Transcribe your podcast

Hello, you're listening to Shackman annoyed with me, Rosie Ramsay and my husband, although I see my husband, I see it very loosely today because we just had an argument about three minutes ago. And to be honest, in those three minutes, I've been imagining my life with somebody else and it was a welcome relief. Did you have a podcast together? No, no, absolutely not.


That's where the happiest. And you why why start a thing with your new lover that ruined the last love fuck?


And how, again, is that age old thing of when we're getting ready for a podcast? You need cartwheels and screaming, Anani, just chill the fuck out and get ready to go Bullrun.


But you know what you are?


You're the podcast equivalent of fucking drunk is at weddings. Go on, get up and dance and stop being bored. Come on, come on, come on, come on. Come and dance with your money.


Jean, fuck off on Jean. Break your hip again.


I just want to have fun. But there's no one left. Rosenborg there's no phone.


Like, don't bring you down to the podcast, please. We're yet at all.


It's not all sorry. Let's go back to the episode of the podcast and find them a few weeks where you were just pregnant and a twat and fucking you opened every episode with I'm fucking sick and I hate my life. I'm not anymore.


Hey, hey. I was a pretty short cryin. I kept you going you bloody.


As soon as I'm down a bit and I can't be around this. You came down this morning, you were like a car.


I'm not going to be around you today and you know, just take it when the going gets tough. Yeah. Fuck off.


Yeah, but the roads sing a fucking loser.


Right. However, then, guys, thank you so much for listening. Look, if not if they to listen anymore, where they go, where they're going, they've got nowhere to go.


But even though literally they're on the phone lines in Mommy, daddy, stop fighting because they were kids.


Yeah, yeah. Now, guys, honestly, if you're up on on cloud nine today, well done for you. If you're down in the dumps, well done for you. A lot of well, but you know, we've got to crack on it is episode 103.


Thank you so much for continuing to, like, unsubscribe.


Love that you do not. And before going any further, it's time for this week's lucrative, lucrative sponsorship.


Go to this week's sponsor is. Yes, yeah, yeah. It's topical.


It is great talent. Someone who is clearly having an awful time and has probably lost work and really struggling with the mental health during a lockdown that you actually quite enjoy.


Lockdown, get in bed, get in the Fokin, see, read the room.


You utter utter a piece of garbage.


Oh, it's me. Is I actually.


That's a sponsor. Yeah I. Oh have you. Oh you. Oh you know been at work for you and you're a bit sad and you lost all day. Oh well you know what I've quite enjoyed lockdown Falconbridge.


The room we are closed down.


We asked if you can live in lockdown. Right. And you think it's great that absolutely fine. I'm jealous of you. Fucking well done. But don't see it as someone who's just said the Havana shit, that's my problem. I'm not I'm not saying, look, if you if you want to if you look at a I swear, I saw people wear masks well before this.


It's read the room. It's when you speak to someone. I had friends at the beginning of it when all my got pulled and everything went, let's go doing it.


Just get like food delivered or not not just feed me house. It's meant I'm getting paid. Fuck yourself. Read the room.


That's literally like me going well absolutely. I'm going to someone I've just brought me Angel and I'm going, I'm just going to FaceTime you show you how fast I can run on the spot.


That's right. Let's get to the root of your problem. Annoyed about me. I'm annoyed about. That's what brought us down. Right. You know why? Because it's snowing and I can't even take Robin outside in the snow. You want us to take my only sled jesty?


And I fucking couldn't. I literally, literally let him go outside on his own. And I stood and watched out the window while he sat on the sled on a drive, not moving.


It's not a hill. It's not an incline. Blasim We'll spend that. We'll spend that university money next week because you're going to need that salt and flat ground, try to move on a sledge on his own.


And it just reminded me of when I was an only child and I didn't want to play with the snow fall.


Overeducated that issue. Yeah, well, you know, I just skidded out in the snow on his back. He didn't like it.


Well, I wonder what those scratches were. I know we've got the root of the problem. Just annoyed about me. Sorry, I'm just. It's hard, Chris.


It's hard times. Listen, it's hard times. And we've spent a good solid five minutes.


Oh, this is this year.


As a psychiatrist, you've had your pity party live on Chris Housley.


I'm not being funny, though. How do you get through life if you live in the state of constant sort of. Oh, it's it's not healthy.


So I like to have a little moment because I think it is healthy to assess the situation and go, this is utterly shit. But you know what, I know it's totally shit, but if I live in this world of shit constantly, I won't get out of it. So I need to get out of it. And yes, it is all sunshine, rainbows and me that bit. But it's all right. All I can do is that I've come and join me in that I'm coming.


I'm coming with. Come on, come with me later was my hands. Come on, come and join us. Let's have a lovely time. All right. Leave this here. Leave this here. OK, this shit. Right. You're not actually having a pretty good jingle.


Yeah, I've got. Just the one you it's wrote by me. Yeah, I didn't my friend Steph did it like did.


I'll give credit where credit's due. OK, here's the jingle. We had a fight about the jingle jingle. We could sing along to jingle jingle gong. So this is the jingle, jingle, jingle. We hope you like the garbage. Ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba. Hello and welcome back to Sunshine. Laughter Happiness days are here again in sunshine and for five minutes. I've got to say, shaking my head annoyed the Ramsey and Christopher Ramsey.


Yes. You know what it is? The jingle up and just just getting it all out there in the first picture, just as I do feel a little bit better. We'll finish that in a little run, a little shout, I feel in sunshine and I'm getting a tan. Look at this. I'm going to hold on.


What? I'm not getting a tan on my left foot. Is this a big fucking bootleg because I stop it and walk on me now, which is good to walk around the house, you already do.


I mean, Gonzales, it's very frustrating for me personally, because for the last, you know, three weeks or whatever when you did it, I did tell you every day it would get better as long as these you were adamant it was not ever going to you know, that you were just going to have a go.


God, no. You know what made me happy?


I'm starting again. I heard in the shower. Yeah, I heard in the shower. I thought you were in pain, but, you know, not not want to hear it. So I told you this before, but I'm in another room and you just start belting out a show tune.


And I don't realize it's about what happened in the store. I run into this stuff happening. I do immediately fire the worst. Like the killers just came in and attacked you in the shower. I can't sing quietly.


I've no, I'm a proper beltless.


You know what I was thinking yesterday, actually, you were singing away and I was in the kitchen. I could hear you. And I was trying to do a bit of work and I was just like, oh, God. And it was lovely. I love your singing. You know, sometimes when you can't concentrate, just remember that scene, you know, when The Goonies, where slots tied to the chair and his brother was just gone.


You got to thinking the Fed is just fucking screaming in agony.


Felt a lot like sluff a lot like him, just like I mean, I'm just like losing my shit.


