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So my drinking got out of control when I got money and then happy. Yeah, that's the clip.


That's the clip when you fucking advertise this part. Yes, that is the clip. It. That was fucking perfect. That going after the. Hey, welcome back to Hotbox, and I'm Jeremy Piven. And I'm Mike Tyson, and we are honored to have the great Bill Burr here with us tonight. Smoking a Cuban living his dream.


This is greatest. This is the most cameras I've ever seen on a podcast in my life. And you've got you've got cameras and people. You've got your own podcasts. You're a big shot.


I know. But I do it. I do it. Like, I just have, like, a little mixer and I don't do it like this from Bill. I grew up outside of Boston. Safe suburbs. Yeah, super white cul de sac. Street hockey can't mess.


Fuck Whitey Bulger, baby. Yeah, no. See, that was Intel. Yeah.


That's what all the places, all the place where they make the movies.


I was not from there, I wasn't from there. All of those, all of that stuff that they've made, all these great Boston movies.


I was in the safe suburbs so Mike was asking me your breakthrough and obviously everyone's got a different take on it. For me as an outsider, it's when you got up in Philly and it wasn't going well and was kind of a massive tailgating party that.


Well, yeah. And they were great, you know, great comics that were up before you and they weren't doing well. And you just decided to call this audience out in a rant. That is legendary myth.


That's the myth of what happened.


What really happened was the first guy went up and he got booed. But it was the summertime and it was like an ampitheater. So those like seats then like lawn seats, it was right outside of Philly. And the first guy went up and I don't know, say the place hold 5000 people. There was maybe 400 sitting down. And then there was another like 200 just milling around.


And they were like, OK, is your first guy? And he just walked out there like, what the fuck? So he got booed. Then it was sort of like the tone was kind of set, but everybody was doing OK but wasn't having a good time because you saw the first guy get booed. So it's just like, oh, this is an option. So then like two, three hours after that, that's when I went on and it was after a break and.


I can't remember, not so long ago, it was hard. They showed some fucking weird video of a guy had pus coming out of his ears and some guy ate it and this other guy puked and then they started the fucking show back up again. It was gross.


And I don't even remember. I think Bobby went up and did good. And then Dom got booed a little bit. And then I went on and, you know, my first joke, I fucked it up. And that's why I started to get booed and then I snapped. But all of that shit of like, you know, I was like I was going to go out there and tell these people, go fuck themselves. And then I went out there.


I was trying to have a good set. Yes. Trying to have a good start. Didn't happen.


Was that you believe that you believe makes you different.


Oh. I don't know, and I would be afraid to analyze that, because if I did, then I would think that I would be thinking about that rather than just reacting to whatever was in front of me or saying what I wanted to say.


I've got information to do, conspiracy man. I am.


But I also am like, oddly, it depends on the conspiracy.


Will you tell me when you're OK? Anything you have to do with bankers that it's just like like if you started a Ponzi scheme or I started you start a Ponzi scheme, we're going to jail. But those guys Ponzi scheme gets to continue on and on and on. And every time it shits the bed and everybody loses everything, they do that shit. We're just too big to fail.


I know it's been a while since I got into it because I kind of became that guy that was bombing everybody out.


So you don't really want to buy me. I'm so. So how do you feel about the bank? What do you think?


I don't I don't think I'm smart enough to really understand it. I what I don't get why like, why does it have to be gold behind our money? Why does it have to have value? As long as I respect twenty dollars and you respect twenty dollars, why can't this just be magical paper. Like why does it have to be something behind.


It's all about control by the conspiracy junkie. No it's all about control. It's all about getting the most you can out of them and give them the life they deserve. It's all about slavery and the economics of come up. It's just that's what it is.


You do you think it's all about slavery? So then you would spend the day working in racially like you don't think it's like an airline with, like Sky Miles. You know how they have group one.


Group two, group three. I think that we're all diamond medallion. No, we're all slaves to something. We're all slave to something, some money, some of us. I'm a slave to these fucking things. I think with some cocaine we all slaves. Yeah we're all and they were born slaves. You have slave characteristics that makes us slaves. It's uplifting.


But but but Mike used to have that because you were taken advantage of and you've evolved and it's a different game for you.


Now I agree that, you know, I do agree that. But that doesn't mean it's over for everyone else. No, I only succeed when I help other people succeed. Right. If I'm the only one to succeed, then I'm a failure.


And how long did it take you to figure that out?


Like, is that something you felt you always knew or did you know some way? No way. And so when did when did you like when did that like, come on, let's wait around three years ago, my wife inspired me to liberate myself from myself.


Pretty much. How long was that conversation? That's amazing. No, I know because I'm trying to let go a lot of shit myself.


You can do anything whenever you want to. That's when things interesting about life. You could change your mind and change who you want to be whatever you want.


Because my thing is what gets me is this my, my my life's work is my temper and I eat a rage family tree.


But he figured out how to navigate that artistically. I think it's a little different than most who are talking about real life, like being not just up on stage at home. Like, I don't want to be flipping out, like I don't want my kids to be scared of me the way I was scared of my dad. So my kids aren't scared of me, which is the success so far.


But like I, I figure it out because I came from the sit down and shut the fuck up.


That's how adults talk to you. Yeah. Yeah. Oh is it anything. And I heard. Yeah. So I think that when shit does starts to not go my way I feel like no one's going to hear me. It's embarrassing to say this out loud.


I'm them. They call it Nahmias them. What is that. When you feel nothing you feel like you're not heard. Yeah.


So that can be literally trying to figure out the operating system on my phone or like my wife, if I say, hey man, we got to be there by two or three o'clock and we get there at like, you know, ten past three and there's that thing.


I don't know. It just I need some emotional training. I need I need a lot of emotional intelligence training. Well, I just want to go get emotional intelligence for people just like that. And that's, you know, slaves to their emotions. Yeah. Yeah, I know. I used to be one of those people.


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Right now, life is interested in being a conspiracy theory. OK, I got a conspiracy for you. All right.


I think that water in nature is the toxic waste left over from the last people that fucked this shit up. And then we grew out of it. And to us, it's it's delicious water. It's delicious.


And I and then I think once we're dead and all we're all gone, I think the next people are going to be eaten plastic, you know, like like it's apples and it's going to be delicious to them. I'm sure there's a lot of holes in that.


But there seems to be a couple of holes in the nutritional value of plastic.


That means that they'll live off the nuclear waste and all of that debris. So I know you don't believe me. I don't know your eyebrows.


His eyebrows went up like that. You don't know what your atheist's does that mean? I don't believe in a higher power.


That's what you you're speaking as if you don't believe in God.


No, no. How about I am confused with that right now in my life. Why is that? Because I don't think I don't understand why God doesn't take credit for his work.


I'm like, why does he make sociopaths and then punish them who say they punish them?


Well, going to hell and all of that, I'm Catholic. What did they tell you when you grow up? Listen, I used to be a Catholic, but listen, hold them up and then I go past the graveyard and all that crap. But when you look at the actually, what do you really think about God? Forget you. And what do you think about the elements of what it is?


I don't think he's mad and I don't think you get judged for what you did.


I don't think he told you.


You think in navigating your life now he has nothing to do with you being here, you being the funny man that you are. Yeah. See, that's the thing, because I feel that like if I do good things, good things happen. There's definitely these laws seem I think about religion is I think that people came up because they couldn't explain how we got here. So I think everybody has these theories that turned into religion. And then there's elements.


It's like if you're a conspiracy theory, you've got enough conspiracy. One of them has got some truth in it. But like I think all religions are inherently flawed because they were made by people who are alive. So they don't know the biggest answer, which is what happens to you after you die. So that's like the biggest guessing game. And I needed a whole new reprogramming. So what I wanted to do was I want the entire the other way.


This is all bullshit. People made it up. You die, you go into the ground. I went through that. And now since then, I had kids. It's just, you know, there's no way to describe it unless you had a kid. And I'm just like, there's got to be something. There's something beyond this.


This there's something there is something beautiful behind all of this control of what are you talking about with it has nothing to do with something like that, but it's nothing. We pull the curtain. Yeah. Yeah. Like this.


But don't you. But if a religion is inherently bad too, there's this guy, he's watching you. He's hanging out.


I don't know the sloth. I'm I'm with you on the bus. OK, how do you think we will be without it.


You'd think it would be better off willy nilly, you think, Mangena think? No, I don't think I don't think you need to go all the way the other way. Well, now there's no judgment and blah, blah, blah bullshit that I was at. I think that if there was a no nonsense, since you think it's so bad, you say, what do you think it should be?


No religion.


No, no, no. I don't think that I think there should be no Catholic religion. No, it's like you're looking at an old house that needs to be redone. You don't need to tear it down. You just need to upgrade it. What about spirituality, Mike, their spirituality, your connection with God without being in any one of these religions?


I don't know the spirituality, but spirituality comes from religion pretty much. It doesn't have to, you know, you know, so you don't. So you dictate your own show then all of all these rules and my rules now, though, I'm spirituality. So I'm pretty much I'm a prophet of some God since I'm going through a spiritual perspective and it's my spiritual perspective and I read a few lines in the book or something when I make up my own book.


People have made up their own book. But I'm sitting over here. I'm the Jewish guy. I knew it. You knew it. He smelled the Jew.


The janitor smelled the Jew.


It's a good children's marriage. No fucking way breaking balls. I miss it. Yeah.


I mean, like looking at you, your last special from an outsider, you're crushing it. You're saying you're fearless saying whatever, saying what you want to say. And at the end of all that and you're in London and you're relating to a culture that you don't necessarily have a great reverence for because you didn't grow up there. And at the very end, you're there with your kid. And that's what this will sound like. I'm I'm not kissing your ass.


I'm just being honest. But there is there's something about it that really struck me at the very end with the credits. And you're there with your kid. And it's that silhouette of you guys in the back of the Royal Albert Hall.


Yeah, it was it looked like someone I don't want to see who has it all.


But you've had figured some stuff out. Oh, I did. I did. I did know. I definitely figured stuff out. That's why I'm trying to figure out how to come back to a higher power thing, trying to figure out my temper and all of that. I mean, I just did something wrong with you. If you have a kid and it doesn't change you, it doesn't make you look at yourself and be like, well, I got a lot to work on because, you know, it was a lot of stuff I didn't like about myself.


And then when I had a kid, I was a kid. I feel like, yeah, I'm contagious.


And you think I was like, I don't want to I don't want to pass this shit, you know, you thought you could hide something and now they can now be like, think I have a temperament.


You can't hide that. Like if I was.


Oh, no, no, we're not hiding behind the cause of the temper. Well, if I could, I'm trying to figure out what is the cause of it. Oh, I know the cause of the brother.


