Hey, pardon my take, listeners. You can find every episode on Apple podcasts spotify or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon music to be great, college ball players give a hundred percent hundred percent grit, determination and perseverance to be a great snack. Cheese gives a hundred percent real cheese crunch and satisfaction. Real cheese baked into every crunchy cracker. This college football season, we are feeling the cheesiest with cheese. It fuel your game day hunger with bold cheesy crunchy satisfaction. On today's part of my take, we have a very special guest. It is Sam Schwarzenee. You probably don't recognize the name, but it is a phenomenal interview. It's a must listen interview. Sam is a friend of ours, been a friend of ours for many years. He does Amazon Prime Vision on Thursday Night Football. He played at Stanford for Coach Harbaugh with Andrew Luck. He's got great harbaugh stories. He's got great football intellect. You're going to get smarter listening to this interview. We're then going to do or sorry, before that, we're going to do our Week ten preview. You're going to get dumber listening to our week ten preview for sure because we have not slept in like three days with the opening of the new Chicago office.

Everything we've had going on this week. So. Yes. Specifically the Raiders, jets and Patriots. Colts previews. You will get dumber, but hopefully you'll laugh. We're going to talk about Thursday Night Football, whatever the hell we just watched, and then fire fest of the week, great Friday show sending into a great football weekend. It's brought to you by our friends at proper number twelve, rich and smooth, proper number twelve Irish whiskey. New, smooth to the core. Proper number. Twelve Irish apple. New, crisp and fresh. Proper number. Twelve Irish apple. Founded by Conor McGregor. For every bottle sold, donation is made to support our brave first responders. Shoot your shot of proper number twelve Irish whiskey. Pour the roar, order your bottle of proper number twelve Irish whiskey from Drizzly. Today I've been drinking it all college football season. When we're on the road, proper number twelve is the most delicious whiskey and the new Irish apple is perfect for a tailgate fall season. Maybe sitting outside with a crackling fire watching some football. Proper number twelve, it's whiskey season so go check it out now shoot your shot of proper number twelve Irish whiskey. And again every bottle sold a donation is made to support our brave first responders.

Pour the roar, order your bottle of proper number twelve Irish whiskey from Drizzly. Okay, let's go, boy. Now in the street there is violence and then a lot of work to be done no place to hang out or washing and then I can't name all on the sun oh, no, we got a rock down to electric Avenue and then we'll take it higher. Oh, we got a rock down to Electric.

It's part of my take isn't about martial sports.

Welcome to part of my take. Today is Friday, November 10, and that was football.

The Carolina Panthers have the first overall pick in the draft.

Yeah, that was football. Ish.

But the Bears are you guys first in the draft.

Now let's pull it up. Yeah. Because the Cardinals obviously haven't played. The Carolina Panthers give the first pick to the Chicago Bears as of right now.

If the season ended today, the Bears.

Now are the fifth pick. The Patriots giants have both leapfrogged. The Bears so updated to the it was the draft bowl where the Bears were playing against the team that they had their first pick. It was sort of football. Bryce Young. Not good. Tyson bajant? Also not good. Not good.

Nobody was good tonight, really. Cairo Santos was good.

Cairo Santos was good. Your punter was Foreman was good. DJ moore had some flashes. And the refs are motherfuckers because we had not only the fake, probably the meanest thing you can do in all football when a kick return happens against your team. And then the graphic shows flag because it's always going to be like, oh, it's coming back. They just never addressed it. They never said it. They never said anything about it. They just went right to the extra point, right to commercial. I sat there being like, you can't do that. I'll never recover from this. And then they did it again where it was a pass interference on DJ Moore, but at first they called it pass interference on the Panthers and the ref was like, whoops, wrong team. Those roller coaster emotions when it comes to flags, you can't recover from those. It's a false flag. We got all the documents right here. Exactly.

Panthers, we learned tonight, are not really built to come from behind. They're not really built to do anything. Now that I think of it, the.

Bears kind of are. The Bears down ten three, definitely built.

To come from behind. They're an aired out team. Bryce Young there's still not a lot to be optimistic about if you're a Carolina Panthers fan. Actually, no, I'm going to change that. We did put them first in our future Misery draft.

Yeah.

I think that there's a chance that David Tepper fires Frank Reich this week.

Micromanager.

It is 10:29 P.m central. The game just ended. David Tepper did not look happy in the booth. They caught him shaking his head. He's a micromanager. He has a pair of brass testicles on his desk. That is a man that will fire somebody for he's fired men for far less than that.

Yeah.

And I would be surprised if Frank Reich lasted the entire season. It looks like things are not trending in the right direction for him when he sent his kicker out at the end of the game, eddie Pinero and the 59 yard field goal ended up about, what, four yards, five yards short.

Yeah, it was true. To like it was right down the middle.

And then Pinero looked over at the side and kind of shrugged, like, what do you want me to do?

What the fuck do you guys want me to do?

You knew how long my field goals were. I told you what my limit was. You sent me out anyways. That seemed like a desperation move by Frank Reich, being like, maybe I'll just kick it farther this time. Frank Reich knew that his kicker wasn't.

Going to make that.

No, he knew, and he still sent him out.

And he probably knew it because Eddie Panero played for the Bears. Probably like, no, I've never made it. I can't do this on Soldier Field.

Not in this stadium.

Yeah. No. Also, that last drive by the Panthers perfectly summed up the game because it was 15 plays, 50 yards. Yeah, that's hard to do.

It was a drive to hard to do.

To get. That means that every first down, you're basically just barely getting a first down, which they did. It took five and a half minutes and yeah, let's just say this, okay? Let's put it all let's reset. Even though I was watching and this was the last time that I was hoping the Bears would win a game this year, because now it is full tank. This was the one game because you want the Panthers to have the worst record so that you can have their number one pick. And I do hope Justin Fields gets back because Tyson bajant nice guy. Nice guy. I'm rooting for him. Cool dad.

He's got a great dad, great dad.

Maybe he'll be the backup for the Bears for a long time. That'd be great, because I am rooting for him. Awesome story. This idea that he's a starter let's just stop that, okay? Let's stop that right now. Which I think most people actually stopped it a couple of weeks ago, but I'm going to stop myself with that right now. Yeah, this was the last time that I was going to be like, I want the Bears to really win this game. Maybe against the packers as well. But let's reset. We got through the shit, okay? Next week we get Ravens, Bengals, that's.

Going to be nice.

And then the Monday Night Football game after that is Chiefs Eagles. Okay, nice. And then we get three games on Thanksgiving, as is tradition, and then we get bonus football on Black Friday. So we got through it okay. We got through the first step of whatever this week ten is going to be.

This is hell week.

This is hell week.

Hell week. And you know what hell Week, you look back on it like ten years after you graduate college, and you're like, Hell Week rocked. Yeah, but when you're in the shit, you think it sucks. But this is football, and we love football, and I would never say anything bad about football.

Yeah.

So that's all I'm going to say about that.

Look at this. Week 13 seahawks Cowboys on Thursday night.

There we go.

That's good.

Things are looking good.

If you're a football fan, then we're going to do Patriots, Steelers. We can't get too far ahead of ourselves.

No, we've got some great games coming up.

Yeah, we do have some great games on Thursday. Week 14 december 7 patriots, Steelers, then Chargers raiders. Well, I'm going to stop doing this. This is going to start bumming me out. All right, we got through it. We got through step one of Hell week. Everyone buckle up. We're going to get through this together. Also, Al Michaels. Good job tonight.

Yeah, it was funny when he said it looks like they're going to try the tush push with Bryce Young, except he doesn't have that much tush to push. Yeah, that was good. Yeah, it's vintage skinny.

Daddy Bajin.

Daddy Bajin.

Daddy Bajin. Got a little horny at the end.

We got a little owl after dark.

Yeah. Daddy bajant. Yeah, that was football. Yeah.

And I love football.

I love football. Okay, that's it. Really? Should we do I put this disclaimer in the beginning, but yeah, this Week Ten preview, buckle up because we take a lot of twists and turns that go off football wherever it goes. I think it actually is some of our best podcasting.

It's the perfect preview to run with Sam because Sam definitely levels it out. The interview with him is awesome, and I just love talking to Sam. He will make you smarter about football.

Yeah.

He'll undo all the brain damage that we do to you in the first part of this.

And everyone, please tweet Sam after and say, great job on part my take. We need you back on. Yeah. Let's boost him up. Okay, let's kick it to ourselves. Week Ten Picks and Preview before we get to our picks and preview of Week Ten, a couple of quick ads. If you're thinking about going to an NFL game this weekend, game Time is the place to get your tickets. You shouldn't have to worry when you're buying tickets to your next big event. Game Time is the fast and easy way to buy tickets for all sports, music, comedy and theaters events near you. So browse through the game time app. You can find zone deals, flash deals, everything. Concerts, playoff games, football, basketball, hockey, comedy, everything. Last minute tickets, flash deals, zone deals, easy to find and buy tickets for every kind of event in your area. I've used it for football. I use it for comedy. I'll probably use it for some music.

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A strong defense, that's a no. Strong deodorant, that's a yes. Pet supplies for Blake and Stella? Yes. A six pack of ABS, definitely no. But a six pack of beer? Uber Eats can get you that. There you have it. Get almost anything for Game Day delivered with Uber eats. Official on demand delivery, partner of the NFL. Alcohol and select markets and 21 plus to order. Product availability may vary by region. See app for details. So we're going to get some Uber Eats this weekend. We're going to get almost anything delivered with Uber Eats. So order now and get it delivered with Uber Eats. Week ten. Week Ten double digits we've reached over the halfway point. You know what that means.

We're just rounding a shape right now.

Yes. And so just a disclaimer for everyone listening at home. You heard us obviously talk about the Bears Panthers to start the show. This is how we do the Friday show. We tape the Week Ten preview in the afternoon, then we watch the game, then we finish the beginning of the show. We have basically been working nonstop this week. We are out of gas. It might get a little loopy.

That's fine, though.

Those are some of the best shows.

That we I wanted I want the disclaimer. So when we say something stupid and everyone's like, you fucking idiots, it's like, listen guys, I think in this room well, no. Hanks sleeps like a baby. Between PFT and I, we're probably sleeping about 4 hours a night the last four days. It's loopy season. PFT, we just had a moment where we thought we had to do an ad. We had taped the ad an hour ago, and he's like, do we have to do that ad now? And we're like, the one we did an hour ago.

I completely forgotten what I did an hour ago. And it took about five minutes worth of our time to do it. Completely in one ear, out the other. My brain's not operating, but I do think that sometimes when we get loopy on the show and we get into our dumbest modes, it somehow makes us smarter. Yes.

I was at a work event till 02:30 a.m. Last night.

You were at the bar.

You live in the dumb zone. Yeah, I'm never sharp.

I'm always loopy.

You were born into we're merely adopting it right now. And it's when we think that we're being really smart that we're actually at our stupidest.

Yes. So week ten, hank is wearing a Cleveland Mac jersey. I wish you'd take that fucking jersey off. But we're going to start. The best way to start Colts at Patriots, Germany. But more importantly, Hank's Lighthouse presentation. All right, Hank, here we go.

I've been waiting all week. I get a lot of feedback from our listeners, which I love. I take all into account. The one thing I got more than anything else is I can't wait for Hank's Lighthouse presentation on Friday. People are setting their clocks to it, and they're excited to tune in.

So, Hank, make sure you turn your clocks back forward. This correct.

Correct. Without further ado. Hank the Lighthouse Presentation All right, cut in here.

What?

What are you talking about?

What are you talking about?

And cut out.

So you don't have the Lighthouse presentation.

I will have it today.

No, I thought the due date was.

I thought we were recording later.

No, no, you didn't.

When do we ever record later?

We don't record. We're recording tonight. No, we are recording later. We said we were going to do it during the Colts Patriots preview because this game stinks and you don't have it ready. So now you have to extend it to next week.

Not tonight.

No. What? It makes no sense to do it.

I thought we're going to add it into this part.

We're going to just do tricks for the audience. They're going to be like, oh, they talked about him not having it. Now he has it. That's a trick. We're not going to trick the audience.

I think you owe our listeners an apology.

Yeah.

Awls. I would like to apologize. I do not have the presentation ready. I don't really have a good excuse.

Scumbag, you got that jersey. You went and bought that jersey. Yeah.

Bought this jersey. I've actually had this for a long time. I just lost a little bit of weight since I got it.

Oh, who's. That a joke. If it happens again, you should get a salt patch. Yeah. Whose expense is that joke at? No, the losing weight jersey. You had it for a long time.

It's a three XL.

Yeah.

A little bit bigger back in the day.

So who are you making fun of right now?

I'm not making fun of anyone. I'm just people are like, why? That jersey is a little bit big on you.

Because it sounds like during your apology, you just instead weight shamed somebody who lent you that jersey.

I'm not weight shaming anyone.

Who lent you that jersey? Eddie. Yeah. Wow. That's fucked.

Eddie's the nicest guy in the eddie.

Is the nicest guy. He gave me this jersey. Look, I wish here.

I wish Eddie was I'm sorry to you guys.

I wish you were back in New Jersey. That's what I wish.

I wish you were swimming with the.

Like, after we finish finish this recording. I'm free for like 6 hours. I was very busy this oh, good.

I'm glad to hear that. You're free for 6 hours after this.

You're not going to watch the game. You're wearing a Bears jersey.

Well, I'll be watching bears.

Like why?

We're going to be done in an hour. The game doesn't start for 3 hours. I'm not going to be on the stream. So I'll be sitting on my computer working.

Oh, Hank doesn't care about the streams when Tiffany's I'm not on the stream.

Oh, pervert. Pervert my take.

Pervert my take. Look, at the end of the day, I am very sorry.

You fucked up.

Actually, it should be called Hard on my Take.

Yeah, you fucked up.

I did fuck up.

So when are we getting the presentation?

It'll be done tonight. I can present it whenever you're ready for it. And I'll do something as next week atonement all.

Right, soul patch.

No. Get a cat, start the lottery. Ball. Slate clean. You never got it. You never got it. No, you never got it.

You know what this is? It's just Hank, like, high stepping and thinking he's the man because he got the lottery correct. He doesn't think he has to do any work. You think you're on top of the world. You've had a week to do this presentation, Hank.

Look, there's some things we have had a busy week, and there's a lot of times where I really get to thank my lucky stars. Sometimes I don't take it for granted, but sometimes I lose sight of how lucky I am to have this job and to work with you guys. We went to a corporate presentation this week and it started, and within two minutes I was like, I wouldn't last a second, dude.

I had the same feeling. I was like, I'll put a bullet in my head if I have to be in a conference room for more than ten minutes.

And then when I start, there's been two times where I sat down. And the thing is, I have the presentation in my head. Like, I know what I want to put on paper, but I sit down and I open pages and I start doing it, and my ADHD kicks in and I'm like, I just think you're on.

Ujiz. I'll do this later.

I'll do this later. I'll do this later. And then later is now the deadline comes and I'm like, I have hat in hand. I'm sorry. So it's really just a long way of saying thank you guys for giving me the opportunity to do this every day.

Stop.

But that meeting you're a professional procrastinator.

It started and legitimately. Two minutes in, I was like, I could not last 1 minute. I didn't have this job. I truly don't know what I'd be.

Doing with yeah, you'd be in a gutter.

I really enjoyed the corporate meeting.

It was a great meeting, but it's hard to I couldn't do that.

Every day I was thinking myself on the other side.

I get it.

I'm doing action items. I'm circling back. I'm putting pins and stuff. I'm loving every second of it.

It wasn't the meeting. It was the physical act of sitting in a room with everyone around being serious, and I was like, I haven't been in a room like this in a long time.

If I was in that corporate life, I would just start every meeting or every sentence with per my email.

Yeah.

It's just such a power.

Let's now circle. Hank, when can we circle back on the lighthouse?

The lighthouse president.

Stop saying tonight.

It will be done. You guys can tell.

No, we will address it on Wednesday.

Okay. Whenever you want.

He's not going to do it.

Absolutely not.

No, he's totally going to get it.

Done tonight, even though it's not due till next week.

As soon as he walks by the golf simulator, it's over.

Yeah, I won't golf until I finish it.

Okay, well, there is a more important storyline that we can get into the colts at the Patriots in Frankfurt, Germany.

I can break this.

Colts are I'll add that to my present. Colts are underdogs at home in Germany. Belichick's leading his guys over there. Both teams are traveling on Thursday after their walkthrough, so there's no travel advantage. Who knows where Belichick's going to be, like, during the night, during the course of the week? He might have some friends houses. He's staying over at big Cat. I don't know if you saw this video.

Colts are not underdogs, by the way.

The patriots are one and a half point underdogs.

They're two point underdogs.

Okay, so it moved this morning. All right. So, big cat, I'm not sure if you've seen this video that's making the rounds of coach Bill Belichick exiting somebody's house at what appears to be, I don't know, 05:36 A.m. In the morning. Shirtless, no, shirt on, doing the walk of shame, easing his way out of the door, making sure not to make too much noise on his way out, presumably staying over at a young lady's house during the night, living his best life.

Hank, when was this video from?

