.
You know, I went to the aquarium in Long Beach and they had the craziest octopus there. And it was so fucking cool after seeing that you're sexy. Yeah.
This thing was you're like, oh, you know what? I get it now. I got it. Like, the tentacles are coming up on the glass. And I was like, oh, this thing is magnificent.
And he fucking the time music. I want to open up the podcast with a question. Oh, OK. Jesus sounds like an idiot. I have a question. OK. Go look at me.
Or what the fucking talks like that. I don't know.
I can't believe I just did that on my own volition. What do you know? What how long would you last imprison me?
To be honest, is the last mean. I don't know. I'll be alive.
But when would I want to leave? Probably immediately before I start. I'm ready to go now. Guard. Guard. Please call Taylor.
I don't think I'd last in prison at all. I mean, I've always said I always I think it's crazy to ever go to prison. I was like I would rather die. And I've always stood by this. And you always disagree with me.
Oh, yeah. We've talked crazy. This guy is like, what is my living? My biggest fear other than getting sick.
You do all right. They give you a job there. No, I don't want to do it. I would never want to do it. Good. You'd run like the audio visual department. I'd rather be. Why you'd run the audio visual department. The morning announcements.
Yeah, you do the morning announcements. Good morning. Cook County Prison State Penitentiary. Oh, I love this guy today, Lewis. He did get shanked, but he will be making a full recovery. Mark is serving solitary confinement for the next eight days. Mark, we wish you the best.
I've thought about it. You've thought about being in prison. I feel like I had low key, like, thrive. Yeah, I know. Why think surrounded by one hundred women. I love that. I was like, sign fucking up. I thrive. I thought about being in prison. I'm in love with women. No fucking right now I'm just saying. I mean, have you watched this new block. No, but I'm sure it's great.
I would 100 percent be like I would like have my own squad.
First of all, I'd be so fit. Everyone says it's like I just want to go to prison to get fake little or nothing else to do the work. I'd be so definitely kill it in prison. I know that for. And then I'd be ahead of my pack, but my pack would be like kind of peaceful. But it's also I don't fuck with us. It's like, you know, and I don't know what I'd be in for. Hopefully nothing crazy, but like I feel like I'd come out from prison and I like have all these like prison friends.
And then they'd all come out and then I'd like help them and we'd have like fucking community. You'd be sick. Yeah. It would be sad.
It's in you OK. She wants to send you to prison or will you bail me out like after a couple of days.
I will send you there for a year and we'll have a beautiful podcast.
When you come back, you're going to need some time to, you know, get your shit together, make some friends. You're going to prison for a year just for our podcast. She comes back. I'm going minutes story. Don't let it go. But it was like, why?
I was like, honestly, not much happening. Read some books and got some tattoos. And that's about it.
Oh yeah. Day in prison would be good. Taylor and President Taylor would become someone's like like showers too much.
I don't think that's your problem.
That's killed by a shower. Does it do thing. I don't think it's valid for a woman. What do you mean? It's a very penis. That's a very penis thing. The shower. What do you mean? Like, if you're not you're not saying you're scared.
She's she say she thinks it's dirty, cleaned. Oh. And showers with me and you're like you're not going have a dick in your ass. No, no. I think, I think you'd be fighting in prison. You shower every day.
Yeah. You should get dirty. So you know how I know we've talked about my nudes a lot.
I remember how we were. Oh, let's talk about this. Just fucking show it to them so it does.
All right. So you know how I told you guys that, like, once I did like a photo shoot with my friend, she focuses on like nude bodies and like very sexual things and like that's just her thing. And so once I did the shoot with her, it was like literally we were on vacation. Pictures you had in your resume. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Oh, I me.
So she took some photos of me and they're like she on her Instagram. She has all these kind of photos of herself too. And so she posted one like this is almost two, three years ago. You can't see my face. So I, she, I knew what I was like. It's fine. You can see my face, it's fine, whatever. And then since then she's deleted them and then she done me that day and she's like, dude, look at this.
And she was like on her discover page. And she somehow happened upon this girl's profile and was looking at her stories. And this girl in her stories had my photo and was promoting her only fans and was like swipe up for my only fans. And it was the photo of me, like my photo. You can't see my face, but I obviously know it's me. My friend knows it's me. She took the photo and so she D.M. the girl and she's like, hey, like this isn't you like this is my photo.