That's that's the worst thing anyone's ever said, really. Well, we've got we've got we've got a good forty minutes left out. But I'll say I love The Goonies. I can't wait to show the boys The Goonies. It's going to be the thing where the thing at the will thing a child think oh shit the my.


I think Robin would enjoy the bit you know, when it's what he called chunk chunk and he's ice cream and he's explaining what it is like.


That's the thing.


I think films like my dad said to me, like all these are and you're going to love this godfather was the only one I actually loved try Lords movies. And I was I was like, fuck this. But there's only one book. It's a classic. It is.


I put the gummy bears on Robin yesterday, not having it here. What's this shit is really strange because the graphics are rubbish.


Look what the watch now man looks like back in the day when we used to call me Nana is incredibly mightly and she put it on and I'd be like, I don't really want to watch this.


We had a color telly, Joe. I mean, it's like but it's the same thing, but it's it it's it's in black and white.


I'm worried that Robin and Reef might not like Marvel or Harry Potter, that they'll not be getting in the door.


Honestly, honestly, they live in the shed. They're not going to like it either. They're going to just be like, I'm not I'm not keen on them.


Well, the problem is Robin's currently watching a thing on Disney plus.


And it's like all of the superheroes called Superhero Squad, and it's like a fucking every Marvel one, Izidor, because this is all of them in one go. This fantastic for the X-Men, The Avengers, they're all in one is you going to watch Marvel and be like wise? You know why Spider-Man not appear until cut a civil war? I don't know. I fell in have with them will say, oh what real. Not like anything.


I like myself reminded of an all my word.


Meinrath could watch the back catalog of Real Housewives. Imagine that.


Not a that that is honestly not cruelty to Children report. I had a thought yesterday. Yeah. What would you do if they ever did a Real Housewives of like Newcastle.


Could I do it. No. Why one would live in Newcastle would have in South Shields but at the don't live at the place where it is the living.


So there's even more lies in it. The fake drug free fake tits, fake lips, what's gone on.


Live like an hour outside some of them. But could I, would you let us do it?


Oh, definitely not be horrible. I just I just just think it'd be awful.


I'm sure Paddy McGuinness, his wife, was on one series of shows sometimes, and it was just alone. Yeah, she's the main one. I called him everybody.


But now that just cameras, I don't I just know they don't go to our house and yeah, it's not as intrusive, as intrusive as ours would be.


I don't like it when you turn your Instagram camera on me as you what you love doing is getting fully dressed up. I know when you come downstairs first, if you've got a show and being fully dressed I know are better.


I make myself scarce according to me here, because I know there's going to be fucking cameras shoved in my face because I'm fine with it.


Yeah, selfish to be honest, I don't ever think we could do a reality programme people see all the time. Oh, we give you a reality programme. Robin is not well well behaved enough.


A reality programme. Now the people that keep all the shit in and he just looked like it. Did a nanny spin off the door. Yeah. I always think about them kids in Supernanny. Bit harsh innit.


Like what do they think of that now looking back, you know, and how what's when the first the Supernanny and how old were the oldest ones to be now.


Oh they'll be like twenty now do you reckon. Yeah. Oh probably love to chat to one of them.


I know. It'll be interesting to think you find it funny.


I don't know how I feel. I would feel worse for the parents, though, because it's always like, you know, we watch dogs behaving badly that day and literally like the dog doesn't go on for walks or give them a kick halfway around.


Are you fucking mad? That was wonderful. But it's always that it's always like I give me Sonidos.


He has his bad time. Red Bull, you know, these bad times. And then what?


Unnim, Supernanny, Jo, Jo, Jo, sleep expert, both midnight. And then he's up for what we're doing wrong and.


I've got an idea. And I'm not a nanny. I mean, like I said, I think it's the parents who'd be more ashamed than the kids just being kids.


You can't judge them, though, because this retard this shit is how I told you not to. And I don't know how I've I don't know. I'm sorry. I don't know who I'm speaking for.


If you're Kneeland, home schooling, Fokin, well, nobody needs to know. How are you doing? Unbelievable. I'm sick of it.


Well, let's just take a moment to talk about how I have always said this. Even before I had children, people who homeschool mental. Oh, do it.


Actually, like I remember saying to me, mom, when I was younger, like when I found out what it is I was like around school, my mom just laughed at me and was like, absolutely no.


I never understood it. Never understood one. How you got the patients to y three Y in Y.


So yeah, I've never understood it and I don't even I don't even have respect for them to be honest.


I haven't met. They love another one, the people who homeschool the kids all the way through, but now it's like home schooled in the like nothing's changed.


But yeah, that well, one of our worksheets fuck, you know, I almost never understood it.


And you think now that you'd go.


Yeah, people who homeschool honestly, all the respect in the world know I respect them less because it's not. It's horrible. Why put yourself through that? You put yourself in an early grave.


Honestly, I've got I've got gray hair. I'm getting great gray hair. And just often being here all the time, I just get this kid.


I love him so much. That's the thing. That's the thing that people want to address. This, as you see, whinged about it online.


I'm sick of them. School children need to be at school. I think the do I call William Gortney school one school. He's missing out on so much.


But there's a subsection of people going, oh, well, shouldn't have had kids then, should you know? And I'll tell you why you're fucking wrong. If you think that if you're sitting there without kids and you're saying these people want the kids back at school and seeing the kids are at home, too much are wrong and should not. Kids, you're a fucking idiot. And I'll tell you why you're an idiot, right?


Have you ever joined a gym? Immagine. Join the not gym membership walking in and then fucking put two handcuffs on you, handcuffed to a treadmill, turned on your belt and go, that's your life now. And you go, I don't want to live on this treadmill.


Shouldn't I joined a gym then? Should you fucking prick didn't know where you were going with that. That's it. I mean, it was very expensive. I'm very recently. I'm very aggressive. Yeah. No, it's true.


It's I mean, we actually saw with Robin, we can see that you can go out and the bay pandemic did because we did. We had raised you in a pandemic. Yeah. Yeah. I mean we'll take this, we'll take the stay forever babies watch Netflix and and shit.


That's all we are. Yeah. So you watch Netflix you baby AZAPO you change it. Your problems mostly watch Netflix. We watched all of making a murderer. My problem was a baby.


Oh that was lovely. That was fantastic. I know because Robin while he was here but the five year old him wasn't a five year old him. But now the five year old him is here all the time.


All the time. Doesn't go anywhere. But let's just take a moment as well, though. The absolute head fuck that is this pandemic in home schooling and being home when he's not here because he goes to my mom's for a day so we can do this podcast.


So that makes him feel bad, crazy, crazy. What's going on? I don't know what's going on. I feel guilty when he's watching the telly. I feel guilty once on the switch. I feel guilty. What he's doing, he's home schooling. Something like this isn't good. I'm not I'm not teaching you this. And then, yeah, I feel bad when you go to your mom. And I said, I miss him. Sometimes when you go to bed, it's this.


What they don't know us.


