Sunday morning, Father's Callin. Every Sunday's Father's Day. What the fuck? That was pretty good, right? Hi, everyone. It is Alex, your father, back at it again for another episode of Call Her Daddy. I am so, so, so excited for this episode. Today is the official Call Her Daddy Bachelorette episode. I've been waiting to this episode for a while now, but I obviously had to have my own bachelorette to really seal the deal and be able to talk about it in the way that I wanted to. So I am going to take you through my personal bachelorette that happened a couple of weeks ago. And I'm just going to talk about bachelorets in general, because let me do a little disclaimer. If you are sitting listening to this today or watching this today and you're like, I've never been to a bachelorette, or I don't plan on going to one, or I don't even plan on getting married, it is okay. This episode is for you because technically, this is really an episode about how to handle dynamics with your girlfriends and how to handle financial differences, social differences, Life Differences. I am so excited. Let's get into it.

Bachelorette season has commenced. I'm going to first preface this with, I did not want a bachelorette. I feel like I, in the beginning, was an anti-bride. Now I've definitely leaned more in, and I'm really excited about my wedding, which is so fucking soon. It's crazy to say that. But I was someone that... I don't know. I think when I look back, Daddy Gang, it is synonymous with the way that I felt about weddings. And if you didn't listen to an episode where I talked about my feelings on getting married, I will explain it quickly. I feel like growing up, I really was adverse to the concept of getting married because, I don't know, I felt like there was just one way to do it. And weddings and marriage, it all just felt very archaic. And I was like, I don't want to do what everyone around me has done. And except for my parents, most of the relationships I saw around me was a fucking shit show. And I was like, my parents are just a one-off. They got lucky. I'm never going to get that lucky. And marriage and weddings, it's like a fucking hallmark scam, where why are we doing all this shit to ourselves?

It's so fucking stressful. Just sign your name on a piece of fucking paper if you want to get married and have a little ceremony in your backyard. Obviously, my whole outlook has changed, and I think it's because of my relationship with Matt and the work that I've done to realize that you can really create whatever the fuck you want out of any fucking situation. I am so excited now to get married, and I'm so excited to have a wedding that I have planned with my fiance, and I feel so good about it. For the most part, this wedding is full proof of I'm happy with it. I'm not doing things for other people. I'm not inviting people I don't want to invite. I'm not doing it somewhere I'm going to be unhappy. I'm not getting a dress that my mother wanted me wear, but I don't want to wear. I feel really fortunate that when I decided to get married and do a wedding, I immediately was like, oh, well, if I'm going to fucking do it, boundaries, motherfucker. And the same thing goes for a bachelorette. So I had initially told my friends because they kept asking me like, oh, my God, bitch, when are we going to do your bachelorette?

And I was like, I don't think we're going to do one, ladies. And my friends were definitely sad. They're like, Alex, come on. You got to do it. You have to have fun with it. And I My feeling about Bachelorette was just like, it looks like a fucking disaster, first of all. And I know this doesn't sound that fun, but to me, it brings me happiness and hope and serenity and calmness and peace and just joy. I like to get in bed by seven o'clock. If it was my choice, I would get in bed by 6:30, okay? I just love to be relaxed. So when I think of bachelorette, I think of, oh, my God, party culture. I have to stay awake past midnight. I got to really be up in the ante with the party tricks. And I really got to be putting my best foot forward when really the reality when I'm with my friends is we like to lay. My friend Kristin and I, our favorite pastime is sitting, scrolling TikTok, and watching a reality show at the same time, and sharing a bowl of treats, and occasionally being like, What's up?

Lauren and I, deep convos, till we're blue in the face. Lauren and I can go for five hours, and Matt will come in and be like, You guys haven't left the couch. Why are you guys still talking? Aren't you sick of each other? We're like, Oh, we're just getting to the good stuff. We're just getting to talking about you, Matt. All of these friendships, Jackie and I. Jackie and I just love to fucking sit on FaceTime for hours, and half the time we're not even talking to each other, or half the time we're talking about some dumb family shit that just is stupid and redundant, but we just want to just get the drama. But none of my friends and I are still kicking it at One Oak, and I used to be a regular. So the first nervous feeling I had towards a bachelorette was like, I don't know if I can hang anymore. Papa Coops has gone down Big Al doesn't mean on the club bar anymore. Big Al means big Al, really cozy up in my couch. So that was my first fear of like, oh, my God, I'm grandpa Coops. I can't hang.

And And the second thing was like, I have different friend groups, right? And so I have my LA friend group, and then I have my childhood friends. And I was just anxious of like, how do you intermingle people that they have all met? But I just love to emotionally connect with my friends because this is the reality, and unless you're getting married at 15, we love a child bride. No, we don't. I think my biggest other fear was, I Time is of the essence when you're an adult, okay? And when you are seeing your friends, my want when I see my friends, because it's very rare that we all get to get together, is to have deep conversations, and to connect, and to reconnect, and get updates on each other's lives. And I feel like when I picture a bachelorette, it's just debauchery and insanity and drinking culture. And how the fuck are we going to get any progress done? If anything, I'm going to leave there with a fucking anxiety hangover and be like, oh, my God, I need to hibernate for the next fucking week. And I can't do that because now we're all adults.

