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Do I get a negative turn off my Tik Tok Tik Tok you want to you want to be my little take cock like to talk about Madeline active? Listen to me before we start. Well, I am Trixie Mattel are so very pleased and pleasure to have you here joining us today for another riveting episode of The Bold and Beautiful.


Free on this day. It's a beautiful 78 in Los Angeles. Yes, it is are you wouldn't know that it's it's a 223 February 23rd. Now typically in the east coast of this country. This is a time where the season is is is rotten and racquet. It's Suicide Season. Absolutely cuz it's really feels like it'll never ends and it's the full episode like, you know, the holidays over New Years is over that the novelty of the new year has a long worn off and then fit braces. Who's this cold?


I see dick. I'm just going to shove down your fucking throat you bitch happens or kind of and then you get one hot day. Randomly. You're like, oh good it spring no wrong Queen Mama the Witch and the Wardrobe eight more months. I mean, I remember I moved here to LA because of the February and March was like the snowiest it was just inches in inches in inches of snow.


Dumped on Boston after February. It was like, oh you feel like okay. Maybe we're going to see the The Horizon soon. And then it said no absolutely not know and it was do you have energy miss the snow at all that stuff too cold you is there like a winter? Wonderland scenario that you feel like nostalgic for a fond of or what's the deal with that? There is a certain circadian rhythm to the winter. There's a certain excitement that the winter creates and it goes away. Okay, so it's like somebody like stepping on your foot when they stop doing that you feel good.


You feel a little more like like in Wisconsin because it's so cold when the snow melts people are like drinking Outdoors shorts going out every night restaurant every night, you know, if you work in the service industry make more money than the rest of the year. Everyone's very wealthy in the summer. I want spending money in the summer.


Play I was thinking of going home this month and I was like, it's really not even worth it. Now wait till the snow melts. I'm sorry to get very hot there in the summertime. Yes, unbearably. Yeah, it's 80 in the daytime zadie at night. It's so hot and humid at night. When you sleep with like your legs open with no blanket just breathing with your mouth open cuz it's hot like your testicles fans on you. And you have to flip yourself over like a flapjack in the fans got to get that the sweat stain good circulation department and visited in Boston circulation.


I mean, which is what I have now. That's what all I have. Now. I just learned how to turn my heat on the other day for the first time with a year-and-a-half, 2 years never had to turn the heat on although I got to stay it's one of those things were like, I'm I'm prone to the situation. We're like you settle for less and you just accept that.


Don't you you like normal people I think would be like, oh here's I'm sort of like faced with this unreasonable situation and in my living space. I'm just going to deal with that. Don't do that or what you will say. Oh, no, not me right away that I will endure without asking the question. If you could be different I have this is this like a human right? Right that is covered in my rent was eating dinner and I was eating the Campbell's vegetarian vegetable alphabet soup with goldfish sprinkled in it, and I looked forward to it.


I was saving the soup for a night when I really wanted to feel it I conceived soup.


Icc Sweet Escape, my love to my music groups are called me and said are you eating soup. Soup up your whole that's why I normally YouTube and I poop out the mouth for the first time ever unprecedented in my apartment. And I don't I don't know that I love it because honestly, there's a there's a going to light it real light it is it is it a thermostat you can set it there's a thermostat but then there's a very strange this is very prominent while unit thing that involved a pilot light so it wouldn't even let do it.


No wasn't let now it's black and I bet you I felt like there's a large chance. I was like, okay. I know something about highlights. I feel like if you don't like them then that's bad or whatever. And so I thought this is that when my units to give me injuries like pressing the button nose like we're going at this is it we're going at this whole buildings Going Up in Flames. This is over but it just it was a whoosh like your cut ourselves on fire and then.


Is let in the Nets fine, and now it's a simple Act of turning it on and off to adjust the thermostat in this heat in apartment, but I just feel like there's no challenge now, right you just have to bundle up. You just have to have friends over just to breathe on you. I had when I had two friends over recently and one of them said can we turn the heat on and I said no, I don't even know how I don't do that this building built in 2006.


