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On today's part, in my take, we have a new guest. Jeff Saturday, former coach of the Indianapolis Colts. Last year also won a Super Bowl. Peyton Manning center. We talked ball with him, talk what it's like in that playoff push. Great conversation with him. We then are going to preview every single game from week 15. I'll say it right now, one of our funnier weekend previews of the season. Because we were loopy, we were low on sleep, we took twists. We took turns. We got our picks. We got fuck boys, we got fire fest. A great show for everyone. And it is brought to you by a takeover. Apple takeover today. Go right now on Apple TV plus. The family plan. It's now streaming on Apple TV plus. Starring Mark Wahlberg. When his past catches up to his president and an assassin turned dad embarks on an action and adventure packed road trip to save his family. The family plan now streaming on Apple TV plus. Rated PG 13. Mark Wahlberg, recurring guest, a pardon my take. Go support him. The family plan now streaming on Apple TV plus. If you don't watch it right now, well, guess what?

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Now in the street, there is violence and a lot of work to be done. No place to hang out or washing and then I can't blame all on the sun oh, no, we got a rock down to electric I Renu. And then we'll take it higher oh, we gonna rock down to electric it's.

Pardon my take, presented by Barcelona Sports.

Welcome to part of my take today is Friday, December 15. And boys, I think Brandon Sally might get fired or he's fired already. He might be fired overnight. He might be fired right after this game because we're taping the rare taping in the third quarter of Thursday night Football. It is 42 to zero. The Las Vegas Raiders versus the Los Angeles Chargers. Pft, he's gone. He has to be gone right now.

Either that or we learned today that maybe the Minnesota Vikings defense is just awesome for holding the Raiders scoreless for an entire game. But this is like as bad a performance as I've ever seen. And I'm a fan of the Washington football team, Redskins commanders. Like, I've seen teams quit before. Big cat, you've seen teams quit, quitter. This is quiet quitting right now. They're just not even playing anymore. Brandon Staley, I guess there's worse places to be fired than Las Vegas.

True.

Seems like if you get fired in Vegas, at least do it before I have to go to bed, wake up early, get on a flight back the next like, just tell me right now. You get a free night in Vegas. You've got checks coming in, you're going to get paid for the next several years. No matter. Let, let the boys have a fun night in Vegas.

I actually think if he got fired in Vegas, I think he could probably interview for the Raiders job tomorrow and be like, mark Davis, I don't know if you know this, but I went to the playoffs last. I did we play you last? No, no, that was a different guy. Don't worry about it.

You bring up an interesting point, big cat. What if there's like a little handshake deal going on right now between Mark Davis and Brandon Staley? Like, I want to hire you as my next coach as a show of good faith. Just let us beat the fuck out of you for a full game. If you go along with that, then you could just.

Yeah, yeah, we'll make that deal. I'll unload on the Raiders and I'll get to go to P. F. Chang's for life.

There you go. So Mark Davis puts a fuckload of money on the Raiders to cover tonight. Brandon Staley, you'll be my next coach. He then has enough money to pay off John Gruden.

Yes.

And Josh McDaniels. And then he's got a little bit of money and there's some clown shit going on right now. The Raiders just did a trickeration play for another touchdown to Devontae Adams.

I've never seen a team quit as much as the Chargers are quitting right now. I know Justin Herbert's out, but this is like a full on quit. It was so bad that they were showing. I think it was. Whose tattoos was it? Max Crosby's tattoo. With like ten minutes left in the second quarter, Alan Kirk were already in garbage time. Like they started burning their garbage time material so goddamn fast. I'm actually worried for what? I don't know what he's going to say in this fourth quarter. That might be the only reason to tune in.

He shouldn't even be on the broadcast anymore. Let Al go out to the steakhouse. Let him start with the scotch. We don't need announcers anymore in this game. I think just having a close up of Brandon Staley, we don't even need to watch the game. Yeah, let's just watch Brandon Staley for the rest of this game.

It's crazy. And guess what? The other thing, we buried the lead here. Pft, you were up first with Shake Shack. So Raiders minus two and a half. I'm going to call it right now. I think we can call it 49 nothing.

Yeah, I'll allow that.

We'll call it.

Yeah. I tweeted like, I was like, great job. BFT thanks. BFT thanks. Shake shack. And you're like, don't mush.

It's like it was 28 nothing at the time.

I think the Chargers have quit so fast in this game. It was like almost instantly.

And Max is really enjoying the shake shack right now. He's a big boy. That's a big sandwich for a big boy. It takes a lot of food to fill my big boy's big belly up. And yes, that shake shacks do the trick. Listen, if for nothing else, I'd like to be remembered as the man that got free chicken sandwiches for yes.

So. So starting Monday, free chicken shacks on PFT because he got so. But we have more coming. I'm picking the Lions minus three and a half. Yeah, I got a good line for this deal, everyone. Don't worry about it. Let's try to get the Lions minus three and a half. If that one hits free bacon cheese fries on top of the chicken shacks on Monday. And Hank, what's your Sunday pick?

Rams.

Rams minus six and a half. And that will be a free classic shake. On top of this, we're trying to go three and o for the people. If all of those hit, you get all three. But right now, Pft's got you the free chicken shack starting Monday. So it's the three for free promotion. You're welcome, everyone. Lunch just got decided on Monday because the Raiders want the Chargers. So a couple other things about this game. Shout out, shake shack. Shake shack. Cam with Max. So root for the lions, root for the Rams, and then we get all three on Monday, which we're going to do, boys. Right, our Monday lunch is planned. We had some of those chicken sandwiches today. They were so good. And thank you for shake shack, for bringing them by. And the woman who brought them by, it was like, oh, free chicken shacks.

Great.

Yeah, she was the best. And they are really good chicken sandwiches.

Yes. So a couple of things.

Pft.

I have a couple of questions for you first. So Aiden O'Connell didn't throw that touchdown pass, correct? No, they should have. These are the games that just go for records. Aiden O'Connell had four touchdown passes in the first half. The record is seven, which is tied by a bunch of, like, everyone's been in this game in Madden or like college football. Just go for records.

I want to see it get so much worse. If it's going to be a bad game, I want the worst things to possibly happen. So, yeah, I want the Chargers to keep fumbling. I want the Raiders to keep doing fuck shit on offense. I want Aidan O'Connell to throw for ten touchdowns. I want Mark Davis to come down on the sidelines shirtless, just dancing around. I want Brandon Staley to get assaulted by his own team. I want a complete shit show if.

This is going to go off the.

Rails like this, give everything to my question. The other question I had for you PFT, is I got old takes exposed tonight our friend old takes exposed is going back for Brandon Staley tweets. And I said, I think it was that press conference where Brandon Staley was talking about his fourth down thoughts like, I want to be aggressive. And I was like, Chargers got it right with Brandon Staley is from 2021. Brandon Staley was a good coach for a year. His brain melted. Something happened in the last two years where everything changed. But remember when Brandon Staley came on the scene? He was a breath of fresh air. We had him on this show. I was jealous of the Chargers, everything. So I guess my question is this, is Brandon Celia a bad coach or did the Chargers just get into his brain like lead poisoning?

I think he's a great coach right now because they're tied seven seven in the second half. The Chargers just score a touchdown.

So don't write the Chargers ahead of me. It's insane. Don't write good Internet streaming has somehow made it so that everyone in America watches games at different times. I don't think there's one house that's the exact same.

There should be one. There should be one like how they have Greenwich meantime and like Big Ben is the clock that everybody goes off. There should be one computer that's playing the game and that's like, this is the actual time. Try to sync up as close as possible to it. But yeah, the Chargers are now seven, seven second half, so don't write him off just yet. Brandon Staley mounting a furious comeback, but he was a good head coach. Don't let what's happened recently fool you. He was a good coach that first year. What always has sucked about him, though, is his defense, which is weird. He's a defensive coach and his defenses are always in the bottom. Like five of the NFL. They've had some bad injury luck. I will say that the Chargers seem to be more injured than any other franchise, with maybe the exception of the. But they all, they always get guys banged around. They never have their best players out there. But Brandon Staley, he's not a good defensive coach at all. The fourth down thing, that is great if you're winning, but if your defense is such shit that you don't even have an opportunity to flex your fourth down analytics muscles, then it's a big issue.

Plus, really, you could say Brandon Staley has set the analytics community back like 40 years. Yeah, because he's known as the analytics poster boy, the wonder kid of the analytics movement. And the fact that his teams have fallen apart so terribly really makes you think, like, I don't want my head coach ever look at a number again.

Yes, you're absolutely right. He's ruined it for everyone else. This game is so bad, though. It's so bad. It is giving me flashbacks. She's mentioned at the start PFD that we've seen this before for our teams. It gave me a flashback that Hank's going to have a chuckle for. Remember that, Hank? I'm pretty sure the packers were up 42. Nothing on the Bears, and it was like Aaron Rogers was playing a video game and I was sitting in a hotel room in Arizona and Dave and Hank were with me and they just sat next to me and just laughed in my face for an entire half. There's been some bad, know, you just got to regroup. Maybe Easton stick will get hot in the second half and then you can trade them to someone for like a third round pick. Well, that's the thing.

You can't even say we should take our starters out because neither team really has starters that they're playing right now.

Right.

It's like Aiden O'Connell, he's going to stay in the game. Although they keep showing Aiden O'Connell, doesn't he look a little bit like a really bad video game rendition of he's uh. Like, they don't get the Pixels just exactly right. And then they've got Easton stick and what are you going to do? Sit Easton stick down. Put.

Just like it's. I don't know what you do. I don't know what you. It's. It's a shit show for the Chargers right now. It's an absolute shit show.

Yeah.

Put in Max Duggan. If I were a player, I'd not want to come out. I'd want all the stats.

Yeah.

Although, like, the way the Chargers are playing, that's a lot of. You probably fumble the ball a lot. Everyone's fumbling on the Chargers. They should just call it a game. They should just slaughter rule it, say mercy rule, take your ball, go home, shut out the. It's just. There's no point in continuing.

It's. It's bad.

Bad.

I had one other thing before we kick it to ourselves and we're going to talk all the games on Saturday and Sunday. I had some breaking moves. Okay, so Travis Kelsey was noticeably absent during Taylor Swift's 34th birthday celebration in New York City. This is from entertainment now, but for a good reason. A source tells et that he remains committed to playing his best and doing his best on and off the field. The team practices are critical, mandatory to attend, and something he takes very seriously. So it's no surprise he stayed in Kansas City ahead of this weekend's.

Selfish boyfriend. Taylor deserves somebody that will make time for her.

I really wish I could talk to the author who spent all day trying to find sources to see if practices are mandatory. Be like, wait, so could he have skipped it? Could he have gone to the party? I'm going to double check this. Let's really find out.

Yeah, I mean, he probably could have. It's another boyfriend that won't miss work for whatever. She puts him first. She shows up all the time to his games. He can't make time to visit her. I did see a picture of her birthday party, so I've got a picture right here. She got a big. It looks like a cookie cake. And in the background, there's a guy that looks a whole lot like Jeff Darlington.

Back.

If I don't know what's going on? We've been putting the pieces together with Jeff. She has a thing for him. I don't know if Jeff's swooping in.

On Travis, Kelsey, Jeff and Taylor sitting in a tree. By the way, the Chargers team account, I like this. They just posted the touchdown and just said we scored, period. All lowercase. I like it.

Yeah.

Like, lean into it. This is a shit show. Everyone should have fun with this. I know people like when these games happen. It just becomes a roast. Let's just have fun with it. Just do weird shit. This is actually a perfect time for my fake punt punt. I like that.

Yeah, the fake punt punt would be good.

No one would see the fake punt punt coming.

Break out the downfield. Get weird with it, get experimental with it. The more I think about it, it's not the craziest thing that we've ever said that Brandon Staley has given this game to.

It will. If he was able to get some action on it, he can pay off all his debts and then start fresh. And Brandon Staley would be like, listen, I'm such a good coach. I will make sure this game is never in doubt that you win. Like, you will never even have to sweat for a second this game. That's how good of a coach I am.

Yeah.

You think if a coach was good enough, they could give you the final score of, let's just say, 55 to seven and hit it perfectly?

It'd be pretty tough. That would be like, a perfect score. It'd be pretty tough. But maybe Brandon Staley is that good. He's a savant. Oh, Chargers are starting to come back. This would be the funniest thing ever. Actually, someone had a perfect tweet. I can't remember who it was. I apologize. But they're like, this won't be a real Chargers game until they tie it 42 42 and then lose on a safety. Yeah, that's always in play with the Chargers.

That would be really good. Should we talk a little bit about the Yanis ball controversy?

Yeah, sure. The Patriots and the Bucks have a rivalry now, talking about getting their licks in and everything.

Yeah, it's good. This is good for basketball. Yanis dropped 64, I believe, and the Pacers took the game ball because Oscar Toshibwe had his first point. He scored a point, and they were like, we need to save this ball for him. And then Yanis stormed into the locker room, like, sprinted into the locker room to try to get the game ball back. My question is, the best part is.

He had the game ball?

What do you mean?

So worldwide wob, I think, broke it down. I'm pretty sure the Bucks trainer got the ball that he had that last dunk from. So he had the actual game ball. He just didn't see it.

Oh, so it was a misunderstanding.

Yeah.

Like, they had the original game ball, and I think the Pacers then took the next ball or, like, a ball around there, and so the whole thing started, and it was like they actually had the ball the whole time.

Well, that was going to be.

My question is, isn't there more than one ball?

There is more than. Well, no, there's just one ball. There is just one ball. You almost got me there.

Just one ball. Actually, no, it was a serious question because in football, you've got a bunch of different game balls, and in baseball, obviously, tons of them. But in basketball, do they just keep the ball for as long as it stays relatively inflated? I know they have backup balls.

The pictures of the hallway is so funny of Giannis being held back and everything. So I'm watching right now. It's a complete misunderstanding. The game ends, and the Bucks trainer literally runs right out and gets the ball from the ref. The original game ball. Giannis is kind of a. Huh, so good.

I didn't know he had that in. See, he always seems like a mild mannered guy, has fun with the media, like, what a psycho to go try to storm into the locker room to steal a ball.

He needs his ball. Give me the ball.

What's he going to do with that ball?

He basically was no different than, like, a Labrador being like, I need my ball back. Give me my ball.

Just, like, completely focused on the thing. My theory was they should cut the ball in half and give half of it to Oscar, half of it to Giannis, and then see which one says, no, don't cut the ball in half. I'd rather see the full ball go to the other person than you destroy it and split it between us.

Yes. I mean, let's do it. It's worked in biblical times. Which one is that?

Solomon.

Solomon.

Which one?

Samson's. The hair.

Right?

The hair. The hair.

Hair.

We also have an end to our long national nightmare. We know what Shohei Otani's dog's name is.

Oh, I didn't see this.

I got a very important push notification from the athletic on that one. His dog's name is. Hang on. Let me pull this up so I don't mispronounce it. His dog's name is decoy, but in Japanese, I think it's decopin. And that means to flick one's forehead. So he named his dog.

Ooh.

Well, no, flick is not a boop.

I think, like, flick, tap. Probably the same thing.

Yeah.

Shohei is going to be a villain now, by the way, because I'm pretty sure the Dodgers have traded for glas now from the rays and they have all this money to operate. Johan is going to be hated. If the Dodgers win, like, 120 games in the World Series, he's going to.

Be hated for sure. We hate everybody that's successful. That's kind of what we do.

But the flip side is what's going to be very funny because it's more realistic to happen, is the Dodgers are going to win 120 and then get bounced in a five game series. And everyone's going to be like, the playoff structure is wrong.

The format is off.

Yeah.

I'm looking forward to that moment. That's going to be a great day.

That would rock if that's what happens. But if they win, like, four World Series in a row, then everyone's going to be like, fuck this. Break up the LA Dodgers.

Yes. Okay, should we kick it to ourselves? I think it's time. Let's kick it to ourselves. All right, weekend preview time. It is brought to you by our friends at Uber Eats. Get delivered with Uber eats. It's football season. You can now get almost, almost anything you need for game day. Delivered with Uber eats. What do we mean by almost? An o line, definitely no, but a carton of OJ. 100% yes. Pet supplies for Blake and Stella. Absolutely. Big tight ends. No brisket, burnt ends. Ooh, we should get those on Sunday. Yes. Uber Eats can get you that. There you have it. Get almost, almost anything for game day. Deliver with Uber Eats. Official on demand delivery, partner of the NFL alcohol and select markets, and 21 plus to order. Product availability may vary by region. See app for details. Uber eats get almost anything. Order now. Thank you to Uber Eats. I ordered Uber Eats this morning. Got some bacon, egg, and cheese for everyone. You guys might not have gotten one.

I didn't get one.

I've been doing that every Thursday morning. Just a nice, like, hey, football is back. I get ten bacon, egg, and cheese. Uber eats that gets here the minute I sync up. So it shows up when I show up. And then I just put them on the front and anyone who wants them can have them.

That's for everyone.

Yeah, and usually Stefan eats, like, nine of them.

I got some greek soup. Uber eats today.

Hell yeah.

