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Hey, Pardon my take, listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.


Hey, guys, it's PFT. I'm here to talk to you about Peloton. I'm back on the bike this winter. Peloton is ready when you are. We started the Buns of Anarchy. We're getting back in shape. We're going to have Super Bowl Labs. It's going to be great. Bring home the Peloton Bike+ for the holidays. Work out your way. Unleash everything. It's your workout, your rules. As long as you show up, Peloton's instructors will help you show off and keep you coming back for more. For Peloton's December offer, head to www. Onepeleton. Com/deals. All access membership separate terms apply.


On today's part of my take, week 14 in the NFL, we've got some great games to discuss. The Bulls stay alive. The Ravens look like maybe the one seed, depending on what the Dolphins do. We're going to talk Sunday Night Football. We also got to talk Showhey, $700 million man. We did it with Jaden Daniels. Lebron wins the most important title of his career. The first ever. The first ever. A lot of sports to talk about. Great sports weekend. It's brought to you by our friends at Coors Light. Coors Light helps you find moments to unwind. Big work presentation. Follow it with a happy hour, some friends and a cold Coors Light. Weekend chores. Take Saturday off and hit the tailgate even if you don't have tickets to the game. Whenever you need to hit reset, reach for a Coors Light. It's made a chill. There's only one beer out there that's literally made a chill, and that's Coors Light. The mountains on the bottles and cans even turn blue when your beer is cold. That way you always know when it's time to chill, when you need to hit reset, just open a Core's Light.


It's Mountain Cold, refreshment, made a chill. And look at this, PFT and I. Twinzies.


You look awesome today. This is my favorite sweater in the.


Entire world. Are you guys brothers? No, yes, no. Remember that... What was that movie? Will Ferrell.


Step Brothers.


No, Will Ferrell and Chris Catan.




Had to Roxbury. Yes, yes. The Tovy Brothers. Yes, the Tovy Brothers. That's what we look like right now. But Coors Light is the one I choose when I need to unwind. Maybe you're watching a movie. Maybe you're watching a classic. Maybe you're just sitting and watching some football. Do it all with Coars Light. When you want to hit the reset, reach for the beer that's made you chill, get Coars Light delivered straight to your door with Drizly or Instagram by going to coarslight. Com/take, celebrate responsibly. And Coars Brewing Company, Golden Colorado. You can see it all over our studio. I think we're going to get new carpet soon. So we love Coars Light, one of our favorite sponsors, greatest beer ever. That's a fact. So go get a Coars Light right now when you're ready to unwind and chill. Okay, let's go. Now in the street there is violence and then a lot of work to be done. No place to hang out or wash in. And then I can't blame all on the sun. Oh, no. We're going to rock town to electric avenue. And then we'll.


Take it higher.


Oh, we're going to rock town. Welcome to part of my take. Today is Monday, December 11, week 14. What? What? What?


What? What? What? What? What?




Swamp spread. Now go get them. Tick, tick, tick.


Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick. Hank's taking pictures of us, Tege. If we start in the windy city where DJ Mandy Moore took a walk to remember into the end zone for an early bears lead, Jameer, Mr. Pibbs opened up a can and found the end zone to bring the Lions back before half time, but it was all bears in the second half as the Lions fell asleep desperately in the need of a cup of Jared Goffey to wake up their attack. A Josh Dennis Reynolds touchdown was the last scoring the lions would do as Detroit's dentist system stands for defense? No, no, I don't know. Sometimes. And the bears are back. Bear's 28, Lions 13.


Over to Cleveland, where the Cleveland Browns have no limit to.


Their Super Bowl hopes.


Behind their not so.




Quarterback. Joe, you looks good. Wouldn't you flack that ass up? You got David and joker. Wouldn't you flack that ass up? Browns in the playoffs. Wouldn't you flack.


That ass up?


Joe, who is you playing with? Flack that up. Yeah, so Trevor Bauer Lawrence's injuries were not nearly the same as originally reported in the media, as he connected twice with the Goat Sea, Evan Ingram to really stretch out the Browns Red Zone. Kevin Spacey, Stephanski took advantage of the young Jags D and don't tell nobody, but Cleveland is thinking Yoffs.


The Browns, 31;.


The Jaguars, 27.




Playoffs? Playoffs?


In Cincinnati, where we had the Marquee match-up of Gairner and Browning, also known as an Italian picking tomatoes in the summer. Ronnie Harrison Ford crashed into a Bengals player and took away the ball, landing safely in the end zone to make it 14-14, going into half time. That's when the Bengals used their secret weapon. Lacrosse player and Yacht Club member, Turner Hudson, to take the lead 21-14 and never look back. Are the Bengals on a magical run? Huh? Huh? Huh? Huh? Bengals 31, Cults 14.


We go down to Atlanta where Desmond Shitter soiled the dirty bird's diaper once again despite the best effort of Drake London, who tried to get his hands on a.


Millie Bobbie Brown Balls.


Laker Mayfield is looking to win the meaningless in-season tournament that is the NFC South. And as bad as these Hawkins look, Bison F. Kennedy-robinson shouldn't be planning any parades anytime soon. Running for only 34 yards.


Rashaud Walter White.


Met around and cooked up a whole bunch of speed as Todd Poles stood absolutely still like a Hank Lockwood-designed parking lot and let Arthur Smith's team drive right into him. Bucks win 29-25.


Going over to the AFC East, we have our correspondent, Mines in the Metalands.


We head to a saggy.






Where Zach.


Wilson said, I'm tired of this.




Salak. Well, that's too damn bad. You keep playing.


Garrett Owen Wilson said, Wow! Look what happens when they finally throw me the ball.


Randall Cobby, the Elf, found himself free in the end zone for a touchdown.


Will McDonald had.


A sack E-I-E-I-O.


And with that sack there came a win.


E-i-e-i-o, Jets 30, Texas Six.


Back to the game. Thank you, memes from Metalan, sticking on the East Coast. We go to Baltimore, where the Ravens answered the question, Are they likely to miss? Mark Andrews with the resounding no, as Isiah scored early. The Rams offense, featuring Cooper two girls, one cup, made the Ravens defense one puca most of Sunday. But the game went to overtime, where Tyon Rasheed Wallace said, Ball don't lie, and returned a pun for the walk-off, proving Lamar's Jackson was the best in the office today. Ravens, 37, Rams 31.


We go.


Out to the bay where Brock, old party bastard.


Hot one.


Hot two, hot three, hot old party.


Bastard live and uncut.


The Seahawks released their Drueclear missile as Drew Lock came out firing in the first drive and hit DK Adams Metcalfe for a touchdown, trying to shut the door on the Niners like it was an oversized suitcase. Placimo Samuel said, I want you to take two and call me in the morning, as he gave the Seahawks a heavy dose of ass whooping. The Niners, 28, the Seahawks, 16.


We finish in Kansas City, where Rasheed Kandaleez or Rice was tipped off ahead of time about the threat of the Buffalo Bill Kidaz to no avail. The game came down to the last try, where Patrick Mohomes came up short and was furious at the rest after the game. We go down to the sideline with Patrick. Patrick.


I'm just so ticked off with John McDermott, man. You know the Bills are building seven games in the wing column now. That's what Chris Alex-Jones was saying. And if it wasn't for that patriot act in late October, they would be in the playoffs. Meanwhile, Roger Goodell, he loves the Bills. He sure does. He's raiding my pet goat, and it's all about Josh Allen, the way they were protecting him today out there. I rocked my brain and I think we were so distracted by the NFL. We missed out on the NBA midseason tournament and how Leberton gobbling up all the profits. I think back to the 2000 election, just like Osama bin Laden, Sean McDermott saw himself the middle of the east, and now he's going to New York with a W in his pocket.


That sound just kicked off. Thank you, Patrick. That was Patrick from the sideline, Bill's 20, Chief 17.


Standing on a.


Corner, James, Winston, down in Nola, such a fine sight to see. It's a broken rib, my Lord.


Another broken rib, my Lord. Another broken rib.


For the saints' cubie.


It's Jimmy Graham. He's a man.


People forget.


That he's a ginger and his whole is.


A ham. The saints go marching. 28-6, I think that was the score. 28-6, I was right. And that is week 14. Fastest two minutes brought to you by our friends at Chevy. There's a new family with unstoppable grit, and they're the official partners of the Pardon My Take family. And that is Chevy Silverado, ZR2 family. The first ever Silverado, HeavyDuty, ZR2 joins the franchise to make Chevy ZR2 the only truck brand with a full line of trucks ready for wherever your off-road adventures take you with exclusive Multimatic DSS and CV dampers, rugged mud terrain tires, and up to 14 available camera views. The Chevy Silverado Z2 and Silverado HD Z2, a family with commanding and unstoppable grit. Head to chevy. Com right now. Check out Chevy Silverado and the family of Chevy Z2's, the official trucks, or pardon my take, we love Chevy. If you're thinking about becoming a truck person, go right now, chevy. Com, and check out the Chevy Silverado and the family of Chevy Z-R-2s, the official trucks, or pardon my take. Okay, week 14 in the books, we are watching Sunday Night Football live on the show. Everyone who wanted Max reactions, you'll get them.


We also, before we get into all the games, PFT, we're in a weird situation where usually I'm the one trolling Max. You partake as well. But it's actually Hank right now. It's Hank First Max. Cowboys fan Hank has come out of hibernation for this game, for this big Sunday Night football game.


I think for the rest of the year.


For the rest of.


The year? Yeah. I just love the people with Dallas. It's a great fan base, great fans.


You do, yeah. You certainly do. By the way, you show them a.


Lot of affection. Yeah. No, that's a great… I just realized it was fun last year and I'm ready to get back on and ride.


Why aren't you wearing the outfit, though? Where are the Jordans?


I don't know where the Jordans are. The Jordans are at my apartment. Shane has the dark jersey. I'm probably have to get some. I'm going to get some new gear, though.


What about your earring?


I don't know. You got to ride your boys.




You, filthy animal.


That's the season. It's time to ride our boys.


I love it. I love it. All right, so yeah, we will update the game. It's 27:13 right now, heading into the fourth quarter. We will update it. Max has quit 16 different times. Looks like he's going to cry. He looks like he's going to cry. He's got his resting cry face on. He looks as greasy as ever. It's a bad scene for Max if the Eagles can't have a heroic comeback.


The Cowboys just punted, and that was their first time punting the ball in, I believe, 17 drives. That goes back to Thanksgiving. Their last punt was the third quarter against the Washington Commanders on Thanksgiving. The first half was just a butt-kicking. But it looks like the Eagles's found a spark.


Yeah, they did.


Even though Max isn't paying.


Attention to it. Devante Smith just dropped the touchdown. Make sure you just put memes. Can you cut to Max's face just so people can get a sense of the rest and cry face that we're looking at? I just want people to be able to see it. It's just my face. No, your face looks like it's going to cry at all times. All right, but we'll get to it once the game goes final. If there's a big play, we'll... There's the cry face. He's crying again. Let's get in some games, PFT. This was a fun Sunday.


It was a very fun Sunday.


It was a fun, fun Sunday.


A lot of good games. A lot of bad games that were good.


Yeah, exactly. There was no better game in the early slate than the Ravens 37, Rams 31. That was an awesome, awesome game. It was a lot of fun to watch. We've had a couple of Sundays where it started slow, but it felt like this game was good from the jump. The Ravens now have a stranglehold on the one-seed. Obviously, the Dolphins still have to play, but they play each other in a couple of weeks. But with the Chiefs losing and the Jags losing, it's really down to the Ravens and the Dolphins for the one-seed. A win they had to have, and they got with a pun return walk-off, which is one of the most electric things that can happen in sports.


Yeah, and I'd say that this is a moral victory for the Rams, too. Yes, Rams are tough. Rams are probably pretty pumped to go to overtime against the Ravens. They played a good game. It didn't feel like it was a fluke. They've got great players. Puke Nukua playing in this game in the dog shit precipitation with no gloves on. No gloves. Taped his fingers. He's a dog. He's a dog. That one diving catch that he had, I'm putting that, that's my catch of the year so far. When you take into account everything around it with the weather and the stage and who it was against, that's my catch of the year so far with Puke Nukua.


That was an unbelievable catch, and he's so much fun to watch. Because we were watching all the games. Then when they show that play and we all gasped at him catching that, and then in slow motion like, Wait, he's not wearing gloves.


What the fuck? Feels better, skin-on-skin.


I don't understand that because the way they make the receiver gloves now, it is the easiest thing to catch a ball.


Yeah, he's playing the game on Expert Mode right now. That's how good his rookie season has been. Yeah.


But I wrote down, Rams played tough. That was the game. We've seen it with the Ravens. They've hosted a couple of teams that were, for real with the Lions and the Seahawks and absolutely killed them. There was a chance going into this day, whereas this could happen again to the rams. They went toe-to-toe with them. It really was just clock management at the end. Then that delay a game they took in overtime to make it from a third and four to a fourth and nine and having to pun, that was the game. It was like little minor errors where the game was high played. They also blew three coverages where it felt like The Ravens had multiple times where guys were just wide open.


Likely was wide open on that one. He was college open on that one. We also had a couple of great, just small moments in the game. Lamar kicking the ball into the stands on the safety. He kicked the fuck out of that ball.


Also, is Lamar ambidextrous?


I think so.


That's the second time we've seen him kick a ball and they both.


Have been left-footed. I'm pretty sure that Lamar Jackson is better with his offhand than 99% of the population is with their strong hand or foot.


Because he did that, I think it was like a year or two ago. It was a play that was Whistled Dead and he hunted it. He hunted it with his left foot. Then today, he hunted or he kicked the safety out with his left foot. He should start throwing left.


Or kicking. Well, actually, no. Justin Tucker, we said last week, Young Weku surpassed him as the most accurate kicker in the NFL. Didn't happen, yeah. Tucker took it back. Yeah. He heard the people talk and he took it back this week. That was nice to see. I don't think like, Young Weku is off to a nice start, but Justin Tucker's at one point was worth a first round pick as a kicker. Yeah. No more. But also we had a great challenge throw from Harbaugh. Harbaugh really let that flag fly.


He absolutely launched it.


I would try to hit the ref if I was a coach and I had a challenge flag.


Where are you at with the Ravens? I feel like the Ravens are the team in the AFC now that has maybe the least because the Dolphins, I believe in the Dolphins, but you can make the argument they still have not beaten a team over 500. The Ravens at their best have looked really good. They also, in a weird twist of fate, seem like the team that is the healthiest, which.


Is crazy. What happened.


