Transcribe your podcast
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Sometimes people say, I don't know, I don't I don't know, and I go, what would you buy it again? And they're like, Mike, drop boom. No, you know, like that's the big. Yeah. Would you put your money on it again? No.

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Hi, guys. Welcome back to another episode of Girl's Got to Eat. Welcome back. Coming to you live from Four Seasons Total landscaping. Can we please host an event there? I think they're booked to write a listener. She said, I used to work at this event space across the street and I got fired. Me and my friends got fired. I was like, OK, I don't know what you guys did. She was to get over there tomorrow just like that and get a new event space just to check out the new events.

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I want to have a girl's got to eat event there. Yeah. And guys, we're recording like pretty early out, like almost a week out. So if this isn't funny anymore, I'm sorry. It's going to be funny to me for literally everything.

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But every day, every day, every time, wake up crying about it, go to bed, think about it. I, like you, will text me like if you heard about this Four Seasons. So I'm like the Internet. All I do is think about this, ok, are we OK? Thank you.

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Our partners, we brought back a partner or so I'm just going to cry. Walked in and said We have this brand today and I screamed, OK, this is thanks to bad before girls got it.

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OK, I've been happy about is a woman's lifetime subscription box filled with full size premium beauty, lifestyle, fitness, home and wellness products sent straight to your doorstep. Each season, every box is created specifically for you. The winter box is on sale now to get ten dollars off your first box use coupon code, get fab fund dotcom and things to ship station for supporting girls. Got to eat no matter where you're selling Amazon Etsy, your own website ship station brings all your orders into one simple interface, making them really easy to manage from any device, even your cell phone.

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Use our offer cogie to get a 60 day free trial. Yes, and thanks to Daily Harvest's for supporting Girl's Got to eat daily harvest is a lifesaver. Daily harvest makes it easy to eat clean, undeniably delicious food no matter what your day brings. Keep it simple. Go to Daily Harvest Dotcom and enter GGGI to get twenty five dollars off your first box. And thanks to quip for supporting girls got to eat go to get quip dotcom sorgi to get your first refill free get QIP Dotcom soggy quip better oral health made simple and rewarding and I'm excited talk with this little Flosse thing.

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I'm flosses love the last Flaxman Fosset announcements. Yeah. Do you want to you do I feel like we know we know you. We live our truth. Tickets for the virtual holiday stupid livestream show are on sale. Get these tickets for Sunday, December 13th. Could not do it. We've done these crazy elaborate holiday spectaculars for the past two years and we were like, we have to do this again. So we're going to do the absolute best we can to make it spectacular.

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And you guys can stream it live starting at 9:00 p.m. Eastern Time. We do it a little bit later as the people on the West Coast don't have to start getting their charcuterie ready at four p.m., they're getting drunk at 4:00 p.m. So get tickets, go to Girl's Got to Eat podcast dotcom and then click on what is it to watch live shows. And right at the top, you will see it. Get your ticket. If you haven't joined us on a live stream before, we you will just get a unique code that is nontransferable and then you'll log in.

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You can measure it to a TV, you can watch it on your devices. We'll talk about it more as it nears. But you can get the tickets now. Yeah, I'm glad you brought the website because a lot of you been asking somebody asked us the other day, I would love to see an episode about the love languages. And I was like, oh, we've done that. So if you guys ever want to see an episode about something, just go to our website.

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You can search it. Every episode we've ever done is on there, so find it on there. Don't insult us. Why? People are like, can you talk about dating politics and your family? The day we released an episode on it, I'm like, if you don't listen to the episode before you do me, I swear to fucking God they just don't know. They don't have anyone. People are like, can you talk about this? And like, we literally did that today.

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If you're like, can you talk to your fiancee leaving you?

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Like, I literally talk about it every episode. It's every episode. He left me like six years ago. I'm still talking about it's still out here. The most surprising things, I mean, like a season is it's like right now I've had two girlfriends since then. Please stop, OK?

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My ex is there like I married and my wife's a fan and I hate this. You know, that is my fucking dream for my exes to date.

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Fans of the podcast. It's my dream. Number one, you already heard we talk so much shit on that person. Yeah, well, it's every day. I hope that this happens. So funny. You guys sent me a meme. Then she said, I just want to congratulate my ex's new girlfriend on giving up orgasms.

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Congratulations, girl. Girl, that is how all my exes, none of them are good at all. It's my very serious exes. None of them are going to talk about that is so awesome. Yeah. OK, you want to talk about the really quick speaking just a. Orgasm over you guys have stormed the merch store, we have sold more merch in the last week than we ever sold before. Interesting. We had a female designer and then we built our own, which hired some men.

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It's great. It's it's gorgeous. You guys been sending it as gifts. You've been Instagram storing it like crazy. This watchers are the softest, cutest, especially the crop sweatshirts, just like flying off the shelves. Yeah, they're so great. The hats I like I love a crewneck, you know, I love a pink. Have we been selling pink crewneck sweatshirts out of the pink crewneck? Yes. And it goes out the pink here next.

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Go very fast. OK. One of the things that ships the quickest do we mugs. Do we know because they're selling out the door the Monday to do list Miles. Yes, I love them all. So you guys scoop those up. Also, since Dewey came up, that reminds me of something I was totally remiss to mention last week. I can't believe I forgot to say it, and that is that we have dogs back at the White House and we have the very first ever rescue dog in the White House.

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I know. So Joe Biden's dogs are major and champ. And Major is the first shelter pet to reside in the White House.

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That's how, you know, Joe Biden's a good guy. Well, Donald Trump was like one of the only presidents to never have a dog. I can't imagine him with an animal or a child ever. And that's like we're not that today is on a political episode. We are so excited to bring you a bunch of other content, even though you guys really love the episode last week. But I forgot to say that we're so excited to have dogs back in the two dogs.

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One's a shelter, pet adopt, don't shop. And on that note, I just have to say this. We're recording this on Tuesday before Monday. So kind of far out. So yesterday, which was a full week ago. Now, at this point, if you guys are listening, I had posted this like Lokey Tharp's trap of Dewey and then some girl kind of she tagged me in a story that was like the same pose was. And then I was just posted like, fuck it, tag me and your dogs there.

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Strops people went nuts, OK? Oh, you just have these sexy pets. I did. I had to do something real. I recorded actually Gavins podcast with her, who's a former guest of ours, and I was like uncommunicative for a few hours. I came out of that recording. You had a thousand Instagram stories like that. I was like, what is happening? What did I miss? And they they were all fire. And there were hundreds more that I couldn't post.

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And I'm so sorry. And I told people like, I'm sorry I couldn't get to all these. They were cats, too. Just incredible content. And you guys were firing them out quick. I was like, send me your thoughts, Trappes. Done and done. Like you have them on your camera. Roll your dogs just out here, looking back at it, being sexy as fuck. I was like desexing cats, cats blocks. Rayna, did you know Amy Chan has these two cats?

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They are Persian Maine Coon mixes. Oh, my God. You said mangku. And I felt it through my whole body. She tagged me in third shop. There's two of them. They look so mean and sexy. I was like, they look me and I love it. Like they look like they're going to murder you and your sleeve. It's like so sexy. They look like. I see. Yeah. I love a mangku but mixed with a Persian.

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I just. So you see this thought. Oh yeah. Yeah that's I feel like I would like these cats. Are you turn on like I was a little but anyway thank you for sending me your dog there.

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Straps are. Oh and one more quick thing and I want to kick it to you. You have some stuff to talk about. I know I said I had this date last week. It's tonight as we were caught. So sorry to bother you again. But next week, maybe it's tonight happened tonight. And our guest today is going to dress me for it. We have a style episode today. Our friend Lillian Charles is the guest, and she dressed me last night and she's dressing me tonight.

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She has such a gift. It's crazy. She just goes into the closet and put stuff together. I never would've thought of some exciting stuff she picks out for her for date night. I am, too. I'm going to sit here, an Instagram story out for all of you guys. Perfect. OK, three things to tell you. First of all, I just I feel like I'd be remiss to not throw in as a caveat to the CNN Zadig conversation.

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I forgot you. Sure. Now, do you know who that is? I don't know. He's like he's wandering the daylight and he looks like Jake Tapper a little bit. He looks like a more polished Jake Tapper. He's a little less snarky. We left him out. I got to show you his photo. He's hot. OK, also, Don Lemon, people were like, what about Don? I'm like, we love I love me some Don Lemon right now while we're here.

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OK, he is just you know, it was hot looking. Why am I look OK? You know who he kind of looks like, though? Jake Tapper. Jake Tapper looks like Nick Saban. And someone said it, and I can't unsee it and I'm upset. Do you know Nick Saban is now going to look at him like he's the Alabama football coach? So being a Clemson girl, not a fan, but I did want to say this.

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I read this before Chris Cuomo and Don Lemon remind me so much of me and you. They come on like late night and they just start, like, making fun of each other, shooting the shit. They're laughing and they're smiling like they remind me so much. I mean, you if we were to pick our like, are you now are you gonna say I. I think I'm done. I'll give you that. I think I think you're close.

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Yeah, I'm OK. Good. I'm glad we agreed. Yeah. He I can see Chris crying a lot while Van Jones is the crier. Don't get it twisted. OK, I lied. We've done we have guys I like talking about how hot these guys are. Also I would just like to announce I am back to masturbating.

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I kind of got we did break during election week. I just I've been really depressed and anxious, not depressed.

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It's like the wrong where I've been anxious and stressed out. And I feel like is this interesting thing to me. What's this enjoyable thing to me? That's what I take. Masturbation. I just feel like it like brightens your day and everybody should be doing it every day and it would make your day better. But I'm having a bad day. I don't want to do it. It's hard for me to get into a sexy place. OK, and so you're saying day like day.

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I do it at night. All day. Yeah. Yeah, I do masturbate. I nightime masturbate and daytime masturbate. It's just different vibe. Yeah. It just depends what music. The other night I was getting sexy pics to somebody who I'm going to talk about the second and I like forgot to masturbate before I went to sleep. I woke up with like four thirty in the morning. I was like one words do this. Yeah. Well I realized that I didn't masturbate.

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I do it usually before I go to bed and then I call them up and take a little of my feels and I'm good to go. I didn't do it the whole week until we knew who won the election. I don't think I think it was just because I was staying up, going to bed at three, four in the morning every night. And I just was like, I'm too tired. And then I like was like, I have to masturbate all week.

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And then it's like one bite and one like that night I was like, I really got it. And it freed up all the creative space in my mind. I think about this anymore. And it's like I just kept like fantasizing about all the CNN anchors. Chris Cuomo, I could masturbate to him all day. Yeah, his body is crazy. And like him, like I mean, I think he's very attractive, but him like younger, like the pictures of him, like younger and shirtless, like it's I would just watch that guy I masturbate to watching him work out.

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I said masturbate. Weird. I just got to see their dad because like they're both. And he was also a politician, right? Yeah. I think they're like some people don't like the Cuomo family, but at least that they're not. You can masturbate to them if you don't like them. Yeah, I'm abstract. People don't like all the time like my exes. That's that's what I mean. Is it better. It's better to hate masturbate.

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I m.. Hey, I asked your neighbor for Mr. Brady and I said you've been funny lately.

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I'm not sure you slept the man and keep rolling. OK, speaking of my ex that I masturbated to, you guys know him as the one who doesn't have a family because I've actually had eye contact with Ryan right now. Actually frequently brings up that he doesn't have a family. I'm his family, Ashley. No, because we're family. That means he's my cat. He's not my ex. Haven't done anything to you. Yeah.

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So I was on the phone with him the other night.

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We still talk every once a week or something. And he we were talking about how I had to go to the doctor and he I need to see a cardiologist high blood pressure because I'm ninety. So he told me I have to go. And he was like bothering me about it a lot. And I was like, what is your problem? He's like, I love you a little bit. And so a man told me he loved me a little bit this week.

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And he also proposed a couple of months ago, like this guy had real oh, this was this. I started thinking about like the weirdest way.

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And somebody has told you that they love you, like for the first time are like the words where I've said it to somebody because like I mean, also, like, I did the right thing. I followed that up with a new of me with my my hand in my underpants like that. Like miming, masturbating. Why are you laughing?

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You said, yeah, I was so hot and he loves me a little bit.