I'm doing soup all week this week. All week. Next week.

Ooh, keeping you warm. Greek soup is so good. Little lemon soup.

Yeah, I've got Lamona.

Yeah.

Okay, boys, week 15, we're in the.

Fourth quarter of the football season.

Well, here's the thing. Pft. We have this discussion. We cherish it. The minute Saturday football shows up, it's usually like, in your head, you're like, oh, yeah, NFL Saturday. I love NFL Saturday. But it is a pavlovian response of like, I shouldn't be watching this NFL Saturday. I should be doing holiday shopping.

To me, it's more like, you get a football weekend of NFL.

Yeah.

Which is nice. Like the NFL and bowl games, to their credit, they stay off Saturdays for the most part until college football is over. They stay off Fridays for the kids that are playing high school. Um, but then once college football goes away, for the most part, they're like, okay, let's fucking just take over the entire weekend.

Yep.

And so we go three Saturday, seven early Sunday, three late Sunday night. Monday night should have given us two Monday nights.

Did you see that? Next year, or maybe not next year, but they just announced that they're going to start doing eight games overseas.

I know I said this.

It's a lot of international games. It's America's game again.

We are the only ones, I think, talking about this. They are trying like damn hell to get a Super bowl overseas, and we have to stop it. So let's all not watch the first quarter next year of all these games.

So, yeah, first quarterma, maybe. No pregame.

No pregame.

I'm not watching any pregame in the Brazil game.

We're probably.

Yeah, there's a Brazil game coming.

As of yesterday, Tom Brady had a retirement wooback. Giselle.

I like that idea.

Belichick will get on that.

Belichick loves big asses.

Yep.

That's facts down there. We're about two years away, I'd say, from our first Saudi Arabia game. Yeah, probably. I would imagine the Bills would be in that.

That will be a private. That will be a private game, though. No one can watch pay per view. It would just be for some Sultan's son.

It'll just be for MBS and his boys.

Yeah, he'll just be hanging out. All right, so let's get into the games. Week 15, this is the week where, like, last week was crazy because we had a lot of bad teams on paper, beat good teams and win games. But this is the week, I think that we're going to get a very clear. Here is what the playoffs they're going to shrink down to maybe eight teams instead of right now. In the AFC, there's like eleven teams. NFC, there's eight or nine teams. Once we get through this weekend, I think it's going to be pretty clear who's going to be most likely in the playoffs because there's only be three games left.

There's a great graphic out there of it visualizes it for you. Like, I love data visualizations because I'm dumb. I need like a chart to tell me what's going to happen. It shows you how much your chances improve if you win this weekend versus how much they decrease if you win this weekend. So it looks like the Broncos have the most to gain this weekend with a win.

Yeah.

And there are some teams at the top that obviously doesn't really matter. Not, I'd say, broncos, Packers, Bucks. That's going to be a good game. The Bucks and Tampa Bay.

Yeah.

Because whoever wins that one, I think.

You should have going to be in.

A good to about like 75% or more.

I like that you said that the visual stuff because that is one of the greatest cop outs in the world. Being like, I'm more of a visual learner, it's essentially saying, I don't want to hear you talk anymore.

I also like it's a close neighbor of, you know what? I have time blindness. It's a disability that I have.

Yeah.

That's why I'm not ever on time.

It has nothing to do with the fact that I was playing candy crush while I was taking a shit for 45 minutes when I should have been getting ready.

Definitely not. But I will look at any chart and I'll pretend to understand a chart. But if you put numbers in front of me, then I'm like, it's too close to math.

Yes. Okay.

First game Saturday afternoon, Vikings Bengals. This game is actually kind of a fun game because we have the backup bowl. Jake Browning has been playing well versus Nick Mullins. Josh Dobbs is now QB three. Probably for the better. Probably for the better. The Josh Dobbs. It was fun. I think that if you want to tell the story of the 2023 season, you can't leave out Josh Dobbs. But it was time. It was time to move on.

I would put him at QB two because if something happens to Mullins and he gets hurt, Josh Dobbs might be good coming in as a backup, but they did not.

Jaren hall is QB two, but this game is fun to me because it is two backup quarterbacks. So you say on paper. Ooh that's kind of gross. But I would argue that the Bengals and the Vikings are top five in terms of weapons on either side. So the backup quarterbacks are set up pretty well. Justin Jefferson's back, so Justin Jefferson, Jordan, Addison, and Hawkinson. And then on the other know T. Higgins, Boyd, Jamar, Chase, Joe Mixon, and this new guy, Chase Brown.

He was on the Ir this season.

Yeah.

New guy to this season.

Fast as fuck.

Yeah.

It's a new name that everybody should know.

Yes. Talk to us about this game. What are you thinking?

Okay, so is Jake Browning, is he really a backup at this point? Because I feel like Jake Browning has played his way into being like, this team has a chance.

This team has a chance.

I think the Bengals actually have a chance. They could make some noise in the playoffs.

How about that?

I don't think that they have a chance to win the Super bowl, but I could see them winning a playoff game with Jake Browning.

I'm at the point now, now with the AFC, that everything's on the table because everyone's gotten injured and no team has looked dominant, that it is going to be the most wide open AFC playoffs. And when I say that, it's probably going to be the Chiefs getting the one seed. Somehow I kind of like the Vikings in this game, though, and I like them because Brian Flores, we touched on it on Sunday, that he is doing stuff that people can't even figure out with his defense. Zone blitz is just multiples. You got to say multiples when you talk about this stuff. He's doing a lot of multiples. He's got guys at every level, every single level. So, yeah, I think that this is going to be Jake Browning's first test. True test. Because the Colts and the Jaguars aren't great defenses. The Vikings have been playing like a great defense. That's going to be tough. And you're getting points. Yeah, I kind of like the Vikings in this game.

Probably going to be confusing for Jake Browning, but counterpoint, it's a Jake Browning revenge game.

That's true. He almost quit football. So he was actually, I think the story was he was, like, driving to go coach high school football when he took one more shot with the Bengals.

Thank God he did.

Yes.

This is also a big game for one particular Bengals fan, Florence Hackman. She goes by flow, okay. She's turning 105 years old on Saturday.

Okay.

And she's celebrating with her three favorite things. This girl can party. Firefighters watching football and whiskey. She's drinking fireball, having a Bunch of firefighters over to a birthday because she's horning for firemen.

Wait, how old is she?

And watching the Bengals. She turns 105 years old on Saturday.

Hell, yeah.

And she's having a.

Wait, let me see a picture.

Okay. I'll show you a picture. You want to see it?

Thank you. I'll put on the bonk list.

Florence Hackman.

When are we doing the bonk list? Should we do it next week? It's the end of the year.

I don't think Hanks hangs.

Not ready. That was not ready.

Tell me she doesn't look good for 105.

She's hot. She's real hot.

Florence Hackman having a big firefighter whiskey party, drinking fireball. Yeah, this is a party girl right here. Florence and rooting for a bangle don't.

Make a lot of Florence's anymore.

I'm rooting for this Florence.

I know when we do the when. No, no, you cannot save it for your set.

I'm going to.

No, that's bullshit. You're robbing the people of the bonk list. The bonk list was an all time moment last year, and it will be.

An all time moment.

No, I need fucking material. No, you can't do that. The bonk list, buddy. No, the bonk list you can replay. You know what? No. Here's what you could do.

You can replay it on the show.

After I do it on the. You can do a visual bonk list in the set. That's fair. Hank, how much? Cross awls. Tell Hank to release the bonk list. Tweet him and say, tweet it out. No, but you have to do it on the show.

I will.

No, I will. This is bullshit.

How much crossover is there between the bonk list and the no fly?

That's a good one.

You're picking up what I'm putting down.

Yeah.

Well, wait. You're fucking Jeff Nadu. I get it. Oh, there you go. Jake. You will figure out something to do, but I will help make you. You know what? What if I do this, okay. You release the bonk list, I will make you a slideshow for the show with the bonk list. Deal. I'll make you a slideshow.

We have to be very careful about what we say to Hank over the course of the next.

I know. Farming us.

Everything is just going to. Well, I'm not going to do that now. I'll put that in.

Yeah. He is just doing future hank. He's not going to talk for the next month and a half.

Yeah, saving it for the show.

He's not even talking right now, every.

Word that he uses right now is wasted. That could be in my set.

I have an hour to do.

Okay.

That's a perfect time for it, actually.

What about all the people that go to the show that aren't part of my take? Fans that are going there for a nice evening of comedy and all of a sudden you're doing this very inside joke about the bonker.

All right, I'll do it at that.

They're not going on.

Those people will already. Okay, okay.

We'll talk.

We'll talk off there because they're so disappointed.

Yes. Also, I'll say the idea out loud. Remind Jake. Oh, you just spilled on yourself. You're two for two.

Two for two?

Yeah, two for two in the last show is spilling Jake. Remind us when we go to Vegas. Pft. And I need to buy somewhere between, I'm going to say, 1002 thousand tomatoes that we can pass out to the crowd.

Just full tomatoes.

Yeah.

Okay.

There'll be a segment for the tomato thrown.

Well, I mean, if you're doing bad, you should get tomatoes thrown at you.

I'll start throwing them back. I'll bring a fuck gun.

Here's a fun compromise. I'll do no tomatoes. You can't do the bonquest.

No. Fine. Break.

All right, tomatoes on.

If you don't think I'm throwing them back directly at you and everyone else.

I'm not going to throw them. Other people are going to throw them. You can't throw them at me. I will. Okay, well, I'm not even going to be there.

Speaking of reminders, happy Yokich day the 15th.

Respect Yokich every other month now.

Okay, that's too much.

I'm not ready.

Did we do that following your guys direction?

No, you were.

That didn't count for this month because we just respected Yokich last week.

I was going to say tennis ball.

Gun.

And I just didn't say tennis ball. I'm not going to bring a gun. That was a little.

No, you said gun. We'll clip that and send it to the FBI. By the way, we have Hank bad.

For ratings if you murder our audience.

This has been a long week. We've been in the office a lot. We got full on goofy Hank today, which is my favorite Hank. He's goofy brained.

Also, if you're in Las Vegas, I'm pretty sure that Nevada is a standard ground state. So if Hank does have a gun, you're welcome to produce your own firearm.

Yes, that's a fact. All right. Nerd Nugget.

In the 14 meetings between the Vikings and Bengals, the road team has won just one time. The series is tied seven seven with the Bengals lead seven one in Cincinnati while the Vikings are six and O in Minnesota.

Okay, this is to decide the ultimate NFL rivalry. The Vikings or the Bengals.

That sat means nothing.

Home teams won 13 to 14.

I mean, the ones last time they played four years ago, probably.

Yeah.

These two teams don't like each other very much.

Well, no, they actually like them a lot when they come visit.

True.

Because they win. Yeah.

All right, Steelers at Colts next game. I'm going off vibes in this game. PFD. I got stats for some games. This one's a vibes game.

I got some stats for this one.

Okay, you want to go stats?

That's the Colts are six and 26 against the Steelers all time. Ursay tweeted that out himself. He's thinking about it. He's thinking about it hard. He does have the power to open up the roof, which is probably the one piece of power that Ursay has to affect the game. It's only going to be 50 degrees.

He could bring a gun.

We might get.

Yeah, he could.

Well, I don't know if he's legally allowed as true his charges, but it's going to be 50 degrees outside the roof. Could be open in Indy this weekend. So that's what I'm hoping for. Another stat. TJ Watt has been cleared by an independent neurologist, probably in Pittsburgh, probably with a terrible towel framed above his medical degree.

Wait, no, the Steelers have never done anything with bad doctors on the team.

Right?

They've never done that.

Yeah.

Was this toe to truth? Tell the truth, because that guy is Pittsburgh, right?

Yeah, no, that was what I was alluding to.

Yeah.

That was all the Steelers team doctor.

Tell the truth.

Yeah.

And then there was another thing that happened this week where Big Ben went on his podcast and said, maybe the Steelers tradition is over at this point. You've lost Big Ben. And I don't know what Big Ben thought the Steelers tradition was. I think in Big Ben's mind, the Steelers tradition was Big Ben playing quarterback. Because that's what I think about when.

Our, for everyone who's listening in Pittsburgh, you probably know this, but PFT and I trade off. We do Thursdays with our guys at WDVE, Randy Bauman and Bill Crawford. And they are down.

I'm sure it was down. It's a tough.

They, they were talking to me about Mitch and now I guess there's a rumor that the Steelers could be in the running to get Justin Fields in a potential trade. So it's essentially, it's. It's the shittier version of the packers and Jets pipeline.

Yeah.

This is going to be the Steelers. They're not going to be bad enough to draft a good quarterback.

Correct.

I still believe in Kenny.

They could make the play. I kind of believe in Kenny Pickett, too. Just because you look at the change between Mitch and Kenny, and the offense looks entirely different.

So here's the vibes. Ready for the vibes? The Steelers just lost to the Cardinals and the Patriots, two of the worst four teams in the NFL. Mitch looked really bad. The Steelers have looked really bad. You have to bet the Steelers. That's the vibe.

That is kind of how it goes with that team.

That is the vibe.

The harder they bounce back.

Mike Tomlin is not a favorite anymore. He was a favorite the last two games. That's the vibe.

There's no Jonathan Taylor.

No Jonathan. The Colts do run a lot of COVID three. Mitch does do well historically. That would be the one defense he would.

Yeah.

Wait, are we sure Jonathan Taylor's out? I want to cross check that. I know that it doesn't look likely that he's playing. Right.

Yeah.

We made this mistake with tank Dell and then.

Yes. Rap sheet.

Was that the royal we as a we all? You didn't stop me.

We made this mistake.

As a group, we are collectively responsible for tank Dell.

No, you get to.

We don't want to do that again with Jonathan.

You get to expand the circle when you're wrong. Barstool. Sports as a whole made a mistake about tank Dell.

Sports journalism.

Yeah.

The industry.

Let's go. 10,000 foot view.

You know what? Our generation made a mistake about Tank Dell saying we'd rather be first than write about it.

Yes.

We don't want to do this as millennials.

Yeah.

No, it's like the greatest generation is who fought World War II. Our generation is just the generation that got the tank tail news wrong.

Yeah.

And it's a black eye that we're never going to recover from as a whole unless we try to make steps as a group and fact check things. So Jonathan Taylor is out, per Jake Marsh. So if Jake's wrong, it's all his fault.

Yes.

Okay, Jake. Nerd nugget.

Saturdays are for the Steelers. No team has had more success on Saturdays than the Pittsburgh Steelers. Their 36 victories on Saturday are the most in the NFL since 1945.

That's pretty good.

I like that stat vibes.

I like it a lot. Mike Tomlin. I heard some rumors, and I think this went along with Big Ben's characterization of the Steelers tradition being over. I think this was Big Ben kind of calling for Mike Tomlin's job, probably for not bringing him back. That's my guess on it. But you have the conversation in, was it Steelers country? Steelers nation.

Steelers nation.

They're talking about, like, is this the last year for mediocre Mike?

One year left on his contract.

That'll be such a sweet job if you just got hired by the Steelers because, you know, you've got 20 years.

Yeah, actually, that was another to reference WDV again. They asked me about Belichick, and they're like, what do you think is going to happen there? And they're like, wouldn't it be so weird if they fired him? I was like, you guys, of course it'd be weird for you guys. You'd never get new coaches. Yeah. The Steelers can't. What? What's that?

There's been no follow up from that.

We'll get to the Patriots.

Yeah, we'll get to the Patriots.

Okay.

But, yeah. Steelers, they have, what, three coaches in the last, like, 50 years?

Yeah.

It's like being a supreme Court justice. The best job security in America. Either that or, like, Ben Mence.

Yeah.

Job for life. Job for life. But Mike, Tommy can say that.

He can.

Yeah.

Broncos at Lions. I'm excited for this game.

It's going to be a good one.

I am excited for this game.

I have a spin zone for the Lions, and we talked to Jeff Saturday in a little bit.

Right.

You're getting deuce back on defense. The defense that the Colts had when they sucked and then they ended up making a Super bowl run. Was that the same year where Bob Sanders came back, changed the entire fast. Just tell yourself that c d deuce is the missing link.

He's Bob Sanders.

He's Bob Sanders. Dan Campbell says that he's an x man. The way that he's recovered.

I love that.

Which is just a great term to say about somebody.

Yeah.

Unless you're a female swimmer. I think that he's been. Should we edit that out now? No, let's keep it in.

We're loopy.

He's been medically cleared to play football, which no doctor should ever medically clear somebody to play football. If you're a good doctor, you should never be like, okay, you can go play NFL football. Yeah, that sounds safe.

Yeah.

Here, take two footballs. Yeah, take two football games and call me in the morning.

I'm sure you'll feel better after you play football with these injuries, but you can talk yourself into your defense improving if you get a big missing part back. I think a lot of people thought that he would be a big upgrade on defense, so just tell yourself that. And I'm still rooting for the Lions. I want them to succeed. I want Detroit fans to be happy. You just have to have some form of hope right now, and I feel like that might be the one to zero in on.

