All you want to do is sit in a cafe and quietly enjoy this podcast when you can, I have a tall Hemi Demi semi half caf goat McClarty. Oh, and can you serve in a macchiato class?

Oh, give me strength.

Cut the nonsense and keep it real. With Trebor, pick up a refreshing boost of Creber extra strong mints or a cherry trees of tree soft mints.

Hey, everybody, welcome to a new rerelease of one of our best episodes and one of our actually it was our first with the amazing Chris Pratt. We've got Marvel talk, we've got fatherhood talk. We got new baby talk, marriage talk. We've got Parks and Rec talk. We've got golf talk, we've got transforming a body from a tubby lard man, and I don't think he'll be mad. He was a tubby lard man at one point and now the man is an Adonis.

It's all there. Everything you want from one of my favorite people and one of the biggest movie stars around Mr. Chris Pratt. Enjoy. Bravo.

Oh, look at him. Look at that chiseled Adonis person. I just got a haircut. How did you get a haircut? I'm so fucking jealous, Captain. No way. She did a pretty good job. Did she laugh all the way through it the whole time, huh? Right. But I'm looking right at her.

Well, well, well, welcome to literally with me, Rob Lowe. This is my podcast and this is my first episode of my podcast.

And I got to say, this has been insanely fun talking to friends that I'm interested in, forensic people you're interested in. And this has just been an amazing, amazing new journey for me, this podcasting thing. And I've been recording a lot of them during this covid locked down somewhere remote, some in the studio. But the breadth of the people that have shown up to literally has just been amazing. And I cannot wait to begin this journey with you.

Finally, we're starting off with a bang. He's one of the biggest movie stars of the day. He's got every club in the bag, as they say in the golf world. He's can be dramatic and sweet and funny. He can do action. He can he's smart as shit. He's handsome. He's romantic. He's he is the new prototype of the leading man and one of my best pals. He does not have as good a golf game as he would like to think that he does.

But look, nobody's perfect, including the great Chris Pratt. Now, your wife has one of the most unmistakable laughs in history. Don't you think? Oh, yeah, the first time we started dating, the first two days, she was laughing so much like I was like, God, I'm really killing it. And then she was really laughing. I was like, oh, oh, no. Does she have an issue? Is is there and she's got a thing going on.

Is this this is why this is why she's single. She has like I thought she was like the Joker. You know, how he carries around that card. Like, I just laugh all the time. I can't help it. But it turns out she doesn't have that issue. She just thought I was funny and it was really nice.

Imagine if she she inherited that laughing thing. Like, that's that's the weird part of the Kennedy gene. That's the part that nobody talks about.

Like boys can't stop laughing all the lesser Kennedys suffer from. I got to tell you. I got to tell you. I'm it for me, it really works because I'm always trying to make people laugh and so. She likes to laugh, I make her laugh, it's a good fit, I don't you know that I don't make Cheryl, my wife laugh.

You know that you've you've been around us enough to know that Katherine's great audience I married somebody is a terrible, terrible audience.

Here she is right now. She's delivering me. Come on in here. We're just talking about your amazing laugh. Oh.

Oh, that was a sex. That was your public. Oh, very well.

Because I just get so much criticism for, you know, my the laughter that never stops. Your sons make fun of it. It's like the whole thing they do.

By the way, can you cut my hair because you did a killer job on him? Did you use shearers on the bottom of it to like you?

Shaver Lovebug knows how to do it. Wait, who taught you? Do you go Google something? What happened?

Your wife taught me many, many years ago on your head when we were in Milan how to cut hair. Yeah, she taught me well. She is not here to do anything for me now. Chris looks really good.

Yes, she killed it. She has hasn't offered to do anything for you. I doubt that.

Well there is that. I mean, she's always pretty good about that, although let's face it, I wouldn't have survived as long as I have.

That's what she takes. Very good care of you. She does well. Fire you. I love you. So I was laughing about the fact that you and Catherine were watching St. Elmo's Fire together the other night.

It was on. It was on. It was on. Well, we were watching it. My best friend's wedding. It's a good one on TV. Yep. I was like, oh, whoa, that's cool. Like, you know, young Julia Roberts and Cameron Diaz. And I think I always get them confused.

Dr. Morrone, Dermot Mulroney and I always get the two views. But yeah, we were watching that on TV and CNN was fired. Just came up next. I was like, no way. It's I don't to watch that. And I had actually never seen it. And I and I was looking at Rob. And you were how old were you? Were you twenty. Twenty. Dude, I could legally drink.

It was amazing because like, your character is like this drug addict, sex addict kind of guy and but you're so attractive and so enigmatic and so charismatic, like you're that saxophone scene, like you were just like every girl and that, you know, everyone was in love with the character. And you could see why you're just so charismatic. And there's like, no what you shouldn't be able to get away with the stuff of that character was doing and still be so beloved.

But you were and it's your charisma. I just was like it was it really was daunting because I've. No, I know, of course, your work from from your life and from I had just never seen it almost. I've seen the outsiders and I've seen, you know, the West Wing and of course, when we met on Parks and Rec. So I know your body of work, but seeing you at that young age, it was like it was just fascinating.

I was fascinated me. I don't think I fully realized because that was the generation that that that movie really was made up of the that generation. It defined that generation, their movies like that, that happen every generation. And it's like that was that brat pack. But of that whole group of actors at the top of their game, in that time, you were the one with the most charisma. And it was just I mean, everyone was great, obviously, but it just seemed to me that you stood head and shoulders.

I don't want to compare you to them, but you were just so you just really stood out to me and and to everyone in the world, obviously. So it's really cool to see that. And just to see how the world must have seen you back then, because I know you're such a different person now.

Do you think it was just because of the hair mousse and the haircut?

I think it had something, of course, had to do with your hair. Tell you he looks sexual. I looked I looked sexual. He looked. I looked sexual.

Yeah. You just looked like you wanted to have sex. But I did like, I looked at you then and I was like, oh, he is then what kind of like Harry Styles is today to this generation? Just like. Yeah. You know, physical attracted was just an attraction. There's a charisma and attraction there. It was it was youth. It was like the youth beautiful youth personified. It was really cool.

Joel Schumacher, the director, was it was very kind to me with the close ups.