I don't start that. Why am I mad? Why. I know. You know why. Why are you mad. Weren't you. Oh, yeah, but that's what I just figured out for years when I would yell at my phone, I thought I hated technology.


It had nothing to do with your phone. No, I mean, I'm totally honest. That's not silly. Do you know what it is? No. The thing is, you're more evolved.


You've worked on yourself more. So you think I'm where you're at. I'm not. So I'm learning shit from you right now. I'm not trying to be clever, being totally honest. I how many times I've said that I fucking hate technology. Technology kept me alive. I had a ruptured appendix. I don't hate technology. I just get frustrated with shit. And I have this you.


No, this is what you hate. You hate this fucking aggressive therapy.


Oh you hate technology and hate the phone. It's too light out.


It's the afternoon to go into my is smoking a cigar. I mean I feel like my last cigarette. Sigmund Freud a man Sigmund Freud. But I don't know if we should drag him in the deep waters.


I say this is a good cop over here. Yeah. Piven over here like tell you special.


I really enjoyed it. And you're like you know why you're angry motherfucker considered smoke a cigar. I'm like, oh my God.


Oh my God, Bill.


You know that Mike had a one man show. Did you know that? I loved it. OK, would you look would you love about it? It was a couple things that really struck me.


As performance and a sports fan were you were talking about you want to fight, I think it was Holyfield and you were getting hit by this guy and you said I was maybe this maybe this is an interview. I've watched so much of your stuff, but I think it was a One-Man show. No, I think it was an interview you you said you were going I was like, what the fuck? What the fuck, what the fuck? And I thought that was so amazing that you would think that I would be thinking like, oh, my God.


And this get me out of here. I don't want to be here. And you're just thinking, like, what the fuck is going on right now? Why is he hitting me? I'm not hitting him that you could be that clear in the middle of that when you have a world class athlete in front of you teeing off on you, trying to knock you out, that you could be relaxed enough to think what the fighting is about, acting and fighting.


But that's what it's all about. Like theCIA, the most relaxed act is the best, the most like fight at that moment. That's true. That's true.


And then the story you told, and I remember when that happened, was somehow you ran into the dude you were going to fight before you fought him and you punched him in the head and he somehow running after the limo or something like that. Like I heard the full story scream, Yeah. Oh, my God.


Like that to me was like it made when I watched it. It reminded me of like Charlie Murphy had stories like that where it was just like he just like this can't be real. But the details, you know, it's true.


That's right. I didn't listen when I was fighting on screen. Right. This guy, he was an angel to death.


And I was and I was wondering why I was hitting this guy. And he was really he was like, oh, but he wouldn't hit the ground. I was like, what the fuck's going on? My head is hurting me, right, motherfucker? Right.


And you tell them he's ripping it out of his chest. Yes. I hit my head with a shotgun without. Right. Right. So I get back in the car, I think. All right, let's go. And next thing you know, he punched the camera just like Jason. He got up and I'm in my car and he breaks. I'm going to roll for the time and he breaks the fucking the side view mirror the mirror with the side of the mirror.


Yeah. You know, I come in one minute, please. I go. I fucking beat the shit, boom. I hit him and then hit the fucking car. Oh shit. You know, people had to hear that shit like oh shit. So I got in the car.


So let's get the fuck out of here. But man, when I saw him, when he was awake and he just really fucked up the picture in the paper, I was like, why? I'm glad he didn't die. Shit. So did you guys ever talk about that?


Did you ever run into him again saying, oh, sorry, sorry about the curb next time I ran into him? Are you thinking that he'd be scared the fuck away? And he saw me. I'm in I'm hanging out. The people have like in Harlem, the people have the chill outside in the restaurant. He thought, you fucking bitch, you Cicely Tyson motherfucker in front of hundreds of thousands of people. I thought, oh, fuck, he's just he had no idea he's a born again Christian.


No. Back then he had no self-respect. He didn't care. He had a Jerrica last dragon. Come on. Remember the last dragon, the movie that guy had the Joker, you know, he looked just like him.


I think he had the last Jheri curl, the guy who literally Carl was great for boxing, because when a guy would take a stiff one, the product would come out of his head. Right.


Like in him. I know. That's a punch. Yeah. Sometimes you can't see shit, man. Yeah, I mean, Jerry curly shit.


So, Mike, you said everything changed for you. You were terrified and you were so scared and then you realize they were more scared of you and that empowered you. And what Bill was just talking about when when Evander was hitting you, was that one of the first times that you thought, oh, wait, maybe he's not more scared of me?


There was a moment where it flipped, and that's why you were like, what in God's name is happening?


I don't know what happened to that. He was clashing me with his head. Oh, shit. Then I was head butting.


You see where this punch is coming from? I seen this shit and dealt with it basically came from God.


It it was the first car you bought when you made it. I mean, a Rolls-Royce. Oh, that's that was the car, the last one.


And I was in the first one with them. How much does a side you mirror cost on a Rolls-Royce. Nine thousand back then. Something like that probably. We kind of deserved to come on a little way, maybe not the curb. I should hit the sidewalk. There's a little bit of grass. Oh, no, that's amazing.


Just so vivid. Like to fight. So like, I don't know. Do you know that's I actually learned a lot about comedy, watching a fight, one to fight this comedy. Yeah, I saw two guys spill out of a bar, I was walking home from a club and I saw these two guys spill out and they were, you know, posturing.


But you could tell neither one of them wanted to fight and all but all their friends were there.


So neither one could back down. So they were both scared. And I was watching it from across the street. I was crying, laughing, I didn't know anybody there and I was crying, laughing. It just struck me that, like, true comedy is like if you were experiencing it, it's not funny. But if you're watching it like this shit, it's hilarious. Like maybe I'll explain from like, truth is funny.


Like, their fear with them is is fucking fucking hilarious, saying it's always going another way. The one these guys have a fight and kill the guy and he has the family and people love them and he have to leave them now because of that one moment of ridiculousness that one can. I know.


But if you saw these two guys, that was not going to happen. They were built like me.


That was the guys who shop at the gas should never go to the bar again. No, they shouldn't. It was just too ego we weren't going to back down and they were just hoping the other guy was going to walk away and they didn't. And next thing you know, they're standing outside the bar with the Gap jeans. It was just funny.


So did you do you take that and run with it? I mean, you come in and they come in and the dog people. I can't stand the guys. What do you mean? Talk shit about people who that with you and do it in life. Most comedians stand up. Guys do what. What they can do it in life. Oh. I mean, I don't I mean, compared to what you went through, yeah, I had a nice I had a good time.


I feel that I mean, one of my I must sit there and tell you about the pain of my childhood up the shit you went through. I can't do that. Pain is pain. It's relevant. Yeah. You can't compare. Yeah. But you do what makes you feel better, you know, like you just see somebody you know.


I don't know, stand on the side of the highway wearing like a Christmas sweater, fucking begging for money, I saw this guy the other day. I didn't give him money because he had on the Christmas where I'll be honest with you, I just thought it was odd. First of all, his back to me, he was clearly counting money and he turned around his gold earrings on this Christmas sweater.


He was asking for money. And I was thinking, like, what kind of homeless guy has a wardrobe, like, appropriate for the holidays for him to come around and beg? So I didn't give him the money.


But I mean, you look at the perspective that you would have gave me if you want some kind of blessing from God, you know, that you gave and a good perspective. I did not think that on you only think about your feelings and yearning to feel and control your thinking is doing the job. I'm not saying shit. No, you're saying he was manipulating you. No way. I'm asking about what kind of people do what he does.


Yeah, I don't even know what I do anymore. I just did a tour standing next to freeways in Texas and did eight shows. No, eight nights, 16 shows. I had a great time, but it was like I felt like it was tailgating for the week. It was a way for tailgating. Huh? Why did you feel like you tell you? Because I was outside and it was cold. You know, I was wearing, like, winter clothes.


But you were performing outside. Yeah. Yeah. Next to highways. Like, so the first show was always during rush hour. So you had to like, yell over the traffic.


So heavy lifting and kind of like the early days, it was hard to get to lock in with them. Yeah. During the first shows the people. Yeah. Because you got to you got to hear what they had, where their rhythm is, then you got to get in with it, then you can take them on a ride and like it was like outside the skyscrapers and the laughs were kind of going up. So I kept going you guys having a good time.


And then their response was and then I had to be like, OK, this is one of these shows where I can't hear them, but I just have to know that they're having a good time. So I sort of slowed down a little bit and was able to get through it.


But I mean, but the positive side was it was the fact that people care enough about comedy are coming to my show that they would sit next to a highway. The plane's landing was like final approach to like love field and shit. People need to laugh now more than ever.


Yeah, yeah, I guess so. I mean, that shit was pretty funny yesterday, though. Do you love what you do? I do. And I miss it. I miss do it as much because it is. Yeah.


I mean I still do it as much as I can, but it's like, you know, one of the gigs I do, it's like it's a parking lot shows. So people like sitting in cars. So you kind of have to adjust to the rhythm of that, like, OK, they're flicking the lights. So I guess enjoying this stuff.


My wife like the drive to go see the show.


Yeah, it's weird, but hopefully this vaccine is going to work. We'll see.


You know, once I became my husband, I realized that I will perform anywhere, I will perform pig shit and only I have to be one person. Everything I have to be there. And this is that's what I get. I get so off doing that.


We love it. Oh, I'm ashamed. I do. Why would you be ashamed? I just want to be out there in front of people talking shit and talking about me and letting people look at me and all that's that's that's it's really interesting stuff.


But you know what you want, man show was good. Yeah. I saw Chapman Terry do it. Yeah. I think baby baby I think I could do that. He is so breathtaking. When he did it he inspired me.


That's great. Yeah.


Man, I remember coming to see you and you were having so much fun sort of going off script started improvising and he's got his wife in his ear and she sometimes sometimes if I'm playing with a good hand, they stop being the asshole.


Look in my ear.


I don't think I could ever do as I said, if my wife is not very tragic, my wife is hilarious. My wife would be making me laugh.


She would be going like, oh, that joke killed her. What do you think you're special now? She was you'd come up with something running commentary.


No. Yes, his wife is. Keep keeping him on track. Yeah, my wife is a shit. Oh. One day I must have did some. We're all good this year Leffe. Yeah. Out there. Yeah.


And then like you said, I must have did something, you know, you did something five years left me up there.


How did it go. I go a great cause I was like talking about that but it went great. But I can't believe she did this and I learned to memorize.


You could open with that and just say, usually my wife's talking in my ear, but I pissed off. So you guys are going to get a freestyle show.