I think the Lions are going to win this game. I think they're going to cover this game. The Lions at home indoors have been different. Jared Goff, indoor he's an indoor cat. He's 5% better. Completion percentage, 14 touchdowns, six interceptions, seven and four. Outdoors, everyone's been shitting on. Lions have been really bad. I was thinking about it more. The Bears are kind of, and Lions fans will agree with this. The Bears kind of do have the Lions number in the fact they don't win all the time, but they play them really tough. And so the Lions have played. Three out of the last four games have been division games, which are tough games to play, especially later on in the season. Teams know you so Packers, Bears, saints, then, then Bears again. Now they get to play the Broncos. The Broncos aren't great against the also, I have a stat for you. This is a nerd stat. Maybe it's my nerd stat of the week.

Oh, I like that.

I like that name.

Should nerd stat of the week.

Yeah.

Nerd stat of the week.

I hate that.

Yeah, that was bad. From my guys at sports Info solutions. They have all the charts and stuff. The Lions play middle of the field, open defense. Six months in the NFL, Russell Wilson is the third worst in the league against that. Can't throw over the middle. Too short.

Counterpoint how much of that has to do with Jerry Judy not being able to catch a football.

Also true. Also true. But I think this is the spot to buy back on the Lions like they're going to get home. They've not looked also like I know the Broncos are a really good story. It's incredible how they turn their season around. I still think there's a little bit of smoke and mirrors going on. I like the Lions think they're going to run the ball. I think Jamir Gibbs. I think it's a big Jamir Gibbs game.

Yeah.

So since week six, the Broncos defense is first and third down percentage, first in takeaways, second in points allowed per takeaways. Takeaways is part of it. Second in points allowed per game. Second in touchdowns allowed per game. Those last two stats have a lot to do. Also, with the takeaway factor, we're not allowing points.

What week was that from?

Since week six.

Week six.

So that's when they kind of turned it around, became these Broncos. Not those Broncos. I do like the Lions indoors. I think anytime you see your quarterback wearing two gloves when it's outside, you have that feeling like, I don't think he's ready for this unless you're Teddy Bridgewater. But I do like the Lions at home in the dome. I do think that the Broncos are still going to make the playoffs. Even if they lose this game, though, I think they're back if they win this game. And I've been fucking around with the playoff machine on ESPN all week long. It's the best piece of technology that's ever been invented. And, yeah, if they win this game, they are in the playoffs as of right now.

Wow.

Which is crazy. Crazy to think that about the Broncos.

So I just looked at the schedule, that turnaround on their defense. It's been very good. I mean, Josh Allen, they played Josh Allen, they played Patrick Mahomes. He did have the flu a couple of games. They played DTR and smushed them, and they played Easton Stick and smushed, so. But that's why I think the Broncos are a great story. I just think this is where the Lions get right.

Yeah, I tend to agree with you. I think the Broncos defense, I don't think that it's all luck. I think that they've actually turned it around. Sean Payton.

Well, they got a year. Yeah.

Comeback. Coach of the year.

He might be, but they have to turn the ball over, which Jared's got to do better. He's had a couple rough games where he's been throwing picks. I feel like, though, they're going to run the ball a lot. Maybe some easy passes to Jameer Gibbs. Get him out in space. I'm going lions. All right. Nerd nugget.

Reminder about the baby bump. Russell Wilson.

Okay.

Having a baby. Okay. For the first time in NFL.

Why, though?

He was pregnant.

Why the budy.

Pregnant? Yeah. What?

Russell Wilson.

He played pregnant.

That's really impressive. That's like Serena winning. Whatever.

Maybe I'm on the Broncos now. They've turned around. All this time. He was in his, like, third trimester.

Pretty impressive.

Serena Williams won an Australia Open.

Ciara had a baby.

Yes.

Let's show respect to the mother.

What was that look for? Hank Hank Sierra.

She had a baby.

No.

Serena Williams.

Oh.

Wasn't that an unfair advantage?

Oh, yeah.

So that was one of the first examples of us being so wrong that we were actually right about a take when we said that her being pregnant was a competitive advantage, because when a woman's pregnant, they don't menstruate anymore. So they hang on to all that blood, keep all that blood for themselves. And then actually a study came out. There was, like a legitimate article that said that their red blood cell count increases when they're pregnant, making oxygen travel around more efficiently in the body. I don't know if that has anything to do with the period or not, but we were technically right about that.

Yeah, we were. We nailed it.

We know. Combo.

We nailed it. We nailed it. We're combo Kings.

Anyway, for the first time in NFL.

Double combo.

Yeah.

Two for one.

For the first time in NFL history, a team has had a rookie running back and a rookie tight end each produce 700 plus scrimmage yards in a single season. Running back Jamir Gibbs and tight end Sam Laporta.

Okay. All right. Sunday, Sunday, Sunday, Sunday. Bucks versus packers, which we were just saying was a very big swing game in the playoff picture. Bucks at.

Like, I like the Bucks in this game. I like the Bucks in this game. The packers are missing AJ Dillon. He broke his.

Aaron Jones might be back.

He could be back.

Yeah, he could be back.

AJ, Dylan's been pretty good and he has a pretty much broken thumb. LaFleur won't confirm or deny how broken his thumb is, meaning it's probably broken.

Okay.

That's why I took from that. And Christian Watson, is he going to play?

I don't. I. So here's my case for the packers. The Bucs defense is pretty banged up. They've had a ton of injuries. I think some guys are coming back, but they've had a ton of injuries. And I think that there's something that LaFleur can do in the middle of the field because they've had a bunch of linebacker injuries. I also think that the Weakness of the Green Bay defense is the run defense, and the Bucks aren't the best running game. And then here's the big one for me. I went back and I looked and I was like, let me just look at what the Bucks have been doing this season because they started out hot and then they've cooled off. So they have three wins outside of the NFC south. Three wins outside of the NFC south. Week one against the Vikings, who, remember, started what, Owen? Three and four week two against the Bears. That's September bears, one of the worst teams ever. And week nine against the Titans, not exactly the best teams.

No.

So I don't know.

So this is going to tell us what Green Bay is, right.

It will tell us what Green Bay is. And my guess is that Green Bay is better than the week one Vikings, the week two Bears and the Titans.

Well, their defense stinks. Yeah, they carved them.

Need to put they if the packers are going to play well because they had that two game stretch or they were playing well for a while, but the Lions chiefs stretch. Yeah, I think that's right. Was it Lions Chiefs back to back? Their defensive line was playing really well. Like the guys in the middle, Kenny Clark, who I think packers fans don't like because he's the classic, all hype and then pay him a lot of money and then he'll have a couple of really good games. Then no, show a bunch of games. But that's going to be the key is like their defensive line has to get after Baker Mayfield because you saw it on Monday night, Tommy DeVito, they weren't doing anything.

He had no sacks. He had 80% completion percentage and I think he ran for 75 yards.

Right.

He might have been the first quarterback to ever do that as a rookie who's undrafted. So I think the defense is sus, to me, very sus LaFleur against Bulls is another thing I'm thinking of. I think LaFleur is a much better coach.

I would agree.

Much, much better coach.

But I still could really do anything against Bulls.

I think I like Tampa Bay in this game. The battle of the bays.

Yeah.

This is the classic. Mike Sherman, Warren Sapp put a jersey on.

Yeah.

When Warren Sapp blindsided Chad Clifton and broke his leg and then afterwards Mike Sherman was like, that was bullshit. Warren Sapp just stood in the middle of field like, put a jersey on all time comeback.

It's also the Matt LaFleur field goal game. I might get some PTSD on that.

And just let's keep it to football numbers, Matt.

Yeah.

Let's go sevens and threes.

Please do.

The whole time. Let's never get to eight.

I had a thought about this, about this whole division with the NFC south. Obviously, I think we still agree that every coach that does not win the division will probably be fired.

Correct.

Next year. Baker Mayfield. Has Baker Mayfield played good enough this year to earn himself a spot as a starter moving forward?

Yes.

I think he might be back. I think there's not enough talk about Baker Mayfield. Being comeback player of the year.

Yes.

That's not happening.

Yes.

You think it's.

Well, yeah, tomorrow. Remember he got in for that one. Special teams play.

Yeah, but it's got to be tua.

Russell Wilson. Tua. Demar fingers.

Yeah, it's harder to.

Could. I guess it happened in the.

Yeah, I mean, that's. That's legit. Yeah, it could be. But with a player like Russell Wilson, you're just giving him comeback player of the year because he sucked last year.

Wait, we're wrong about all this. Did you guys see Aaron Rodgers practice today?

Yeah.

That's basically a game.

Yeah, I agree. No, actually, we should give it to him. I've got a juicy little future on him.

And barstool sports tweeted, Aaron Rodgers is not even human.

Okay.

I'd actually say missing the entire season because you got injured is the most human thing ever.

Well, was he.

He's. He's literally showing that he's human.

Was he.

The fact that he hasn't been playing.

Was he actually injured to begin with?

Yeah, it's a good question.

Okay.

Nerd nugget for Bucks.

Packers, via Greg Alman, Buccaneers quarterback Baker May.

We're giving out credit now?

Well, sometimes I get them from the notes. Sometimes I get them from actual people.

Oh, okay.

Yeah.

Buccaneers quarterback Baker Mayfield has played at Lambeau Field in each of the last two years, also both in December with the Browns on Christmas day. In 2021, he lost, throwing four interceptions. And with the Rams last year, he lost and was sacked five times.

Yeah, unlike Lambo. So that was Greg Allman's nerd nugget of the week.

That might be my nerd nugget of the week this week.

Well, it's Greg almonds because he only has one.

He covers the it.

Well, how do you spell his last name? Is it Greg Alman Aumau? Okay.

That'S actually bird nugget of the week.

Does he have a tootsie pop in his hand?

No.

Okay, that was probably dated me really bad.

No, I get it. How many licks that thing?

I'm only one day older than you.

Yeah, you are fucking old.

I don't know what Tootsie pop is.

No, I know the commercial. The owl one two.

You know what a good joke would be if you said Greg Owlman, and then we said, who? Yeah, say Owlman who? That'd be a good joke.

Follow that away for loopy episode. Loopy episode, folks. Hank, you writing this shit down? That was a bit that you could use.

Yeah, dude.

Hey, guys, we got any Al men out there? Dude, I was rock. What if you did an hour of just straight up, like, anyone here from Detroit, anyone here from Sacramento, and just did every city in America? That's actually not a bad idea. All right, no one from Sacramento cut this. Let's try San Jose.

We'll cut this.

Albuquerque in the house. All right, next game. Bears at Browns. I've dubbed this gateway game, which makes me very nervous, because I think I'm four in my life in gateway games. And when I say gateway game, it's not only a gateway game for the Bears in what the rest of the. Because if they win this game, they have the Cardinals and the Falcons at home, and you could start thinking, oh, they're getting spicy. It's also a gateway game for my happiness. I am very excited for this game. If the Bears win this game, I will be a very happy boy. It is a gateway game. And again, my record in Gateway games. Oh, for lifetime.

Yeah. I don't know. I kind of like the Bears this weekend. I really do. There's another guy that got banged up.

On the Browns defense, so this week they lost Grant Delpit, who is their leading tackler, and then Aranquo, who's their second in sack.

Yoronquo is great. There was actually a great quote from Jim Schwartz about the injury that he had because he had a pectoral tear, and he played through it on one arm, and Jim Schwartz said, I went back and watched the film and almost threw up.

Oh, wow.

He almost puked.

That would have made him football pussy of the week if Jim Schwartz had puked.

Make your coach puke.

Yeah.

That's actually a badass move, though, to make your coach puke.

And then Denzel Ward's been out for a few weeks now, and it feels like he's playing the game of. Is he back? Is he not every week?

Yeah, I like the Bears this weekend. I know it sounds crazy to say. The Browns have looked okay the last couple of weeks. Flacco just got that contract.

He got paid.

He gets paid for every win. He gets a $75,000 bonus per win, and then the playoffs, I think it goes to, like, 100,000, 250,000, 500,000, and then I think it's $2 million if you want.

They should have made that a billion.

Yeah.

Like, Jimmy Haslam should have been. Like, you now own. What is a pilot?

A flying J.

Flying J. You own flying j. If the Browns win the Super bowl, that would be a great. That would have been a great incentive.

Also a great nickname for Joe Flacco.

Yeah.

Flying j. Yeah. Okay. I'm nervous about this game because I have flashbacks. We all watched, I think we watched this game together. We were in, it might not have been everyone here. We were in Aurora for a deal with Penn, where we did a watch party. And remember we did a promo. It was 1985. Last time the Bears won the Super Bowl. I don't know if anyone knows. That year we did a promo that if you bet one dollars on the Bears against the Browns, you would get $1,985. And it was a promo that was like, I remember it was one of the first big promos to do with Penn. And they're like, if so many people have bet this, that if the Bears cover, we might all be out of jobs. It was the game that Justin Fields, I think, got sacked seven times. It was his first start and they scored six points and he looked absolutely miserable. He was six for 20 for 68 yards. So, yeah, the Bears had 47 total yards in that game. So, yeah, I'm a little nervous about this game. I have that flying in my head, like, the last time I saw the Bears on this field.

It was the worst game I've ever watched.

You do have full permission, though, to just be like, Bears are back. If they win this, oh, if they get to six and eight, if the.

Bears win this game, they don't control their destiny. But the fact that they play the Falcons and Cardinals at home and then the packers, week 18, they could be in a similar spot to what the Lions were last year.

I want you to do a visualization technique with me here. Imagine it's the last week of the season. Justin Fields beats the packers. You get into the playoffs, then you get smoked. First round of the playoffs by the, oh, yeah, think about that.

The Eagles can't run the ball.

In the Bears, you get smoked.

No chance you can run the ball.

And then Max gets the biggest revenge of his entire career on you.

It wouldn't. So if that happens, I don't actually think it would be the biggest revenge because, one, the Eagles would still have to win three more games to win the Super bowl. And two, if that happens, I will be playing with so much house money at that point that Max will be in a spot where if he loses, his life is over.

It'll be terrifying.

It's not a win.

Yeah, there's no win for me.

And if he wins, it's like, well, dude, it was the Bears. They were fucking four and eight a month ago. So I will sign up for that.

I would not sign up for that.

Yeah, that would be 100% pressure on max. Like maybe 1% pressure on me, but there would be zero pressure. Zero. It's house money if they ran that game and you would be like, all right, we made it to the playoffs and we beat the packers.

And if you fucking beat me, that.

Would actually be a moment where I wouldn't come into work.

But if you don't, you wouldn't be able to.

But yeah, also, right, I would not be able to aftermath to that game. We'd already be at work if you made the playoffs. If you lose in the playoffs, you probably keep Justin Fields next year.

I still think it's on the table that, listen, we had a debate yesterday on the old xvideos.com. The financials still make sense to start with a rookie and build a defense. And so what about this?

What about keeping Justin Fields around next year as a backup?

I don't think that makes much sense.

You don't think so?

He's still cheap.

No, I don't think so. Because I think you have to decide on his fifth year options. Like this spring, you would have to.

Decide, yeah, this year. So you decline the fifth year option, you keep him as a backup, and then maybe his value grows in the year where he doesn't play.

Either way, this is a gateway game. I'm very nervous. Yeah. It's the first Bears game since week one against the packers this year, where my hopes are as high as they could be and the potential for disaster are as even higher.

Yeah, I'd be concerned about Flacco getting beaten up by the Bears defense.

Well, we'll see. I don't want to hurt him.

No, you can't hurt Flacco.

True.

You can't hurt him. Nerd.

Nugget.

The Bears are a juggernaut on the ground when it comes to big runs. Chicago has 57 rushes of ten plus yards this season, which leads the NFL.

Oh, all right.

I also think there's going to be a big DJ Moore and Justin Fields with his legs. Man coverage. Browns are heavy man coverage. DJ Moore is a beast. Man coverage. So if you're looking for something, that's my thoughts. Okay, next game, a game that no one should bet, but it's happening because no one knows what's going to happen with all these injuries. Texans, the Titans. Is CJ Stroud going to play? Probably not.

I mean, we should have learned from our mistake with the Texans last time as a group. My guess is that he's not going to play because he did not practice.

Today, so it could be case Keenum. Yeah, it's Davis Mills or Case Keenum.

Can't believe Case Keenum's still around.

Yep.

Nico Collins. Probably out, I would assume.

I think so.

Officially out? Yes.

Are you sure? Yes. Okay.

Metchi playing.

This is one of those games where I would love, love to take the Texans because you have the Titans coming off a big Monday night win, the Texans coming off a horrific game against the jets. It's a clear, like, hey, just swap them. But without CJ Stroud. And the Titans are wearing the Oilers uniforms.

The thing is, they're wearing the throwbacks. We said at the start of the year, the winner of this game should get to wear the.

Taylor wan actually tweeted that?

Oh, he did?

Yeah, yesterday.

He tweeted that before me yesterday?

Yes.

Damn it. Did he really?

It's a good take.

Good take, Taylor.

Yeah, you did it.

Was that on the bus?

No, he tweeted it. Okay. Yeah, he tweeted it.

It's a good take. I mean, sometimes you got to take your hat off.

