Transcribe your podcast

Why hello. On today's episode, we have a little something special. Yeah.


We put together a list of things that we're pretty sure Lily is going to do on the podcast. With this bingo board, we'll be playing, but Lily doesn't know what's happening. If you'd like to play along, that's why I showed you this. But let's get into the podcast.


Don't forget to yell Lily when you get a Lily. Testing, one, two, three.


Testing, testing.


Testing, one, two, three.


Have you seen Mr. And Mrs. Smith?


I love that movie.


Did you watch the new show?


No, I heard it was good.


Do you like Donald Glover, Lily?


He's tight.


I love him. That's my celebrity crush. Oh my God, I literally am in love with him.


What don't you like about Donald Glover?


I like how that's what you got out of that. You dislike him. I don't dislike him. He's fine.


Okay, I actually think of him as he's superior. Same with Tyler, the creator. There's just some people that I'm like, Oh, wow, you're just better than everyone else. Yeah.


I guess my celebrity crush would be Michael Reeves.


Welcome to episode 2 of the Offline TV podcast.


Are we rolling?


Yeah, we're rolling. Today, I'm joined by my co-host, Jody.


Why hello, everyone? It's currently 9:30. I'm a little tired.


I'm a little sleepy. I just woke up from a 20-minute nap.


Good morning.Thank you.I wish I had one of those. I was trying to nap, but my cat just incessantly bothered me.


The third voice you're hearing is Lily Pichu, who's yarning.


Good morning. I'll wake up during the course of it. We just have to talk about interesting things.


But not Donald Glover.


He's fine. He's all right. I'm like, Is he on the nice list? If I were like, Siano, I'd put him on the nice list. You know what I mean?


He's on the on the nonny list.




I would also put Hitler on the nonny list. I would say he's number one, honestly.


Honestly, I think he's up there. But Donald Clover, nice. It doesn't feel good using those two in the same sentence.


In comparison, yeah.


I I don't feel good about this, but I couldn't think the first evil person I thought of was... Jesus Christ.


Was Jesus Christ?


No, no, no. It was... It was... Can we just move on from this? I love Donald Glover. He's fine.


Name five songs by Donald Glover, Now.


Shit. Sneakers. Right? No. Skechers. No, that's just Sneakers, Frank. Can we cut all this out? There's going to be Donald Glover fans out there who's going to flame me. I like him for his role as Troy in community. That's how I become a fan.


Yeah, you are a fan of him.


Yeah, he's awesome.


Why would you say he's I?


No, that's how I say people are good. They're I.


What would you say about me, Lily?


You're hot.


I'm not I.


You're I, too. But you're also hot.


I don't know if that puts me above or below.


It's all over the place, honestly. Don't ask me what Broden is. I don't want to answer. Where am I? Tall.


We're just descriptive attributes. We're just appearance-related.You're tall.


Jody's pot. Donald Glover's 'ight'. What's Michael? And Hitler's evil. Based, really. Yeah. Michael's Michael. He gets his own tear. It's like under Michael Reeve's. Yeah. What are you talking about?


So this is a new format for us. Yeah. For you, it'll probably feel the same.


Cool. What's the format?


The format? Well, I think you'll just We'll discover it as we go.


Okay. Okay? Yeah.


I've got some topics here.


Okay, you both have checklist boards. It's making me nervous.


Don't be nervous.


I feel like I'm a patient in a therapist's option, and my therapists are Prunin and Jody.


Fuck. How does that make you feel? Bad.


I'm never going to be cured. Sorry, do you mind?


You're comfortable now? Yeah.


The light's so bright. It's bright in my eye. This is what heaven looks like. You think you're going to heaven?


If it's real, then yeah, I'd say so. That's cool. How about you? No. I definitely think you are.


Really? I appreciate it. That's very nice. What about Broden?


I think if Broden was to enter the curly white gates, he would turn around and do something bad to be denied access.


You think so? You think at the gates, I'd be like, No, I'm good.


You would peek in. You'd be like, Oh, that ain't for me.


I'd be like, I just want to see if I would get in. I'm all right.


I think Brogan would flourish in hell. In a good way, though. In a positive way, Brogan would make friends with people in hell and probably be really charismatic, in my opinion. Yeah.


You'd sway the devil.




Happy Easter, everyone, by the way.


He is the devil.


You think I would take over?


No, you wouldn't take over.


Hey, I heard you were retiring. I'm here to step up.


If you need to relax your hand around, I'm here. I didn't like it up there.


What's the board for, guys? It's making me nervous.


You don't need to be nervous at all about it, I swear.


Don't worry about it. Anyway, to move things along. We were recently in the Philippines. You have been to the Philippines. Yes. I wanted to compare our experiences. First of all, how do you feel about the Philippines?


They are the most passionate fans I've ever met. Did you feel the passion? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.


I felt the passion.


It was insane. You think you feel loved by your friends, and then you go to the Philippines, and then you're like, Holy shit.


I literally was debating, going and just streaming on Filipino time because I was like, I think these are the people that are my diehard. Diehard fans. Yeah, these are the people that I'm doing it for.


A lot of gifts, too. You probably came home with a suitcase of gifts, right?


I think we had a total of four suitcases. That's crazy. That we actually have not gone through yet. We're all trying to go through it together, which I'm very excited for, actually, because everybody who came up to me was like, Oh, my God, I made you this. I crochet this. I'm like, That's my favorite thing to put on my show.


There were a lot of handmade stuff I got, I remember, which was really nice. Letters. Yeah. A lot of passion, a lot of love.


A lot of passion, love? Yeah. I was surprised. Well, I guess not surprised. We went for a DSG event. We had this big live event where there was a panel to... Was it 2,000 people?


Something like that. Wait, I think it was 1,800. Okay.


Big auditorium filled.


Wow. That's a poop ton of people. Holy poop. Yes. Holy poop.


And then afterwards, we did meet and greets for hours. Oh, yes. Where just everyone lined up and went through. And in those meet and greets, a lot of them would come up and be like, I love Templuve. This is my favorite song. And I'd be like, What? And For me, it was always interesting when they would say the first song that we released because typically, they'll say the popular one. But then every so often, they'll say, Oh, this one. I've been listening since whatever. I'm like, Real one. But it also got me thinking, I checked my Spotify analytics, and the fifth top country listening is the Philippines.


What's the number one? United States? United States, yeah. What's number two? Canada.


I think Canada. Number three. Uk.


Number four. Australia. Oh, interesting. Number five. Really?


He really... 8 plus on that quiz.


Yeah, he actually named all five. You nailed that. That was impressive. Do you know yours? United States, duh. Canada, duh. Philippines is their two top five, probably. I think Singapore might be one. I'm not sure.


Oh, Singapore. Lily's very popular in Singapore.


I need to look. I don't remember.


When she goes to Singapore, the whole island goes to the airport to greet her.


You know he's making this up, right?


I'm not. Scara has told me the story.


I've been to Singapore once in my life, many years ago. That was like...


They would be walking down the street and people would walk up and be like, Where are you going? And they'd be like, Oh, we're looking for food. Oh, there's a great spot there. Great spot there.


It's because we were streaming, and you can stream anyone in Singapore because the entire place is two hour drive max. Not even maybe. I don't know. Singapore is great, by the way. You should go.


I would love to go. That is actually on my two travel bucket list.


Yeah, Singapore is amazing.


I've heard amazing things about it.


Did you go? Did you swim in the pool? There's three skyscrapers with a cruise ship on top. What?


I know what you're talking about. Wait. Oh, I've seen that. Yeah. In a movie, right?


I just saw a photo.


I saw it in Crazy Richies. No, I didn't. I went to the flower garden, though.


The ones with the big-Yes.


The towers and stuff. That's a staple of Singapore. I went to a Hawk.


Night. They have crazy electrons.


Yes. That is crazy that that's real.


So this scary part is If you're up there and you get in the pool, it's those pools where there's just glass stopping the water from going out. So if one crack and everyone just spills out.