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I have a little bit of a little spurt. When you texted me that I lost it, I choked on my coffee. Sometimes I tell you something and I'm choking, laughing because it's so absurd. I forgot to tell you I was also like a bottle of wine deep. You know, I have my nights, you know, I'm a nightmare one of those nights. Yes. But I started thinking, like, the first time I told somebody I love them or they told me like my of my serious exes.

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One of them told me during sex and he said, I looked like I was going to throw up and I just never set it back for, like, weeks. I don't know. It scares you sometimes. Yeah. Another one. We were in my room and he threatened to he told me, let me threaten to kick all my shoes over if I didn't say back to him, you know how serious I am about the apartment organizations. He knew how to get me threatened.

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You threaten me to kick off my shoes ever. That's insane. Not physically threatening me, but yeah, so I set it back and I've told two guys I love them during sex by accident. It happened twice. This guy. I love you a little bit. Talked about it is so embarrassing. And you just listen, girls, if you've ever done it, just. Yeah, we've all done rolling right along. You keep it right. Keep it moving.

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I think that those are the weirdest ways I've said it or had it said to me, but nothing else crazy. I haven't had anything too crazy. I remember an accident like the day we said I love you. We were like walking out the door and he had he looked looked really hot. He had just had on like jeans, like a black T-shirt. And I said, like I said, I love you in a black T-shirt. Like casual.

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Yeah. And he was like, what was that? And it got so awkward. Like I was like, what he was like, what do you say? I was like, what do you say? And then we actually said, I love you for the first time that night.

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And it was a really special moment. And then we argued about who said at first I still like jokingly argued, I still am like not totally sure. He definitely did. It was like at the same time, I don't know, it somehow happened in conversation. I feel like I kind of blacked out a little. And then but then we were like, yeah, we've been loving each other for a minute. I've been loving like I said, I was like, I love you and I'm so excited to tell you because I've been I'm sick of screaming in my head for weeks now at this point.

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Did he say it after. But you said I love you in a black shirt. What did he say at first later that night? Like that was before we did this day thing. And then we went to dinner and then we came home. We were laying on the couch and it happened. It was it was special in the sex after that. Oh, the sex after that is amazing.

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Like, if you like, I would say at that point I feel like I could pinpoint when I fell in love with him and it was probably like a few weeks prior. So it's like you are just like screaming it in your head, you know what I mean? And hoping it doesn't come out. I'm hoping it doesn't come out. I'm like praying to God. I don't actually. So that's why I usually just date guys that I'll never love.

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Yeah, it's never happens. And I've heard that the other guy, I talked about him, this is not a guy tropical staycation in the apartment guy. He said like, I love you. And like it made me realize, like, I don't want to be together anymore. But this was after so many years. So we were like hugging. We're on the Clemson campus. We had just like stuck in my old dorm. We were having this amazing time.

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And here we were like in this hug. And he was like, I love you. And I was like, thank you.

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You know, I think I, I it it was just a I think I said like always have a special place in my heart or something like God. Oh my God. And then he jumped off a bridge and that was the last time I saw him. Because you jumped on that bridge. Yeah, because he died. There's people that like I definitely like love that I will never be in love with, like my DC acts like we're just never in love.

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I told him recently that I love him, but I was like I was like, I have love for you. Like I'm not in love with you, like ever. I never I never ever will be ever. So we're clear. But I love him very much like he's been my life for a long time. And I think that's probably how I feel about this guy too, like the one that told me he loves me a little bit, like I love him a little bit.

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He's been in my life for a long time. I love him a little. We're not like in love with each other. Yeah, but like, I care about him very much. Yeah. Because I'm his family. You're your own family. He's not in our family. Yeah. I don't throw I love you around too much. A lot of people say it to friends all the time, like I've been doing it more and I'll say it back if someone says it to me.

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But some people say it a lot like to to their friends. No shade at all. Some people really throw it around and I don't throw it around so much. Do I throw it around a lot. I'm not sure. Like because I don't know. We would know, we would say it. But like some people say, it's like more casual friends, you know what I mean? Like, that's kind of how they, like, end the conversation.

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I'm like like I hear people say it like I've had people say, like, I love you and I'm like, I don't not there yet with you. Odd. Some people just toss it around and sit around. I mean, I just feel like you and I have a lot of really close friends that I really, really love, like very much like very deeply. I have a lot of I mean, I'm in my thirties. I have a couple of friends of a Yeah.

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I and a lot of conversations with Libero. Yeah. But those are people that it isn't like weird if they said to me. Yeah. And I feel like it's like you've had like a really great night doing something and you're kind of like saying goodbye to your friends in the street and you're like love you, you know, like after like a great day, like about I feel like we were like love you.

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Like what everybody was leaving the apartment. I was like, I love you. I love you.

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As long as there's like a block in between you guys like a whole. I'm like, don't try to hug, don't cry here and don't come back here and don't look me in the eye. Usually they'd be fired up down the street. They can't touch you. Yeah, I'll say I love you to friends if we're like but arm's length. I'll tell you at Christmas time. Yeah. OK, we'll celebrate Christmas. Right. Well that's how we'll end the year.

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OK, but speaking of Christmas ad, what about the level of about the pop? If we are going to talk about some of our partners before we bring Lily in, I am so excited to talk to you guys about the Fab Four fun Winterbourne.

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They're back. We love them. The box is incredible. I know I say this every season, but it is the best one. I posted this robe in my Instagram stories. Why did so many of you ask me what? Your robe, it looks perfect, the color is perfect, like it looks so cozy, it was in the Fatfat phone box, so we're just crazy and it's like it's kind of like Misty laying like it's not a full-length robe, it's tan color.

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It's a summer and rose cozy robe. The retail price is seventy dollars. So that right there is more than the box itself right there. And so again you can cost I didn't even say this, but I'll tell you for the first time that you customize your box, you really get what you want in it. So this box so customizable. I'm going to tell you what I chose. I chose the summer and rose cozy robe. Like I just mentioned.

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I chose a mirror and I'm loving this brand. Murad I only know about it from private funds. I'm using their vitamin C cleanser. I got to have the A box and then this is the thing I chose this time. Murad Rapide, collagen infusion. Amazing way to discover new brand. I know size bottles. Laura Geller cinnamon and spice eyeshadow palette. Remember I said my eyeshadow pallet broke in Nashville, picked one out. In fact the phone box.

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Perfect. It's my exact color scheme. Cinnamon spice. You can take your guesses like what colors those are. I got this. Oh my gosh. This Tullah skincare rose glow and get it cooling and brightening. Ibom you just put on your eyes, your eyes like brighten up immediately. You can do it under or over makeup and then cutting boards because you know, we're cooking all the time. And then there is a few other things too. But those are some my favorite.

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There are some scrunches, there is some some blush eyeliner. Oh. And the get well nail recovery treatment by London town obsessed with that too. Didn't even say. What about the fun is it's a seasonal subscription box and you get all these items in the box again. They retail for more than the box actually cost you and you're going to discover all these new amazing products. The day the fab, the phone box comes as what is the best day like to open up and see all these incredible things.

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Rayna loves it, too. We are just so obsessed. So that's what I'm so obsessed with for the winter season. Get it for yourself. Get it for someone else is a gift. Cannot recommend it enough. Get a few boxes, split them up, use them for stocking stuffers like whatever it is. No, see, there's no season better than right now to get a vapid phone box. They're passionate about showcasing amazing women and female founded businesses.

[00:21:30]

Sixteen female founded brands are in the winter box this season. Sixteen female of brands. Oh my gosh. And there are some there's charity components, too, and we just can't get enough of them. We cannot recommend them enough. So we are giving you guys a deal. Obviously, Fabric Fund is a seasonal subscription box with full size beauty, fitness, fashion and lifestyle products. It retails for forty nine ninety nine but always has a value of over two hundred dollars.

[00:21:54]

Use coupon code for ten dollars off your first box at Fatfat Fun Dotcom. That's cogie for ten dollars off your first box at Fatfat. Fun Dotcom. Ten dollars off your first fab fit fun box. Do not post about this and not Tagus also get it. You're my favorite thing is get it and you just dole it out as gifts. Yeah, all that. Plus here's what I say. Get one for yourself. Get one that. Yeah I can get that robe.

[00:22:17]

Get that under I glow. Oh my God. Make them stop you seven. I got five of them last year. So obsessed. OK, ok speed. Something that I'm obsessed with reading about flossing today is actually a very popular with this thing. I love flossing so. OK, so you guys heard about to talk about quick before and their electric toothbrushes that are so beautiful and they have time. Sonic vibrations. You can personalize your routine. There's nine premium brush colors go off.

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Colors is a tough one. I hate myself plus anti-gravity toupees. They have meant they watermelon. But we're going to have a flossing today. OK, first of all, if you are not on these streets flossing, your breath stinks. I've said it before. I said again, if you're not flossing, your breath stinks and quip has a great flossing solution for you guys. OK, so, you know, clap through the electronic toothbrush, but they have a sleek reusable floss pick.

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Do you want to use over and over again? First of all, it's portable. You can take it anywhere. It is. So she is my I don't have in my hand but it's like rose gold. Rose Rose. You got that. We will buy anything. Rose gold. Of course I did. It will literally fit anywhere you take it with you. Like if you were on like a date and you're like, oh shit, something's like in my tooth like we're going to pick up a knife and just stick it there.

[00:23:35]

No, you got these reusable floss, OK? It's always like the flosses in this thing and then it's got the little pick and then you attached, I mean, whatever, you'll figure it out but handle teeny tiny thing. It's a small it's like an air pod case. Yes. And you just throw it in the bag. It's so good for flossing on the go. It's durable handle, it's reusable. It restringing with a KLECK. So it's like completely brainless.

[00:23:57]

It just like basically does it for you. It comes this compact mirror dispensing case. A single ripple pod replaces over one hundred and eighty single use plastic Flossie's. So it's good for the environment as well, which is amazing. You're not just throwing these things out constantly and then the refillable string expands to clean so we can say in and out, honestly, you should like accessorize and make your make your teeth brushing fashion. Yeah. Get the toothbrush that you can.

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You have the competitive toothbrush like I love, I love all black. You can just make sure you're flossing when you should be brushing the right amount of time, like all this stuff like. Law quip, you're going to love it. We're obsessed with it and they deliver brush ads, floss and toothpaste repels every three months from five dollars. Shipping is free. You can save money. You can skip the store, bring delight to your everyday brushing and join over five million mouths brushing with Web starting at twenty five dollars.

[00:24:50]

OK, and we're going to give you guys a discount. So right now, if you go to get quip dotcom sluggy, you will get your first refill free. That's your first revo free Atget quip dotcom sluggy spelled out get qip dot com sluggy quip better oral health made simple. Yes, we bring in someone else has beautiful teeth, beautiful style, beautiful everything from the ground up. Yes. We are really excited to have a friend of ours in the house studio with us in Duey.

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She is a personal stylist, a wardrobe counselor and a master energy healer from Atlanta that has been featured in Forbes CNN and was recently named the number one personal stylist by Atlanta magazine of her 2020. She is a good friend of Ashley's, now a good friend of mine. Please welcome to the show, Lillian Charles. So excited she has been dressing me her whole time here. She's like, you can't wear that. But like, in a loving way, you know?

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Yeah, that's my sister says in a nice manner. So, yes, we want to help you. And then rain is going to ask you what gives you the right.

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Actually, it's like my life, but I was like rain. Always ask you what gives them the right? You ask people what gives them the right. Now it's your line. OK, so well. But I. Yes. So I've been working with you like in you know, officially and unofficially like for years. Yeah. We've been friends for years. But in terms of like the styling stuff started with that Club Monaco. Yes. And I just I love that this is like a girl's got to eat moment.

[00:26:29]

And I knew you'd help me before I knew how talented and how amazing you are. But, you know, it was more just like you were. You give me advice here and there. Like, I feel like I wasn't like a client client. I was your friend. And our very first live show at Caroline's on September 12th. Twenty eighteen. I will never forget I had this whole look I wanted to do. I was like going to be like a high waisted track pant with a slit or with slits and then like a bodysuit, whatever.

[00:26:54]

It doesn't matter. It all showed up. I had multiple things that I ordered and different sizes from revolve. Everything showed up, nothing fit, nothing looked good. And I was like, I need help. It's a day before the show, the day before the show. And Lily was like, she sent me this thing, this romper from Club Monaco and was like, Just what do you think of this? And I was like, Bitch, what?