I believe central heat Central. Are you just set it of the temperature and it's always at temperature that and I want to go back my old house over and was like Beverly Laurel or whatever. I did. They didn't have a lot of these old buildings Los Angeles don't have heat and then the landlord is only required to give you space heaters. So I would just have if its cold 50° at night out of space heater nothing. I'm sorry. I did two years. I lived here like that.


I don't mind it. I don't think it's a problem. I honestly well we'll ever tracked I see me cuz I wasn't here from it much much of the time obviously before covid-19 insta hot but.


This past year being home all through winter. I only needed it one week I think so. I had a space heater. That didn't work very well, but I just felt like oh this is you do you put another layer on baggy layers? Yeah. Thank you. Larry looks tube socks that people in LA are often like I'll never get to wear that you know Jordache. Yeah. Yeah, so that your scars and start happening. Although I was going to bed fully clothed. I'm talking like I'm talking like sweaters jeans and a shirt a sweatshirt and socks jeans sleeping in Jean but it was an it was I was interested in finding new thing things.


I previously found unacceptable likes wearing socks to bed now. I don't care. I wear socks. But all the time is that bizarre, but I'm here alone. I like it to be kind of warm at night helps me relax.


You don't have the mccrystal milk. When I read a boot into it nice glass of hot milk is over. David's body idles at about a hundred degrees. So I need it. He sleeps next to the big bay window or whatever and I crank that shit all the way open cuz I need cold air blowing on him. So the time that air passes his body it is acceptable. You don't find that. I love the only thing I like about the cold cold cold is to sleep is is unparalleled.


It is just fantastic for me as a very warm person. I meet with David in this in this regard. I think I sleep deeper when I never get cold in the night you make up chilled cheap teeth chattering breasts perky meat like nipples pineapples have Kyle deceased. I've had these sheets for they're not old and brand. Let me tell you. Bollandbranch. I've had them for years and they're at this point. There's I don't know how I sleep.


But at this point there's Freddy Krueger slices going through the bed sheets holes from what I don't know night terrors of the night. Then I was you know, I know I don't know how to order marijuana marijuana and he pulls back the comforter and the sheets have slits in them and he goes he looks me that goes and I was waiting for you to ask about that. I learned a lot about 45 minutes. I know what I noticed if you pop a half a milligram of that gummy you put on acrylic nails you she would like file them down two points and then you just need to go running ragged Alexa to play the Sam Smith version of I feel loved and I standing here scratch my own bed and why you tape the the the sheets down to east corner the bed you get under there and you just go scratch scratch scratch.


I don't know what happened even match long story short is that no matter how successful I get there are parts of me that are so programmed settle for less than.


Android quality of life and that will never change. Yeah, I think that's good. It keeps each other to the desert of the real the real world quote of the super heated up wasn't even hot enough but I didn't want to go back to the microwave and squared off. We already had our peace, you know, we said our piece. Do you do a wash them? She's I'd love to expose you right now. How often do you watch them enough? Maybe once a month. Gross? I think so technically that is gross.


Do you do you only have those but you don't have like an extra set no get to rotate the set. We have three sets of sheets to go to rotate them because apparently in this is just a thing, you know.


I mean.


Do you have to wash them it is it is recommended to wash them twice a week. Are you fucking kid? I may not kidding. I was doing that people who have helped. Let's say that or people have a lot of time or people who have five sets of five six sets of sheets because I have three sets of sheets and I washed I I do them whenever I I did whenever I do laundry, but sometimes that's once a month, you know, I have a set of guess sheets that are nicer than my sheets.


I don't even like shopping though, but you don't need to get any but none of them.


Cleaning help. I thought about it many times. I thought about it when I walked into your kitchen. Oh my kitchen. I have an update. So what monkeys that kitchen is 12 Monkeys the kitchen is she is very very Nightmare on Elm Street. Very Grey Gardens Sleepaway Camp. So I do I think it's I'm a person who does not like the my kitchen sucks. I hate it. I hate everything about it being in there. I hate cooking food. I don't like the look in the food. I don't like games cooking for you is anything that involves an appliance or a thing going on or a food item has been changed somehow or heated or cooled or United mean when you turn food into poop, that's also cooking.


