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Welcome, welcome, welcome to armchair expert I'm Dan Shepherd. I'm joined by Monica Monsoon. What's on the horizon forecast wise?


Oh, sunny skies, sunny skies, smooth sailing.


We had a ding, ding, ding about sailing.


This is the third time we've talked about sailing in the last 24 hours, which is three more times.


And we've talked about it in the last decade. Should also be noted, if anyone's watched the Netflix admissions scandal documentary, we learn of the Stanford sailing coach.


And then Monica said he was sailing team.


I thought you you meant rowing, right? But you didn't. You were right in saying sailing. And then I started to think, like, that's a thing.


That's a team. And then it became, is it in the Olympics?


And I said, I kind of think it is.


And I was like, I don't know.


And then we interviewed someone today who had been in the Olympics and they said that they befriended a sailing competitor.


And we had a Major Dingle's major, major doing double Dingle's today.


We're going to talk with Rachel Bilson. Rachel Bilson, of course, came to great notoriety in The O.C. She was also the star of Heart of Dixie Jumper.


And she has a new podcast called Welcome to The O.C. Bitch. Is the delivery of that idea trying to take to.


Sure. Try to welcome to the O.C. bitches. I like you like. OK, well, you want to try one.


Welcome to The O.C. Bitches, and that's Stankonia. I think we're going to go with that one.


OK, listen, join the original O.C. Bitches, friends and co-stars Rachel Bilson and Melinda Clark for a trip back to the early 2000s.


Zip up your juicy couture tracksuit and grab a seat by the pool while they deliver the ultimate O.C. Rewash podcast. This was a ton of fun.


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He's in our chat. Where are you, Monica? I'm in Georgia. I'm home with the family. That's nice. It's so nice.


I haven't been here since twenty nineteen, which is rare. You're not next to that. Yes, I am. In a storage closet. Well, yeah. Why wouldn't you be. Exactly. I am at home.


I converted my closet into my office. So this is normally all shoes behind me. Oh man.


I wish it was still shoes.


I know I thought about it, but I'm like, is that a little excessive, obnoxious for people to just see how many it's a problem. Oh my God.


Actually, Nicole once was like when Rachel gets rid of her shoes, I'll give them to you.


Yes. Really? Yes. No one is a size five. Exactly.


She was like she is a small feet like you. And you're the only other person.


I'm definitely. You are who I'm going to come to you because no one, it's literally like, OK, children or not like that's what I'm going to do.


Yeah, that's what happened. What are you guys doing? Some of her. Amazing. Yeah. We both have little feet. Oh. From Sumant. I was telling Monica that this is usually full of shoes, my shelves behind me because I'm in my closet.


We're going to get into your incredible flair for fashion. But before we do, I guess my first question is, why are you coming for us? Why are you taking aim at us? You're launching a podcast to compete with us. We're friends.


You are going to bring the full brunt of the O.C. We don't have shit. We don't have an IP to help us. And I just want to know why. Why are you doing this to us?


Because, you know, I like to talk to you only the only people I like the most.


So full disclosure, we know each other in real life. Yes, we do. Somehow via Kristen, obviously. Yes. And maybe.


Oh, through Nicole. Maybe I introduced Kristen to Nicole. Right. So this is a lovely story. So you meet Nicole Chávez on The O.C. She is a customer at the time. Yes. And she is now hands down the biggest designer and stylists in the world, licensing designer. She's the biggest stylist in the world.


Well, she is definitely made a name for herself because obviously she has impeccable taste. And when she was on those see, she's like, I want to try styling. So I was her first sort of whatever. I was the sample you were the laboratory was the laboratory.


And then Kristen, I was like, oh my God, I feel like we were like some InStyle Golden Globe party or something. I think I have a picture of it.


Hold on. Hold that. I think you're dressing it up. It was most certainly a CW event because you were both on TV.


I'm trying to make a fantasy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.


You guys are golden, you know, but you look at the outfits that we're both wearing, I think it was maybe the first thing Nicole dressed me in when I was like, Kristin, if you want to, I have this awesome friend is a stylist and that's how it all blossomed. Oh, wow.


That's very Amy Poehler of you to bring your friends up with you. Thank you. Yeah. I'm so self-centered. I would have met this other challenging person and I would have said, well, the last thing I want her to be looking at is cute unrecovered. So let's let's advise her to only wear Carhart's.


Hey, that's actually a pretty cool fashion statement itself.


Oh, you don't have to tell me girl. I have many a car. Hardly that I do not downtown. So we've come to know each other. We've been around each other at like social events and whatnot. Well one time in particular I remember which was at Josh Schwartz house. Yes. He has a beautiful house not far from both of our houses. Yes.


And he had some kind of shindig and I went as Christians plus one. And you were there also. Your mom was there. I met Janice. Yeah, Janice was there. So Janice is a smoke show. Oh, my God. She's going to be so thrilled. She's so hot. He's a good no, she's a good piece, I got to say.


Then I learn in fast order. This scale is not just a sex therapist, but she is a tantric sex expert.


Oh, Lord. Well, she you know, she dabbles in that area, I'll say.


Oh, I she does. I have rejected all information that she likes to share about her daughter.


I'm like, please. I mean, the night after I lost my virginity, I was very young and my mom sits me down.


I swear to God, she's also psychic and is like, let's have the sex talk now because you're you I'm like, oh my God, I'm like a teenager.


And I'm like, oh, no. I'm like sweating in every area possible.


But, you know, now looking at it like this is the movement, this is exactly what's been denied as women throughout the movement.


Clearly, yes.


OK, so we have this in common. My mom is so open about sex with me.


My father was insanely open about sex with me, but at least he was a dude and I didn't have to imagine him in the way that I have to imagine my mother. I mean, just recently, she's a widow now of two years she's got on the dating scene. Yeah.


She called me like a laded floating on a pink cloud because she had gotten plowed the night before and just and was really satisfied.


And she shared that. And I was so happy for her. But yeah, but she inevitably starts giving me, like, details, and I'm like, you know, I got it, man. This was a great experience. I'm good with that.


Let's just leave it there. That's really healthy, though. I think for parents to be able to speak to their kids about this, I think you really benefit and it's an open topic. So when you have to experience it yourself, at least you're safe. You kind of know what's going on and you can talk about it. I think it's huge.


Oh, I'm so into it now. I have two daughters, so I'm now in the camp of, like, my mom. So I'll probably try to have, like, open conversation and we'll probably mortify them maybe in a few years.


Well, we'll see. We'll see how it goes. We'll see what comes up at dinner. Hold your daughter's six. Yes. And she must have at this point has to use some sex questions and stuff.


So the other day in the car, she's like, mom, where do babies come from? And I was like, oh, fuck, she's sick. So you're like, I can't really talk about a penis entering a woman's vagina.


I mean, I could. But you're saying and that's probably horrifying.


And she's like, I know it's like a dad and a mom. And then I was like, contemplating do I go into, like, the science of it?


Like, you don't have to have a dad and a mom and like, you could be in a lab and it becomes just like elaborate scientific experiment and maybe that's the way to go.


So romantic.


Luckily, luckily, she got distracted by us talking about Pop Tarts or something.


So I got to, like, move on, just send her to her grandma. That's also a little concerning because I'm like, do I want her?


Like when they're doing a yoga move in kindergarten her to do like a tantric yoga move and then be like, what is that like at all that could also help get those chakras wide open?


Those are talked about very often.


Let's have your mom on. Well, I'd like to do it. She would love. Are you kidding?


If you think I've been inappropriate in this interview, wait till you hear I'm going to speak to your mother.


She will love it and be up for all of it.


Well, when I was talking to her in the backyard of that party, I was like, oh, I met my match. Like, this girl's not going to ever blush. I'll definitely take my foot off the gas before she does fully get into it.


No problem. Yes, it was thrilling.


OK, back to the kids really quick. Yes, Kristen has this great thing.


I don't know where she picked this up, but instead of even saying the man puts his penis in the vagina and then he sends his sperm up to the ovum, she says, which is is so cool, the woman puts the man's penis in her vagina.


I love that. So you're like starting with this notion that you're in charge. Yeah.


Yeah, I'm losing. I love that. It's really cool.


But you can't even get to the ejaculation part. And they're already like they're so bored with the word penis vagina. Those are scientific and then they're out.


Any story just make it really long so you don't ever have to get to the bottom of it. It's really the key to parenting. Now, I've actually brought this up on the show many times, Monica. You'll remember that I've said this every now and then we'll interview someone that has like some aspect that I would find very intimidating if I were single.


I'm trying to think, Monica, who we were just talking to some female guests.


And I said, like, are men afraid of you? Oh, Emily Morse. Oh, yeah. Sex therapist. Yes. And she said, yeah, yeah. Guys are a little nervous. So I remember telling you at that party, hey, just a pro tip. Don't ever tell anyone your mom's a tantric sex expert because whatever guy that hears that is going to panic. I mean, most guys are wrestling already with like, how long can they last or do you think?


And then you go, oh, my mom my mom told you you're supposed to claimer like I never listened or learned anything.


So you're good.


I pulled me aside and I was like, listen, just leave that part out.


When you're talking about mom, I do think that's why is advice. I do.


It's a lot. It's a lot. Hey, at least they're not having sex with her.