[00:27:15]

Anything. Not even close, and she were like, listen, hear me out, just go see if they have it. A Club Monaco just go tomorrow. I know there's one in New York you set me like I was. I know where they are. I know. And you, like, just go see if they have it. I put it on my body. I was like, I'll take it in black and red. I got the high, I had my high boot and it was the best look I ever still have to the state.

[00:27:36]

I wore that romper a whole lot. I bought it at multiple shows and then it just like from then on changed the way I looked it like the way that I needed to dress on stage and I mean in life to like you've helped me tremendously. We talked about this at dinner last night. We had dinner with you. And there's a difference between, like being able to, like, throw on a pair of jeans, look cute and having, like a look at you.

[00:27:55]

One hundred percent, you help people actually, like, create a look. And you've built an amazing business almost a decade running in business for yourself. She turns nine tomorrow. So you guys, you're listening. You're into the tenth year tomorrow. Oh, my God. I know. Well, that's insane. Incredible.

[00:28:12]

You know, I told a girlfriend that last year and she took me to dinner and she's like, happy ten years. I was like, no, no. Like, I'm coming up on ten years. It's like, OK, also. Trent Reznor, thank you. Happy tenth year. Yeah. Yeah. In the tenth year. So we're ushering in a, you know, the tenth year, which feels really good. Yes. We love to see it.

[00:28:30]

OK, and then one more thing. This is going to be all about me and you, but it's just a story that I wanted to share because it's topical. One of our friendship dating related moments was, ah, we were on a date, you and I, around you and I. We were on our second date, second friend date. We'd only met one other time. And Lillian is telling me about this guy. And she said, I know this guy and I don't know what came over me.

[00:28:51]

I just said, he's just not that into you. She was like, he doesn't give a fuck. I just was like, he's not you are that friend. But in terms of me, he doesn't deserve you. And you give it up and he's not giving you what you need. And like you, you're younger than me. You're a few years younger than me. I was probably twenty five that we were twenty five. Yeah. And this guy was like thirty four and a total bachelor.

[00:29:11]

Everybody knows who he is. He'd been running around and I was like, well like I still to this day like I have never slept with this guy, but he would call me for years, like years and years and years. I was like, OK, obviously I'm special but like no, he was doing it to everyone, dated a friend of mine. Like, I had a little background. He was a guy we're not going to name names, but everybody knew this guy was like that.

[00:29:31]

He was involved and everybody knew him. He's tall, he's hot, he's hot. Ebola chic is what I used to call him. Like they signed up on you. And you're telling me this?

[00:29:39]

I'm just sitting there like, am I going to am I going to tell her to give this up like I did? Always felt like I was a little bit older sister to you. Yeah. So I just said it and I was like, we may never be friends again. And it just like brought us closer together in that moment. I think that you were like, yeah, yeah. I was like I think I said something like, I really appreciate that.

[00:29:59]

I don't think that I take it too far. No, and I was like, no, you're probably right. Yeah. And then we'll say he just loves attention, you know? And then the day that we met was I'll just say we cried at Flywheel. We sure did. So our friend Kara Weaver, who are happy to fly, Will, but she was an instructor. She played this Coldplay fix you Beyonce say, what's the Beyoncé song it goes with?

[00:30:23]

Say my name, say my name. So, oh, God, it's called Fix My Name. If you Google it, I think it might be on SoundCloud or something. I post on Instagram before and she played it during this class. I forget what I was going through. We never met. We never met. And Lillian and I after class, Kara was like, I want you two to meet. And we were like competing against each other in that class too, like.

[00:30:42]

Oh, right. Because I used to be on the board. Yes. So we're like I was I don't do that shit at all anymore. But I used to be a board person. Me too. So we were probably like going back and forth, like, who is this bitch in the top slot? And we walked out and I was like, Lilly and Ashley, I've been wanting you to to meet. And we met and then we we realized that we had both cried in that class during this song.

[00:31:00]

So it became more like friendship song. And we were like, you know, we have bracelets and tattoos. They match.

[00:31:04]

You found your people. He was wanting to be like you guys being close to us. Yes. You found your behind you crying because your dad put the song on Instagram.

[00:31:14]

Guys, we first get into, like, how what what gives you the right how did you get into this? How did you become the style icon and pass on to others?

[00:31:24]

Yeah, well, first and foremost, I like to tell people that my business is really about love and authenticity.

[00:31:31]

I was a women's studies major in college and so I never studied fashion. So like, you know, I sometimes I'm like, oh, what does give me the right? But it's really this love for women and seeing women, like, blow up at every stage and every age, no matter what their budget is, what their body is like, how many kids they've had, how many kids they have not had, you know, where they are in their career, where they're on their relationships.

[00:31:52]

Like I tell people that I'm a professional cheerleader, like I cheer on people for I go, yeah, professional hype girl. So I love being in women's corners. I was thinking that I wanted to go into midwifery, which is how you say that the profession of midwifery I was I was about to get somebody that could be like someone. I feel like people just want what they want. I'm sorry, what is midwifery, midwifery, midwifery, whatever you like with like periphery.

[00:32:23]

So, yeah, it was like talking about smelling stuff, midwifery, a midwifery. It's so funny to know you and just picture you as like a baby deliverer. Like I get like, you know, are you in the E.R. you're like Ilford and you're like you're playing rap music like. Yes, yes. Oh yeah. So yes, I did an apprenticeship at Grady, which is like the public hospital downtown in Atlanta. I'd worked in clinics through college and I did a mission trip in Africa.

[00:32:52]

And I was like, something is missing. Like I love working with women. I love like hearing women stories and like how literally how they feel about their bodies, how they feel about themselves. But I'm not getting to do anything creative. So while I was doing my prerequisites to go back to school, I started telling this jury nine and a half years ago that was like the first thing I did was July 2011. And my mom was like like Tupperware sales, like you're going to be like trunk shows.

[00:33:19]

And I was like, listen, I'm going to be really good at this. So just like, give me a second. You know, and I was number one in sales in Georgia and like four months. And I was like, I'm telling you, there's something there's something to this. There's something. Yeah. Talking to women at trunk shows when they're like, I could never pick this out. I don't know how to put any of this together.

[00:33:35]

All of this looks stupid on me. I couldn't pull this off. And it was a lot of just really negative self talk. Every trunk show was like that. It wasn't like, oh, I'm amazing. And I was like, oh, like, we right. We have to rearrange the conversation here. And so I started just offering and being like, I can help you, I can help you with this. It's really interesting. I love that you also had the the confidence, the bravery to say to your parent, I'm just give me a minute, because, like, I think that, like with the podcast or with social media, like you and I used to bash and I used to have, but still do a big social media accounts, I think some people could look at and be like, what's what are you going to do with that?

[00:34:10]

It's like, just give me one minute. Yeah. And I will prove it to you. Yeah. You know, so I love that you said that. I love the attitude. Yeah. And my parents have been amazing cheerleaders. I mean, they're very much like you're on your own. Yeah. But they and my siblings I have an older sister and a younger brother and they're both like cheerleaders. I know they're both hotties. So I started taking pictures of my mom every time I went home from Atlanta to Myrtle Beach, South Carolina.

[00:34:35]

And I would be like, let's do your closet. And so I started making look books for people and then I would take that binder of photos. I mean, this is nine years ago, like before everyone was keeping loads of pictures on their phones and stuff. And so I would take that binder of photos to trunk shows and be like, I can I can do this for you and I can help you also clean out your wardrobe and I mean women.

[00:34:57]

And then, like on my service page, it was like a website, but it was in a binder. Yeah. And I was just like, I know, I know the original lookbook. Yeah. And so people were like, I could totally use this and started gifting it to other people as a service, you know, their sisters, their coworkers. And then I started speaking at like local, you know, mom's clubs and women's organizations and stuff like that.

[00:35:20]

So kind of word got out and. Yeah, so it's just grown. It's been very organic. It's been super organic. And now I, I saw virtually with women all around the country and some of the listeners that I just love so much, I want to shout out every single one of you guys because I'm so thankful for y'all one. Yeah, you've done a lot of cool things in your business as technology has advanced you like I like a virtual closet with you and you just like throw stuff in there and I get to like, Mark if I bought it or if I didn't or didn't like it or whatever.

[00:35:48]

So it's like. Yeah, like as technology advances, you are so able to reach so many more people. Yeah. Also in all this to you were like a fitness instructor, like you've done a lot, like your whole brand is very cohesive and like helping women with their bodies and not a like be skinny and be pretty like it's helping you. Feel strong and powerful and empowered. Yeah, totally, yeah, I think I always say, like, we're basically walking around magnets and so every time we show up somewhere, we're like magnetizing what it is that's inside of us.

[00:36:19]

And so if shitty things keep showing up like you, at some point you do have to take a look and be like, OK, well, how am I showing up? Like, who am I spending time with? You know, just like you guys always say, who am I spending time with? How am I showing up physically? Like where what city am I in? Do I want to be somewhere else? And like, taking the time as a person is taking the time to ask yourself the important questions.

[00:36:39]

So that's really what I do in my sessions, is like kind of get down to the bottom of how you want to show up. So it's like personal therapy and then you're like, we're going to make you also look pretty with your father. Yeah, but you probably choose better.

[00:36:51]

You know, we're going to get a job, but I bet you have people really I mean, like you confide in your hairdresser, like how they know everybody's secrets. Like I bet people when you're in their closet helping them and talking to them about their body and they're you know, you're talking about whatever else is going on in their life. I bet you people really like like breakthroughs with you. Yeah. Like you were dishonest about a woman that just had you over basically so she could cry with you.

[00:37:14]

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's definitely a deep dive. And I think that everything in our closet is a metaphor. And that's why a lot of people are like, you would be so embarrassed if you saw my closet. And I'm like, OK, well, like closet aside, like what would I what are you embarrassed about? Because it's not yes, it's about the clothes, but the clothes are all just like a bunch of symbols hanging out there.

[00:37:34]

And that's why I love the closet cleansing process, because I'm like, these are just symbols that don't resonate anymore. So let go of them and it's OK. Permission to remove. Yeah. Release. Well, we are just going to take a very quick break and then we're going to get to all the stuff. We have so many fun things that we're discussing with the today, but we just are going to finish talking about our partners for this episode.

[00:37:55]

I am going to start and tell you guys about ship station. OK, so the holiday season is here. Holiday shoppers are buying more stuff online than ever before. If you are an online seller or you are thinking about starting any sort of online store and you're struggling to keep up, you have got to get your ship together with ship station. I was not ready for that. I love it. OK, so yeah, when you're signed online, you're getting a massive amount of orders out quickly.

[00:38:20]

Can be tough with shipping carriers. Should you use are you getting the best rates, will it be delivered in time. I have felt these struggles for so many years. We still talk about shipping all the time we've immerge store. But like years ago I was, I was selling margin. It was just like always such a thorn in my side of, like, the best shipping carrier, my giving the customers the best shipping rates. Because us small businesses are not Amazon, we can't offer free two day shipping like it's just not realistic.

[00:38:44]

So you don't want your customers paying so much in shipping, you want them to get your products and what you're selling in time and have the best rates and you want to feel like you're being taken care of with whatever company you're using to do so. Again, shipping can really make or break your business if you're selling online. So ship station is totally the solution. They help online sellers get orders out quickly, save money on shipping costs and keep customers happy so it matter where you're selling Shopify.

[00:39:08]

Our stores on top of I would love shopping like Amazon, eBay, your own website ship station. It'll bring all your orders into one simple interface and make them really easy to manage from any device, even your cell phone, so you can do this on the go. They work with all the major carriers, UPS, FedEx, UPS, even international. Shout out to our mail carriers, by the way, for the election. I believe nothing made me happier than seeing people hyping the mailman.

[00:39:30]

The mail truck in L.A., champagne showers. People were like dousing this post on this like postal worker. They did it. We did. Oh, they did it. So anyway, I'm passionate about shipping right now. If you can't say yes. P.S. there actually is our shipping zat. You guys understand. I like do the merchant actually does the shipping and she is psychotically obsessed with making sure that you guys get the best rates humanly possible. Yes, exactly.

[00:39:52]

So and that's what ship station does so that they, they offer big discounts on shipping costs. Now any business can access the same postage discounts that are usually reserved for large Fortune 500 companies. You always will know you're getting the best deal. You're not get taken advantage of and then you can pass them on to your customers. So it is really no wonder Ship Station is the number one choice of online sellers. You'll ship more in less time with the best rates available and we want to help you guys out.