Yeah. That's that's my body. I buy a Kraft mac and cheese. I don't like that answer that you don't do that. I don't like mac and cheese cooking was involved juicing. So I put a whole bunch of shit into a fucking lender and I'm talking.


I have a ninja know I got that the food and she's extremely powerful. She's extremely powerful and she's here to show people that she still got it. I put a whole rack of lamb in there.


I am very afraid I put the whole large cheese pizza with the box in the Vitamix, you know delivery guy earrings Village of the Damned your your white headed son or daughter would be like crazy for like or like a string cheese like the skin. We just do boot. Like I just like yogurt and the phone the phone would be tough, but it would get it. It would go. I mean the backbone would be I don't like that. I was really if you took somebody's hand it would just make mincemeat out of that motherfucker.


Yeah, and I took I did Ida lovely weird. I got to say I know it's probably boring. I want to listen, this is Los Angeles. We are mostly white and we are here to talk about juices ingredients and I want you to Smith green apple.


2 in facts and I die just to not allow Apples to Apples. I took out the center Neil Bambam for cats just throw the whole thing in there and then it did spinach spinach and then I went to Juiced 2 full lemons put it in there stranded those seeds and that's big smoothie while it was huge. It was the it was the whole picture. Why did you go so big because I knew I wasn't going home. So you just I wanted to go big you're not going home right leg.


So and then to Lime squeeze them with my hands and then I was like, I just as I've been and put blueberries in there. I don't know why and then I put volume powder while what you did was while President unprecedented in there. We got called in for a sponsor. I said, what's that doing? What's up on there? Put it in there?.


Fish oil whatever and then I just kept going and going and they put water added some more Beliebers NM. The thing was that can I think the blueberries is really where I went wrong. It's tasted so very philosophy was a lot of fiber per lot of 535 breast recipe. It was rotten. He came out on light pink magenta and up you cash and I had to chew it back and I had a like I stuffed ICE train some of the juice so I can just really get that down not a great taste disgusting.


What kind of Miss minchin's Seminary for girls self-torture discipline wasn't torture. If you want to talk juice torture. We could talk we can talk about some real nasty ingredients. But we okay. What do you think about the master cleanse? I think it is. I think it is for self-harm cuz I was reading about it and some people say they change their lives young Clarity and then the doctors have.


And there's no way this helps, you know, if it is a form of self-harm know about nutrition in about cleansing and all that stuff. You'll notice that there are at any given time and I'm not even talk about fad diets and I talked about like The Fad diets that come and go at any given time. There is so much information out there that is that could work or could not work could be great for you and could actually bring you into the ground if it's so individual with the diet with with the nutrition stuff.


So for me, it's all psychological. What do you mean?.


Like I love smoothies. It doesn't taste like health food but it is so I can meet you halfway. What's health food? What if I have a smoothie? It's an apple. It's a bunch of spinach. It's maybe some almond milk. It's a scoop of vegan protein or whenever it health food tastes delicious. Yeah, so I'm being tricked. I'm enjoying it. Okay, like the likelihood of me sitting down eating a salad with those ingredients is not high. It's all psychological tricks peckish almonds frozen bananas. It's literally ice cream frozen fruit fruit fruit is nature's candy fruit is nature's candy.


Let me tell you after making my own smoothies cuz I got that bubbly Smeg blender for Christmas my boyfriend David. Thank you high. I have had found out that the smoothie stores or highway robbery. Of course, they are very,.


1215 West Hollywood, I don't care I don't care if I come in there and you go didn't you come for us and I say yes, I did give you my skinny drink, please because those are 15. Dave and I are going for breakfast $30 for two smoothies across the street from a grocery store. I bet they're buying food that's on the brink of rotten rotten freeze it so I mean because that's what fruit tastes the best. If you breathe then it's just crazy to open a smoothie shop cuz that's the real rub.


