Happy Scribe Logo

Transcript

Proofread by 0 readers
Proofread
[00:00:01]

Welcome to the Criminally, a podcast, I'm Holly Fry, and I'm Maria Tomoaki. And together we're exploring the intersection of history, a true crime. Our first season of the show is all about lady poisoners. Sometimes women take power for themselves and sometimes they do it through murder. But how many were just misunderstood? Join us on criminality as we untangle their stories on the radio app Apple podcasts or wherever you listen to podcasts.

[00:00:30]

The Gold Club was the top strip club in Atlanta in the 1990s, with patrons like Dennis Rodman, Michael Jordan, Madonna, the king of Sweden.

[00:00:39]

But in 2001, the club was put on trial with charges of prostitution, extortion, credit card fraud, racketeering and an affiliation with the mob. I'm journalist Christina Lee, and I'll be taking you behind the scenes of the Gold Club scandal.

[00:00:55]

From the beauty and bubbly to the deceit and courtroom drama, listen to Racket Inside the Gold Club on the I Heart radio app, Apple podcast or wherever you get your podcast.

[00:01:09]

Hey, fam, I'm Jada Pinkett Smith, and this is the Red Tablecloth podcast, all your favorite episodes from the Facebook Watch show in audio produced by Westbrooke Audio and I Heart Radio. Please don't forget to write and review on Apple podcasts.

[00:01:26]

Let's do this. Divorce touches everyone. My own mother has been divorced three times. Yeah, three divorces. I met Wil as he was splitting from his first wife. I love the Toni Braxton.

[00:01:41]

She's one of my favorite song. Is one of your favorites? Yes, this is exciting. Table Talk has become one of my favorite shows. It's going to be the realist. The most honest superstar.

[00:01:52]

Singer and multiple Grammy winner Toni Braxton has endured health issues, financial struggles and a painful public breakup from her husband of 12 years.

[00:02:02]

Only thing missing is a martini. That's OK. There is a martini to talk about divorce.

[00:02:09]

The D word surviving divorce. This one here is my boo. Yes, the Toni Braxton, she and I, we talk a lot about all kinds of stuff. We came across the subject of divorce. Yeah.

[00:02:29]

And, you know, gay has been divorced three times.

[00:02:32]

You got to do it. Did you get it right? No, you you're right. I hated being divorced. I hated everything about it. I hated having to surrender to the loss of everyone. You know, even with the acceptance stage, I'm like, no, I feel like a loss of waving the white flag, my husband and not because that's what keeps that husband Jesus. My ex husband, Terry, was one of the founding members of Mint Condition.

[00:02:55]

Pretty proud.

[00:02:56]

OK, so you were for that day. Yeah, that is one of my favorites. Yeah. So you guys fell in love and had two beautiful boys.

[00:03:09]

The part that I found really interesting is the idea that you went from being divorced from being husband and wife. Yeah.

[00:03:16]

To boyfriend and girlfriend.

[00:03:17]

Yeah. My husband became my boyfriend. Right. And we were attempting to salvage the relationship again.

[00:03:24]

We were hopeful and we dated for a good year and a half, almost two years after we got a divorce.

[00:03:29]

I immediately I know I sound crazy right now because I'm actually one of my husband's propose that to me as well. I just didn't think it was a good idea.

[00:03:38]

It was cutting the cord slowly like the song.

[00:03:42]

And before we snipped, it still hurt badly. It felt good.

[00:03:47]

Did the kids know you were dating? I don't think the kids knew we were divorced.

[00:03:52]

Oh, I thought we were going to get back together and we were clever. At least we thought we were we'd wait till the kids would go to sleep and then he would leave.

[00:04:00]

Right. We'd be there. Weren't you just trying to figure out how to salvage?

[00:04:05]

Because that's the thing. How do you salvage what's still there, which I think is important specifically when you have children, we assume that maybe the kids won't notice.

[00:04:15]

When you get older, you go with the kids know everything, right?

[00:04:18]

They do. I felt shallow because my husband, ex-husband and I broke up for money issues. That's why you guys broke up. I found out I had lupus at the time. I couldn't make money because I had lupus and had to cancel the show. That was my personal contribution to the marriage feeling.