I don't know. It just came out today.

It has to be summertime, right?

The man is shirtless. Who knows where the shirt is?

Oh, my God.

I'll say this about the video. Belichick looks powerful.

Yeah, he does.

He's always had that.

No, he does. He's got the barrel chest, the back dimples, like the lines in his back.

Yeah, he looks like that man can fuck. That's the back of a man that was up all night in pussy.

Wait, is there sound of this video? I don't think so, because he definitely ripped a fart.

Oh, that's the first thing you do when you leave.

Yeah. Wait. Oh, man. It looked like he was going to rip fart. He kind of, like, breathed in there. All right.

What if he had done, like, the Steve Belichick on his way out into the camera?

The defensive thing that listen, good for him. Good for him. Parbor might take part. My take is he going to get fired.

He might. Oh, I cannot wait. Listen, I've thought about this over the last couple of days because the Belichick to Chicago, Belichick to Washington, rumors keep increasing by the I want Harbaugh, it seems like, okay, I'll take Belichick, and I'm going to be happy for you to get Harbaugh. I think that'd be good for the show. All around, a lot of people are saying, like, is Belichick the right coach? If you're a team like the Commanders, would you even want a guy that's that old? Probably on the downside of his career, I say yes. I would love Bill Belichick. Not necessarily. I understand the concerns, but strictly for the purposes of this show. To steal Hank's head coach, that would be incredible. For me, personally. I've seen a lot of photoshops of Belichick recently. Are they photoshops?

Are they real?

Where he's wearing Commander he's wearing Commander's gear. I thought one of them was real.

You've commissioned them.

But Hank, if he loses this game, would you like to see him fired?

Absolutely not. That's a crazy question.

Okay. But I think they will lose this game. Yeah, I actually don't, actually. The Patriots might win this game. So two reasons. One, Gardner Minshew's been in the league for a long time, never played Belichick.

Belichick might just not give a fuck.

He might not give a fuck. So that might not that video.

I don't know when the video is from. It probably is from the summer, but.

That is like it looks like a summer video.

That's like a Jersey shore clip.

Yeah. Yeah. Because the house is all next to each other. He's not in Nantucket. He's not in an uh.

He's in, like, Tom.

I also think that this is the one chance that Mac Jones can maybe look good because the Colts defense is bad and Gus Bradley runs the same defense no matter what, all the time.

This should be jones seems like a jet lag.

He's going to be like cranky, crying eyes.

Yeah. Is he allowed to travel overseas with the DUIs? I have a fun stat that means absolutely nothing. I saw someone be like, Bill Belichick. He's three and O international games. So he's good with planning out the travel and stuff. Or he had tom Brady.

Yeah, that's a good point.

Travel doesn't really matter when you have Tom Brady.

Well, what's Bill Belichick's record in Super Bowls?

Big Cat? I don't know. Off the top of my head.

Is it six and three?

Six and 3433.

That's pretty eagles. Yeah, that's pretty good. But he also had Tom Brady in those.

So you don't think the Patriots are going to win? Will you wake up for this game knowing that it's after a Saturday and Hank gets after it?

I will not be participating in any client entertaining activities this weekend, so I will be waking up.

Wow.

What are you doing on Friday?

I don't know.

Probably be here. I'm trying to give my brain a break. We're in the office, full swing. There's a lot of exciting stuff happening, and I would like to get ahead of it for once.

Okay. Kind of like the report that you haven't done. Yeah. One thing.

All right. You guys know me. The listeners probably know me at this point.

No, they know you. They know you too well.

I struggle when I'm overwhelmed. And then you factor in a hangover.

How is a Lighthouse presentation overwhelming?

It's the straw that breaks the camel's back. Anything? I do not do well managing multiple things at once. If there's anything else I have to.

Do you're in charge of this whole office. No, I know, but there's a lot.

Of shit going on, so it's like, do I want to do this presentation, or do I want to focus on something for the office? And I'm always like, all right, well, I got to do this. I got to do this, I got to do this. I need a clear mind. I need to prioritize.

That's what you have to do. Hank, let me ask you a question. If part of my take just ceased to exist, do you think that this office would be here right now?

No.

So maybe the priority is on the Lighthouse presentation.

I thought I was going to be able to sneak it into tonight, and it would be cool. And then once we started the podcast, I realized it's Tyler's mistake, which we.

Start at the same time every Thursday.

No, I know, but I thought this one later.

Yeah, we did.

Sometimes we do stuff and it's like, all right, we'll do it when we record tonight, and you guys are cool. And then once we started, I was like, okay, now this.

Well, because it would be weird, because we'd be like, why are we doing the Lighthouse presentation?

Well, I try to do the cut in, cut out.

Okay. Nerd nugget for this game.

Not only are the Patriots three and O in the NFL's International Series, but they've only let up one touchdown in each of those three games.

Wow.

Okay, so it could be a Tom Brady stat, but also the defense.

I didn't really sorry, Jake, I might have to ask you to repeat that because I. Was like I was just thinking back.

About our preview of the Coltspace. Yeah, it was where the fuck is the lighthouse? Presentation? Belichick fart and where the fuck is the lighthouse? But you know what? That's exactly the preview you need for this game. No one cares about this game.

All right. Sorry, Jay.

Can you repeat?

It like, I'm in high school trying to convince my teachers to give me, like, a passing grade so I can be eligible.

This game stinks.

Yeah, it's tough.

We should do that every week. The worst game on the schedule. Just be like, make sure we don't actually mention anything about the game.

Doghouse game of the week.

Yeah, this game is in my dog house for sure. The fact that it's so early, too.

I'm going to gamecast this game. Just going to watch the updates of scores.

Oh, I'm going to watch in bed.

I'll be up. I might be here.

You're not going to be here at 08:30 a.m. Sunday.

No, you're not going to be.

There's no way I'll leave my apartment at halftime.

Well, that's not yeah, that's different.

So jake nerd nugget.

Yeah.

So in those three wins in the NFL's international series, the Patriots have only let up one touchdown in each of those.

Oh, okay.

Tom Brady has excelled.

Yes.

But the defense has also played well.

Very cool.

Okay. The Colts.

Don't stop anybody. So I think I'm going to take the over and just hope that it happens.

Yeah, I like that. All right, now for a good game, which should have been flexed to Sunday night, hank is off the hot seat. He just let out a big sigh of relief. Niners at Jags. This game is going to be awesome because we're going to find out if the Niners have corrected what has been ailing them, which the bye week came at a good time for them. Debo samuel back. Trent Williams. Maybe back. Kyle Shanahan had a weird press conference where he's like, yeah, he's dealing with his ankle and some other things in his body and yeah. Chase Young first time in the Niners uniform. I think the Niners are going to win this game. I think they're going to look good. Best effort. Defensive coordinator coming down out of the booth.

Yeah.

They need that old school. Demika Ryans was obviously on the sideline pumping people up. They're trying to find that Kyle Shanahan is going to get more involved in the all. I feel like they realize, hey, we're a really good team, but we got to start taking some shit seriously.

There's going to be a lot of Wilkes Booth jokes going on this weekend.

Yeah. Say that. Like, is the person who's going to make the Wilkes no, I already did it in the room with you right now.

I already did it. Something about Wilkes Booth. A play never ends well if Wilkes Booth is involved. The 49 Ers and the Jaguars I'm holding two separate thoughts in my head. One is that the line is very disrespectful to the Jaguars. There are three point underdogs at home being six. And two, it's a little disrespectful, especially considering that the Niners lost three in a row. I'm holding that thought in my head, but the other thought that I have in my head is that the Jaguars might be fraudulent.

Well, so I don't think they're fraudulent.

But well, you got to be consistent, because if you look at their no.

I was going to say it. I was about to say it. So I don't think they're fraudulent, but I also think that you can definitely do the tier system with them, where the last four wins have been the Falcons, the Bills, the Colts, the Saints, and they looked very bad against the Chiefs. And if you ask yourself, are the Niners closer to the Falcons, Bills, Colts, and Saints, or are they closer to the Chiefs? I would say they're closer to the.

Chiefs and the Steelers.

Right. And the Steelers.

Yeah.

I was just saying their last four games oh, yeah.

The Steelers are October 29. Yeah. So their best win of the season was the Bills. We can agree on that. That was in England.

The Bills might stink, and the Bills.

Might stink, and travel was an issue. So to be consistent, we have to say that if they lose this game, we have to call the Jaguars frauds.

The problem is the Dolphins are bigger frauds. Because dolphins lost the bills. Yeah. There's levels to this shit, man.

And the Dolphins blowing out the Broncos and scoring 70 points.

Yeah.

That probably adds to their fraud resume if they blow out a bad team like that. I'm just saying, with the Jaguars, they don't play that many tough opponents this year.

No, I know. I had the same thought where I was just like, wait, the Niners are going to be the closest thing the Jaguars have, or the Niners is the Chiefs, and the Jaguars really struggled in that game. They only scored nine points.

Crisco. That's why.

Yeah, the schedule the schedule is everything.

Schedule is everything.

They play the Bengals, eventually they play the Texans.

Yeah, I'm cool. Put them on fraud watch.

You convince and then the Ravens, and then besides that, I'm just saying we should put them on fraud watch.

I like it.

They haven't done anything to really earn that. It's just that they haven't played anybody.

No, they're on fraud watch.

And if the Niners go into their house and beat them I think we have to talk about it.

If the Niners lose this game, do they go to fraud watch? This might be the Fraud Bowl, but.

I don't think since they've lost so many in a row, I don't know if they're frauds.

They might just be broken.

They're broken.

Yeah, because outside of the Cowboys win, the Niners have only beaten the Steelers rams, Giants and Cardinals. Those are not sorry, steelers fans, like, your team's got a winning record, but.

Yeah, congratulations, you got a winner.

You get it.

I'm okay with doing a Fraud Bowl on this.

Yeah, there's a fraud bowl, but the.

Niners, I think we can say they're broken. Can they put it back together? Yeah, because at one point it felt like they weren't frauds.

Basically, if you beat the Chiefs, you're not frauds.

I agree.

I agree with that. Lions are going to be going to the end of the season being like, we're not frauds.

You beat the Chiefs.

Okay. Nerd nugget. Yeah.

First off, I have a reminder from last week, but the Jags were on a buy to respect Doug Peterson as a head coach.

No. Okay. All right.

We will.

I'll do that. All right, noted.

Six.

Trevor Lawrence, big cat. Do you know how many touchdowns he has this year?

Seven.

He's got nine, which it still isn't that much. No, they don't pass the ball for touchdowns.

CJ. Stroud has 14.

Also this season, the 49 ers offense has gained at least four yards on 56% of their first down plays, most in the league. So that's crazy. More than half the times they're gaining at least four.

That's pretty good.

It's really good.

This is what I struggle with this all the time. PFT, the stats. When you get later in the season because you think you're like, oh, it's still early in the season. No, it's week ten. Yeah. Nine touchdowns in week Ten is not a whole lot.

It's not good.

No. So, yeah, that is a little shocking because you know how that happens where you're like if you ask me, like, yeah, we're still early in the season. Season just started. The league leader is tua with 19. Yeah. If you went just on touchdown passes, he is 20th.

That's how I do my power rankings. Quarterbacks who has the most touchdown passes.

Yeah.

Sometimes you got to go backwards and make the stats be way dumber.

Yeah.

Don't listen to the Sam Schwarzeneggs of the world all the time.

Yeah. Josh Jobs has ten.

Elite.

Elite. Okay. This game is going to be awesome, though. I'm excited. Fraud bowl next game, browns at Ravens. Ravens defense. Two best defenses in the league, maybe. I would say so, actually.

Yeah, I agree.

This division game, always tough. AFC north. I don't know, I think it was a little misleading, the Browns killing the Cardinals because the Cardinals are that bad. They didn't run the ball that great. And so it's been Jedrick Wills week after said they're All Star or whatever. I said they're great offensive lineman. Browns fans corrected me, rightfully so. But now the Browns don't have the two tackles they started the season with because Jack Conklin went out in week one. Now you have weird situation where they're talking about flipping the guys because they have a rookie on the right side. They might move them to the left side. James Hudson, who's going to come in, go to the right side. I think there's going to be a problem for the Browns. I think once you get these couple injuries, the depth issue on the offensive line, if you don't like Jedrick Wills, that's fine. But once you get lower in the depth chart, it's like, well, kind of wish we still had Jedrick Wills.

I agree. The strategy last week with Stefanski was to run the ball as much as possible, average 2.8. They didn't do it well. Yeah. I think one player had like 13 rushes for 2.9 yards per carry. The other guy had like 13 rushes for 2.6 or something like that. They didn't run it effectively. They just did a good amount, enough to keep the Cardinals off the field as much as possible.

And I feel like the Browns like Amari Cooper's been great and that connection looks like they had a couple deep shots. I don't know if the Browns to beat this Ravens defense, I think you have to have multiple weapons that can because I think they can key on Amari Cooper. So I like the Ravens in this game. Also, congratulations to Keaton Mitchell for officially becoming a Raven. You don't have to do that. Roku on Swift says you have to beat the Steelers. I also think there's another way you can be a Raven and that's just be added the injury report randomly. Yeah. So you got a hamstring, one of the guys, it's like, oh, you're now a Raven. You had a great game, but you're also kind of injured.

Soft tissue damage. Yeah, it's Lamar returning to the AFC. He just finished his barnstorming tour.

The NFC.

That he does. And God damn the NFC if Lamar Jackson wasn't a thing. Is that utopia?

Meme?

Yeah, that's what it just. He loves to kick the shit out of the NFC.

The AFC has been kicking the shit out of the NFC overall, too, though.

Oh, really?

Yeah. That's a trend that we're looking like 65% or something. Makes sense.

I love rooting for conferences.

Yeah, it makes sense. I mean, we keep talking about like, who's going to get the 7th seed in the NFC.

Yeah, it does.

A lot of really good teams in the AFC.

So I like the ravens. I think that the Ravens are the best team in football right now. Yeah, I would stake my reputation on that, which is pristine.

Yeah. The Ravens are playing great ball. I think there's just too much I know DTR was the starter last time these two teams played and he's not an NFL starter. So you can kind of throw out that score. But I think the Ravens are just humming right now and they know AFC North is not easy. You can't take people were talking, oh, trap game because Thursday night they play against the Bengals. I don't know. I think the Ravens know that they're now playing for the one like it's kind of shifted know. So you can't take a game off.

I am going to be basing the rest of my season's takes on Deshaun Watson off how he performs in this game. I just want to make that very.

Not fair, but it's fact.

Well, I think it's fair because, well.

The Ravens defense is really fucking the.

Ravens defense is good. And also Deshaun Watson, this feels like he should be healthy at this point. Like fully, fully healthy.

Nerd Nugget the Ravens have allowed just.

Ten points per game at home this season. They've only also allowed two touchdowns from scrimmage at home.

Whoa, whoa. Okay. Next game, texans and Bengals. I'm excited for this game. Jamar Chase most likely out.

That's maybe not the case because I saw that he came out, he was wearing a jersey and pads for practice. T. Higgins, I think he's probably out because he was not dressed for practice.

Yes.

So both are kind of toss ups.

Yeah. And we saw it when Jamar Chase took that when he fell trying to catch that ball. And I think Collins were said right away, he's like, oh, he's not going to be able to walk tomorrow with that back. And that's exactly what happened. So now we have the Texans, the upstart Texans. I think Texans are going to be live in this game.

Yeah. The other thing is Lou anorumo yeah. Defensive coordinator. Coach Lou for the Bengals. Coach Lou, him going up against a rookie quarterback. I think I'm going to go with Coach Lou on this. I do like CJ. Stroud, but I'm going to go with the angry Italian in this game. I was also very impressed with the Bengals home crowd last week against the Bills. The fact that they were able to be organized enough to sit in their sections because they did Tiger Stripe Stadium, where one section was black, one section orange. That shows a lot of discipline. That rock. That's a promising sign for that fan base. So, yeah, I'm going to go with the big angry Italian. Lou amaruno. Lou amaro.

Amarillo.

Rue Amoro.

Listen, I can say this. Big Lou as an Italian father. Sometimes Italians have names.

That.

What? I'm an Italian father.

Father.

Children. My children, listen, are a quarter Italian. I am I have a shirt. It says proud Italian father.

I am 1% Sicilian. So I can say this. Big Lou is going to put them in big trouble.

Big trouble.

Big trouble.

We'll see with T. Higgins. Jamar Chase, I think the Texans, they finally did the thing where, like, oh, CJ. Stroud's really good. Maybe we don't have to run the ball on first down every single time. Maybe we should let him just be a to keep. I think the Bengals are going to win the game. I think the Texans will cover the spread.

If we forget, if we like men and black ourselves and completely ignore the first three weeks of the season. The Bengals are probably right there in the conversation. Best team in the NFL.

Oh, absolutely. Yeah. I did a halftime future on them against the 49 Ers at 22 to one. I was like, they're back. As soon as Joe Burrow ran one time, I was like, they're back. They're back. And they're the scariest team. They've proven it. It's weird because obviously they haven't won a Super Bowl, but I still think they are the scariest team. Like, if you ask the Chiefs, who do you not want to play in the last week of January? It's the Bengals. Absolutely.