I think I think I definitely got more close ups than anybody else in that movie, which always and well, you could really hold a close up from no matter what angle you were at.

That was in the era that this is you know, it's dated.

There was a saxophone player in a band like the eighties.

Every every song, every song from from I'd say from nineteen seventy two to nineteen eighty nine. Yeah.

Every song had to have a sex solo, every song and the score of so many movies, like if you look at Lethal Weapon, I wanted to watch it the other day. I was like, that's, I've been, I've been, you know, hitting that. It's been hitting me that some of my favorite movie. He's growing up such and that the only reason I like them is because I'm mean, I was an idiot when I was 10 and, you know, nothing holds up.

And I was like, Lethal Weapon holds up. It's got to and I put it on. I was like, oh, that's a lot of saxophone, really.

Watch it every day. And it's weird. Like, I kind of does it does it. Hold it, hold it. But it is also like, you know, stupid. It's a little bit dumb.

I, I've been in quarantine. I've been having the boys, particularly Jarno and who, as you know, as a writer, catch up on movies that they've never seen before.

And it's great. Interesting. Oh my God. Really interesting to see. Like what holds up to them and what doesn't.

Exactly. Because they're a great test audience because they don't have, like, the sentiment around it. What have you watched?

Well, it's but also he has that weird thing of being new in the business. He's aware of the movies that he's supposed to hold in huge esteem.

Like we all know those movies we've heard about forever that are the greatest movies ever. And the truth of it is maybe we've seen him and maybe we haven't. Right.

So the movies that you're supposed to say are great now, even if you haven't seen him? Yeah, I was a guy who loved Casablanca for years before I saw it. Yes. I was like, oh, Casablanca. I'm in favor of it and don't get me started on Gonca. I started. Say what? Citizen Kane. I was a big fan of Citizen Kane. And then I saw it. And guess what? I loved it. The same with Casablanca.

But but yeah, I know. I know that I do that all the time. I pretend I've seen something because you don't want to. And it's funny because you just hope a tiny little white lie can get let off the hook. Like how far how far will you go with it?

One high. Yes, one hundred percent. Frankly, kid, I don't give a damn that scene. Well, that wasn't because of that.

I had a neighbor once who you just you just say you just nod your head and kind of go yes or no as your answer and you can kind of get away with it. I learned that from my may he rest in peace, my sweet, sweet neighbor. Growing up, Rory was a member of the Special Olympics and and was a talker, a real talker, loved to communicate and talk, but also had it, you sometimes said with a speech impediment.

He had he had a little bit of difficulty hearing or understanding him. So sometimes you get caught up in that like saying yes and no just in case, because you didn't actually know what the question was, what you wanted to be polite and answer.

I'm going to use it because, you know, I'm deaf in one ear and half the time I can't hear what anyone saying. Is that true? Yeah, I'm deaf in one ear. Look at the way I see what I have my headphone on.

Oh, I thought you were just doing the good Slim Shady thing. No. Yeah.

Now. And so I a lot of times if somebody is on my deaf side at a restaurant or in a bar, I just kind of I usually nod. Yes. So I got to do work in that. The way you're doing your head right now is good. It's yes. Nodding Yes and no. At the same time, I need to practice it in the mirror now.

Yeah. Another thing you can say is, is is your answer is yes. No, because that can mean yes or it can be no. You know. Yeah, no, that's really good. Oh, yes, no, yes, no, because the answer could be the answer is yes. No, the answer is no or it could be yes, the answer is no. So if you say yes no to something, then then they just take they they read whatever the answer should be.

Yeah. No, no. And then. So could you reiterate it. Yeah. Yeah. No, no, no, no, no. Yeah. Now so yes.

So the kids were looking at movies and they didn't, they didn't like Paten. How about they didn't like network. Network didn't stand up for them. Really. Yeah. Network didn't stand up for them and the one and what they loved which gave me faith as they Johnno and had a a out of body experience watching the graduate out of body and and then Harold and Maude. I loved Harold and Maude.

What was your favorite movie and TV show growing up? Were you like a six million dollar man guy like me?

I wasn't a six million dollar man guy for TV. I mean, I kind of grew up for television. A lot of afterschool specials. Don't stop there. Have you seen my after school specials? I don't maybe which ones? Oh, it's been a while. How about school boy father?

I don't know if I did. It's been a while. All I remember is learning some good. It was back in the day when I was very young. Like I said, you know, lobar for criticism. I remember it was back when television really cared about instilling values in kids. And so after school special would be about your conscience or doing the right thing or making sure, you know, if a stranger talks to you, that you tell somebody these kind of things.

I remember like getting like I feel like a lot of my moral compass in life came from those types of my mind.

Don't become a schoolboy, father. Don't do like like a kid who's in school who becomes a father. Yes. Wow. How old how old? A fifth 15.

Are they going to say fifth grade? I was like, oh my God, it's so.

15. Yeah. Hey, listen, don't do that if you can if you can avoid not being able to be given up. Is that true? I could not care for it now. Now, Dana Plato from Diff'rent Strokes, is that was that who it was? Yeah, she was the the mother of the school boy father. It was called schoolboy father.

But that was the best because the titles were always exactly what the plot was.

They just put it right out there. Yeah. You know, one could be like, what's that about? No, no.

And there was way ahead of their time. It was like, you know, my mother's bulimia. Yeah. Like, oh, this is going to be a story about a girl whose mother has bulimia.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. They don't leave anything to question. My mom loves those. Still loves the. She'll call me and tell me the plot of one of those movies. Oh boy. As if it like legit happened to someone. Yeah. That's really close to her. She's like and you're not going to believe it. The guy next door was actually spying on her the whole time. I'm like, what. What you you can't even write this kind of fiction, you know?

Yeah, mom, that's. But she loved them. So those are those are those were my I like their specials, but, you know, they grew up in like that. That's strange time of TV where I don't know if the stuff was good or if it was just good because it was all that was available, which I feel like happens. I feel like that was the you know, you see it in these emerging markets. I saw it when I was in China, when we were doing Jurassic World Press in China.