To Hamilton to them? Although, Mark Andrews is out and that is big.


Hamilton went out too. Hamilton went out with a knee injury and the MRIs.


But the.


Quarterback helped. They're getting healthier. Right. They're going to get a big free agent pickup in Andrews at the end of the season. No, I believe in the Ravens. I think the Ravens are the best team in the AFC.


It's them or the Dolphins, and we get to find out in a couple of weeks.


Yeah, we're going to find out. But as of right now, gun to my.


Head, Ravens. I think Ravens, their defense.




This is just more of a credit to Sean McVeigh because it feels like we should do the conversation that this might be Sean McVeigh's best coaching job because it is a group that is not star-studded. It's not like the Super Bowl team. Their defense is a lot of young guys in Aaron Donald. Their offense, I mean, Pucklets are cool. It was what? A fifth rounder. And just in Kyrin Williams, they just time and time again, Sean McVeigh just schemes everyone open and has an offense work that is incredible.


And they've got draft picks this year. They're going to have some stuff to bundle up and trade for an active player.


This has nothing to do with the actual football game, but it's just as important. I love when a coach, when there's bad weather, decides to go full on deadliest catch outfit. Sean McVeigh did that today. He had the full blue rain suit looking like he was about to… Perfect storm just hit the biggest hurricane ever. I think it rained for maybe a quarter.


I like that, too.


They just.


Look so funny. You got to go one of two ways, I think, with it. One, I like when you get dressed up in a honcho and you look like you're going to a Gallagher concert. The second way I like is when the coach just pretends that the weather doesn't exist. Yes. Like, Dave has done that a few times where he's just like, You know what? I'm just going to headbutt the rain until the rain quits. I'm going to stay here and make it hit me until it's sick to hit me. Speaking of that, Aaron Donald, when he's getting triple teamed over the course of a game on almost every play, do you think at any point the offensive line men feel bad when there's just three of them beating the shit out of him every.


Single step. No, because then he just turns around and beats the shit out of them next time that.


He has a chance. Every time he gets the opportunity.


Yeah, I think they're like, This is nice that we finally have a chance to beat his ass.


The game plan was just don't let Aaron Donald beat you. That's what the Ravens were trying to do with their offensive line. But yeah, no, I think the Ravens are the best team in the AFC. I think I would say they're better than the Dolphins right now. We'll see what happens with them. But yeah, Ravens are legit. Also, on the challenge flag that hardball threw, it was my favorite coach's challenge, which was he was just mad at the result of the play, which was a touchdown, a very obvious touchdown. He just needed to get some rage out real quick. He threw the challenge flag about 50 yards. They looked at it for 10 seconds and said, Yeah, that's definitely a touchdown.


Sorry. Yeah. The Ravens, by the way, they have a tough schedule coming up, so we'll find out how for real they are, which I agree with you. I think they're the best team in the FC right now. They go at Jaguars, Sunday Night Football, Niners, Dolphins, Steeler. Steeler is not so much. We've been talking about it, speaking to the Steelers, teams that we don't want to see in the playoffs, I do want to see the Rams in the playoffs.


Are you saying if you're an NFC team?


No, just in terms of enjoyment of the playoffs.


Got you. I thought you don't want to see them in.


The play. No, No, I'm saying enjoyment of the playoffs, like first round matchups. The Rams are a team that I wouldn't mind watching play more football. I don't really want to see the Vikings or the Seahawks, no offense to both those teams, play more football because I feel like the have just a different gear that they can… It's probably just because of the quarterback. When I mentioned the Seahawks and the Vikings, like Stafford could beat anyone if he's on his.


A-plus game. Stafford did a very unnecessary sidearm pass today. He likes to whip that out every now and then. It was like a-Because he's like, You know what? I want to give Dan Orlowski some red meat so that he can really glaze me up when he sees me on NFL Live this week. Let's just do a sidearm pass for no reason.


It was a LeBron no-look where he does the no-look where he's looking, and then he just whips his head at the last second. He did that where he was definitely looking, did a sidearm and then whipped his head around like, See that?


No look. But to your point, looking at the NFC, there's really no team that I want to see fill that last spot in the NFC. If I were to say pick one of them, probably the Ram.


I'm just trying to say, yeah, enjoyment of watching football.


Definitely nobody from the NFC South. I hope nobody makes it from that division.


Yeah, I hope they just.


Eliminate the Bulls. Not Green Bear. You know who I'd like to see?


Yeah, the Chicago Bear.


The Chicago Bear.


We can talk about it a little bit. It's possible. I've charted out a path. It's possible. I've charted out a path.


It's unlikely, but possible. I guess the real question is, would you rather see the Rams or the Seahawks in the playoff? And then the answer is the Rams. The answer is.


The Rams. The answer is the Rams. Okay, next game. True Lock, though. No, no True Lock.


Big Cat. Before Dolphins tour comes after you, their win over the Broncos is now against a team over 500.


No, they didn't beat a team over 500 at the time of the game. What? The time, yeah. Yeah, that's when it counts.


Yeah, I guess, I mean...


Yeah, you got to beat a team. They beat a.


Team at the time. -over 500.


-no, you got to... It's at the time. At the time. Yeah, and I think what.


The closest-It's the time you play them.


The Raiders were the closest. Yeah, but.




It's a good win. No, it's got to be when you play them, they have to be over 500.


Because those Broncos were not these Broncos. Right.


Yeah, but those are the Broncos. It's got to be.


Fucking me. That was a flag. That was a flag. All right. That was a flag. Yeah, no, you have to be over 500 when you play them. That's beating a team over 500.


I mean, yeah, I guess it's.


Different in college. They beat a team under 500.


Right, but if this is college, well, it's not. It's a good win.


You're talking a net rating?






Terms of the.


Quads one, in terms of the computers.


The quad 1s.


The quad two. It moves to a quad 1.


Win now. Now it's favorable.


And you beat quad one team by 50.


Max, talk to us, Max. Talk to us, Max.


Use your words. I mean, the Cowboys have gotten bailed out on every fucking drive.


Yeah, that was.


The cry. That sounded like it was not live, Max. That sounded like it was a max soundboard. That was the best stuff.


That's AI. We should make a max soundboard. I would love a max soundboard going forward. Yes.


I love the yes. Yes. He's closing the gap on Marv Albert for the best yes chance.


Yeah, we haven't heard any, really, in the last two weeks. He's been void of yeses. Okay, next game up. Browns 31, Jaguars 27, Joe Flacko, elite. Three touchdowns. Twenty-six to 45. Only one bad Joe Flacko pass, interception. Joe Flacko, he's commanding the Browns offense, and he has been named starter for the rest of the year.


Yeah, we're getting ahead of ourselves a little bit. I think we all just assumed he was going to be starter for the rest of the year. I said- Come out and say it out loud. It's a different thing.


I said that Kevin Stavance, he should not have done that because the Browns quarterbacking is like the drummer for Spinal Tap this year, where it's like as soon as you name a starter, they get injured. I hope that doesn't happen to Joe Flacko. But yeah, you could have just let it go.


If you're a Browns quarterback in general, it's like you're an extra and final destination. It's a matter of when, not if. That jersey is going to look sick with Flacko on it, though. That's a great name to just look back on and remember.


For a while. Yeah, and it's also, so the Browns now have won a game with four different starters this year. Yeah. That's perseverance.


From Brown's PR, Joe Flacko was the first Brown to throw three touchdown passes of at least 30 yards in the same game since any guess when? 1980. Long time. I would not have gone nice. Long time. You remember Brian Sype? Yep. Don't you? You remember Brian Sype, that legend?


Dude, he.


Slung it. Yeah, 43 years since the Browns have done that. Flacko is taking this offense and putting in demon time because the offense is moving the ball well. Flacko can still sling it. He was moving around a little bit today. He's like playing his way back into shape a little bit, where he's like, Oh, yeah, this is what running is.


Well, more than anything, it is that Joe Flacko can read a defense. He knows when is coming. That's not a knock on D. T. R. And P. J. Walker, but Joe Flacko has seen a lot of football. I think one of those long touchdowns is a third and one where they tried to blitz, and he saw it and perfectly read it. It's like those are plays that Joe Flacko can give you that maybe one of these younger quarterbacks isn't really there to do it for. Because the Browns have a defense as good as they do, which is elite at home, and they're banged up. They didn't have Denzo Ward today. They didn't have Juan Thornhill. Miles Garrett is still banged up. They still were taking the ball away, making Trevor Lawrence… What, he had three picks?


Yeah, J. O. K. Was outstanding today.


Yeah, they're just a really good football team. I'm excited for.


Browns fans. They are. Flacko is now 10 and 2 in that stadium all the time. The thing about Joe is he doesn't really have any emotions whatsoever. When he won the Super Bowl, he smiled. Right. And he thought to himself, I'm about to get $200 million. Which was pretty cool and he smiled. He gave us that. But when he's under pressure, when there's guys blitzing him, he doesn't really panic because his resting heart rate is just constantly like 50 beats per minute, whether he's winning a Super Bowl or whether he's getting eaten alive by Josh Allen on the defensive line. He was what we expect Joe to be. He's what I expect Joe to be. Miles Garrett agrees. They asked him about Joe Flacko's play. He just smiled and said, He's elite. He is. He's elite. I call him a balldinger's cat because he's both elite and not elite at the same time. He makes everybody furious depending on what your take on Joe Flacko is. Here's how the conversation always goes. Is Joe Flacko elite? Yes. Why? He won a Super Bowl. So did Trent Telford. That's the end of that conversation.


That's it. That's it. Every single time. Or no, he won a.


Super Bowl. But he won a Super Bowl. Yeah, but.


So did Trentilfer.


Then that's the end of the conversation.


Yeah, you can do a chart. Yes or no, it always ends up with, but so did Trent Dielfer.


It's choose your own adventure and a flow chart and the last one. Can we make that chart, actually? Your guide to talking to your family about Joe Flacko.


Yeah, this is why we talked about Trent Delfas for flipping out on sidelines. I think that he has raged just because he always is the ending of the Joe Flacko conversation. Yeah. Trent Dielfer, when he saw Joe Flacko coming back, was like, God fucking damn it. Now we're going to do this again? We're going to talk about the fact that I won a Super Bowl, but it wasn't me, it was a defense.


Yeah. If you look at the outcome of that Super Bowl, the person that had the worst was not Kaepernick, it was not Harbaugh, I should say, Jim Harbaugh. The person who had it the worst was Trent Dielfer without a doubt. Yes.


I mean, Joe Flacko was a lot better than Trent Dielfer. Way better. That pass he made in Denver.


Way better. But yeah, the Browns are for real.


Now the Jaguars on the other side, their defense has gone away. That was the thing that I think a lot of people early in the season were like, Wow, the Jags defense. It's paired with Trevor Lawrence. And Trevor Lawrence wasn't good today. I still don't know what happened with his ankle. It felt like maybe he shouldn't have played because he didn't play well. He played well at the end. He put together a couple of drives at the end. But the Jaguars feel like they're a smoke and mirrors team. We're starting to get through the fog and we're like, Hey, wait a second. Why did we anoint the Jaguars?


Oh, because Pete Priscoe? I was going to say the reason why we're having that conversation about the… We shouldn't be talking about the Jaguars as being frauds. We should be talking about the Jaguars in terms of taking that next step. This year is next step year for the Jaguars. But because Prisco had to open his big mouth about it, now we're looking at as the Jaguars are frauds. Yeah, but- It's all about perspective. Pete skewed everybody's perspective with his Jaguars Super Bowl talk.


But the next step would be winning two playoff games. I don't see them winning two playoff games. Do you?


No. If the.


Playoff started today, they would play the Browns.


You could make the case that the next step is not necessarily winning those playoff games, but just putting up 11 wins in the season.


Yeah, but they did win a playoff game last year. They did. They went and played against the Chiefs, and admirably- They showed up. It was an admirable performance.


They showed up. They put.


Together- Those terrible uniforms. They have some bad uniform.


They had one great half of football in the playoffs last year.


Yeah. I don't really take the Jaguars for real.


Let me ask you this.


It's unfortunate because I love our guy, Chaps. We know Dougs. Duvall seems like the coolest place. They have another night game. If they could beat the Ravens on Sunday night, it is a pivot point for their whole.


Season back on track. But right now, as it stands, let me ask you this. Who do you think could win in the playoff game? The Browns or the Jaguars?


I would say.


The Browns. I would think the Browns could beat the Jaguars.


I think the Browns could beat the Jaguars. I mean, the Browns defense is not the same on the road.


I mean, a lot of people are saying that can Joe Flacko win against a good team like the Jaguars? I don't know if he can or not, but if they were to play in the playoffs, I think he might be able to speak one out.


Yeah, I'd agree with you there.


Okay. What? Four points? Four points. Four points, yeah.


And Doug Peterson, he went for two. I liked it. It was 31-21. They scored a touchdown with a minute left, and he went for two to try to make it a two-point game instead of a four-point game or instead of a three-point game, didn't get it. I actually liked it because you need it. It was all resting on the on-side kick anyway. If you get the two, you can win with a field goal.


I don't know if I like it or not.


I liked it.


It was funky. I can't remember the last time a coach did that.


I think the reason why I liked it was because the way they've made on-side kicks now, it's impossible. He was like, This doesn't really fucking matter anyway. Right.


Well, I liked it personally because I picked the Browns and it was a three-point spread. Yes. That was very beneficial for me, very detrimental to Hank. Yes. Who unfortunately is not looking great.


What's the deal with these peanuts?


Yeah, I'm ready. I'm ready to start grinding. Okay. Grinding some tape in the.


Not over yet.


It's over. What do you mean, grind some tape?


I'm watching.


You're going to watch stand-up?


You're going to steal other people's jokes? You should do that.


You should do that.


I'm not going to do that.


No, I like-You should do all of this. This whole set.


Word for word.


I don't-I'm a cover comedian.


I've obviously seen stand-up, but I wouldn't say it's like a huge, huge thing that I watch in my free time. I've been to a couple of shows. I've watched a couple of stand-ups, but I'm not super, super familiar with the art.


Tell us a joke.






That's pretty good.


That's pretty good. Get ready to learn funny, buddy.


That's good. That's really good. Okay, next game.


I'm trying to end up roasting you guys. That's nice. I'm going to play the hits. I don't know what else. I just can't do that for an hour.


That's low hanging fruit, Hank.


Just go.


Full troll, man. Really sad. Really sad of you.


It's just an hour is a long time. It's fine. I'm excited. It's a long time. I'm not going to complain.


