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Oh no planet to the sun. So in my brain it's earth. But that's not right.
You ready? Yeah, let's go. What's up, guys? Welcome back to Wild Till Nine. I am your host boyfriend and I am co-host.
Boyfriend's girlfriend. That's right. Boyfriend's girlfriend. You know, I saw not one, but two comments today.
Yeah, because Parker came out on Wild Wednesday. Wild. Yeah. I fucking love wild ones. I wanted to stay wild wild online Wednesday. Sounds real me. I went wild Wednesday to stay. You know what happened. And I was trying to think back to like why we didn't why we didn't have an alliteration. Because that just sounds so good is because we posted the first podcast on my birthday which just happened to fall on a Tuesday and we're like Juicy, feels good.
And then we stuck with it. My favorite thing is when talent. Picks it like a day that's only special to them to drop something, and it's like the most just self, well, it's my birthday, so I'm going to do it that day. And it's like no one else in the world cares. But, like, that's today. And that's just how I got settled.
If no one cares, though, like, you might as well make make a fun thing that, like, everyone gets to participate in. Totally good.
I feel a little bit of shade coming from you in my direction. Shade for me.
Are you only literally spit shade so you know nothing's new. Anyways, welcome back to the pod. Welcome back y'all. We have a motherfucking episode today. You know what we have? What do we have? New furniture.
Oh my God. Our little cube blue couches. Oh my God. They're so cute couches. Yeah, that. You know what? There's no way that you can look at a couch this small and adorable and not call it a couch.
It's more like a love seat. It's a couch. Like we can never have more than two people here. Yeah, sure. I couch it, if you will. I love saying it's a couch. Guys, we alluded to this a couple of weeks ago, but today begins the new chapter. Well, tonight, some might call critics are calling it wild tonight in season point five. Point, wouldn't it be one point five, that is that's correct, it would be right.
So stupid. Critics are calling it. I don't know why they're calling it points, but the good critics are calling a one point.
And Roper, The Times, Rolling Stone. Rolling Stone, wired. Wired. Yeah, BuzzFeed are calling it J14, very junior. And what that means is we kind of almost a little bit got our shit together. Right, in the form of just. Mahshid, basically just new couches, new couches, yes, in preparation for some new guests. Yes.
Oh, I'm so glad you took that opportunity as a guest not to be confused with testees, which are testicle before we happen to the meat and potatoes.
Any updates you want to give on the week?
Literally, this week has been such a blur. I feel like we've both been working like 12 hour days and I don't know what's going on. It's been a bitch. It's been a bitch. But things I'm not going to complain about having a job and having food. Having a good boy. Bubbies. Mm hmm.
All the great sex we've been having, all the jury has had in past podcast, when he gets stressed his work, the first thing to go is his sex drive.
I'm going to go ahead and just make that a two way highway. It has been a two way highway this time. To be fair, though, we haven't had any bad sex.
Oh, but. Oh, wait, oh, wait, wait. When this podcast comes out. Valentine's Day will have passed totally. And we're going to do this. We're going to do we're going to we're going to on Valentine's Day. Yeah, we are. But we're going to do. Is that is it. Yeah. Harder than it's ever been done before. Let's not get carried away.
Stock drop, roll rate, zip code.
I think I hated that. Yeah, I hate that. Stop, stop. Yeah. No, no, no, no. This is not some Asamoah shit. No, no, no, no, no. Stop, stop, stop. OK, read the board. Subscribe if you're not already hit the notification bell and my producer Jeremy, what do you got for us today.
So I'm first up, I got to be honest, I have a fucking fire idea. It's the best. Honestly, I have the best episode idea.
I just want everyone to kind of clock in here about the the sales real quick, the sales, the liquid shit that's coming out of his mouth right now. Here's what's going to happen next. You're going to say I have the best podcast that are the best one I've ever come up with. But it's not this week. This one's good, but in two weeks from now is better. All right. Guys, I got the best of the podcast today because we're giving away money.
I love Money podcast. So here's the deal.
We are going back and forth on the creative side, right? Right. And I do have a Bangar fucking idea that will be the best episode of this podcast.
You know, I feel like I've been making creative videos for so long that I actually. Oh, my God, smashing money into microphones. OK, I feel like I've creatively drained myself just over and over again, just being on YouTube. I feel like your podcast ideas are hot fire because you're not jaded by just like the shit show that is being a YouTube or for nine years, you don't even like your fresh you've got ideas, you're excited, you got fresh eyes.
Yeah. You just haven't been you been beat down for nine years.
And I feel like I feel like that that gives you the really good ideas. I don't disagree with that. Yeah, I I feel like working in my line of work, selling into, like creative companies from a boring perspective, I'm constantly like, that's the best idea you came up with. If I was in charge, I do like I think to myself, like, well, that's not the way I would do it or like that's not the way I would bring that forward.
But OK, that's fine. And I feel like I get to go where I'm going to, but I want to do now and we're doing it.
I'm a YouTube and we're giving away money, Mr. Beast style.