That's the real intimidating factor where a lot of boys, like when you were younger, kind of hot for your mom. It's a good question.


Oh, no, we lost. I'll be right back with my girlfriend in junior high, Randy Jamina.


Her mother was so beautiful and I would go over to Randy's house for our, like, daytime hangs that we were allowed to have in junior high. And I would spend the entire time in the kitchen talking to her mom about like appliances and stuff. I would talk to her about anything and I would like brush up on appliances. I knew she like that. Yeah.


I was so smitten with her. That is so cute. Did she ever know?


I hope so. Like I put it in all that effort.


OK, so I wish Monika was here for this. You're now a record setter on the podcast. Why you're ready for this? Yeah, I'm ready. Like we had Jason Ritter on. And Ritter, of course, famously is the son of John Ritter. So he was second generation. But come to find out, he actually was third generation because his grandfather was this like kind of country actor. Guy in his own right was quite popular. So it was like third generation.


And then reading about you today, I was like, oh, my God, you're fourth generation. We certainly never interviewed anyone that like four generations of showbusiness. Yeah, it's kind of crazy.


My great grandparents. Came to Hollywood, and my great grandfather was the head of the trailer department at RKO Pictures. So it goes pretty far back in.


Your great grandmother was a screenwriter. Yeah. Actually got things made. She wrote screenplays that couldn't have been popular back then. No, definitely not.


It was not a place for a woman, so to speak. So pretty big deal.


Yeah. And then your grandfather was a producer and director of Get Smart.


Yeah, he directed a lot of classics. He won his Emmy for Get Smart. But yeah, he did all those shows, you know, The Andy Griffith Show. He did a few Brady Bunch, Mary Tyler Moore. Just so I mean, that part's pretty neat.


How often would you see that, Granddad?


I saw him quite a bit growing up. You know, he still lives in Studio City where he's always lived and always still alive. Yeah, he's still still alive. He's ninety one, maybe.


Well, good for him. And you. OK, Monica, I'm going to bring you up to speed. I was just letting Rachel know that she is now the record holder on armchair expert as the person who's been the most generations in show business. So beating Jason Ritter, who has three generations, if you remember.




And Rachel is for her great grandmother, was a screenwriter and their great grandfather was a work for RKO. Her granddad directed Get Smart.


Oh, my God. All right. Now we're going to get to Dad. Dad wrote The Rocketeer.


That's right. You have done your homework, Fred.


That's incredible, Rachel. You're downplaying it. But it's almost impossible for any one generation to make a living in this business. And then for for growing up where anyone you would have looked above you was in this occupation.


So I kind of wonder, does that demystify it or does it heighten the need to succeed in it?


I think it definitely demystifies it. Like for me, it was going to my dad's work was going to set and my friends and I in sixth grade would go and hang out in the trailer, get our hair done, go.


Craft service obviously was the best thing ever as much candy as possible.


And that was my experience. It was just I'm just going to go to my dad's work and it's fun and it's cool and there's things about it. But it definitely was like just kind of how life was growing up. So get put into it. It wasn't like, oh my God, like this crazy world that you don't know what it's like or what to expect.


I was a little more comfortable.


That is so comforting to me as the dad of two daughters who yeah. I go to set and then I'm constantly like, are they getting more interested in tennis or less interested? And I do believe it's less interesting when you say Monica, they're not into it.


I mean, they're fine, but it's not exciting. Like you said, you know, like a bunch of the pod kids went to see a live taping of one of our other friend shows. And like a kid show.


Yeah, kid show. And Lincoln was just like she went. But you could tell she was just like it was normal to her. And for everyone else, they're like, this is so exciting.


Sure. Until Hours six of the experience and everyone was like, hate this.


Yeah. Just take a kid to like one taping of anything and they're like, I'm good. Yeah.


By the way, take anybody to his sat. It's my favorite thing to do is like have someone visit from Michigan who's so excited to come to a set. They are blown away for 11 minutes and then they're like, OK, yeah. Wow. So this is a boring fucking job, honey.


And most of the day you're just watching people light a scene right here right now. Not only were your parents in it, but also you were going to Notre Dame. Yes. So your peers are also like in it. Yeah.


Kirsten Dunst was there with me and she was already working, already kissed Brad Pitt and, you know.


Oh, yeah, we did. They canceled that movie. Yes. She was like eleven. Oh, no.


Oh, Brad Pitt wasn't. Yes. Brad Pitt with the vampires. Yes. Yes, it is. Tristin or something. Yeah. Hold on. Hold on. No, no, no, no, no, no. I thought the vampires name was Treston. Oh no.


That's the legends of the fall. I know. Don't ever fucking challenge me to a Brad Pitt.


Oh. Oh, but hold on, let's back up because I remember watching that movie and of course in the movie Kurstin Monaca is playing like one hundred year old vampire.


But she's a child. Yeah, right, right, right. In real life she's a child, Monica.


And he says then I don't remember this. She's definitely kissed Brad Pitt. Oh, we got to really get into this for a second. I mean, I feel like this is in a lot of interviews with her where she has to talk about how to kiss Brad Pitt.


Was it eleven? Oh, my God.


Wow. Also, that does not age great. No, no, that's not great right now. In twenty twenty one. Yeah, yeah.


A great look. It's not a great well we're not blaming Brad obviously.


Know this almost goes into this week's episode of Seventy Monica where it's like I my best friend Aaron when he was ten was in karate and he had to fight a girl, as was his opponent was a girl.


Oh, wow. So you got to like you got to respect her by your care.


It is a terrible setup, so, you know, what's Brads was to do here, this actor is you should be taken seriously. It's all a mess.


Oh, my God, you're right, though, because I watch that and say, oh, he's one hundred year old vampire.


You don't need to hear about it. Sure. Nothing to see here. Oh, totally normal. Just a run of the mill, 11 year old, 100 year old vampire kissing the sexiest man in the world.


OK. Have you been having this lately? Monica and I have been just swirling in it. Like almost everything we consume now is shining a light on how bonkers it was five seconds ago. So did you watch the Britney Spears doc?


No, but I've heard about it. How gnarly it is. You have to watch. I'm going to have I want to watch it. Well, first, they show a clip of Ed McMahon when she was on Star Search. What was she, Monica? Six, seven, eight, seven or something? Yeah.


And here's the conversation. Rachel, do you have a boyfriend? No. Why not? I don't like boys. They're mean. What about me? I'm not mean.


Can I be your boyfriend, this 70 year old grandpa? One day I probably would have said the same dumb thing in nineteen eighty.


Oh, well, everything has been so brought to light, so to speak. And you're just like holy shit. Like how do people get away with so much of that for so long.


I'm almost grateful I was present because like if I were born now and I want to be like they were crazy. Right.


But I was there and none of that stuff seemed weird. And then they keep showing clips of, like the late night talk show hosts who are making jokes at their expense.


But the jokes are I mean, they're so misogynistic and fucking evil or in interviews they're, you know, some 50 year old guys like, well, you know, Britney, I've got to ask, are your breasts real?


Oh, are you a virgin? What's so funny? Because this came up recently and I thought about all the things I watched as a kid. I was big into musicals. Right. And then I'm thinking back on some of these.


I don't know if you guys know this one. Seven Brides for seven brothers.


It's basically about seven brothers kidnapping women, causing an avalanche so no one can get to them. I'm trap them and they fall in love and they, like, get married at the end, you know what I mean? I'm like, that's why I have so many issues with men. I'm like, yeah, Stockholm Syndrome.


That's a play about Stockholm specifically.


And I'm like, is that what I was raised with? I'm like waiting for someone to just come and steal me, you know, and like. Yeah, yeah.


But it it's true because I know that's obviously way further back those musicals in those movies back then. But thinking about it now, it's pretty crazy.


Yeah. And again, this stuff that's in the Britney dock, I mean, you were active, you know, you were being interviewed. I'm sure if you went through Euphronios, it's like white noise.


But I guarantee if we got every clip of every interview, especially when you were like a sex symbol on The O.C. and you were young, I bet you got asked the craziest shit and have just forgotten there was no filter, no awareness.


So I'm sure there's just a bunch of shit out there that's incredibly inappropriate. I even did photo shoots that are incredibly inappropriate.


And just like if any woman at that time had been ahead of their time and had the wherewithal to be like, hey, this is kind of crazy for you to ask me that.


You're not asking him that. Right? Then they would be a bitch, right?


Yeah, ungrateful. Totally.


If you were a strong woman, you were like thought of as aggressive. Yeah, I remember the argument, Monica, because some women did do that and they said, oh, fuck you. You want to be a sex symbol and you want us to pay money for you to be sexy and all of a sudden you don't want to talk about being sexy. Fuck you like that was the attitude like you signed up for this. You want to be a sex symbol and this is what comes with it.


Right. But it didn't come with that for guys. It's I know. Yeah, it sure didn't.


If that was a true principle we all believed in, it would have been happening to Timberlake in every interview. Right. You got your dick way yet, you little pansy. Yeah. You know, that wasn't happening. How big is your dick? I got to ask. The women want to know how big is your dick? Hey, J.T., we love the new single. How long do you last in bed? Have you met Janice?


You will expect you to last forty years. Good luck with the user. The questions women really want to know. Yeah. Oh. Oh my God.