Yeah, but you can say that about everything, right? One earthquake. Like, Hey, can LA is just donezo, right? True. I think I walked by this, but I never went here. That looks so fun, though. Wow.


When did you go?


Years ago.


Wait, you went with OTV?


I went with Scara, Edison, Albert. Me? Was it me? Was it them?


I swear I remember seeing you guys post about going to Singapore, but I felt it was more.


It was long ago.


It was a long time ago.


It was just the four of you?


Yeah, it was just the four of us. It was pretty fun. Food was great. There's so many... They're called Hockers House. Is it? Is that what it's called? Could you look it up for me, please?


Like the street food stuff?


Yeah. Hocker centers? Yes. Hocker centers. And the images. Thank you.


Thank you so much. You know what? Now I have a really clear I have an understanding of what we were talking about. I needed that image.


Thank you. I went to Hocker centers, and they're all composed... They're made of little stalls that sell one type of dish that they've been making for many years. It's very delicious. Yes. Okay. Thank you, computer person.


His name is Jamie.


I'm sorry, Jamie.


Okay, I have a question for you. Do you think you could name every one of OTV staff?


Yeah. Wait, unless I don't know if it's changed since the last time it's been. Has it changed? Oh, no. Is this a true question? Do I have to do it now? Are you confident? No, I don't want to do it anymore. I'm self-conscious.


We did this in the Philippines, and Céline, of all people, got it 100% correct.


Amanda, Henry, Broden, right? You're Jamie now, right? James, All right. Jason, Max, Kimmy. Oh, my God, I'm forgetting. Two more. Lauren?


Well, technically-There's a big one you're forgetting.


I feel like it's somewhat... It's like a brain fart. I swear to God. Oh, no. They're going to watch this. Now, I'm overthinking it, dude. Yeah. Oh my God. I'm going to overthink. Who am I missing?


They're all off camera, and they just said they all watch this podcast.


Wait, who am I missing? Wait, don't tell me. I won't tell you. What does it start with? I won't tell you. Can you tell me what it starts with at least?


I can tell you that they can make you look really bad.


Oh, Dunois? Yeah. Oh my God. Jesus. I was thinking of IRL stuff. In that case, do we include all the editors? Who edit for us? Otv and Friends editors, too?


Yeah, just say you can't. Just say you can't.


I think you got- You did pretty well, though.




I was thinking of people I see in person. We don't see Dunois much. He's a hero behind the scenes. Sorry, Dunois. Can you not make me look? I'm so sorry. You heard all of us piss. He knows our pissing. He knows our secrets. He's heard our mic packs.


Did you see that he rated our streams?


Yes, that was so funny. Dunois rated our piss streams because when we have shoots, sometimes we don't take off our mic packs.Well, I don't.I don't.


I don't even care. I'm like, I'm going to pee, man.


But he made a tier list of... I don't get it. How good our streams sound.




Yeah. I think he went off length and volume.


I think power was also a part of it.


I didn't get rated very high, unfortunately.


I wonder why. Like, your piss is weak. I don't know. A little tinkle. I guess.


Next time, I'm just going to fake them out. I'm just going to pour a water bottle.




Get an A plus on that. I want to do that too.


I was like, Oh, yeah, there's a lot today.


Then just drop the bottle in there. So there's weird sounds happening.


Oh, yeah. I don't think it shit on the mic.


I'd be embarrassed. Even a fake shit, you couldn't do it? I don't know.


What would he think?


He'd read it. That's what he'd think.


I guess. Drop some tennis balls, I guess, right?


No, what we have to do is continuously fake shit, so the real one is like, Oh, he'll never know.


Oh, yeah. Like, take him up a little bit. Yeah.


True. Yeah.


I used to be so self-conscious about shitting. I used to put a layer of toilet paper on the toilet so it masks the sound of the poop hitting the water.


In general? Even when you were by yourself? In public. Oh, in public. Like a public stall.


Yeah. If a new people were there, toilet paper barrier and then...


Oh, like a silencer?


Yes, it's a silencer.


Yeah, I've done that before.


Some bathrooms in Japan, Korea that I've been to have music playing. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. They say no, right? And then sometimes when I have to pee, they have tinkling noises, too, with music. I'm like, Okay, I don't need to do anything.


Okay, wait. Big question for you. What's up? You are sitting in the stall. Yeah. You have the bathroom, but it's a public bathroom. Yeah. You're mid-shit.


Okay, so it's mid-coming out.


Yes. Someone opens the door. Okay.


Damn, I feel like I would prematurely cut it.


You'd pause.


Out of sheer reflex.


I have to think through it just close and cut it off.


Then you just wait. You wait it out.


What are you waiting out?


What is your waiting? See, what I used to do, too, is if someone else is in the public stall, they have to pee, too. They have to flush eventually, right? That flushing noise is pretty loud. So I time it with the flush. So when it hits the water flush, no one hears a thing.


But they know you're pooping. They don't know that she's in there.


They don't really know.


They definitely know.


No, it depends on the bath, because there's many stalls.


So we're under the assumption that you're coming in. They don't know you're in the stall. You're pretending you're not there. You're like, I don't want anyone to know I'm here, and I'm silently pooping. Yeah. I see. So as soon as they flush, you drop the Kerplunk.


From my understanding, she holds it. As soon as that door slams open, they walk in, sit down in a stall. She's holding it the whole time, waiting. And then, And then you have it just in the chamber waiting. You listen to them shit because they don't know you're in there.


Oh, they're shitting, too. Yes. In which case, we could shit in solidarity.


Okay, take it back. They're peeing.


Okay, fair.


You wait. You hear the tingle. You wait for the flush. They start reaching for it. You hear the metal latch start going. They flush, and then you hit fire.


Yeah, I could do that.


And you just try to rocket it out. Okay.


I don't really do this as much anymore. This is everything I used to do lately. I don't really give a shit, get it? Because I'm just going to shit. I'll try not to shit in public bathroom still most of the time because it's in a public bathroom. I'd rather shit in the safety of my... I think shitting is a very holy It's sacred. It's a sacred moment. I need to browse Reddit. I need to sit there. Sometimes I'm texting my friends. It's a time. It's a time. I read Am I the Asshole post? Relationship Advice, best of redditor updates, World News, competitive Valor. A lot of stuff. You could techinate. Memes, Insta reels. What are you doing? You are checking off things, and it's making me nervous. What is this?


Don't worry about it.


Let's just keep-I want to see it at the end of the podcast. Keep telling us about your shit. Okay. I actually just uncovered this memory I have of shitting in a public stall, right? I'm in middle school or elementary school. I don't know. I had to take a poop, right? I'm so sorry for the listeners out there. I don't know. We can move on from this after. But okay. I'm in the stall. I'm taking a poop, right? I still remember this mid-poop. There there's this little girl, my age, obviously, I'm also a little girl, up on the stall, she's peering over me on the stall, looking at me. I look up and I'm like, What the fuck? I look up. As soon as soon When it comes that we meet eye contact, she quickly comes down and scurries out of the bathroom. What? And this memory has always stuck with me. So maybe that's where this is all coming from.


Wait, that would also stick with me. I'd be so uncomfortable. I was really... I'm like, How long have you been watching me? Shit. How long have you been sitting? Who are you?


Why are you watching me? Who raised you? And you were both 8, 9, 10 years old. We're both really young.


You think she thinks about you?


I think about her. Thank you for giving me public stall shit trauma for the rest of my life.


That actually does remind me. There was one time I was in a stall, and I was in the bigger one, the Handicap Stall. And this might have been at an airport or something. But a dad comes in with his kid, and they're in the urinals, but the kid has a lot of energy. The kid starts poking up the doors and swinging them, and then comes up to my stall. He's going one by one, comes up to my skull, dips under and starts crawling in and looks up at me and waves.


I'm like,.


Then the dad is like, No, that's gross. We have to wash your hands now. It didn't spook me or anything, but it was more so like, wow, kids just don't know.


Kids are so weird, man.