They had just opened up the country to, you know, entertainment beyond just state sponsored television. So, like, they only had a handful of channels. It feels like what America must have been in the fifties or something like the fifties and sixties where you had, like news, you had NBC and ABC or something like that. You like two networks and a news channel. And it was like in China, it was the same thing. They had like a a government, a state sponsored weather news kind of channel.

And then there was one channel that had some kind of entertainment, but it was the only entertainment channel they had. And you look and it's like really low production quality because there's just not that much competition, you know, but people really like it. And I think I lived through that era. It was maybe in the nineties with shows like Full House and Family Matters and, you know, like like the one where the little girls, a robot with small wonder, that was amazing.

You know, these kind of shows where if you watch them now, you're like, this is it just we've come so far. You look back, you can say they're not good. They're not good. How could you talking about how could I have loved them so much? And it's because there just was a lot of competition, you know, but then a little small wonder but small. But then like. Yeah, like. Oh, good. Well, there's the one about a butler.

Mr. Belvedere. Mr. Brown. Mr. Bill.

Like, well, there's a Mr. Belvedere was that was like a Magnificent Ambersons compared to, you know, by the way, that's another movie.

People always talk about The Magnificent Ambersons. It's Orson Welles finest oeuvre.

That one I've never seen. I've never seen that one. People go on and on about that one. I use it only as a punch line for very obscure reference jokes.

No, the the small wonder God, I can't believe that you brought that up. That was amazing.

The guy who made a little girl robot and no one at the time ever questioned whether he was a pervert. Like if we made that now, you know, that would be the question. Like, why did he make a little girl robot? You could have like first of all, he fucking cracked the code on artificial intelligence like like like our A.I. Sentient being intelligence. And he and he wants to just make I mean, it's kind of cute. He makes himself a daughter, actually, a pretty good movie.

Now, I'm going to go out to Dakota Fanning's people and see if she's available.

Oh, see, now look at how quickly you've turned. You're like, wait a minute. This is what I. When you get a big production company like you have now, you're like just mining movies out of fucking everything. Stay tuned. Parks and Rec after the break. I'm very happy to announce that all of our golden tickets have been released. If you were one of the lucky people who found a golden ticket, well, good luck to you.

And be sure to listen to how it all goes down on a future episode.

Thank you all for playing. And thanks to State Farm for being a good neighbor and helping me realize my lifelong dream of becoming sort of a weird, badly aging redheaded Willy Wonka. You're a weird Willy Wonka. You're a wizard Wonka.

People thought the original Willy Wonka was weird enough yet. And I was like, nope, that guy could be even weirder.

And now I've done it with my golden ticket competition. Anyway, very happy they're all out there.

Good luck to you. OK, what's in the diary today, five teen calls and a video presentation, not with this cough when a cough gets in the way of your day.

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OK, can everyone mute their mikes? Fenland non drowsy, chesty coughs Always read the label. See Balin Daudzai. Like a good neighbor, state firms there, they've been there, in all seriousness, from day one of this show and I'm so grateful it makes me want to sing the song. I'm so happy with them. But I won't because I'm not that good of a singer, and I know I'd like you to listen to the rest of the podcast, and if I started singing the state from Jingle at this point, I know I don't know.

I know we love the jingle. It stood the test of time. It's like the Hey Jude of ad jingles. Let's face it, it is. But if anybody can ruin Hey Jude. It's me, we know that life doesn't happen the way we plan it, covid has taught us that if we didn't already know it and it's more important than ever to think about your financial future, your life insurance and State Farm is the king of the mountain when it comes to that.

I wish State Farm had career insurance or less career insurance. Here's what I want out of State Farm. I want bad choice insurance. So like when I go in and have an offer on a new TV show. And I turn it down and that show becomes Grey's Anatomy, can you imagine if you could ensure a bad decision? First of all, state run would be broke.

They'd be broke for everybody, but they're not going to go broke. They're the stalwarts and that's why they're going to be there for you when you need them. They are the best. So, again, plan your financial future. You could use a good neighbor. We all could. I love them as a good neighbor for the podcast. If you're looking for life insurance, State Farm is there to get a quote today. Go to life insurance, not State Farm dotcom, or visit your local state farm agent.

That's for, quote, life insurance, dot State Farm dot com, or visit your local state farm agent. When it really changed me, though, and this is probably around the time that my own comedic critical self emerged for me, when TV really changed, two things happened America's Funniest Videos and in Living Color both came on the scene around the same time. And I remember that was like I have I'm laughing my ass off every night that I watch this.

I have to see it, I, I tuned in and, you know, Funniest Home Videos was amazing. But then in Living Color was something completely different. It was like finally the comedy was matching this sign of the times like you had like this diverse cast. It was really funny, super cutting edge. And even even and at the time, everyone's like, can you believe how cutting edge this is? Wow. That to me is when things started to really pick up in the world of TV.

But as far as movies, I was the guy who just loved and like action movies. Like anything. Anything. No. Yeah, there you go. There are certain things that do hold up and you're like, yes, I'm glad that holds up, you know what I mean? Like Ghostbusters. Hold up. Goonies holds up. Yeah, Footloose holds up. Oh, dude, you know.

You know, I've told you about my audition for Footloose, right.

Did you audition for Footloose? Oh yeah. I got to hear this.

So there are a couple of scripts that I remember of that era where you read them. You were just like, oh, this movie's going to be hit. Yeah, this movie is a hit. I have to be in it. I'm going to do whatever it takes to be in it. Top Gun was one. Yeah, Footloose was the other. And the producers, Craig Zadan and Neil Meron really liked me and the casting was going to be coming up.

And so I started taking take all these dance auditions and not like really a dancer or anything, but, you know, so they did a dance audition on an acting audition, just a big dance audition at Paramount, I remember at a stage and all the actors auditioned together and we all had to learn to dance to the Styx song the best of times of all songs. How's that go?

Was that song the best of times that I don't remember anything other than that? Well, and it was probably just as bad as my version of it now was. And anyway, at the end of the dance audition, it ended with a a jump to your knees and a slide across the floor. And when I did it in the audition, I blew my knee out and they took me out in an ambulance. I left the Footloose audition on a stretcher.

Whoa.