First of all, were we talking about. Oh, your school. Yeah. Oh right. Who I went to school with. Yes. Oh my God.


Yes. Kirsten kissy fucking wow. I'm still kind of spinning from that. I mean, I am jealous.


I don't want to be jealous. I know everyone is. Even though she's eleven, you're still jealous. You know, I know, guys, it's a complicated world is complicated. She's a victim and a victor.


Oh, man.


I would never let that happen to someone and I'd kill to have been her. OK, I want to ask you one salacious question, huh?


So another one of your classmates at Notre Dame was Romney Malik, and now he's a twin as well.


Your twin. OK, I need you to help me. Sure, first of all, I loved iRobot, so I have immense respect for his talent. Yeah, and then I met him. I think I met him. I met him at one of the Nazi party.


He actually was.


I know Efren who played Pedro in vote for Pedro. Oh, yes.


Yes, OK, yes. So Effron, he is an identical twin and the identical twin did cruise through Hollywood as everyone all the time. So it's really cool for the brother who doesn't have to go to work but can just be famous is awesome.


OK, so I like to do that. I mean, they do. Oh, they do. But there were enough differences to definitely tell them apart.


Now I'm a little disadvantage because I had never met them in real life. I'd only seen them on iRobot. So again, it probably was him, but it did cross my mind. Is this his brother?


OK, I'm just going to come right out with it. Yeah, it was one of the weirdest conversations I've ever had.


And I kept thinking the whole time, what is happening in this conversation? Is he a truly this unique or is he, B, is he building a mystique about himself? Right. Is he navigating the world with building this mystique? And I guess I was just wondering in high school, what kind of kid was he?


OK, I have a funny story for you. So Romy was a good friend of mine, like we were all.


Oh, he was. Yeah, we were the same crew. We did The Crucible together senior year. We were the lead in it together, like all these things. Right.


We kind of kept in contact a little bit. So obviously he gets super famous and he's always been extremely talented, a really amazing actor even in high school.


Yeah, he's a phenom. I mean, he really is. I mean. Yeah, yeah.


Super talented. I had posted a throwback of us from our senior trip to New York Broadway. We're super like nerdy, like just, you know, the dorkiest picture of both of us.


But I throw it up because it's funny and I think it's so important to be able to make fun of yourself. And he had like a gold chain.


And I'm like, Rammy, where'd you get the gold chain or whatever. So I think, you know, I'm just being funny.


We were good friends. I don't usually check my DMS on my Instagram, you know, and like maybe a week goes by and I actually look and I have a message from Romi, but it wasn't like. How are you? Blah, blah, blah. It was like straight to I would really appreciate if you take that down, I'm a really private person and I was like, oh, shit, OK, OK.


Like, I get, like, really hot. I start sweating and I'm like a little nervous, like, oh my God, what did I do, you know? And he was like a good friend of mine.


It's a funny picture and yeah.


You know, I don't take myself seriously. Yeah. By the way, I'd be flattered to have been in a photo with you on this trip. Why?


It's why he didn't like the picture of himself. And I'm friends with your stylist. And she was like, well, it's not a great picture of him. And I was like, OK, like I'm from high school. We were 16.


There aren't great pictures from high school.


I'm sure if you see someone's high school picture and it is flatter. Oh, my God, you don't want that. You don't want it.


Look, I had some weird Chowilla thing going on. I mean, that's what it was. And I you know, we're just going to accept it. But it was right before the Oscars.


And I remember Josh Schwartz being like you did him dirty.


He's about to be like, what you. Like, what do you mean? Like, this is my friend. It's a funny picture. And I was like, well, I guess I should have found something more flattering.


I don't know. Oh, God.


But I removed it and I even wrote to him like a really nice message, like, I'm so sorry, go get the Oscar. Like you're doing amazing, you know? And I never hear anything back, which is no no one was in blackface in the photo.


Right. It's like a with like as if someone was like that was definitely how it felt.


But I was super because he was always so nice and we were good friends and I was just like, I'm a big fan of not taking yourself seriously, especially at that level of fame and talent. But look, he wants to be super respected. It's his thing. So I respected it. I took it down. I was just a little bummed at how it was handled. I'll have to show you the picture.


I guarantee I'll find it adorable. Yeah, I think it's adorable.


And the gold chain, it's in how he was ahead. And Nicole loves gold. Nicole love gold.


She brought it back.


Stay tuned for more armchair expert, if you dare.


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OK, so now we're getting into Ossy, which, of course, is what the topic of your new podcast is, which has a great title called Welcome to The O.C. Bitches is solid title.


They came up with that title, I believe it was I and Josh signed off on it and he's like, that's the only one you can do a good, good, good, good, good. There's a neat barometer to judge how people are on set. One of the big tales of how someone is to work with is if people continue to work with them forever, like that's the number one for me.


Like, well, that person can't be an asshole because they keep, you know, and of course, you have this great relationship with Josh Schwartz, who created The O.C. And so I immediately that informed me, like, oh, you're great to have on a cast because why would he deal with it ever again if he didn't have to?


Well, thanks for saying that. Josh is like my brother. I think maybe it goes back to growing up the way I didn't just always being professional, because my dad would always say to me, do your job and do it well because it's your job. So I don't take it for granted. And I just like to consider everybody involved, crew, the whole thing.


So I really always do try my best to continually be grateful and professional because there's no point. You know, you work with some people that are just assholes and what and you're like, why?


It all comes from I believe in security, especially like I've seen it in lead people. I'll say I won't, you know, gender, whatever, guys.


Yeah, but just comes from insecurity, like it's how they feel more validated and in control.


In control for sure, you know, the voices that are inside them. And that's how it comes out. And it's unfortunate because a lot of these people are really talented, but it does stem from that.


Yeah, I did a movie with an older, I think several Academy Awards actor, a hero, and he had like three or four volcanic meltdowns. And at first I was like, oh, wow, I wasn't expecting this. But I saw the pattern in the pattern actually was it was always the day before he would have a day of like tons of dialogue and he was older.


It was unexcusable. The behavior was totally unexcusable. But I realized, oh, man, he's afraid. Tomorrow's scary for him to memorize three pages of monologue. And he's letting the director know, like, if I get it fucking I got it. You know, like he's scared and he's trying to set some weird boundary. We're like, hey, if I get it, man, that's that. And again, it's it's totally inexcusable. But at least I saw where it was coming from.


It wasn't just like, inexplicable. Right. OK, so are you.


Twenty two when you get the O.C..


I was twenty one when I got it. OK. Yeah. Oh perfect. You can drink with the cast.


Yeah. Because I didn't do that before.


I'm ashamed that I don't know more about the O.C. because I guarantee I would love it because I was obsessed with Beverly Hills ninety two and I mean it was just, it was my life.


But you weren't originally a cast member right. You weren't cast as like the main group initially.


Right. I was a guest star I think for like the first eight episodes I want to say. But Josh just liked what I was doing with the character. I really liked the Seth Summer dynamic. That's Adam Brody's character and myself, and just went with it because he liked what was happening. I think he said I had him want to align. I had that was like Adam, he got to be. And he was like, OK, like she's cast.


She's got like, uh huh.


It's kind of the best thing that can happen, right? Because you as a guest star, you're like, well, this when I'm like proceeding as if this will end and then then find out, oh my God, it's so rare that that happens.


And you don't have to like test, which is when, you know, you go in front of all of the big wigs at the network and you have to audition for them, too. And it's totally nerve racking. And I think a lot of people choke. I know I would. So I got to skip that step, which was suit me because I definitely wouldn't have gotten it if I had.


It's so nerve racking, but. Yeah, and so I it was it was great. I mean, obviously I couldn't have asked for anything better and for to just keep growing and progressing the way it did.


Yeah. So it was like an overnight phenomenon. It was like Beverly Hills ninety two and it was like in the zeitgeist was you everyone's on covers of magazines and stuff. That's a tremendous amount of attention to get it. Twenty one.


Did you feel like better set up to deal with that having been around this stuff so much.


You know it is interesting, like Mischa was sixteen, OK. Oh my gosh. I can't even imagine. I think I kind of got a lot out of my system early growing up in L.A., so I wasn't at the clubs falling out of the cars.


Pantelis but it was a little different for me.


And I was in a relationship during the show, which I think also helped with Adam or.


Yeah, with Adam at home playing board games and watching really great TV like Jeopardy! We did go out, but it was just a different thing.


Yeah, there was like stability within the stability and I did grow up kind of fast, did all the stuff a little early. So they both were working in my favor.


I don't. If you know this, but we are in love with Adam, yeah, he was on his show, right? Yes, yes. I think he's so talented. Yeah, he's super talented. He was super cute. He was like a kind of a I don't know what they say. Yeah.


But I like him because his interests are so eclectic and he's so knowledgeable on so many things. And I mean, I got to direct him in chips and just like the things you give him and what he could do with it, like in one second, it was like probably my favorite person I've ever directed. I just love them.


So I'm sad you're not married, I guess. Has a long way to go, that is. Yeah, I think we do a lot of double dating.


If you guys were married. Yeah, we probably would. I should just find someone that we could double date with. I think that's the goal here.


OK, well, let's put that out into the ether and we'll see what we are in the water. That's the real reason for this interview. Of course it is.


Yeah. Brody is so cool. I mean, he really could do anything with the material and just make it his own. And his choices were always so smart. And I really admired that.