We've got fucking work. We can't skip class tomorrow. I don't have class. I have a fucking episode to upload for the world. Do you know what I mean? There are responsibilities that go beyond now. Okay? I'm a dog mother. I have to take my dogs out to shit at 6:00 AM. I can't be in bed till noon anymore. So I was on the phone with Lauren, and Lauren was just talking to me about, Come on, Alex. You need to do a bachelorette. And finally, I was like, Okay, Lauren, what would that even fucking look like in a way that it It wouldn't give me anxiety? And she's like, Close your eyes. You can tell Lauren's in therapy when she's like, Let's role play here. Okay? I'm like, Okay, let's role play. She's like, Close your eyes and just picture, where would make you happy? And I'm like, Okay, great question. Well, my wedding is in a tropical location, so I feel like I would love to go somewhere cold and snowy. I love skiing. I love the snow. And I feel like that would give us more to do than just sit somewhere and drink.

I want to have some type of activity to do. But again, activity, when you say activity, take it with a grain of salt. You know what I mean? I'm not a gal that's really trying to gitty up. I don't want to do excursions. I don't I'm going to do anything that really requires too much energy. But I know to some people, you're skiing is that for me. But for me, skiing, I grew up skiing. I do like sports, and it is not like I'm competing with anyone. So that, to me, is good. So I was like, maybe it's a ski trip. How does that sound? And Lauren was like, it sounds like that would make you happy, so let's fucking do it. And I will just say, I love my friends so much, and I feel so fucking just grateful that I had people that were, one, pushing me to do something that I didn't want to do. Fuck you. No. They knew at the end of the day that I would have fun if it was in the right environment. And I really appreciate appreciate them for facilitating this because I wasn't going to do it.

So Lauren was like, okay, it's settled. Let's do a ski location. So we planned Utah. And I want to just first now start with the conversation of finances. I have so many people writing in to me about finances with bachelorettes, and it is a fucking nightmare. Let's just call it what it is. And again, when I'm talking about a bachelorette, again, if you can't relate to a bachelorette, group trips, friend trips, spring break, wherever you would be going with a group of your girlfriends, everyone is on a different financial situation, right? And I'm aware I make a lot of money. And so I knew immediately, I'm going to completely cover most of this trip. I want to make sure that my friends aren't stressed. And so I immediately took it upon myself to be like, recognize that your friends are going to come, and I know they're going to spend money, and I know they're going to put effort into making it special for me. But for the bulk big chunk of the trip, I personally decided to cover. And I felt really good about that. I know some people would be like, but it's your bachelorette.

You shouldn't be paying for anything. Absolutely fucking not. I had some people being like, my friends aren't completely covering my bachelorette. And I'm like, Oh, my God, your poor friends. Listen, the reality is this to all my brides, okay? And I love you so much because I am a bride myself. I'm about to be, okay? The world doesn't revolve around you. And so as much as in your mind this bachelorette and this wedding is about to be the most important day, and it's all about you, and you're so focused on it, this isn't for them. Your friends probably have five other fucking bachelorettes that they need to go to. Sorry, you're not their only friend. And they also have their own life. If you are the bitch that is asking your fucking friends to go to Greece for your bachelorette, knock it off. Knock it the fuck off, okay? Unless you are pegging for every fucking thing. You got the plane, you got the tickets, you got the Airbnb, you got everything. Amazing. I understand there are some girls that have dreams, don't we all? I get it. We all have dreams, but maybe knock the dreams down a little bit.

Like, knock it off, okay? Bring them down a notch because you're not being thoughtful towards all these other people. Again, when When you become an adult, a lot of our friends start to get married. We got a lot of fucking events and shit to go to. We all have jobs. We all have financial restrictions. We're trying to buy homes. We're trying to get married. We're trying to pay off fucking student loans. We're trying to We're trying to fucking survive, okay? Okay, we're trying to save money, not burn money. And so there's a resentment, I think, that can happen when the bride is so unself-aware that they're asking people to spend so much fucking money. Now, Now, on the other end of things, there is also a certain obligation as a friend, like make your fucking friend feel special. My friends did not go buy me a horse and buggy to drive around Main Street in Utah with chrome rims. And let me think a little bit better. My friends didn't buy something that was going to break their fucking bank and give them actual anxiety where they were getting hives on the trip, okay? My friends went on Amazon.

They got streamers. They bought me a Shotsky. It was so fucking perfect. Every fucking detail they did, they got... They cut out of Matt's head. My friend Kristin made these matching sweatshirts that we all wear all weekend. There are ways to do things, and Every single thing they fucking did for me, I almost kept crying because it was just so thoughtful. And it's not about how much money you spend. It's about showing your... I would have been fucking happy with each of them writing me a card, a nice thoughtful card. You know what I mean? And if your friend is being a cunt and is expecting a fucking Cartier ring, tell her to go fuck herself and fucking marry a sugar daddy bitch. Like, oh, sorry. Well, your husband isn't buying that for you. Why the fuck would I? Okay? But again, I think it's like, don't let your friend feel like you didn't put an effort. And I think sometimes effort can be misconstrued, especially with what we see on social media as it needs to break the bank. It really fucking doesn't. But back to my trip. So my weekend consisted of my three best childhood friends and myself.