Except for like I'd like to ask if I wanted you to call me out on the YouTube thing. And you you let me just stew.
So sorry. I just want you to know that, like, I don't want to do to YouTube or so I need. Yeah, yeah. That. Yeah, yeah. Sorry. OK, so say it one more time to me. I'm a YouTube. No, no, you're not. I down, you are not a YouTube. You will never be a YouTube bot. You are not a YouTube or you're I mean, you're kind of YouTube.
You kind of you to do you want do you do or not? I don't know. I don't know. I just you. Yeah, you know what I want? I want the option to that. I never take. Well, no.
You want to be a broadcaster with a video component. How about that? I want to be retired on my yacht. Right. You want that? Yes. I think a podcast is going to get me here.
I don't know about that. That might not be the right. The right. Why don't we fuck it?
Two things. One, today. Best episode yet. No, no questions. Why? Because people are making money, not us. But you guys are one. Do the podcast. I have idea the oh God. The podcast idea that I have for two weeks from now about to be the most hottest on fucking fire.
Did I not call that? Did I not call that? But like today's episode is the best episode yet. Right. But then two weeks from now will be the next best thing. Yeah, but with the next best one will be to actually the one that's going to take the first place. One and two weeks from that. Four weeks from now. That will be the new best one.
OK, so me and all my ideas say, fuck you, but OK, it's not a competition, it's a fucking competition and some other things.
Anyway, a couple of things. Before I happened to money, things if there are personalities, people, professionals, interesting individuals that are gifted in the art of tarot cards.
Oh, reading the beyond do all sorts of things. And I want to preface with the fact that I do think it's all. Major horseshit, no, throw it out there. Oh, I don't I'm in no, I know. Yeah, but that's why it's even funnier that I'm the one that's choosing to do all right in two weeks from now. The spiritual, the supernatural. So it's not like there's anybody out there. Please tag them. Please flag them to me so that I can get in touch with them.
I actually watched Tiny Mitgang do some kind of virtual tarot card reader that that might be the way I anyway.
Right. That's the goal. If there's anyone out there that I need to look into, please like them for me. I want to watch.
OK, great. So, you know, just jump in. I just feel I feel as if there's a lot of pressure on me to let people win money today. Not yet, but I'm about to put the pressure on you. Right. OK, OK. So no pressure at all. The way today is going to work is this. I decided that we need to give back. Uh, and there's no better way to do that than just giving out free money.
Right. You're not doing it. I really I although I'll go walk through, like, the idea of how we're going to disperse that money in a day. All you got to do is just like watch this fucking video. Right. Uh. The caveat there is I went to the bank today and I went to the ATM and let me pull out two grand, OK? And so I want to give away two thousand dollars, OK? The problem is.
Lauren is the barrier to that. And so we are just all in big trouble. So I am prepared to give out two grand. OK, OK. I'm going to ask you 20, are you smarter than a fifth grade questions? I don't know of anyone spent any time watching the show. Are you smarter than a fifth grader? I those questions are hard.
Hard. I specifically picture questions in hopes of giving away all 2000. Right, right. Right, right, right. Because this is going to work by the rules. So every single time Lorne gets a question that I picked out. Correct, I'm going to hand this hundred dollar bill. Mm hmm.
And we're going about somebody. Every time she doesn't get one of those questions right, I'm going to put this over here. And I'm going to spend that money up to you. This is no, it's not up to me. What do you mean it's up to me? If it was up to me, I would just give all the money away. This is up to the lack of knowledge that my brain does not have.
If it then what are we going to fill in our time with the entertainment of me not knowing any of the questions that a fifth grader should know. But I have faith in you.
And I think the questions that I believe that you can answer, as long as there's no American like American history, is not one of the topics.
Right. Because I really know nothing there. OK, zero zero.
So here's how it's going to go if if anyone below. And if you don't need one hundred dollars, don't feel like don't feel like you have to participate by any means. But if you're interested, we're just going to go at the end of the podcast for the 24 hours after we first released this thing, we're going to find somebody who put in the comments just high and their Instagram or Twitter. Let us know which handle this is. Reach out to you.
We'll keep you our box.
That's it. That's all this super random. There's not any way you can increase your chances. Please don't spam the shit out of it. That's annoying, but you never know what will hit you then. OK, so good. So good. I missed all of it. I was feeling baby it was it on my sweater. I need some big wave.
I lost half my lip gloss. My Baber's. They all make it up to everybody by answering this question. Correct. God damn please. It's pretty easy. At least an absolutely. Oh nervous guys. I'm so in advance. In advance. I just want to say that I barely read any books. I don't do anything except for go on, take talk easy. OK, you have all the tools in your toolbar to answer this question correctly and no one will judge you everyday.
Guys, I already make myself look stupid by means of Segou Heimlich remover. Oh, you're about to prove twenty. Times in a row, how smart I am, just how sharp your lawn born, I'm bad at trivia. Oh God, I need to to lower their expectations. Are you better than a fifth grade? No, I'm not. I think six people are getting a hundred dollars to six. Yeah, 18. Jesus Christ. You have way too much faith.