And I think working with him that young really helped me acting wise because I was working opposite him and it made me grow tremendously well.


I bet what you saw in him was a confidence that allowed him to be loose, but it was a freedom to kind of make it your own, not be afraid to choose improv, whatever it is that made it so much more comfortable to, like, try things and just do it and be whatever you want to be.


I remember even a really stupid, insignificant example for me was being on parenthood like year one, and I was walking with joy through a like store. And like normally prior to that job, I would have been thinking like, oh, what do they want? They want this emotional thing. And I just had the moment to go. I've never walked through a store where I walked by those little squishy balls where I didn't grab one and then juggle it the rest of the time I was at the store.


Right. And just because I wasn't so focused on what they wanted and I actually had a second to think how I walk through a store. Right. Like I did that. So even though I'm seeing the words. Exactly, I've actually just thought, like, what do I do want to store? Not what do they want me to do when I walk through a store.


Yeah, but that's so smart. And then it's also a better performance because it's more natural. I'm like, oh yeah, I'm concentrating so hard on not dropping the ball.


I think it was all about the ball. Yeah.


But then you're not so focused on the words. And usually I think for me anyways it's a better performance.


Yeah, I totally agree. Now how quickly in the shooting that did you and Brody start dating?


It wasn't immediate. He had a girlfriend. I think I was dating someone my first few months. Definitely within the first season is I went four seasons and you guys were together for three years.


So did you guys break up on the show? And if so, what on earth is that experience like?


We broke up at the very end, so, OK, there wasn't much after the breakup.


We did get married after we broke up on the show, which was, oh, that's all good. And that feels like they did that to you. I'm totally that was like the only scene left to shoot was the wedding.


Oh, you broke up. Let's give you a wedding. Yeah. Oh yeah. That was definitely the end. But, you know, we still got along really well. I had so much and still do love and respect for Adam. And we went through so much together, being so young and everything with the shows. And I'm so happy for him with his family and his beautiful wife and kids and everything.


Yeah, she's lovely. No disrespect to her when I want you guys to be married, but then why do they live in fucking Topanga?


So I will never see them ever, ever, ever, unless we work together.


But you live in those feelings. Yeah. Yeah. So it's just a better fit for my lifestyle. Yeah. It's just logistically, geographically convenient.


Oh. So your new podcast bitches. Yeah. See bitches. Welcome to The O.C. Bitches. You and your friend who is on the show.


Yes, she is. Mom Julie Cooper, a.k.a. Melinda Clark is doing it well in New York. Yes. She's so awesome and was always so cool. And we kind of both started off as the O.C. bitches like our characters and everything.


And I thought it would just be so fun to recap them all with her.


She's so entertaining and just really, really cool. Yeah.


So, yeah, I asked her and we are very excited.


You will talk about a specific episode per episode. Yeah. Yeah.


So it is a re watch based podcast, but we'll definitely talk about everything we've done one so far and basically catching up, shooting the shit, talking about behind the scenes stuff. But there is one episode in particular we're supposed to cover now.


What is your experience? I was just talking to oh, on Monday, Monica, one of the guests, I was saying to them, I noticed Chips came up on HBO, Max, like they've added it and I saw it there. And the amount of fear I had looking at the poster, I was like, I know better than to ever watch this movie again as long as I live because I have a memory of what the movie is, OK?


And I don't want to fuck with that memory. I love the. Summary of what it is, because I was one time in Europe and the only thing that was on TV in English was punkt, I watched about eight minutes of it and I was like, oh, my goodness, this isn't anything. What I remember was Eidelson Parenthood, right?


I haven't I want to, but I'm I'm also nervous because I remember that as being great, I get I mean, going back and watching is The O.C. I was sobbing basically because what life was then and being that young and not knowing what it is now and what it's going to be and the fashion, it was just horrifying.


You know, it was just it was really interesting to kind of go back and see yourself in that time and not have a crazy reaction, you know, emotional reaction, especially after the year we've had and just being like, holy fuck things. Sure. Yeah.


You had such a community and you were with those people, what, nine months of the year? 12 hours a day. Yeah.


Yeah. And now you're all by yourself.


And then 24 hours a day with a six year old teaching kindergarten for a little it took a turn.


It took a took a sharp turn. Should not feel for me. It's just like, oh my God, this little person that knows nothing.


It is so weird even for anyone. Like, I know I'm home and I'm in my childhood bedroom and like, looking at pictures and there's like cheerleading stuff. And I and it is so strange to look at it and think like that person doesn't know what's about to happen. Right. Till I get back into that headspace of like, oh my gosh, it's very mindfuck to be like that person doesn't know what's about to happen. I right now don't know what's about to happen in the future.


Like a time machine. Weird shit like. Yeah, just that's basically what's happening.


You and your bedroom, me watching the show. Yeah. It's the same idea. You're just like, wow, that person had no idea.


And Monica, the risk of making you sound self-congratulatory, which I don't want to do. But when you're looking at that cute little gal from Georgia, from Duluth in the cheerleading outfit, are you proud of her? Yeah, I am.


I am. But that's not the resounding feeling. It's weird.


I think that should be the resounding feeling. Right. But it's more like a life is so crazy. You don't know where it's going to go and where it's going to take you. And it's it's exciting. But there's a there's a fear there. That person had so many dreams and then she did all these. You almost separated, as you can see her as a different thing. Yeah, I watch the movie of it a little bit and it's and to know there's more coming.


Another movie that I don't know yet, you know, it's like, oh God, what's that going to be right.


More like anticipatory anxiety. Yeah. It's like, yeah it gives me anxiety. Well, let's hope it's not a year seclusion with a six year old. Sorry, Rachael.


Yeah. Let me just tell you one thing to avoid. You know, it's going on right now.


Great. So what is your anxiety level then throughout your career? Is it been helpful that you, again, had three generations of people that never did start having picked this career? Because I know most of my friends who are in this business who have moved here from somewhere else and feel like they got incredibly lucky as I do. You also have this healthy fear of like, oh, the right is going to be over, like there's just too much luck involved.


If you avoided that.


You know, some ex boyfriends have called this a problem that I'm kind of like floating in a bubble, so to speak.


And I'm like, OK, but it's just because, like, I'm not like dark and anxious or like negative or something, I don't know.


But I try not to get wrapped up in what's going to happen. And it's hard. It's a practice like it's really hard to stay present. But with my mom, as you know, raising. Yeah.


Aside from tantric sex as being present and in the moment has been a big thing as well.


So I try to just be like, you know, good attitude. I definitely practice trying to stay present and not worry.


This is a totally inappropriate question, but I am going to ask it and Monica can cut it.


But would you hear your mother in my living throes of these sessions, like you walk along like it's one thing to hear your parents talking, like we've all heard it, but it's over quickly. You're like, oh, it's gross, but it'll be over quickly.


But if you hear your mom rev up, I could be hours all night long. I'm sorry. I got to get over this tantric sex thing.


My parents divorced when I was nine, so she was a single mom. So a lot of that wasn't brought into the home.


I thought you were asking if when Rachel was having sex, if she could, like, hear her mom's like and with her like if her head was filled with, oh, my God, I want to talk show once.


And I think I brought up cunnilingus and I called it that because my mom does. And I think with Wendy Williams and she cut it, she was so horrified that I had that word.


And I was like, but isn't that like the proper way to say, yeah, maybe she's like, why are you talking about it?


Unfortunately, I didn't think I'd ever say this, but I'm going to have to side with Wendy on this only in that it's one of the few medical versions of it that sounds way grosser than any of the. Oh, that was her problem with it, though, right?


Was just like the idea of a dude going down on the girl was just like, well, I was going to say Williams daytime show, right? But like this accent.


But yeah, if you say, like, oh, this person went down on this person, you know, oh, that sounds fun. And we say this person committed kind of like this person.


It sounds like your vagina was murdered, like, brutally. Yeah.


It sounds a little bit like a blunt force. Yeah, I go over.


OK, now here's another fun thing. And again, I kind of flatter myself into saying I was a part of it, but there isn't really any proof of it. But it did all happen at the same time. So I was shooting Baby Mama in New York and I was there for about three months and I had been in some tabloid photos. So it was like if you were in any way investigating, it would be clear. I was in New York, OK?


The my house was broken into and robbed. Now, I then learned your house was broken into. I knew that. I didn't know multiple times. Multiple times, five times.


Not only that, I read that one of the robbers said they got so comfortable they pooped in my bathroom, which was a million times worse than stealing my designer person.


I was never going back in this house.


I never said, you know, like that's when they said, like, really, that's what you want to divulge to Vanity Fair, that you took a shit like what is happening here.


Oh, my goodness. Rachel, the biggest takeaway. Thank you. Thank you.


That was not in my notes. And that is by far my favorite part.


That's the best part of the whole thing. I mean, let's be honest. We watching that gruesome docu series about the East Bay Strangler, Golden Street.


You know what was on Netflix? Was it the Netflix one that? I think so. He had like three or four names, I don't know, Golden State killer. Golden State killer. Getting his jam was kind of like Thai people up and then just relax, eat some food, cook some stuff. Oh, so fucking weird.


Oh, my God. People are fucking weird and think like that's the thing they're getting off on. Like I would be panicked in that situation. Like I got to do whatever weird thing I got to do and I got to do it on a time clock because the cops are going to show up.