Kids are just kids. Kids are so weird.


Do you guys do weird stuff like that as a kid?


Oh, man.


I definitely did weird stuff. I pooped in a sippy cup in forest.




Buried it. Back to poop, man. Fuck. That's what me either of my mind went when we were talking about it. What else have I done? Peed my pants. I was in eighth grade. I mean... I peed them on purpose.


Okay. On purpose? I would say our-Power move?


Eighth grade is not really... This is a long story that I regret bringing up.


Why'd you piss your pants, Jody?


Okay, so I used to hate peeing. That was a waste of time. I agree with you. Yeah, I just really was like, if I'm outside playing, hanging out. I just don't want to go home and pee.


I completely got it.


So I'm at a park, and I'm like, I got to pee. And I'm holding it until literally the last straw. And then all my friends go to the park with the swing and everything, and I'm just chilling I'm waiting back. At this point, I'm sitting on my heel. It's getting real bad. I can't move. And I'm like, Well, what do I do? I'm not going to make it. I've sat here for too long. I have to pee too bad. And I was like, I came up with a plan. So I let it rip. I peed all over myself. I just peed. I just literally sat there and I peed. I run home with soaking jeans. By the way, I'm probably 11, 12.


eighth grade is 13.


That's 14. Maybe 13. Definitely not 14. I was always the youngest of my grade, so I'm definitely 13. I was 13, too. Okay, we'll do 12 or 13. Then I run home and I peel my jeans off and I put them in the wash. But luckily, I had a pair of the exact same jeans, and they were a unique pair of jeans, so you would notice if I changed. So thankfully, I had another pair. So I put it on, came back, no one knew the better. But then for some reason, I just had a pile of pea there. And I remember we ended up going near that area, and I dared my brother. I was like, Hey, I dare you to step in that. And he's like, Okay. I'm thinking it was probably water. And then he stepped in it and I went, Hmm, nice. And I never told him.


And he never washed his foot.


Hey, man, if you're listening, which you're probably not, really sorry about that.


Your brother stepped in your piss. Yeah, he did.


Nice. My My brother-in-law used to have wars, though. I don't know.


Is he younger or older?


He's older than me.


Older. By how many years?


He is turning 30 this year.


So five or four?


Four to four.


Four to five. Interesting.


He used to steal my shoes and hide them. So I would steal his Xbox controllers and hide them.


This seems like normal sibling interactions.


Did you do this with your brother?


No. I made him do stuff. I bossed him around because I was the older sibling.


He does stuff for you now, right?


Yeah. We work together now. It's nice. There came a point in his life when, I think it was after he turned, I want to say, 18, 19, 20-ish, where I realized he was a sentient human being. There was that turning point where I realized I can have full conversation with you and you have thoughts and feelings.


I know what you mean, though.


I know I know what you mean. Before that, he was like my baby brother. It's hard to not think about because I'm older than him. But after a certain point, I'm like, Wow, you can talk good. You talk good. You're conversational because I appreciated it a lot more when we got older. Yeah, but before that, he wasn't even human to me. He was like a fetus. I'm just joking. I'm not joking.


What's your favorite thing about him?


He's very responsible. I like working with him because he does a lot of the numbers stuff. He's very organized. He's very responsible. We're very opposite. I like that. Yeah. Good egg. Good job, Daniel. Probably not going to listen to this. Good day. Shouts out, Daniel. Good for Daniel. Good, Daniel.


Your childhood story reminded me of a memory I had from being in grade school. When you guys were in your classes, did you ever organize as a class? Class. Did you ever rebel or do something together?


Throw a coupe? No.


I have a story of this, and also Julian, who some of you know, has a story of this. I'll steal his story first. At his school, they had a school lunch where Jamba Juice would come, I think on Tuesdays.Oh my God, sick.Jamba Juice is sick. A truck would come and give Jamba Juice to the kids for recess.What? But one day, the Jamba Juice truck was late. When When he finally got there, delivered the Jamba Juices and needed to leave, all of the kids ran out and stood in front of the truck and were like, No, no. You were late.


No, no.


And wouldn't let him leave.


That's so fun. That's okay.


Just a moment that unifies all of it. There's no more hierarchy. There's no more social. Everyone is together. I had one where we were horrible to substitute Oh, no. Honestly, not that bad. We weren't pranking them by destroying stuff or whatever. But we all somehow had a chain where we'd be like, Okay, at exactly 12:03 PM, you drop your pencil on the right side and pick it up. He'd be writing on the board, lecturing, and we're all looking at the clock. It's one of those with the second hand. Then the second it hits 12:03, and then we all lean together and then come back up as if nothing happened. That one, he stopped and was like, That was weird. But we had one of those at least every hour. I actually don't remember how these dispersed among. It was like a, Hey, 3:00 PM. We all have to go to the bathroom. 3:00 PM. Then 3:00 PM would come up. All the hands shoot up. Yes. Can I go to the bathroom? Sure. Sure. Let me guess. Can I go to the bathroom? No, guys, you can't. That one threw him because he was like, What do I do there?


Everyone is just there waiting for him. Anyway, it gets to the end of the day. He packs up and leaves, probably thought it was the most bizarre experience. Our principal comes in and goes, I just heard about what you guys did. You are the most disrespectful class we I have ever had in the history of this school.




To this day, you can see that was a formative memory for me.


He must have felt, You guys must have felt you guys were so cool.


He probably just went home to his wife and was like, Dude, I hate this job. He just thinks they're funny.


I wonder if he even came up with his wife. Did he have a wife? Oh, man. What if he just lived alone and he was like, I have no one to complain about this, too.


Maybe he wrote about it on Reddit.


I feel like if I was a sub and this happened, again, none of it was evil or malicious.


It's just kids being mischievous.


I think I would laugh about it, but I definitely would tell the principal and be like, Hey, that's a kid, sir. Yeah. Yeah.


It's not harmless. At least it was harmless. You know? Right? It was harmless. Yeah, it was harmless.


Did I miss something?




The checklist makes me feel like What are you guys doing? What is this? What are you doing? It's something. I know it's something, and I'll find out. I will find out.


Yeah, I think maybe someday you will. But until that time comes, I'm curious, Lily.


Yes, Bird?


Have you been working on any new tracks?


Yeah. I asked you all to dance, remember? Yeah. Thank you for that. I'm gathering my dances.


I've now been in nine of those videos. How many dances do you need?


You're in so many. I I have to pick and choose.


Yeah. I mean, at this point now, you can probably just pick the best ones.


I will. Yeah, honestly, I feel like my interest level in doing things, I have a certain amount that I can share, right? If it's too much music, right? I don't do anything else. But if it's too much tech in, I don't do anything else. What are you doing? Why are you crossing? What is this? It's driving me insane. What is this clipboard? It's not like a gimmick?


Wait, for the listeners at home, why were we dancing for you? What was this for?


Oh, right. Okay, so for my music video, I asked a bunch of my friends to dance, and it's just going to be little cameos. Why are they... They both have clipboards. You have to understand, I'm in the middle of them, left, right, and they both have clipboards. Sometimes when I do something or say something, they'll mark something down on it. It's itching my brain. It's scratching it. It's like a tickle. I need to know what it is, and I'll find Give me 5, 10 minutes. I'll find out what this is. Anyway, I was asking people to cameo for the music video, and then a bunch of people sent dances, and it's cute. Anyway, what music? Yes, that's my answer.


Why this concept of just your friend's dancing?


It's one of the things I thought… It's like, Oh, dance without a care in the world thing because you don't understand people.


Okay. It relates to the video. It's not like because it's cheap or anything.


Yeah, it's not just like a dance. You're intimidating. You're both intimidating.


We're hot, tall, and intimidating.




Thank you. Those are nice words to I'm going to describe you. I'd be flattered if someone called me hot, tall, and intimidating. Unfortunately, none of them, really. Yeah.


No. Yeah. That's not in your character sheet?


No, it's not. When God made me a little D&D The character sheet art, he didn't put those in.