So first hundred dollars, OK. This could go towards, you know, someone's bill I know, shut up, shut up. Too much pressure. Too much pressure. OK, so this one I'm thinking I hope a teacher gets this one, OK?
Or a stay at home mom who wants to buy some did not hear me. Give me the fucking question. I'm going to murder you. I'm going to murder. I'm going to I'm. I'm going to murder you on a murder. Murder you. I'm going to murder you. I'm going to murder you. Going to murder you.
Go, go, go. Lauren, yeah. You have four coins. Oh, my God. OK, here we go. Got four coins I hate. This is like the train question, like how fast is that? They add up to twenty five cents.
OK. Three of those coins must be what denomination I have for coin. Three of them are the same. And they have to add up. All right, one more time for coins. The equal. Twenty five cents. Twenty five cents, three of them must be the same coin. Oh, what coin is that? And for international apologies, this is US coins, so the three coins are the same, what is the coin? That is the the repeat three times.
That's right. And only one answer. A nickel. Thank fucking God, thank fucking God, I was like, is this a trick question? Oh, my God. For questioning God, teachers are getting paid less than pay. Just getting four bucks. Oh, Lauren. Yeah, I hate that when you're studying discussions of. Go ahead. Go ahead. Yeah.
I want this one to be a front line worker. Fuck you. I get fucked. OK, I get it. A nice meal.
Good a pair of shoes. I hate you. Ask the question.
It's going to be front line work right here, ok. Who invented the light bulb? Thomas Edison, I barely knew that I barely knew, like when I tell you that, like, I probably learned that through Arthur or something. Fifteen years ago, however, you fucking learned it, OK?
No matter. Oh, you do. Oh, my God. OK, you ready? Yeah. Oh, sorry. No, stop name, stop labeling, stop blaming, stop petting them, you look like that. This is for the single dad. OK. OK, three kids, single dad.
I stop making these fucking scenarios. What I will I will quit this podcast right now. If you stop this then. Don't even get don't even get me into the. I will I will quit this podcast and give people two thousand dollars of my own money if you don't stop putting scenarios on this.
I've never given away money before the Internet. This is fine. Let me do this. You believe that part alone? OK, ready. What is the longest river in the world? The Jesus Christ. The longest river. Is it the lazy river, a wet, wet and wild kingdom? That's close, close, that's not it, OK? Oh, I don't know many rivers. OK, so we've got the Mississippi is a river, right?
Am I. I say seismicity, by the way. I guess Spellman's is that we can be the question. No.
OK, so the Mississippi River people at home are screaming their answers at me right now.
And I'm pretty sure the Mississippi River is the largest river in the United States. OK, but we said world. OK, OK.
The Hudson Bay River, that's definitely not the biggest one that's in Canada.
They just Hudson Bay. OK, yeah. But I think there's a river that goes into it like there's got to be some lakes. It's a bay.
You watch Skully when he landed in the Hudson. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. OK, the West Nile. That's a river, right. Uh huh. The answer to the question was not name as many rivers as you know.
I thought that that's about all we have is three rivers. Um, OK. OK, you know what, this this gives me a nostalgic moment of hatred towards is when the ice baths challenges were popular on YouTube and you had to answer questions like these to get out of the ice bath. And so, like, not only do I not know the answers to these when I'm sitting clothed in, like, the comfort of our own home, but you really don't know the answer when you're sitting in a bathtub full of ice, I swear.
OK, OK, let's think about this. Let's think about. Let's think about this. I don't fucking know. I really don't know WAFL. What is it what's the answer? Amazon. Oh, I that was that's not in my in my brain, like that's never been in my brain world. Amazon. Amazon River. Huh. OK, OK. Is Jeff Bezos on that one?
He probably does. Right. To be the biggest one. Not even the CEO after next quarter. That's right. You're right. Well that's stuff that's going to be your money ready? Yep. What is the closest oh, no planet to the sun. Oh, my God. Fuck. OK, OK, OK. Let's think about this. Let's think about this. The problem is, is that. What I thought this is going to be layout that I'm just I don't think this could be a challenge.
So in my brain, it's Earth, but that's not right. I don't know, because it's not a good joke.
OK, OK, so there's Saturn. There's Neptune. Uranus is really far. I feel like Uranus and Neptune are really, really far. Saturn could be one of them. Jupiter and Mars are kind of like the three that I'm toying with right now. OK, but I feel like it's not Mars because Mars is basically like habitable.
Right? You I would say so.
Elon would say so. So I feel like it can be Mars. But I just feel like it's not slattern, OK, what was my other opinion, Jupiter? I really do. OK, OK, OK, OK, OK. Like I in my head, I can I can see and out of focus, like astronomy graph, you know, when they've got all the little things the sun is so big in the earth is so small.
I see it more like there's the there are strings and they're kind of right. And they're like the mobiling science fair.
Yeah. I fucking cross'. OK, let's go.
Because my project was any good, because I sold whatever it is that the bullshit that I made.