And he also, though, I felt bad for him because Titans fans jumped down his throat because they're like, fuck that. We know that they're not actually going to play for a jersey. We're just speaking in hypothetical. I back up Taylor in that respect.

We're speaking as fans, and we understand what happened with the franchise moving, and the franchise that moves gets to keep all intellectual property, and the Texans spring up as an expansion team. I'm just saying, there's nothing in Tennessee about oil. No, that's Houston. And also, you had so many iconic players that played in those uniforms in Houston, it feels like it should be a Houston.

The Texans should just fight fire with fire. And when they come to Tennessee and they wear these oiler uniforms, they should just wear, like, a guitar on their helmet.

Taylor Swift.

Yeah.

Bluegrass. We're the Houston Bluegrass.

Yeah.

The country boys from Texas.

Okay. Nerd Nugget.

Titans running back Derrick Henry has scored two touchdowns in each of the last three games and can set the franchise record by recording his fourth consecutive game with at least two rushing touchdowns. He'd become the 8th NFL player since the 1970 merger to accomplish that.

Wow.

Tractor Cito. Season.

Season. All right, next up, jets at Dolphins. Dolphins offensive line is a mess.

Could this be a get right game for the Dolphins?

I don't think so.

Their offensive line is banged up. I think they're down three starters, right?

Yeah.

And the jets four. Maybe the jets defense is good, very good. And I think they might be looking at this game. So if you're the jets and you've had a bad season, you've lost a lot of really shitty games where your offense couldn't do shit. We've talked about how the defense at some point has to be like, I'm tired of this shit. I'm sick of this shit. I'm tired of the shit. When you play against a good team that's got all the accolades and a team that people are talking about as being possibly Super bowl contenders, I feel like that's a good natural shot in the arm for the jets defense to go out there and have something to prove.

Also, I think the jets defense got a little bounce back in their step last week when Zach Wilson showed to be competent.

Yeah, he's really good.

They, you get at least, maybe the play is actually jets first half because they're going off of what Zach Wilson looked like in the second half last week. So they're like, oh, he's going to be good. It might take a half for them to be like, no, he's still Zach Wilson.

Zach Wilson again.

Yeah, that might be the play.

I like the Dolphins in this situation. I feel like Zach Wilson coming back to earth. That's a safe bet.

Yeah.

Historically, a very safe bet.

Memes. Jets win this. Rogers, if jets win this, we're all the way back.

I've created a path to the playoff for the jets.

Okay. The worst part about me asking memes this is that I'm laughing at them. But it's no different than when I talk about the Bears. We're both five and eight. Yeah, but the NFC is more what?

Max, every team in the AFC is seven and six. No team in the NFC is seven and six.

Oh, yeah.

They're what, all six and seven?

Six and seven?

Yeah, you're memes is.

There's a 0.5% chance that the jets.

Make the playoffs and memes is acting.

Like it's 50 50.

Okay, so you're right. Thank you, Max. I'm crazy. Yeah, but there's a lot of six and seven teams. I'm crazy, but I'm not as crazy as memes. Thank you, Max memes. Give us the path. So if one of the, does any team have to get hit, have a plane crash? No, I literally said that this.

Would.

Be great if he went through all the iterations and he's like, and the Chiefs have to all get kidnapped if.

The Buffalo Bills flight runs into a building.

Yeah.

So the third playoff spot needs to finish. Have seven wins by the end of this week.

So the jets have to beat the Dolphins.

Okay.

The winner of Steelers Colts will be eight wins.

So hoping the Colts win that one. Lions beat the Broncos.

Vikings have to beat the Bengals.

Bears have to beat the Browns. Wait, are we doing this for every week?

Yeah.

Well, no, just week 15.

Okay.

All right, play what's in front of you.

Yeah.

Titans beat the Texans. Cowboys beat the Bills.

All right, send me that because I'll put it in as a parlay for you.

Okay.

And then teams most likely to fuck up this path are the Bengals and the jets. I'm looking at that graph that I talked about.

You really kind of buried the lead there.

When it comes to the graph on how your playoff percentages increase or decrease based on this game, it looks like with a win, the jets playoff percentage increases by this. Looks like 1%.

Oh, yeah.

So you're taking baby steps. Actually, memes, you know what you should do? Just say, like, if the jets make the playoffs and Aaron Rogers starts, you'll do ayahuasca in.

Okay, it is funny. I just looked up the standings and the jets are in 14th place out of 16 teams.

Best team in the NFC.

It's spoiler season and could be backseason. Oh, man. Okay, next game up. Oh, nerd nugget.

This is the first time in Dolphins history that Miami has recorded a pick six in three consecutive games. If they can do it again on Sunday against the jets, they joined the $2,002 as the only teams in the NFL since 2000 to have a pick six in four straight games.

Wow. Okay.

All right, next game. Chiefs at Patriots. Belichick.

Yeah, Belichick News. So as a Patriots news or reports?

Well, you reported on Wednesday's show. People heard that.

I reported on the report.

Did you get a lot of tweets about that? I don't know. Okay.

As a Patriots fan on this podcast, I'm just going to say that that seems like fake news to me. Seems like a fake news media report from Tom Curran. The media has been out to get us since 2000. It feels like at the start, why did you do the report on at the start?

Oh, yeah, we should have PFT do the report at the start.

It was okay going back to the beginning, it was like, oh, you're videotaping your opponent's practices illegally and then using that material to game plan for them. The fake news media was wrong about that. Then there was, they were right about, no, they hate us because they ain't us. No, hank, you're doing fanfiction.

Listen to them.

They weren't right about that, okay? Belichick didn't do anything wrong. I can't believe that you're going against my patriots like this. So they were wrong about that. Then after that, there was the tuck rule. Right, the tuck rule. Everybody knows that was bullshit. That was a great call by the refs after that benefited the Patriots. No, I'm just saying. But then people complained about the tuck rule and said, oh, the Patriots are cheating again. I'm just saying, like, the news media has been against us for so long. Like, what you're saying right now. Everybody hated the Patriots after that call. They thought that it was bullshit. It wasn't. It was a good rule.

Was it after that call or after they won the second and then third Super bowl?

Okay, well, then, yeah, that went right along with the whole videotaping practices thing. That was hand in hand. Then there was Aaron Hernandez killing a bunch of people, and people were like, oh, the Patriots are back. Organization for that. Then there was Julian Edelman getting his drink spiked by something, and everyone came at us and said, oh, the Patriots are running real loose ship around here. Okay, what's going on with that? Then there was messing with the injury report and, like, Brandon spikes and being like, oh, you guys are cheating that way. And then after that, it was, oh, you're fucking with the in game communications between Mike Tomlin and his players on the field, on the sideline. That was also fake. That was fake news. Then there was deflate gate. Oh, Tom Brady's cheating by deflating all these balls. Then there was Robert Kraft getting sucked off at the day spa. No, jerked off, allegedly. Okay, there was mouth contact. It might have just been a tongue, but then that was a bunch of bullshit too. They were just coming at us for that. Then there was the fake lighthouse thing that everybody got upset about.

I don't care.

Now you forgot one. Then Belichick had that booty call at that girl's house.

Oh, yeah, Belichick. Shirtless walk of shame slut shaming our head coach, Bill Belichick. And then, now this is just another brick in the wall, and we're brick by brick. We're defending the wall. This is our Patriots. They hate us because they ain't us. And this is just a normal report that I would expect from the fake news media.

Hank, as a Cowboys fan, what are your thoughts?

Yeah, I mean, some of those things I thought were facts. Some of them, I agree that they're rumors and speculation and nonsense. Scuttlebutt.

What about the mouth versus hand situation with Kraft?

He's probably doing it all.

Okay.

Yeah, that's our guy.

That's what Jerry would do.

That's our guy.

That's Robert Kraft. Mr. Positions.

That's what Jerry would do. That's just a sign of a great owner.

Yeah, that's true.

Your guy Jerry, he definitely would. No, Jerry would go anal.

Yeah, for sure.

He goes anal.

He wouldn't get the massage.

But yeah.

The report that came out on Tuesday night was that patriots expected to move on from Belichick. That had been reported or had been discussed after the Germany game. We all remember that one where Mac Jones threw like the worst interception of all time and, yeah, Mr. Kraft was embarrassed. Belichick said, okay, well, then, then we're done here.

Do you believe it?

No. As a Patriots fan, there's no chance. Zero, 0% chance. I don't think Belichick would leave. I think the Patriots might win this game. Spoiler, spoiler, spoiler for the Chiefs. And then, oh, it'd be kind of crazy, too, because then, well, remember when.

The Patriots beat the Chiefs opening night and they called, no, the Chiefs beat the Patriots, but they called him out of balance when he wasn't.

Oh, I thought you're talking about the time. When was it? Trent Dilfer was like, it's over.

Yeah, that was Goodell night, Nikhil, Harry.

That was Monday night game, Nikhil, Harry.

Was recently, I believe that was the night everyone had the towels.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

That was when Dave cried and Fedelberg was like, enjoy your heirlooms or.

Yeah, yeah, that's right. PFD knows all is like.

I've lived in and breathe same, they run the same playbook against the Patriots every year. Oh, here's another story just to make us look bad. And then guess what we do? We respond. We win Super Bowls.

I don't think they're going to win this.

Oh, you're a hater.

I agree. I think the Chiefs are going to win. I think the Chiefs are going to get right.

The NFL needs the Chiefs to win.

Oh.

And so I think that's going to play a factor, as it usually does when these two teams match up. Sometimes the Patriots overcome, sometimes they have no choice but not to. But I think if it's close, Chiefs are winning this, they might lose by 30.

I think the Chiefs are going to win this game because that Patriots Steelers game, like Bailey Zappi, was incredible for two quarters, and then they went right back to the Patriots offense, not good.

They just built up a big enough right.

So.

Okay.

But we forget that we're like, Bailey.

Zappi played good last, right? So. And I think this is like, everyone in the know locker rooms, like, we have to win this game easily because this is time. It's time.

How sick would it be if Travis Kelsey did the lateral again this week?

That would be sick.

It'd be great. Get that ball to Canton. Yeah, that's a highlight.

Kadarius Tony would probably be offsides again.

Kaderius Tony, where's he going to line up?

Is he going to line up in the backfield every game, every day?

Yeah.

They should tell him. Do not. You're never on the line of scrimmage.

He might line up in Kansas City because they won't bring him on the plane.

That to be a smart move.

Yes. So you think the Patriots are going to lose?

Yeah, they'll lose close.

Oh.

So hungry dog.

Hungry dog's for winners.

Oh, okay. So have you won it a lot?

Yeah, historically.

All right, juju revenge game, too.

Yeah.

Juju revenge game.

Back to back.

Still waiting for his knee to explode.

Yeah.

At any second.

Should get that knee exploded.

It's a revenge.

Yeah.

Yeah, it is.

Okay. Nerd Nugget.

I actually have a theory to Hank's point. I think.

Nerd theory. Nerd theory.

Okay.

Theory.

Stephen Hawking.

I think if the NFL wanted anything, they should want the Chiefs not to get to buy because that's one extra game of ratings for the swifties in super wild card weekend.

Good point.

Good point.

Well, that would explain why they didn't ask Al Michaels to do that game. Because when on Thursday night football, you remember Al Michaels was against Taylor Swift. He was like, listen, we're going to show her, but we're not going to make her the main story because she's not the main story. Football is the main story.

I thought it was because Al Michaels and Taylor Swift can never be in the same building. Otherwise they'd fuck.

The attraction is too high.

Yeah.

I don't want to say how, but they would.

They would. They would. But, yeah, Al Michaels. There's a theory out there that Al Michaels was asked to step aside because he wasn't playing ball with them, asking to put Taylor Swift on the broadcast.

I'm not aware of that.

Okay.

Yeah, well, that's theory. We're going theory for fair theory.

Trade Chiefs wide receiver Rashee Rice has six receiving touchdowns this season. With one more, he can break the tie with four other former Chiefs for most touchdown receptions in a player's rookie season.

Rice has got to be the best receiver. Last.

Did they, did that nerd nugget come directly from the Chiefs wide receiver locker room?

It was from Chiefs game though.

Yeah.

I mean, their wide receivers stink.

They're pretty bad.

Well, here's the one, one whose wide.

Receivers are worse in this game. The Chiefs or the Patriots? Both pretty bad.

Is Devontae Parker on the Patriots still? Is he playing?

Yeah, I think he caught some.

I forgot about him.

He's probably the best receiver on the right.

He's passed a few former Dolphins. They have Gasicki Devante.

Yeah. Henry.

Okay, tight end.

Next game, Giants and Saints.

Does it catch the ball? You don't know anything about our roster.

Giants and Saints.

Tommy.

I'm in on Tommy DeVito on this game.

You have no choice but to root for Tommy DeVito.

I was thinking about it too. PFD. I was looking back because I know that Panther Saints game was hard for you with every touchdown. Bet that was a 14 six game.

Yeah.

The Panthers outgained the Saints by 100 yards.

That's what was so frustrating, right? Because they had every chance to score a touchdown and they just wouldn't, right.

So then you look at the box score and you're like, oh, they beat the Panthers 28 six. They killed them. Saints are right. No, the Saints are not right. There's nothing right about the Saints right now. And you're going to lay six points. Tommy Devito, they're broken.

Broken.

I, you have to, you can't root.

Against the Tommy DeVito moment that's happening right now. The only way, if you're a Saints fan, and I honestly think that a lot of Saints fans would rather them not win these games because it delays an inevitable explosion of the team. But if you're anybody but besides a Saints fan, you have no excuse to be rooting for the Saints this weekend. Extend the Tommy DeVito story. It's fun. Let us have this fun little blip.

The only people who can root against Tommy DeVito are Saints fans. And then if you are late to the Tommy DeVito party, because I was talking to Dave, he had the packers on Monday Night Football and he was like, I want to take the giants here, but I'm late to the party because you can't switch. If the train starts going, if the narrative train starts going and you missed the first two stops, you jump on that, that train crashes off the bridge.

Yeah.

This would be a bad game to introduce somebody to Tommy, right?

You don't want to do.

There's a great chance that it does derail and things go haywire. But keep enjoying. Like, let us enjoy our Tommy DeVito moment. I want this to extend.

If you can't handle your Tommy DeVito at what was it, like 17 yards or. No, it was like minus negative.

Yeah.

And you don't deserve him on this three game winning streak.

No.

And he might be good.

He might be good. You know what he's going next week?

What?

He's got a permit.

To what?

Eagle hunting.

Oh, shit.

Yeah.

Do we know any italian Eagles fans.

That would be really upset with that be torn? You should do a split jersey next week. No shot eagles in the italian flag in the slightest.

Yeah.

Sirianni Siriani rocks an italian flag and Dom every day. And Dom. We'll get to Dom in a minute. Yeah. I'm all giants here. Probably a mistake, but once you're on the train, you don't get off just watching.

I'm a prisoner of the moment. So on one hand I'm rooting for Tommy DeVito. On the other, I'm full in on the Saints offensive lineman. Don't like Derek Carr.

Yes, I agree with that. And we will talk more about that with Jeff Saturday because he had some good insight. We asked him a specific question about that.

Okay.

Last early games, falcons at Panthers. Oh, boy, oh, boy. PFD I don't know how you can bet Desmond Ritter as a favorite on the road, but I also don't know how you can bet the Panthers. Couple things, couple little facts from this game. One, that really cool camera that they have at the Benz dome where they tracked the ball, they released a highlight of Desmond Ritter throwing a pass to Drake London. It was like the worst pass ever.

So our colleague big t had a very good observation from that. Even Desmond Ritter's highlight throws look like they're being intercepted by his own wide receiver.

That was exactly what happened. He threw it to a cornerback and Drake London dove in front of him at the last second to catch it.

Made a great play on the was.

It was crazy.

It is a great camera, though.

It is a great camera. Other fact about this game, if you would like to go to this game, use the game time app. But guess what? Ticket get in price $7.45.

What? That's like 1950.

You get a free shoe shine with that $0.45. That's crazy.

That's not real.

Tepper got tepper pissed off about that $0.45.

If I was David Tepper, I would buy every ticket for this game, just so you didn't have the embarrassment.

Forty five cents of the.

Forty five cents.

Yeah.

Oh, man, that's tough.

That's tough. I chirp, chirp to chirp. Bird nugget of the week.

Let's go.

Love it.

For the falcons.

For the falcons. Bird fact. Did you know that you can tell which way the wind is blowing by how birds are standing?

Well, that makes sense, right?

Birds always stand facing into the wind. Oh, they like the adversity.

Yeah.

They don't want to get blown away, too. If the wind kind of gusts, then.

They just take off and they're all.

Of a sudden flying birds.

You can tell if you're ever stranded in nature and you see a bird facing east, then you can be like, actually, that wouldn't really work. You just know which way the wind's blowing.

Yeah.

Because a bird, if you're on a.

Golf course and there's a bunch of asshole canadian geese next to you.

Yeah.

Those aren't birds.

Which way is this blowing the golf ball in this shot? You're like, well, the birds are facing that way. That's where the wind's coming from.