Here's the thing though my smoothies at that shot to be open with three times more because I value my time too much you want me to make you a smoothie is going to cost $60 to $5 and I'm going to take $40 and I might even go take a nap in the middle to take 2 hours to go to put that order in early and it still didn't get it. Honestly telling me that the Smoothie you make is A Pink Nonono. That was a fluke.


I took a left turn and I shouldn't have done that. But the green smoothie I made was absolutely fucking delicious tons of fiber. It was a shots like the cayenne pepper. Hello. I do scams scheme and ginger. I like the it's something that is I'm less interested in the whatever. I don't feel is happening to my body but believe that it is Janae mean I want its direct benefits and like its it wakes you up.


How does wake you up for sure, cuz it's like a it's a lot. I'm going to take a break.


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With this is a secret of beauty trippin balls. Are you getting enough fiber? How would I know? What are your bowel movements like very regular very consistent cuz I haven't been drinking. Okay, because the running your body. Oh, that's right talk about this beautiful lady is is snatched in high and tight. Yeah. I do want to get into it too much because I don't wanna be that person you want to brag about it, but I literally ran 60 miles on Saturday 60-mile Uber the other day and I thought about you the whole time so I could run for an Uber.


I put the location where I was late told she would like to go to a podcast and I was like, it was the sole brothers and I was like, they're so nice and haven't asked.


Storm don't ask me why interesting scary spooky spooky real brushes with death, but I will try to run a run for the Uber doing be late. And if I put in the wrong location who cares blow up a block and a half.


I couldn't believe it. It was so difficult and I want I've got into the cat or the car and I sweat it out the whole time. I sweated the whole time. I was like I had the window open. I was like just pouring sweat. That was a block-and-a-half. Yeah. I mean I've been training since maybe September 3rd winning or linear, but I started training training like September.


And I will say the other day when I was running my 60 miles around 9. I got a phone call and took it and kept running and I went I just ran almost 10 miles in a comfortably on the phone for a while and kept running. That's incredible. Believe it. I'm turning over a new Leaf Fitness wise. I really want to get into long-distance running with my training regimen. What am I doing this weekend Kane know because it's endurance running under honestly, honestly truly. Well, let me tell you this I went on I went to I went to the Deep Creek fantasy with my yoga teacher and he does not he does not smoke.


I'm a heavy smoker Mary we fucking Crush that hike on the way it was so difficult all uphill. I mean he would like it was like doing the hard part of running 5 times and it was like in a row and it was just like hell after he left there till after he was I mean, call amount of of incline and we we did it. We just I wasn't lagging behind.


We're right there.


So my point is.


I'm not quitting smoking. What do I do feed running is endurance running and your body doesn't respond to anything quickly. Well, so it's all about starting slow but I do but how am I how ya like you could start your first week doing like 15-20 minute length runs, probably everyday or every other day. That's too long though. It's not okay 20 minutes. You can probably burn out like a little 2 miles comfortably. Are you out of your mind to my house in 20 minutes for me? I hope I guess maybe not to start yet but there are people who run a mile in like 5 minutes.


I know that since that's the Deepika physical. I think we talked about this Bryce from the pit crew ultramarathon would not ever trivialize mental illness in any way that I ever thank running a hundred miles is some kind of self flogging. Yeah. It's it's it's a flagellation off at. Oh, yeah some gardening shears.


Quicker and easier quicker and easier and it certainly less painful but I realized at 31 finding my my place in the athletic Community finding a sport that I actually like that's good. I wish I had found in about 10 years ago because I did not let my internalized homophobia and fear of straight men make me feel like I could really participate in sports. Okay, but running running is a sport did yeah, but you think it's fair for you to my door because you're a fag and you don't want it running was like, well, I'm not going to go try to befriend some straight guys.


That makes me uncomfortable but running is basically antisocial and extremely good for you. I wish I would have found that we could do it anywhere. You don't need much much gear you go to the sand of the beach you can do in the sand in the beach. I love I love activities that don't require any gear.


Although I don't worry. You don't bring anything. I would low. OK I would love to you said you had mentioned that you would like to get into little bit more weight training because you all you've been doing is running anyone like for my poison ivy. Is it a certain point I tell if you don't build your muscles, right? I've got to I've got to work out for you murder. It's a four sets of it's only 20 minutes the 16 16 minutes change your life. What is XD minutes is 4 sets of Tabata intervals in a row no break.