[00:04:34]

I got it. Because who wants to take care of a person who's sick all the time? He never said that, right? I felt it.

[00:04:40]

I remember a few times being in a hospital, he would come later in the day or maybe the next day. And I would think, oh, he's not coming because I'm sick right now.

[00:04:48]

I never really talked to my ex-husband about it. I probably should have. But if I'm going to be completely honest, it was money was just. The decoration on the tree, the tree itself was I felt because I was sick, he left. So it gave me made me insecure. Why? I always felt like if I didn't get sick and I could have continued to work, we wouldn't have had that deficit. It wouldn't have shown his face, I should say, and we would probably have still been together.

[00:05:17]

Got it. Yeah. Wow, that's unfortunate. Yeah.

[00:05:21]

You know, the red tape, a lot of red tape for the red tape makes you emotional when you get the talk about it soothing at the end of did you have to pay alimony?

[00:05:36]

Yes, I had to bail. I was just one of those girls. This is a couple of us. It's me that I know of is Britney. No, it's Howie. Mary is allegedly my I was very, very angry about that, but it was because we had an existing prenup and post.

[00:05:56]

Now then what made you angry about it? If it had already been an agreement?

[00:06:01]

Because I wanted to renege that I'm going to be honest about marriage. I thought he should say no. Wow. Even though if it were reversed and a guy had more, we would expect him to make sure the ladies OK right back that. And so I can't really bitch about it too much. Right. However, semicolon. Right. Whoa, tough.

[00:06:26]

That's a tough pill. Well, in my divorces, I never get nothing from nobody. Never ask for nothing from nobody pulls. You had to pay somebody. That would be you'd be mad. Hey man, I was just what I was and I'm not doing that. That I mean, I went through this phase I of to new bitches right through that whole thing and.

[00:06:47]

Oh what I that's how I feel. That's what I was so angry about. I figured out the best.

[00:06:54]

So I can pay this debt for me personally, I'm not mature enough to have a divorce, I'm just not I don't think I would ever be mature and I don't, because when you have to start going in breaking up assets, you oh, I mean, you're right there when you start to divide things, separate, cut off, let me tell you, that's when the red table turned upside down and it won't be red no more.

[00:07:25]

This job will be smashed in shambles, like you say. I don't know. I actually think it takes more maturity to stay together and re define and redefine that much already. I do have. Yeah, you understand. Like, I know what I can do and I know what I can't. I actually have more maturity to figure it out within and work with what I got.

[00:07:50]

I've seen people who try to have some of the most friendly divorces and it just at some point it's it's still painful, is still painful.

[00:07:59]

My parents are divorced after thirty four years.

[00:08:03]

That was really tough on me and all my sisters and my brother.

[00:08:06]

They don't like each other. And I still still. And then sometimes the children feel divided even at my age.

[00:08:15]

I don't want to love my dad too loud in front of my mom.

[00:08:19]

That's the toughest part. Oh and like I said, I'm a grown woman.

[00:08:24]

My parents divorced after thirty four years. I was thirty two and my parents got a divorce and my parents divorce because of infidelity and my mom felt complete betrayal.

[00:08:33]

The woman in me understands what my mother's going through as it was one thirty four years and ago. Go with someone else.

[00:08:39]

That's trail you kill your dad.

[00:08:41]

I mean so far, one year even now. Today, if my dad and my mom are in this room, know my dad does little things, a little cheap shots and try to make my mom feel some kind of way via us and then my mom would do little things. Talk to your dad today. We don't want to see you.

[00:08:58]

We talk to our dad or my mom. Right.

[00:09:01]

You know, those kind of betrayals, which is they can be deep, hurt often. Think if my think if my kids are going through something in school with their grades, I would say my kids are doing this because of the boys. That was the hardest part for me.

[00:09:16]

I was blaming myself like I shouldn't have challenged the relationship. I should have just stayed in it and made it work and figured it out like I always do. How did you get past that guilt? Every day I still struggle. Because little things come up with family, with children. What were you doing in college in your early 20s? Probably some partying, hooking up with that cute someone desperately trying to pick your future career and maybe even spending some time finding yourself.

[00:09:49]

Yeah, me too. In season two of your young rocker, I tell the story of my own early 20s.