And this person was like, like, what is I'm going to get out of paper. I'm going to plop right down.


Now, this is relevant. I think that there are men and women involved in the Bling Ring. Yeah, I believe so, yeah. So is it the female that shit in your house or. It was like said no, I would pick that. Is that we your pick. Yeah, of course it's the girl.


I mean the guys don't give a shit. They're like they you know what I mean. There's nothing to them. But this girl was like, you know, I'm going to fucking poop.


Yeah. I kind of like this girl. I mean, I hate to say. Oh, no, no. OK, all right.


So here's how I felt about it. Yeah. I'm also a guy, right? And I own a gun and I have been in a lot of fights at the threat level for me wasn't triggered. Like I wasn't worried someone's going to come hurt me, which is drastically different for you, obviously. But when I discovered it, I guess my first thought was like, I'm glad they didn't trash my house like they stole shit. That's a bummer. But I'm glad I'm not replacing, like, windows.


And they didn't tear everything apart. And I was out of town and it clearly happened like a month ago. So it was like long over. But for you, it was really scary.


Right. You know what it was until I found out that it was a group of kids who just were going around stealing designer shit or expensive, whatever it was.


It was like, OK, at least it's not some crazy, like, serial killer wanting to kill me and stab me with some Kirsten Dunst obsessed with Brad Pitt.


Yeah, right.


Like, it made it a little more comforting, for lack of a better word. These kids were just like, oh, I like how you dress. I'm like, OK, my flattener.


And I said, thank you and fuck you. Yeah. Thank you.


And were you you know, I was in Canada at the time. Apparently my door was unlocked, something really stupid, you know, like they just kept walking in so nothing was broken, just like you.


Nothing looked a mess, just everything was gone. But it also taught me to not have any sort of attachment to material things.


But at that point, yet you had a really extensive cool you're super into fashion. Right? So you had a ton of neat clothing.


Yeah, I was really into the collection. I had a lot of it was those designer bags and shoes. And Monica, like we talked about, who the fuck is going to wear these shoes?


Who is buying these. Yeah. Were they selling them or were they wearing. Well, nothing was ever recovered.


I got a terrible hunch that every morning when this lady had to evacuate, she put on a pair of your shoes to the bathroom.


That is a part of enlisted thing. She probably didn't want her to or the shoes.


She just really went and ran with it.


Now, you aren't ever like at court or anything, right? You never saw these people in real life? No.


Did I go to a police station once? Maybe that's kind of vaguely familiar. You know, I never had to see them. And then there was a movie made about them that I never watched because I was like, let's not glorify this, you know, like I'm over it, but, like, does not glorify it.


Did Sophia make that? Yeah, she did, which was kind of surprising, but I didn't see it. So in all fairness, I don't know what it was about. Really.


Herein lies the complicated part about life is like when you know somebody it's one thing. And then like looking at it from the outside, if I live in I'm back in Michigan and I hear I can almost frame it as like this punk rock thing where these people were like, we're going to just go through people's shit like. And then, of course, if I know a human being and I personally was robbed, then it's like, oh, it's not very punk.


It's just it's annoying and it's not cool. But I can see why Sofia would be drawn to that, because it's just like anarchy. Yeah.


Yeah. No, I get it. And nothing against her. Yeah. Yeah. And it's a really, really interesting commentary on that moment in time, which is well am I right in that they were picking people that they knew were out of town from tabloids? Isn't that part of it?


I think so. I mean, I think it was pre Instagram, if I'm not mistaken. Yeah. So they could go on and see. But you could tell you could see paparazzi photos of people going to the airport and know that they're out of town.


Yeah, that was definitely part of it.


It was like, oh, seven or eight I think. Something like that. Yeah. Yeah, that sounds about right. But it is a weird comment on the culture at that point.


Yeah. That like people are getting tracked. I think a lot of people were like, oh yeah, that's a great way to to try you on.


Yeah. I remember at the time paparazzi was such a big thing then in particular, you know, with all the Britney stuff, everything like I remember being in those feelings and being followed by numerous.


I know it still is a thing now, but at that point now like we to Graham, right. Because there wasn't Instagram and all those things. So it definitely was heightened.


I feel like in some ways Instagram has kind of been a one of the positive things about it is it's taken the allure out. Like, you know, celebrities are posting. They're giving away their personal lives.


It's in their control. You know, exactly the same with the kids stuff, you know, and the whole thing that I stand with you guys as well. It's like I don't show my kid, you know, I have that choice.


Obviously, the paparazzi gets it. It's different.


But you can control those things with social media, which is really nice.


Yeah, well, what it really did is it destroyed the marketplace. So, like, why am I going to buy a photo of Britney for a million dollars when I can watch her currently dancing in her house, just dancing, twirling in her foyer.


She's giving us something much better than this paparazzi, right? Yeah, right. So there's there's no value to it.


And then, yeah, you are a part and we thank you for that. You are an early member of our No Kid Policy Coalition for sure. And we kind of ruined the marketplace for that. Like we got enough places to commit to not buying them, that they then became valueless and it kind of worked. I knock on wood. I would hate for that to come back.


But no, I know, but I always love what you guys say, what Kristen says. It's like they didn't choose, like they don't have the choice. And so I just think that's a great mentality. They didn't choose to be put in this position. Right.


People would say that when we started it out, there was a lot of the oh, get over yourself. You're so lucky and rich, which is all true. You chose this. I'm like I did, and it's annoying, but I can accept it. But they did not. And no one else is paying for the sins of their parents in America. That's not our system. No, you can't jail the son of some crook.


That's not what we do. Right? Right. No, that's totally true. OK, now I just want to stop on one movie, which is Jumper, which I absolutely fucking loved. It was so good. Did you go all over the world or was it all did CGI?


No, we did travel a lot. I didn't go as many places as Hayden and Jamie did like they did Tokyo. I don't think I shot there, but we went to Italy, we shot and we actually shot in the Colosseum, which was one of the coolest experiences of my life, like the sun coming up and we're inside the Coliseum. And I was like, holy fuck, this is insane. Yeah.


And working with a director like Doug Wyman, who is so creative and just we were on the flight to Rome. I was fast asleep, not even in my wardrobe as a character, like no makeup, whatever. I'm passed out probably drooling the whole thing. I wake up to his, like, red camera in my face. Oh, wow.


Grabbing the footage, grabbing some footage and like, OK, you're just on the plane and I just go with it, you know, and I forget maybe part of it was used or not, but that's just how it was working with them.


That's fun. Yeah, it was totally fun and it was a great experience. We did our press junket at the pyramids in Egypt. It was just this crazy. Oh, wow. Super cool experience that, you know, I'll never forget.


OK, now one follow up question. I have to that is I once dated a girl and she had been married and her husband, their first date was he took her on the Concorde to Paris and she was saying how they fell in love. And I was like, certainly you really did fall in love, but also pretty fucking easy to fall. Yeah. Oh, boy.


On The Bachelor because I breed.


I fell in love at the den, which was the back bar at Denny's here on Sunset. Like that's what. We fell in love and we both will. Yes, she drank them out of tequila and I drank them out of Jack Daniels. It was time to go. If that's romantic and you guys fell in love in that scenario, I kind of trust it. But do you think it's easier to fall in love with someone having had that crazy experience?


There's certainly a truth to it. Like like The Bachelor with these, like, extravagant dates where like, of course, you're going to fucking fall in love, like on a hot air balloon over the fucking Grand Canyon.


Like, you know, you're not going to forget that.


Yeah, I think the Rome factor, I'm sure, was an element to it, because it's not the more really Italy and food and whatever, but it was obviously more than not for Haden and I.


But there's definite truth to environment. Yeah.


Forget the romantic part, which is definitely part of it. But I would even go further and say it's more like the friendships that are forged in war or on the police force. It's simply incredibly heightened. And you're sharing this very unique, heightened experience with another human being. And just you two now have this shared experience, which is really unique and yet to be in the is like who are you going to tell that to? That will understand that had the feelings inside of that privilege?


Yeah, no, you're totally right.


Or even going through a trauma together or whatever it is. Yeah, both because it's heightened like that. It's this bond that can't be replicated.


Stay tuned for more armchair expert, if you dare.


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I'm gathering that you watch The Bachelor, so I'm just going to turn you armonica loose for like 30 seconds. You watch The Bachelor? Yes, I wanted to interrupt and talk about. Yeah, yeah. Do it. Do it all day.


Are you watching it right now? I am, but I'm I'm at hometowns, but I kind of saw something online, so I already know one of the people that doesn't move on.


Yeah. I'm not I'm not going to spoil. I'm super bummed about it, though, because they're the one that I thought was like the most genuine. But it's not hurt.


He's not going to pick her. I think they've already broken up who we picked. Yes. I think I know who it is. I think he picks Rachel.


That's what I think, too, because he seems the most like, you know, attracted to her. Yes. Yes.


But then I think they've all broken up. And I wonder in this, you know you know, the whole thing with her and the antebellum and all that stuff. Yes.


I feel like that comes up in next episode. I think he finds out or I think this all is going to implode next week. I'm so excited. OK, that's exciting.


Although I will say Matt James is like the most genuine bachelor I've seen. Oh, my gosh.