What is in your-Shy, quirky, artistic.


Is that it? Smart. What else do I have to say? Funny?


I would put that in your D&D set.


Sleepy. Why did she do that? I made a noise and she put something on her clip. Why would she do that? Are you doing a Bingo sheet? What is this? Are they checking stuff? Why are they doing this? This is psychological. Okay. A lot of this... I don't know if this is going to be edited out, but some of this podcast, they're both quiet it with clipboards, and they're staring at me. You know what? You got to include whoever. I don't know if he said it. We have to include some of these. It's making me... I'm scared. They're still doing it. They're just staring with clipboards.


I like just staring into the camera now to give them a sense of what I'm doing to Lily.


It's just constantly. It's peppered throughout the entire thing. I don't get it.


When we were in the Philippines, we were... Did you see the new personality quiz thing that went around?


It was dark hole or black hole. I can't remember the others.


Did you do it? Yes. Fuck, I don't remember what I got. I was a cosmic hand.


That's cool. What did you get?


Let me go look. Let me go find out. What did you get? Let me go look.


Let me go find out.


You were in a rocket ship, right?


No, I was either... I was something that was a dark black circle. But what that was, I don't remember.


Were you a black hole?


I either was a black hole or I was... I am indeed a black hole.


Let's guess what she is. I can't find it.


I can't find it. Deleted the screenshot. What was I?


What would Lily be?


How does she describe herself? Shy, artistic, funny- Smart. And then smart.


Okay, now you sound narcissistic. I thought, too. An egotistical toast Got, Dark Energy, John Got, Rocket, Sydney, Cosmic Hand, Jody, Black Hole, Sean, Satellite, Julia, Rocket, Broden, Cosmic Hand, Peter, Rocket, Scara, Meteorite, Tenzin, Galaxy, Céline, Light cone.


Anything else ring a bell? I think it was Gravity.


No, was it Gravity? I wish I knew. I'm sorry.


Delated this screenshot. This one didn't stick with you?


No, it was cute. I was just cleaning I got my screenshot area, and I accidentally deleted it. I want to make my own, though. They're based off of Myers-Briggs. There's 16 results I saw. It's a Bingo sheet, isn't it? Because I mentioned Myers-Briggs. Lily talks about personality types. That's one of your things, right?


Lily. I got it.


Fucking you. It's fucking Bingo Sheet.


Can I see that, please? I was one-off.


I was pretty... Yeah.


Personality types quiz, music, ask about Bingo card. I'm hungry, tired, or cold. Tecan, we hope to cut that. Is any of them useful? Michael Reeve's Daniel being helpful. Anime, Painting, tries to take Bingo card. Admiration for Teddy. Yeah, you didn't do that one. Distain for different... I was being respectful. Feeling old. I hate you. Wow. Wowza. Can I see yours? Yeah. Is it the same thing?


They're the same, but they're shuffled.Oh.


You were close.Wow, you were so close.Super close.




Yeah. It almost It feels like I feel relief now that it's done.Thank you.


Me too. Me too. I'm so glad it's over with. Now we can actually like, Tina, start.


Would you say that this feels like you?


Can I see again? Sorry. Anime. I don't really watch that much anime. I do say, I hate you a lot. I don't mean it, though. Tries to take Bingo card. Tekia, feeling the understand for Da Vinci. Yeah, pretty accurate. Yeah? Pretty. Who made this? Broden? Yeah, it's accurate. Whatever.


Yeah, I guess I know you, huh? Whatever, man. You didn't mention your dogs, though. I'm surprised about that. Yeah.


No. No mention of dogs.


Not once.




I wasn't sure. You said artistic, but not paintings. I didn't feel right crossing it off.


I said I was artistic, though. You did? Yeah, that count it. That's funny, guys. Good one, guys. Now we can really talk without these walls and barriers and clipboards preventing us. Don't do that.


This is actually a great segue. When we were in the Philippines, we were talking about people's catchphrases. And this felt like me just trying to... Trying to find out my catchphrases. Yeah, your catchphrases.


Honestly, I'm hungry. I'm cold.


But yours were so easy to write down. I'm just an easy character. Your catchphrases areSo're.


Just consistent in the best Yeah, I need to change it up a little bit. I think I'm going to change it up from now on.


I remember you saying that the last time when you were like, I'm going to say beans.


Yeah, I've definitely heard you say that. I did. There was a beans face. I think I'm going to change it up from now on.


But you always go back to your signature moves.


It's because it's not... It's like, that's how I feel. I am hungry, cold, or tired, 90% of my life.


I just think about our camping shoots. Anytime the camera's on I'm cold.


Guys, my lips were blue in that video. I saw myself and I'm like, I must have been really cold because my lips were not my color. It was insane. I just learned I don't do well with cold, and I think I will not be in that situation in the future because I think it's uncomfortable for me.


I will just simply not be cold anymore. I don't think I'm just going to put myself in the cold. I don't claim that energy.


I'm not cold anymore. Growing up in New Jersey, you didn't get accustomed to the cold?


I guess not. I also hate the hot heat, I don't like the sun either.


So there's no winning.


She just likes snow. No, I like a nice-Mild weather.70-degree weather.Temperate. You're temperate. Yes, very normal weather. But I'd rather it be cold than hot. Because you can always bundle up, but you can't peel your skin off.


What else you got?


Nothing. That's it.


Well, anyway, catchphrases. Do you think you could say mine or Jody's? Do you think we have any? Or anyone in the house? I'll open up to anyone in the house.


I think of Scara's. That's so cool. He says so a lot.


We found a bunch for Sydney. Sydney was easy to lock down.


What's Sydney's most common phrase?


She's like, Guys, I got to go to bed. I still hear it. I got to go to bed.


I can hear that.


Then when you tell her, No, you don't. One more game, she'll say, Then you take care of those guys.


Are you going to watch the dogs? Are you going to sleep with the dogs? You take the dogs then.


I can hear it. It's like clockwork. That's funny. What's your phrase?


I don't think we really landed on any. I think toasts. We found some. Toast was when he says, What? Or something.


He does do that. We're like, Huh? He does it. It wasn't me. He does it. Me?


He does do that. John's is, Dude, I can't. Yep. Rapper's scream noise, Scream's help.


Yep. John yelling.


Yep. Sydney's is also followed by, I'm going to talk out loud for a second. It's fine. I'm just going to do it. It's fine. I'm going to be fine. I'm just going to do it.


Yeah, she talks herself up.


I can hear them saying this while you're saying it. It's funny.


Her and Sean both say, I'm going to go take a nap, quite often. Sean is also, What? I never said that. Even though he 100% just said that.


He got to say that.


Oh, my God. He says, I'm going sickle mode right now. Yes. Broda and I have always replying, thanks to any compliment not directed at him. I don't know an uwu voice.


Could you... Could you demonstrate? I don't know. I didn't like that.


Apparently, mine are, I don't know, man. And sorry, I didn't hear you. I was disassociating. Which I'm not sure about the last one, but Sean swore by it. But again, that man lies. And, I don't know, man. I think I could say... If I said, I don't know, man.


Oh, yeah. Jody, you definitely do like a, I don't know, man. I don't know.


I don't know, man. I don't know.


I can hear that, too.


Sean also said that I had a catch face, which is Catch your face. That's a good one. You create these awkward poses.


It's not me. It's not me. Aren't you guys the host?


We were only supposed to have one awkward silence per episode on cue, but you're making it about seven.


We planned for one, but you're adding more.


This is wild. They're making me feel like the bad person here. Guys, you guys are the hosts. You have to keep the conversation moving. Then Everyone can edit out all these awkward pauses anyway.


What's funny is that we'll say something and then you'll respond, but then rather than really take it, you'll be like, Hey, yeah.


Well, I'm agreeing with you. I thought you were going to continue, but you don't. See, just now, I put my input and then you both go silent and then look at me.


She gave us half a second to respond.


Yeah. Mm-hmm.


The editor is going to take some of these out, but leave some of these in.