They change. How are we going to go back to work properly?


I don't you you know that bag at the door.


That's mine. But shit pocket. I am ready the minute one show or anyone or gigs anyone rings, I'm gone. The ring is halfway through this podcast. My phone's on.


I'll be off. That is so funny because we had a we had a zoo meet with management about the tour and things and we still we have no idea what's happened with the tour. We're pretty and it's going ahead and that's how we live in life currently. But we had a meeting and I remember when I was pregnant, when I first found out I was pregnant last year, they were like, how long are you taking off and how is that?


Oh, well, I need time off. Like, come on, I'm having a baby.


I'm going to need, you know, like two months, whatever we were for, like four weeks old.


We were on the zoom and I was like, just anything I'll do anything on anything that involves getting on a train. Yeah, it'll be fine.


Like, honestly, I know all were mobile before your London office is open again. I'm going to the mccleen. I'll do anything.


We are so desperate to get back to work. It's it's the most tragic thing ever. Oh gosh. I haven't been out of the house work in a year.


Yeah, I know you saw why I should be more down than you know except for the taste of it.


I taste of it now. It's just I think it's just cos we've got a kid as well, it's like just to feel a bit raw would probably stop this because not everyone listening isn't in our position.


There'll be some people who are.


OK, listen, it's going to calm down.


Yeah, that's exactly the same. Here's another one for you. It's exactly the same as buying a barbecue, taking the barbecue home, having your barbecue, then going, what's the tea or barbecue again or what's for breakfast. Barbecue again. What's what fucking eating offer up. I don't want you if you don't have a barbecue.


I'm fucking sick of a double bedu barbecue.


But I've never told you this, but I just thought this might make you chuckle.


Might not even make them anything to make us chuckle. My my brother is doing ok. My brother is nothing like me. He's nothing like he's more not like me.


He sounds exactly like baby sounds like bas-relief. Yeah. He might actually be Bas-relief but I don't know plasterers just Solidere afloat.


He rang me last week and I haven't managed to tell you. This is like all these, you know, three day phone call. I got a phone call him, I read it. How are you doing. Keep in mind I got it all this kind of stuff.


And that's exactly how I am on. And he told us the most random stories I got, I've got a sleepless night and a baby and I thought you should see baby outside. So you got your clothes are right. Put your shoes on in that. And he was Ruhlman E Street for about ten minutes trying to find a baby. Right.


When he went outside and he was like, I couldn't hear the baby. I'm going away. I heard babies around the streets. Right, 3:00 in the morning or whatever. Went back inside, said he was already sick. I swear to God, I heard a kid like I heard a baby outside would eat in the police. You take care of the people upstairs. I've just moved in and had a baby.


Oh. Said, how did I not know this?


I was seven at the door going around the streets looking for the kid shot.


Your brother is the gift that keeps on giving. That's incredible.


I just want to hear your baby. But it's just why she lives in a downstairs flat on a block of houses.


Terraced houses. Yeah. Why would you assume the baby was outside?


Well. Well, because they live on the front. So their bedroom is on the front street, right.


Yeah, but then you've got to run to the right, to the left and open as possible.


Houses could be a baby. Chris, do you think he regressed to when he grew up in a house. Maybe and forgot forgot for a minute that you lived in a flat.


I mean, how dressed was he? How long at what point of getting dressed?


Did he not think that might not be coming from outside?


Fuck went outside, look at the snow.


No, it was necessary, but obviously, you know, when they're in when they're looking for this kid, you're going to and this is your kid or I thought you were going to say that is is his girlfriend was like, oh, I've just been watching a video before. And there was a baby on the video goes upstairs to the new neighbors and just had a baby.


Wow. Yeah. Well, nice one. Have Amadeu Babalu, Babalu, but it's been a babies.


Should we momentarily address the fact that last week in Germany we were Hayate figures?


Are we going to talk about that momentarily? Address. Let's address it. Just really strange. It was so nice. Not a day of German trolling.


So I guess we both got a day of sort of broken English.


Some of it was fantastic. Yeah, I'm not slacking off because, you know, if I was going to show that German, I wouldn't have to go on Google Translate. Absolutely.


Some of them may have done just broken English abuse. Yes. On Twitter and on Instagram.


And because you want to try to tell the story you saw when Raef was born, the lady came to do is here. And Tess, the nurse, came to do his human test in the hospital and handed me a little foam. And it's basically says if there's any sort of she don't even know how to see it because it's not like it was like at the top of the is slightly misshapen.


Yeah. Covered everything from like no air at all to a slightly misshapen. Yeah. And the hundred yet.


And it was that weird thing. One we were both looked more like well yeah.


What do you hasn't got, you know he hasn't got like perfect but I mean just perfect for maybe but the top physio was a little bit sort of different.


Yeah. And we thought we were allowed to look at your own baby, but it was just weird because we would never have done it if she hadn't wanted to form the form.


And the only thought you go you guys, you go right when he's 15, 14, if he comes in from school crying, is he being bullied by the years that we apparently could have got support straight?


We sorted it's like almost like a a straw, but the kind of people describing what it is.


So what they did was they put a little paper, almost tiny little piece of straw underneath the curve here and put a tiny bit masking tape on it.


And that was it.


And that's it. It's because babies cartilage in the years is sore that well, that's why it's misshapen anyway, because you breech. So you used to just be proper uncomfortable, just handfuls of it. Yeah.


So they do it this young stage. It's nothing invasive surgery, bit of like nothing like that yet.


And then they put a bit of tape on to tape it down and, and it was on for a fortnight. I basically said what we've just said on my Instagram stories and then I wasn't even going to mention it because there's lots of stuff happens in our family that we didn't mention, especially our kids, because, of course, you know, we don't have things in them.


Yeah, because it's for their privacy and stuff like that. We're very aware of that. But I had to mention it because, you know, we had full on masking tape all these years.


It would be like what's happened, you know, Vango after an election. So anyway, I mentioned it and the the newspapers picked it up.


Then lovely little papers, some lovely papers and and said that we'd like to get treatment and procedure.


They never explain what it was it just said. And it was like a photo of a sleep going. He has this he has that child asleep after the procedure, after a woman took a bit of fucking masking tape on his ear.


And the doctor, by the way, not woman.


Sorry, Doctor. Yeah, yeah, yeah.


So the baby then the talk that got lost in translation there and then a German some kind of German magazine picked it up but not got lost in translation. And I don't speak German, but I imagine it was something like look at these two fucking pellets from England getting cosmetic surgery on the BBC on a one week old baby. Oh, the hair was real, man.


Oh, my God. Believable. Crazy one. It yeah. I've never been trolled in another language.


It was a first. It was nice. It's good to know. So just in case anybody would just we weren't even going to mention this again. But I cannot live in a world where people think that we would let our one year old, one week old baby have cosmetic surgery on his years.


So absolutely not. It was it was masking tape like that, was it?