Like, where'd you get this? Do you mind. Like can you take it down.
Like what the fuck a girl. Girls like you're that nice of a body or someone who's going to promote that out of anybody. They could have pulled off Google image. They were like this is the one.
I mean but that's the thing. And so she was like, and they don't follow each other, though. They don't follow each other. They don't follow each other. As though she was also kind of weird. This photo's been deleted for a while, so I'm like, where the fuck did she get this? And the girl answered and was like, Hey, like, I'm not taking it like kind of like, bitch, I'm not taking it out.
Also, I got the photo of another only fans, lol. Oh, so she didn't even get it from my friend, which means that this photo is on someone else, only fat and they're fucking making money off my photo of my body.
It's time to have your face and it doesn't have my face.
I mean luckily, I mean obviously they couldn't use it if it had my face in it. But like, they just me like it's my it's just my body and I'm in underwear. It's not nothing crazy. And it's just like I can't do anything about it. It's like. So there's no actual nudity. Just you in your underwear.
No. Yeah. It's just me in my underwear. It's like you can. You can. Yeah. That's crazy. It's fucking insane. And I'm like well I don't know, I can't do anything about it. And I told my friend I was like just fucked up like I should put this fucking on and only find like this bitch is promoting her only fan.
Jason has the same story too, except they use this picture for an obituary. We actually know no you no Forest Lawn in Burbank. Yes.
Yeah, I'm all over the cast, Jason, but be a really funny like Brandi, if you got like a brand new forest lawn, like a funeral home. Hey, are you like me? Are you going to die soon? Come pick your casket, Jay.
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This was interesting. This was very interesting. Come to the dinner. Yep. Here comes the dinner.
David, you're so smart. OK, so I got a text last week. Really nice text. Hey, let's all go have we're all going to go have dinner Thursday night. And I was like, huh. Really. David wants to have dinner. David Mr Order before I get there so I can eat in ten minutes and be back in my car. I was like this is weird, this is some weird shit. And then I started to text back something snarky, you know, and I was like, no, you know what?
I'm going to be positive and then be like, you know what? Maybe Dave starting starting some new businesses. Let me be positive. And I wrote back great. I'd love to blow.
We go to the dinner, we get there. It's beautiful. Very nice. This motherfucker leaves in the middle of the dinner.
No Ronaldsay team Dobek meeting. I left that for an hour and forty five minutes. And how I know is because Jason was timing me, he was curious how long it would take for me to leave the dinner.
I took bets I bet. I bet fifty minutes and I stayed longer than anybody thought I was going to stay. Oh no no no.
That doesn't mean anything. What do you mean.
We all have a low opinion of you know, I genuinely thought you were going to stay for the whole dinner. I thought that you were the one that instigated the conversation about having the dinner, thinking it's such a great idea. We should get the whole team together. We done some really amazing things. And then you fucking piece.
I was I was in like when I when I started the dinner idea, I was like, I'm in a good mood. And then did it came around and things just ruined my mood. So I was not there. What was your thought process? I don't know.
I just wasn't maybe like maybe we just kind of like grow up, mature and, like, suck it up a little bit. I did.
David walks up to the table and he was like, yo, you made up some lies. Like, I got a surprise for you. Oh, I got a big surprise. No, I wasn't surprised.
I mean, he gave me this fucking ring from Cartier, uh, to do that during Tito over here, it was here and I was like, he couldn't give it to you. It was a special thing. No, it's bullshit. Now to back me up that ass. I gave my ring to give me the bad ass. You could have given it to him. You see, I'm twenty four hours a day. You could have give it time to you.
What you need to happen at that point, because the vibes were right is the vibes were the vibes weren't right because you walked up to the table when you go. Come on guys. What do you want me to say? This is fucking miserable.
Did JJ we're walking home, walking away from a restaurant and like, it's all quiet because I said that.
I felt so bad then you left in the Tuesday night to tell that little fucker he tried to move in on your two seater and ditched me there like that. And he's like, is there room in the car?