[00:09:56]

It's a raw, honest, strange and entertaining story about how we all end up becoming ourselves even when we try to be someone else. Hopefully your journey didn't involve getting sucked into a cult, running away to an island to be a made for billionaires and lots of shoplifting. But that's what happened when I tried to give up the one thing I love more than anything playing music. Join me Chelsea Erson for Dear Young Rocker Season two. Dear Young Rocker is executive produced by Jake Brennan of Disgraced Land and comes to you from Double Elvis Productions and I Heart Radio.

[00:10:31]

Listen to Dear Young Rocker on the I Heart radio app Apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Heidi Murkoff, host of What to Expect, a new podcast from My Heart Radio when I first wrote What to Expect When You're Expecting. My mission was simple to help parents know what to expect every step of the way on what to expect will answer your biggest pregnancy and parenting questions about everything from preconception planning to birth plan. Newborns sleep to toddler tantrums.

[00:11:09]

Motherhood is the ultimate sisterhood, but it can be overwhelming if you don't know what to expect. Listen to what to expect on the I Heart radio app, Apple podcast or wherever you get your podcasts. You had something on one of your shows, which I love is one of my favorite shows, and you said that we don't realize we have children, that everyone comes with issues from their childhood.

[00:11:35]

Yes. Yes.

[00:11:36]

And I said, I'm giving my children issues right now. I'm giving it to them back here to play. Here it is right there. A deficit in their lives like myself. But this deficit, I'm giving them that.

[00:11:47]

I'm adding to their pain. And I hate that for my children. Did I scare my kid? Is this the moment that I scarred him? It's a tough thing as a parent, you know, trying to figure out your happiness while you have children. No know responsibility. You feel towards their happiness.

[00:12:08]

What would you say you've learned?

[00:12:10]

Because when I look at your divorces, you know what? Here's the thing, though. I make fun of do I make. But it gave me a lot the fact that she's been divorced three times. But I'll tell you something.

[00:12:24]

You've actually had evolution.

[00:12:27]

She has. And this is why you can never judge people's journeys, OK? OK, but she's had evolution. So my father was abusive and they were young. OK, so that wasn't going to work.

[00:12:39]

That was no shock for anybody.

[00:12:41]

I wasn't I was in high school then where the door was with Tony.

[00:12:45]

Yeah. I actually did not want that. You didn't want the divorce. You wanted the divorce. Right.

[00:12:50]

Why didn't you fight it? He didn't want it. Like, I'm not going to fight to be with someone that doesn't want to be with me. We're both had issues with drugs and alcohol. The marriage would not have lasted anyway. And that's the thing. And then you got clean, right? And then Paul came into your life and he was such a stability, you know, but as you grew in your sobriety, you grow in that.

[00:13:18]

And people can't always come with you but doesn't make it bad. Right. You start a relationship in one way. These are the things that I want out of a relationship. And at that particular point in time, two people are in agreement.

[00:13:31]

Then you grow or you don't grow.

[00:13:33]

People change and then people's capacity can't always keep up with the change, whatever that might be.

[00:13:42]

I'm beginning to see that right. Because I didn't at first, because I'm old school.

[00:13:47]

I'm very Disney. I love, love, love everything about being in love. And I'm going to try to we'll see you on the floor because I just know that I just didn't give up. And Paul and I, we hung in there a long time. We were together over twenty years. It wasn't easy, but it wasn't a nasty divorce. I can remember flying home from somewhere and just being angry because just feeling like we could have had such a great life together if you would just.

[00:14:22]

If you would just be better, that's the way you always want somebody to be something something other than who you were. And I think that was really. The issue for him is that you don't really love someone if you're trying to constantly change them. I just don't think he really appreciated the woman that I was. I did not want to go through another divorce. I really didn't. My sister passed. I had a cousin that passed and I was like, I can't do this.

[00:14:55]

I can't. Life is too short. I have got to be happy. And I was just miserable.

[00:15:00]

Partnering is a lot more than romance. Yeah, it has a lot to do with survival resources and just having somebody or somebodies by you that can help you figure it out your.

[00:15:17]

Yeah.

[00:15:17]

Everybody needs that, you know, and it's only for you to decide on how you need it and who you need it from. Pritch, I remember you asking me one so that we did with Wills.