And to be honest, they look back now, isn't it? Looks fantastic. Yeah.


Yeah, it was. You know, if this little segment is sponsored by cosmetic surgery, but babies get in touch also is OK, I've got booked injuries, Botox next week. Good. You haven't done yet. You should probably.


That's that's the that was the irony of the whole thing. All these people. Well I can't believe you've got man. I was like I have never had any cosmetic surgery in my entire life.


Why do you think why do you think I would bypass myself and give it to me one week old baby, you fucking morons.


If anyone out there ever does actually get under the knife surgery and the week old baby. Yeah, I told them, I think absolutely.


Put foot. In fact, check it first, please. Thank you and good luck to you.


I have a double, double, double, double. The bull, the stories, the biggest personalities, the best accents enjoy series from across the pond with AMC. Plus looking for romance, a discovery of witches. Is your next obsession ready to raise the stakes? Check out what Entertainment Weekly calls one of the best new series Gangs of London. Want to get weird, doctor, who is definitely for you. Then there's the watch and exciting new series about a group of total misfits tasked with saving their world available through the platforms you're already on.


Watch the most anticipated shows from the U.K. at Free and on Demand. Sign up at AMC. Plus Dotcom, AMC, plus only the good stuff.


A better night's sleep is one of the best and easiest ways to improve your physical and mental health, and it's a heck of a lot easier than all this nonsense.


So even if you throw your treadmill out the window, you can put your body on a Nektar mattress and get the healthy sleep you need. Prices started just four hundred ninety nine dollars and you get three hundred ninety nine dollars in accessories thrown in a 365 night home trial and a forever warranty. Go to Nektar sleep dotcom.


Abdu ba ba ba ba ba ba. It's time for what you beat, OK? Oh hello Chris. Belinda you listen about me injections right. About two of them. Right. Saw the doors open. Right.


OK, one night you don't when you don't fall and you got them done just last week. Right. So thankfully we have to wait three months. So I might not be here on July.


He is hoping you by. Well, Slag pulled me down when not the worst thing you said is it was horrible.


Is it weird that I can smell when you do hair? Oh, when you do smell. I watched the video this morning. I my phone.


So how she got dressed and going on. No, well, I believe that when you do Belinda and just Morgan, she always got call. She has, yeah, she would have done everything. She only got one interesting.


She's only got one dressing gown up to lift and it walks to the towel on its own.


Yeah, I watched the video of someone today and I could smell that video.


What do you mean?


Just, you know, when you see someone and you think I can smell you. Yeah, I can smell what you smell like. True story, fantastic. So I'm glad Blinda still alive, to be honest, because, you know, she still she is I don't know if that's factual, by the way, to show you've got to wait some time after the final job done.


What is crazy?


Genuinely, it could have it could all be over. We have stopped watching the news completely. It was not all in the popcorn. Why is he so upset?


Was he on one of my gigs looking at an empty stage going, why is he always just fucking locked himself in the house, assuming these Barranco missed the pub so much?


Honestly, I missed the theater.


Oh, they had no support either.


They've had no help. Oh, no, no, no. Well, the first thing is, was it from from the beginning we noticed, like, no no way back soon.


Hopefully I'm coming in a bit of a laugh.


I'm feeling some positive coming in.


We soon my beef a big will pick of you always. But my beef with you this week is I'm annoyingly I'm like, if I said this before I'd come up again.


You like all of my things on Instagram.


Thank you. Supportive husband. You don't watch them.


I'm not. I'm busy. Stop it. I just support you just like they support you well, as opposed from here.


But then I said I said, Oh, did you like that video? And you go, I didn't watch it. And I said, Well, you liked it.


Well, yeah, but that was yesterday. That was because I'd been putting Robin to bed. And I think since Reeve was born, he feels like he's missing out. So I sort of sit in his bed with him until he falls asleep and I sit on my phone and I've obviously got on silent because I'm not going to watch you fucking sick because he's going to sit up and go watch that dog. So got on silent. So I just thought he liked it.


But that's that. Why are you complaining that I'm giving you likes on Instagram? You complain.


And how many people listening to this would die literally throw themselves in front of the bus for me, Chris Ramsey, to like a shitty Instagram post.


Ha ha ha ha. That I didn't think I was joking. Guys, I'm doing good karma.


I just hit myself in the teeth. Would be Glasspool the most disgusting thing you ever said? No, I just. Why like something when you haven't watched it, why give me a holler like oh I do like you.


I do like you know, I'm like I could, I could put a video on going.


Chris Ramsey is awful cuteness here again to me will please help.


And you would like it. Yeah. And then if I like it, it's obviously a joke is like that and then I keep it for longer. Not that I'd want to keep you fuck off.


What doors open is it. I going to go actually.


Where am I going to go. Where would I go do if we split up now.


Yeah genuinely. Where would I go. Oh God. Where would mean the kids go.


Oh actually hang on. Where would I be. Oh yeah.


I never understand that when the woman, when the woman leaves with the kids I'm like, did I get him out.


I always just think, how does he pull that off. Oh me too.


But it's literally like I don't mean sexist. Yeah. But what it's like. Yes, I mean the kids left.


I'm like Haisten. Yeah mate I've never understood that on this. Even this is how much of a dick I am, even if I was completely in the wrong right. Let's say I've cheated on you with like 12 different blokes.




In a couple of glasses just for fun on the first day of cheaters.


Yeah, I.


On the first 12 looks, on the first day of what my wife was, not shockingly, one traveling salesman, one little plumber, one brilliant joiner, three Royal Mail, a lot of folks who works in wigs, one had been a bogus one ended yet.


And the man at the end of the street, hey, Robin, Ted, Martha, the surgeon who delivered Raef when you said 12 hours.


Well, I've had a busy time anyway. Yeah. Even if I had done that. Yeah. Stole all the money, everything, I'd still be like, get you back.


Wow. I mean, the stuff you're admitting to is this hypothetical stuff. It's amazing.


I mean, I would if we could play any of this. Can you imagine if we got divorced and in the court we had to play snippets of the podcast?


I imagine it would be evidence. It would be. It probably would be. My God. Oh, that would be horrible.


But then, you know, what would happen would listen. It would be quite funny. Oh, I miss you.


And then you'd forgive me for all Michigan and we'd live happily ever after.


OK, I want to be with me. Are we still on?


Yes, I love that. I would a skip.


And my first of all, the fact that your mom would just reiterate I'm just summarize here that your beef with me was that I like your Instagram posts without watching you.


Without watching ridiculous. Absolutely. You know. No, no. That's called it's called support. No, it's called unconditional support and love that's given a present without a card.


That's ridiculous. What kind of tosser likes the card man you'd rather have so far said you I've got you a present. I'm going to call you Guatemala.


Well, now that we look after the environment in that I'm a bit more like Dobry about the card. But back in the day I used to take a lot of I used to like a card really too. I don't worry about it was a bad analogy. I'm not good analogy to right to amazement so far.