And Now, again, let me circle back to the conversation about friends. I have my LA friend group, and then I have my childhood best friends. I wanted to invite all of the LA people, but I also recognize my LA friends, none of them ski. Okay. Love you. You're not East Coast material, though. So I recognize, you know what? And it really felt like was the best decision I made. I said to myself, okay, I'm going to go on this trip with my childhood friends, and I'm going to do something with my LA friends at a different date. I think what my advice would be to people that are struggling with who to invite is this, invite whoever the fuck you want. I reached out to my friends in LA because I knew they would see my social media. And the truth was, of course I wanted them there. But I also knew different friend groups is okay. I want to talk to my childhood friends about all of the shit from our childhood and our parents and our families that I know that my adult friends would feel like, I don't know any of these stories.

And I think it's okay to acknowledge that, that every... Also, I think you're different with certain friends, right? I am a certain way with my childhood friends, and I'm a different way with my adult friends, and that's normal. So I think it gave me a lot of peace and allowed me to not have anxiety when I just recognized, I don't need to feel the need to merge it all together so no one feels left out. But at the end of the day, also, it's like, half the time I'm convinced people don't even fucking care, and they don't even want to go. We're all so fucking busy. No one actually wants to go. So it's like, I think they I think it's okay sometimes to just cut it off. And a lot of people were writing in to me asking questions about, well, what if you feel obligated to invite one person, even though you don't like them? No, no, no, no. You do not invite anyone to these special days, your bachelorette and your wedding, that you're not comfortable with. I get the wedding is a little difficult because it's like, fuck, there's family shit and whatever.

But with your bachelorette, if you fucking hate your sister-in-law, just be like, oh. If they ask you, be like, oh, I'm just doing a certain group of friends. I'm trying to keep it small. Love you. Let's get dinner. But the audacity some fucking people have is wild. And so to the Daddy Gang listening, it is not your job to make people feel comfortable if they are not invited to something unless it is one of your closest friends, that it would be absolutely fucking insane that you just It's like, randomly. It's like, I didn't invite Lauren, and Lauren's literally like, Can we talk? But if you are not close with someone, and they have the audacity to text you being like, Hey, I heard I'm not invited to the Bachelorette, and I'm really hurt and upset, and You guys have never been to a dinner alone. You're not close. This person makes you feel insecure. They're mean to you. Same thing if you're in high school or college, and you're planning a girls trip, and you don't want someone there. If they do not make you feel good about yourself, and this is your fucking trip, and it's about you, you do not need to fucking invite that person.

And I think when people ask me, well, what's the explanation? You don't say anything. And if they come to you, I think that's even crazier. And that's another, I would say that is that should solidify why you didn't invite them. If someone is that selfish to text someone and it's their bachelorette or it's their wedding and be like, I can't believe I wasn't invited when you're not even that fucking close, bye. It's like, this isn't about you. Read the room why you weren't invited. You're mean to me. You make me feel like shit. I don't want to feel anxious around you on a day that is supposed to be celebrating me and I'm supposed to be happy and having fun with my closest friends and people. So let's go through my weekend really quickly, because I know... Sorry, there's so many themes that I want to get to. Okay, so we stayed at this place called the Stein Erichson. It's like this lodge vibe. It's like old logy... What? Like log cabin, Yellowstone. It's just giving, it's giving, it's giving. And so we get in there and I was fucking dying because I had already prepped Jackie and Kristin.

Lauren and I sleep really well together because Lauren literally doesn't move and I don't move. And Jackie's a little too cuddly for me. And Kristin's needy in the morning because she wakes up at 6:00 AM. So I was like, why don't you guys sleep together? And Lauren and I will sleep together. The issue is that the second bedroom, I sent them. I need to fucking post this picture. When I was booking the rooms at this place, there was only a main bedroom, and then the second bedroom had bunk beds. And I sent my friends this, and I'm like, are you guys okay to sleep in a bunk bed? And Chris and Jackie were amazing. They were like, oh, my God, I fucking love it. Nostalgia, bitch. Childhood friends, let's really lean the fuck in. Bunk bed, sleepovers, let's go. So we get to the place, and honestly, it was, I will say, just a little fucking depressing because the bunk bed room didn't have windows, and it was like a closet vibe. But I love them so much, and they were such good sports. And then at the fucking end of the trip, we realized there was a fucking Murphy bed in the living room, and it was a huge fucking bed in the last night they slept there.

But we had so much fun. So we got there. The place is amazing, and we have all these fucking Amazon boxes. And I will just say I was so happy that my friends and I didn't take it too seriously, where all of I knew the decoration were in these boxes. And I wasn't like, wow, you guys didn't set up before we got here, which I'm saying because I know brides would probably say that. I didn't give a fuck. It was just so cute that they even ordered shit there. I didn't need any fucking decoration. They were so sweet. So we immediately shower, change, and we put on really crazy cute outfits, and we go to this club in Deer Valley. It's like an outdoor clubby situation. And you guys, we are in the car on the way there. And this is, again, what I just want to hopefully just give you guys this positive energy if you are about to go on to your bachelorette. We're in the car and Jackie is like, okay, do you guys think it's going to be really rowdy there, or do we think it's going to be dead? Is anyone going to be there?