That would make sense, though, because if they had their ass to the wind, it'd be like a car in neutral. You just roll away at any moment.

Yeah.

It's like dogs when they're in a car, dogs will always put their face in the wind, too. They won't look backwards.

Yeah.

Birds like the adversity.

That's a like. Betting Desmond Ritter minus three on the road is a very scary proposition. But I don't know how you could bet the Panthers at this point. And I've tried. I've tried to bet the Panthers a few times in the last few weeks.

I think I might double down on my start. Andy Reid take or Andy Dalton take for the Panthers.

I don't like it because I've talked.

To some Panthers fans. They don't hate the idea. A lot of them actually like the idea because I think that you're doing more harm than good to want.

They don't want to give up the first pick.

Yeah.

Want to win a couple of games and not give up the first pick. So I like Bryce Young. You got to let the kid learn.

Yeah.

I think if you're a Panthers fan, you want to save everything that Bryce Young's doing. You want the real coaches to come in. You don't want him to learn anything else that he's going to have to unlearn this offseason. You don't want his confidence to get killed any more than it already is. You don't want him to get hurt, God forbid. So just put Andy Dalton in.

Yeah.

No, I need Bryce Young to keep losing. I like that he's losing. Okay, take a quick break. Oh, bird nugget. Yeah, no nerd nugget.

I'm going to reverse course quickly and.

Let you know that Giants have 14 takeaways in the last five weeks, including a week 13 by.

Wait.

Oh, I missed the last one.

Yeah, I didn't want to interrupt.

Okay.

Thank you, Jake. Very cool.

Their 14 takeaways in the last four games are the highest in a four game span since 2012. So the Giants defense.

That's actually good.

Yeah.

All right. I like that. That's a good one.

The Panthers are wearing black helmets for the first time this season.

Oh, I didn't know that. Yeah, that changes my calculus.

Well, the last time they wore them, it was at home against the Falcons as well. They won 25 to 15.

Black Helmet game.

Yeah.

Okay, I think I might take the.

Panthers pulling out all the stops.

Their offense can't be as bad as it was last week, right? That's, like, impossible.

No, it's been really bad for a long time. Oh, it was so bad. Yeah, it's been really bad for a long time. All right, before we get to the afternoon games in the Sunday night game, quick word from our friends. Apple takeover. The family plan now streaming on Apple TV plus. Starring Mark Wahlberg as Dan Morgan, who has many things, a devoted husband, a loving father, a celebrated car salesman. He's also a former assassin. And when his past catches up to his present, he takes his unsuspecting family on a road trip unlike any other. There's a must watch. Put a must watch tag on this. You have to have Apple TV. Apple TV has everything. I love Apple TV. So the family plan now streaming on Apple TV plus. Again, Mark Wahlberg's in it. Recurring guest, good friend of the show. The family plan now streaming on Apple TV. Go. Go watch it right now and tell us how good it is, because we know how good it is. We watched it. We love it. The family plan now streaming on Apple TV Plus. Mark Wahlberg. We'll get him back on the show.

Gonna be a good holiday watch. I'll give you a bonus watch on Apple TV. I really like Blackbird. Blackbird was good.

Yes, I have to watch it.

If you like movies or tv shows about prison and about murderers and people snitching on each other, and it's a true story, too.

Yeah.

I have to catch up on all my watching my tv movie watching.

Very good on Apple TV.

I got to watch all of it.

Oh, yes.

Rocks.

Go watch the family plan now streaming on Apple TV plus. This is a perfect time of year to sit down on the couch on a Friday night. It's cold out. Family plan now streaming on Apple TV plus. Okay, afternoon games. 49 ers at Cardinals. The sneak them in. 405 305 start. I'm going to do something dangerous.

Pft.

I think I'm going to bet on the Cardinals.

Take the birds. I think this game is going to be over by the time the real afternoon games start. That's what I think. The late starts.

Okay.

The only reason I'm going to take the Cardinals is they're coming off a buy. And I know that look aheads don't really exist in the NFL, but if they did, the Niners are looking ahead to a huge game against the Ravens, Monday night football that will decide both conferences, one seeds most likely.

Yeah.

I don't know if the Niners can look ahead, though, because they had those three losses in a row. I know they're fighting for the one seed.

Right. They're going to win. I'm saying, could this be that weird game? The fact that it starts 305, 405, that weird game that you don't really pay attention to and you're like, oh, wow, the 49 ers are only out three in the fourth quarter. Just saying.

Maybe the Cardinals defense is tough.

I said it learned that I was going to do something dumb.

Yeah, it might be dumb, but I guess in conferences you don't know what's going to happen between the two teams. They know each other.

Yeah, they know play each other a lot.

Well.

Really well. I still like the Niners. I think the Niner are on. They've got a mission.

Okay. Yeah. Okay.

All right.

Are you getting high?

This is a c four.

Okay.

I love that.

Yeah, you are. You're getting high on nootropics life.

Okay. Jake nerd nugget.

Since 2019, 53% of the 49 ers receiving yards have come after the catch. This yak percentage ranks first in the NFL during that span.

That's the debo stat.

That's your song, right?

Yes.

That was good.

Yeah.

We'll have to get a new song now.

So hot.

It's hot in here. It's very hot. Okay, next game, commanders at Rams. I have a question for PFT that will decide who I'm going to bet on here.

Okay. PFt.

We've known each other for a long time. We're good friends. We have a great working relationship. Did you dye your right? I just wanted the honesty. Hank turned to me last night. He's like, I think PFD died mustache.

I got to make this bad boy pop. Got to make it pop.

I'm happy you're honest. Okay. We were thinking about it, and we didn't want to know I was watching.

So we were doing the surviving Barcelona finale show last night, and I was stationed behind PFD diagonally, and I wasn't really involved in any of the conversation. So I was just looking around, and I just got fixated on your mustache, and I looked it up. I'm happy you admitted it, because I pulled up the receipts from a picture.

Of you last night.

And then the YouTube episode from Monday's show.

This is the most dyed mustache of all time. Let's not act like this is the first time.

No, I know.

I was looking his mustache.

He's done this before.

He's going for a different look right now. Listen, it's about to be the holidays. Going to see family over the holidays. I can't go back looking like a mix between Joe Dirt and Mario. So it's just like right now, Mario, I look like.

Keep going.

Tom Selleck. A mix between Tom Selleck and Joe dirt. Many people are saying the mustache looks great. I would agree with them. No one's talking about the sideburns. I did not die. The sideburns are bad.

We were just. Hang on, hang on. Patch.

All right.

I lost a bet. You're doing this by choice.

So here's my thing, right? The sides of the mustache kind of grow in blonde sometimes. So if I grow the whole operation out, it looks like I'm doing a little h man action with my facial hair.

This looks like a confederate revolutionary war soldier. You're going to write a letter to Andrew Luck.

Many great people on both sides.

Yeah.

Listen, okay. The mustache might not be the best look in the world, but just something I'm trying out.

I think it looks fine. Hank and I was weighing on Hank and I because we were like, did he die?

Oh, yeah.

I also just said, confederate revolutionary war. I want to address that.

Civil war.

Million percent died. 100 million%.

We're not expecting any real facts.

Yeah.

Oh, Max messed up a history fact. This whole credibility of the podcast show.

You to stand for something for this game. I think the Rams are going to win.

Yeah, they're going to win. I think there's going to be a lot of points scored which is nice. The defense on the commander side can't really do anything. I'm just looking for good stuff out of Sam Howe.

Yeah.

Continue to be the guy.

You're in the good stuff time. Like, just give me some stuff from the quarterback.

Yeah, give me some good stuff. No injuries from Sam Howe. I'm full in on tanking right now. I'm sure once the game starts, I want the commanders to win, but I do not want them to win right now. I've got pre nut clarity, and it would be bad if they won this football game.

Makes sense.

Yeah.

You want pre nut delusion that I.

Want them to lose this football game?

You don't get clarity pre nut.

I do.

I think my clearest right before I'm.

About to have sex, the best.

That's delusion.

No, it's literally no focus. You get tunnel vision on the kuchi.

Yeah.

Delusion.

A perfect scenario for you is that Sam Howe looks really good. And the 49 ers or, sorry, the, the commanders stay like, ten point deficit the whole time.

Yeah, that'd be great.

It's like, if you ever take the lead in the second half, then you're going to be like, we're winning.

It would be nice if they threw the ball to Terry McLaurin once.

Yeah.

Cardio after the last game where he's like, I'm basically just doing cardio out there, not catching any balls. But I've reached the point with this team where we lost Chase young, lost Montez sweat. The way that Josh Harris operates is it's probably going to be a clean rebuild where you just get everyone out and bring in entirely new. Turn the page entirely. It might be time to say bye to Jonathan Allen. I know he'sick of this shit. I know he's fucking tired of this shit. He's fucking tired of this motherfucking shit. That famous quote, he's a great player. He's a captain. Love him, wish him nothing but the best. Might be time to just be like, okay. Even our good players like Jonathan Allen, Terry McLaurin, we might just be starting over entirely next year. Yeah, just get everybody that's had a whiff. Anyone that's been in a room with Dan Snyder should not be on this team moving forward.

Yes.

That's kind of the position that I'm in right now. Because he will get his stink on you somehow.

Yeah, burn it all down.

Burn it all down. Restart next year. Turn the page. New coach. Maybe my patriots could send Belichick down there. I don't know what that would look.

Like it would be funny if the commanders petitioned the league to be guys, we're going to change our name again. Can you just make us an expansion?

Fuck, yeah. I'll take that.

Yeah.

I would even know. I don't want to say that in the heat of the moment. If we didn't have a season next year and then we came back entirely new, that would be good for the future of the organization.

Right.

But I do obviously want to see the Commanders play football on Sundays, and Josh Harris might turn around.

Yeah.

This is the team that he's focused on more than any other team that he owns.

That's a fact. That's a fact. Okay. Last afternoon game, the best game. Cowboys at Bills. Henry, your cowboys.

The crown jewel.

The crown jewel.

Can I be honest?

Yes.

Kind of want the Bills to win this game.

Why?

I like their story. I think they have a long road ahead of them. Dolphins fans are annoyingly cocky, and Bills fans, I feel more of a connection to. Obviously, we like Josh. We were kind of rivals, but we never really overlapped too much in the rivalry era. Like, the Patriots were really good, the Bills were bad.

Then.

The Bills got good when the Patriots were bad. And I like Bill's mafia. Dolphins fans are insufferable. They're super annoying. They're super cocky. They haven't won shit. And seeing.

Is that just because you work around Nicky smokes and Frank the tank?

No.

I mean, they've always, like, Nicky smokes is definitely a good representation of but. And I like Frank, but he's know, doom and gloom. Seeing him meltdown is very funny. Like, watching that game unfold and knowing he's going to have these clips of him freaking out is good. Seeing them blow a season and somehow lose the AFC east would be funny.

Yeah, Hank, you'd be smiling.

I would be smiling.

Hank Lockwood would be smiling. The Bills would be spinning.

The Bills story is.

Yeah.

I mean, it's, they've been through going even back to last season. It feels like everything that could go wrong for the Bills has gone wrong for them to maybe run the table. Josh Allen would maybe win MVP. I mean, if he ran the table, they won the AFC east, he would have a chance.

You don't want to play the Bills in the playoffs?

Yeah, I'm hoping they get to the playoffs. The Cowboys put Bills players on the tackling dummies this week, so I don't know what bowl game they're playing. It is a cheese it bowl or something, but that's a weird move.

On the robotic ones that move around.

Yeah. I don't know if it was robotic ones, but it was weird.

That's a strange move to do.

That's a really strange move to do for an NFL team.

That's McCarthy. Just, like, making it look like he's busy during the.

Also, the Cowboys road wins this year. Hank, you know this. You could actually. Why don't you tell us, Hank?

Eagles.

Nope.

You remember Dax stepped commanders.

Nope.

Nope. Giants. Yes.

Wow.

Die hard Cowboys.

All right.

I should have put you on the spot. The Cowboys road wins this year. You even beat the Giants on the road.

No.

You said yes. Commanders, no.

Yes.

Remember you guys played Trump on Thanksgiving?

Chargers, Giants, Panthers. Those teams stink.

Yeah.

Those are the three road wins.

We thought their win over the Chargers meant something.

Yeah. They are a completely different team away from home. I like the Bills.

What's the line in this game?

One and a half. Yeah, I like the Bills.

It's a good test. If we lose this game, it's like a good wake up call before the playoff run.

I also think the Bills remember when we had Orlovsky on. He's like, put Josh Allen under center. They're doing that more now.

Yeah.

James Cook is electric. I'm worried about the Bills defense in this game, but I think it's going to be kind of a shootout. So I like the Bills.

The line moved to two now.

Oh, that's probably because we talked about.

The tackling dummies right now.

Yeah, they're listening. They're listening. Okay, nerd nugget.

First up, Rams running back Kyron Williams needs ten more scrimmage yards to hit 1000 on the season. He'd be the first Rams running back since Tod Gurley in 2019 to reach that mark.

He's good.

Next up, nerd nugget of the week.

Sack attack. Oh, the Bills.

Have.

I made up that name? It wasn't in the note.

Yeah, man. Thanks, Jake.

The Bills.

For a second, I thought that was not your creation.

If you're listening to the podcast and not the YouTube, you'd be like, who just walked into the room and punched big cat in the stomach?

Yeah, maybe now I know why you accidentally skipped two nerd nuggets.

No, that wasn't why. The problem is in reality is that we are now no buyville. So there's 16 or 14 games. That's fair. It's a shitload of games.

Yeah. Sack attack. The Bills have allowed the least amount of sacks in the NFL with 18, tied with the Chiefs and are tied for third in the league in sacks themselves with 42.

Yeah, the Cowboys, not only the road thing that I was talking about, how they're very different on the road. The Cowboys defense, while very good, has also beaten up and eaten up really bad offensive line.

Yeah, they're very good against bad teams.

Didn't I have that statue? It was last week. 220 points, and 40 of them were against the Giants twice. Jets, Patriots, like all these terrible teams.

But they did beat the Eagles pretty convincingly.

Yeah, they did.

No, they looked awesome, but that was that.

The Cowboys Super bowl.

Are the Eagles good?

We don't know the Eagles good.

Max, do you want to give us any thoughts about the Monday night game or. No, sorry. Let's do Sunday night and then you give us some thoughts about the Monday night game, even though we don't usually do it. Ravens, Jaguars finishing us off loopy. I think I like the Ravens. I don't fucking know. This is a tough game.

It's weird with the prime time. So the Jaguars are going to have a lot to play for. They have the national stage. They're going to have a full house. People are pumped. This is almost a must win for the Jaguars.

Yes.

If they want to keep thinking that they're going to be like a factor in the playoffs. I think I like the Jaguars. Three and a half at home.

Really?

Yeah. Okay.

Three and a half at home. This is probably a field goal game either way.

Yeah, I don't know, because, like, the.

Ravens played an awesome game last week against the Rams, but they also very easily could have lost that game.

Easily could have lost.

And if they had happened to lose that game last week or tie, even if they don't return that punt for a touchdown, they get stuck around midfield, kick it back. Tie is in the realm of possibility at that point. If they had tied that game, we wouldn't be thinking about the Ravens going to this game as being like, world beaters.

That's true.

So I like the Jaguars at home.

Okay. Mac or nerd Nugget.

Ravens quarterback Lamar Jackson is the only quarterback in NFL history to produce six seasons of 600 plus rushing yards. He has 644 right now. No other quarterback has more than four such seasons.

Really fast.

Max, thoughts real quick.

I think we can talk about it Sunday. Okay, let's do it Sunday.

Well, no, just give me a.

Sounds like he's not ready.

Give me one thought. I have thoughts, but this is a.

Little teaser in the know.

Give me one thought.

You want to talk about it on Sunday?

Yeah.

That's your thought? His thought. Is he wants to talk about it.

I don't like how Max jumped down my throat about the mustache thing. That seemed perfect.

I think the mustache. We don't have to replay it. We know what you're going to say. It's the sideburn. I don't like the sideburn.

I've had sideburns for ten years, Hank.

And I came in very soft on that. Yeah, I was ready to talk about in the show.

Max came in with a camera.

I was like, what the fuck is on your.

Yeah.

And then Max just jumped over the top and was like, yeah, I think I look classy. I think that it needed that, though.

I think.

What setting would it be considered?

Classy.

Like Myrtle beach.

Super classy.

I look if you're at the slot machine. Classy as fuck.

Life is a slot machine for me. Every day, I wake up, and I hit the slot machine, and I've been on a fucking heater.

If you're in a bar in, like, Destin, Florida, you are classy.

Yeah, I'll take that.

Well, we have a big interview coming.

Up, and I was just looking at. I was like, what is this guy thinking when he's looking at your face right now?

What are you talking, man? Max. He's doubling down. That's mean. Max.

I think I look good. You know what? Haters everywhere.

Haters everywhere.

All around.

You're supposed to be hair brothers.

I think I look good. I think I look like the perfect example of an american male.

Do you dye the under the chin beard?

No, I don't dye that.

Match the color.

I think it would look good without.

The sideburns, and I truly mean that.