I did know of course, I know this, but the best part is when I learned that Hollywood is just nothing, if not a bastion. Of truthfulness. Was when they said, don't worry, it's OK, we are we've decided we're not going to hire an actor anyway, we're just going to hire a professional dancer that I read that Kevin Bacon got it. And he was recuperating. That's amazing.

He says the dancing. First of all, if you're not a professional dancer or you're not a professional singer, trying to do either of those things as a professional actor is really embarrassing. You know, like as an actor, I can do anything. But if I have to sing or I have to dance, it's really embarrassing.

Do you sing? Great. You sing. What about you sing great. We all know that I don't sing. I don't think so. It's been it's like pulling teeth to get a good it's like I sing like a golf, which is if you give me enough tries I'll get it right. But if I have to do it live and go play scratch, I'm going to definitely when I it into the bushes it's going to be embarrassing. You know what I mean.

When you, when you sing mouse rat, when you're, when you're doing and mousetrap. I think every I've seen a mouse rat concert. I've been to a mouse rat concert at the rap as a person. It's true. And you crush that.

Oh that's nice. That's because it's. But maybe that particular voice I'm doing like a comedic, you know, parody of like Eddie Vedder and yes. Nereus Rocker, you know, I'm doing that sort of like 90s rock voice and so many regard. I trained to do that. So I'm just not like a trained singer. Maybe if I had, like, what's my rock, what's my voice? And also it's comedic. So so I'm comfortable in a comedic space.

But if I have like I remember one of my most embarrassing auditions was going to sing.

I fucking sang some stupid fucking song from, like, how it was like from the lamest lame is Aladdin or something.

Did you audition for Lamees, dude? No, no, no. Sean, Vanna, Sean, Chris Pratt.

You know, the I just it's not my forte but but certainly dancing as well, like, you know, because there are people who do this professionally. And when they when they do it, you just look bad trying your best to hack it out.

Would you have would you have been able to pull off the audition for Stars Born? Could you have sung that damn song?

Oh, man. Come on. What need to do? I'm going to do I could do that, I could sing country, I can sing country, I'm working on something. I'm going to work. I'm doing something. Garth Brooks. Wow. Yeah, it's kind of top secret, but I can say that much, I guess.

No, no, no. No one's no one listens to this podcast, I guess. And that's where I met Garth.

And we are trying to do something together. And I think in it I will sing some country which is pretty cool.

I would listen it if it's not mouse, it might as well be Garth Brooks. Yeah. How good is Garth Brooks. Garth Brooks about.

Oh good. I saw his one man show, his one man show in Vegas when he had a residency there. Unbelievable. The greatest he just because what do you guys want to hear. Sometimes he would play songs he didn't even know.

Wow. Yeah. But on top of that, if you watch that show, it's a very it's not just him going up there and just doing like calls out to the audience to play songs. It's a really well written, well paced, funny show that talks about the evolution of music in America as he's taught from a young kid who loved Waylon Jennings and Johnny Cash. And then growing up through the era of 60s and 70s, 80s and 90s, like if you watch it, you realize at the end, like Garth Brooks is a massive hit because it's truly.

It's truly the next evolutionary step in American music picking up after what had happened from the greats like the sixties, the seventies, the 80s into the early 90s, like the best you have to watch it. The best songwriting, not just the melody of the song, but also the lyrics of the song. Like, you know, he he does he goes into this bit in his show and you can watch it. It's so good. But he talks about how.

At first, you know, there was like an era where the melody was great, but the lyrics made no sense at all. And he said that he performs these songs, you know, and he's like, it's so funny. Like, the melody is great, but the words that they put to it just meaningless mumbo jumbo or they just go, la la la la la la la la la la is like, what do you what do you do.

Totally missed an opportunity to say something there instead of just saying la la la la. And then he and then he goes into how about when the lyrics were great but the music was terrible and he got to the point where he evolved into putting really great stories to songs that were also musically really impressive. And so I'm a big fan. He's he's an American musician and he's the best. I think he's the best.

I need to ask because people are going to be pissed if they listen to this and we don't talk about Parks and Rec. I need to know, like, first of all, how fun was doing. The doing our little reunion was fun right now.

Oh, man. It was really fun. It was fun to watch. It was fun to be a part of. You know, it was funny because we signed on, Mike sure reached out, said you guys want to do this Parks and Rec reunion, it took about 10 minutes before every single person on the thread confirmed. Yep. No one check that there are people there, like, yes, I'm in. Let's do it. OK, let's go.

Right 10 minutes later. And so I was like, that sounds great. Let's do it. And then they sent the script, which they had worked on, and I was like, oh my God, this is so much work. Like I think we all just signed up for this thing, kind of forgetting what it took to do an episode of that show. I know. But to do it in quarantine because we're so spoiled as actors, especially me on that show at the time I lived seven minutes from the studio.

I would drive to work and be about 10, 15 minutes late every single day, roll out, get it, and go through my hair and makeup in 45 seconds. You know, step on set. I haven't read the script. I don't know what the dialogue is. That's it was perfect for me in that regard because Andy was never like never carrying that much emotional through line. Wait, you know, it was just like it was like if we're a jazz band and he was like a weird instrument that would come in.

And as long as I kept timing, I could I could freestyle and do anything I wanted in, like, you know, I could just riff. And as long as I stayed in time, I'd say whatever I want. So I would, of course, look at the script a few minutes before and and then give them a version of that. But then they would spin into something else. It was a lot of improv for me to do that character.

And so when I was doing this, I forgot like. How much work it was, you know, because it's you can it's not like I had it's not like I could just show up on set and they'd tell me exactly where to go, where to do all this shit ourselves. It's like, oh, wow, I got to set up a camera and set up some lighting. And and I'm going to I'm going to memorize all these lines because I have to because I don't have I can't really play off anybody because there's nobody here.

It was it was really hard, but I got to say it was really worth it. And in it it looked great. It was really fun and funny and great to see everybody. And it was a good cause. So I felt really positive about it. I just love how people loved it so and that they loved the Five Thousand Candles in the Wind. That song just lives forever.

It really does. First time I saw how much people must have loved that song was watching Nick Offerman do his one of his One-Man shows. Yes. And at the end he was closing, playing 5000 candles in the wind. And it was just like, you take out your guitar and you and it's just opens with the you strum the guitar with no no lyrics and nothing. And then then and then and so you do that. And but before he was even singing a single lyric, everyone knew what the song was.