Except for that gibroni mayor shout out Travis Kelsey.

Yeah. Okay. Nerd nugget.

Last week, Bengals quarterback Joe Burrow played in his 50th regular season game among all quarterbacks in NFL history. Through 50 games, Burrow is second in completions, first in completion percentage, and fifth in passing yards.

Okay.

He's good at football.

He's one of the best football 50 game players ever.

He's good at football. Okay. Next up, Packers Steelers.

Yuck. I think that this is the week for the Steelers to lose. I think no, I think they're going to outgain their opponent. They might lose. They still might lose.

They might outgain them, but they might.

Outgain the packers this week.

So George Pickens has been doing some stuff on social media. Mike Tomlin had to address it in a press conference. He was asked. He said, It's like a pebble in my shoe. Pebbles in your shoe are very annoying.

Yeah. Was he trying to say it was not a big deal?

Yeah. But I was like, Wait, no. Pebble pebble in your shoe is like, you have to stop and take off your shoe and be like, oh, there's a pebble in my yeah. Yeah.

It's a serious issue.

Yeah.

If untreated it leads to an infection.

Has been like it's like a pee underneath my that what is, uh, the.

Princess and the pea.

Princess and the, uh yeah. George Pickens, I feel like that's not going great.

Yeah. So he unfollowed a lot of his teammates on Instagram. He scrubbed his Instagram of references to the Steelers. Naja Harris had a word with him about it, and they talked. The two of them talked. And then Pickens addressed the media. He said, I don't mix social media and football. I was just clearing out my page, to be honest. It had nothing to do with the I. He might be right, though. If he's calling his teammates out for just posting weak shit on Instagram, you're posting bad content. I'm going to unfollow you.

This is the new excuse. Whenever someone deletes everything and they're like, no, I'm just living my life. It's the new I just got a smoothie, and I don't know how these steroids got in my system excuse. Yeah.

This one is a little bit harder to track, but I think at the end of the day, he's saying, like, kenny Pickens doesn't post fire pics on Instagram.

Right?

Like, when was the last time you cleaned out your Instagram?

Never.

It's been a yeah, but maybe maybe he's just like a social media connoisseur and he just realizes as teammates aren't that great at it. Why am I following this guy just because he's my teammate? No, you want to follow people that you care about. People whose content is fine.

Post better shit.

Yeah, exactly.

Perfect booties LeBron James.

Yeah. Did he post that or he just.

Liked he liked it when he was zero dark, 30 23.

To me, that's an indictment of his teammates. His teammates need to step their Instagram game up a little bit.

Yeah. So the only reason I kind of like the packers in this game is the weakness for the packers is they start insanely slow in every game. We had the stat a couple of weeks ago where they had five straight games where they did not score a first half touchdown. Guess what? The Steelers don't exactly jump on opponents. No.

Kenny pickens is Mr. Fourth Quarter.

They keep it close. I just feel like this is going to be a close game no matter what. I can't see either team winning by more than three. And now that I said that, one of these teams will blow out the.

Other, at the end of the day, it's going to be a good uniform matchup, at least.

Oh, yeah. Jake nerd nugget.

Mike Tomlin has guided the Steelers to a twelve and four record on nine days rest. That's the best winning percentage, second highest in the NFL since 2007.

Any bond days?

What happened with the Best there?

I misread.

Oh, no.

But still really good nine days rest.

Yeah. I mean, did you see Best or do you let's break down this situation.

I'll read what it's on my computer.

Okay.

Max can witness. Mike Tomlin has guided the Steelers to a twelve and four record on nine days rest. Pittsburgh 75% winning percentage under Tomlin on nine days rest is the second highest in the NFL since 2000.

So Best was never in there. No. Damn.

But it's still really good.

You went rogue.

Saw Best. Yeah. You just jumped ahead to Best.

Messed up. It's on me, man.

Sorry. Maybe you can just tag onto Hank's Notes app for the presentation. He didn't come with.

I do like the minibuy, though. I like Tomlin on a minibuy. I like tomlin is a favorite, which is not good, but oh, no, I like their defense a lot. I like the Steelers defense.

The back half of their defense is not the best. Yeah.

Just get TJ home.

Yeah. Okay, let's take a quick break because we have a delivery that just showed up from Shake Shack. Shake Shack is one of our favorite game day meals. And right now they're doing a special promotion. If any player celebrates a touchdown with the Chicken Dance this Sunday. Shake Shack is offering free Chicken Shacks for a week with eligible purchase. Their Chicken Shack is the sleeper of the chicken sandwich game, but it really surpasses the others. It's got crispy white meat, chicken breasts, over lettuce, pickles and buttermilk herb mayo on a toasted potato bun. The potato bun is so good. So tag your favorite NFL player on social media. Try to get them to do a Chicken Dance. If they get the chicken in the end zone this Sunday, the promotion will go through Sunday 1119 and is available at participating Shake Shack locations and on the Shake app website. Enter code chicken dance. When ordering online terms, apply free Chicken Shack available between November twelveTH and November 19 when you spend more than $10, learn more@shakeshack.com and keep your fingers crossed for a Chicken Dance on Sunday, November twelveTH. I already tweeted a bunch of our friends.

I included Kevin White. That was more of a prayer. But someone's got to do a Chicken Dance.

Give the people free chicken.

Take a bite.

Do it.

Take a bite. One bite. What is this?

Oh, what is this?

These are sauces.

Oh, that's out of bounds.

These are sauces.

All right, I'm going to take one bite. Max do the chicken dance.

Do the chicken dance. Max, while we bite. Chicken Dance. Where are you going? Why are you dance? You walked past the cameras. No.

You don't know the chicken dance. Who doesn't know the Chicken dance.

DA DA.

Max.

There you go. Oh, my.

What was that?

Hank okay, back to the show.

I'm going to do an impression. Hank real good.

Okay, next game, Hank's eating his chicken shack. Someone's got to do the Shake Shack chicken. Someone's got to do the chicken dance. Someone's got to do the chicken dance. So do it. Tweet your players. Tweet your favorite players. Let's get it going. Okay, next up, Tennessee at Tampa Bay. We're slogging through. Yeah, slogging through.

Yeah. Coaches really hate benching bad quarterbacks. That's what I'm taking out of this week. Mike Vrabel. I think he cried when he said that he was going to have to bench Ryan Tannehill.

Yeah.

Will Levis kind of forces him on that. Will Levis is good.

He is good.

Will Levis is good.

Some people asked many questions reported by Billy Football.

Yeah, people asked many questions about Will Levis back in March saying, is he too weird and jacked up to be a good NFL quarterback? I think those questions have been put to bed. Anybody who wrote those questions should be executed. Will Levis is just good. He's just really good.

And guess what? The Bucks may really stink. Although I think Vita Vay's back. Jamel Dean got a concussion. You saw their secondary just completely evaporate when he went out against the Texans. This feels like yeah, it's a line in the sand.

Like, I love the Titans. I almost said I liked them. I love the Titans.

This is a line in the sand game. If Tennessee wins, they are thinking, hey, what was a lost season? Let's try to get to the playoffs. If Tim Bay loses this game, it's over. I know it's never over in the NFC South, but they stink. Stink. That would be four or five straight losses. I think five.

This should be the start of tractor sito season.

It should be. Although it's warm weather.

It's mid November, but it's the season.

Yeah.

Tis the season for tractor sito. Get Derek Henry running the football. Will Levis, at the very least. If you're the Titans, you have a lot to look forward to now.

Yes.

You've got a quarterback. I know it's early. It's like he's played one and a half games, basically. Yeah, I've seen enough. Will Levis will be an elite quarterback.

Yes. Okay. Nerd Nugget.

Speaking of Derek Henry, round number alert. He needs 64 rushing yards to become the 30 eigth player in NFL history for 9000 career rushing.

Round number alert.

I love that.

I didn't know we had those. I like that.

Round numbers. Round number, fellas, you see a round number?

Round number alert. Big cat's back at 260.

Booty got me like, four yards on the ground.

Yeah, give me a nice solid, like, 1000, fellas.

10,000. 10,000 gets it going. 10,000 if you hit 10,000, anything.

Yeah, I actually think 100,000 is better than 10,000.

I know, but 10,000 seems attainable. 100,000 seems so, like, obviously money, you'd rather have 100,000, but 10,000, like, things that you did. Like, I've taken 10,000 shots. 100,000 shots. Like, Dude, you got a problem.

10,000 hours, you're an expert.

Yeah, right.

It's a lot of yards.

Remember Malcolm Gladwell wrote an entire book being like, hey, people who practice at something get good at it.

Yeah, it's crazy.

10,000 hours, book over.

I've unlocked a secret. Beethoven played a lot of music before he got good.

Oh, my God, you'll never believe it. Wayne Gretzky played 10,000 hours of hockey and then he was good. It's crazy. Also, maybe I just didn't understand that book. All right. Saints at Vikings.

Did you spend 10,000 hours reading?

I did not.

Okay, well, then you don't get it.

They will. Saints at Vikings. Josh Dobbs learning the players teammates names. Saints. Who the hell are they? What a game.

A lot of questions.

Lot of questions.

I do love Vikings fans shaving off their eyebrows in solidarity with Josh Dobbs. You didn't see that from Cardinals fans. Didn't see that from Jaguars fans, Steelers fans, Browns fans. This feels like a place that could embrace Josh Dobbs. Yeah, I like Josh Dobbs. I read a stat briefly. I did not double check it. So, Jake, maybe you can double check this. Josh Dobbs is the second leading rusher in terms of all NFL quarterbacks.

Whoa.

That's kind of crazy.

Who's number one?

That would be Lamar.

Lamar Jackson.

Lamar jackson is josh Dobbs is also the reigning MVP. He got slimed this week. Oh, that was cool to see. You can't watch Josh Dobbs play quarterback and not be happy. Yeah, he's just like a nice little shot in the arm. I think I would like to see Josh Dobbs get his forever home, stay put. Maybe in Minnesota we'll see if it's a benefit of him learning his players, learning the plays. Kevin O'Connell doesn't have to tell him what routes the receivers are running this week.

I have a dumb thought. Is it actually bad for Josh Dobbs to learn the plays?

Yes.

Too much information.

Yes.

We saw it with the Cardinals. He showed up at the know, like, what, was late summer, had a nice September, maybe learned the offense too well, fell off the yeah, yeah.

No, I think that there's something to go out there. You don't know the guy's names.

You're just playing right. You're just playing backyard football. So at what point maybe it's not this week, but the next week or the week after that, where it's like he actually knows the plays too well.

I think we should start having the question, Big Cat, are the Minnesota Vikings better without Jefferson?

He's not coming back to Justin. What'd? I say we're loopy. We're loopy. Jordan jettis.

Are the Minnesota Vikings better without jettison? Without Justin Jefferson?

No, not even close.

Tell me their win loss record this year, Hank. With and without factor fit. No factorfest.

I don't know what it is.

Well, they've won a lot more games without him, and it's the dumbest question you could possibly ask, but we're going.

To talk about it.

Should they trade him? He's not coming back till he's 100% from his hamstring fair. Yeah, I agree with I also feel like a guy who's that fast. You should wait. Yeah. Because you'll just get hurt again.

Agreed.

So I don't know, I'm kind of feeling the Saints in this game. Stupid, stupid thoughts.

The coin has the saints.

The only reason I like the Saints, it really comes down to the fact that Brian Flores loves to blitz and Derek Carr loves to just dump it off to Alvin Camara. Feels like a perfect marriage between the two. He'll just be like, I'm going to bring an extra rusher, and Derek Carr's gonna be like, oh, good, I wanted to throw it within three yards of the line of scrimmage anyway really quickly. So there he is. Yes, it's set up nicely. Okay, nerd nugget.

First off, PFT, you are correct. Josh dobbs 324 rushing yards. He's right ahead of Jalen Hurts with 316.

But Jalen hurts isn't himself.

He's not himself right now.

So Jalen Hurts from last year would be well ahead.

Yeah. And then Patrick Mahomes is right behind them. All right, so last week, Saints quarterback tight end Taysom Hill recorded his 10th career reception. Touchdown. He's the fifth player in NFL history to have ten. Passing, ten receiving and ten rushing touchdowns. The other four players are all in the hall of Fame.

Whoa.

Taysom Hill Hall of Fame.

Future hall of Fame.

Wow.

Yeah, I agree with that. Also can't tell the story of football without Taysom Hill.

Yeah, right. Also, bonus nerd nugget.

Oh. Sound the alarm. Hank.

So rewinding back to Wednesday's episode. There's a ton of drama entering this weekend's NWSL final, which is Saturday night, 08:00 P.m. Eastern on CBS. And I dove into this matchup between the ol Rain and Gotham FC. Rose Lavelle recurring guest the Goat Queen. She unfortunately has not scored yet this season, but she's taking eight shots. I'm calling my shot. She's scoring here in the championship game.

I like it.

So if you can bet that yeah.

If you thought college football was on the big screen this weekend, NWSL soccer.

That's actually why I'm not going out.

Because you're going to watch NWSL.

Yeah, I'm going to bet that. I've got multiple Roosevelt score.

Not to brag. I've got several TVs in my house. I'm going to have this on.

Yeah, the One TV people are going to be coming at you, big cat.

Oh, dude. The One TV people like, how many times are you dunked? I think actually people are just doing it just because they want to get dunked on. But yeah, it's crazy. It's crazy that people can't figure it out. Like, I am watching everything at all times. I'm like Morgan Freeman in Batman at that room where it's just TVs everywhere. Every sport you can think of, I.

Have it on the trip watching college basketball. NBA NWSL.

Also, this is right after the SEC on CBS 330 game, which is Tennessee Missou. And this championship game is right after you don't even have to change the channel.

Why did you say the treadmill thing? Hank I just remembered you talking about it. I did put four TVs in my home gym, and I have not been in my home.

It was a follow up.

Well, it was like, hey, just set it up as best as you can to try to work out. And it still isn't sticking.

Working out. It's hard.

It's hard, man. Routines, rhythms. Yeah.

You know, I've started to do because haven't had a lot of time to work out recently. I got a sauna. So I just get in my sauna and I sweat for 15 minutes, relatable and then I'm like, yeah, that was a workout. I'm trying to beat Joe Rogan.

I'll tell you what, I'm going to.

Start lying about how hot my sauna is. Yeah, 230 degrees, 45 minutes. That's my routine.

When we get the squat rack in this office, it's going to be like every space I ever occupy has workout gear and I just don't do it. I could trip into workout stuff, equipment, and I still won't work out.

I think we talked about the bench press in the old studio for like four years before we got in the studio. And then we got the it was.

Just Stephen Chay breathing heavy in our studio. When I'd come in at like 10:00 A.m..

I think if you're in the same room as weights, that kind of counts as working out.

Yeah. You look at them. Maybe just pick up one every now and then. Yeah.

Because I think your body has a physiological response to you looking at a heavyweight and it gets you in, like, workout mode, increases your heart rate, step up.

Like all right, let's go. Yeah.

Not actually I'm going to start, though.

Now that we're here.

No, you're not. You can't even do a fucking presentation. Thousand pound club. 1000 pound club. Max and I will be joining. Yes, I did get to like when I said I was going to do it last summer, I was like in the 850 range. But then that's the range where I'm going to get hurt. I think I could do it right now.

Could you?

No, you can't.

What's your bench?

24 hours stream. I mean, if you could deadlift 450, then yes, you can. You have to deadlift a ton. I could probably deadlift trap bar.

We got to do trap bar.

You keep saying that. Because straight bar is so much easier to get hurt. Okay, so we'll do trap bar.

Trap bar.

I think I could do 400. Okay. Right. Now, what was the last time that.

You did a deadlift? College baseball. So no, you absolutely could not.

True.

I forgot that I belonged to a nice gym in New York City. That I was in a great powerlifting routine.

But Max, we will hold ourselves accountable. We will get 1000 pound club. Club.

Yes.

By what day? Let's new Year's 2024. New Year's 2024. Yeah. So that two months. No, 14.

New Year's Day 2024.

No. New Year's Eve.

No, I'm going to say Memorial Day this year.

New Year's Eve 2024.

Max, I'm with you. Memorial Day this year. I'm going to be in such good shape. I'm going to have ABS. I'm going to bench pressing 325.

It's going to be sick. Okay, next game for the troops. Great game. Afternoon game. Lions at Chargers. I think the Lions are going to kill them.

I agree with you on this one.

Lions are healthy. Finally, their offensive line. So they got Frank Ragnau back, jonah Jackson back. David Montgomery back.

Graham Glasgow is going to get I think he's going to get the start.

Yeah. So the strength of the Lions offensive line is now healthy. Back off. A bye chargers. The chargers are not good. I know that they beat the jets. I know they've won a couple games in a row. They beat the Bears. Who cares? Everyone beats the bears. I don't think the Chargers are that good.

