There it is, a win for the ages. This is all American. A new series from Stitcher. You realize Tiger Woods doesn't know who he is best in the history of golf. No question in my mind. And this season we're asking, what if the story of Tiger Woods that the media has been telling? What if it's been completely wrong? Season one of all American premieres, August 20th. Subscribe or favorite.

Now, Mr. Low ready. Now, wait. You have a ukulele in your hand? Yes. Give me some of that.

New theme song to the podcast. Welcome to the podcast, Not Ready Stories. He's got stories, that's it.

Oh, yeah, Yum-Yum. Well, Rob mean Yum-Yum. Here we are. I'm so excited. Welcome to literally, I'm your humble host, Rob Lowe. I don't even know where to begin. Mike Myers. I love him. I have been friends with him since Coche 19. 1989, 1990, we made a movie called Wayne's World together, we made a movie called Austin Powers International Man of Mystery.

Together we've been through marriages, kids, successes, challenges, friendship, and he is going to come as a shock. This is the thing that people say. This is what I don't think people really realize about Mike Myers.

He's funny. He's really, really funny.

Oh, by the way, during this during this conversation, you're going to hear us say Yum-Yum like a lot.

It's an inside joke that Mike and I always do to crack each other up. So I'm apologizing in advance. But that's the price you pay for getting to really good old friends together. There's going to be a lot of inside stuff. It just it makes me laugh. So be on the lookout for that. I think it's from an an ad for Bailey's Irish cream that we used to laugh about. I don't know.

Anyway, so Yum-Yum. And here is Mr. Mike Myers.

First of all, when did you start playing the ukulele? Oh, if you're an English person, you're issued the ukulele. You're telling me that English people have ukuleles and yeah, one of the Hawaiians get them then from English people.

Was it. No, just George Harrison used to play ukulele with cheeky Bergland. Abigale and Westmount, I'll break into your cottage and I'll take a shit on you, Flo Cheeky.

That's an obscure Lennon and McCartney song.

I'm a cheeky Baglan, a big girl. And once more, I'll break into your cottage and pedal on your floor. That was the Liverpudlian accented version.

It's a guy named George Formby. There's an English comedian named George Formby who used to play the ukulele and sing cheeky songs. So I made up a George Formby esque song, as if that isn't the world's most narrow narrowcasting of of a of a topic. Well, listen, it's one of the things I love about you is your obsession, your obsessions, period. I mean, George Formby.

Ah, we started. We started. We started to start. You know, this is the new this is Mike. This is the new show business. There's no beginning. There's no end.

You're right. It never was. It always will be.

This this interview could go could literally just be launched the whole time. It's very sad.

But but no, we're not we're not doing what we're doing.

Dr. Evil. No. Do you remember the first time we met? I do. Was it Paris? No, I don't remember where was it? It was Lorne's office on the Saturday night, but it was your office and you had the poster of Mike Myers Halloween in the back.

Right. Right. And you we're talking about, you know what you were going to write for my episode. And you asked me, you said we're going to do a Wayne's World or a Sprocket's. Which one do you want to do?

That was like Wayne's World. Let's just. Phuket's right. Right.

And we did Sprocket's and I remember that hurting my feelings at the time. But anyway, go ahead. It didn't hurt my feelings, but it shows you what I know. Mike, I can always pick the hits.

Yeah, we just both end up talking like Lorne. I know. Mike, keep picking the heads.

Right. The first time you meet Rob, you think, oh, no. Second time, twelfth time for the for the uninitiated, when I started asking Mike what it's like to host Saturday Night Live, he he gave me Lauren's advice.

Which was what, Mike? I don't remember. What was it the first time you host? It's like you don't know what you're doing. The second time you host, you know, a little bit more, but you still don't know what you didn't know the first time. The third time you host. It's like being shot out of a cannon. The fourth time you host the cannon is pointed in a different direction, but you're still inside of it.

But it's flying in a totally area. But you know that.

Is there the hose? There isn't enough time because you're sedated. The six time you're hosting someone else is hosting in your skin suit.

The seventh time, that is seventh time you host. You're in a diving bell. The time it's by phone. The ninth time Tom Hanks is doing it. So you're just watching tenth time you host.

It was all a dream time you host. How many dinners have we had, Rob? How many dinners have we had? Honest to God, I'm not. I had dinner with you. I'm not even kidding you three thousand times. I think. I think three thousand times. And the last time we had dinner and it's been way too long. But you're you're right in the thick of family raising. I've been there. I know what that's like.

Yeah. Yeah. That's it's all it is. And it by the way, it's the best investment you'll ever make.

But yeah it's been, it's been so long. But you remember what happened the last time we had dinner. Who came up to the table. I do know.

Is this are you taking me up for an impression. No. Know what you're going to do the impression with it. Paul McCartney. Oh, no way.

OK, it was me, you, Inhorn and Dana and it was the The Wayne's World. Twenty fifth anniversary.

We all went to dinner after the big screening and Paul came up to the table and said the following, Oh, I can't do a Paul McCartney.

Oh oh oh. Wayne's World. That's a classic.

Very bad. Oh Wayne's World. Yeah. That's great. Oh did I tell you I, I sat next to Paul McCartney during a screening of Wayne's World to know I was so nervous. This is in London and he was really chatty in the mean. And I was so nervous because, you know, I'd only like seen it a couple of times in front of an audience, you know, and I just you just hope the movie has a good show because it's all different for different houses.