We're literally going on to the St. Regis Instagram. We're trying to check what is going on. It's called the Vintage Room. It's this this tented club thing. And we're like, Do you think anyone's going to be there? And then we're all convinced because we can't see nothing is on the Instagram. We're like, you guys, it's literally going to be two creepy men in the corner with bottle service and just us. And we were amazing. We were so excited about the concept of us being the only people in the club, and it being such loser energy, and us just having the time of our lives together. And so we show up, and the fucking line is all the way down. It is the craziest fucking line. And thankfully, we had this table. So we got to go in, and we get into this place, and it is a fucking shit show. There's another Bachelorette party. Everyone is hammered. Everyone is popping champagne. And it was so fucking fun. We got the corner table, and we were in the back, which was fabulous. And we had the most fun. I need to post this fucking video of Lauren McMullen and I.

You guys, we had so much fucking fun. We were I physically peed my pants from laughing so fucking hard. We were laughing so hard to the point that we cried. Insert video of Lauren, if you're watching this episode, sobbing. We are sobbing. It's also because Chris was doing the fucking Irish jig with the penis Penis straws. Penis straws. Okay, so shout out to Lauren, because I had said to Lauren, no penises, Lauren. Okay, no penises. I'm not interested in the penises. I wanted to go out and not be sticking out a sore thumb. And so I was like, if we can just... I don't want to wear crazy all white outfits. I don't know. I was just trying to enjoy. I also don't like the color white on myself that much. That's why my wedding dress will not be stark white. But I just was like, let's just try to keep it chill, Lauren. Okay? So Lauren was like, okay, but Alex, can I just get some penis straws? Lauren was obsessed with getting the penis straws. And I'm like, fine, Lauren. The problem is that Lauren was like, I won't go too crazy on the penis straws.

But then Lauren got these tiny, thin stick-like penis straws that were skin-colored penis straws. Not cute pink ones. These are creepy, like veiny, thin little weenie straws. And so it was so funny. It ended up being amazing. And It was so fucking cute. And so Kristen is doing the fucking fiddling like a flu on the little penis straw, and she's doing the fucking Irish jig. And Lauren and I are sobbing our eyes out having the most fun. And I think when I look back, and it just makes me I'm so happy, and I really encourage everyone to have fun with your girlfriends when you're out. I feel like, obviously, when I used to be a little bit younger, I feel like every time I went out, it was just you're so focused on, understandably, finding a guy. And if there's not If you guys there, you're leaving. But something I started to do when I lived in New York, and I've carried on, and I get it, I'm in a relationship, so it's different for me. But even if you're single, I really, really think that there's nothing better than when you just commit to having a girls night.

You're not focusing on other people. You're just with your girlfriends, and you're having so much fun. And we laughed until we peed. We didn't even need to drink to party, but we drank. And then the next morning, we went and we woke up, we ate breakfast, we skied. And that morning, though, they made me sit, do my skincare in the room. And I came out, and they were so cute. I'll put pictures. It was, what did they call the weekend? Big owl gets sloshed on the slopes, who Who came up with that? Obviously, Lauren McDonald. Let me take a sip of this coffee, you guys. I can only drink coffee when I'm home because I will ship my pants. People that are like, Oh, I'm going to get a coffee before the flight. Sorry. Sorry, the plane's going down if Big Al gets in that fucking little cabin seat and blows it to shreds, okay? I can't drink coffee in public. Okay, so the second day we go ski, and we had so, so much fun skiing. Again, I was really excited that the whole weekend wasn't revolving around drinking, but I appreciated the activity that we did.

Here's the thing. Before this trip, we had a group chat that we started, and the group chat was to just plan the whole weekend. And I would like to give some advice on the planning of a bachelorette trip. I don't think one person should plan the trip. I think it leaves room for a lot of error. Is there anything worse than getting the fucking email with the bachelorette itinerary? You'll be doing this at this time, and this at this time, and you're like, I have to do two fucking excursions today, and I got to stay up past 12:00, and I got like, Are you fucking kidding me? I feel like I'm going to fucking camp, and that is not something I enjoyed in my life, okay? So I I think when you're able to plan it with your friends and make it more of everyone contribute, then everyone will feel more excited about it and less freaked out of like, Oh, God, we have to do this. And again, as the bride, if your friends don't want to fucking do something, don't get mad at them, okay? We're adults. I don't want to do a lot of shit, okay?

You know what I don't want to be doing is I don't want it to be 2:00 AM, and I don't want to have a male stripper giving me a lap dance. I don't. Because you know what? I did enough in college. I have had enough dicks and asses right up on my Fanny, and I don't need it anymore. I don't need it. And again, I'm not judging. I fucking hope if you want to fucking dick an ass in your face, bitch, get those fucking strippers. But my friends knew, don't push me, bitch, okay? I don't want that. So don't force your friends to do shit. So by the time that we completely figured out the schedule, I remember I was talking to Jackie and Kristin and Lauren And they were all like, I remember once we solidified the schedule, all of us were like, oh, my God, there's not one fucking thing on this schedule that I'm dreading. And that's what you should have. And of course, there's going to be a couple of things maybe the bride wants to do that you have to fold to. But for my trip, I was like, do whatever the fuck you guys want.

Let's just have a good time. And so we just literally skied, hot tub, drank, repeat. It was fabulous. And I'm just so fortunate to have these type of friends that we all are so different personality-wise, life-wise, and yet coming back together and having this bachelorette. I'm aware that that is not the typical bachelorette, but I did see a couple comments from people being like, Wow, Alex, I appreciate that you didn't have a huge group of people, because I feel like I just see on social media, there's this culture that's been created with bachelorette and feeling like you have to go huge and have it be so over the top. This wasn't over the top at all. If anything, you could... I know that there are so many people online that don't think I had a bachelorette because it didn't quite look like it. And people were like, Is this your bachelorette? What is it? I think it's okay to just live in the moment and have fun and not put too much expectations on things like this, because at the end of the day, I feel like when you do that, you're going to be disappointed.