It was like so fresh in everyone's minds, I couldn't believe it. And so he would sing. Then everyone would sing along. Everyone knew it.

I was singing about my favorite Parks and Rec moment with you that you and I ever did. And I have two of them. One is a famous Internet gif, which is. I'm in the foreground doing something, and you're behind me doing the ape walk, that is that. Yeah, which is which is when they gave me the Tosches. I gave you the Tosches. Yeah. Which is, I think one of the first scenes you and I ever did together.

I think so, yeah, that's right. Sure, the toe shoes thing, I also remember remember Whole Foods. Yes, it's Whole Foods. Yeah.

Going to Whole Foods. We just ran amuck, ran amok, and just with a camera crew, just did whatever we wanted and my whole thing on Parks and Rec was just to cause destruction and and break shit that they didn't know they were going to have to pay for at the beginning of the day. But I loved just breaking stuff. And so I think I was breaking stuff at Whole Foods. I like walked down the aisle with the coffee and just opened the coffee thing because I knew we had a budget to pay for 70 pounds of coffee that would spill all over the place.

I just opened the thing and all the coffee came pouring out like that, was unscripted, did a lot of stuff with fruits and vegetables, and you pushed me around in a cart. I remember that.

I, you know, listen, I think the whole the whole going to when you were able to pull up the thing with your say and go down to Indianapolis to go into Indiana and shoot that bachelor episode where we went into Colts Stadium, that's Lucas Oil Stadium. That was that was just I'm covered in goosebumps right now. You can that's official. I'm getting it is like I was so cool.

We wanted to shoot there. I'm I'm friendly with the owner of the Colts, Jim Irsay, who's one of the nicest men. And I called Jim and asked him if we could come and shoot in in the stadium. And not only did he let us shoot in the stadium because obviously Andy was a huge Colts fan and wore. You always wore the receivers jersey, right? Reggie Wayne?

Yeah. Reggie Wayne's jersey when I got married. Yeah, the best. And so we got not only did we shoot there that we had Andrew Luck and Reggie Wayne in the scene and. Right, right. That's right. And I remember Andrew Luck. You had to go and catch a pass and you caught every single pass. Andrew Luck through you. He is insane.

They were like fifty five yard bombs too, like he was on blazers. He was throwing from fifty yards out to the end zone and and flicking it with his wrist.

He never even wound up think, yeah, I did. I caught everyone I can remember. You're kicking the field goals. Yeah.

It's the first time I ever tried to kick a field goal. I never was ever in a position to try to kick a field goal in football because I wasn't the kicker. And so, like, yeah, I remember kicking field goals. We got we were like a thirty five yard or something. It was awesome.

I was I was drenched in sweat. I was about forty pounds heavier then than I am right now and I was just drenched in sweat having so much fun. That was, that was, that was pretty remarkable.

Just like. Well and we were in doing that sequence. Morgan Sacket came up and said, I just need you and Pratt to really do this because you're the only two men on the show who who know how to even hold a football.

And you think of it, you didn't want to see Aziz Ansari throw a ball.

Adam Scott couldn't identify a football from a basketball and Nick couldn't control football. Could you and me. That surprised me. Just us.

I got I can't. And that's true. I don't remember that far.

But that's makes to think of you know, I remember when remember when oh, when we did that scene where I did slide across the hall across the countertop.

And then I threw the briefcase across the room and it smashed into the light socket or the light switch and literally broke the light switch off the wall and shut all the lights off in the whole building because it was a Burt Macklin senior back the moment.

Yeah, yeah. I just it wasn't scripted that I'd throw a briefcase. I don't even think I was supposed to grab a briefcase. I think I just literally saw somebody's briefcase and slid across the countertop and then improv that I had just stolen it. Then you improv that I need, I should probably put it back. And then I threw some stranger's briefcase across this office we were renting it, hit the light switch on the wall, smashed a hole in the wall, and then all the lights shut off in this.

And it's all starts with with an improv.

Yeah. You say I've stolen this and I go, you need to put it back.

I put that back. Yeah.

Oh, that was so fun. You also it's famous in within the family of Parks and Rec. We all know this story and it's been told a thousand times. But but I'm sure there are people who don't know it that. It's pretty much. Given that you have the single greatest ad lib in the history. Of Parks and Rec. That's right. Yeah, it says, yeah, it's true. So and I was in that scene. I remember it.

So it's it's a we'll go ahead, tell the story because it's so good.

Well, I remember just sitting there, like for some reason Andy was allowed to work at Jim's oh, is the flu season episode which is so good. You're so you have a I don't know, that's a pretty great improv that you have in that same.

If I have stopped pooping in that one stop pooping is I would honestly in all modesty it might be the second best.

Yeah. That was pretty damn good. And everyone is at stop puking. Everyone was in the office or everyone in the office got sick. So I was taking over for somebody sitting at Jim's desk or something. And so basically I'm just sitting in Jim's position talking and I wasn't even any of a line in the episode or in that in that scene. Sorry. And Adam is walking or, you know, Ben is walking Lesley out saying you probably have a fever, you have the flu, you need to go.

And the dean, I think, directed the episode was like, hey, Pratt, do you want to say anything? We might we might we might catch you or Tom the camera, but said we're kind of catching him in the background. I was like, yo, give me Mitch, put them like that where I might want to improvise a line or two. So they stuck a mic on the desk and then they were walking out in an improper line where I said I had the computer in front of me.

I said, Leslie, I typed your symptoms into the thing up here. And it says you could have network connectivity, failure or something like that, network connectivity problems, as you know. And Mike sure gets so mad about it because he's like writes jokes. And he said he's very he's very generous. And by the way, he writes amazing jokes all the time, but he's always been very effusive in and complimenting that joke.

He says it's the perfect joke because it's it's a hilarious it's it's it's a story point driven. It propels the story. And you're the only character who could have said it.

That's I mean, you think about that's why it's so great in theory. Anybody could have said stop pooping. And it would have been funny. Andy's the only person other than maybe Jerry who is an idiot. Who could say we have network connectivity, right? Right, and it fits into the idea that I'm a little fish out of the water in the office, that I'm trying really hard, but I obviously don't know what I'm doing with the computer.