Yeah. He's like, well, that's great. Mike, did you write that? And I was like, yeah, this stuff. OK, because that's a funny bit.

Do you how do you write hard work? I do it a lot. Yeah. In my head I was thinking, why couldn't I sit next to the quiet one and to sit next to the cute one. Then he was just unbelievable that I was like, Myers, have you.

No, since it's Paul fucking McCartney and you're sitting next to him, this is what happens when you're so, so ensconced in your work.

You lose all sense of, you know, where I'm being short with Paul McCartney, like and doing that sort of like hand pointy. Look, the screens over there. Take it down. Take it down. Paul McCartney trying to watch the movie. I work into it.

Did you do you Shechem, do you ever get to watch a World Heritage site? You know, I played Colonel Sanders. Right. Have we talked about this? Yes, we haven't talked about it. But I did know you. You played Colonel Sanders, who, as you know, I am obsessed with. Oh, you. How many? How many? You know, he lived in Toronto. I don't know if you know that he lived in Toronto.

Colonel Sanders. Colonel Harland Sanders, the Kentucky colonel. Yes, the Kentucky colonel lived in Mississauga, Ontario, which is a suburb of Toronto. I was obsessed with Colonel Sanders. I thought he was a great character. And I thought that Americans had so much narrative power, the ability to create a story that if, you know, Rome ruled with the broadsword in Britain, with the three masted ship, America has ruled the world with the narrative how strong the American narrative is.

And you guys had so much. You American folks has so much story power that you even had.

A guy for chicken like the chicken guy was so complete and you could go as him for Halloween and I have and I had, so he became my obsession.

I have gone as Colonel Sanders for Halloween and. Then I saw that you were playing Colonel Sanders, and I was very, very envious and jealous and, you know, not only did I play Colonel Sanders, but I sent one of his sandwiches into space.

Did you yeah, the zinger that was, is that what you call having a dump?

I sent I sent a zinger into space, Babyface, sorry I was late. I was sending a zinger in this base, dropping the kids off at the pool.

If I said that to the ad agency, they would have been like, fuck, we've spent so much money on this campaign. And Rob Lowe told to Mike Myers and he thought it was taking a dump, got dumped. I was we actually we actually said is very sorry, yum brands. Yum, yum, yum, yum.

We sent a sandwich into space and that's when they had me at hello. I was like, I guess, you know, everybody who played Colonel Sanders, you know, Norm MacDonald had played em and and they somebody quit and they were like, you know, this is the good calls you get from your team. They're like agents and whatever. They're like, hey, listen, I know this is weird. Like, would you have any interest in in two days playing Colonel Sanders in a commercial?

It's a commercial in which they send a sandwich into space.

So I'm sorry, would you say send a sandwich in space? Oh, yes, absolutely.

I'll be there. Um, but you you haven't painted my portrait as Colonel Sanders Mike has painted.

How many Colonel Sanders portraits have you painted?

I think I'm in the twenties now. I've painted Colonel Sanders about twenty times. I will often buy paintings and colonel them and put a colonel in it. Like I got this painting of a landscape and I put a colonel walking away in the snow. I bought a painting of a beach and put him relaxing in a cabana. You know, I just thought it was just kind of how we're all just supposed to accept that there's a colonel in our lives.

And first of all, my dad's whole take on it was those Americans. My dad was from Liverpool. Like, they've even managed to militarise chicken, you know, Colonel Sanders. And I was just I've been obsessed with the colonel for a long time. I put him in. So I married an axe murderer as part of a secret organization. And, you know, just love the colonel. And you got the plan. I saw that. But you know what I saw, Rob?

You know, I watch I watch a lot of military History Channel and American news channel and the History Channel. And I'm watching, I think, something on the Pacific USA in the Pacific. And I believe I heard you saying it was the twenty fifth day in Corregidor. The men fought bravely, fighting off leeches. They fought for democracy and each other. And that was Rob Lowe. Good. Great. By the way, I would do those in a heartbeat.

In a fucking heart, dude, when you get a chance to say that kind of stuff again, I'm in.

Yeah. You like your eloquence. You like your. Which is why you were perfect for four West Wing. The we're not talking about a time. We're talking about a time in history like those. You're like, you know, saying you would have been great in Mad Men as well.

That kind of like they're not buying a sandwich, they're buying a memory because you got one of those you've got one of those faces that should be saying important things.

You know, I mean, I, I buy the way I am struck by how handsome you are.

And every time I see you, it's like with Vern, God bless him. God rest his soul. You're a little Verne Troyer who's mini me. I was like, oh my God, he's really small. And then you forget about it. And every time I see Rob Lowe, I go, he's like, so and handsome. I forget every time you just walked in before and I was like, Jesus, dude, that's a joke. You don't mean you're such like an American, you're like the brony.

Tellman dude, do you go there? I said it. Oh, my God.

It's eBay. You're right. It Inverne was the same. You'd be like, he's even shorter than I thought and I've seen him all day. Yeah, but then you forget it then he's just virt. I mean and you threw him around a lot. He wanted to be thrown is the truth of it. And he was a really great comedian, a great stunt person. And you know, my training in improv is to say yes. And you know, I don't know if he had improv training, but, my God, this whole thing was.