They would have gone nuts because that's something that I learned early on, is you have to address the situation to some of the biggest things that she said that, yeah, no, any time, any time that you if you just address what is going on.


Oh, like they love it when it breaks the and then it feels like special like like, you know, you did a sitcom, you know, like they didn't like when you got the line right.


It's when you screwed up then they felt like oh man, I really am behind the scenes. If you just had a show like a taping and everybody like hit their mark and everybody said that line and it all worked, they like, you know, they didn't interact. I didn't get to see the screw ups. I could have just watched this at home. They want to see, like the the inner workings of it, like Kartika, why are you stand there?


You've got to be over there and you don't want to hear about it. Yeah, I've talking about some stuff now.


Yeah, I got to start a podcast network that is now turned into like TV and hopefully a film. I wrote a film with a buddy of mine and we're looking like we're going to sell it and it's all things comedy is going to produce it. And yeah, we started to do that.


I want to be a movie that was being filmed.


I would definitely get a part of me. Imagine me doing some shit.


Can I just tell you that, you know, I've been mixing up with my for a little bit and he is on time and he's ready to go and he walks in singing and, you know, I think he's ready to go.


He was an agent. Now, listen, just in your blood and he's saying, I can't shake it, can't help it.


You can't help feeling like, listen, you give a back end deal.


You don't you don't leave alone and you're fucking negotiating for his fucking apartment.


You Larry, listen, you appreciate the truth. I have to have his backing. And you know you know what, Bill? To be honest with you, I was I was pretty blown away.


That's what it was. I couldn't believe it was happening. Comes in singing earlier than anybody. But listen, you've got to work something out.


I don't want ten percent. But the greatest thing about a show like, say, like stand up comedy is it's one of the like if you go to prison, it's hard to get a job. But like, you can walk out of prison and do an open mic within the first week and people will put you on. They won't give a shit to that. They'd be like, dude, you should wear your fucking orange jumpsuit.


You killed somebody. We should talk about that.


I mean, funny, like they wouldn't give a fuck. I know you were laughing, you were fucking yawning over, you know, the mushrooms. I knew it wasn't just weed. I was just like, there's no way I'm taking a hit off of that. There's something going on here. Mushrooms, baby the shrew.


I'm fucked up. He's showrooming and he's wearing pants like he went riding a horse today. Like sidesaddle is some shit.


Don't be like my wife. My wife is like Dick Pageau mad at me like I'm working typepad. This is my wife is just my type fucking clothes should be like I told Mike he should come train with me and he said he's going to have to wear a jock because he doesn't want to have to hit the pads and have a whole situation.


I digress.


Might be my favorite podcast with my with my wife. You don't like my type clothes is the way you have to wear fucking tight clothes. My baby, this is me. Married tight. Closed. Well, with a very tight clothes. Absolutely.


So you never got into the baggy shit when it came out in the nineties?


Fuck no. I want to show my bowl, you know, like.


You know what I thought once baggy pants came back, I thought, and longer shorts, I never thought short shorts or tight clothes would ever come back.


Oh, they absolutely have to wear tight shorts even when he was boxing. Think about it.


Everyone else was going for the Jordans down to the knees, a box and do the sexy back. But they're not going to win one of the 30s tights and shit man building tight Versace suit with the 30 to the die.


Wow. Now, what is it about that that you like that fits your junk better than anything that it was made for me.


A little made for me. Yeah. Yeah. He made it for me. He made it was about me.


Baby, I've dressed like this since the fifth grade and it's beautiful.


No style whatsoever. That's beautiful. And hopefully you saved a lot of money by doing this using most eloquent way anybody's ever shit on what I'm wearing.


Oh God. You are saving a lot of money. What do you do with all the money you don't spend on clothes, Bill?


So might you want to? Because he is a master.


He really is. I hate to know he is. So he's just trying to get you in the film so I know what he's like. You still working it? No, I'm trying to get in the film, too.


I'm asking him about the film. I'm not pleased to be able to be in your film and show my acting skills.


You don't have like. Yeah, I never thought you would want to be. I got it. I'm already thinking of three different things you can do with it. Yeah. You didn't think you were going to get married?


No, I didn't. I when I was growing up being married, did not look fun.


I mean, nobody in my neighborhood looked happy. Everybody was just it was it was you know, I don't it was this is like pre self-help people. Just whatever happened, you shook it off, you buried it and you just fucking you know, and they just school they just kind of funneled you down something. I think a lot of people that I grew up, unfortunately, weren't doing what they wanted to do with their lives.


They were supposed to do it. Yes.


Is what they did is what they did. And then the reality of that hits. And you got, you know, people back then, everybody had five or six kids. You can't you can't pull the ripcord.


Great. Great. Some of those guys kids ran this country. The people back then suddenly had all those kids. I mean, those kids were not being leaders in this country.


So I wasn't shitting on their kids. I was just saying that it's tough to change a job or change your mind, that you could pull the trigger. To do what? To get married.


Oh, he had no power over that, huh? What did I do that I don't remember. But I can tell you this. It seemed like a mountain that I had to climb up. And it was like so many of the demons that you have because you get them when you're a kid, they look like mountains and then you realize all you do is step up on the curb. That's all it was. And I gave her the ring. She broke down and cried.


I never felt better. And I was just like, I should have done this forever ago. Right. And the fear of what I got Chaz Palminteri story for you. So it's a day I'm going to get married. And like most guys, I'm freaking out like, what the fuck am I doing? What am I about to do with my life? And so I was getting fucking nervous, getting cold feet. So I'm with my brother. He's my best man.


I go I go down the bar. I just need to have a drink before, you know, I do this shit. And he goes, cool. So we go downstairs and I'm at the hotel bar and I get like a Budweiser because I don't want to be fucked up at my own wedding. So I had a Budweiser. I'm sitting there and I look over the middle of the day and I look over and I see Chazz Palminteri standing there with, like for the people.


And I immediately thought A Bronx Tale. Now you can't leave when they close that thing and they get the shit kicked out of them. And then I got my head going, oh, my God, that's a fucking sign. I need to get out of here.


I can't go back. Yeah. Yeah, why? And I wasn't in New York where he was from.


I was in Boston. Why is he here. I I when I'm going to get married. He doing here. Right. Yeah. Yeah. The fucking thing. Why the fuck. Fuck.


I always wanted to meet that guy. Why am I meeting him right now. He's trying to tell me something and I had to get that out of my head. Thank God I did because my wedding everything that means I'm going to die and this means I'm going to die. I'm themen before I go.


What was it? When was the last one? Was the last time you remember you went somewhere. What? You saw either something or you saw a person and then you were like, this is a higher power trying to help me out. It's saying, Mike, no, don't do this or, you're know, doing the wrong thing.


This is just I thought about this person and this person somewhere else. And I'm in the city of this country now. This guy is right here.


Yeah. You know, that's weird. What the fuck they doing here? You know, I can answer this question.


I think this is what I think I had that last night when you FaceTime me. Yeah. He said, well, I was sitting there. I thought I was because I've watched so many videos on you in interviews. I forgot I was talking to you for half a second. I'm like, wait, he's talking to me right now.


You know, sometimes I think I don't need much of the happy days to think about. Somebody in my call has gone off and he may pull up on you in the car. He may call you what you think about him.


And he said, well, I was just thinking about you. And I think that's something that we have that we don't know and that we can't operate that can tap into whether we'll be able to do it instantaneously all the time.


Do you have that power? Who would you make? Walk through the door right now. Excuse me, if you had the power to do that, like if you if you had control of it, made me sick and you and you were like, who do you want to walk through the door right now?


My kids do. That's a fucking nicest answer ever for my kids.


And I wanna sit and talk to God. You meant you to make jokes and stuff. I want to pick Lee Majors personally.


You were saying that your fear is always worse than what it is. Oh, your fear is always worse than what it is all about.


You, your fear of getting hit. I have a question.


Would you find the code first or the boots? Oh, you're going to have to buy the book. Excuse me. I know. Like I said, I would start see conducting my flight with Samantha.


And you were with you. You're going down a different path and I have no idea.


It looks beautiful. Does it mean to have that type of color coordination on a podcast is incredible.


I mean, I thought I was crashing with the black. And you are. And what? The gray hair?


Self-deprecating, but you put it together? I did put it together right out of the dry cleaners.


Well, look, they show you all my coping with it. I shouldn't wear the jacket like you got to cover up again up. That reminds me Bonanza. I love the way, but that was the shit. Tight pants. I will fashion plates, man. Look at those pants.


Look like it went with that outfit and you said, you know what, I like those.


You guys broke it up. It's perfect.


Mike's got some we've got a lot going on as well. It's got you know.


Yeah. Yeah. You are a player player now. Do they send you at your level, do they send you like a rack of clothes and just go, Mike, if you could fit this into your schedule, because if you wear these shoes or this shirt, we're going to you know, they're going to sell a bunch.


Well, I don't know. They sell them with the clothes. It's not cool in Nevada. Ask them. This is what I want some people to offer them because they just I'm not going to wear. Isn't that weird, though? You can't afford shit, right, coming up, you're broke, and then when you finally make it and you can pay for shit, people just want to give you stuff that really that's entrepreneurship.


Not giving me anything, I mean, that's true. Mushrooms. Yeah, see, and they'll see all the angles I did sitting here with my sober mind. What's the best part about mushrooms, Mike? Are you the best part, the best feeling on mushrooms not being badgered with questions as you enjoy the hunt?


No, it just kind of the nature of the beast here, Bill.


And certain elements that you meet, sometimes it just doesn't judge you. You have to worry about being judged, but you can get bad mushrooms.


You have to get mushrooms. You just like this didn't take me where I wanted to be hunted. The thing. Yeah. So what's the name of this strain of mushroom? Anything we know the mushrooms, peanuts, coffee beans. And the mushrooms, I hear you. I was just waiting for the joke, you serious? That's what they call it. All right. I owe you an apology. I thought it was a joke. Hey, I'm Bill Burr for penis envy mushrooms.


You know, with these shrooms, when you want to get down to your kid's level or maybe talk to God, this shit tastes like foam, like that dirt shit of vagina envy.


Yeah, that's disgusting.


Growing up, bills reference for mushrooms is when we were growing up. They were dirty. They lasted forever and they were intimidating this territory. Now, baby, it is kind of cool.


That shit is once it becomes legal, then it gets way cleaner. They fine tune it. Yeah. Like weed stores.


What do you like doing the way I mean the Humpty Dumpty fuck buddy. Did you say I picked up because of my head. I see what you say and you don't see what you just did. They snuck one in after the bell. I saw the guy they were. What do you do when you you laid back?