[00:40:15]

We cannot recommend them enough. If you are struggling at all with shipping it with your online store, this is what you need. So right now a girl's got to listeners can try it. Ship station free for sixty days. When you use offer cogie, make sure your business can meet the demands of this massive online shopping season. Get started at ship station at Dotcom. Click on the microphone at the top of the homepage and type engie. So it's a little bit different.

[00:40:36]

So you go to the top, you see this like microphone icon. That's when you type Bengi and again that's a ship station dotcom. Then enter offer cogie ship station dot com make ship happen. Get your ship together, get your ship going. It will change your online business. And let's talk about changing the way that you eat. OK, daily harvest. Ashley, I discovered it through this podcast. It has completely changed the way that we eat, order food, cook at home.

[00:41:00]

We are the biggest fans of this if you want to find stuff that is easier to make. Healthier quick is just going to be like in your fridge, ready to go daily, Harvest delivers delicious food built on organic fruits and vegetables right to your door. Everything stays fresh in the freezer until you get to enjoy it. It helps you reduce food waste. There's tons of variety and everything takes like literally a couple of minutes to prepare actually is pretty much always in the middle of making one.

[00:41:24]

When I get here, I literally she's gave me a because I forgot about the other butternut squash chimichurri ball. Also, I just want to say this. If you want to start your mon's like me, I have the Mitton Kakao smoothie every single Monday if I have one left and it's Thursday, the week before, I'm like, sorry, you're staying in the freezer till Monday because that's how I start every single week for the last, like, I don't know, three or four months.

[00:41:44]

That is my routine. I don't have a lot of routines. That is one of them. Get your supper routine. There is so much variety here. There's smoothies. If you want to start your day with a smoothie, there's flatbreads, there's soups, there's oat bowls, there's chia bowls. I am obsessed with edibles and they have snacks. We're talking about like all these little things. But just like a little bit more about the company in general, they never use preservatives.

[00:42:04]

There's no added sugar, you know, artificial ingredients. Everything is directly with farmers. They freeze ingredients at their peak ripeness. There's so much you can do here. All this harvest rolls. Do you want to add things? I think the portion sizes are great, but if you want a little extra protein, you can add chicken or shrimp or a protein to any of these bowls I think are absolutely fantastic. So if you're not somebody who knows how to cook, likes to cook, this is a great entry way into that.

[00:42:26]

If you want to just start out easy, it's basically there for you. We're going to you guys an awesome discount so you can check it out. Daily Harvest makes it easy to clean undeniably delicious food no matter what your day brings. Keep it simple with daily harvest got a daily harvest dotcom and enter the promo code GGGI to get twenty five dollars off your first box. That's promo code DJ for twenty five dollars off your first box at Daily Harvest Dotcom.

[00:42:50]

That's Daily Harvest Dotcom. All right we are back with Lillien. OK, so we don't even know where to start. There's so much to talk about. But why don't we start with kind of your whole philosophy, methodology, all the things. Yeah. So I mean my main, my main message is that there's really nothing wrong with any of our bodies, that we are whole and complete and perfect and beautiful from the inside out and the things that we choose for our bodies, whether that's, you know, food or, you know, the exercise that we're choosing, you know, can make us inflamed or whatever.

[00:43:26]

Injured is the same thing with clothes. And so instead of choosing things that literally feel like a punishment, you know, because you know or even brands like people like I keep you know, I only wear this. But, you know, sometimes these three things don't work about this brand. And I'm like, well, then choose a different fucking brand, you know, really helping people. The very first stage of my six week program is like, here are the top three or four brands that are right for your body.

[00:43:53]

Specifically, this is your shape. Let's celebrate your shape and not worry and focus about what everybody else is doing all the time. And then, like your coloring, like, oh, I love this top, but it's not the right color. And I'm like, it's also not the ratio, but it's not the right. You can love something and it not be for you. Right. I mean, again, these are all the better. I've dated.

[00:44:15]

Exactly. I mean really, really, really, really, really, really. I don't know him well. Yeah. I don't wear him well and so or like, you know, you wear something out and you feel miserable and you're like what is the cost of this. Like is this really worth me going leaving the house and not feeling amazing because I think you see like certain trends like and they look good on the on somebody on Instagram or whatever, and they are so bad for most body is right.

[00:44:44]

Like there is this I feel like there's this type of top or like dress or whatever and it's like floaty and it's blousy. And it took me so many years to be like, I will never buy another item of clothing like that. I will never I don't even like it. You know what it's like. It looks good on this random model, but like working with you for me and has just taught me to be like, I don't even go there.

[00:45:04]

I don't like boundaries. I don't I don't look at that. Yeah, that's not for me. Yeah. So it doesn't mean you can't be trendy and stylish, but like not everything's going to be for you. And I think probably what you help people is be like don't even stop going there. Yeah. And I even told like, like every single body type I'll be like, listen girl, you are so lucky. Here's why. And it does not matter what body type to have.

[00:45:26]

I'm like, you are lucky because you get to wear. And then I send them like an entire pdf of like there are. These are literally all your options for good looking. You are like I get to do this. I love this reframing of how you think about your body. And like I think all the time, like I wish that I could wear actually wears like longer bike shorts. And I love the look. I think I look so great on you.

[00:45:46]

I can't wear those. They look ridiculous. I mean, I instead of like thinking all the time, like, I'm so jealous, I don't have super long legs like Ashley, like I have giant titties and Ashley doesn't have there's certain things that I've always been like I'm so bummed about my body, you know, like I'm pretty short, but it's like there's other things I get to where I come out here and peplum tops.

[00:46:03]

I'm not doing any ridiculous. Good call. Try. Kataib, that is that's what I'm talking about in peplum top. No one looks good, though. I mean and also like I just have a different style. Like I, I've always rejected this, like Southern kind of like. Right. I don't do florals. Like, I don't walk around like I am very I'm like a New York lady. And I was when I lived in the 80s.

[00:46:25]

Yeah. So yeah. Like I think it's knowing that like yeah. All my sorority sisters wear that shit but I don't like it and I don't look at it. I'm not going to do it. It's not my style like helping people find their style. But let's talk about this, let's keep talking about this like it's not your body, it's your clothes, your stuff. So one of my favorite things to tell people, because, you know, they'll be like, oh, revolve or whatever the brand is they want to wear or, you know, even like golden goose sneakers.

[00:46:46]

And I'm like, it's OK. Guess you know how many amazing sneakers there are that don't cost. Eight hundred and fifty dollars are they are, you know, and look dirty and look dirty like there are so many options out there. And one of the things I tell people is I am hella allergic to avocados and avocados are very trendy. They're on clothes, they're on mugs, they're in every Sunday, they're on, you know, like they're in everything.

[00:47:10]

But I don't show up to a restaurant and go, you know, I'm like, really a shame because, like, I can't eat avocados. Like, this is the same fucking thing with coke. You can cancel brunch. Yeah. I'm like, I'm not even a white girl if I guess. Yes. Yes.

[00:47:24]

And people always make a big deal about it and they're like, oh really? And I'm like, yeah, fuck off. Like, my body doesn't do that. And I feel the same way about clothes. I'm like, my body gives a shit. If your body doesn't do peplum or whatever it is, you know, it's OK if you're not a prairie dress girl. So what? It's this really great sense of looking at something that has a ton of likes and everybody likes.

[00:47:46]

And you think if the picture is beautiful and then you have to say to yourself, like, that's not for me and I'm going to go back to my like, whatever all black or whatever it is like, it's really it's like liberating. It is super. I mean, I think it's one of the most freeing processes in the world. I mean, I have a lot of different food allergy things like, you know, I'm like not great with oats and scallops, kill me.

[00:48:06]

And I used to getting Zaidee going to the grocery store because I would be like, what am I going to eat here? That's going to make me feel like I'm being tortured, like, you know, like it would make me feel really uncomfortable. And I think that that's probably my best metaphor for women that walk into stores where they're like, I'm going to feel really horrible about myself if I even try these things. And so I think just having, like the guidelines, my job as a person siles is not to be like, wear this, wear this.

[00:48:31]

You need to be putting yourself in these things. But to really ask you, how do you feel? And clients that kind of get upset with me when I ask that question, they're like, what do you mean how I feel? I care about how I look. And I'm like, No, no, no, no. What you feel is actually how you show up. Like what you feel is what's going to be read by other people, not just how you look, you know, and if you look great, but you can't walk or it's too tight across your shoulders, you're going to leave.

[00:49:00]

Well, we've talked about this like on stage. I've worn stuff on stage. We're just like you said, like I see it on a mannequin. I see it on Instagram. I order it. I, I know that I am not great on stage if my whole night I'm just thinking about my body and I'm constantly adjusting myself. I don't know if anybody notices, but sometimes like I'll look at pictures after a show and I will have been adjusting myself fifty percent of the photos and like it kills me that like I could have been a little funnier and just gotten out of my head.

[00:49:26]

But I like, forced myself to get into this outfit that, like, I didn't like the green jumper still in my closet. Maybe we'll throw it out today. I'm open it. Let's burn. Hundred fifty dollar, insanely gorgeous, gorgeous scotch and soda jumper because I couldn't not own it. It is so stunning. I saw it in a window in Philly and I was like, I have to own it. I don't care what it costs.

[00:49:45]

I it looks so badly. It looks so terrible to me. The ways the street like I've wanted to two shows and I've finally just been like I'm burning it like I it wasn't for me and I bought it anyway and I still wore it on stage twice. And the second time I wore it, I sat up there the entire show, Minneapolis I wanted and I knew I didn't. Look, I'm burning you with my eyes right now and it's like this mistake that like we've got to let go and be like, oh, God, it's so gorgeous.

[00:50:11]

It's just not gorgeous on me.

[00:50:13]

I mean, it's like I mean, I don't know if you're ready for the Segway yet, but another matter for little.

[00:50:18]

OK, hold on. Randy's getting off. I'm a bit of horse, right. Masturbated in like a week except for last night. So there's another room, remember there.

[00:50:28]

So I had a call with, like, my intuitive guide girl that I've been using for a while. And she said, listen, you know, you're really you're getting better at this dating thing. You know, like I can just tell she said you used to window shop and you would fall in love with something in the window and you would be like, I have to have this. I don't care what it costs. It is beautiful. You went in like you tried on for four seconds.

[00:50:48]

You would put down the money and then you would walk out and then you'd be like, I will figure it out when I get home.

[00:50:52]

And that is so true. Like, I mean, for a long time I was like, oh my God, it's so good looking like fancy it if I can afford it. Can afford it. Yeah. I got. I earned this and. Then she goes, and then you would put it on. Her name is Jane Arraf, she's amazing. You would put it on and walk around the store and decide like that. You probably didn't need it.

[00:51:15]

So you'd put it on her, you'd put it back. And she goes, now, you just go into the dressing room, you put it on once and you're like, not for me. And you put it right back on it. Don't even leave the dressing room. I'm like, bitch, go off. Yes, yes. That is growth. I mean, really, really, really, really. But if we can do that with our clothes and with all the other decisions that we make in our lives, it's one big metaphor.

[00:51:35]

You're right. I buy things all the time online where I'm like I feel like that would look nice sitting on my floor. And I got a I think that I've learned that I don't want to do it. Either of you want to do it, do it. And that's your style. It's probably not my style. Yeah. It's so much like dating. It is so much like dating. This is I don't date your comedians anymore. Yeah I do.

[00:51:54]

When I was this sentence.

[00:51:59]

Yeah. You have one date tonight with a comedian. I am indeed a comedian like Marjorie being the last person you dated, but I'm not like everyone I know, but like I know.

[00:52:15]

But I'm not I'm just using that as an example to. But like, you do a certain you do you do something a certain amount of times and you're like, it's not good for me. And I'm just going to this pattern is going to continue like I don't imagine comedians anymore. I'm I'm not wearing florals. The patterns are over and time, money, energy is something like people someone asked me this morning, oh, do you ever shop vintage stuff?

[00:52:34]

And I was like, no, because time, money, energy. Like, I can fit into some jackets, but like, there's no way I'm going to spend the time, money and energy on pants that are vintage because like my hip to waist ratio is really nice. I'm really proud of it, but it just doesn't I'm not going to go in and like try to make something work just to try to make it work. But I'd be like, oh, it's vintage.