Wait till you see Monday's episode, OK? It's like that thing with his dad that's like truly just Markopolos, because we normally watch together that I came home and he told me and he was just like sobbing. Oh, just sobbing on the pillow. And he's like the dad, the short dad.


The dad was, oh, I'm going to cry.


I cried when Michelle saw students and the student read the letter that she wrote her, I was like, Why are you not down on one knee?


I know it's because he's blinded by blinded by the face. Yep, I know. Maybe Michelle will be the next bachelorette we should watch together next season. We absolutely should, guys.


I could have gotten completely naked during all this and neither of you would have noticed and it crossed my mind. That was so thrilling to watch you guys light up. Rachel, you are lit up like a Christmas tree, like you're nine months pregnant or something. Yeah, no, I can talk about it all day.


Two things I want to bring up. Just to add a little fuel to this bachelor thing. Monica, tell Rachel about our trip to Turks and Caicos, because Monica at this point has meant every single A-list human being alive through being friends with Kristen and I has yet to be excited once.


Go, Monica, we were in Turks and Caicos. And have you watched all the seasons or are you your spotty? I'm pretty well. OK, so my favorite season is Molly and Jason and Melissa.


That was my time, but I know who they are. Oh my God.


I was my first season in and I love everything about it. I'll never forget it. I downloaded episodes of it after on iTunes so I could watch whenever I wanted to. And I watched like many times I loved it so much. And Molly and Jason at the same resort we were at and Turks and Caicos and I found it on Instagram.


I was like, oh my God, I think. I think they're here. Oh, my God. Well, because she stalks them on Instagram. Well, yeah, well, I follow that like the worst of it. Then there was some event that DAX and Kristen had to go to and it was like, oh, they are going to be there. I was just sweating, like, so excited. Oh, my. But I was like, I can't eat like this.


What, do I handle it. Yeah, I totally get it.


No, the star struck factor, the bachelor people.


I think for me, other than Larry David, who I couldn't, I had to run the opposite direction other than him. It's the bachelor world for me.


She was on curb this year. Oh. A very quick scene.


Isn't that amazing. I was so jealous. I'm so jealous. It was very exciting. Shut the fuck up.


We haven't been on curb. You have.


So, yeah, that's true. It was very exciting. It was very, very exciting.


If I had to use a one word to describe Monica's experience that Turks and Caicos, I would use the word preoccupied.


OK, now now I want to go to one more thing that Monica just informed me about last week in my head was spinning about this detail. Of course, it makes sense, but I had never considered it, which is there is a weekend where he just fucks all of them like he but one after another, he, like fucks all three of them. And that's just wild. That's on TV. And I just can't I must be so weird to be like girl number three.


And you're like, oh, you know, I had talked to Nick Viall about it and he told me it doesn't always go down OK.


And in his season, I feel like he maybe only slept with the girl that he proposes to revive them.


Oh, I think so.


But a lot of the times I think they do. But you're right, DAX, because I've thought about that. Like, if, you know, she has the first date, they have to keep it a secret because no girl is going to be like, all right, I'm going to be sloppy seconds, sloppy fourth, you know, like that.


I wouldn't do it.


So they have to I'm pretty sure they keep them sequestered.


I know they don't they don't like. No. So Monday was fantasy suite. Of course, I arrive, I land and I'm like, so I got to watch The Bachelorette. And they're like, OK, I like we'll watch. And we're sitting. My dad's like, so what is happening? What is that like?


Our dad is from India. Rachel, you need to know that. I think that's right.


You know, when I said, hey, look for me, I mean, tie dye, I'm going to tie dye outfit, he's like, I don't know what that is. But anyway, so we're sitting down and he's like, what is this?


I was like, well, there's three girls left and he has fantasy suite dates with them. So he's going to have sex with all of them.


And he's like and then he just sat there for a second. He was like, I'm leaving to the other room.


OK, so I think this is misogynistic. But I got to say, it feels even weirder that when it's flipped. So if you're the guy, if I'm the guy and I'm going third to the girl, The Bachelorette, I'm getting into that sweet.


And I'm like, her vagina probably hurts. Like she's worn out.


Like, I'm going to be in there and learn, right?


Oh, they do. I don't know if it's a full week, but I think it's like a day you got to take a rest day. Well, that's what I'm saying.


About a third. I'm like, this thing's been getting hammered for the last three days straight. And now I got to get in here and try to give some closure and make my mark and convince her I'm great at this.


I mean, it feels a little different for the guy. Like no one goes in. He's like, this guy's penis is probably saw. That just is not a thought you have.


That's not an issue. Brandon, wasn't it like four and one night. Yeah. Doesn't she talk about that way.


One of the girls plowed four dudes in one night. No, no, no. Say four times. Yeah.


Oh wow. I got to get on this show. But he didn't win.


He did not win. I mean he won that night, but he did not win the show.


He won the night, but not the war.


Yes, exactly.


They are fighting a senior version, which I feel like I know which I feel like I would fall into because these people are twenty one years old. Sunlike is the senior version like thirty nine, because then maybe I could go on in the geriatric.


Oh man. So are you single right now. I am. OK, have you ever played with the idea of joining that Rhia thing?


No. I mean, yeah, you know, a lot of people are on it, but people don't know about riot.


It's like a dating site. Dating form. Yeah. For people who have some public notoriety, I guess some varying degrees.


And I think my boyfriend was on it. Oh yeah. Ben Affleck fucking was on Rhia.


I was on it for Monacan Jass. I had to join it as a challenge. I hated it. I don't know if I were a gal.


I most certainly would want to fuck a professional athlete. Like if I was going to have a one night stand, I would go on there shopping for a professional athlete.


That seems like it'd be really strictly quarterback. Yeah, yeah, yeah.


They might have CTE and then kill you. Well, yeah, that's a problem. Something to look out for. Only if you turn it into. By the way, one of the bachelors is a football player. Do you think he had CTE? I watched the one where an. Roger's brother was on. Oh, yeah, yeah, well, they're still together, by the way, and engaged, are they? Yes. Oh my God. Just like Suni and Woody.


Oh, God. Well, Rachel, I adore you. And everyone listens to. Welcome to The O.C. Bitches. It sounds very, very fun. And I think it'll be huge because there's so many Ozzy lovers and what could be more fun. And there was a podcast about when you can bet your ass I would be involved with every episode.


Well, there probably is tax. All right. Well, Rachel's so fun to see you, too. Thanks for having me.


Yeah. Good luck with everything. Thank you. All right. Bye bye.


And now my favorite part of the show, the fact check with my soul mate Monica padman stroke slowly.


What a great song. Do you think it's Groser?


Yeah. Yeah, it's really gross. What I want to talk about. OK, what do you want to talk about? Rachel Bilson. Oh, Arby.


Oh RBOC Urbis. Do you know ARV's mean I was thinking of Aaberg Aaberg.


The original gangster, the original Ginzberg, but you're thinking of Arby's beef and cheddar horsey sauce. Oh, man. You know, first of all, I don't think everyone realizes Arby's is phonetically spelled R B, I know. I like that roast beast.


That's what I thought. Roast Beast. And we were talking about the sausage today. And Monica in general isn't a horse radish person, and I really am. Yeah.


And then when you got curious about how does Horse even get involved in that, I'm going to guess, OK, it's a radish that horses love to find and dig up and root around in any OK. And they prefer them. They prefer those spicy ones.


The word horseradish is attested in English from the 15 90's, formerly used in a figurative sense to mean strong or coarse and the word radish. OK, so a strong tasting radish.


OK, so the horse used to be the high watermark for strength. I guess right now we have steam engines. Oh, in German it's called at all. And in Japan it's called wasabi.


So we have it. We have a big thing to talk about. Oh, Kirsten Dunst. Oh right.


How old was she.


We can figure this out. OK, all right. Fast time. So this is frm t she is thirty eight now. Yeah. OK, got it.


So thirty eight. Twenty one. That's seventeen. So she was born in 83. OK, OK, continue. All right, well, here is a movie factually oh, what was what was born in 82? OK, yeah, that could go either way, April, right? April eighty two. Yeah, and next week. Next week, correct. Interview with the vampire was in ninety four. So that would make her a No. 90 for that make or ten.


It says she was 11. None of these things add up.


She said the actress gave him a peck on the lips for the ninety four interview with the Vampire and one of her first big screen roles ever. Now that it's been twenty five years since the Gothic romantic horror film was released, she still stands by her original reaction on shooting the scene. In her words, quote, Yeah, it was gross. I stand by that. It would have been so much creepier if an 11 year old was like, it was great.


You'd be like, there's something wrong with this child. Hmm.


I think it'd be like when you have to kiss your uncle on the lips leaving the family reunion.


I hated it so much because Brad was like my older brother on set. And it's kind of like kissing your brother. It's weird because he's an older guy and I had to kiss him on the lips, so it was gross. Mhm. All right. Sounds like she loved it. Yeah. It doesn't.


It's gross. Yeah. Is it illegal.


It's obviously not illegal or people would be in jail but that doesn't mean it's not gross or inappropriate. I don't know if it's inappropriate. I don't know, I don't think that what happened today I don't either.