And he was like, no, Joe, there's no room.
And then so then Joe and I were stuck there talking about you the entire night, talking about David dead after you left. Then everybody's like, I think David likes the color blue. I think he likes the color blue, too. What do you mean? This is like it's all the people that you pay to fucking work for. You sitting there talking about you and me sitting there like, oh, it was weird. It was it was like going like a David Daubert fan conference or something.
Honestly, it was a business dinner for your business. That's why I started to hate it. Yeah, I know. I know. That's why, like, I'm just giving you shit. I started to hate it because, like like I was hearing stories and like, people were like sharing stories of their best David moments. And I was like, what the fuck? It felt so weird. I know Jack was like Jack was like, do you remember the secret meeting back in New York?
And I was like, yeah, it was a pretty normal meeting. And Jack was like, David sat on the floor, the negative equity. And I'm like, I don't recall sitting on the floor. Maybe I asked about equity. And I was like, it was like this big like, look how crazy David is. And I was just like, this is a weird thing for me to sit on.
Like, I'd rather go and you guys can have this discussion on your own. Like, I just don't want to be there for that.
It felt like there was one person that that was like the story you just heard was the only incident that I know.
There was no there was a lot of that, bro. That was a lot of it. That's why I left. I was just like, I can't do it anymore. It was little left and right. I'm telling you, I was there. I know I left. It was fine, like whatever. And then I texted.
I texted John might be answer me because I know Joe is the most honest man. Just be honest with me. What are they saying right now? And he's like, surprisingly, you're fine.
Surprisingly, no. It's pissed because they they all started drinking. And so then I drove his car home. Right. And then, David, the one thing you miss, well, you probably seen it before, but I'd never seen it before. Fucking we got in the car and Taylor and Ella and Natalie were in the backseat and they they were drunk and they put on wop and they got really fucking dirty.
Like Joe and I were in the front like, oh my God, like Joan are looking at each other like, is this happening? Like it was Taylor like, is this in the three days away from pussy?
It's like, whoa, it was something else that was fun part of the night. And then Iliya gave you a card. A ring. Yeah, he gave me a card. It is it does it. So this is what happened. Well, I'll be honest. I'll be honest. Yeah. Yeah. So, so, so we're sitting in the back. We went, we all go to the bathroom and I go really. I'm like, yeah, I got to get out of here.
I know you guys need to go. Thank God. And I go. I go. We all come up with an excuse and he goes, OK, I'll just say I have a surprise for you. And I go, but what if someone asks you and he goes, well, I'll just get you a surprise. I get you something, I'll get you something. So we go back to that. We go back to the dinner, we go back to the dinner, and it looks like we have to go.
I have a surprise for David. Yeah. I mean, the worst lie I knew right away. No, no, no, no one believed. And then Meghan goes dead ass and he looks at me and I go and he goes dead ass and goes, What the fuck? And then we leave. You know, obviously that whole thing happens with me saying miserable, whatever. And then we leave. We're in the car and is like on the phone with Batebi, see what stores are open because he's like, what do you want?
What do you want? Well, I like TV's trying to see where he can buy like the biggest flat screen. And I'm like, dude, I'm like, you're like thinking too much about it. Like just go home and surprise me with something random, like something random. Like I don't care what it is like if you don't tell me what it is, it's a surprise. And you didn't land that ass. I'm like, let me go in there going a sock and pull it.
I'll be like, this is my lucky sock. And it's like we get back to the house. It's just me and him. I got to lay down because I'm just not feeling well. So I lay down and and Illia comes into my room and he goes, I close your eyes and I go, OK. And he goes, here's this. I want you to have this. And it's his ring. It's his Cartier ring that he's had for like two years.
And I'm like, wow, you want me to have that? And he's like, yeah, I was my surprise for you. And he's like, it's my lucky ring. I'm like, I don't think it's your lucky ring. You only you had it for like two years and they're like three years.
My like you ran raw like every day. Yeah. It's because you wear it a lot. Doesn't mean you're my only ring.
I thought it was and it was just really funny that like now I had this Cartier ring because EYLEA was forced to give it to me just so you can leave this party.