What do I do? I kind of got rid of everything. Once I had my kids, I got to and I quit. Oh, young.


I started late. They drive me great. You know, I love them, Oladi.


I love them. One's going to be four and the other other seven months. Listen, I tell you some brother. What my advice. Enjoy it. No, I am and I am because that's why I kind of love. I love the pandemic because I'm not on the road and I don't have a lot of shit going on. Enjoying the hell out. I had a girl first and then the boy, which is great if you have the girl first because they are way more receptive to having a sibling.


Listen, man, where a boy kind of looks at a baby like this and they don't give a shit when they get like 12 and 13.


Whoa, then and then. Now you've got another person in the house.


I know. I know. I know girls trip, they take all the stuff that already happened, yeah, it already happened. She's definitely the good cop and the relationship. But I think that that happens with I think girls obviously, the kids get away with murder, with the opposite sex. So my son's going to get away with murder with my mom, my mom, my wife. The fuck was that? Oh, my daughter will get away with murder with me, basically, and then not to the.


Well, that's I think because my wife is sitting there going like, you know, she's that's a fake cry. But she she knows the thing.


So now now that's making me look at my wife like. So why do you know all these tapes? But subconsciously, hey, you picking on my baby, you know, I mean, that's her mother. What do you make of that? Yeah, I know.


I feel that because I like when she'll discipline her, you know, we don't spank or anything like that. But just because, like, she'll just be like, hey, you got to stop doing that or whatever, there is a twinge of me going like, yeah, I'm the same way.


Yeah. Don't worry. Yeah, same I just don't talk like that. Yeah.


She can do nothing wrong. Uh. And it's so interesting because we were talking before about the fact that you can get love from all these strangers and you can be celebrated and then you're looking for it from your own kids, and it doesn't necessarily come that way.


You know that that's the real deal, right? Our kids. Right. And then when they get they like when they see the bullshit in us that are people, they don't see that bullshit as the kids see when, not us and not performing. That's so true. I see that bullshit, the sense of. And so they look at you now. So it's hard for them to fucking, like, be jumping on you when they see these flaws going on.


Yeah, my daughter gave me that look at about 18 months. Yeah. My heart dropped. I was like, oh my God, she already figured me out. That's a hell of a feeling. It is anything humbling. She she was looking at me. I'm saying these people smarter than me.


Yeah. Kids might remember, been the aliens. Hmm. How do you know all this stuff? They also have access to a lot more information.


Know, but they know maybe way more than the breed to be the human being, a different breed of human beings. I know you think because they they can't walk and they can't talk, that they that the brain's working and they are just processing shit. They just don't have the ability to sit there and be like, wow, what you just did was really fucked up.


They just sort of look at you just like you guys got to look at your baby, just like I know, I know I'm working on it. Yeah, I'm working now. But the thing that I, I am I am happy about is that I apologize. I admit that I'm wrong and I talk shit out with my kid. My my son's not old enough yet. So I am my best thing that I like is my daughter is not afraid of me at all at all.


Which is she respects me but she's not a friend. So we still got that going for I tell my kid, you know, your grandmother, he said that to me, that she said to me your grandmother would be just as she did with my grandmother, that here my kids go, yeah, yeah, yeah.


Loving this boy.


That's what you're supposed to I mean, to a certain degree space that maybe I'm told. But that's not good. That's not right. That's not right.


I got nieces and they bust my balls in the ass. They crush me. Oh, it's it's pathetic. I took them over to Jamie Fox at a Christmas party and I brought Pearl over cause I'm trying to impress them because I need a win. I need a win from these girls. They brought me. I would have been impressed. No, I would have really.


I would have you. Let's go.


Let's go. Because Pearl took one look at me. We're walking in and she literally looks at me and she goes, Is Jamie going to be awkward the way you are when they walk in?


And these little girls are they feel like they're. What do you say to that? Yeah, there's no comeback for Venus. And that just really blew her mind. She trained with Venus a little bit and. Yes, really took it to see if you can believe it. My daughter said to me, I go, she goes, she just goes like, Dad, can I have this? Wherever I go, I go, how come you never say please?


And she goes, Well, because I'm smart and I know a lot about music. I mean, what the fuck that means?


I was just like, all right, what did you ask me for?


What's the name of this podcast? iPod. OK, they might you might you should have like a little mushroom in there, too. Neon mushroom.


Yes, I should. I really should. Yeah, absolutely right. Like a four leaf clover mushroom. Yeah.


Why not? I think that's cool. Yeah, man, what about peyote to do that peyote guy, the media. Did you try it? No. I'm told I see the total dollar this month, the total. You know, try peyote, no, what is it about you would say I'm not a peyote guy if you didn't, right? No, no, I never offered it to me.


I think I would like it because that seems like like someone like me who never trip or anything to someone to say he has some peyote. That's a huge leap for me and I. But I feel like if you already tried mushrooms, right.


I did some stuff that peyote is just small surprise to me.


Hey, what's Japan like? We say like family. Like family. Yeah. And does Tokyo.


Now, when I see pictures, it looks like a giant Times Square.


I don't mean in a bad way, but it just looks ridiculously vivid. I have no way of talking. Yeah.


And so what? Coming from America, women don't have no really do. Right. Women in different patterns from the past to the. Hmm, that's the thing over there. Yeah, yeah. You've got to interview the scariest place I ever went to Singapore. Yeah, because that was where, you know, the king, a young kid. Yeah.


And this is how I grew up to my mother was just like, well, they should. Those were the laws. That's what they should do. I just remember going through security and just thinking like I don't have any weed. I got I got nothing right. I don't have any weed. I'm still my wife. You don't have any weed? Nothing. And like, you know, you hear this shit like if you spit gum on the street, like you go to jail forever, which is it true that in trouble.


Yeah, but you can get in trouble, but it's not like they execute you or anything. But that was a squared. Plus I watched a video one time of somebody getting caned.


It is no fucking idiot to do.


Took like three. It was fine. And on the 440 fucking collapse sort of. And they kind of like hold he had to take seven.


Yeah. It's not a good thing to watch before you go to Singapore. That's not good for tourist. No tractions. Kibar, you later, Mike.


Thank you, sir. Did you call your shop with the Mandalorian?


Did they come to you?


Did you are you were using the movie to TV series on Disney, Disney, Disney movie? Well, if you like spaghetti westerns, you ought to check that shit up because Jon Favreau. Oh, my God, he fucking they're killing Rick Famuyiwa. They're just killing it over there. And I've always I always made fun of Star Wars, not because I really, really hated it. It's just I saw people excited about shit. And being a comedian, you just make fun of it up.


Yeah. Just make fun of it. Right. Is a miserable fuck going to fuck?


Not it's not.


It's like I used to be. Now I kind of do it more fun. But when I was a younger comic, when I was really angry, I wasn't miserable prick.


But so anyway I was argue with the angry comic to and that it was a joke and then. Yeah, he's pretty tough. Yeah. Yeah.


That guy that's when he's one of the best comedians I've ever see. Like his energy on stage is unique. There's no first time I saw him was at the Kowloon in Saugus was a Chinese restaurant like for some reason Chinese restaurants in stand up comedy in Boston. They just always had a room in the back of a room upstairs in this place that they had a room upstairs and with food. Yeah. And me and I think it was like the Chinese food.


Yeah. And East Coast Chinese food, too, which is the ship. So I went late. Great Patrice O'Neal and we went and watched him and we're just fucking blown away. There was nobody there was this weird thing with Boston comedy where you had this Mount Rushmore people that created it and they didn't leave, didn't want to leave, you know, and they were making great money. So you had to leave and establish yourself and then come back and then you could headline.


So he was the guy we were looking at, like, how did he do that? Like how is he still in his 20s headline in the Kowloon? Because that it just you couldn't you couldn't get that gig did not exist for our generation and he did it so well. All right. Let's go down and check this guy out, see if this guy is as good as people say he was. He was. That's what he was doing. You ever see Tiger's fucking his?


That was his closing bit. And he sounded just like a tiger and he acted this shit out. I just like the I remember the sonic like assault. That bit in a great way was just like. There was like that bit alone was better than what my whole generation was doing collectively when we watched that.


I was just like and that was one of those things when you saw a guy that good that it couldn't not have an impression on you, that you had to be like, do you think that's the biggest influence that was this comics in this certain sense?


And he's both Joe Rogan at the Kowloon and fuckin I mean, I'm talking like 94 was before I moved to New York.


I mean, Patrice went down and we watched him and we were just like, what? Not with us no more. Yeah. And so that is one of the roles. Charlie Sheen is something I the men's roles. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. That'll never not be said. That guy. Yeah. If he was still alive you wouldn't know who I was or a lot of other people because he was, he was, he was so good. But that was what made it great because he was so good you'd never had a competitive thing with them.


Like in order to compete with somebody they have to be somewhere within my sight. And he was just over the horizon. And just so when he went on stage, I just became you stop being a comedian. He just became like a fan of standup. And that's what Rogen did when I saw him at the Kowloon. Like, I stopped being like, okay, how do I get there? And he moved to L.A. I just I just forgot all of that shit and just started enjoying the show.


And, yeah, I just felt like I should have paid him because I was sitting there like an audience member.


And people are that way with you. When they see certain bits that you do like your helicopter bit, they look at that and go, OK, you're hitting that from so many different angles, so many different perspectives.


That's you know, it's funny. I flew with the guy that was the dude flying and he had seen me do the bit and he never brought it up. How are you? How cool is that? I had to find out afterwards. I rented this helicopter. I got a pilot's license. So we're flying up to crazy man flying up to do what I'm telling you. Once you get up there, you will be so fucking scared driving down the highway.


The highway becomes way scarier, way scarier. It's like nobody knows what the fuck they're doing. It's like we're all flying in formation and nobody has anything.


I mean, the same thing. Yeah. It's like, yeah, when you're up there you should see the technology. Then you can't believe how beautiful it is. Yeah. It's, it's insane. It's insane.


So yeah I like go up there and I find shit I want to go do with my wife and I don't want to drive through introspecting. Yeah.


So you're the kind of guy that likes to one the drilling drilling and don't know.


You know I end up getting into helicopters was conspiracy theory. Tell me. So I was reading too much about the Federal Reserve because you are doing too much because you can't fix it. All you do is just meet other psychos, not psychics and psychos. You can't tell me that you haven't met a conspiracy theorist. What? You're excited because they're into it, too. In about a minute into the conversation, it's like I got to get away from this fucking guy.


Well, you don't experience that. You, Mike Tyson, look like me with no fights. Yeah. People will bend your ear a little more than they are. All right.