Jim barbecue in our can't leave anything. The analogy gives opportunity and hope.


They're OK. It's like sex with a fake orgasm. OK, then, from you know, Chris, I think I think it broke.


Oh, good. And my beef with you.


Yes, right now I am. I've got to be. So I let you know this is going to be like a goosebumps pick the next bit. I pick your random thing.


Right. I got one that's a bit more lighthearted.


You did it just before you started the podcast, so I actually wrote it down or I've got one that is going to go a little bit deeper. But the one that's going to be deeper, I do. There is a massive chance it will backfire on us very soon.


OK, well, we're laughing now, but we're on the verge, right, relationship wise.


OK, OK, let me take that and run press, although I'm all right in the press. I'm just your wife. Nobody. Ramsay's wife. That's. Can we just address that really quickly if the press want to do a story involving me. Right. Yeah. Just call me. Don't Chris Ramsey's wife is if you do it about me, at least call is by the actual name and not the book person I married. I am just known as somebody of that whole, you know, wish to get to these cocktails.


But I'm sick and court might be with you this week is right. Right.


Where you going with that street and straight. And you never wear that Chris Ramsay's wife name budget I bought you ever. You never went on the house. You never went to the shops. Sick of it. Good bloody money. I paid for that.


It's just sad because it's ruined and it's ruined in the fact that I used to, you know, like being married. Now I'm just it's like, wow, wow. It's like it's all I am.


It's all I know. Right. Come on, I'll put you down what it is.


Yeah. Lay it on is how are you how we die before you write that the gloves are off.




My beef with you this week and I'll may get proved wrong tonight, but my beef with you this week is you are constantly banging on about how hard it is being up all night with grief. You will not let me do the night shift because you just claiming that I can't do it. Yeah. And I've said to you, I'm going to come downstairs. I love the telephone. I love everything set out. And you are saying, no, it has to be done in the bedroom.


And I'm like, I'm not going to do it full time. I'm just going to give you a night when you have a full night's sleep. I want to do it downstairs. But you've got this thing where you're telling us you're not good enough. I need to do it. And then I say, OK, I'll do it, but you go, you can't do it. And it's like this weird catch 22 that I mean, we are telling us that I need to sort of thing, but you won't let us sort of thing.


Right. OK, no.


Well, hang on a minute. Your beef is invalid because you are doing it tonight. Your beef is invalid, you bitch. Take back your beef after shirt. Your beef is a trademark.


All think you are doing it tonight. But all I'm saying is it's horrible. And I don't think you'll be able to cope because you don't have very good coping skills.


And we learned this. We've learned this. And you know what?


Your coping skills are even worse when you're tired and you're going to be all right.


It's backfired almost immediately. That's all I'm saying.


And it's really hard. And you know what? It takes every ounce of you everything to not get, like, upset. Right. But you know what?


You get tired and it's really hard. There's a difference.


You put them down and then you lie down.


And the reason you get upset is because he's like weak and you're like Guantanamo will be sleep deprived because you you let them drift off and then you wake them up. That's how the torture works. That's how sleep deprivation works. You don't just keep them up, let them drift off. Then you are with them all assault on them. So you're just going to stay awake all night.


Oh, my baby pulling on a coffee machine on my order pizza. You hear the dog on at 1:00 in the morning. It's a pizza night all night.


I start the Mandalorian again. How long are you going to sleep? The next day. All day.


No, this is this is so rosy, honestly.


I mean, utopia. Absolutely, Soledad, because I sleep through the days and all the home schooling and all the depression. I sleep through all that. And then at night I'm open.


I watch what I want to tell you. I can't keep up and quiet all day.


You've got to like eleven o'clock. Would you accept me if I slept in the motor home? Yeah, could keep them out of the days, although could was that, you know? Well, why would you do that? Why are you putting Dick just crumbling straight away work? He's gone. He's out.


You know. He knows. He knows. You know.


Do you know, I literally actively make sure he goes nowhere near when you if you want to go upstairs when you're asleep, I'm like, know the amount of time you're like can we just couldn't stop him.


Chris five. I couldn't stop him. Did he overpower you.


And I only sleep into like ten eleven at the latest. That's all you're getting tomorrow. Jokes aside, I'm really proud of you two really well. And I wish I could have helped more because maybe I'll be back. I'll be back on a Chorley. OK, what you do tonight. You OK?


Oh, you don't know that. I know. I can't sleep all day tomorrow. I'm not I no you can't sleep. Seven seven. Tomorrow, yeah, it's like it's like 12 hours go to sleep, but it's dark, wake up when it's dark. This is the worst thing ever.


I'll just do it again. I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm fine. I got something for you. Instagram again. Apologies, because it's all. It's all I do now. Do you know how my insta stories usually depict? Is that the right word? About three and a half minutes of my day. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.


Three and a half minutes a day and then possibly post every day. So you see in the tiniest part of my life, really somebody's message yesterday saying, does Chris ever hold that baby?


I ha. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Do you know the other 23 hours and 57 minutes Lakmé?


People are free, man. I know what's wrong with every you don't know. So unfortunately, we are displaying this is why we couldn't do a reality show because people would be like a day. Yes.


Even if you put like ten frames up, that would only be one hundred and fifty seconds.


But and so for 150 seconds of the day, they don't see me hold them.


I'm like, oh, he's a chauvinist pig. Worst dad ever.


Just ever thought maybe he hey, if you listen, go fuck yourself and honestly message about God.


No, he doesn't.


But you did don't because I bet you did. You would do that and they won't know you're doing this.


A turtle does not make their way out. It sits on his backside. Abdu Baba Dooby Dooby.


It's time for questions from the public. He was from the ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba. If I may use the Cronan. So let's say I know you guys as always.


If you want to get in touch it shikwati no doubt Gmail dot com. Send us whatever you bloody like please. So amazing that you still send in stuff. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. They keep flying and pouring in. Will love it.


And it great saw me and I genuinely really enjoy doing this podcast. I know we've been slightly aggressive but this is me therapy like. Yeah.


You know if I, if I go on stage and I do like an angry rant about something, I'm not fuming. I'm enjoying it. It's the process of doing it, you know. I mean.


And can we I'm going to sound like such a good iboga, but podcasts are great. You know, they've been getting me through the night feeds at the minute. I'm listening. The Lord can't listen to me. True crime ones you in the night, though. No, I get a bit scared.


You made me whatever like you made me watch a bit of the thing you did on Netflix.


What was it the night the Night Stalker and I know and never.


What about the Night Stalker and went upstairs. Watch a bit more of it. And you squeezed all your juice into a cop and you went on record as a scientist.


Srijit Situational cop.


And you what were you go and put this to use in the fridge, please clock downstairs after watching the fucking I know the night or whatever it was, the night crawler, the night, the story of it, you know, but it terrifies is absolutely horrible.