I don't think they are either. So I do think Justin Herbert is a good quarterback. He's a fine young man. Good quarterback. Does he have the dog? Actually, I'll put to you a different way, big cat. If you told Justin Herbert that there was a button that he could uh huh. And if he presses the button, the Chargers win the Super Bowl, but somebody dies. Do you think he presses the button?

Him? Yes.

I don't think he presses the button.

He presses the button.

I don't think he's the kind of guy that would press the button. I want a quarterback that would press the button.

I don't even think it's a Justin Herbert issue. So they beaten their wins are the Vikings when they were bad, which they won by four. I mean, the Vikings are playing well now. The Raiders, the Bears, the jets. I think it's actually more of a the Chargers are going off a little bit of reputation with their offense. And now that both you lost mike Williams, what, week three or whatever it was. Josh Palmer's. Not now. Out. It's like, okay. Keenan allen's really good. Austin Eckler's really good. Who after that? And so I think that we think, oh, yeah, the Chargers offense, it's electric. They got all these guys. I don't think they have that many guys right now. So I like the Lions in this game.

Their defense isn't that great. They're not as good as they looked against the jets.

Right.

That's for sure. And going from the Jets O line to the Lions offensive line is going to be a completely different type of football.

Yeah. All right.

I do like the Lions this week.

All right. Nerd Nugget.

There are 59 defensive players with at least four sacks in the NFL this season. Only the Chargers and Dolphins have four players in that group.

Okay. Falcons and cardinals. Kyler Murray back. He's playing.

Kyler 2.0. Beta comes out this weekend.

I knew he was going to play. Yeah, I knew he was going to play. He wants to play. I don't know if he wants to have his job as a Cardinals starting quarterback for the future, but he wants to play. Football players play.

But maybe the best way for him to not be a Cardinal in the future is to play and play well for the yes.

Yes. Well, no, if he plays and plays well, he will be the Cardinals future.

But he might be very attractive in a trade.

But if he plays well enough that they don't have the first pick, then he will most likely be okay.

It's going to come down to whether or not the owner bidwell feels like paying him all that money or wants to try to roll the dice.

No, remember? Yeah, he gave him a contract.

No, I know. I'm saying, like, that's why he would potentially trade.

I this game. For me, the entire analysis is the line makes no sense because it was one and a half. Cardinals are one in seven. I think they're one and a half point dogs. The Falcons, they're begging you take the Falcons. I feel like you have to take even though I think Kyler Murray will be just it makes no sense to me in my head.

Do you think Kyler knows his teammates names? Yes, I think he probably does.

James Connor. Maybe not back right now, but coming back soon.

Close soon. He's getting closer soonish. I do. I like Taylor. Heinecke in this game.

Got to get it done.

Got to get it done. Falcons need to win bad.

Has Arthur Smith officially, officially benched Desmond Ritter or is it still like this is not a performance based benching. Yeah, you just play like you're hurt. So we're going to put Taylor in the game.

I think he's in the same category as Bijon. Yeah, it's like we could play him, but we're not going to doghouse. Yeah. Nerd nugget in this game.

Cardinals wide receiver Mark Keese brown has a touchdown catch in all four home games this season. If he gets one again this week, he would join Mal Cutner, Larry Fitzgerald and Amquon bolden and Sonny Randall as the only players in franchise history with a touchdown catch in five straight home games.

Wow. People always talk about the Cardinals franchise history.

Larry Fitz.

Larry Fitz. Great.

Is he retired? Yes. Officially? Officially.

Maybe not officially. Officially. Okay, this one. Cowboys. Giants of cowboys. I just wrote down in my notes Tommy DeVito. What are we doing here? Yeah.

So this is the Tommy DeVito. Tommy DeVito definitely presses the button. He would kill everybody. Tommy DeVito is the human white flag.

We can say it's going to be bad.

If you're a Giants fan and you have no other plan but Tommy DeVito, what purpose do you have for waking up on Sunday?

It's very rare in the NFL. You see spreads over 14. It happens probably a handful of times a year. And I actually think the cowboys -17 is too low because I just don't know the Cowboys defense. This is what the cowboys do they kick the shit out of teams like this. They are going to demolish the Giants.

Yeah. This is going to be bad. It's going to be really bad for Giants fans. I feel sick knowing that you have to watch this. Knowing that we have to watch this game.

Yeah.

It's disgusting. It's disgusting that we have to do.

This is Brian Dable in the hot seat. He won coach of the year last year. But this has gone bad very quickly. And we already have. I think I saw one of the Giants defensive players called out Wink Martingdale, like by name. And he was like, that's never happened. That's weird.

Would you rather be the coach of the Giants and you're going into the cowboys game with Tommy DeVito or would you rather be the offensive coordinator for the Buffalo Bills? Last year, the Giants were they were fun. And I don't think that dable became a bad coach. That doesn't happen overnight.

No, he was a good coach last year. No, but it spiraled fast and it's more maybe it's just fired the GM for giving Daniel Jones all that money because now the Giants we've done our bleakest draft. And it was the Panthers last week when we were talking about how they don't picks and Bryce Young doesn't look like the guy the Giants might have taken the place for the Panthers because they paid Daniel Jones all this money and now he has a torn ACL. It's like the roster needs help everywhere. And how the hell are you going to get help everywhere?

And now Saquon is going to be expected to do everything on Sunday. I feel bad for Saquon more than anybody else.

Fake an injury, saquon?

Yes.

Be sick. Get food poisoning.

Get diarrhea.

Yeah.

You should find the nearest mudy pond and just fill up a pint glass with it and chug it until you poop.

Yes. Okay.

Nerd Nugget the first half has been a major concern for the Giants this year. Outscored 125 to 42 in nine games. They've only had two first half leads.

It's crazy that this game what was the line in this game? Week one? Was it like, Cowboys minus three?

I forget.

It feels like ages ago.

It was a different team, too, at the time.

Of course, we were going into it being like but the Cowboys killed them in that game. I think. What was it, 40 to nothing? 40 to nothing in week one? Was that what it was?

It was either 30 or 40 because I remember they played Giants and jets back to back. Right. Or first few weeks.

Three points. The Cowboys are three point favorites. Week one, they're 17 point favorites. Week ten, life comes at you fast. Real fast. Okay. Last afternoon, game commanders at Seahawks, I've said some shit about Gino Smith. I said I was done with him. I have a bad update. I'm back in on Gino Smith for the week. I did some soul searching with my Gino Smith. I'm done with him. I am done with him in a like, he's never going to win a Super Bowl. I think I probably should have been done with him for that a long time ago. But I'm going to give Gino a slight pass in the fact that he did play the Browns and the Ravens. And those are the two best defenses in the NFL, and they're the two best defenses at playing man coverage, which always kills Gino. So I expect a big bounce back week from Gino this week.

Yeah. I think it's fair to say that this is a very winnable game for the Seahawks. And Gino could look good against the secondary, which has had a lot of questions, most of which is, like, predicated on the pass rush and the whole scheme of just sending four guys at the quarterback and hoping that they get home for the Commanders.

And it worked against the Patriots because the Patriots are anemic on offense now. You have to play the Seahawks, who have a lot of talent. So, yeah, I think the Seahawks get right in this game. Yeah.

And I have reached the point with Sam Howe. If you look at the last, I think, four games that he's played, he is statistically in the top five in most important categories in his most recent games. So sam Howe. I'm fully in. Sam Howell is the guy. He's the future. If he has a stinker of a game this weekend out in Seattle, I'm willing to just say, okay, learning opportunity. The last time he had a shitty game was against the Bills, where he threw those four interceptions, and he learned.

A lot from those and tough game.

So I actually saw that Sam Howell has stopped taking sacks in the last, like, four weeks. He's had a huge improvement. I think he was by far the worst quarterback through the first few games of the season. I think through the first five games of the season, he was taking all kinds of sacks that he shouldn't be taking. And since then, he's become a top five in terms of getting the ball out, not taking sacks that are his.

Sam Howell.

So he's learning. The guy's learning. I love Sam Howe. I'm sold on Sam Howell as the future.

The one thing that could ruin Sam Howell washington.

No, just the vibes. Not eating beef.

If the commanders hire Bill Belichick? According to Hank, that would ruin Sam Howell.

He takes a step back in coaching from Ron Rivera.

Coaching, yeah.

That's fair.

The one thing you have to be afraid of if you're that's fair.

And I mean, I'll be totally honest.

It is all according to Hank, by the way. False. I think check would be fine coaching Sam Howell. Hank disagrees. Hank knows Belichick better than us.

99% of the reason I want Bill Belichick is just to fuck with Hank. It has nothing to do with what's going to happen on the football field. I just want to fuck with you. And it'd be great for the show.

It would be great for the show.

But, yeah, sam Howell, regardless of what happens this weekend, I'm ready to say it. He is the guy.

Yeah, I agree with you.

Nerd nugget, Washington loves Seattle. The Commanders have a seven and one record on the road against the Seahawks. They're 13 and six all time.

Whoa. Willie Compton's not walking through that door, though.

We're not talking about playoffs, though, are we?

Because I know for a fact it's regular season.

We've lost two playoff games in Seattle in the last years.

Also. Baby bump.

Baby bump.

John Bates. Backup tight end for Washington.

That was a baby bump.

That was a key bump, Hank. Yeah, maybe quit dumping Sack and start dumping some PowerPoints together.

Well, maybe dump sack, you'd get the PowerPoint done.

That's true.

Here's your formal reminder.

I do pills.

I think PST got him in already.

Yes, I got him in. He's plus 900.

He hasn't scored this season, but he got some targets.

Well, he scored at least once. He just had a baby, but it wasn't this season. True.

Yeah.

Fair points all around.

True. Yeah. Mexican standoff of true.

Okay. Yeah. Bates. He's a long shot to score. Definitely. This is a good, I guess, test case for whether or not the baby bump is real. Because he's the backup tight end, doesn't get a lot of red zone targets. If he scores this weekend, it's pretty clear that the baby bump is an actual thing.

Okay. Last game night game, the jets at Raiders. I got to say, the stat, the sad stat again, this will be the 34th night game for the jets and Giants since 2018. They are combined four and 29 straight up joke. That's crazy joke of a city. Two and 25 straight up in their last 27 night games.

It's bad. It's bad. At least they're playing the Raiders. I liked Antonio Brown's.

Pierce.

Pierce. Antonio Pierce's. Loopy speech that he gave where he was just saying that they're going to play against a bunch of physical gentlemen this weekend. Yeah, I believe that was his phrase. The jets are physical gentlemen.

Yeah, they are, for sure.

But that's major interim coach vibes. Give a quote like that. So I like that the Raiders are just I'm going to bet on them based on vibes. Their vibes seem high. Jets vibes seem low.

I feel like last week was the vibes game. This week might be the what is Antonio Pierce doing?

Game.

Yeah.

Which I mean, I do think that they should put a different interim coach every get rejuice.

Just keep getting the so they smoke cigars after the game?

Yep.

Is that the lowest bar ever reached for cigar smoking? Beating Tommy DeVito? It has to be. Right?

But it's also for getting rid of Josh McDaniels.

Right. That's really what the media is beating Tommy DeVito being like, we smoked them. Let's smoke these cigars. Like smoking cigars. Like Alabama, Tennessee, new baby, maybe like hole in one.

Your White House intern just hung out in the Oval Office for a while.

All these things are higher than beating DeVito. Yeah. Yeah.

It is a pretty low bar.

Low bar.

But you got to celebrate your wins any way you can.

Yeah. So I think the jets are going to win this game. Memes. Connor, what's up? What are you thinking?

I think the jets win this. Memes follow up question. Which part of my take follow up question. If the jets are getting their asses kicked, do you have the Twitter password written down somewhere so you won't lose it again?

I do have it written down. Okay. And I'll be in office.

Memes wi fi should be good. Memes follow up question. Follow up question. Big cat. Pardon my take. We're going to probably be taping during this game. Can you see a TV from your seat?

I can see a TV from my seat.

Okay. Thank God. Thank God. I still don't understand why we have the R. Kelly TV up there.

That should be on our side.

What is that?

That's possible.

Why is that small TV that was.

Designed and we're going to have to get a picture of this.

Was that for zoom?

Yeah.

What? That was for zoom. That looks like it's a twelve inch TV. Yeah, that's like yeah. If you're like sitting in a parking garage and you're keeping security overnight, you sit there and you just watch your little TV.

It's a Michael Scott TV.

Yeah.

Like when you walk into CVS and you see the security.

Yeah, like that.

It should be blurry. It should be stop motion.

That was supposed to be for zoom. What the fuck? So is this one going to stay off memes? Is this one going to stay right.

In front of us?

I think so. We got to get the social corner going. The tech guys are still don't let.

Us settle, though, Hank.

No, we're not settling.

I want to settle bad. No, you know me. I'm like, we're done. No, we might be done.

If this set up stays here for long enough.

Yeah.

I'm talking like five more days, then it's just going to be I'm going.

To fall in love with it. I'm going to be pissed when you try the zoom.

Maybe you like it if we get like 4K.

Listen, I didn't get my car fixed in the first three days after I ran it into your poll. My car is just going to be like that.

Yeah. When you keep something and it just stays and it's like part of our existence, I don't want to change. It like the Lenny Dijkstra poster that's just sitting not hung up. I never want that hung up. It's perfect where it's really you only have like, maybe a week. No, I feel settled in, don't you? PFT.

This is where we live.

I feel so settled in.

Once the rug gets put down, then we'll have wait, there's a rug? We have a sick blue rug.

Yeah, it's going to be a nice rug.

What do you think about the walls in the booth? I don't like change.

We should decorate the wall disgusting.

Yeah, you guys should put some shit up there.

Yeah, I told names I was going to put up my hole in one certificate. No, we said no.

I will smash it if it's up there. No, we need wait.

Jake, you got a certificate for your hole in one?

Yeah, it's hanging out my fridge right now.

Yeah. Do not, Jake. All right. I can't be held responsible for this. If I ever see that thing, I will smash it. So you have to make sure I never see it. Like, if you invite me to your house one time, you put it in the closet.

Maybe, like, a rack of ties right there. Jake that'd be cool.

Yeah, I do have that.

No. What do you guys think? No, you can put up anything. Something that's, like, funny. That the people no, the Lenny Dyke shirt. That has to stay. That really puts together the whole room sitting in the corner. I don't know. We'll find something.

I think it should be I think it should be a giant montage of Max's most sad moments.

That would be cool.

I like it.

There's enough to choose from. Oh, should I start?

I have an idea.

Jake idea alert.

Hey, anytime you guys say, write a reminder, there's a physical reminder.

We tried the big calendar once. We made it one week.

Yeah, never mind.

Scratch it. No. Big calendars suck. They suck because they're just on the calendar. Put it on the calendar. Fuck that. I think if Jake was in charge of the calendar, though, that it would be I won't respect the calendar, though. That's the problem.

You got a reminder, you're like, screw it, right?

And I don't like to see my reminders. I wanted to be surprised by my reminders. Like, I had no idea we had to respect Doug Peterson as a coach today.

That was only, like, five weeks ago.

Again, I had no idea. Jake. I don't know what I did yesterday. This is all a blur. Every football season is just one big blur.

Yeah.

We got to find something good. Maybe a poster. Merch Merch poster. Maybe some hot chicks.

Maybe we do part of my take. Player of the week.

What about the Pink Floyd butts cut?

College it up. Do the kiss.

Yeah.

Bob Marley Boondock Saints poster.

Yeah. John Belushi with the college.

Yeah, that'd be good.

Really try to make everyone think we're really cool. A couple of 40 year olds with Bob Marley posters. Yeah, we burn.

You guys burn.

Look at this. Look at this view right now. PFT. We are so settled in. I don't want anything changing.

By far. The craziest thing about this office is that we have a TV that dies every hour.

There's a way to fix.

Don't go up.

There's a way to fix.

How did we get here? What do you mean? Right here on the podcast. We're talking about we're loopy, and we're just talking about things we're seeing. Hank. I like that, though, because it actually makes you, like you have to do something. I'm always doing stuff. What does Hank do? He clicks the remote every he presses another button every 20 minutes.

Hank literally has a job that could be done by one of those birds with the water.

You should set that up, Hank. You should automate it with the bird.

Have you guys seen that bird on.

TikTok that just says materials what?

I don't know why I think about it all the time, but that's what's.

Going on in your brain. It's just a bird.

Yes.

It like, Go bird said something.

It'll be like glass, it'll be like metal. And it just says what the material is. It's sick.

What? You gotta send that to me? I'd like to see that should also.

Be a segment max explaining TikToks.

Yeah. Oh, I thought you were going to say max telling us what metals there are. This weekend there was Max licking objects and telling us what they're made of.

This weekend, I was just like randomly it would just pop into my head.

And I would say out loud, metal.

Because that's what the bird sounds like.

You got a lot going on up there. Okay. Did we do a nerd nugget on this game?

No, but this is my nerd nugget of the week.

I think if you're listening, like, Colts, Patriots, Jets, Raiders, two of the best previews ever done in podcasting history, you.

Feel super informed going into this. It's like we try to make you smarter as a football fan.

Yes.

Yeah. Nerd nugget of the I tell you guys, that's really cool.

All right, I'm going to grade it unbiased.