I know. I already know what's going to... I already see the finished video in my head.


Yeah. We're going to make sure that you look horrible.


That's okay. It's okay. Everyone should know that I'm an awkward bitch. It's about time, honestly. I feel like that was a good input just now. I feel like that was a good comment. And then no one's saying, Editors, you have to put that in. This has been the case for most of it.


I almost want us to put a little sound effect or noise. Like a ding.


Like a nice count. I want to count now.


I think they should put laughter sound effects to make it seem funnier than it actually is. Like friends.


But those are real audience.


Oh, really? Yeah.


That was when there was actually a filmed before a live studio audience.


Friends then. What's the other A show that's carried by the audience.


Well, Nickelodeon and Disney channel shows typically have the canned laughter is what it's called. You can tell because if you listen, they use the exact same one every time. There's a guy in the back, so this is laughing like, Ha, ha, ha, ha.


But then one guy goes like, And once you know that it's there, you will hear it every time.


You ruined it. I don't watch those shows anymore anyway, so thank God. Glad I didn't know that years ago.


I I got it in middle school and then could never unhear it.


Wow. I just laughed along with them. I'm like, Oh, it's funny. They're laughing, so it must be funny.


What was your favorite show growing up?




Nickelodeon, Disney.


I used to watch a lot of them. Hannah Montana, before way back for Amanda's show.


Oh, my goodness, Meander show.


So many like Zoe 101. There's so many.


I loved all of them. Hannah Montana.


Hannah Montana was fun. Zoe 101. Ike Carly.


Wait, Hannah Montana transitions. That's the sound effect I want in our awkward pauses. Do you know the...


Or whatever.




I don't remember.


I'm waiting. I'm giving them pause so they can put it there. You interrupted the pause. I'm sorry. Go.


I'm sorry.


It's ruined now. I'm sorry. It's gone. The moment's gone.


I apologize.


It's so quiet. We heard someone cough over there. How do you feel right now?


Guys, what do you want me to do?


I actually do want you to do something. What do you want me to do? Could you sing us a jingle? A jingle? Yeah. You know, this is a new podcast.


We'd love to hear. Jody and Brodon in the morning.


It's like 10:00 PM at night. Yeah.


Jody and Brodon in the evening.


Can you do it at night instead? I think I like the word night a little bit better.


Jody and Broden at night.


Oh, I liked that. I really liked that.


Can you do that two more times? We have a vocal stack.


Jody and Broden at night.


Then I wanted to go like, Night to be repeated multiple times with multiple layers of voices. Yeah.




But harmonize it.


Night, night, night, night, night, night, night.


I think that is actually perfect. Yeah.


This is going to be a great... This is going to be a banger. I totally didn't copy it from Troy and Abit in the morning. I miss community.


I like that we went full circle to the beginning.


Yeah. Back to Donald Glover.


That's what we call a callback. Wow.


So who's your celebrity crush?


Michael Reeve.


Who's your other celebrity crush?


Yeah, wait. Do you guys have hall passes?




Is that like an innuendo to...


It's like the exception. I see.




Do you? Who's your celebrity crush?


I actually, after our conversation with Toast, I feel like I shouldn't talk about movies anymore.


Why? Wait, I feel like you could...


It's celebrity crush is a good thing, no? I basically have a crush with Or a current celebrity crush, everyone in Dune. I mean that literally. Everyone in Dune.


Dune One was boring.


I actually really liked it.


Yeah, I love the world building.


Oh, I did not like it. Wow.


Maybe because I watched it. I didn't watch it when it first came out. I I watched it when the second... I knew the second one was coming, so maybe that was a little bit more digestible. Interesting. But I personally loved it.


Couldn't get into it. But I heard Dune 2 is fantastic. Everyone's talking about it.


Both so good, in my opinion, and I have a crush on everybody in that cast.


Fair, fair.


I'm in my celebrity Stan era. I've never had one of those, but I'm currently...




Yeah. I would fight under a Zendaya thread or something.


Okay, Okay, so you, historically, do not know the names of actors. Yeah. Would you say you know the names of Dune actors? Okay.


Okay. Timothy Chalume.




He's a lead. Zendaya. Don't know her last name. But she's known as Zendaya, right?


I think she just goes by Zendaya.


God, what an icon. Only known by one. She's so cool. She's so fucking cool. I literally love her.


Every time I see her outfits, I'm like...


She just kills it. She's so cool. Yeah.


Speaking of, sorry, quick tangent. Oh, wait. The outfits of We're Really Cool in the movie.




The ounce of-I didn't want to give you the name. Do you know the name of? Of? I feel like you wouldn't know the name of this one.


The name of who?


The one with the chainmail crystal. Florence. Yeah.


Pooh, Puff, Peuh, Peuh.


I'll give it to you. Yeah.


Florence Peuh. I love Florence.


For those of you who don't know, I am notoriously really bad with names. It is one of my greatest insecurities, and I don't know what is up with my brain where I just can't remember people's names, but I'm really working on it.


I have trouble, too, sometimes. I wish everyone more name tags or something. Yes. I know it'll be awkward, be like, Hi, nice to meet, and then look down a little bit.


But I need it. Florence Puh. Puh. Puh. Puh. Okay. I love her. I literally love her.


She's awesome.


Don't know her name, and that's okay. My love transcends her name. She was in Midsommar?


Yeah. She was fantastic.


The one that plays the Mom, I think her name is Rebecca, but I really don't know. I could be pulling that out of absolute thin air. Oh, really? Yeah.


Oh, my You're getting better.


I learned to make associations with the word.


Is this what you learned from Tensen? Yeah.


Tensen said that the way she remembers people's names is if she just makes... I don't know. Maybe she'll be like, Oh, Rebecca. Robot. Whatever it could be. She just picks it and goes with it.


Do you remember what hers was for me?


Oh, my God. She said you're not John or something. Yeah.


It was her memory palace for me was when she sees me, she sings a song that's like, That guy's tall, not John. And somehow, broed it.


I see.


So I need to start doing that.


You have a very nice name. Jody? Yeah, Jody Lee. It's like an author's name.Thank you.Yeah. I can see it written on a novel.


I've only met one other Jody in my life, and it was when I was younger. She was at my brother's basketball game. She was 54 years old. That's it. I don't know any other Jody's. Never met a single one.


Did you have a smoker's voice?




Jody's good. Broden's also really unique. I don't know any Brodens.


My name is a last name.


Broden? Yeah.


So my grandmother's name. That was her name. I had a weird instance at E3 once where I was walking around and then I saw someone, and her name on the name tag was Lexie Broden. And then she saw me and was like, I saw Broden Plet. Then we ran to each other from across the con and we were like, What's to do with your name? What's to do with your name? She looked Asian, but she's like, I'm part Swedish. Are you? I'm like, I'm Swedish. She goes, I actually come from a family of Brodens. There's a whole town of Brodans.


It'd be so funny if they were all tall. I just imagine a Rick and Morty planet where it's just you. It's just little Brodens A big Brodans, all kinds of Brodans.


What's funny is she said three things. She's like, Yeah, I come from a whole family of Brodans. There's a whole town of Brodans in Sweden. There's a whole graveyard of Brodans.


You should be buried there. Wow.




That's cool. You should be buried in the center with a giant... What is that called? Stone, stone, stone, stone.


Just a stone. What is that called? A boulder?


No, the thing that you put your name on, that it's on the tip of my tongue.


Oh, tombstone.


Tombstone. Stone. Stone.


Thank you for the image. Why do you guys want to be buried? Do you want to be cremated?


I don't want to be cremated. Cremated? Cremated.


It reminds me of the word cremia, which is my favorite ice cream in Japan.


Yummy scrumptuous.


Cremia is so good. A little bit of reasoning. Why does that sound like cremated? Cremated. Creamy. Cream.


Never going to hear that word in the same again.


I want to be a... Wait, sorry. What was the...


I asked the question. You asked the question, Lily. You asked the question.


It's getting bad, guys.