Sue, lay the fuck off my sideburns.

But I think the rest of it.

No.

Get off my boy's sideburns.

I realize I've had sideburns.

We'll fuck you up. No, but the way that you shaved it, it's, like, very purpose. Stop.

Yeah.

I was like, the lineup on the sideburns is. You know what I did last night when I was shaving? I was trying to have it so that the sideburns connected all the way to the mustache.

Right.

That'd be a good look. Literally, like, exactly like the Civil War. Like the Civil War, yeah. And I accidentally nicked part of this side of it and disconnected it. So I'm like, fuck. Now I just got to make it pointy on the sideburns. Keep the mustache as is. But, yeah, it would have looked so much cooler if the sideburns connected. Yeah, it was just like, very zen.

Yeah. Okay, let's do our picks.

You're a piece of shit, man.

Yeah. If you just keep asking questions, you can keep going harder. So, you know, lay your sword down. Picks who's picking first and what are the standings.

Memes, who's picking first?

I think Jake.

Okay.

I'm picking first. So in the warm up category, the opening act, I have 17 and a half. Memes has 15. Max has 15. Head to head heading into it. And right now, main event, 1 hour big cat, 19 and a half. Pft 18, Hank, twelve and a half. Hank is five and a half back with eight points remaining. So if my math is correct, if Pft outgains Hank this week, I believe it would be over because then you'd be six and a half up with six to who's.

Who's. Who's picking first.

I'm going to take the Dolphins minus nine and a half against the jets.

Okay.

I am going to take the Bears.

Plus three against the brains.

Okay.

Memes, ravens, jaguars, over 42 and a half. Piece of Sunday night.

Hank, quick announcement here.

What?

What's it called?

Announcement. I just thought of that.

I like that.

Oh, there you go. You got to get rid of that, Hank.

We're doing at Barcelona River north in Chicago on Wednesday, a talent show. We're going to have a bunch of people, five minutes, some comedians, some food people, some magicians, whatever you want to do. We'll put out the link for the submission form, send it in today or tomorrow. We're going to pick them on Saturday. There's a chance someone might be going up there. Five minutes.

Test it out.

Doing a little stand up.

Nice.

So show up come Wednesday night at seven. Parcel river north.

Love it.

Submit. If you want talent, you win $500 and a guest spot in the yak. Yeah. My pick, I think, is going to be a nuclear missile whale. First of the year. Megawalk. Megabomb charge.

Oh, no, it's going to lose.

That's tough.

Rams.

It's going to lose.

Rams.

Okay, cool.

Okay.

Minus six and a half against the command.

Lose.

Now it's lose. Now. That was bad.

You want to take the chargers?

Yeah.

No, I was thinking La.

Okay.

My first pick. I'm going to take the Cowboys. Bills over 50 and a half.

Okay. Yeah, I like that.

Points. Points.

That's a fun game.

Towards points.

I'm going to take commanders Rams over 50 and a half.

Love it.

Big over commanders defense stinks. Sam Howell is going to put up some points, I hope.

Love it.

I'm going to do something crazy.

Yeah.

My New England Patriots plus seven and a half.

Lighthouse.

Could be a backdoor. Lighthouse could be a backdoor.

Okay, I'm going to go Tommy DeVito plus six. Giants plus six in the dome, which is not a real dome anymore, because.

I crunched so many numbers for this game. I looked at it deeply in depth. I'm going to go with the commanders Rams under.

I like this.

We see what you're doing. I wasn't familiar with your game.

That could be the clincher.

It could be.

Yeah.

Or it could tighten the.

About that, Hank.

That could be. Yeah.

But I'm committed to it. But I might as well fight head Jon Snow. Battle the.

Eagles minus three.

Okay, three and a half.

I see.

I see three.

I see three.

Three it is.

Let's go, Memes.

I'm going to go saints.

Giants over. Okay, we looking at? I think I have.

That's Max.

39 and a half.

Sneaky way of letting us know he loves his pies on.

That's not true.

Yeah, it is. All right, Jake, finish us off.

I'm going to go with bucks. Packers over. 42 and a half.

Okay, can I change my pick? No.

Also, pancake update.

Hank?

47.

Jake?

42. Shout out, my team. Eleven pancakes.

Whoa, whoa.

What?

We're doing personal shout outs on team.

And you're the one doing the statue.

Okay.

Oh, that's interesting.

This crazy week from Jake.

That's interesting.

As I've said, very interesting.

Very interesting. By far the biggest week of the year.

No, wrong.

I gave you access to the sheet.

And if you looked at. You know, we don't click links.

Access to all of this.

No, you know, we don't do sheets.

I've been keeping track, Jake.

Yeah. Okay.

Personal shout out. Just put it in the record books. The referee of this is literally shouting out his own team.

So, wait, are you in first place, Jake.

No, that would be giving a shout.

Out for second place shout out, my.

Team for a big week.

What are you.

Max.

Oh, nice.

Heat lost the Panthers.

Don't say the sideburns. Okay.

You guys are more than welcome to double check my work.

I will not. I know.

Hank? 47.

Jake? 42.

Max, 34. Pft 32. Big cat, 30.

Memes?

27.

Tight rate.

So memes and I are looking. Memes are looking at 24 pancakes right now. In 24 hours. Well, it's 24 hours or 24 pancakes combo. I'm looking at 18.

That's like an hour for you, you fuck.

The announcements today have been on fire. This has been a mean episode.

Yeah, it's a loopy. Yeah, we're all low on sleep. Okay, let's do some fantasy fuck boys, then. Jeff Saturday.

What's up?

It's announcement of veto.

My stardom. Draymond Green. Oh, he was my sit. Well, he's my fucking stardom, so don't. You can't use him.

People might think you want to sit him, but you want to start him. You want to pick him up. He's going to be back real soon. I don't know how you get suspended indefinitely.

What the fuck does that even mean, indefinitely?

He's out. He's just doing that shit so he.

Has more stuff to talk about on his podcast.

My sit him.

Josh Giddy.

Oh, he's not playing too well. If you have him on your fantasy team, you might want to sit him out.

Oh, drop or handcuff him.

He's a little distracted.

And my sleeper is okay that time of year. Get the dreidels out.

I made it out of ready.

Oh, Dreidel also play.

Yay.

Hey, what's up?

By Zonds.

It's Sean Stilato right here coming at you. Talking to you about my sitting sleeper. I'm starting Al Michaels because he got fired because of Taylor Swift. Respect to Al, respect to the game. Swifty's off a cliff with you. I'm also sending Draymond Green this week. Suspended indefinitely. Indefinitely is a long time.

Did you not fucking hear me when I said to start him? I like that one. I hear about that.

It's a very long time to be suspended. What did he even do? He just attacked a turkish guy. That's almost like an am. I'm sleeping. Jerry. Judy and Juju Smith Schuster. Let's put together a little Hanukkah parlay with Juju and Judy.

How about that? I like it.

All my jewish friends out there.

Jerry, Judy, up your booty.

Mazel, Mazel.

What's up, guys? It's Guido Devito.

Guido Devito.

My stardom is Dicky V for no other reason than I miss that pyzon. I miss that fucking guy.

Cancer freak.

Good to see he's coming back soon, my sith. Draymond Green. Oh, good. Sit him.

Yeah.

Why would happen with Draymond Green?

He's suspended indefinitely. Indefinitely?

Yeah.

That's also what Draymond would say. Hey, I'm going to go fight a turkish guy. You want to come in?

Definitely.

Whose car we taking?

You know why he got suspended indefinitely?

Why?

He's spoiled. Surviving bar stool on his EaRLY show every morning. Disgusting. Yeah, indefinitely. My sleeper is going to be Tommy DeVito.

This is it.

This is going to be. He might be president someday.

That's a good.

I could see it. MVP Italian in the MVP most valuable.

Yeah. Yeah.

All right. You don't like that, Max?

I mean, you weren't even doing that.

You were just doing two fingers. You were just roping the air.

That's also an handsome.

No, no, not all Italians are perverts.

No, it's just italian.

Yeah, but all perverts are italian. Okay, let's get to our great interview with Jeff Saturday. Before we do that, pft, yeah.

Jeff Saturday is going to be brought to you by Apple TV. Mark, your calendar. The family plan, starring Mark Wahlberg and Michelle Monahan is now streaming on Apple TV. An assassin turned suburban dad takes his unsuspecting family on a road trip to save their lives this holiday season. Watch the family plan, a hilarious and thrilling new movie the whole family will enjoy. The family plan now streaming on Apple TV. And now, here's Jeff Saturday.

Okay, we now welcome on a very special guest. He is a Super bowl champion. He is a former head coach. He is someone you can see every single week on ESPN talking ball. It is Jeff Saturday. Jeff, thank you for joining us. We're excited to talk ball with you. We have a million questions. But let's start with today what we're looking at with the NFL and the stretch run because you obviously playing for the Colts, playing deep into the playoffs many, many times. What is it like right now in the locker rooms around the NFL for some of these contending teams rolling into December being like, here's where we got to be with our head at and how we can finish this season strong going into the playoffs.

Yeah.

It's always funny when people talk about must wins. These as a player are when you feel like must wins because you want to have that momentum going into the playoffs. Right. So irrespective of the team that you're playing or where they are on the playoffs, you're really not doing a ton of looking around. You really want to focus on you understanding that the best ones are going to be there.

Right.

If you're Dallas, you know Philly's going to be there. You know San Fran is going to be there.

Right?

Detroit's probably going to be. So you already kind of know in your head who the big ones are you're gonna have to beat, but you're always a little fearful of. I'll use an example. When I was playing Pittsburgh, right? Like Pittsburgh got hot right at the end of the season, they end up winning the Super bowl that year, kind of like a Buffalo this year. That's not the team. If you're in the AFC, you don't want that team getting hot the last four weeks of the season. So from your perspective, handle your business. Try to go in with some know and again hope for the other ones to kind of eliminate themselves you don't want to see again.

Yeah.

I feel like your Colts teams were always ground zero for the rest versus rust debate.

Yes.

You guys would always start out so hot and you'd have your division locked up. You would be the first team that you get the one seed. Congratulations. And then every year it would be like, are the Colts going to sit their guys? Are they going to play their guys in late December? And you probably experienced both sides of that. In your opinion, where do you stand like you are the ultimate arbiter in my opinion of rest versus rust, what's more important?

Yeah, I think playing is the most important. I think what I learned throughout was timing and rhythm matter. Right. And it's one of those things where so many times I thought we had the better team, but not playing up to those points. You got back out there, you kind of had to find the rhythm. And it's not that you can't execute or you're not flying around in practice, but when you hit the games, there's just something about being in and out of the huddle, the way you are in and out of plays, the way you are, the transitions that happen during games, flips, turnovers, all those kinds of things. And so I was one of those. As we went on, I was much more about playing. I mean, even the year that we lost the Super bowl to New Orleans, we had a chance to go undefeated, right. But we pulled our guys against the jets. We end up losing that game. But even then, I know we made it to Super Bowl. I still, in my head, I wanted to keep playing because I saw how many times I felt like it hurt us.

There are certain guys, obviously you got to rest, right? Like the guys who are banged up, you don't want them playing. You want to make sure that they're ready to roll come playoff time. But for the majority, I would say playing is the way I would want to go.

So you mentioned the Saints. They're not really a team that's being talked about right now, but I had a question specific to them that I would love to get your take on. We saw it last week, offensive lineman yelling at Derek Carr coming off the field I know that they tried to say, oh, that wasn't a big deal, but my question is, Derek Carr has been injured so much this year. When you're in the locker room and a guy gets injured as much as he does and he doesn't want to sit down, is there ever a tipping point where it's like, dude, we're not playing well, you're hurt. Like, you got to get healthy. I know you're tough, but you have to get healthy because you're hurting the team now, for sure.

And the problem is that you're new to that organization, right? And so he wants to show all the. It's kind of that balance, right? It's like, am I the tough guy that everybody believes I am, or are people going to think I'm soft? So there's this fine balance where guys want to push through injury as opposed to, I hate fellas, I need two weeks off. If you've been there, right? If you're a Peyton Manning, you've been there for 20 years, whatever it is, right, you've been there forever. Guys are going to give you the benefit of the doubt. I think for Carr, he's trying to build that reputation at the same time. But to your point, guys get frustrated, right? Because if you're not playing to the level that we need you to play to, you are hurting us. It was always interesting, Bill Polian, who's in the hall of fame, was our general manager, and I remember him saying Saturday, I've been around this game 50 years, or whatever it was at that point. He said, I've seen a handful of players that I would tell you I would take an 80% of this player to 100% of their backup.

Yeah.

And you know what? That's factual. There are just few people who are that freaking good that if the guy behind them could play at 100, you're at 80 or 75, man, you're just not adding value. The game is played in the margins, and there's too many good players. There's too many dudes who are that good at 70, 80%, man, you ain't cutting it.

You saw it with Joe Burrow a little bit at the beginning of the year when they were struggling. And then in terms of the offensive lineman, quarterback, you've had moments where they've shown you on the sideline yelling at Peyton. How much of that is really when you get back in the locker room, you're like, all right, that was in the game. Or can some of it linger from time to time?

So for P and I 100% ended on the field. That was us in practice as well. I tell people all the time, man, if they had cameras at practice, because he was one of those guys that was always trying to push you, right? And we used audibles at the line of scrimmage, so it'd be a freaking Wednesday, bro. We're in nine on seven, which is our time to really run block. And he's using some arbitrary call that we didn't use since training camp. You know what I mean? Everybody's looking around like, what? You know what I mean? So then we would get pissed and everybody's having words and it's going that way. But game time, man, it was always, you're in the moment. The minute you walk off the field, you're hugging. There's no issue. I will say the problem for me is that it's happening as quick as it's happened with the Saints. And so when you're talking about those experiences, relationships take time to develop, and it's already happening, and dudes are popping off on each other and frustrated with each other, you just begin to wonder, hey, how much of that needs to be calmed down in?

A lot. Let's have a real sit down. Let's really get to it. The only time I will tell you as a player, when you're seeing guys at each other in repeated weeks, that's when you know something's really there. If it's time, and again, no big deal. If it's happening week after week and you see dudes pointing and yelling across the bench and all that kind of stuff, that's real.

Yeah, I also saw on that same play, they didn't help Derek Carr up off the ground either. They walked away from after he got hit. To me, that's kind of a red flag. You want to help your buddy up? Is it possible for a coach to go back, show the team that film, be like, hey, you didn't help Derek up. You got to help him up next time. What are we doing out here? Will the offensive line actually see that and be like, yeah, you know what? You're right, he is our guy. Or is that something where that bridge has been burned already? And if a coach tells you to help him up, it's like, okay, now he's like a charity case where I'm going to go help him up because coach told me to.

Yeah, no, the coach will definitely say that. I can assure you. The coordinator, the o line coach, they have had those conversations, right? Head coach, you know, Dennis Allen's looking at like, hey, fellas, like we got to get this solved, especially in our division where we can still go win this thing and go make some is he is trying to fix that. Whatever the problem is, rest assured that is a highlight in their meeting of making sure. Hey, Oline, guy, go down there and sit down with him and figure this thing out. Because to your point, everybody picks it up, right? Like media picks it up, fans pick it up and they pick up that feeling. And the last thing you want to know is everybody airing your business? If you do have an issue, let's handle it in house. Let's not have everybody in the know chatting about us because people see it, man. And that cold shoulder, whether you like it or not, it's pronounced when you're on the field.

Does that go both ways? Like if you fell down on a play, would you hope that Peyton would come over and pick you?

Oh, not Peyton. You know what? Like those dudes are picking, you know, p would pick you up if he's kind of mixed up in it, but he's got other things to do. But the other o lineman, listen, quarterbacks ain't the same, right? I don't need them worrying about picking me up. I'm going to be on the ground every play. We'll get each other up. The other ten will take care of each other. But it is a big deal. It's a big deal when he's not getting picked up. That's your leader, man. I mean, whether you like it or not, on Sundays, he's got to be the dude and everybody's got to be behind him and riding with him offensively, especially because it matters. It all starts from there. So if he was mixed up in one, he'd pick you. But, but he ain't running into a pile to come get a guy. Let's just say it that way.

Yes.

All right. So one of the biggest stories right now when you're looking at the playoff picture is the Kansas City Chiefs. And they've lost two straight and they've looked bad offensively. So maybe you could draw on your know, career. But the wide receivers are bad. They have not played much. I don't think it gets really talked about because everyone's like, oh, yeah, they're bad. Patrick Mahomes good. How much pressure does it end up being on that wide receiver room knowing they have the best quarterback in the league? Like, if that happened with the Colts and Peyton's like getting the ball there, but guys are dropping it because I think that's an element that we're not really talking about, that they have not performed well. But there's also so much added pressure because everyone's like, hey, Patrick, Mahomes is the best. You guys got to figure it out.