Let's pretend right now, okay, your Sand-up set starts right now and I'll let you know when it ended. Okay? Okay. Okay. Bengles 34, Colts 14. Are the Bengles a team of Destiny?


Jake Browning, he looked pretty good.


Dude, we should... Zach Taylor needs appreciation because watching the Bengles play, I know Jake Browning has looked good and he deserves a lot of credit. He actually... Hes 79.3 % completion percentage in his first three starts, which is the highest a quarterbacks ever had in their first three starts since 1950. I don't know what happened in 1950. I feel like all stats just stopped in 1950.




Van Broklin? Yeah, it's a Siny Ball. It's like Sid Luckman. It just all stopped at 1950. But Zach Taylor, the way he's scheming, he's like, Hey, I have a lot of really good players. Who cares that I don't have Joe Borough? We got to make something out of this. Let's just scheme up all of our good players getting the ball in space and let Jake Browning just make easy.


Passes to him. He made some very easy passes today. I agree with you. Zach Taylor is doing a great job. Chase Brown hit 22 miles an hour on that screen pass where he just took off. How can you have a fast guy like that and not really use him until you're back up then? I would have liked to see Chase Brown more frequently this season. But Jake Browning, there was a momentary scare that we had with Jake Browning where we thought that he took our advice and he just decided he was going to fake an injury. Yeah, he had ainjury. -and then get paid. He said he went to the locker room, he was dehydrated, he got an IV, and then he just sat there being pissed off because he was cramped up. Then he was just staring as IV, angry, waiting to get back. Then he was done. He came back in, AJ McCarron hit the bricks, and then it was time for him to just take back over.


He's- Getting cramped up.


-getting cramped up. You know what? I'm going to put him in the moxie conversation. I think he's got good moxie.


I also think the Bengals, that win on Monday night, rejuvenized their season. They're now sitting here being like, Hey, we're still a really good football team. Let's not be the FSU here. Yeah, we could still make.


The playoffs. I think they definitely could.


By the way, shout out Joe Borough, Nice Guy of the Week award. First ever on part of my take. He gave his suite to Jake Browning's family.


That's amazing.


Nice Guy of the week. On his birthday, no less. Wow.


Nice guy of the week. Joe is a very nice guy. That was a very cool thing to do. As for the Colts, I felt like the Colts like the Lucky Bounds streak ran out. I thought it was going to keep going when they got that pick six. But the Muffpunt and then it felt like they were just running uphill for the entire second half. I hope that the Colts are in my fun team category. Shane Styken is a great coach, but it did feel like the Lucky Bounds ran out for them.


I think they're still in the fun team category.


Yeah, they're in the fun team category.


Yeah. Did they score? They scored 14 points in 10 seconds or something like that?


It was 25 seconds.


Twenty-five seconds. Yeah.


It was a touchdown to.


Them to pick six. So Gartner, Minchie, who looked okay today, nothing special. They ran out of gas in the second half. Second half, it was all bangles all the time. But I would still trust the Colts against exactly 50% of the teams in the AFC. Yeah. I think they're the perfectly average team, but they compete in fun ways. They have no business being this good right now.


Yeah, they're the exact average team. If you're like, Hey, who could beat everyone, blow them and lose to everyone above them.


The Colts. The crazy thing is I think of it more in terms of who could beat the best teams if everything broke their way and who could lose to the worst teams if everything broke the wrong way. The Colts beat the Ravens this season. That's true. I also wouldn't be surprised if they lost to literally any team.


Yeah, that's also true. Yeah. Okay, next up. Oh, no. Oh, no, Max. That was a fumble. Max, I think that was a fumble. Are you going to say anything, Max? He might have been down. Max, are you going to say something?


I think he was down.


Okay. There's 6:38 left in the game and the Eagles are down 17.


It's bad for the over.


Yeah, no shit, Hank. No, he was definitely not down.


He might have.


Been down. His whole body was in… This is my first game of football I've watched, Max. You have a hairball? When you're down, what does that mean?


Right, I get he wasn't fucking down. Talk about the game.


-but wait, they can't. His foot was down. You got to look at two sides of the same play. It looked like he was not down yet, but did he have possession? Was that a catch?


Oh, maybe not.


Maybe it wasn't a catch.


You guys aren't funny.


You sure? Yeah, they are. Thanks, Jake.


Thanks, Jake.


Very cool. Approaching eight years. You're such a bitch.


Wait, no, but seriously, when you say down, does he have to… What does that mean? If your whole body is in the air three feet above the ground, is that down?


No, it was not down. It was a fumble.


Was there a clear recovery?


Yes, there was a clear recovery.


Oh, fuck.


Wait, which team? The Cowboys?


The Cowboys? This is bad enough. Which team are you rooting for?


First hiccup, only one.


Any more hiccups?




Okay. You want us to continue?


Yeah, I would love for you to continue. Okay.


Well, they're in commercial. Yeah, they're commercial. No, it's not over. It's not over. The Eagles don't give up. Rocky.


They lost on Rocky Day.


Today's Rocky Day?


No. Do you think this game would have gone different if Dom was there?


I know they won on Rocky Day.




Yeah, Dom not being on the sidelines, obviously.


Well, Dom doesn't finish the.


Game on the sidelines. But wait, was Dom allowed to coach during the week?


Yeah, he was.


Okay, so.


That's the least game. He even was allowed to travel with the team. Oh, I just couldn't be on the sideline. Damn.




Have their binky.


Does every team have a Dom on their sideline?


I don't know. What are.


We talking about? No, I'm genuinely curious. I don't know.


I'm talking.


About Dom. The Eagles.


Did you really forget what we were talking about? No.


At least you guys are going to be in first place after this game, right? Oh, wait. I just did the playoff machine.


Oh, no. Don't tell me PFT. Don't give me bad news. Not right now.


First seed is the Niners. It says second seed is the Cowboys.




And the fifth seed is the Eagles. Fifth?


Fifth. What? It's a fake fifth seed.




A fake fifth seed?


Because we haven't played the giants yet.


It's what it says.


It's fifth seed. Wait, but the way the Eagles are playing right now is the giants are.


Guaranteed to win? Would you shut up and just continue with the games that we're supposed.


To be talking about? Well, how can you.


Shut up and continue? Are you playing at the giants next week?


No, we play at Seattle next week, which we.


Very well-But then do you play at the giants?


We have to play them both.


Oh, you haven't lost a game in Metallands, have you?


I don't know. You're so annoying.


Can you shut up and also continue talking, please?


I just want you to continue doing the part of the show that we're supposed to be doing.




Who decides that?


You. No.


So what they're talking about be what.


Is supposed to be talking about? No, this is what we're talking about right now.


I guess technically the producer creates the rundown.


Yeah, Max creates a rundown every time.


We do a fully-produced rundown on every single show. Max has.


Always given us topics.


They're all on the side. They talk to the show.


Two minutes the A block, now we're in the B block.


Yeah, what are we going to talk about today, fellas? I got some ideas. Lebron, Zion is fat.


Are the Cowboys the best team in the US?


Stephen A. Smith tweet was the best. He was like, Check out my new podcast. The show, Hey, Zion is fat. All right, Bucks 29, Falcons 25. Someone has to win the NFC South. Three-way tie now. The Bucks technically own… They control their own destiny. Baker with the game-wining drive. I don't know. I'm so sick of watching NFC South football.


I think that they should only play each other. You have to opt into NFC South games. If you really care about the division, then you can watch it to be the Panthers playing against the Bucks, Saints playing against the Falcons, and then they just rotate amongst themselves.


They should put it on the Pac-12 network.


Yeah, make it a real effort for people. I don't want to accidentally stumble across an NFC South game.


Exactly. It's just a chore every single time. Oh, that was a big pass for the Cowboys. Oh, my God. He caught it?


Well, Max is probably happy, right? He's a Cowboys fan. Wait, his favorite team is the Eagles.


It's the Eagles. I forgot.


Shit. A couple of highlights from this game with the Bucks and the Falcons. Goldberg destroyed a Bucks fan. Just planted him into the earth. Still got it. Probably broke a few ribs. Goldberg should play. Still got it. They should let Goldberg play.


Yeah, he could play football, play.


To Georgia. Yeah, he was a good player. Also, fun fact from this game, the Bucks had nine players on the field for Bijon Robinson's touchdown. So typically, you won that Western Notre Dame.


There was also a Bucks touchdown. I think it was White who scored where it looked like the Falcons maybe had a bet who could not tackle him. They all just flailed around and he scored a touchdown. But yeah, it was good for Baker. I'm happy for Baker. I don't want to see an NFC South team. I think we've said the Falcons just because of their names. But I'm so sick of watching Desmond Ridder.


Play football. Yeah, if it's Heineke, then I definitely want to.


See the Falcons in the playoff. Desmond Ridder, I know he played well in the fourth quarter. Both teams were like, Oh, shit, we got to try to win this game. But the interception, the fumble in the end zone, the missed pass to Bison, where it was a walk-in touchdown and he missed them, I'm just done with Desmond Ritter. I'm done with.


Watching and playing football. I think pretty much everybody else out there is done with Desmond Ritter. It's enough. I think Falcons fans understand. It's enough. Desmond Ritter is not.


The guy. We've had enough. We don't want any more Desmond Ritter. We're please asking out of all future Desmond Ritter.


Now that said, if KU had made to his field goals that he missed- True. -a different game. True.


But yeah, someone's got to win the NFC South. Three-way tie. All teams, what, six and seven? Yep. Six and seven. And the Bucks control their own destiny, which is crazy. They are sitting right now in the fourth seed. We're just going to do this again where the Bucks are going to... Although the Bucks, if they get the fourth seed, who would they play?


They'd play against the Eagles. Oh, right now.


Oh, that's actually a pretty good game.


That's an easy club for the Eagles.


That's a pretty.


Good game. Easy game. So you'd almost rather lose this game if you're the Eagles.


Yeah, you go play the Bucks, Max. Round one.


No, that is not how this works. They're more likely to get the fifth seed, the two seed than they are the fifth seed. If this season ended today. But it doesn't.


End today. But last week, it was all about how you had the one seed.


Yes, it was. And we did have the one seed, now we don't.


Okay, so it's changed.


Great. You guys are fucking geniuses.


Over here. It's a playbook tonight.


The playbook is that this defense fucking sucks and they can't hold on to the football. Dallas gets bailed out on every fucking drive with either a penalty or picking up a flag, which I've never seen someone call for the hold, throw the flag for the hold, and then say, You know what? Never mind. But they kicked our asses, so it doesn't really matter.


Damn. Quick poll, because I'm just curious. The Commanders were by week this week?


Yep. It was great. Actually, we won the by week because a lot of teams lost that were close to us, so we hang on to our.


Spot in the draft. Yeah, everyone won but me.


Jake- I'm doing a poll.




Wait. Let's cut to the plate.


Let's cut to the chase. Max, this Eagle's discussion is not about you. I don't know how big your head needs to be. We're not just talking about the Eagles so much to get under your skin personally. We're a football podcast.


Yeah, and Jake, your team plays tomorrow, so there's- They have yet to lose. -four teams that have played today- The Jets must have lost. -or this week.


The jets.


The jets lost. And the Patriots must have lost. And so the bears. Those teams stink.




Underdogs. Wait, raise your hand.


If your team won this week. Yeah, I'm going to count that as a dub. Okay. Big meaty dub.


Max, where's your-.


Jake's team didn't win yet.




Where's your hand? Your team didn't win either.


Did you not listen to the sports podcast that we're doing? We won because all the teams around us in the draft happened to win.


We won because the Chiefs lost.


Max, your hand wasn't raised. Is there an issue? That was a great max noise. Let's take a break and we'll talk about some more games. Max needs a break. Let's take a break.


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Did the Eagles quit? They didn't use any of their timeouts.


Yeah, I think not so much quit as they wave the white flag. That's not quitting. It's different.


I wouldn't quit.


I would never quit.


I have a reminder.


You have to drag me off the field.


You said, December 11th, Eagles to win the.


Super Bowl. No. No.


On the August ninth episode.


I was right about getting the best price at this exact moment. Credit to me for calling that because of the schedule. But no, they're not winning the Super Bowl.


The defense just doesn't look right.


They're not winning the Super Bowl. All right, let's talk about a team that might win the Super Bowl. Bear's 28, lines 13. The Bear's are back.


I'd say you guys could mathematically make the playoffs. Mathematically.


I'm not going to get ahead of myself, but I'm totally going to get ahead of myself. The Browns are going to be a very tough game. But if the Bears can somehow win next week, they played the Cardinals and the Falcons at home, and then week 18 would be at Lambo with some implications. If you just took out September, if you just pretended September didn't exist, the Bears are actually a good football team. Matt Heber-Flus and Justin Fields, they have now won back-to-back games for the first time. That's cool.


Wait, today was the first time?


Yeah, today.


Was the first time. You're thinking about keeping both of them?


I don't think they're... We're in a problem because I don't think... I think they're going to take K. O. Williams, which I'm all for. Matty Puflus has done an incredible job with his defense. I don't know what to say. The defense has been incredible. It has. Montez sweat. I remember everyone laughing at that. He was an absolute monster today. Brisker had 17 tackles. The linebackers that Poles brought in have been good. The defense lights out, and he is the defensive coordinator because our defensive coordinator somehow mysteriously left under very, very weird circumstances.


Hr was involved.


I guess we'll have to play the string out and see. But people have been like, Hey, don't you want to lose for tanking? No, we have the Panthers pick. I want the bears. This is when you have to start changing the culture. This is when you have to start winning and being like, Hey, we could start winning some games. You build off this. You build it for the next season. This is when you do it.


Can I give you some advice as an unbiased outsider? Yeah. Take Caleb Williams.


No, I think they will.


I'm all for it. And get a brand new coach. I'm all for it. Justin Fields is great against the lines. He really is. He's always running around. But do not fall into this trash. No, I'm not. If you win a few games. Justin Fields is still- I want you to hear me when I say this.


No, I know. I want.


Caleb Williams. If they win out this season- Yeah.


I think they're going to.


Get mad at you. -and they're in the hunt.


-i think they're going to keep.


Matt Eberflus. You should want Matt Iberflus on the other side of.


The son. I want him to be the defensive coordinator and just take a demotion.


-i don't know if that would happen. It would be the best thing ever. It would be great, but I don't know if it's possible.


For that to happen. That's why we need Harbaugh. I'm just telling you. I can just be like, Matt Iberflus, you're the DC now.