That's pretty good side of the story. And I have a ring and then we got back and fucking an hour later the girls got back and they brought home a kitten. Someone dropped the cat off at our doorstep and it was in a bag and in the bag there's a click bait hoodie. The cat and a makeup bag was really fucking scary. And that's it. And the bag just and then we we took the cat over and we we give it away to one of our friends.
Last podcast, we talked about these tick tock.
I was called the Vibe crew and they're like they're like eight to like 14 year olds, super young crowd, super young crowd. And the last podcast, we also talked like the dirtiest podcast. We. Never had all we talked about was 60 ing like it was true, it was like the grossest podcast we've ever had super sexual. And it was so funny because I go on to Instagram the next day when the podcast goes out and it's just it's just geotagging, an Instagram story.
It's like seven members of the of the Vibe crew hanging out in their Tesla, holding a cell phone up to their ear, saying, we just listen to David Dobberstein.
We heard them talk about the vibro like it's like fucking these like little 10 year old people and like they're all just listening to this. So I almost don't want to bring them up again because I don't want them to listen to this and hear that we're getting the Vibe crew along with all the other fucking shit we talk about. But Vibe Crew, we love you guys. Stay true to to what you're doing. I support you guys. I'm excited, excited to see what you guys got coming out.
I was sitting with myself thinking with my thoughts the other day. I don't know. I thought I was kind of crazy that, like, I was thinking about the universe and space and things, like really weird me out. And I was not high. I was just sitting there and thinking about a bunch of random weird shit. And I was thinking and I wrote it down because maybe you guys have an opinion on it too.
But isn't it kind of crazy how we don't really know, like why we're here on Earth or how we're here on Earth and how there's like different life forms or if there's different life forms?
Yeah, we talk about that literally. Like what the part this what are you in the second grade. Welcome to astronomy. Yeah.
Fucking nuts. I thought you had like a new fucking idea. Yeah. We've been discussing this all the time. It's like the most simple question in the world today, Natalie. How is that?
Because it's simple because like obviously no one, you know. Nobody knows. Yeah, but how does nobody know.
Oh that's I mean that what do you forget? First of all, I'm surprised that, like, you know what that is? It's an entry level question for those types of talks. Right. Like it's like a very like, oh, I'm new to exploring the world.
Like you you almost always an alien that's trying to fit in. I mean, it's literally like what is the point of our existence like, it's just like not now. I get I get it. You sound like a crazy man. Yeah, you sound bizarre. What's an existential question we all come across. Right.
But this late in the game, I think on there's a lot I think about this a lot. I just. I know. Well, I have I have so funny because I completely know what you're saying.
Right. We're on the same page here. Yes. OK.
Oh, Nathalie's agreeing. I asked myself that question every every year.
Right, right, right here. What's my purpose?
Right. Right. It's nothing personal.
It's just the fact that it was written down and it was like and it was like and she started with like I have something I thought of like like like Gandhi over here just came up with this, like, what is life. Okay, here's another one I wrote down. Oh, boy. OK, so I also was thinking it's crazy how air works.
That's my third one actually. Really. Really.
I read it and I read it is actually a third one.
It is I think anyway. OK, now there's three things in our notes and OK, our third one is literally what is turbulence pockets of air, but there's really nothing there.
It's so bizarre. No good.
OK, I didn't read your second one. Read the second one. What's your take on it? Well, this was my first one. I wanted the second one with the universe. I thought that would be more interesting. The first one is, isn't it crazy how time is all relative? Like, what does it mean to not have enough time in the day? Who made up time like someone just interesting.
That's cool. That's interesting. Oh, thanks, guys. That's cool. What way? Cooler than your second one. Yeah. The second one was like, well, the second one's bigger, I think. Yeah, but everybody thinks of the second one like well that's what I think.
And that's why I think so crazy about the second one is that everyone fucking thinks everyone knows it and.
Yeah, but it's like, it's like that's like what starts the discussion. What did you think I was trying to do if I could win the Nobel Peace Prize. The question was so boring I fell asleep.
But yeah, that's that's it.
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I got pulled over today. Oh yeah, I saw that. What the hell happened right now is not done and not done. She wants to find out where Cassidy has come from.