Yep. So far they've been good, right?

Yeah. But you did mention the hole in one, so it's not going to be totally unbiased.

Raiders punter AJ. Cole averaged 64 yards per punt last week with a minimum of four punts. That's the highest average in NFL history. That's best punting game ever.

AJ.

Cole, how many do you write that down for?

Boomers.

Five.

J. Cole.

Okay, got you. What about Thomas Morstead the other day?

I don't know, but it wasn't a 64 yard average.

I understand, but that's also field position.

That is a high average.

I'm just going to have to dig into this nerd nugget for a second. So far, I'm starting with, like, a minus grade, but let me see.

You know who I miss is marquette King. The old putter for the Raiders should.

Have nuggied Mark Davis. I know, that was bad. All right, I'm looking it up right now. Thomas Morstead in that game. The Giants and the jets. Let's see punts, kicking punting. Thomas Morstead.

Yeah, but keep in mind they want the Giants, so it didn't really yeah, see?

All right. It's going down to B plus.

Okay.

I like it. Jake, anytime you say in NFL history B plus is good, I'm going to be impressed.

Single game, NFL record.

But Thomas Morsette had eleven punts for 529 yards. So that's 48.1 average and four inside the 20. So if they're punting three inside the five, it does depend on three inside the five on where you kick from. Right. So it's a B plus is a good take. It that's your nerd nugget of the week. Okay, last game. Let's do some picks.

Is everyone muted?

Yeah. I want to show everyone.

This bird.

Oh, he's going to show us the bird. Hell yes.

Wait, I thought I was.

No, I said that to the booth because we could talk. No, we heard everything he said. We heard you fart too.

I'm sorry. Next.

Show us the bird.

Show us the fucking bird. No, don't cut it. Show us the bird. We'll just hear it. What's this small cuff made of? What's this made of? Glass. What's this made of? Yeah. All right. So this is a look into Max's brain. He's like, this is the greatest video ever. You have to watch it. It's cool. I can tell. I want to kill that bird. I sent it to you.

You can see it.

What's this made of? Hollow tip. Yeah, that's right, bitch. Last thing. You all right, Cyanide? Okay, let's do some games. Let's pick some games. Let's do some records. Yeah.

Who goes first?

Hank? No, I think Jake.

Oh, me.

Yeah.

So first up, pancakes.

Yes.

We are getting in a tight race right now. Hank is still dominating with 34, and then Big Cat and Max with 21, memes with 20, me and PST with 18.

Oh, I like it.

So it's wide open.

Fuck yeah.

What do you want?

Not to lose. Yeah.

Getting tight.

What do you mean?

But Hanks dominating.

And what's the punishment again?

00:30 612 1824.

Yeah, for the Pancakes as it goes placement. Do I have anyone injured?

Yeah, we did say one ad drop. I'll read you your roster. That's not going to can't yeah, on.

The no, no, I'm just saying. I don't know.

I'm not sure. I think Ezra Cleveland. Did he just get traded?

Yeah.

Yep, he did. Is that a real know we know this. We know he.

From Vikings to why?

That's why I said yes.

Football talk.

Yeah, he's on the Jaguars now. Yeah, exactly.

Trade from the Vikings. Right.

His name does sound like a 90s sitcom character.

How does he not play for the Browns?

So, I'll look into the injury update.

Okay. Yeah, let us know about the injuries. All right, for the picks, halfway home.

For the opening act, 15 minutes in Las Vegas. I'm ten, seven and one. Max is ten and eight, Memes is eight and ten. So two and a half from top to bottom. Pretty even for the main event. You guys, 1 hour. Big Cat, ten, six and two, PFT, ten and eight.

Hank.

710 and one.

There's a little distance. There still 18 picks left.

Oh, no.

Oh, Hank, you can even do a PowerPoint.

We got to do points, by the.

Way, and you got to do an.

Hour maybe we got to start doing it, start rating it by points.

1110, seven and a half for you guys.

Okay, that makes more sense.

And then ten and a half, ten eight for us.

Okay, that makes more sense because I can't do record.

Yeah, I'll start.

How much am I up? Yeah, all right. You're in trouble.

Yeah, but I'm on my Joe Burrow shit. That's when I turn it on.

He turned it on, like, three weeks ago.

I thought you were going to turn it on in September.

You couldn't even find your computer for a week. All right, Jake. Go ahead.

I'm going to take the Cleveland Browns plus six and a half at the Ravens.

Okay.

It's a close game, AFC north. Everyone's good?

I will be taking the Jaguars plus three.

Oh, I got the 49 ers.

Okay.

I will be taking the over in.

The Lions Chargers game over 48 and a half.

Okay. Hank. Hank.

I will be taking the Patriots plus two and a half.

Oh, two. Back in the saddle plus two.

Two and a two.

I'm looking at two and a half right now.

Same. Stop trying to cheat.

Jake, are you on the barstow sportsbook? I am at Barcelona SportsBook.com. The score.

I'm on the Barcelona sports is two and a half.

It's two and a half on the Barcelona sports.

Refresh. Got a refresh?

I pulled this tab up at the beginning of the show.

Come on, jeez.

They knew Hank was going to change his pick.

All right, I'm going to go with the Commanders seahawks over 44 and a half.

Okay. I'm going to go with the Dallas Cowboys. -17.

Wow.

I love it.

Yeah, I'm doing fuck it.

I love it.

And then it's me again.

Yeah.

Against the Giants.

Yes.

Against the Giants. Thank you. I'm going to go with the Falcons Cardinals over 43 and a half points.

Okay. I will take the Detroit Lions minus three.

I will be taking the Steelers Packers over what is it?

Yuck.

38 and a half.

Yeah.

Gross.

You got a yuck.

You got a yuck memes.

Did somebody take the niners?

No, Max took the jags. This could be a huge head to head matchup. Pull the trigger.

Oh, boy. Are you doing it?

Niners minus three.

Wow, that's huge for our warm up act.

Huge.

Wow. I will be taking the Texans Bengals.

Over oh, I like it.

Where are we at, Texans Bengals? I'm looking at 46 and a half.

Okay. And Jake finishes off.

I'm going to take Titans bucks over 39 and a half. Will Levis, he can put up 40 on his own.

Okay. Good job, boys. Should you some fantasy fuck, boys. Yes. What's up, boy?

What's up, boy?

My name is Jameson Javelini. My stardom is the lotto ball machine.

Big cat. You ever got this big cat's? Not in the room right now. This is a fancy fuck, boys. You're talking to Christy for delente right now. My cinem is big cat guy can't.

Pick a lottery ball to save his life. And my sleeper, Khalil Mack, he's going to have a big game this weekend for the Charles.

What was your name again?

Jameson Javalini.

Sounds like Jameson Javalini didn't do another part of his job and come up with some fantasy fuck boys.

What do you mean?

I said just saying shit in front of him. I don't think that a guy like.

Jameson Javalini would ever neglect doing something.

That he was supposed to be prepared for for a Friday podcast. Yeah, that was fire. Yeah. Okay. That was straight fire. That was not straight fire. Fire. Hey, what's up?

It's Tommy DeVito.

Tommy.

I'm starting this weekend for the New York Giants. I'm going to really stink it up out there. I might throw upwards of 15 yards. My stardom. I'm starting Uganda. Uganda in the part of my Africa Bowl. They're playing against Kenya on Sunday. It's a rivalry game like you wouldn't believe right now. We're running the Ruganda offense.

Quarterback.

Marv twist for you.

Yeah, great quarterback name. Marvelous Marv.

We've got some great coaches on the Uganda team.

Look forward to an update from Donnie.

Duz after we stomp this shit out of Kenya.

Maserati Marv.

That's what I call him. I'm sitting Dylan Brooks. He might be the dumbest Canadian going out there.

He got LeBron's face last night. LeBron was just laughing at him. It was great. Great data. NBA doesn't start till Christmas.

I'm sleeping. I'm sleeping.

Fireplaces. That's my sleep of the week. Fireplace. Fireplace.

Season got the fireplace going.

Love it.

Make sure to clean out your fireplaces.

Before starting new fire.

Every chimneys.

Sweep your chimneys. Keep the carbon monoxide out because that's.

A sleeper right there. Knock your ass right out. Love a good fireplace. Love fireplace. It's the best.

All right. What's up, guys? It's Christopher de Lente.

Hey, Chrissy.

My stardom is bats. The Nevada game got delayed because of bats. Have you seen that TikTok with a.

Bat that keeps saying words?

Yeah, it's awesome.

I'm going to spend five minutes of.

A podcast talking about yeah, he hits a basketball. He says basketball. He hits a button, he says, I forget to push this. He hits a fist, he's like, Is that manu Ginobli? My Cinem is the White Sox. How the fuck you let Jason Benetti, good Italian guy, leave the organization? Love Jason. He's going to the Tigers.

19 six all over again.

Insane. And my sleeper is Henry Lockwood, because I'd like to fucking put him to sleep for good. I'm talking kill the guy murder. I could take a nap. Is that Hank? Our podcast downloads would go crazy if.

I murdered Hank live on the air.

Yeah. Well, no, if I murdered him. But it was like a murder mystery. It was like, we don't know if Hank's how did Hank get murdered?

We do true crime on it.

And then like a month later, they're like, oh, big cat, murder him. Like, you don't think that podcast will pop if we're all about numbies?

I actually do think that we should record a podcast together in case one of us dies.

Yeah.

And then we drop it right after the fact.

I'm down for that we should do three then.

Yeah. What do you mean?

Like one for if big cat dies. One for if PFT dies.

Yeah, like our podcast funeral.

Yeah, I actually love that idea.

Just do them all at once.

Yeah, I love that in a row.

Imagine the numbers. It's like your final gift to the rest of the guys is a huge episode.

I would say so many slurs.

No, I wouldn't.

But that would be funny if you're just like, you can't cancel me. I'm dead. Yeah.

I'm dead, bitch. This is Ghost PFT talking right now.

All right.

I wrote that down on Wednesday, by the way.

My brain just stopped. Oh, Sam Schwarzenegger. We have an awesome interview. So people probably don't know the name Sam Schwarzenegg. He's been a friend of the show for a very long time, and he is so goddamn smart with football. So I'm putting a must listen tag because we're going to have him back on again. He is so good at talking football, understanding the game.

We probably should have had him on a long time ago because he has been a good friend of both mine and Big Cats for, I think, like, seven years.

Yeah, long time. So he's great. Finally, he was in Chicago, so we're like, all right, let's do it. And then now he's in the recurring guest. So we'll definitely have him back on. I think people are going to really enjoy this interview.

Great harbor stories.

Great harboss stories. Before we do that, PFT, before we.

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Okay, we now welcome on a very special guest. He's a personal friend of mine and PFTs he is Sam Schwarzene. Who for people to set the stage. Sam, we've been friends with him for a very long time. He actually was very helpful in the early days of PMT, getting us one of our first interviews when we had DeCastro on when we went to the Steelers. So, Sam Quick resume. Played college football at Stanford.

Blocked for Andrew Luck and Jim Harbaugh.

And Jim Harbaugh, well blocked for we have some Harbaugh questions. He worked for Oliver Luck at XFL when it first came out and he was doing the rules, everything. Now he is at Amazon and he works on the Thursday Night Football Prime Vision, which is awesome for any football fans out there who's pretty much everyone listening. Watch the Prime Vision, sam's little baby there. It shows you football like you've never seen. So it's the coolest experience. And Sam is a true football guy and we wanted to have him on to talk football, talk Prime Vision and whether or not Harbaugh knew.

We can start there. Harbaugh knew? Yeah, I don't think he knew. Oh yeah, I don't think he knew.

You think he isolates his information? He keeps himself in a silo, protected.

Oh yeah, he'll do anything to win. But it doesn't necessarily mean that he's going to be the one to execute everything. He will say, hey guys, we have to do anything we need to win. But I don't think he's going to get down. And does he?

I remember listening to Jim Harbaugh like I think it was a year ago, he started talking about protecting Michigan football from all enemies, foreign and domestic. Does he actually believe that whatever football program he's coaching is a sovereign state?

Yeah. His entrance was to Stanford was will approaches with enthusiasm and known to mankind. And I support no cause, foreign or domestic, other than the greatness of Stanford football. And so that is all it is. It's all about the bubble, creating this atmosphere that nothing matters. We weren't allowed to be in any frats. We were each other's brothers. He made us himself the enemy. So it was all like, you guys have to like each other. You can hate me, but just like each other. So all he cares about is winning. All he cares about is doing whatever it needs to do to win. So I don't think he knew, but it's not like he's not going to bend the rules. He had found things about officiating that we manipulated at Stanford. He wasn't going to go out and maybe do all the stuff that is reported from connor Stallions. But I don't think he knew.

I think he just liked Connor stallions. Like the cut of his jib.

Yeah, because Connor stallions like a mini Jim Harbor. He reminds oh, you have a manifesto. Mine's actually a thousand pages. Yeah.

Oh, you wrote yours in a Google Doc. Interesting. Mine's in excel.

Yeah, he wants people who are going to take initiative and go the extra mile. I think that's about it.

So, I mean, we are harbaugh guys. What was it like playing for him? Because you've told us some stories, and it feels like as long as you can realize, like, hey, all he does want to do is win, I'll go through hell for him because he will get us there.

Yeah. One of my favorite harbaugh stories was after practice, he would always do wise words. He would do something, and then another player at random would pick a guy, and he was like, I heard someone say, I'm playing favorites. Of course I have favorite players. The best players are my favorites. Owen Marisic, he's the best player. He's my favorite. Andrew Luck, he's the best player. He's my favorite. If you want to be my favorite, be the best player. So you didn't know where you stood. He didn't really want you to talk back. So, like, guys like Richard Sherman and Doug Baldwin, publicly, I'm not sharing anything new, didn't get along great with him, their time at Stanford, and it's because they already kind of stood up for themselves. But if you were one of the best players of contributing, he would like, yeah, we didn't have the best relationship when I was at Stanford because I got hurt early, but definitely was like, you're not actually, it was I broke my hand in one on one, so I have the scar still. And then I went and did another rep, and I went up to the trainer.

I was like, My hand kind of hurts. And he was like he shifted my bone. And I was like, Is it broken? He was like, Are you an idiot? Your bone moved. And I went there, and I had my hand wrapped up, and I was like, I don't think it's broken. Harper's like, yeah, it's not broken. You'll be fine, Sammy.

You'll be fine.

And I went to the next morning. I was like, I have to get surgery. And he was like, all right, I'll see you in six weeks. See you later.

I already told you it wasn't broken.

We had this conversation last night. What happened overnight?

Yeah.

So he obviously will do whatever it takes to win. He is a true football guy. Would he still practice with you guys? Would he take reps at quarterback?

He would teach us how to do under center snaps. So it was all about the fourth knuckle at the center's butthole. So he used your butthole or when I was working with Andrew, he would lay underneath me to make sure Andrew was in there. He's like, he's on the ground looking up like he's working on a know. It's been great. I still have a relationship with Coach. He helped when I was doing the XFL rulebook helping. He had actually some really cool ideas about overtime. And I saw him at a wedding this past year. Trent Murphy got married and we were going into it. I was like, hey, Coach, remember when you helped me with Know overtime rule? He had idea to make it a fifth quarter, so just a quarter change instead of a half change. So the whole game was still part of it. And then do sudden death from there. And it's a great idea. It just makes two minute warning, not matter as much the final two minute drill. I told him that, he was like, why didn't you do it? I was like, well, coach, we're doing it. And so in the middle of this wedding, we're both going at it just like we did five years ago.

Going back and forth about this overtime rule.

What did he wear to a wedding? Khakis.

No, he wore a suit. He was respectable. He might have worn khakis. I'll go try and find check the.

Tape on mean, the way you talk about Harbaugh, you can tell like there's true love there. And it's like you went through wars for him. And his time at Stanford was incredible because I think people, they know Jim Harbaugh from NFC Championship games, from obviously what he's doing at Michigan now. He made Stanford a great football team for a long stretch.

Yeah, I mean, him coach Shaw was able to maintain. Coach Harbaugh will come in, he'll shock the system. He got rid of all traditions at Stanford and it was one of the funnier things he said it was before I got there. But he goes, yeah, you guys can't do any traditions because you're such losers.

See, this is why I want them on the Bears.

I don't know what makes you guys losers. So I have to get rid of everything.

Yeah.

And so it was changing everything.

I don't know what makes you losers.

I'm changing everything.

Your traditions aren't working.

Yeah, clearly.

And it reminds me of Dion, right? Like, Dion comes in and he's like, you might not agree with everything. Not everything was perfect that Harbaugh did that first year. But come in the blue collar shirts. We all had blue collar shirts. And Stanford has a lot of private school kids, even when I went to a public school. But it was in a nice town, right? But everyone wear a blue collar shirt. And he was like, you might not have worn one, had a blue collar job. Your dad didn't. Your grandpa may not have even but somebody at one point had to wear this shirt. And he got us playing tough like Stanford's not traditionally tough team, but by time I left. We were the toughest team on the block, maybe Oregon State and Utah, but we were one of the tougher teams in the Pac Twelve because he instilled that mindset. And it carried through with shifting from a gruden offensive running zone scheme to downhill power football, getting guys like we used to call it the Trees Company, where we had three tight ends on the field all the time, or having eight offensive linemen.