I'm just telling you as a friend, I need you to know that you do not want those guys back next year.


I don't think I want Justin Fields back, but I do Matt Iberflus. You can't deny how good the defense is. Defense is great. Yes, got in my head, I do not want them back, but I also have to see what happens the next… If they win out, what the fuck?


They're a good team. Yeah. It's important for the other guys that are in that locker room to end the season knowing that they can win football game. That's going to be a big go in the next year. But don't start thinking crazy on me and think that maybe Matt Ibrov-Luz has figured out how to become a great coach.


His defense is very, very good. Very good. Very good defense. As for the Lions, now, Lions fans are going mad at me because I actually said on Friday, I think the Bears can win this game. There were people who were like, You're an idiot. You're so stupid, the Bears. I think what's happened is because the Bears were so bad in September and people rightfully so threw them in the trash and were like, This team sucks. They haven't paid attention. Obviously, I'm watching every game. This team does not suck. They're not good, but they're definitely not bad. If you did a list of power rankings of all the teams in the league, they're in the 20s somewhere, early 20s. They're not in the 28, 29, 30 range, which they were in September. The Lions, though, the Lions fans are going to be upset because the intentional grounding call was bullshit that then led to Aden Hutchin jumping offside and Justin Fields throwing a dime to DJ Moore for a touchdown. My counterargument to that, so I'm admitting that it was a bullshit call. My counterargument to that would be, did that call stop the Lions from getting a first down until nine minutes left in the fourth quarter?


Probably not.


The were the better team on Sunday. That call was very big, and it sucked because it was probably the wrong call. But I'm not going to apologize because the bears were the better team and their defense played better. The Lions defense still is a big question mark of what the hell is happening.


Yeah, so the Lions, their defense, yes, their defense was very bad today, but also their offense wasn't that good. They scored 13 points in the second quarter. They didn't score any points outside of that second quarter. It was pretty inconsistent. Jerry Goff is a friend, great quarterback, even better guy off the field.


Facts. Facts.


He struggles with the cold. Yeah. They need to have a home playoff game. I think they will. They should still win that division because I don't think anybody else really is capable of doing that right. They're the.


Best team. I mean, the Packers are definitely capable.


Of doing that. They're the best team in that division by a wide enough margin for it to be relatively certain that they're going to win it. But you better win that division because you don't want to go anywhere and play outside.


That's not as secure as you think it is because they had to play the Vikings twice and the Vikings are two games behind them right now. I think that- The Packers win on Monday, they're two games behind them.


I think the Lions will take care of business. I'm not worried about the Vikings anymore if I'm the Lions. Okay.


If you're a Lions fan, you're not saying, Oh, the NFC North is all wrapped up. I can guarantee you that.


It's not wrapped up. But I wouldn't panic in terms of winning that division.


They have not looked good. They've not looked good in the last three weeks. That's a fact. Actually, four weeks because the bears completely choked away the game that they played at Ford Field a month ago. Dan Campbell said afterwards, I need to put a little more... I need to push a little more. I need to be more irritable. That's going to be fun for the Lions.


Yeah, he's going to have to figure out a great speech to give this week. I got one. Here's one. We're going to throw the ball more frequently to Jameson Williams. Yeah, and Sam Laporte. Again, throw the ball to Jameson. He's fast as fuck.


Not when the Bear's secondary is flying around. Listen, I know people, they love when I'm very much down. It's exciting. I'm excited about the Bear's future because their defense is something to build on. They have offensive weapons and they have the number one pick. It's exciting. If you want someone to be down and out and doom and gloom, can I offer you a max?


Why is max down?


Max, that game just went final. Your mic's not on.


Eagles suck.


Eagle's suck? Okay. This is two games in a row playing the two other best teams in the NFC, and you've looked very bad.




The season's over?




Okay. You have a magic wand. How do you fix the Eagles?




The defense is so bad. Nothing?


I mean, the offense, there were just bad turnovers, but they were moving the ball fine. They just had bad turnovers. The defense is a big problem. Big, big, big problem.


That was a.


Lot of bigs. Sean DeSai fucking blows. Damn.


-that's tough. -is Dom back next week?


I don't know. Hopefully.


Did they lose? The defense sucks. No, but Dom got kicked out.


Of that game. Hank, you bet the Cowboys today. What do you think about your Cowboys? We need a Cowboys fan on this podcast. We said that. Hank has stepped up. He's the next man up guy.


They're at home. They got to keep up these wins, get some home playoff games. Soopy.




You think it's Soopy this year?


I think this is the year. Okay.


Well, Max, the gauntlet is over.


That's good. I mean, you still have to go to Seattle next week. It's not.


A gauntlet. But Seattle needs a win bad.


I'm also sick of playing teams that just get extra rest.


Yeah. Seattle gets extra rest because they played earlier. You had at least four hours.


Last week, Hank, Dallas had a mini-buy. They played Thursday.


It's scheduling. Scheduling has fucked the Eagles.




What's happening. I lost my calendar. Twenty. Yeah, that's what's happening. Two days is worth 20 points.


Yeah. That's about right.


That's the math.


I mean, the defense sucks.


Yeah, Doc looks really good. I think Jack MVP.


He did look great today.


Yeah. Doc MVP. We were talking about it a couple of weeks ago, but I would imagine the odds would reflect that. But Doc MVP feels like it's got some momentum now.


I'd say if the conversation is down to Doc and Brock, they're going to give it to Doc.


Yes. Well, really, I just keep going back. It's probably going to be the number one seat. Two is still in it, like Lamar is still in it. That's how this award goes, unfortunately. Whoever gets the one seat gets the MVP.


Although if it's the Dolphins, I think.


It's Tyreke. It should be. It should be. Okay, next game. Sorry the the Lions fans had to listen me be happy. I'm happy like once. Never. I'm never happy.


No, I mean, you have every right to be happy.


I'm very, very happy. The bears could put a pep in my step today, and it felt good. It felt good also because people still think they suck. When you can sneak them and be like, No, they don't actually suck.


Were they five and four in their last nine?


Five and four in their last nine. Their losses are Tyson-Bagent, that Saints loss. They actually dominated the Saints. Obviously, the Lions game, they didn't know how to close out the first one. If you look at the last two months of the bears, they're outside of the game. They've been in every game.


Well, so the Vikings game, we all remember that Vikings by no means were the bears like a dominant team during that game.


No, but their.


Defense was awesome. Their defense was great.


Their defense can win them games. All right, Saints 28, Panthers 6, the Saints, man. It's tough when the Panthers are playing and the Panthers are a chore to watch. Then the Saints are equally as a chore to watch because the Saints offense. Deric Karr at one point in this game was 13 for 20 for 37 yards and one interception. Did you see his offensive lineman, Eric McCoy, just starts screaming at him? I saw that, yeah. Kind of woke him up a.


Little bit. They got into that. I took something else away from that video, too. It wasn't just him screaming at him. We needed to start monitoring Derrick Carr every time he sacked. I don't think these guys are helping him up. I don't think his offensive line is going back there and helping the guy up. I think he's up to three or four broken ribs right now trying to match Drew Bree's all-time record. I think he still has 10 more to go for that one. But still, that's an unbreakable record, I think. Yes. Drew Brees playing with every single rib shattered into his lungs.


He was Marilyn Manson for that one season, sucking his own dick.


You think, well, yeah, Derrick Carr, could he?


Yeah, probably. He's got his brother to do that. Yeah, I know his brother is busy saying that Marcus Mariotas should start.


For the Eagles. Yeah, my favorite-Which?


Maybe? My favorite thing about David.


Carr is that-I'm joking.


-is that he blocks people who make fun of his brother online.


That's just he's ride or die. But yeah, this game was the Panthers are just so bad. Chris Tabor, their interim head coach, usually you get a bounce with your interim head coach. They got negative bounce so much so that he's a special teams guy and they got a pun block today. That's the one thing. If you're the interim head coach and you're a special teams coach, you need to make sure your special teams is elite and never fucks up because that's the one thing that you should be able to handle.


It might be the lack of him being on special teams. Yeah, I don't.


Think so. I think he's.


Just not. That's why they're doing that. Probably not a good coach. The Panthers should definitely do the thing where they have a different interim coach every single week. Try to get that bump, keep going with it until you find a guy that gives you bump and then rotate again. That's what you should do. The Panthers are so tough to watch, so hard to watch. I put a bet in today on every team to score a touchdown. In the early slate, I just needed the Panthers. I feel so bad for Panthers fans out there. The fact that you have to go through this week in, week out. Bryce Young, the guy still hasn't figured out that he can't outrun a defensive lamin at full speed from a standstill. Correct. He tries to do it all the time. When he realizes he can't, then he starts drifting backwards and makes a sure sack an even worse sure sack.


Yeah. His first half, he was three for 15 for 28 yards. Yeah. It's bad.


Really bad.


The highlight- Aren't you happy, though? Because you got the plug pulled on you because the Vikings Raiders game, which we're going to talk.


To was-That would have been a disaster. -that would have been a disaster. It would have been bad. The highlight of the game was Myles Sanders almost scoring a touchdown, and he got tackled at the two and then you guys backed up 15 yards.


Then they just went, sack, sack.


Is it not time to start asking Andy Dalton?


Yeah, Andy Dalton, the one game he played, he looks really good. Oh, he looks great. Or it might have been two games.


Yeah. Have you noticed that this is Andy 2.0 that we're looking at right now?


I don't know. Andy Dalton probably is like, I'm cool. Just catching a check here.


He probably doesn't want to get in. I'm thinking that maybe the Panthers just want the bears to get a worse draft pick. What What do you mean? I don't know. Maybe they're just… I.


Don't know. No, that makes no sense.


I guess it probably doesn't. But why aren't they putting Andy Dalton in the game?


Because they drafted Bryce Young. You can't bench the guy you drafted won overall his first season.


I would consider sitting down.


Why? You're not.


Trying to win. I would consider sitting him down because he's.


Not- Or you are trying to win, but you're not able to win. It doesn't matter. Nothing matters.


Because everything that he's being taught this season is from a guy that's not going to be there in three months.


Yeah, but then you just got to get some game tape out there, see if he can overcome adversity. You can't bench your first round, your first pick overall.


It's for his own good.


For no reason, really. There's nothing to bench him for, except for that he sucks.


I think it's just like the people that are coaching the team right now are going to have... He's not going to take any developmental steps with this group of interim coaches.


That's what I'm saying. Yeah, more games. Just find out how bad you are.


Maybe I'm asking specifically for people that have- You.


Don't want.


To- -watch the.


Panthers on television. You don't want the bears to have the first pick. I see.


What you're doing.


No, I do. You want Andy Dalton to play and win a couple of games?


I want Andy Dalton to play just so that- Can I tell you- -I can.


Watch The Panthers? Can I tell you what would be worse than me having the first pick?


That guy right there. No, it's not- That guy. This isn't about.


You having that. This is about you having that. I'm not that guy. But there's no reason to play Andy Dalton.


What's wrong with that? The reason to play Andy Dalton is that he's better.


But there's no reason to… He's not your future. You drafted him one overall. You have to play him at least.


You might be doing more damage to him by keeping in.


These games. Did Mark Schlaers teach us that? The whole idea of bench, having a guy sit? It's like, they got to find out right away. I'd rather find out.


Right now. I'm just saying, I don't think he's going to get any better with the team that's currently around him right now. Well, if.


He gets worse, then he's not.


The guy. Yeah, but what if he wins a couple of games and the fans start believing on him and they're like, We don't even want a quarterback if we get the first pick.


Yeah, we have Bryce Young.




There's no.


Reason- They're not going to get the first pick though, Hank.


Because that goes-No, they're saying that they.


Wouldn't-no, Hank is saying, hypothetically, if they were to win enough games and still have the first overall pick, they wouldn't take a quarterback. But no, that pick is going to Big Cat.


I have that pick. I hold.


That pick.


You don't want a quarterback. I tuck that pick in every... No, I do want a quarterback. I want Kale Williams. We went through this. We talked about it.


A lot.


I tuck that pick in every night. I kiss it right on the forehead.


I do not want Hank to get the first overall pick.


For the record. I love you, Pick. I love you first. If I could have it my way, I would suspend all NFL operations for a few years and just hold on to that first pick for as long as I could. Just, You're looking at me like that, Fort Max. You're going to cry?


I'm just watching you.


Do the show. Okay.


All right, yeah, this game was a disaster, though. Nfc South is a disaster. It's a chore to watch. Pack 12, network. Yep. Save the Pack 12. Put the NFC South there.


Jimmy Graham is back.


Jimmy Graham is back.


Huge. He almost dunked the ball over the upright.


At what point is there a car going to sit down? He's getting hurt every single week. He has so many injuries. He's just so like, I'm not going to let… I think he knows that James is better than him. He's selfish.


Yeah, he is. It's messed up that they put James in at the end of games for kneel downs, just tanking his stats.


Yeah, I know.


I'm going to need James 101 to make sure on the next James graphic you include some asterisk on why James' all-time stats are worse because of these kneel downs. Please do.


That for me. Yes. All right, next game. Jets 30, Texan 6. This was a wild game. What was that, Mims? I said, Fuck yeah. Fuck yeah. This is a wild game because it was 0-0 at half and it was all puns in the first half. Then Zach Wilson, Spark. I might be back into believing in Zach Wilson. He looked good.


Zach Wilson looked great.


He looked good, Mims.


He looked really, really good. It wasn't just the fact that he wasn't Tim Boyle. It's not just the fact that he wasn't Trevor Simeon. He played good in the second half.


He did it in the What's up with that, Mims? Is he good?


I think he's not good. I think he's just the.




Backup quarterback.


Where a guy goes down, he goes in, gives you a spark, and that's it. Big spark. Can't play a full season. I think Zach Wilson is the perfect... Well, no, it doesn't work with this analogy because it doesn't say Mitch, but that has not worked out. But you can't blame a guy who gets picked number two overall if he got picked in the fourth round. You'd be like, Zach Wilson, he's making strides. He's coming along. He gets paid nothing.


If he was a fourth rounder, you'd be optimistic.


About the Wilson's future. Yeah, but we found a diamond in the rough.


Yeah, you can't really do.


That with this. No, yeah, I know. It's impossible to do. But I would, Zach Wilson played legitimately good.


Football today. He played really good. In fact, the Jets played so well overall. I think if you're a Jets fan, you have to be hoping that Aaron Rogers can come back, right, Mames?


I don't think.


I don't think.


It's possible. Didn't he officially say he's not? Did he? I'm pretty sure. I saw one crazy quote that was like, Oh, it doesn't matter if I reender it. That's not true at all.