[00:52:51]

Like, I don't care, you know? And so I just avoid that. Like, I might go in and I'm not going to buy brooch just because it says Chanel, like, I don't care, you know. But I also have those parameters around that. I'm like, here are the things I do care about. Like it is shit on a jury, because if I don't wear it and a jury I'll be covered in tattoos was just like a line.

[00:53:09]

That's your that's your tattoos. So I have a question because, like, people probably come to you and some people say, like, I only want florals or I only want designer, like, how do you step away from your own personal style and say, like, OK, let's do my own personal. Does that make sense? Yeah. If, like, you only want to shop a couple of brands and turnstyles, how do you look at somebody else that has a totally different taste than you and help them dress.

[00:53:30]

Yeah, that makes sense. I just read people on a very, very deep level very quickly. I would say it's it's one of my superpowers is like, you know, I'm working with everyone virtually now and they flash up on the screen and some of the questions that I ask, like recently I worked with this girl and if she's like, I don't know, I don't know. I don't know any of the answers to any of these questions.

[00:53:51]

I don't I don't know. I don't know. And literally, she lived in her home for a year and there was nothing on the walls. And she was like, I just I'm not sure what to put up on these walls. I was like, OK, I knew she was married. And I said, show me your wedding dress. She'd been married twice. So to show me your wedding dress first. And of course, we're virtual.

[00:54:11]

So she pulls it up on the screen on Zoom, shows me the first one tells me about, like, her vibe, you know, seven years ago, shows me the most recent one. And then I was like, show me your book, showed me your book, showed me like the jewelry she wore. And I listed, like, seven words. And I was like, does any of this resonate for where you are right now? And she was like, bingo.

[00:54:31]

And then from those descriptions and those kind of like just the mood of what she showed me, I was like, here's this is what your personal style like. This is what you're expressing with your energy, the things that you choose, what you wanted to wear on a really important day. And if you haven't been married, like I always ask people like what was the thing that you have felt amazing? And maybe it was like the thing you graduated in or you gave like a TED talk in or whatever it is.

[00:54:56]

Show me that and then let's build something that feels similar because it's not always going to look like me. I mean, it's rarely going to look like me. And that's usually when people are like, you get me like you really get me. And I'm like, Yeah, I hear you. I see you. Well, that's what you do with me. You scrolled my Instagram and you found the things you were like this one. You looked like the happiest man or whatever.

[00:55:18]

Like these are things I've seen you wear on your Instagram stories and stuff that like define you like the blue jumpsuit or whatever. There's a few things. And you were like you basically made a vision board for me and then went based off that like. Yeah, you read people based on like that. I love that. You said, oh, when did you when did you love what you were wearing. Let's start there. And how did how did you feel like.

[00:55:37]

Because I can't say that enough. Like I mean the people that I work with, they're like I got a promotion or like I just started dating for the first time or you know, like I worked with someone whose husband committed suicide and like she was like, how do I get back out there? Like, how do I, you know, that kind of stuff. And it really does. It's like you have to take that care step for yourself first.

[00:55:59]

And I think about it as. Armor's maybe not the right word, but it is a suiting that you put on to say like, hey, I care about you and I love you and I'm here for you and I'm going to take care of you and I'm going to do the things that feel really good for you in your body. You said something that was really beautiful. Yeah, I you said something right before we started recording, which is that you work with a lot of new mothers and that is, you know, a whole new body that suddenly you've never had before.

[00:56:25]

And like the confidence you must be able to give people that are like, I've never been in this body before. Exactly. You know, to to gift them that type of confidence, OK, we're all going to work. But what you do is really beautiful and you will give tips. We're going to, like, do tips. Yeah, but it's really wonderful what you've dedicated your life to. And then also it's like you look at somebody like Steve Jobs and just had this whole thing of, like, I wear the same thing every day.

[00:56:48]

And that's a fine way to live your life, too, because that's what you feel comfortable in. Yeah, like, I think having a uniform, if that's who you are as a person, that's how you want to show up and feel comfortable. I mean, my mom asked me what I was going to wear in this photo shoot that I this morning. She's like, what's your color scheme? Like army, green, black and denim white.

[00:57:04]

Any other questions? Like, That's my daughter. That's who I am. Yeah, but I in terms of tips, if you want to just like I'll just drop one right here is that, you know, variety is really nice.

[00:57:14]

You can stay very tight with your uniform but have variety so that you don't get bored. It's not so that other people don't see you in the same thing.

[00:57:23]

But like if you want to feel fresh in something, what do you see people do, quote unquote wrong the most like with their body type. But we can even pick a few. We can pick really tall, really short, huge boobs plus size. You know what? Whatever it may be, it's across the board. I mean, this is hard to like. I just it's going to be hard. I mean, we can talk for hours about this stuff.

[00:57:43]

But if you have a few things that might resonate with it's wearing the wrong size. Oh, you know why? Because women, they're it's kind of two fold. Women see things and they're like, I just want to be comfortable. So I'm just going to wear this really baggy thing. So they get an really oversized piece. And you can pretty much every body type can wear oversized, but it has to be the right cut for your oversized.

[00:58:09]

And the other thing that I see is that is just like straight up sloppy, like I'm going to call it, like I see it is women that are like, oh, I, I know that I should wear figure flattering things. And then they buy a size bigger than what they wear because they want to be comfortable. And I say, listen, you can wear things that are fitted but they need to be in your size or you can wear looser style.

[00:58:30]

That also needs to be in your size, but you need to wear this your size. You think people are trying to cover it? Like my mom gained a runaway thyroid problems around in our family and she was wearing these like giant baggy things. It just it added so much more weight when she started wearing skirts that, like, actually cinched her waist. It took twenty pounds off without actually losing the weight. Yeah, yeah. I mean, so many of the women I work with are like everyone thinks that are like, you know, got a gym membership and I'm like, no girl, you just weren't the right size.

[00:58:58]

Clothes and sizing is a mindfuck, right? I mean, it's so right.

[00:59:02]

It's like what even a size where people were like, I don't know, I just never thought I could wear a medium. And I'm like, it doesn't matter. Like just don't even look at this letter or no, it's just like this. Yeah. I teach people like here's how to look at the seam on your shoulder. Here's how to look at the dart on your boob. Here's how to look at where your belly button is and where your jean is like really tailoring it down to this is for your body.

[00:59:24]

Regardless of what the tag says, it doesn't fucking matter. Right.

[00:59:28]

And I mean, somebody that we love, obviously, is Katie Sarino who takes these clothes, these outfits that are on models and actresses and really thin people. And she's like, here's how to wear it at a plus size. Yeah, you know what I mean? And I think that somebody another plus a plus size model we've had on is Hunter McGrady. And it's like she wears like she works with athletics and she wears a lot of tighter fitted, fitted stuff.

[00:59:53]

So she looks amazing like that.

[00:59:56]

You see a lot of people buying stuff because I've done this before. I they're like this is going to fit in the view. Oh, God, I like how many people do that. So I talk about this a lot in my course, my closet klinz course. I think it's can be pretty self punishing to keep things that are more than two sizes away. And I ask people if they are hell bent on keeping things that are more than two.

[01:00:22]

Like I really you know, if you are a twelve and you're like, well, when I get back to a four, I'm like, is this the energy that you want to wake up with every morning to walk through your closet and have this whole conversation with yourself every day? Like, I personally don't think that that's worth it. And that's also from an energetic standpoint, like your clothes are these things that hold a vibration as well. And there are over there like flowers like that.

[01:00:44]

I mean, you can never have me like that's like that's not a that's like not kind to you. So I told people this to size is a way rule. And I also tell people to put them all together like none of this color coordinated shit where all of your small sizes are all mixed in, like put them over to the size and call it and not right now pile. Not I'm too big for this, but this is just like not right now, OK?

[01:01:06]

I love this advice. I'm glad that I actually told people to put a ribbon around it and just say, like, this is a gentle reminder and just make the whole process more gentle. We need more just completely, you know. And I mean, again, sometimes people, you know, I mean, there is a little different or and it's also there is money involved here. You know, we're but like, if it if money isn't an issue and you're like, one day I will get back to that for then you'll buy new clothes.

[01:01:33]

I mean, you know, half the time, you know, when people are like two or three sizes away, I'm like, do you give a shit about these clothes that are two or three sizes away like this? Same the style of them. Like they'll be like, oh, but I want to fit in. I'm like, but you don't even like the clothes are ugly now. You don't even like the clothes anymore. I love that you said that too.

[01:01:47]

Like yeah I got I go in and I purge a lot and I'm just like how do I even like that. Like I'll got myself. There's like one fucking ugly thing in there, but it's like it's weirdly sentimental every once in a while that's just going to keep like it holds a special place and it's just throwing this stuff away, like whatever, giving it to goodwill. I mean, I do consignment and goodwill, but like letting go. Yeah.

[01:02:10]

Like I want to talk more about that. I think that I definitely suffer from like when do I throw this out and I get back to the sizes is going to be in style again. Do I still maybe one day down the road in two years. I'll wear this on stage with you to like how do you what's your theories on purging a closet in general? Oh, I have a lot of theory. You know, people people can, like, sign up and do your courses.

[01:02:31]

You don't have to give it all away, but like a few tips would be like, so great. One of my things, like I read probably six months ago, it was like, Neon's totally out, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Well, I it's one of like the colors I look really good on is like a neon green. And I was like, fuck that rule. I'm not following that. Like this is what looks good on me.

[01:02:50]

And so I'm not I'm really not worried about trends at all.

[01:02:54]

I literally focus on what feels good, like on my body physically, physiologically, and then if I feel good, people are like, damn, you look good. I'm like, thanks, I feel great. Right? And so I really focus on, like, how do I want to feel before I throw anything out that's like, is this going to be in style? Is it not? I'm like, do I enjoy having this on my body?

[01:03:14]

And that's kind of how I focus on my clothes. I feel like, well, when you like when you work with people, is that what you pass on to them? Yeah. You know, sometimes, you know, if it's like blatantly like if it's just a lot of times I can tell if something's not just out of style, like it's old, it's an old fuck. Yeah. And I'll be like, this bitch is sleepy, like she wants to go to bed and I'll be like it's time to like it's time to go for the forever nap.

[01:03:37]

Like we're going to put these over here. Like we always laugh when I do the purge because people it's lighthearted, it's a let go process. It's like I can't believe I did that.

[01:03:45]

And and then every time after the purchase and people are like, I just, you know, quit my job.

[01:03:52]

I just like I just like, you know, I mean, like, it's big, it's big. Like translation. It's like it's this like big like weight is lifted. Yeah. Or they'll be like I just took all the pillows in my house to Goodwill or I just took all the art off my walls.

[01:04:07]

I just like I mean it's it's almost traumatic. It's dramatic. Yeah. For sure. Therapeutic. Yeah. Because it's just this weight, you know. And do you have a time stamp if you haven't worn this in X amount of time, you know, get the fuck out of here. Yeah I do that personally. I have not touched that shit in a year. You pick a year that's your time because because you've had all seasons, you know, all this like if I didn't wear that a year, why did I not wear that a year?

[01:04:34]

Maybe if it's something fancy and it's been a pandemic. OK, but I cut you off. You said you tell us how you feel about about timestamps. I mean, I do purge for sure. But instead of, like, waiting to purge everything at once for me personally, because I shop a lot, I go through and instead of being like, oh, I haven't worn that a year, I'll be like when I get dressed. One of the ways and we can talk about this for how we set ourselves up for dates is like, what have I not worn yet, like instead or what have I not worn in three weeks or what have I not worn this season?

[01:05:03]

And then if I put it on and it's like, oh, you know what?

[01:05:07]

Oh, then it's an immediate yes, I love that. And so instead of like again waiting to this moment, one day I'm going to purge my closet. Like, I just kind of do it like month to month where right before I go out, I'm like, who wants to play?

[01:05:21]

And then I, I pull out the thing kind of like a Beauty and the beast moment with like the cabinet and the. Yeah, but that's the self talk to is let's take this shirt for example. Would I put that on to go on a date to go to dinner with a friend, to go to work. If the answer is no, no, no, what the hell is he doing in there. I think like that too of like why is it sitting there?

[01:05:41]

Because I don't want to wear it.

[01:05:42]

Here's other here's the big, big you know, sometimes people I don't know, I don't I don't know. And I go, well, would you buy it again? And they're like like drop boom. No. You know, like that's the big. Yeah. Would you put your money on it again? No. You know, I don't believe that you're right. Would you try this on? That's the thing.