Right. Right, right, right. I crushed, I crushed those fears because my project was pretty right. Yeah. We were a great team. Oh man. We would've been fantastic.
Yeah. We've been great team are a good team. We are. I'm gonna say Saturn. SAT on it. Oh, God, what is it? Mercury. Oh, that was not in my brain either. That was that's never been in my brain. Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune and Pluto's now planet again.
You know, poor Pluto. He got kicked out of the planet. Yeah. Just for Pluto. Now, use a plenty and thank God for Pluto.
I wish someone would get justice. Justice for the person that could.
Yeah, that's a hundred.
You know, I blame the community education system and my lack of memory.
You know what? I wonder if you guys have a different planet closest to the sun in Canada.
It's Saturn. Got it. OK, are you ready? Uh, OK. Yeah. And if you could please let us know if the handle is Twitter or Instagram, that would be helpful. Oh, right. So we can actually do this.
Part of the question with you. And I was like, ah, no, no, no.
You ready? OK. Oh, this is this is a fucking layup. You keep saying no is not a layup there not a layup, OK? Yeah. What is the process? Oh, my God, by which plants eat and make energy photosynthesis? Take your money. Yes, take your money. Yes, let's fucking go photosynthesis. That's going to shelbie the horse.
I was going through the comments this morning on our last podcast, and there was the one I was like, this is if you show me you were like, damn, I feel attacked outside of shelbie, shout out Latvia.
Yeah, we got a lot of things I like. You joked about being the number one podcast in Latvia.
We only joked we are the number one podcast in Latvia. Yeah. No one show in Latvia done.
And in podcast number one show.
Oh my God. I keep dumping what's going on. I think I need a straw. That's OK. I'm having lipstick problem. What's happening next.
Next question. Let's get ready. Whoo! Three, two. I'm winning.
OK, now this is technically a little bit of US history. It's more. It's more. It's more world. But I talked about this story this week.
That means nothing to me. You were there from home.
Did the United States. By the Louisiana Purchase. What do you mean, what, the Louisiana Purchase. OK, who do they buy from? What do you mean, like, is it a country? It could be a country or a person. Um. Some. The U.K..
We talked about this, remember, I was like, why we got the Midwest, I know, but I wasn't listening to what happened in the polls in France know it was in France and we got to France and also that's to the U.K. We never paid for it.
We bought it, never paid. I feel like that one doesn't count, that's dumb U.S. history. That's world history anyway. That is the most American thing that you've ever said.
We didn't buy it from another. We bought it from another country.
I know. I know. But just. All right, Lauren, I'm willing. This is a two parter. OK, if you get the first part, you get it first one. Right. OK, you get the second part of this.
OK, I'll give you back one hundred, huh. OK, you can I can win.
I can win. So this is two questions in the third grade teacher who's got some extra student loans of.
Stop this person right here. Stop. Ready? Mm hmm. Which country is largest in size?
Oh, my fucking God, which country and bonus points, if you can get no to Russia, Russia number one or two one. Yes, you do, yes. OK, number two, you don't get it, not a big deal. I feel good about this. I already won. Already won. So it's just bonus. I'm. I could feel it really could, I can't. OK, next biggest country by land, by the land, by land.
Uh. Uh. The United States. Canada. Oh, fuck, I was going to say Canada, we've got all that shit up at the top that, like, makes extra, I actually get to pull this shit up at the top, you know?
No, no, no, no, no. Like where we're like the North Pole, like those little like Santa, I guess, into Santa Anas elves and all the polar bears and stuff and the ice caps. OK, I think it's for being Canadian.
I should get the hundred dollars for being Canadian. I should take a hundred hours not knowing that. OK, ready. Redi. OK, it's a bit of a trick question. Oh, OK, how long does Earth take to revolve around the Sun?
I have no fucking idea. Have to guess, I don't know, one Sarah McLaughlin song, no survey says that's close.
OK, OK. How long does Earth take? To go around the sun. How long is earth to go round the sun? Yes, all the way around, yeah. Once, once. Revolve, not rotate, revolves. Like, so if this is the sun like around, yes, yes, yes. I have no idea. Yes, you do. 365 days a year, yes. Oh, God, if you're OK, you know, it's doing the opposite, like, OK there.
I feel like there's like a summer solstice situation. I'm like, does that come into play? Like, you know, really daylight savings? You know, that's more about like giving farmers more daylight. But I was like, maybe that's like something. I don't know. There's lots of things going on in my head and I'm just happy that I want to. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I earned this with my big brain.
Everyone at home was like, oh, no. Oh no. I think I hate this.
So this is not our most fire ever. So this is the worst episode you're contribute. You're giving back. Yeah, but it's making me look one way you're killing it. Oh, Lauren. Priority. Yeah. OK, this this one might not be as much of a up that none of these have been layups, these have definitely been lapse. What are the three states of matter? OK, here's the issue is that I took science in French so I couldn't tell you them, if you give it to me, give it to me in French.
Oh, OK. Gas, liquid, solid. Done. Let's fucking go next. Let's fucking go. OK, Mr. Holman's shout out to you again.