In the cosmic sense of things? Yeah.


The world is going to blow up one day.


Just a flick of dust.


Yeah. What's that? Pale blue light? Yeah.


Yeah, that's all we are. Well, really, the sun is going to engulf the earth in 50 billion years. So what does it matter if he plays.


Or not? If he tears another Achilles.


It's actually selfish and very egotistical to think that your Achilles matters.


Yeah, for the Texans. It feels like the fun for the Texans might have hit a big speed bump today because they looked bad. Tank Dell is out. Nico Collins got hurt. Cj Straud got a concussion, and their offense looked atrocious. Four net passing yards. Now the Texans, they're right now outside of the playoff picture. If CJ Straud's out for a little bit, it feels like this might be, Hey, remember the Texans? That was a fun story for a while. Next year will be good.


Yeah, so he's in the protocol right now, so he's probably not playing next week either. It was a fun season, though.


It was.


A building season. You have a lot to look forward to next year. Correct.


We're going to get so many... This season has been so bad for quarterback injuries. Like next week, we're going to get Davis Mills. Just add another name to the pile.


Yeah, I think-.


We're talking about Zach Wilson being a spark for Tim Boyle and Trevor Simeon. We haven't even gotten to the game where nick Mullins was a spark for Josh Dobbs.




Was playing Aidan O'Connor who was a spark for.


Jimmy G. It's so bad. It's so bad. Trevor Simeon was a spark last week for Tim Boyle.




Tim Boyle was a spark for Zach Wilson.


And Zach Wilson is now.


The spark.


The Circle of life. He has now become the spark.


I'm going to make a prediction going into this offseason. Texans are going to be everybody. They're going to say the sleeper team.


The Regis Philby team is what I always call. It's going.


To be the sleeper team. The team that people think that you're not smart enough to pick for next season.


Yeah, Regis Philby, RIP, tremendous guy. Career never met him, but I'm sure a tremendous guy. I feel like it was always late August, and he would do his Regis and Kathy Lee or whatever it was called. Then he would do his picks, and he would pick the team that everyone had already done all the exhaustive buzz about all summer long. He'd be like, Yep, that now is the team that.


Is not going to do anything. I think it's going to be the Texans this year.


Yeah. Memes. That wasfun. That was a lot of fun. That was a great second half. It was almost the perfect half of football. And Meems called it too. He goes, The jets are about to go on a touchdown drive right as the second half started. And he was right. And then they scored. Did they score in six straight possessions? Yeah, six second half scoring possessions for Zach Wilson.


You guys figured it out. You unlocked Nathaniel Hackett's offense. I think they would have.


Scored when he fumbled too. Yeah.


But that's just a rain.


Yeah, that was a rain. But something clicked. I don't know what, but something clicked. It's crazy the overhit in this game.


This game for the first half looked like the most miserable football experience to attend in person, maybe of the season. It was just rainy, cold, Zach Wilson, Meadowlands, no points, pints. It was bad. It was real bad. Then second half was completely different. No idea what happened to Zach at half-time, but I want to find out what that was.


That's a good segue to the most miserable football game that we've seen in a very long time, the Vikings 3, Raider 0. It was the lowest scoring game in NFL history in the indoor stadium.


Yeah, so I was thinking about other 0-3 games, 3-0 games. We all remember 2007, the Monday Night Football game. The Steeler's Dolphins. The Steeler's Dolphins. Jeff Reed kicked a field goal, I think, with what, I don't know, 15 seconds left? 17 seconds left in the game to give the Steeler's the win 3-0. That game was outdoors. That game was played at Heinz Field at the time. A couple of days after Pittsburgh played a home game there. The field was chewed up. There was a pun that was hit in the game that just landed and didn't move. It just stuck in the earth because it was so muddy. This game was played in one of the newest stadiums on some of the most expensive grassout. It felt like every time I looked up at this game, one team or another had the ball at the 40-yard line. That was it. It never really got close.


It was 16 puns, eight three and outs. Half of the puns were three and outs, a misfield goal and interception. That was the game. The two teams combined went 11 for 34 on third down. It was so miserable. Somehow they went three for three on fourth.




Pretty impressive. Pretty crazy. But yeah, it was the death of two fun storylines that were happening. One being Antonio pierce came in. Everyone was happy Josh McDaniels was gone because Josh McDaniels, by all accounts, is the worst person ever, wins two games. Now they've lost three straight. The other one, unfortunately, Josh Dobbs, he's learned too much. He knows too much of the offense. He's back to being Josh Dobbs. I wish they had pulled the plug a week earlier so that we could still have good memories because this was like when nick Mullins has to come in and save the day, it might be over.


For Josh Dobbs. Yeah, it was very painful. Neither quarterback played well. Josh Dobbs, they should just have him not practice during the week. Just have him show up on.


Game day. I was.


Like- Get out there. We're going to roll the ball out there. Josh, you just do your thing that you do. That would be way more entertaining because the Vikings, they're boring. The Raiders didn't look any better. I saw a report that Mark Davis met with Antonio pierce for an hour after the game. That would be something if he got fired.


He probably just crying.


As interim head coach. It was probably.


Just Mark Davis was probably crying in Antonio Pierce's arms, big burly arms.


They're there, Mark. The best part of this game was the Kegstand celebration by the Vikings defense. The guy turned over and go to the end zone and they just lift the guy up like he's doing a Kegstand. One of the other guys in the defense just walked around pretending to be drunk in the end zone, which was awesome. That was very cool. That's how I felt watching this. I wish it made me.


Football drunk. The only other part of the game that I liked was the Vikings have a player, Josh Metalyst. I don't know if I pronounced his name right. How many positions do you think he's played this year?


He's Mr. Positions. On defense? He's Mr. Positions. On defense? Four.


He's played all of them.




They showed the graphic. He's played strong safety, free safety, left cornerback, right cornerback, slot cornerback, left inside linebacker, right inside linebacker, middle linebacker, left outside linebacker, right outside linebacker, right defensive end, left defensive end. I guess he hasn't played nose tackle.


That's Mr.


Positions. How insane.


Is that? It is pretty crazy. Also, I guess, shout out to their defense.




Flores. Yeah, no, their- Is doing some stuff that we haven't seen ever.


The Vikings defense is one of those defense at the beginning of the season. Everyone's like, they didn't look like they made big steps from last year because that was their big problem. But they clearly have. They're playing a lot better. It does suck because if you're a Vikings fan, like Kurt Cousins and Justin Jefferson, if they're playing on this team right now, they are a team that would be a threat in.


The NFC. I read a headline and the first paragraph of an article about this defense. Go on. Not to brag. I usually cut off at just halfway through the headline. I look at the picture and I go on vibes. This time I read the first paragraph. Bryan Flores has invented a new way to play defense that's never been done in the NFL in terms of their zone blitzing and how they design the coverage on the back end. No coach can recognize it. No coach can figure it out. But he just sat down. He's like, You know what? I've had a couple of years to think this through. I'm just going to invent a new defense. I guess part of that is having a guy that can play literally every position on the team.


It's insane. That graphic, I was like, How is this possible? How is someone can play cornerback and then also play defensive end? But he's done it.


It doesn't make sense. Yeah.


This game was tough. It was a tough watch.


I wanted a 0-0 tie. Is that too much to ask? It would have been great. Yeah, it has been done how many times, Jake? Seventy-three. Seventy-three times. That's insane that there have.


Been 73. First by the Dayton Triangles.


The Dayton Triangles.


And the Cleveland Tigers. Who could forget? 1920.


Yeah, I.


Wanted to-I mean, that's such a mismatch in names.


The triangles and the tigers?


Yeah, the tigers are going up against the triangles.


Yeah, well, they tied.




The mascot or the drawing that they had that represent the Dayton Triangles, just how did people exist with football as it was back in the 1920s? How did the league ever survive to ever see the beautiful forward pass?


Why were they? Oh, it was named after their home field, Triangle Park. That was a situation where it was like Anchor Man, Michael Scott's character, was just naming things like, What should we be named? Well, it's Triangle Park. Yeah. Okay. Triangles. Triangles will be the triangles.


Yeah, so I just wanted the 0-0 tie. I would like to see that at one point in my lifetime. This was probably the closest that we're going to get to it.


Oh, this is our, you know who head coached the Dayton Triangles? We had a guy, Greasy Neal. Oh, really? Remember we talked about Greasy Neal? Yeah. Because Greasy Neal, I think, played football and baseball and was like, he did everything. He coached in college and the NFL. Yeah, he won a couple of NFL championships. Greasy Neal. Probably was in the war. Yeah, he played for the Reds. He was a beast, Greasy Neal.


We did get a Josh, Rose, and Stout line on Josh Dobbs today. It was so bad. It's over. He was 10 for 23, 63 yards. Yeah.


I feel like if you're the Vikings, you go to nick Mullins or maybe J. A. R. And Hall because remember, he actually had a little pep before he got concussed.




Guess so. Yeah, but I mean, just see what you got. You might as well. Okay, before we get to the other afternoon games, let's pause for another ad.


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Boys, breaking news. Huge breaking news. If you remember on Thursday, Max and Hank will not remember because they're on a 24-hour stream, we were previewing games and we said, We are Jake Browning, guys, because there's just no way that Jake Browning doesn't listen to this show. His DMs were open. He didn't follow any of us. I DMed him on Thursday at 3:10, and I said, Jake, we're rooting for you this weekend. Thanks for listening to the show. A little presumptuous of me, just assuming he does. He just wrote me back at 9:05 tonight and said, Thank you, big fan of the show. Let's go. Very cool, Jake. We're Jake.


Browning, guys. I love it.


We called our shot.




One cluster.


Of the quarterback? Yeah. Well, I said we'll get him on after the season. Look, he's got something going. It's going good right now. We don't want to mess.


With it. Yeah, Jake, if you listen to Friday's show, just know that there's a reason why me and Big Cat aren't in the NFL and you're in the NFL. But from two guys who watch a lot of NFL, it's time to cash in.


Yeah, cashCash in. Cash in. We'll be your agents. We also have other breaking moves. Breaking moves. We have a text battle going on on the part where I take text change.




Just produce this-It's producers producing. It's producers producing. I'll read them in order. Hank sent us a stat and it says, this is a shocking stat. Thank you. Since 2000, there have been 116 teams with 10 plus wins through week 14 of the NFL season. Among that group, the 2023 Eagles rank 103 with a point differential of plus 21.


So relevant.


That is a relevant stat. Then Max responded with a, Patriots are eliminated from the playoffs graphic with the Lighthouse.


Which is just a lash out stat. By the way-.


That's irrelevant. Wait, no, is it true or not?


It's true, but we're not. That was true.


Did that happen today?


Good question.


We're not talking about the Patriots. It did happen today.


But it happened. It's NFL news from today.


That is from today.


But we're talking about… We're not talking about the Patriots. We're talking about the Relevance. We're not talking about the Patriots. We're even talking about the Patriots today.


Then Hank responded with a tweet from our good friend, Adam Forone, aka Sal Palantonio. Angelo. Angelo, Palletonio. Sorry. He wrote, No hyperbole. The Eagles look like one of the worst teams in the NFL over the last two weeks. Offense, bad. Defense, bad. I'm generally a positive person. There's no denying how abysmal the Eagles have looked sad. That's actually a good point by Rowan. You keep going after the defense. The offenses looked very bad as.


Well, Max. I can watch that game and go home and be like, That was a weird game for the offense. I think the defense is actually that bad.


There was a lot of-They had a couple of weird games here now.


But that.


Was just like-Yeah, they played two good defenses and both have been weird games.


But it was turnovers. You say turnover, Lux is a thing. Our two best receivers is dropping balls that they do not normally drop.


If they don't have a rhythm.


Yeah, if there was a bunch of stall drives and couldn't get the ball. I didn't see that as much tonight. I'm not worried about the offense.


Is Mariota healthy?


Well, my question was going to be, is jail and hurts okay?




Might not be okay. You might not be healthy. I mean.


Aj Brown and Devante Smith just kept dropping balls.


They dropped.


Some balls. Other than the fumble, I don't think that hurts even looked that bad to me.


Okay, well, the offense does look bad. They scored 13 points and 19 points against.


The guys in the ninth. Correct, but.


I test that- But the offense does have to score points. If the defense played 20 points better, they still would have gone 0 and 2.


Yeah, you say turnover luck is a thing.


It is. Yeah.


But that doesn't mean that if you commit a lot of turnovers, you're just unlucky.


You guys also got a fumbled touchdown.


Yeah, good point, Hank. That's actually, you're absolutely right.


We're talking about the offense.


No, but you said turnover luck. Yeah, no, that ball battle was- We're talking about the offense. -and you actually scored points.


The offense actually only scored six points, two field goals. I get it.


But I can watch that game and be like, Okay, I- The.


Offense didn't score a touchdown, but we're good.


Yeah, that's a good point, Hank.


I'm not worried about the offense.


That's all I have. Sounds like you should be. You didn't.


Score a touchdown. Okay, I get it. What do you want to keep.


Going in circles here? Okay, let's move forward. Is this next game against the Seahawks that a must-win?


Yes. What happens if you lose, though? You're still in the playoffs, right?


Well, you guys keep doing... It's either a must-win or it's not. You fuckers keep saying this. Then no matter what I say, I'm still bad.


Well, no, I'm just saying that you were 0 for 2 in your last two must-wins.


But when I don't say it's a must-win, you get on me. When I do say it's a must-win, you get on me. You fucking suck.




Some point, there it is.


At some point, Max, when you lose enough must-wins in a row, you got to change.


The vibe. I lose them all.


The Max hated… You did get a bunch of new Max fans on Thursday after your MVP performance of the 24 Hours Stream.


Because you guys just put me on the show and then try to make me mad. Then people are like, This guy sucks because he gets mad all the time, but it's because you guys just make me mad.


Be fair, we don't have to try very hard.


We were eating dinner and I said to Max, I was like, Is this one of those nights that you wish you weren't the producer, apart me. He's like, Yes.


Just grumbled it. I just hate watching games with you guys. I hate watching Eagles.


I like watching games with my boys. You guys are all my boys. Me too. It's fucking fun.


I cherish.


These days.


It is. You're going to miss this. You're going to miss this out of.


The season. Someday we'll all be gone and you'll be sad.


I'll be watching Eagles games with people who like The Eagles.


You have to watch a Super Bowl with Rowan.


And me. I like The Eagles at that point.


It's just sad.