And so to everyone that's a bride that's trying to micromanage, you're going to be disappointed if you're trying to micromanage everything. If you can try to just maintain some more of a mentality of, I'm getting to use my wedding as an excuse to bring my favorite girlfriends together and to have time with them that is so precious, and you may never get again. We all talked about it like, damn, we need to try to make this a tradition once a year that we all do this type of trip. But we all know that's not completely We all have different schedules, different jobs, different lives. Maybe some of us are going to have kids at some point. We're all on different places. And I think if you can try to just manage your expectations and shift it from this needs to be the best weekend ever, and we have to get so many fucking pictures, and we need it to be so cute, then you can actually enjoy yourself and leave being like, damn, I just had an incredible weekend with my girlfriends. Overall, not to be corny, but, and I don't know if they'll watch this.

They watch my episodes. I would just like to thank my friends because I felt so loved, and so supported, and so I'm just so fortunate that since our little days at St Andrew's School, and our ugly ass plaid uniforms, and being in Catholic school together, and going through the trenches with family shit, and and life, and school, and changes, and puberty, and boys, and virginities, and all of it. I'm just so fortunate that the four of us have stayed so close, and as crazy as all of our lives are and how different our lives are, the fact that we still can sit together and make time for each other, and respect each other, and support each other, and love each other, it just makes me want to cry. And I just love them so much. And we've been through so much together. And I just think that, again, these moments, sure, a bachelorette in penis straws, it's so fun. But really what made my trip was getting to sit that morning and talk with my friends for hours and sit and talk during lunch. And smile and laugh till I fucking peed and cried and just be together.

And that, I think, is what it's about. And I think when you start to focus on anything else, that's where you can go down a really, really dark spiral because nothing is ever going to be as good as you imagine it with trips like this, because we know all of our friends, it's going to be a shit show. We're all going to get in fights. We're going to fucking get too drunk. Someone's going to do something dumb. Someone's going to make you upset. And yeah, just try to fucking be present and enjoy and not stress too much. What I will say, and then I'm going to get your questions, is Matt's bachelor party. Okay, so I had this thing planned. And Matt was like, I don't really need a bachelor party. Maybe when you go away, I will go with a bunch of my friends and your brother, and we'll go to Palm Springs in golf. And I was texting one of his best childhood friends, was planning this entire bachelor party for Matt, and Matt had no idea. And so I texted his friend being like, Matt is going to try on the weekend that I go with my girlfriends.

Matt is going to try so hard to get you guys to go golf. You need to turn him down because he's trying to make it his bachelor party. He's like, Got it, got it, got it. So all of his friends deny him. And I felt so bad for Matt, you guys, because he was like, Oh, none of my friends are available, not even your brother. And then I finally was like, Listen to me, babe, you're going to have a bachelor party. You're not going to know when it's coming, but it's coming. And he's like, wait, what? Our schedule is so fucking busy to the wedding. This is basically the only weekend I have free. Little did Matt know. Okay, so. Little did Matt No. Okay, so, shout out Jason. Hello. So Jason is Matt's really good childhood best friend. And Jason texted me months and months and months ago, okay? And he was like, okay, I'm going I'm going to plan this Cabo trip. And I'm going to say my wife and I and you and Matt are going to go on a couples trip to Cabo. He does some cool job where he has clients that would give him these houses and stuff.

And so he's like, I'm going to tell him one of my clients gave us a house, and we're going to go to this house as a couples retreat, and it's going to be super fun, and it's going to be a nice relaxing weekend together. So this is in fucking December or November of last year, okay? And he asks us if we want to go, and he had already prepped me. So I was like, Yes, Jason, this is so fun. Yes, Matt, let's go. And Matt's usually like, You never want to leave the house. But like, Okay, great. Alex wants to go on a couples trip. So fun. So fast forward, he knew this couples trip was two weekends after my bacheloret trip. And he was like, But if we're going on that, and then the next weekend we're going to be here, and then the next weekend, we're going to be there, when is this bachelor trip happening? And he kept asking me, and I kept not telling him. So finally, it is the time for our couples trip, quotation marks, to Cabo. And I am fake packing the night before you guys. And I'm like, I'm shoving a fuck ton of stuff in the suitcase because I'm like, I'm just putting all my dirty clothes in there because I'm like, I'm so fucking messy.

If I pack I'm not going to pack right now. I'm never going to unpack for the fake trip that I'm fucking going on. So I'm shoving all of my dirty clothes into this luggage bag and I zip it up. And I'm like, fake, pretending to pack my skincare and stuff so Matt doesn't catch on because he knows exactly how I pack. And I'm faking having a panic attack packing because Matt also knows, oh, my God, this bitch is always a fucking nightmare packing. It's a it's a whole ordeal when Alex is packing and what should I wear? And so I'm texting him like, what should I bring? And like, how many dinners do you think we're going to? I'm not going on this trip, you guys. Okay? So it is the morning of his bachelor trip. It's 6:00 AM and the car arrives at our house. And Jason was in the car with Matt's brother, and they were going to basically pop out of the car and be like, the fucking bitch, let's go. And Matt has no idea they're in the car. And then they're going to drive him to LAX, and then the rest of all of his friends will be waiting for him at the airport.