I'm not going to watch any more of that.


Well, I haven't I haven't been listening to true crime during the night. I forgot to listen to something a bit more. Plus the problem, right.


With these three crime things. I don't watch horror films. I still haven't seen it. No, me neither. I do is a watch Babadook. And it were the two that I really wanted to see because I watched the trailer and I was like, oh look, I can't watch them. I got too scared and I live in my own head afterwards.


Yeah, like imagination runs wild, but you can watch one of them and go, Oh, that's bullshit. Never happened. But you watch one of them, you go, I'll never I'll hold out.


No they were not as they were real people. Yeah. Yeah.


Oh well you've got to remember though that was in the eighties. A lot of people didn't lock the doors and not slept with the windows open and stuff like that. So I think we're okay now.


Yeah, we were talking about this. There's not many serial killers nowadays because it kind of gets jinxed.


Forty. Stop it. This podcast got weird fucking voodoo magic. One of my sponsors was staying in state and for a year.


OK, what do you think we're going to get killed by serial killer? They'll probably be like, I will be like, you know, they'll be like Tenzer. You look at a store and they've been getting interviewed. Maguire will listen this podcast and he said the words you because we thought I will prove them wrong. Just be our look great. Just like well done. Well done before.


Blood on your hands. OK, go quest in here. Hey, Chris and I took a poll in the office there in speech marks, I don't work in an office and I didn't make an official poll. I just asked everyone within my workplace, that's kind of what they are.


So you don't imagine people properly? I mean, some people might with a little bar on gait either way, as long as you've asked everyone how it is. Yeah, my question is and I didn't expect this.


OK, do you chew your mashed beans or jelly? Oh, I make my mark as smooth as possible. I don't like lumps it on my mashed potato. Yeah, so I don't see the point in chewing it. I just kind of squish it to the roof of my mouth and swallow. Same with jelly, however. Beans, brackets. Now, this is strictly beans on their own, not a fork full of beans and something else, just beans.


I can't stand the texture in the middle of beans, but I enjoy the taste, so I swallow them whole.


Oh. Oh, okay.


That's not going to be good for your digestive system, can we?


However, everyone in my work is adamant that they chew all three.


Oh wow. What is it? I don't know if it's a matter where everyone in my work is adamant that they chew all three.


Some of them are fucking lie.


And it's so funny is that when your friends and I got work, they swamped, swamped the all the do a shit like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.


These normal folk who go out to work, they do fucking jealous of people who I know I'm sure be back in the U.S. and she here she to she, I don't know why he or she has a fork full of beans and swallows the beans like vitamin tablets, like paracetamol like this ofman.


I'm sure when I have been a couple of full ones you chew every single night, you keep saying, I'm so sorry. Sorry Mom. Sorry Nana. Tis the season. I'll get text. Not Dad because he doesn't listen. Thanks Dad.


That's really simple for you too. Yeah.


Yeah so do you. So should just he or she just doesn't chew beans at all but likes the taste of them. Now this is going to annoy you. So you know how I was a spoiled child. Yeah. My mom used to save me. Pallone's. Yeah. You know sometimes she used to serve beans for us so I got just the juice because I don't want to be that. Is that a joke.


Seriously, she's just beans because I just like the tomato sauce. The beans. I'm sorry. What's the point.


So if I had like if I was having like turkey as waffles and beans or beans also I just get some beans source in the side rather than what you would shoot.


Would you squash the beans then put them to serve.


And just so the sauce just came through. Such you know, sometimes you do beans in the pan or whatever. Yeah. So so, you know, I've got to be you. That's the most ridiculous thing ever bother that. And then she sometimes make spaghetti hoops instead.


But I like the sauce isn't the same. The same. It wasn't the same with the bean sauce. So you got all your roughage after you look dead when I met you, I've told you before, I don't know how I'm still alive.


I know I ate what I remember when I first met you. You were just pale all the time. Yeah, I remember.


I was like, you are pasty is is out.


I remember the first time you told me that that was nice. Yeah. You look me in the eyes and say you are pasty.


Is I don't you like by the way, I agree with the mashed potato.


I don't look at you mashed potato. I don't think you can do much better. You can't you jelly. You know, I love mashed potatoes. You must do a lot of hot, hot, hot, hot, hot it down.


My diet when I was a kid was atrocious. No food, not literally. No food, no veg. Me I don't fotopoulos before me lunches at school was a bread and butter and then like a cheese string and then probably a vanilla yogurt y chocolate bar and crisps. Wow. But you look.


Yeah look we weren't allowed, we were not allowed to leave the table until my brother ate it all his broccoli. Now honestly, can you imagine telling Tanuma to tell a nine year old that you I was not allowed to leave the table until my brother had ate all his vegetables and he hated vegetables. So I we'd all be sat there around the table and like me dad as well. Come on, come on. Eat them up and make it look like Kev, please, Kev, come on.




I've got I want to please we're going to play dream so you don't know what it's like.


No, not you do not know what it's like to be a kid who doesn't like it's about your mouth. It makes gog and stuff.


Christopher, but I think you'll find I absolutely know what I'd like. We all know what that's like.


I'm dub dub. Dub dub. Hi.


Rosie and Chris, please. Can you sell something for me and my boyfriend? Always. When I load and unload the dishwasher, I fully unload the clean stuff before putting in the dirty stuff. Obviously my boyfriend unloads one half.


It's the bottom drawer and leaves the clean glasses. Slash Mogs in the top load the bottom half with dirty stuff, then shuts it again. Please confirm to my boyfriend that this is quite clearly wrong.


OK, ok. Right. OK, I've thought about doing this before. What I have, what I thought about doing this before, but I now know now I go from the top down. He's gone from the bottom up. Right. First of all here you've got to go from the bottom up.


Tell me why. Because otherwise if you take corpses off, if you've got like a a morgue or something and you turn it upside down, the dishwasher, water from the morgue is going to fall down on the clean stuff.


Like it just doesn't matter. It's just water in it. No, but what? You've just cleaned it. You won't be clean. So you're on the bottom. Take the plates and stuff. Out I go. No, no, no.


We as I want sometimes I got to play it, I'll fucking wet or a bowl and they'll be liquid in my bowl.


Maybe that's just awful. So he but he that's I mean it's madness what he's doing and what it's like.


It's a Korean rice on and you flicking stuff around.


What if you end up with a little bit of masala and you smoked only it's the end of the world at least he's doing it. So then he just puts the dirty stuff in and then he'll obviously empty the top. It yeah. He's doing your system right. Well, for me that's easily that's an easy fucker waiting to happen, that's all. I momentarily took a phone call and now there's a complete witchetty Conconi in the cupboard.


Right. OK, but let's just clarify. You are one of the people where that would ruin your day. We had been done. We had beans and sausages on toast just for lunch. Right. We have beans and sausages for just in case.