Okay. All right, next game. Big news for the Jake Browning fan club. We are the.


Charter members. I love Jake Browning.


We called our shot.


He listens to the show. We should send him a bunch of Omaha steaks and a bunch of honey. Yeah.


Eat up, big boy. You need your strength.




Exactly that on the note. Okay, 49ers, 28, Seahawks, 16. 49ers are just really fucking good. Here's how good these 49ers are. Christian McAfrey had a 72-yard play. Debo Samuel had a 54-yard play. Brandon and I had a 45-yard play. Kiddle had a 44-yard play. It's pretty fucking scary when all four of those guys are just like, Yeah, let me rip off an insanely.


Big play. I would say the 49ers at their best are better than any team in football. Yes. At their best, they can't be beat.


No. When Trent Williams... I mean, Max actually made a good point. Trent Williams should be in the conversation for MVP.


He's mine.


Yeah. When the 49ers have had Dbo, Samuel, and Trent Williams, and everyone else, they have not lost. I think they might have lost the Browns game with them. I don't think Debo played in that.


Game, actually. I think Trent was in that game and they lost because of a.


Misfield goal. Yes, but they are a juggernaut in every sense of the word. And the Seahawks season is officially spiraled. This is the first four-loss losing streak, four-game losing streak for Pete Carroll. That's pretty impressive that he's gone that long. But yeah, and Jamal Adams' covering in space is one of the funniest things.


I love it. I love seeing Jamal Adams- He looks like us out there. I love seeing him get beat. I love every time he stinks. He's a bad guy. It puts a smile on my face. Bad guy. Yikes.


Yikes. That's what I have to say. Yikes. Play that clip of him just trying to run after Debo.


Yikes. Yikes. Big yikes. Okay, two different levels of bad guy. But you know how we love watching Greg Hardy get his ass kicked? Yeah. Anytime he's- He's not that bad. That's what I'm saying. But it's the same vibe where it's like, I do enjoy watching Jamal Adams not be able to cover anybody. It is pretty good. The 49ers now, Jake, we talked about the bird gauntlet asterisk that you brought up. They've now beaten the Seahawks... It's not the bird gauntlet because they've had the Seahawks, Eagles, then they have Seahawks again, then the Cards, Ravens, no Falcons in there.




There's a chance that they play the Falcons in the playoffs, at which time we will anoint them to be victors of the bird gauntlet. All right. Just to clean up. You can't have the Seahawks in there twice and act like you've beaten every bird team.


Well, no one ever said every.


Bird team. That's what the bird gauntlet is.


Did we not talk about the Eagles having a gauntlet?


I didn't see-The bird gauntlet is a.


Very specific type of gantlet.


The bird gauntlet is a very specific type of gauntlet.




Okay. Just for the record. But they're off to a good start against their mini gantlet. Yes, they are.


The Niners are really good. The Cowboys and the Niners are the two teams in the NFC now. We should have given the Cowboys more credit. They look really fucking good. They stepped up. This was the big test for them, and they passed.


Actually, do you think that if those two teams played again, it would be closer than the first time? I don't know who would win, but the Cowboys are now in the conversation.


Yes, but the Niners are just way better than every other team outside of the Cowboys, which you're actually, they're way better than the Cowboys, too, because we have one piece of evidence and they were way better than the Cowboys in that game. The Niners are just on a different level. We have to have a conversation, though, PFT, about a good friend, DK.




He's number one in the Diva ranking.


Is he Diva or is he just like the George Pickens' Live Wire?


I think he might be Diva.


He was doing sign language for I can't believe Drew Lock is my quarterback when he slammed his helmet on the bench and broke everything.


I think that answers your question. That DK had to learn sign language because he knew he couldn't speak anymore because everything that came out was Diva. Well, fact check- Again, we love the Diva wide receiver. He's so much fun to watch. He had an awesome touchdown, incredible body control.


But he's a Diva. Yeah, DK learned... Apparently, he learned sign language when he was in college, and then he started relearning over the past two weeks so that he can do touchdown celebrations.


And also, shit.


Talk his quarter. Well, no, I was making a joke about that. But he probably was. When he slammed his helmet, that's what that was American sign language for. But he did do sign language again after he scored touchdown. I don't know what he said. I saw a tweet that said he spelled out my dog's name is Wolf. I don't know if that was a typo. Can you do? What is it called? If you slur your words doing sign language. I don't know. He might have had a typo, but apparently that's what he said, or it might have been a tweet that I misread. But yeah, that's a touchdown celebration. It's just, okay, I'm going to make Roger Goodell go to his Decatur ring and figure out if he has to find me for anything that I said.


I think the Diva wide receiver rankings are as much as DK, Metcalfe 1, Stephan Diggs two.


Diggs is definitely up there.


Yeah, for sure. He's a clear two. It goes back and forth each week.


I would say DK more of a Diva. Diggs might be Malkington. He might be a Malkington.


He's border lines. Both of them have the thing where it's like they're so, so good. But at least once or twice a game, you're like, it doesn't feel like they want to be here.


Yeah. Odell used to have that, but I don't think he has anymore.


I don't think he's good enough to be a Diva anymore. Today was pretty good. He was very good today. But I'm saying you have to be a clear head and shoulders number one. Odell was that for a lot of his career. Now he's more of a piece of a puzzle.


Yeah. Tk, he's definitely in the.


Conference room. Again, we like the DivaWide receiver. It's a.


Lost art. I think it's a combination with DK, though, that you don't get with a lot of other DivaWide receivers where he is a Diva, but he's also like a really fucking pissed-off Diva to the point where he's a physical Diva. He'll take it out on the- Did.


He get.


Kicked out today? No, but he had a couple of plays that were close to the edge. That's what I like about him is his divitude- He did get kicked out.


He did get kicked out. Yeah, I.


Thought he did. He got booted? Yeah. I missed that. His divitude goes up against the other team as much as it does against his own team sometimes. Correct. Which if you're going to be a Diva, that's the way to do it.


Yeah, the Seahawks are in big time trouble. They're not good right now. And Devon Witherspoon got hurt. They are playing next week, fortunately. What was this? That 103rd out of 106 teams that started 10-0. They have a chance.




They have a chance next week. They do. That'd be a good game. Is that a primetime game?


I don't know.


Is that a primetime game? Seahawks, Eagles?


I don't believe so. No, it is. It got flexed on Monday night.


Oh, yeah. You should stream that.


That was flex of the ear. Come on. Come on.


Mondays. Mondays are sacred. You don't watch football on Mondays.


I watch Eagles.


It's max time. Actually, that's always a treat, though, when you do get a standalone game that you don't have to stream.


Yeah, and you don't have to work after.


That's pretty good. Max, I actually give you permission to get hammered drunk during that game. Yeah. As long as even if you're losing, Max, if you're losing, you still have to do your videos. Yeah.


Can I come?


Yeah. No, Hank can come. No.


No, Hank, you should. You're a producer, right? I am. You can produce Max that night. Yeah.


What does that even mean?


He's going to produce you. You're going to produce. This is so hard.


He's going to produce. The Niners only last real test is going to be the Ravens. I think that's Monday Night Football. Oh, no, it's actually Christmas Day. It's Christmas Day night.


I love that.


Yeah. Which by the way, we will have a show on that. I'm going to repeat it a bunch of times because I don't want people to be like, Why didn't you tell us? This is my first time telling you. Christmas week, we're going to have a show on Tuesday because we're not going to record Christmas Eve, we're going to have a show on Tuesday recapping everything from the weekend. A show on Friday, getting ready for the next weekend. Then same thing for the week of New Year's. We're going to do a show on Tuesday. We'll record Monday night after the playoff games, college football, and another show Friday.


Here on Monday night.


Yeah. It's a little bit of a funky schedule. It's so stupid. They should never allow Christmas and New Year's on a Monday.




Agree with that. That should be illegal.


Best time is when it's on, I think, a Thursday.


Yeah, because you get that bonus.


You get the bonus bump.


Yeah, you get the bonus time.


Does anybody call DK Mikae yet? We could. Once Peter King starts calling him Mikae Metcalfe, that's when you're.


Really a diva. I totally understand DK's frustration. The Seahawks of... What were they? Six and two? No, they were six and three. Six and three. Six and three. You talked me out of betting them to win the NFC West. Thank God, because they have fallen off a cliff.


Now, that being said, I wouldn't be shocked if they beat the Eagles.


No, everyone can beat the Eagles right now.


Yeah, they're one of what? Was that, was.


That a 100-106? They're a 103 out of 106.


Okay, yeah.


The Seahawks could beat them. One of those teams had to have been that Steeler's team.


Oh, for sure.


Yeah. Okay, wrapping up. Two more games. Broncos, 24, Chargers, seven. The Broncos, they probably will make the playoffs. I feel like they're going to make the playoffs. They're playing some good ball. The Chargers are just a debacle. I guess they're just not going to fire Brandon Staley now because they're just going to wait till after the season. But Justin Herbert got hurt. When he was in, it wasn't good. Yeah, they were bad. We talked about it on Friday. The Chargers have no offense. They're getting by on just total member of the Chargers last year, the year before when they had offensive explosion everywhere. Keane Allen is it. Austin Hecler looks slow.


As fuck. He's slow. He get up to 13 miles per hour the.


Other week. Yeah. Justin Herbert was in before he broke his finger. He was 9 for 17 for 96 yards in interception. I assume he's out for a while. He's got a broken finger on his throwing hand. Yeah, shut him down. He's breaking all his hands.


Yeah. Just shut him down. Wait for a new coach to come in and see if you can fix him.


Yeah, East.


And Stick. East and Stick played. That's pretty much all you need to know about the Chargers today. The Broncos, this was a take care business game. Yeah. Take care of business.


And Corlin Sutton was really.


Fucking good. I'm going to say something that might be reckless.


Oh, man.


Should I say it? Do you.


Know what I'm going to say? I know what you're going to say.




You know what I'm going to say?


I looked at the schedule. Yeah, so did I. The Broncos can still win the AFC West if Mike Pence has the courage.


They're one game out.


They're one game out. There's a world where they only lose one of the remaining games. They could run the table.


The problem is the chief's.


Schedule is pretty easy.


The chiefs play the Patriots, Raiders, Bangles, Chargers. Jake Browning, though, he's going to whoop that ass.


Yeah, I looked at the Bangles. I thought maybe that's their loss. Maybe this is the Patriots opportunity to play spoiler, Hank, for old times.


They got two chances. They're playing the Broncos as well. They could spoil both.


Of them. Spoil somebody? All right, so I don't think that they're going to win that division. I think it's still the Chiefs were not going to fall into the trap. I just fell into the trap of saying maybe the Chiefs won't win. The Chiefs are still going to win that division, but the Broncos are going to make the playoffs, and they're good. They're really good. They're just a good team, period. They're not a great team. They're a good team. Way better. Sean Payton right now, I guess he was right not trading away his players. That ass kicking from the Dolphins probably had a lot to do with it.


Wait, breaking news. Sorry. Hank's comedy set just ended.


Oh, wow. Oh, that wasn't that bad.


That was a long time. It was a.


Long time. Here's what you.


Can do.


That was a long time, dude. If you want to do a comedy show that lasts an hour, just ask Max a bunch of questions about the Eagles. A little pro tip.


We might allow you to have Max as a prop.


As a plant in the audience.


Yeah, as a prop. You can cut him in half.


Or if they're in the Super Bowl at that time.


No, they're not crazy.


With the Eagles? Yeah, come on.


Yeah, the Broncos, they're still alive to win the AFC West. It's crazy.


They're alive. It wouldn't be the craziest thing in the world if it happened. It's probably not going to happen. But the fact that we're having that conversation.


It'd be pretty crazy.


It'd be pretty nuts. Yeah.


Especially considering how bad they looked in September.


They looked real bad. Real bad. They were maybe the worst team in football. Yeah.


Now Russell Wilson, maybe he's still not great, but they're winning.


He's good.


Our friend Mark Slareth, ripped him a new one the other day.


About what?


Just the Russell Wilson stuff. He's running into sacks. He's doing check-downs, not looking down the field. Like, his stats can look good, but if you're watching the game, there's so many plays that he's leaving on the table.




Is fair, fair points.


You might be leaving a few plays on the table. But considering what we were looking at earlier this season and last year, it's night and day with Russell Wilson.


Absolutely. Courtland Sutton is really, really good. Jerry Judy, Giovante Williams, they have weapons. They're not a bad team.


Yeah. Is it the quarterbacks coach for the Broncos? I believe it is, is it this guy? Davis Webb. You remember Davis Webb? Yeah, of course. I think he's the quarterback coach or often I think he's QB coach. He looks way more disheveled than I thought that he would look. Really? For some reason, I had memory hold Davis Webb as being a clean-cut guy. He's got a little.


Charlie White hurt. Is he Stanford? No. Texas Tech. Texas Tech. I'm thinking of Davis Mills.


Yeah, you're right. Yeah, he's done.


A good job. Well, he's Colorado now.


Yeah. Colorado, David.


He got Colorado. He's got the beard and the long hair. He got Colorado.


Whatever they're doing with Davis Webb and Sean Payton out there, good job. I'm going to put them in my personal Coach of the Year rankings.


Yes. All right, last game. Bill's 20, Chief's 17. What a game. Not the best played game. Both quarterbacks were not playing elite level. It wasn't like the divisional round we saw, whatever it was, three or four years ago, 13-second games. But the Bulls playoff hopes stay alive. We talked about it on Friday. They were 35-1 to win the Super Bowl. They went down to 18-1. The big story from this game, though, is Patrick Mahom's complaining about Cedarius Tony being off sides in what was one of the coolest plays ever because he threw it to Travis Kelsey, who then threw it backwards. A perfect spiral to Cedarius Tony who scored a touchdown, flagged, called it back. Cedarius Tony was standing off sides to start the play. Patrick Mahomes, I don't remember a time when he's been like this after a game.


No, and the handshake with Josh Allen. Jake is probably heated about that. Yeah, very bad sportsmanship. The Handshake was bad sportsmanship. He was complaining about the play. If you saw, listen, I know that there's a lot of times in an NFL game where there are subjective calls and a lot of times when you're lining up as a receiver, they give you the benefit of the doubt. I don't think I've ever seen an offensive player more offside than Cadearius Tony was. He was in the pool report after the game where they asked Carl Cheffers, great referee name, by the way, Carl Cheffers, they asked him about the call. He said, Yeah, sometimes we do give a little bit of leeway, but if our lineman can't actually see the ball because your player is so far off sides, if it's that blatant, we will throw a flag 10 times out of 10.