So we're getting ready. We're getting the dog situated for he thinks someone's going to come watch our dogs. And we're bringing our bags down to the car. And he's like, okay, can you go take the boys inside? I'll just handle the bags. And he's like, close the door behind me. And he thinks I closed the door, but I actually am coming outside and I'm filming him. And I closed the door behind me, and I'm walking and walking. And Jason pops out of the car and is like, hey. And so at first Matt, you hear Matt, and he's like, Wait, you came all this way to pick us up? Because again, Matt thinks that Jason's wife is in the car. He's like, Oh, you guys picked us up. Okay, here, let's go on our couples trip. That was so nice of you. You didn't need to come all this way. And then all of a sudden, his brother comes around the car and is like, Get in. Let's fucking go. And Matt realizes as he's holding our suitcases, he's like, No, you got to be fucking kidding me. And we got him so fucking good. You guys, Matt is the planner.

Matt is the one that knows everything scheduling-wise. He handles everything. Matt never gets fucking punked. He never is surprised. And it was so fucking cute to see people do something for Matt for once. I feel like he's always doing shit for people. And it was so cute to see him, so shocked that we had all planned this behind his back. And he immediately is like, Are you fucking kidding me? And so then we go back inside, and then he's all frazzled because he's like, Did I pack enough for a boys trip? Like, oh, my God, what do I need? And it was so, so cute. And they took him away, and they went to Cabo for the weekend. And it just made me so happy because, again, he went with his childhood best friends, some of his new adult friends, and my brother went, which makes me so happy Matt and my brother are so close, and it's just the cuteest fucking thing. And my brother is the one that will be officiating our wedding. So Matt had a great time. I had a great time. And I I just feel so happy that we both did it right.

He was like, we literally went to bed at 10 o'clock every night, but we golfed, we drank, we swam in the pool. It was perfect. And it was just also nice to see him and I just both get to really spend some quality time with our friends before this wedding. Okay, I am going to answer some questions because I know so many of you have quite a few questions, and I really want to make sure that I'm doing my best to answer more specifics. Because I know that maybe my situation is not the same as your situation. So here we go. I have a lot of small girlfriend groups who don't all necessarily like each other or hang out ever? How do I throw my bachelor at inviting all my friends who I love and want there, but not worry about everyone getting along or even just having a good time? I don't want to be stressed about it, and I genuinely want everyone to have the best time ever, but I don't know what to do. I mean, that's really tough. I think there's a couple of things. Number one, if you want to invite everyone, I think the rooming situation is very important to just make sure the people that are friends with each other get to stay together.

I also think it's not on you to manage dynamics. If everyone has one person that they're close with, then they can all figure it out and make good for you and not make drama that weekend. And then the other option that I would suggest that I did is there is a world where you do one trip with maybe friends that don't live near you, and then the friends maybe that do live near you, go to fucking dinner and celebrate. A bachelorette doesn't need to be this destinational thing. And I think so many people get in their heads about that. It's okay to just Just go to a dinner or go to a girl spa day. And again, I know you don't want to break the bank. So you can go have a fucking picnic in the park, bring Rose with the girls from where you live, and then you could do a trip if you want for your actual bachelorette. But whatever makes you fucking comfortable. Stop trying to appease anyone else. This is about you. Okay. You aren't invited to a friend's bachelorette, but was planning on inviting her to yours six months apart.

What do you do? That's such a good question. Okay, my first bit of advice is, goes back to our last question. Maybe you're not invited because she's doing all of her childhood friends, or she's doing all these friends. Again, keep in mind, a lot of the times it's not personal unless you're the fucking cunt that's being mean, and obviously you're not getting invited. But a lot of times it's not personal, and just have some grace for the bride. This shit is so fucking stressful. And so I would say, if you didn't get invited to hers, I first would just ask you, do you have any idea why? And if it's because it's logistics, or it's the friend group that you don't know, that is like, okay, then still invite her to yours if you want her to be there. But if it's because you realize, oh, she doesn't see us as that we're that close, I think it really comes down to you sitting with yourself to be like, why did I want to invite her to mine? And if it's because you want to get closer with this person, don't be petty. Again, you could ask her also like, hey, I was thinking of inviting you to my bachelorette.

I obviously know I'm not coming to yours, and there's no hard feelings whatsoever. I just wanted to have a conversation with you of where you're at, and if we could just... Let's just catch up and talk about all this, because I know it's stressful on both of us. You could just open the door. But again, I don't have enough details of, does she maybe not like you? If you get the vibe that she doesn't like you, then maybe don't invite her back to your bachelorette, if she didn't invite you to hers. How many friends do you need for a fun bachelorette? What if it's just myself and my maid of honor? Bitch, thrive. I literally thrive. You need one person. You need one friend. You know what? Fuck it. I could take myself on a bachelorette and have a great fucking time. You do not need to have 10 plus girls at a bachelorette. You don't need to have 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. You need one fucking friend to have a good Bachelorette. And again, like I said at the beginning of this episode, a Bachelorette is whatever the fuck you want it to be.