Yeah, I know how. I know. I know that it's a good joke here. I'm patting myself on the back of the joke, but I know it's a good joke because every once in a while I'll repeat it to myself and laugh. So like a joke that makes you laugh every time you hear it is a good joke.

You know, when I need to stop pooping, I say to myself, stop pooping. And I laugh and then I continue to poop.

And we'll be right back after this. All you want to do is sit in a cafe and quietly enjoy this podcast when you can, I have a total hemi demi semi half caf goat milk latte. Oh, and can you serve it in a macchiato class?

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I don't think I've seen you with that actual haircut before. I think you need to keep it. I took it down low because I was doing Jurassic World and I had to have a certain hair length and then they sent me home. They're like, don't cut your hair. And now it's been so long. I looked like a like a Fraggle Rock character. And I don't think they're going to be opening up London long enough. I'll be able to grow back into it.

But I thought I would take it down. Might be the one of the last. I don't have short hair. So you've got also got I was dealing with Katherine, who kind of just went Buckwild with the razor. So I don't know what you did, though.

She went crazy. So you were how far done were you on Jurassic Park?

Were they. I mean, we only like two or three weeks in no way. Yeah, we got a lot left, 80 some days left, 80 days left. And then Guardians is next for you.

Well know next is terminal list I. Well, it's going to depend because I know that I have a slot for Guardians of the Galaxy with like that were you know, in that we've made a deal on that. But I also have closed a deal for this show. Terminal list. Is that the TV series? Yes.

Yeah, it's at Amazon. It's with Mirazi. Antoine Fuqua is directing. He and I are both executive producing. It's based on it's based on this book that dude, you have to read this book and you're who else would love this book is Matthew. Matthew would go crazy for this book. Anyone who's like a gear guy, it's written by a Navy SEAL about a former spec ops guy who, you know. Is is the lone survivor of a massive attack overseas and comes back with kind of failing memory and of what had happened and then realizes he's starting to get blamed for it, but then unearths darker forces that are at play.

And so it's this. It's this it's kind of a revenge psychological thriller. And it sounds amazing. It's so awesome in the way that it's written by this author, Jack Carr. It's it's really fast paced, but it's super authentic to the point of view of a Navy SEAL dealing with everything from like the war Congress all the way up to the secretary of defense, how they, you know, without giving away any tactics, because anything that a Navy SEAL would have to go through the DOD, they'd have to, like, sign off on it.

So there's some redactions in there, but it talks everything from like not just warfare, but also espionage and and, you know, using electronics to to find the enemy and using cell towers to ping people to track people like it's kind of got some spy stuff, some war stuff, but it's all authentic and it's based on the real experiences of this guy. And so he comes back and basically uses some of the tactics that had been used against him in his squadron against these dark forces.

So everything from like, you know, he becomes an insurgent in America trying to weed out some evil forces that are trying to take him down.

So, dude, is there a part for a Navy SEAL that plays the saxophone in it?

There is nothing down there is. Now, I don't know if we can afford you, but. But dude will do it if you if you play Billy, like Billy went on to play the sax in it and he tried to get it built my character and sort of tried to get into the Navy SEALs, but he was too pretty.

They're like, fuck out of here, get out of here. Too pretty in that. Fuck you. I quit anyways. You can't quit.

That's a line in the every movie in the 80s had that line.

I think I quit. But you can't fire me. I quit. Yeah, that one. There's a there's a good long list of lines that exists in every 80s movie. There's like there's like it's quiet. A little too quiet. Quiet. That's in everyone. There's like. Where you're going, you're going to have plenty of time to think about it. There's that like that's what you tell the guy before you put him in jail. Oh, there's this thing where you're in front of the computer and you go and you say.

We're in. Yes, you know, you like click the thing and we're in the break through the firewall we're in, there's so many of them, you know, a lot of people don't realize that you had to learn how to bat left handed for Moneyball.

I love that little factoid.

Yeah, that's true. Yeah. How about that? And I love the story and I'll tell it. So you don't think that no one will ever interpret it as you being in any way disrespectful to to Pitt, which you're not and no one should ever be because I love him, his genius.

But you have that beautiful swing that's in the trailer for Moneyball. It's in the coming attraction, that slowmo trailer where your character hits the big home run.

Yeah. And then when you go to the movie and you watch the movie like, oh, we're going to see that great shot of Kristen SlowMo and you step into it and they cut to Brad Pitt's big mug. Is that true? Yes. And you hear. Oh, that's right.

I always wonder, boy. Yeah. You don't actually see the home run.

Let me here's the thinking. Hmm. You're Brad Pitt. You're like, so this movie's about me. I'm the star. This is the big moment. I wonder who that if it should be on that guy who lost all the way from Parks and Rec or if it should be on my face, I think it should be on my face.

In all seriousness, I'm being funny. I don't mean that. But it was I love that shot.

It's so they did have the swing. You did.

You had the swing man. How hard was that to learn how to battle? I couldn't do that. I don't know. There's no way.

It was not easy. It was like. A wooden bats, I remember the first here's what happened. I went to the batting cages thinking because I had to do it like a I had to do like a tryout. I had to go to a physical baseball tryout before the acting before before the before I got movie like I needed to show them, you know, I think I may have. Yeah, I think I needed to prove to them that, like, I could physically be a baseball player, you know what I mean?

So. Right, I was doing that hitting the ball.

I went to the batting cages and I was like, I'm just going to bat right handed to try it out. The first swing I took it was with a wooden back because I don't have to use a wooden bat. I hit the ball in the bat, jammed my thumb so hard that, like, I thought I broke my thumb. The first swing at the batting, I was like, oh, my God, I had a giant purple bruise on my hand.

And so I was like and I had like two days before the tryout. So I just had to practice with this massive giant wealth on my thumb, like talk about an actor, like I have the bitchiest actor hands. If my dad were alive and he shook my hand right now, he would slap me across the face, probably with my own hand. There's so soft and supple. I haven't worked a day in my life, you know, like, there's so it's so gently soft.