They maybe do it digitally. What do you do if you want to write a story about a 300 year old vampire that became a vampire when she was eleven? Yeah, I don't know what you do. I guess you can't tell that story or you don't have kissing in it. I don't know. Maybe just in time. Maybe the the older males reflecting on their kissing in love lovemaking. True. Another adult. Yeah. Or yes, we have the technology.


Oh, my God. Think how about this is a great moral thought experiment. What if they could just make her CG and then they had a full on sex scene. No, no, no, no, no, no. But it's a robot. It's really easy to say no to that. It's just animation now.


OK, have you watched Bling Ring? No, me either.


But I wanted to after we talked about me too. We should watch it. OK, put it on. OK time. Yeah.


I mean I remember hearing that and being pretty fascinated by it. Yeah.


There's no way Rachel could have a positive view of that. No, it'd be impossible. But again, I just thought of myself being in Michigan at seventeen. I would like that.


Yeah, totally. OK, so you said that she went to Notre Dame and I just wanted to be clear. That's a high school. High school.


Yeah, not the college. A whole bunch of actors didn't go to Notre Dame. The college.


No, although some certainly have. Yeah, sure.


Not a lot. I'm sure one or two have Rudy remember Rudy.


Yeah. Rudy, the movie took place.


Yeah. Yeah. I went to Sean Astin or Jon Favreau. He was in that. Oh OK. How old was Britney Spears in the Ed McMahon Star Search clip. Ten, ten, ten. She was on it in ninety two.


He was like seventy, eighty two. He was what.


Seventy and ninety two. Let's find. Oh God. This is a math heavy emphasis on math. Rabbit hole. OK, so ninety two and. He was born in 40 something, I bet he was oh, my God, he was born in nineteen twenty three.


OK, so seven and thirty that's what year it was.


Ninety two. And it was born in nineteen twenty three.


OK, so we'll say twenty two to ninety two would be seventy. So he's sixty nine. Yikes. Yuck. And he looks 74. Yeah.


The different times he's from Detroit. Oh well he didn't need to say that.


Well he was beloved. He was. He was. But he did ask a girl if he could be here but he didn't.


And that was a common thing to say to kids. It was yeah.


You'd go, are you married? And they'd laugh because they're too young to be married. Then you'd say, like, you want to get married. Then they'd laugh or get creeped out, I guess, like, no, for real. They'd be like, I love you, let's get married. It would get progressively.


Yeah. Do you think his name was Edwin or Edward? Edward. But that feels like a trick question.


Like why would you even ask me that if his name wasn't Edwin.


It is Edward O.


OK, that was a double trick. Yeah it was, it was a trick within a trick. Yeah. OK, you said you loved iRobot, but it's Mr. Robot. There we go. When was Instagram launched? Because you said that the Bling Ring probably came out before Instagram 2010.


Yeah, it was way before that. And Bling Ring came out. Well, forget the movie.


The actual crimes happened in twenty six.


Oh right. The movie came out in twenty thirteen actually but ok. Yeah. The crimes.


Yeah. That's when the dump was taken in here. I can't believe that it's pretty gangster.


I'm sorry that happened but oh it's like someone took a poop in your house and you did not like it.


Who did. A homeless gentleman. Oh OK. Let's be clear. A homeless gentleman, a presumably homeless someone was living in the house when it was under construction and they pooped in a bathtub and left the poop in the tub. I think this person pooped in the toilet and flushed it. How would they have. Oh, yeah.


Because she told. Yeah, because she didn't come home and discover a turd in her bathtub. Yeah. It was revealed in her testimony or something.


But I don't I'm trying to think what I would rather have someone poop in my tub right now across the street. Right. That is going to be removed anyway. Yeah. Or someone break into my house and poop in my act of toilet. I think I would pick my deserted house.


Correct? Yeah. I don't want to see the poop.


Well, I saw it and I had to dispose of it.


Yeah. That part I don't like. Yeah.


Well I want to tell that story really quick because I think it was one of my my best moments of clairvoyance. So here's a brag showing Ryan Hansen the house he had never been. That's right. Now we didn't live in it. It was just, you know, we just got it. And we're in one of the bedrooms. And I noticed like me and there's a lot there's more stuff in here than I remember.


It was like the big trash can. And there seems to be some like work clothes and like maybe a rake and some shit.


Yeah. And some ascertained bottles, which is what people have. Acetone or acetone, maybe acetone, acetone, asshole tone.


And I said to Ryan, oh, my God, there's I think there's more stuff in here. Like someone's been in here and he goes, You think someone's sleeping in here?


And I immediately said, if there's a poop in the bathtub, someone's sleeping here. We walk directly into the bathroom. And by God, there was a fucking poop in the bathtub.


I couldn't believe you. Do you do that until you said the reason you knew is because you've been in that position.


Now, the reason I knew is that if you're living in a house and you have no respect for it, why would you so you're going to either walk out of the house into the cold at night was in the winter light, isn't there?


No, none of the toilets worked.


They were actually ripped out. Oh, OK. So your options are go outside at night where it's cold and lean against something and evacuate outdoors. Sure. Or sit comfortably on the edge of a bathtub and evacuate.


Yeah. You're definitely picking up. Yeah.


OK, so maybe what you said is that's what I would do. That's right. Yeah. Yeah that's what you said.


That's how I come to every conclusion. Is anything like what would I do if I was living in this house. I bet I would have been yes I would poop in the bathtub inevitably, like maybe even the first few nights you did go outside.


And then one night he is like, he's huffing all that acetone. You fucking go outside my trip.


I'm going to go get for you, girl. I wish we knew I would like it more if it was a girl.


Yeah. Because you had to clean it and you probably would have liked to clean up girl. I know. So it is so stupid. But it's true. I think all humans would rather clean a girl, dump even girls.


Yeah. Yeah.


And the poop is poop. I know the human body turns food into the. Exact same thing, whether it's coming out or menorah majora. Oh, boy, I think it's just because boys are gross, like they eat all kinds of crazy shit and their asses smell and then they don't wipe. Well.


Well, I don't know if we can say that, but I will. Well, they have more hair in there. Men have hairy, but some women have hairy.


But yes, but proportionally men have much heavier.


I don't know. I don't know. I don't know about that. Well, I really don't.


I have seen a tremendous amount of female butts and male butts and male butts are generally covered in hair. The butt cheeks covered the cheek, the inside the tank, the perineum, the anus and up and OK, it's just hair galore back there.


Generally for boys, it's not hair galore for women. Well, because girls have to shave and wax and all that, they don't shave their butt cheeks.


Women don't. Some people might. I know. And I'm not trying to shame those people. I'm just saying in general, we both know that women don't get super hairy butt cheeks, I guess mostly, but some people do.


And that's OK. Yeah, it's great. Um, my house apparently has a bunch of coyotes living there in it outside and then they go inside for a break. They are living in the backyard.


How did you find that out? Because Audra went with the designer and the neighbor came out and was like, hey, be careful because societies have found a pack of coyotes in your backyard.


Is that scary? Yes, not well, no. But it didn't hurt people. No, they don't ever. OK, yeah. I hope they don't love it and like, come live with me. They'll keep the skunks away.


And you don't have a dog. I know. It's like what if I turn them into my pet? You know, I was one of those people who who likes you'd be called the little exotic animals. Well, no, I think you'd be you'd be known around town as the Los Feliz Coyote woman, which is a cool moniker.


Oh, all right. I'll consider it. I don't rule it out.


Don't have a knee jerk reaction, you know, out of here. OK, thank you.


They could totally protect your house. So if they really love you and you fed them a lot and groom them. Yeah, snuggle down. If there was an intruder, they would go berserk.


That's what people think when they have tigers, do they?


Yeah, they think it's for home protection. I think they think like they think well, they think they can tame it in the way that if I could tame a coyote, I know what I think and I don't mind offending tiger owners, OK? They had someone in their life that was mercurial and unpredictable and they're trying to repair the damage of that relationship with this exotic, crazy, threatening, violent animal. They think if they can tame that thing, they'll have tamed the person in their childhood.


That was crazy and unpredictable.


Yeah, I think that might be part of it. I think it's also kind of the obsession some women have with certain men where it's like, I can change them. I'm the person that can change them. They'll change for me. And I think women who have that generally had dads that they had wished had changed for them and didn't. So I'm sure that some people for sure, speaking of falling in love, so you said you fell in love with Bri at the Den.


Oh, the Denny's. Then the Denny's had a bar and back this one right here at sunset in the bar was called the Den.


But there is also a bar on Sunset called the Den. It's not that no, this was this was in the back of Denny's. And you can smoke cigarettes in there.


And we were both heavy smokers when we were twenty. I know you guys met there.


No, our first date was there. We met and she had a boyfriend. I had a girlfriend, but we liked each other, but we didn't do anything. And then it was Thanksgiving. And we're both in L.A. with nobody and it's Thanksgiving. And so my mom said, why don't you take yourself out with my credit card and have a good meal? So I called Bri and said, I have a credit card put on your very nice clothes.


I'm going to take you somewhere special. I wore a suit, I picked her up and she was in virtually a prom dress. And we went to Denny's den on Thanksgiving Day.


Both killed a fifth of our favorite liquor and smoked a trillion cigarettes and a turkey dinner. They have turkey there.


Yeah, they got like a I don't want to say terrible. You know, they have like Turkey and. Oh, wow. And it was it's probably the funniest date I've ever had in my life. I mean, like at Denny's on Thanksgiving, getting pie in the middle of the afternoon, eating that food.