This time it's a hexagon. As how many sides.
Hexagon. Hexagon. OK, octagon has eight. Hexagon, I think it's six. I think a Pentagon is five. Hexagon, hexagon, six sites. Yes, ma'am, is it Pentagon that has five, right? That's right, on the seven and not again, that has nine. I mean, those ones make sense. Square triangle. Oh, OK. What am I what am I on?
One, two, three, four, five, six. Oh, my God. I officially beat my feet by my estimate for myself.
OK, so this one I didn't know. OK, well how the fuck am I going to know it then. If you don't know it's not my brain. Well you'll, you'll, you'll know why I think you might know. OK, Greg. I think with now. OK, well, my dad, my dad and I have very differing, like knowledge bases. OK, well, justice for Greg. You ready? OK. The first hockey pucks used an early outdoor.
Oh, my God, made of what? Fuckin like Beavertail, I don't know. OK, hang on, let me think about this. It was not Beavertail, but it will just assume that that was yeah that was that was not a real a real guess. You know what, I probably have known this at some point. See, see, I didn't know this, but I was like, oh, OK, great, well, you give me a hint.
If it's something synthetic or something natural, it's natural. It's natural. OK, that's what I was going to say. You know what?
I'm going to go as far to say. I'm going to tell you. It's shit, it's frozen shit, but what animals frozen shit. But it's frozen, surely frozen or done.
OK. Cow dung waterbus done. You know what, I think you gave that to me. Still take this money, but I've only ever heard dung referred to when it's with cows because the Canadians think that they can trust me. I'm taking it. There's no getting back here.
But like the Canadian me was thinking like moose poo and like mousses. Moose, me, moose are not as concerned. Maybe deer because there's deer all over, maybe beaver poop, maybe squirrel poop. I take a lot of squirrels who thought to make a buck.
You guys noticed that Lauren's fidgeting with her fingers. That's how nervous she is right now.
This is people's lives on the line over here. Just this people's livelihoods. Mr Beazley also gives away like two million dollars. No, no. I was on Cleophas last night to give away ten thousand dollars to someone in the room. And it was just like. Just like that. Just like that. Yeah, that must be nice. Must be nice. You know, his poor accountant. All right. Like is that is it a write off?
I don't know. Who knows. This year I'm refocusing on what it means to take care of myself and it couldn't be easier than with daily harvest. They've been one thing that makes me feel better about my day and myself. I literally have daily harvest for every meal with their options for smoothies, crisp flatbreads, roasted harvest bowls and soups. They have something for literally everyone. I really enjoy a smoothie post workout and knowing that I'm feeding my body with organic fruits and vegetables makes me feel so good.
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You know it's not fair the fact that Netflix hides thousands of shows from you based on your location and has the nerve to increase their prices on you. That's right. Starting at the end of the month, they're raising prices again. Now, you could just cancel your subscription in protest or you could be smart about it and make sure you're getting your money's worth by using Express VPN like I do.
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How many teeth to two things, uh, does an aardvark have doesn't.
Oh, my God, why the fuck would I know this? I don't even know how many teeth humans have fun fact. I have false teeth and I'm the average human.
I have one less.
How many teachers are vocab, huh? Can I Google a picture of an aardvark, no. I like I almost want to be like, do aardvarks have teeth? That's a good question, but I think I'm thinking of an anteater because I do ant eaters have teeth. I also don't know that either. You know, this this question I don't feel as embarrassed to not know because, you know, like, I did a science project on, like, the capybara, not the aardvark.
Right. Arthur had lots of teeth, though. So this is like really throwing me off. And so if I get this wrong, I just want to blame PBS for is the PBS and Canada Zoo. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I'm going to go with zero. Shut up right now, Aaberg don't have teeth zero two. They have no to their defense. What are they have many tiffins. What are they eat? I don't know. That's not part of the question.
Oh my God. We let me Google. Absolutely. I totally let me. I need to Google with the inside of an aardvark mouth looks like ared vark. No teeth, wow, they have such a long snout, you would never guess that they have no teeth. Oh my God, they're so cute.
Look how cute little aardvark is, because like most me, he's got mustaches. Wow, wow. No.
To feel like Moose has great teeth. Great on your own. But imagine how cute you are defeated. No TV ads, no to everything.
Oh, my God. Oh my God. OK, well, fuck, I feel good about that question. This next one. Statistics would say is the easiest one. OK, well, that means fucking nothing for my bro. It has a 50 50 chance. Oh, OK. True or false? Oh God. OK, OK.
And there's going to be somebody out there that's going to challenge this. I already know it. OK, fine. True or false? Can you sneeze in your sleep? Oh. Hmmm, I feel like because you can orgasm in your sleep, that, like, leads me to believe that you can sneeze in your sleep, especially because your eyes are closed.
What a challenge that to say that guys can orgasm anywhere any time. Right, anyhow.
Right. Right. Right. But you know how you can't sneeze your eyes open. Right. I just feel like that makes me lean towards can't sneeze in your sleep, but it'll be more interesting if you could sneezing because that's kind of fun.