I love just trying to pound that's.

My favorite formation in football.

Yeah, by far. You're so right too, about the toughness of Stanford because it would be like one of the dumbest things I would do every single year is watch Oregon score like 90 points a game and then in early November play Stanford.

I'm like, they're going to score 90 points a game.

No, Stanford would just be like, we're tougher than you. We're not going to let you do this. We're going to play the game on our terms.

And that was Harbaugh and that whole era. We had Vic Fanjio as a coach.

Yeah.

And we kind of knew Harbaugh was really good at getting replacement coaches. We had DJ durkin. There was about eleven coaches I had that became NFL or professional head coaches. That's crazy.

So do you think Harbaugh can fix the Bears? Oh, yeah. He would just immediately just stuff everyone.

In a locker and be like, we're doing stuff differently. Yeah, I know he would do something different because one of the things that he did at Stanford was he saw that Nevada rushed for more yards than us. He was like, how could someone rush for more yards than us? So we're pounding the rock. We have Toby Gerhardt. Well, Colin Kaepernick was running the Pistol offense back when the Pistol was like a three and a half yards. They ran all this weird stuff with it. So he sent Greg Roman there, go steal that offense and bring it back. So our first year when he was coaching up, it was like all the blocking schemes were backwards. We didn't understand what was happening. But Andrew would run out for 65 yards out the gate, or it was Stefan Taylor would run up the middle for 14 yards. It's like we didn't even know we were doing. And now we see that leads to them drafting Kaepernick, Greg Roman, going from all these different jobs, getting quarterbacks at the level that they need to be. And so it was like we had that. We had Vic Fangio. The first time he was running Cover Six was with us.

Now it's taken over the like there was some weird history of random chance because Harbaugh was willing to try new things.

That's a great point because I think we sometimes put some of these coaches in a box. Like even Saban, we just taped our college football. Well, actually he's going to air Friday, so on Wednesdays we talk college football and Saban doesn't get enough credit for always adapting, because you think like, oh, he's an old guy. He's got the best players. Like, no, he won national titles with Greg McElroy and running the football and playing defense, and then he went and got the best wide receivers, the best quarterback, spread offense. Now he's going back to something different. Like, these guys that seem like they are so rigid, they are the best at adapting.

Oh, yeah. You have to be fanatic about it. That's what I love about football, that's when doing the rule changes, analytics is like, how can we innovate?

Right?

How can I see something new each week? And that's what makes it different than every other sport where we kind of know three and D is the best thing to do in NBA. If you could shoot like the warriors, shoot like the warriors. Now we have Wemby at least he adds another element. But like football, there's so many different ways to win, so many unique things you can do.

Okay, so off of that, you watch, obviously, everything. You watch the tape, you have Thursday night prime vision. Who's innovating the best right now in the NFL?

I mean, it's hard to go away from the Dolphins.

Yeah.

So they have a few things that I love so much. Like, they run the cheap motion, right? Everyone's cross formation motion. Everyone wants motion to go laterally. Now they start doing the motion outwards, and they kind of moved away from it. Not as much, but still a lot of motion. They also do something interesting. Tua has one of the shortest time to throws and one of the furthest air yards per target, meaning he's taking not that long to throw, but he's also pushing the ball down the field. So he's throwing over ten area yards. Maybe that's changed since then, but he's like at that point, so they're like third and ten is not as big of a deal, because we're always trying to get ten yards. We're always trying to get extra yards, but they're also not putting them in harm's way, which usually, hey, you're taking a long time to get these guys on field. Let's get the fast guys, get them sooner, and then throwing the ball there.

Yeah.

They're also manipulating data because everyone looks at people don't think of football as hardcore analytics, but it was one of the first analytics sports tendencies probabilities. You look in their shift emotion data, it's like 80%, but they'll get up to a line of scrimmage and run a lazy shift at the start of it. And that still counts in the data as a shift, even though it might not do it. So you're not like, oh, my God, I have to practice all these shifts.

So they know what other people are looking for and they're fucking with the data. Oh, screw up their game.

That's fascinating.

It's the next level. You know, Belichick used to do it a lot where if they were up by a lot, they'd run a ton of COVID zero, because now teams are like, oh, I'm looking at the Patriots. I have to practice all this cover zero. But they were up 20 points situational.

Yeah.

And so they're like, they're not that heavy of a cover zero team. So the ways you can use the data knowing they're looking at it, it's like a lot of what Shanahan does is looking at what other people are going to adjust to their adjustments. That's where you start seeing the little intricacies of the game. And that's what understanding the data now lets you go. How can I predict what the behavior will be next? Not necessarily what I've already seen, but how do I predict what will they do next?

That's fascinating.

And you're behind the scenes in a lot of this data stuff, and you can just watch prime vision, see the fruits of your labor, what you've put together. You also dropped a bomb on us. I think it was it last year or two years ago where you said you casually mentioned the fact that there was a chip inside the football. We have a chip inside the football. Measure everything.

There is a chip inside the football. Zebra has shoulder pad chips in every shoulder pad. There's a chip inside the football. It's in the middle of a football, in the football. But we can still calculate to the front of the football next gen stats powered by AWS. They're the ones who manage all of the data that comes from the on field tracking data.

Okay, so a lot of people have asked, why don't we get the chip of the football to determine a first down, determine if it goes over an upright or if it goes in for a field goal. I personally like I think Big Cat personally likes the chain and the stick. It's good to see just dudes running out there with hardware, figuring out if it's a first down or not.

A ref does the two little fingers together. Then you meme it being like, look at my dick.

Yeah, the tiny little guy. And one ref goes like, this is like yeah, that's what they all say.

Yeah.

Even though you're a big analytics guy, big science guy, technology guy, you also agree that chains and sticks are really the way to go, right?

I love chains. I'm like I'm one of the biggest proponents of chains because when I was at the XFL, this was my job to try and solve it. If you ask anybody what they would do when they changed football, I had Greenfield to do whatever I wanted. The XFL within reason, on budget. And I was like, okay, let's solve it. People keep asking for this. Then you realize it's like, maybe zero point 75 times per game. Are we actually taking the chains out? And it's fewer times now. I think there. Was one in the first 20 games in the NFL. So it's like you're really not seeing it that much. And so now you're solving a problem that doesn't happen all that time, all that much. But then here's the beauty of chains. They're always ten yards. Yeah, ten yard chains are ten yards. Now, I think there's a lot of cool things that we can do if we can get there. With the Defensive Alert model that we now have on Prime Vision, my eyes have been opened up to what we as Amazon can do as a lot of unique things. So I don't know where we're going to go next, or I can't release where we're going to go next, but the sky's the limit on what is solvable.

I'll say for right now, though, what I did at the XFL is we would start every new set of downs at a new yard line. And you'll see, college football does this. I think sometimes the NFL, they'll do this where if you got eleven and a half yards, they'll just start it at that twelveTH yard. So now you're seeing fewer measurements because you're going off of the yard line ten yards.

Yeah.

So we already see all we have to get to the line. The hardest part of measuring this stuff is you have to possession is a weird thing. No other sport has possession quite like the NFL does. So you have to get possession, then you have to get which body parts down, then get where the ball is in that moment. And we're doing all these other plays with human eyes. Now you're going to add one play to say the computer is going to solve the problem, right? Makes it more difficult. But there's a lot of cool things we can do throughout the process trying to solve that bigger problem.

So what do you want to solve? What's the next big advancement in football?

I think what we're doing now for those who haven't seen Prime Vision, defensive Alert is kind of how I watch the game. When I was a center, I watch what's likely to blitz, which players are going to come. That is how we're now showing the game based on machine learning, be able to show which players are likely to blitz. So now you know how to watch defense. There's so many different things we can do to give a guided viewing experience, whether it's helping you understand coverage or help you make you smarter about the game. Where could the ball go? We have prime targets showing which player is likely to convert a first down if they got the ball. So we highlight that player with a green orb. There's all these different things to do about how do we make you, a smarter football fan, understand it? We've talked a lot about schematics over the years about how to understand certain things. I had to put some respect on Blake Bordel's name probably five years ago because everyone's talking bad about him, but other teams are still respecting him as a thrower. And we can show that prime vision.

We want to make people have that same conversation but automate it, right? I come in every now and then and give you analytics about how to watch the game in a unique way, but so many things we can do with automation and graphics that are in real time, which is one of the cool parts of it, is I'm not selecting any player to blitz. I can't control anything on the defensive alert model. It just happens. We just let it run.

What about a flame coming out of the back of football when they throw deep?

See, we want to do more fun stuff like that. You and I have talked about ways to highlight defensive linemen. Good jump.

I think my suggestion to you was if a player is running really fast, have their shoes light up like it's NBA Jam and they're on turbo.

Yes, you had that one. You had if a player jumps off the line of scrimmage really fast, show them there. And I actually did a bunch of research on that. That's something I hope to get in soon to identify guys like guy like Miles Garrett when he jumps off the ball. If you go a certain speed, you're going to increase your chance of getting a sack. So how do we watch that player? How do we highlight the unique things the players do?

You know what you need to do. These are all fantastic for your own fraternity of offensive linemen. I think one thing that football fans get wrong, and I count myself as getting it wrong all the time, is when a sack is the offensive lineman's fault and when it's the quarterback's fault. Because I think it happens a lot more than people realize that the quarterback, whether it be holding onto the ball too long, getting stepping out of a clean pocket, all these things that you can just it's one of those easy tropes that we all use. Oh, our offensive line is bad. Well, maybe the quarterback is playing in a way that's not helping your offensive line.

Yeah, North Carolina just had an earthquake because Jeff Schwartz is jumping up and.

Down now asking for that.

Yes, shout out to but like, yeah, that's definitely something. And Data has shown that quarterbacks account a lot more for sacks than people think is a quarterback's behavior will create sacks whether or not play caller is involved in that, too. So there's a ton of different things that go into the sack. So there is a solvable problem. That could be something we're trying to do as much as we're trying to recreate. My brain watching the yeah, yeah, that's a solvable problem.

It's just so fascinating because there's so many little intricacies to the game and watching a quarterback not be able to manipulate a clean pocket. It's like when you think about the greatest quarterbacks like Peyton Manning or Tom Brady, these guys, the little stuff that people don't even notice is why they were great. And being able to always step up in a clean pocket and shift and never leave and leave your offensive lineman just stuck on an island and having to block for 7 seconds and all this, like that's it it didn't really.

Matter for Brady who was calling plays and who was blocking for him. As long know, guys like Dante Scarneckia, who was probably the best position coach of all time, the O line coach at the like, as long as he was there, Brady was being protected. And it didn't matter when he went to Tampa where he was. So now it's like sacks seemed to be a heavy QB stat.

Right?

Right. Still can't, you know, drop back, seven step drop and max protect. When you've got a lot of fifth rounders and undrafted guys in front of you.

It's funny just like thinking about Brady because we have this debate now with Belichick, and the more time passes, it's pretty apparent that the Patriot Way was just tom Brady was really fucking good at, like, all these things. Fix it. When you have a really fucking good quarterback, I think Matt Mahomes is kind of doing the same thing where it's like, he's just really fucking good at.

Know, what data can't really measure is that human nature of football and what a locker room does. But I had this feeling at Stanford from Toby Gearhart to Andrew Luck, and then I had like eight All Americans on defense. I always knew I had the best player on the football team on the field every single game in, you know, we still lost games, but at least I knew that when you have that guy in your room, everyone else will step up. Right. Like, even guys like Dante Hightower, who's probably the most underrated defensive player in history, what he did for that defense now COVID year, he sits out, all of a sudden we're seeing that team change because he's the one who commanded the entire defense. He'd play on the ball, off the ball, manipulate tight ends. He could cover every position. Now they don't have that either. So if you don't have the superstar player, that then will rally everyone that matters.

Yeah, it does elevate everyone. That's just the nature of sports. If you have one guy you're like, all right, he's going to be the guy for us.

You play more confidence, right?

I think I can do more in the weight room. I can do more watching film. I feel confident. It's not dumb hustle going out there every week.

It's a great yeah, yeah.

So we talked about the Dolphins before being the one team that innovates more than any other team. What team or coach do you think is at the bottom end of OOH? And does his name rhyme with Rod Knowles?

No, it does not. Because the thing about Tod Bowles, I think that's the one that rhymes with.

No, I didn't talk about Ron Rivera.

But Tod Bowles actually does a lot of unique actually, the Defensive Alert model didn't pick up a lot of it because he breaks blitzing rules. Like, there's unwritten rules of blitzes. And our model was like, Why is he blitzing? Well, they also got beat doing that. So he does do some exotic blitzes and he will try new things. I think there are some teams out there I'm not going to name names, so I'm going to avoid the question.

But you can say not like Rhyming names, weaver Fluce.

Some teams roll the ball out there and just pray, okay? Or they take history lessons and they're like, oh, look, this cover three from the Legion of Boom. That was a big defense that doesn't exist anymore. Let's keep doing that. That's not the game anymore. That was when it was under 50% pass. Now 60% of plays are passes. Almost every team's at eleven personnel. Every time, you can't just roll the ball. And we see the Seahawks don't even run the Gus Bradley. The Pete Carroll Monty Kiffin cover three defense anymore. Yeah.

So you mentioned something there, and it's something I love about talking football with you because there's been an analytic shift. I think people are getting smarter in football, but there also is a feeling from some of the analytics crew like, oh, well, passing is just you get more yards, just pass the ball. And you always tell me you have to run the ball. You have to run the ball because you have to have your offensive lineman going forward. And running the ball is just as important as passing the ball. To tell everyone who thinks that the answer is always just passing on first down. Why is that not the case?

We've talked about physics, right? Like, you need to be able to go forward so that the defender will be on their heels a little bit. If they're allowed to fire off every play, there's exponential returns. If you have Miles Garrett, who's just launching, you know, when you look at what Big Ben at the end of his career was just calling straight dropback and two running know david Castro was a college roommate in Mine. Right. And you left a half eaten tum in his car when you did that interview. Yes. And he would be like, if Miles Garrett just gets a launch off every play, we're we can't we can't let him put his hand on the ground, get the white knuckles, and launch off. We have to make him think at some level we're going to come at him.

Yeah.

And so there's diminishing returns. And that's the funny thing about analytics, is it's still learning the game of football, is that we're still trying to be able to identify, okay. What is real and what's not. If we just chase that North Star, you'll be like, why doesn't every team just run the same offense that Shanahan and Patrick Mahomes run? Well, they're always going to be a top. Unless you can draft Patrick Mahomes every year, which we know multiple teams could not draft Patrick Mahomes.

Thank you.

But you're not.

We could.

You could.

We didn't.

But now look. Look at all the air Raid quarterbacks that have been drafted since him. And then one of the things I loved about Mahomes is my biggest stat with him is Baker Mayfield left. Kyler Murray wouldn't go there to transfer with he wouldn't go and take that spot when Cliff Kingsbury, who was his guy, went there. And then Davis Webb also left. So, like, his best stat wasn't his game or whatever. It's all these other first overall picks or second round picks that got beat out by him. Right. But you can't chase that from analytics standpoint.

Right.

You have to find what makes you great. And what makes the 49 Ers great is they're able to surround Brock Purdy, a guy who can execute the game almost as well as anybody. Just a game plan with amazing talent.

Right.

But are they going to be good in the playoffs if they get down two touchdowns?

Right.

Their offense is built around having a lead. So they've gotten better, Shanahan's adapted, but there's all these different things that you can't just be Patrick Mahomes.

Yeah. You can't just throw in on every down.

That's like, why don't you just be Patrick Mahomes and run his place? Or why don't you pass every down? Because that is analytically, most efficient. Because you'll have diminishing returns.

Right? Yeah.

You also can take credit. You like, danced around a second. I want to give you credit, though. You had Patrick Mahomes as your number one quarterback in that draft.

Absolutely. I always did. Never thought about anything else.

Of course, you'd be an idiot not to.

Yeah.

I also had Brady as a first rounder. Smart.

Oh, nice.

Smart. I was like twelve years old, but I had him as a first rounder.

I had USA over Russia in 1980.

That's awesome.

Yeah.

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Him up every morning.

You're like, Andrew, how's the arm feel today? Could you step out there? Do you think he could step back in and play right now?

No, I don't think he wants to. He has to play a certain and so, and he doesn't want to. He's like super dad. So we go to the Stanford tailgates. We still talk about Stanford football all the time. He helps me with both the models and prep for every game because I want to go out there if I want to talk about a quarterback or a scheme know, I want to make sure I'm doing it. You know, half the time he's like, you can never say that. I could say that.

You can say that.

But he still loves the game of football. I just think that's passed him by. I still think he's the greatest player of all time. You guys didn't get to see it.

That's a spicy take. I like that.