Also, it's so funny because all the Andy Reed complained, Patrick Holmes complained, noticed that none of them are saying he wasn't off sides? Yeah, he was very- Their complaint is that you can't call that.


Because it made a cool play less cool, which in theory, I understand that because I always think that if a play is cool enough, they should just throw away whatever penalty flag is on the field. But if you're a player, you have to understand, yeah, they threw the flag at the start of the play because your guy was very, very off-side.


Well, and if you go under the same reasoning that it was technically a penalty, but in this time and place, you can't call a ticky-tack call like that. Well, unfortunately for the Chiefs, they've just lost their Super Bowl from last year.


That's very true.


That's the part that's like, Pat, my homes, I love you. You're great. You're the best quarterback in the world. But you do have to realize that if you're going to make this complaint, you open yourself up to literally the play that ended the Super Bowl last year.


He did say that last week, I like to see the boys when they got hosed on that interference. He built up a little bit of credit with the refs by being like, I'm not going to complain about a blown call today. But then a week from now, I'm going to reverse on that entirely. Also, what the Holmes is asking for here, I'm not a very smart man. I don't understand physics that well. I don't understand anything about the universe or the time space continuum. But I do know that he was asking for a flag that was thrown. He says that they should not have thrown a flag at the start of the play because the end of the play that happened afterwards was way cooler. Right. Unfortunately for Patrick Mahom is the way time works is that they threw the flag and then the play happened.


Here's another part of this. I would normally agree with him if it's like, Hey, look, this is... The ref is usually talking to the wide receivers. There is an ongoing dialog of, Hey, you got to back up. You're not on the side. This does happen. We see in football. But the NFL did make a point of doing this year. In 2021, this exact penalty was called one time. Last year, this exact penalty was called two times. I remember one of those. This year, this penalty was called 11 times so far. That's just coaching in Cedarius Tony. It's clear they've made it a point of emphasis. It's clear they're going to call it more. You can't then be like, We never saw this coming. You never call it. No, they do call it this year. They have called it this year. They've told everyone they're going to call it this year. What they do, they called it. Again, it just goes back to... Mohomes and Andy Reed are not saying he was not off sides. They're admitting that he was off sides.


But you can't call it there.


Right, but you can't call it. Then if we do the you can't call it there, we just go right back to James.




Which was a penalty. It was, James Bradbury said that. But the argument that everyone said is you can't call it there. It's the biggest moment in the Super Bowl. But you just fell into a trap. He mouse-trapped himself.


Also, as Caderius Tony doing this? Cederius Tony is shit for brains. He's now cost you two games personally at wide receive, which is very hard to do to say that one player is directly responsible for two losses. With Tony, I don't think that you can even make the argument that it is. He definitely is. It was a great play, though. Shout out to Travis Kelsey. That play is open probably 10 times a game downfield. If you have your guy running in the right place and the person with the ball being on the lookout for it because of how the defense on the ball carrier, they're not worried about anybody else on the field. That plays open all the time. That's what I've been saying for the last seven years on the show. Travis Kelsie's got balls to throw that. It was an awesome throw. My homes after the game said, It's tough to swallow, not only from me and football in general, to take away greatness like that. For a guy to make a play like that, you want to see the guys on the field decide the game. I hope they still show it whenever he goes into the Hall of Fame because that's a legendary moment that we don't really get to witness.


I'm going to say probably they're probably not going to.


I think they should. I don't think they will. It was that good. Look at you emotional, my homes. Homes very emotional.


Here's also just an idea. Again, we're not criticized. He's the best quarterback in the NFL. But maybe instead of yelling at the ref, you should yell at your receivers because they're dog shit real bad. Outside of Rasheed Rice, they just drop balls and fumble balls. The Chiefs are broken offensively.


I think you need to realize that Cedarius Tony is maybe, probably, definitely better off not being on the field. Although he did score the touchdown from Travis Kelcey.


That's going to be in the.


Hall of Fame. That's going to be in the Hall of Fame.




Had a Hall of Fame catch on that one. Yeah.


Other things in this game. Tony Romo called Taylor Swift, Travis, Kelsey's wife.


Yeah. Interesting, Tony. My theory on that was that Tony's got a thing for Taylor Swift, and he called her his wife so that she'd have to be like, No, I'm not actually his wife. And he was like, Oh, really?


You're not. Oh, so you're single.




So you're technically single.


Oh, speaking of that, I put you guys on Jeff Darlington, Taylor Swift Watch the other night. When Jeff was sitting outside Lambo Field, Taylor rolls up. He takes a video of her going in. She turns back and looks at him. Today, she drives by in the golf cart. She gives him a cute little wave. I think Taylor Swift has a thing for Jeff Darlington. I think that we've seen.


It up now. He's taken by the NFL.


By the game. By his.


Love for football. Taylor Swift also had just looking so fierce walking in the tunnel beforehand. That's it. Swift. Swift. Swifties now have to deal with losing football games, which is so funny because they just hopped on and they're like, Chiefs always win.




Swifty's are going to hate- We watched them kill the bears. We watched them beat the jets.


They're going to hate.


Cedarius, Tony. Yeah, and just losing football games sucks. Welcome to our world. Losing sucks. Sunday nights usually suck. It sucks for you now. Yeah, the Chiefs are in trouble. Then the Bills, I mean, Josh Allen was doing all the Josh Allen things today, just mashing all the buttons. I don't know why the Bills don't feature James Cook more. He's so electric. Every time he touches the ball. The first half, he was dominating.


That seam pass that he caught? Yeah. I feel like that's always open. The running back taking the seam like that.


Then he had won a wheel route, too, which was awesome. The Bills are still alive. They got to beat the Cowboys next week because they don't have a margin for error. It does get a little easier because I think they play the Patriots and the Chargers who might not have Justin Herbert. But this is another must-win next week. It's backs.


Against the wall time for Buffalo.


Yeah. I mean, it's actually not a bad spot for them because the Cowboys are coming off a huge win against the Eagles at home Sunday Night football. Now they have to go to Buffalo. You got to hope it's cold.


Do you think there's any chance that McDermott was playing 10-dimensional chess, waiting for this story to break?


He leaked it to Tidon.


At the right time so that he could be like, Nobody believes in us. It's us against the world. Everyone's coming after your coach for saying that the 9/11 hijackers did a good job. It's time to circle the wagons and to go on a run here. I'm just saying backs against the wall. Yeah. Maybe a genius move by Sean McDermott- Maybe a genius move. -comparing Al Qaeda-.


Listen, I still bet them 35-1, even after I was momentarily deterred by you breaking that news to me on Friday. But yeah, I still think it's still going to be very hard for them to make the playoffs. But if they get there, given what's happened in the AFC in terms of injuries and the flaws teams have looked like, they are just as live as anyone else if they get.


Into the dance. Yeah, the point is you'd rather suck out loud for most of the year than have a star player get hurt early on in the season.


Right. The Bulls defense is not playing better. I couldn't believe Van Miller was playing, but he is.


Yeah, he's battling back, too.




Back. He's out there.


Yeah, he's out there.


I saw Andy Reed complaining that he was offside.


He was. He was offside. I saw another breakdown from Mitchell Schwartz, we're the guest, Parallax Effect. We got Parallax Effect. He was actually on side.


Because I saw the dots and he looked offside.




The dots? Yeah, on the dots, he looked very offside.


You were on Bezos Vision. I saw the dots. Okay, well.


According-nate Tice tweeted out the dots and he.


Was offside. According to the Parallax Effect, Per Mitchell Schwartz, he was onside.


Chiefs fans, you have to deal with this. I don't think anyone feels bad for you.


No. There's no one who feels bad. Not really. You get to root for the Chiefs. That's awesome.


Yeah, you get to root for Patrick from Home for another decade plus. You had a couple of losses that maybe had referees on the wrong side. It's also worked out for you, again, in the past. You can't be upset.


You can be upset. You can be upset. You're definitely allowed to.


Be upset. You can be upset.


But just- I mean, they won the Super Bowl and all nonsense.


Right. You could be upset. Just know that if you bring it up, you're going to get the response of James Bradford.


Hank, you also went to the Super Bowl on a- Frank Clark. -nonsense. Frank Clark Offside.


He was offsides in that play.


They called it. Yeah, but in a moment like that-.


Can't call it. -you lose.


Both sides. Can't call it. The refs need to have a better sense of the moment.


That's all I'm asking. Last two minutes, there should just be no penalties. Let the boys play. Let the boys maul each other.


I like that. It's like in hockey, when they go to playoffs, like in the overtime periods and the playoffs, the refs just swallow the whistle. Let them run out there.


Yeah, just let them go. Let them go. Okay. That was a great game, though. It wasn't the best played game, like I said. It feels like they're both those defenses have figured out the offense. Because when they play, it doesn't feel like it's the shootout that we had in that.


Playoff game. It was still a history game, just because you have all that history between those.


Two quarterbacks. You do have history. I don't know what it is, but the Bills have never played the Chiefs at home.




They just always are a narrowhead. It just always works that way. Now we might get Patrick from Holmes the real question about his career. Can he win a road playoff game?


I want to find out.


I want to find out, too. I think I saw that nerd, Steve Karnackie, said they have a 9% chance to get the one seed now.




The Dolphins and Ravens play each other, so that helps them.


We'll see what happens. We'll see what happens. But at the end of the day, in the playoffs, I'm probably still going to be betting on Patrick Mohhams, no matter who he's playing against.


All right, let's do our overly direct take presented by Direct TV. Direct TV is the ultimate destination for pro football. It's where fans can get their football fixed this season. Whether you're watching games live on TV or streaming app, DirecTV has you covered and you can get DirecTV without a satellite. Get a $400 reward card with a 24-month DirecTV package and receipt of 23-24 NFL Sunday ticket from YouTube. Offer not endorsed or associated details at directv. Com. Go right now, directv. Com. Let's do our overly direct take of the weekend. Hank.


My overly direct take of the weekend is that the Eagles are going to lose the first round of the playoffs.


Oh, Hank. Now, Hank, you wouldn't have just said that because you didn't have an overly direct take and you wanted to say something that would make Max angry, would you?


No, I've been thinking about it. I was watching the defense. Defense wins championships. Yeah. The Eagles's defense doesn't exist, really.


What do you grade that overly direct take, Max, as you always do?


It's a hot take.


It's overly direct? Yeah. Pft, what's your.


Overly direct take? My overly direct take is that the New England Patriots are eliminated from the takesoffs. Oh.


Now, PFT, you didn't come over with that.


That's my take.


You didn't come over that take. You didn't come over that overly direct take because that was texted to us.


No, I would never come up with it because it was texted to us. I just don't think that the Patriots are any good.


Fact or take?


Fact. Both.


That is a fact. Yeah, I think it's both, too. It's both.


I have an overly direct take that is not just off the top of my head. It's something that I've actually been thinking about for the last two days because I was lucky enough to attend the Army-Navy game on Saturday at Foxborough, and I got to see the Lighthouse in person.


In Foxborough.


In Foxborough, what did I say?




Foxborough. Okay, and I got to see the Lighthouse in person. My overly direct take is there's never been anyone who's been more wrong about anything ever in the world than Henry Lockwood about this Lighthouse. It doesn't even have a top to it.


It doesn't have a top. What are you.


Talking about? It doesn't have a real top.


To it. So it.


Can get right-Where do you think people stand?


The Lighthouse, you got to have the top to it. There's no top. It's got to have a top.


What the.


Fuck are you talking about? -it just, there's no top. A Lighthouse has.


To have a light.


No, a Lighthouse, it has like a guardrail around the outside.


It has this. All Lighthouses have this top where it gets really skinny at the top. It doesn't have the top. It's the same fucking length the whole time. Look, see, that's what a Lighthouse looks like. You get the head and the penis. It doesn't have it. It's all shaft.


It's uncircumcised.


Hank's never been more wrong about anything. That's my overly direct take.


I did have probably hundreds of people send me pictures of the Lighthouse this weekend. Yeah.


I think it's worse. It looks bad. I'll say this. It's a lot smaller in person than I thought.


It would be.


A lot smaller in person.


You would never say that.


About Cape Attariff. You'd be real disappointed if you went to Cape Attariff then.


Cape Attariff is beautiful. It's a great Lighthouse.


Jake, what's your overly direct take?


My overly direct take brought to you by Direct TV is that the textans, excuse me, the Broncos, Bangles, and Bills are all out of the playoffs right now. They're all going to be the wildcard teams in the AFC.


Broncos, Bangles, Bills.


Yes, they're going to overtake the Browns.


The Sears, and Cols. The Browns are not going to make the playoffs.






Disagree. I disagree as well.


I think a few weeks ago, my overly direct take was that Joe Flacko is going to take them.


To the playoff? Yeah. Oh, Jake.


Oh, conflicting overly direct take.


Before we sat down to record the show, Jake said, I am fired up about sportsmanship. Yes. I'm going to give you 10 seconds to be fired up about sportsmanship starting now.


I understand in the heat of the moment that Patrick Mohomes was upset, but he should not have expressed that while he's doing the handshake with Josh Allen.




There's 10 seconds.


That's a.


Tight 10. Seconds. Yeah. Yeah.


I think he should have just been like, Go to the game. Then he could have complained. That's sportsmanship. But not saying it to him.


Max, what's your overly direct take?


Bronnie James will win NBA finals before the Patriots make the playoffs again.


Oh! Brownie James played in his first game at USC today and he's going to make the NBA? He lost his -1,000 favorites.


He scored.


Four points. Over time, the Long Beach state.


Yeah, but you know, Brown is going to make them draft him.


Before the Patriots make the playoffs? Yeah. Why?






Now, Max, this isn't because you're a leery animal.


Right now. He's not going to hit the NBA because he's a bronze son. He's not going to play.


He'll be on a roster.


He'll probably be on LeBron's team. Yeah, but.


By the time that.


Happens, LeBron's going to be wash, washed.


They're not going to make the draft, Brony.


And the patriots.


Fucking stink. They're just going to bring them in for camp and put them as the last.


Guy on the pitch. They're about to have the number one, two, or three.


Pick, dude. No, not one. That's mine. Yeah, I got that. I told you. I fucking put it right next to me when I drive into work every day, put the buckle on. He's fucking pat it on the head like, Hey, there he is. I carried around, put it right next.


To me. Maserati Marv.


I'm sitting down, people come by and like, Hey, what is that? What is that sitting next to you? It's the number one. Baby yoga. Yeah, exactly. That is exactly how I treat the number one pick and walk around. That's cute.