Pretty sure that when you sneeze it projectiles at like ninety nine miles an hour. I have it in my head somewhere.
I think you can, I think you can squeeze in your sleep. No. Oh, fuck. David and I haven't gone one wrong in a while. That was she was getting cocky. Do you guys feel that?
You know what? You know what the thinking is that like is something tickles your nose. Does it just wake you up and then you sneeze or you just don't get nose tickling while you're asleep?
Hard to say. I'm sorry, but I think you just wake up, right? If something is if you sniffed like a spider or something and you need to sneeze it out. Right. OK. OK. You ready? Yeah. So I didn't fact check this one. I got to be honest. Oh, good. But the answer was too good, OK? Therefore, I just went with it, OK? And don't ruin it home. Actually, if it's wrong, just fine.
Ready. OK, what is the collective noun. For a group of unicorn's. Oh, my fucking God, what do you mean I say this, you know, God, that's adorable. Oh, OK. Yeah, I don't think this is fair and it's is a fair question. This is not common knowledge.
All I'm saying is that this was on the trivia for are you smarter than a fifth grader?
We don't learn this in fifth grade, can you not? We don't learn in grade five and we don't learn it in fifth grade. Do you want to take this question away? Yes. OK, yes. We got some extras, right? Yeah. Yeah, we do. I don't know the answer, but I want this question out a blessing. A blessing of unicorns. Uh. For some reason, I had the word gaggle in my head like a gaggle of unicorns, geese, what is I guess is that what many of gaggle of geese?
That's what in my head.
But I don't know the gaggle, OK? I feel good about taking that one out. I don't think once again. Of course. Yeah. OK, you ready? Yeah. Where was the fortune cookie invented? God country. City, the city, what the fuck, yeah, what the fuck, um, is it a city that I know the name of? Yeah, yeah. Big city, Beijing. San Francisco, what the fuck, yeah, that's fucked in it, you know what I was thinking?
I was like, I bet this is some random American ass shit right here.
Yeah, I would have never done that. I had no idea. You know what, though?
I would have I would have guessed. I mean, like New York City, though, I wouldn't have guessed. Right. All right.
I get that. OK, guys, I just want you to know that Jeremy is trying to bamboozle all of you out of money. So, like, that's one of those questions. And the unicorn won as well. You can think his ass for less money going out to our lawyer.
Wild. Why are good people of the pod? OK, social media question. OK, let's go. Who was the first Twitter user to reach 20 million followers? I don't know. I said so to me, what you get? OK, great, but this is this is like dumb dumb trivia. And also this is not something you learn in fifth grade. I just want to say just don't point that out if you. OK, just Twitter didn't exist when we were in fifth grade, so maybe you should hold back on whether or not they learn this or not.
I didn't learn this in fifth grade. This is officially history now.
Oh, my God. I would like to take this question out. I didn't learn in fifth grade. I'm going to let it go. Oh, what the fuck, that's so random like it's just it's too it's too vague. It's too like like crazy celebrities like Iran. Is it a company?
OK, you ready? This is this is science at its finest. OK. Does shoe size correlate with penis size? No, on a box. Let's go, let's go. I mean, I feel like that's the biggest myth in the entire world, that everyone loves to be like, um, like big shoes, big hands, big socks, big win win, big win, win, win.
And because I feel like when girls do like massive hands, they're like, oh, shit. And then you can have like a little micro weed. You would never know it's true. And vice versa. And vice versa. Yeah. You never know. OK, you ready. Have we talked about Ninja Boobs on the podcast. I think we have literally have a podcast titled Ninja.
I think one of our first ones. It's got to be the first like we like four, seven or so. Yeah. Ninja Boobs. I feel like dicks are just Ninja Dicks at all times because you never know all of this happening. Yeah. Unless you, unless you're trying him, you know, you know exactly what they're doing. Jon Hamm just happened just Jon Hamm penis and or literally just Jon Hamm in sweatpants. Yeah. To not to like bring more attention to Graceland Ween.
But like, honestly, Jon Hamm doesn't even need sweatpants or grace or pants.
It's like maybe getting a little too. Anyway, go Jon Hamm. Next question. OK, this one you need to get correct. I hate when you put pressure on them and it just like it sets the expectations weird for everyone.
All right, ladies. Play along at home. Which of these objects best describes the shape of the clitoris? Oh, I know the answer. It's the eggplant. Is that one of the options we'll pretend like you didn't say that, OK? Button, wishbone, eraser. Oh, it's the it's the wishbone on hotbox box, it's the wishbone done. Yeah. Easy, easy. Eggplant. What eggplant.
Yeah. For some reason I saw it's more just like the shape of like, like the the tip of the eggplant is on the outside, but the rest of the eggplant is on the inside. Got it.
And for the guys out there, obviously it's a myth.
The quote doesn't exist at home.