Yes. And he didn't want to. Ever be like, you know, Vern, it's OK, you don't have to do this, you don't have to do that. He was always like, no, I'm in I want to do it. But he just we just kept giving him more and more. And I miss him. He's a good dude. He was the best. Yeah. How did you find him? Jay Roach found him. It's one of the most amazing dial ups ever where you sort of put into a script and then there's a one on one twelfth replica of Dr.

Evil and just like, OK, I'm on it. And then goes, What about this guy? I'm like, holy God, he's perfect. And same with Scott Evil. You know, James, like, here's Seth Green. He's perfect. And he was and he is so one of those people like yourself who makes things better than written. Oh, you're very nice. Do you? I remember.

I remember because I play the golf hole every day, but not every day. When I play, I play the same course and I know exactly where on the course you and I were playing golf right where I was doing R.J. Wagner impersonation. And you called Robert on the phone and said, you have to hear this, and I did, and then I forgot about it. I forgot about it until I read the script.

And there in the script, you would secretly put in one number two. But you would see this number two. Yeah. As played by Robert. You put it in the script and use my memory. I do that. Yeah. Because, you know, if you build it, they will come, you know. That's right. What else is going on, Rob? What's going on with you? What's going on? What's wrong with you?

It's going to you. Me? Yeah, I'm running the show. I'm asking the questions. This is my podcast. Is it? I'm doing my podcast simultaneously to you doing your podcast.

By the way, you just did a Jedi mind trick on me. Yes, I did. And it worked. Yeah. Well, Mike, it's good to be here. Thanks for having me. This has been a resounding yes.

Who would who would win in a fight, Austin or Dr. Evil? This is the kind of hard hitting questions that my podcast is grounded in.

Are these viewer write ins? Yes. Viewer write ins like Willie Templeton from Thunder Bay, Ontario, writes, Who would win in a fight? Austin Powers or Wayne County?

It's it's very Larry King Live. Did you ever do Larry King Live? I did. Larry King Live. Did you? Yeah.

And it's like, hang on. Hackensack, New Jersey. Go ahead. You're on with Mike Myers. Roanoke, Virginia. Go ahead. A lot of people in Roanoke hit a lot of viewers in Roanoke. Yeah, Roanoke, Virginia. Go ahead. You're on the air. Thank you, Larry. I'm a long time fan. First time caller. What's your question or your question, please?

He had no patience, no patience. But also it was mildly insane at times. He said to me, Mike, you're from Toronto. You love hockey. When the Toronto Maple Leafs come out all dressed in green, you must get so excited. And I was like, well, Larry, they they wear blue now. They don't come on. Yeah, they do try to wear green. Are you thinking. And then I start to get generous because I'm like Canadian.

I go, oh, you're pleasing Toronto St. Pat's the Toronto Sampath. No, I'm not going to believe they were green. Green. That color leaves a leaf is green. Mike, Mike, a leaf is not blue. I know that. Who would make a blue leaf. OK, well I get excited when they come out, Larry, even though they're wearing blue. They're not. These are green. What are you going to tell me next Sunday.

Brown. It's orange. What's the worst interview you ever had? I had this one guy asked me who would win in a fight, Austin Powers or Dr. Evil, and I just lost it on them. And I should say the fuck you're like, this is the state of journalism today.

No, I said I thought about it and I went, yeah, Yum-Yum maneuver. I was just such a dick just now, but it was funny.

And we'll be right back after this. Where are you right now? You seem to be you seem to be in a top secret facility. I am. I'm hardened bunker. I'm in my I'm in my basement, which I also call the sit room. Right. And that's where situations happen, right? Well, we are getting older, dude, you know. Oh, I'm aware, ma'am. I'm very aware. I'm yeah, I'm I'm watching the greys come in.

You have a beautiful gray hair.

Me? Yeah. I'm fully gray now. Gray haired, beautiful, beautiful gray haired. Used to be salt and pepper and now it's just salt.

When did it start. When I was 19. Really. Yeah. I've been color treating my hair since the age of 19.

No way.

Way party on schwing touch my monkey. You're like butter. Yeah.

One million dollars party on swing. You just run through them and get out of my swamp.

Get out of my swamp, Rob. That's all I can say. There are so many good cultural catchphrases that you're responsible for that. And then we have our own together. We have our own private ones which I like.

We have yum yum yum yum yum yum yum.

I think we probably should expand, but you do a better job of you actually gave me gold gold cufflinks that say yum yum that I wear proudly.

Yes, probably from Baily's. Bailey's had a series of ads where it was yum yum yum yum yum yum yum. Do you have tasteful handsome man gray hair like you went to the handsome store and had them put it in hanging in there? It's Grace that stays. That's what I say I when did you make that?

When did you make the take the Jon Bon Jovi option, which is when you just go where you wake up one day and you go, that is great.

No, it's my covid hair, it's my quarantine hair. I'm in quarantine. So I just was like, I'll just buzz it off. I shaved. It felt like Dr. Evil Bald. No, I went I went Marine. I went like Parris Island.