Yeah. And who would throw the ball to Maserati Marv?


Maybe we sign Flacko. Yeah, I'd be smart.


That sounds like a playoff team.


I'd be smart.


If I had to do a will or something, I'd list all my financial assets and I'd include the number one pick. I have this. That's a lot.


I thought you.


Were going to say- More.


Than you have. -you were going to list like your money goes to the number one pick.


I do. It's one of your dependents. I thought you were going to say in case of the death, give all my money to the number one pick. Okay, good job. Overly direct takes. Let's finish up with who's back of the Week is brought to you by ourselves. Pardon my Cheesestake. We've unleashed a menu that will have you mouthwatering in no time. Hold on to your taste receptors because we're introducing the stars of the show, the Chicken, Bacon, Ranch, Cheesestake, the irresistible chicken tenders, and the monumental Big Cat Combo. Whether you're a cheesestake aficionado, a finger food enthusiast, or simply someone who values the art of the comfort cuisine, this menu has something for everyone. Order now on pardonmycheesestake. Com, also available on Uber Eats. People were saying during the 24-hour stream, the chat was trying to get me and PFT to give memes and Evan cash out of our pocket. Here's a little fun fact. Pardon My Cheesestake, we all contribute to it and we all benefit from it. That gets spread around to everyone. If you love the show, if you love the behind the-means, guys. Part of my cheesestake, it's a great meal.


Also, even Max gets a benefit.


I gave him cash out of my pocket. You did? One of us.


Gave him. Was it my cash? It was cash. It was my cash. Okay, it was my cash.


Well, no. Yeah. You gave it to me, which then made it mine.


Okay, true.


Factor fiction, fact. Cash out of my pocket.


Okay, who's back of the week? Brought to you by part of my cheesestank.


Hank, get us going. Speaking of cash. Yeah. He signed with the Dodgers 10 years, 700 mil. He- Deferred. -posted about it on Instagram, which I appreciate. He said, Sorry, it took so long.


The funniest post ever. It was.


Like- It was a picture of he just Googled- Dodgers. -dodgers and probably screenshotted it and even downloaded it, just screenshotted the first picture. It was in 280 P celebrating the biggest contract in sports history.


Baseball history.


Yeah, it is. You got to be careful. He doesn't want to get sued.


It's the biggest contract. I think when I saw a stat he's going to make a million dollars every 20 innings.


Yeah, it's a pretty nice contract for him. I do appreciate the fact that he apologized for making us.


Wait so long. Yeah, that was nice.


Very, very polite. We also had over the weekend, a very funny thing that happened when John Morisey, who's a writer for MLB Network, had reported that Shiohey was on a flight to Toronto from Anaheim. It actually turned out to be Mr. Wonderful. No, it was Robert Herkovich from Shark Tank. Everyone all day was like, Showhey is going to Toronto. It was pretty much the best thing that happened to the Blue Jays since Joe Carter. Then John Morsey had to tweet an apology saying, Today I posted reporting that included inaccurate information that Showhey O'Tanya was traveling to Toronto. I regret the mistake and apologize to baseball fans everywhere. I'm deeply sorry for letting you down. I did not accept his apology.


No. I mean, the people of Toronto should not accept that. No. You had one day where you thought that the next 10 years of your life were going to be awesome. You can't take that away.


That's two years in a row that the biggest free agent signing at Winter Meetings has been misreported. Last year, arson Judge.


Arson Judge, yes.


-going to the giants from John Heyman. And now this year.


Yeah, Showhey though, man, 700 million. I just want to say one thing about I consider myself one of the teams that came second place. A lot of teams came second place in the show, Hey, Sweethearts. I was hoping the Cubs were going to find a way to sign them. I don't think they ever got to that number. The one thing I don't like is when everyone's like, That's a fucking overpay. He's injured. It's like, if the roles were reversed, you would be so over the moon about this. Yes, every contract, free agent contract in MLB history is an overpay because you're paying for past accomplishments. Who cares? There's no salary cap.


It's not your money. Right. It's a very rich person's money. It's the.


One sport.


Also with this contract in particular, they're not just paying for Showhay, they're paying for all the marketing that goes along with Showhay. Yes. All the merch that they're going to sell with Showhay on it. It's an investment in a person in a business sense.


Yeah, that's why I thought it made sense for the Cubs to try to get them. But the one sport that you really can't do the overpay is baseball because there's no salary cap. What are you going to do? Luxury tax?


Okay, who cares? Yeah, they're just upset that their owner has less money. Right.




What you're.


Mad about. Yeah, he's going to be awesome. You know what? When he's like 37 years old, making $70 million a year, it probably won't be a very good contract, just like every baseball contract ever. Rice Harper, Aaron Judge, all these guys, Mike Trout, these contracts will not go well at the end of the deal. That's not what you're paying for. You're paying for the prime of their career.


Yeah. There was a rumor that that Shohay O'Tanya's dog's name was going to give away a clue as to where he was going to sign. I don't know if we know what his dog's name is yet.


No, he did a whole feature and he wouldn't reveal his dog's name.


He won't reveal it.




If it's Tommy? It might be Tommy. Yeah, or Tommy Lasorda. It might be Magic. Might be Magic. Magic the dog. There was a lot of speculation about what his dog's name was. He said that if any team, one of the things was the teams cannot leak to the press what his dog's name is. I love it. Not just like the meetings he was going to where he said that he would look upon those disfavorably. If it leaked out, anybody that leaked out his dog's name was always going to be taken off the list. Love it. Great job, everybody, keeping the dog's name off.


Your lips. Yeah, good job by. Just insane amount of money.


Good for him. $700 million is so much fucking money.


It's so much money.


God, you can never see me again.


And it's worth it. After taxes, it's like 20 million in California. Have you.


Heard that? Have you read.


About that? Have you heard that joke? Man, imagine doing that in California. Shout out to the journalists who are on the O-Tani beat from Japan not having to move to Toronto. I love Toronto, beautiful city, but I think they probably were like, Wait, we have to go to Toronto?


I wouldn't put it past to be like, You know what? I don't want to inconvenience all the reporters that are over here from Japan that have gotten to know Los Angeles so much. I'd like it if they could stay local, too.


Skipp Baylor said that now LeBron is the second star in that city. He takes a back seat to O-Tani because O-Tani moved from Anaheim.


To L. A. Ithat if you put a-I.


Don't think he even moved.


-if you put a Rorshack test in front of Skipp Baylor, no matter what the ink blood is, he's like, LeBron. Yeah, LeBron.


How can I make this about LeBron?




Lebron. All right, your who's back, PFT.


My who's back of the week is Jaden Daniel. Yes, we did it. We did it, guys. Congratulations. Jaden Daniels is your Heisman Trophy winner. There was never really a secondary choice as far as I saw things. We're unbiased. We look at the tape, we look at the stats. He had a historical seat. Actually, no, I'm going to walk that back for a second. I think Marvin Harrison Jr. Would have been very deserving of this award. I want to say that because I realized people might have thought that we've been slighting Marvin Harrison Jr. In the past. In case Marvin Harrison Jr. Is listening to this show, we have nothing but respect for Marvin Harrison Jr. We love Marvin Harrison Jr. Also, you don't get enough credit as a wide receiver and you're a great human being, great person. You're the best Marvin Harrison Senior. Don't hold that against us. But the point is, Jane Daniel is won. He deserved to win.


There was a lot of people complaining because they're like, Oh, his numbers against FCS teams is what made it good. I actually saw a tweet last night against Power Five teams. Jaden Daniels leads the nation in power pass a rating, yards per attempt, total yards per game, total yards, yards per play, QB rush yards, plays at 20 plus yards, big time throw percentage, offensive grade.


Big time throw percentage. That sounds important.


There was one guy I responded to. I don't know if you guys saw, he was saying, Oh, he just had… If it wasn't for the Georgia State game, he would have finished fourth in Heisman voting. This was my response to this guy. You mean when he had eight touchdowns against Georgia State? Why don't you go cry about it, buddy?




Farted in his face. Good. Fuck everyone who didn't think. The only argument I would understand is that if you tell the story of college football of this season, Michael Pennox was the more impactful because Washington being undefeated and all that. But numbers-wise, yeah, Jane Daniels was.


Out of this world good. Also, the jacket Pennex was wearing was awesome.


Yes, it was. The entire suit. His whole family was, I graded them best.


Dress family. The entire suit that he was wearing, it was like velvet, volure, and he had all of his teammates' names printed on the inside of his jacket. That to me, when I saw that, I thought to myself like, Fuck, he's going to win the Heisman Trophy. I wouldn't have been that mad about it because he seems like it's a great story and he seems like a nice guy. But they made the right call.


They made the right call. It was also very funny when Bonics went up and it was like, Bonix with his parents and his wife. I was like, Oh, yeah, Bonix is very old. He's played a lot of college football. That's right. All right, my Who's Back of the Week is the Los Angeles Lakers, raising another banner.




The in-season tournament concluded with the Lakers beating the Pacers in Vegas. A couple of thoughts from that game. I do think the in-season tournament was fun. It was something different that got you excited about NBA in a time. When NBA is competing against the NFL and college football, it's a bloodbath. For them to try something new, I'm all for. The other thing was that it's always fun whenever he decides he wants to do it. But Anthony Davis just being like, Oh, tonight I'm going to be the best player in the entire world.


He was.


Dominant in that first. He had 41, 20, and 5. The Pacers' defense or offense couldn't do anything because he was just everywhere on defense. It was an insane performance from Anthony Davis. When he's at his peak, he is... Yeah, Jokic and Giannis, but he's up there. When he wants to be like, I'm going to do everything offense and defense. He's one of the best players, top three players in the NBA.


Also credit to the NBA for timing this exactly perfectly. Yeah.


What a great day to-Right after the Heisman.


-have it after the Heisman, have it be the only sport that we're paying attention to at that time. Like if this was baseball trying to figure out an off-season or in-season tournament, they would have it at the... They probably have it on Memorial Day Friday, and that would be the conclusion of the tournament. But it was a perfect time. We're all looking for something to watch. The courts did grow on me a little bit. A little bit. And the lighting. It was mostly the lighting. The lighting.


Felt different. Lebron popping champagne was funny.


It's early December. Also, just a recommendation, the 30 for 30 they did on the 1997 Heisman race was awesome. I watched that right after the Heisman. Then I watched the second half of the M. That really just shows you how much football just dominates. We just wanted to- Then I was like, Oh, this is just a time machine to 1997 College football? Yeah, I could watch the second half of the in-season tournament later.


Oh, I'll watch a recap of the 2007 College football season any time it's on. Whenever the algorithm just pops it up, I surrender. Okay, you've got my attention.


Also shout out Army Navy, maybe the most thrilling over that's ever been hit in the history of gambling. I'll remember that for the rest of my life. It was safety to hit over 27 and a half.


I had the army, and so that was big.


It was just incredible. Those are the ones that you remember on your deathbed. People are like, Oh, you're not going to remember these games. No, I will remember the Army-Navy over in 2023 with a safety out of the back of the end zone.


I was screaming for it. As soon as they got the ball. It was a correct play. -everywhere. Yeah, it was like, You got to go for the safety. Take this.


The minute Navy got stopped, my brain immediately flipped over. I was like, Wait, there's three seconds. They have to take a safety. They have to take a safety. Yeah, that was awesome. It was a good Saturday and that and going right into Jane Daniels. All right, Jake, finish us off. My Who's.


Back of the Week is pooping in closets at stadiums. Yes. Because the Bear's fan did just that. Today at soldier field.


Yeah. When you got to go, you.


Got to go. Real meta genius. Yeah.


Speaking of, I got to go.


Oh, okay. I'm going to go poop.


Shout out dinner.


All right. Ordered on the breads. What number do you want, Jake? Shout out, Jack. 18. Okay. Good show, boys. Max, any last words about... You really don't like the cowboys, Max.


I don't like Hank.


I like this. I told you everything we just went through. I told you everything we just went through? I told you everything we just went through? That it's rare that we're not in the the ire of Max because usually we're the ones pushing the troll. But Hank went.


Full cowboy. You can never take away what we went through last week, Max.


Where did you go last week? Oh, the 24 hours. Well, no, I mean, it was 23 hours and also you slept while Max stayed up. It was fun times.


It was fun. I had a blast. I love Max.


How late did you guys sleep in on Friday?


Oh, yeah. I had to do the fucking dozen first thing in.


The morning. That's mean by Jeff.


Yeah, my brain was, not that it's ever firing, but it was blank. Then I went back to sleep. Then I woke up at 1:00 or 2:00.


When did you sleep till, Max?


I slept till 11:00, and then I made breakfast, and then just felt back asleep at noon until 4:45.




Love that. I love it. It must have felt so good. Waking up.




You still- Still a little off. Still a little off?


My sleep schedule is fucked. I slept until noon, both the last two days.


Tomorrow could be an issue. I'm so.


Jealous of that. What about you, Mims?


Slept till 10.


Woke up, did some work stuff, went right back to bed, then woke up at like 3:00.


Did some more work stuff, then went back to bed.


Until the.


Next day.


What times did you go back to bed? On Friday.


It was.


Around like 5:00, and I just slept through it. That's amazing. You time traveled. Yeah. I've been having a bad Dejavous, too. Yeah. All right, we got Stove on Wednesday. Stove-y, baby. All right, numbers-40. -71.




What did you say? Three, 99.


No, he already picked 18.


Oh, Jake took it? Yeah, he took it. Damn it. All right, eight.


Twenty. What was that? Who's laughing?


Pug says Pug after every word.


Pug. 99, Pug. Shane, what do you? 10. 81. No wait. Wait, is that 18?




It's 81. Are you sure? -that's 81. Yeah. How do we know? It's not the same time.


As I thought.


Yeah, it's 81. That is 81.


Yeah, because of the bottom line. You should tell Jake, You know? Because you already know everything? I don't think they do. That sucks.


Love you guys.




throwing it away.


Learn and learn that life is okay.


Say after me. It's no.


Better to be safe and sorry. It's the better to be safe and sorry. It's the better to be safe and sorry. It's the better to be safe and sorry. It's the better to be safe and sorry.


Take on me. Take me on. I'll be gone. You're not.


Doing what you're doing.


Things that you say, they get you in a lot of way.


Just the.


Way my love is away. And all the.




I've got to remember.


Meh shying away.


I'll be coming for.


You anyway. I'll be.


Coming for you anyway. I'll be coming for you anyway.


Take on me. Take me up. I'll be gone in a deep...