I want to know we're doing well with Branston. Tenwick no, it wasn't shared. Well, it was half eaten between two slices of bread.


Anyway, I put the beans in sausages, in the microwave, manioc, and I hadn't put a bit of kitchen all over you. Honestly, you could hear it sizzling OpenNet, you know.


Yeah. Yeah. What, you haven't put it. You haven't covered this. She didn't cover the guys.


Guys she didn't cover. There was a bowl of beans and sausages right in the microwave. Right.


Just spinning round little beans just exploding everywhere. Bean juice all over the top of the fucking microwave. My mom's going to come round, spoon that for me.


So but honestly, I could hear the popping and I thought, why didn't cover this like a fucking like a little bowl, a hand grenade.


But your reaction was the most ridiculous thing ever necessary based on not covering them was ridiculous, in my opinion.


You should have covered them. Sometimes I'll do kitchen will underplay it.


Just, you know, then don't know what you mean. What do you think led the Dougie longer.


Doesn't care if. In a way, I haven't got very good microwave etiquette, I'm not going to lie, I'm not sure what you're allowed to put in and what you not, it's always just a bit of a guessing game.


Great. Absolutely great. It's the same as the toaster. I don't know why, but I know you're not menu. But when I've got something in the toaster, I just want to stick my knife in. That's just I do get Lockdown's don't know.


This has been forever.


Just want to stick me knife in. But I'm like I know that I'm not meant to do that because I think I've seen a video when I was little. Yeah. Of the you know, the firemen.


What do you mean you don't know what goes in a microwave. What do you mean like. Oh yeah. Can you put tin violin. No. Right.


OK, well there you go.


But you can just leave everything you get. Yes. But you can't put metal in.


No. Can you put glass in. Yes. Right. Plastic.


Yeah. Not all plastic. So. Right. I said I'm sorry. This is weird.


Oh my God. Oh my God. The ruler is right. Don't put fuckin metal in. And anything else that you're going to put in, it makes your microwave safe.


Right. OK, well this is like one on one. This is what your mom tells you the first time you fuck you like it. I don't listen.


I don't listen.


So it's been I've made it this far, let's put it that way. I've just made it this far.


So you're telling me right back to this guy. So if this guy takes a phone call while he's doing that, he's got your stupid system. He takes a clean stuff out and puts the stuff in before he's finished with all the clean stuff. If he somehow gets mixed up and puts like a plate in the cupboard with, like, a big ketchup on the corner, you know, some rice left over or whatever, and you pull it out if you got a plate out to go and make yourself some food.


And there was like week old fucking ketchup and shit all over the plate that wouldn't ruin your day happens all the time.


You know, a knife drawer, it's always better crewed on our knives and forks.


Always doesn't ruin me.


Did you do I put it back in the drawer. Oh, the dishwasher. Oh, I just grab it off. Do you know. Just drop it off.


No, I'll put, I'll wash it. I'll clean it. Yeah. So it was it got another bit here.


This one piece when you were talking about sharing towels, it reminds me of when I was about ten and about ago we had we started.


You know why those not. Well, because we don't know our ass from my elbow at the minute. So we all share towels left, right and center. That's crazy.


I was told. Is this does it smell like shit or dump? No, I love it. Yeah. Barton, come over here.


Why don't you remind us that people are all over it? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.


I thought I use I ended up know the three days that was what.


Yeah. Right. I did use the bit with the pizza.


We were in Rosie's little dressing room thing the other day and Rosie went is my towel on the floor and you put the towel on for all. That's right. I dropped pizza on it, which is just a ridiculous sentence for a grown up.


A drop hits on the towel and then. Well, I thought you put in the wash you'd use that towel for no.


Well, luckily, the bit of the pizza drop in was on the bit that you took in. So it was kind of on the outskirts of the towel, wasn't in the dry bit. So I just avoided it and managed to get another three days. Well, actually stopped.


And can I also say as well the amount of little flakes of chocolate I'm finding on our baby.


Right. Yeah, you know what you do with. The amount of chocolate I'm finding on I got a little onesie on and I understand why you don't eat chocolate on your mom's been troughing chocolate cakes over your sleeping body sun and just fucking rain and shards of chocolate on you.


Yeah, the mole had a mole in the neck and I was like, that's.


Fucking terrible, what lokodo? This is the one make a note of it for the divorce in the court. This is the episode. This is the fucking episode that wins me that divorce. Well, two other kids full time.


Do you actually know this episode, this episode anyway?


P.S. When you are talking about sharing towels, it reminds me of when I was about 10 and innocently used a flannel off the towel real. I was then asked by my dad who would use his special flannel, to which I quite adamantly replied, it was me, my flannel.


Well, my dad had been recovering from an operation. We couldn't get his leg wet. I'd been washing my face with it and my dad had been washing his entire body with it.


Oh yeah, Dad.


Dad said it before. Don't trust a flannel, not IBEW Babadook, but do.


Yeah. Chris and Rosie. Knowing how much you love a good first date story, I thought I'd tell you about mine. After separating from my husband, I decided to go on a dating site. Bracket's not tender extremism. Fair enough.


We'll get you, we'll get you quite quickly brackets because I'm a catch lol. I started chatting to this guy after a couple of days of talking. He decided he would like to meet up and wanted to come and see me at the weekend.


I can I just butt in there on dating site. You don't have to be a catch for people to talk to you, so I'm not trying to downplay it. You might be the absolute fittest in the world, but they're very they just talk to anybody. Wow. Yeah. Well, that's really nice of you to drop us in on this.


Really nice of you to interject this. Awful people on the inside. All right.


But I mean, you genuine piece of shit.


Well, I just want to just I just overheard you there from the table and and you want to try on the inside just, you know, so oh.


Know on the draw you've drawn the person in real life. I'm sorry. And then, you know what happens then when she gets upset, you go you say the age old. I'm just being honest.


Just thrown in. Yeah. Just being honest. I'm just saying what's on what's happened with Turned is the one.


I'm so sorry. OK, you're queen.


You don't talk to anyone. Right. You I'm surprised they even taught you of the must have been so intimidated by how gorgeous.


Well they fixed it. Thank you. Sorry about that dickhead. One of the questions he asked me was, is there a local airfield near you as I have my own plane? Oh, I'd like to fly you to the Isle of Bute for lunch.


Bullshit right about it. Why do you think bullshit?


Because I'm who? Watermann with a plane is on a dating site.


Wow. Really? So you think having a plane means you'll never be single?


Yes. Yes, that's exactly what I think you would come down on the side of it. I thought when I read this out, you'll be like, oh, what a one guy he is. What you're like, no, now got to be like and he cannot have a single crease.


Have you ever had catfish and yet do not believe what anyone sees until you see it in the flesh till she's picked up on that plane. I want even get ready. I like Texas, when do they send the picture? Then get ready. How are the North Koreans at this point?