I actually really want... I think they cream it you now and then turn you into a diamond or something, or they can plant a tree.


It'd be cool to become part of nature. I would want to be a part of-I mean, no matter what, you're becoming part of nature.


So it's just a matter. That's true. But it's a specific nature. You choose. I do love the idea of being a stone or something, and then somebody could wear me or whatever they want. Oh, get compressed into a stone. Yeah. What if they compressed me and I turn into a little diamond? They wear a locket. A little shade, they say. Yeah.


You compressed them to a diamond and then put into one of those chainsaw blades and just cut trees down your whole life?




Or they can put you into a bench and people can read books on it. That'd be cute.


That just remind me of those. Have you seen that photo of a bench that's dedicated to someone? And on the bench, it says two, I don't know her name, Julie. We were girls together. I know. That's so sad. It's so sentimental.


That's very nice.


Was that in New York?


Central Park? I'm not sure where it was, but I saw a photo of it. It's pretty popular on TikTok.


I feel like I would want to be creamated and sprinkled somewhere you're not supposed to be sprinkled.


You can't do cream and sprinkle. I'm just thinking of ice cream, bro.


Where is you're not supposed to? What does that mean?


I would sprinkle you That's not a theme park.


That's somewhere that you couldn't be sprinkled. But I'm not saying I don't want to be sprinkled there. You would ask someone to bring your urn on a ride and just sprinkle it as they're going.


The person behind you, What the fuck is my urn? What the hell is that?


Either that or... There's always like, sprinkle me in the sea. It'd also be cool to get shot into space.


Oh, yeah.


Hey, NASA, I know you probably don't take request, but... But?


Well, people can... I don't even have to be shot up there. I could just be put into those balloons and then lift it up and then it-But you're not going to space.


pops when you're out there. You're popping in the sky.


I think so. I could be wrong. Oh, you're right because I think at a certain point, it just stops there.


You're definitely not making it. I would like to be sprinkled in a lake, I think.


Sprinkled in a lake. I want to be flowers. I'm just growing into nature. Any flower? I'm not going to be in nature anyway. No, I think I'm going to want to be lilies. They're my favorite flowers.


Are they really?




I would hope so.


I would hope so, too. Yeah. Well, they're okay. They kill cats.


They do kill cats. But you don't have cats.


But once I got a bouquet of lilies, right? And some of the lily powder fell in my room. And I think Tammy licked it up a little bit, and she got really sick, too. So they make dogs sick, too, I guess.


They're generally just toxic plants. They're just toxic plants. But they're beautiful, which is such a bummer. I know.


Beautiful plants. So poisonous. Poisonous. So Michael doesn't get me lilies anymore. All my What's your favorite flowers?


My favorite flowers are generally toxic to cats. What's your favorite flower? Plumerias, Hydrangeas, and peonies are my top three.


Do you have a favorite flower?


Yeah. I know what all of those look like. Yeah.


Oh, okay. Never mind.


I actually do know hydrangea, but I don't... I know lotuses.


I feel like that was my favorite flower.


Plomerias are beautiful. It was magnolias, I think. Magnolia.


Maybe. Like, flower names are so...


Hey, Jamie, can you pull up magnolia, please? I love words that end with E.


Well, wait. Could you look up the... I think it's called the Ghost Orchid or Ghost Lotus. Orchid is what I meant to say, not Lotus.Oh.


You like orchids?Yeah. Something about orchids freak me out.




I don't like...


That's a beautiful flower.


It looks like a person with their legs.


It's vagina-like.


It is very... Very unique.


Yeah, I don't know. Very cool. That, to me looks like a vagina.


Can you look up them? To me, before you go, to me, I see a guy like this going like...


Oh, I see. I see a woman. Wait, okay. I'm going to stand up for this.


He's got a crazy hat.


Yeah, that's what I see.


Oh, that's funny. Okay, wait. Here. I see this, and he's got a crazy hat on, like a Wizards hat going.


I see a tiny little Pixie fairy thing going, yuppie.


I see that. I also see the top part is its snout looking up, and that little circle thing is its bow tie, and it's going, Yuppie. Same concept. It's just looking up.


Oh, yeah, I see it. I see it.


Like a frog. Could you look up flower pompom? Is that what it's called? I like those two. Yeah. I like these because I can-Oh, these?


They're so cute.


They're so cute. I can imagine little eyes on them, like pomeranian.


Wait, in nature, they're adorable, but I hate them in bouquets. But as I'm Seeing them in nature, that is adorable. They're little pompons.


Pompons. Flowers are so cool. They're like natural natures.


So vibrant.




And all toxic to my cats.


Did you guys look up plants growing up? Why do you know so many flowers?


My mom has a garden, but I think it's just knowing your favorites. You look at that and you like it. I don't know all flower names.


I don't know all the ones I like. Growing up, for boys, it felt like all boys knew cars and what they were called and guns and what they were called. Guns? Yes. They'd be like, Dude, that's a 50 cal sniper. And he's using AK-47 and an M14. And I'd be like, What are those? These are letters and numbers.


Girls, it's flowers and colors. I like your periwinkle blue.


Oh, colors are generally very specific.


But I was just like, are you guys opening gun manuals and just memorizing the names? Why do you know all this?


I, unfortunately, am not a man and cannot speak on that. And I don't know a single gun name other than anything from Valorant or Call of Duty.


The Deagle.


I do think the guns are probably from Call of Duty or something, but they're young.


We're in something-It has to be from a video game.


Yeah, because it's so popular, like shooter games.


What about the cars?


Cars are everywhere. I feel like they're just everywhere.


Yeah, I think I know some. Not specifics. I got a Corvette T-shirt.


Prius, Toyota, Hyundai, oh, shit. Ford, the Jeep. Is that a type of car?


Yeah, Jeep is.


Yeah. Okay. Like a Jeep Wrangler.


Yeah. Whenever we play like, King's Cup, and we get the categories, and we get the cars.


Everyone says cars once. Okay, here we go.


Okay, Jody, pull it out from somewhere. Tesla.


Mercedes, Lexus, BMW.


It's BMW. It looks, yeah. Those are good. Yeah, I just hope that somebody else... I will eventually run out. I got five on the top of my head.


Yeah, we should do vehicles next time.


I will lose.


Yeah, you got some? Ducati.




Ninja Kawasaki. Go on. Yamaha.


It's a piano.


Yamaha makes Supermoto. It is also, yeah. Which really confuses me.


They make a lot of things.


Yamaha makes everything. It's pretty cool.


Many eggs, many baskets.


Yamaha Motorcycle as well.


Just the three? You got the three?


Hey, that would be enough to make her for sure. I don't have to drink.


Three rounds?


Three rounds, yeah.


Was that Sydney?


That sounded like Toad from Mario Yeah. Or R2D2.


R2. It was R2. Yeah, I heard that. I was like,. I also really enjoy... For some reason, during Overwatch streams, Sydney sounds like Finn from Adventure Time when she screams.


What does Finn from Adventure Time sound like?


He does this like-He has a specific scream.


I'll have to listen to it.


You have Finn's scream compilation on YouTube. It's very specific.


It's very specific.


All right. I'll look that up later.


I know Lud's bike. It's a Triumph. What is it? A Triumph.


Triumph? Yeah.


And I got the BMW S1000.


Damn. What?


That's all I got. You named my third one. Or my third and fourth were Ducati Monster and Ninja Kawasaki.


Ninja Kawasaki is the one I know. The Yamaha MT07.


These are all bikes that friends have.


Michael has that one. You know in the logic, they're going on this bike trip in Japan.


Yeah. When is that? When do they leave for that?


I think it's May. They're going on a little motorcycle adventure. Oh, my For two weeks, they're going to bike across Japan. It's dream.


I remember Michael talking about that actually two, three years ago.


I think it's really cute. They're going to have a great time.


That's so exciting. Are they going to go from literally north to south, like tip to tip?


I have no idea, but it sounds fun. If I rode a motorcycle, I would love to do that.