So it was Mike Mike, I was reading up on this shit and I've eaten up on just how the whole Federal Reserve came about. The Woodrow Wilson shed his letter of regret. Well, yeah. And how they passed it when everybody had gone home.


And it's like now they wanted to put taxes on the robber barons. That's what taxes were created. That's what the federal guys for. Twelve families made the Federal Reserve, the the the tax, the robber barons like the Rockefeller, then the then the person that's got I thought they were the robber barons and they took control of the money, the robber barons, the wholesalers who put the robber barons and their perspective.


They need guys like Theodore Roosevelt to do that to make these laws. Well, that's what taxes come in 1912.


But if that's what they were trying to do, then if you told me that, then I would have never learned how to fly because I learned how to fly from reading that shit because I became convinced that the dollar was going to collapse.


The 2008 shit happened and they were just like, hey, go fuck yourself, were too big to fail.


So the collapse is just that. We will get our share. We like each make up something that's called taxes and we going to tax the robber barons. Their money won't get too powerful. All right.


Well, my version of it was I thought we agreed that that's why they did it. 1912, six families on Devil's Island. Shit. Yeah, I read all of that stuff. So then I wasn't. It was just. Families and you got to send me the link to read that, because the one that I had had, Devil's Island, which really made it more vivid that these guys met in a place called Devil's Island, but then it just seemed true.


It's why the Internet is really about it can be a great thing. You learn a language, you can do all this great shit. But if you just you know, you're a dummy like me and you get a fucking laptop, like there's no telling what you're going to watch and what what you're going to believe.


You think the government will create taxes in 1912, since 1912, then said nothing about taxes. Why do they sell something? We should make taxes. I don't know, man, I. I don't know. I don't I just whatever the fuck I read, it may be paranoid to live in L.A. and I was like, I can't even get out of this place when it works. So up and out. So you got on a helicopter.


Yes, she did. Huh. You got on the helicopter. Yeah.


And that was it. And then and then I was starting to get away from conspiracy theory and then I started flying helicopters and I'm sort of a closet gearhead like I don't how to fix shit, but I've watched everybody fix everything. I watched this guy, Eric, the car guy. I watch him, like, fix like a fucking ninety five Honda Accord. And I can't stop watching shit like that. He figures out the electrical, you know, and I just I don't know, I just watched the guy and he just makes it look so simple.


So I kind of got into that and a really poor science background. So the physics of flying and all of that, was this the biggest fear? The ocean.


Now, what do you fear more than anything, that ocean? Now, why did you just say no? Like, you know, we all felt I was like, fuck, like, you're in my head. You know what I'm thinking more than I do. I love the ocean.


Aggressive therapy. You just met me. You you asked me and I literally said it was the ocean. You want to go deeper?


No pun intended.


Father, so far, this is from all those years my size. I know this is from all those years I happened to size a guy up across the river. Exactly. Who like I don't understand how you don't throw up before this. You know, there's a guy just trading to fucking knock your brain into the fifth fucking row. And, you know, while you're trading that, that's what that guy's doing. How do you even go to bed?


How are you not just lying there, going, is he still doing more sit ups? Do I need to do a few more of these?


Like, no, no. Just not just in that phase. And what was it like before? Like in thirty seconds, I have to say somebody up before we fight the war.


My favorite stare down you had was Peter McNeilly. Absolutely. That fucking thing. Your head wasn't moving and he was sitting there going like this. And you just stand there going, listen, I gotta tell you one thing.


Your eyes were just going side to side and we all knew the fight was over. Anyways, one of the greatest guys in the world personally.


Right. You know, some. And after Biden, when they sent me to Harvard Medical Center, psych ward, pretty much, you know, the totem pole.


And so you see that going like I'm not I'm not crazy to fucking do this. I'm doing this head butting me. But that don't mean shit, man. I got to go talk to these people with these white jacoway. They give you the Jack Nicholson knitted hat from One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest.


You like, come on, put the game on the guy like the one. I'm the one guy. And then they got me and there were people fucking chickens and shit. Yeah. So I'm like, yeah, but often in my room. Knock, knock. No, let's go out baby, baby, let's go. I got four beds and right now I said, Pete, I can't, I can't take this test either. Now fuck I got to let go.


Wow. That's amazing. I wanted to go out with him so bad he look like oh that's so cool that you guys at one moment are trying to kill each other.


And then the second it's over, like you guys can just hang out time to make some money for our families.


Man. We both parties are really friends and we respect each other. We just put on the show.


Yeah, but that moment that he's talking about, that wasn't a show. I mean, you were locked in. Oh, yeah. We're fighting.


You were locked in the you could always pick it up, right. Yeah, but you could.


My favorite, my favorite is there like I know another guy would have been to a bunch of we have had to go to but we had these beautiful like the party. Another guy I thought he had a great stare was Tommy Hearns is pretty tough. Yeah. And he had that weird thing where he was like almost six feet tall, but he but he could make weight at like one fifty five. Who was that middleweight division like in the seventies. It was the heavyweight division.


I don't know much about boxing, but like the middleweight division when it was Duran, Sugar Ray, Marvin Hagler, my favorite, you know, because he was a Brockton, Massachusetts guy.


I'm sure he's underrated. Haggler, right? Oh, man. It's still kills me. I thought he won that Sugar Ray fight, man.


When he was sitting there going like this, why don't fight in Vegas to some blah, blah, blah, I just was like, oh, but but I also loved sugar and I loved all this guy, Roberto Duran. I loved that whole division.


And yeah, boxing was all those guys had one, as in the his career no one got away from.


And I do love that he when he said after that fight fucking I'm not coming back, I mean he's coming back, I was like, Barry Sanders, you know, you can easily go out in he's hanging out in there for a couple of times.


That's where he lives, apparently. Haggler Yeah. He came to see me fight in England. One third of the mean. We came to visit me when you fought Frank Bruno or know who won England, the English champion Bruno. Somebody in that fight for them over here.


How often do you run into guys you fought? And I don't mean the famous guys ran in the Franklin. We did some kind of commercial together periodically that much.


So might you want to do another one man show?


Absolutely. I die. So you got a guy who's one of the best writers in the game, fucking agent. He's putting together another package. I've just I was trying to. And if you don't want to go into it, that's fine. But I was.


Are you fucking kidding me? I do that in a second. OK, you came at me with, like, some stores and shit. I seen a One-Man show. I wouldn't need to.


I would just be like I would expand on this, expand on that. But like, his story is fucking ridiculous.


I does my wife all my life. I know. But actually the only one that could direct me. All right. I'm not going to be directed by you know, I'm a really asshole. No, but the great thing about Bill's journey is he could probably unlock different ways and different perspectives to look at your stories on oversell it now.


He's being very good. He said you were going to unlock some shit. You didn't unlock anything.


And I get it fucking yelled out, what do you do with your life? Like before the kids, you have friends. You go, why did you stay in close?


I did. I did. Before this. Before this shit happened.


Yeah, my my. Yes, I have. Yeah. I have a tight circle of friends that I would do anything for and they do anything for me. And we've had some of the best times ever doing, not even like just doing the shows. It was like the hands afterwards, you know, hanging out and talking. And we were just always we were drinkers. So we would just get like a tour bus and we do the show and then we would just, you know, we go to the Italian section in like Pittsburgh, get a bunch of Italian food, and we'd watch, like, a gangster movie or, you know, we just felt like getting fucked up.


We watch, like, Anchorman. We did, like, really just stupid clubhouse shit. And I got to tell you, I'm glad that that's the way I did the fucking road.


You know, that was the way to do it with all this bullshit that now.


I mean, when I was a young kid back in Holyoke, Massachusetts, Holyoke, Massachusetts, I mean, a that is I remember was hearing that growing up, I sure didn't already had a club out there. At one point, a shout out to Dick Doretti, Dick Dougherty, Dick Doretti, Durbin, already king of Boston comedy is very interesting.


I am. I was at the mushrooms. What do you think? It's got to be fifty fifty. They've here. Oh they did. It's got to be getting close. You took that last month. They had a cauliflower level of mushrooms that he took.


You know, just just because you're on a different wavelengths right now, you should do it, be very stimulating.


The thing about mushrooms is because it's not man made, it takes whatever you're feeling. It explores and heightens it as opposed to. So you've done mushroom. Yeah. Yeah. I like the way you said so I want to hear the story. Yeah. You know, I use you got more relaxed when I said that.


Yeah. Yeah. You felt it. This is an infomercial for mushrooms and you know what I'm buying.


We can buy and bro we got no skin in this game. I know. That's why it is because you guys are not making any money off of it and you're selling it like you do. So it's.


Well, you said you said to him, you know, when he said you're an interesting dude, he meant it because it's not like he's doing blow and he's talking shit and he's a slave to this manmade drug. He's it's just it just gets into whatever truth you have and it just kind of heightens it. Dude, you can't blow would be the greatest thing ever.


I look at my teeth and shit you I thought I know I can go back like him in a movie. All this shit would be great.


Oh shit. I never fuck with that, you know, was weird. Like how just certain drugs, like the stigma, like cocaine was always dirty, it was always in the back room and everybody had to be doing like, you know, you can take mushrooms and funny you want some. It's social. It's cool. Cocaine was always that.


Cocaine was whenever I came in, they were very sociable. Cocaine. Everybody had cocaine in. I mean, anybody could take cocaine, whether they be cocaine. Oh, that's. Well, by the time it came around to me, that's not the way it was. And I remember I don't want to get anybody in trouble.


96, maybe 96. It was that was like 15 years after the Big Lie, 96 cocaine. The Big Lie to remember that in the 80s they did the cooking.


Oh, no, that's successful. And they had the cocaine with Martha and we were enjoying it. Yeah.


Me, Mike, Mike, I'm not saying this. I'm quoting you. You're one of the only guys who could do cocaine and actually gain weight.


ABS very rare. Absolutely. I'm not that bad. Cocaine. Oh, you get the munchies.


That's not good. OK, I don't know what it was, but I got really large. I was the fat cokehead.


That's rare. That's like a record of fat everything, man.


What the fuck happened. He should do more than fuck. I'm not in effect.


All right. So if I was helping you, if I was helping him with this one man show, you got to build that out.


The span of about oh, no, you've got to do the show to do the this thing and then do the fat cocaine and then.


No, no, it's in fact I'm seeing the show, the picture. I should have Pejeta said, go, go. Oh well you see that. That's just we've seen the pictures Mike. Yeah. It's my that my show. I showed him the picture. Oh yeah, that's right. They have pictures and it shows I should have said crack.


One of the predominant feelings on mushrooms is just straight up joy and laughter. Correct.


I'm just feeling comfortable with you first, OK? You know, give you comfortability. Yeah.