That's a ding, ding, ding. Or is that what is pi I mean, drunk. OK, yeah. High for Thanksgiving. Oh OK. Yeah, I think I told you we left, we had drank them out of our favorite.


For me it was Jack Daniel's. I drank, there was no more Jack Daniel's and she was drinking some kind of tequila and they had run out of that.


Oh boy did your mom. So she didn't want to spend Thanksgiving with you. She had come here to spend Thanksgiving. Oh, I had a credit card for emergencies.


That was. Her credit card. Oh, I see. And she said, take the emergency credit card and go have a really nice Thanksgiving. She was here for Thanksgiving and said, here, take my credit card and go, what? OK, that would be bizarre as hell. OK, I see. Oh yeah.


Because I, I always went home for Christmas, so I think maybe I wasn't going to go home for Thanksgiving right before. That's what I do. Yeah. But I didn't have anything to do. That's really funny and cute. OK. Yeah. Well I thought you were talking about the den which is a bar on Sunset that Rachel and I loved because we heard that Jason Segel would go there so we would try to go to scout out for Jason Segel.


I actually I forgot about that.


A friend that was so star obsessed with you. It's so cute. Yeah, I'm sure you have.


There just probably not as honest as I am. That's possible.


What other places did you go to? Because you heard people went there. I mean, when I first visited with Anthony before we lived here, we went to the Ivy. Oh, wow. An eight, huh? That's expensive.


Yeah, I doubt we are very much. We probably, like, split us out. I remember he had a really bad headache that day and I was like, oh, don't spoil this for me, Anthony.


Right, Ivy, we're going to see Brad Pitt. Yeah. Although you didn't see anyone, right? No.


No one really goes. No, I have never eaten at the Ivy. Yeah. In my life.


After that, where else would I go to see and be seen to CNBC?


I go to CNBC headquarters like do you ever figure out where Ben Affleck or Matthew Damon hung up? I think I tried to find out where they lived, but I couldn't. I think they live in palaces.


Yes, I think I did learn it was in the Palisades and I'm not close to that location. That's not our side of town.


No, I'll keep thinking on it if there are more locations.


Yeah, just maybe that's something you update us on throughout the years. OK, I have to imagine there's more there.


There has to be. Yeah, because I'm trying to think of even I had I just wanted I wouldn't go anywhere and spend money and that's probably the only thing that kept me from doing that.


Well, we were also, you know, Rachel and I were we if we wanted boyfriends and we would love Jason Siegel, maybe he could be our boyfriend.


Sure. Sure.


And and if he couldn't be our boyfriend, maybe there was someone at the dead who could be our boyfriend, right? Oh, no one was our boyfriend there. And you never saw Jason Segel there again?


I did not. OK.


Oh, boy. All right.


Well, that's all I think I almost went to a bar. Oh, this is a good story. I may have already told it on here, but here it is. Scotty Johnson, one of my best friend. He was my best friend in L.A. I love him so much. He moved back to Michigan. He looks a lot like Kiefer Sutherland. He does. And he used to even more a high.


And so he was at a bar in Silverlake.


And he's in the bathroom washing his hands and all of a sudden Kiefer Sutherland straddles up next to him to wash his hands.


No, and Scotty says there's no clutch. This is Scotty just looks at me, goes, you get sick of hearing you look like Scott Johnson.


Oh, and Kiefer loved it. And they partied all night. And he went back to Kiefer. No.


Yes, Scotty. Of course he did. Scotty is he now? Yeah.


Yeah. So I think it crossed my mind that I wanted to go to that bar and, like, mix it up with Kiefer Sutherland, but I never did.


Oh, yeah. Oh, that's so funny.


What a great opener. Right. Great clutch. Clutch. I do remember one time Carly was I had just moved. Carly came to visit and we went to we went to Chateau Marmont.


Oh, you went to the bar.


I mean, I just remember it was so God damn stressful trying to figure out parking.


Oh, I don't know how you got it. No, we had to valet, which was like probably forty dollars and I had no money.


He takes twenty five minutes to I can feel the stress like I remember being like this is a nightmare.


What am I doing here. Yes. What am I doing in this city. Yeah. I do not belong here.


Well that's comfortable in particular. It was very intimidating. I'm John Belushi. Died again. I've only I've never been to that bar again and I've only been to the chateau one other time with our friends for dinner for my birthday. That was an accident. Fun, wasn't it? We were trying to go to a escape room and it was scheduled for the wrong day. So we decided to just go next door and have dinner. Just happened to be right there.




I said let's go over to Chateau and have the spaghetti. I saved that birthday party. Thank you. You're welcome.


And then we saw war dogs as Kristen hates that place. Oh, I thought you hated it for some of it.


Oh, you do. But it's so it is so see and be seen like there is something about it that I, I get the gross like I get why she doesn't like it. I guess I would think you wouldn't like it.


No hoity toity. No, because here's what I figured out. So this place opened in L.A., the Soho House.




And I heard from maybe seven or eight other people that they don't like it because everyone there thinks they're so cool. And to be honest, when you say that, what you're saying is, I don't feel cool there. That's really what you're saying.


You're there and you start feeling insecure that you're not as cool as everyone. So you go. Everyone thinks there's such hot shit there.


Well, you don't know what anyone thinks there. You don't know what people think. You just feel insecure there because seemingly these people have I don't know what they have more style or more status or whatever.


But the people aren't doing anything. They're just they're existing. And you feel insecure unless less than. And so I'm very aware of that. Now, when I go to places and I'm starting to ramp up and say that kind of thing, like everyone here thinks they're too good for blank.


You don't know what anyone thinks. But I feel self-conscious that I'm not cool enough to be there are not hip enough or not famous enough or not. That's all. That's my stuff.


Yeah. This is not a brand.


Just so you know, your whole thing is class warfare is people being above other people thinking they're better than other people. That is what's happening.


Those people don't think that, but no one thinks that whenever you're rejecting rich people who go to country clubs and talk about how rich they are, actively trying to establish that their worth is their wealth. But that's not what people are.


So it's not fair to say that the people at the country club are doing it, but the people at Soho House aren't, because you happen to like the Soho House and did not like the country club because you grew up there. They're doing, in my opinion, the exact same thing you can like it or not like it.


But I just think my thing is more specific than, you know, it is like what gets you into Chateau Marmont, like Salman Rushdie was there one night, like the first time I ever went there, like Salman Rushdie was in one corner.


I'm like, oh, my God, Salman Rushdie. That's interesting. He's an interesting guy.


And maybe Sean Penn was there and then some other eclectic, weird, interesting person. Their talents got them their their actual contribution into the bar.


Your talent shouldn't get you into a bar. You're a person on Earth and you should be able to go to a bar if you want to go to a bar.


And if if you can't, what I'm saying is I look around certain areas, latest concourse to elegance, car show, and it's a bunch of rich guys bidding fifty nine million dollars for Ferrari and they didn't even like cars. Two years ago, and they don't seem deserving of anything because all they did is make money, I don't know, I just I'm not in all of that. That's not something I'm impressed by. I'm impressed by Salman Rushdie's writing tremendously.


Like he in my opinion, he has an output that is of true value, not that he bought one stock at a certain price and became a billionaire. That to me is not.


But that doesn't mean he's a more valuable human than another person.


And now what that means is there's two exclusive clubs, one of the exclusive clubs. The entry barrier to entry is wealth. And there's another exclusive club where the barrier of entry is a creative genius. I would prefer to be around the club. That's the barrier to entry is creative genius. Every time, 10 times out of ten. How about you?


What if I got to go to work? I don't like that there is a barrier of entry. Well, that's the reality of a bar that is everyone wants to go to and they have to turn people away. So that's just a marketplace reality then.


I just don't want to go to that place. That place is doing something that I think is a problem, which is picking humans over other humans because they are, quote, better because they're in movies or they wrote a book or that like I don't yeah, I don't like that. And I'm really surprised you do.


I don't like that. What I'm saying is I'm not there going. I don't like these people. I'm often at the yacht club things where I'm like, gross. I don't like these people. They're bound together because they have money. That's not why the people are bound together at Chateau Marmont. They're bound together because they have these artistic endeavors. And I don't mind that.


Yeah, I guess I also I don't like when a whole bunch of artists are sitting around talking about the impact of art or like speaking. I actually I find it pretty repulsive.


Well, I don't think Salman Rushdie was sitting around talking about the impact of his work and what they mean when something sometimes people are high on their, quote, value and what their value is, is their artistic output. Sometimes some people can elevate that to a status that I think is silly.


Well, yeah, those people are abhorrent. But someone like Sean Penn, who's just this tremendous actor, maybe the one of the best to ever live. Is processing the world differently than I am, and that's interesting to me. I would like to know his opinion on many things. A guy who manages a hedge fund, I don't know. Maybe maybe he does. Like I said, I don't think it's fair to say this person had some crazy, adventurous life.


So that makes him more valuable or interesting. I'm sure the hedge fund manager has a bunch of stories and stuff, too.


I don't mind saying that. I think you can put a value on people's contribution to our society. And I think the people who make money on other people's money are contributing less than artists and novelists and poets and stuff. That's my position.


OK, that's fun dance.