And people say, oh, it's I'm like, oh my God, you have soft hands and my God, it's so embarrassing. But I do. I rubbed lotion on my face and pretty much all the physical labor that these hands will have for a whole week. And so naturally, I did my swing and my my bitch actor and popped. And so I had to do the whole tryout basically with a thumb that I felt like was going to fall off.

But I still swung through and I kept hitting the ball, kept hitting the ball, and they gave me the part. And so I did learn to hit left handed and down underneath the Oakland Coliseum. They have one of those pitching machines that throw the ball one hundred miles an hour, which is not like two wheels. The way that you typically think of pitching as these two wheels and the jugs, the jugs gun is that is the two the jugs.

I think this is like a metal arm.

Yeah. That they spring it back and then it lets go in the arm, throws the ball. I think that's the only way you can like throw it this fast. Or maybe that's just the one they had, but we could crank up to one hundred miles an hour. Oh and I got to tell you, I was able to hit one hundred mile an hour fastball with the left handed. Now I'm not I have no illusions that I'd be able to ever I'd get struck out 10 of the ten times if I faced a major league pitcher, no doubt, because they're not throwing repetitive strikes right down the middle of a hundred miles an hour or so.

Like you can time out. You start swinging before the ball, even before the ball even leaves the arm. You start your swing to try to hit a hundred mile an hour fastball and but but, you know, that would throw a change up in a curveball. And I'd be I'd be screwed. You throw a you'd miss for sure. I'd get struck out 10 times right handed or left handed. But when it came down to moviemaking, I could do it.

And it's great movie.

It's when my favorite movie is. And it's funny. I don't know if it's something about as I get older and I see more things. Like it sometimes. Sometimes I watch a great movie and I'll know instantly it's great. Oh my God.

And then there are times where I watch a movie and go, I love this movie so much, but not realize it's great and not realize that I'm watching a movie that from now on, if I ever come across it on TV, I'm we have to fucking watch the whole thing.

Right. And Moneyball is one of those movies for make sure it is good.

It is a good, good, good movie. Although there is one thing I would have told that daughter to fuck off the end. I would have been like, I'm like, you know what? I'd be like, hey, I could be the most highly paid GM, the Boston Red Sox in history. And I'm throwing it all away so you can play that damn ukulele for me again. Are you kidding me?

But that's just me because I'm a misanthrope and you like the money.

That movie would just be called money. Have you worked with anyone yet where you were like, oh, my God, I can't believe I'm working with. So and so, like, I'm I'm very jealous that you got to work with Denzel. I'm very, very jealous. Yeah. Yeah, because that's pretty that's pretty intense.

I mean, I can only I mean, I can just only imagine he's. He's the man I mean, he's he's the he's got to be our greatest actor alive, got to be right. I think he might be. I mean, I think he's the he I think he may be the greatest leading man. Right. You know what I mean? He's not like a character actor. I think, like, you know, Daniel Day Lewis is probably or Christian Bale to me might be the greatest, finest actors like where that instrument is.

The medium, the clay with which they work is the human spirit and the physical presence and the sound. And they can completely change exactly who they are. Denzel is probably the greatest leading man, though. I think he's got like a sense of pathos and dignity and yeah, the perfect amount of handsomeness and the great a great voice, but like, you know. He's never been a goofball, you know, he's never he's never done anything to take away from his leading man.

Image in the it's like it's like Redford famously would never Redford's never really played a bad guy until recently. He finally did on something. I don't know what it was about America, I think.

Yes, Captain America. Right. It's the first time he's ever played a bad guy. Yeah. But in his, you know, heyday, which is an extraordinary run and he's one of my favorite stars, leading men, actors for sure. I mean, to talk about a baseball movie, The Natural Sharf dude.

But you're right, he never you never saw him singing Take Me Out to the Ballgame out of tune, right or wrong lyrics like somebody has.

I'm not mentioning names, but it was me. You could have been Denzel, bro. You blew it. You did take me out to the ballgame. That could have been you in training day.

That's all that's kept me from two Oscars. That's it.

I mean, I'm a man who knows my limitations.

Had I not done that, had you not done that, do you play saxophone or was that all fake? No, I fake play it like in fake play the saxophone. You like the saxophone. I once was like.

So David Foster, who wrote saying Almost Fire, wrote the song, he does a lot of big charities in place and Elmo's Fire and he and I have a thing where he'll be like, Oh, Rob Lowe, are you here?

Hey, just you remember that Saxl? I sure do. David and I come up and they've pre-record the the the sax, so there's no reed in it. So, yeah, I couldn't make a noise with it if I wanted to.

And there's like a guy behind the curtain playing it and I did that once a as a joke and then thought it would be like the old thing of a you know, we're like the piano is playing and then you take a drink and realize it's a player piano.

Yeah, I thought I was going to do that thing, but I got up there and started blowing and everybody was going fucking ape and thought clearly thought it was real. And then my actors ego got involved and then I couldn't give up and I just doubled down on it.

And and then I looked out and there was President Clinton and and he was and he was going like, you know, he was losing his shit at that point.

Now, if you give it up then and now, if I give it up, I feel like.

Right. So I kind of finish and I scurry back and Shirlow angry with me. She's like, you're such a fucking asshole. She is. She's so pissed that I that I did it.

And I was like I felt like I pulled in Cuyo and Rashied, his dad, Quincy Jones, was right in front of you right there. He was right in front of me.

And he was going in and he was yelling, You blow Rob Lowe. He was yelling at me and wow. And I was like, Dude, the fucking bell of the sax is right in front of your face.

There's nothing there's nothing coming out of it. And so I was all flipped out about it and I thought, well, let bygones be bygones. Nobody can remember. And two weeks later, I got a handwritten note from President Clinton asking me to come to Washington to do it, saxophone duet with him because he really plays the saxophone.

He really plays it. And I'm like, oh, what are you really what do you do?

You go, hey, so by the way, I don't really know what to do.

So he said, You can't afford me, Mr. Clinton. I called David Foster. I said, David, we have a problem. President Clinton thinks I play a saxophone and wants me to do a duet. And he was like, yeah, I already solved that. So how you solve it? Because, well, I'm recording Barbra Streisand. And I told her the story and she was irate and she called President Clinton and said it was all bullshit.