And what does that say about you? That he had to eat that much mushrooms to get fucking comfortable with you? There's a nervousness to you, I feel.


No, no, you can ask, but it's it's traveling through the couch and it's getting it to me. I ask Mike, he'll give it to you straight.


You Mike. Do I make you you make him nervous. Oh no I not.


That makes him fucking talking about shrooms examining our brother. Yeah. Want to examine you.


You know, you go to a you know, when I got arrested for drinking and driving and you had to go to I had to go to AA meetings and and I immediately realized I wasn't an alcoholic.


I hear that because you went there and I was just like, oh, I guess this is where my life is.


I guess I'm like these people. And then people started telling these fucking stories. I was like, it's like, all right.


I drink these people. These fucking people drink because I was listening to the stories. I just was with every low point. I was just going. And then you quit and then you came here and ate doughnuts and it was like, no, I kept going. It was everything ended the same way. And the next day, you know, I couldn't find my teeth. And, you know, I was I was, you know, wearing pajama bottoms and, you know, I got there.


But, you know, of nine a.m., I was standing outside a liquor store, standing outside a liquor store, just trying to get the fucking. I'm just. So then they got to me. Do you want to share? It's like, dude, I can't fucking follow this. No way.


Yeah. Gives you a little perspective. Yeah, I just.


Yeah. Well, I also got busted so young I was like twenty one when I got to do this. I didn't get. Yeah. So my drinking got out of control when I got money and then it happened. Yeah.


That's the clip. That's the clip. When you fucking advertise this podcast. That is the clip. I thought that was fucking perfect.


Yeah. That can happen back. And there was so much fun I think. Oh my God. That was like another three. One man shows do. That's the name of a one man show that can happen. That can happen and then you just fucking launch into it. Yeah. You talk about being a fat cokehead. I've seen it. All right. You're going to get in on this going happen. They'll believe in the fact that that could happen.


Oh, this is fucking tremendous. I have had to do with it. You know, I'm grumpy. I was driving all the way down here. This is the greatest decision I've made.


So we're like, hey, do we to listen to that can happen is now in my fucking vernacular, that can happen. It just covers it covers so much ground to see me.


Homeless, beautiful woman that can have. That can happen.


That could happen to Mike. You have a great podcast. Oh no. This is a great fucking podcast. Cuban cigars. And that can happen. I mean, with the my day is complete.


I think about my kids. I look at you every once in a while and they'll just cut right through it.


Yeah, I noticed that within the first thirty second. I'm just waiting for it. I'm waiting for it. I love this is fucking beautiful, beautiful brother to my you see my father. You think the same shit I think. Yeah. I think we got here. I don't know.


But if I was on mushrooms, I would think that fight actually happened. Elvis Presley versus Muhammad Ali.


That's beautiful. Elvis gave him that real. Elvis was a beautiful person in real life. You know, he wasn't the person and people thought he was.


Did you ever meet Elvis, Mike? No. He died like seventy seven. Seventy seven August. Longest seventy seven. That's right.


You know, doesn't you know, he's somebody I care about for the dying seven. But we know he's just and I have you know, he died. I was a big deal about 11 years old. I remember that. Yeah, I was nine. But you remember that. Yeah, I remember they played him on the radio. My parents would dance to like his music in the living room and shit. That was a big deal. A lot of caddies at that funeral home.


Everybody loved him. He was a generous dude.


To Bill Burr, comedian baby made headlines in October 2000 and 2000 after controversy one on the dog. You know, my 2000 and 2000 Mike.


That's twenty twenty Brownsville schools went full term in 2000 and 2000.


Twenty one, twenty, twenty, twenty and twenty, if anything.


So it it's a backlash after that whole monologue. Speaking Billy Boy Billy. Oh, Mikey, I did mention to you did you a beautiful person.


She was funny, very funny. On my show.


I had actually thought I was.


That was that's all bullshit was that is OK. It was incredibly difficult to get that monologue because you had no live real live audiences to kind of workshop the material.


You kind of sometimes you're not friendly with people, you know. Yeah, I'm aware of that. I'm more defensive is what it is. No, but I don't like that they're happy to have you, man.


Thank you for showing up, too.


If I knew it was going to be like this, I would have been I would have been here years ago.


I feel like I'm skipping school right now. This is fucking amazing.


And it's a beautiful day. Yeah, absolutely.


I remember I skipped school one time. The Celtics won the championship. Eighty six. Right. My parents, I asked him if I could go to the parade and they were like, no, you can't. You got to go to school. And I was like, all right. So I just went anyway and I didn't wear sunblock or anything. So my face, I look like a fucking lobster. And and for some reason I went I mean, I was fucking shitfaced.


I was driving this pickup truck and I had like fucking twenty other drunk people in the back. And I went by this after I dropped him off, I went back to the school to get because I knew we had a test and I didn't have the book. So I went into my high school completely shitfaced and sunburned. So I'm walking down the hall in the middle of the fucking like I'm supposed to be in a class. So you have a hall pass.


I'm walking down the fucking hall. And of course, the vice principal who suspended everybody, Mr. Callahan comes walking down, I'm fucking shitfaced.


And I was just like, just hold it together. Just act like you have a pass. Just act like you have a pass. And I walked by him and I said I said I said, what's up? Instead of said, Mr. Carlin, I said, what's up?


And I was just like, Hey, how are you? And he just kept fucking walking because I was maybe thinking, like, this is a automatic two week suspension. I'm already flunking all my classes. I'm going to get Xeros and everything. My dad's going to make me even redder than I am. This guy makes make sure he didn't he didn't see one of the few times in my life. I just played it cool. And it worked, I think, because I said, what's up?


It's like if you didn't have a hall pass, you wouldn't have said that. But it was the alcohol. And then that started my drink. And I was like, I like I like me on booze. I say hello to people.


They don't ask for credentials. Lt worked Texas excuse me, Texas Tech. I know that when I, I did, I did a run of dates out there. I mentioned it about an hour ago before the interview. So much time has no meaning for my. There's no no I think this doesn't exist. Are you a sci fi guy. No, no no no no no. I'm not really into it either. I'm not unless it's like I like Blade Runner that went on the Swaffham.


They know that was with Harrison Ford or. Yeah, we have the first one. Yeah, first 173 early eighties.


But the Ryan Gosling wants to shit to. I have been checking the. Oh, no, I don't think you need to. You got penis envy. It's going to be very tough. That's going to be better than any movie you're going to watch is what I'm what I'm gathering from us. Hey, listen, I have to believe that you're correct. It's going to be some really movie shit going on in a few minutes. I don't know what that means, but OK, so beautiful, baby.


Just beautiful. Like the love.


I'm in I'm in covers about your mother, the father, where they come from and who are you, man? We disinfo from Hamas come from the Midwest, all of them. Yeah. When they moved to Boston, the Vietnam War. Really? Yeah. My dad was in the Navy and he got transferred. He thought he was going to Vietnam, but he was really good at what he did. So he worked at a head and neck team that worked on wounded vets from Vietnam and he got stationed at a place that doesn't exist anymore.


But his family now, you know, I met him, but he doesn't talk much about that. But yeah, no. Yeah, that's how it was back then.


So it was Chelsie Naval Hospital where he got. Stationed, so that's what brought them from the Midwest to. Massachusetts, which. Was ridiculous. How it worked out for me, because then I ended up growing up in what I think is some of the funniest fucking people in the world. In Massachusetts, everybody is just and just New England in general right now, all the way down to like New York and everything. I don't know what it is, but there's just I think there's world jam packed together and we didn't have the ability to have conversations like this.


So everybody just reacted and it was just hilarious. So the Vietnam War brought my family tree to Massachusetts. And then all of these guys, Lenny Clarke, Tony V, all of these guys, Sweeney, Gavin on all these guys created the stand up scene. And through all of that hard work, I ended up just being at the right place, you know what I mean? It would be like to do it would be like I would say, if you wanted to be a rapper and you were lucky enough to grow up in New York at one point when that was the place, not I don't know shit about hip hop.


I don't know. You know, it seems like it's Atlanta and bounces around. But if you were there at the right time and you just sort of get absorbed into that scene. Yeah, it was my life has really just been a series of ridiculously lucky things happening. But you had to be prepared for those that look those moments. I was told. I was told, you know, that. I mean, I don't know. I don't know this one.


You know, the harder you were to look here, you get there you go. I always told somebody, teacher, the harder you work, the lucky people did a lot of work to create the scene before.


I mean, you even wanted to do it. So but yeah, I definitely think that I would have had. But you had to be called to the scene, though. All this is you don't think you navigated yourself here, did you? Don't think. No, I fell into it. You fell into it just. Yeah, you sort of I sort of talked about fell into it. You fell into it. You use one to create the fall into this.


I don't know what you're saying. I'm saying that, like, I through dumb luck because of a fucking war that ripped this country apart.


A plus side was that my family moved to Massachusetts. And when I decided to become a comedian, I got to be in one of the greatest comedy scenes ever, the Boston comedy scene, and seeing these guys, Kevin Knox, rest his soul and all these amazing guys. And then also what I loved about Boston was what they considered an OK set. I found in a lot of other scenes that that was considered killing. And I remember when I when I would when I was bouncing around doing the road, it guys would say I was killing.


I was thinking, like, that's not killing Kevin Knox at next comedy stop. That's when that guy was on stage. It sounded like there was a jet landing.


When do you think you're killing? When did that come about? That I actually killed it?


I felt that you felt that you killed like eight years in. Yeah, eight years. And it took me eight years to not be moving around for no reason why he never quit.


Well, that's that classic stand up thing where they say if you're really going to be a comedian, is the thought of quitting never enters your mind because that's what a normal person would do. If you go on stage in front of a bunch of people and eat your balls, it's the most it's fucking humiliating.


You know, that's what I think about that. And life was thought of quitting and not even thought of.


Yeah. You know, something I don't like about commentors on boxing videos. I hate when there's a great fighter there for some reason, like I think a lot of times when someone a shit talking great fighter, people don't like the person and they want him to fail because it does something to them that they're thinking like because secretly they want to be that confident and they want to be that guy. So then we don't. So then they wait till the end of the fucking fighter's career, you know, when they when they lose and you see them.


I love this this fucking asshole. He's such a piece of shit. You know, I could watch this fight all day. And it's just like, dude, you're talking about yourself. You're not talking about this person that had the balls to get in there and deal with the fact that every year you're a year older. And so much of that is is, you know, with sports is some people live their life.


They can relate. Do people. Yeah, sometimes we shouldn't take it personally how they feel. I thought they lived their life full of life and focus and stuff. You know, we have to be grateful. You have to be grateful, Jeremy, myself, that we can make people we can cause people to feel that way.