Oh, I don't want Marine. Made me think of. It made me think of Full Metal Jacket, that's a that's a logic, and then that made me think of Kubrick, which made me think of directors, and then I thought of Tarantino. And then I thought, I better ask my Quentin Tarantino. That's how my mind works, just so you know.

Yeah, sure.

How how was it that you were great in that was what was it like being hopping into that movie in Inglourious Basterds?

I think, as you were describing, was like if somebody called me to play Colonel Sanders, I got a call. Quentin Tarantino wants to talk to you. I was like, OK, again, I thought it was my brother Paul picked it up was Quentin Tarantino. And he said he's doing a movie about World War Two. Would you want to play a British general? And I was like, yeah, of course I want to play a British general.

And we talked about World War Two movies. We're supposed to talk for forty five minutes.

We ended up talking for eight hours about come on various war movies because I, I love war movies. I wouldn't want to actually be in a war just like I don't think anybody wants to be in an actual horror film situation. But, you know, my both my parents were enrolled or two. My dad was in the Royal Engineers. My mom was in the Royal Air Force. And it shaped who they are and and the Nazis were just bad guys, just clearly Nazis, fascists, horrible, horrible people that are.

You know, just they're the bad guys and. So for me, all the World War Two movies are so, so clear, like of being on the right side and then fighting the good fight. So I've become a World War Two afficionado. And, you know, he blew my mind because he said what he's doing because he knew exactly what he was doing, which is so fascinating.

And I have such a respect for him and I just think he's a hero.

But he said, just like with spaghetti Westerns, he said, I'm making what's called a macaroni combat.

That's what the the the subgenre is, which is to say that it's a European knockoff of an American war movie, which is like, oh, oh, heavens.

And he said that the term macaroni combat is actually Japan Gaulish. It's because Japanese film critics had had coined that term of macaroni combat. And, you know, you talked about this kind of magical reality you wanted to create. And I was like, OK, that sounds good. I wonder how that translates to the page that I'm reading the script and I'm like, holy shit, they fucking kill Hitler. They kill Hitler. I couldn't believe it. I'm like, I am so in and on top of it, it is that thing that I love, that kind of British like, you know, well, here the enemy is there, you know, your job, you know, that whole thing.

And I was just like and I loved every second of it.

Shot in Nazi headquarters now really was all this. Yeah, it was all this. Albert Speer in I think it's Potsdam was in Berlin anyways in Germany and all everything in threes, the type of architecture that makes you feel that the state is more powerful than you all the invoke and like I think you're crazy, oversized doors that are intimidating. And it then became a Soviet army headquarters. And then the Americans, when the Berlin Wall fell, the Americans had it.

Now they rented out for movies. In my first day, I get there and I'm wearing my British army uniform. And I'm just thrilled, you know, I'm in this room filled with thousands and thousands of World War Two uniforms.

This is my dream come true. And he goes, you know, Quentin wants to see you. So I go over there and it's the scene where Hitler is getting his portrait done, sitting there and like this and the Quentin terms like and action. And then Hitler like, you know, like I have an expression in August that, you know, like the Jedi, you know, the I thing.

And I'm like, this is a fever dream. This is a fever dream, you know?

I mean, like the place where, like, I think Leni Riefenstahl had an office like this giant. Right. You know? No, no. That's where I picked up my uniform. And then I'm in Nazi headquarters and it's just like Gestapo headquarters or whatever. And there's a guy dressed as Hitler wearing a wrestling cape and a French guy painting him with like a maybe beret and a mustache. And it's an cut.

And then turns around, goes, what do you think? I go, what do you think?

What do I look like? This is this is every like Airfix one thirty second toy soldier, every, you know, Spitfire. I've made over seven hundred one thirty seconds, get one seventy second scale Spitfires in my life. Every story of my parents talking about the blitz in my dad, you know, being in the Black Forest and the second wave of Operation Market Garden, it was just a dream come true and. And he was great and there's no play back, which was weird really for me and, you know, I did it and that's great because it's all pieces.

So he knows exactly what he wants. And I said, can I try one more? And then people were like, this is like a needle scratch everybody one more. I said, yeah, I want to just like if I did that, take like imagine you're going around a mountain pass and we did that take at 60 miles an hour. I want to try one in 100 miles an hour just to see, you know, for shits and giggles to see if there's one that just has a little something extra in it.

And he goes, I never do that. I saw the no, no, no, it's OK. I don't care. It's fine. Thank you. It's all good. He goes, go ahead, try one. I said, it's all good. It's all good. No, I'll try one. And I'm like, no, I serve at the pleasure of the president. It's all good because I'm not trying to just go ahead. Go ahead.

So we try one and about ten seconds in because during my takes, he's looking at this little monitor, that handheld monitor, and I can't see anything except I can see his smile and his head shaking like, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, which of course.

Yeah. Just makes you you know, I felt like Peter Sellers must have felt like with Kubrick, who had put a furniture pad underneath the matchbox and just watch Peter Sellers do takes and just evidentally like just laughed out loud and retakes and stuff. But I felt like, oh my God, this Tarantino and I'm like in the middle of this British character. And I just was like, it's like almost every one of my dreams come true. I'm playing a Peter Sellars character and he's got that smile that makes you like, go through.

I could go through a wall of fire, but then I get this extra take and all of a sudden I get the no, I don't like it. It's just in my head. I want to I, I have displeased him. I have displeased him, you know.