It's enormous. Listen, I can assure you those dudes go back every Monday after that Sunday game and their stomachs hurt because to your point, it is a significant amount of pressure coming not only from internally in the building. Everybody knows, right. I heard everybody go, are they screaming at Tony after that play? No, man, because everybody know he don't need to be screamed at. He knows what he did, right. And so it's the elephant in the room. Everybody already knows it's there now, the outside perception of and you're seeing, and we used to talk about like, drops are contagious because again, as you're thinking about it so hard now, instead of just letting your athletic ability take over, you're like trying to fine. Focus on, don't screw this up. And you see guys get tense all of a sudden they're not making the plays they should make or they normally make, but it's deeper than that for the Chiefs, for me, for whatever reason. And I know they played together last year minus Smith Schuster, all that kind of stuff. But the routes, you think about how precise Andy Reid and that offense is and the west coast offense is in general, right?

I mean, everything is scripted mean, you know, everything. A slant is a know you're going to get here at this time. Everything is timing in that offense. And that's why, like a couple of years ago when people were playing too high safeties, everybody's like, what's messing up the rhythm? It's messing up the timing, right. He can't figure it out. But the receivers aren't where they're supposed to be. And I think that part to me is the most frustrating to Mahomes. I think that's why he had the blow up is because when the guys aren't there, it doesn't matter how good you are as a quarterback, you're going to be pissed, bro, because that's like job one. And his frustration showing the way it is, hopefully it lights a fire under them that they all connect or they shrink the playbook down so they can all dial in on the same page. But there is an enormous amount of pressure right now because nobody's going to blame this on Patrick Mahomes. And their defense is playing lights out. So when all the lights get shined, it's going to that receiver room and unfortunately, they haven't met the challenge as of yet, but it's definitely fixable.

But it's bigger than just the drops. This thing is getting out of hand a little bit.

Yeah.

Sounds like it's mental a little bit. So put on your head coaching hat. If Jeff Saturday, the head coach, stepped into the Kansas City Chiefs locker room, what do you do to fix that?

I'm asking Patrick and I'm asking receivers. What do you guys, like, are we overdoing this? Are we putting too much? What, tell me, what is the problem? Why we can't all get on the same page? Do we need to shrink it down? Do we need to shrink the package down at times in a season? And I would tell you this, I was one of the best offenses for 14 years, right? Like, we were always good. We were always in the top, whatever that was. Top one, five, whatever it was. We would have these conversations about sometimes you keep adding so much that you forget to fall back to the fundamentals. And at some point that might be what they're talking about now is, hey, let's dial this back, man. Let's run our favorite five. Instead of running those two times a game, let's run them three times a game or come back to that. Play another part, too. Let me just say it this way. Like the enemy not being there, it matters. I'm not saying that Andy Reid and Nagy, these guys aren't great coaches, but the enemy, he had some nastiness about him, right?

He had some significant conversations with their players, whether that's Mahomes or other people. And with him not being there, it does get into a place where maybe some things have been allowed or tolerated to a different degree. I don't know how to frame it, but I do think the enemy not being there hurts because those players in the room are ultimately the guys who have to execute.

Yeah. Yeah.

All right. I told you I'm a Bears fan. I had to ask one question. You were like, oh, yeah, ask me all the questions about the Super Bowl. I know you want to hear all the questions about the Super bowl, but a two part question. The first will be about the Super bowl. Second will be about today's game. When you guys were doing the Super bowl meeting before the Bears, was there like a whiteboard that was like, rex Grossman is going to give us at least this many turnovers. You guys have it penciled in. Don't worry about, like, we don't have to be perfect because he will give.

Us a actually, you will actually love this Tony Dungey was like this with every. I tell people all the time, thank God I never heard Tony Dungey talk about me in an early week competitive manner. Who knows? He would have said, I'm a bottom center. He's one of the worst in our game. This dude talked about Tom Brady. He'd be like, yeah, he'll give us two or three chances to make some plays. He never pumped dudes up. So to your point, let's just say we weren't really scared of Grossman or.

What was going to happen on the.

Outside with the Bears at that moment.

Yeah. All right. So that leads me right. Next one. I knew that was the answer, but I had to ask anyway. Give you a win there. The Colts Super bowl run that year, one of the craziest parts was you guys weren't a good defense and kind of put it all together at the end stretch run. Two teams right now that have Super bowl aspirations. The Eagles and the Lions are in that category where their offense is great, their defenses look bad. What is the fix this late in the season where it's like, even if we can go from a c minus to a b minus, we now have a real chance to win this thing? How does that happen?

Yeah, the Devils and the details. I mean, I can literally remember this conversation of that year. I don't know if you guys remember this. We played the Jaguars, man, and I think it was like MJD and Fred till. I think both of those dudes ran for like a buck 50 or 200 yards each. I think we gave over 300 yards. Like, literally, they both pulled their hamstrings because they were so fatigued from how many freaking yards we had given up. Right? And we get boat raced. And I remember we go back and it was Monday, and we're going back and Tony gets in front of the whole team and he's like, man, we just didn't really line up correctly. And I remember thinking to myself, I'm like, what are you talking about? This cannot be an alignment issue, right? Like, we got freaking boat raced, and he's like, man, it's so simple. We can fix all these problems. And if we do this, this and this. And it was like, he was prophetic. He's like, if we line up correctly here and we put our will here, and our Sam turns the ball back inside and he went through the whole.

It was, it was like we started doing that, and when they started, they shut down Kansas City. And like an incredible rushing just, it was like a light bulb switch went off. And it completely changed. And it was such a great lesson in life because it really all comes down to the details. And if you look at the Eagles, right, and you look at Detroit and the mistakes that they're making, all of them are correctable. And it's know, because you always see people go, oh, man, this player can't. Yeah, they can't. That player is there for a reason. They got two great corners that they haven't played well on the back end. Their linebackers have been banged up. They haven't gotten sacks when they should. But again, all of those things are in the minutiae.

Right.

And so to your point, both teams have problems that are definitely fixable. This is not necessarily a scheme problem, but this is two new coordinators, especially for the Eagles. Two new coordinators figuring this thing out on the run offense hasn't run it as well as they did last year, so that puts more pressure on the Eagles defense. Like, there's so many different things, but as far as fixing it, man, absolutely. I said this on tv the other day, man, it drives me crazy. Like, we've written the Eagles off.

Really.

They beat some freaking great. They had two bad weeks. San Fran lost three in a row. You know, what do you. I just don't write teams off like too they're too know these players can fix it. And I think the Eagles over these next four get right games will get right and figure this thing out. I will say this, the problem for both teams, Jalen, he's got 15 turnovers already. He had eight last year. That is a problem and the same, and you look at golf, that's killing the Lions. The Lions don't have the same margin that the Eagles have. And that's the biggest difference for them. Right. Is like, if the Lions make mistakes, they're probably going to lose. The Eagles can make mistakes and still win. It's just a tougher way of going about it.

Yeah, it's good points because we're the number one culprits of writing teams off. I write a team off on Sunday night. I have figured out the whole league and I've decided how everything's going to go.

It's really whoever lost the most recent primetime game.

Yeah, it's like they won.

That's on national television. They're done for the year. I don't see them making a comeback. We are very much prisoners of the moment in that respect. On a recent primetime game, your former teammate Peyton Manning started talking about your butt a little bit. He did some ass talk with Jeff Saturday, and he said that he could tell your ass apart from other centers based on how it felt.

So I want to give you the.

Opportunity to respond to that and say, could you tell Peyton Manning's ass if you were blindfolded? Could you tell Peyton Manning's hand in your ass apart from Aaron Rogers hand in your ass?

I like where you're framing that. Nothing's in.

Okay.

It's placed on. All right? So no in. I don't like where you're trying to lead on that question, but could I tell paint? I could 100% tell it was Pete for sure. Like other quarterbacks, I played to do 13 years, so I would hope, I would recognize the way that he would take a snap as opposed to everybody else. I don't know, the softness of his hand, any of that. None of that. And this is what Pete does, by the way. He does this every year. He loves to take a little shot and just leave it out there. I mean, I've answered this question a thousand times this week, and he just sits back, sends a little text. Hope you enjoy that.

Right?

Happy holidays.

Merry Christmas to you.

That's he and Eli, bro. They love doing it. They set it up as well as anybody.

Yeah.

So, another thing, know you got your hands. Got a hands in or on your ass. I don't know if you saw this clip, but CJ Stroud a couple weeks ago made his center change his jersey in the middle of the game because he was too sweaty. Did Peyton ever do that with you? It's like, such an emasculating thing to be like, you're gross. Go change.

Yeah, no, listen. Especially early in the season, when I first started playing NFL, we were in the AFC. So we had, like, games in Miami. Right. And even when we started doing the Jacksonville games late in the season. And mean, you're sweating, and so it does. It'll mess with the snaps. It'll mess with everything. And so you got a couple of pair of pants you can run in and jog in, or they have a towel they'll throw around you and you'll strip your pants. Now, I never had to change my jersey, so obviously, whoever this is, swampy. I wasn't swampy like that, but I did have to change my pants, but not the jersey. Thank God.

Yeah, I did.

See, Tom Brady had his center. He would have, like, two towels that was just wedged up there the entire time. Did you play with a towel?

Yeah, I kept a towel on my side just for my own hands, and Peyton always kept a towel in his belt so he could wipe his hands. But listen, man, we would talk about, I would ask, like, you can't help the it, like, figure it out. You know what I mean? And listen, it don't bother me a bit. I don't worry about the sweat. I don't worry about the smell. I worry about none of it. I got a job to do. You figure the rest of it out. That's why you get paid the big bucks.

Yeah.

So from your expert opinion, who would you say right now as the best offensive line in football?

Oh, good question. Thank you.

Oh, man. That is a great question.

Great question.

Thank you.

You don't even have to answer the question. That was perfect.

That was a perfect answer.

Yeah. Honestly, listen, because the Colts were balling, their offensive line was playing really well. The Eagles, I would say the Eagles have to be up there. They played probably, those are probably the best that I would put in the group right now. But here's the thing. Buffalo has actually had a really good o line season. They've played good ball. There's been some teams that have been kind of beaten up in years past about their o line play that have really made some improvements. I think Dallas, as the season has progressed, they've gotten better. Smith on the inside has become dominant. He had a freaking whale of a game against Philly, man. I mean, grabbing dudes, tossing dudes out the club. He's getting physical, but yeah, so probably the Eagles, to me are probably the best. But the problem with the Eagles is everybody's always hating. Johnson always gets criticized, know, jumping early and the tush push. Everybody gets pissed about that. But I like the way they play. I think they're freaking. And Kelsey's hall of fame freaking. One of the greatest to ever do it. And I love watching that dude play.

I would say it's not offsides unless they call it. If you're an offensive lineman, you take every single inch that they give you until they start throwing the flag and then you adjust. But yeah, if they're going to let you get away with it, then, yeah, I want my tackle doing that same thing.

Heck, yeah. This is what drives me crazy. Everybody's like, what? It's cheating. So is holding. I held every play. I'm not calling, but if you think I'm not going to. Howard Mudd, our old line coach, God rest his soul, he's like, God gave you thumbs for a reason. Use them, right? Like, make that guy do know. Don't be stupid.

Get it?

But if you're inside you grip those guys. Same thing for where you align. I mean, imagine this. I tell people, go for your job. Go line up and go block Miles Garrett and tell me you're not going to try to back up as fast.

As you could get.

The fastest. This dude is 290 pounds running a four five and can bench press every bid, a 500 pound. Like, you want to go lock up with that dude? Like, give me a freaking.

I'd put him on his ass until.

They catch me, too. And no shame in saying it.

Yeah, I play hat to hat football. I'd put him on his ass. Yeah, I go forward, not backward. Miles Gary, would you adjust what color gloves you would wear so it would be harder for the referees to tell if you were holding?

Oh, yeah. You'd go white or dark, depending on what you had, for sure, yeah. You go white glove on home and away. You always made sure you didn't want. Now some dudes didn't because they taped their gloves and they would put like the little cast in their gloves for their fingers. So if their fingers are all mangled, the booger McFarlane fingers going everywhere. So they'd put that stud, their splints in their gloves. I hated the way the gloves smelled, so I was one of those guys, I'd change them. So if I was going to get some white jersey, you'd white them up and vice versa. You want to give the referees, don't give them any advantage of seeing what you're doing.

That's very smart. All right. We're big gamblers on this show, and we like narratives. So there's a roundabout way to ask about your time with the Colts last year. We're big interim head coach guys, and you saw it, you obviously won your first know. Season wasn't great after that. But as you step in that room, can you feel the energy? Can you feel that? Guys are like, oh, yes, this is like, they're running harder, they're going to the ball harder. Like, everything's crisper because we love it. Whenever an interim head coach comes, you know that you got a couple games where guys are going to be flying around and everything's going to look different.

No doubt from my experience. We go beat Vegas in Vegas and the dudes play lights out. And we had the Eagles at home, and I think they had either lost one or been undefeated, and we lost it on the last play of the game. Hertz runs it in, and we made a mental error on defense and Hertz runs it in, but it was a tight game. We had to lead until the very end. But 100% energy changes when an interim coach walks in, because, listen, when coaches get fired, players get fired. That's just reality, right? Because the next guy is coming in, he's bringing his guys. He wants bigger olinemen or smaller alignment or pass rushers on defense, not run stoppers, different corners, whatever it is, right. He's going to have his own way. So it has definitely gotten the players attention. I would tell you the hardest part is managing the other coaches, because.

This.

Is their lives, and think about what they're going through. I felt awful for these. I can't tell you how it would keep me up. It literally gutted me thinking, man, these guys are going to lose their job at the end of this year, and it wouldn't have mattered how well they weren't keeping their jobs if I did a good job or not. I'm not saying it that way, but it's a weight, and you feel it, man. And it's like, God, it is a difficult situation to go through, and in my situation, and I guess it would be most like whether it's an assistant coach who's been on the like, I love Frank. I think Frank's a hell of a football coach, man. I think he's a smart dude. I think he's one of the best play callers I've ever been around. And I liked him personally as a human being and as a man, he's one of my favorite.

It's.

And those other coaches went to work for him, and those players came because of. Yeah, you're working with a lot of emotion. Listen, I love doing it. I love the opportunity. I can't tell you how much I appreciate Indianapolis and what I got from that organization as a whole. I knew it was not going to be good. Like, you don't go in thinking, I'm going eight.

No.

Right. If you wanted to win games, Frank should have stayed there because he would have given you the best chance. They wanted to make a move, and so they decided to go that way.

Yeah.

Was there, like, 1% of you this year when the Colts fired Frank Reich?

That thought or the Panthers? Yeah, sorry.

The Panthers fired Frank Reich.

Where you thought, my phone.

Maybe I'm going to get a call.

Maybe.

Let's see if we can run this.

Back for one week.

I would not have answered that call either way, but I would tell you this. I went about three days, and I don't know what I was doing, but I wasn't on Twitter or X, whatever. It's called now and I bring up my phone and there was a thing Saturday, the Panthers have signed Saturday as the coach or something like that. And I actually went back at the guy. I was like, this was well played, sir. And it blew up. It was good. It was well played, well timed. But no, those calls would not have been, I'll answer for one team and that's the one I did it for last year. The rest of them, bro, that ain't for me.

I do like to link you to every possible opening job being like, just Saturday, probably getting a call, come back, bring him in for one week and let him work his magic. When Jim Ursay called you, we're big Jim Ursay fans on this program. He got Dan Snyder out. We think he's entertaining, engaged, unique individual, like a very unique owner. When he called you, did you at first think like, is this a joke? Is he serious? Or what was the pitch like that he gave you?

No, there was no. And to your point, if you know, I'm sure you've interviewed Jim or been around Jim, he is a fun and entertaining guy. That conversation was not fun or entertaining. It was as demanding and forceful a conversation as ever had with Jim. We're going to do this now. Let's get this figured out. I remember my wife looked at me go, my wife was like, are you crazy? I missed midnight or 01:00 or whatever time. It was super late. It's Sunday night. I had been hunting with my youngest son and my wife. We were hunting. I just come out of a field. It was, it was as surreal as it gets. And he's like, I want to get this done and how is this going to look? But no, there was no playing around. This is what I expect. Here's what my ask is. And I told him frankly, I was like, hey, man, we're going to go and just know whatever your thoughts are. I had helped with talking about the old line, but I don't know Matt. I don't know any of those guys, right? So this is going to be.

But Jim had made up his mind and it was as serious a conversation as I had ever had with Jim. Again, you hope you never have another one like that. But he was for real. He was as locked in as I had ever seen him.

Did you last question about coaching last year. Did you ever have a moment? Because whenever we have an interim head coach and the team is bad out of the playoffs, did you ever have a moment down the stretch where you're like, fuck it, I'm going to go for it. Who cares? What's the worst going to happen? I'm an onsite kicker. Who cares?

Listen, bro, I had that moment a lot. I never felt like, hey, whatever I'm going to do is going to be this massive. And this is the part that kills you, is like the Minnesota game, right, where we have everybody comes like it's a record setting. You had this lead and we blow the lead and do all this kind of stuff. What did you feel like at halftime? I was like, I was scared to death at halftime. And they were like, what? I was like, man, we had gotten the ball like four or five times. We didn't score a touchdown on offense. You had to kick long field goals. We couldn't move it. And I felt like everything had been bounced our way. And in the second half, it started going their way. And I said the best feeling I had was it was fourth and inches or a 57 yard field goal. And Bubba and I, the special teams coach, who's not Cleveland, I was like, bubba, what do you think? He's like. I was like, I'm thinking of going. He's like, I would, too. That's a deep one right now. And so I was like, all right, perfect.