[01:06:00]

I can't wait to go home. I have a. Until it's over. Are we done? Are we done here? I have a list of stuff I'm just like tallying up in my head and I'm just like, I'm never. Would you bury it? Like, I, I have huge boobs and I'm short. I can't wear things that truncate me. I'm always buying these, like little tops. I'm never going to wear them. I need to elongate.

[01:06:20]

Yeah. Monochrome. I want to talk about the floral pants were in Dallas.

[01:06:26]

All right. I wasn't going to bring those up but. Lilian, first of all, it took us both like a minute to get a handle on our show clothes because it's a very different type of thing because you're sitting the entire time. Right. So, like, you have to figure out where we all have. We all have a belly roll when we sit, you know what I mean? So you got to figure out what what you don't feel like you have that you're uncomfortable because you have a fat roll or whatever gets your arm out.

[01:06:54]

Like you raise your mike and your arm gets bigger, it looks bigger and photos. It's like all these things have to go looking over the camera like, oh, no, you're like punch back in your arms, your arm in Cuba, right. I literally looked over and I was like, oh. So we were we were in Dallas. We've only been once because we were supposed to go with Pandemic. We were in Dallas. I wore my best outfit I've ever worn.

[01:07:18]

I bought it from the runway. It's a Siara, La Nina, whatever the blue jumpsuit. Yeah. Yeah. So it's like made of like a wetsuit material, whatever. It's a brand around the runway. I have a bunch of stuff. I loved it so much that I kept it on that show. Reyna came back and she had gone to the mall because what she used to do, which was her one of her flaws, which is I'm not I'm not I'm not I'm not insulting her.

[01:07:42]

She knows this is she was we weren't planning she would just procrastinate and not have clothes for the shows until we got to the city and she would try to go shop at the last minute. I was like, I don't know how you live like this girl. This is fucking crazy. Like I'm picking out exactly what I'm wearing every night. Their cities, we've shopped it and stuff like that. But she wouldn't be prepared for that because she didn't. It's also fine.

[01:08:02]

I'm sitting here that I was I'm also five feet tall. I need to get stuff of it's bad. It's bad. So Rayna comes back from the mall or wherever she went and the bases and she was like, here's my weird tonight. She pulled this pair of pants out. And I was like, oh, oh my God.

[01:08:20]

Yeah, no, no. I couldn't tell her. She was an hour till the show.

[01:08:27]

She's like actually naked. So they were good today.

[01:08:29]

Were they were they literally their floral pajama pajama pants with a big waistband and she just wore a rolled the waistband like so bad with like just a black bodysuit. Honestly, it was the only time in like eighty shows. The photographer texted me in the middle of the night. None of the photos turned out. And I was like, this is probably I know it looks like, but it was like you do have a sense of style, you have a personal style.

[01:08:59]

I don't know what happened to you. Like, like I've never seen you do anything like that since I was like, remember when you did a bunch of drugs, right?

[01:09:06]

Like where? And then you went shopping and then you got on stage. I just want to be like, oh my God, what do I know her at all? It was my whole family was there that was not good. But anyway, so we've had to learn to. But I want to talk about date stuff and I want to give some tips and stuff like that. But can we I want to talk about our body types because people can probably relate to me or to write like super fucking tall.

[01:09:29]

I don't have huge breasts and like Reyna's like she short. She's these huge breasts like. Yeah. Like what is right. I need to do not that she's not doing it, but like someone with her body type, like what do you see when you see like good tips for a shorter person. Yeah always. And yeah. Yeah. So I mean some of the things that Randy can do is like definitely power dressing which means things like a big waistband, like things that are we're really trying to draw attention to all the right places.

[01:09:53]

So like it's great that you draw attention to your chest. I love that. I mean, my favorite thing that I've ever seen you wear. Let's just start there. Let's start with our ideals. Right. Like best of is the denim jumpsuit with the short sleeve and about a it's monochromatic. So you just look like one nice long partner. You do look tall and you look long. Just look like there's nothing breaking you up. Same color jumpsuits are good.

[01:10:16]

Oh yeah. I mean it's sleek but it literally makes you look like you're one like ongoing thing. Anything like nude heels are actually going to be best for you because it just looks like your legs keep going. Yeah, I mean, that's an elongating thing. You're right, because I don't buy, like, something with a short drive. Yeah. You should get a nude heel. I like the only time I wear the cuffed heels, like on stage that I love are with a pant but the pant.

[01:10:40]

Yeah. So what are we so wear like a stiletto. Yeah. There's an ankle strap. Uncle strap. Yeah. But would you like a pant leg cuff with jeans. I love it because it just adds like a little fashion thing to the New York and I love this nude bottom. Yeah.

[01:10:54]

Nude pump. And then honestly I know this is like so personal preference for people, but I, I kind of go hard on this. When you wear your hair up, when you're so much shorter, like you are giving yourself just more overall space to breathe. Like I tell people like wear your hair up, especially if you're going to wear something like with a collar, like add some height to the top of your hair and then like really bring focus to your face, even if they're very small studs, like we want to look up like we're all looking up instead of like your eye already goes down when you're short.

[01:11:28]

So what are the things that are going to draw attention to your gorgeous. I love all this. OK, so how we address what about a really large chest, like what is better for that? Because I think that the two things I think I've suffered with either wanting to cover it up and I wear something baggy and that looks like a tent on me, which looks terrible, I'm or accentuating it a little bit can make them look enormous. And then that's the only thing.

[01:11:51]

And then for you, I feel like there's a there's the occasion because you'll wear like baggy casual stuff to record because you don't wanna have your titties out. But then you look back and you don't like because it was like a 10. So it's like I feel like it's hard for you to figure out how good is what she has on right now with the half zip down like I love this. It's for me it goes a little bit in. Exactly.

[01:12:12]

So to me, like the best thing you can do for yourself, you know, if you're wearing a hoodie, you've literally got the hood, you've got your hair and you've got your boobs. There's a lot going on all like above your belly button. It's just a lot of volume. It's hair, it's boobs, it's hood. And so what you have on right now with the thing being zipped down a little bit further, like it opens your body up, like literally is more like a window to see more of you instead of just the volume that is all around.

[01:12:40]

OK, does that make sense? Would you avoid like turtlenecks? She asked me the other day why I don't wear turtlenecks and I always feel like it makes my boobs look bigger. So I don't know some of the things that I would look bomb on. You look like a tight like your titties and then like her waist and like Tarlac. I don't know.

[01:12:54]

But you. Yeah. So I mean, there are like different log's and some will say different things. I think it really kind of depends on like how great your waist is. And I think for you you can do a turtleneck with because you can make the focus point your waist. In addition, like I mean one of my best two of my best, best, best, best, best girlfriends have your thighs, chest or larger. They're both my height, but I mean probably larger than your chest and they look incredible in a turtleneck.

[01:13:23]

Now, here's the thing. I wish I really wish we could do like I really wish people were listening, but like watching because the visual is so good. So when you are doing a strap that goes or a sleeve that goes straight back, you're kind of drawing this line that is like kind of more of a column straight down. Whereas if I see how I'm cutting this in, then we're focusing on like your shoulders and then your chest instead of just like, oh, wow, your shoulders are and your chest are the same.

[01:13:50]

So you want to kind of focus on, like, where are you drawing the eye? We're going to look at your shoulders. Then we're going to look at your boobs and not just your boobs. Are your shoulders OK? And they're your neck, you know what I mean? So for me, I'm so flat chested. I'm like a thirty two C and I have on a sports bra and this is a crystal. I don't have a that's one.

[01:14:08]

So I actually excel in this too because you're focusing more on my shoulders and not on just wasteland of shirt. That looks great on you by the way. Thank you. I love this one. Also I feel like people probably heard you say see and they're like, what are you talking about? Your flat chested IPOs. I was thirty 4c. Yeah. Bra sizing is a whole nother animal. Yeah. And when you get you wouldn't look at my titties and think that they're C's but they are and every Brian is a thirty four C since I went to a place that was professional and measured.

[01:14:38]

So like we're not here to have a bra sizes but huge part of your life. Wardrobe is getting the right size bra and like. Yes, like the best bra places or I want to intimacy in Atlanta. And so if they still have that they're all sizes go up to K because we've I'm a C, so rain is not going to be a D, you know. I mean or even a double D like if they were to measure you because you're probably 30, 40.

[01:15:02]

Yeah. I minimize those are great for me. Spanx makes the best I've ever wore in my life. I'm wearing right now and separates here today is because so many bras are like would be like sexier. But when you have a backup you want to push your titties together. My size. I don't need to push them together, go together. So yeah, they're hanging out there together. They're going to say that they've been together. Yeah. So I wanna minimize there's a lot because I just feel more comfortable in them and it's not a sports bra, just a way to make them a little smaller.

[01:15:29]

So I don't. Yeah. That's why I just had to jump in because you said I'm Blatche and there were thirty to see and people were like we're like the record screech because you're sure you don't. It was eye opening to me. This was years ago. I blogged about it at the time of like going in and being like, damn, I'm a thirty four C and like I really am and I have small titties.

[01:15:45]

You know what is amazing and we were just talking before we hit record, we were talking about breast implants and there was a point in my life when I was thinking about breast implants. This is years ago and I went and got fitted for a bra and I was like, oh, duh, this is my own message. It's not your body. It's the it's literally your bra. And so in my six week program, one of the kind of like disclaimers is like, hey, you have to commit to doing things like getting your bra, like adjusted.

[01:16:12]

Otherwise we can't work together if you're not in the right size underwear. Yeah. You know, like this is part of your work. I love that. I mean, that was a experience I had. They called her the bra whisperer. I don't know if she's still there. And Candice. Yeah, maybe it was. And she was an older lady and she was in their shoes for. Upon me and like I had, I cried because I was like, when you have this, like, old lady being like, honey, you've been wearing the wrong bra size your whole life, you're going to see your bottle.

[01:16:45]

I thought, I know this America's Next Top Model Gasteyer all time.

[01:16:52]

But then I was like, oh, that's just intimacy, because they have a million fucking sizes. But it doesn't I'm pretty much can go into a brand like I'm wearing this like I wear Siman Parelli. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. They sell this intimacy. Yes. That's the best robertsport of all time. And then I just bottle there are the Brozman whenever they're having a sale and I'll take whatever 30 forces you have. But yeah. So I can pretty much agat bras or whatever I can pretty much that is my size.

[01:17:15]

But that was like so life changing for me and we could do a whole session on lingerie. And I think it's the most I've been I have not been in like many, many long term relationships. But you better believe, like my lingerie game is on point for me, like I am what it is, it is 100 percent one of the best things I've ever done for myself. And people are like twenty eight dollars on a pair of underwear.

[01:17:35]

I'm like, you know, some of the underwear I've had for like many years because it's nice and I love Hanky-Panky. You guys talk about Hanky-Panky is on the all I wear.

[01:17:42]

But yeah, I mean, anything that's lace will get destroyed if you don't spend a little bit of money on it. You know, it's all about sex sells. Yeah. I mean I was like, no, I'm here. I see where I go that I just took a turn off, you know, that I had so much I want to talk about your body. OK, so let's talk about tall girls. You are tall girl expert. Your sister is six feet tall.

[01:18:05]

Yeah, I'm five ten. And there are certainly struggles that taller women face when shopping and we want to get into it. Yeah. So I just I, I love tall women. I love like all women so much. It's why I'm here. But, you know, I encourage women that are like, why can't wear heels? I'm like literally who told you that you could not wear heels? It's just this like headline that you read about yourself.

[01:18:29]

And then you were like, oh, that's my headline. Like Change the fucking headline. Where would you want to wear? So, you know, tall women, actually, they kind of want to disappear a little bit because they're like, I'm so noticeable already. Like I'm so I stick out so much. So they're not wearing fitted things. They're wearing things that are kind of like baggy where they're, you know, they're choosing things that are just like I just going to, like, kind of disappear in this because I already stick out.

[01:18:50]

I'm so tall. And I would I would just encourage you to figure out, like, what your shape is. I mean, I think that's the most important thing that you can do for your self-confidence to work around your shape versus just your height. And then from there, like like I said in the beginning, you're lucky, like starting to really focusing focus on the fact that, like, you're so fortunate that you get to, you know, like I tell everybody, type every woman.