He got pulled over today on my bicycle, didn't have a helmet and said that the other day. I was like, why doesn't he have a helmet? And then I said and then I said, oh, I think in California, you don't have to wear a helmet. Right? You you don't have to wear one in Illinois.
You have to wear one in California. What did the guys I got pulled over. I got pulled over for not wearing a helmet. And the guy like, you know, first off, I'm like he's like he's like, pull over, go. Right? And he's like, take my God, I hate that.
Like, he took the key out, like, honestly on speakerphone. He's like, take the key out of the pool. I can throw it on the sidewalk. Oh, that's dramatic. You get serious.
Every biker now runs fucking crazy. Yeah. Like he thought I was going to run shit so I threw the key on the sidewalk. I get off the bike and it's like, so you're not wearing a helmet and you also I can't really see your license plate. And to both I was like, I was like, yeah, like I have no excuse for not wearing a fucking helmet, right. I was like, yeah. Like my bad like that's all I could say.
Like, I'm sorry.
Excuse me. He's a fucking dumb ass. And so and so he made he made me if I can call a friend to bring bring me my helmet. Are you. I was a friend. I had to call David to bring my helmet down. But what part of town were you in the studio setting up.
Oh so not that I was really like that's good. But usually cops don't care like a dumb ass. I've passed by like a good ten cops without my helmet really. And like, they just kind of look at me weird. But, you know. But this cop cared. Yeah, probably. We're going to have that guy fix it for you.
You want to explain your reasoning that you gave to me of why you don't wear a helmet? Oh, yeah. First of all, this is the first thing I said when you got this bike, I might wear a fucking helmet. Like you're just going to die.
Yeah, I'll explain when I'm riding a bike, I want to be free. I want to be free like a bird. Like, I just want to fucking like if I have a helmet on, I feel like I'm in a cage. Claustrophobic, like annoying fucking hot. If I have another helmet, I'm just like free, just chillen achacha, that's literally like the audio will play at your funeral.
I wanted to be a bird, but I get that piece of Fedorovich that's like my with the bird.
That's like when they say like, you know, the guy like rock climbs and like yeah, he died, he loved doing it. That's what he loved to do. Right. So it's OK.
I definitely see myself dying in like a bike. You love it that much. The Akula dying. Yeah. Yeah. Well, there you have it. Not yet.
Maybe in like 20 years. But I'm down here now. You don't get to make that decision. I do. Because, like, I'm I'm actually very careful on my bike when you dial and it's like something like that.
How do you want me to react?
I honestly, I don't want you to be sad at all and just know that, like, I went out being happy. What if you didn't?
And I want you to I want you to play this at my funeral. Actually, I'll think of something to play my funeral.
And what song do you want me to play at your funeral? When I when when there's walk out music for lipgloss, OK, for when I walk out when I walk out to talk about you, you want lipgloss to play.
Yeah. OK, we've got to have class. I don't know about my lip gloss.
My lip gloss is cool. What if you don't die happy. What if you're torn apart by bears.
Oh well that has nothing to do with him being on a motorcycle unless he's driving through Utah then yes, that would be dangerous.
Well, OK, but it's so funny. Like I get like all these dirty looks from like other motorcyclists, like all these other bikers, like I'll pass them, I'll like be friendly. Yeah. And they'll like give me the signal like wear my helmet. Oh yeah.
I want to say something, I want to say something. I've been holding this for a while to me because this is going to affect you the most. I want this is this is actually going to be something that's going to a lot of people are maybe going to be upset with me about after I say this, they're going to to another dinner. They're going to think I'm naive, they're gonna think I'm stupid. And I and I agree with them to some point.
I do think that this is this is how I currently think. I don't you know, I'll get older. I'll maybe I'll change my mind.
But right now I'm about to say something pretty controversial. So so, you know, buckle down. Mm hmm. I, I absolutely I cannot describe to you how much I fucking hate nature.
God, I hate nature.
Didn't you just go on like a crazy walk in San Francisco and stuff?
I just went to Utah. Yeah. And I cannot put a finger. I cannot explain to you how much nature just aggravates me. I have I have never been. So what does that mean.
I don't know. And I never knew I could be so angry. I don't like it. I was just like, what do you mean?