[00:15:28]

She was like, well, why don't you just divorce? One of the ideas for me is that we've built such a beautiful community.

[00:15:34]

We've built such a beautiful family and our survival. We do well together and then breaking that group and community up.

[00:15:43]

For me, it's just never an option.

[00:15:45]

I was just like, no subtraction, right?

[00:15:49]

You need to go right ahead. But I don't see the necessity for that. I didn't think about that idea with my last divorce.

[00:16:00]

I never talked to anybody and the family after that.

[00:16:04]

Speaking of survival and group, since Paul had been part of this group. I feel like I have my relationship with Paul and my kids. The only grandfather they've known, whether he's been an ideal one or not, because in their mind. These people now she has her ideas about it, but then they have theirs.

[00:16:29]

I have appreciation for him, too, because he came into my mother's life at a time where I was grateful because I was like, she's good. That earns him a spot at the table forever. I didn't see the necessity for it.

[00:16:47]

That's what I love about your situation.

[00:16:50]

But that's what I love about the situation, Tony, is that even though he he might not have been the ideal husband for you, that you still worked at family, what was been your process in that?

[00:17:04]

Oh, it has caused friction and some of my post situations because holidays cost me the kids and their dad. So you guys do do Christmas and Thanksgiving, Thanksgiving and holidays together. He's an extension of my family, not just because he's my kid's dad, but because he was a part of my life. So we are family now.

[00:17:29]

Right. And it's kind of tough blending families. Sometimes it gets difficult. Christmas morning, waking up and my baby dead is there, I find a lot of things I do for them. There, boys, I don't know how to raise boys, right? You know, I can teach them how to be a good person, but I can't show them how to be a man. And then we have your new fiancee, a new fiance. We are complete opposites.

[00:17:56]

His name is Brian Williams, but most people call him Birdman. And we've been friends for 16, 17 years. The turning point in our relationship was when I got ill and I was out on the road touring and he came to every date, every night.

[00:18:11]

He was there on the bus behind me every night. Just to make sure you wasn't sure I was OK. That's amazing. I felt someone was there with me.

[00:18:21]

What would you say that you've learned most out of that whole journey with Carrie from the dissolve, the divorce and then the recreation of their relationship?

[00:18:32]

Yeah, well, I'm still learning, but what I think I've learned most is that surrendering doesn't always mean defeat. We will always have our children together.

[00:18:41]

It was a successful marriage that lasted 12 years, and that's what it was supposed to be. That's right. It doesn't have to be infinity. He's in my life for infinity forever.

[00:18:50]

But that stage of the relationship does not define who I am in the future.

[00:18:55]

I think that's a beautiful way to look at it.

[00:19:00]

We're going to bring the fish bowl up the fish bowl. This is the fish bowl, like from our viewers. You down with black hair, you down with abolishing the prison industrial complex, you down with puppies, who is in jail with Puppy? You'd be surprised where the comedy group Obama's other daughters.

[00:19:22]

And we're inviting you to come kick in with us on our podcast called You Down.

[00:19:27]

We're bringing you the same fun vibe we served during our improv shows in L.A., only in podcast form. Check in with us as we discuss everything going on in the culture and have the nerve to give our UN expert opinions to a lucky listener.

[00:19:41]

Whether it's embarrassing hair stories or comedy fails, we might even talk about ghost.

[00:19:48]

Listen to you down on the I Heart radio app, Apple podcast or wherever you get your pocket, you download.

[00:20:00]

Over the years, host Erin Manque and the team behind law, unobscured and cabinet of curiosities have scoured the globe to bring you tales from the past with a hint of darkness, from superstitions and folklore to the curious and the bizarre. But now it's time to bring that journey home, because while America's history books are filled with people, places and events that sit on lofty pedestals, there's a whole other world of American history that waits for us in the shadows tales of unlikely heroes, world changing tragedies and legends that are unique to the American spirit stories that we call American shadows.