I mean, you got to don't like it.

He's he he didn't like it. He said, you know, you had to take it back and I was like, OK, I'm really sorry because. No, no, no, there's no story because I love your character man. I want to make this fucking movie. I want to make this guy the general. Fennec was the name of the character. I want to make the fennec movie, man. I'm so into the FNAC movie. So and, um, no, no playback, no playback.

Because I mean, you know, for those of you who have never been on a Mike Myers set, you know, you live and die, you know, we'll have fun and we'll look at the playback and Mike be like, oh, yeah. Now, that's great. More than that. Not so much.

And then you learn and you you go, well, you're just a very different way.

You try and have every line covered and then you try and put a little crazy juice on stuff because you only get to make the movie once. And it's such a it's the most expensive entertainment device created by man. And it's a lot to ask people to sit in the dark and not talk about themselves. And now even more so, sit with strangers. And it's such an unbelievable privilege to be able to make stuff and especially stuff that you've written that you want to make sure that every minute of the movie.

Every molecule is as entertaining as it possibly can be for Tarantino. The movie is a dream that he's you know, if movies, if dreams are private, movies and movies are public dreams, he knows his dream. And kind of like a sculptor who sees the sculpture inside the rock, he just takes away the bits of rock that aren't the sculpture. And it's done. You I mean, it's such a full dream that he has. So for him, he he did that all in his head.

He saw what lines were covered and it was done. I don't ever see it that way. I need to see playback sometimes, you know. Is there any hope ever of doing Sprocket's movie? I don't know. I don't know.

It's such an odd time right now. You know, I I was born in 1960 through I grew up in the 70s. I thought the 70s was like, you know, with a gas shortage and Munich and punk rock and just the recession. And I thought, oh, it's never going to get weirder than the 70s. And it's such a weird time right now. It's it's hard to explain to, like, you know, people in their 20s how I've never seen anything like this before.

So there's a broader question of of what's to be with show business rather than anything, you know? I mean, how are they going to figure out, you know, social distancing and how are they going to figure out how to make filmed entertainment anymore? Inamine. I mean, I don't mean to be negative, I'm sure they will figure it out, but it's such a crazy time right now.

Also, don't you want to make comedies for people to laugh in Redmond? I do. I was raised that being an entertainer is a very noble profession. And you are in service. I am in the service industry. I would like to perform a service such as it is or isn't or can be or whatever. It's just such an odd cultural time and it's an odd. Political time, so all of it is just it's just odd. It's odd like, you know, Mr.

Eloquent, but, I mean, it's just an odd, odd time right now. So in a weird way, if I were to do something like I don't think I can, you can do anything crazier than what it is right now.

I mean, well, that's exactly what I was going to say, is the level of crazy and outrageousness in our everyday lives is plenty.

Yeah. There's this guy, Matt Lucas, who is in Little Britain. He had this thing called thank you, baked potato. I don't know if you send it to you. Yes, I don't know. But it's this song that he sort of put around because he has this character called Baked Potato, who I love it already, by the way, baked potato. I'm in. And it's but it's like a George Formby ask. Song, you know, it's that kind of British Music Hall silly song in there, I mean, that is just pure entertainment and silliness, which I think the ukulele gives you, you know, I mean, if George Harrison would always say, right, you cannot be sad after hearing a song on a ukulele inamine.

True. Very true. And. And he did this thing and it was like, here's a thing that's happening now and something something something inside, and then it's like and we need some advice from Mr. Potato. So it's like, wash your hands and keep your say. Thank you. Baked potato did did it. But to do a bit potato and it was so sweet. It's just a sweet song. It's just sweet entertainment that it sort of, you know, in our house now everything is thank you.

Baked potato. Like we can't we can't not say thank you baked potato every time you say thank you. But it just said to me that we're in such a cynical, dark time right now. That I think that we need almost like pennies from heaven type movies, Inamine. Yeah, for sure. Escapism. We need escapism right now. More than than I mean, it's and you got to see this thing. It's Matt Lucas. Thank you.

Baked potato. I can't even give it justice. It's just and I was just like, oh my God, the genius of just being so earnest and sweet about this thing that is going to be so crazily disruptive and it's just embraced the sweet right now. That's what it felt to me. It's just fantastic. Anyway, so that's that's kind of that's where my where my CZI is right now on all of this.

Yeah, I'm I'm same I'm very much about trying to remind everybody in myself of our commonality and how much we all have in common as opposed to where we disagree.

Yeah, me too. It doesn't seem American to me. I have to say, having British parents and having lived in Canada, one of the things that I always love about America is, is this sort of sense. Like if you make anything, this is the best place in the world because nobody in Canada who do you really much in Britain, less so in Canada now. But it's what do you think you are in America? It's very who do you want to be?

And it just this kind of cynicism just doesn't feel like it's in America's nature. I mean, America's natures. Let's go do it, man. Let's make it. That's what I love about, you know, I became a citizen, took the oath. Take it seriously. My kids are American. I mean, I love the United States. They're sort of out of character right now. It's very strange. Agreed. That's the America that we all know and love is Jimmy Stewart.

Right. And Frank Capra.