It's like New York City in your country. I was just on a hike and I was like and like I was on a hike because I was, you know, I like to run every day. And now I had no choice. I was going to go hike. So I was hiking through the mountains and I was just everybody I saw I just got angry at. I was like, why are you here? Like, I was so mad.
I was so mad. I don't know what it was. I was just getting so angry. And it feels so wrong because everybody loves nature.
You can't run in his nature. Do it. And maybe. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So you go when you go hiking you're pissed that you're out. I'm not pissed. I'm just like there's something I don't know if it's my family that like made me hate it, but my family was always they love the outdoors and like they love deep seeded maybe but I cannot.
Everything with him is deep seated trauma that he refuses to actually confront.
But I hate it. I hate it. I was so angry. I was just I just I because I don't get it. And because you never like the beach when I go to the beach, what is so cool about something that's been there for exist like for every fucking it's been there for millions of years. What is so. OK, I can tell you for me it's cool.
That's cool. I can tell you for me. Yeah it's calming. I don't see, I don't find a comment. I find it. That's fine.
It feels like, it feels like, it feels like everything that I've worked for has just been erased and I'm stuck with the dirt in the grass and the leaves. What's cool to me is a skyscraper like something that somebody made. I mean, somebody that's like cool too. But it's like it's so much cooler than nature. Like if I want to be calm, I want to sit. I want to sit and watch, like, look at a skyline.
I mean, the reason why you have lights and you have a city and you way have a home is because of nature.
Like that's what's so beautiful about it is like it naturally occurs like nobody made it. It just literally started and exists. Right.
When you're in nature, don't you go, oh wow. This is what it was like before. Like everything. Now, you never sit there and go like I honestly don't. It's not just trying to say this is such fun and not like nature. I just no one thinks you're edgy. I just not like to. Sure, I because a lot of times devs look cool. A lot of times we take the opposition and like I say, things like just to get a rise out of people.
But right now I'm being genuine, like in a private room. I mean, it doesn't make sense. Why would frustrate you?
I don't know. I don't want to keep talking as if I was pissing people off. But like that, that is just how I feel about nature. And I really don't think too many people agree with me on this one.
This is the one where I'm going to take I got so many I don't usually get a lot of DM's. I got a lot of times this week about the podcast last week about defending Illia, about the sixty nine thing.
They were so funny, their Jay Daku, so much for defending EYLEA. I'm so proud of you that you backed Eliab. They told many people like he's a fucking chimp. So many people are on my side. You a lot of the guys that were defending Illia were fucking look just like probably a white BMW in a Gucci watch is a I just realized I was joking about the white BMW. But you actually drive a white BMW and we're Gruchy Watch, which were both joke.
Did you get a lot of advice about the podcast? We just, you know, was I the only one? Nope, he's got it. So he's out.
You know what I thought was really weird the other day? I was watching a tick tock and it was this it was this little girl being held by her father, like maybe two, three year old girl, I don't know, very young. And they're at a bakery and they're watching the baker bake and the baker blows flour like blows flour right onto the glass. And with the flour, he draws a smiley face and like, it just makes the girl smile and you just fucking you just think to yourself, holy fuck, did this baker just influence this girl to be a fucking like chef herself when she grows up like this, is this interaction going to mean so much to her because she's so young and she's so easily, like, imprinted on her, whatever?
Like, I think about that all the time with my kids, the little things I say it like that. I just fucked them up for life like that, you know, little backwards.
You know what I just thought about?
Maybe the reason I love food so much is because I would have so many positive interactions at restaurants.
I know it sounds crazy, but this is real. Like all my birthday parties as a kid at restaurants, always eating like Portillo's, lots of birthday parties of which. Oh, that is so interesting with and my parents are divorced. I'd only see my dad at dinner like you take me to dinner. Oh, we were having a good time.
Jason, would you have an interaction with like a baby raccoon crackdown on. Right. I'm going to be like that raccoon digging through the trash. Fuck you guys.
We your birthday this Friday. Your birthdays Friday. Yeah. What do you do for your birthday? Nothing.