That sounds like a core memory for your.


I would learn how to ride a motorcycle just to go on that. Just to do that?


I almost want to learn how to ride a motorcycle so I can follow them. Do you guys think I could learn how to ride a motorcycle?


Jason and Michael taught me how to start it up, move, go forward, and turn.


I don't know, Lily.


You know how to drive? I know enough. You're rather clumsy. You're rather clumsy. Yeah, maybe start with that. I am. But maybe this is like... It's like life or death, so I have to learn.


See, I didn't think that people could be clumsy. I genuinely just didn't understand.


When she prefaces it with us.


It's bad. I didn't know anyone in my life. I just thought clumsy was a thing that you saw in sitcom. And then I met Lily P. Chou.


It's pretty bad, yeah.


And I'm just like, Oh, my goodness. I don't know. I'm just surprised you have toes still, like with how much you stumble over them or hit something.


Now I'm really careful going downstairs. That's good. It's scary. I think Michael holds the back I love my T-shirt when I'm going down the stairs in front of him because he's legitimately scared I will fall down and die. Yeah.


I also am legitimately scared for you.


I feel like that's how I'm going to go one day. I'm just going to be like, Oops, I tripped, ' and I hit in my head.


To be fair, I'm pretty sure it's a pretty high percentage on elderly people. That's how they die because you fall and then you have an injury that you cannot recover from. So you're probably not far off. Yeah. No, I would say maybe you can steer clear of riding motorcycles. You can just ride on Michael's. He can drive you.


That's true. Yeah, but it'd be cool.


Yeah, but think how cool it is to be a passenger princess. That's sick. Yeah. And you were alive. That's pretty cool.


I like the alive part. Yeah, that's pretty sick. I like the alive part. Yeah. The Ninja Kawasaki.


Can you imagine?


You were on the back, huh? It's fun.


It was this fucking fire.


You feel A lot of wind in your hair. It's crazy, right?


It's a cool thing, but it's so dangerous. So cool, but so dangerous. And they wear all these things to protect them, but it feels like one wrong accident, and it doesn't matter. Scary. Anyway.


I feel like one day I'm going to have a crazy spill down the stairs. Once a week? Because I run.


You have to be careful, man.


I go from bedroom. If I need to fill up water, bedroom to kitchen, I'm running. I'm running down the hallway, down the stairs, in the kitchen, and back. Sometimes when I'm coming down the stairs, there's a moment where the foot almost doesn't catch. I slip through and I catch on the next step. That happens frequently to me. If I'm not sharp anymore, I'm gone.


I like to categorize my life as pre-EDC and post-EDC. Pre-edc, I was a flighty girl. I was going down the stairs like you. I didn't care, right? Edc happened. You know those stairs when you're going down to the bleacher area, right? And it wasn't watching.


You literally, you You were entering.


Yeah. The first stairs. Yeah, the first set of stairs into the EDC place. I stepped wrong on a stair and twisted my ankle. I still remember. It hurt so fucking bad. I thought it sprained. It was broken. It hurt so bad. And ever since then, going down the stairs has not sure if it's the same. I did it one more time, by the way. I wasn't paying attention, and I went down the stairs wrong, twisted my ankle. Same ankle. Was it the same ankle? I'm pretty sure it's the same ankle. So now I'm deadly afraid. I hold on to the rails. I'm very careful. Sometimes, when you go down the stairs, it's like, left, right, left, right. Sometimes it's like, left, and the right goes on the stair at the left. Just to be safe. But my life changed after that day.


I'm having a vision of you when you're older and you have that thing that you lock to the stairs and it sends you up. You sit in it. Oh, God.


Yeah, that's your motorcycle.


Yeah. But people also like that, tripping, slipping in showers, right? So that scares me, too. I want to buy one of those anti-slip, the friction thing because-I'm going to eat my words and slip in a shower.


You are going to eat your words and slip in a shower.


I feel so stable in a shower.


I don't- Everyone, it's just a matter of it could happen. Yeah. Could happen.


Yeah, but anything could happen, technically.


I even thought that today because I got water in my ear, and I start doing the thing where you hop in the shower. I hopped once, and I was like, Okay, I don't feel like I'm going to slip, but there is a chance. And this is a terrible place to slip, so I stopped. Because you just never know. You never know.


Just be safe. There was one time I choked on nothing. I think I swallowed air.


Let's put Lily in a giant bubble.


I swallowed my saliva and air. Something went wrong, and I just started coughing uncontrollably. I'm like, Man, anything at this point, right?


Anything's out to get you. Air, water.


There was one time I was eating like, carby, and you know how it can be a little stringy? The string got stuck in my throat and I couldn't breathe. And I started like, I can't breathe to my friends. And they're like... So I had to reach the app down and took it out. And the server... Because I was coughing, right? And then the servers were looking at me like, What do we do? I reached out, pulled it out, and then I'm like, Oh, my God. That was scary. I thought I was going to die there. And then after that... It was really cute because they came over after that and they had scissors and they cut up my meat into tiny little pieces for me because they were scared that I would die in the restaurant. Like a baby. It's a baby, bro.


It's a bib and everything.


So choking scares me, too. Because if you're not... I don't know. Your esophage is just so tiny and stuff. Man, everything can kill you.


At what point do we say it's a skill issue?


I think it's an existence issue. I think I just got nerfed. It is what it is. I don't know how to fix that. How do you fix choking on nothing? How do you fix...


Yeah, that's just you were nerfed.


I'm not sure what to do. I try to be careful, but if I'm careful about one thing, I'm not careful about eight other things I'm not paying attention to.


It's because you're so good at other things.Thank you.Thank you. You can play piano, sing, you're good at art.


Almost died going down the stairs, but I can play piano. Hey, and that's... I like that. Yeah. I like that.


They had to nerve you in some way. Yeah, thank you.


I totally agree with you.


Like, Brogan, Brogan's not good at anything, which is why he's fine running up and down the stairs. Yeah.


Brogan is tall.


That's all I've got.


But he can stand upright in a shower.


You're very stable. I got two things. You're tall and you can stand in the shower. Wow. There's this one thing I read. I'm sorry. I'm just thinking about weird ways to die now. It was the story where this girl was like, What's a girl? I don't know, whatever. Some person was allergic to peanut butter, but their SO had a peanut butter sandwich, and then they kissed, and they got an anaphylactic shot. Yeah, that's scary, too.


That's terrifying. I actually do. I am scared of going into an anaphylactic shot. I've thought about that. I was like, I feel like I, of all people, should have an Epipen.


Do you have allergies?


In general? Yeah. Do you know exactly? No. See, I don't know what it is. I think I'm allergic to my cats. I have rather many rashes, but they're generally near my lymph nodes. Sometimes I a bump in my arm pit lymph node. I got issues. I think I should have an happy bed. You should take allergies.


Go get an allergy test.


Yeah, see, I got my blood drawn and did food allergies. Nothing came back.


At least, I'm glad I'm I'm allergic to food because it sounds really inconvenient. That ruined your life. But I am allergic to other stuff.


I knew a pair of roommates who... They like to joke around in a rough house. They had that relationship. But one of them was allergic to peanuts or peanut butter. One day, we came over to their house. There's four or five guys that live there. But one of them, we walked down the hallway or past the hallway, and we see one of them with his hand putting peanut butter on the guy's door handle. We're like, Hey, what are you doing? He goes like, He didn't pay rent, so I'm going to do this.


He didn't pay rent, so I'm going to kill him.


So he He can't get in his room until he pays us, and then I'll clean it off. They're like, Oh, that's … But what happened? That could be dangerous. The guy came home and he goes, It's really funny, man. Can you clean that off? I can't pay. My computer's in there.


I woke up once and I'd have dreamed that my throat was closing up. I actually woke up because I was panicking, right? I woke up with swollen fingertips and swollen I missed because I was having an allergic reaction, and that scared the shit out of me.


Do you know to what? I don't know. Wait, that happens to me.