Yeah, I learned probably about ten, twelve years ago I just stopped giving a shit what people. If they came up and they didn't like me and they would, you know, they come up to you. These had to let you know, you know, that person who just has to fucking let you know. They can't just be like, I didn't enjoy that. I'm not going to see him again. I need to go up to this guy to be selling my fucking CDs and bullshit the end of the show.


People would just come up to me, not buy anything. They just they stood in line to tell me how much they didn't fucking enjoy me. And I always just after a while, I just started seeing the humor in it. And I would just I would I would agree with them. I'd go I just would just start fucking with them. I do remember one time I did a few times I have felt bad. I was I was in Ireland.


I did this show one time and I was talking about that haircut. Your wife gets at a certain point where she's sick of dealing with their hair and she gets like that. She gets that that short haircut. And I go and the next time you're banging a doggy style, you feel like you're fucking your friend Eric.


So that was that was the joke, right? Mm hmm. I thought it was a harmless joke. So at the end of the show, I'm standing there, you know, glad. And in doing what I have to do because I love doing Stand Up in Ireland, I'm trying to build a following. So doing the meet and greet and, you know, I'm signing shit or whatever. And I look up and there's this woman, Irish chick, and she's got the short hair cut and she just looks at me.


She just goes, Was this the haircut you were talking about?


And I didn't know what to say. I was like, No, no, you look, I hate that I didn't say like that is exactly the fucking haircut I was talking about. I just felt bad because I could tell I hurt her feelings because as much as I'm a dick, I don't want people to feel that way. I want you to laugh at yourself. If I'm doing that, I would like you to look at me. I'm fucking get an orange beard and a bald head.


I mean, you're going to let me get under your skin will make you feel like you have to be a comedian. I just it's how I connected with people. I made people laugh, you know, who did you see?


Oh, you believe that to be a comedian. Oh, Pryor. Really? Mm. I remember buying my first Pryor album. I had no idea who he was. He just looked funny.


And then I lived with Blue Your Way. Yeah. And what I loved about him on families but yeah.


So what I loved about him was his bits were like movies and he could do all the characters and like all of his classic bits, I have a vivid picture of what the person looks like, like the crap game.


Mm. The girl with the big ass going Kiss my ass motherfucker.


Look I know what she looks like, how she's dressed in all of that and what the club look like, you know. Goddamn Hank, I know what the door guy looks like the way he did it. And I've always loved any performer that can bring me into a world that I've never seen and sort of make me see it. And it was why I liked Biggie when Patrice got that first Biggie Smalls album. And I love because I felt like I was watching a movie when I was listening to it.


And so I think that, yeah, so get back to it. That was why Pryor was sort of the guy. And then I bought the Eddie Murphy one, the one we had the rows behind his ear. And I literally bought that because I was like, well, this is another black guy. That black guy was funny. He must be funny to like, really, that's what I just thought. And I just bought that one. And then then I think I got a George Carlin that Toledo window box.


And I was like, who's this guy? And his style was completely different from those guys. Where didn't you get the confidence to believe that you can do this?


Oh, I be honest to you. It's just something I knew I could do. Everything else I had tried at that point. I just I could be I could only be good at it. And I would always be watching other people really just trying to do what they did in comedy was the only thing that I as much as I learned from people, I kind of knew that in this weird way, I kind of knew already knew what I was doing in a way I knew that there was when you born to have not the success of the life of the group.


When I still had a day job and there would be like eight days between shows and off on the last one you bombed, I mean, that fucking set would just be going in a loop in my head when I was at work. And I remember one time, oh God, I bombed so fucking bad was hosting a show, which is the worst, because if you if you're just doing a spot EUBAM and it's over, but if you're hosting, you got to keep going back up and bomb and they already have lost faith in you was like, oh fuck this guy again.


Right. It was just one of these shows where it just wasn't a good show. Nobody really got him. And I walked out of the park and I was trying to run because I didn't want to hear anybody talking about the show. And I got out to the parking lot of. Because I heard there was a couple and they were talking about the show and I knew I shouldn't listen and I just heard the woman go, is it usually like that?


And the guy's like now he's usually funny. They usually have good shows.


And he goes, and that redheaded kid sucked to have another show for like a week. And I'm at work. And I just had that playing on a loop man that read it. It gets sucked man that ready to get sucked. I was fucking up at work and I didn't tell anybody what I was doing stand up because I didn't want them. I didn't let anybody I know my closest friends. I didn't tell anybody that I was doing it. Doesn't that inspire you?


What, like two years? Because I didn't want them. I was so much pressure to just do it in front of people I didn't know. I couldn't imagine somebody I know in the fucking crowd. And one time somebody from work, I finally told them he came out to the show. Of course, they sat the fucking dude right in the front row and I fucking hate it. And the whole weekend I had to think about I'm going to see that guy on Monday and what's he going to say?


And when I saw him, I realized his weekend on my show.


That's all right. I'm boring. His his his weekend was worse than mine because he had to sit there going, what the fuck am I going to say? And he came walking. I said, hey, sorry about that way. They looked at me because. Yeah, I mean, he just didn't seem like you were into it. You didn't seem like you want to be up there.


I can walk. I mean, and it was weird for like three days we'd be talking about games and shit and you could see it in our eyes. We were both thinking about how I bombed it. Wasn't that inspire you to work harder and come back and crush to kind of end the endless loop?


No. Maybe you want to quit the job, so you have to keep fucking looking at the guy.


No, I knew enough at that point that it was just like, man, he just came on the wrong night because there was enough good shit happening to keep you coming back. Yeah. So thank God. Yeah.


We're just doing this whole interview. You don't want to share those feelings. You don't want to show the fuck. I feel like a bombed out. You control your you don't want to show anything.


Huh. What do you want me to start breaking down crying that I fuck.




Fuck yeah. You missed the high school over there. I just think we're on a different wavelength right now. We're still vibing. But you see, if I took those mushrooms right now, would I be like crying?


Possibly. You have been challenged to a fight. Tell me about that. I walked away, OK, I, I fought until junior high and then everybody hit puberty and I didn't. And then that's when I got funny because that's when, like, teeth started getting knocked out and people got all bloody and shit. And I was just like my thing at the bar fights.


If you're the guy that goes down to the ground when all of that shit was going down, I was just like, no, I avoided that shit. I had other people that I hung out with that did that shit. And I was you know, I could be honest with you. I was envious of it.


I was in between black and white girls.


There is no difference until you walk down the street.


Why that? Because the people are racist. If you walk down the street with a white girl, they don't even see you walk down the street with a black girl. People see white people act like they're cool with it. Black people a little more uninhibited.


I remember in New York, they would just be like they were literally just yelling at my my girl just going like, oh, come on, man.


Really just point at me like I wasn't even there. Other than that, when you're in the fucking house, it's the same fights you don't take anyway. It's a woman and you're a guy that really all add up. Yeah.


And yeah. And I really learned like what the bullshit of racism, what it is and how beautiful my kids are. My kids are fucking beautiful and, and like so I feel like I have the answer to all of this racist bullshit out there. And all you have to do is look at my kids and then look at the royal family who've all been fucking in the same pond of white people and how fucked up they all look. We're supposed to be all banging each other.


Yeah, everybody people are people. And we all God's children, we all need to be looked at with compassion. All right.


Well, I think you got a little mushroom tinge on that.


But, you know, mushrooms, I mean, the fact that you're looking at the royal family go, well, you know, people are people.


And yeah, sometimes you got to oppress another country.


So you get all the gold. That's what people do. What we do.


A small matter here. You think that you do the same shit as the royal family. I don't know what the fuck they do.


I just know that you seem like you know what they tone with.


That's part of my shit. I act like I know I'm talking about. Then there's one follow up question and it all falls to the ground. I don't know anything about was trying to make a joke.


And then you got all philosophical and I didn't know what to do with anything. Life is like that, even to the smallest family. Life is like the. All your family, everybody has the court, their friends, everybody to establish power and their friendship. That's just how the world functions, you know, is somewhat some kind of law, some kind of order. I mean, subconscious order, like right now, this subconscious.


Do you think a white woman would have made that redheaded prince leave the royal family? Excuse me? Do you think it's that ready to do with a white girl?


Is he still in the royal family? He would do whatever me believe that, right? Whatever his body told them, loved ones, he would have been in the situation. He is now with this black girl. This is not the first time the black blood has been in their family. You know, these guys have conquered the conquered the world. They have every blood in their in their family tree. You think you think this could be the first black bloodline?


They've been black queens and the royal family in England.


Yeah, I didn't know that.


You need to know that. I told you I didn't know anything about it. I was making a joke. Yeah.


And she also claims that the intensity of the press she hadn't anticipated that was a variable within it all, which I don't know how you would know going into the royal box with you.


I don't know shit about. OK, OK, just flying around.


OK, this became all of a sudden Meet the Press, the royal family.


I mean, what do you think about YouTube coming in and fighting? I think that's great for boxing. I think it brings a different and it brought in the rise of other boxing fans that would never be boxing fans before expands the reach.


But you have no problem with someone who has no background in boxing, fighting a professional.


Listen, he's been fighting. So he has the background of boxing. If he'd been doing it for one, he'd have the back of five month. He has the background of it. You know, he's this is what he wants to do. He has a fighters have had determination, willpower and I mean and grit. And that's what he wants. And I don't care who be rich or poor, that's what you need to succeed in this business. That's the that's the thing that he's had blonde hair, blonde, blonde hair, blue eyed white kid.


And we're going to kill them. And that's what he sells. He sells to be able to be some blonde haired, blue eyed motherfucker.


Even even white people didn't want to question it, look and say, well, fuck, isn't that something so special to have the people think that that fucking band is so special they have that there's so many people want to kick it that he he can fucking make a fortune out of it and he's smart. That's a gift. You know, what a fucking gift. The he's so lucky. Have they give the gift to someone with a kick from their faith?


How much when you would promote a fight like could you sell in the fight off. It's a business you want people to watch.


Absolutely. So with you, though, you had the the like every fight was just amazing.


So you had that.


But like when you were hyping a fight, like how much of that is real and how much of that is real to that after the fight, then it's then it's all like, oh Nick, did anybody ever say something about you before a fight that even though you're sitting there as a professional, go and get this guy selling this fight.


But he crossed the line and I can't let that go.


No, I was always crossing the line. I mean, one time that he put his hand on and then shake his hand. You know, I have that kind of guy. And I I was really dark, right. Because I was insecure. Oh, he didn't shake your hand after. No, I wouldn't shake his hand, fighters would go down and shake their hand, but like afterwards it was fine, afterwards was fine. But during that process of making the flight, do no no motion, no friendship.