[01:19:16]

You're so fortunate that you get to do that. And so, you know, those things that, like shorter women like Raina are like, that's not for me focusing on those. What are some good brands we said made while love made. Wow. Because this is like that this is the struggle I get constantly. Where do I shop? So definitely I mean made well I think is the number one for everyone because I they're curvy. They, they do pregnancy or the maternity.

[01:19:43]

They do. Sure they are. Do they do petite. They do tall. They do taller. Taller. That's what it is. Yeah. And taller. Just expressed you that she was unusually short and regular. Do they. Tall. Yeah. So express actually my wingspan is seven inches longer than my height. The girl. Yes.

[01:20:02]

Your arms are still your arms. I can't stop staring at them. They're so long. So long. So express is a there are longer. They're like a long and lean kind of brand. That's why it's so good on you. J.Crew has tall like I mean they have some good dolls. My sister at six one like her body type wears banana republic really well. Most brands now have tall you know, I mean like I would say most of them do for like a more formal like someone I feel like from GE reach out about like non boring suiting.

[01:20:33]

I really like the links on the floor. OK, they, I mean they are like heavy on ads on Instagram and stuff, but they have the thing that I love about them is they have they're there for like, you know, court business banking. I mean, they're definitely like business where finance that kind of stuff. But their stuff is their fabrics are very stretchy. So you can go and they do a lot of like kind of long and lean.

[01:20:59]

They do like long pencil skirts and that kind of thing so that you can get the stuff that's it's naturally already longer without even having a tall option. Yeah, that makes sense. They're amazing. OK, run longer. Exos has a ton of sizing to an association. I mean it's not the most quality but that's I post a suit on my Instagram that I post a whole lot of pictures and and it was an associate but I like their site.

[01:21:24]

Again, it's it can be a little hit or miss, but sizing they have it all. They need their plus size. They have tall. And I wanted to see if you had. Some plusses, like all inclusive recommendations to I mean, brands are getting better with it, but do you have if you go to you love that like are actually plus sized, not just like we have a 14, you know, like what are totally so Dorrit's are different, that the cuts are actually the same size person.

[01:21:45]

Exactly. So it is amazing for that. HSM does some plus and I love him like I get some. Great. Great. Yeah. And fashionable. I mean they you know, if you have a really small ways but your butt is literally plus sized and like fashionable should be your best friend. What else. Anthropologie like I said. And then I do. Yeah. Anthropologie has a whole plus sized line. They actually have a lot of their stories.

[01:22:15]

Have it in store now. Oh good. Yeah. Loft has certain stores that have plus size store and then I really I'm a Nordstrom girl just like always have been. I have a great relationship with them in Atlanta when I was doing more in-person stuff. But they have a really solid plus sized section for sure. And Nordstrom branded items, you know, they have their own labels and they have some good plus size labels. OK, and then I just I mean, I think of Hannah McGrady and the fab latex.

[01:22:46]

The Fab Lennix has a whole and we worked with them, too. But Spanx can't live without Spanx leggings. If you don't know, you need to know. And me personally, I didn't mention it before. I wear a ton of and picks out a ton of zah stuff for me and it works really well. It's one of my favorite brands to shop and it's affordable. OK, so we have a little segment prepared for you, but we can't not ask about date date clothing, so I don't even know the so broad.

[01:23:09]

But like I mean everyday tonight you're about to as soon as we see somebody for cocktails. Yes. Yeah. Your long term boyfriend. Somebody want to impress somebody you haven't given up on yet. Yes. Right. So I'm not going right. I'm going on a first date tonight with a stranger. So like let's talk about date looks. So I love to do a dress from the ground up kind of thing because I literally like where am I going?

[01:23:31]

I'll look it up, OK, if we're going on a patio and it's going to happen, it's so specific. But like if it's going to be wooden, you know, things and I'm not going to wear stiletto, probably I wear stiletto anyways because I'm just like, not that that, you know, unless we're going to like cocktails that are like a really fancy place. But I will say, OK, what shoes am I going to super confidently and I love this, you know, really started from the bottom.

[01:23:52]

Now we're here. Yes. Party that's outdoors and you are in a stiletto and you're like, I don't know what to do.

[01:23:57]

Yeah. I don't know what to do. Yeah. Yeah. So like when girlfriends will text me and be like, what are you wearing tonight. I'll be like, here's what shoes I'm wearing. I'm wearing combat boots, you know, or so I kind of go that route and I live in west midtown in Atlanta. So for my dates I always am like, hey, you can come meet me over here and I'll walk. So I'll usually wear like a wedge or something like that and then girl all about your assets.

[01:24:19]

So, you know, if I'm feelin like man I bollix looks amazing, like it's my favorite pair of jeans and it's a top that brings balance to my body. I cannot stress that enough that body balance is the way to a man's heart. Like really like showing up and being like I own every single part of who I am comes across in the way that you dress obviously. And then can I give a tip? You tell me. Hum, right.

[01:24:43]

Yeah. You're the expert here. You can have a outfit that you wear on every first date and there's nothing wrong with that. Like I feel like I have that one body suit that's really low cut and it's not it's shows my full like sternum and chest a little bit. I got to be it, but I'll wear it with all literally wear it with jeans, like ripped jeans and like I can do a heel or a boot or I can wear a sneaker.

[01:25:05]

So it's like I've worn it on most when the weather's appropriate. I've worn it on most first dates and I got to a point where I was like, am I just like playing this out? I'm like, no, it's a brand new guy. Like, it's the best I look. It's it's the most flattering and it is my go to first date outfit. So I think that's a tip to of like that's what I wear in first dates in the winter.

[01:25:22]

In the summer, in the fall, in the spring. But like have it just ready to rock. So you're not like I have a date tonight and like what am I stressing about. Yeah. And and I think that it's my favorite part of like what I look like kind of changes from like month to month. I'll be like, oh like right. You know, in the summer I'm like, man my my arms look great, like I'm going to do this.

[01:25:41]

So I will pick my shoe and then I'll be like, hey, literally what I want to highlight. And so as cheesy as it might sound like really looking in the mirror and I say that like with a loving gaze and being like, what do I love about myself? How do I want to, like, honor who I am and step into this like I love this part of me? And no matter what, like the person that you're on a date with is going to feel that from you, that you're honoring yourself because this is really about restoring dignity to the way that you show up.

[01:26:09]

And so, you know, when you have it, you know, it's like I'm sitting here thinking, why do we wait so long to do that?

[01:26:17]

But also, like, I love that you said that it can change. So, like, if it's summer and my legs are super tan, I'm doing shorts and I might do like more of a t shirt as opposed to like a crop top and shorts. And just I'll be out here. Almost naked, which is also fine to live your truth, but like, yeah, what you're feeling that moment of like here is what I want to accentuate tonight.

[01:26:35]

So I feel sexy and I feel confident like that's the answer. Lillian, I love you so much. I mean, I have I have clients that like, you know, say I don't really go on dates anymore because I have nothing to wear. And I'm like, that's actually one of the initial questions. My best friend was like, don't forget to tell them about. The question is, I actually asked people whether they're single, married, engaged, been with their partner for 30 years.

[01:26:58]

I'm like, what do you wear? And date night? Because it's kind of this indicative. It's the thing that shows me most how people feel about their bodies, because it's, you know, you in your mind, you're like, oh, my husband or my partner or whatever they like when I wear this. And I'm always like, what do you like? Mean that like, what do you want to wear? What is what do you feel good in?

[01:27:19]

And then we can you know, again, if we don't know what this person's personal style is, that we can kind of sort of build a story around like, well, you said you like this and you feel good in this. So like, what are this? As I always say, this sidesteps what are the other things that go with this thing? Like what are the bodysuits? OK, so you always do this deep V bodysuit. OK, let's do a really fitted turtleneck for the winter.

[01:27:41]

I just love that you said that people will not they'll stop themselves from dating because they don't like their clothing like one open the closet. I have open on my closet and really had like a minute where I'm like I don't want to do this, I don't want to go out. I don't feel good about myself. I don't like this. I just I feel really upset and like I feel like if you're confident, you couple those date outfits, you're like, I know all the banging is like that will make you want to date more.

[01:28:03]

Yes. And like, go go shopping and then get on bumble bee. It's it's a turn on.

[01:28:10]

It's what is it. Aphrodisiac for me. Male friend. What's your go to outfit.

[01:28:16]

I like it to be summer or summer. Winter. I like in the winter. I like like a ripped up blue jean like a light blue jeans. Just a black box. Yeah. I like a scoop neck pretty much. Or a V neck. I don't wear a lot. I want to like elongate my chest a little bit like my, not my sternum because you'll never see that competitors are pushed together. But I wear that a lot. I like what I know that some people like.

[01:28:41]

Do you want to make themselves taller at five feet? I'm fine with my height. I feel comfortable. I shop in tennis shoes all the time. Yeah, I love like white white sneakers. I'm wearing like white vans right now. I would wear these on a date, but like just a black ankle boot and I throw on a jacket if I feel like I don't want my toes maybe like on display that much. And then in the summertime I'm wearing white kids and kind of shorts and a body every day.

[01:28:59]

Yeah. Like I just don't dress up that much for days. Yes. I want to show up the best version of myself, but I still want to show up as who I am, you know. Yeah. I'm, I'm not like a crazy sexy dresser, you know, I don't need to do that. I want to bring that energy on a first day because I want people to see I am. Yeah, I just love this. Like, start with the shoe thing.

[01:29:18]

Like the guy tonight I'm going out with is like the first day. Yeah. Thursday it's all here like this. What we're doing, this is what you get and every time you see what's underneath. Hey, hey, hey. Yes. OK, I'm just thinking about what Schuett this guy six six.

[01:29:32]

So we can do whatever. Honey, I just want to point this out to our ladies because this is this is a little tip that like seems to change lives if loose, then left like my sister being as tall as she is, if they lose weight, then lift. So it does not matter how tall you are. If you are wearing something that is Gargantua only loose, then you need like the slightest platform, some little heel, something to just I literally say, like, pick your ass up off the ground, you know, like because otherwise you're going to look like you're melting.

[01:30:02]

It doesn't matter how tall you are if you are just going so, so, so loose. The other day I wear the widest leg pants in this massively oversized shirt, but I brought the garment closer to my body with jewelry so that it didn't look like I was all the way out like a foot in front of me. And then I wore platform sneakers because you just need to be picked up off the ground ever so slightly. And that's something that I see women there.

[01:30:24]

Like, I never knew why this didn't work. And I'm like, because you didn't lift and you didn't bring a focal point in me for tall women to when things are just, you know, if it's not available and tall and it's a little bit shorter on your leg than you'd like it to be, you know, to add that ankle strap in, it actually brings the leg like closer to your foot. I know that that's weird to say verbally, but like, no, I get it because I don't wear that stuff because it truncates me.

[01:30:48]

Yeah. So it is truncating. Yeah. So if you're tall, I got it. Yeah. So like regular length pants on me, they can be cropped looking so like I'll always wear like an ankle strap or a booties because it'll look like it's like kind of creeping up to my calf.

[01:31:02]

OK, we can talk about this forever. Now I love this. I know we'll have you back. We'll do its part to just talk about lingerie. I like I wanted the whole lingerie thing that we really started on, which I think I know we'll have you back. We'll do a laundry list of things. It's only fair. It's kind of like that. You don't know the content behind a pay for a paper content. They are. Your listeners pay for the content.

[01:31:28]

OK, so we get to have your. But we did want to play a little game with you. We decided specifically for you. I've never done it before. Huh? I have a name for the segment I'm ready for. I actually have a lot of the segments. All right. Ready?

[01:31:39]

It's called he showed up and he showed up in what? You can do it. You didn't know this better than can you do like the Khateeb? You know, the way you can do that. Like, I was so jealous. I know I can't do it. So if you guys have a guest, we are playing and we asked our listeners things that men have shown up wearing on dates. And we got so much funny stuff overwhelmingly. And actually I was like to pick out the really unique crazy stuff overwhelmingly, a lot of camouflage, a lot of cargo shorts, a lot of a lot of flip flops in the winter time, a lot of crocs.

[01:32:16]

So no dudes are really showing up and Jesus sandals and cargo shorts for days. But I mean, I just said I go to my date much older men and it's still a no. Yeah, I work kids on most of my dates, but I can wear anything I want. You know, the male flip flop debate. Is it weird to me because I went to school in the south where, like, every guy wore rainbow sandals, you know what I mean?