Yeah, no, about that. He could do absolutely everything and would do anything for his teammates. Best leader. We had his last year at Stanford, we had only two captains. Now college teams have like, eight captains. We had him and Michael Thomas, who's on the Bengals now. And it's like he was an unbelievable leader. He would do everything from the moment he stepped on the field at Stanford, even with Toby Gearhart and all these All Americans, he was by far the best player on the field as a freshman. Actually, there's a funny story. There was a weight gain competition. Harbor had a weight gain competition. First summer there, Andrew got second to me. So he's listing off the names and he goes, Andrew Luck, 15 pounds of blue twisted steel. Look at it. Andrew, stand up, turn around for everybody. And Andrew's like and then I got next. It's like Sam Schwartzein, 20 pounds. I don't know how much of that is. Blue twisted steel. Stay down. But he would do anything for the team and then he can make any play now. I think so much of football is scheme, coach the teammates you're surrounded with.

Look, could he have won those Super Bowls with the Seattle Seahawks and Russell Wilson if they switch places? I think so. I think if you put him in the right scheme in the right location, he could done anything on a football field.

Yeah.

What about it's been a pet project of mine. We've talked about it as well. Downfield laterals. Designed downfield laterals in the NFL. We've seen it a couple of times this year. Houston did a really cool one on Sunday where CJ. Handed the ball off, then ran like an outside option route, got the ball pitched back easy, first down. Am I insane? Is this just something that I'm obsessed with, that I'm ultimately wrong about? Or am I on to something that if coaches watch more rugby tape they can figure out how to safely implement, design downfield laterals and greatly increase their offensive efficiency?

So much of the rulebook is not being utilized almost thing and we talk about passing teams couldn't think you could pass 60% of the time.

Right.

There was just a stat.

I think Andy Reid could. Right.

Sam Monson put it out there when he was at the Eagles. It was like Andy Reid was laughed at because he passed more than he ran in the red zone. Yeah, it's like 15 years ago. It's like there are these things that aren't taken advantage of. I am a firm believer in a downfield lateral because it's just you need to practice it. Why ever put a Taysom Hill in a quarterback? Or Darren McFadden? Why would you? The wildcat Ronnie Brown. Doesn't make any sense. But it's manipulating the defense, something they haven't prepared for. Gives you opportunity. I am 100% on board. I actually put the double forward pass in one of the rules. In the XFL.

Yeah.

I love that it screwed up, like, every data thing we try to do, because it's like how do you calculate a forward pass that hasn't been like it's not the end of the forward pass opportunity, but it was to try and make laterals and get coaches more comfortable with ladders to ultimately get to these downfield laterals. Because it's such a unique part of the game that especially if you're talking about explosives right now. Teams are struggling to get explosive plays. The defenses are letting you move down the field and then let you fail in the red zone.

Yeah, scoring is down. I think it's going to be the first time scoring to be down in like twelve years or something.

I was trying to chase 50 total points scored because I was the NFL average in 2018. That when I was making the rulebook. I was like, how do I get the game faster but also reach 50 total points scored? Now it's like 45.

Yeah.

It's crazy because teams letting that happen, they're stopping the run with six guys in the box. You're having these run stuff specialists. And so downfield laterals is a great way to create explosives. And if you fail one time and then you limit them to a field goal, football is a drive based game. You're going to have between ten and 14 drives, maximize those drives, try and have explosive plays. Parker Fleming, I think you guys have used his data before.

That's a war. Yeah.

Shout out, shout out. Parker Fleming, he has, like, the echo, which is how often are you getting good positive drives getting to the opponent's 40 from your side of the field, but also, how many explosives did you have flipped field touchdowns? These are all different things to help you, like and the downfill lateral is probably the next way that we're going to see more of these explosive plays.

Thank you.

Thank you. It's like any innovation with football, I agree with PFT.

I always thought it would work.

It's just coaches are scared that if it doesn't work, they'll look like idiots. It's like how fourth and one used to you always punt on fourth and one, and then slowly but surely, it's like, oh, I won't get criticized for this. Okay. I can go on forward on fourth and one because it's as stupid as it could be. But that really is kind of how innovation happens, where coaches have to feel comfortable with not being completely blasted for their decision making. And they're like, all right, now we can do this.

It's wild to me to see some of these single back runs. No attached tight ends, like the Eagles are running. No attached tight ends. It's like we were running that in high school 15 years ago. Yeah, but that's what needs to happen. Like, the Wildcat was a high school offense. Gus Melzon was running it. Then it gets put into college football, right? Then we see them in the NFL. Now it's fizzled out, but there's some remnants with Taysom Hill. These coaches need to go back and watch a lot of high school film because that's where you'll see innovation take place.

Yeah, it trickles up.

It always does.

Or it might take just some coach who's basically fired that they know that they're going to be fired by the end of the season. And just to be like, you know what? Let's fuck around, have some fun, doesn't really matter.

And play with house money anyways or brand new coach. You have a four year deal. Like, I talked about this all the time with my coach of the XFL. I said go for it on every fourth down.

Yeah.

I have nowhere in my business plan to double pay a coach. And if to fire you, I have to pay two coaches.

Right.

You have two year deals. If you have four year deal, coaches should be going for it more because it's hard for a coach owner to go, I can't wait to double pay another coach.

Yeah, I mean, whoever coached at the Raiders next should actually try to do this because you're not going to triple pay a coach.

You're not going to have offset. Mean, the Niners were paying four coaches at one point between Harbaugh, Thomas, Sula, Chip Kelly, and then the first year Shanahan. Shanahan can't get right. Like there's only so much money, right?

No, it's a good point. It's just all fascinating. Everything you're doing is awesome. I want to go back to one thing. You mentioned Vic Fangio. Why is Vic Fangio the best? Because I obviously didn't go well as a head coach, but some guys are just not meant to be head coaches and they're just insane. Defensive was on. He was a defensive coordinator for the Bears when they had a great defense a few years ago. Feels like everywhere he goes, the defense instantly gets better.

Shane SCove made a nickname for him called Lord Fangio because we called him the Dark Lord because he's like we had the worst passing defense in college football the year before and we had four Sherman. You know, he's going to be a hall of Famer, one of the best corners ever. He was on our team and we were just getting torched. We were running cover for every play we get. Fangio and he was a mercenary. He didn't get out of the team hotel. He never bought a house. He was the original one and done. And he was just so meticulous about finding unique ways to beat defenses or offenses. And one of the things in practice, in training camp, it was awful because we would have a protection call and then he would call Blitz to beat that protection. Then we'd stay up till 11:00 at night and we'd be adding new calls.

Okay.

If we see the safety walk down in this gap, we're going to call Stinger. Stinger. Stinger. That's going to shift the protection. Then they're going to hear Stinger and go through. And so probably about like two weeks of this, he walks into our O line room, he sees our coach's hairs all crazy, and all of us guys were like, pulling our leg hairs out to stay awake. And he goes, what? Are you still working on that Swiss cheese 58 protection? And he just reveled in just ripping us apart. Because he was always willing to look for a new thing and he was one of the first coaches to do the three four with four three spacing. So you'll see a lot of stand up DNS, but it'll look like a three four, but really it's four three spaces. So you're getting different body types in there, make it a faster defense, being able to do more zone blitzes. He was one of the first zone blitz guys, I think, when he was at Carolina years ago when they were expansion team. So it's like he's willing to do a lot of different things. And I talked to him a little bit last year at Stanford tailgates.

He says when he's given people the defense, he hasn't given everyone everything. He still has kept some stuff in there. So he's still a little bit crazy saying, I got a little bit of the special sauce. Even guys I've coached, I haven't given them everything right.

What about on when they bring up the AWS stats for catch probability, they'll say like, Devante Adams, 11% chance making this catch. You guys just make that up, right?

No. Next gen stats powered by AWS has a ton of great people working there. Guys like Keegan Abdo, Mike Band, Connor Quiston.

How do you do? Like 11%. He's going to make this catch.

It's a stack rank. So that's one of their stats and they're looking at what makes all the hardest passes. The further you throw the ball, the harder it is. How much distance is there between them and the closest defender distance to the sideline. And you stack rank all these things and you look at every pass that's taken place over the past few years and you're trying to evaluate what's the likelihood of those passes based on all these different attributes, then you get there. Now the thing is, it's completion probability and so it's not taking into account who that wide receiver is. And that's something I've learned from Data this year, is I think having superstar wide receivers changes everything because they are that other part of that catch. And if you can maximize those tara McLaurin, he's like the best at tight window catches. Mike Williams if you can maximize those guys to make catches that your quarterback either doesn't have to be perfect or nobody's open and you can get a positive play out of that. It's extremely valuable.

Or even I think one of the most underrated things that we just completely look past for wide receivers is, like, their body control against the sidelines, where it's like if you asked my body to get 2ft in bounds in some of the positions they're in, my ABS would rip and I would just fall flat on my face. The way they're able to manipulate their body and keep their core strength while they get 2ft in bounds is out of this world.

Yeah, the fact that it's 2ft at the XFL, i. Made it 1ft in bound because I was like, I got to get these trick, these crazy catches. And there's probably even more amazing catch in the NFL. The talent level of the top wide receivers in the NFL to the rest is probably a bigger disparity than people think. When people everyone thinks about O line, it's so hard to find alignment. Those guys that can run a 4344 and do those body control catches, those are the special specimens in the NFL. And we've seen what happens of just moving AJ. Brown off the Titans and onto the Eagles, how it's changed the fabric of both organizations. One's now in first place all the time. It's one guy who gets maybe ten catches a game.

Yeah.

How has that changed the game so much versus his gravity, making it easier for everyone else as well as break in case of emergency, then go to AJ. Brown. It is a game changer to have a superstar.

There was a play in the Cowboys Eagles game that was just so perfectly, like, summed up AJ. Brown. It was an incompletion, and it was, maybe we should put it in our best incompletions of the year. It was a deep shot to AJ. Brown and he was triple covered. And I think that Jalen Hurst is just like, no, at least once a game. I'm just going to see if he can make one of these crazy catches because he probably will more often than and like, it didn't work that time, but he's that type of player where it's like it doesn't matter if he's fully covered, he can still make a play.

Calling the perfect play every time is impossible. Harbaugh actually used to have this quote that was funny. He was like, hey, if you look at your playbook, none of the plays are scripted for five yards.

Right?

They're touchdowns, all of them. So if you just do it correctly, you'll score a touchdown. But the reality is getting a guy open, making sure you can predict it, because they have superstars on their team, too, and you could go, Screw it, I'm just going to launch it to AJ.

It might work, and it probably will.

And then also, like, pass interference, spot foul is the only play in football where the offense doesn't have to do something good.

Yeah.

You get to have that opportunity. There's fewer of those calls now because of the in phase rule change last year, but that's still an opportunity for you to gain some yards. And it's like, my guy's down there. I'll trust him.

Yeah.

Do you know who the all time goat is in terms of throwing pass interference?

I actually think it's Eli Manning. I did a research study on this about five years ago. The two Super Bowl seasons, they were two standard deviations, meaning very high away of first downs by penalty on third down. So that is like, the nerdiest stat I could give right now. But those two Super Bowl seasons, they were like astronomically more and it was because I think he was just saying Mario Manningham plex go Burris. Let's just make something happen.

Under throw him just a little bit.

Yeah, we were hoping you.

Flacco is the one everyone knows about but if we want to go sneaky into the tape and the data eli Manning is one of those guys that is sneaky part of that. But Flacco is like known for carson wentz perfected it at the end of the and that's another thing about trying to track these stats. EPA gained by penalty or first down by penalty. How you can manipulate that or putting yourself into high likelihood of not converting by penalty. Those penalties can change the fabric of the game. There's maybe like six of them per team per game but they are game changing when they happen.

Yeah.

Can you diagnose how to stop the Tush Push? You're like the smartest football. You love the tush push, right? You love it. You love it.

I do love the Tush Push because fourth down conversions is a big part of why I have a job. So I like it. Again, we talked about this. I had a similar play in college, 64 lead dive. We would hand it off but we'd have two upbacks that would jump over the top me into Castro versus the low shade. And as a center it is terrible because when we were doing it we'd have the collision and then our guys jumping over the top, their guys jumping over top, all landing on top of me. I definitely don't think there's a way to stop it in converting and that's not unique. In the CFL there's a 1 YD neutral zone. So QB sneaks are nearly guaranteed every time. They just have only three downs versus four downs. So theirs gets like a two yards every time. I think the Tush Push is so unique. QB sneaks in general convert at 72% of the time. They're at like 85 90%. With the Tush Push it's super hard to stop it and that's okay. I think that if they wanted to get rid of the play I wouldn't be against them getting rid of the no.

It's not the first time that the NFL rulebook has limited. There are rules in the current NFL rulebook against the T formation so they are limiting some formations you can already run. So it's not saying it's brand new that they would get rid of. It's not impossible. Want to stop it. He is leading with the crown of his helmet. But I support it because it's fun and it's fun to say Tush Push get a little Yiddish on the that's always good for me.

Did just mention that it might already be against the rules?

Yeah, because you're any quarterback, you lead with the crown of your helmet.

So I honestly think that if they got rid of it, the Eagles would still convert it like 90%.

I think they're better without the tournament.

Yeah.

It's not just a middle finger.

Yeah.

In college, one time we ran it was called incredible. It was a rush. The ball play called Power Kill Power against USC because Coach Harbaugh wanted to score more than 50 points. The earlier possession, we went for two to get to 50. Then we got the ball back and we ran the play all the way down because it was a big middle finger. Well, it was a big hey, you can't stop it. It was a middle finger. Yeah, maybe two. And that was like I think that's what they're doing mean now is they could run the QB sneak or they could run all their fun plays. The fly sweep off of it, a pop pass there's, all the things. But I think right now they take so much pride in it that they're just saying, we're going to do it.

Was that the play? Because you told me maybe it was the bowl game against Oklahoma State where Harbaugh called the same run play like 13 times in a row.

No, that was an incredible 2009. It was the what's your deal game. Pete Carroll came to him after the game, was like, what's your deal? What's your deal? Love. Stanford Athletics actually made a special ticket package the next year called the What's Your Deal?

Deal. Yeah. So that was that game where you ran it 13 straight times.

13 straight. We ran a play. It was very funny because Stanford, we had a very unique play calling system where it was a play, a kill and alert. So we had three separate plays. And then Andrew could get to a fourth play on every play. And that was like our unique thing. We'll always run the perfect play. And then for the Fiesta Bowl, we had 400 plays scripted. So I wore two wristbands and Andrew wore two wristbands. And then we ran one play like a goal line play in the middle of the field probably 15 times. It's like, why did we have all these plays scripted up? I'm like, we're spending four weeks trading for this game. It's like we're just going to run goal line offense in the middle of the field.

I love it, though, because that's so classic harbor. Like, we're just going to run it down your throat and there's nothing you.

Can do about it.

It gets me pumped up.

Smells weakness during.

The chaos that he brings. That did make it on edge. Like every guy on the team, but probably Owen. Andrew thought they were going to get kicked off the team at some point because it was just so much chaos. He would have us doing four hour practices and then sometimes he'd have us give it the night off. And so you never knew one night he actually planned we had a movie night.

Watch out.

You almost get hit by a mountain, got killed by a mountain. New office, still work in progress.

It's also Hank. He was just sitting there a second.

Yeah, shout out to Stella. But there was all harbaugh would give us the night off for a movie night. And so the rumbling started happening that we're going to get on their movie night. And then he came in. He goes, Anyone ready for a movie night? And we all start cheering. He goes, Nah, we're going to watch some good films. We're going to watch probably Oregon State and our DFO, Matt Doyle standing with all the tickets, like, uh oh, he'd already bought the tickets and already planned. Our boy just said, nope. You guys know the movie night's coming. I'm not letting you have it.

Yeah, that's great.

Who's one coach in the NFL right now that you think is, like, priming themselves to break out? Is there a guy that's not getting the recognition for whatever the circumstances are that you think could actually be a great coach if given the time I.

Love you know, I don't know how he is a leader, but from a play caller standpoint, his parents are both math majors, so he uses analytics and data. He actually coded a fourth down book for one of the teams that he was on when he was a young guy. And he's doing such unique things with the Lions. Part of me wants them just to keep the gang know and be, what if what if we were legends and brought a Super Bowl here? But Ben Johnson is if I were an owner, he's a guy I would go after as a potential head coach. Eric Bnemi probably deserves a head coaching job at this point. I think he's proven he can do enough and he does a lot of cool things. I mean, they take a lot of sacks there, but he's doing unique play calls. Those guys work probably harder than any other team, coaching staff wise, because the enemy is so committed.

Yeah.

No. Sam howe legit.

But I think that was more of a Ron Rivera positive thing. Coaching staff works hard.

I don't think my fiancee, Kelly, I have to give her a shout out to Kelly. I love you, but my fiancee's mom went to yeah. Oh, big simp. The biggest simp. Her mom went to high school with Ron Rivera. So we're a Ron Rivera household.

Okay, that's fair. But you should do, like, an on screen analytics for Ron Rivera in terms of time spent on camera not saying a single word.

I can't unsee that. After you started talking about and he's.

Been more talkative recently. I saw him twice on Sunday. He was talking, which is a record for him.