[00:20:37]

Each episode is handcrafted by the Greyman and Mild team and narrated by me, Lauren Volcom, and while we might be traveling some dark and lonely roads, you're also bound to learn a thing or two along the way. Get ready for a tour of American history, unlike any other. Get ready for American Shadows. Catch new episodes of American Shadows every other Thursday, listen on Apple podcasts, diet radio app, or wherever you get your podcasts. Monique from Nashville for Tony and Gammie, what did you do with your wedding rings and dresses after getting divorced?

[00:21:14]

I kept them all.

[00:21:16]

Wow. Everything good for you?

[00:21:20]

Let me know. I'm just doing along the way. No, no, no.

[00:21:24]

I didn't have a gown because the first two times I got married in the courthouse, we just had a big reception afterwards. But in my third marriage, I actually had two sets. OK, yeah. And he wanted both of them back.

[00:21:41]

Did you give them back? I absolutely did. Why? That was what we had talked about. If we ever got divorced, we never signed a prenup or anything. But and he he always said he wanted it back and no, he didn't get those back. He married. If you were engaged and broke it off, let me say they're yours.

[00:21:59]

Maybe Elizabeth Taylor and me, but I wouldn't have. No, those are mine. You gave them to me. It was one of the contracts. I just like to look at them sometimes.

[00:22:10]

Poof. Monica from Washington for telling me what's the most important thing you've learned from your past relationships that you know will help you with your current one. That's a good one.

[00:22:24]

Oh, I will say communication.

[00:22:28]

You got to be honest. I got to talk. Yes.

[00:22:31]

You feel. Yes, but you got to feel free to do that. I didn't have that in my third relationship. I don't think we were really, really friends.

[00:22:44]

And I think that is so important. I feel like now I'm married to my best friend. Yeah. Katie from Memphis for Toni.

[00:22:56]

You are now engaged to a man. Did you ever consider just being in a relationship instead of a full legal marriage?

[00:23:03]

OK, I don't think they don't want me to be one to be with it, but I'm used to people saying that because they don't get it.

[00:23:11]

They don't know him like I know him. I get it.

[00:23:14]

You get it. I do. You willing to have a bus follow me while I'm on tour to make sure I'm good?

[00:23:22]

Yeah, I can't argue with that commitment. Yeah. That's just that's that right at that. Yeah. And I ride with that body from Virginia for Toni. Your sister Tamar is the voice as well. What advice would you give her during her divorce.

[00:23:36]

Um, nothing. Got it. Just be happy. Yeah. Be sure, because once you pull the divorce card you say I want a divorce. Yeah. I can't take it back. Yeah. That's my red table dark. Thank you, sir. Thank you, thank you. You, too. Thank you so much. Thank you.

[00:24:00]

On our next roundtable talk, Jaiden, I have the same father, different mothers. And he told me I'd rather get hired and be your father.

[00:24:09]

I asked you, why didn't you just toss me to the side when you don't need people to be something for you? That was my aha. Moment of utter forgiveness.

[00:24:23]

Get in that game. You know, I got short arms.

[00:24:26]

I'm here with my friend. Told Braxton I should be sitting next to her. I think it's going to.

[00:24:39]

And we had a good show. The boys did. Hey, with table talk, family head to our table, talk Facebook, watch show page, join the conversation and become a part of roundtable talk to join the red table, talk family and become a part of the conversation.

[00:24:55]

Follow us at Facebook. Dot com slash red tabletop. Thanks for listening to this episode of Red Tablecloth podcast produced by Facebook Watch Westbrooke Audio and I Heart Radio.

[00:25:10]

Dear young rocker, season two is a raw, honest, strange and entertaining story about finding yourself in your early 20s and a lifelong relationship with music. It's hosted by me, Chelsea Erson, and it's executive produced by Jake Brennan of Disgraced Land. Dear Young Rocker comes to you from WLS Productions and I Heart Radio.

[00:25:31]

Listen to Dear Young Rocker on the I Heart radio app, Apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.

[00:25:37]

In this time of pandemic and revolution, do you find yourself frustrated at high levels of corruption and inequality at our inability to get basic things done at the persistence of systemic racism? You're not alone.

[00:25:51]

I'm Baratunde Thurston, author, activist and comedian. Our democratic experiment is at a tipping point, but which way we tip is up to us. Listen to How to Citizen the Baratunde on the I Heart radio app, Apple podcast or wherever you listen to podcast.