I'll be sitting in bed, just sitting in bed, nothing's changed. All of a sudden, my throat feels like... And my throat is all scratching. So I'm like, I'm like, I wonder what that is. Hope it goes away.


She got allergy tests. I heard they change every seven years. I'm not sure how true that is, though.


I hope I'm coming up with my seven and then eventually it'll just go away.


I heard people developing allergies later in life. Yeah. And I don't like that. I don't like the thought about that.


See, that's for sure true. Both my parents suffer severely from allergies now. My mom eats egg. Hives. Hives everywhere. My dad has one almond. Hives. Hives everywhere. He's itchy, eats lamb.


Itchy, itchy hives. When did their Mutant gene activate? When were they not allowed to eat these?


I would say my mom recently found out what had maybe... I would say in the last five years for both of them.






We got time.


Well, I don't I have time, but I'm hoping I got that figured out under wraps rather soon.


Nice. We covered allergies, falling in the shower, going on the stairs.






I think we hit it all. Speaking of wraps, You sang us an intro song. Can you sing us an outro song to wrap things up?


I think you should keep the one jingle because people won't remember two jingles. They remember one jingle associated with the podcast.


Cool. Maybe just for this episode, we'll get an outro, though. That'd be fun.


I don't know how to... I can't think.


I thought she was really artistic and super talented, but I guess she's just clumsy and not that talented.


She had three, maybe four things.


Now it's just dwindling Coming down, right? Yeah. Yeah, I understand. Wait, what time is it?


10:47 PM.


I thought this was 11:30.




How long it goes still? Yeah, you were asking me for an outro.


That's perfect because we do have a Patreon segment.


Oh, that's what it is. But there's I just assume there's so much awkward silences. Not my fault, by the way. They're the host.


We've got at least an hour.


I have this nasty boil on my lip. It won't go away. Boil.


Can you want to see it?


Yeah, I do. Don't show I'm not going to show the camera.


Oh, it's like a cancersore.


It's not. I know what cancersores feel like.


Oh, it doesn't hurt. It doesn't hurt. In the same way.


No, it doesn't hurt at all, actually. It's just been there for a month. Did you bite it on accident?


Is that what it started from? No.


Just randomly. It's not going to go away.


We all got issues. Something's wrong with us.


What's wrong with you right now? The one thing.


My gut microbiome only has three of the important bacteria in it, and the other three are just completely missing.


So what does that mean? You can't...


Generally, I'm not really healthy. If my acne, for example. Yeah. So I got to take some probiotics. Probiotics? Of the six, there's three that are just...


Do you know why? I don't know.


I have an overgrowth in yeast, which is generally super common, but probably takes up the real state of the...


You just have a lot of yeast.


Yeah, I just have a lot of yeast. Can you? Okay. No. This is up with me.


What's wrong with you?


What's wrong with me is I'm thinking of how to bridge the seam of when you made a cut point to now here.


You just hard-cut. What's wrong with you.


Yeah, that's honestly what I was thinking.


I think it's really funny. So what's wrong with you?


Are we cutting to this? We're cutting to this.


We've been talking a lot about deaths and stuff. It just got me to thinking everyone has a shitty thing about them? What's your shitty thing? Did you like that segue?


I'm sorry. That was pretty good. I think that was pretty good.


Really, that was goddamn beautiful.


Thanks, Brogan.


What's wrong with me?


Yeah, what's wrong with you? Name one thing wrong with you right now.


Wait, I can name what's wrong with Brogan.


Okay. He's too tall.


Well, he will probably die a little earlier.


I hate that. I try not to think about that.


But it can't be that much earlier. You're fine. He has a thing under his eye that's been there for, well, literally a year. Oh, you forgot about it? Maybe it's become an entirely different entity.


I've had it for a year now, I think. It gets bigger and smaller. I've learned, if anyone would like to know, this is called a kalasia.


A kalasia? Yes.


Actually, this is a great PSA.


It sounds like a mystical being. Yeah.


Calaisian, yeah.




Sounds like something I find in the lake.


Wait, that's a bug.


A kalasia is a bug, but a kalasia is what I have on my eye.




Calaisian, yes. How do you spell it?


What a pretty name.


This is a PSA to get good doctors. Because I went to a doctor to see this. Because I had this thing, and then everyone was saying it's... What's it called? Stime? Yeah, it's a stye. They were like, Yeah, it's a stye. It'll go away. I'm like, Okay. Didn't go away for a month. Didn't go away for six weeks. I'm like, I'm going to go see a doctor. I go see a doctor, and he goes, Yeah, it's a stye. I go, No, I don't think it is. He goes, Okay, I'll send you to an eye doctor because I don't know what it is then. I'm like, Okay, can I have the contact? He goes, No, I'll mail it to you. I can't give it to you. I go, Okay. I leave I go home, never get anything. Call the officer. They're like, No, we sent it. We can't say it to you. We mailed it to you. I've now decided to just switch to a different doctor because I have friends who are like, Go to this guy. He's great.


You should really get that checked out, man.


Well, I learned on my own what it was.


What is a calasian?


A calasian is like... Okay. A sti is something that forms on the outer membrane of the eye, and it's irritated. A calasian is something once you're 28 and on, you might get it. It's on the inner membrane of the eye, and it doesn't hurt at all. But I think it's similar to a stye in that something is blocked, a pore is blocked. It's on the inside, though, so it can't release. What you're supposed to do is in the first month or two of having it, hot compresses for every day, every three hours. You have to forcefully push it to release it. What the heck? If you don't do that, it can harden, and then you need to have it surgically removed or steroided. That's what I probably have to get now.


I always wondered what it was because I have seen that for a very long time.


You're going to have to get a needle close to your eye. Yeah. You're scared of needles.


But maybe it can be part of your How do you feel about your shoulder now?


I'm more down for the needle than the cutting because the needle is less invasive.




I went to sit and was like, Can you get it open?


Maybe we can call it Coley.


Coley. Coley. Coley's cute. Coley. How's little Kauly? How's little Kauly, too, isn't it?


I like Lazy-N more. I like the end of it more.




Lazy-n. Lazy-n, you look so cute today.


Rather red. Are you irritated?




Now I have a story.


Now you have a story?


I'm like the story behind it. Oh, yeah. Now I know what it is.


Do you have any abnormally... Like something on your body that's just been there and you're just like, Oh, it just is what it is.


My boil now, I guess.


It's become one with you.


It's been there way too long. I'm like, Go away. It's not going. I don't know what to do. I use mouthwash, vitamin C.


Hydrogen peroxide?


No. Hydrogen peroxide. Is that a mouthwash?


No, it's just an antibacterial type.


It's like a bathroom cleaner.


You can use it for period blood stains, mouth sores, anything like that.




I have some if you'd like to borrow.


Well, I will try.


I have a cyst in my jaw. It's been there for years. I don't know. There's just a little bump that I feel here, and it's a little packet of... It's a cyst, and it moves left and right.


You got one of these, but in your jaw.


It's a little bigger, but flatter, wider. Got one of those.


Do you have a name for it?




We should name it Cynthia.


Cynthia. She feels like a boy.


Boy, really? Yeah.


Sif Lord.


Okay. Do you hate him?


Does he create hate in you? No, no, no. It was the first name I came up with. He doesn't like that.


He doesn't like that. Hold on, I'm listening. He's communicating.


Can you be his voice?


He doesn't like that.


Ask him what the lottery numbers are.


3, 7, 17, 4, 48, 5. The Powerball? No, I don't know how many that were. I don't know. He says, I don't know. I'm not alive. I can't buy a lottery ticket. He said.


The Powerball was like 1.something billion, and someone in New Jersey won it. Could have been you, Lily.


Could have been you.




You won the lottery already with your friends and your life and your work and your boyfriend.


Yeah, we're not enough for you.


And that was Jody and Broden.


I think that is a good place to stop. You can watch more of us on our Patreon in the bonus episode.


Curious how this is going to be edited.


But until then, we'll see you guys in two weeks.


Thank you for watching.