We're like, oh, we spoon. What do you mean? This next one I need I need you to think about. OK, I don't don't answer quickly. OK, think about it, ok. Which is heavier, OK, a pound of bricks. Uh, or a pound of feathers. OK. That that's the question now the same. I want you to think about it, OK, before you answer. Which is heavier. Yeah, well, they're both a pound.
And answer, yeah, I'm so proud of you. I'm so proud of you, I feel that what you're getting people of, hey, let's fucking go.
What are we got now? One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, 10, 11, 12. OK, you ready? Twelve people. I know a hundred bucks is like a crazy amount, but like a go go.
I thought it'd be better to give 20 people. You know, I was so much. Well, well ok. Relax on twenty twelve people. Relax, relax. Calm it down real.
I was prepared to give twenty people Roy Roy Roy I it well ok.
Ready. How many legs is butterfly I have. So when I think about drawing a butterfly, I would give it six, OK, but. Uh. I'm trying to think of like, OK, it definitely has for. For sure, has for. Oh, God. But it could be one of those I don't think it has a I don't think it has. And how could like little mini ones, like little mini guys coming out of, like the the body?
How many does Butterfly have? The Pokémon, how many legs does Buttar Free have, huh? Oh. I'm going to go with six. Final answer, six, shut up right now, six, I want to I need a Google Picture button for you right now just to double check, if that's I don't want to say that I base my answer off button free, but I base my answer off button free to more questions.
Wait, hang on, hang on. We're talking about free.
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What's my biggest beer go moose deciding who doesn't want to cuddle anymore. Yeah, I mean, you're not wrong.
You're a little you're a little wrong. Like you're totally not wrong. OK, but like a little wrong.
OK, it's the dentist. Oh ok. I don't like that I it's definitely bad. I hate the dentist, I hate everything about it and I am definitely overdue. But I have some good news. I just started using my new barouche toothbrush and my teeth have never felt better. I know I'm getting such a good clean when I'm using it and I am confident that the dentist will notice too if I ever go.
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Definitely a plus cute color options and they have six different brushing techniques to choose from to make sure you were getting everything you need for a personalized experience just for you and random things to be proud about. And this is probably what adulthood feels like. But I am finally proud of the brushing that I'm doing with my teeth. And now that I have a brush, I cannot wait for the plus report card whenever I make it to the dentist.
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OK, so but if he has two big ass feet and two little hands so if he is not to scale and to take that up with Niantic. But if I was so cute. Well I was. Yeah but he has four forelimbs ok.
Lost, too. Oh, my God. OK, we're at 13, OK, you know what, that's all bad if I text you 50. OK, give us a bad. This one's hard, this one's hard. I know this, but I don't know why I knew it, OK? This is like a random tidbit. Oh, you ready? Uh. Who were the first television couple to be shown in bed together on prime time television?
God. Well, you tell me what year it was. I don't know. OK.
I mean, it would have been cartoon, a real cartoon. Good question. OK, ok. OK. Cartoon. Um, um. And this cartoon in America would have been on Cartoon Network, next question, OK? OK, we got let's see, we've got Betty Boop, does she have a man next to her, too?
That's cool. That's cool. OK, so like I was thinking like Popeye and that's too old.
That's too much shit. You know what? I'm not sure. Oh, my God. I think that's just. Just before. OK. OK, first couple on prime time. Humans are animals, humans, humans.
OK, so it's not lowland bugs. And just refresh my memory as to who they were, Lola and Bugs Bunny. Oh, got it. Oh, my God, you uncultured fuck.
Lord Bugs, I get it, you're cultured, I'm not OK, OK, human cartoon, OK, I'm like, did Arthur oh that?
They went about it on Cartoon Network. Oh my God. My cartoon. I can't even think of like humans on Cartoon Network at all.
OK, Family Guy. No, that'll be too late. They definitely a family guy, definitely is like later than that would have happened. We give me another clue. You mean, like, put me in the right direction? There's not much else to give you. Give me, give me, give me something. Give me something.
Took place in the Stone Ages. Oh, my God, Fred Flintstone and Velma. Oh, fuck that.
This could be the case, Fred. Oh, my God.
What is your name? Wilma. Wilma. Oh, my God. That's so close. Wilma and Velma.
There was another question that I almost asked, which was, what is Scooby Doo full name and Scooby Doo.
Shut up right now. Scooby Doo. No idea.
We call Moose like moose with all the time. Yeah. Oh, my God. So do I get that question? Yeah. Oh, yeah. OK, I'll take it. Last question. Fred and Wilma. Yeah. Well, my God.
I know I haven't seen I haven't seen Fred Flintstone in so long.
We should watch. Yeah. OK, last one. And I it's an important one.
And although I want you to know it is a little bit of American history, but this is the to about you know, this is important.
History is important history. Yeah. But like important to who. Black History Month. Oh ok. OK, important. I'm not you. OK, you didn't grow up the states. Yeah but this is important one. OK, ok. So. And it's OK, we don't know it. It really is. But it's an important one, everyone needs to know this, like every person listening to this, I don't care what country they live in, they need to know this.