I I love doing shit that's just like, why? We don't have to listen to the fucking rules. Make your own fucking rules up. And I think if you actually just think to yourself, if none of this goes on social media, Would I actually be totally fine just bringing my one friend? What are you so worried about with one friend? That you're going to look like a loser, that you only have one friend? Bitch, some people that have the 10-fucking person Bachelorette, there's not one fucking person in there that they're actually deep down, fucking close with and can go to. And if If you have one fucking person that is ride or die that you can fucking call in the middle of the night after you fucking killed someone, bitch, you're good to go. So I would just say quality always over quantity, and don't judge yourself. That sounds like a great fucking weekend. Zero drama. Go have fun with your maid of honor. Hi, father. I'm planning my bachelorette, and it's going to be in Miami, Florida. I have some friends that are wild like I am, and some friends who don't like to party.

How do I navigate planning events for a trip like Miami to include everyone and still have I don't want anyone to feel uncomfortable, but I still want to enjoy my bachelorette party and the way I envision it. Oh, my God. Can we please fucking talk about this? Okay, I'm going to get to your question, but let me just say this. I have not been to these, but I have heard of bachelorettes where there is a rule that you are not allowed to go to sleep before 12:00. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, counselor. Sorry, say that again. There are fucking rules that you can not go to sleep before a certain amount of time. This is insane. This is where I draw the line. Bitch, are you... Laura MacMullen would fail every time. Lauren, shout out. Love you. Lauren will fall asleep at the club, and we're like, let's take her home and tuck her in a bed. I'm Sorry, but that just seems so fucking insane. That feels like you are trying so hard to curate something that if people want to go to bed before 12:00, let them go to bed. Okay? What are you?

Like a tyrant. Let's chill. Let's let everyone do what they want to do. Bring them all to the club. And if they can't hang, it's okay if they leave. I'm sorry, but I think it's... I think when people make those rules, what I fear is that they're so insecure that they need to put stipulations in almost and guidelines to create this environment that just is not naturally going to happen. This is the thing. If you have to make that rule, it's because you know that people are going to go to sleep before 12:00. So let them. Why are you trying to be like, stick fucking tape on your eyelid, you cunt, and stay awake? What? So they're miserable? So they're staring at you like, take another shot, I fucking dare you. You fucking whore. I hate you. No, don't force people to do fucking anything, okay? So I would say to this question is, there are going to be friends that want to party, and there are going to be friends that don't want to party, and I think you can fucking say that. Do a cheers at the beginning of the weekend. I'm obsessed with all I love you.

All of you are here for different reasons. I love you all. Thank you so much for being so amazing and my best friends, and I can't wait to have a great weekend. The reality is, all of us are going to have different sleep schedules, drinking habits, you name it. We're all going to be a little all over the place. And so I want everyone to feel comfortable. Do what you feel comfortable. Let's just have a good fucking time. Everyone bring the good vibes and the energy. And it doesn't mean that you can only be fun if you drink. So let's fucking And when I say, let's rage, let's rage and let's have fun, let's laugh, let's talk, let's cry, let's hug, and let's have a good fucking energy time. It's not all based on drinking, right? So I would just say that, but I would just say, really try not to overthink it. People are going to leave the club if they want to leave the club, babe. You don't need to be like, you're allowed to leave. I would say one statement at the beginning of the weekend. And also, when someone's leaving the club, don't make them feel so awkward that they're having to sneak out.

Like, hug them and be like, I love you. We may be out till 4:00 or not. Love you. Good night. It's better to just let people do what they want to do. Because, again, like my mother said, back in the day when I was young and growing up and trying to understand dynamics, why would you want to be friends with someone that doesn't want to be friends with you? That was always the statement. Now it's applicable if you change a little bit, right? Why would you want someone to stay out late night if they don't want to stay out late night? Why would you want someone to do something that they don't want to do, right? They're not going to have a good time. So let them have the time that they want to have and support you and show up for you in the way that they want to show up for you. And if they don't show up for you and they are a negative Nancy, then that's also telling to you about your relationship with that person. But instead of trying to micromanage it, let your friends show their true colors, okay?

And again, these moments are very heightened. So I would also say be fucking gracious with people, because sometimes people are just their worst when they're in a house with a bunch of girls, they don't have their routine, they don't have their normal shit around them. It's going to be drama, right? So the more that you can just be chill about shit, I think it's going to go better. Okay, gifts for the girls. Everything I want to get them to show my appreciation for them attending ends up adding up to 2K. The trip is already such an extra cost in addition to paying for the wedding. Help a girl out, Big Al. Girl, I got you. Again, I think financially, it's already such a burden on everyone that is going, including you who has a fucking wedding coming up, which is the biggest fucking expense. What I would say is, handwrite cards. You don't need to get them these sweatsuits that you make them or these bracelets that you buy them. Write them each an individual handwritten card and talk about your relationship to them and how much you love them and appreciate them coming and how much it means to you.

That, to me as a friend, would mean so much more than a little gift bag. And if your friends think that that's lame, then I also think you need to reevaluate your friendships. Because to me, a handwritten note that I can keep for the rest of my life, I keep all of it in a shoe box, all of the handwritten notes that anyone in my life, from my parents, my siblings, my partners, anything. It's all in a box, and I've kept and I've cherished forever. And I think that, to me, is more meaningful. You don't need to get them a pair of fucking socks. They're going to lose them one day. So I think, again, it's not about money. It's about the thought. And so don't feel pressured financially to go above and beyond on something that it's like, hey, there's also a more meaningful way to do things. And yeah, and of course, if you can afford it, that's so cute. But I didn't get my girlfriends anything. We just raged all weekend, and we had a great fucking place to stay, and we skied, and we drank, and it was perfect. What are your opinions on joint bachelor/bachelorette parties?