And I think it's there. I think it's there as much as it ever was. But, you know, there are elements that want us to believe it's not for the sake of ratings, for the sake of selling newspapers, for the sake of their own political agendas, for the sake of selling you something.

You know, I think I don't think anything's changed except how we perceive it and what we're sold.

Now, I can tell you that somebody of English heritage, you know, cynicism, you know, who do you think you are as opposed to who do you want to be, which is America's true nature. It's. The Cando thing is so infectious and so right on and so what we all those of us who are lucky enough to be allowed into this country. And I've lived in other countries, we admire that so much, and I know it's corny, but it's true being somebody who's made things his entire life.

I'm so grateful to the United States for just having the whole mindset of let's go make something. It's possible. You know, if you were to have a restaurant in New York, you know, in any other place in the world, they'd go, you know, the restaurant business is hard in New York. They go, really? What kind of food is it? I mean, I love that. And I think the entertainment this is what I'm saying about this Matsoukas thing.

It's really like. It's what Lauren used to talk about when he would watch Johnny Carson, no matter how shitty things were, when he would watch Johnny Carson. It was just this continuity. When I saw the Queen's Speech, you know, when I was a kid, it was like, oh, yeah, there's the queen, we have the queen, whatever. But when her speech hurt, her coronavirus speech moved me to tears, not just because it reminded me of my parents, but because of the dignity of the continuity.

The decency of it, Inamine. So now I don't paint the colonel anymore, I paint the queen, I painted like 30 portraits of the queen. Would you be eligible for the knighthood? Well, I have the order of Canada. I have the order of business. Unbelievable. Which I got on my birthday two birthdays ago and one of the medal.

And it's it's also you wear it on your lapels, if I'm correct. Yeah. I wore the medal on the Golden Globes and some people were like, he looks like he looks like Dracula because it's a big medal. But I'm like, I'm so proud of Canada and I'm so proud of getting that thing. I mean, you know, I grew up in government housing, Jack.

You know, it's kind of a huge deal, you know? Yeah. Hell, yeah.

And it was international. And I just thought, you know what? If they're going to bestow me with that honor, I'm going to wear it proudly. And, you know, I get to have. Bossy after my name, sorry, I have letters in my name. You know, new letters, so it's Mike Myers. Oh, see, it's huge. And you have a street named after you. I do. Is this true? Is it going to in Toronto?

It's it's Mike Myers Drive Drive.

And then there's a part of Kennedy Avenue in Scarbro called Mike Myers Way.

The easy way. We're going to do it right there. Mike Myers way. I'm Mike Myers.

Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum. We'll be right back after this. But did you realize that Paul McCartney came up at dinner and told us that Wayne's World was a classic? No, I think I wanted to say Snow Sgt. Peppers is a classic. Are you out of your mind?

No, it's all crazy, dude. It's unbelievable. I can't believe it. But now I have kids and I can't believe that, so I know you're right in the thick of it, man, it's it's it's the best. And you just isn't it funny how what it what it does to your ambition?

Well, it not. So it does. I mean, it's I'm also like grateful for everything that's happened as well. So that also I don't feel like I wasn't rewarded or appropriated for my efforts. And now it's just sort of like, OK, I have a choice of. You know, being super ambitious or hanging out with these kids, and this has been the great thing for me of of this whole quarantine is getting to know my kids in such a great way.

We're in a weird way. It is one big thank you, baked potato, you know.

Yeah, for sure. I when I it's the same when I when my boys were of that age, it's I find it to be the best age. But then every as a parent, everything you go through with your kids is, is new and different.

And I love where we are now. We're back at home together. Mike, Matthew and Johnny, they're grown man and have their own careers.

And, you know, it never it never ends. Do you think it's going to end and it doesn't? Right. It just it just becomes cooler. And it's and I'll tell you the other thing, Mike, is like there you're smart enough and, you know, understand where you your place in your own life and always have and such a great way that you're never going to have the regrets that some have where they just weren't or couldn't be there for their kids.

It's the best investment you can make in it and it completely pays off.

Well, this is I would have to say that's a big influence on my dad, which is wherever you go, there you are. You know, I mean. So when I was at 75, I didn't think about anything other than that's what I'm doing and Unimin and so when these three. Little kids, you know, that's where I'm at and I'm loving it, so I'm very grateful.

I don't know why this just popped into my head, but another memory of us. Was the very first audience screening, at least the first one I ever went to have of Wayne's World, and, you know, people forget, you know, it's such an iconic movie. People people forget that it was. There was not very guarantee that that movie was going to do well, nobody really knew what the fuck was going on and, you know, it was very much you and Lauren and Dana and I was along for the ride and happy to be there.

But we went we were paramount. Packed screening and Bohemian Rhapsody came on and the place as the podcast's, the title, it literally exploded. I've never been in an audience screening of anything ever and had seen a reaction like the audience did when Bohemian Rhapsody came on.

You remember that? I'll never forget it, because it's it's a mixture of disbelief and relief, because it's like no guarantees in anything in life.

I mean, well, in it's and you and I never talked about it. I only heard it after the fact that there was a lot of pressure to not use Bohemian Rhapsody. Yeah. Yeah. Which which is why I loved when you showed up in the movie Bohemian Rhapsody is the guy shitting on it made me it was so delicious.