Just hanging out because we can't do any fucking hate birthdays j hate birthdays. They should be called death days birthday.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Hold on. Fuck birthdays man. It's really like it's a year closer to your death that you're running out of fucking time.
It's really the most negative fucking out. So that's not why it's negative. Yes, it is one of the many reasons there's probably 15 reasons that I think it's negative because everyone just like puts so much pressure on. Yes.
Yeah. There's there's a lot of pressure on, like for it to be really good and like, fun, like, fuck that.
Like, I just wanted to be a regular day.
Like, if it's fun to feel pressure. Yeah, there is. There's so much, there's so much something that's fun.
You know, it's it's like you're supposed to celebrate your life.
You guys, you guys live in this world where everything has got to be like fucking eight doesn't have to be epic. I don't agree.
And I know you and your friends hanging out on the streets, like in the back of our minds, like, oh, your birthday, like, hey, you fucking hate when people wish me happy birthday. I wish people didn't know it was my fucking. Oh, I hate birthdays, but I love them because, you know, I hate them.
I love my birthday. I love it. I get texts all day, all in high school.
Your popularity was judged by how many people said Happy birthday on your birthday.
All Yeah. Wow. Yeah, that's how that's how I would check to see who was the most popular.
Literally go home at school, like after school and like go check the number to make sure it was like over a hundred.
Yeah. Right. Like over one hundred was a number to hit. I remember I was on Facebook and like so and it was like midnight when it was my birthday and I had like thirteen like right as midnight turn.
And I was like holy fuck. Like I'm in good standing. I'm so it's going to be a good day. Like I think, I think I'll make a pass like my sixty markets.
What I'm trying to beat from last year, like when I posted in the video, does good in the first hour.
And then I have to ask, I asked my friends like my my like my close friends like Alex and like John to, to comment on my to put something on my birthday wall because I wanted to add to the amount of people because like then Facebook replied notification like it was, um, Miranda Jacobson and 45 others wished happy birthday.
But then you would also like measure the status of, like, how good friends you are with someone in the public. A person by what? Your birthday. Happy birthday was. Was it like a sentence? Yeah, it was. It was just happy birthday, smiley face. You're like you don't really know them, but like I would always put so much effort into my birthday is on Facebook is. They want to prove that I was like really good friends with these people.
Oh, my God, I love you so much. At that time we did it like. Right. Like you're the best person in the world and like, go on and on and on. So glad I'm on Facebook. At the time, it was fucking lit. David dies right now. What do we all do? You know, I thought about this yesterday. Go look for a new job.
You're trying to kill me.
It's just been a weird week. And I was like, what happens? Like what we do and what's the order like?
Well, you can't post like who becomes David know like, no, what do we do? We come here to this house and we're like, oh, we all have a job.
That is interesting. Hey, you out of a job?
I just fucking mutilate. What the fuck do I do now?
Yeah, that would be weird. Like what happens then. Yeah. But is the business dead or does Natalie take over and start posting as me. Like actually what happened. What do you want, what do you want to tell us right now if I die. Yeah. I don't really see how the business would continue. It would be it. It looks like we'll just you know, there has to be funny.
You guys are all reading my will and it's like Illia is like rubbing his hands, like getting ready to receive most of the Marmie Nathalie's like there. She's like, OK, I know a lot's coming to me.
And then it goes on all the and all the proceedings from David Kalsi will go to Taylor, Stuart Taylor, everyone.
Look, everyone turns around to look at Taylor in the back of the room, like watching a dish. She's washing the dishes and she's just like, wow, that's really funny.
The first thing I thought of when you said that, like, what if you died? I was like, the money goes, Tahlia. That's like the that is that is my code right now.
What would you do if I died and you came to work and now he's like, hey, David's dad. I just walked in in the room.
Well, God, you would probably think that I did it for this badly. Hello. I think I'd like to give it a try. Thank you.
So well, I go looking for you because just to make sure you didn't run away. So, no, I'm dead in the room.
Oh, I'm not like the immediate like what do you do with his body? It's like, what are our next steps? What are we doing next?
We'll figure out the will now. Not like that. Like like as a person. You don't come in here either. He's dead.
What's the wall like. What are we with the person. Yeah.