So it's it's in 4 minute chunks sew-in enduring 4 minutes to do 20 seconds of high-intensity activity followed by 10 seconds of rest eight times in a row 20 on 10 off 20 on 10 off 20 on turn off. So you rest for 10 seconds. That's 4 minutes. Then you do another one so I did push-ups.


20 seconds on 10 seconds rest did you that eight times by the eighth set your fucking cooked then? I am sorry. I did pull ups first assisted with the with the band on the pull-up bar. Well and your your nurse 16 minutes change your life do they get together? They got me together. Also, I didn't like, you know trying to stay inspired sounds like you know what I used to read Men's Health everyday memory said one that told all the time that you still do. I don't know what this is about.


Everything it for about three years. Okay, okay.


And the other day I pull up my iPad and I said I want to get an hour to get back into men's health. I'm going to see if I can still subscribe and unsubscribe me more I've been subscribed. How do you go to the African American in st. Paul? This previous really long and then I went when I've bought every issue. I got matically for about 4 years. I don't realize how much you have a subscription Magazine subscription. How much is a mega description year. It can't be that much is probably $40 in 2018 worth in 2003.


I need a little more than a guy in some gym shorts you do. I need a I need Fear Factor to draw the dick on the shorts and to kind of fill in the rest of your imagination. I do like to read about the cover person and what they did to look like that cuz you know, sometimes it's people at usually Hollywood actors training for a role in it. Feel like a Navy SEAL or something. Yeah. Yeah. It'll be like, all right. I'm at 4 a.m. I'm up having for hard boiled eggs remind me to buy I am obsessed with the Stars the celebs who talk about their, the chicken everyday explain second stage of conveniently leave out the part where they talk up where they don't talk about this testosterone and HGH they're taking and the food that was professionally prepare for their number one grow their own fucking steroid every single what is impossible to get to go from like Bob regular to Joe jacked in like six months.


Is it possible you cannot do that with just chicken at 4 a.m. What do you know Camille? Niqab Johnny is going to terrorize he said that without Hollywood level help. It is not a cheap know it's not you got to buy your vitamins. You got doctors from Beverly Hills shooting up their butt with all kind of stuff. I like if you're hungry when you get cast in Superman. I bet you can write in your contract that they pay for your personal trainer. Mary always a celebrity personal trainer that always in their consciences often paid by the Studio's so somebody's got its the studio will hire a trainer to whip, you know by man halfway into shape for Batman or whatever and yeah, but I'm telling you even with the funding even with everything halting in your life to a screeching halt that you can just focus on that you still time is the enemy you can get a body you can go from black regular ripped ends in 6 months without a little bit of hormonal help.


Well, especially since the you're cutting out.


The action of gaining weight and then losing like Sasha Belle was talking about in the gaining and losing if you're cutting all that out. You can't grow that much in that time without will match a little magic magic. Well, I so everybody, you know, this is actually relevant relevant to the Neverland.


Every man becomes La is it is it is faced with the kind of hard reality that all gay men on steroids and you think well, yeah, they are all the men are the same here. You are go to the gym and its many everybody's on the cycle or is everybody's coming off a cycle are going on a cycle. Whatever it's so common. I don't think I mean it's not legal a lot of times we spent with happening this cycle that people go on our are Black Market or off off the what do I do on it?


I just take that way Off Broadway shoe store. I've seen with my own two eyes that the wild in in Psych crazy mood swings some of the side effects of these Cycles are like, oh, yeah, right what like.


You are you know the type of road rage? Yeah, there's but there's like insane like a mood swings like you just become you kind of your getting a little crazy little bit. I've seen I was at a party a couple years ago where this guy though, I knew was on a cycle was like, I'm just looking at him. He was like on the floor just Everybody's Talkin ride that he wouldn't she would literally like you could be like it was almost like the colors were changing his face to break the moods with just kind of wash over a man come in and out in like we go from like really engaged and then totally like animated and was angry and then it was like peanuts with it.