[01:32:35]

And then you move to New York and you're like, oh, my God, a man, a strong sandal. Go home, put your toes. I mean, your toes trying to get herpes on your feet. But it's different now. I feel like, OK, yesterday with this guy, OK, on the bottom, he on jeans and loafers. Nothing crazy on the top. He was wearing a button down shirt with an embroidered hunting scene across the chest.

[01:32:58]

She gives more details on the right pack was a man of the MUSKAAN. On the left there was a couple of deer and some trees trying to get some explanation from him. I commented nice shirt to which he said thanks. Didn't offer any other explanation. Oh, you know what?

[01:33:17]

I just want to know what state this is. Just like I like a lot of a lot of this was in the south Alabama. This one, I'm sure. OK, button down shirt Dresher, button down shirt leggings, it or not good right now. So she says leggings like I did a little tuck French talk with the leggings. I'm wet.

[01:33:43]

Maybe some euge slides of you were nagging like running leggings, running my running hat and yellow sneakers and that's how we show it to meet my friends last date dress shirt and leggings on a man.

[01:33:56]

I'm crying. I can't think of this. Was he like trying to break up with her girl? We have no more information. These were short moments. I know. I want there's OK. Since you you brought meeting friends, came to my apartment to meet my mother in shorts, no shirt, bare feet. My mom would have been like, hey, covered in mud. What girl. What girl. What where is he coming from. This honestly I will say this kind of sounds like her fault.

[01:34:24]

He probably was like, I'm coming from a hunting trip. She was like, come over. Yeah, just take your pants off when you get here and just be in your boxers in mud. I know a guy I used to date. He lived in Charleston. He worked at the psych ward for like I forget where we there or something. And he married this guy, walked into their place of business. I was like he was wearing a shirt.

[01:34:43]

And my ex said, you have to wear a shirt to come in here. And he went back, go and this a truck and put on a life jacket. That is the South Carolina shit right there. And I can say that because I'm from there, I know why. It was one of our main jokes for years of, like, this guy wearing a life jacket. OK, I love this one because I love how she she must have found out.

[01:35:04]

She said he came Comando in khaki shorts and cheap flip flops for a winery. A fucking winery. OK, how did you know he had tomato? I tell you, I want to know. She's like he shut up. She's just reaching for his dick. And there's somebody is it took a turn. Cargo shorts, a polo rope, necklace, crocs, body glitter. Why? Where are they going? Not as definitely body glitter, where though, like, I can't see nothing else.

[01:35:42]

You guys ever hear me on that one? Because I felt like I was like, OK, Brianna, I feel like this is similar normal and I keep it normal outfit, but with no normal with she's crying, but with a single Mardi Gras beads. I'm already on his way around his neck. OK? Why he singled out one purple Mardi Gras. What is going on? OK, OK, this girl said he lived in Minnesota, so it is called he wore three to four layers plus a jacket to eat indoors.

[01:36:30]

He was dripping in sweat. I'm picturing Joey Tribbiani when he walked in wearing gloves.

[01:36:38]

OK, I feel like I can smell that. She writes, No, no, like a kilt and I love looking at it, but at no point in time during the date that he referenced said kill.

[01:36:49]

I love it. I love kill. Oh, my God. He did it. Oh, my. I no acknowledgment of Presbyterian heritage and get out of here, OK? He wore a bike chain as jewelry that he made himself. Oh my God.

[01:37:02]

I dated a guy once that made my brother jewelry for his birthday and my brother like looked at me after he received the gift and was like, I'm out. Your brother's hot. We got a lot of these basketball shorts plus socks and sandals. No, no, stop it. Now, that is it is the fourth date out, but nothing says I don't respect you more than that. The to date, I feel like if I come over to their rubber duck on a date, please fuck off.

[01:37:30]

Come on. You're trying to get inside of me. Wear a pair of jeans. Do not roll up in a public place in my shorts. No, stop it, Trevor. I hear that you were like some girl wrote Adidas tracksuit like and I'm like, that's fine with me. A matching Adidas tracksuit like that's hot guys. There's more Mardi Gras kind of hunting stuff. I've seen some capes. Oh, there's been cake. Hey, Capes, what's up, girl?

[01:37:52]

We don't know what we are doing. A little other information. That's what I told. I was like, we should provide longer emails, but these were better. OK, he came straight from duck hunting to our date in a fully dirty camo and his face paint was still on. No, like he's like he just didn't wipe it off. No. Yes.

[01:38:11]

I like to think that, like, I'm going to show up and look like Braveheart are like, what are you looking for? Like I'm going to be this warrior that kills animals and it's going to be sexy. Gross. OK, this one I love ninety degrees out guys. So get a visual in corduroy pants. We're not even done. Does that even exist in NBA Jersey. I beanie why this sounds fake. This doesn't salary. And then she said and I kid you not.

[01:38:41]

He was carrying his chihuahua because it was too hot for him to walk and I respect that in his I, I'm like dying to see the shoes on that. But OK, that's because you dress from the ground up rainbow sandals. Yeah that is fucking crazy. Some of these I knew he was wearing more eye makeup than I was, which was unexpected. Are these real, I don't know, swim trunks in Celltex, Jersey for a dinner date. Oh my God.

[01:39:07]

This bastard shit. Right? I was thinking, like, I don't know if would you like in Dewey Beach in the summer?

[01:39:12]

And they showed up in that cowboy boots and athletic shorts. But this this girl, she's the same one. She's one of her dates was orange baggy Jim t shirt, red basketball shorts and fucking sandals. And then she said a different dude from the last dude.

[01:39:26]

I said just he showed up in the most feminine cardigan mag I had. That's bold.

[01:39:37]

Her first day. OK, got to go. Pretty sure that's maybe he was taking cues from Larry David. You see you see GERB. Yes. It's trying to go see the bar. Yeah. Yeah. He's like, if I wear my bag I don't know what to say, but that's a great move in New York. Nobody wants to wait on you.

[01:39:54]

Wait, I got to read.

[01:39:55]

You guys want a t shirt from. Just buckle up, OK? A t shirt from the local Harry Potter fan group. Meet up that he was just coming from. Man he came from Harry called from Potter Con. Oh, my gosh. Like, you know, a lot of women are into that. Gryffindor Yeah. Yeah. This girl said I wanted to date the guy and I showed up wearing the same sweater.

[01:40:18]

Oh, I love that one. Hello. That's that's literally what happened. So the last guy I like dated dated in March. Yeah. So he I think I've mentioned the podcast, but he approached me at a comedy club and he was like, hey, nice outfit. And we're wearing the exact same outfit. And it was I mean I was wearing leggings but black, he was wearing black jeans but he was wearing like pretty snug. So black leggings, white sneakers, exact same pink hlm hoodie, exact like we've compared.

[01:40:45]

Not crazy. I love that it's at least he it because I too went on a date where I almost almost wore this is even crazy. It's not just like this and I'm like Mass-producing I should have wanted it. I was wearing, I was wearing a band t shirts for a minute and I remember that moment I was wearing like, like shiny leather, shiny leggings, leather jacket, Kuban t shirt. I switched watchband t shirt I was going to wear on my way out the door and I showed up today and he was he was wearing the band t shirt I had just put back into the closet.

[01:41:13]

And I was like, this is fucking crazy. I literally had that shirt on today. No response, no response. He he just didn't say anything. It just didn't resonate with like I feel like he was like, huh. OK, anyways, what an Aluf. All right, we're going to end it on this one. This was an email we got. This girl says, Hey girls, on the podcast, all the Shakuri coverage, very enticing.

[01:41:32]

Anyway, she went on a date with a guy at an amusement. And he showed up in leather pants in the middle of August during a heat wave. She said he refused to join me in the water park and was visibly so uncomfortable and moody, but also refused to change. It was the worst date ever. 010 recommend leather at the Muse to change like it. Don't sell a bathing suit at that entire water leather at Six Flags. What or how?

[01:41:57]

I wanted to end this segment. I'm uncomfortable just thinking about it. I just again, friends. I picture Ross Keller in the leather pants episode. No. OK, thank you for joining us for he showed up in London.

[01:42:11]

This has been such a treat.

[01:42:13]

People are going to want to know where to find you. I'm going to keep you on last time and say you give out a ton of incredible information, tips on your Instagram and all that for free. But as far as working with you and using your resources, let people know specifically how they can do that. So you don't get like a ton of DMS, you know. Yeah, yeah. So on my website, LILLING Charles Dotcom, there is a whole page of offerings and really I have found that my clients get the absolute best results, which is what I'm after for you with working in an ongoing relationship.

[01:42:45]

So I have a six week program called Style Expression. It is a figure out where you are, figure out where you want to be, look at your ideals, check out your body type. It's your colouring, it's your brand. It's cleaning out your wardrobe. It is letting go of what doesn't serve you. It is shopping. It is a lookbook. It is using everything that you own. It is energy healing sessions. It is outfit making sessions.

[01:43:07]

I mean, it is like let's not just half assed this thing, you know, let's go offline. So that is my baby. It is what I have been grooming all year. I'm so proud of it. It is read the reviews. They're amazing. And people, will they get the closet like I have. Like that's part of it. Yes. So which is just. Yeah, it's so fun. She's she's like, I was in here cause I'm like, what is it.

[01:43:27]

Yeah. Yeah. And then any time that you shop, you know, outside of the six weeks, you know, as you every time that you get like an email receipt like, hey, you just purchased this thing, you get to continue to add to your wardrobe with new clothes, like you get to just add and I call it the share closet from Clueless. And then all of a sudden you have this incredible digital closet that you're always building on to forever.

[01:43:48]

Yeah, it's it's a treat. Braininess one. Yeah. You do need one. Yeah. Let's wrap this up. Yeah. She's like, can we go. And then I have an incredible course called the Holistic Closet Cleanse and it is for that person that walks in and is like super overwhelmed or just very uninspired or I've been saying like twenty, twenty is a year to kind of progress and move forward. But first we need to clean out and heal, kind of like what's already come to pass.

[01:44:16]

So if you've just been kind of uninspired at home for the last eight months, this is definitely your jam. You want to go and you want to, like, just kind of comb through everything that doesn't work for you. It is self study. You can do it a billion times if you want. You can do it in six weeks. You can do it in one day. It's amazing. That's a holistic closet course. The number one thing that I recommend after holistic closet cleanse is my wedding wardrobe algorithm.

[01:44:43]

It is a quick 30 minute video tutorial of literally how to put outfits together no matter what your style age.

[01:44:49]

Oh, my God. Yeah. Like, what are you like? You're like Tony Robbins. I'm doing anything with my life, so.

[01:44:58]

Yeah. And I share, like, all kinds of stuff on my Instagram all the time. Tips like tricks. How to get out of your head. I think that's like the number one thing that I want people to know is it's not about your body being wrong. It's just that you haven't found anything that works for you, just like relationships or anything else. I love that. And one thing we did get to talk about, we said this last night about a friend of ours who was working with you.

[01:45:17]

She was like she moved and she was like, I'll work with you when I move. And you said, no, you should work with me before you move. So you get rid of all this shit. You don't take it across the country with you. So people are moving. You're doing life changes. Like what better time to cleanse? Like, why would you call all your old shit with you? People are like all moving in with my boyfriend.

[01:45:33]

I'm going to work with you. Like, once I get a new you know, like we are moving in with fresh energy. These are the things that we love, like putting our best foot forward. And I just really hope that people feel that for twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty one forever, that you always have the opportunity to turn around whatever it is that you have going on in your life. And it starts with you, it starts with your choices.

[01:45:54]

It starts with how you show up so well. And where did you get your Instagram handle. Oh, I'm on Instagram sometimes it's like daily all day.

[01:46:03]

Great video. I think you Instagram is Lillian G.R. a why Charles Lane. Great Charles with an A must be nice to have the coolest middle name ever on. I know my mine's pretty good.

[01:46:15]

OK, my website is the only Charles dot com. Amazing. Thank you. We love you. Love you guys. Well you know where to find us girls. Got a podcast. Dotcom for merch. I get those tickets to the holiday virtual show.

[01:46:29]

Girls got to do the work a. Girl's got a podcast on Instagram, Ash has invited Greenberg on Instagram girls and her score got beat on Twitter and YouTube. Dotcom slash girl's got to eat and we'll see you next week.

[01:46:43]

How are you? I.