So this is when I really knew I was in show business and I'd made it, I knew I'd made it. I was like, I'm going to shame spiral with the President Clinton, David Foster and Barbra Streisand. I've made a vow that that was the moment that you knew that moment. I that's so crazy, because my moment that I felt like, wow. This I might I might have made, it also involves Barbra Streisand. Come on, I swear to God I went to a party.

With my trainer, my trainer happened to do training for and security for Ron Meyer, the WHO, one of the great agents and and businessmen and ran Universal is forever.

Yes.

And so I went with Duffy, my trainer, to this party, and Ron Meyer stops. I didn't have an invite. I just went as basically his trainers plus one. I've been to that house. Those parties are hardcore, unbelievable party. And I got up there and there was like Jim Carrey, who was at this party. Jim Carrey told you in Living Color, Jim Carrey was my man. I love Jim Carrey so much. And I had to tell him in the moment what a great how much how he shaped my life.

And I chose my manager based on who his manager was and all that stuff. And he told me all that stuff. And he was like, yeah, that makes sense. And yet I had a great moment with him, a great conversation with him where he was like.

He's he said to me, I'm kind of getting off topic here, but I'll get back to what Barbara had said that made me feel like I made it.

But Jim Carrey is a bigger name right now, so just stay with Jim Carrey.

And so Jim said, like, he was like, you know, one thing that's that you'll see that strange is that you've become a wonder of the world. And he said, which means you can no longer visit the wonders of the world. He was like, I was in Machu Picchu. And I've never felt worse. Because I got there and everyone turned their cameras on me. And so I stood there in front of something that I just wanted to be and I just wanted to be in awe of this thing, and it was distracted by other people being in awe of me in the presence of this great thing.

And he said, like, he was like, your life is going to be forever changed in that way. Like you've become a wonder and you that takes you out of the running of it was something along those lines. And I'm paraphrasing. So if Carrey hears this one day, it's like I've never met Chris. You did meet me. But also it might have been he might have said it's slightly different it like that.

But Barbra Streisand came up to me and she's like you, you're the guy. And I was like, What? She goes, how does it feel? How does it feel to know you? You are. You're the guy. And I was like, wow. Oh, my God. Barbra Streisand said that I was the guy. And then like, I was watching Jim Carrey walk by and there were I mean, every person that walked by was super famous.

It was like, what you it was like one of the only times we were going to a party where like what you would kind of imagine if you dreamed that you woke up and you were at a Hollywood party. It was all I think like I feel like Mel Gibson was there and I feel like I can't even remember. I think like Oprah was there and and all of these super famous people were there.

And and Barbara Streisand was there and I came there is like the plus one. To the trainer and I and I, when I walked out of there, I was like, I actually I probably could have gotten invited to this party without having that, you know what I mean? That connection is the weirdest thing. It was like because I've never I never lived in Hollywood when I was coming up to where I ever walked. I've never walked to a club and let someone let me in because of who I am.

That's never happened to me. You know, like I just never by the time anyone know who I am, I kind of stopped going to clubs and stuff like that was the moment to me where, like, I walked to the front of the velvet rope and they let me in because of my face or whatever. It was pretty cool. Right. Right. Right here. When I tell that story about gym, people were like, wow, he said that.

But it's like I get it because, like, people like me have been coming up to Jim Carrey for decades, telling him that, like he does know. And also it doesn't mean anything like as much as you as much as you like. In that moment, I wanted him to be moved by how much he moved me. Right. But it was impossible because you could have heard it all before. They've heard it before. They know that before.

And it's not that it's it makes sense when you're on that. You're like, yeah, I get that. I get that. Yeah, that I had that I've had that effect on people. I've had thousands of people tell me that. And I like, you know, it'd be great acting on his behalf if he if he, for my sake, had said thank you so much. Oh my God, wow. That really means something to me.

But it certainly wouldn't have been true. And I'm glad you didn't like to placate me.

You know, it's just I know it's such an interesting thing because it's like you could go because I've had it where you talked to some some famous person, you know, and you tell them I loved you and says they go, oh, thank you.

And you get the sense that it's the first time they've ever heard it.

Right. And that is actually better than yeah, no, yeah, right, for sure. Thanks, man. Yeah, yeah. Right. That's more authentic.

I mean, what do you want what do you want from you want like another great performance then then you can get that. Maybe they'll say, oh can we.

Oh my gosh. Thank you so much.

I mean, I guess you could do that and probably the the nicest thing to do. But at the same time, it can be exhausting to always have to perform, you know, and sometimes maybe you don't want to. Yeah. What's the name of the podcast literally. Oh it's great. Right. That's perfect. Yeah, it's perfect. That's a great team. It's because it is literally a podcast at the end of the day.

Yeah. It's literally Rob Lowe's podcast. It's called Oh, I like that, that's a bumper.

This is literally Rob Lowe's podcast, literally, and this shit literally Rob Lowe's podcast. You have you have a career as a voiceover artist. Thank you. I hope so. I'd be nice and never have to go anywhere again. Listen, I love you. Let's figure out when we can escape.

I'd like that. Let's figure it out. All right. I love you. US go. See you later. Bye bye.

It was so fun. This podcast, things kind of fun. Kind of liking it. I hope you guys like it, I'm not kidding, there are very few things, you know, after 40 years that are new to me and this is new and it's really fun. And I'm having a blast and I love just having a chat like that. You know, just I was like two guys hanging out and and you guys get to invite it, get to be invited in to the to the circle of conversation.

And that's that's what this is going to be from here on out. And and we've got great people coming up. And that was a great start. Thank you to Pratt, Pratt, Pratt, Pratt, Needham, come back.

He's the best.

All right, folks, I will see you for the second second podcast next week. Very exciting. Don't forget to download literally with me. You have been listening to literally with Rob Lowe, produced and engineered by me, Devon Tory, Brian Executive, produced by Rob Lowe for low profile Adam Sachs and Jeff Ross at Team Coco and Colin Anderson and Chris Bannon at Stitcher. The supervising producer is Aaron Blair's talent producer, Jennifer Sampas. Please write and review the show on Apple podcast and remember to subscribe on Apple podcast, Stitcher or wherever you get your podcast.

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