So bad that if you didn't know he was using you would still clock it you would say what is wrong with that guy. I am not on any other drugs I knew for a fact but anyways, it also scrambles your insides and what kind of like if you do the what kind of like regimen you're on its skin have a lot of like the Dutch Mental effects in your inner.


Internet working but people what is the time thing people ain't got time to wait to get ripped and jacked because everybody was Jack yesterday. I delete with drag were a little exempt because of course I want to be fit and thin but I can't be blocky and masculine know you couldn't you couldn't gain 50 pounds of muscle and still be Trixie Mattel now.


Yeah, I said Daddy of your dream if she is such a so I don't give up.


She said to me Instagram it she really is CrossFit like a bodybuilder bodybuilder body during the night time. She's in drag at the theater during the day. She's outside the theater. She has her CrossFit set up outside the theater permanently out there reading CrossFit like a whole weight training the bars that you like to hang out and all that. Yes. She is a jacked jacked Tina Aguilera and I think but I don't know she did Jack here Daddy. She wears those big baby dolls that come up to her neck and go to the rest.


She's full coverage take a break.


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And we're back. You're pretty disciplined with your business. If you truly wanted to change your body you could very quickly because you don't care about food that much. You know, I am no, that's my benefit. And I once I get a bug in my ear about something I become very very myopic and focused on it and I've always said this and I think like you have to I don't understand. I just I don't want to like at the lake. I hated my body. I just don't I don't understand that.


I've done anything you can do. That's fun. I think it has a lot to do with the way people feel about people seeing them with their body. Absolutely. Okay, I Greg. Yeah for a lot of people they don't hate working out. They hate going to a place where other people are working out and then having to do it in front of them, but that's fair that was explained to me by somebody a friend of mine who is plus size was like I like working out. I just don't want to go do it in front of people.


You don't understand that feels like I never been that size.


I've been sizes where I don't feel like taking my shirt off but like that's different than.


Well, he said it's not even if you take out the body shame part of it. It's also like I don't want to go to a tumbling class for I'm level one and their level 12 or whatever. I feel like I'm bad. Like if I have bad technique or I'm just starting out in something. I do want to make a fool out of myself. So there's that as well start Michelle Kwan Nancy Kerrigan the whole way through. Yeah. Yeah, but know that there is also I'm at Google go to the gym gym is the least it is nice because for some people if your phone get home gym, it's hard to commit when you're like Jim mode in home mode is is it's hard to like cross those wires easy.


I have that. I have a hack for you. You ready for this gym. I have a very I have a way of the four by four feet or something at at the mats and stuff. I have a pull-up bar. I have some free weights you really needing to wait to pull up bars grade can hang.


But I'm a band so very very minimal set up. I'll put my sneakers in Milo shorts or leggings on and I'll change it to a gym shirt. I will leave the house. I'll come right back inside and I'll go to the area but I'm not joking. I will leave the house. I'll bring walk at 12 or 15 Steps lock myself out. I live outside for 3 months. I'll come right back in with a purpose and I have my water and I have a protein shake me about go get it later.


I have to go right there. If we have fun, then it's party time interesting.


Or you can let go into another room, but you don't have to leave the house if you want to but you have to get out of there and then go in there and I hate working on it. I love running. I hate working on a home. I have the amount with the weights and I put the deposit on the TV and it's fine, but the gold is to bother, you know, not to give away. My address book Gold is around here and it's like well then I go there and then I feel like well, I'm not going to be here and play on my phone cuz I just want to do it and leave so it's almost like they're done switching to gym mode get it done and leave 30 minutes later.


Goodbye, you know if your healing.


You scream. I really want to do this about that with you I really want to do is puke puke puke. But it will get you every exercise goes to Absolute muscle failure, but that's the only liability of the marathon's running and they look all crazy and I'm not even in your eyes are crossed. You ready just collapse in a minute pull up my music for a music producer Nick runs marathons and triathlons and he said what time is running and he was like I could do it with a smell was and it looked up and they curl in front of him had poop running down her legs do the diaper time.