I think he misses Cam Newton because he's doing the towel thing that Cam Newton does. Sometimes I'll put the towel around his neck and I'm like, I think he misses.

Yeah.

He does. All right, I have one last question. Rowback question. Rho back. Use promo code. Take 20% off your first purchase. Qzips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts, everything. Rowback.com promo code, take. Do you want to give us a Super Bowl pick? You watch the games. You're dialed in more than anyone. You're watching all the film.

What does your computer brain say about this?

Yeah, give us the computer picks.

Baltimore.

Yeah.

Complete team.

Yeah. They might not get to my ears.

It's probably the easiest thing to do is like, who's going to get the first? Who's going to get the buy? The buy is so valuable and then home field advantage is so valuable. But they might not because their entire division's in the playoffs right now. But Todd Monkin offense. I'm a big Greg Roman fan, Coach. He was a coach of mine. But Tod Monkin has taken Lamar to the next level. Lamar is playing at a different speed, but the fact that their defense is playing and shout out to Roquan Smith. Maybe sometimes you should pay inside linebackers who can do a lot. But I think you had this great concept, pay your best players.

Yeah. If you have good players, keep them.

Everyone talks about you can't find good players in the draft. It's hard to do that. But if you do it, you might.

Want to keep them, hold on to.

Them, even though maybe not pay inside linebackers. But who knows? Now the middle of the field is such a big place. People try and go. We see. Fred Warner roquan Smith. Those are great defenses. And their best players are you know, I think that yeah.

I mean, that's another classic. Like, it wouldn't have worked for the Bears.

It wouldn't have worked.

The Ravens are a professional organization, unlike the Bears.

Yeah. Analytics organization, too. Great there, but yeah. I thought you were going to ask me who the most famous person my cell phone was.

Oh, yeah. Okay.

Who's the most famous person?

Andrew Luck.

Yeah.

Give him a call.

Why isn't he on?

Right. Yeah. That was the whole.

I mean, you're a day one. AWL. So I think you've been promising Andrew.

Luck for seven plus years.

That's true.

Yeah.

I actually didn't set this up. I should have set this up.

He can come throw football with us, play some catch.

He's going to be very mad about this.

He's not going to pick up. He's not going to pick up.

Didn't DeCastro call you, Sam, and said.

It was Andrew Luck?

Well, all right. My old boss is going to get upset at this. He didn't pick up. Maybe he will call back. But when we set up the DeCastro interview I had set up, this is very 2016 with a soundboard. To have the most famous person phone be Hulk Hogan. And I would be a Hulk Hogan soundboard. Very excited. I had booked a conference room, acting like I was in a sales meeting. That's incredible. And Andrew called me because he used to not have an iPhone. He has an iPhone now, so now we text more. But he called me. He's like, hey, man, I set Dave up with the part of my take. Guys, don't call him because I know you're going to call me, and then you're going to call him. That's your goes, okay.

Okay.

So then I'm getting ready to do the thing, and I finally get the call from David, and I'm ready to do the Hulk Hogan thing. And you guys acted like it was Hulk Hogan.

And then you're like, hey, motherfucker, you.

Trying to prank us?

We're going to prank you back.

And then when I listened to Andrew, just, like just like, going through the motions, called him during the podcast, he technically had him on.

Yeah, we had him on, sort of, but this has been awesome, man. We want to have you back on. Break down the league there's. Long overdue. Long overdue. Everyone watch prime vision. I can't recommend it enough. And you're getting great as an on air personality as well.

Thank you.

Me.

You told me, Please smile last year.

Yeah, because I think there was a couple of times when you went the first time, you're like, keep watching.

Let me know. And you were like, just so serious.

I was like, Just mix in a smile. Show people you're having fun because football is fun.

You like this, right? That's what my producer says before I go on. You like this, right? You like football?

Yeah, football is fun. It's crazy how much people watching other people smile or laugh is, like, infectious. And that's basically the genesis of the show, is having a good time with your boys.

Yeah. I found you guys. I used to read both of you, but then the podcast was because every young man's life you're going through, and you're listening to local sports talk radio.

Yeah.

And they had an actual argument over because I lived in the bay. Who's more important to the warriors, steph or Clay? I was like, you cannot be serious. The answer is clay plays.

He's the finish defense, and he doesn't waste up all the time dribling.

And then you guys started the podcast, and I was like, this is what I needed. I needed my palate cleanser from local radio.

Yeah.

That's such a great discussion to have, too. It's great because you can make yourself feel so smart by finding reasons why it's actually Clay, and then you're just rooting for yourself at that point, filling air.

It's like, no, it's the guy who can shoot from half court that the video game had to make him worse at three pointers because it was unfair in the video game.

Right. And it's like just having those sports debates but being like, we are dumb, and this is a dumb debate makes it a lot more fun.

Oh, yeah. That's why you guys are the best.

Yeah. All right. Well, Sam, thanks so much, man. We appreciate you coming by.

Sam Schwarzenegger was brought to you by Chevy. That's right. There's a new family with unstoppable grit, and they are the official partners of the Pardon My Take family. That is the Chevy Silverado ZR two family. Family is everything. Football is family. You got the Harbaughs, you got the Ryans, the Gronkowskis, the Longs, the Watts, you name it, the Hockules. Football is family. And there's a new addition to the Chevy Silverado family. It's the heavy duty. ZR Two joins the franchise to make Chevy ZR Two the only truck brand with a full lineup of trucks for wherever your offroad adventures take you. They have exclusive multimatic DSSV dampers, rugged, mud terrain, tires up to 14 available camera views. The Chevy Silverado ZR Two and Silverado HD ZR Two are a family with commanding and unstoppable grit. I am personally a Chevy owner. I love my Chevy. I went out, I bought a Chevy intentionally because I love the cars, the trucks so much. It's a great car. You're going to love Chevy. Head to Chevy.com. Check out Chevy Silverado and the family of Chevy ZR Two s the official trucks of part of my Take.

All right, let's wrap up Fire Fest of the week. Hank?

Yeah, we kind of covered mine pretty extensively. What was it at the beginning of.

The podcast that you didn't do your job?

I did not do my job.

That's very unbill belichick of you.

I could get it is. Some would say it's very Bill of me, though.

Do your job.

Yeah.

Factor fiction. That's the one mantra they've had. No, I'm saying Bill e. Oh, bill e of you. Gotcha.

So there's that.

That's good.

Deflection. Anything else?

That's it. That's it. You're just apologizing.

I've lost my laptop again. You guys hid my laptop?

We did not hide your laptop.

It just disappeared under the lottery ball machine.

That's where you last were, I guess.

Other fest, big cat. There's only one person in this room that's gotten the lottoball correct, right? So wouldn't that stand to reason that's where he would put his laptop? Like, I have no reason to be.

Over at the also who snitched.

Old interrogation tactic. I just went up to Max was like, I know they had my laptop. And he was like, How'd you know?

What the fuck, Max? You're so stupid. You're like fucking dumb bird. Well, I wanted him to do his job. No, that was the point. He was just going to not do his job. You didn't even tell me. And they were going to shame him for not doing his job, and that's the perfect crime.

But then I tried to be like I tried to play it off. I tried to be like, I lost my laptop. Max just snitched on me. He's like, no, you didn't.

I told you where it was.

Oh, yeah, you double snitched. Well, I didn't want him to have that out.

You're narc.

Why?

You're a narc.

If you ever get trust, Max yeah.

You're going to sing.

Hey, don't say that. Yeah.

You also didn't even tell me.

I was just sitting on the ground.

Cross legged, and I looked to my.

Right, and I was like, why were you sitting on the ground?

I was like, Why is there a.

Laptop underneath the lottery ball machine?

So it's not even like you trusted me with that information. Yeah.

Also, I guess my other mean, it's it's not really firefest. I think it's funny to an.

Whole.

The whole Tiffany Gomez. I took a couple harmless pictures kind of as like a continuation of the podcast. And it's been stunning how much people seem to care about that.

No, the rule of the Internet is if you take a picture of somebody you're fucking.

Yeah, no, but yeah, that has been a little bit of a lot. I've had a lot of people reaching out to me from all walks of life that are like, what's going on?

I'm like nice.

We're just pals.

It's been but now new chicks are going to be like, damn.

Yeah. It's like Travis Kelsey. He's been pictured with Taylor Swift a lot. He just stepped up his entire game for after they're no longer a thing.

It's true. I like the private life. Private. It's been a good last couple of years doing that. And I kind of dipped my toe back on the other side, and I realized I don't like it.

Okay. PFT. Your fire fest.

Yeah, my fire fest is so I'm still dealing with a rib injury. And I went to the doctor last week on Friday, they gave me an X ray. They basically told me I was a bitch and said that I had, like, a fractured cartilage thing or separated cartilage. So they gave me prescriptions, and I've spent the last week trying to get a prescription from a pharmacy that rhymes with mall greens and pharmacies.

Yes.

They just don't have prescriptions anymore.

There's drug shortage steal.

It COVID of everything.

COVID.

So I couldn't get my prescription. And then they told me the doctor didn't call it in. The doctor called it in a second time. I went back to Walgreens, wait in line for another 45 minutes. And they said, yeah, we still don't have the prescription. So I had to wait till Monday to call the doctor back.

Silk Road.

I call her back on Monday. That's right. The doctor's female. I saw the shocked look on your face, hank, you sexist.

The doctor is the mother.

My doctor quit.

Oh.

And so now so sick of you. So now the other doctor that's there is like, yeah, I can't give you that prescription because it's for controlled substance, and the previous doctor wrote it. So just kind of rub some dirt on it. So I haven't really been sleeping well, because on my side, my rib hurts. It hurts to breathe. Sneeze Laugh so what's wrong with pharmacies in America? We don't carry drugs anymore.

China.

Yeah. I've had ADHD my whole life and have had prescriptions my whole life. And it was an absolute war when I moved to Chicago. Trying to get it, like trying to.

Get it it's China.

It's easier to get a gun in Chicago than it is to get a China. I just I just want to fall asleep. Let me sleep.

Sounds like you're abusing pills.

I haven't had the opportunity to I would love to be abusing pills right now.

They know you're going to pre abuse.

I'm doctor shopping.

I had the same thing where my doctor sent it in, and then I went to the pharmacy two times, and they were like, your doctor never sent it in. And I would talk to my doctor.

And they'd be like, we sent it in.

And then I went, like, a third time, and they didn't send anything else.

They were like, oh, yeah, we have it.

You just haven't picked I'm like, what's going on here? Yeah. Would you get prescribed for idiot pills? Technically, yes. I also have had Add my whole life.

It sucks because I'm actually at the point where I think that pharmacies are a racket now.

Yeah.

Where they just try to get you to come in to pick up your prescription, knowing they don't have the medicine, and they just want you to buy all the other shit that's in the store. It's like, oh, while I'm here, because I did that last week, it's like, while I'm here, I need some milk. Might as well pick up some milk while I'm here, I need some Magnums. Might as well pick those up. Normal stuff like that.

I once had in college, I had a convenience store guy. I went up to get NyQuil, and.

The guy looks at me and goes, let me guess.

Magnums. Oh, rock.

Yeah. Did he have a tip jar?

No, he showed up.

He should have tipped the fuck out of him.

I think about that a lot too.

If you're in the service industry, the fastest way to get a quick tip is, whoa, you look like you had a huge dick. Well, I got to give this guy $20. That was great.

All right. My fire fest. I'm just tired. Really tired.

Me too.

Football season just wears us down. I'm at that point I have a.

Fire fest that I'll give you an out.

Well, it was already your turn.

I was doing my fire.

Big Cat.

For you. No, for you.

Okay.

I have one for you too.

What? Yeah.

Does everyone in this room just think.

Of I'd be the same one ways.

That Big Cat fucks up all the time.

The fuck did I do?

Actually, I have one for you too.

What did I do? You missed.

Pronounced the mississippi State coach wrong.

Oh, fuck that guy Sid. Yeah. So for people who tune in the Barshall Invitational thank you. I called Chris Jones. Chris Jones. I said Chris Jones over and over, and the Sid came over to us and was like, hey, you're saying his name wrong. And then the guy didn't even realize. But then Dave spent the next ten minutes just blasting the Sid. He's like, this fucking squid. So it was awesome. Thank you.

What's my day for their help?

I do not care. That's not my fire fest, by the way. I also did oh, that might be my fire fest. I fell in love with Mississippi State basketball so much, I put a future on them. $2,000 to win 300 grand. They can shoot the three. Shoot the three. I was like, damn, this team is good.

Team in college basketball.

Might be that. Arizona State.

Three points.

If Michigan State had Mississippi State's outside shooters, they would win the championship.

Yeah, for sure. What's mine? Hank.

You owe me $1,000. But I will.

For what?

Rescind that out of my bad performance today and lack of for what presentation? We made a bet on the Joe Buck episode calling the DeMar Hamlin incident. We made a bet where you're like, I can't wait for this new lottery ball machine. I was like, I'm going to get it first. I want to bet.

Oh, fuck.

We did a $1,000.

That's fucked up.

That's what I'm saying. I'm going to rescind it. I actually, as a token, we have.

The old lottery ball machine. I was gonna bring it back in to New York, throw this one away. This one's worthless. Also, I guess my real fire festes are right let me back. Was that was me getting triggered by being tired. I was going to say something really mean about Pete and the fact that he can't come, but I didn't. The fact that we built this whole office and the fucking rims are 10ft two inches is driving me insane.

It's throwing off my whole jump.

We went to Wind Trust last night, and I shot around. I hit everything. I was like, it's crazy. That's the worst fire fest ever. Because everyone's like, oh, you built a fucking office with basketball court. The rims are a little off, but.

You can lower them.

Those are real problems. I don't know. I keep asking, how do we lower them? How do we lower them? We called the guy. We called the guy. Just fucking Pete's trying to do the.

They'Re not that low. Yeah, they're not that high.

It's like, dude, it's 10ft. It's hoosiers. Ever seen it, Max? After this, maybe I get on your shoulders and I just jam and lower myself. He's nodding his head. Speak, Max. It's a podcast. All right, Jake. Oh, you spoke too much. No, you didn't.

This has been a weird episode.

Weird episode.

I feel bad about my performance.

I'd like to. Apologize.

I think you gave a great performance.

I've had fun. I want a clip of both the Colts Patriots preview and the Jets Raiders preview. Let everyone know how our football intellect is going.

The suit that PFT so generously bought me a few years ago was big a year ago when I tried it on and it fit last night.

Bad news?

Oh, yeah. I've been thinking, you've been getting fat.

Cake marsh back, maybe.

Maybe mixing a salad.

But now we have an office of the basketball hoop, so I'm going to sweat more.

Jake did go fucking turbo mode in Dodgeball. That was sick. Alpha, alpha.

He looked like he was in the Matrix.

He just went and was like, I'm going to kill everyone.

It's the Jake trix.

There's another stream today, right? Football. Home run Derby.

Tune in. Yes. Tune in. Yes. So we're going to start streaming stuff. It's a work in progress. I think everyone's going to love them, but we're testing them out. So right now we're testing them out. Just running them at the end of the yak. Soon we'll be doing them all on the vivilis stool streams. We'll be doing them on the stool streams, YouTube. So we're testing everything out. It's tested progress.

You have ideas, let us know.

Well, for everybody. Also asking about the baseball stream that we did, the video we shot last week. Max is working on that. It should be out. No, on Friday.

No Friday, max.

No.

Memes just, like, won't let me talk.

No, it is not out. It is not going to be out. Oh, wow. Really?

Correct.

Why not?

There's multiple reasons that we don't have to talk about.

When are we doing your fucking stream? 24 hours. Oh, wait, it was supposed to be on Thursday. Should we do it Thursday? This upcoming Thursday? Yeah, because it's Ravens Bengals. Thursday Night Football.

It's a really good game.

That's a really good game.

This is my last week with no tattoo.

Are you? Really good game.

I think we should do it this Thursday or next Thursday.

Well, no, next Thursday is Thanksgiving, is it not?

I'm down.

Yeah, I think we're recording early.

Thank you.

That Tuesday, right?

I think we should do it this Thursday.

We got to sit down and sit down.

What?

Or we could do it next Monday. Eagles, Chiefs.

You can still watch the game, right?

We'll figure it out. We'll figure it out.

I think he should get to listen to it on headphones.

We'll figure it out.

Voice of Eagles.

I can watch the voice of Eagles.

Okay, we'll figure it out. But it would start Wednesday night at like, 10:00 p.m.. And then we just run it all Thursday.

I'm down.

Sounds good to me.

Who are we going to have narrate over? We need to get Frank back out here, though.

For what?

Him to just narrate, like, two to 06:00 a.m. His sleep.

We're going to talk tomorrow. We'll talk tomorrow.

Okay? All right. We'll figure it out. All right. Numbers?

1817. 820.

77.

Three.

I'll go five.

Shane has ten.

Shane has ten. Hug has five back. I know it. 66.

Love you guys. Love you guys.

I don't know what I say.

I'm saying anyway, today is a my day to find you.

Shy away I'm coming for you love.

Of

sand me the better they don't make me silent silence, silence sun.

It'S a better.

Dream. That's how it.