And we don't get it, right. And the next play they throw a screen clean to Justin Jefferson or to Dalvin Cook and it's freaking yard, right? And now that's two point conversion. It's tied. It's whatever. And everybody's like, do you regret it? I'm like, heck, no, I don't regret it. I'm going to put it all on the o line every time. So I never felt like that. The only time I ever felt like this was meant to be one and seven was the Houston game. When we have them down, like fourth and 20 twice and they throw these bombs and one time my dv jumps, like, at the five yard line and it goes over his head. It's like, angel, the outfield, bro, you can't script it anymore. I was like, well, sometimes you just ain't meant to be, bro.

And that's why the Bears got their number one overall.

Yeah. Yeah.

And that's why we flipped a. That was one of my favorite games of the season. That probably was the best Bears game of the season, and they weren't involved. It was. I was the happiest I've been all year.

My favorite part is the Texans fans and all love me because of a few things that have.

So that's true.

Whatever I could do to take that negative and turn it to a positive. I'm here for it.

I love it.

So give us your official prediction here. Give us the AFC NFC championship games and your Super bowl winner.

We're going to hold you to go. I think it's going to be. I hate writing Kansas City off, but I'm going to say KC and Baltimore in the AFC. I think Baltimore is going to go and I think San Fran, y'all gonna make me pick, right. I'm picking way early. I don't like doing know. I'm taking San Fran and I'm gonna take Philly. I'm gonna take San Fran and I'm gonna take San Fran walking through it to play. So it'll be San Fran and Baltimore in the chip.

I like that.

And who you got?

That'd be a great Super bowl.

I'm going San Fran. I mean, health wise, I'm just telling you if they stay healthy, they are a tough out. You know what, you all like this. The one thing I learned that I would tell you I did not put nearly enough emphasis on as a coach or really in the last ten years that I haven't been playing is explosive plays. If you look at any trend that really direct, even more than turnovers, that direct games, wins and losses, it's big plays. And right now San Fran leads the league offensively and defensively.

Yeah.

Fact, I think they win a dude off if you just sit down and name dudes that they have. I think San Francisco has more dudes.

Per capita than the other team. Yeah, we talked about it on Sunday. They had four guys go for plays over 40 yards. That's what they have. They have these guys that every single one of them can break a huge.

Play on you and they fight for each other. If you go back and watch like kittle block downfield, Ayuk blocks downfield. Debo is leveling people downfield. Everybody's putting like these dudes are about it for each you get when the ball has to be dispersed as much as it is on their like to get all those guys to buy in. I think no one's. I think he's an MVP. Right. Because if you see the way he plays and look at their team when he's not on the field, it's as reflective as Tyreek Hill.

This dude is.

He is a freaking grown man, bro. And he is about it in all phases. He ain't afraid to lay his hat in there and make somebody hurt. I respect that guy.

All right, a couple of last questions. This one's a little weird. I was lucky enough, I was down in Indianapolis for the final four. I think in 2015, I was lucky enough to go to a dinner. I think it was at St. Elmo's. We sat downstairs in a private room, and they said it was Peyton's room, and they told me that Andrew Locke ordered chicken usually there. That made me concerned. I was like, uhoh, nervous bird. Yeah. What was the private room like after a win? Because I would assume you were there a bunch. And what did Peyton usually order?

Oh, stellar. But it was funny. He actually has a couple of places there, downstairs and upstairs, but it always was more like apps being passed out. Right. Everything's going to kind of be passed out, spread around. It's always going to be a fantastic affair. Adult beverages would be flowing, celebrations going on. And then he had an apartment down there that we all would go to and enjoy. We won a lot. We had a good time, man. We had a great. I tell people it was so much more about the relationships than anything else. That's why we were as good as we were. We all enjoyed each other, man. Our wives and significant others all got along and we all hung out, and that's what made it so much more fun. It wasn't like one guy went one play. We all hung out, and that was pretty special.

Winning an NFL game on a Sunday and then going to dinner with the boys has to be a top feeling.

No doubt.

Yeah.

Listen, there is nothing better because you think about it, you only get at the time, that was 16, so eight of them are at home. Your families are there, and everybody understands that. So like, yeah, man, bring Nana and paw Paul. Right? Bring Mimi and grandpa. Whatever it is, whatever you call your people, right? It's like, bring them. And so your family gets to experience situations and people they would know. I remember the first time Kenny Chesney is chilling, and I remember my family. They love some country music, and they're like, holy crap, that's Kenny Chesney. But the situations that they get a chance to be a part of that kind of become normalized for what you're doing for this short stint in your life, man, it is an incredible feeling. You get the chance to share it with everybody. There is not a better feeling of winning in the NFL, like you said, and celebrating, man, it does not get better than that.

Yeah. My last question was going to be about Joe Flacco and the job that he's done with the Browns coming in almost like an interim quarterback, like three quarters of the way through the season. Stepping in. I would imagine that as an offensive lineman, he's a good guy to block for because you know he's not going to be moving around in the pocket. You know, he's going to take his drop back. He's going to get rid of the ball. Would you rather block for a guy like that or for a guy like Russell Wilson who moves around a little bit, don't really know where he's going to be. Like Joe Flacco. I think what we're seeing is actually sustainable in a weird way for this Browns offense.

100%. I'll take the flacco model all day. I have no problems. Design rollouts like what? San Fran, you're trying to get the quarterback out of the pocket or you're moving them to a certain place. We used to call it like waggle, where the quarterback is going to line up, maybe out, or on where the tackle would normally be. I do not want a dude who's back there floating around like, I want to know. He's six yards right behind where I started that snap, man. We can all function and play understanding where he is and also from the quarterback's perspective, knowing that he understands timing of when the ball has to come out. That's the part that Flacco does. I think people don't give him nearly enough credit is he's not a holder of the ball. Even some good ones during the fight, they'll hold that thing an extra second, man, he manipulates the pocket extremely well, and the ball is coming out. From an o line perspective, not only do you fatigue the d line because they get worn out having to charge you, but they get pissed off. I can remember, I mean, if I heard it one, I heard it a million times, guys would be rushing Manning and the ball would come out so fast, they would have to turn, transition, and go chase the ball.

Right.

The pursuit drill. And they're exhausted, man, and they're like, are you effing kidding me, bro? I got to go chase this again. And even if it's a five yard little pop pass, they got to turn and run. And, man, from an offense alignment, I love it. It's as good as a run game to me. Those dudes are getting tired, they're getting aggravated, they're yelling at each other, do this, get this. You can't run games nearly as well. All of that happens because of passer knowing where he's supposed to be in the pocket. And all the great ones do it, man. Whether it's Mahomes, whether it's Drew Brees, Tom Brady, Peyton Manning, like, you know, Aaron Rodgers to a degree. All those dudes get it. Ball has got to come out, man, on time, and he's making a great offensive line look even better.

I've never really thought about from that.

Perspective, but, yeah, that would suck if you were a defensive player and you rushed for, like, 3 seconds, and then no matter what, you were going to have to stop and then turn around and run again.

Oh, listen, I loved it. So, Bonnie Holiday, I played with him at North Carolina. He was a first round pick. I think he played 17 years, but he played in Green Bay and a bunch of defensive linemen. And I used to tell Bonnie, hey, Bonnie, you never got a sack on me, bro. I locked you up.

He'd be like, Saturday.

It's because he throws the ball in 2 seconds. I'd be pushing your last back, but I can't get. I was like, hey, man, it all goes together. No sack. Zero. Hundred for me, zero for you. That's how we win. Those dudes get hot because they make money on sacks so they can't pressure. Get a sack, dude. They get frustrated, and it fatigues them. For sure.

Yeah.

All right, last question. Rowback question. You're wearing roback right now. We love Roback. Rho back. Use promo code. Take 20% off your first purchase. You got the qzips.

Jeff.

Saturday is wearing it. Polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts. I actually have a vest and a fleece now that Roback sent me. Promo code. Take. Use it@roback.com. You get 20% off. It's not even a question. It's just. Fuck Duke.

Absolutely.

Reach that.

Okay.

All right.

Yeah.

That's all I wanted to say.

Yeah.

I mean, they're losers, right? Losers.

Losers.

Losers.

Losers.

Yeah.

Losers.

Dorks. Losers. Just the worst. That's it. Yeah. Wasn't even a question, just a statement.

That's the greatest thing we've said all day.

Well, Jeff, thank you so much. We love having you on, man. We'll definitely have you back on and love watching you and talk about ball. So thanks so much, man.

Let's do it again soon, fellas. Appreciate y'all. Have a great one. Happy holidays.

Happy holidays.

Thanks, Jeff. Jeff.

Saturday, brought to you by the family plan on Apple TV. Plus, check it out. Starring Mark Wahlberg, Michelle Monahan. It's an assassin turned suburban dad takes his unsuspecting family on a road trip to save their lives this holiday season with the whole family. Watch the family plan. It's an awesome new movie. It's funny. The whole family's going to love it. Perfect for the holidays. The family plan now streaming on Apple TV plus.

Okay, let's wrap up. We got fire fest of the week. Great week, boys.

Good week.

Hank.

You don't know what you're going to.

No, the head announcement was actually going to be that.

Oh, you cucked yourself.

I cooked myself.

Yeah.

I mean, I guess the dump button. I kind of got yelled at by Dave this week. He was in the office to be a threat.

Fair, though. Nobody thought that Ben Mince would need any sort of delay on a broadcast he was doing.

Well, we all knew he needed a dump button that was discussed. Dave was like, he can't go on without a dump button. And conversations. I thought there was going to be a dump button, but the mistake was that when I found out there wasn't a dump button, you laughed about it.

All right.

Yeah.

Which in hindsight was a mistake.

What's your job?

But in double hindsight, if you're looking back on your hindsight, it was actually a great move because the content that came out of it was fantastic. In a weird way, it was actually my best producing I've ever done.

It also wasn't great when the vp of content was being asked about the lack of dump button and he chuckled as he was getting warmed up for his morning 18 for a stream playing golf simulator.

You're playing golf? It's like, yeah, there's not really any time to fix that. So are we done here? Well, tea time.

That was work.

Yeah, that was work.

I thought that your fire fest was going to be that I beat you in golf.

That happened as well, but that was work. So it was kind of just like, you try not to bring in the work stuff home and let it weigh.

On your mind, but I did beat you in golf. And you owe me, what, $190 worth of chilies? 200 and $9290 worth of chilies.

Yes.

Can I go with you?

Yeah, absolutely. Hanks Payne.

Love it. Love it.

That's my announcement.

Okay. Pft.

Your fire announcement slaps.

Yeah, it does. It slaps.

Big fan.

For sure.

Jake loves it. I had a pretty clean week, so I don't really want to complain, too.

Shaving week?

Yeah.

What's that like?

You shaved your face up.

Yeah, no, that's definitely out of fire fest. My fire fest. I look too good right now. I look awesome. And it's making the haters jealous.

That's fact.

I have one final question, because again, I was so not bored, but I was just like, I have add, I get distracted, I can't sit still. And I was just hyper focused on the beard, the mustache, the color. I was trying to double check. I was pretty convinced.

It looks great.

Yeah.

Did you even it out today? No, yesterday it looked very heavy on the left side, and on the right side was a little bit lighter.

Maybe that's the lighting. No, I did not.

Might have been my angle.

I did not touch it today. I dyed it a few days ago. I reapplied yesterday, and I think that it got darker to me, I was like, is it dye?

But was like, it's so dark on the left side, and it's not as dark on the right side. That was the tell.

No, that's actually because on the right side, I don't think I have as much facial hair. Again, I am faceballed. I have the facial hair of please be nice, like a 14 year old medical condition.

Be kind tank.

So I'd appreciate it if you just stepped off. Maybe it's jealousy.

Yeah, sounds like it could be jealousy.

But I've had a pretty good week overall. My fire fest is that I am into a weird corner of TikTok recently. So I was golfing with the beeve and Jake last week, and sorry you couldn't make it, Hank. You were working golfing. But I got into magnet fishing, and I've been watching TikToks of magnet fishing for the last like five days. Do you know what magnet fishing is?

I do not.

So you take a magnet and you throw it into a river, and then you just bring up whatever metal is at the bottom of the river. It's usually guns. You find a lot of guns.

Oh, yeah, I've seen this in Amsterdam. It's sick.

Yeah, it's pretty cool. You can find like bikes. So I've been watching that because the beef put me onto it, and me and the beef just invested heavily in magnet fishing.

Magnets love it.

And so we're going to go out and try to do, trying to find some guns. You think there are any guns in the Chicago rivers? Might be maybe one or two.

Dave Matthews poop.

Dave Matthews poop. Is that metal? It's too soft to be metal. I think it's going to be.

Oh, no. Stop this. They're putting up pictures of Civil War general.

That looks nothing.

It looks nothing.

Max could see it. It's resemblance.

Listen, I did mention blackbird early in this podcast, and if you've watched it, you probably are connecting some dots about the sideburns. But Max is being a hater right now, and there's nothing that you can say to make me feel less good in my own body. Yeah, I love this body.

Yeah.

So, yeah, I'm into magnet fishing right now.

That's good.

And I think it's important to have hobies. And so my hobby is going to be finding guns.

Nice. I like that. I'd like to come along one time. Yeah, some magnet fishing.

Okay.

My fire fest. I live with terrorists. Not the Sean McDermott's kind. My kids are just like, for all the dads out there, putting your kids to bed at night is like a war, and I'm losing bad. My four and a half year old son the other night, there's no locks on the doors, but he was not going to bed. And I was like, listen, I'm locking your door. He's like, you can't lock my door. I was like, oh, I can lock your door. I'll find a way to lock your door. And so it was actually kind of scary because he, matter of fact, looked me in the eyes, he goes, if you lock that door, I'm going to scream so loud that no one is going to sleep. And I immediately was like, all right, listen, the door thing, that was a lie. I was lying about that. I can't lock your door. But this is my night tonight, where it's like I'm helpless.

What can you do against that?

No. That was the scariest thing I've ever been. A part where he's like, I will scream so loud that everyone's going to wake up.

That's actually a genius move because you have no defense against that as a parent. You can't cover his mouth.

Yeah, it's bad.

Do anything.

He also, every morning I take him to school, I pick him up from school, and the only thing he wants to listen to is swift. So, yeah, I like it. It's a lot of listen, a lot of shake it off. It is funny, though, because he was like, is this the song about the bad guy? And I was like, yeah, that's every Taylor Swift song.

Yeah, the guy that wronged.

Yeah, the bad guy. The bad guy in every song. But, yeah, I'm going through it. We're going to figure it out. Nighttime. I think everyone who's listening, who's a parent, knows it's a new adventure every night.

All right, so I've got a puppy that's pretty much the same thing as raising a child. And when Blake is getting barky, what I like to do with them is I take either a bully stick, which is just, like, a treat, which I actually. This kind of sucks. I made the mistake of googling what a bully stick was.

Oh, yeah.

It's bull penis.

It's bull penis. So you're just feeding your dog a bull's penis?

Yes.

Or I give him, like, a bone to chew on. Is there any way that you can just give your son something to chew on?

Yeah.

And then he won't scream.

Yeah.

Maybe take him for a walk. Yeah, take him for a. Yeah. Let him poop outside, jingle the keys in front of you.

You want to go for a ride in the car?

Throw a little toy. Squeaky toy? All right, Jake, wrap us up.

Pretty clean week for me, as well, but my streak of not having a bathroom emergency during the show came to an end on Sunday night. Yeah, I had to run out right before the lottery draw was.

It was Lamar.

I can hold the p. Lamar's Jason again.

Yeah.

So reset the counter.

Okay, we'll reset it. All right. Great show, boys. That was fun.

Yeah, it was really fun. Thanks to all the boys for being supportive. It's good having you guys in my corner. I love it.

Perfect.

Okay, you do have a picture of a serial killer up on the screen.

You're the one who brought that up.

Here's the thing, is, like, you can't damage me because I think I look good.

Yeah, I think you look great.

I think you're.

No, you don't.

You're just a hater.

That's numbers.

Haters.

20.

Haters are your marketing.

4018. Pug. 333. Pug. 71.

820.

Pug. Pug. Pug.

Pug. Pug. Pug. Pug.

56.

That's the first one I want on.

No one cares.

56.

Also, there's a new part of my balls design. Check out the website part of my balls.com.

Love it.

All right, see everyone on Sunday night. Monday morning.

Love you guys.

I don't know what today's to find. You shine away I'll be coming for your love of take on me take me, take me let the safe I said it, but I'll be stone learning that life is okay stay up to me it's a better to be safe than sorry take on drink on the tank on me fun? All the things that you say just to pay my worries away? You're all the things I've got to remember? You shine away I'll be coming for you anyway take on me take on me take me me take only I take only take.

Jim Gaffigan here with.

Some more straight talk.

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