I just can't believe I got that call to, you know. It was like, do you want to do that? I'm like, hell, yeah, of course I do. And they're like, well. I said, what's the character? And they're like, well, what do you want to do? I'm like, holy shit, I guess I'll tell you what I want to do. And then was fun because. I basically got to do the character I wanted to do and about a song I love about, you know, just all kinds of unbelievable magic.

It's crazy kismet. It's really crazy kismet. Because I can I can see the studio going, you know, what would have been the song of the day? You know, it was Guns N Roses and stuff.

And I love Guns N Roses. Don't get me wrong, I'm not anti Guns N Roses. It just didn't happen to be the song that was that me and my brothers played in Scarborough, Ontario, Inamine and I had a vision for it. And to Lawrence, to Lawrence credit, he went along with it. You know, Lauren went, no kid has a strong vision. We'll support it, you know?

Well, that's really the key to making anything is, you know, I talked to young filmmakers and young actors is you have to have a point of view.

You have to be willing to fight for it. And then, yeah, if you have an ally who can help you win those battles, you're so far ahead of the game. But I'm grateful to it. I'm grateful to Lauren. I can't believe no one believed in me as much as he did, you know? I mean, do we have a battle? Of course we had battles because, you know, he's super smart and super smart. But at the end of the day, he believed in me far more than he did, you know.

And I'm grateful for that. I always will be.

You know, the other side of that stuff that I always think about is when it's a. Some starts questioning your vision, and if they questioned it long enough and hard enough, and God forbid it's somebody you respect, right, and somebody who's smart, you go fuck.

Now, is this is this the hill I really want to die on? Yeah, maybe. And then you start second guessing yourself and then maybe you give up. Right. And maybe you've now convinced yourself, well, it really is a jump ball.

Right. And you give it to them. Here's the scenario that never happens. Hey, the movie didn't work. But you remember those jump balls you gave us. You know what? You were a mensch. So we're going to make another one. No, no.

That scenario never happens. That never happens. No, that's a great piece of advice to give somebody, by the way. Right. Because it's true. Yep.

And in success, all things are forgiven and in failure, all favors are forgotten.

I just I think that's a good one. Yeah, that is a good one. I can out of that, you know. And I love what NASA says about failure, they don't use the F word ever, they always say they call it early attempts at success, you know. Oh, really? Yeah, that's amazing. That's what we like about America.

Am I imagining this or that? When I did young number two in in the Austin movies that. When I was doing my Robert Wagner, it was my Robert Wagner was predicated on knowing the names of all the maitre d at the restaurant to hear this.

Oh, do you know Gigi at the Palm is fantastic?

No, but, you know, when people say, oh, you're going somewhere, I got the hookup, you know. And they never have the hookup. I mean, there's only two people who actually have the hookup, and that's Lauren and Robert Wagner. That's right. At the end of Austin Powers said, Mike, are you planning on going somewhere after all this?

I said, Yeah, I'm thinking of going to Venice. Oh, let me hook you up. I'm like, okay, you know, I kind of it's not going to look up. And sure enough, I got literally the best room at Oh, God, Chipewyan is because I'm going to hook you up and ship the championship. Riani the chip. Oh come on, you good.

But I'm not to hook you up with Luigi Loutre at the chip and I was like, nobody's going to really hook me up. So I get there and like a boat picks you up, takes you to the chip. Brione, it's so beautiful. You can't it's not real Venice. You mean you're like good workingmen's. It's how I felt when I came to Manhattan. Could workingmen's, you know, and I got taken in. I was met by Luigi and he said, right this way, Mr.

Maspero. And like there was like staff lined up who bowed to me, take it to this room. And I know how much I was paying a night. And I literally got the bottom floor of the tip. Riani That had a view of everything, anything for you. Mr. Maia's Robert Wagner called ahead. Mr. Wagner called in literally. No. Oh, I got like what would be like the cheapest room and I got the most expensive room.

And I was like, you know, that is the dining room is like really hard to get into.

And it's like there's Sting and there's, you know, all these different people, you know, no gomersall heater's over there and it's all this stuff. Best table in the house. And I was completely hooked up. How are things going with your chocolate consumption? Because, you know, there's nothing better than chocolate fueled Mike Myers.

Literally, there has no greater.

Nothing better than chocolate fuelled Mike Myers, it's my favorite Mike Myers of all the Mike Meyers's, of which there are many. Well, you're very kind. Thank you. The I had fish food before this interview. And a coffee. Yes, coffee.

So I was I had low energy. And then I had that I had some chocolate ice cream. And then I was bringing the getting ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. Suddenly you can remember proper nouns. I know it's not funny. That's the first thing that goes a proper. Yes, it's on the I think you'll find Mike.

The first thing that goes are proper nouns.

Then I would say IMDB credits just go as adverbs for example. I'm moving with speed. Can think of it quickly. Yes, quickly. I think that was I was always Loren's. Numbering the assessment, so the first thing when you do a lawn impression is no, it the second thing you do, we play the game, remember of did Lauren say it or could Lauren have said it?

Oh, apsa fucking it's the greatest game in the world. Yeah. I actually wanted Amy Poehler and I were going to do a Twitter account, a fake Lauren Twitter account.

Oh that's so good.