OK, OK. What is Rosa Parks famous for? Oh, Rosa Parks was famous for, um. Oh, shit, hang on, OK, wait. Harriet Tubman was the Underground Railroad. Yes, Rosa Parks was famous for sitting in the white section of the bus. Going against the rules of segregation, right, and just like breaking the construct there, yes, most importantly, a white man got on the bus and basically said, that's my seat.
Right. Anything you need to go to the back. And she said she said no. Yeah, yeah. That box is famous for it.
Yes, yes. Come through, Rosa Parks. Well, we need to we need to have a black history here. Yeah. Yeah. No, that was great. I love that. I love that. Yeah. Because Harriet Tubman, the Underground Railroad, the Underground Railroad, went through Canada and went through St. Catherine's, my hometown. Interesting. Yeah, interesting. I was like, I think that they could teach this in Canada, but yeah.
No, we definitely we definitely are not in Canada. And also I would have learned that within like between K and eight at some point, like before my history went to French when I went to high school. Got it. Got it. Got it. At things, things get real blurry when things went to French.
I get that.
I would end up with I think 15 years, most of them I guess, and not three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15. Bitch only let five people down. That's not bad. That's a seventy five percent success rate. I'll take it you didn't want any people down here, given all twenty of it away. We're not going to you.
Don't you live town like literally I was about to be like can I pull five hundred dollars out of my own account to make up for the five that I five people? I don't know.
I look at the obviously and get away, you know how much less pressure my blood pressure would have been. Much lower than what many fun. My heart rate would have been lower than I would have been any fun. It was such a stress you killed that you know what I did better than I thought I was going to do? I told you I picked questions that were fair. Well, for the most part.
Well, the gaggle of unicorns that I don't know about. The blessing. The blessing. Yeah, I don't know that one. Love the Aardvark question also. That's a good fun fact. Love knowing that. Like love. That's like a good, like back pocket party trick.
Right. Right. Absolutely. And everyone should know the story of Rosa Parks.
Yeah, I agree with that 100 percent. So what are your next week?
Um, I'm bringing on not quite our first physical special guest because they can't be here in person.
Um, but I'm I'm bringing in I'm bringing in Mom DIY for a little for a little spice, a little spice to the podcast just and also just everyone knows my mom has listened to every single episode of this podcast so far. So if that gives you some context as to our relationship, there are no secrets within my mom and I relationship.
And I think also, too, like I wasn't a crazy bad kid growing up. So, like, I didn't I don't really have that much to hide. Like, I don't think she learned that much. Right.
Listening to the podcast, my mom would learn.
And as I listened to zero episode of the podcast, you're literally when I asked my mom when I started prepping her for, like, what the podcast will be next week, she was like, oh, that's so cool.
Is it going to be a part of it? And I was like, absolutely the fuck no. I'm like a sister. Bobbi listens. Oh, yeah, that's right. Yeah, yeah.
You bring on. Yeah, you're in. Good fun. Anyway, so Mom DIY has uh has some spice to add for next week and I'm so excited. I'm very excited as well. Yeah. Please don't misspell your handle into office. Televises Instagram or Twitter so we can find you. Right. This is not an end. This just we're going to pick them at random. It's chill, it's very chill. Randomizer of something. It will pick one.
We'll send it out to you. We'll figure out how to get the money. I want to do so many more of these. These are following, right?
We're finally less stress, less stress on my part. But love, love giving away money to people. Well, I went up the ante and I also want to involve people. But the problem is, just like the logistics of just like getting money out to people is kind of a pain sometimes. Right? It's like trying to figure out how to do that. But I would love to give away 20 grand. I love to give away two hundred thousand dollars.
So we will need twenty thousand more ad sponsors, brand deals to do that. Right. But every single person, something to aspire toward that didn't hit Skip on a podcast or, you know, if they were headed out for lunch, just let it play, let it play out a little bit.
You're going to be the one that helps us get to twenty thousand two hundred thousand dollars.
So we will hopped to the comments and let's do first 48 hours.
OK, go that way.
Yeah, because, yeah, people work and I feel too like I, I wait until I have like the right time in my day to listen to a podcast I don't want to miss out so well first. Forty eight hours when we release it from when we release it.
So if we release it on a Tuesday, if you go back to Wild Tuesdays we'll pick on Thursday.
Right. So yeah, we'll pick on Thursday. So your first 48 hours of comments count and then we'll have like a twenty four hour period window to get a response from someone, um, on Thursday when we contact winners.
Yeah. And so if you listen to Apple, Spotify, just go over to the YouTube, the links in there. Right. Right. Oh yeah. That's right. Yeah, yeah. If your audio only international is fine. Well yeah. Well I mean there's so many options.
There's PayPal and yellow because I want to go to venomously I think in the States. Right. We'll figure it out. Yeah, I'll figure it out. I'm so excited that we get to the point where we can actually start not investing back into things but back into the audience that helped us get here in new couches and new couches and some fucking cool ass guests in. Thank you to the number one show in Latvia. I love that. Well, tonight, we'll see you next week, buddy.