Now, what about the press conference with Lennox Lewis over. That was heavy. I'm a heavy do sometimes are very intense and passionate, passionate.


What do you think? You never thought like as you're walking down to the ring, like, what the fuck out of. How did I end up doing this?


I believe that I'm walking away. I believe I'm going to do this. I'm the person I believe I believe the purpose of fighting with evil creator was because of me.


That's amazing, because I would be thinking, like, I don't want to do this.


No, it's like going to save for the biggest night for me, like 60000 something coming to see. Not that nothing is like that is what you guys do, because they do that a lot with comedians would be like, you know, before special. He trained like a fighter. It's like, no, he didn't. You didn't. It's like these guys can get serious.


You can get seriously fucking or you can die.


Like the worst is going to happen to me is I'll have flop sweat, dry mouth. And some will say that redheaded kid sucked. I mean, that was the worst that can happen to you. But when you're like walking into like a gladiator, into a ring, like I said, I must keep it a real way from the desire of somebody wanting to be something special, a comedian feeling the equivalent of being a cold. A real comedian. Now, I actually get what you're saying, you you relate everything with emotions.


Yeah, I don't know.


I still, you know, blows my mind when I watch, like, UFC and there'll be a guy on the ground and the guys, the other guys just dropping elbows like one elbow. I'm like, yeah, I'm tapping. This guy's just taken elbows and you see the guy look over at the clock, he's like, all right.


Thirty more seconds of this. And then I got to go sit on that fucking stool. They're going to take that cold thing or whatever. And then I have to continue doing this. The fact that they can a human being is tough enough to do that. Like whenever I watch those UFC or I watch one of my favorite fights, Charlie Murphy, like great. Charlie Murphy told me about this fight that Carlos Castillo fires or how many times Karalis went down.


He's spitting out the mouthpiece, trying to give himself some time. And I remember he went to the corner in his corner. Mango's, you better fucking get inside now. I don't know what that means. And then he went out and he fucking knocked the other guy out. Charlie told me, he said he woke up his whole family watching that they were all asleep. It fucking screamed. It was like. It was like a rock.


Charlie come from a fighting family. Yeah. Charlie was no joke with the truth. Yeah. Yeah. He's a fine family. Yeah. Yeah. He was the best. He's another, he's another one. You know, I went I got a pizza the other day and the woman behind the counter had a sweatshirt on it says assholes live forever. And I was just like, I hate to tell you this because you're young. That is the truest fucking thing I've read in a long time because I know so many great guys and they're just gone and fucking assholes.


Excuse me, people can't kill them.


Believe it or not, some people don't think they're assholes. And that's another life that takes on to itself.


I would argue that that actually makes that's what makes you an asshole, because if somebody is an asshole and they know they're an asshole, eventually the apologies is coming. But when they don't, not even aware that they were an asshole. Those are the people that I see that just seem to fucking you know, you could even with an 18 wheeler and there's somehow going to crawl out of it.


I had an airbag that I used to be that way. Well, about the people affect me as much as I used to, and now I realize that they do. The only you know, it's. Well, you did the work. Oh, absolutely. The mental work.


All right. Well, I get to work on that. I guess you loved that. But that's the only way you can forgive yourself. That's woo hoo. That's life lifting. You can forgive yourself.


Yeah. Surrender. Yeah. Stop beating yourself up. Hey, when can I do this podcast again? You can do seven minutes.


This is a 24 hour podcast, so if you like.


Should we wrap this up, Mike, if you want to give me the other way, I'm trying to think of a world where my like you to take the kids back is to be with the family.


And I play. You know what? I'm going to hang I'm going to do a podcast and I'm going to take some shrooms.


Oh, you really need shrooms. Then your wife left you you really need you know, she just went back east and that's an area she didn't leave.


She didn't leave me to go right now. I'm going back, Ethar. I want another one and then the one live another one. And I like New York City and I don't want to do that. Oh, you live out here permanently.


I think living is colder than New York right now. Yeah, we're still in Vegas at night here, too. We have this next gig that was I think will make you feel like you feel like you're really cool. You're talking kitchen and this is I'm sorry. You know, this is the only thing I got left. Now you're talking shit doing your next game. I'm telling people, listen, that the pressure is on.


I'm going to the Palm Beach Improv. And that's going to really. Yeah. Palm Beach Improv. I'm excited. Nice. I'm very excited. Yeah. I mean, it was interesting. You guys are talking about assholes and I played an asshole for years. And one of the best ways to play a guy that you're talking about is there are certain guys. The way to play them is thinking that no one is the devil in their own story. So you can't judge what a you know this from playing guys.


You can't judge you get more experience in acting. And I'm new to acting. So, yeah, I'm listening. This is riveting. Well, you don't you can't judge your characters. You don't have the same ideology as that character. You can't judge it. You embrace it. You give him as much integrity as you possibly can because no one is the devil on their own story.


And who's the hardest guy you ever had to play? Like you're looking at the script and you're like, how do I play this guy I recently was working on on this role, I.


It's going to play an Israeli dude who's a kind of a gangster, and I remember I went to the the dialect coach and I said, you know, I really need to work on this. And she said, well, why don't you audition by sending me, you know, you doing the Israeli accent. So I ended up doing it's a beautiful accent. It's an incredible accent. And that was, you know, you throw yourself into it and it's beautiful.


I got to learn how to do that because everybody gives me shit. Like when they watch the Star Wars thing, they'll be like, I never heard a Boston accent in outer space. And then I always want to say, well, what about English? Don't you think it's fucking weird that you're in a galaxy far, far away and everybody speaking English?


That wouldn't blow your mind if you went to another planet and someone just said, hey, Mike, what's up? Not make me understand.


Yeah, you understand what they're talking about. Yeah. Chewbacca speaking big foot in Han Solo, speaking English. They never switched languages and they totally understand each other.


They had to bust your balls. They felt like they had to.


My buddy said the thing he goes, oh, that's where that's where it lost you.


That's where the reality of it.


So yeah. But I can't thank those guys enough. It was Jon Favreau, his idea. He was just going out. He goes, I think I really I think it's going to work. And I was like, all right, OK, I'll do it. I remember the first day I got there, all these people I was working I was working with were in this crazy makeup, like looking like aliens and shit. And I just remember thinking, like, how am I going to get into the reality of this?


This is fucking nuts. But they were so good. After the first take, I was like, oh, my God, I'm getting killed in this like I got to. And then after that, you kind of forgot that they were wearing costumes and in between takes you talking about global warming and shit and they fucking put space stuff. You just forgot. It was truly one of the great experiences I've had in this business, getting to do something like that.


And, uh, and then the fact that, like, people watched it and really liked it, it was you have as much as last year was tough. It like people saying that they liked it was it was definitely a high point of my year acting was that you want to do some acting now? Yeah.


Like I want to do this is the weirdest thing. I want to learn to speak French and I want to be in a French gangster movie and you should do it. Well, yeah, I got to learn how to speak French first. But if you want to, you will. Mm hmm. I got the guy for you, Vincent Cassel. And you know, he's one of the probably, in my opinion, the best actor over in France plays a lot of gangsters brilliantly.


Well, I started watching you.


Whatever you want is right there. You got the connection, right? Yeah.


Do you guys get along? Is a good guy, right? Anything you want to you got to see a movie called Irreversible. Irreversible. Yeah. It's a heavy, heavy, heavy, heavy. I've been watching that show called My Agent. It's like a it's a French. Yeah. Thing. And it's but it's like it's you know, it's just around the office. So it's really like sort of common language. So what I have the subtitles in French and I just keep it in pause trying to figure out what they're saying.


I mean, the comedy doesn't work as it goes by too quick.


But my wife Haith, I love to read.


Yeah, there's people who won't do that. Like I just want to watch a movie. I don't want to sit here reading. My thing is I'm really bad at reading, so it always goes by as I learned how to read.


But with even subtitles, I get anxiety like when I would go to the movies and there was like subtitles, like it would take me back to being in high school and just flunking everything. And the shit would always go by too quick. And I'd have to ask my wife, what did they say?


Yeah, we got to shut up because my wife can read really fast.


But it's cool seeing that people in other cultures like that and being able to immerse yourself in that.


Yeah, I mean, watching the Criterion channel, it's fucking amazing. It's fucking amazing.


I think what's going to happen is we're going to continue talking. We're going to look up and everyone's going to be gone.


You forget that feeling that you have an audience already. Some people already went home.


All right. Well, this has been cool, man. This has been amazing to Cuban cigars. Oh, fucking. Yeah, man. I have a whole new perspective on mushrooms. Like, I mean, that's a good way.


I'm not being an asshole. I'm, like, not being as would. Thank you. That's OK.


All right. But you are truly welcome back anytime soon. Hey, when does this come out?


So my wife doesn't think I just went, oh no, we're not filming anything. This is not been documented. You didn't do a fucking podcast. This one hung out with your friends. This is a podcast, but there's nothing. We're just hanging out. These aren't even on. OK, I said no to mushroom's fifteen times. All right. I was worth documenting. I was working. It's got to go. I got to tell you, it's an honor to meet you.


Thank you so much for all the stuff that I've watched for decades, the stuff that you've done, I still watch all of your stuff, follow you on Instagram and all that you're thinking and watching you evolve and all.


It has been amazing. Jeremy, you are right there. Thank you, brother.


You see that? Yeah. I love you. I love you. I love you.


Thank you for having me on. I'm Gerry calling from the Jerry Callahan podcast, so here we are again, another silly conversation about a meaningless made for TV sports event during the time of covid. That's right. The NBA announced that the All-Star Game will be played on March 7th in Atlanta. The NBA Players Association and the league finalizing what a condensed All-Star weekend might look like and how to manage the quarantine and the testing protocols. Why is all this happening when the players and team executives are skeptical about how this is all going to work?


What do you think? TV contracts, TV ratings, sports or money? The All-Star Game numbers have continued to slip as fans see these events as a nice thing to have, just not necessarily a must have. Players can opt out. Many do, which is why the league's come up with all sorts of gimmicks each year to make these games more fun for the fans. I have news for you. Fans don't care about any of it. So do us all a favor.


NBA scrap the all star game and concentrate on getting through the season. That's what fans really care about now that the big game is behind us. The NBA and the drive to March Madness take center stage in the NBA. The Lakers box at 76 is look good early, but the smart money might just be on the New Jersey Nets. This college, Gonzaga, Baylor and Michigan seem to be the teams to beat. And let's not forget the NHL, the PGA and the UFC to all season long bet online that has all the NBA, college and other sports action odds and lines all for free.


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