Where all the men and women go out or on vacation together? It seems like it's more common now, and I would love to know if people think it's a good or bad thing. I think it's cute. I mean, I think that we... Matt and I talked about that for two seconds, but we were like, But that's what our wedding is going to be. Since our wedding is going to be pretty small, we just have all of our best friends coming and then our families. But we were like, let's just do our own thing. But in another world, I think that's totally cute. I think what I would say is assessing and being self-aware of who is on each side. Do you I have a lot of friends that have partners that aren't going to be in the other party, and those people have some... There's just worlds where it would be like, oh, this is awkward because None of my girlfriends are friends with any of his guy friends, and they're all going to meet this weekend, but all of them are... You just have to look at the situations and the logistics. But for the most part, I think it's a totally fun idea, and do whatever you want.

Again, I loved that I got to do some like a good small girls weekend, but I think that would be super fun. I think Matt and I just have a lot of moments that we do bring all of our friends, and we all go on trips. So I think it's like we wanted to just space it out and change it up. And since we're having the wedding, and it's small, like I said, I think. But yeah, I think that's great. Again, guys, do whatever the fuck you want. If you think it will be more fun to be with your guy, and everyone show up, and everyone be there, and have it be a full party because you know, Oh, our wedding is going to be so many fucking aunts and uncles and cousins and third cousins. Yeah, go party with all of your friends. I think, again, you cannot go wrong if it makes you happy and it's something that you wanted to do it. Closing remarks for my brides, I would say, The world does not revolve around you. And I understand that this is a really important time in your life. But as we all grow up and we are dealing with our own shit, you have to think about yourself in the roles reversed.

When your friend is getting married, I'm sure you're a great friend and you really care about them. But at some capacity, that is not your wedding and that's not your life. And so you have to be mindful that all of your friends are doing their best, but asking them financially and the amount of time that a bachelorette is and the efforts that they're going to to make it all happen and move their schedule around. Just be mindful of what you're asking and don't set your expectations too high. Also on that front, I will say there is a reality of I've seen so many DM's They're like, some of these fucking people are just asshole friends that are making you feel small and insignificant and aren't making you feel good. And what you're asking for is totally reasonable. This is the weekend. Do you mind getting your own flight? And again, to then those people, if you cannot afford that flight because it's not in your budget, call your friend and say that. And then a bride, if you get the call that your friend cannot afford it, you cannot be mad. If you actually know they can't afford it, if you know that they're literally going and getting bottle service by themselves in Miami, and they're like, Sorry, you can't make it to that.

You know what I'm saying? It's all relative. But just try to really have empathy that I understand that this day for us is so important, the wedding and the bachelorette, but it's not for everyone else. That's just the reality. They're going to have their own day. And also, again, like I said, they have probably 10 other fucking weddings and bachelorettes that they have to go to. And as much as you want to feel special, you will feel special. But the expectations need to just be adjusted it a little bit. Now, when it comes to the friends, I would just say there's ways to make your bride friend feel really special that does not have to break the bank. And again, I think social media can just completely warp the concept of what a cool bachelorette can be. There is no fucking need to spend thousands and thousands and thousands of dollars on decoration and all these things. It's okay if what your budget allows is not something you fucking see on Pinterest, okay? I would rather have good conversations with my friends and good times and laughs and cries than have a cool fucking blow up bull in the corner, okay?

We don't need to hump the bull. We can just sit here and have drinks and hump each other, you know? So Everything is relative, but I think when girls all come together, it can be a disaster if not planned right. And so I think communicating with everyone is my biggest, biggest, biggest bit of advice. Include everyone in the process as much as it can create a disaster beforehand a little bit, if you think, it will alleviate some of the issues and confusion and the frustration when you get there. Everyone is going to do what they want to do. Brides manage your expectations, bitch. But overall, I would say I know that a lot of people have... I could have filled my bachelorette with 10 people, but would I have had as much fun? No. And that doesn't mean I don't love my other friends that didn't come. But again, I'm going to make time to do things at a different time. I just knew I wanted something really intimate. And those three girlfriends of mine, we never really get to be all together. And it was so fucking meaningful. So Daddy Gang, I am so excited for my wedding.

I have I don't even have my dress, and we're a month out, but I'll tell that story another time. I don't have my dress. I am going to go try it on in a week, I think. So hopefully I like it. But other than that, I'm so excited give you guys wedding updates, and I'm going to film stuff at my wedding, and I'm honestly just going to try to decide if I want to share and when I want to share. But overall, I just... It's been a really, really fun experience. I hope you guys can enjoy. If you're going on a bachelorette, stop making people keep their eyes open and telling them, You can't go to sleep until after 12. Calm down. Absolutely calm down. No, I want to go to sleep. Sorry. Just be chill. Live and let live. Happy bachelorette year, Daddy Gang. Send me in your stories. I hope you guys have the best time, and I love you guys, and I hope you enjoyed this episode, even though it is stressful, have fun with it because you do it once. Hopefully, you do it once. Okay, Ily. Bye..