I hadn't told him. My ex was an airline captain and didn't want to burst his bubble as he was obviously trying to impress me. So I kept it quiet and went along with it. We agreed to meet on Saturday, weather permitting. The morning arrived and it was looking promising, albeit a tad breezy as it usually is in the west of Scotland.


I arrived to find not the Biggles type. I'd imagine now that Google what beguiles is.


And it's basically that, you know, leather helmet, leather Houghtaling, goggles, tasch and why.


Yes, you know, like Aleut I kind of style. Yeah.


Not the biggest type, I'd imagine, but I thought, well, I'm here now, so in for a penny. Right. I'm guessing he's not that fit then is that which is after that which is trying to get out here.


I think she thought like Prince Philip was going to turn up on a plane so we wouldn't be driving it.


It would be like, no, I think he seven what's how many days around the world. This depends on, you know, what how many days about how long is a piece of string? Right, OK, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. Right, OK. I think she's expecting the Granda. All right. OK, from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. Van Dyke. So don't where we're going with this anyway.


Well, basically, I don't know why she said it wasn't what she imagined put in for a penny. So she's going for it.




This is this is one of the most backhanded onda like snide things I think I've ever heard anyone say, OK, I managed to colomba the very snug cockpit, just lock it off his plane.


How hard is this person to impress? Cockpit's a bit snug.


I could not imagine you dear turns up in his plane and you like it small.


Yeah. Some people you just got him. At least he has. At least he's gone and he's played in the lobby. Yeah, but she used to go out with a copnall. Well I think that's the point.


You know what I mean. Was like my ex. Yeah. Plane the Boeing 777 plane is going to mean piloted.


Oh yeah. I could be drove down.


I'll be your planner for this evening. We'll be planning at approximately 45000 feet and. Planning on over the Isle of the Mikhailov at about. 7:00 a.m. local time and during the planning. Don't forget to. I know I managed to climb the very snow carpet in Slamdunk, put my headphones on and we set off no sooner where we are cruising altitude.


Then he proceeded to tell me that his flying buddy had crashed his plane coming out of Butte, killing his father in law and given himself 40 degree burns, one hell of a fucking shot.


So he's going to go to this island and straight away there on the way to the island while they're in the air. It goes all. By the way, I met and crashed on this exact flight the other day, killing his father in law and given himself 40 degree burns. So that's a good start the day.


I can't wait for I can't wait for London. It's literally about haversacks for someone to tell them about yesterday.


I get that's the plane version of that. Just to let you know what I am looking for. You happy to go ahead. Yeah.


You were in the we're in I mean, he reassured me that he took this route hundreds of times and I had nothing to worry about. Thankfully, we landed OK and went into depute for a public. I hope I'm sitting not right. Boot boot up you, whatever. I think I think it's actually a bit bit probably after the lunch, he said, would you like to see the crash site? Well, yes.


Well, what girl would say no to that moment of happiness? After seeing the burnt out hedge and the field, we headed back to his plane and took off my heart in mouth.


Now I have a sixth sense of humor. And halfway back I made a point of looking over the side window next to me.


Then I said in a very worried voice, Is there supposed to be smoke coming out of this wing? He looked panicked and said what I said, there's black smoke pouring out of this wing. Is that normal?


The look of fear on his face was priceless. And he started to try and unbuckle himself from his seat to get a better look. At this point, I laughed and said, I'm only joke and she's a maniac.


She wears Slough to get his daughter going to do that when you're flying on his easy jet to get his own back. He took the plane into a nosedive and my stomach did a few flips. That'll teach you, he said with only a few minutes to landing. I could see the field. I could feel the nausea starting to build. We were on the descent and I couldn't hold it any longer and grab the smallest sick bag you have ever seen in your life and started to throw up.


This is horrible. This is absolutely old story.


And it was like a dating site and he's going to pick us up when he's playing. And I was going out with a captain.


So I'm like, this is going to be the most luxurious fucking shit.


They landed on our feet.


Yeah, this is horrible. The the sound.


He lands the plane and I'm still honking. Love that. Playing up. Now, local airfields are basically just a farmer's bit of land, so they are not smooth like a runway.


In fact, the total opposite, so that when he touches down, the stick in the box starts flying up in my face so that by the time we come to a standstill, I am dripping in my own bubble by words.


I drag myself out of the plane and head to the nearest toilet, relieved that I won. I am on solid ground and to he won't be asking for a kiss. While I was wrong, he did want to kiss.


Oh hey, how are the other half later.


It's unbelievably disgusting. I actually never contacted them again. And the moral of story is don't be at the mercy of a man in a tiny plane.


Still call his plane bitch and don't get in people's planes. That's really dangerous actually, when the more I think about that. Right. She could have she could have been mincemeat. What do you what?


Just hear what he might. He might if I woke up one day and thought, you know what, I don't want to be here anymore and I'm sick and I want to kill someone, he could have got him in an artistic joke. Got you. OK, and needed to be someone new. Yeah. Yeah.


I mean, we all ain't doing anyone's call together, but when I was more morbid, don't walk along the street with anyone, but I mean, the plane's a bit more in it.


You jump out of the car, you jump out of a car, you jump overcall. I've thought the same. He had a lot of times right. If I was in a car. And so with the Tuukka, with the the door was open, I would kamikaze rule out that car.


In what scenario are they attack and are they going to drive into something? Yeah. And they're telling you all they've got a gun or knife or anything.


I would unless the bones the film when the train or the lock and it's like all probably know that the the killer in bones, the lock that you try to open in the back of the car is cut that off. And he's made into a point when you try and do it, cut your fingers. You know, remember that part stuck with me.


That machine wants to know what happens is you've never seen bones know what bones are called. Bones. Brilliant.


Oh, my God.


What guys? Just see what I live with. You've never seen Bones shock. It's a collar. Bones in the next breath.


Oh, the bone collector made up of dooby dooby dooby dooby doo doo doo doo doo.


Thank you once again for listening to this week's episode of Shackman. You do now probably create a network. You know what you do a different time. A different little boy than I was at the beginning. I'm really hot now. This is really, really helped. Guys, thank you so much for listening.


It's so bloody good to be back. You and your therapy, do you all genuinely our therapy. Yeah, I hope you enjoy it. Oh, please send whatever you want to, Martin. You know, G.M. dot com butis. She should take care of you by to. The bull, the story's the biggest personalities, the best accents enjoy series from across the pond with AMC. Plus looking for romance, a discovery of witches. Is your next obsession ready to raise the stakes?


Check out what Entertainment Weekly calls one of the best new series Gangs of London. Want to get weird, doctor, who is definitely for you. Then there's the watch and exciting new series about a group of total misfits tasked with saving their world available through the platforms you're already on. Watch the most anticipated shows from the U.K. at Free and on Demand. Sign up at AMC. Plus Dotcom, AMC, plus only the good stuff.