And she was she was just isn't it. She was too scared to do it. Oh. If I had done it, he knows we all should have done it. He knows we love them.

We talk because we imitated who in the world gets talked about more. No, Mike, I'm telling Lorne Michaels, I think he's talking about that much. I know. And end to be quoted like that. Mm hmm. We would come in when I was doing Parks and Rec. We would do. And what's great is I have this I've worked with all these generations of people who knew Lorne in different times in year one. One era of Saturday Night Live is totally another era.

And yet the one constant is Lawrence quotes. Yeah, and they're good. They wanted her to do the Golden Globes again with Tina and this is a great one. And she did nothing. They'd crushed it. Right. And they thought, well, is it being should I do it again? Whatever. And she did so I called Lauren and says, I don't think you should do it next year at all. I think you should do it next year and the year after that.

How am I going to miss you if you never go away?

It's a good one. That's when it has.

Mike, as you get older, you find yourself being drawn to wood.

Well, at the end of the day, it gets dark. I love that we got to spend time doing this, but we need we need more we need more of it. We need we need to get our kids together. I mean, yeah, give Kelly my love. I haven't seen her in forever. How she should. Good.

Fantastic. We're we're here in in quarantine.

You know, we wish this wasn't happening, but I feel very grateful that we can all hang out. And, you know, it's one of those things of bad news that this horrible thing is happening. Good news. In my case, that I'm grateful for is just having so much time with the kids, so that's been great. Yeah, I'm the same and they're good people.

They're the best people you'd ever want to know. That doesn't surprise me.

Of course, we wanted healthy kids. Everybody does. And we're very grateful that they're healthy and we wanted kids that are attentive. But I didn't ever dare wish for eccentric kids. And I have all three. They're smart, they're healthy and they're centric. I love that they came out who they are. It's pretty amazing. Silly. They're silly, too, which is good. Thank God.

Sounds like you have you all have already understood the great quote about parenting, which is parents will do anything, anything for their kids except let them be who they are.

Right. Right. What do I know about anything you don't know anything about parenting, it's just the constant like what do I do? What do I do? Look, at the end of the day, you still like Maya? I never said that, says Bernie.

This is our mutual manager, Bernie Bernie Brillstein, who is a legend legend.

When Bernie died, a type of show business died with him. Would you not agree?

It was it was the last vestige of the larger than life fun show business or frankly, like a Colonel Tom Parker.

Back to the colonel. Yeah, Bernie was Bernie was a five ticket ride. Mike, you called him up. What is that? You called him up one day asking some advice and maybe a little bit of vulnerability.

Yes, it was right after my dad died and I was talking to him and he came over to Saturday Night Live and I was sitting there and I was devastated after my dad and he went, Mike, you got a hit movie. Your dad's up there. He's seeing you know, he's seeing it. He's seeing all of it. He's happy for you. This is a good time, kid. It's a really good time. I said, thank you, Bernie.

That means a lot to me because. Because at the end of the day. You know, we're in the Mike Meyer business and it's like Smyers, it's actually Mires got my name wrong, but he never said that.

But I was amused beyond oh, I forgot about the the part where he forgot about that fucking asshole.

Keeps saying. And I said that. I never said that. How about I didn't. I didn't.

He did. He knows he did now. So somewhere up there. He knows. He does. He did. He did.

That's OK. It doesn't matter. It's just really funny, that's all.

Look, and at the end of the day, the notion that I would have a podcast with Mike Meyer on it, that I would be talking to somebody who's played the colonel, it just tells you that all you need is a Canadian dollar and a dream.

Mike, the first time you play the colonel, you just want to look like him. The second time you play the colonel, you want to be the voice down.

The third time you've eaten all of the food they've provided from the colonel.

The fourth time it's been the fifth time you're looking more than the fingers.

And then the seventh time, I think once you knew the 11 secret herbs and spices, a little bit of mystery is lost.

All right. That's right. I love you, man. All right. I love you, Rob. Talk to you soon, right? I'm sad now. I'm sad that I don't get to see my buddy as much as I love it. You know how you run into an old friend and you go, God them. That person really is great.

We got to spend more time together.

That's that's what I'm feeling right now, Mike. And I need to do the umpteenth iteration of Lauren's list. I'm sorry, by the way, for boring you all without I'm sure you're all like, we don't care. Stop talking. I know you guys know what Lorne Michaels big whoop de fucking do. Move on. Talk about something we care about. Forgive me. I'm sorry that we did that, but I hope you did enjoy it as much as I did.

And I hope you got to see a side of Mike that I know that very few people get to see and just how thoughtful he is and how his mind. How about how his mind works, though? His look, there are a lot of funny people. But of all of the funny people, nobody's mind works like Mike's does, and I think that really came through in our talks. I'm really glad. Anyway, thanks for listening. And next week we got another doozy, so don't forget to download that one.

See you on that podcast literally with Rob Lowe. You have been listening to literally with Rob Lowe, produced and engineered by me, Daventry Bryant, executive produced by Rob Lowe for low profile Adam Sachs and Jeff Ross at Team Coco and Collin Anderson and Chris Bannon at Stitcher, the supervising producer. As Aaron blared, talent producer Jennifer Sampas, please write and review the show on Apple podcast and remember to subscribe on Apple podcast, Stitcher or wherever you get your pockets.

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