To poop yet what they listen to maybe this is crossing at this. It's that I've crossed the threshold of my life where I'm going from physical fitness to self harm your not a bad athlete or a bad person and you pooped in the toilet, right? Yeah, you're not yet. Exactly. You're not cheating. You know what I want to be the person who fucking pinched a huge Loaf and my my squeakers my sneakers in speakers at the end of the movie showing it off.


The race like it yourself not committed. I see it as I walk away just rabbit turds falling out of my don't know you've got even the distance you have sewed Pockets into those running store before the marathon because you knew you were going to fill up his pocket with lots of turd. Yea or I'm running and it comes out I reach and I grabbed it and I throw it off the track. I'm throwing it another competitor to try to do for water. New face. You throw a turd in their face?


Oh my God.


Is Duncan Perry rated at?.


They hold out the water cup and I do think you and I can I pour it in there and I try to flush the cup and it doesn't flush. I just don't think it's worth it. I think it's okay to do to stop the race and okay. It's actually okay. What are you doing it for? What's the most here's another thing. Listen I have nothing is a means to an end. If you are you just your Gal Gadot. You just got cast in Wonder Woman's golf. But yeah, okay is playing Wonder Woman how funny is that?


God was a woman. I've never heard of something so funny.


Do dog a do and so she's got six months or Justin Timberlake a grueling torturous. Just nothing but chicken 4 a.m. First day of shooting. She gets killed. What a horrible way to wait 6 months now don't think that's if that happened 6 months gun. You don't want it. You can suffer with six months before you're going to look great funeral get okay. Yeah good point. But then you know what it where's the quality of life? What we were made when I die. They're going to Weekend at Bernie's me at like a dab as I can for model.


And so I'm going to look really gone and I'm looking stuff. Yeah, and I will be holding a handbag.


Listen, here's the here's my beauty. And here's my bald beautiful lesson. When you're when you're make sure that your beauty routine or your Fitness routine is not a means to an end. And that's for real. You have to enjoy to some extent you have to be able to talk to drop into the present moment of whatever you're doing because if you're just torturing yourself for the end result or even if you are torture will not to sound like mr. Woo. Woo, but when I used to run to try to beat then it was a means to an end run to be thin me there is no God, there is no accountability.


There is no way to track if it doesn't mean anything now but running with the consciousness of the distance the time the pace goals Ambitions that changed everything the weight loss happen faster because I wasn't in it for that doesn't make sense. But as a person who has never athletic that was not clear to me.


And then they say in the runs they say I think about what you want to get out of this and I think it's Fitness. It's just like what you actually want to do. This is this how you want to learn about your self. Do you want more energy? You want to fit a certain outfit you want like what do you actually want of us?.


And then there's some real like there's a real Finish Line to that even mean yes, but I will say that when that be was like why you work out to be hot, but doesn't mean anything no. No, but be careful. Because when do the human mind and the body travel in very different speeds. So by the time that your body has actually made some progress your mind will be way over Way Beyond that in that like, oh it's like if you look on papers like the last six weeks, I'm actually like lost a few pounds or or gained a few pounds of muscle or become my insurance is your mind is already adjusted and moved on unimpressed.


So like your beauty mean like you're mine was a really good point never be satisfied. That is a losing battle at always lose battle that comes and accepting wherever you are at the moment again, because the happiness is not in the six weeks from now what you want to get out of it. So it's the only way to track that you didn't.


Yeah, you can still have it going to be hot or does anything anything. Anyway, I think we said enough. I think we've said enough. I think I'm going to say something. I hope it's not me. For somebody who is maybe some issues. I think your relationship with your with Fitness is always like very attacked. You know, why raised right? But the fitness my family my John at my dad. Yeah. My dad is a fitness icon. You don't happen to me. Where is wrong? My mom called me the other day my mom diabetic.


She, she goes. Well I made this last would be its bladder flour sugar. Anyway, the recipe said Better Than Sex chocolate and I didn't think it was that good, but I have been a while my mom puts me in the phone.


11 seconds valve. Thanks Val. Thanks Obama.


River Valley Mills.