I don't know. Go to therapy after seeing a dead body. Do you. Do you cry. Yeah. Hello. You would cry obviously if I died. I don't cry. We would be all depressed.
I think I would eventually cry. I don't think that would be the first your second shot.
I think when Todd stops coming around as much because he actually liked you more than I know, I don't think I would cry either.
First, because I experienced similar situations and I literally I think you I would be frozen and not cry until like three hours.
Oh, man. I wish I could just fucking be dead tonight, but I've never seen a dead body. I had people die and virtually seen their dead body. I would I saw my dead body would be super weird. Yeah. Oh my God. My dead body. What I feel could be the weirdest out of all your dead bodies, you know. I think so.
To me, I'm already dead. Yeah. Like, if you saw me be dead to be like I wake up Jason, you actually look you showered, I think I mean, I would immediately cry.
But that's just I agree that people react differently. I would react like that. But I saw that like my when my grandfather died, I was like, fuck an open casket. Yeah, that's crazy. It's so fucking weird. And it was like it was so weird.
But the thing my I dare you right now, if I die and it's an open casket, I dare you to make out with me.
So, you know, I just do it, OK, I'm down. I to tell everybody that I said that I was OK, I guess I don't know if that's how that would.
Guys, this is OK when I'm about to do to the to the body, I'm going to put my tongue in David's mouth. I know it sounds weird. You have to say it fast to before some people serving. Yeah. I have to say, sit in the back seat today. Love is so episode 240 for Jason.
If David does die like, well, me, Natalie and David assistance. Oh fuck.
Yeah, that'll be so great that you just signed me up for something that I did not want to do. I have to have a better question.
What would you do if one of us dies? I mean, zipper recruiter has actually which leads me to my new ad.
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I think I'd react differently for everybody. OK, if Naledi Friskies Natalie, I guess I would be ecstatic.
Thrilled. I think he would be. So I'd start. No, Natalie, I'd be really bummed now to be the dumbest, obviously. But I'm saying, what would you do?
Like you just asked us the question about the bombings, the bombings.
Well, what I do, I like I feel like you wouldn't know what I call life. I'd call everybody.
So now we got right. Yeah. Call me right now. I'd be like, hey, what's up? You knowing me? I'd probably be like, Jason, guess who died.
Regis Philbin to work somewhat closer to me. I don't know. You're fucking hilarious right next to me. Ilya Madeleines, Natalee's dad. Yeah, that's really that. No, I don't know.
I actually don't know how I would react if any of you guys died. I'd be pretty sad. I mean, I would hope you'd be sad, but I'm more just like, well, you can like I generally feel like if Natalee especially where to die, that you wouldn't actually know what is going on in your life if Natalee would wake up and be like. What's going on, you're like, where am I?
I mean, if my died, Natalie, that would probably take a big break from, like, posting things two days later and don't do me a favor and said it's so nice. Natalie passed away. So we're doing 30 percent off all murder. This is what she would have wanted. You have. All right. Natalie, all collection. In addition, it's embroidered. We have Natalie's name embroidered in the RFP, but it's like a bedazzled bubley letters.
It's really nice.
She's in the Ford Bronco here. It's beautiful auctioning it off. Yeah.
What would you do with the money if you're in charge of the will? What do you do with it? I think that that David would hand it off to me, knowing that like knowing that like I would do something responsible with it and think that's it.
I already just for fun, just tell everybody who is responsible you're the worst with money.
I think that he'd give it to you not because you'd be responsible with it, because you would do like the most fun thing with you, because it off of yourself when I would give it all to your parents, you know, I wouldn't even think twice.
I just gave it all to you. Really? Yeah.
I feel like if I die, my will would say, like Illia, here's all my money. But you have 24 hours to spend it, make sure you record it. Like that'd be really fun.
Like if you have that's a lot. But you get a house, a fucking yacht, a villa in Italy, Italy.
I don't know if I get three hundred million dollars, but I guess that's all the time. We have today's podcast. Thank you guys for listening. Jay, thank you for being the co-host today. Thanks for having me to have you back next week. You fucking killed it this week. Thanks, brother.
I will see you guys later. Go check out the new perfume, your goddess's mirch. And my name is Chef, I guess.